20.49 2307: Winter's Dream Movie May 18, 2017, Volume 20, Issue 49, MauiTime by MauiTimes

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ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATING INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM

Maui

2017

20th

This special issue will show the colorful, eclectic and sometimes chaotic history of MauiTime’s two decades in print. Our 20th anniversary issue will include highlights of some of the best and most important journalism we’ve done, as well as memories from some of the paper’s current and former writers and editors. The issue will celebrate how far we’ve come, and where we intend to go.

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2017 Hiking. Surfing. Sailing. Camping. Ziplining. Snorkeling. Exploring. Swimming. Paddling.

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Contents VOLUME 20 ✚ ISSUE 49

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION: What’s your favorite science fiction movie?

ON THE COVER: CELEBRATING 20 YEARS OF INDEPENDENCE SINCE 1997

MAY 18, 2017 ✚ VOLUME 20

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ISSUE 49 ✚ FREE

Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter Cocoon Editor: Anthony Pignataro (808) 283-1308 / anthony@mauitime.com @apignataro on Twitter Plan 9 From Outer Space Culinary, Lifestyle & Business Editor: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter Advertising Executive: Sarah Gerlach (808) 283-3260 / sarah@mauitime.com Independence Day Art Director & Production Manager: Darris Hurst artdirector@mauitime.com / darrishurst.com Back to the Future Graphic Designer: Jenn Carter The NeverEnding Story

WIN A SELFIE ‘2307: WINTER’S DREAM’ We talk story with the filmmakers–including Maui’s own wn Ken Martinez Burgmaier–about their new sci-fi epic. 10 p.

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MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2017 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $110 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. MauiTime may be distributed only by MauiTime’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime. MauiTime 16 S. Market St., Ste. 2K, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 www.mauitime.com @mauitime on Twitter Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday 5pm Classified: Monday Noon Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of MauiTime

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We talk story with the filmmakers–including Maui’s own Ken Martinez Burgmaier– about their new sci-fi epic Image Courtesy: Filmmaker Trevor Noah Photo By: Paul Mobley Cover Design By: Darris Hurst

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On May 11, U.S. Senator Brian Schatz and six other Democratic senators asked President Donald Trump to fill senior staff vacancies in the State Department. According to a news release Schatz sent out that day, how many such vacancies are there? A. 12 B. 35

paign fundraisers held during the 2017 Hawaii legislative session listed which Maui legislator as holding a $1,000/head event at Wolfgang’s Steakhouse in Honolulu on April 25? A. Sen. Roz Bake B. Sen. J. Kalani English C. Rep. Joe Souki D. Rep. Angus McKelvey E. Rep. Justin Woodson

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You can't spell "Liquor Commission" without "Liquor"

LIQUOR COMMISSION AGREES TO YET ANOTHER DO-OVER In yet another humiliating turnaround, the Maui County Liquor Commission has agreed to do-over a few of their recent rule changes: lifting the cap on the number of permitted hostess bars and legalizing 24-hour alcohol sales at stores and hotels–changes the LC initially made with little notice given to the public. This comes after last year’s extended debacle where the commission repeatedly tried and failed to hire a new Liquor Control Director (they finally settled on Glenn Mukai, but the process included a major doover and far too much secrecy). As must be painfully obvious to everyone in the county, the Liquor Commission’s first instinct is to tell the public to fuck off. They rarely, if ever, make an important decision without first retreating into closed “executive session,” and seem utterly contemptuous of providing timely and detailed notice of their impending matters. Of course, none of those insanely controversial liquor rules would have gone into effect had Mayor Alan Arakawa not signed them back in February. Given the hugely emotional opposition to those rule changes (and Arakawa’s own desire to run for Lieutenant Governor), it’s hard to imagine Arakawa refusing to reverse himself and sign whatever new rules the Liquor Commission comes up with.

ACLU HAWAII FILES DISABILITY DISCRIMINATION COMPLAINT It’s very easy to read the bad news out of Washington these days and think that we’re different out here in Hawaii– protected by Democrats pretty much running everything. In fact, one of the great fears from having the presidency

and congress guided by unapologetic white supremacy is that all that hate and fear permeates the nation at the bureaucratic level. Evidence of this landed in my inbox yesterday. On May 11, the Hawaii chapter of the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) filed a complaint with the U.S. Department of Homeland Security over the alleged treatment of a deaf Japanese woman at Honolulu International Airport earlier this year. According to the complaint, the woman (referred to only as “M” in the complaint) says customs and border patrol officials were anything but welcoming to her. “M., who wishes to remain anonymous because of her fears of retaliation by immigration officials, was detained on January 31, 2017, shortly after she landed at the airport on a trip to visit her boyfriend, a resident of Hawai‘i,” states the news release. “Throughout hours of questioning by U.S. Customs and Border Protection officials, M. was denied access to an American Sign Language (“ASL”) interpreter– despite her repeated requests that one be provided. M. was forced to communicate by lip reading and writing, which was not effective, and she did not understand what was going on.

Nor was any ASL interpreter provided during her overnight detention by the Federal Bureau of Prisons. M. was also denied access to an accessible telephone that she could use to communicate with her family and boyfriend. Additionally, in violation of Department of Justice guidance, M. was handcuffed behind her back when transferred to and within the Federal Detention Center, preventing her from communicating using her hands.” As you might imagine, the experience was apparently traumatic. “I was so scared and felt alone,” M says in the ACLU news release. “For people with deafness, being cut off from our ways of communicating is terrifying. I have traveled a lot, but have never experienced anything like this at any airport ever. With this complaint, I just want to make sure that other deaf people coming through Hawaii’s airports are treated with basic respect and dignity, and that disabilities are accommodated.” In a May 12 email, Homeland Security Branch Chief Jaime Ruiz says the department is investigating the complaint. “U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) has received the complaint and will address these accusations once our investigation is completed,” Ruiz said in the email. “CBP takes accusations of mistreatment against travelers with disabilities very seriously. CBP officers receive extensive training in disability awareness and treat all travelers with disabilities with dignity, respect and professionalism.”

ACLU TROLL GAME IS EXCELLENT Clearly, the ACLU’s Hawaii chapter is on fire these days. That was obvious even before I got the May 9 press release from the ACLU Hawaii chapter saying the organization has issued a travel advisory for anyone headed to Texas. The advisory stems from the recent passage of SB4 in Texas. That law basically takes the 4th Amendment to the Constitution out back and shoots it to death. “The law gives a green light to police officers in the state to investigate a per-

Overheard “I think the lifestyle out here is more of an image than a reality.” -Man at the Shops of Wailea, May 14

son’s immigration status during a routine traffic stop, leading to widespread racial profiling, baseless scrutiny, and illegal arrests of citizens and non-citizens alike presumed to be ‘foreign’ based on how they look or sound,” states the ACLU news release. “The travel alert applies to all travelers to Texas, including U.S. travelers from other states and U.S. citizens. In addition, this alert applies to all encounters with federal, state, and county law enforcement including local police and sheriffs.” Let’s be clear here–while there’s a definite gallows humor at work here, it’s also undeniable that fascist assaults on long-held constitutional protections are happening across the country. While much of the country is focused on the shit show in Washington, many other battles are happening in state legislatures–battles for the very soul of what it means to be a republic. Here’s ACLU Hawaii legal director Mateo Caballero on the travel advisory: “Hawaii residents traveling to Texas need to be prepared for illegal harassment and racial profiling by local authorities when they get there,” Caballero said. “Hawaii is the most diverse state in the U.S. and we pride ourselves on the multitude of cultures represented on our islands. It is a sad day when we feel it necessary to advise our residents that it is precisely that diversity that makes them vulnerable to racial profiling and constitutional violations if they travel to Texas. At a time when some state lawmakers on the continent are turning their backs on their own residents with racist and hateful laws such as SB4, we encourage Hawaii’s local and state leaders to reaffirm their commitment to inclusion and aloha by refusing to play accomplice to the Trump administration’s unconstitutional immigration agenda. SB4 and similar policies targeting immigrants simply do not reflect Hawaii’s core values.”

CORRECTION In our May 4, 2017 cover story “The Truth About Rat Lungworm Disease On Maui,” we misidentified the source of information concerning water tank protective measures. The correct paragraph should read as follows: “Kay How of University of Hawaii Hilo suggests that anyone with a water catchment system should transition to a 1-micron filter so that all water entering your home is potable and safe from the RLWD parasite. Even if your water tank cover is tight, she suggest that you remove your water tank cover and check for semi-slugs on a monthly basis.” MauiTime regrets the error. ■ editor@mauitime.com + @apignataro For more news articles, visit: mauitime.com/news

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PHOTO COURTESY HAWAII WILDLIFE CENTER

the night before. Since seabirds naturally fly long distances, HWC was granted permission from USFWS and DOFAW to release the Lanai ‘Ua‘u on the Big Island. The release location, Kawaihae Harbor, was chosen based on the close proximity to the center. HWC volunteer Michael Huber carefully kayaked the ‘Ua‘u out of the harbor and the bird was released to favorable winds and calm seas. During its initial examination at the HWC wildlife hospital, HWC wildlife staff found a brood patch indicating that the bird was a breeding adult; HWC staff expects the bird to eventually navigate back home to Lanai to breed. The Hawaiian Petrel is an endangered species that feeds in the open ocean. This large seabird is strictly pelagic and is only seen on land when nesting. The Hawaii Wildlife Center is a professional wildlife rescue, rehabilitation and conservation organization that specializes in the care and protection of native Hawaiian birds and the Hawaiian hoary bat. The HWC wildlife hospital in Kapa‘au meets all federal, state, and local standards for rescue and rehabilitation efforts to aid sick, injured and oiled wildlife. HWC is fully permitted for the rehabilitation of all native bird species and the Hawaiian hoary bat and receives patients from all islands. The Wheels for Wildlife program is a volunteer network of drivers and pilots that transport native wildlife to and from HWC.

Cute!

HOW A GROUP EFFORT RESCUED AN ENDANGERED ‘UA‘U FROM LANAI

HAWAIIAN ARTIST PAINTS NEW MURAL AT SHERATON MAUI RESORT Renowned native Hawaiian artist Kai‘ili Kaulukukui is painting a mural for the Sheraton Maui Resort & Spa that portrays the beauty of the underwater world at Pu‘u Keka‘a, or Black Rock, the iconic historical landmark that fronts the resort.

editor@mauitime.com For more news articles, visit: mauitime.com/news

PHOTO COURTESY SHERATON MAUI RESORT

An endangered ‘Ua‘u from Lanai was released back into the wild after a group effort to rescue the injured Hawaiian Petrel. The ‘Ua‘u was found injured on Lanai last month after a suspected structure collision. The bird was suffering from extensive injuries including head trauma, an injury to its left eye, damage to the tip of its beak, and neurological issues. A rescue was rapidly put together with help from Pulama Lanai, the Division of Forestry and Wildlife (DOFAW), the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service (USFWS), multiple community members, Kohala Dental Center, Maui Save Our Seabirds and the Hawaii Wildlife Center. The initial rescuers coordinated with the HWC to make accommodations for the bird’s treatment. The ‘Ua‘u was flown to the Big Island on April 19 and brought to the HWC wildlife hospital from the airport by Wheels for Wildlife transport volunteer Paul McCollam. The bird was given a guarded prognosis after it was evaluated by the center’s primary care veterinarian, Dr. Juan Guerra. It was started on an aggressive

course of treatment, including antibiotics, eye drops, nutritional support and hydration. HWC staff administered treatment three times a day and remained committed to the bird’s recovery. “This case really highlights the importance of giving downed birds a chance to rehabilitate,” said Samantha Christie, HWC Wildlife Rehabilitation Manager. “This bird would have perished if not for the quick response on Lanai and the intensive care provided at HWC.” The ‘Ua‘u continued its recovery, gaining strength and exhibiting more feisty natural behavior. It was placed on a conditioning pool for the first time on May 1. After watching the bird spend multiple days on the pool, HWC wildlife staff determined that the bird’s feathers were able to provide the necessary waterproofing and were encouraged to see the patient exhibiting normal behavior. All signs pointed towards release. Before the bird was ready to be released, HWC wildlife rehabilitation staff performed a unique procedure using dental epoxy generously provided by Kohala Dental Center to repair the bird’s damaged beak. The day before the May 5 release, the bird was banded by DOFAW staff with a band that was provided by Maui Save Our Seabirds and flown in

The mural project was coordinated by Council for Native Hawaiian Advancement (CNHA) member organization, Ho‘omaika‘i LLC. Word began on April 29 and continued over the course of six days, with the mural covering approximately 310 square feet at Sheraton’s Aloha Landing. The composition will be one of the first things that guests see as they arrive at the resort’s group entrance, whether by bus or shuttle. We are honored to have the opportunity to display Kaulukukui’s impressive work at our resort,” said Tetsuji Yamazaki, General Manager of Sheraton Maui Resort & Spa. “The mural is a beautiful depiction of this wahi pana, or special story place, Pu‘u Keka‘a.” The mural, named “Ke Ola o Pu‘u Keka‘a,” has been produced in Kaulukukui’s signature style, with strong contrasts and vibrant colors that blend to create an illustration of unity between man and the underwater world, a theme that can be found throughout his work. Kaulukukui took inspiration from childhood for the mural’s preliminary sketch; the artist has a personal connection to Pu‘u Keka‘a, where he spent time as a young boy snorkeling, playing and observing tropical fish, honu, plants, corals and sea creatures in their natural habitat. A classically trained oil painter, Kaulukukui studied fine art at the University of Hawaii and the School of the Art Institute of Chicago. He began drawing and creating at an early age, inspired by Hawaii’s natural beauty, abundant ocean life, and rich native culture. He currently works as a painter and muralist in Honolulu, and serves as ground operations manager of international marine conservation organization PangeaSeed Foundation. ■

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MAY 18, 2017

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News & Views

News Of The Weird MOTHER OF INVENTION Robotic models of living organisms are useful to scientists, who can study the effects of stimuli without risk to actual people. Northwestern University researchers announced in March that its laboratory model of the “female reproductive system” has reached a milestone: its first menstrual period. The “ovary,” using mouse tissue, had produced hormones that stimulated the system (uterus, cervix, vagina, fallopian tubes, liver) for 28 days, reaching the predictable result. Chief researcher Teresa Woodruff said she imagines eventually growing a model from tissue provided by the patient undergoing treatment.

RECURRING THEMES Chutzpah! Henry Wachtel, 24, continues in legal limbo after being found “not criminally responsible” for the death of his mother in 2014, despite having beaten her in the head and elsewhere up to 100 times–because he was having an epileptic seizure at that moment and has no memory of the attack. A judge must still decide the terms of Wachtel’s psychiatric hospitalization, but Wachtel’s mind is clear enough now that, in March, he demanded, as sole heir, payoff on his mother’s life insurance policy (which, under New York law, is still technically feasible).

EPIC SMUGGLERS In February, federal customs agents seized 22 pounds of illegal animal meat (in a wide array) at the Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport. Among the tasty items were raw chicken, pig and cow meat, brains, hearts, heads, tongues and feet–in addition to (wrote a reporter) “other body parts” (if there even are any other edible parts). In a typical day nationwide, U.S. Customs and Border Protection seizes about 4,600 smuggled plant or animal products.

HACKED VIBRATORS?! Yet another intimate accessory with weak security drew attention when hackers broke down a $249 Svakom Siime Eye personal vibrator in April, revealing a lazily created default password (“88888888”) and Wi-Fi network name (“Siime Eye”). Since the Eye’s camera and internet access facilitate livestream video of a user’s most personal body parts, anyone within Wi-Fi range can break in (and be entertained) by just driving around a city looking for the Siime Eye network.

EWWWW! Luu Cong Huyen, 58, in Yen Giao, Vietnam, is the most recent to attract reporters’ attention with disturbingly long fingernails. A March OddityCentral.com report, with cringe-inducing photos, failed to disclose their precise length, but

Huyen said he has not clipped them since a 2013 report on VietnamNet revealed that each measured up to 19.7 inches. Huyen explained (inadequately) that his nail obsession started merely as a hobby and that he is not yet over it. (The Guinness Book record is not exactly within fingertip reach: 73.5 inches per nail, by Shridhar Chillal of India.)

UPDATE For more than a decade, an “editor” has been roaming the streets at night in Bristol, England, “correcting” violations of standard grammar, lately being described as “The Apostrophiser” since much of his work involves adjusting (or often obliterating) that punctuation mark. On April 3, the BBC at last portrayed the vigilante in action, in a “ride-along” documentary that featured him using the special marking and climbing tools that facilitate his work. His first mission, in 2003, involved a government sign “Monday’s to Friday’s” (“ridiculous,” he said), and he recalled an even more cloying store sign–”Amys Nail’s”–as “so loud and in your face.”)

RIGHT TO REPAIR A “locked” cellphone (tied to a particular carrier), though a nuisance to purchasers, is only a several-hundred-dollar nuisance. A more serious crisis arises, as News of the Weird noted in 2015, when farmers buy $500,000 combines that they believe they “own,” but then find that the John Deere company has “locked” the machines’ sophisticated software, preventing even small repairs or upgrades until a Deere service rep shows up to enter the secret password (and, of course, leaves a bill!). Deere’s business model has driven some farmers recently to a black market of fearless Ukrainian hackers (some of the same risky dark-net outlaws believed to pose online dangers), who help put the farmers back on track. Eight state legislatures are presently considering overriding Deere’s contract to create a “right to repair.”

NO LONGER WEIRD? For the 31st consecutive Easter in the Philippines, Ruben Enaje, 57, was among the throngs of devout Christians who slashed their own torsos bloody, then flogged themselves repeatedly as they marched through the streets to demonstrate homage to God, and dozens of men in San Pedro Cutud, Santa Lucia and other villages replicated the crucifixion of Jesus by having sterilized 4-inch nails driven into their own arms and legs. When News of the Weird first encountered the Philippine phenomenon in 1989, the crucifixions had built a 40year history and still listed, as an official sponsor, the Philippines Department of Tourism (but no longer). (The Catholic Church, as usual, “banned” the extreme acts, to little effect.) ■

Ākea Eaton January 23, 1950 - April 23, 2017 Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent, to “Eh Brah!” c/o MauiTime, 16 S. Market St, Ste. 2K, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com

h Brah! This sistah is tired of you breaking off (or stealing) the mirror I installed in the driveway. That was number four! They’re on there for my safety and yours. Now I’ve got to install another one so I don’t hit you when I pull out. And I’m not the only one who uses it–the mail carrier, delivery drivers, gas company rep and the meter reader all use it, too. Awe brah, if you need a mirror, just come ask and I’ll make one for you! ■

Cleighton William Ku‘ualohaokalaniākea Eaton was born

Illustration by Ron Pitts mauiartistronpitts.com

DREW TOONZ

BY ANDREW MILLER

to father, Clayton Ku‘ualoha Eaton of Ka‘΃, and mother, Arline Wainaha Ku‘uleialoha Eaton of Pu‘uloa , on January 23rd, 1950 in Kalihi, O‘ahu. However, ɛkea would say, “Kanu ‘ia ka’u ʣwe ma Pu‘uloa “. Raised on ‘Ewa Beach Road, mere footsteps from the ocean, ɛkea spent his youth surßng with his younger brother Calvin and his infamous group of surf buddies, The ‘Ewa Beach Boys. His lifelong love affair with the ocean is one he would see through until his ßnal days. ɛkea graduated from Kamehameha High School Kapɜlama in 1968, an accomplishment he was enormously proud of and frequently displayed. He was intensely proud of his Hawaiian heritage and strikingly well-read on his culture’s history. An avid sports lover, ɛkea played football in high school and college at Arizona Western College, volleyball here on Maui, paddled canoe for both Hawaiian and Kihei Canoe Clubs and became a student of Jeet Kune Do. After marrying wife, Stacey (Andrade) Eaton and raising their three children, ɛkea became known as “Coach Cleigh” to a generation of Maui youth who played soccer in the 90’s and 2000’s. ɛkea dedicated his life to his family and opened his home to those who would later become his extended ‘ohana. For over 20 years, ɛkea was a devout Kahu and Wedding Ofßciate. He embodied spiritual sanctity and relished in blessing the countless couples that he married. “He ‘a‘ali‘i k΃ makani mai au, ‘a‘ohe makani nɜna e k΃la‘i. I am the wind withstanding ‘a‘ali‘i. No gale can push me over” (Pukui, 1983, p.60). The ‘a‘ali‘i bush, àexible but steadfast, can withstand the worst of gales-bending and twisting but seldom breaking. ɛkea was indeed an ‘a‘ali‘i k΃ makani and will forever be remembered as our ocean-loving guardian and everyone’s life coach. ɛkea is survived by his beloved wife, Stacey Andrade Eaton; son, Kaua Eaton; daughters, Kalena Eaton, Ke̝mailani Eaton and Cherie Kahahane; granddaughters, Mekia and Miliama Kekona-Eaton; grandsons, Keali‘i Kekona, Kaleo KahahaneDavis, Ka‘imi Kahahane-Davis, Kenohi Kahahane-Davis and Kamaka Kahahane-Davis; brother, Calvin Eaton; and countless hɜnai children. The celebration of his life is set for Saturday, May 20th at Hawaiian Canoe Club from 10 am-5 pm. The scattering of his ashes will be held on Sunday, May 21st at 9am at Kahului Harbor.

QUESTIONS, COMMENTS OR IDEAS? EMAIL NORTHSHORECARTOON@GMAIL.COM

MAY 18, 2017

‘2307:

WINTER’S DREAM’ We talk story with the filmmakers–including Maui’s own Ken Martinez Burgmaier– about their new sci-fi epic. BY JEN RUSSO

magine the year 2307. The Earth is frozen solid. The surface is uninhabitable. Life has moved underground. There, humanoid robots, originally built as slaves, are organizing a rebellion, and life hangs in the balance for a young kidnapped girl. Can a drugged-out, washed-up cop save her? Welcome to 2307: Winter’s Dream, a new science fiction movie from Maui filmmaker Kenneth K. Martinez Burgmaier, who’s already well known for many of his jazz and blues festivals and films like KiHo Alu Keola Beamer, Massacre at Kaupoa Beach and the short Ho`omau. There will be a special premiere of 2307: Winter’s Dream at the Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center this Wednesday, May 24 as part of the

10 MAY 18, 2017

PHOTO COURTESY FILMMAKER

MauiFEST Hawaii Hana Film Festival series. I recently spoke with Burgmaier about how the film project got started. “Joey Curtis is the writer and the director,” says Martinez Burgmaier. “He’s a great writer. He did the writing for our film Blue Valentine that got nominated for an Academy award. We also did The Pimp and Rose with Jack Nicholas’s daughter, Lorraine Nicholson in it. Derek Cianfrance, the director for Blue Valentine, and Joey Curtis used to work for my film production company for years. Derek started writing Blue Valentine in Jamaica on a shoot with me at the Jamaica Reggae fest. We did our first movie in 1997 that went to Sundance called Brother Tied. We have all been working together for a long time.”

The team, with the addition of the other producer, Robert Beaumont, met in film school. Though 2307: Winter’s Dream was their first sci-fi, director Joey Curtis says it’s one of his favorite genres and he was really inspired by the project, the idea of which came from the lead actor, Paul Sidhu. “Winter’s Dream started as a work-for-hire writing assignment,” says Curtis. “Eventually after a year writing the script, I earned my spot as director. The star of the film, Paul Sidhu, gave me a half-page treatment about his ideas for the film. His concept was very much like the original Blade Runner, which is one of my favorite films. I knew that we were going to shoot Winter’s Dream on a budget that would be lower than the cost of catering food for a $100 million superhero

movie, so instead of trying to compete with Hollywood, I set out to tell a heartfelt story about a future policeman, Bishop, who is down and out after the death of his wife at the hands of a rogue humanoid. Fortunately, our financier warmed to this idea and eventually gave me a lot of freedom to explore a future Earth that’s somewhat of an abysmal, hopeless place that has lost touch with nature and God.” But writing the story is just step one. The plot takes a number of twists and turns exploring this world, and developing the characters that Curtis presents. How they accomplish the filming with a small budget is itself an incredible story. “Pre-production was an arduous affair lasting another year,” says Curtis. “Produc-

PHOTO COURTESY KENNETH MARTINEZ BURGMAIER

Producer Ken Martinez Burgmaier and Director Joey Curtis

away. I knew almost every line of dialogue, sound effect and music in Star Wars and my divorced parents always had fun having me “do the bar scene” or “do the run on the Death Star” for their stoner friends.” Even though he was a movie buff, he almost went for a medical profession. “I was paying for my own college,” says Curtis. “I decided to go Pre-Med classes for the first two years in junior college, while I thought long and hard about what I wanted to do with my life. I asked myself the question, What did you like to do as a kid, thinking the answer would most likely be the thing that could fulfill me or sustain me throughout a lifetime. But the answer kept circling in my mind was ‘The only thing you really liked doing was playing with your Star Wars men and creating imaginary worlds.’ I knew I couldn’t make a living doing that. So I went to the library to check out a bunch of books on how to invest in real estate. I had like 20 of those books but along the way I stumbled on the biography of George Lucas, Skywalking. When I got home you can guess that the only book I ended up reading was Skywalking. That’s when I first learned that there was something called film school. The moment I finished that book, I put the horse blinders on and began to study cinema for the next 22 years of my life, all the way up to the present day.” Writing and directing independent films in LA sounds glamorous, but for Curtis, the reality is somewhat different. “My feature length directorial debut was an epic Westside story tale set in Southern California called Quattro Noza,” says Curtis. “I spent two years living on the road and couch surfing for that film researching in the streets of LA at night while editing Hollywood movie trailers by day. Ken would fly me around the world to shoot and edit his jazz TV shows and concerts. I worked my fingers to the bone in order to save the money needed to shoot the early stages of that film using Ken’s little Sony PD-100, the original three-chip digital camera. Once I gathered enough footage, I went to New York and found my producer, Fredric King who financed principal photography, post-production and basically my life so that I could focus on the film. Ken came through with finishing funds and we were blessed to be chosen for competition at Sundance in 2003, winning the best cinematography award and beating all the

to get closer to the truth, unbridled by the corporate machine. However, the second definition of ‘independent’ is where our dilemma begins–it’s not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence. Unless you’re independently wealthy enough to finance your own films and media, then as a filmmaker you’re completely reliant on other people to invest in you, your talent and story. There’s just no way around it. So as an independent filmmaker you not only have to master your craft but you have to manifest and attract other like-minded individuals who have money and a desire to invest in something that they feel has meaning and/or the chance to make their money back with profit potential. At least, that’s the goal for conscious filmmakers.” Of course, there’s one more goal for filmmakers. That is where Maui’s premiere of 2307: Winter’s Dream comes in. Curtis wants people here to enjoy this film, as much as he did creating it. “I really hope that folks of all ages will have an experience while watching this film,” says Curtis. “When I go to the movies, I want to feel something, I want to go somewhere and be immersed in a world. So when I make films I try to conjure emotion, action, adventure, sexuality and of course comedy–all the elements that make a cinematic fantasy that reflects reality. Most of all, I hope the film holds up a mirror to the audience and inspires people to seek out transformation and growth in their own lives. To become aware of what is happening in our world today and want to make it a better place.” ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso For more news articles, visit: mauitime.com/news

2307: Winter’s Dream Wednesday, May 24 5:30pm and 8:00pm Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center Get tickets at Eventbrite: Wintersdreammaui.eventbrite.com For more info go to Facebook.com/wintersdream

PHOTO COURTESY KENNETH MARTINEZ BURGMAIER

er Robert Beaumont and I had to find the crew to build the props, design and create the costumes, find the locations, cast the actors, etc. Once we were ready for production, the shoot was split up into three phases. In Phase 1, we shot all of the ‘underground’ interiors here in Los Angeles. I started editing and cut together a powerful teaser with full VFX and sound which my other producer, Ken Martinez Burgmaier, used to raise more money, for Phase 2.” Phase 2 was the part where it got icy cold. The team needed a very winter white location, and decided on Buffalo, New York. “We all flew out to Buffalo during one of the worst winters in decades,” says Curtis. “All the exteriors on the ice really were on the ice–Lake Erie to be exact, where it was -20 without the wind! Being a SoCal desert rat, this was cold for me, but you wouldn’t believe how tough the Buffalonian people are. We had real men come out and lay on the ice shirtless for $50 without one complaint! That would never happen in LA. Folks out there were so excited to make a movie, the police force became part of our crew and I will always love them.” Cut to Curtis’s SoCal garage, for the movie magic of Phase 3. “Then came Phase 3, in which we actually used my garage to shoot all the green screen special effects shots for the film,” says Curtis. “Post-production was a hardcore year of editing tons of footage here in LA and at Ken’s house in Makawao, while working remotely with our VFX company Platinum Platypus way out in Long Island.” Ironically, Curtis wasn’t one of those kids who knew from the get-go that he would go into filmmaking. “I came from a broken home and found most of my heroes on screen watching old TV westerns like The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly, For A Few Dollars More, Shane, The Searchers and so on,” he says. “I also remember discovering amazing art films like The Swimmer starring Burt Lancaster, American Graffiti And Thx-1138. I saw Star Wars at the theater at least 20 times. Raiders Of The Lost Ark, Superman and Time Bandits which were some of my favorites. I used to listen to the 8-track tape of Star Wars while driving in my mom’s Volkswagen Super Beetle, then put on the record at home [while] gazing at the fold-out pictures and dreaming of a galaxy far, far

multi-million dollar star studded films shot on 35MM, which was quite a feat on those early three-chip digital cameras. We were also nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at Sundance and in 2004 we were nominated for two Independent Spirit Awards for Best First Feature and Best Cinematography. The film premiered theatrically at Mann’s Chinese Theater in Hollywood, distributed by Lionsgate under the title Streets Of Legend.” But the ability to make a good film is only part of the work. There’s also the complicated matter of distribution. “Distribution, that’s the hard part with it,” says Martinez Burgmaier. “With our movie Quattro Noza, that was picked up by Lionsgate. We learned some things with that. With Winter’s Dream, we went to the Cannes Film Festival market and we sold to 12 countries, which is pretty huge. Right now it’s going to Japan, UK and it just got translated into German. Now the distribution company is changing the name–they can do that. It’s called Winter’s Soldier in UK and it’s called Humanoid in Germany. Our American deal is with Vertical. We’re showing our Maui premiere as a special viewing with the MauiFEST Hana Film Festival Series.” Still, it’s painfully clear that making independent films in Hollywood can be a life-threatening career choice. “The life challenge is poverty,” says Curtis. “The only people who make a living in Independent cinema are the distributors. They take everything, and I mean everything. The creative challenge is the daunting task of trying to make something outside of the corporate system. Saying something truthful and honest that’s not beholden to shareholders or executives. All that said, independent filmmaking is a vocation that’s not for the faint of heart.” But if so, why do they do it? “I think the most important reason to make independent films is self-evident within the definition of ‘independent,’” says Curtis. “It’s free from outside control; not depending on another’s authority. Every single one of my hyper-talented friends who’s making a decent living in the film/ TV/commercial industry is in some way working for a corporate entity who is selling products, ideas, values, lifestyles and culture. And the vast majority of what they’re selling is detrimental to humans and the planet. Making films independently gives filmmakers the opportunity

On Set In Buffalo New York

MAY 18, 2017

Food & Drink

by Jen Russo

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DINNER – DESSERT – BYOB

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s the days get longer over Haleakala, that means it’s time for happy hour at Hali‘imaile General Store. The restaurant launched their first happy hour last year, and while they put it on hiatus for the busy winter, it’s now back–Monday through Friday, from 2:30pm to 5pm. Sit indoor or outdoors while you take in the ambiance of one of Upcountry’s most iconic restaurants and order from their happy hour cocktail and brand new bar menu. Hali‘imaile General Store will have $6 wines by the glass, $5 martinis and well cocktails and $4 Maui Brew Company beers. Then there are $8 cocktails made with Pau Vodka that’s actually distilled right across the street at Hali‘imaile Distilling Co. If you wanted to tie in a visit to the distillery, they have daily tours. I’ve walked over or booked them on Haliimailedistilling.com. Of course, happy hour wouldn’t be complete without supping up on some of the chic pupus that HGS has waiting for you. They have an antipasto plate for $14 that’s

12 MAY 18, 2017

brimming with meats and cheeses, olives, nuts, pickles, pineapple mustard, truffle honey and crostini. Their selection of small plates for just $10 includes shrimp cocktail, ahi tartare and smoked salmon tacos. Praying for crab fonduta? Yes, I was, too. It’s there on the flatbreads menu along with tandoori lamb, mixed mushroom and grilled vegetable topping options all for $10 each. There’s even a $9 crostini dish selection that changes along with the whimsy of the chef. Look for toppings like their Caprese of fresh pulled mozzarella, ovendried tomato slice, basil pesto aioli and micro arugula; Prime Rib in Au Jus with miso mustard, cucumber kim chee, scallions; White Bean with rosemary aioli, white bean puree, micro greens; Blue Cheese and local honey aioli, asian pear, and gorgonzola; Smashed Avocado Lime, pickled jalapeños, roasted corn, evoo; Caramelized Onion, bacon, blue cheese, chives, or Brie and Grape with sweet pea guacamole. They even have a triple threat spicy pimento cheese dip for $8 that features diced pimentos, pickled jalapeños, mayo, dill and crostini points. For more information, call 808-572-2666 or go to Hgsmaui.com. ■ jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso For more foodie news, visit: mauitime.com/food-drink

by Jen Russo

Food & Drink

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’m always looking for a new lavish brunch spot. But not everyone has the weekend off to spend brunching, which is why Sarento’s on the Beach just launched a new menu that offers their extravagant breakfast and new lunch items every day of the week. If you’ve never been to Sarento’s, there’s no better time to go. They’re known for elegant dinners, but have been doing breakfast for the last four years or so. Most recently they added lunch and extended the breakfast offerings until 3pm. Their location kills it along Keawakapu beach (they have parking in the back of the restaurant, just off South Kihei Road). Their dining room sits nearly on the sand, and every seat in the house offers a stunning ocean view. I couldn’t resist a swim after breakfast, but that might not be for everyone. What is for everyone is their selection of tasty breakfast items. My server recommended the crepes stuffed with berries, Tahitian vanilla pastry cream and champagne lilikoi sauce. I couldn’t resist this signature dish, and it was spectacular. They also have French toast for those with a sweet tooth. I also love their various Benedicts. The Pacific is a crab cake Benedict with a choron sauce–a hollandaise with a zing

in it. It’s excellent, but so is the Canadian bacon if you’re a purist. They also have a veggie or a meat lover’s omelette, huevos rancheros, a breakfast burrito and loco moco. For the lighter side, there’s granola, Greek yogurt and fruit. It’s a well-rounded, well-executed breakfast menu. What’s more is they make excellent hash browns. My family loves hash browns–Sarento's does them fresh and crisp on the outside. Every order came out perfect. They have a great lunch menu, too. Burgers, fried chicken sando, beef tenderloin or turkey saltimbocca sandwich and fish tacos all had an ingredient or two that made it stand out. Then there’s the spaghetti and filet mignon meatballs or pasta primavera for those with a really big appetite. Cobb and chicken Ceasar salads, ahi carpaccio and calamari round out the lighter starter fares. Lunch and breakfast items range from $14 to $20. They also offer a great selection of breakfast cocktails. You can order a Bloody Mary, Screwdriver, Bellini or Mimosa for $7 from 7am to 11am. Sarento’s serves their breakfast from 7am to 3pm daily. They also have a happy hour from 3pm to 5:30pm. Then dinner service from 5:30 to 10pm. For more information or to make your reservation go to Sarentosonthebeach.com. ■

FRESH

SUSHI — IN THE —

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jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso For more foodie news, visit: mauitime.com/food-drink

MAY 18, 2017 13

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A&E

by Suzanne Kayian

The Power Of Positive Singing MARIA MULDAUR AND HER RED HOT BLUESIANA BAND IS COMING TO MAUI come in contact with feels it. And I feel like– now more than ever–my mission of bringing a positive message to people is even more important than it was before.” Muldaur shared the story of preparing for a tribute show for the late Allen Toussaint. While planning her set, she delved into Toussaint’s material and discovered a song he wrote in the 1970s called “Optimism Blues.” Maria and her band fell in love with it. And when they played it in concert, the response was so favorable that they incorporated it into their repertoire. Muldaur says when she meets people after her concerts, the value of playing music filled with love and uplifting messages is reinforced. “People have always come to my shows and enjoyed themselves,” she said. “But now, they come up to me at the CD table and say, ‘Thank you so much. I really needed this.’ It’s like we are bringing some kind of healing medicine to people. I feel blessed that this has been my job all of my life.” Since launching her career, Muldaur has recorded 40 albums–an average of one per year. She maintains a respectable tour schedule, playing a mixture of solo gigs and festivals in California, across the US and around the world. As with many acts who became famous in the 1970s–Santana and Journey in-

cluded–the demand for live shows continues regardless of what is at the top of the iTunes charts. Muldaur, who characterizes her career as a long adventurous odyssey through various forms of American roots music, is currently touring with her power trio, The Red Hot Bluesiana Band. “That’s a word I made up about 20 years ago to describe the New Orleansflavored, blues, R&B, swamp funk that we like to play,” she said. “This kind of music is beyond being trendy,” she says. “The kind of music I love originated many, many years ago but it is timeless music and it has timeless messages. We always have a good time and audiences seem to dig it. We aren’t stopping anytime soon. Why should I? I love what I do and as long as people want to listen, I’m going to keep singing and exploring and looking for great new tunes.” Maria Muldaur and her Red Hot Bluesiana Band will perform at the MACC on May 25. The stop is part of a four-island Hawaii tour in support of her self-produced release Steady Love. Tickets for the Maui show are available at Mauiarts.org. ■ editor@mauitime.com For more A&E news, visit: mauitime.com/entertainment

PHOTO BY STEVE PARENTE

here seems to be a musical connection between the San Francisco Bay Area and Maui. Just this year, we’ve had Journey and Santana perform at the Maui Arts and Cultural Center (MACC). And on Mother’s Day, Bay Area native Michael Franti took things to a higher level at the MACC with an uplifting concert that was both musically amazing and a medium for positive change. On Thursday, May 25, Bay Area local Maria Muldaur will take the stage at the MACC’s McCoy Studio Theater. Muldaur rose to the top of the charts in 1974 with the mega-hit “Midnight at the Oasis.” Throughout her career, she’s played a spectrum of genres from jazz to folk and from pop to what she calls a funky, bluesy, spicy, swampy New Orleans piano sound. But what’s similar between her and Franti is the way they embrace the spirit in music–and their intention to spread positivity and love. Genre and musical notes are just vehicles, Muldaur says–vehicles that should be bringing positive energy to people. “I don’t see any other reason to make music,” she said. “It never was about fame and for-

tune and being at the top of the pop charts. That happened to me; it was a happy accident back when I had my big hit ‘Midnight at the Oasis’ but I was never motivated by fame, fortune, that kind of pop success.” Muldaur, who is not a songwriter, has maintained that attitude while developing the fine art of choosing material. Years ago, a Los Angeles-based producer suggested she record the Hollies song “You’re No Good.” “Why would I choose to do a song like that?” Muldaur responded. “Couples are telling that to each other; parents are telling that to their children; children are telling that to their parents. Why would I want to spend a moment of my energy amplifying that message and putting it out over the airwaves?” She did not record the song but Linda Ronstadt, whom she calls her dear, dear soul sister, did and Muldaur points out that Ronstadt “took a lot of money to the bank on that one. “But I don’t regret that I didn’t do it,” she continued. “Because to me, why make music if it is not spreading a positive message. Right now, there is kind of a dark cloud looming over this country. Without going into a lot of political detail, suffice it to say, everybody I

PHOTO BY STEVE PARENTE

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Picks

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This Week's Picks THURSDAY, MAY 18 PICNIC FOR POKI – The next Picnic For Poki Hawaiian Music Concert will feature Pamela Polland, founder of the Hawaiian music group Keaolani. She’ll be joined by hula dancers from Halau Hula o Leilehua and she’ll sing a variety of Hawaiian classics. Bring a low-backed lawn chair or blanket, your lunch, and don’t forget to enjoy some complimentary fresh baked cookies. Free. 11am. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Church, (103 S. High St., Wailuku); 808-871-7720. Photo courtesy of Facebook/ Pamela Anna Polland

THURSDAY, MAY 18

NICK SWARDSON – Nick Swardson will do stand-up at the Mauii Arts and Cultural Center (MACC). Swardson is a great comedian, actor, writer and producer. Recognized in the entertainment community for both small and silver screen productions, you might remember him from Reno: 911, Just Go With It, Grandma’s Boy and You Don’t Mess With the Zohan. $25-45. 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural g. Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org. Photo courtesy of Facebook/Nick Swardson

FRIDAY, MAY 19

HALEAKALA CRATER SERVICE TRIP – Get ready for the next Haleakala Crater Service Trip with Friends of Haleakala National Park. They’re seeking volunteers for an upcoming service trip that will take place June 10-12. The focus of this trip will be on protecting native plants. Volunteers will stay at the Kapalaoa Cabin on Saturday and Sunday night, and hike out of the Crater on Monday. Learn more and register online, then contact the trip leader listed on the website. Free. 8am. Haleakala National Park, (Haleakala Hwy., Kula); 808-205-4067; Fhnp.org. Photo courtesy of FHNP

THIRD FRIDAY TOWN PARTY – Check out the Third Friday town party in Makawao. The evening will be dedicated to the grads, so bring your family and friends to celebrate. There’ll be live entertainment and opportunities to taste ono grinds from Maui food trucks and vendors. Peruse the classic car showcase while your kids have fun in the Keiki Zone with face painting, balloon animals and a spider jumper bungie trampoline. Free. 5:30pm. Makawao Town Party, (Baldwin Ave., Makawao); 808-270-7710; Mauifridays.com. Photo: Flickr/Dana

FRIDAY, F FR IDAY Y, M MAY MA AY 19 ‘FIND ‘FINDING DORY’ – The MACC’s Starry Night Cinema will screen Finding Dory. Watc Watch Dory, Nemo and Marlin as they embark on a mission to find Dory’s parents. They’ll ride currents, avoid obstacles and try to keep from getting captured b by the Marine Life Institute. Bring blankets or low-backed beach chairs. No ou outside food or beverages are allowed. Free. 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org. Photo: M Movieweb.com

NIGHT CLUB ON THE SEA – Maui’s Night Club on the Sea with Club Ali‘i Nui is setting sail and guests are invited to board a luxuriously hip catamaran for a night to remember. There’ll be music by top Maui DJs, a premium bar full of tasty cocktail concoctions, dancing, socializing and more. 21+. $99. 8:30pm. Club Ali`inui, (Slip 56, Ma`alaea Harbor); 808-875-0333; Clubaliinui.com. Photo courtesy of Facebook/Ali‘i Nui Sailing Charters

SATURDAY, SATU UR RD DAY, MAY 20 START-UP TOOLS TO CLEAR THE MIND – This s is a self-help workshop that will take place at the Temple of Peace in Haiku. Do you have a lot going on in your mind? Are you looking to find a calm and peaceful balance in your everyday thoughts? Author Kathy Williams will provide tools to clear the “money mind” and teach you how to end that constant mind chatter. $15. u 10:30am. Temple of Peace Maui, (575 Haiku om. Rd.); 808-575-5220; Templeofpeacemaui.com. Photo: Flickr/Laura Dahl

BALDWIN BEACH CLEAN-UP – There will be a Community Clean-up at Baldwin Beach. Bring your own cup and gloves. Refreshments, snacks and live music will be provided. Malama Maui Nui will hand out trash bags and pickers. If you have a truck and want to help haul out garbage, please call for more info. An afterparty will happen at a TBA location after the beach is clean. Free. 10am. Baldwin Beach Park, (Alawai Rd., Paia); 808-463-9333; Jennfoolery@gmail.com. Photo: Flickr/Frank Hamm

SATURDAY, MAY 20 ‘TIBETAN ILLUSION DESTROYER’ – A 3D screening of the new film Tibetan Illusion Destroyer and a concert with Sarah Cahill will happen at the MACC. Cahill will open the evening by performing works by composer Lou Harrison. Then guests can see the premiere of Tibetan Illusion Destroyer, a film by Emmy-winning filmmaker Tom Vendetti. $30. 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org. Photo of Sarah Cahill courtesy Ebb & Flow Arts

RUSHAD EGGLESTONE – See Rushad Eggleston in concert at the Maui Coffee Attic. Eggleston is a renowned cellist, and his performances are said to spread joy through melodies, songs, mythical languages and rogue cello vibrations. It should be an interesting night! $25-40. 7pm. Maui Coffee Attic, (59 Kanoa St., Wailuku); 808-250-9555; Rushad.net. Photo courtesy of Facebook/ Rushed Eggleston

SATURDAY, MAY 20 BENDS & BREWS – The next Bends & Brews will take place at Maui Brewing Company in Kihei. Enjoy a pop-up yoga class taught by Amber Tesors, then savor some brews in MBC’s Kihei Tasting Room. Cost includes the yoga class and your first drink. Must be 21+ to participate. Reservations recommended. $20. 10:45am. Maui Brewing Company, (605 Lipoa Pkwy., Kihei); 808-213-3002; Mauibrewingco.com. Photo courtesy of Facebook/Maui Brewing Co.

‘WEST SIDE STORY’ – Enjoy an orchestral tribute to West Side Story at the Iao Theater on Saturday, May 20 and Sunday, May 21. Directed by Robert E. Wills, the Maui Chamber Orchestra will present this classic love story in full glory. The orchestra will feature 44 performers and 22 vocalists. Showtimes are Saturday at 7:30pm, Sunday at 3pm with conversations with the conductor at 1:30pm on Sunday. $27-55. 3pm. Iao Theater, (68 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-242-6969; Mauionstage.com. Photo: Flickr/Beliza Mendes

THURSDAY, MAY 25

SUNDAY, MAY 21 PIERO RESTA EXHIBIT – You can see Exhibit: Piero Resta-Illuminatus at the MACC from Sunday, May 21 through Sunday, July 16. It will honor the life, works and passions of the late Maui artist Piero Resta. The selection of paintings, sculptures and personal archives on display reveal the influence and relationship between his Italian heritage, ancient traditions and the vibrant life force of his family home in Kaupo. Free. 10am. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org. Piero Resta artwork courtesy the MACC

TREVOR NOAH - Trevor Noah, the host of Comedy medy Central’s The Daily Show, making a stop on Mauii with eshhis current tour. His political satire is crisp and refreshex ing, endlessly translating politics, racism, media, sex ui and pop culture into laughs. His first show on Maui sold out so fast, he added a second show at 10pm.. $79.50, $99.50. Maui Arts and Cultural Center (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org. Photo courtesy Paul Mobley

MAY 18, 2017 17

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18 MAY 18, 2017

Film

by Barry Wurst II

'Redneck Heaven' Even after 40 years, ‘Smokey and the Bandit‘ is still an exciting ride ★★★★★ Rated R / 96 Min.

t one point in U.S. pop culture, redneck mania was all the rage. During the late 1970s, C.W. McCall’s “Convoy” was the number one song in America, The Dukes of Hazzard became the most popular TV show on the airwaves and Burt Reynolds’ Smokey and the Bandit emerged a gigantic hit. How big? After Star Wars, it was the second biggest smash of 1977 (actually, I question this, as the same year’s Close Encounters of the Third Kind and Saturday Night Fever were in theaters even longer but leave the nerdy movie trivia to me). Reynolds was one of the most popular movie stars of the ‘70s and Smokey and the Bandit was the monster success that put him over the top. The film itself, directed by stuntman legend Hal Needham, is still a kick even though it turns 40 this year. Starring as the Bandit, Reynolds plays an outlaw declared a “legend” by his underground fan base of Citizens Band (CB) radio fanatics. The Bandit is offered

$80,000 to drive a truck containing 400 bootlegged cases of Coors from Texas to Georgia (the beverage used to be illegal east of the Rockies). Along with his truck drivin’ buddy “Snowman” (played by country star Jerry Reed), a basset hound, a runaway bride (Sally Field) and a turbocharged Pontiac Trans Am, the Bandit powers through speed traps and evades multiple law enforcers. When he crosses paths with the repulsive and persistent Texas sheriff Buford T. Justice (Jackie Gleason), a cross-country chase ensues. The movie, and Reynolds, exudes an easy going charm. Fields (who was just escaping TV infamy as The Flying Nun) shows real movie star glamour. While Reynolds plays a pretty boy narcissist all too well, Fields carries the movie the same way Sandra Bullock stole Speed from Keanu Reeves. Gleason, the TV comedy legend once referred to correctly as “The Great One,” is also in fine form as Justice. The role is ridiculous but Gleason (appearing tan, robust and happy to steal every scene he’s in) makes the character loathsome and hilarious. There’s a line early on in Smokey and the Bandit where Reed declares he’s gone

At least he's not texting

to “redneck heaven.” This is exactly where I suspect the movie takes place, as we’re in for 90 minutes of cheesy CB radio lingo, thrilling car chases, smash ups and banjo music. None of this is remotely PC, as there are midget jokes, sexist quips and (of course) the Bandit’s car sports a Confederate flag license plate. But Smokey and the Bandit also has a surprising number of black actors (like George Reynolds) who play intelligent, non-stereotypical characters, which wasn’t a given in this era. It’s all very corny but fast and full of real-deal, CGI-free auto stunts and smashups. There’s a surprising scene in the first hour where the Bandit stops at a greasy spoon diner and Justice, who has never

seen the Bandit, sits down next to him and starts talking story. It’s the film’s funniest scene and gives us the clearest idea of what this movie actually is: a live-action Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd cartoon. Smokey and the Bandit is a relic but still a highly influential, exciting ride that rarely slows down. It’s also better than any of its sequels, Reynolds’ later Cannonball Run movies and scores of rip-offs. In fact, you may have heard of the film franchise this obviously inspired, the one with the words “Fast” and “Furious” in the titles. Smokey and the Bandit plays Sunday, May 21 and Wednesday, May 24 at the Maui Mall Megaplex at 2pm and 7pm. ■

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Film

by Alex Mitchell

Showtimes KA‘AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka‘ahumanu Shopping Center, Kahului. 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm) 2307 Winter’s Dream- NR- WED 5:00 8:00. Alien: Covenant- R- 2D THU 7:00 9:45. 2D FRI-

SAT 12:00 2:40 4:20 5:20 7:00 8:00 9:40 10:40, 2D SUN-THU 12:00 2:40 4:20 5:20 7:00 8:00. Diary of a Wimpy Kid- PG- 2D THU 5:00 7:15 9:30. 2D FRI-SAT 10:30 11:30 12:40 1:45 2:50 5:00 7:15 9:35, 2D SUN-THU 10:30 11:30 12:40 1:45 2:50 5:00 7:15. Snatched-R- 2D THU 11:00 12:15 1:15 2:30 3:30 4:45 5:45 7:00 8:00. 2D FRI-SAT 10:45 1:00 3:15 5:30 7:45 10:00, 2D SUN-THU 10:45 1:00 3:15 5:30 7:45. The Fate of the Furious- PG13- 2D THU 10:30 1:30. 2D FRI-SAT 10:45 1:35 4:25 7:20 10:15, 2D SUN-THU 10:45 1:35 4:25 7:20. Beauty and the Beast-PG- 2D THU 11:10 2:00 4:50 7:45. 2D FRI-WED 12:30 3:15 6:00, 2D THU 3:15 6:00. The Lost City of Z- PG13- 2D THU 10:30 1:30 4:30 7:30. 2D FRI-SAT 9:00. Smurfs: Lost Village- PG- 2D THU 11:30 2:00 4:30. Can’t Help Falling In Love- NR- 2D THU 7:00.

MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, Kahului, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: M-Th until 6pm, F-Su until 3:30pm) In Our Hands: Battle For Jerusalem- NR- 2D TUE 7:00. Baywatch-R- 2D WED 7:00 10:00, 2D THU

(1:00 4:00) 7:00 10:00. Smokey and the Bandit 40th Anniversary (1977)NR- 2D SUN 2:00 7:00, WED 2:00 7:00. Alien: Covenant- R- 2D THU 7:00 10:00. 2D FRI (11:30 1:00 2:20 4:00 4:30) 7:00 7:30 9:40 10:00, SAT-SUN (11:30 1:00 2:20) 4:00 4:30 7:00 7:30 9:40 10:00, MON-WED (11:30 1:00 2:20 4:00 4:30) 7:00 7:30 9:40 10:00. Diary of a Wimpy Kid- PG- 2D THU 5:00 7:00 10:30. FRI (12:00 2:10 5:10) 7:20 10:20 SAT-SUN (12:00 2:10) 5:10 7:20 10:20, MON-TUE (12:00 2:10 5:10)

7:20 10:20, WED (11:30 2:10 4:40) 7:20 10:20. Everything, Everything- PG13- 2D THU 5:00 7:30 10:00. 2D FRI (11:20 1:50 5:20) 7:50 10:10, SAT (11:20 1:50) 5:20 7:50 10:10, SUN (11:20 2:40) 5:20 7:50 10:10, MON-WED (11:20 1:50 5:20) 7:50 10:10. King Arthur: Legend of the Sword- PG13- 2D THU 12:20 4:00 6:40 10:20. 3D THU 2:50 3:30 7:10. 2D FRI (11:20 2:15 4:20) 7:10 10:20, SAT-SUN (11:20 2:15) 4:20 7:10 10:20, MON-WED (11:20 2:15 4:20) 7:10 10:20. 3D FRI (12:40 3:40) 6:40 9:30, SAT (12:40) 3:40 6:40 9:30, SUN (12:40) 3:40 9:30, MON-WED (12:40 3:40) 6:40 9:30. Snatched- R- 2D THU 11:20 2:00 5:00 7:40 10:40. 2D FRI (11:50 2:30 5:10) 7:40 10:30, SAT (11:50 2:30) 5:10 7:40 10:30, SUN (2:30) 5:10 7:40 10:30, MON (11:50 2:30 5:10) 7:40 10:30, TUE (11:20 2:10 4:30) 7:40 10:30, WED (11:50 2:30 5:10) 7:40. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2- PG13- 2D THU 11:40 12:40 2:50 4:20 6:00 7:00 9:10 10:00. 3D THU 12:10 1:40 3:20 3:50 7:20 9:40 10:10. 2D FRI (12:10 12:40 3:30 4:00) 6:50 7:20 9:40 10:10, SAT (12:10 12:40) 3:30 4:00 6:50 7:20 9:40 10:10, SUN-MON (12:10 12:40) 3:30 4:00 6:50 7:20 9:40 10:10, TUE-WED (12:10 12:40 3:30 4:00) 6:50 7:20 9:40 10:10. 3D FRI (11:40 1:20 3:00 4:30) 6:20 7:40 10:40, SAT (11:40 1:20 3:00) 4:30 6:20 7:40 10:40, SUN (1:20 3:00) 4:30 6:20 7:40 10:40, MON-TUE (11:40 1:20 3:00 4:30) 6:20 7:40 10:40, WED (11:40 1:20 3:00 4:30) 7:40 10:40. The Fate of the FuriousPG13- 2D THU 1:10 4:10 7:10 10:25. 2D FRI (11:30 2:10 4:40) 7:30 9:50, SAT (11:30 2:10) 4:40 7:30 9:50, SUN (11:30) 4:40 6:30 9:50, MON (11:30 2:10 4:40) 7:30 9:50, TUE (11:20 1:40 4:30) 9:50, WED (11:30 4:40) 9:50. The Circle- PG13- 2D THU 1:50. 2D FRI-WED 10:40.

THURS | 5/18 Born in China- G- 2D THU 12:00. 2D FRI-WED 11:20. How To Be A Latin Lover- PG13- 2D THU 11:30

2:20 5:10 8:00. Colossal-R- 2D THU 11:20 2:10 7:50. Gifted- PG13- 2D THU 12:30 10:40. The Boss Baby-PG- 2D THU 11:30 2:50 4:30 9:30.

MARK JOHNSTONE & FRIENDS 6:30-8:30pm • No Cover!

FRI | 5/19

90’S NIGHT WITH DJ BLAST 10pm • $10

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front St., Lahaina, 808-249-2222 (Matinees: Tue all shows, until 6pm every other day) Diary of a Wimpy Kid- PG- 2D FRI-SUN 12:15

2:45 5:00 7:30 9:50, MON 12:15 2:45 5:00 7:30, TUE 12:15 2:45 5:00 7:30 9:50, WED 12:15 2:45 5:00 7:30. King Arthur: Legend of the Sword- PG13- 2D THU 1:00 7:10. 3D THU 4:00. 2D FRI-WED 1:00 7:10, 3D FRI-SUN 4:00 10:10, 3D MON 4:00, 3D TUE 4:00 10:10, 3D WED 4:00. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2- PG13- 2D THU 12:30 7:10. 3D THU 3:40. 2D FRI-WED 12:30 7:00, 3D FRI-SUN 3:40 10:00, 3D MON 3:40, 3D TUE 3:40 10:00, 3D WED 3:40. The Fate of the Furious- PG13- 2D THU 12:45 3:45 6:50.

SAT | 5/20

SATURDAY NIGHT AT CHARLEY’S – JUST GOOD FUN No Cover

SUN | 5/21

BREAKFAST SERVED 7AM DON’T MISS OUR BLOODY MARY BAR!

MON | 5/22

CHARLEY’S LIVE BAND OPEN MIC & JAM

7PM-10PM • NO COVER TUES | 5/23

PAT SIMMONS JR.

6:30PM-8:30PM • NO COVER WED | 5/24

RANDALL ROSPOND

6:30PM-8:30PM • NO COVER 142 HANA HWY

PAIA

808.579.8085

Alien: Covenant opens this week EVENTS

NEW THIS WEEK

NOW PLAYING

ALIEN: COVENANT - R - Sci Fi/Horror - In yet another Alien sequel, humans go into space, then get eaten by ravaging space aliens. The end. 122 min.

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST - PG - Fantasy/Musical - Emma Watson stars in this live-action version of the famous fairy tale in which a young woman falls in love with a buffalo. Also stars Dan Stevens. 129 min.

BAYWATCH - R - Action/Comedy - Yet another stupid TV show gets rebooted because Hollywood hates all things creative and imaginative. Stars The Rock and Zac Efron. DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: THE LONG HAUL PG - Comedy/Family - A family road trip goes way, way off course. Been there, done that. 91 min. EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING - PG-13 - Drama/Romance - A teen who’s somehow allergic to everything falls for the boy next door. 96 min. IN OUR HANDS: BATTLE FOR JERUSALEM - NR - Documentary - Story of an Israeli Army paratrooper brigade during the Six-Day War. Produced by CBN [Christian Broadcasting Network] Documentaries. 109 min. SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT - PG - Action/ Comedy - Special 40th anniversary screening of the Burt Reynolds/Sally Field movie about a beer smuggler chased by redneck cops. See this week’s movie review. 96 min. 2307: WINTER’S DREAM - NR - Sci-Fi - A future soldier tries to hunt down the leader of a humanoid rebellion. 101 min.

BORN IN CHINA - G - Documentary - Disneynature presents this look at young pandas, golden monkeys and snow leopards in China. 76 min. THE CIRCLE - PG13 - Drama/Sci-Fi - Hermione Granger and Finn from Star Wars uncover a nefarious plot at a big tech company. Stars Emma Watson, Tom Hanks and John Boyega. 110 min.

SNATCHED - R - Action/Comedy - After a woman is dumped, she convinces her cautious mother to go on vacation with her. Stars Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn. 90 min.

LAST CHANCE THE BOSS BABY - PG - Animation/Family A baby and his seven-year-old brother seek to thwart the evil CEO of Puppy Co. Voices by Alec Baldwin and Steve Buscemi. 97 min. CAN’T HELP FALLING IN LOVE - NR - Romance - A woman gets engaged, then finds out she’s already married. 119 min.

THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS - PG13 - Action/ Crime - A beautiful woman seduces Dom (Vin Diesel) and he finds himself involved in terrorism. Also stars Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham. 136 min.

COLOSSAL - R - Action/Comedy - Anne Hathaway is an unemployed party girl who realizes she’s connected to a massive creature destroying Seoul. 109 min.

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 2 - PG13 - Action/Sci-Fi - The team’s adventures continue as they learn about Peter Quill’s true parentage. 136 min.

GIFTED - PG13 - Drama - A single guy tries to raise his child prodigy niece. Stars Chris Evans and Mckenna Grace. 101 min.

KING ARTHUR: LEGEND OF THE SWORD PG13 - Action/Adventure - Yet another remake of the legend of King Arthur, his sword Excalibur, etc. Stars a bunch of pasty white guys. 126 min.

HOW TO BE A LATIN LOVER - PG13 - Comedy - A sleazy guy who preyed on rich older women gets dumped and has to move in with his sister. Stars Eugenio Derbez and Salma Hayek. 115 min.

THE LOST CITY OF Z - PG13 - Action/Adventure - A British explorer vanishes in the Amazon in the 1920s while searching for a lost city. Based on a true story. 141 min.

SMURFS: LOST VILLAGE - PG - Animation/ Adventure - Smurfette and her friends stumble on the biggest secret in Smurf history. 89 min.

Film, TV & Concert Comedian

Nick Swardson

TONIGHT 7:30 pm Castle A MACC Starry Night Cinema

Finding Dory

FRI May 19 7:30/Gates 6pm FREE ADMISSION! Amphitheater An Evening of Music & 3D Film

Tibetan Illusion Destroyer & Pianist Sarah Cahill

SAT May 20 7:30 pm Castle Award-Winning Reggae Group

Tribal Seeds

SUN May 21 Pavilion 7:00 pm / Gates @ 6:00 pm GALLERY

Opens This Sunday! May 21 to July 16

Piero Resta: Illuminatus Open Tue- Sun 10-5 FREE ADMISSION

MAY 18, 2017 21

Calendar

by Alex Mitchell & Shannon Kekahuna

Da Kine Calendar BIG SHOWS

Week menus for lunch or dinner, with a portion of proceeds to benefit Aloha Backpack Buddies. Participating restaurants include: The Banyan Tree Restaurant, Burger Shack Kapalua, Cane and Canoe, Hana Hou Bar, Kai Sushi, Pineapple Grill, Taverna, The Plantation House Restaurant, Sansei Seafood Restaurant and The Wine Palette. 8am. Kapaluarestaurantweek.com

PAT SIMMONS JR. - Thu. May 18. Enjoy a blend of Hawaiian-inspired acoustic folk music live with Pat at Mulligan’s. 6:30pm. Mulligan’s on the Blue, (100 Kaukahi St., Wailea); 808-874-1131; Mulligansontheblue.com

COMEDY AND MAGIC WITH HOLDEN MOWAT - Sat. May 20. Join Maui Magician Holden Mowat with his interactive, all-ages magic-comedy performance on the mall’s center stage. 11:30am. Lahaina Cannery Mall, (1221 Honoapi‘ilani Hwy., Lahaina); 808-661-5304; Lahainacannerymall.com

SOUL KITCHEN AT MULLIGAN’S - Fri. May 19. Join Soul Kitchen at Mulligan’s for a special onetime-only show this month. They will not be playing on every third Friday of the month, but they will have their signature “Voodoo Workin’ Dancing,” great music, food and cocktails. 7pm. Mulligan’s on the Blue, (100 Kaukahi St., Wailea); 808-874-1131; Mulligansontheblue.com

SIT YOUR NUGGETS DOWN - Sat. May 20. Sit your nuggets down at the Temple of Peace for some Haiku hilarity! Free Range Comedy brings the funny with their fast-paced comedy improv show. $2 off if you check in on Yelp or bring a can of food for the Maui Food Bank. $10. 7:30pm. Temple of Peace Maui, (575 Haiku Rd.); 808-575-5220; Mauifreerangecomedy.com

TRIBAL SEEDS - Sun. May 21. The reggae group will return to Maui as part of their spiritually driven Cali roots reggae music. They will be accompanied by Mike Love. $32-40. 7pm Maui Arts & Cultural Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org

MAGIC ON MAUI WITH ITH H SETH GRAKING’S VISIT WINE TASTdnessdays. ING AND TOUR - Thu. May BEL - Sundays and Wednesdays. ar 18 America’s Got Talent star 18. Maui’s only winery is n Seth Grabel is on Maui. now offering the King’s V Grabel is a magician, ilVisit Wine Tasting and lusionist and headlining Tour. This is a great entertainer. Direct from opportunity for wine Las Vegas, he brings to lovers, and for those Maui a hilariously skillful who want to learn more show that is fun for all about grape production UT O CK ages. Tickets start at $49 on Maui. $50. 3:30pm. CHE EEK M for adults and $24.50 for MauiWine, Ulupalakua AN W C THE V children under 12. Special Vineyards, (14815 Pi‘ilani YOU . OF S kHw VIP meet-and-greet packHwy., Ulupalakua); 808K E 17 G IC A P P oup 878ages, Kama‘aina and group 878-6058; Mauiwine.com ON rates are available. 5pm. Maui KAPAL KAPALUA SUNSET DINahaina); Theatre, (878 Front St., Lahaina); NER - Tues Tuesday-Saturday. Sit back, re com 808-856-7900; Mauitheatre.com relax and take in the beautiful Maui sun‘AN EVENING WITH ALBERT EINSTEIN’ - Sun. set while enjoying a special three-course SunMay 21. Rick Scheideman will perform his one-man set Menu which includes a glass of sparkling show at the Pioneer Inn courtyard. Enjoy a prewine and an amuse bouche from the Chef. $50. show dinner and happy hour from 3-6pm. Drinks 5:30pm. Banyan Tree Restaurant at The Ritz-Carlare available for purchase throughout the show. ton, (1 Ritz-Carlton Dr., Kapalua); 808-665-7096; Reservations recommended. $22. 6pm. Pioneer Ritzcarlton.com/banyantree Inn, (658 Wharf St., Lahaina); 303-507-0987; CASTAWAY’S SEAFOOD NIGHT - Fri. May Rickscheideman.com 19. Enjoy a seafood extravaganza with fresh fish, FOUREVER FAB SHOW MAUI, THE BEATLES clams, shrimp, crab leg cluster, Portuguese sauTRIBUTE - Wed. May 24. Fourever Fab and its sage, new potatoes, corn on the cob and garlic founding members have been performing the hits bread. $47.95. 5pm. Castaway Cafe, (45 Kai Ala of the world’s most-loved lads, The Beatles, for Dr., Lahaina); 808-661-9091; CastawayCafe.com over 20 years. They continue to perfect their perSTATEWIDE FARM DAY WITH EDIBLE formance with sound-alike vocals and the original HAWAIIAN ISLANDS - Sat. May 20. They’re instruments to pay tribute to the songs that defined heading out to meet growers and you’re invited. a generation. Tickets start at $59.99 for adults and Visit a farm, take a farm tour with your family $29.99 for children (age 5 through 11). 10 percent or shop at a farmers market. Share your experidiscount for Kama‘aina with Hawaii ID. 6:30pm. ence on social media using the hashtag #EHIFourever Fab Show at Maui Theatre, (878 Front St., FarmDay17. 8am. Various Maui Farms & VenLahaina); 808-365-7535; Foureverfabshow.com ues; Ediblehi.com/2017-hawaii-farm-guide GEORGE KAHUMOKU JR.’S SLACK KEY SUNDAY BRUNCH AND BLOODY MARY SHOW - Wed. May 24. See Grammy-winner BAR - Sun. May 21. Featuring an enhanced a la George Kahumoku Jr., performing in concert with carte breakfast menu created by Chef David ViMaster of Hawaii’s Music at the resorts Aloha Paviano, a celebration of savory and sweet culinary vilion. Pre-show dinner package also available for delights. 10am. Cane and Canoe at Montage Sea House Restaurant, advance purchase required Kapalua, (1 Bay Dr., Kapalua); 808-662-6681; call or go online. $37.99. 7:30pm. Slack Key Show Caneandcanoe.com at Napili Kai Beach Resort, (5900 L. Honoapi‘ilani Rd., Napili); 808-669-3858; Slackkeyshow.com WINE SOCIAL - Sundays and Mondays. Join in an intimate wine and food pairing with restaurant and wine list manager Jim Hansen. His thoughtful selections will be paired with light bites. 4:30pm. MAUI TASTEMAKERS SERIES - Until- Fri. May Pulehu, an Italian Grill at Westin Ka‘anapali Re26. Join Japengo every Friday in May, experience sort, (6 Kai Ala Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-667-3254; the flavors and taste the freshness of Ocean OrPulehurestaurantmaui.com ganic Vodka. Enjoy handcrafted cocktails featuring KO’S SUNDAY NIGHT LAULAU - Sun. May 21. the crisp, natural and clean vodka distilled here on Enjoy Chef Tylun Pang’s healthy and modern take Maui, using deep ocean mineral water and organic on a traditional Hawaiian dish, the special seafood cane sugar. This three-course pre-fixe menu will laulau includes Maui fresh catch fish, shrimp, scalcomprise of three hand-crafted cocktails paired lops, spinach, mushrooms and baby bok choy, all with dishes from Chef de Cuisine Gevin Utrillo and wrapped in ti leaf, steamed, and served with jasmine Sushi Chef Jin Hosono. 5:30pm. Japengo at Hyatt rice. 5pm. Ko at Fairmont Kea Lani, (4100 Wailea Regency Maui, (200 Nohea Kai Dr., Ka‘anapali); Alanui Dr.); 808-875-2210; Korestaurant.com 808-667-4727; Japengomaui.com CASTAWAY’S DATE NIGHT - Wed. May 24. A KAPALUA RESTAURANT WEEK - Until - Sun. perfect destination to bring your sweetheart with May 21. Choose from special Kapalua Restaurant ocean front dining and couple specials. Enjoy en-

UNDERGROUND DANCE PARTY - Sun. May 21. What? A dance party in Kihei and guest DJs mixed it up at Ambrosia, hit this spot up and boogie the night away. 10pm. Ambrosia Martini Lounge, (1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-891-1011; Ambrosiamaui.com

STAGE SHOWS WARREN AND ANNABELLE’S MAGIC SHOW - Mon-Sat. Warren Gibson, one of the country’s premier sleight-of-hand magicians, treats you to the best “close-up” magic and comedy in a beautiful 78-seat venue! Annabelle, their resident ghost, will entertain you while you dine, enjoy cocktails, appetizers and yummy desserts. $64-104.50. 5pm. Warren and Annabelle’s, (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-6244; Warrenandannabelles.com ‘ULALENA - Mon, Tue, Thur, Fri. Delight in the richness of Hawaiian history and culture through authentic Hawaiian music, dance and over 100 instruments played live in a dynamic, colorful, emotional, and entertaining theatrical performance. Embark on this powerful journey, and leave with a deeper understanding of the island’s culture, and the true essence of aloha. $29.99 Keiki / $59.99 Adults. Children 5 and under are free. Kama‘aina and military rates, and dinner partner offers are available. 5pm. Maui Theatre, (878 Front St., Lahaina); 808-856-7900; Mauitheatre.com NA LIO DINNER - Thu. May 18. Sit back and enjoy the story of the horse in Hawaii and discover how the Hawaiian Cowboys, and the horse became a part of Hawaiian culture. Check-in at the shop and the shuttle will transport you to Kahalawai Farms and Stables for the dinner and show. The menu will be seasonal and prepared on location by Kalei’s Food Truck and Catering. Visit with miniature horses Julio and Freedom, take pictures and meet the horses and cast of Na Lio. BYOB. $99. 5:30pm. Na Lio Gift Shop, (335 Keawe St., Lahaina); 808-270-2255; Naliomaui.com ‘BURN’N LOVE’ - Mon, Tue, Thur, Fri. Maui Theatre’s Burn’n Love brings back the golden era of Elvis in Hawaii. Starring Darren Lee, relive the days of Blue Hawaii with one of the best Elvis impersonators in the world. $60 - $110. 7:30pm. Maui Theatre, (878 Front St., Lahaina); 808-856-7900; Mauitheatre.com SIDE SHOWS: A FESTIVAL OF ONE-ACT PLAYS - Fri. May 19 & Sat. May 20. Check out a collection of one-act plays presented by members of the Maui acting community. One weekend only. Admission is free or by donation. 7pm. ‘A‘ali‘ikuhonua Creative Arts Center at Seabury Hall, (480 Olinda Rd., Makawao); 808-572-7235; Seaburyhall.org

22 MAY 18, 2017

KING’S COTTAGE TASTING ROOM - Thu. May 18. Built for King Kalakaua in 1856, the King’s Cottage is where you can taste complimentary MauiWine varieties, also offering free historical and cellar tours. 10am. MauiWine, Ulupalakua Vineyards, (14815 Pi‘ilani Hwy., Ulupalakua); 808-878-6058; Mauiwine.com

'T N O ! D T E G FOR

MAUI FOODIE

trees, house or Caesar salad and a bottle of wine for $49.95 per couple. 5pm. Castaway Cafe, (45 Kai Ala Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-661-9091; CastawayCafe.com LUAU DINNER SHOW - Wed. May 24. The luau dinner show Huaka‘i–Journey through Polynesia includes traditional games, woodcarvers, cultural demonstrations and a fantastic buffet. There will be beautiful hula performances and the fire knife dance finale. 5:30pm. Ka‘anapali Beach Club Luau, (104 Ka‘anapali Shores); 888-582-8858; Huakailuau.com

ART SCENE CALL TO ARTISTS: SCHAEFER PORTRAIT CHALLENGE 2018 (SPC2018) - Until - Sat. Sep 23. Artists interested in participating in SPC 2018 may submit their work on Sep. 23, 2017, 9am-noon. The Challenge is open to artists 18+ who are Hawaii residents. Exhibition dates will be Jan. 16 to Mar. 18, 2018. 9am. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org WWII POP-UP DISPLAY - Until - Fri. May 26. During World War II, approximately 33,000 Japanese-Americans served in the US Armed Forces. These brave men volunteered to serve their country, even as the country questioned their loyalty. The display will feature WWII vignettes ranging from the music of the Nisei soldiers, to personal memorabilia from the collections of Pfc. Susumu Fukuyoshi of the 100th Infantry Battalion and Pfc. Hiroichi Tomita of the 442nd Regimental Combat Team. 12pm. Nisei Veterans Memorial Center, (665 Kahului Beach Rd.); 808-244-6862; Nvmc.org ‘I AM MUSIC’ CELTIC TRIBUTE TO MUSIC AND MUSICIANS ON CANVAS - Until - Thu. Jun 15. Longtime West Maui resident, music promoter and Maui Celtic Radio announcer Hamish Burgess honors all music and musicians with his new art exhibit. Original paintings, giclee and art prints are available for purchase. 5:30am. Hawaiian Village Coffee, (4405 Honoapi‘ilani Hwy., Kahana) BETH COOPER - Until - Mon. Jun 5. Beth Cooper has been working on linoleum cut prints and will be showing her latest pieces. Come see her new linoleum cut art work at the Old Jail Gallery. 10am. Lahaina Arts Society, (648 Wharf St., Lahaina); 808-661-0111; Lahainaarts.com STEVE RINALDI - Until- Tue. May 30. Steve Rinaldi’s portraits reveal the essence of an individual and his landscapes inspire a sense of light and awe. Watch him paint in person every Tuesday in May. 11am. Maui Hands Paia, (84 Hana Hwy., Paia); 808-579-9245; Mauihands.com WOOD CARVED TIKIS BY FOLAU TUPOU - Until - Mon. May 29. At the age of 15, Folau Tupou began carving and studying the history of the Hawaiian gods. His carvings are in public and private collections worldwide. He will be in the gallery Mondays in May, from 1-4pm and on Friday, May 19 from 4-8pm. 1pm. Maui Hands Makawao, (1169 Makawao Ave.); 808-572-2008; Mauihands.com KAREN SCARBOROUGH - Until- Mon. Jun 5. Karen Scarborough’s vibrant oil painting exhibition will reflect the unchanging beauty of Maui and the end of the sugar cane era in Hawaii. All of her works have been done “plein air.” Her exhibit will be on display in the Banyan Tree Gallery. 1pm. Lahaina Arts Society, (648 Wharf St., Lahaina); 808-661-0111; Lahainaarts.com CAFE FRIDAY, LIVE ART AND MUSIC - Fri. May 19. Friday evenings at the cafe are bustling with published local artists creating amazing art along with live music from professional musicians and recording artists. Couple that with a local’s fa-

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AMBROSIA 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-1011

Official 3rd Friday’s Afterparty w/ The Heartifact, 9:30pm $10

Remix the Earth w/ Olivia Foxglove & Boogiemeister 9:30pm, $10

Mark Johnstone & Friends, 6:30pm, no cover

90s Night w/ DJ Blast, 10pm, $10

No Music- Saloon is Open! Just GOOD Fun

Brunch & Bloody Mary Bar 7am

MON- Live Band & Open Mic 7-10pm, TUE- Pat Simmons Jr., 6:30pm, WED- Randall Rospond, 6:30pm

Will Hartzog 7:30pm-10pm; no cover

Johnny Ringo 7:30-10pm; no cover

Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Justin Phillips 7-9pm; no cover

MON-Garrett Probst 7:30pm, TUE- Jazz at the Cat 7:30pm WED- Benny Uyetake 7pm

SIN

House Music

DJ $ Mike, 10pm

Gina Martinelli Band, 6pm

MON- Corona Day, TUE & WED Pool League

1188 Makawao Ave. - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

COOL CAT CAFE Wharf Cinema Center, 658 Front St #160, Lahaina - 667-0988

DIAMOND'S ICE BAR 1279 S. Kihei Rd. - 874-9299

DIRTY MONKEY 844 Front St., Lahaina - 419-6286

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

DOWN THE HATCH 658 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4900

FLEETWOOD’S ON FRONT ST. 744 Front St. (Rooftop), Lahaina - 669-6425

vorite hangout along with a selection of high-quality teas and coffees, healthy smoothies and snacks– and you have a great way to wind-down after a long week. 5:30pm. Cafe Cafe Maui, (129 Lahainaluna Rd.); 808-283-2739; Cafecafemaui.com FRIDAY NIGHT ART NIGHT - Fri. May 19. Visit the gallery for live music and Mai Tais while they showcase a new artist of the week. Free. 6pm. Lahaina Printsellers Ltd., (764 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-5815; Printsellers.com BOOTZIE GALLERY GRAND OPENING PARTY - Sat. May 20. Art, live music, food and drinks. Gallery owner Bootzie Alexandra has launched into her next creative exploration with co-curator/ artist James Freeborne Welch. The gallery features a collection of contemporary original artworks, sculpture, designer jewelry, cathedral crystals and a hip designer boutique section. 6pm-9pm. Enchantress Gallery by Bootzie at Shops of Wailea, (3750 Wailea Alanui); 808-250-6521; Hermineharman.com

POLITICAL EVENTS MAUI THROWDOWN THURSDAY RALLIES Thu. May 18. Everyone is invited to come out and bring a sign reflecting why you march and make your voices heard. Join in the call for greater attention to human rights everywhere. 4pm. University of Hawaii Maui College, (310 Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-984-3500; Maui.hawaii.edu BLOSSOMS FOR THE BRAVE LEI-MAKING EVENT - Fri. May 26. The free event, co-hosted by Kaunoa Senior Services, the Dept. of Housing and Human Concerns and the Office of Mayor Alan Arakawa, is intended to gather the community to make a total of more than 2,846 lei. The lei will be placed on veterans’ graves on Memorial Day at Maui Veterans Cemetery in Makawao. There’ll also be live music with Kevin Kanemoto & Friends and Emcee Kathy Collins. Free. 9am. Maui County Building, (200 S. High St., Wailuku); Co.maui.hi.us LET’S SUPPORT OUR U.S. MILITARY TOGETHER MONTH & ARMED FORCES DAY - Sat. May 20. Members of the military and veteran organizations will be on hand for outreach and education. The festivities will include entertainment, crafts and balloons for the keiki. 10am-2pm. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center, (275 W. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-4325; Queenkaahumanucenter.com

MON- Movies & Martinis 7:30 & 9:30pm, TUE-Latin Nights w/salsa music & dancing, 10pm, WED- TBA

Saturday Sessions w/ DJ Blast, 10pm

CASANOVA CHARLEY’S

DJ Kurt’s Underground Dance Party ($1 cover goes to charity),10pm

Frisky Friday w/ DJ Skinny Guy, 10pm

DJ Decka, 10pm

DJ Gary Oneal 9pm-close

WED- Ladies Night 2.0 w/ Residents DJ Kid Continental, 10pm $10

WED- SIN w/ DJ Andrew, 10pm

DJ Illz, 9pm-close

Trivia Night 7pm

TBA

Service Industry Night, 10pm

Fresh Squeezed Friday, 6pm

House Shakers w/ Fulton Tashombe & Rock Hendricks, 7-10pm

TICKETS ON SALE MARIA MULDAUR AND HER RED HOT BLUESIANA BAND - Thu. May 25. Enjoy American roots music, blues, jazz, swamp funk and gospel in what Muldaur calls “Bluesiana Music.” Maria is on tour in support of her latest release on Stoney Plain Records Steady Love. 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, (1 Cameron Way, Kahului); 808-242-SHOW; Mauiarts.org 2017 EAST MEETS WEST FESTIVAL - Fri. May 26 - Sat. May 27. The show will feature an exciting lineup of professional jazz fusion and multi-cultural dance artists. Headlining the concerts on both nights will be Ictus, an instrumental jazz fusion ensemble composed of veteran musicians from Spokane, Washington (and faculty from Gonzaga University). Now in its second year, the East Meets West Festival encourages cross-cultural dance and musical collaborations to attract a worldwide range of performers to Maui. $15-25. 6:30pm. Iao Theater, (68 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-242-6969; Mauionstage.com FOOD FOR THOUGHT CONCERT - Fri. Jun 2. The nonprofit organization Tempo of the Heart will present a rock-and-roll benefit concert to support the Hawaii Farmers Union United (HFUU). An impressive lineup of local and internationallyacclaimed artists will perform including Kanekoa, The Deborah Vial Band, Pat Simmons, Jr. and Steven Von Linne. Tempo of the Heart will donate its proceeds from ‘Food for Thought’ to HFUU, with a portion also given to local broadcaster Mana‘o Radio. 7pm. Iao Theater, (68 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-242-6969; Mauionstage.com BIG ISLAND JAZZ AND BLUES FESTIVAL Sat. Jun 3. Grammy winners and jazz and blues legends will come together for this remarkable annual Jazz and Blues Festival. The event will feature Russell Malone, Eric Marienthal, Bobby Watson, Pamela Baskin-Watson, Wayne Troups, Benny Uyetake, Rock Hendricks, Gary Washburn, The Honoka‘a Select Jazz Band and The Iguanas from New Orleans. $50-100. 5pm. Maunakea Beach Hotel, (62-100 Mauna Kea Beach Dr., Waimea); 866-774-6236; Bigislandjazzandbluesfestival.com KAPALUA WINE AND FOOD FESTIVAL - Thu. Jun 8 - Sun. Jun 11. This annual event brings together oenophiles, gourmands and enthusiasts of the good life to celebrate, learn and experience the finest culinary trends and vini-

TBA

MON- MA’s Mix 10pm, TUE- Ladies Night 10pm, WED- TBA

Trivia Night, 10pm

MON-Magic Monday 10pm, TUE- $5 Tuesdays, WED Wahine Wednesday Ladies Night, 10pm

The Maui Boys, 7-10pm

MON- HI Black & Gold 7-10pm, TUE & WED- Paul West

TBA

House Shakers w/ Fulton Tashombe & Rock Hendricks, 7-10pm

culture. They have invited top winemakers and chefs from throughout the globe, and here on Maui, to feature their most revered vintages and dishes and share their love for food and wine. 10:30am. Kapalua Wine and Food Festival, (Kapalua); Kapaluawineandfoodfestival.com

CALENDAR OF EVENTS THURSDAY, MAY 18 GROOVE TO MOOVE - Thu. May 18. QKC, Meadow Gold Dairies and Hui No Ke Ola Pono presents Groove To Moove. Bring your walking shoes and get “moving” together toward a healthier community. 10am. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center, (275 W. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-4325; Queenkaahumanucenter.com TAI CHI - Thu. May 18. Southern Praying Mantis present tai chi demonstration and class with Master Sifu David Morane. All ages welcome. Free. 10am. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center, (275 W. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-4325; Queenkaahumanucenter.com BEING MORTAL - Medicine and What Matters in the End - Thu. May 18. Hospice Maui invites the community to join us for a screening and discussion of the PBS Frontline documentary Being Mortal. Free. 4pm. Hospice Maui Hale, (400 Mahalani St., Wailuku); 808-244-5555; Hospicemaui.org GUEST SPEAKER FROM CENTRAL PACIFIC HURRICANE CENTER - Thu. May 18. The WMTA is working with the Maui Emergency Management Agency, The Pacific Disaster Center and the State Emergency Management Agency on developing a customized disaster plan designed to meet West Maui’s specific needs. The isolation from the Island’s major hospital and airport, due to frequent road closures, fires and flooding, have highlighted the need for special preparedness planning. Free. 5:30pm. Lahaina Civic Center, (1840 Honoapi‘ilani Hwy., Lahaina)

FRIDAY, MAY 19 PAU HANA AND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT - Fri. May 19. Pau Hana celebrates the end of the work week with live musical performances by Maui’s talented up and coming artists as well as Maui’s more well established musicians. 4pm. The Shops at Wailea, (3750 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-891-6770; Theshopsatwailea.com

LET’S KOKUA TOGETHER - Fri. May 19. All nonprofit organizations looking to host an education or fundraiser event. 5pm. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center, (275 W. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-4325; Queenkaahumanucenter.com HOLIDAY AND COMPANY IS CELEBRATING AT MAKAWAO THIRD FRIDAY - Fri. May 19. They will be selling Moroccan rugs, expanding their sale room and throwing a party. Isabelle has just returned from Jazz Fest in New Orleans and is ready to bring some of the fun home to Makawao. Come and celebrate! 5pm-8pm. Holiday & Co., (3681 Baldwin Ave., Makawao); 808-572-1470; Holidayandcomaui.com KAMA‘AINA NIGHTS - Fri. May 19. The Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center and KPOA presents a locally grown Hawaiian concert series for the entire ohana, with Sista Val. 7pm. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center, (275 W. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-877-4325; Queenkaahumanucenter.com

SATURDAY, MAY 20 E-CYCLING - Sat. May 20. Items accepted at the E-Cycling program include computers, televisions, microwaves, cell phones, stereos, copiers, fax machines and other items with circuit boards. The service is provided free of charge; the public is asked to be courteous by not leaving any items at the gate after hours. 8am. E-Cycling Program, (901 L. Main St., Wailuku); 808-264-6460; Mauicounty.gov/recycle EXPLORE SCIENCE: EARTH AND SPACE AT KIHEI PUBLIC LIBRARY - Sat. May 20. The Kihei Public Library welcomes youngsters ages 7 and up explore. Maui Science and Discovery Center will bring hands-on activities and introduce the fields of heliophysics, Earth science, planetary science and astrophysics.Free. 10:30am. Kihei Public Library, (35 Waimahaihai St., Kihei); 808-875-6833; LibrariesHawaii.org WEST AFRICAN DANCE WITH QUINCEY - Sat. May 20. Live drumming! Have fun following the beats of the drums, learn new steps and moves with this great teacher. $10. 1am. Pahu Creations, (870 Hali‘imaile Rd., Makawao); 808-385-2642; Pahumaui.com KEIKI HULA SHOW - Sat. May 20. Enjoy a true Hawaiian hula show from various hula halau, such as Te Tiare Patitifa, Na Kamali‘i Nani O Lahaina, Halau Hula O Keola Al‘‘iokekai and Hui Lanakila. 1pm. Lahaina Cannery Mall, (1221 Honoapi‘ilani Hwy., Lahaina); 808-661-5304; Lahainacannerymall.com

MAY 18, 2017 23

WILD WAHINE WEDNESDAY

CASANOVA’S FAMOUS LADIES NIGHT RESIDENT DJ KID CONTINENTAL MUSIC STARTS @ 10PM

$10 COVER

THE EVENING THAT EARNED CASANOVA’S THE AWARDS

“BEST LATE NIGHT IN MAUI” “BEST SINGLES SCENE IN MAUI”

FRIDAY MAY 19TH THE OFFICIAL ‘AFTER THIRD FRIDAY’ PARTY

THE HEARTIFACT

SHOW STARTS AT 9:30PM $10 COVER

SOULFUL HIP HOP WITH FUNKY ISLAND TWIST

BRI SUMMERS & ROB RECKER A SONIC SHAMANIC COLLABORATION SATURDAY MAY 20TH BEATS BAZAAR PRESENTS A CUBA FUNDRAISER

REMIX THE EARTH

SHOW STARTS AT 9:30PM $10 COVER

HOUSE, GLOBAL BEATS ‘N TROPICAL, BASS

OLIVIA FOXGLOVE, BOOGIEMEISTER LIVE PERCUSSIONS BY BRANDON LUND MAKE IT A MEMORABLE EVENING DINE & DANCE AT CASANOVA FOR DINNER RESERVATIONS | 808.572.0220 | CASANOVAMAUI.COM

24 MAY 18, 2017

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HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-8010

JAVA JAZZ 3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. - 667-0787

KIMO’S 845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

Karaoke, 9pm-close

Dat Guyz, 9pm-close

Island Reggae, 9pm-close

Karaoke Industry Night, 8pm-close

MON- Karaoke 8pm, TUE- Karaoke & $1 Tacos, WED- Open Mic 9pm

Rick Glencross

Guest Musician

Rick Glencross

John Bowser

MON- Mel & Soundlab, TUE- Nino Tascano & Paul Bunuan, WED- Guest Musician

Ma’a 6:30pm-8:30pm

Crazy Fingers, 8-10pm

Ma’a 6:30-8:30pm

Benny & Rock 6-8pm

MON- Benny & Rock 6-8pm, TUE & WED- Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm

Karaoke w/ “Auntie” Toddy Lilikoi, 9:30pm; no cover

Jim Spector, 5:30pm

TBA

Neto, 5:30pm

Island Soul, 5:30pm

TUE- Tantalizing Tues w/Gina Martinelli & Friends 5-8pm, WED-Jim Spector, 5:30pm

Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30pm; no cover

David Wolf 5:30-8:30pm; no cover

MON - David Wolf / TUE - The Benoits WED - Ranga Pae (all 5:30-8:30pm)

Pat Simmon’s Jr., 6:30pm-8:30pm

Soul Kitchen, 7-9pm (eevry 3rd Friday)

Makai Jazz, 6:30-8pm

Celtic Tigers, 7-9pm

MON-WED TBA

Throwback Thursday w/ DJ, 10pm

Hot Friday’s w/ Big Mike & Kamikaze, 10pm

Euphoria w/ DJ Big Mike, 10pm

Video Mix, 10pm

MON-Free Pool all day, TUE- SIN 10pm, WED- Wild Wednesday w/ DJ 10pm

Thirsty Thursdays & Free Pool

Karaoke w/ Brant Quick & prizes 7-11pm

Ladies Night w/ specials 9pm

Dart Tournament, NBA & NHL

MON- NBA & NHL, darts & pool, TUE- $2 Taco Tuesdays, WED- Specials & 9-ball Tournament

KOBE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St. (Lounge Area), Lahaina - 667-5555

KONO’S ON THE GREEN 470 Lipoa Pkwy, Kihei - 633-4220

MERRIMAN’S 1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua - 669-6400

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

PARADISE GRILL

2291 Kaanapali Pkwy, Lahaina - 662-3700

PLAYMAKERS SPORTS BAR 928 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4084

FRIENDS OF HOT RODS AND CLASSIC CARS Sat. May 20. View Maui’s hottest hot rods and classic cars in the north parking lot. 5pm. Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center, (275 W. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808877-4325; Queenkaahumanucenter.com ECO FARM TOURS - Sat. May 20. Join in an educational tour of permaculture design features. $20-25. 4pm. Ahimsa Sanctuary Farm, (4505 Hana Hwy., Haiku); 808-283-8057; Ahimsasanctuaryfarm.com

SUNDAY, MAY 21 FREE ZUMBA - Sun. May 21. Get your sweat on with Keoni’s Hot Lava DanceFit. Every class is a party and every body is welcome. Free. 8:30am. Keoni’s Hot Lava DanceFit at Outlets of Maui, (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-344-7122; Hotlavadancefit.com FREE ZUMBA - Sun. May 21. Get your sweat on with Keoni’s Hot Lava DanceFit. Free. 9am. Keoni’s Hot Lava DanceFit at Maui Mall, (70 E. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-344-7122; Hotlavadancefit.com HA‘A HEO O MAUI - Sun. May 21. Enjoy a traditional Hawaiian hula performance by Ha‘a Heo o Maui on the mall’s center stage. 11am. Maui Mall, (70 E. Ka‘ahumanu Ave., Kahului); 808-871-1307; Mauimall.com

MONDAY, MAY 22 MAUI MAUKA CONSERVATION AWARENESS TRAINING - Mon. May 22. This three-hour training seeks to connect tourism professionals with conservation professionals. Learn about Maui’s unique natural environment, including the forests of Haleakala, native forest birds, unique plants and how Maui is addressing invasive species concerns. Free. 1pm. Pacific Whale Foundation, (Ma‘alaea Harbor Shops); 808-249-8811; Pacificwhale.org; Mauimauka.org SALSA DANCE CLASS - Mon. May 22. Maui dance enthusiasts and Latin music lovers can take Salsa Dance Classes with Demian and Lasensua, singles and couple welcome. Beginners class starts at 6pm with Intermediate class to follow at 6:45pm. $10 per class, $15 per couple. 6pm. Makawao Union Church, (1445 Baldwin Ave., Makawao); 808-579-9261; Makawaounionchurch.org ILLEGAL SAND MINING COMMUNITY MEETING - Mon. May 22. The meeting will include a discussion on sand mining and the neglect of Iwi Kupuna. Free. 7pm. Paukukalo Hawaiian Homestead Community Center, (657 Kaumuali‘i St,, Waiehu); 808-281-4344.

TUESDAY, MAY 23 E-CYCLING - Tue. May 23. Items accepted at the

E-Cycling program include computers, televisions, microwaves, cell phones, stereos, copiers, fax machines and other items with circuit boards. The service is provided free of charge; the public is asked to be courteous by not leaving any items at the gate after hours. 1pm. E-Cycling Program, (901 L. Main y St., Wailuku); 808-264-6460;; Mauicounty. gov/recycle UCK K HFUU HALEAKALA POTLUCK 3. & MEETING - Tue. May 23. The HFUU-Education com-mittee will host a lively and positive break-out session led by our chapter leaders and food safety professionals. These food safety experts are familiar with the topic of food safety, and will help us implement preventative solutions in support of e our family farmers and locavore consumers. Help out with your g dish special creative and nourishing (for eight or more). Those who come t d without a dish will be asked ffor a suggested donation of $10 Members, $12 Non-Members. 5:30pm. Haiku Community Center, (Pilialoha St., Haiku); Huff.org

LIVE MUSIC WEST MAUI AUNTIE’S KITCHEN AT WESTIN KA‘ANAPALI RESORT - Fri, Live Music 4-7pm; Mon, Live Music 4-7pm; (6 Kai Ala Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-667Westin 3254; Westinkaanapali.com/dining

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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SUPPORT GROUPS Tue. May 23. Child and Family Service in Wailuku offers weekly domestic violence support groups for survivors, teens and children every Tuesday. Call for more information and/or to register. (Registration is required). 5:30pm. Child and Family Service, (392 N. Market St., Wailuku); 808-8776888; Childandfamilyservices.org

WEDNESDAY, MAY 24 DISCOVERING THE CLASSICS WITH PAPA LOPAKA - Wed. May 24. Papa Lopaka (Robert Devinck) will give a dramatic reading of the Classics Illustrated comic book of The Adventures of Marco Polo, projected on a large screen. Following the reading, Papa will encourage children to read the original book. Best suited for ages 7 and up. 3pm. Kihei Public Library, (35 Waimahaihai St., Kihei); 808-875-6833; LibrariesHawaii.org OUTLETS OUTDOOR MARKET - Wed. May 24. The Market will feature chef demonstrations, live music, hula show and cultural activities. Maui farmers and artisans will feature locally-grown produce, handmade goods, creative crafts, apparel, island artwork and more. The Outlets retailers will also host a sidewalk sale with special sales and promotions. 4pm. Outlets of Maui, (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-8277; Outletsofmaui.com

A CANE AND CANOE AT MONTAGE KAPALUA - Thu, Piilani Arias 5:30-8:30pm; Fri, Ka Kapali Keahi 5:30-8:30pm; S Daniel Querubin and Sat, D Dayan Kai 5:30-9pm; Sun, Gary Larson Duo 9am-12pm; Sun, Joseph Chee 5:30-8:30pm; Mon, Kincaid Kipahu 5:308 8:30pm; Tue, Brian Haia 5 5:30-8:30pm; Wed, Kalani Sm Smythe 5:30-8:30pm; (1 Bay Dr., Kapalua); 808-6626681; Caneandcanoe.com

CAPTAIN JJACK’S ISLAND GRILL Th Johnny J h Ri - Thu, Ringo 2-5pm; Fri, Will Hartzog 2-4:30pm; Fri, Will Hartzog 2-4:30pm; Mon, Will Hartzog 2-4:30pm; Mon, Will Hartzog 2-4:30pm; Tue, Johnny Ringo 2-5pm; Wed, Tori Dixon Band 2-5pm; (672 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0988; CaptainJacksMaui.com CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE - Thu, Scott Freeman 4:30-7:30pm; Thu, Harry Troupe 8-11pm; Fri, Joe Benedet 4:30-7:30pm; Fri, Harry Troupe 8-11pm; Sat, Scot Freeman 4:30-7:30pm; Sat, Brooks Maguire 8-11pm; Sun, Joe Benedet 4:307:30pm; Sun, Scot Freeman 8-11pm; Mon, Mark Burnett 4:30-7:30pm; Mon, Evan Shulman 8-11pm; Tue, Scott Freeman 4:30-7:30pm; Tue, Brooks Maguire 8-11pm; Wed, Brooks Maguire 4:30-7:30pm; Wed, Harry Troupe 8-11pm; (811 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-4855; Cheeseburgerland.com CLIFF DIVE GRILL AT SHERATON MAUI - Thu-Wed, Local Live Entertainment 6-8pm; (2605 Ka‘anapali Pkwy.); 808-661-0031; Cliffdivegrillmaui.com COOL CAT CAFE - Thu, Will Hartzog 7:30-10pm; Fri, Johnny Ringo 7:30-10pm; Sat, Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; Sun, Justin Phillips 7-9pm; Mon, Garrett Probst 7:30-10pm; Tue, Jazz at the Cat 7:30-10pm; Wed, Benny Uyetake 7:30-10pm; (658 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0908; Coolcatcafe.com DOWN THE HATCH - Thu, Noa Zeb 10:30am12:30pm; Fri, Corey Rezner 10:30am-12:30pm; Sat, Kendall and The Armadillo 10:30am12:30pm; Sun, Alex Calma 10:30am-12:30pm;

Mon, Ian Galleisky 10:30am-12:30pm; Wed, Corey Rezner 10:30am-12:30pm; (658 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-4900; Dthmaui.com DUKE’S BEACH HOUSE - Thu, Ben DeLeon 3-5pm; Thu, Garrett Probst and Keali’i Lum 6-8:30pm; Fri, Garrett Probst 3-5pm; Fri, Damon Parrillo and Tim Osbourne 6-8:30pm; Sat, Danyel Alana 3-5pm; Sat, Damon Parrillo and Ron Hetten 6-8:30pm; Sun, Keali’i Lum 3-5pm; Sun, Damien Awai 6-8:30pm; Mon, Keali’i Lum 3-5pm; Mon, Danyel Alana and Guest 6-8:30pm; Tue, Ben DeLeon 3-5pm; Tue, Roy Kato and Guest 6-8:30pm; Wed, Garrett Probst 3-5pm; Wed, Malanai 6-8:30pm; (130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Ka‘anapali); 808-662-2900; Dukesmaui.com HULA GRILL - Thu, Kealii Lum and Friends 2-5pm; Thu, Damon Parillo and Friends 6-9pm; Fri, Derick Sebastian 11am-1pm; Fri, Ma’a 2-5pm; Sat, Kawika Lum Ho 2-5pm; Sat, Danyel Alana and Friends 6-9pm; Sun, Josh Lum 2-5pm; Sun, Lahui 6-9pm; Mon, Ua Aloha Maji 2-5pm; Mon, Keali’i Lum and Friends 6-9pm; Tue, Kawika Lum Ho 2-5pm; Tue, Wili Pohaku 6-9pm; Wed, Danyel Alana 2-5pm; Wed, Ernest Pua’a, Roy Kato and Kamuela Hamakua 6-9pm; (2435 Ka‘anapali Pkwy.); 808-667-6636; Hulagrillkaanapali.com JAPENGO AT HYATT REGENCY MAUI - ThuWed, Nightly Entertainment 6-8pm; (200 Nohea Kai Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-667-4727; Japengomaui.com JAVA JAZZ - Thu, Rick Glencross 7-10pm; Fri, Guest Musician 7-10pm; Sat, Rick Glencross 7-10pm; Mon, Mel and Sound Lab 7-10pm; Tue, Nino Toscano and Paul Bunuan 7-10pm; Tue, Nino Toscano and Paul Bunuan 7-10pm; Wed, Guest Musician 7-10pm; (3350 L. Honoapi‘ilani Rd., Honokowai); 808-667-0787; Javajazzmaui.com KA‘ANAPALI SHORES BEACH CLUB RESTAURANT - Wed, Benny Uyetake 6-9pm; (3445 L. Honoapi‘ilani Rd., Honokowai); 808-667-2211. KIMO’S - Thu, Ma’a 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Crazy Fingers Duo 8-10pm; Sat, Ma’a 6:30-8:30pm; Sun, Benny and Rock 6-8pm; Mon, Benny and Rock 6-8pm; Tue, Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm; Wed, Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm; (845 Front St., Lahaina); 808-661-4811; Kimosmaui.com LAHAINA PIZZA COMPANY - Thu, John Kane 7:30-9:30pm; Fri, John Kane 7:30-9:30pm; Sat, Joseph Chee 7:30-9:30pm; Wed, Scotty Rotten 7:30-9:30pm; (730 Front St., Lahaina); 808-6610700; Lahainapizzaco.com LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Thu, Josh Kahula and Dave of ‘Nuff Sedd’ 3-5pm; Fri, JD and Friends 3-5pm; Sun, ‘Kilohana’ Merv Oana and Duane Feig 3-5pm; Wed, Jarret Roback, Josh Kahula and Roy Kato 3-5pm; (2435 Ka‘anapali Pkwy.); 808-661-4495; Leilanis.com

MAY 18, 2017 25

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SANSEI - KAPALUA 115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

SANSEI - KIHEI 1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116 - 879-0004

SHEARWATER TAVERN 1279 S. Kihei Rd. - 793-2324

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 874-6444

STEEL HORSE SALOON 1234 L. Main St., Wailuku - 243-2206

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave. - 572-1380

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S. Kihei Rd. - 879-3133

TIFFANY’S 1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

WHAT ALES YOU 1913 S Kihei Rd. - 214-6581

LONGHI’S - Thu, Summer Macedo and Shawn McLauglin 5:30-7:30pm; Fri, Brian and Meryl 5:307:30pm; Sun, Two Cats 6-9pm; Mon, Chad Kaya 5:30-7:30pm; Tue, Wilmont Kahaialii and Shawn McLaughlin 5:30-7:30pm; (888 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-2288; Longhis.com MERRIMAN’S - Thu, Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30pm; Fri, Brian Massa and Meryl Yecies 3-5pm; Fri, Peter deAquino 3-5pm; Fri, Ranga Pae 5:308:30pm; Sat, Gabe and Austin 10am-1pm; Sat, Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30pm; Sun, Peter deAquino 3-5pm; Sun, David Wolf 5:30-8:30pm; Mon, David Wolf 3-5pm; Mon, David Wolf 5:308:30pm; Tue, Brian Massa and Meryl Yecies 3-5pm; Tue, Phil and Angela Benoit 5:308:30pm; Wed, Peter deAquino 3-5pm; Wed, Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30pm; (1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua); 808-669-6400; Merrimanshawaii.com PACIFIC’O ON THE BEACH - Fri, The Armadillo 4:30-6:30pm; Sat, David King 4:30-6:30pm; (505 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-4341; Pacificomaui.com PAILOLO BAR AND GRILL AT WESTIN KA‘ANAPALI RESORT - Thu, Live Music 6-9pm; Tue, Live Music 5-8pm; Wed, Live Music 5-8pm; (6 Kai Ala Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-6673200; Westinkaanapali.com/dining/pailolo PAU HUAKAI TIKI BAR - Fri, Josh Sumibcay 5-8pm; Mon, Kawika Ortiz 6-8pm; (180 Nohea Kai Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-662-1000; Kaanapalibeach.hyatt.com PI ARTISAN PIZZERIA - Fri, Danyel Alana 6-9pm; Mon, Scot Freeman 6-9pm; (900 Front St., Lahaina); 808-667-0791; Pi808.com PINEAPPLE GRILL - Fri, Johnny Ringo 3-6pm; Sat, Howard Ahia 3-6pm; Sun, Codae 6-8pm; (200 Kapalua Dr.); 808-669-9600; Pineapplegrillmaui.com PIONEER INN - Thu, Greg di Piazza 5-8pm; Tue, Ah-Tim Eleniki 5-8pm; (658 Wharf St., Lahaina); 808-661-3636; Pioneerinnmaui.com RELISH OCEANSIDE BAR AT WESTIN MAUI RESORT - Thu-Wed, Braddah Keoki Ruiz 6:309pm; (2365 Ka‘anapali Pkwy.); 808-667-2525; Westinmaui.com/dining/relish-oceanside SANGRITA GRILL AND CANTINA - Thu, Live Flamenco Music by Indio and Avi 6:30-8:30pm; (2580 Kekaa Dr., Ka‘anapali); 808-662-6000; Sangritagrill.com SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT AT NAPILI KAI RESORT - Thu, Phillip Stevens 7-9pm; Fri, Phillip Stevens 7-9pm; Sat, Fausto Allosada 7-9pm; Sun, Albert Kaina 7-9pm; Mon, Albert Kaina 7-9pm; Tue, Albert Kaina 7-9pm; Wed, Fausto Allosada 7-9pm; (5900 L. Honoapiilani Rd., Napili); 808-669-1500; Seahousemaui.com THE DIRTY MONKEY - Thu, Thu-Wed, Guest

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Nestor Ugale, 5pm

Damien Awai 5pm & Joe Chee 10pm

Joe Chee 5pm & Marc Dumalata 10pm

Vitamin D, 10pm

MON & TUE- Mondo Kane 5pm, WED- Kanoa 5pm

Jamie Gallo, 4-6pm, DJ Big Mike, 10pm

Randall Rospond 4-6pm, DJ Gemini & Ynot, 10pm

Tom Conway 4-6pm, DJ Kamikazee 10pm

Viva La Rumba 4pm, Sunday Lounge w/ DJ Joralien, 10pm

MON- Kanoa 4pm, DJ Big Mike 10pm, TUE- Jon Bowser 4-6pm, DJ Salvo 10pm, WED- Natalie Nicole 4pm, DJ Lobstah 10pm

TBA

MON-WED TBA

Karaoke w/ Dudley 9pm-12am; no cover

Jerry Caires Jr. Band, $5 cover, 8-12pm

Karaoke w/ Dudley 9pm-12am; no cover

Salsa Night w/ Barbara & Ernesto, 8pm-no cover

Capt Dan, 6:30-8:30pm

Karaoke, 8:30pm-close

Karaoke, 8pm-close

MON-WED-Karaoke, 8pm-close

Jason Arbilla, 7-9pm

Marc Dumalata, 7-9pm

Erica Ambrin, 7-9pm

Natalie Nicole, 7-9pm

MON- no music, TUE- Steve Norton 7-9pm, WED- Jon Bowser 7-9pm

Musician 3-6pm; (844 Front St., Lahaina); 808419-6268; Thedirtymonkey.com

SOUTH MAUI BOTERO LOUNGE AT GRAND WAILEA - ThuSat, Contemporary Hawaiian Music 5-10pm; (3850 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-875-1234; Grandwailea.com/experience/dine/botero-lounge CHEESEBURGER GRILLE AND TAP ROOM - Thu, Mark Burnett 6-8:30pm; Fri, Ben DeLeon 5:30-8:30pm; Sun, Ben DeLeon 5:30-8:30pm; (3750 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-874-8990; Cheeseburgernation.com DIAMOND’S ICE BAR AND nelli GRILL - Sun, Gina Martinelli ei Band 6-8pm; (1279 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-874-9299; Diamondsicebar.com GANNON’S - Thu, Ricardo Dioso 5:30-7:30pm; Fri, Fulton Tashombe 5:30-7:30pm; (100 Wailea Golf Club Dr.); 808-875-8080; Gannonsrestaurant.com

Sat, Makai Jazz Group 6:30-8:30pm; Sun, Celtic Tigers 7-9:30pm; (100 Kaukahi St., Wailea); 808874-1131; Mulligansontheblue.com OHANA SEAFOOD BAR AND GRILL - ThuWed, Contemporary Island Music 4-8pm; (1945 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-868-3247; Ohanaseafoodgrill.com PITA PARADISE - Sat, David Wolf 5:308pm; Sun, Phil and Angela Benoit 6:30-9pm; (34 Wailea Gateway Center); 808-879-7177; Pitaparadisehawaii.com SHEARWATER TAVERN - Thu, Nestor Ugale 5 7pm; Thu, Kan 5-7pm; Kanoa 5-7pm; Fri, Damien Awai 5-7pm; Fri, Joe Chee Jr. 10-10pm; Sat, Joe Chee Ch Jr. 5-7pm; Sat, Marc Duma Dumalata 10pm-12am; Sun, Vitam D 5-7pm; Mon, Mondo tamin Ka Kane 5-7pm; Tue, Mondo K Kane 5-7pm; (1279 S. Kih Rd.); 808-793-2324; hei Shearwatermaui.com

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S SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Thu, Jaime G Gallo 4-6pm; Fri, Randall R Rospond 4-6pm; Sat, Tom Co Conway 4-6pm; Sun, Viva R La Rumba 4-6pm; Mon, Kanoa 4-6pm Tue, Jon Bowser 4-6pm; 4-6pm; Wed, Na Natalie Nicole 4-6pm; Wed, Natalie Nicole 4-6pm; (1913 S. Kihei ) 808-874-6444; Southshoretikilounge.com Rd.);

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KONO’S ON THE GREEN Npm; Thu, Jim Spector 5:30-8:30pm; 30pm; Thu, Jim Spector 5:30-8:30pm; -8pm; Sat, Fri, Sal Godinez Band 5-8pm; Neto Peraza 5:30-7:30pm; Sun, Island Soul Dance Party 5-8pm; Wed, Jim Spector 5:307:30pm; (470 Lipoa Pkwy., Kihei); 808-6334220; Konosonmaui.com

LUANA LOUNGE AT FAIRMONT KEA LANI - Fri-Sat, Live Entertainment 7-10pm; (4100 Wailea Alanui Dr.); 808-875-4100; Fairmont. com/kea-lani-maui/dining/luana MAUI BREWING COMPANY - Sun, Randall Rospond 5-8pm; (605 Lipoa Pkwy., Kihei); 808213-3002; Mauibrewingco.com MONKEYPOD KITCHEN - Thu, Dat Guyz 1-3pm; Thu, Levi and Chad 4-6pm; Thu, Louis and Lewis 7-9pm; Fri, Stay EZ 1-3pm; Fri, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Fri, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Fri, Alika 7-9pm; Sat, Ron Kualaua 1-3pm; Sat, An Den 4-6pm; Sat, Randall Rospond 7-9pm; Sun, T-Flatz and The Highlights 1-3pm; Sun, Dat Guyz 4-6pm; Sun, Ohana Groove 7-9pm; Mon, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Mon, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Mon, Josh Kahula 7-9pm; Tue, Stay EZ 4-6pm; Tue, Ohana Groove 7-9pm; Wed, Damien and Brian 1-3pm; Wed, Alika 4-6pm; Wed, Jarret 7-9pm; (10 Wailea Gateway Center); 808891-2322; Monkeypodkitchen.com/wailea MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Thu, Pat Simmons Jr. 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Soul Kitchen 7-9pm;

4804; Facebook.com/Playmakers-Sports-Bar SEASCAPE MA‘ALAEA RESTAURANT - Fri, Kaulike Pescaia 5-7:30pm; (192 Ma‘alaea Rd.); 808-5149-3071; Mauioceancenter.com/dine STEEL HORSE SALOON - Wed, Luna Overdrive 8:30-11:30pm; (1234 L. Main St., Wailuku); 808-245-2206.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI CAFE MAMBO MAUI - Tue, Brant Quick 4-8pm; (30 Baldwin Ave., Paia); 808-579-8021; Cafemambomaui.com CAFE DES AMIS - Mon, Mark Johnstone 6:308:30pm; (42 Baldwin Ave., Paia); 808-579-6323; Cdamaui.com CHARLEY’S RESTAURANT AND SALOON - Thu, Mark Johnstone 6:30-8:30pm; Mon, Charley’s Live Band 7-10pm; Tue, Pat Simmons Jr. 6:30-8:30pm; Wed, Randall Rospond 6:308:30pm; (142 Hana Hwy., Paia); 808-579-8085; Charleysmaui.com NOURISH HEALTH BAR AND CAFE PAIA Sat, Live Acoustic 6-8pm; (161 Hana Hwy., Paia); Facebook.com/pg/NourishHealthBarMaui

THE RESTAURANT AT HOTEL WAILEA - Fri, Mark Johnstone 7-9pm; Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-9pm; (555 Kaukahi Rd., Wailea); 808-8792224; Hotelwailea.com/rhw WHAT ALES YOU - Thu, Jason Arcilla 7-9pm; Sat, Erica Ambrin 7-9pm; Wed, Jon Bowser 7-9pm; (1913 S. Kihei Rd.); 808-214-6581; WhatAlesYouMaui.com

CENTRAL MAUI BEACH BUMS - Fri, Mike Finkiewicz and Tom Cherry 5-8pm; Fri, Mark Burnett 5-8pm; Tue, Randall Rospond 5-8pm; Wed, Mark Burnett 5-8pm; (300 Ma‘alaea Rd.); 808-243-2286; Beachbumshawaii.com KAHILI RESTAURANT - Thu, Brian and Meryl 4-5:30pm; Wed, Ron Kuala’au 4-5:30pm; (2500 Honoapi‘ilani Hwy., Waikapu); 808-242-6000; Mauiliveevents.com KAHULUI ALE HOUSE - Thu-Wed, Local Live Music 5-8pm; (355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului); 808-877-9001; Kahuluialehouse.com PLAYMAKERS SPORTS BAR - Fri, Brant Quick 7-11pm; (928 L. Main St., Wailuku); 808-244-

MAY 18, 2017 27

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by Caeriel Crestin

Horoscope

Sign Language TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20)

Your Earthy cousins have it rough. Capricorns never take a break because their ambition won’t let them, and Virgos can’t relax and chill out because they simply have too much energy. Sometimes I wish they’d both take a page out of your book, since you know how to get shit done and occasionally stop and enjoy life. Won’t you share your hard-won wisdom with them, and get them to sit down long enough to smell some roses, drink some iced tea, and simply do nothing more than shoot the shit? Hint: getting them to stop what they’re doing may involve sitting on them and pinning them to the ground. (Watch out: they may bite; luckily, you can take them.)

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21)

Instead of looking at how much you have left to do, consider how much you’ve already done. Yes, the road ahead of you is long, but you’ve come a long way so far. That ought to give you strength and hope. Regarding the stretch ahead of you at the moment is too daunting. Instead, look back at what you’ve already endured and survived, and remind yourself you could do it again, and then some. Your trials and travails may have worn you down on the surface, but underneath they’ve tempered and developed your strength. Dig deep. You’ll find underneath your weary, exhausted exterior, you’re steel.

QUIZ understood

ANSWERS

...to questions from page 4

1: E–105 2: C–$444,500 3: C–Rep. Joe Souki

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20)

It’s new school vs. old school this week and guess what? You, of course, get to push for the new, better way of doing things. Newer isn’t always an improvement; quite often the opposite, actually, which is where the old school gets its strength. But this time, traditional sticks-in-the-mud have it wrong and it’s up to you to show (and prove) it to them. Are you up to the task? I think you are. Hint: “Do as I say, not as I do,” won’t cut it this week. You can’t tell them how things could be better. You have to show them. CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22)

A strong desire for surprises can often help you in life. In fact, they’re about the only thing you can, ultimately, count on. Having expectations–of your children, say– will only lead to disappointment. However, entering parenthood or a relationship with excitement about all the unknowable things the new person will bring into your life is going to make you much happier than the vain hope that you can effectively steer them or your connection in any direction. How deep is your thirst for exploring uncontrollable, thrilling new territory with someone new? This week, swallow a spoonful of salt or do whatever it takes to make sure it’s fairly unquenchable, because that’s what you’ll be up to. LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22)

Imagine you were an animal with only one chance per year of having a baby. If predators or circumstance claimed a few of your precious infants, it would be quite hard to contemplate trying again. Hopefully, you would, anyway, and you’d also be smart enough to attempt a different strategy to help your child survive. Luckily, you can breed whenever you like. Falling in love, however, is another matter. Most Leos only open to that every so often–and with less frequency after being hurt or screwed over. However, I hope you haven’t given up forever–and that, when you do allow the possibility again, you try something truly different, something that might just allow your love to survive. VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

Although world-renowned as the epitome of practicality, you ought to be equally well-known for some of your cockamamie ideas. You’re usually a miracle of efficiency, so practically no one notices when you pour your abundant energy into these truly twisted and deluded ventures, except those closest to you (who probably tried to stop you, and would have, if you weren’t so stubborn). I won’t try to convince you not to pursue your latest private obsession (these zany side trips are part of what I love about you). However, if your idiosyncrasies get in the way of something undeniably real (like your relationship), would you consider, at least this week, taking them down a notch or two? LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22)

If you ask advice of a friend, be prepared to seriously consider taking it, even if it’s not what you want to hear. You’re under absolutely no obligation to do what they say–but you ought to give it a fair listen. If you’re simply fishing for validation, don’t piss off your friends by ignoring them if they don’t give it to you. Everyone deludes themselves at times. Sometimes you have the benefit of a straight-talking, no-bullshit friend who’ll help you cut through an illusion or two, if you let them. This week, won’t you let them?

As I write this, it’s been raining for days, and even the most adventurous Sags I know have become homebodies, staring glumly out their spotted windows and waiting for the sun to return. You know the feeling, don’t you? Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about a situation except cool your heels and wait it out. That’s exactly the case this week. Being proactive will only frustrate and exhaust you, and possibly make circumstances worse. Chill out. The more you can give this knotty situation a bit of breathing space, the more likely it will untangle itself. CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19)

You need carrots, not cattle-prods, this week. You’ve had enough nagging and ass-kicking in your life lately. You deserve some kind of reward. Not a vacation, not yet. You’ve still got a lot to do. But maybe you can find a way to treat yourself after every step along the way? You might need the promise (and delivery) of sweet treats, massages, dates or screws to get you through the next few chapters. Don’t deny yourself. Being stern and hard on yourself isn’t going to cut it at the moment. Be sweet, gentle and encouraging instead.

VOTED BEST

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18)

Don your verbal boxing gloves, because it’s time to step up (again) and go to battle for what you know is right and just. Why you? It’s your job, I’m afraid. You’re the most versatile and rugged of the air signs, and uniquely qualified. Libras make great politicians and moderators, and Geminis are funny and inventive. But only you can marry emotion to fact effectively and not be knocked out by a determined counterattack. That’s what’s required this week: someone to stand up for what they believe in who can take a few punches and keep on fighting. Like it or not, darling, that’s you. PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20)

It’s like you were bitten by a Volkswagen-sized spider, and now you’re just waiting, paralyzed, for it to return and suck out your insides. Only the waiting can last months or years, and there’s no spider venom; this incapacitation is purely self-induced. What you need to know is that it only gets worse; the longer you wait before you act, the harder it will be. The thing you also need to know is that it’s never too late to step up and do something. Quit waiting, you delusional creature. Haven’t you suffered enough? I guarantee that whatever you do now will hurt you less, in the long run, than not doing anything, and, even if it stings a bit now, you won’t regret it.

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ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19)

Is anybody still listening to you? Sometimes, you get so impassioned about something that you can go on. And on. And not even notice that everyone you’re talking to has tuned out, or even walked away. Pay attention, darling. Most of the people around you adore you, but if you take that adoration for granted, it might just get a bit frayed around the edges. Success and happiness this week means seeing the world as it is, and that means noticing that not everyone shares your enthusiasms. You still ought to share them–but perhaps in slightly smaller doses. To contact Caeriel send mail to sign.language.astrology@gmail.com

MAY 18, 2017 29

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