16.15 Feeling The Burn, September 27, 2012, Volume 16, Issue 15, MauiTime

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Septem ember ber 2 27, 7 201 7, 2012 20 2✚V Vol o ume 16 ✚ Iss ssue e 15 5 ✚ FR REE

Complaints about sugar cane burns are flooding the county and EPA. But will anything change?

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SEPTEMBER 27, 2012


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Contents VOLUME 16 + ISSUE 15 Proofreader: Dina Wilson

ON THE COVER:

What do you think the Maui Fair lacks?

Interns: Sarah Gerlach, Lauren Hecker, Marina Satoafaiga, Oliver de Silva Complaints about sugar cane burns are flooding the county and EPA. But will anything change? PG.10

NEWS & VIEWS

10

FEATURE STORY

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EAT & DRINK

Graphic Designers: Amy Mendolia (Chuck Norris), Christina Tarleton

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THIS WEEK’S PICKS

Contributors: Caeriel Crestin, Jory John, Avery Monsen, Ron Pitts, Chuck Shepherd, Barry Wurst II

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FILM CRITIQUE

21

FILM TIMES

22

DA KINE CALENDAR

23

THE GRID

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CLASSIFIED

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HOROSCOPE

Art Director & Production Manager: Darris Hurst artdirector@mauitime.com / darrishurst.com Weird Al Yankovic performance

Photographer: Sean Michael Hower mauiweddingmedias.com / howerphotography.com Florida’s finest carnies! Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers (808) 283-3260 / brad@mauitime.com Monster trucks Admin. Executive: Keo Eaton (808) 244-0777 Oprah and a live DJ Calendar Assistant: Jenna Schamber calendar@mauitime.com Demolition Derby

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Culinary, Lifestyle & Business Editor: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter

Lovely NAIL & SPA L!

Septem ember ber 27, 27, 7 201 2012 20 2✚V Vol o ume 16 ✚ Iss ssue e 15 5 ✚ FR RE E

MAUI

Editor: Anthony Pignataro (808) 283-1308 / anthony@mauitime.com @apignataro on Twitter Genetically reengineered dinosaur fights

Admin Assistants: Sara Riley (the Graviton), Jennifer Brown (808) 244-0777

PLUS

Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter Real carnies

GMO

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION:

Cover design by Darris Hurst. Photo courtesy EpicStockMedia / shutterstock.com

SPECIA

PG.17

MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2012 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. MauiTime may be distributed only by MauiTime’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime. MauiTime 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 • fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com facebook.com/mauitime, @mauitime on Twitter Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of MauiTime

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News & Views

QUIZunderstood state Department of Labor and Industrial Relations, the unemployment rate for the island of Maui in August was 5.9 percent. What was the unemployment rate for Molokai? A. 12.8 percent. B. 13.5 percent. C. 14.0 percent. D. 14.5 percent. E. 15.3 percent.

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3. Last week, according to The Maui 1. On Friday, Sept. 21, a Maui fisherman spotted something huge floating in the ocean about 15 miles off Molokai, reported The Maui News the following day. What did the fisherman see? A. A humpback whale. B. A portion of a Japanese fishing dock torn loose during the 2011 tsunami. C. A swamped fishing boat that broke away from its moorings two months ago. D. A nuclear attack submarine conducting emergency surfacing maneuvers. E. Lanai owner Larry Ellison's ego.

News, the 75-year-old Kanemitsu Bakery on Molokai failed another state Health Department inspection. The island institution has been closed since June, and now owner George Kanemitsu is saying he’s had to lay off nine employees and may just close for good. How much did the Health Department fine Kanemitsu in May for violating health codes? A. $50,000. B. $60,000. C. $70,000. D. $80,000. E. $90,000.

2.

According to the latest unemployment figures released last week by the

See answers, page 29

Candidate!

Election Time

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO GETS CAMPAIGN DONATIONS FROM: Hawaiian Telcom Good Government Club, American Resort Development Association-Resort Owners’ Coalition PAC, Plumbers & Fitters PAC, Hawaii Laborers & Employers Cooperation & Education Trust Fund, Citizens Responsive Government

ANGUS MCKELVEY RUNNING FOR: Hawaii State House, District 10 (South and West Maui) RUNNING AGAINST: Chayne M. Marten BIRTHPLACE: Honolulu, HI PROFESSION: Incumbent ELECTORAL WIN/LOSS RECORD: 3/0 FIRST ELECTORAL VICTORY: 2006 SUPPORTS: Recruiting high-tech start-ups to Maui, repairing and expanding our roads and harbors, boating and safety buoys. OPPOSES: Current National Agricultural Statistics Service policies in regards to coffee

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SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

Angus McKelvey, son of Lahaina News founder Joan McKelvey, is (like just about everyone else in the Hawaii state Legislature) a Democrat, but that doesn’t tell you much about his time in office. He’s best known for advocating greater infrastructure spending and also for supporting tax credits for domestic filmmakers and start-ups wishing to locate here, but his legislative history is all over the map. In 2012, he sponsored resolutions that would urge “the National Agricultural Statistics Service to use green coffee, instead of parchment equivalent, as the basis for valuing Hawaii’s coffee crops” (HR 105, approved) and declare “Saturdays and Sundays to be ‘Eat Local, Buy Local’ Day in Hawaii” (HR 27, approved). He also pushed unsuccessfully for bills that would ask the state Librarian to convene a task force on library concessions (HCR 102), grant a 20-year lease for “one stand-alone casino in Waikiki not in a hotel” (HB 2788) and require state departments “to attempt to sell or donate office equipment to schools, nonprofits, or salvage businesses before disposal” (HB 2712). Isn’t legislating fun?


News & Views

Coconut Wireless

Talk of the Island

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO Given all the other things big companies and the government have concealed over the years (Agent Orange toxicity to American soldiers, targeted assassinations of suspected terrorists, warrantless spying on Americans by the National Security Agency), it’s no wonder GMO fear seems to be increasing.

WORKFORCE HOUSING HELD HOSTAGE?

GMO corn? Who knows...

GMO LABELING RESOLUTION PASSED Well, they finally did it. On Friday, Sept. 21, the Maui County Council voted 8-0 (Mike White was excused) to approve a resolution introduced by Councilmember Elle Cochran that would call for the labeling of all foods sold in the county that contain genetically modified organisms (GMOs). “WHEREAS, the long-term effects of consuming genetically engineered foods are unclear, and without mandatory labeling requirements of these foods consumers may unknowingly be putting their health at risk,” stated the resolution. “WHEREAS, consumers should have the right to know what is in food available for sale so that they can make informed choices...” This isn’t the first time the council has taken up the GMO issue. A similar labeling resolution failed last year. But in 2009, the council voted (again, unanimously) to prohibit any and all growing, testing or otherwise introducing genetically modified taro (kalo) into the county. As someone who earns a paycheck by making information public, I’m pretty much compelled to write that such a bill is a good thing. But how much good the resolution will bring about is a very difficult question. Unlike the GMO taro bill, the labeling resolution is toothless. It merely asks the state Legislature to pass a formal GMO labeling law during its 2013 session. But even if such a bill does pass the state House and Senate next year, and gets signed by Governor Neil Abercrombie, and all food labels in the State of Hawaii start saying “GMO,” it’s worth asking whether there will be any real change. We’ve been living with GMOs in our foods for a little over 15 years now, and GMOs are pretty deep into our food supplies. At the same time, hard research into their long-term effects (and possible harm) remains pretty scanty. A recent “lifetime feeding trial” in rats that seemed to show a link between GMO corn and

tumor growth and early death, while published in the peer-reviewed Food and Chemical Toxicology, is very controversial. “Whether these foods cause toxicity of any kind in humans or livestock remains unknown,” reported the nonprofit environmental news source Grist on Sept. 20. “There is not evidence that industrially raised cows that eat GMO feed are as riddled with tumors as these rats were. However, there has been some evidence that [Monsantomanufactured herbicide] Roundup, at least, may have serious and underreported health effects for livestock.” As is usually the case with such studies, the long-term health effects on humans remains a big unknown. There is, as yet, no evidence that what we’re eating is causing us harm, but at the same time, there’s a painful lack of research into the issue. But as is usually the case with giant multinational corporations, big money trumps big questions. Perhaps afraid of what consumers might do with packages containing the words “Genetically Modified,” GMO food producers have flatly refused to label their food products in the United States (Europeans, by contrast, enjoy widespread label laws). Doing so may be fine for their bottom line, but it also feeds fear and lends credence to the view that companies like Monsanto (which hasn’t yet commented on the recent GMO corn/rats study, to my knowledge) are hiding something nefarious and can’t be trusted with our health.

You know what isn’t increasing around here? The number of homes affordable to people who don’t pull in $200,000 or more every year. So-called “workforce housing” has long been a demand of county residents who look askance at modestly sized homes carrying $500,000 price tags, but land developers are traditionally loathe to build such dwellings because their profit margin is so slim. Which is why the Maui County Council voted a few years ago to mandate that a certain percentage of future housing developments fall into that workforce category, less we build out an island none of us

oper from crying out that the State Land Use Commission’s second look at the proposed Kihei Mega Malls may jeopardize the workforce housing attached to the old luxury Honu‘aula project, which apparently share an 88-acre lot along Pi‘ilani Highway in Kihei. If the state LUC reclassifies that land to agriculture, the developers say their workforce project will end up dead. “Honua‘ula contends that penalizing the workforce housing project because of the shopping centers would be ‘draconian and completely unreasonable,’” reported The Maui News on Sept. 24. “To that end, Honua‘ula is asking the Land Use Commission to separate its affordable housing project from the challenge facing the retail centers.” Sounds pretty reasonable, right? Except if you kept reading the Maui News article, you discovered that those friends of the working man at Honua‘ula actually have no idea when they might build said affordable housing. There’s no construction going on and no schedule on when it might take place. In short, there is no workforce project currently threatened by any pos-

Even this would help.

can afford to live on. The problem, which should surprise no one who’s spent more than 10 minutes on island, is that developers still aren’t building the workforce housing, even though the law requires that workforce construction begin first. Still, that isn’t stopping at least one devel-

Overheard “That dog is less cute when he’s trying to hump other dogs.” -Woman in South Kihei, Sept. 23

sible LUC rezoning. The Maui News then points out (much too gently and charitably for my taste) that the complete lack of a workforce housing project “contrasts” with what Honua‘lua developers told the Maui County Council back in 2007 when they approved the construction of the proposal’s 1,500-plus luxury homes and condos. Back then, Councilmember Mike Victorino was talking about how their new law meant they could get all that affordable housing immediately rather than “three or four years” later. If that seems rather humorous, how about this: on Sept. 14 Pacific Business News reported that the median price for a single-family home in Maui County is $520,000, nearly 27 percent higher than it was a year ago at this time. ■ anthony@mauitime.com + @apignataro To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615n1

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News & Views

MauiSphere

LOCAL PLUGS BY JEN RUSSO

PHOTO BY RANDY JAY BRAUN

SEABURY HALL ALUMS RE-UNITE FOR NEW CREATIVE ARTS CENTER More than a dozen Seabury Hall alumni from around the world will perform together at the inaugural show and gala opening of the A’ali’ikuhonua Creative Arts Center this Friday and Saturday evening at 7pm. Seabury Director of Advancement Kathleen Buenger says the center is part of their “3A” plan for Academics, Athletics and Arts. The show, which carries the name “ReUnite,” will include drama, music, art and dance by alumni reaching as far back as 1968 and as near as 2007. “We started in the ‘90s building an athletics center,” says Buenger. “The following decade we built a brand new upper school building and added onto our middle school building for academics. And now, the culmination of the plan is the Creative Arts Center. You may not know that the current studio used for performing arts was a converted gym including a corrugated tin roof.” Buenger says the capital campaign for the project is $7 million and that includes a $1 million endowment to cover the upkeep of the building. The center features a theater/lecture hall, arts gallery, dance studio, set shop and courtyard. The campus plans to use it for classes and performances as well offer the community a new venue for events. The center can seat 500 at full capacity, but also includes an outdoor space and allows for informal presentations in the dance studio and the foyer. “The gala is not going to be your

natural health, which is why Ayurveda is getting more recognition.” Suhas arrives on the island with his family this Thursday. He is a world-renowned Ayurvedic physician born and raised in a traditional Vedic family. In Santa Cruz, he directs the Ayurvedic Healing and Integrative Wellness Clinic. He often shares the stage with motivational speakers like Chopra and Wayne Dyer. “It’s a self referral science, which tells you that you must be responsible for your own well being,” says Dr. Suhas. “It is a science of life which allows us to understand and live life to its full potential. Western medicine has no role for prevention, it can only help once you have a disease or a diagnosed condition. Ayurveda is a health and wellness-based science which is far better than pill for every ill.” Suhas was recently re-elected for a third term on the board of directors for the National Ayurvedic Medical Association. Suhas says being raised in a traditional Vedic family is an “awake” life. He says as a result, he has a spiritual foundation and avoids wastage, focuses on frugality and

PHOTO BY HARI PRASAD NADIG

goal with the Erdman family as the major contributor to the campaign. In fact, the building’s name “A’ali’ikuhonua” comes from a mele Keali’i Reichel wrote to honor Pard Erdman, who then bestowed the name to the theater. Construction began in July 2011. The original completion date was April 2012, but that was moved back to September because of construction and weather delays. Flansburg Architects received support from local architects Reicke Sunnland and Kono Architects. The general contractor was Arita Poulson. L to R: Keali'i Reichel, Andre Morissette, “The current student body David Ward, Vanessa Cerrito, Stephen will benefit greatly from the Haines, Richie Franco, Todd Van Amburgh creative arts center both on and off the stage,” says Ward. “We are going to implement usual high school production; these new tech and design classes, costume design, alum performers are all accomplished and front of house education. We also hope professionals with an amazing range of to add new programs and festivals that will talent and abilities,” says David Ward, open the doors to students from high schools Director of Dance at Seabury Hall. “I’m island-wide such as music festivals, hula fesso excited to have this opportunity to tivals and dance and theater summer school work with some of these alum who were intensives. This is going to be a monumental my students over 20 years ago! I could event for us at Seabury Hall.” not be more proud and honored they See “Re-Unite” this weekend at Seabury are making the journey back to Maui to Hall. Tickets are $25 for adults, $20 for segrace our stage one more time.” niors and students and include complimenCurrent and former faculty members tary desserts and beverages. For information will perform as well. Paul Wood, who and reservations, call 808-573-1257. founded the Creative Arts Department, Additional research by Oliver de Silva will team up with with his successor Todd Van Amburgh for a display of GOT AYURVEDIC scenes from Seabury’s Shakespeare pastiche, Live! Tonight! At the Globe! StuHEALING? dents like acclaimed opera singer KimIf Western medicine leaves your health ball Wheeler (1968), Jazz composer a lot to be desired, then perhaps Dr. Isaac Raz (1986), Alaskan composer Suhas Kshirsagar might be of some Zak Wass (2003), dancer Julia Cost help. He will be visiting Maui this week (2005) and Rachel Berman (2007)– to teach Ayurvedic healing at the Maui currently cast in The House of Finnegan– Academy of Healing Arts. will all return to Maui to perform. Ayurveda is the traditional medicine of The center will also honor the Seabury India, developed over the last 5,000 years. Alumni who have become artists, graphic Popularity and awareness of Ayurveda is on artists, architects, painters and photograthe rise in the U.S., partly because of the phers with an art show in the gallery. All popular writer Deepak Chopra. Ayurveda the pieces hanging will be for sale. is different from Western medicine as it “It’s humbling to see the great work–go- focuses on prevention and illness with a set ing back years–from our alumni,” says Fine of health theories and practices centered Arts Department Chair Lenda McGehee, around diet and lifestyle. who is organizing and designing this first“Ayurveda is a consciousness-based ever alumni exhibit. “I started at Seabury approach to health,” says Dr. Suhas. “It is when Reid Johnson was here. Now he’s a even more necessary today as it is a preworking artist and graphic novelist whose ventive based medicine. It is a true mind, drawings have appeared several times in body and spirit medicine that allows our the New York Times Magazine.” bodies to live in harmony with mother Ward says the Performing and Fine nature. Healthy foods, nutrition, daily Arts Department started in 1989 and has and seasonal routines, yoga, meditation, grown rapidly ever since. Buenger says exercise and detoxification are pillars of they are at 80 percent of their funding

Feeling better yet?

sustainable living and maintains an ecofriendly attitude. He says the Ayurvedic diet is what you take in from all of your senses: it will give more value to “what you digest than to what you eat.” For more information, visit ayurvedichealing.com or call 808-250-7161. The first day seminar is $150 and runs 9am6pm; all three days cost $325. ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615n2

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Among the students featured in Popular Science’s September list of young inventors was Fabian Fernandez-Han, 14, of Conroe, Texas, who invented a bicycle that, when pedaled, also desalinates seawater (via reverse osmosis) from replaceable 15-gallon canisters. One hour of pedaling produces 20 gallons of drinkable water. Jack Andraka, 15, from Maryland, created a test for pancreatic cancer that is demonstrably much faster and more accurate than current diagnostics (using carbon nanotubes that can be specially activated by applications of the signature pancreaticcancer protein, Mesothelin).

CAN’T POSSIBLY BE TRUE School officials in Grand Island, Neb., told Hunter Spanjer that the way he signs his name violates the schools’ anti-weapons policy and that he’ll have to abandon it. Hunter is three and a half years old, deaf, fluent in the language Signing Exact English, and uses a hand flourish as his unique signature (registered with SEE), except that officials say the flourish looks like Hunter is threatening with a weapon. At press time, Hunter’s parents were still negotiating with officials.

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Police in Seneca Falls, N.Y., arrested Dawn Planty in August and charged her with statutory rape. Planty came to officers’ attention when she called 911 to ask if the dispatcher knew the age of consent in the state because she had had sex with a 15-year-old boy recently and wanted to clear her conscience.

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The Washington Post, reporting in August the existence of a newly declassified communication between a cooperating Guantanamo Bay detainee and his lawyer, revealed that the “high-value” prisoner had, without explanation, been rewarded with a pet kitty cat. And on July 4, two peace activists who own a small advertising agency in Malmo, Sweden, pulled off their most audacious stunt yet by hiring a small plane to drop 800 teddy bears emblazoned with democracy-promoting messages over the capital of Belarus. The country’s strongman president, Aleksandr Lukashenko, later fired two generals for their inability to prevent the breach of the country’s airspace.

PERSPECTIVE Many Americans are still outraged that no major banking officials were punished for the malpractices that produced the 2008 financial collapse. However, in July, Richard Eggers, age 68 and

with an otherwise-unblemished record, was fired by Wells Fargo because of a 49-year-old conviction for attempting to rig a laundromat machine by making a “dime” out of cardboard. Wells Fargo said its hands were tied by a new federal law requiring dismissal of anyone with past convictions for “transactional crimes” (aimed at identity theft and money-laundering). Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation, which administers the law, has a waiver procedure, but the process is complicated, and Wells Fargo said it feared being fined if it did not terminate Eggers promptly.

MOTOR CITY BLUES Ever since Detroit prosecutor Kym Worthy found 11,000 “rape kits” lying idle on police shelves in 2009, she has been seeking funding to test them. In a progress report in August 2012, of the 400 kits deemed most likely to yield results, 21 “serial rapists” were identified. (Manpower to find the men is unavailable, and yet to be learned is whether any have committed additional rapes since 2009.) And two hours after an early morning multiple-shooting in Detroit on Sept. 1, a 36-year-old man reported to a fire station to turn himself in. But firefighters were unable to persuade police to come arrest him, and eventually, reported WXYZ-TV, the firefighters put the man in a taxi and sent him to a police station.

UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT A 30-year-old man told Providence, R.I., told police in August that he was the victim of a sexual assault, and police are investigating. The man said he had gone to the North Main Street Spa for a professional massage and was unable to avoid a sex act administered by his “masseuse,” “Yo Yo.” (The Providence Journal did not publish his name because he claims to be the victim of a sex crime.)

WEATHER CRIMES In July, Labor Party councillors in the Netherlands demanded that weather forecasters be punished for incorrect predictions–since poor weather drives down resort business, resulting in slower hiring. One hotelier in Hoek van Holland lamented that the forecasters, ironically, were getting worse “[d]espite having more forecasting tools than ever before.” A week before that, tourist managers in Belgium reportedly called for “less pessimistic forecasts,” and one urged meteorologists “to pay as much attention to sun as they do to rain.”■ chuck@mauitime.com To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615n3


Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent, to “Eh Brah!” c/o MauiTime, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com

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hanks for messing up our night, DLNR officer. Me, my nephews, my cousin and her boyfriend were all just chilling out at Kahului Harbor, doing a bit of night fishing near the boat ramp and not bothering no one when you showed up. You basically whined and bitched and moaned about how we were apparently keeping the little fishes we had in our bucket. We tried to tell you that we weren’t, that we were gonna let ‘em go before we went home. But no, you just had to take my nephew over to your truck, lecture him and then give him a ticket and a court date! Really, you just had to? You messed up our night while you could’ve done something better like check on the people near the shoreline who were blasting music, drinking and making lots of loud noise. How about the families who were out with their little children run around all over the place at nearly 11pm? Don’t you think that would’ve been the better call to make? ■

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Complaints about sugar cane burns are flooding the county and EPA. But will anything change? By Anthony Pignataro

PHOTO BY SEAN M. HOWER

F

rom March to November each year, Hawaiian Commercial & Sugar (HC&S) burns about 400 acres of its sugarcane every week. That comes to about 70 acres a day– roughly the size of the Disneyland theme park in Anaheim, California. The burning takes place, according to the company’s website (hcsugar.com), because it is “the only economical means HC&S has found to-date” of removing dried, leafy material from the cane–material that doesn’t contain sucrose and would reduce “the amount of sucrose that can be recovered by the factory if it is not removed prior to harvest.” As old photos on mounted on the second floor walls of the old Lahaina Courthouse attest, Maui’s sugar growers have harvested cane in this manner for well over a century, and HC&S has repeatedly stated that it has no plans to stop it anytime soon. In fact, cane burning has gone on so long that it’s become part of Maui’s identity. Like watching the Maui Fair parade, honking your horn in the Pali tunnel or devouring a

10 SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

pastry from Komoda’s Bakery, the burning of sugar cane has reached the level of tradition in the minds of many locals. Yet at the same time, all that smoke and haze caused by burning all that sugar has irritated the eyes, noses, throats and lungs of Maui residents for about as long as HC&S workers have torched cane fields. Many who live here aren’t affected, but for those who are, cane burns can be hellish experiences. These are not the gripes of people who just moved to Maui and are shocked– Shocked!–to see that there’s cane burning going on. These are thoughtful complaints from residents, people who live here, pay taxes here, send their children to school here. They live here, and have every right to express their unhappiness with sugar cane harvest practices, regardless of how long they’ve been in practice. Of course, people have always complained about cane burns, but lately it seems that they’re complaining more than ever. Maui County Environmental Coordinator Rob Parsons says his office has received more than 100 such complaints in the last

month or so–complaints that will be passed on to the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, which (at least, on paper) will consider them when it comes time to approve HC&S’ 2013 burn permit. Because of the importance of this issue, we’ve reprinted a small sampling of those complaints below, which we obtained both from Parsons (who first requested permission from the complainee) and from the group Maui Tomorrow, which has also been collecting cane burn complaints from residents. A few people requested anonymity, but for the most part, the complaints that follow are from people who chose to identify themselves. They represent a variety of lifestyles and points of views, but all share one trait: they want the burns to end. If you wish to file your own complaint, there are detailed instructions at stopcaneburning.org. You can also attend a rally to protest cane burning, which will take place at the corner of Mokulele Highway and Dairy Road (near the commuter lots) on Saturday, Sept. 29 from 10-11:15am.

The age of timber, railroad and other rapacious “Barons” ended a long time ago.Yet on Maui, the populace still suffers the depredations of the sugar industry which claims unendingly that non-burning harvesting is uneconomical. Recently however, HC&S harvested two large fields adjacent to Kealia pond mechanically. Were it not economically advantageous, had they faced losing money, they would doubtless have let the crop wither and die. About the same time, I had to drive to Kahului to escape one of the most densely smokefilled period I have experienced in my 12 years on island. In doing so, I saw three cane fires to the south of Mokulele Highway. For two straight days, I coughed incessantly until I began to see blood specks in the resulting sputum. Frankly, I do not give a piper’s damn whether the archaic methods of the sugar growers brings them greater riches. It is beyond time to stop that literally sickening burning process. I am certain that if necessary, fruit, nut and even hardwood trees could generate considerable income from land now devoted to sugar. We import around 90 percent of the vegetables consumed here. Why not convert the land to correct that and


probably concurrently reduce the massive amounts of water needed to cultivate cane? We are already over pumping the aquifers, bringing salt and dirt into our homes for approximately the past eight years. (I have taken pictures of the incrustations on one plumbing fixture). -Richard Mealey Aloha, My name is Sharon and I’ve lived here in Maui for several years. I and many of my friends have been suffering in many adverse health ways from the cane burning for many years now. I understand it is most effective to let you know a specific incident, so here it is: On Friday, Sept. 8 and Thursday, Sept. 13, I awoke to lots of cane burning smoke at 7am in Kihei. I could see it all in the valley as well. It was awful! It smelled horrible, made my eyes, throat and lungs burn, gave me a headache and made me dizzy. Please protect me and many others here on Maui from the cane smoke. There’s got to be a better alternative. I know it is harmful because of how sick it makes me and many others. Let me know what you plan to do to protect the citizens of Maui. -Sharon Aloha Ladies and Gentleman, today yet another burning Sept. 17, 2012 where the smoke engulfed the South Kihei area and the drive to the airport. The smell was so bad I had to use my inhaler and we again had to keep all our windows and doors shut in our home and in the car. I hope these complaints reach the movers and shakers of this community and Maui becomes the paradise it should be without cane burning. -Hunt Decker To all who may be concerned about cane smoke on Maui, I wanted to lodge a formal complaint about the ill-effect that cane smoke had on me today, Tuesday, Sept.18, 2012. I am in excellent health and am not currently sick with a cold or other respiratory disease, yet I have been coughing nonstop today, beginning around 11am. As my windshield was covered with cane ashes this morning, I assume that my cough is due to cane burning, as it has been multiple times in the past. This coughing is particularly disruptive as my job as a radiologist requires me to dictate for approximately nine hours straight per day. The coughing not only irritates my throat, making dictating painful, but it slows my productivity. As a physician, I make a decent salary and I mention this as I pay a great deal of money in taxes for the state, which I am happy to do. However, if I can’t do my job effectively because of the constant coughing, I may have to move. If I move, it will likely be out of Hawaii. I work and live in Kihei. On Keawakapu beach this morning, I visited with two retirees from California who spend a few months out of the year on Hawaii, on different islands. They noticed the cane smoke and were talking about not coming to Maui for one of their months out of the year because they stated that the smoke made them cough and “feel lousy.” It has not been the first time that I have heard tourists complain about the cane smoke. I encouraged them to lodge a formal complaint regarding this issue. I have small children and although I love otherwise living on Maui, I feel irrespon-

sible as a parent to continue to subject them to forced inhalation of cane smoke. I hope that those in charge of making decisions regarding the burning of cane on Maui also feel some responsibility to care for the health and welfare of its citizens. -Name withheld at author’s request Aloha, I would like to make a formal complaint against the cane burning on Maui. I live in North Kihei and my family has been affected yearly by the smoke and dust from the sugar cane fields. School started on July 30, 20112 and my second grade daughter has been sick with asthma almost the whole school year. What is my daughter supposed to do at recess and lunch when they are burning cane? The school does not have accommodations for this. The whole student body can’t stay in when the school is blanketed with smoke and ash. I have to rely on my daughter’s teacher to allow her to stay in class at recess, but the teacher has to go to lunch, so where should

vog on Friday, she has been home bound all weekend and her asthma is too bad for her to go to school. I am an independent contractor, so I don’t get sick pay when I stay home with my children. It may cost HC&S profit to change their farming practices, but think of all the other businesses that won’t be paying sick leave due to cane smoke related illnesses. My husband grew up in the sugar plantation housing. His father and many family members worked for the mill in Lahaina. I understand and respect the history of this business, but it can be done without damaging our environment and poisoning our children. I have lived in North Kihei for 17 years, I don’t love the dust, but I can handle that, the smoke is doing the most damage and making my family sick. Does human life really mean less than the dollar to HC&S and the county officials? I beseech you all to do the right thing. -A.I. The smoke from burning cane causes me

“One company holds our clean air hostage. This must stop. It’s an insult to every living thing on this island.” my baby go then? The impact is so large, teachers are being asked to care for children on their breaks without getting compensated, schools lose federal money every day a child misses school, parents lose income when they stay home with sick children, businesses lose money when the staff stays home with sick children. This isn’t just about the HC&S employees that could be affected by changing farming practices; it affects every resident on Maui, every business on Maui and every visitor who comes here. We can sue the cigarette companies for second hand smoke damage, but HC&S gets to disregard the negative effects of farming this way. I don’t wish the demise of HC&S, I want them to DO THE RIGHT THING and use cleaner farming practices. Today, Sept. 10, like so many other days, my house was full of smoke, in the early morning hours. My daughter started coughing, her biggest asthma indicator, at about 5:30. I don’t have AC and rely of open windows and ceiling fans to keep my house cool. So my choice is to close the windows and circulate the smoke already in my house or leave them open and pray that fresh air will be coming shortly. Today, the smoke was better than it has been during August, but it is the accumulative affects that her immune system just can’t handle indefinitely. Today my daughter is home sick, after weeks of burning and the addition of the

great discomfort and aggravation. When I wake up on the morning of a cane burn I have to keep my windows shut because the air surrounding the home that I own is filled with smoke. I do not have an air conditioner and I need to open my windows to keep the house cool. The smoke burns my eyes, nose and throat. I find it hard to breath and it causes me to be nauseous for hours after the smoke has blown away. I support business on Maui and like to know that HC&S is profitable and employing people here on Maui. HOWEVER, the success of this company should not be at the expense of the health of the citizens of Maui county. Air quality is more important than the profits and success of HC&S. I believe we can have both healthy businesses and healthy citizens here on the island of Maui. Please take responsible steps to move us all forward. Thank you for your time. -Erik Engstrom This year I have gotten congestion and a very bad cough every time the cane has burned. I have this right now. It has been about one week now.Today the date is Sept. 8, 2012. I live in Pukalani where they are burning a lot of cane. At times it has a very burning plastic smell. I work in the tourist industry and I have to miss work when my symp-

toms get too bad. Please make them try a different way to harvest the cane. -Deborah Davenport I am writing to register a complaint about today’s open air burn of sugar cane by HC&S on Maui. I didn’t see the actual flames, but I feel them in my sinuses and lungs.The burn occurred somewhere along the Haleakala Highway, near the Kahului Airport. By 7am, the island’s central valley was covered in a blanket of brownish smoke.This morning happened to be windless. Instead of rising in a plume, the smoke settled down across the valley, visibly affecting the towns of Kihei, Kahului, Puunene, Paia, and Haliimaile, and Pukalani.The smoke layer was so thick that it completely obscured the right side of Haleakala from view from Paia Bay.To add insult to injury, a helicopter equipped with a pesticide spray rig buzzed Paia Bay.This only served to remind me of what is in the smoke that I’m breathing: pesticides, plastic and noxious particulates. Four hours later, the smoke hasn’t completely dissipated. My eyes are burning and my throat is tight and constricted. I live in Paia and honestly, I could write nearly the same letter every day between the months of March and November. I wake at 5am every morning and witness as many as three burns a day during “burn season.” On several occasions this year the smoke has been so thick in my neighborhood that I’ve had to use my car’s fog lights when leaving. I’ve actually been woken up by the smoke in my house. Twice I’ve scooped up my dog and left my home simply to find somewhere to breathe. Some burns seem much worse than others, due to wind conditions, but all leave a residue in the air. Whether the smoke plume rises straight up or the smoke settles in a thick blanket across the island, a sickening brown layer of pollution hangs in horizon late into the afternoon. One company holds our clean air hostage. This must stop. It’s an insult to every living thing on this island. Please do whatever you can in your professional capacity to help regulate or bring an end to this savage misuse of our most precious public resource: air. -Shannon Wianecki Please stop this unhealthy, filthy, costly and abusive [practice for] those with chemical sensitivities (and medical needs)... by STOPPING or helping to CAUSE THE STOPPING OF THE CANE BURNING ON MAUI. HERE IS MY DOCUMENTATION of the fallout where I used to live in Kihei: http://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=ahoe8pJyNQU I COULD NOT TAKE THE SMOKE ANYMORE AND WAS FORCED TO MOVE! -Peter Rosen Cane smoke came into my house today Sept. 4, 2012 at approximately 5:30am. This is an official complaint. I have [reactive airway disease] RAD (only got it at age 62) which my doctor thinks I got from from last year’s terrible Paia burns. Now even the smallest amount of smoke necessitates use of a rescue inhaler and is a risk to my life. I invite you to imagine what it feels like to try to breathe and be unable to bring air into my lungs. -Karen Chun ■ anthony@mauitime.com + @apignataro To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615L

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Food & Drink

Whole Foods Delivers To Your Door Even if that door is on the island of Lanai BY JEN RUSSO

PHOTO BY SEAN M HOWER

catalog. Then you simply call or email in your grocery list. Then an employee at the market in Kahului does all the shopping. After packing your groceries in ice and cooler bags, the employee puts them on the 3:15 pm ferry, which means Lanai residents have to show up at 4pm and pick up their items. Whole Foods is also working on putting in place a similar system for Molokai. Of course, this plan is only up and running a few days a week–the first and third Tuesdays of each month, to be exact. “Our understanding is that there are other companies providing a similar delivery service but are unable to beat the quality of product from our store as well as our prices,” says Ditzel. “The fees we have seen from other companies average around $250 and up in com-

Ready to deliver

WHOLE FOODS 70 Kaahumanu Avenue Kahului, HI 96732 (808) 872-3310

PHOTO BY SEAN M HOWER

Someone must really be hungry

PHOTO BY SEAN M HOWER

O

ver on Lanai a couple week ago I discovered a new program that Whole Foods Market Kahului was promoting. The store’s plan is to take their groceries to Lanai residents for $49.95 on the Expeditions Ferry. Given the small population on the island, Lanai grocery markets are very small and can only offer so much. For residents with special dietary needs or those who would simply like more grocery

options, Whole Foods Market delivery is a huge step forward. “Whole Foods Market is proud to offer the best in locally grown and produced ingredients and products,” says Elyse Ditzel, marketing director for Whole Foods Market Kahului. “The quality and variety that is available instore is hard to beat. We are especially excited to be able to offer not only locally grown produce from more than 75 farms throughout Hawaii but also provide foodstuffs for customers with any dietary restrictions including gluten free options, soy free, nut free and even vegetarian and vegan desserts.” Pretty much all you need is the Internet to browse their 10-page list of what the Maui store offers. But if you lack connectivity, the store will mail you a

tentially interested Lanai residents to visit our store for a special store tour and lunch,” explains Ditzel. “We plan to offer another special tour and visit to Lanai residents to our store in the near future. Anyone interested in participating as our guests should email Carol at sp.mmm.personal.shopping@ wholefoods.com or call the store at 808-872-3310. We also offer a general overview of items available online for customers to review in an effort to become more familiar with our brands and types of foods offered. However, the list is not exhaustive and if there is any particular item that is not listed we very often can place a special order for that customer.” Whole Foods also offers their personal shopper and concierge services to Maui residents. You can either choose

Whole lotta cheese

parison to our flat $49.99 fee. Also with Whole Foods Market, there is no minimum or maximum order required. We are more than happy to do all of the leg work and bring delicious, fresh ingredients to the people of Lanai.” What’s more, you don’t have to know any name brands. Whole Foods will suggest easy and simple substitutions for brands or value items in whatever category you’re shopping. Carol Collier is in charge of the market’s Personal Shopping and Concierge, and can walk customers through their shopping via email or over the phone. After sending in their grocery lists, all customers will receive a follow-up phone call to approve final costs and delivery time. The products purchased are paid for via credit card over the phone. “We recently ferried over several po-

to have them shop your list and pick it up yourself for a service fee of $15, or you can opt to have them deliver it to your home (delivery costs for that service vary). You can order prepared foods like pizza and deli items as well. But don't expect alcohol delivery anytime soon–their great selection of beer, wine and distilled beverages are only available to those who pick up their purchase in person with ID in hand at the Kahului location. For more information, visit wholefoodsmarket.com/stores/maui. ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso For more foodie news, visit MauiTime’s food blog at: mauidish.com To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615d1

SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

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Food & Drink

Big Changes At The Sheraton Maui Resort and Spa BY JEN RUSSO

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f you haven’t had the chance to see the Sheraton Maui Resort and Spa’s renovations, completed at the beginning of the year, it’s time to stop in. The resort introduced new Executive Chef Greg Gaspar recently as Chef Bryan Ashlock moved on to Kauai after 30 years with Starwood Hawaii. Gaspar will be a breath of fresh air in the resort’s Food and Beverage department, and will change-up his classical French cuisine training by adding his own Filipino and Asian influences to the menu. “I plan to go back to basics,” says Gaspar. “Traditional styles on food preparation, but with less filling dishes, no or little accompaniments such as starches and no heavy saucing on plates to mass the flavors. Clean and simple, but eye appealing, with powerful taste and flavor that are not too overwhelming.” The resort has also joined the digital world and added wi-fi in every guest room with their latest renovation. Their wireless environment continues into a social environment at the Link Lounge, where Sheraton has just launched a wine tasting program featuring bottles rated 90 or high on the Wine Spectator list. Two ounce pours are just $5 at the social which runs 5:30-6:30pm Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Open to the public, it’s geared to attract 20 to 30 attendees at a time. “There are brief tasting notes provided for each pour, and the staff present is also trained in the particulars of the wines featured,” says Brandon Maeda, Director of Food and Beverage. “The wines are chosen from the Southern Wine & Spirits portfolio; two must be rated 85 or above, two must be 90 or higher by Wine Spectator. You may also enjoy these wines at Black Rock Steak & Seafood or at the Link at any time.” Maeda says this is the perfect opportunity to segue into dining opportunities on property. Chef Gaspar hosts a culinary demo on Tuesdays at 3pm where you can ask about sustainability and tour the back of the house and main kitchen. “Farm to Table concepts are an expectation of our guests and at Sheraton Maui Resort & Spa, in addition to our menu creations we also offer a complimentary weekly Chef’s Culinary Tour,” says Gaspar. “In sourcing locally grown produce, we include this in with interaction with our guests. Right now, we are utilizing local farms here on Maui to develop my menus: farm-raised Big Island shrimp and Treje Farms of Kula, which are known for their eggplant, fresh island herbs and Chinese long beans.” Another kind of chef’s demonstration is the preparation of food table-side at the Teppan-yaki Dan restaurant. Sheraton Maui has a special for dinner for two for $60 that includes veggies, salads, dipping sauces,

Chef Greg Gaspar

main course and dessert. Or you may just want to try some of Chef Gaspar’s items at Black Rock Steak and Seafood. Their special runs from 5:30-6:30pm and features a buy-one-get-one-half-off deal. Look for Gaspar’s special dish that includes a seared cut of sashimi grade ahi, dusted with his signature five-pepper spice and served on a bed of Fettuccine Alfredo with lots of fresh ground black pepper, freshly shaved Parmesan Regginao cheese, just enough sauce to coat the noodles and a hint of freshly grated nutmeg. Another new program just offered at the resort includes an intimate dinner for two under the stars called the Hale Pilialoha. It’s as romantic as you can get, with a multicourse dinner with tropical inspired cocktails, a Maui sunset, your own personal butler and a table for two in a private spot on their lush property. This is a perfect opportunity to get down on one knee and pop the question or celebrate anniversaries and birthdays. Susan Havens, Director of Sales and Marketing says the Cliff Dive bar is still offering their great happy hours, too. “Kaanapali’s best ocean view Happy Hour starts every day from 10-12 at the Mai Tai Bar, featuring Stoli cocktails starting at $6, and at our Cliff Dive Bar from 3-5pm, featuring $7 tropicals, $5 draft beers, including our signature Black Rock Lager, made exclusively for the Sheraton Maui Resort & Spa by Maui Brewing Company,” she says. “The Black Rock Lager embodies its name by beginning with crisp yet shallow bitterness and slightly smooth and roasted malt flavors before rising to a heavenly floral and spicy finish. An American Dark Lager, the Black Rock Lager contains 5.5 percent alcohol and 25 IBUs. Guests can enjoy this deceptively dark yet rewarding craft beer while watching history come to life as the Sheraton Maui Resort & Spa reenacts the legendary Cliff Dive Ceremony every evening at sunset.” ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso For more foodie news, visit MauiTime’s food blog at: mauidish.com To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615d2


Food & Drink

DOH Institutes New Restaurant Inspection System For Maui

PHOTO BY SEAN M HOWER

BY JEN RUSSO

Chef Cameron Lewark in Spago Maui's Kitchen

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ublic hearings are expected around December for the Hawaii Department of Health (DOH)’s new placard program. The DOH is also instituting an online electronic inspection system that the public will be able to access. Starting soon, DOH inspectors will take an electronic tablet with them on inspections, which will allow them to update restaurant inspection records in real time. “Hopefully, we will have the new code signed into law by early next year,” says Peter Oshiro, DOH Environmental Health Sanitation Branch Manager. “Maui has three inspectors in the field and that’s expected to go up. The electronic system will update in real time as inspectors are in the field. We have started entering the inspections in real time this month in Oahu, so after we get the data in the system and test it we will be able to release the website to the public.” Put simply, the new system awards a colorcoded card that would sit in an establishment’s window. Green means the restaurant has passed, yellow indicates violations that need correction and red means that the establishment has been shut down until corrections are finished. Oshiro says new inspectors will be hired to keep up with the inspections. Right now, a shortage of inspectors means that inspectors check out restaurants only about once every two and a half years. Oshiro says his office’s goal is to inspect establishments three times a year. Of course, all these new inspectors and inspections will come at a cost. The new code will institute substantially higher fees for permits. Currently, permits run $25 to $150, but that will increase to the $100600 range, depending on an establishment’s size and operations. “Right now Maui is still running on Chapter 12 code, but hopefully Chapter 50 will be adopted by the end of the year,” says Patty Kitkowski, Program Director for Maui’s Environmental Health department. “The new code adopts a lot of things from the Federal Drug Administration’s food code. We don’t have our slates [tablets] yet, and they are testing the system in Oahu before they bring it to Maui. I have two inspectors on Maui and one on Molokai right now.”

Kitkowski says she will eventually hire four more inspectors for her department, bringing the total to seven. When the new code gets signed into law, Oshiro says the priority for inspections will be to reinspect within 24 hours after a yellow card is put up so restaurants can get cleared to green. He says routine inspections will be a second priority. Reaction from Maui restaurant owners to the new inspection plan seems, at least for now, to be positive. “I think it’s great because it keeps everyone honest,” says Mark Ellman, the chef and owner of Mala Ocean Tavern, Honu and Mala Wailea. “You get an opinion of a safety professional to help you run a safer kitchen.” Rolf Egli, owner of Maui Swiss Cafe in Lahaina, agrees. “It’s about time!" he says. "I think this is just a great idea. In my view there are still to many restaurants around where it is a good thing that you don’t see in the kitchen. I believe customers should have the right to know how clean a kitchen is. For me that is always number one priority and I am proud about our clean kitchen. So I’m looking forward to this new system and that our guests can see how clean everything is.” You can see a summary of the proposed rules and how it could affect restaurants at the TOBE Co. Food Safety website. The company conducts food safety training and can be hired to inspect a restaurant’s kitchen as well. They have a complete copy of the code on their website at tobecofoodsafety.com. Chris Speere, the External Program Coordinator at the Maui Culinary Academy, says this is a positive change for the island and that the school will properly prepare students for the change. “At the Maui Culinary Academy, our faculty is extremely motivated and tasked to instill the highest standards of food handling, safety and sanitation practices into our students daily practices, says Speere. “Our culinary students are directed to meet nationally recognized standards in Food Safety through a proctored ServSafe certification process that is embedded into our programs mandatory Sanitation and Safety course. It is in the Maui Culinary Academy’s best interest along with our entire restaurant industry to protect our dinning public and our islands exemplary reputation as a leading destination for for sourcing and serving world class cuisine that is not only innovative and flavorful but also safe, healthy and wholesome.” ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso For more foodie news, visit MauiTime’s food blog at: mauidish.com To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1615d3

SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

15


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Picks

BY MARINA SATOAFAIGA @sandtothecity

PHOTO BY TONYA MILLER

THURSDAY, SEPT. 27 MARTY DREAD – Known as Hawaii’s Reggae Ambassador, Marty Dread was born in Bronx, NY and moved with his family to Maui at the age of eight. Launching his career in the early 1990s, Marty has collaborated with Willie Nelson and Fiji. He returns to Lahaina this Thursday after three years to root for a cause. Ten percent of the proceeds will go to GMO Free Maui’s efforts to promote local and diverse ecological food and farm practices. The evening also doubles as Marty’s It Sometimes Rains In Paradise CD release party and will open with DJ Boomshot. $10. 9:30pm. Longhi’s Lahaina (888 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-2288; longhis.com.

KAMAKOA LINDSEY AND PI‘ILANI ARIAS – Lahaina Restoration Foundation’s Hawaiian Music series is bringing you Kamakoa Lindsey (pictured) and Pi’ilani Arias. Born and raised in Waimea on Ha-en waii Island, Kamakoa draws much inspiration from his roots and has been ias, associated with Ekolu. As the son of famed Hawaiian singer Rodney Arias, Pi’ilani’s talent and voice capabilities have proven undeniable. Come and enjoy an evening with two of Maui’s brightest musical stars. Chairs are limited so bring 20 blankets or low-laying beach chairs. Free. 6-7:30pm. Baldwin Home (120 Dickenson St., Lahaina); 808-661-3262; lahainarestoration.org.

THURSDAY, SEPT. 27 WHISKIES OF THE WORLD – Calling all whiskey enthusiasts! Join whiskey specialist Dr. Thomas Turner for an evening of live entertainment, pupus and, well... whiskey. Turner is a Diageo Master of whiskey whose passion for spirits has further deepened his knowledge. Brand names will include Crown Royal Black, Bulleit Bourbon, Bushmills, Johnnie Walker Black and Talisker. Chef James of Mulligans will also pair each whiskey with appetizers. Space is limited so call ahead to reserve a spot. $50. Mulligans on the Blue (100 Kaukahi St, Wailea); 808-874-1131; mulligansontheblue.com.

MAUI FAIR – Celebrating its 90th year, the Maui Fair attracts locals and tourist alike. The event features the E.K. Fernandez Joy Zone, the 5th annual Robo Tech Maui Expo and Competition, a massive array of multicultural food (all of which benefits local nonprofit organizations), horticulture, bonsai, homemaking, livestock, photo/art exhibits and competitions. The fair will begin on Thursday with the annual parade at 4:30pm. The Events Arena will feature Maui Martial Arts, Hot Hula (zumba), Maui Taiko Drums, professional dog training and more. It’s the fair! You gotta go! $3 (keiki) $7 (adult) ages 4-under (free). War Memorial Complex (700 Halia Nakoa St., Wailuku); mauifair.com.

PHOTO BY DANIEL ZETTERSTROM

FRIDAY, SEPT. 28 BLUETECH – Bluetech’s special brand of electronica is here for a special two-night journey. The Friday show at Longhi’s in Lahaina will feature local DJ Boogiemeister’s downtempo to mid tempo groovin’ deep soul set and DJ Deviant’s delicious downtempo delights. Don’t miss out on the live painting, percussion and visuals by FuzzBox. Ten percent of proceeds will go to GMO free Maui. FRIDAY: $10. Longhi’s (888 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-2288. SATURDAY: 9:30pm. $15. Casanova’s (1188 Makawao Ave.); 808-572-0220; Origins-BeatsBazaar.com.

DOUBT AT PRO-ARTS – Winner of the Pulitzer Prize for Drama and the Tony Award for Best Play in 2005, ProArts Playhouse in Kihei is presenting Doubt: A Parable. The story takes place in the early 1960s and concerns a struggle between charismatic and progressive Father Flynn and Principal Sister Aloysius Beauvier, an iron-glove who believes in fear and discipline. Directed by Kristi Scott and produced by Jonathan Lehman. Mature Audience. Show runs Sept. 28 to Oct. 14. Thu. Fri. & Sat. at 7:30pm and Sun. at 3pm. $20.00. Kamaaina Nights Sept. 29, Oct. 4 and Oct. 11. ProArts Playhouse, Azeka Shopping Center (1280 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-463-6550; proartspacific.com.

FRIDAY, SEPT. 28 FOUR SEASONS BREWHAHA – Here’s your chance to taste 14 brews from across the globe. Four Season Resorts is hosting the 2nd annual Brewhaha East vs. West where Asia and Europe’s top-shelf beers go head-to-head at this oceanfront party. This year there will be brews from Japan, Australia and India against Belgium, Germany, Scotland and England. Guests will be the judges and the side with the most cheers gets the bragging rights. Chef of the Year Roger Stettler will craft a menu to complement the brews and pay homage to each country of origin. 6:30pm8:30pm. $79 plus tax. Four Seasons Resort Maui (3900 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-874-2201; fourseasons.com/maui.

AUGIE T’S SUMMER OF LOL – Get ready to laugh-out-loud. Augie T reunites the fellas of the Na Ali’i of Comedy at the MACC for a final summertime fling this Friday. Joining him onstage are comedic legends Frank De Lima, Mel Cabang and Andy Bumatai. Entertaining Hawaii for over 30 years, De Lima is a staple in Hawaii’s entertainment along with philanthropic scene. As an entrepreneur and comic, Mel Cabang has been in Hawaii for over 40 years with spot appearances on multiple television programs. An iconic fixture in Hawaii’s comedic scene, Bumatai has opened for Kenny Loggins, The Beach Boys and Lionel Richie. $30/standard, $40/premium with meet-and-greet. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-2787, mauiarts.org.

FRIDAY, SEPT. 28

SATURDAY, SEPT. 29 MAUI BREW CO. HELPS FOREST BIRDS – Maui Brewing Company is dedicating an evening to the birds. The Maui Forest Bird Recovery Project to be exact. The MFRB helps recover Maui’s endangered birds and to restore their habitats through research, development and conservation. MFRB has been around since 1997 and its research efforts are centered on the recovery of the Maui Parrotbill (Kiwikiu). Native to the forest of Haleakala, the parrotbill are endangered. Half of the night’s pint sales will go to the Benefit. 6pm-midnight. Maui Brewing Company. (4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina); 808-573-0280; mauiforestbirds.org; mauibrewingco.com.

THE VANDALS – Inspired by the Descendants and Dickies, the Vandals have survived two decades as a catchy punk-pop group. The Orange County natives’ diverse sounds catapulted the band into fame. Consider them the forefathers of Blink-182 and Offspring. And now they’re gonna rock The Hard Rock Cafe. 21+. 9pm. $18 (GA). Hard Rock Cafe (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-7400; underworldevents. com; facebook.com/underworldevents.

SATURDAY, SEPT. 29 MOKU‘ULA PROJECT DAY – The Friends of Moku‘ula will gather this Saturday for the 19th annual National Public Lands Day. Moku‘ula means “Sacred Island” in Hawaiian. FOM takes that seriously, and is trying to raise awareness of the Hawaiian culture through the restoration, preservation, education and revitalization of the old Moku‘ula and Mokuhinia ponds. Volunteers will take part in removing invasive species, spreading mulch, planting native species and cleaning up debris. Free. 8am-12pm. Meet at Moku’ula on Front Street in Lahaina; 808-661-3659; mokuula.com.

CAPTAIN JACK’S BIRTHDAY – It’s Captain Jack’s second anniversary and they’re celebrating pirate-style. While we wish that meant that it was time to enjoy all the mayhem, pillaging and rum you could handle, it’s actually more of a get dressed up in pirate garb kind of thing (eye patches, hand hooks, etc.) and say “Arrr” a lot. But there will be drink specials, live music by Johnny Ringo and dance beats from DJ Scotty D. 9pm-Midnight. Captain Jack’s 808-667-0988. (672 Front St., Lahaina);

SUNDAY, SEPT. 30 CLASSIC CAR SHOW – Devotees to the glamour and mystery of vintage machines will love Peggy Sue’s 17th annual Classic Car Show. All cars are welcome here but only those dating to 1982 and earlier qualify for the Big Brother Big Sister Award. The car show is one of the largest displays of wicked wheels on Maui. There’s live music, games and prizes. You can pre-register your car for $5 or register at the show for $8. Join the Maui Classic Cruisers for car culture all year long, and check out car cruise night the first Saturday night of the month. At the very least, bite into a Cadillac burger with Maui Cattle Co, beef at Peggy Sue’s for a taste of the old days. 11am-4pm. Peggy Sue’s, Azeka Mauka (1279 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-875-8944. (@jenrusso)

MAUI FIREFIGHTERS VS. CHEFS CHILI COOK-OFF – Maui Firefighters are taking on Maui’s best chefs at the 8th Annual Chili Cook-Off. There will be three categories: Traditional (no beans or pasta), Hazmat/Freestyle (anything goes) and Wild Land (vegetarian). The teams will prepare and cook at the Maui Fair Events Arena. Awards and the final presentation will take place at 5pm. The public is invited to sample and vote on the their fave. The people’s choice will walk away with a cash prize of $300. All proceeds will go to Shriners Hospitals d for child patient transportation. The fund gives children who sustain fire-related minjuries proper medical treatment and rehabilitation. $1 (per sample bowl) 4pm6pm. Maui Fair. (700 Halia Nakoa St., Wailuku); mauifair.com.

SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

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Film

Time’s Up Looper promises much but fails to deliver BY BARRY WURST II

Looper ★★★★★ Rated R / 118 Min.

I

n the near future, a process called “looping” takes place, in which time travel is used by the mob as a means of destroying unwanted enemies. Those undesired are sent 30 years into the future, where he will appear in a vacant field, ready to be terminated by a gun toting “looper.” Since those who commit such acts don’t think very far ahead, they enjoy the wealth they accumulate only to later become victims of “closing the loop,” in which they will eventually be cleaned out and erased themselves. Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays Joe, an arrogant, drug addicted and soulless mob enforcer who flinches when he’s assigned to kill his older self, played by Bruce Willis. Instead of pulling the trigger and fulfilling his end of the bargain, Joe finds himself in pursuit of Old Joe, who has a different mission than his younger self. Writer/director Rian Johnson gives us a

feast of sci-fi ideas, film noir attitude and splatters of chunky gore. To describe his film in one word: aggressive. The characters are morally compromised and only thinking of their own survival, while the world around them is dark, unforgiving and flush with secrets. Yep, this is definitely film noir, that reliable genre with the foundation of visual despair, unreliable “heroes” and a story that twists and turns like a snake until the very end. Looper is essentially a mobster chase movie with a time travel twist that feels like its leading towards something truly awesome. Johnson’s first film was the clever high school noir Brick and Willis not only starred in 12 Monkeys, a superior film involving time travel paradoxes, but has gone on record to say he feels this is one of the best he’s made. It’s easy to get your hopes up with this cast and filmmaker but there are some fundamental problems that cause the film to stumble long before the failed wrap-up. Levitt is supposed to look like a young Bruce Willis but actually resembles a gangster from Dick Tracy. He seems so fixated on nailing his Willis impression,

his mannered approach and the make-up get in the way of his acting. Sure, he’s unrecognizable, but his Oh, I totally see the resemblance performance never connects. Willis is in strong form, screenplay’s cruel rules for time travel, but Emily Blunt effectively tackles a role unby the time everyone is running around like any she’s played before and it’s always searching for “the rainmaker,” I was ready nice to see Jeff Daniels and Piper Perabo, for Johnson to wrap things up with a satboth exceptional in character roles. isfying conclusion. He never does and the The violence is harsh, riveting and film falls short of its early promise. appropriately off-putting but the story The far smaller, more low key but betis equally distancing. The details of this ter written and produced Source Code world are unique (criminals are rewarded surpasses this film in creating both excitewith silver and gold bars and drugs are ment, inventive plot developments and, taken through eye drops) but Johnson’s best of all, characters with rooting interest. too-cool-for-the-room style and visuals Likewise, the micro-budgeted Primer is can carry it only so far. one of the best and scariest time travel film About that ending: following a thrilling thrillers of recent years. Looper is certainly shoot-out with Willis in full John McClane ambitious but I can’t recommend a film mode, we get a CGI-heavy finale that is that aims for sci-fi classic status but requite wild but really silly. Instead of walkminds me most of Children of the Corn. ■ ing away enthralled, the final moments underwhelm and the film as a whole left To share or save this article, type: me cold. It’s fun early on to discover the mt.hy.pr/1615f

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Film

Showtimes

WHERE AND WHEN TO WATCH WHAT BY JENNA SCHAMBER

FRONT STREET THEATER

KUKUI MALL

900 Front St., Lahaina, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: M-F until 6:30pm, Sa-Su until 3:30pm, Discount Tue)

1819 S. Kihei Rd., 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm)

End of Watch-R-THU (3:45), 7:05, 9:30. FRI (1:15, 3:45), 7:05, 9:30. SAT-SUN (1:15), 3:45, 7:05, 9:30. MON-WED (3:45), 7:05, 9:30. Hotel Transylvania-PG-FRI (1:15, 3:30), 6:45, 9:15. SAT-SUN (1:15), 3:30, 6:45, 9:15. MON-WED (3:30), 6:45, 9:15. Looper-R-FRI (1:30, 4:15), 7:05, 9:45. SAT-SUN (1:30), 4:15, 7:05, 9:45. MON-WED (4:15), 7:05, 9:45. Resident Evil 5: Retribution-R-THU (4:15), 7:00, 9:15. The Dark Knight Rises-PG13-THU (5:00), 8:30. The Possession-PG13-THU (3:30), 6:45, 9:15. Won’t Back Down-PG-FRI (1:20, 4:15), 7:00, 9:45. SAT-SUN (1:20), 4:15, 7:00, 9:45. MON-WED (4:15), 7:00, 9:45.

Beasts of Southern Wild-PG13-THU 1:15, 3:30. Intouchables-R-FRI-WED 11:10, 1:40, 4:20, 7:15, 10:00. Lawless-G-THU 5:40, 8:30. Looper-R-FRI-WED 11:30, 2:00, 4:30, 7:05, 9:50. Resident Evil 5: Retribution-R-THU 1:45, 4:00, 6:15, 8:30. The Intouchables-R-THU 1:20, 4:10, 6:40, 9:10. Trouble With The Curve-PG13-THU 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:45. FRI-WED 11:20, 1:50, 4:15, 7:00, 9:45. Won’t Back Down-PG-FRI-MON 11:00, 1:45, 4:45, 7:30, 10:10. TUE-WED 1:00, 4:45, 7:30, 10:10.

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, Kahului, 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm)

Arbitrage-R-THU 11:00, 1:45, 4:225, 7:10. FRIWED 11:05, 1:45, 4:25, 7:10, 9:45. Cold Light of Day-PG13-THU 10:50, 1:00, 3:10. Finding Nemo-G-THU 11:45. Finding Nemo 3D-G-THU 2:10, 4:35, 7:00. Hotel Transylvania-PG-FRI-WED 1:05, 3:15, 5:25, 7:35. Hotel Transylvania 3D-PG-FRI-WED 10:55, 9:45. Step Up Revolution 2D-PG13-THU 3:35, 8:00. FRI-WED 12:00, 2:20, 4:40, 7:00. The Bourne Legacy-PG13-THU 11:00, 1:40, 4:20, 7:00. FRI-WED 11:00, 1:40, 4:20, 7:00, 9:40. The Master-R-THU 10:45, 1:40, 4:35, 7:30. FRIWED 10:45, 1:40, 4:35, 7:30, 10:20. The Words-PG13-THU 11:20, 1:30, 5:45. FRIWED 9:15. Total Recall-PG13-THU 5:10, 7:40. FRI-WED 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45.

NEW THIS WEEK HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA - PG - Animation

- Dracula is now operating a resort for monsters, but then some meddling boy shows up and falls for his daughter. Typical. 91 min. LOOPER - R - Sci-Fi/Thriller - Joseph Gor-

don-Levitt plays a mob enforcer who uses a time-machine, but then one day his bosses want him to erase his future self in the past, or his past self in the future. Wait, that won’t work. Anyway, you get the idea. See this week’s film critique. 118 min. WON’T BACK DOWN - PG - Drama/Fantasy

- Two mothers (Viola Davis, Maggie Gyllenhaal) take on education bureaucrats while attempting to fix a broken inner city school. Something tells me this picture makes Looper look believable. 121 min.

NOW PLAYING ARBITRAGE - R - Drama - Richard Gere stars

as a hedge fund manager who messes up and then needs to ask someone for help. 100 min. THE BOURNE LEGACY - PG13 - Action/Ad-

venture - In this Matt Damon-less incarnation of Robert Ludlum’s spy novel, Jeremy Renner plays American super-assassin Aaron Cross. 135 min. DREDD - R - Action/Sci-Fi - In this new take on

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, Kahului, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: M-Th until 6pm, F-Su until 3:30pm)

Dredd-R-THU (2:35). FRI (2:45). SAT-SUN (2:45). MON-WED (2:45). Dredd 3D-R-THU (5:00), 7:25, 9:50. FRI (12:15, 5:00), 7:25, 9:50. SAT-SUN (12:15), 5:00, 7:25, 9:50. MON-WED (5:00), 7:25, 9:50. End of Watch-R-THU (2:20, 4:55), 7:30, 10:00. FRI (11:45, 2:20, 4:55), 7:30, 10:00. SAT-SUN (11:45, 2:20), 4:55, 7:30, 10:00. MON-WED (2:20, 4:55), 7:30, 10:00. Finding Nemo 3D-G-FRI (1:35, 4:05), 6:45. SATSUN (1:35), 4:05, 6:45. MON-WED (1:35, 4:05), 6:45. House At The End Of The Street-PG13-THU (2:10, 4:40), 7:00, 9:25. FRI (11:55, 2:10, 4:40), 7:05, 9:25. SAT-SUN (11:55, 2:10), 4:40, 7:05, 9:25. MON-WED (2:10, 4:40), 7:05, 9:25. Last Ounce of Courage-PG-THU (4:20), 9:05. Lawless-G-THU (1:35, 4:10), 7:05, 9:40. FRI (2:15), 7:10. SAT-SUN (2:15), 7:10. MONWED (2:15), 7:10. Looper-R-FRI (12:45, 1:30, 3:30, 4:15), 6:30, 7:00, 9:15, 9:45. SAT-SUN (12:45, 1:30), 3:30, 4:15, 6:30, 7:00, 9:15, 9:45. MON-WED (1:30,

the old Sly Stallone yawner, Judge Dredd (Karl Urban) dispenses brutal justice in a brutal future ruled by endless sequels and remakes. 95 min. END OF WATCH - R - Drama - Pieced to-

gether with “found footage,” this movie tells the story of two good LA cops who happen upon a heinous crime. 109 min. FINDING NEMO 3D - G - Animation - When

3:30, 4:15), 6:30, 7:00, 9:15, 9:45. Paranorman-PG13-THU (4:15). FRI (11:50, 4:10). SAT-SUN (11:50), 4:10. MON-WED (4:10). Paranorman 3D-PG-THU (1:55), 6:30, 8:45. FRI (1:55), 6:35, 8:45. SAT-SUN (1:55), 6:35, 8:45. MON-WED (1:55), 6:35, 8:45. Premium Rush-PG13-THU (1:50), 6:40. Resident Evil 5: Retribution-R-THU (2:40). FRI (1:45). SAT-SUN (1:45). MON-WED (1:45). Resident Evil 5: Retribution 3D-R-THU (5:05), 7:20, 9:45. FRI (11:35, 4:20), 6:40, 9:05. SAT-SUN (11:35), 4:20, 6:40, 9:05. MON-WED (4:20), 6:40, 9:05. The Expendables 2-R-THU (1:40, 4:25), 6:55, 9:30. The Odd Life of Timothy Green-PG-THU (2:05, 4:30), 6:50, 9:15. FRI (11:40, 2:05, 4:30), 6:50, 9:10. SAT-SUN (11:40, 2:05), 4:30, 6:50, 9:10. MON-WED (2:05, 4:30), 6:50, 9:10. The Possession-PG13-THU (2:15, 4:50), 7:10, 9:35. FRI (12:00, 4:50), 9:40. SAT-SUN (12:00), 4:50, 9:40. MON-WED (4:50), 9:40. Trouble With The Curve-PG13-THU (1:30,

PARANORMAN - PG - Animation/Comedy - Some kid who can talk to the dead goes up against some scary folks to save his town from a curse. 93 min. THE POSSESSION - PG 13 - Horror Some girl buys an antique box at a yard sale, only to find that it contains a seriously malevolent spirit. 92 min. RESIDENT EVIL 5: RETRIBUTION - R - Ac-

HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET -

STEP UP: REVOLUTION - PG13 - Drama -

LAWLESS - R - Crime/Drama - Depression-

era bootleggers are threatened by a crooked Virginia sheriff. Tom Hardy stars, with a screenplay by Nick Cave. 115 min. THE MASTER - R - Drama - Paul Thomas

Anderson wrote and directed this tale of an unsettled naval veteran who meets the charismatic leader of The Cause, which bears remarkable resemblance to Scientology. 137 min. THE ODD LIFE OF TIMOTHY GREEN - PG -

Comedy/Drama - A childless couple dreams of having a baby, and then one day lightning strikes their backyard and out pops a kid with tree branches growing out of his legs. Odd is right. 125 min.

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front St., Lahaina, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: Tue all shows, until 6pm every other day)

Dredd-R-THU (2:00). FRI (2:00, 4:30), 7:05, 9:30. SAT-SUN (2:00), 4:30, 7:05, 9:30. MONWED (2:00, 4:30), 7:05, 9:30. Dredd 3D-R-THU (4:30), 7:05, 9:30. House At The End Of The Street-PG13-THU (1:30, 4:00), 6:30, 9:00. FRI (1:30, 4:00), 6:30, 9:00. SAT-SUN (1:30), 4:00, 6:30, 9:00. MONWED (1:30, 4:00), 6:30, 9:00. Trouble With The Curve-PG13-THU (1:45, 4:20), 7:00, 9:30. FRI (1:45, 4:20), 7:00, 9:30. SAT-SUN (1:45), 4:20, 7:00, 9:30. MON-WED (1:45), 4:20, 7:00, 9:30.

Hotel Transylvania opens this week

a little clown fish named Nemo is captured, his dad Marlin (Albert Brooks) and Dory (Ellen DeGeneres) go looking for him. 100 min. PG13 - Horror - A mom and daughter move next door to some kid whose sister murdered her parents. Hilarity ensues. 101 min.

2:00, 4:05, 4:35), 6:45, 7:15, 9:20, 9:55. FRI (11:30, 2:00, 4:35), 7:15, 9:20, 9:55. SAT-SUN (11:30, 2:00), 4:35, 7:15, 9:20, 9:55. MON-WED (2:00, 4:35), 7:15, 9:20, 9:55. Won’t Back Down-PG-FRI (12:30, 3:15), 6:15, 9:00. SAT-SUN (12:30, 3:15), 6:15, 9:00. MON-WED (3:15), 6:15, 9:00.

tion/Horror - Alice (Milla Jovovich) is still fighting zombies and evil corporations. 95 min. Emily moves to Miami to become a professional dancer, then totally falls for dance crew leader Sean who lives in a neighborhood Emily’s land developer pop may demolish. 97 min TOTAL RECALL - PG13 - Action/Sci-Fi - This remake of the Arnold Schwarzenegger flick, which was based on a Philip K. Dick story, concerns one Douglas Quaid (Colin Farrell), who tries to take a mental vacation, only to wake up and find everything he knows about himself may have been a lie. 118 min. TROUBLE WITH THE CURVE - PG13 - Drama - Clint Eastwood plays an ailing baseball scout who takes his daughter (and perhaps a dining room set) on a final recruiting outing. 111 min. THE WORDS - PG 13 - Drama - A successful

writer pays a tough price for plagiarism. 96 min.

LAST CHANCE BEASTS OF SOUTHERN WILD - PG 13 Drama/Fantasy - Hushpuppy is just six but has to deal with a flooding bayou, a dying father and the rise of a bunch of ancient wild cattle. 93 min. COLD LIGHT OF DAY - PG 13 - Action/Thriller - A young Wall Street trader must deal with the intelligence agents who kidnapped his family while looking for a stolen briefcase. 93 min. THE DARK KNIGHT RISES - PG13 - Action Christian Bale returns as the Batman to fight the menacing mercenary Bane (Tom Hardy) and Catwoman (Anne Hathaway) in this final installment of Christopher Nolan’s trilogy. 164 min. THE EXPENDABLES 2 - R - Action - All your

favorite aging action heroes are back (including Stallone, Statham, Willis, Li and Ahnold!), and this time they blow up approximately one-quarter of the Earth’s surface. 102 min. LAST OUNCE OF COURAGE - PG - Melodrama - A small town mayor loses his son to war, then decides the nation isn’t Christian or patriotic enough for his tastes. 101 min. PREMIUM RUSH - PG 13 - Action/Thriller A Manhattan bike messenger (Joseph GordonLevitt) picks up an envelope that gets him a lot of unwanted attention from a dirty cop. 93 min.

SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

21


Calendar

Da Kine Calendar BY JENNA SCHAMBER

BIG SHOWS MARTY DREAD AND FRIENDS - Thu, Sep 27. See picks on p. 17 for info. $10 at door. 9:30pm Longhi’s Lahaina, (888 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-2288; longhis.com AUGIE T’S SUMMER OF LOL - Fri, Sep 28. See picks on p. 17 for info. $30/standard, $40/premium with meet-and-greet. 7:30-11pm Maui Arts & Cultural Center, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org THE VINCE ESQUIRE BAND - Fri, Sep 28. A live set by power trio, The Vince Esquire Band, who bring a perfect combination of rock, blues, jam and funk to their performances. No cover. 8-11pm McGrath’s Hang Loose Lounge, (333 Dairy Rd., Kahului); 808-8776284; facebook.com/vinceesquireband BLUETECH - Fri, Sep 28. See picks on p. 17 for info. $10 at door; 10 percent of proceeds go to GMO Free Maui. 9:30pm Longhi’s Lahaina, (888 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-2288; bluetechonline.com; bioniclove@gmail.com A FAREWELL BASH FOR ERIN MILLER Sat, Sep 29. Erin Miller, a beloved bartender at Diamonds, is leaving the island for Chicago and the crew at Diamonds want to throw her a night to remember, Maui-style. Music from DJ Illz and DJ Benjamin Jay, and $5 Jameson specials all night. No Cover. 9pm Diamonds Ice Bar & Grill, (1279 S. Kihei Rd. #314); 808-874-9299 THE VANDALS - Sat, Sep 29. Opening sets by Happy Haoles and Satterday Saints. See picks on p. 17 for info. $18 (plus service fees). Advance tickets available online or at the following locations: Hard Rock (Lahaina), Vanity Salon (Paia) and Goldfinch Body Art (Lahaina). 9pm The Hard Rock Cafe, (900 Front St., Lahaina); 877-7147668; tinyurl.com/vandals-maui BLUETECH - Sat, Sep 29. See picks on p. 17 for info. $15 at door; 10% of proceeds go to GMO Free Maui. 9:30pm Casanova, (1188 Makawao Ave.); 808-572-0220; bluetechonline.com SLACK KEY SHOW – MASTERS OF HAWAIIAN MUSIC WITH DANIEL HO - Wed, Oct 3. George Kahumoku Jr. hosts this Grammy Award-winning concert series featuring Daniel Ho, contemporary slack key guitar, ukulele and vocals. Co-hosted by Da Ukulele Boyz, Sterling Seaton and Wainani Kealoha. $37.99-78.35; 7:30-9:30pm Napili Kai Beach Resort Aloha Pavilion, (5900 L. Honoapiilani Rd.); 808-669-3858; slackkey.com

STAGE DOUBT: A PARABLE - Fri, Sep 28 through Sun, Oct 14. See picks on p. 17 for info. $20. ProArts Playhouse, (1280 S. Kihei Rd.); 808463-6550; proartspacific.com GALA OPENING OF RE-UNITE! - Fri, Sep 28 & Sat, Sep 29. See MauiSphere on p. 7 for info. $25 adults, $20 seniors & students. 7pm Seabury Hall, (480 Olinda Rd., Makawao); 808-573-1257

22 SEPTEMBER 27, 2012

FOODIE WHISKIES OF THE WORLD TASTING Thu, Sep 27. See picks on p. 17 for info. Limited seating. $50 per person. 6:30-8:30pm Mulligan’s on the Blue, (100 Kaukahi St., Wailea); 808-874-1131; mulligansontheblue.com BENEFIT NIGHT FOR THE BIRDS - Fri, Sep 28. See picks on p. 17 for info. 6pm Maui Brewing Co. Brewpub, (Kahana Gateway Center, 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana); 808-573-0280; mauiforestbirds.org; laura@mauiforestbirds.org 2ND ANNUAL BREWHAHA: EAST VS WEST - Fri, Sep 28. See picks on p. 17 for info. $79 plus tax and gratuity per person. 6:30-8:30pm Four Seasons Resort, (3900 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-874-2201; fourseasons.com/maui; concierge.maui@ fourseasons.com 8TH ANNUAL CHILI COOK-OFF AT MAUI FAIR - Sun, Sep 30. See picks on p. 17 for info. Admission into fair plus $1 per bowl. 4-6pm. Events Arena at the Maui Fair, (War Memorial Gymnasium Parking Lot, 211 Kanaloa Ave., Wailuku); mauifair.com

TICKETS ON SALE MAUI PRIDE 2012 - Fri, Oct 5 and Sat, Oct 6. A celebration of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered community of Maui! The Pride weekend schedule includes an all-ages 80’s kickoff dance party at Sharky’s in Kihei on Friday night, and on Saturday, a morning culture tour/mountain hike, the annual Maui Pride Daytime Festival, buffet dinner & private luau, concert & dance, and a “second chance” youth prom, all at the Maui Tropical Plantation. For details and ticket purchase info, see website. 808-446-0549; mauipride.org “RUN FOR YOUR WIFE” PLAY - Fri, Oct 5 through Sun, Oct 14. Maui OnStage presents London’s longest running comedy, “Run For Your Wife,” by Ray Cooney, directed by Dale Button. Fri/Sat: 7:30pm and Sun: 3pm. $1528. Iao Theater, (68 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-242-6969; mauionstage.com SERVICE TRIP TO HALEAKALA CRATER - Fri, Oct 5 through Sun, Oct 7. Volunteer in Haleakala Crater and stay free at Kapalaoa Cabin. Help care for native vegetation, and in return, you’re free to hike, take pictures or just relax in the wilderness. Save the date; call for reservations. Haleakala National Park, (Haleakala National Park, Kula); 808-876-1673; fhnp.org EDDIE PALMIERI AND THE BRIAN LYNCH QUARTET - Fri, Oct 5. A nine-time Grammy Award winner, Eddie Palmieri is a pianist and bandleader from Puerto Rico, best known for combining jazz piano and instrumental solos with Latin rhythms. Featuring Dafnis Priesto and Boris Kozlov. $12, $25, $45. 7:30pm Castle Theater, MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

GLAMITY’S ELEKTROFEST - Fri, Oct 5. A party celebrating electro house music, beer and drags! Performances by Xiu Xiu La Rage, LuLu Shannens, Moana, Tiare LaRage, Glitz LaRage, Raena Montgomery & Kaylee Montgomery. $15 cover. 9:30pm Three’s Bar & Grill, (1945 S Kihei Rd.); 808-879-3133; facebook.com/glamity.maui DELHI 2 DUBLIN - Sat, Oct 6. One of Canada’s most buzzed-about bands, Delhi 2 Dublin performs an energetic mash-up of bhangra, Celtic, dub, reggae and electronica with global rhythms set to club beats. $25/advance, $35/ show day. 7:30pm A&B Amphitheater / Yokouchi Pavilion, MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org HERITAGE FILM FESTIVAL: KOALOHA ‘UKULELE STORY - Sun, Oct 7. This animated documentary details the creation of the KoAloha ‘Ukulele Company and chronicles the life events of Alvin Okami, an Oahu based entertainer turned inventor. The film was winner of the Golden Kahuna Award at the 2009 Hon Int’l Film Fest. $10. 3pm Maui Arts & Cultural Center, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org HAOCHEN ZHANG, PIANO - Fri, Oct 12. In 2009, Haochen Zhang became the youngest and the first Chinese competitor to be awarded the prestigious Nancy Lee and Perry R. Bass Gold Medal at the Van Cliburn International Piano Competition. $12, $30, $40. 7:30pm Maui Arts & Cultural Center, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org MAUI ‘UKULELE FESTIVAL - Sun, Oct 14. Enjoy a relaxed afternoon of island music with highly-acclaimed musicians, celebrating Hawaii’s beloved instrument. Renowned ‘ukulele advocate and teacher Roy Sakuma will serve as M.C. Free: save the date. 1-6pm A&B Amphitheater / Yokouchi Pavilion, MACC, (One Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org PINEAPPLE GRILL’S 1ST ANNUAL OKTOBERFEST CELEBRATION - Sun, Oct 14. Celebrate Oktoberfest with an all you can eat German inspired buffet that includes a sausage station, accompanied with condiments and an array of side dishes. Maui Brewing Company will feature their speciality Oktoberfest Beer Hana Hou Helles Bock. $25 per person (beer and other beverages not included); reservations required. 3pm Pineapple Grill, (200 Kapalua Dr.); 808669-9600; pineapplekapalua.com

EVENTS THURSDAY, SEP 27 FREE TALK ON IMPROVING COLLABORATION - Guest speaker Marisa Castuera Hayase will share her experience and insights using Listening Projects as a tool to identify and communicate strengths and weaknesses that can change the outcomes of a planning process, prioritize issues, and more. It’s a brown bag session, so bring your

own lunch. Refreshments will be provided. Free. 11:30am-1pm Maui Economic Development Board, Cameron Center, (1305 N. Holopono Street, Suite #5, Kihei); 808779-7235; collaborativeleadersnetwork.org; miki@collaborativeleadersnetwork.org HAWAIIAN MUSIC SERIES - See picks on p. 17 for info. Free. 6-7:30pm Baldwin Home Museum, (120 Dickenson Street, Lahaina); 808-661-3262; lahainarestoration.org/baldwin.html MAUI SMUG - The In-Real-Life Forum for All Social Media Users on Maui. Capacity is limited. Be sure to register early. Free (Not Catered). 4-6:30pm MEDB’s Malcom Center, (1305 North Holopono Street, Suite 1, Kihei); mauismug.com 90TH MAUI FAIR - Today through Sunday. See picks on p. 17 for info. $7 adult; $3 children 5-11; Free to keiki 4 & under. $5 parking. War Memorial Gymnasium Parking Lot, (211 Kanaloa Ave., Wailuku); mauifair.com MAUI FAIR SHUTTLE FROM QUEEN KAAHUMANU CENTER - Park at QKC and take their free shuttle to the Maui Fair grounds. Shuttle departs from the Champs entrance and runs every 30-40 minutes. Schedule: Thursday: 6-11:30pm, Friday, 6pm-12:30am, Saturday, 6pm-12:30am and Sunday, 6pm–11:30pm. QKC, (275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-4325; queenkaahumanucenter.com

FRIDAY, SEP 28 MAUI MUSICAL JAM - Head to Whole Foods for a musical treat every Friday! In partnership with Hawaii on TV, each month a new musical style will be featured. This month Jazz & Blues is taking over in honor of the Annual Maui Jazz & Blues Festival. See website for more info. Free. 12-2pm Whole Foods Market, (70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului); 808-872-3310; mauiajazzandbluesfestival.com ARTIST IN RESIDENCE: JENNIFER VALENZUELA - Come meet artist Jennifer Valenzuela, whose inspiration is the shapes and colors of Maui. Free. 4-7pm Maui Hands, (612 Front St., Ste. D, Lahaina); 808-667-9898; mauihands.com ZUMBA CLASS WITH KEONI’S HOT LAVA DANCEFIT - Free. 6pm Next to Spa Luna, Maui Mall, (70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-871-1307; mauimall.com DIVAS NIGHT OUT - Maui’s most elegant and well known spa hosts an evening of unity to raise funds for the National Breast Cancer Foundation. Wear your favorite pink attire and enjoy a “Shades of Pink” fashion show by Cache along with a silent auction. Access to hydrotherapy circuit, chocolate spa baths, and a rich array of pink appetizers and desserts combine in a night for your inner diva. Reservations required. $50 per diva, $25 per little diva (6-12). 7:30-10pm Spa Grande, Grand Wailea Resort & Spa, (3850 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-875-1234, ext. 4949; grandwailea.com


TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

9/27

9/28

9/29

9/30

10/1-10/3

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

ALE HOUSE

Envy Nightclub 9pm; $10 cover

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

AMBROSIA 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-1011

BLUE LAGOON Wharf Cinema Center, 658 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4900

CAPTAIN JACK’S ISLAND GRILL Wharf Cinema Center, 672 Front St., Lahaina - 667-0988

Ladies Night 10pm-close; no cover

Ladies Nite w/ DJ 10pm; no cover

Bob Jones 7-9:30pm; no cover

Captain Jack’s Birthday 9pm-12am; no cover

DJ Sweet Beets 10pm; no cover

Bluetech w/ Boogiemeister and Elf 9:30pm; $15 cover

A Gangnam Style Party 9:30pm; $10 for men

DJ Pandora 8pm; no cover

Lawaia & Aaron 7-10pm; no cover

TUE - Howard Ahia & Friends, 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Barefoot Minded 7:30-10pm; no cover

Jonny Ringo 7:30-10pm; no cover

Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; no cover

MON - Peter D, 7:30-10pm / TUE - Jazz, 7:3010pm WED - Jordan Cuddy, 7:30-10pm

Rampage 10pm; no cover

Colleen Lloy 9pm; no cover

A Farewell Bash for Erin Miller, 9pm; no cover

Gina Martenilli 6pm; no cover

MON - Gomega, 10pm / TUE - Pool League, 10pm / WED - Jukebox Party, 10pm

Quiz Night 7pm; no cover

Dance Party 10pm; no cover

Dance Party 10pm; no cover

Sebrina Barron 6pm; no cover

MON - Amy’s Party Mix / TUES - Live Music WED - Dance Party (all sets 10pm)

Kanoa 6-9pm; no cover

Tom Conway 6-9pm; no cover

Bob Jones & Nils Rosenblad 6-9pm; no cover

Dr. Nat & Johnny Z 6-9pm; no cover

MON - Nara Boone & Scott Baird / TUES - Mark Johnstone & Lenny Castellanos / WED Howard Ahia & Scotty Rotten (6pm; no cover)

Jah Residentz 9pm-close; no cover

Dat Guyz 9pm-close; no cover

Super Dub Tribe 9pm-close; no cover

Karaoke Industry Night 8pm-close; no cover

MON - Karaoke, 8pm / TUE - DJ Daizy, 9pm / WED - Open Mic Night, 9pm (no cover)

Evan Shulman 6-9pm; no cover

The Vandals 9pm; $18

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

DIAMONDS ICE BAR 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-9299

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

FLEETWOOD’S ON FRONT ST. 744 Front St. (Rooftop), Lahaina - 669-6425

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8010

HARD ROCK CAFE 900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

SATURDAY, SEP 29 CANE BURNING PROTEST - Maui residents affected by cane smoke are encouraged to attend a sign waving/protest against cane burning at the corner of Mokulele and Dairy Road near the commuter parking lot. 10am (Kahului); 808-283-3049; stopcaneburning.org; info@stopcaneburning.org SEABURY HALL HAWAIIAN ENSEMBLE Free. 1pm Maui Mall, (70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-871-1307; mauimall.com PET ADOPTIONS WITH HARF - Join the Hawaii Animal Rescue Foundation for a very special opportunity to rescue your next best friend! Every Saturday, HARF will bring animals in need of a good home. For more info, see websites or call. 10am-4pm Whole Foods Market, (70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului); 808-446-4126; and 10am4pm Petco, (270 Dairy Road, #144, Kahului); 808-876-0022; hawaiianimalrescue.org YO-GI-OH CARD SESSION - Free. 3pm Lahaina Cannery Mall, (1221 Honoapiilani Hwy.); 808-661-5304; lahainacannerymall.com LAHAINA ARTS SOCIETY’S BANYAN TREE ART FAIR - Today and Sunday. Under the shade of Lahaina’s famous banyan tree, over 50 select Maui artists show and sell their work. Find unique treasures including jewelry, art, hand-sewn items, candles and time travel at the Historic Old Lahaina Courthouse. Free. 9am-5pm Banyan Tree Park, (649 Wharf St.); visitlahaina.com

SUNDAY, SEP 30 KATACHIKI/BINGATA WORKSHOP - A hands-on workshop in the Okinawan textile art of bingata print, presented by Yuhsuke Yokoi, a visiting artist from Okinawa. Classes will be at 9am1pm or 2pm-6pm. $120; reservations required. Paia Rinzai Zen Mission, (120 Alawai Rd.); 808205-7116; mauiryukyuculturegroup@aol.com

MON - Guest DJ, DJ Salvo / TUE - Toxic Tuesdays w/ DJ TRVR / WED - DJ Del Sol and DJ CIA (all sets 10pm; no cover)

Kenny & the P.E.S.T.S. w/ Fitz & Andy, 10pm

CHARLEY’S

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina - 667-0908

Ultra w/ DJ CIA 10pm; no cover

Get Your Sexy On w/ DJ LaRage 10pm; no cover

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

COOL CAT CAFE

WED - Karaoke w/ Sista Deva, 8pm-12:30am (all sets no cover)

DigiLuxe w/ DJ Kurt 10pm; no cover

CASANOVA

PEGGY SUE’S 17TH ANNUAL CLASSIC CAR SHOW - Come vote for your favorite classic car while enjoying live music, door prizes, games and a coloring contest for all ages. All cars welcome. Pre-register cars: $5, register at show between 9-11am: $8. 11am-4pm Azeka II Shopping Center, (1279 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-875-8944 MAUI MALL FAMILY SUNDAY - A funfilled afternoon with games, keiki activities and prize giveaways. Whole Foods have partnered with the Maui Mall to promote and celebrate Maui students who have excelled in Language and Culture. Healthy snacks for all participants. Free. 11am-2pm Maui Mall, (70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808871-1307; mauimall.com AKI NO KARAOKE MATSURI - The general public is invited to attend this free event that will feature Japanese songs performed by the members of the Maui Karaoke Club. Refreshments will be served. Free. 11:30am Kaunoa Senior Center, (401 Alakapa Pl., Sprecklesville); 808-270-7308 THE TAYLOR GUITARS ROAD SHOW 2012 - Spend an afternoon of guitar talk and demos with the Taylor factory staff and guitar makers from El Cajon, California. No cover charge. 3pm Casanova, (1188 Makawao Ave.); 808-572-0220; casanovamaui.com STORY TIME WITH READ ALOUD AMERICA - A family fun get-together with healthy snacks and dinner, and some good old fashion storytelling with Read Aloud America. Perfect for families with children ages Pre-K through Grade 2. Free; preregister at Customer Service as space is limited. 4:30pm Whole Foods Market, (70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului); 808-7570981; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

Sunrize Saturdaze w/ DJ Decka 10pm; no cover

DJ Jamn J 10pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic w/ MT, 10pm-close; no cover Justin Phillips 7-9:30pm; no cover

MON - Dave Caroll / TUE - Jordan Cuddy / WED - Wolf (all sets 7pm; no cover) TUE - Willie K and The Warehouse Blues Band, 9pm; $10 / WED - Ladies Night - Fast Forward w/ DJ Kurt, 10pm; $5 before 11pm

MONDAY, OCT 1 HULA PERFORMANCE - Original hip-ster stylie performance. Free. 10:30am Queen Kaahumanu Center, (275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-3369; queenkaahumanucenter.com

TUESDAY, OCT 2 ‘UKULELE LESSONS - Learn some strumming techniques and impress your friends. Free. 5:30pm Lahaina Cannery Mall, (1221 Honoapiilani Hwy.); 808-661-5304; lahainacannerymall.com POLYNESIAN PERFORMANCES - Come see Maui’s most talented halaus perform center stage. Free. 7pm Lahaina Cannery Mall, (1221 Honoapiilani Hwy.); 808-6615304; lahainacannerymall.com CONFESSIONS OF A LOW CLASS VEGAN - Think eating a healthy vegan diet is a challenge? Think again. Karl Seff, Ph.D, Professor of chemistry and vegan since 1991, will impart wisdom on preparing quick and easy vegan meal options. Free admission and snacks. 7-8:30pm Cameron Center Auditorium, (95 Mahalani St., Wailuku); 808572-8371; steveblake@hawaiiantel.net

WEDNESDAY, OCT 3 OCCUPY MAUI MEETING - The group’s focus is on foreclosure laws and environmental problems. They want to hear about your issues. Simply attend one of their weekly Wed. meetings to get involved. Free. 5-7pm At Freedom Lawn or Pavilion at UH Maui College, (310 Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului); occupymaui.com MAUI SMUG - The In-Real-Life Forum for All Social Media Users on Maui. Capacity is limited. Be sure to register early. Free (Not Catered). 4-6:30pm Honua Kai Resort & Spa, (130 Kai Malina Parkway, Lahaina); mauismug.com

WOW! WAILEA ON WEDNESDAYS - The Shops at Wailea hosts their weekly arts and entertainment series, featuring Lanakila & Co. performing in the lower courtyard, a slew of shop-to-shop specials, art gallery receptions and artist appearances. Free. 6:30-8pm The Shops at Wailea, Lower Courtyard, (3750 Wailea Alanui); 808-8976770 ext. 2; theshopsatwailea.com / @ ShopsAtWailea on Twitter

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI CANOES - Sun, Live Jazz 3-6pm; Fri, Howard Ahia 5:30-8:30pm. (1450 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-0937. CAPTAIN JACK’S ISLAND GRILL - Wed, Wolf 7-9:30pm; Thu, Adam Masterson 7-9:30pm; Fri, Bob Jones 7-9:30pm; Sat, Jonny Ringo 7-9:30pm; Sun, Will Hartzag 7-9:30pm; Mon, Dave Carroll 7-9:30pm; Tue, Jordan Cuddy 7-9:30pm. (672 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0988.

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ON MAUITIME.COM SEPTEMBER 27, 2012 23


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9PM • NO COVER

SATURDAY 9.29

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VOTED BEST HAPPY HOUR ON MAUI!

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ECLECTIC ART & MUSIC SHOW FEATURING:

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CASANOVA’S FAMOUS LADIES NIGHT FAST FORWARD WITH DJ KURT

MUSIC STARTS @ 10PM + $5 BEFORE 11PM - $10 AFTER

THE EVENING THAT EARNED CASANOVA’S THE AWARDS

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MUSIC STARTS AT 10PM NO COVER

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SHOW STARTS AT 9:30PM ORIGINS MUSIC INTERNATIONAL $15 COVER & BEATS BAZAAR PRESENTS: BLUETECH W/ BOOGIEMEISTER & ELF LIVE PAINTING + LIVE PERCUSSION VISUAL PROJECTIONS BY DOUGLAS DEBOER

SUNDAY

EVENT STARTS AT 3PM NO COVER THE TAYLOR GUITAR ROAD SHOW 2012 AN AFTERNOON OF GUITAR TALK & DEMOS WITH THE TAYLOR FACTORY STAFF & GUITAR MAKERS + STRAIGHT FROM EL CAJON, CALIFORNIA

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TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

9/27

9/28

9/29

9/30

10/1-10/3

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

ISANA 515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

JAVA JAZZ 3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. - 667-0787

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Rick Glencross 7pm - close; no cover

Guest Performer 7pm - close; no cover

Rick Glencross 7pm - close; no cover

JAY’S PLACE

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 875-7711

KIMO’S 845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

WED - Live music, 10pm-close; no cover

Kawika 7pm; no cover

Kenny Roberts 7pm; no cover

Eight Track Players 7pm; no cover

John Grover 7pm; no cover

MON - That’s What I’m Talking About TUE - Da Ha-y-ans / WED - Herb Anderson (all sets 7pm; no cover)

1810 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Willie K 9-11pm; $5 cover

1810 8-10pm; no cover

Danyel Alana & Don Lopez, 6:30pm, no cover

MON - Benny Uyetake & Glenn Kakagawa, 6-8pm / TUE-WED Sam Ahia, 6:30-8:30pm (all sets no cover)

Karaoke w/ “Auntie” Toddy Lilikoi, 9:30pm; no cover

Karaoke w/ “Auntie” Toddy Lilikoi, 9:30pm; no cover

KOBE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St. (Lounge Area), Lahaina - 667-5555

LAHAINA SPORTS BAR

MON - Trivia Night, 7pm; no cover

843 Waine’e St., Lahaina - 667-6655

L‘AVA SPORTS BAR & KARAOKE 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4888

LILIKOI RESTAURANT & WINE BAR 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku - 575-2629

LONGHI’S LAHAINA 888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

LULU’S LAHAINA

MON - Farzad & Mike Madden / TUE Farzad & Mike Madden / WED - Tracy Stiles (all sets 7pm-close; no cover)

Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm - close; no cover

The Whiskey Pimps 10pm-close; no cover

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina - 661-6699

KAHALE’S

WED - Karaoke

MON - Free Pool / TUE - Free Karaoke/Pool WED - Free Pool

Free Karaoke Live Music 7-9:30pm; no cover

Live Music 7-9:30pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic Night, 6-10pm; no cover (sign up starts at 5pm)

Marty Dread & Friends 9:30pm; $10

TUE - Johnny Ringo, 8-10pm

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

Karaoke Night 10:30pm; no cover

Justin Phillips 6:30-9:30pm; no cover

All Access DJs Big Mike & Money Mike, 10pm; $10

MERRIMAN’S

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

Ranga Pae, 6-9pm

MON - The Benoits / TUE - David Choy / WED - Ranga Pae (all sets 6-9pm)

Sebrina Barron 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Colleen Lloy 6:30-8:30pm; no cover

Private Party

MON - Joel Katz, 7-9pm; no cover TUE - Brenton Keith, 7-8pm; no cover WED - Willie K, 7-9pm; $65 dinner & show

1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua - 669-6400

MOANA BAKERY & CAFE 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

COOL CAT CAFE - Wed, Jordan Cuddy 7:3010pm; Thu, Barefoot Minded 7:30-10pm; Fri, Jonny Ringo 7:30-10pm; Sat, Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; Mon, Peter deAquino 7:30-10pm; Tue, Jazz 7:30-10pm. (Wharf Cinema Center, 658 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0908. DUKE’S BEACH HOUSE - Every Mon & Tue, Eddie & Alika 6-8:30pm; Daily, Hula Performance 6:30pm; Every Mon & Wed, Brian 3-5pm; Wed, Daniel & Kahala 6-8:30pm; Thu, Garrett & Peter 6-8:30pm; Fri, Garrett 3-5pm; Every Fri & Sat, Damon & Ron Oversize Productions 6-8:30pm; Sat, Tim 3-5pm; Sun, Fausto 3-5pm; Sun, Damon & Tim 6-8:30pm; Every Tue & Thu, Ben 3-5pm. (130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina); 808-662-2900. FLEETWOOD’S ON FRONT ST. - Fri, Tom Conway 6-9pm; Sat, Bob Jones & Nils Rosenblad 6-9pm; Sun, Dr. Nat & Johnny Z 6-9pm; Mon, Nara Boone & Scott Baird 6-9pm; Tue, Mark Johnstone & Lenny Castellanos 6-9pm; Wed, Howard Ahia & Scotty Rotten 6-9pm; Thu, Kanoa 6-9pm. (744 Front Street, Lahaina); 808-669-6425. HARD ROCK CAFE - Fri, Evan Shulman 6-9pm. (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-7400. HULA GRILL - Tue, Jarrett Roback & Junior Lacuesta 1:30pm; Daily, Hula Grill Happy Hour 3-5pm; Tue, Damon & Danyel Alana 4pm; Tue, Wili Pohaku & Peter DeAquino 6:30pm; Every Mon, Wed & Thu, Ernest Pua’a 11am; Wed, Kaniala Masoe 1:30pm; Wed, Peter DeAquino 4pm; Wed, Ernest Pua’a & Friends 6:30pm; Thu, Alika

WED - Kenny Roberts, 6-9pm; no cover

Benoit Jazz Works 7-9pm; no cover Pub Quiz Night w/ Trish da Dish 9:30pm; no cover

Nakaoka 1:30pm; Thu, Kaniala Masoe 4pm; Thu, Kulewa 6:30pm; Fri, Kaniala Masoe 1:30pm; Every Sun, Fri & Sat, 1810 4pm; Fri, Kawika, Roy & Albert 6:30pm; Sat, Ron, Ikaika & Damon 1:30pm; Sat, Derick & Damon 6:30pm; Sun, Danyel Alana 1:30pm; Sun, Derick Sebastian Trio 6:30pm; Mon, Kawika Lum Ho 1:30pm; Mon, Armadillo & Derek 4pm; Mon, Derick Sebastian & Josh Kahula 6:30pm; Every Sun, Tue, Fri & Sat, Kawika Lum Ho 11am. (Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pwy., Bldg P); 808-667-6636. JAVA JAZZ/SOUP NUTZ - Every Thu & Sat, Rick Glencross 7pm; Fri, Guest Performer 7pm; Fri, Tracy Stiles 7pm; Every Sun, Mon & Tue, Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm. (3350 L. Honoapiilani Hwy. #203 & 204, Honokowai); 808-667-0787. KIMO’S - Every Tue & Wed, Sam Ahia 6:308:30pm; Thu, 1810 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, 1810 8-10pm; Mon, Benny Uyetake and Glenn Kakagawa 6-8pm; Fri, Willie K 9-11pm. (845 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-4811. LAHAINA PIZZA COMPANY - Every Wed, Thu & Fri, John Kane 7:30-9:30pm; Sat, Harry Troupe 7:30-9:30pm; Sun, Greg Di Piazza 7:30-9:30pm; Every Mon & Tue, Martin Tevaga 7:30-9:30pm. (730 Front St.); 808-661-0700. LAHAINA SPORTS BAR - Mon, Trivia 7-9pm. (843 Wainee St., Unit 1 & 2); 808-667-6655. LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Fri, JD &

Friends 3-5pm; Sat, JD & Harry 3-5pm; Sun, Merv Oana 3-5pm; Thu, Jarret & Wilson 3-5pm. (Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J); 808-661-4495. LONGBOARDS KA’ANAPALI - Every Tue, Wed, Thu & Fri, Solo guitarist 5:30-8:30pm. (100 Nohea Kai Dr.); 808-667-1200. LULU’S LAHAINA SURF CLUB & GRILL - Thu, Howard Ahia 6-8pm; Fri, Justin Phillips 6:30-9:30pm; Sat, Ben DeLeon 6:309:30pm; Wed, Kenny Roberts 6-9pm. (Lahaina Cannery Mall, 1221 Honoapiilani Hwy. #A1); 808-661-0808. MERRIMAN’S - Daily (except Mon & Tue), Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30pm; Mon, The Benoits 5:30-8:30pm; Tue, David Choy 5:30-8:30pm. (1 Bay Club Pl., Lahaina); 808-669-6400. PARADISE GRILL - Thu, Mark Johnson & John Zangrande 6-9pm; Fri, Teri Garrison 6-8pm; Sat, JD & Harry 6-8pm; Sun, Hawaiian Music Night 6-8pm; Mon, Mark Johnstone & Lenny Castellanos 6-9pm; Tue, JD & Harry 6-8pm. (2291 Ka’anapali Pkwy.); 808-662-3700. PINEAPPLE GRILL - Sat, Jazz on the Green 7-10pm; Fri, Jawaiian Music 7-10pm. (200 Kapalua Dr.); 808-669-9600. PIONEER INN GRILL & BAR - Wed, JD on the Rocks 5-8pm; Thu, Greg di Piazza feat. Alana Cini 5:30-8:30pm; Tue, Ah-Tim Elenicki 5:30-8:30pm. (658 Wharf St., Lahaina); 808-661-8881.

RB BLACK ANGUS STEAKHOUSE - Sun, Live Jazz 3-6pm. (4465 Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina); 808-669-8889. RUTH’S CHRIS STEAK HOUSE - Every Sun & Sat, Live Jazz 6-9pm. (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-8815. SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT, NAPILI KAI BEACH RESORT - Every Mon & Wed, Albert Kaina 7-9pm; Sat, Coelho Morrison 7-9pm; Sun, Andrew Kaina 7-9pm; Every Tue, Thu & Fri, Kincaid Kupahu 7-9pm. (5900 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy.); 808-669-1500.

SOUTH MAUI AMBROSIA - Thu, Jamie Gallo 7pm; Mon, The Jonah Trio 8pm; Wed, Red Carpet Movie Night: Zombieland 7:30pm. (1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-891-1011.

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING? CALENDAR LISTINGS

ON MAUITIME.COM SEPTEMBER 27, 2012 25


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OCEANS BAR & GRILL 1819 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-2414

PARADISE GRILL 2291 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Lahaina - 662-3700

Live Salsa Music w/ Nieto & Barbara, 7:30-9:30pm

Bottoms Up Fridays w/ NLE, 10pm; no cover

Mark Johnson & John Zangrande, 6-9pm

Teri Garrison, 6-8pm Live music or DJ, 10pm

Live Blues Band 10pm

Hawaiian Music 6-8pm

RB STEAKHOUSE

WED - Open Mic Night, 9:30pm; no cover

4465 Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina - 669-8889

SANSEI - KAPALUA 115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

SANSEI - KIHEI 1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116, Kihei - 879-0004

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Un-corked & Unplugged 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

DJ Blast 10pm; no cover

DJ Gemini & DJ Ynot 10pm; no cover

DJ LX 10pm-close; no cover

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 1234 L. Main St., Wailuku - 243-2206

STELLA BLUES CAFE 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-3779

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

R.S. SHARKY’S 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 874-6115

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-3133

TIFFANY’S 1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

WATERCRESS Waiehu Beach Center, Wailuku-243-9351

BEACH BUMS BAR & GRILL - Every Sun & Wed, Mark Burnett 5-8pm; Every Thu & Sat, Kenny Roberts 5-8pm; Fri, Tom Cherry & Mike Finkiewicz 5-8pm; Tue, Randall Rospond 5-8pm. (300 Maalaea Rd. #1M); 808-243-2286. CAPISCHE? - Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm; Sun, Mark Johnstone 6-9pm; Fri, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm. (555 Kaukahi St., Kihei); 808-879-2224. DIAMONDS ICE BAR & GRILL - Sun, Gina Martenilli 6pm. (1279 S. Kihei Rd. #314); 808-874-9299. DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB - Sun, Sebrina Barron 6pm. (1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-875-9669. HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH - Thu, Junior Lacuesta 4-8pm; Sat, Ryan Robinson 4-8pm; Every Tue, Wed & Fri, Rick Glencross 4-8pm. (1913 S. Kihei Rd. #E); 808-891-8010. JUST WING IT! - Every Fri & Sat, Chicken Boxing 5-7pm. (225 Piikea Ave., Kihei); 808-875-9464. KAMAOLE POOLSIDE CAFE - Wed, Steve Sargenti 6-9pm; Thu, Island favorites with Kawika Lum Ho 6-9pm; Fri, Girls Night Out with Gina Martinelli 6-9pm; Sat, Ron Shadian and Friends 6-9pm; Sun, Kenny Roberts 6-9pm; Mon, Music by Rama 6-9pm; Tue, Mike & Mark 6-9pm. (2259 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-891-8860. MONKEYPOD KITCHEN - Wed, Jarret & Wilson 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Wolf 3-5pm; Fri, Alika Naka’oka 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Randall Rospond 3-5pm; Sat, Erin Smith 6:30-8:30pm; Sun, Alika Naka’oka 3-5pm; Sun, Kilohana 6:308:30pm; Mon, Ron & Tarvin 6:30-8:30pm; Tue, Kilohana 6:30-8:30pm. (10 Wailea Gateway Pl., Unit B-201); 808-891-2322.

Kanoa 10pm-close; no cover

MON - Wolf, 9pm / TUE - DJ LX, 10pm / WED - Ladies Night w/ A.D.D. Twins, 10pm

NFL / Karaoke

WED - Reggae Night, 9pm; no cover

Jordan & Gordon 9pm-midnight; no cover

2411 S. Kihei Rd. #B4 - 879-0602

STEEL HORSE SALOON

MON - Lenny Castellanos & Mark Johnstone, 6-9pm / TUE - Gene & Shea, 6-9pm / WED Johnny Ringo w/ Mark D’Antonio,10pm-1am

Last Bike Night w/ Live Music from Jus Us, 7pm

The Whiskey Pimps 8pm; no cover

Ah-Tim 4-6pm; no cover

Vince Esquire 8pm; no cover

MON - Mike Finkewiecz, 4-6pm / TUE - Tom Conway, 4pm / Live Stand Up Comedy Open Mic, 9pm / WED - Randall Rospond, 4pm

By Request 90’s Edition DJ Blast, 10pm; $10

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; no cover

Silver Spurs 9pm; $4

Karaoke/Family Night 6pm; no cover

Live Music & Dancing 8pm; no cover

Open Mic Night w/ Shaun Michael, 9pm; no cover

I Want Candy 80’s Party 9pm; no cover

Art Show + Jordan T., Ka’ala, Mr. Kapu, 9pm; $5

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

MON through WED- Karaoke

Twisted Thursdays w/ Party Rock Krew 10pm; no cover

Forbidden Fridays w/ Party Rock Krew 10pm; no cover

Free Karaoke 9pm; no cover

Free Karaoke 9pm; no cover

MON - Free Karaoke, 9pm / TUE - Free Karaoke, 9pm / WED - Singles’ Night w/ X-Klusive Sounds Productions, 10pm (All sets no cover)

MONSOON INDIA - Sat, Cambria Moss & Ricardo Dioso 6:30-8:30pm; Tue, The Hula Honeys 5:30-8:30pm. (760 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-875-4555. MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Tue, Brenton Keith and his Bag O’ Tricks 7-8pm; Wed, Willie K 7-9pm; Thu, Murray Thorne 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Sebrina Barron 6:308:30pm; Mon, Joel Katz 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Colleen Lloy 6:30-8:30pm. (100 Kaukahi St., Wailea); 808-874-1131. PITA PARADISE WAILEA - Sun, Benoit Jazzworks 5:30-7:30pm. (34 Wailea Gateway Plaza); 808-879-7177. SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Wed, Mark Johnstone 4-6pm; Thu, Jaime Gallo 4-6pm; Fri, Randall Rospond 4-6pm; Sat, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Sun, Viva La Rumba 4-6pm; Mon, Kanoa 4-6pm; Tue, Sebrina Barron 4-6pm. (Kihei Kalama Village, 1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-874-6444. STELLA BLUES CAFE - Wed, Randall Rospond 4-6pm; Thu, Ah Tim 4-6pm; Fri, Ahumanu 4-6pm; Sun, Jamie Lawrence 4-6pm; Mon, Mike Finkiewicz 4-6pm; Tue, Tom Conway 4-6pm. (1279 S. Kihei Rd., #201); 808-874-3779. TAQUERIA CRUZ - Every Tue & Sat, Live Music - Reggae, Jazz, Blues 5:30-8:30pm. (2395 S. Kihei Rd. #112); 808-875-2910. THE RED BAR AT GANNON’S, A PACIFIC VIEW RESTAURANT - Thu, Fulton Tashombe & Special Guests 6-8pm; Tue, Braddah Larry Golis 6-8pm. (Wailea Golf Club House, 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr.); 808-875-8080.

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; no cover

Live Music 5:30-7:30pm; no cover

WED - Brenton Keith & His Bag O’Tricks; 7pm; no cover WED - The House Shakers 8:30pm, no cover

THREE’S BAR & GRILL - Every Sun, Mon & Wed, Hawaiian Music 5-8pm; Sun, Louise Lambert 6:30-9pm; Every Tue, Thu, Fri & Sat, Acoustic with Chad Kaya 5-8pm. (1945 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-879-3133. TOMMY BAHAMA’S TROPICAL CAFE Every Thu & Fri, Margie Heart 5:30-9:30pm; Every Sun & Sat, Howard Ahia 5:30-9:30pm; Mon, Greg Di Piazza 5:30-9:30pm; Wed, Merv Oana 5:30-9:30pm. (3750 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-875-9983.

MOANA BAKERY & CAFE - Thu, Benoit Jazz Works 7-9pm. (71 Baldwin Ave., Paia); 808-579-9999. NORTHSHORE CAFE - Fri, Makana 7-9pm; Tue, Ryan - Keyboards from Brooklyn 7-9pm. (824 Kokomo Rd., Haiku); 808-575-2770. PAIA BAY CAFE - Sun, Hawaiian Steel Guitar w/ Joel Katz 9-11am. (43 Hana Hwy., Paia); 808-579-3111.

CENTRAL MAUI CAFE O’LEI AT THE DUNES AT MAUI LANI - Every Fri & Sat, Phil and Angela Benoit 5:308pm; Thu, Reiko Fukina 5:30-8pm. (1333 Maui Lani Pkwy., Kahului); 808-877-0073. WAILUKU COFFEE COMPANY - Fri, Live music 5-7pm. (28 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-495-0259

UPCOUNTRY MAUI CAFE DES AMIS - Thu, Joe Conte 6:308:30pm; Sat, Live Argentinian music 6:308:30pm; Wed, Mark Johnstone 6:30-8:30pm. (42 Baldwin Ave., Paia); 808-579-6323. CHARLEY’S RESTAURANT & SALOON Tue, Howard Ahia & Friends 6:30-8:30pm; Sun, Live Band Open Mic Night with Lawaia & Aaron 7-10pm. (142 Hana Hwy., Paia); 808-579-8085. HANA HOU CAFE - Tue, Hipnautical 6-9pm. (810 Haiku Rd.); 808-575-2661. LILIKOI GRILL RESTAURANT & WINE BAR - Every Thu & Sat, Live Music 7-9:30pm. (810 Kokomo Rd., Suite 186, Haiku); 808-575-2629.

SEPTEMBER 27, 2012 27


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Horoscope

Sign Language

QUIZunderstood ANSWERS ...to questions from page 4

1: B–A portion of a Japanese fishing dock torn loose during the 2011 tsunami.

BY CAERIEL CRESTIN LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Some kinds of bamboo grow so quickly you can almost see it happen. Daily growth is measured in feet, not inches or millimeters. On the other hand, some forms of life scarcely change at all over many years. Your own transformations seem to swing wildly between extremes like these. For years, you labor along with nary a long-term change in emotion or attitude. Other times you’ll surprise us with unprecedented new green leaves, strong new extensions of yourself, until you tower over your former height. Like now. My encouraging advice: Grow fast but not so fast that you get dizzy climbing the ladder of your self-understanding. SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) You’ve heard of “deja vu.” It means, roughly, “already seen.” Other similarly named mental phenomena include “jamais vu” (“never seen”) and “presque vu” (“almost seen”). The former refers to the problem of temporarily being unable to recognize familiar objects or people. The latter describes the sensation of being on the brink of a great revelation, seeing “the big picture,” but not quite getting it. I hope you experience an even lesser-known vision this week, which I’ll call “vouloir voir” (“to want to see”). See things exactly as they are, instead of viewed (and distorted) through the filters of your past. In this case, desire equals ability—you can see, if you want it enough. Open your eyes, Scorpio. The truth is waiting. SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) This week, you’re the winning contestant in the game show of your life. Press your luck, baby! Go for the big money! When you’re presented with one dangerous but lucrative (monetarily, socially, emotionally) gamble after another, I urge you to take the dare every time. Considering the sane, sensible compromise? Survey says: Wrong answer! Don’t settle for that halfway-cool consolation gift. Why should you? You’re eligible for the grand prize! Why simply accept that crappy giveaway toaster? Don’t stop ’til you get the big bucks, whether they’re parceled out in dollars, friendship or love (or all three!). CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Some people have that marvelous knack of applying soothing balm over a wound, stanching bleeding (physical or emotional) with a gentle word. Often, in the past, you’ve had the opposite effect, dismayingly— as if despite your intent to comfort and heal, you’re just rubbing salt in an open cut. Oh briny Goat-fish, I believe in the cautious goodness of your heart, and so do most of your friends. That’s why these sometimes clumsy gestures have usually only led to a forgivable sting, and rarely a scar. This week’s healing of a longstanding hurt is also an opportunity to learn some of that beneficent grace, bringing you one significant step closer to being a more potent and effective healer than you ever imagined. AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) You know those novels you start reading but never finish? For a while after putting them down, you could still pick them up right where you left off. But if enough time passed, you’d have to flip back to page one to know what’s going on. This week, you can take that situation you’d almost forgotten about and finally deal with it. Why bother resolving a confusing, half-remembered chapter of your life? Only one exceptionally good reason: the sequel is much more exciting (and lucrative) and will only make sense if you’ve finished book one. PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) Pisceans rarely get mad. Oh sure, I’ve seen you fuming in the corner, stewing in your own juices. But your gentle, watery nature seems to resist ever bursting into flames. Think of your life as an old building. You’re the landlord. I long for the day that your anger sets off smoke alarms, has squadrons of fire trucks screaming around corners to answer your rage. I don’t want to see anyone hurt. Nor do you, obviously—that’s the primary reason you’ve avoided difficult emotions like these. Just consider this: in the long run, a short-lived explosion is far less damaging and easier to repair than years of water damage.

2: D–14.5 percent. ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) While visiting Varanasi, India, a gray monkey (with a bright pink butt) came daily to the balcony of our hotel on the Ganges to steal food. I usually managed to scare him off. What a nuisance! Or not? I actually enjoyed those mock-skirmishes with our monkey thief for the same reason I love play-fighting with my dog—they bring me closer to my animal self, stir some deep, satisfying primate instinct in me. Many humans fantasize that we’re not animals. But you understand, Aries. Some of your happiest moments have been in communion with nature. Go ahead: Pound your chest, eat a banana with deep gorilla satisfaction. Get in touch with your animal side this week and strut around like the big, hairless monkey you are. TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Just because you hang out with some fast-talking, brilliant and outrageous friends, you’re privy to many experiences that you might’ve missed out on otherwise. As a result, you’ve led a pretty lucky life. But sometimes you can’t help feeling that only a little of your good fortune was bought by your own merit. Whether or not that’s true, don’t feel bad about it. It’s you those amazing friends like, after all. Besides, this week you’ll get to do more than ride the coattails of your companions. They’ll be hanging on to your shirtsleeves or eating your dust. Now that it’s your lead, all that’s left to decide is: where will you take them (and yourself)? GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Your desire for clarity won’t come from peering into a crystal ball, watching television or otherwise zoning out. I encourage you to concentrate the diffusion of your thoughts into some manageable form. Perhaps you’ve been spending too much time living in your head. A brisk jog, scouring shower or even mindful consumption of a clear glass of water can help remind you that you have a body, which is just as much a tool as your mind. Use it. When you’re done giving your brain a break, it just might be willing to let you use it again. CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) Lately you’ve been such a sweetie. The kind with a hard, shiny, candy shell and a soft, gooey center. You’ve been awfully worried that someone might crack that colorful exterior and expose the tenderness beneath. Fair enough, but don’t get too agitated. According to my astrological calculations, your vivid emotional exoskeleton should hold up just fine. You’re crunchproof. However, even the most stubborn bonbons can hardly resist tender persistence. But should you meet the person who’s prepared to patiently dissolve your emotional defenses, I doubt you’ll be complaining as you melt in his or her capable mouth.

3: E–$90,000.

o al i! h a u M Ma

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LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) I often think of you as some kind of metaphysical yo-yo. Constantly spinning and twirling in a flurry of activity, while simultaneously swinging from the deeply familiar to the distant unknown (either emotionally, out in the “real world” or both) and back again. I’m so in awe at the way you maintain your self-awareness in the midst of all this motion. Now that I’ve called attention to this astounding ability of yours, I hope you won’t totally freak out when you notice the deeper and darker (read: more exciting and magical) waters you’re treading this week. VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) New habits encounter resistance. The inertia of the past is as thick and ugly as raw sewage. The first week or three of going to the gym, you’re sore, aching—it’s so hard to drag yourself through that damn workout. For me, I used to (and still do, to some extent) struggle with writing. But I learned to overcome that painful reluctance because I can vividly recall how good it feels to complete a piece of work. Likewise, you can learn to dangle the potential pleasure of your new practices like a carrot in front of the jackass stubbornness of your inner opposition. Ideally, every moment of our lives should be made up of satisfying habits and joyful spontaneity. True, there’s a lot of necessary shit that just can’t be enjoyed, but it’s your task this week to find or create at least one more thing that can.

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SEPTEMBER 27, 2012 29


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