16.08 Primary Election Endorsement Election August 9, 2012, Volume 16, Issue 8, MauiTime

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August 9, 2012 ✚ Volume 16 ✚ Issue 08 ✚ FREE FREE

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AUGUST 9, 2012

Contents VOLUME 16 + ISSUE 08

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION: What was your favorite portrayal of the President in a TV show or movie?

August 9, 2012 ✚ Volume 16 ✚ Issue 08 ✚ F REE

Cover design by graphic designer and multi-media specialist Walter Hawk from Eugene, Oregon. Art direction by Darris Hurst.

Editor: Anthony Pignataro (808) 283-1308 / anthony@mauitime.com @apignataro on Twitter Peter Sellers in Dr. Strangelove

Art Director & Production Manager: Darris Hurst artdirector@mauitime.com / darrishurst.com Darrell Hammond as Bill Clinton Saturday Night Live Graphic Designers: Amy Mendolia (Benjamin Walker in Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Killer) Christina Tarleton Contributors: Caeriel Crestin, Jory John, Avery Monsen, Ron Pitts, Chuck Shepherd, Barry Wurst II Photographer: Sean Michael Hower mauiweddingmedias.com / howerphotography.com Jim Curley in In The Line Of Fire Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers (808) 283-3260 / brad@mauitime.com Donald Pleasence in Escape From New York

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NEWS & VIEWS FEATURE STORY EAT & DRINK THIS WEEK’S PICKS FILM CRITIQUE FILM TIMES DA KINE CALENDAR THE GRID CLASSIFIED HOROSCOPE MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

Admin. Executive: Keo Eaton (808) 244-0777 Calendar Assistant: Jenna Schamber calendar@mauitime.com Jack Nicholson in Mars Attacks!) Proofreader: Dina Wilson Office Assistant: Sara Riley (808) 244-0777 Will Ferrell as George W. Bush on Saturday Night Live Admin. Assistant: Jennifer Brown Kevin Kline in Dave Intern: Megan Hazen

BY READERS LIKE YOU

ON THE COVER:

Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter Morgan Freeman from that one movie where he played the president

Food, Drink, Lifestyle, & Business News Editor: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter Robin Williams in Night at the Museum

READER FEEDBACK

MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright Š 2012 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. MauiTime may be distributed only by MauiTime’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime. MauiTime 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 • fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com facebook.com/mauitime, @mauitime on Twitter Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of MauiTime

HATES BIG PROJECTS THAT COULD KILL REEFS Maui has the best politicians money can buy and most were bought long ago. Graft is, after all, a sacred Maui county government tradition. I watched the reefs at Kaanapali finish dying off after six hotels were built in 1980. I am still seeing development rotting the reefs of Wailea, Kihei and Makena. The reefs at Ulua, Mokapu and Keawakapu and many more? Already dead. Years ago after a sudden heavy cloudburst upcountry, I watched a flash flood of runoff violently rip out 20 feet of the “Old Kings Highway� just south of Makena landing. Pesticides, phosphates, nitrates, filth and hundreds of golf balls vomited into the sea. All along the shoreline was a thick, smelly, brown-black poisonous muck. For months visibility was zip. No light means suffocation. A 1,500 home development at Olowalu (“Reef At Risk,� May 3, 2012)? This incredibly unique Hawaiian reef is to be smothered. One good storm, it’s done. Testifying does little good when the fix

is already in. Why would we want to save Olowalu’s one-of-a-kind reefs and bountiful marine life? How will that slip money into a politician’s pocket? There’s a terrible thing about being honest and elected on Maui. To get anything done, you have to constantly compromise in order to get others in county government to vote with you to get what’s obviously best for Maui. You have to agree to vote for those developments the majority of our leaders traditionally receive bribes and kickbacks for. Tit for tat. It’s gonna take a surgeon to fix it. Don’t let Olowalu perish at the claws of county government. Amputation at the voting booth is the only solution. Bring your friends!

-Robert Baker, via email

LOVES CASE, HATES PIGNATARO Don Young clarified that his endorsement is limited to the primary election. This should come as no surprise (Coconut Wireless, Aug. 9, 2012). I’m pretty sure every single Republican in the country is “endorsing� Mazie [Hirono] in this primary because poll after poll has shown that Ed does much better than Mazie in a head to head against [Linda] Lingle. In any case (pun intended), luckly this election is near an end, since Mr. [Anthony] Pignataro has apparently been unable to write about anything other than how Ed Case is a non-entity in the race. Unfortunately, his near obsession with doing so suggests exactly the opposite.

-Caleb Rowe, via MauiTime.com

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editor@mauitime.com, MauiTime 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793, twitter.com/mauitime, or facebook.com/mauitime. We reserve the right to edit feedback. Views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of MauiTime.

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QUIZunderstood

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an Aug. 6 story in Pacific Business News. What was the median price for single-family homes in the county back in July, 2011? A. $448,000. B. $398,500. C. $375,000. D. $401,500. E. $394,500.

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The Maui County Council voted 7-1 on Thursday, Aug. 2, to approve the proposed Olowalu Town, which will add 1,500 homes to the currently tiny Olowalu. Who was the lone County Council member who voted against the project? A. Riki Hokama. B. Elle Cochran. C. Danny Mateo. D. Gladys Baisa. E. Mike Ward.

2.

Here in Maui County, the median price for a single-family home was $491,000 in July, according to

3. On Thursday, Aug. 2, federal district Judge Susan Oki Mollway on Oahu ruled in favor of two American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) clients. What did the ACLU’s clients, both of whom were women, ask for? A. The right to marry, not secure a civil union with, each other in Hawaii. B. The right to get a concealed weapons permit. C. The right to go topless in public. D. The right to marry men currently incarcerated in federal prison. E. The right to eat vanilla pudding through a straw. See answers, page 29

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Po‘ohalakawilip‘h‘naum‘lamalamaakap‘mahina Bryson Atay, 27 was born in Kahului, Maui. But if you asked him, he’d say, “I from Hana!” Po‘ohala had a way about him, a way his Hawaiian ancestors referred to as “pa‘akiki” or unyielding. Unyielding like that of a confident warrior, he was steadfast in his own convictions and fiercely passionate about that which he loved. It was his upbringing with his extended ‘ohana of aunties, uncles and large group of loving cousins that he learned what it was to be unconditionally loved, genuinely adored and fiercely cared for. A kind of “Aloha” that he would extend to the many people he would encounter. Remembered as the “life of the party” and everyone’s best friend, Po‘o embodied a spirit and energy that was larger than life. A dynamic individual and world traveler, he had an infectious charisma that drew people of various places, cultures and social positions to him. From jetsetting with celebrities to L.A., Vegas and Miami to working the organic farm with his father, he was a master of social relationships and always brought people together in love and unparalleled bliss. Everyone wanted Po‘o to be around because he had the rare ability to take the most mundane of things and turn it into the most epic experience of your life. He was a respected protector and confidant, full of wisdom and genuine goodness. This world was blessed to have him and his legacy of “Aloha” will carry on throughout time. We will all miss our warrior of life Po’ohala. Noho me na Ali‘i e ku‘u pa‘ipunahele (Dwell with Kings my love, my favorite). He is survived by his father Alika Atay, mother Janet Brown, stepmother Maile Atay, s iblings Moani Tiare Marie Atay and Matahi Kekoa Damien Atay, his Tutu Man Donny and Tutu Lady Fely “Naki” Atay, Grandma Nancy and Papa Nicky, Aunty Karen and his cousins: Kamoi, Alexander “Shura Boy,” Travis, Jason, Ho‘ala, Keola, Kehau, Mahie, Kainoa, Shauntay, Kapuaimilia, Chad, Uakea, Kalei, Matthew and Mackenzie; his nephews and nieces: Connor, Alyssa, Casey, Phoenix, Kahoku Alaka‘I, Raymond, Chloe, Hayden, and Daisy, and the love of his life Malia Hudgins and his “hanai” daughter Kalia Hudgins. Services will be held at Hope Chapel in Kihei at 12pm on Saturday, August 18.

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Talk of the Island

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO are also running but have no challengers. Mateo and Pontanilla are termed out, but Pontanilla is running against Gil KeithAgaran for the 9th District state House seat.

BUT CANE SMOKE MAKES HAZE, TOO... How’s this for some shocking news. According to an Aug. 6, 2012 statement sent out by Earthjustice, Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) data “shows that visibility is impaired ‘virtually all the time at most national parks and wilderness areas.’” Specifically, the environmental legal organization notes, “Visibility in the western United States is about 60–100 miles, or half to two-thirds what it would be without human-caused air pollution... [while] in the eastern United States, the average visual range is less than 20 miles, or approximately one-fifth of the visibility range under natural conditions.” Pretty depressing, don’t you think? Earthjustice thinks so, which is why they

LIPOA POINT UNPRESERVED! Yeah, folks, you read that right. On Thursday, Aug. 2, five members of the Maui County Council voted to approve Maui Land & Pineapple Company's request to take about 150 acres of Lipoa Point–the heart of legendary surf and snorkeling spot Honolua Bay, and the subject of land development controversy for decades–out of preservation. ML&P's stated reason was that the company needed the land as collateral for its 1,600 pensioners. That's right: one of the most beautiful and popular natural wonders of the island reduced to collateral. You know, it was just four years ago that the Maui Land spokesperson insisted to me that the company's plan (at that time) was for an 18-hole golf course and 40 luxury homes that did not encroach on Lipoa Point. In fact, at the time Maui Land president David Cole boasted to a Maui No Ka Oi reporter that he had a Save Honolua Coalition bumper sticker on his car "because I want to save Honolua, too." Of course, the company's board sacked Cole in the early 2009 after the company sustained bad losses. Which might, at least in part, explain why things are so different now. According to Save Honolua Coalition President Tamara Paltin, who attended the hearing, Councilmember Mike White made the motion, with Mike Victorino seconding. Councilmembers Gladys Baisa, Joe Pontanilla and Danny Mateo joined them, with Elle Cochran (a past president of Save Honolua Coalition), Don Couch and Bob Carroll voting nay (Riki Hokama was absent). Before the vote, Paltin pleaded with the council to keep Lipoa Point the way it was. " If the Maui County General Plan is a comprehensive blueprint for the physical, economic, environmental development and cultural identity of the county then Lipoa point MUST be left in preservation as indicated by the professional planners and the undeveloped 220+ acres mauka of Lipoa MUST be included in that designation as supported by the community," she said, according to the written copy of

her testimony she provided to MauiTime. "The corporation asks the council to consider Lipoa point as collateral for it’s [sic] 1,600 pensioners, we ask the council to consider everyone, na keiki o ka aina, visitors, residents and future generations, what will happen to Lipoa point if the corporation defaults on its loan? Why have negotiations stalled? It is not because the community is not committed." Reached a day after the vote, Couch said there was still a chance to save the point. "My thought was that they have plenty of land, and not just this," Couch said a day after the vote, acknowledging the time already spent on preserving the land and the huge number of residents who want to see the land stay the way it is. "There's a ring around the shoreline that's still in preservation." Couch added that while reverting the entire point to preserved status wasn't likely, it was still possible for the county to acquire the land. "Then it [last night's vote] would be a moot point," Couch said, though he admitted that the acquisition process–which has been ongoing for some years–"is in limbo." He added that he would try to revive the acquisition process. In case you were wondering, Victorino, Baisa and Couch are all running in contested races for reelection. White, Cochran and Carroll

PHOTO BY SEAN M HOWER

Honolua Bay

rule that allows aging coal plants to avoid installing up-to-date emission controls if they are located in states that participate in an emissions trading program,” stated the EarthJustice press release. Earthjustice Coal Program Director Abigail Dillen added in the news release that “Americans deserve to breathe clean air and actually see the magnificent views when they visit our National Parks.” If all this sounds a bit like old news, it’s because, at least on Maui, it is. The Valley Isle may not have any coal-fired power plants, but we do have sugarcane burns and the Pu‘unene sugar mill, all of which both puts out noxious smoke and were recently determined by the EPA to NOT be a cause of the haze that afflicts Haleakala National Park. Though the EPA determined during a study this spring that agricultural burning and oil combustion contribute to about 10 percent of the “visibility degradation” at a monitoring site just outside the park, the agency also concluded that “there is no evidence of agricultural burning

Looks hazy to us

just filed suit on behalf of the Sierra Club and the National Parks Conservation Association against the EPA. “The groups are challenging a recent EPA

Overheard “I was out all day yesterday on a date with a beautiful woman. She did all the buying. I let her buy Flamin’ Hot potato chips… for the picnic on the beach. I couldn’t say no to her.” -Guy talking to his friends on Market Street in Wailuku, Aug. 6

contributing to haze at [the park itself].” For that reason, the EPA proposed no new controls on cane burning, reported The Maui News on June 8, 2012. For someone like Irene Bowie, Maui Tomorrow’s executive director, this was too much. “We don't doubt that a major contributor to visibility impairment at Haleakala is vog, laden with sulfates and other pollutants brought by Kona winds,” she wrote to the EPA, according to The Maui News. “[B]ut there is no doubt that, as the National Park Service has clearly stated, 'sugar cane processing facilities and field burning can affect air quality and visibility.’” If groups like Earthjustice are having to sue to get the EPA to restrict filthy coal-burning plants, what chance do we have out here with cane-burning? ■ anthony@mauitime.com + @apignataro To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1608n1

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MauiThing Turns Four SO WE TALK STORY WITH COMPANY MARKETING DIRECTOR ASHLEY TAKITANI

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holiday lines are the biggest collections that we design. MT: Kids seem really drawn to MauiThing tees and designs. Why is this? AT: Probably because we have a big bin of toys in our kid section for them to play with! But seriously–at MauiThing, we’re one big family. We wouldn’t be able to sustain without our wonderful friends and family who have dedicated so much time and effort into this business. We value every part of our huge Maui family, even the kids! MT: Why is art important and part of MauiThing? AT: Creativity keeps things fresh. Art is an integral part of our lives so we love to share it with the community. We’re all about showcasing local art on our walls, doing collaborative tees with new artists and teaching art to our keiki. MT: Why does MauiThing value the community interacting over art? AT: Because it has the ability to make people smile. MT: Did I see a collaboration with MT and neighboring Wailuku tattoo shop Pride Ink? AT: Yup! Our event at July’s First Friday was an anniversary celebration for MauiThing and Pride Ink–hence the event being named “Maui Pride.” Boze Kapoi at Pride Ink is a great friend of ours and an amazing artist so we always have fun working with them. MT: How easy or difficult is it to create collaborations with other artists and business owners? AT: We love collaborations! On Maui, its all about community, ohana and working together. We see the benefit with partnering with other companies around the island, even around the state... and do so as much as possible! We have a few co-branded shirts that we’ve done with Pride Ink that we sell in our store and have recently done a great collaboration with Nick Kuchar, owner and designer of Everything is Jake (great retro Hawaii prints). MT: Does your men's wear line launch new looks as often as the women’s? AT: No, the majority of our revenue comes from the women’s line. The women’s sell out quickly, so we’re constantly having to bring in new items. But for every line that comes out, you can be sure to find at least a few new men’s items. MT: What drives the men’s wear looks? AT: Men’s, women’s and kid’s designs are inspired by good things on Maui. We really try to emphasize Maui’s special characteristics on the men’s tees. For instance, we just came out with a “Mango Pickahs” t-shirt since it’s mango season and every Maui guy can remember picking mangoes from their grandma’s mango

PHOTO BY HAREN SORIL

auiThing opened up on Market Street in Wailuku four years ago as a clothing store “stuck on good.” They were determined to create designs that appealed to a local aesthetic. After celebrating four years this July, their resolve remains unwavering that art is at the heart of the this apparel firm. Their looks are inspired by nature and culture and, lately, iconic architecture. We caught up with MauiThing Marketing Director Ashley Takitani to get the scoop on their recent summer launch and growing up in Wailuku: MAUITIME: How does it feel to be anMAUITIME other year older? Another year wiser? ASHLEY TAKITANI TAKITANI: Four wonderful years on Market Street in Wailuku! Cheeeee! Our bash featured Willie K live, a summer fashion show and almost 5,000 people on Market Street! MT: What are some key pieces in MauiThing’s Summer 2012 collection? AT: Our new summer collection was unveiled at our four-year anniversary at July’s First Friday. It was inspired by bright colors, vibrant color blocking and our deep love and appreciation for Maui. We created new pieces such as “Maui Pride” and “I heart Maui” (with a Kalo leaf as a heart). MT: MauiThing has been an integral part of the Wailuku First Friday success. Why is MauiThing so involved in First Friday? What are you doing at First Friday? AT: I can’t emphasize enough how much impact First Friday has on our business. In one night, we can open for at least three extra hours, increasing our bottom line. We saw the potential in First Friday when it first started and did everything we could to draw more and more people to the event. We starting bringing live music to the street and in the past four years have had talented artists such as Willie K and Ekolu. Since the beginning, we’ve been a part of the First Friday committee and have been able to grow the event by closing the roads for safety, increasing the number of vendors and have been able to create a fabulous community event for Maui families. MT: Do you have other MauiThing events through the month? AT: Every month we have Second Saturday Art (second Saturdays of the month, 10am-12pm). Just a fun activity for kids to do on a Saturday morning. Every month we have different art projects based on the holidays or time of year. We also always have mural painting and clay fun! MT: How often does MauiThing change designs and launch collections? AT: All the time! In hopes of keeping our many return customers happy, we consistently bring in a few pieces every couple weeks to keep the store fresh. Summer and

Lesley Cummings modeling MauiThing

tree in the backyard. MT: What fabrics and cuts are sizzling the store for summer? AT: We’re all about being cute and comfy! Our fabrics are always soft and flow-ey, our designs fresh–one of those pieces that you need in two colors because you want to wear it everyday. We’ve also really been into tops with cute/unique cuts that focus on the back of the shirt. Cute backs are in. MT: What are some of the new things MauiThing is identifying with these days? AT: We’re really focusing on highlighting Maui towns and their unique landmarks. For instance, we’ve done a Wailuku bridge t-shirt, as well as a Haiku Surf-

board Fence tee and tank. MT: So what does “MauiThing” mean anyway? AT: At MauiThing, we are “Stuck on Good,” meaning we’re inspired by good things on Maui: “Maui Things.” This island is beautifully unique, one-of-a-kind and this is what drives our company and allows us to stay motivated and excited about our designs. The Wailuku bridge, Hana, Sam Sato’s, Guri Guri: all are “Maui Things” that we love! To get your MauiThing on go to 7 N. Market Street in Wailuku or call 808-249-0215. ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1608n2

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New York City’s tap water is already widely regarded as world-class, in safety and taste (and subjected to a half-million tests a year by the city’s Department of Environmental Protection). But two entrepreneurs recently opened the Molecule water bar in the city’s East Village, selling 16-ounce bottles of the same water for $2.50, extra-filtered through their $25,000 machine that applies UV rays, ozone treatment and “reverse osmosis� in a seven-stage process to create what they call “pure H2O.� The owners of Molecule are a restaurateur/art dealer and a “social-justice activist� who is a “former world champion boomerang player,� according to a July Wall Street Journal profile.

CAN’T POSSIBLY BE TRUE In 2011, the Liberty County, Texas home of Joe Bankson and Gena Charlton was raided by sheriff’s deputies, the FBI, state officials and a trailing media crew (alerted by the sheriff), checking out a tip that “25 to 30� children’s bodies were buried on the property. No evidence was found, and in a June 2012 lawsuit for defamation, Bankson and Charlton claim that the sheriff had organized the raid knowing full well that the tipster was a self-described “prophet� who had disclosed that her information came from “Jesus and the [32] angels� who were present with her. The sheriff said he did everything “by the book� and that a judge signed the search warrant confirming “probable cause� to believe that at least one crime (if not 25 to 30) had been committed.

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In July, the online magazine Salon profiled Virtuous Pedophiles–an effort by two notably articulate men who insist that their sexual fascination with children would never extend to personal contact. Said one (who claims “advanced degrees from prestigious universities�): “We do not choose to be attracted to children [but] we can resist the temptation to abuse children sexually.� He added, curiously, that “many� of the Virtuous Pedophiles “present no danger to children whatsoever.� Lamented the group’s co-founder, “Almost any group in the world can hold a convention, look out on a sea of faces, and say, ‘These are people like me,’� but because pedophiles are treated with such scorn, “we can’t.�

DEMOCRACY FOLLIES North Carolina state Rep. Becky Carney, an environmental activist, inadvertently cast the deciding vote in July to open up natural-gas hydraulic fracking in the state. The legislature had passed the bill earlier, but it was vetoed by Gov. Bev Perdue, and the House needed exactly 72 votes to override the veto and enact the bill. Carney’s tireless lobbying of colleagues appeared to have helped halt the overriders at 71 votes, but when it came time to push the buttons, Carney accidentally became the 72nd. She could

be heard on her microphone in the chamber, saying, “Oh my gosh. I pushed green.�

IT’S JUST POLITICS Mark Schimel told reporters in Albany, N.Y., in May that it was nothing personal that caused him to run for the Republican nomination to the state assembly from Nassau County–where the incumbent is his estranged wife, Democrat Michelle Schimel. Mark’s mother seemed quite upset at her son. “I can’t believe he’d do a thing like this [to Michelle],� she told a reporter. “I’m going to talk to him.�

DEMOCRACY FOLLIES (INTERNATIONAL VERSION) In March in Ireland, Bundoran Town Councilor Florence Doherty became exasperated with colleague Michael McMahon, who opposed a bill to strengthen whistleblowers’ rights. “[T]his country doesn’t need whistleblowers,� McMahon said. Doherty replied, “Of course it does, you asshole.� In a later radio interview, Doherty repeated her wordof-the-day four times. And in a live TV debate in July, Mohammed Shawabka, a member of the Jordanian parliament, became enraged when his opponent, Mansour Seif-Eddine Murad, called him a secret Israeli agent. Shawabka removed a shoe and hurled it at Murad, who ducked, but then Shawabka pulled a silver pistol from his waistband and waved it around (though no shots were fired).

LEADING ECONOMIC INDICATOR The median annual per-capita income in the New York City borough of the Bronx is about $18,000. In the adjacent borough of Manhattan, as the New York Post reported in May, a resident of a certain condominium on East 11th Street was about to pay over 50 times that amount just for a parking space. The space is a deluxe one, though: about 12 feet by 23 feet by 15 feet high, meaning that it can be configured to store more than one car.

LEAST COMPETENT CRIMINALS James Allan, 28, was sentenced to three years in prison in Oxford, England, in July for robbing a news shop. Allan’s getaway was delayed when he insisted, repeatedly, on pushing the front door open when he obviously should have been pulling. Finally, exasperated, he yanked off his balaclava, exposing his face to the surveillance camera, kicked the door, breaking the glass, and escaped. Police arrested him about three hours later nearby. (The 2000 British movie Snatch featured just such a memorable scene of push/pull helplessness.) ■chuck@mauitime.com To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1608n3

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AUGUST 9, 2012

9

W

hen you don’t vote, you have no voice. There’s no truer statement in a democracy. Sure, we can bitch and moan about the influence of money in political elections, or the stranglehold “special interests” have over our legislatures or even the moral and intellectual bankruptcy of most candidates, but when it comes down to it, unless we actually punch holes in a ballot, we’re just kidding ourselves. Voting requires work, effort and, above all, coherent thought. It also requires good candidates, and like most years, we’re not looking at a bumper crop. Unless you’re happy just voting along with some slate mailer, finding good candidates is never easy. There are candidates below who clearly look at the state of affairs on Maui at the moment–the drive to build massive residential developments without clear water sources or commercial projects without regard to traffic impacts, the virtually unchecked power of the Maui Police and Liquor Control Departments, the poor performance of students in our state’s public schools, etc.–and promise nothing that will change any of it. There are others deeply troubled by this problems, and sincerely wish to help. And there are still other candidates whose mere presence in the election is pretty insulting. So here’s our take on them (as well as a brief rundown on races that aren’t actually races). And if we happen to seem a bit mean at times, then good. The last people we should baby are those who want power. If you need any additional information on the election or where you actually vote, go to Hawaii. gov/elections.

Twinkie join his parents in tree,” Roco wrote next to the photos. OK, who’s going to vote against the man who rescued Pickles and Twinkie? Anyone heartless enough to say no to the guy gave those two little birdies a second chance? We didn’t think so.

U.S. Senate, Democrat

U.S. Senate, Republican

Mazie Hirono

John P. Roco

This one’s pretty clear-cut. Mazie Hirono has been in office since 2006, and seems to be doing a fine job. She’s very liberal, yes, but it’s clear her ideology is something she actually believes, rather than just a coat she puts on to appease the voters. While we like Ed Case–his sponsoring a bill while still a state House member back in 1995 to stop the Hawaii Supreme Court from nominating Bishop Estate trustees was an act of political bravery seldom seen anywhere–he’s simply too conservative. It’s just too hard to forgive the guy for supporting the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan while he sat in Congress from 2003 to 2006. The other candidates (Michael D. Gillespie, Antonio Gimbernat, Arturo Pacheco (Art) Reyes) are non-entities.

10 AUGUST 9, 2012

Man, this one was tough. Let’s start with John Carroll, a hard right-winger who’s been endorsed by the notorious historical revisionist Ken Conklin. Next! Then there’s Charles Augustine Collins, about whom we could discover next to nothing. Next! Oh wait, former Hawaii Governor Linda Lingle is also running–in fact, she’s heavily favored to win the nomination. Next! Then there’s business guy Eddie Pirkowski who told Honolulu Civil Beat that if elected he’ll push for a flat tax, more drone strikes, and is just itching to gut the Affordable Care Act. Next! That leaves John P. Roco, a psychological counselor on Oahu. His campaign website (johnroco.com) doesn’t have much in the way of political issues per se, but it does have pictures of two very cute little birds called Pickles and Twinkie. “Summer 2011 we rescued two baby birds, later letting Pickles free, and

U.S. House of Representatives, Second District, Democrat Tulsi Gabbard Here’s another tough race. Given the massive name recognition enjoyed by former Honolulu Mayor Mufi Hannemann, you’d think he’d have this race locked up. But he doesn’t. Which is good, because Hannemann’s too pro-tourism industry and anti-same-sex marriage for our tastes, and he still comes off way too thug-like in debates. Trial lawyer Rafael Del

Castillo is pushing for more health care reform but he lacks political experience. Esther Kia‘aina is a solid liberal with too much political experience: notably, her current and former, respectively, roles as Office of Hawaiian Affairs Chief Advocate and Kamehameha Schools land manager. Miles Shiratori’s 2010 website touting his gubernatorial run is sadly easier to find than his current website. And Bob Marx is a Hawaii Island environmental attorney who shares Kia‘aina’s progressive ideology. Marx and Kia’aina are great candidates, but we’re going with Honolulu Councilmember Tulsi Gabbard Tamayo. Supported by EMILY’s List (which backs pro-choice women) and the Sierra Club, she also stepped out of dad state Senator Mike Gabbard’s gay-baiting shadow by unequivocally telling us (via Twitter!) that she personally supports same-sex marriage, which we view as a human right.

U.S. House of Representatives, Second District, Republican

liberal, capable and by all accounts very popular in his district, which is difficult to represent given that it includes East Maui, Lanai, Molokai and Kaho‘olawe. It helps him that his opponent, Barbara J. Haliniak, is a Molokai business woman who put out ambiguous and dull campaign materials.

State House, District 9, Democrat

State House, District 10, Democrat

Gil Keith-Agaran

Angus McKelvey

Wow, we really seem to like incumbents this year. Gil Keith-Agaran is as establishment as they come, having in the past run the Maui County Public Works Department, the state Department of Labor and Industrial Relations and chaired the Board of Land & Natural Resources, but he still seems outside the system. He’s well-read, thoughtful, nearly always on Twitter (and not just to share how he just voted on this or that, but to offer his

Kawika Crowley Kawika Crowley is without a doubt the most interesting and dynamic candidate running for any office in the state of Hawaii. Seriously. His resume is a mile long. He’s an advertising consultant, Tea Party member, stand-up comedian, radio DJ, co-author of the classic song “Hawaii 78,” record label-owner, author, TV host, single parent and Hilo resident. Oh, and on his campaign website (kawika4congress.com), under the list labeled “Interests & Hobbies,” he included “sensitive ladies.” That alone should catapult this guy into office. Keep in mind though that Crowley is very conservative, though he does believe women who are raped should have access to abortions. It definitely helps Crowley’s case that his opponent, Matthew DeGeronimo, is a boring mergers and acquisitions guy who lives in Hawaii Kai and was recently named one of Hawaii Business Mag’s “20 For The Next 20.”

State Senate, District 7, Democrat J. Kalani English J. Kalani English has held this office since 2000, but we don’t think you should hold that against him. The Hana resident is a principled

actual takes on books, Giants games, etc.) and votes his conscience. Even though he’s the incumbent, he feels like the outsider against termed-out Maui County Councilman Joe Pontanilla, who has a made a very successful career out of doing exactly what the big land developers want him to do.

Yes, we’re endorsing a guy who has a Sugar Cane Train locomotive named after him. Angus McKelvey has been in office since 2006, and he’s really grown into an effective legislator who genuinely wants to do well for his district by bringing more clean energy and high-tech industries to Maui and Hawaii. As for his opponent, Edward H. Kaahui, he wants to fix the road to Lahaina so we can have more development at Kaanapali, Pulelehua, etc. We need better roads in and out of the Westside, sure, but to serve the current population.

CANDIDATES TO IGNORE

A

large number of races this primary election are uncontested–just one member of a party decided to run for a given nomination, not enough people stepped up to run in a council district or simply no one bothered to challenge an incumbent. That happened a lot this year. Seriously: no one wanted to take on Councilman Mike White? Or State Representative Joe Souki? Are they that powerful and/or beloved? But we digress. Here are all the candidates automatically headed to the November general election (those in bold are running unopposed, and are basically already reelected): • Heath Beasley (U.S. Senate Nonpartisan) • Shan Tsutsui (State Senate District 5 Democrat) • Roz Baker (State Senate District 6 Democrat) • Bart Mulvihill (State Senate District 6 Republican) • Kanohowailuku Helm (State Senate District 7 Nonpartisan) • Joe Souki (State House District 8) • Chayne M. Marten (State House District 10 Republican) • George R. Fontaine (State House District 11 Republican) • Kyle T. Yamashita (State House District 12 Democrat) • Ekolu Kalama (State House District 12 Republican) • Mele Carroll (State House District 13 Democrat) • Simon S. Russell (State House District 13 Republican) • Bob Carroll (Maui County Council, East Maui) • Elle Cochran (Maui County Council, West Maui) • Mike White (Maui County Council, Makawao-Haiku-Paia) • Riki Hokama (Maui County Council, Lanai) • Gladys Baisa (Maui County Council, Upcountry) • Richard Pohle (Maui County Council, Upcountry) • Don Couch (Maui County Council, South Maui) • Alana Kay (Maui County Council, South Maui) • Wilson Manuwai Peters (Maui County Council, Molokai) • Stacy Helm Crivello (Maui County Council, Molokai)

State House, District 11, Democrat Colin E. Hanlon First, the people we’re not endorsing. Joseph Bertram III held his job from 2006 to 2010. He was a nice guy, but not particularly effective and should just stay retired. He means well, but (at least in his emails to MauiTime) he seemed to have trouble writing declarative sentences. While Netra Halperin, a social worker, actually wrote a cover story for MauiTime last year on homelessness on Maui, she couldn’t articulate why she was running for office, either on the recent Akaku televised candidate forum or in a one-on-one interview with MauiTime. Kaniela Ing is a good kid who’s popular with the crowd outraged over the upcoming Kihei Mega Malls, but he’s still too new to the game. Colin E. Hanlon, the executive director of the Boys & Girls Club of Maui, is different from the rest. He has both solid administrative experience and good community credentials. We only wish there were Hanlons in a few more races this season...

AUGUST 9, 2012

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Walter Ritte

No Endorsement

Sigh. Alan (Al) Fukuyama is a small businessman who failed to win County Council seat representing Lahaina in 2008 and 2010, and is now trying his luck at this open seat. We think he should try something else entirely. Don S. Guzman is an attorney and former prosecutor who has lined up backing from the island’s political powerhouses. In fact, Mayor Alan Arakawa, planner Chris Hart, planning firm Frampton & Ward, former Prosecuting Attorney Ben Acob, current county Finance Director Danny Agsalog, consultant firm Araki-Regan & Associates, developer Stanford Carr and builder Chad Goodfellow have all donated money to his campaign. Guzman’s your guy if you you like the way Maui is developing. We don’t, so he’s not. As for Erin R. McLaughlin, he taught special education at Baldwin for 11 years, worked for the TSA and then tried to open a jet ski rental business in Makena but was apparently blocked by the permitting process. We’ll just pass on the whole lot.

The Office of Hawaiian Affairs is one of those background institutions that most people have heard of but few can explain. OHA administers community grants and low interest loans to Kanaka Maoli seeking a better life. The office also lobbies the legislature. There are a variety of candidates running for the at large seat, but only one clear choice. Haunani Apoliona is the incumbent trustee. Keli‘i Akina is a minister. Cal Lee is a former assistant coach at the University of Hawaii. Lancelot Haili Lincoln is a bit of a mystery–even the League of Women Voters didn’t have any information on him in their exhaustive candidate rundown, though they did have a picture of him wearing a jaunty hat. Keali‘i J. Makekau is a condo site manager in Honolulu. Then there’s Walter Ritte. He helped found OHA back in the 1970s, and served on its first board of trustees. But these days he’s a wild card (and he has the criminal convictions to prove it). He’ll bring life to the OHA board in ways no one can really predict. ■

Mike Victorino is still the incumbent, and still (Dodger!) Shane Victorino’s dad, and for a lot of people on Maui, that’s enough. Victorino always struck as someone who ran for office because of what he could be, rather than what he could do. The problem here is that his opponents are even worse. Joseph G. Blackburn III is a former firefighter and police officer who seems sincere, but has made campaign statements that make us question his priorities. Like this one, from his website (blackburn4council.com): “Stream water use for agricultural and the accompanying ditch system needs to be supported. We must support [Hawaiian Commercial & Sugar] HC&S. in their bid for survival if we are to realize our dream of electrical self-sufficiency.” As for right-wing ideologue Lisa R. Gapero (married to LC Investigator Pedro Gapero), we’re just going to say no and move on.

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Food & Drink

Gourmet Burgers Rise Mainland chain Fatburger opens its first Hawaii location in Pukalani BY JEN RUSSO

Friendly service at Fatburger

Fatburger Pukalani Terrace Shopping Center 55 Pukalani St. 808-573-2159

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wo years before Ray Croc began selling the world’s most famous corporate fast food burger, Lovey Yancey created the Fatburger, a gourmet burger counter restaurant franchise that was years before its time. Now that trendy, fancy burgers are all the rage, Fatburger reigns supreme in its Southern California origins–even with plenty of new kids

$10.69. That includes a medium burger, a choice of Fat or Skinny Fries and a drink with free refills (adding cheese costs 69 cents and extras like guacamole and bacon are just 99 cents). Fatburger also has a “Happy Hour” that runs from 4pm to 6pm daily in which you can buy a medium or large burger meal and get a medium burger for free. “I want people to come here all the time,” says Abarro. “I hired local Upcountry folks that would care about this place. I am working really hard to keep the pricing competitive so folks can get a great burger here. We have an open kitchen so you can see right moving in on the gourmet burger gig. in and see how it’s Fast forward to Pukalani in 2012. It’s here made fresh. It’s a simple menu, but that Hawaii got its first Fatburger joint. The it’s high quality ingredients.” recipe for the burgers hasn’t changed since Abarro has changed the scene Lovey started the business 60 years ago. at the sleepy upcountry Foodland Their patties are fresh ground chuck sirloin strip mall with his new eatery. beef. The toppings are also what they are The casual counter order burger known for–mustard, relish, pickles, chopped joint features great jazz and blues onions, fresh sliced tomato and shredded on its speakers–tunes that Yancey lettuce are all part of “the works” package. was into when she first created If you want a few extras like bacon, mushthe brand, and the franchises room, egg, cheese, chili or guac, they have continue to embrace that. Abarro that too for a buck or so more. has taken that concept one step Don’t worry about the price though. In further by offering live music on fact, owner Ernie Abarro says he just dropped Friday at dinnertime and on Satthe price on the Fatburger meal deal to urdays at lunchtime in the outdoor dining area. This Friday, for instance, slack key guitarist Cindy Combs will play from 5 to 8pm. Depending on how hungry you are, patty size counts. Fatburger offers a small 2.5 ounce patty, a third-pound patty (medium) and a halfpound patty (large). If your appetite can handle it, they have the XXL and the XXXL that doubles and triples the half-pound patties on your bun. For real burger enthusiasts, Fatburger has the XXXL Challenge: if you can eat the entire thing inside the restaurant (it’s a pound and a half of beef), then Double cheeseburger your photo goes on the

wall and you go home with a certificate to prove you did it. These aren’t just large burgers, either. Their great taste has a lot to do with their breadto-meat-to-vegetable ratio. Their proprietary buns are designed to hold the size of the meat just right. They don’t get soggy, but they don’t overpower the juicy patty with a mouthful of billowy bread. Fatburger has scrumptious sides too. Their fries come in just one size, but two kinds, Skinny or Fat. The Fat steak fries are off the hook, and have less sodium than skinny versions. You can also add chili and cheese to your fries. Their onion rings are made fresh on site, where they batter and fry them crisp. Hot dogs, chicken fingers, BLT, turk-veggie burgers and sausage and egg sandwiches

Roselani ice cream milkshake

round out their menu. For kids they have a meal for $5.79 with fries and drinks with burger, chicken strips and hot dog options. For a sweet finish, Roselani ice cream shakes come in five flavors: banana, cookies and cream, vanilla, chocolate and strawberry, all topped with a generous dose of whipped cream. They also have root beer floats and fountain drinks. The Fatburger Pukalani is off to a great start on Maui, so much so the company is opening another location at Pearl Harbor on Oahu. ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso

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Picks

BY MEGAN HAZEN

FRIDAY, AUG.10 LAHAINA SECOND FRIDAY TOWN PARTY – As the sun sets and Lahaina cools down a bit, the party along Front Street heats up. Enjoy a warm summer night in Lahaina this Friday at their Second Friday Town Party. Opening with an ‘Ulalena cast performance at the sea wall, this Friday will offer all the live music, art, food and fun we’ve come to expect from Second Fridays. Entertainment will include Willie K at Kimo’s from 9-11pm, Visibly Shaken, Gary Larson, Evan Shulman and Bob Jones & The Drive. You can also do a sunset sail with Gemini Charters featuring live music, Hawaiian storytelling, pupus and beer from Maui Brewing Co. So come out, wind down and enjoy the final stretch of summer. Free. 6-9pm. Front Street, Lahaina; mauifridays.com/lahaina.

ART NIGHT IN LAHAINA – Friday night, Lahaina galleries will open their doors to the Second Friday crowd and feed the masses with light pupus, fine art, music and conversation. Gallery 505 will feature world-famous New Impressionist Sam Park and some of his never-before-seen works. DJ Scotty D will be spinning at Peter Lik Gallery, where guests can also enjoy wine and light pupus. Lahaina Galleries will host guest artist Dario Campanile. Other participating galleries include Maui Hands, Images Fine Art Gallery, Longhi’s Artisan Fair, Bernard Passman Gallery and Sargents Fine Art. Free. Front Street, Lahaina; mauifridays.com/lahaina.

FRIDAY, AUG.10 CONCERT IN THE PARK – Enjoy a concert for a cause in Campbell Park during Lahaina’s Second Friday Town Party. Ron Hetteen, Damon Parrillo and Keali’i Lum will be playing live Hawaiian music in the park from 5-7:30pm. The park will also be the place to grab some local food, baked goods and desserts. Concerts in the Park are put on by the LahainaTown Action Committee in partnership with participating Lahaina restaurants, and benefit West Side keiki non-profits, including Waiola Church, Lahaina Canoe Club – Keiki Program, Boys & Girls Club of Maui, Lahaina Club, Na Ki`a i O Waine`e, Lahaina Swim Club and Soroptimist International of West Maui. Free. 5-8pm. Campbell Park, Lahaina (across from the Pioneer Inn); mauifridays.com/lahaina.

LAHAINATOWN HISTORY COMES ALIVE – Second Friday in Lahaina has a lot to offer culture-wise. You can watch the 90-minute documentary Finding Sandalwood Mountain at the Wo Hing Museum. The film “examines the lives of men like Chun Ah Fong (Hawaii’s Chinese Merchant Prince), Sun Yat Sen (the Father of Modern China) and Hiram Fong (the first Asian U.S. Senator).” Or you can catch a 20-minute surf film on the Baldwin Home lawn that features surfers Rell Sunn, Clyde Aikau, Rabbit Kekai, Buffalo Keaulana and Alvin Ka’io. The surfers share their knowledge on the beginning of surfing, different styles of surfing and more. Free. Finding: 6pm, Wo Hing Museum; Surf: 7:30pm, Baldwin Home Museum. Both located on Front Street, Lahaina; lahainarestoration.org.

FRIDAY, AUG.10 BENGALI & THE LAMBSBREAD – Celebrate Hawaiian reggae artists at Stella Blues this Friday! Bengali, lead singer of reggae band InnaVision for six years, is now enjoying a solo career under the moniker Bengali & The BottomLess Tree. But Roots reggae group The Lambsbread is also performing. The Lambsbread formed on Kauai a decade ago, and band members describe their sound as “modern reggae rooted in Jamaican influences, with a hip-hop & R&B feel to it.” The Lambsbread is made up of lead singer Kaya, female vocalist Nadia and other Hawaiian reggae artists. They’re working on their fourth album now, and have released a few singles off of it including “Long Trod.” Praise be to Jah. $15. 10pm. Stella Blues Cafe (1279 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-874-3779.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HONU – Mark and Judy Ellman are celebrating one great year at their newest gorgeous Lahaina location with 40 percent off your bill from 11am to 3pm and after 4:30pm. Highlights for your tastebuds include amazing baked goods from Chef Elizabeth McDonald and contemporary Mediterranean inspired menu items with plenty of fresh seafood, East Coast style like po’ boys. Through Aug. 15. (1295 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-9390; honumaui.com.

SATURDAY, AUG. 11 COBBLING WORKSHOP – There’s only one way to ensure that your moccasins were made for walking: make them yourself! Join shoe maven Teri Edmonds at her Wailuku store, If The Shoe Fits, for a two-day workshop that will result in a pair of moccasins made from your own blood, sweat and tears (cobbling is a very intense process). Edmonds’ Maui Shoe Academy is Maui’s only school for shoe design and repair. As they say, if the shoe fits, you made it correctly. $350. Aug 11 and 25, 11am-4pm. If The Shoe Fits (21 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-249-9710; teriedmonds.com.

MICKEY AVALON – There’s no shame in his game. Mickey Avalon, Los Angeles rapper and global bad-boy sensation, is Mr. Right. He sports guyliner, tats, a fake Rolex and, rarely, a shirt. He raps about the glitz of the Hollywood lifestyle, and in his song “So Rich So Pretty,” he says his dream girl is a rich, bulimic, coke addict. And his song “Stroke Me”... well, it’s self-explanatory. Love him or hate him, the guy is one-of-a-kind. You can see him perform at the MACC this Saturday (mature audiences only). $25 (reserved seats), $35 (pit access). 8pm. Castle Theater, Maui Arts & Cultural Center (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; mauiarts.org.

SATURDAY, AUG. 11 HOPE BALL – The American Cancer Society (ACS) presents their first annual gala, the Hope Ball: A Small World, A Big Purpose. Guests will enjoy gourmet food, live entertainment (including throwback band Deja Vu and Hawaiian/pop/reggae artist Alika Nako’oka), silent and live auctions and dancing. The night will honor Mana’olana award recipient Bobby C. Baker, M.D., a leader in cancer treatment on Maui. The ACS will use the funds from this gala to support cancer research, education, advocacy and services. Join them in the worldwide fight against cancer. $150 each, tables available. 5pm. Grand Wailea Hotel Resort and Spa (3850 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-244-5554; HopeBallMaui.org.

FOUR-COURSE DINNER AT THE HUI – The Hui No’eau is a great place to feast your eyes–whether on the beautiful grounds or on the artwork lining the walls. Now for one night, it’s a great place to actually feast. This Saturday, don’t miss your chance to support the Hui and enjoy a gourmet meal. Chef Bev Gannon is catering, so you know it’ll be extra-tasty, and Jim Powlan from Chambers & Chambers will skillfully pair wines. Your taste buds are in good hands. Call for details and reservations. $200/person. Kaluanui Estate (2841 Baldwin Ave., Makawao); 808-572-6560 x26.

SATURDAY, AUG. 11 KEALIA SUMMER OPENING – Learn about the Wildlife Refuge System at Maui’s own protected wetland, Kealia Pond, while celebrating the Pond’s summer opening this Saturday. Visitors can watch the 11-minute film “America’s National Wildlife Refuge System: Where Wildlife Comes First.” Then enjoy a talk by Sonny Gamponia: “Kealia Pond National Wildlife Refuge: Wetland Wonders,” at the visitor center. Kealia Pond relies on the hard work and dedication of volunteers, so be sure to thank them when you see them. Free. 8am-3pm. Kealia Pond National Wildlife Refuge Visitor Center and Kanuimanu Ponds Viewing Area, (Milepost 6, Mokulele Hwy., Kihei); 808-875-1582.

SATURDAY, AUG. 11 WILD DOLPHIN DAYS – Dolphins are the whole package. Not only are they so cute, they’re smart, too! Here’s a chance to show your appreciation of these sea critters by sculpting them out of sand with the Pacific Whale Foundation this Saturday. The contest is part of Wild Dolphin Days, an annual celebration of Maui’s wild dolphins. The best sand dolphin artists will win prizes, and all participants will get a free Wild Dolphin Guide and poster. Free. 9am12pm. North end of Keawakapu Beach on the sand by Sarento’s Restaurant, (South Kihei Road); 808-249-8811; pacificwhale.org.

SPAMST SPAMSTRUCTION COMPETITION! – Hale Mahaolu is celebrating their 45th anniversary at the mall this Saturday. They’ll be hosting a SPAMstruction competition and Heal Health Fair (coordinated by the Maui Adult Daycare Center). The SPAMstruction competiti competition will showcase the skills and creativity of three Key Clubs from Maui high schools, and a the winning club will receive $1,500 for their school’s Project Graduation fund. While Wh sculpting objects out of Spam is probably the healthiest thing you can do with the popular p meat product, all this is a reminder that we must never underestimate the power of Spam. Free. 10am-1pm. Queen Kaahumanu Center (275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-3369; queenkaahumanucenter.com.

SUNDAY, AUG. 12 THE SHIRELLES & THE MANHATTANS – The Shirelles and The Manhattans are performing at the MACC’s Castle Theater. The Shirelles are the original girl group and gained popularity in the 1960s with their hit “Will You Love Me Tomorrow” and have had many hits since, including “Mama Said” and “I Met Him on a Sunday.” The Manhattans are an all-male vocal R&B/soul group who formed at the same time. A few of their most popular songs are “Shining Star,” “Kiss And Say Goodbye,” and “I Wanna Be (Your Everything).” $29-69. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, Maui Arts & Cultural Center (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org.

AUGUST 9, 2012 17

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Film

The Campaign New Will Ferrell film is a breath of fresh (political) air BY BARRY WURST II

The Campaign ★★★★★ Rated R / 85 Min.

R

ecommending The Campaign to audiences is like telling a dirty joke in a crowded room. You nervously hope people will find it as funny as you did, even if the joke in question is cheap, off-color and completely tasteless. Will Ferrell stars as Cam Brady, a dim-witted, womanizing, and utterly insincere democratic candidate running for congress. Brady is a career-politician who enjoys the power and showmanship of stumping for causes more than following through on any of the issues he raises. On the other hand, Marty Huggins, played by Zach Galifianakis, is a sincere but strange family man who runs against Brady on the republican ticket, despite being entirely out of his league. Huggins is being used as a political puppet by the powerful Motch brothers, played by John Lithgow and Dan Aykroyd as the same kind of crooked, rich old white men Ralph

Bellamy and Don Ameche portrayed in Trading Places. Huggins has an unexpected advantage in a shadow figure (played to the hilt with straight faced intensity by Dylan McDermott) who secretly instructs him how to be a fierce, unpredictable and successful opponent. Even though it’s hit and miss, the movie wants you to laugh, does everything in its power to get you laughing and piles the jokes high, at the expense of good taste at every turn. Playing like an R-rated political cartoon, The Campaign is as outrageous and hilarious as Bulworth but lacks that film’s intelligence and fresh satire. The running joke here is that no amount of backstabbing, double-crossing, and deception is too low for Brady or Huggins, who both do absolutely anything to win. Sadly, the movie only feels slightly ahead of its time, as some of the bizarre, perverse turn of events that take place seem weirdly plausible in today’s world of politics-as-entertainment. There’s something novel about an R-rated, foul mouthed, take-no-prisoners political roast, which goes for the throat while other recent comedies about politics, like Man of

A fun to watch comedy

the Year, tend to be gentle and forgettable. Director Jay Roach is a comedy veteran who helmed Meet the Parents and all of the Austin Powers films; his last film, Dinner For Schmucks, ran out of steam before it even got to the dinner of the title. Here, the first two acts are the strongest and crammed with one obscene gut buster after another, leading to an ending that works but seems like the screenwriters have finally run out of ideas. It’s over-plotted and mean spirited at times, as everyone on screen is a target waiting to be skewered. Gags ranging from an infant being punched to a horrific snake bite taking on epic proportion are the sort of fiendishly naughty and downright filthy jokes the audience is in for. A running gag involving Brady’s children having a surprising taste in music and Huggins’ dogs becoming unwanted in their home had me howling. So did Ferrell and Galifiankis, who can be one-note in lesser vehicles, but

here give robust comic turns with surprising amounts of humanity. Even when they both sink as low as they can go, Brady and Huggins are likeable, if completely crazy figures whose wicked game of one-upmanship remains engagingly twisted the entire movie. The rest of the cast is in great form, such as a never funnier Jason Sudeikis, finally landing a role worthy of his Saturday Night Live career. Lithgow and Aykroyd, together on screen for the first time since Twilight Zone–The Movie, are fun to watch, even in hammy villain roles like these and Brian Cox has some amusing moments as Huggins’ disapproving father. At the center of it all is Ferrell and Galifianakis, gleefully mocking every political cliché in the book. Between now and November, this movie feels like a needed breath of fresh air. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1608f

AUGUST 9, 2012 19

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Film

Showtimes

WHERE AND WHEN TO WATCH WHAT BY JENNA SCHAMBER

FRONT STREET THEATER

KUKUI MALL

900 Front Street, Lahaina, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: M-F until 6:30pm, Sa-Su until 3:30pm, Discount Tue)

1819 S. Kihei Rd., 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm)

Hope Springs-PG13-THU (4:15), 7:00, 9:30. FRI (1:20, 4:15), 7:00, 9:30. SAT-SUN (1:20), 4:15, 7:00, 9:30. MON-TUE (4:15), 7:00, 9:30. Step Up Revolution-PG13-THU (3:45), 6:55, 9:15. FRI (1:15, 3:45), 6:55, 9:15. SAT-SUN (1:15), 3:45, 6:55, 9:15. MON-TUE (3:45), 6:55, 9:15. The Campaign-R-FRI (1:20, 4:00), 7:05, 9:35. SAT-SUN (1:20), 4:00, 7:05, 9:35. MON-TUE (4:00), 7:05, 9:35. The Watch-R-THU (4:00), 7:05, 9:35. Total Recall-PG13-THU (4:20), 7:00, 9:45. FRI (1:30, 4:20), 7:00, 9:35. SAT-SUN (1:30), 4:20, 7:00, 9:35. MON-TUE (4:20), 7:00, 9:35.

The Bourne Legacy-PG13-FRI-SAT 11:00, 1:55, 4:50, 7:50, 10:30. SUN 11:00, 1:55, 4:50, 7:50. MON-TUE 12:45, 3:40, 6:30, 9:20. The Campaign-R-FRI-SAT 11:10, 1:15, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30, 9:30. SUN 11:10, 1:15, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30. MON-TUE 1:15, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30. The Dark Knight Rises-PG13-THU 1:05, 2:00, 4:30, 5:30, 8:00, 9:00. FRI-SAT 11:30, 3:00, 7:00, 10:20. SUN 11:30, 3:00, 7:00. MON-TUE 1:05, 4:30, 8:00. The Watch-R-THU 1:00, 3:40, 6:00, 8:20. Total Recall-PG13-THU 1:15, 3:45, 6:20, 8:50. FRI-SAT 11:15, 1:50, 4:30, 7:00, 9:45. SUN 11:15, 1:50, 4:30, 7:00. MON-TUE 1:00, 3:45, 6:20, 8:50.

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, Kahului. 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm)

Brave-PG-FRI-SAT 11:10, 9:15. SUN-TUE 11:00. Ice Age: Continental Drift-PG-FRI-TUE 12:00, 2:20, 4:45, 7:10. Step Up Revolution-PG13-THU 11:30, 12:30, 2:00, 3:00, 4:30, 6:00, 7:10, 8:30, 9:25. FRISAT 1:15, 3:30, 5:45, 8:00, 10:15. SUN-TUE 1:15, 3:30, 5:45, 8:00. Step Up Revolution 3D-P G13-F R I-W E D 2:00, 7:00. The Bourne Legacy-PG13-FRI-SAT 11:00, 12:30, 2:00, 3:30, 5:00, 7:00, 8:00, 9:50, 10:50. SUN-TUE 11:00, 12:30, 2:00, 3:30, 5:00, 7:00, 8:00. Total Recall-PG13-FRI-SAT 11:15, 12:15, 1:50, 2:50, 4:25, 5:25, 7:20, 8:20, 9:50, 10:45. SUN-TUE 11:15, 12:15, 1:50, 2:50, 4:25, 5:25, 7:20, 8:20.

Maui Mall, Kahului, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: M-Th until 6pm, F-Su until 3:30pm)

The Amazing Spider-Man-PG13-THU (3:25), 6:45, 9:45. FRI (12:15, 3:25), 6:45, 9:45. SAT-SUN (12:15, 3:25), 6:45, 9:45. MON-TUE (3:25), 6:45, 9:45. Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days-PG-THU (2:00, 2:30, 4:20, 4:50), 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 9:20. FRI (11:40, 12:10, 2:00, 2:30, 4:20, 4:50), 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 9:20. SAT-SUN (11:40, 12:10, 2:00, 2:30), 4:20, 4:50, 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 9:20. MON-TUE (2:00, 2:30, 4:20, 4:50), 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 9:20. Hope Springs-PG13-THU (2:20, 4:45), 7:15, 9:40. FRI (12:00, 2:20, 4:45), 7:15, 9:40. SATSUN (12:00, 2:20), 4:45, 7:15, 9:40. MON-TUE (2:20, 4:45), 7:15, 9:40. Ice Age: Continental Drift-PG-THU 11:00, 1:15, 3:25, 5:35, 8:00. Moonrise Kingdom-PG13-THU (1:45, 3:55), 6:15, 8:50. FRI (11:35, 1:45, 3:55), 6:15, 8:50. SAT-SUN (11:35, 1:45), 3:55, 6:15, 8:50. MONTUE (1:45, 3:55), 6:15, 8:50.

NOW PLAYING THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN - PG13 - Action - Action/Comic - Yes, they’re remaking a movie that came out barely 10 years ago. But who cares? If you miss this one, don’t worry, because they’ll probably just remake it again next year. 136 min. BRAVE - PG - Animation - Some Scottish

Hope Springs opening this week

NEW THIS WEEK THE BOURNE LEGACY - PG13 - Action/Adventure - In this Matt Damon-less incarnation of Robert Ludlum’s spy novel, Jeremy Renner plays super-assassin Aaron Cross. 135 min. THE CAMPAIGN - R - Comedy - Will Ferrell

and Zach Galifianakis star in this humorous take on a congressional campaign. See this week’s film critique. 85 min. HOPE SPRINGS - PG13 - Comedy/Drama

- It’s marriage counseling time for a couple (Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones) who’ve been hitched for 30 years. 100 min.

redhead uses courage and archery to undo a curse or something. 93 min. THE DARK KNIGHT RISES - PG13 - Action -

Christian Bale returns as the Batman to fight the menacing mercenary Bane (Tom Hardy) and Catwoman (Ann Hathaway) in this last installment of Christopher Nolan’s trilogy. 164 min. DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: DOG DAYS - PG - Family/Comedy - Greg has big plans for his summer vacation, but then everything goes haywire. Based on the popular teen books. 94 min. ICE AGE: CONTINENTAL DRIFT - PG - Ani-

mation - Your old friends Manny, Diego and Sid set sail on an iceberg and meet exciting sea creatures and pirates. Of course they do. 94 min. MOONRISE KINGDOM - PG13 - Comedy -

Here’s Wes Anderson’s latest quirky film, on a pair of very young lovers on the run from

Ted-R-THU (2:25, 4:55), 7:25, 9:55. FRI (11:55, 2:25, 4:55), 7:25, 9:55. SAT-SUN (11:55, 2:25), 4:55, 7:25, 9:55. MON-TUE (2:25, 4:55), 7:25, 9:55. The Campaign-R-FRI (12:05, 12:30, 2:15, 2:55, 4:35, 5:15), 7:00, 7:30, 9:15, 9:50. SAT-SUN (12:05, 12:30, 2:15, 2:55), 4:35, 5:15, 7:00, 7:30, 9:15, 9:50. MONTUE (2:15, 2:55, 4:35, 5:15), 7:00, 7:30, 9:15, 9:50. The Dark Knight Rises-PG13-THU (1:30, 3:00, 4:00, 5:00), 6:30, 7:30, 8:30, 10:00. FRI (11:30, 1:30, 3:00, 5:00), 6:30, 8:30, 10:00. SAT-SUN (11:30, 1:30, 3:00), 5:00, 6:30, 8:30, 10:00. MON-TUE (1:30, 3:00, 5:00), 6:30, 8:30, 10:00. The Watch-R-THU (1:40, 2:10, 4:05, 4:40), 6:35, 7:05, 9:10, 9:50. FRI (11:50, 2:10, 4:40), 7:05, 9:35. SAT-SUN (11:50, 2:10), 4:40, 7:05, 9:35. MON-TUE (2:10, 4:40), 7:05, 9:35. Total Recall-PG13-THU 11:00, 12:00 1:40, 2:40, 4:15, 5:15, 7:00, 8:00. Tyler Perry’s: Madea’s Witness ProtectionPG13-THU (1:35, 4:10), 6:50, 9:30. FRI (1:35, 4:10), 6:50, 9:30. SAT-SUN (1:35), 4:10, 6:50, 9:30. MON-TUE (1:35, 4:10), 6:50, 9:30.

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front St., Lahaina, 249-2222 (Matinees: Tue all shows, until 6pm every other day)

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days-PG-THU (1:30, 4:00), 7:00, 9:20. FRI (1:15, 3:45), 6:55, 9:15. SAT-SUN (1:15), 3:45, 6:55, 9:15. MONTUE (1:15, 3:45), 6:55, 9:15. Ice Age: Continental Drift-PG-THU (1:00, 3:35), 6:55. 9:15. The Bourne Legacy-PG13-FRI (1:00, 4:00), 7:00, 10:00. SAT-SUN (1:00), 4:00, 7:00, 10:00. MON-TUE (1:00, 4:00), 7:00, 10:00. The Dark Knight Rises-PG13-THU (11:30, 3:00), 6:30, 10:00. FRI (12:00, 3:15), 6:30, 9:50. SAT-SUN (12:00), 3:15, 6:30, 9:50. MONTUE (12:00, 3:15), 6:30, 9:50.

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Friday

TED - R - Comedy - Mark Wahlberg plays a

guy who’s childhood teddy bear comes alive (and has director Seth MacFarlane’s voice) for some reason. 106 min. TOTAL RECALL - PG13 - Action/Sci-Fi - This remake of the Arnold Schwarzenegger flick, which was based on a Philip K. Dick novel, concerns one Douglas Quaid (Colin Farrell), who tries to take a mental vacation, only to wake up and find everything he knows about himself may have been a lie. 118 min. TYLER PERRY’S: MADEA’S WITNESS PROTECTION - PG13 - Comedy - Madea

Saturday

Tuesday

shelters a Wall Street banker squealing on a mob-backed Ponzi scheme. Sure, happens all the time. 114 min. THE WATCH - R - Comedy - Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn play suburban neighborhood watch guys who find themselves battling an interstellar alien invasion. 101 min.

AUGUST 9, 2012 21

Calendar

Da Kine Calendar BY JENNA SCHAMBER

BIG SHOWS MAUI MUSICAL FESTIVAL - Fri, Aug 10. HawaiiONTV.com and Whole Foods are partnering up for a live music series featuring slack key guitar masters. Free. 11:30am-2pm Whole Foods Market, (70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului); 808872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui MAUI CALLS 2012 - Fri, Aug 10. MACC’s 17th annual signature benefit gala includes an evening of live entertainment, pupus paired with premium wines, a fresh flower lei greeting, and silent & live auctions. 21 and up. $195$500. 6-10pm A&B Amphitheater / Yokouchi Pavilion, MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org BOOM PARTY - Fri, Aug 10. Featuring DJs Sweet Beets and Matt Lane, bikini fashion review by Indie Attire, body painting by Rachel Gonzales, a costume swap, live visuals, and more. $5 cover before 11pm; $10 cover after 11pm. 10pm-1am Casanova, (1188 Makawao Ave.); 808-572-0220; casanovamaui.com THE LAMBSBREAD AND BENGALI & THE BOTTOMLESS TREE - Fri, Aug 10. See picks on p. 17 for info. $15 at door. 10pm Stella Blues, (1279 S. Kihei Rd., # 201); 808874-3779; stellablues.com 2012 HOPE BALL: “A SMALL WORLD, A BIG PURPOSE” - Sat, Aug 11. See picks on p. 17 for info. 5:30pm Grand Wailea Resort and Spa, (3850 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-2445554; hopeballmaui.org CINDY COMBS WITH SPECIAL GUESTS KANOA KUKAUA AND RYAN REGO - Sat, Aug 11. One night only! $10 cover. 7pm Stella Blues, (1279 S. Kihei Rd., # 201); 808-8743779; stellablues.com MICKEY AVALON - Sat, Aug 11. See picks on p. 17 for info. $25 (reserved seats), $35 (access to pit in front of stage). 8-10:30pm Maui Arts & Cultural Center, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org INNA VISON FEATURING TWENTY DAZE - Sat, Aug 11. Cultural Vision Maui presents Inna Vision on their “No Stopping” tour with 83. Also featuring Las Vegas/HI band, For Twenty Daze. Soundsystem by Rambo of Judah. $10. 9pm Three’s Bar & Grill, (1945-G S. Kihei Rd.); 808-8793133; threesbarandgrill.com THE SHIRELLES & THE MANHATTANS - Sun, Aug 12. See picks on p. 17 for info. $29, $39, $49 and a limited no. of $69/VIP (includes premium seating and artist meet-andgreet) plus applicable fees. 7:30pm Castle Theater, MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org WILLIE K AND THE WAREHOUSE BLUES BAND - Tue, Aug 14. Live music. $10 cover. 9pm Casanova, (1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao); 808-572-0220; www.casanovamaui.com

22 AUGUST 9, 2012

SLACK KEY SHOW – MASTERS OF HAWAIIAN MUSIC WITH KEOKI KAHUMOKU & FRIENDS - Wed, Aug 15. George Kahumoku Jr. hosts this Grammy Award-winning concert series featuring Keoki Kahumoku & Friends, Hawaiian music with an old time country flair. Co-hosted by Da Ukulele Boyz, Sterling Seaton and Wainani Kealoha. Doors at 6:45pm. $37.99-78.35; Dinner/show package available with Sea House Restaurant (adjacent to the concert hall; 5:30pm seating). 7:30-9:30pm Napili Kai Beach Resort Aloha Pavilion, (5900 L. Honoapiilani Rd.); 808-669-3858; slackkey. com / napilikai.com

HUI NO’EAU VISUAL ARTS CENTER’S 4-COURSE DINNER & WINE PAIRING Sat, Aug 11. See picks on p. 17 for info. $200 per person. Kaluanui Estate, (2841 Baldwin Ave., Makawao); 808-572-6560 x26

FRIDAY TOWN PARTIES

THE CREATION - Sun, Aug 19. Conducted by Robert E. Wills, this year’s Maui Masterworks Festival concert will assemble a group of more than 130 musicians and singers to perform Franz Joseph Haydn’s “The Creation.” $25 to $45, plus applicable fees. 3:30pm Castle Theater, MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

OCEANSIDE BLOCK PARTY AT LAHAINA SECOND FRIDAY - Highlights include an opening presentation by the cast of ‘Ulalena at the sea wall across from Hard Rock at 6pm, Art Night events at various galleries, Culture & History at the Wo Hing Museum and Baldwin Home, live music and entertainment, foodie specials and a concert in the park. See picks on p. 17 for more info. Free. 6-9pm (Front St.); facebook.com/LahainaTownParties and @LahainaFriday on Twitter. LIVE MUSIC - Hula Rock: Live Hawaiian Music 5-9 p.m. The Shops at 505 Front Street: Music by Gary Larson, Jazz in The Courtyard. Pioneer Inn: Live music 6-9 p.m. Kimo’s: Willie K., 9-11pm (free admission coupons available at the Lahaina Visitor Center to the first 30 people). David Paul’s Island Grill: Live jazz, island, reggae or contemporary guitar. Moose McGillycuddy’s: Visibly Shaken, 9:3011:30pm. Longhi’s: Live jazz overlooking the water, 7-10pm. Hard Rock Cafe: Live music with Evan Shulman from 6-9 p.m., plus “All is One” DJ industry night from 10pm until closing. The Wharf Cinema Center: Live music on center stage, 5-7pm. Captain Jack’s Island Grill: Bob Jones and the Drive, 8-10:30pm. Cool Cat Café: Live music overlooking the Banyan Tree - Johnny Ringo, 7:30-10pm. Free.

STAGE BARE ESSENTIAL THEATER - Mon, Aug 13. “A bare stage, a bunch of talented actors, and a great script.” This month’s reading: The Owl and the Pussycat by Bill Manhoff. Read by: Genie Calagna and Charles Cook. Enjoy refreshments throughout the performance. Free (donations accepted). 6:30pm Iao Theater, (68 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-242-6969; mauionstage.com

FOODIE SATURDAY SUSHI SCHOOL - Sat, Aug 11. Get schooled in sushi at Japengo! Learn from their expert sushi chefs on how to create signature sushi rolls from scratch. Class will include hands-on instruction, sushi tasting, and non-alcoholic beverages. $35 per person. 3-4:30pm Japengo at the Hyatt Regency, (200 Nohea Kai Dr., Lahaina); 808-667-4796; maui.hyatt.com

TICKETS ON SALE 2ND ANNUAL LANA’I SLACK KEY FESTIVAL - Fri, Aug 17 through Sun, Aug 19. 7 venues of slack key, workshops by John Keawe and Hula by Hope Keawe, and Ekolu Kalama. Free. Manele Bay Four Seasons, (Lanai), lanaislackkeyfestival.com

SLACK KEY MASTERS WITH LEDWARD KA‘APANA - Thu, Aug 23. Grammy Award winner George Kahumoku, Jr. opens the show with his musical and storytelling talents. Special guest Led Ka‘apana is known as the Hawaiian “grand master” of stringed instruments, particularly slack key guitar. $25/standard, $45/VIP with artist talk-story session at 6:30 pm. 7:30-10pm MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org JOHN CRUZ SUPPER CLUB - Fri, Aug 24. A 4-course dinner and show featuring music by John Cruz. $30 show, $60 dinner & show. 6pm Stella Blues Cafe, (1279 S. Kihei Rd., # 201); 808-874-3779; stellablues.com AUGIE T’S SUMMER OF LOL WITH JOSE DYNAMITE - Fri, Aug 24. $20/standard, $35/ premium with meet-and-greet. 7:30-10pm MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808242-7469; mauiarts.org CYCLE TO THE SUN - Sat, Aug 25. Cyclists from around the world are invited to compete in a legendary 36-mile uphill race on Maui from beachside Paia to the 10,023foot summit of Haleakala. Entries only taken online. $200 individual entry fee; $300 relay entry fee, a $25 fee is added for entries after Aug. 6. 6:30am-3pm (99 Hana Hwy.); cycletothesun.com; donnie@gocyclingmaui.com 9TH LIFE HAWAII’S NO KILL CONFERENCE - Sat, Aug 25. Nathan Winograd, keynote speaker and outspoken leader of the No Kill Revolution, will hold a multi-media presentation followed by a book signing. Lunch will be served at noon, followed by guest speakers Diana Blankenburg and Ryan Clinton. $50 registration fee. 9am4pm Nahele Banquet Room, Kahili Golf Course, (2500 Honoapiilani Hwy, Wailuku); 808-572-3499; 9thlifehawaii.org PAULA FUGA SUPPER CLUB - Sat, Aug 25. A 4-course dinner and show featuring Pau-

la Fuga, Mike Love and Sam Ites. $30 show, $60 dinner & show. 6pm Stella Blues Cafe, (1279 S. Kihei Rd., # 201); 808-874-3779; stellablues.com DJ Z-TRIP - Sat, Aug 25. DJ Z-Trip aka “The Godfather of Mash-Ups” is making a rare club performance on Maui. Special guests include Jay.P and DJ Sweet Beets. Hard tickets can be purchased at Charley’s, Karamel Collection (Paia) and Requests Music. Presale #1 sold out, presale #2 $25, presale #3 $30. 9pm Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon, (142 Hana Hwy., Paia); 808-579-8085; ztripmaui.eventbrite.com

EVENTS

THURSDAY, AUG 9 ARTIST DEMONSTRATION - Fine Art Oil Painter, Jack Hamilton, will be sharing his particular style and technique with the public. This is a great opportunity to see the entire process of creating a beautiful painting. A selection of his recent oil paintings will be on display. Free. 11am-2pm Maui Hands, (1169 Makawao Ave.); 808-572-2008; mauihands.com

FRIDAY, AUG 10 SOLO ARTIST EXHIBITION MEMBERS’ OPENING RECEPTION - Featuring Valerie Yong Ock Kim to present “Light Speed Matter, A Still Place Waiting” and Maui artist Billy Welker with “a continuing exploration in sculptural oil paintings on wood of the figure and the portrait as objects and vessels of humanness.” Free. 5-7pm Hui No’eau Visual Arts Center, (2841 Baldwin Ave., Makawao); 808-5726560; huinoeau.com MEET THE ARTIST - Maui Hands Gallery presents the photography of Monica and Michael Sweet. Come by the gallery to meet the artists and to take a look at their work inspired by the beauty of Maui and the Hawaiian Islands. Free. 4-7:30pm Maui Hands, Lahaina, (612 Front St., Ste. D); 808-6679898; mauihands.com HAWAI’I CRAFTSMEN’S ANNUAL JURIED STATEWIDE EXHIBITION PRESHOW - Come view the work of talented craft artists displaying everything from jewelry, metals and mixed media to fibers and quilting. Exhibition will run from August 11th through 21st, 10am6pm. Free. 6-8pm Next to Thailand Cuisine at Maui Mall, (70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808871-1307; mauimall.com O-BON FESTIVAL - Today and Saturday. Service begins at 7pm. Dancing begins at 8pm. Free. Wailuku Hongwanji Mission, (1828 Vineyard St., Wailuku); 808-244-0406

SATURDAY, AUG 11 HANDCRAFTED MOCCASIN CLASS See picks on p. 17 for info. 2-day course: Aug 11th and 25th. $350. If the Shoe Fits, (21 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-2499710; teriedmonds.com.

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

8/9

8/10

8/11

8/12

8/13-8/15

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM Envy Nightclub 9pm; $10 cover

ALE HOUSE

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

AMBROSIA

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-1011

DigiLuxe w/ DJ Kurt 10pm; no cover

House Music & You w/ DJ AstroRaph 10pm; no cover

Sunrize Saturdaze w/ DJ Decka 10pm; no cover

Sunday Skool Nightclub (Hip Hop) w/ DJ Jamn J 10pm; no cover

WED - Karaoke w/ Sista Deva, 8pm12:30am (all sets no cover)

Ultra w/ DJ CIA 10pm; no cover

MON - DJ Skinny Guy / TUE - DJ LaRage and DJ AstroRaph / WED - DJ Del Sol and DJ CIA (all sets 10pm; no cover)

Ladies Night 10pm-close; no cover

BLUE LAGOON

Wharf Cinema Center, 658 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4900

Sam Ahia 7-9:30pm; no cover

MON - Dave Caroll / TUE - Jordan Cuddy / WED - Ekolu Kalama (all sets 7-9:30pm; no cover)

Bob Jones 7-9:30pm; no cover

Jonny Ringo 7-9:30pm; no cover

CASANOVA

Boom Party w/ DJs Sweet Beets and Matt Lane 10pm; $10

Dr. Nat and Rio Ritmo Salsa Y Samba Y Latin Pop, 10pm; $10

TUE - Willie K and The Warehouse Blues Band, 9pm; $10 / WED - Ladies Night - Fast Forward w/ DJ Kurt, 10pm; $5 before 11pm

CHARLEY’S

DJ DASnfx 10pm; no cover

I Want Candy - 80s Party 10pm; $5 w/ costume, $10

TUE - Eric Dotterer and Friends, 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Barefoot Minded 7:30-10pm; no cover

Jonny Ringo 7:30-10pm; no cover

Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; no cover

MON - Peter D, 7:30-10pm / TUE - Jazz, 7:30-10pm WED - Jordan Cuddy, 7:30-10pm

Pool Tournament 6:30pm; no cover

Ekolu Kalama 10pm; no cover

The House Shakers 9pm; no cover

Gina Martenilli 6pm; no cover

MON - Gomega / TUE - Rampage w/ S.I.N. / WED - Jukebox Party (all sets 10pm; no cover)

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB

Quiz Night 7pm; no cover

Dance Party 10pm; no cover

Dance Party 10pm; no cover

S.I.N. 6pm; no cover

MON - Dance Party / TUES - Jukebox Party WED - Kanoa (all sets 10pm; no cover)

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH

Rampage 9pm-close; no cover

Dat Guyz 9pm-close; no cover

Str8 Viben 9pm-close; no cover

Karaoke Industry Night 8pm-close; no cover

MON - Karaoke, 8pm-close / TUE - Music videos w/ DJ Daizy, 9pm-close / WED - Open Mic Night, 9pm-close (all sets no cover)

“All is One” DJ Industry Night, 10pm; no cover

The House Shakers 8-11pm; no cover

Brunch with Willie K 11-2pm; no cover

Karaoke

Karaoke

CAPTAIN JACK’S ISLAND GRILL Wharf Cinema Center, 672 Front St., Lahaina - 667-0988

Adam Masterson 7-9:30pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic w/ MT, 10pm-close; no cover

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

COOL CAT CAFE

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina - 667-0908

DIAMONDS ICE BAR 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-9299

1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8010

HARD ROCK CAFE 900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

ISANA

515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

KEALIA POND NATIONAL WILDLIFE REFUGE SUMMER OPENING - See picks on p. 17 for info. Free. 8am-3pm Kealia Pond National Wildlife Refuge Visitor Center and Kanuimanu Ponds Viewing Area, (Milepost 6, Mokulele Hwy. (Hwy. 311), Kihei); 808-875-1582 HALE MAHAOLU “SPAMSTRUCTION” EVENT - See picks on p. 17 for info. 10am1pm Queen Kaahumanu Center, (275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-3369; queenkaahumanucenter.com WILD DOLPHIN SAND SCULPTURE CONTEST - See picks on p. 17 for info. 9am12pm North end of Keawakapu Beach on the sand by Sarento’s Restaurant, (S. Kihei Rd.); 808-249-8811; pacificwhale.org TALK ABOUT WILD DOLPHIN RESEARCH Part of Wild Dolphin Days, the talk includes a slide and video presentation about Maui County’s wild dolphins. Free. 6-7:30pm Pacific Whale Foundation’s Discovery Center, (300 Ma’alaea Rd., Ste. 100); 808-249-8811; pacificwhalestore.org COMMUNITY GARDEN EARTH BAG ARCHITECTURE - Today and tomorrow. The public is invited to help build a 300-foot retaining wall for SLIM’s community garden terraces. Volunteers should bring shovels, water, snacks and work gloves. Lunch will be provided from Flatbread Co. To get involved or donate, contact Tracy Tarlow via phone or e-mail. 10am3pm UH Maui College, (310 Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 415-717-2217; sustainablemaui.org; tracytarlow@gmail.com SECOND SATURDAY ART - Free. 10am12pm Maui Thing, (7 N. Market St., Wai-

Karaoke

luku); 808-249-0215

SUNDAY, AUG 12 WILD DOLPHIN PHOTO SAFARI CRUISE - Wildlife photographer David Fleetham and PWF dolphin researcher Betsy Davidson leads a hands-on photography workshop at sea. Learn and practice the best techniques for photographing dolphins in the wild. $99.95. 6:30-10:30am Pacific Whale Foundation’s raft Ocean Freedom at Lahaina Harbor, 808-2498811; pacificwhalestore.org

MONDAY, AUG 13 CHILDREN’S ART PROGRAM: “ADDING SHADOWS TO YOUR ART WORK - PHASE II” - Elizabeth Brandon, an art instructor of the Lahaina Arts Association, will continue her discussion on the importance of adding shadows to art work and demonstrate how to determine where the light source is coming from by using pencils and paper. Free. 2:30pm Children’s Section, Makawao Public Library, (1159 Makawao Ave.); 808-573-8785; librarieshawaii.org ARTIST DEMONSTRATION - Makawao pastelist Kathleen O’Bryan will be demonstrating her technique of undiluted dry pigment soft pastels on black paper. Free. 11am-4pm Maui Hands, Paia, (84 Hana Hwy.); 808-579-9245; mauihands.com

TUESDAY, AUG 14 VOCAL GOSPEL WORKSHOP - Grammy Award Winning vocalist/composer, John Flucker, and special guest vocalist/vocal coach, Lani Starr, team up for a one-day workshop for singers. $35 per person; children under 12 $25; children under 5 free; 25 free tickets will be giv-

WED - Karaoke

en away to the first 25 underprivileged children or youths who email. 6:30pm Hope Chapel, (300 E. Welakahao St., Kihei); 808-879-8888; tinyurl.com/cdarm7m; music@lanistarr.com

808-897-6770 ext. 2; theshopsatwailea.com

WEDNESDAY, AUG 15

CANOES - Sun, Live Jazz 3-6pm; Fri, Howard Ahia 5:30-8:30pm. (1450 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-0937.

COMMERCIAL SERVICES PLAN PUBLIC MEETING - An “open house” meeting with information stations where people can engage in conversation with Park staff who can answer questions and take public comments. A brief PowerPoint presentation will be given after the meeting. Free. 5-7pm Mayor Hannibal Tavares Pukalani Community Center (near the pool), (91 Pukalani St.); 808-572-4402; nps.gov/hale MEET THE ARTIST - Maui Hands Gallery presents new photography by fine-art photographer Scott Mead. He is an awardwinning artist and author of “The Magic of Maui - Ka Makaahehe o Maui.” Free. 1-6pm Maui Hands, Kaanapali, (200 Nohea Kai Dr.); 808-667-7997; mauihands.com OCCUPY MAUI MEETING - The group’s focus is on foreclosure laws and environmental problems. They want to hear about your issues. Simply attend one of their weekly Wed. meetings to get involved. Free. 5-7pm At Freedom Lawn or Pavilion at UH Maui College, (310 Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); occupymaui.com WOW! WAILEA ON WEDNESDAYS - The Shops at Wailea hosts their weekly arts and entertainment series, featuring Leokane and CJ ‘Boom’ Helekahi in the lower courtyard and a slew of shop-to-shop specials. @ShopsAtWailea on Twitter. Free. 6:30-8pm The Shops at Wailea, Lower Courtyard, (3750 Wailea Alanui);

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI

CAPTAIN JACK’S ISLAND GRILL - Wed, Ekolu Kalama 7-9:30pm; Thu, Adam Masterson 7-9:30pm; Fri, Bob Jones 7-9:30pm; Sat, Jonny Ringo 7-9:30pm; Sun, Sam Ahia 7-9:30pm; Mon, Dave Carroll 7-9:30pm; Tue, Jordan Cuddy 7-9:30pm. (672 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0988. COOL CAT CAFE - Wed, Jordan Cuddy 7:3010pm; Thu, Barefoot Minded 7:30-10pm; Fri, Jonny Ringo 7:30-10pm; Sat, Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; Sun, Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; Mon, Peter deAquino 7:30-10pm; Tue, Jazz 7:3010pm. (Wharf Cinema Center, 658 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0908. DUKE’S BEACH HOUSE - Every Mon & Tue, Eddie & Alika 6-8:30pm; Daily, Hula Performance 6:30pm; Every Mon & Wed, Brian 3-5pm; Wed, Daniel & Kahala 6-8:30pm; Thu, Garrett & Peter 6-8:30pm; Fri, Garrett 3-5pm; Every Fri & Sat, Damon & Ron Oversize Productions 6-8:30pm; Sat, Tim 3-5pm; Sun, Damon & Tim 6-8:30pm; Every Tue & Thu, Ben 3-5pm. (130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina); 808-662-2900. FLEETWOOD’S ON FRONT ST. - Fri, Live music 6-9pm; Sat, Bob Jones & Nils Rosenblad 6-9pm; Sun, Live music 6-9pm; Mon, Sam & Howard Ahia 6-9pm; Tue, Mark Johnstone & Lenny Castellanos 6-9pm; Wed, Live music 6-9pm; Thu, Kanoa 6-9pm. (744 Front St., Lahaina); 808-669-6425.

AUGUST 9, 2012 23

VOTED BEST HAPPY HOUR ON MAUI! 4 ,*)&* 3% t ". ". %"*-: t %*//&3 A5*- 1.

AUG. 9

TH UR S

SA LS A NI GH T W/ NIETO & BARBARA 7:3 0P M- 9:3 0P M

10

AUG. FR I NTS NEXT LEVEL ENTERTAINMENT PRESE

BOTTOMS UP FRIDAYS 1. r /0 $07&3

AUG. 11 SAT "//6"- %6$, '"5 #*35)%": #"4) 8*5) -*7& .64*$ #:

RAMPAGE10PM

& SPECIAL GUEST

TU E

AUG.14

TACO TUESDAYS

$

4-10PM CO 2.50 TA S, CORONA, DOS XX & PACIFICOS

24 AUGUST 9, 2012

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

8/9

8/10

8/11

8/12

8/13-8/15

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM Rick Glencross 7pm - close; no cover

Guest Performer 7pm - close; no cover

JAY’S PLACE

Live Music w/ Jordan T. 10pm-close; no cover

Pa’amana 9:30pm-close; no cover

Kawika, 7pm

Kenny Roberts, 7pm

Eight Track Players, 7pm

John Grover, 7pm

MON - That’s What I’m Talking About TUE - Da Ha-y-ans WED - Herb Anderson (all sets 7pm)

1810 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Danyel Alana & Don Lopez 8-10pm; no cover

1810 8-10pm; no cover

Benny Uyetake & Glenn Kakagawa, 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

MON - Benny Uyetake & Glenn Kakagawa, 6-8pm / TUE-WED Sam Ahia, 6:30-8:30pm (all sets no cover)

Karaoke & Dancing 9:30-close; no cover

Karaoke & Dancing 9:30-close; no cover

3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. - 667-0787

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina - 661-6699

KAHALE’S

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 875-7711

KIMO’S

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE STEAKHOUSE

136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

LAHAINA CAFE

843 Waine’e St., Lahaina - 667-6655

Free Karaoke w/ Danny DJ 10pm-12am; no cover

Rick Glencross 7pm - close; no cover

Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm - close; no cover

MON - Farzad & Mike Madden / TUE - Farzad & Mike Madden / WED - Tracy Stiles (all sets 7pmclose; no cover)

JAVA JAZZ

MON - Alex Calma / WED - The Whiskey Pimps (both sets 10pm; no cover)

MON - Trivia Night w/ John, 7-9pm / TUE - Open Mic w/ Kenny, 10pm-12am / WED Megatouch Game Day w/ Katie, 7-9pm

Pool Tournament 7-9pm

L‘AVA SPORTS BAR & KARAOKE

Free Karaoke

Live Music 7:30pm; no cover

LILIKOI RESTAURANT & WINE BAR

Live Music 7-9:30pm; no cover

Kimo Nevius 7-9:30pm; no cover

LONGHI’S LAHAINA

Sounds of Addiction 10pm-close; $5

Jazz All Stars, 7-10pm DJ Benjamin Jay, 10pm; $5

LULU’S LAHAINA

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

Karaoke Night 10:30pm; no cover

Justin Phillips 6:30pm; no cover

DJ’s Big Mike and Money Mike in the Mix, 10pm-close; $10

MERRIMAN’S

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

MON - The Benoits / TUE - David Choy / WED - Ranga Pae (all sets 6-9pm)

MOANA BAKERY & CAFE

Benoit Jazz Works 7-9pm; no cover Murray Thorne 7-9pm / Pub Quiz Night w/ Trish da Dish!, 9:30pm (both sets no cover)

Elaine Ryan 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Tyler Bush 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

The Celtic Tigers w/ Bagpiper Roger McKinely 6:30-9:30pm; no cover

MON - Joel Katz, 6:30-8:30pm; no cover TUE - Brenton Keith, 7-8pm; no cover WED - Willie K, 7-9pm; dinner & show $65

Salsa Night w/ Nieto & Barbara 7:30pm; no cover

Bottoms Up Fridays w/ NLE, 10pm; no cover

Annual Duck Fat Birthday Bash w/ Rampage, 10pm

1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4888

810 Haiku Rd., Haiku - 575-2629

888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua - 669-6400

71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

OCEANS BAR & GRILL 1819 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-2414

HARD ROCK CAFE - Fri, Evan Shulman 6-9pm; Sun, Brunch with Willie K 11am-2pm; Daily, R.E. Metoyers Blues Rock & Soul Review 11am-3pm. (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-7400. HULA GRILL - Tue, Jarrett Roback & Junior Lacuesta 1:30pm; Daily, Hula Grill Happy Hour 3-5pm; Tue, Damon & Danyel Alana 4pm; Tue, Wili Pohaku & Peter DeAquino 6:30pm; Every Mon, Wed & Thu, Ernest Pua’a 11am; Wed, Kaniala Masoe 1:30pm; Wed, Peter DeAquino 4pm; Wed, Ernest Pua’a & Friends 6:30pm; Thu, Alika Nakaoka 1:30pm; Thu, Kaniala Masoe 4pm; Thu, Kulewa 6:30pm; Fri, Kaniala Masoe 1:30pm; Every Sun, Fri & Sat, 1810 4pm; Fri, Kawika, Roy & Albert 6:30pm; Sat, Ron, Ikaika & Damon 1:30pm; Sat, Derick & Damon 6:30pm; Sun, Danyel Alana 1:30pm; Sun, Derick Sebastian Trio 6:30pm; Mon, Kawika Lum Ho 1:30pm; Mon, Armadillo & Derek 4pm; Mon, Derick Sebastian & Josh Kahula 6:30pm; Every Sun, Tue, Fri & Sat, Kawika Lum Ho 11am. (Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pwy., Bldg P, Lahaina); 808-667-6636.

LAHAINA CAFE - Fri, Alex L Calma 7-9pm. (843 Wainee St., Unit 1 & 2); 808-667-6655. LAHAINA PIZZA COMPANY - Every Wed, Thu & Fri, John Kane 7:30-9:30pm; Sat, Harry Troupe 7:30-9:30pm; Sun, Greg Di Piazza 7:30-9:30pm; Every Mon & Tue, Martin Tevaga 7:30-9:30pm. (730 Front St.); 808-661-0700. LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Fri, JD & Friends 3-5pm; Sat, JD & Harry 3-5pm; Sun, Merv Oana 3-5pm; Thu, Jarret & Wilson 3-5pm. (Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J); 808-661-4495. LONGBOARDS KA’ANAPALI - Every Tue, Wed, Thu & Fri, Solo guitarist 5:30-8:30pm. (100 Nohea Kai Dr.); 808-667-1200. LULU’S LAHAINA SURF CLUB & GRILL Thu, Howard Ahia 6-8pm; Fri, Justin Phillips 6:309:30pm; Sat, Ben Alaon 6:30-9:30pm; Wed, Kenny Roberts 6-9pm. (Lahaina Cannery Mall, 1221 Honoapiilani Hwy. #A1); 808-661-0808.

JAVA JAZZ/SOUP NUTZ - Every Thu & Sat, Rick Glencross 7pm; Fri, Guest Performer 7pm; Fri, Tracy Stiles 7pm; Every Sun, Mon & Tue, Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm. (3350 L. Honoapiilani Hwy. #203 & 204, Honokowai ); 808-667-0787.

MERRIMAN’S - Daily (except Mon & Tue), Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30pm; Mon, The Benoits 5:30-8:30pm; Tue, David Choy 5:30-8:30pm. (1 Bay Club Pl., Lahaina); 808-669-6400.

KIMO’S - Sun, Danyel Alana & Don Lopez 6:30-8:30pm; Every Tue & Wed, Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm; Thu, 1810 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, 1810 8-10pm; Mon, Benny Uyetake and Glenn Kakagawa 6-8pm; Fri, Willie K. 9-11pm. (845 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-4811.

PARADISE GRILL - Thu, Mark Johnson & John Zangrande 6-9pm; Fri, Teri Garrison 6-8pm; Sat, JD & Harry 6-8pm; Sun, Hawaiian Music Night 6-8pm; Mon, Mark Johnstone & Lenny Castellanos 6-9pm; Tue, JD & Harry 6-8pm. (2291 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Lahaina); 808-662-3700.

TUE - Free Karaoke

Live Music 7-9:30pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic Night, 6-10pm; no cover (sign up starts at 5pm) TUE - Johnny Ringo, 8-10pm WED - Kenny Roberts, 6-9pm; no cover

PINEAPPLE GRILL - Sat, Jazz on the Green 7-10pm; Fri, Jawaiian Music 7-10pm. (200 Kapalua Dr.); 808-669-9600. PIONEER INN GRILL & BAR - Wed, JD on the Rocks 5-8pm; Thu, Greg di Piazza feat. Alana Cini 5:30-8:30pm; Tue, Ah-Tim Elenicki 5:30-8:30pm. (658 Wharf St., Lahaina); 808-661-8881. RB BLACK ANGUS STEAKHOUSE - Sun, Live Jazz 3-6pm; Tue, Piano Jazz w/ Gene Argel 6-9pm. (4465 Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina); 808-669-8889. SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT, NAPILI KAI BEACH RESORT - Every Mon & Wed, Albert Kaina 7-9pm; Sat, Coelho Morrison 7-9pm; Sun, Andrew Kaina 7-9pm; Every Tue, Thu & Fri, Kincaid Kupahu 7-9pm. (5900 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy.); 808-669-1500.

SOUTH MAUI AMBROSIA - Thu, Jamie Gallo 7pm; Mon, Toby Couture & John Michael 8pm; Wed, Red Carpet Movie Night: The Big Lebowski 7:309pm. (1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-891-1011. BEACH BUMS BAR & GRILL - Every Sun & Wed, Mark Burnett 5-8pm; Every Thu & Sat, Kenny Roberts 5-8pm; Fri, Tom Cherry & Mike Finkiewicz 5-8pm; Tue, Randall Rospond 5-8pm. (300 Maalaea Rd. #1M); 808-243-2286. BUZZ’S WHARF - Thu, Kanikapila Thursdays with Marvin Tevaga 4-7:30pm. (390 Maalaea Boat Harbor Rd.); 808-244-5426.

LIST YOUR EVENT! Post your free online listing (up to 15 months early), and our editors will consider your submission for the printed calendar as well. Print listings are also free, but subject to space limitations. Online, you can include a full description of your event, a photo and a link to your Web site. Go to mauitime. com/listing and start posting events. Deadline for print listings is 10 days prior to the issue in which you wish the listing to appear.

WAIT, THERE’S MORE! Looking for something to do? Use MauiTime’s free calendar to browse hundreds of events online. Art galleries, family events, education classes, film and literary events, church groups, music, sports, volunteer opportunities—all this and more on our free events calendar at mauitime.com/calendar.

Start planning your week!

AUGUST 9, 2012 25

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PARADISE GRILL

2291 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Lahaina - 662-3700

Mark Johnson & John Zangrande, 6-9pm

Teri Garrison, 6-8pm Live music or DJ, 10pm

JD & Harry 6-8pm

Hawaiian Music 6-8pm

RB STEAKHOUSE

WED - Open Mic Night, 9:30pm; no cover

4465 Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina - 669-8889

Jazz Club Maui w/ host band SLAM! 8:30pm; $15

ROYAL LAHAINA

2780 Kekaa Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

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Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

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Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

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SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE

DJ Blast 10pm-close; no cover

DJ Gemini & DJ Ynot 10pm; no cover

DJ LX 10pm-close; no cover

115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116, Kihei - 879-0004

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

2411 S. Kihei Rd. #B4 - 879-0602

1234 L. Main St., Wailuku - 243-2206

STELLA BLUES CAFE 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-3779

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

R.S. SHARKY’S

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 874-6115

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-3133

TIFFANY’S

1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

TIMBA

505 Front St, Ste. 212, Lahaina - 661-9873

WATERCRESS

Waiehu Beach Center, Wailuku-243-9351

CAPISCHE? - Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm; Sun, Mark Johnstone 6-9pm; Fri, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm. (555 Kaukahi St., Kihei); 808-879-2224. DIAMONDS ICE BAR & GRILL - Sun, Gina Martenilli 6pm. (1279 S. Kihei Rd. # 314); 808-874-9299. DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB - Wed, Kanoa 7pm. (1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-875-9669. HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH - Thu, Junior Lacuesta 4-8pm; Sat, Ryan Robinson 4-8pm; Mon, Jacob (of the Alliez) 4-8pm; Every Tue, Wed & Fri, Rick Glencross 4-8pm. (1913 S. Kihei Rd. #E); 808-891-8010. JUST WING IT! - Every Fri & Sat, Chicken Boxing 5-7pm. (225 Piikea Ave., Kihei); 808-875-9464. KAMAOLE POOLSIDE CAFE - Wed, Steve Sargenti 6-9pm; Thu, Island favorites with Kawika Lum Ho 6-9pm; Fri, Girls Night Out with Gina Martinelli 6-9pm; Sat, Ron Shadian and Friends 6-9pm; Sun, Kenny Roberts 6-9pm; Mon, Music by Rama 6-9pm; Tue, Mike & Mark 6-9pm. (2259 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-891-8860. MONKEYPOD KITCHEN - Wed, Jarret & Wilson 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Wolf 3-5pm; Fri, Alika Naka’oka 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Barefoot Minded 3-5pm; Sat, Erin

Kanoa 10pm-close

MON - Kanoa, 4pm / TUE - DJ LX, 10pm WED - Ladies’ Night w/ The ADD Twins, 10pm (all sets no cover)

Jordan & Gordon 9pm-midnight; no cover

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR STEEL HORSE SALOON

MON - Lenny Castellanos & Mark Johnstone, 6-9pm / TUE - Rock n Roll Night, 6-8pm WED - Johnny Ringo w/ Mark D’Antonio, 10pm-1am

Bike Night w/ Na Himeni 7pm, no cover

Jus’ Us and Vince Esquire 8:30pm; no cover

Kawika Ortiz 8:30pm; no cover

Free Karaoke 6pm; no cover

MON - Karaoke w/ Vince Esquire, 6pm / TUE Nurse Night / WED - Free Karaoke/Pool, 6pm

Ah-Tim 4-6pm; no cover

The Lambsbread & Bengali & The Bottomless Tree 9pm; $15

Cindy Combs w/ Kanoa Kukaua and Ryan Rego 7pm; $10

Jamie Lawrence 4-6pm; no cover

MON - Mike Finkewiecz, 4-6pm TUE - Tom Conway, 4-6pm / WED - Randall Rospond, 4-6pm (all sets no cover)

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; no cover

Jaime Gallo Band 9pm-1am; $4

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; no cover

Karaoke/Family Night 6pm; no cover

Live Music & Dancing 8pm; no cover

Live Music 5:30-7:30pm; no cover

WED - Brenton Keith & His Bag O’Tricks; 7pm; no cover

Open Mic Night w/ Shaun Michael, 9pm; no cover

50 Shades of Grey w/ DJ Kamikaze, 10pm; no cover

Inna Vision feat. For Twenty Daze, 10pm; $10

Louise Lambert 6-9pm; no cover

WED - The House Shakers 8:30pm; no cover

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

MON through WED- Karaoke

closed

We Love Timba Fridays 9:45pm-2am; $10

Spun Out Saturdays 9:45pm-2am; $10

closed

MON through WED - closed

Twisted Thursdays w/ Party Rock Krew 10pm; no cover

Forbidden Fridays w/ Party Rock Krew 10pm; no cover

Free Karaoke 9pm; no cover

Free Karaoke 9pm; no cover

MON - Free Karaoke, 9pm / TUE - Free Karaoke, 9pm / WED - Singles’ Night w/ X-Klusive Sounds Productions, 10pm (All sets no cover)

Smith 6:30-8:30pm; Sun, Alika Naka’oka 3-5pm; Sun, Kilohana 6:30-8:30pm; Mon, Ron & Tarvin 6:30-8:30pm; Tue, Kilohana 6:30-8:30pm. (10 Wailea Gateway Pl., Unit B-201); 808-891-2322. MONSOON INDIA - Sat, Cambria Moss & Ricardo Dioso 6:30-8:30pm; Tue, The Hula Honeys 5:30-8:30pm. (760 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-875-4555. MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Wed, Joel Katz 5:30-6:30pm; Wed, Willie K 7-9pm; Thu, Murray Thorne 7-9pm; Fri, Elaine Ryan 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Tyler Bush 6:308:30pm; Sun, The Celtic Tigers w/ Mad Bagpiper Roger McKinley 6:30-9:30pm; Mon, Joel Katz 6:30-8:30pm; Tue, Brenton Keith and his Bag O’ Tricks 7-8pm. (100 Kaukahi St., Wailea); 808-874-1131. PITA PARADISE WAILEA - Sun, Benoit Jazzworks 5:30-7:30pm; Fri, Twisted Hips Belly Dancing 6-8pm. (34 Wailea Gateway Plaza); 808-879-7177. SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Wed, Mark Johnstone 4-6pm; Thu, Jaime Gallo 4-6pm; Fri, Randall Rospond 4-6pm; Sat, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Sun, Viva La Rumba 4-6pm; Tue, Sebrina Barron 4-6pm. (Kihei Kalama Village, 1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-874-6444. STELLA BLUES CAFE - Wed, Randall Rospond 4-6pm; Thu, Ah Tim 4-6pm; Fri, Ahu-

manu 4-6pm; Sun, Jamie Lawrence 4-6pm; Mon, Mike Finkiewicz 4-6pm; Tue, Tom Conway 4-6pm. (1279 S. Kihei Rd., # 201); 808-874-3779. TAQUERIA CRUZ - Every Tue & Sat, Live Music - Reggae, Jazz, Blues 5:30-8:30pm. (2395 S. Kihei Rd. #112); 808-875-2910. THE RED BAR AT GANNON’S, A PACIFIC VIEW RESTAURANT - Thu, Fulton Tashombe & Special Guests 6-8pm; Tue, Braddah Larry Golis 6-8pm. (Wailea Golf Club House, 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr.); 808-875-8080. THREE’S BAR & GRILL - Sun, Louise Lambert 6-9pm; Daily, Live Music on the Patio 7-9pm. (1945 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-879-3133. TOMMY BAHAMA’S TROPICAL CAFE Every Thu & Fri, Margie Heart 5:30-9:30pm; Every Sun & Sat, Howard Ahia 5:30-9:30pm; Mon, Greg Di Piazza 5:30-9:30pm; Wed, Merv Oana 5:30-9:30pm. (3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., Kihei); 808-875-9983.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI CAFE DES AMIS - Thu, Joe Conte 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Live Argentinian music 6:30-8:30pm; Wed, Mark Johnstone 6:30-8:30pm. (42 Baldwin Ave., Paia); 808-579-6323. CHARLEY’S RESTAURANT & SALOON - Tue, Eric Dotterer & Friends 6:30-9:30pm. (142 Hana Hwy., Paia); 808-579-8085. HANA HOU CAFE - Tue, Hipnautical 6-9pm. (810 Haiku Rd.); 808-575-2661. LILIKOI GRILL RESTAURANT & WINE BAR - Mon, Open Mic Night 6-10pm; Every Thu & Sat, Live Music 7-9:30pm; Fri, Kimo Nevius 7-9:30pm. (810 Kokomo Road, Suite 186, Haiku); 808-575-2629. MAKAWAO STEAK HOUSE - Thu, Randall Rospond 5:30-8:30pm. (3612 Baldwin Ave.); 808-572-8711. MOANA BAKERY & CAFE - Thu, Benoit Jazz Works 7-9pm. (71 Baldwin Ave., Paia); 808-579-9999.

CENTRAL MAUI CAFE O’LEI AT THE DUNES AT MAUI LANI - Every Fri & Sat, Phil and Angela Benoit 5:30-8pm; Thu, Reiko Fukina 5:30-8pm. (1333 Maui Lani Pkwy., Kahului); 808-877-0073.

NORTHSHORE CAFE - Fri, Makana 7-9pm; Tue, Ryan - Keyboards from Brooklyn 7-9pm. (824 Kokomo Rd., Haiku); 808-575-2770. PAIA BAY CAFE - Sun, Hawaiian Steel Guitar w/ Joel Katz 9-11am. (43 Hana Hwy.); 808-579-3111.

AUGUST 9, 2012 27

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Horoscope

Sign Language BY CAERIEL CRESTIN LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Remember the story of the Velveteen Rabbit? It was a stuffed toy that longed to be real. I sometimes imagine you burdened with a similar craving. Not that you’re fake—au contraire! But you are aware that many people project a warmer, fuzzier image onto you, instead of seeing the “real you.” This week, show off your true nature, even if it shocks some people, something along the lines of ripping off your cute pink bunny nose and throwing it playfully (but effectively) in someone’s eye, perhaps while demonstrating your fearsome Lion’s roar, shattering all their previously held illusions about you.

roes. No one on your team felt personally called to the duty of protecting society or fighting crime; it was simply required by virtue of your superior abilities. You’re asked, often, to bend to the will of a group oriented toward worthy goals that are nevertheless not your own—something neither painful nor intolerable, but not vastly pleasurable, either. Hard work rarely is. Reaping the rewards, though—as you will next week—is always fun. Do your job this week, and hope for the resulting cheers, the glory, the mayoral delivery of the key to the city. If all else fails to motivate, remember: The hero always, always gets the girl (or boy).

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) Are you worthy of seduction, Virgo? Someone would love to woo you with hidden poetry and zany midnight serenades and wild surprises. But are you ready for that much fun? Are you prepared to rise to the occasion and help create an enormous love? Or will you cheapen it all by accepting the gifts and ultimately deciding you’re not good enough to deserve something so good? You are worthy; if only you’ll believe it. Take this chance to be (and love) the person you really are; sweetness like what awaits you is so rare you may have to wait years or lifetimes until it comes around again.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) I’m in awe of saplings that spring up between cracks in the sidewalk, eventually causing the concrete to buckle and break, or the stubborn refusal of thorny blackberry vines to give up their territory. Their incredible determination has to be respected, just as yours does, especially once you succeed at pushing through the forces that struggle to pave you over completely. This week, your battle should get a little easier. The psychic equivalent of an earthquake should free you from some of your limitations as hundreds of new cracks—in other words, places to grow—finally appear.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Are you supported and loved by your family and community? Do you feel like if you fall, you’ll be caught, helped up and loved? What you’ve been contemplating is like jumping off a building into the arms of your crowd. Are you sure your last sight won’t be panicked people surging in all directions to get out from under you, leaving you in a perfect circle of splat? I don’t think you need to doubt your vital place in your community, but in case you do anyway, let me tell you: the best way to be sure you’ll be caught in the safety net is to be part of the safety net.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) The government of Bhutan has as one of its guiding precepts the function of increasing Gross National Happiness. While I have no idea what system they use for measuring such a subjective state, nor how effective it actually is, I still find it a wonderfully admirable intention, far preferable to simply increasing profits or lowering taxes. Basing most governmental decisions on whether or not they’ll make people happier in the long run is pretty awesome. When making choices this week, attempt to increase your Gross Local Happiness. Choose actions that will make you and those around you happier, and I really can’t see how you can go wrong.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) This week you may find your heart in an uncomfortable place, like your throat. Don’t waste energy swallowing it back to somewhere less frightening. Spit it out instead. Inspect the poor, neglected organ. Check it for injuries. Is it bruised? Battered? Atrophied? Torn? Conduct some impromptu kitchen-table heart surgery if necessary. Perhaps it needs to be gently held and fed with an eyedropper, like an abandoned baby bird. Or maybe it craves lullabies and bedtime stories, or possibly some racier action. Once you’ve cuddled, sung or screwed your heart back to radiant health, put it back where it belongs. But don’t forget to use it, though, or you’ll be right back where you started. SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) Oh, you can be gentle. I know you. When you wish, you’re as soft, fuzzy and cute as a baby kitten. But even in your adorability, you retain those sharp little teeth and that unpredictable demeanor. Sheathe those needlelike claws. Right now, it’s your sweet vulnerability that’s most important. We already know you’re tough, but all that gusto, that machismo/femismo, can only get you so far. Instead of trying to surprise people with your muscular ego, why not awe them with your willingness to show it all? You’re a big fan of truth, in general. Broadcast yours. CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) You’re like a beleaguered, battered spaceship, harried by enemies. You escape with an extra burst of power, diverted to propulsion from shields and weapons systems. Or maybe you’re more like a marathon runner who miraculously draws on tomorrow’s reserves to pull into the lead on the final sprint today. I’m glad you expect so much of yourself. It’s good that you’re so aware of your priorities—this week, you’re capable of going most (or all) of the way to their fruition. Screw next week. It’ll take care of itself. You’ll be able to face its challenges more easily if you’ve successfully and completely taken care of this week’s shit. AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) I dreamt you were part of a team of dynamic superhe-

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TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Even during your low moments, you’re a formidable beast. There may come a time when you’ll need to put on a lamb outfit and assume the camouflage of one who’s quiet and meek, but not this week. Instead, set your buoyant confidence meter on “steady,” like a competent ship’s captain who’s preparing to sail into treacherous waters. Despite the sharp coral reefs, titanic waves and tumultuous storms that threaten your course, you have the skills and self-knowledge now to bring yourself to safe harbor with nary a scratch. So keep a firm hand on the tiller and issue the only order that’s becoming to a leader as heroic and inspiring as yourself: “Full sail ahead!” GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Picture an arm-thick cable, like those enormous hawsers used to secure huge ships to dock. They support tremendous weight and strain. That giant rope is composed of hundreds of smaller lines, each made up of many tiny threads. Individually, those filaments snap easily. But when woven into unity with other threads, their collective strength is magnified. Right now, you’re a haphazard, random bunch of loose ends. But if you really wish to accomplish your ambitions in the coming weeks/months/years, your task is clear—weaving at least some of those divergent convictions, ideas, opinions and dreams into a coherent whole. CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) You’re a bulldog this week: so ugly you’re cute. You’re like a bodybuilder in a ballet contest—where your immense strength does you absolutely no good—though you do cut a rather striking figure in that tutu. When you take some things to their most extreme, they become what they’re not. Your beauty isn’t such an asset when the modern-day equivalent of a hungry dragon is on the prowl for gorgeous young maidens. It may be frustrating to have to watch all your strengths become weaknesses, even if only temporarily. Take heart in the fact that the reverse is also possible—your most crippling weaknesses may serve you far better this week than your supposed strengths.

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AUGUST 9, 2012 29

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