08.38 North Shore Lifeguards, March 17, 2005, Volume 8, Issue 38, MauiTime by MauiTimes

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Hammerheads & Knuckleheads What it’s like to be North Shore lifeguards By Courtney Mather

5 HIKE THIS!

Tuition plan means more money, less students

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• • • • • •

•Hammerheads & Knuckleheads What it’s like to be North Shore lifeguards – by Courtney Mather

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•Letters to the Editor •Eh Brah!

•LC Watch •Food Cops •Hike This! •Coconut Wireless •Overheard...

•News of the Weird •Ted Rall Cartoon

•Op Ed: Capital Madness The slow demise of capital punishment – by Ted Rall

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Associate Editor: Samantha Campos sam@mauitime.com Calendar Goddess: Kim Welch kim@mauitime.com

How Zane Monteleone made his dream come true – by Christy Miles

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Contributing Writers: Caeriel Crestin, Courtney Mather, Christy Miles, Reese Quick, Chuck Shepherd, Ted Rall, Cole Smithey Illustration: Guy Junker, Glenn Watson Photography: Sean M. Hower, Kirsten Guenther

•Gambling with Guacamole

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Interns: Kellie Holliday, Gabrielle Poccia Art Director: Rudi King rudi@mauitime.com

The expanding Fiesta Time empire – by Anthony Pignataro

Production Assistants: Wendy Higa, Lisa Lappe

Hours, locations and price ranges of Maui’s eateries

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28 •The Grid & Calendar listings

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MAILING ADDRESS: 658 Front St., Ste. 126A-7278 Lahaina, HI 96761 PHYSICAL ADDRESS: 505 Front St., Ste. 216 Lahaina, HI 96761

5 MARCH 17, 2005

LETTERSTOTHEEDITOR

HAPPY ST. PATTY’S DAY PAI A Fi s h M ar k et Restaurant

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Tides & times Tide-times set for Honolulu - subtract as follows: Kahului: 1hr 41min Hana: 1hr 23 min Makena: 0hr 32min Kihei/Ma`alaea: 0hr 22 min Lahaina: 0hr 40 min

17 Sun R 6:38A Thur Sun S 6:42P

L 7:27A +0.2 H 9:56A +0.3

L 2:24P +0.2 H 11:21P +1.6

Sun R 6:37A Fri Sun S 6:42P

L 7:54A +0.2

H 12:14P +0.4 L 4:10P +0.2

19 Sun R 6:36A Sat Sun S 6:42P

H 12:24A +1.6 H 1:05P +0.5 L 8:16A +0.1 L 5:38P +0.2

20 Sun R 6:35A Sun Sun S 6:43P

H 1:12A +1.7 H 1:38P +0.6 L 8:35A +0.1 L 6:39P +0.1

Sun R 6:34A Mon Sun S 6:43P

H 1:50A +1.7 H 2:08P +0.7 L 8:53A +0.0 L 7:27P +0.0

22 Sun R 6:33A Tue Sun S 6:43P

H 2:22A +1.8 H 2:39P +0.9 L 9:10A +0.0 L 8:09P +0.0

23 Sun R 6:32A Wed Sun S 6:44P

H 2:51A +1.8 H 3:10P +1.1 L 9:28A +0.0 L 8:50P +0.0

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HYPHEN THIS! I picked up a copy of Maui Time last week while on vacation and liked it a lot. I’ve been a journalist for 20 years myself. One small thing I wanted to point out. The cover statement “Maui’s only independent & locally-owned newspaper” does not need a hyphen. “Locally” is an adverb, and the “ly” at the end of adverbs takes the place of hyphens. In other words, you could write it is “a local-owned paper” or “a locally owned paper.” You can see how the first one needs a hyphen for clarity, but the second doesn’t. Don’t take this as one of those nit-picky letters readers write to gloat about any little typo they find. I wouldn’t point out a one-time mistake or even bring it up if I didn’t like the paper, but this is right on the cover and it’s a standing head that’s going to be used every week. -Gary Warth, via email The Editor responds: It took some doing—couple meetings, about 10 pounds of paperwork, some more meetings, then those endless conference calls with the New York and San Francisco offices—but we made the change. Thanks.

BUT WE LIKE IMAGINARY FRIENDS Regarding your “Spaceman” story (Mar. 3, 2005): There is no such thing as an “imaginary friend.” However, there ARE visitors from non-ordinary reality. If you grow out of your apparent hipster phase you will learn that it is not “mediocre” to be short and fat (or big nosed and Jewish or any other stereotype). Look to new ideas and possibilities in consciousness. There’s more to life than being hip and sharp-witted. Of course it’s just fine that Mr. Nidle’s ideas don’t match your own although trying to criticize a person based on the way they look is weak and a bit outdated don’t ya think? As one of the few rags on Maui I hope you will choose to be a little more broad in your vision.

Or just write about subjects that are in your field of understanding? Perhaps the teeny weeny club scene and all the dope people that hang out therein or all the great trips one can take on ayahuasca and pretend you’re really spiritual... There’s lots of subjects and you won’t have to bother insulting unhip thinkers like Spaceman. Good Luck. -11:11 Art Studio, via email The Editor responds: Actually 11:11 Art Studio—which I seriously doubt is your real name--we’ve progressed from the apparent hipster phase to the apparent pupa phase. But thanks for caring.

CORRECTION The two quotes describing anti-Superferry activists that we attributed to Honolulu Advertiser reporter Timothy Hurley in our March 3, 2005 story “So-Called Environmentalists” were incorrect. The first quote negligently misstated the lead paragraph of Hurley’s Feb. 20, 2005 story describing Superferry opponents. The second quote should have been identified as an amalgam of anti-activist statements collected during an Advertiser survey, which were reported in Hurley’s Feb. 22, 2005 story.

Maui Time welcomes letters commenting on our coverage, but only if they’re complimentary. If you still wish to complain about something, please have the decency to use plenty of bad punctuation and grammar—that makes it easier for us to make fun of you when we respond. Send your letters to the editor via e-mail (letters@mauitime.com), regular mail (Letters to the Editor, Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A-7278, Lahaina, HI 96761) or fax (808-661-0446). All correspondence must include your full name, hometown and phone number.

EH BRAH! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less, changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A–7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com

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MARCH 17, 2005

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(888) HONOLUA

To the impatient driver coming out of Kihei towards Waikapu on Honoapiilani Highway: did you get your license out of a Cracker Jack box? You didn’t want to follow in traffic behind me so you had to steer right on the merging lane to pass me. You chose to speed up, rather than wait and merge when the way was clear to get into my lane. But you kept driving on the right—even when the merge lane ran out! Didn’t you think it was odd that you were the only guy driving on the sidewalk as you made your way to Waikapu? Do you also know that, at your speed, all you had to do was clip my vehicle to send your vehicle spinning out of control? Unlike you, you see, I was traveling with my family and their safety came first.

MAUICOUNTY

BY GABRIELLE POCCIA

Hike This!

Farewell Jimmy and Joe

University of Hawaii plan means more money, less students My fellow students and I hadn’t been standing on Ka’ahumanu Ave. in Kahului for long when the juggler jogged by. Actually, he wasn’t juggling at that point, but was just holding his balls. He took a look at our anti-tuition hike placards warning “Equality Through Education,” “Tuitions Hiked, Dreams Ruined” and the ever popular “Starving Student Will Work for Tuition.” “Give it a rest,” he said, then juggled away. The University of Hawaii Board of Regents’ plans to jack up community college resident tuition from the current $47 per unit to a whopping $89 per unit by

Food Cops The following tale is taken straight from official complaints and inspection reports on file with the State of Hawaii Department of Health Food Safety office.

Establishment Lahaina Fish Co.

Location 531 Front St, Lahaina

Date Nov. 22, 2004

Time 1:58 p.m. The quality of the “employee meal” should be an example of basic standards for any restaurant. Two out of 15 Lahaina Fish Company employees apparently became sick after being fed mahi mahi meals. That led to an inspection after they filed a report with the Disease Investigation Unit of the Department of Health. It’s unclear which company delivered the questionable fish as the carrying box was thrown away the day prior to the investigation. The sanitarians reported no temperature or preparation violations with the food being served to customers. But the health department did inform management about the possible food-poisoning case. The managers claimed that no fish is prepared after two days but conceded that the subject fish might have been there for three days. The managers also insisted that there are “no leftovers served to employees or used at all.” A sample piece of fish was given for testing, though it was not part of the fish involved in the case. -G. Poccia

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Everyone learns how to write in college 2011 have become big news. After all, that translates into an increase of around $2,000 per term for full-time university students. But missing from the mainstream media discussion is that the hikes will almost certainly lead to a decrease in college enrollment. Yet UH school officials don’t seem concerned about that. A tuition proposal briefing linked to the University of Hawaii web site (www.hawaii.edu/ovppp/tuition) claims that a steady tuition rise of three and a half percent in 2004 has translated into more students attending MCC. Of course, the proposed tuition raise will be vastly greater than a meager three and half percent—we’re talking about a better than 14 percent increase each year. Can anyone say “financial assistance?” This comes at a bad time. According to the same website mentioned above, the U.S. Department of Education is restricting the eligibility for the popular PELL Grants. While President George W. Bush has announced that the maximum amount of money available from the PELL grant will rise $100 a year for five years, eventually reaching a total of $4,550, it will be more difficult for students under 24 and still considered to be dependants to qualify for that money. Students in Hawaii have actually enjoyed some of the lowest tuition rate hikes, averaging just three and half percent a year compared to most states that see 10 percent hikes. In 1996, UH watched an immense 50 percent tuition hike translate into a six percent drop in enrollment. A year later, the Hawaii University system raised tuition again, this time by 20 percent—another four percent of students vanished.

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Tuition Rate Hikes On March 31, the UH Board of Regents will meet at noon at the MCC Student Lounge to discuss the proposed rate hikes. It will be the last opportunity for the public to be heard on this matter. Public meetings have already been held at the Hilo and Manoa campuses and will continue at Leeward Community College on Oahu, Kauai Community College and MCC by the end of the month. After the Maui meeting the Board of Regents will make their decision. Right now anti-hike organizers are trying to get as many MCC students to the Maui hearing as possible. Their goal is to drive home the point that the whole concept of gradual tuition increases—as described by the Hawaii University system— is to be “fairer to a greater number of students.” As the theory goes, development of our colleges will benefit everyone. But increases that nearly double the cost of getting an education may leave many students with a diminished quality of life or worse, simply unable to afford college. That’s why we won’t be giving it a rest anytime soon. MTW

After a mostly successful four-year run, the comedy team of Jimmy and Joe performed their last routines together during the Mar. 9, 2005 Maui County Liquor Commission meeting. It was the end of a five-year contract for Jimmy—aka Commission Chairman James Gomes,—but Commissioner Joseph “Joe” Tanaka still has another year with the network. The mugging and banter that marked their comedy duo went on virtually non-stop during their show’s hour-and-a-half series finale—a result that was partially due to the presence of Akaku’s three video cameras. But it was nice to see the team save some of their A material for the end. Joe began with one of his more popular bits— the questioning of the prospective licensee, who in this case was Michael Capuano of Wow-wee Maui’s Kava Bar & Grill in Kahului. “What kind of customers will kava attract?” Joe asked Capuano, who seemed more than willing to play the straight man. “Actually, the mayor was in last night having some,” he said. “Put it on record!” said Joe, prompting the rest of the Commission and some of the audience to laugh. A few moments later, Capuano explained that kava isn’t a hallucinogenic substance at all. “I had 17 cups to test it out,” he said. “You look it,” said Jimmy, still wielding his trademark wit. Then he pointed to his longtime partner. “Actually, moving on,” said Jimmy, “he’s the one who really needs some.” Near the end of the meeting, Joe fell back on the “senile old man” routine that’s made him such a legend around LC headquarters by suddenly pointing out the Akaku cameras. “You’ve been here two hours and you just noticed the cameras?!” asked Jimmy, prompting great belly-laughs from the audience. “He just woke up!” said another commissioner, trying to muscle in on the act. But Joe stayed strong. “He’s the only guy wearing red,” he said of Jimmy a few minutes later. “How come?” “He finally woke up,” Jimmy said, shaking his head slowly. The meeting ended shortly thereafter. The network has yet to announce the show’s replacement. Goodnight Jimmy and Joe, wherever you are.

The Jimmy and Joe Show will air for the last time on Friday, Mar. 18 at 7:30 p.m on Akaku’s Vision TV, Channel 53. MTW

—Anthony Pignataro

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MARCH 17, 2005

MAUICOUNTY WEDNESDAY, MAR. 9 Well, the civil war raging throughout the county over the future of the Akaku public access cable channels seems to be coming along nicely, according to a piece in today’s Maui News. In fact, the station’s board meeting last night on state efforts to divert Akaku money to education went on for hours—nearly as long, in fact, as one of the county planning hearings it often televises gavel to gavel. Even Mayor Alan Arakawa got into the act, blistering station manager Sean McLaughlin for “squabbling about a little bit of money” ($700,000, to be exact). Then Councilwoman Jo Anne Johnson stepped up to rip developer Everett Dowling—the father of the movement to slash Akaku’s funding in the first place. Of course, Dowling wasn’t at the hearing. That’s because, as he’s said in the past (see “Everett’s Bills,” Mar. 3), this whole issue has nothing to do with speech… An unrelated story in the same News issue notes that our honorable state senators have seen fit to pass a bill boosting tax credits for filmmakers coming to Hawaii from four percent of their production expenses to a whopping 15 percent if they shoot on Oahu and 20 percent if they head to Neighbor Islands. Yay for Hawaii! Of course, their esteemed colleagues over in the state House see loving Hawaii a bit differently, and let die a bill that would have banned smoking on state beaches and public areas.

THURSDAY, MAR. 10 It’s Day 24 of Lahaina resident Jason Reardon’s ban from visiting Ka’anapali

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

Beach. In court yesterday, Judge Joseph Cardozo extended that ban until Reardon’s trial begins on April 11. And there’s every indication that the state Attorney General’s office will sentence the 19-year-old to Hawaii’s first ever lifetime ban from a public district. Reardon’s apparently unpardonable crime? That would be allegedly selling marijuana to an undercover police officer. Yeah, sounds like a crime against humanity to me. And the fact that it happened on Maui, in an area populated with tourists, is just too insane to believe.

FRIDAY, MAR. 11 Congressman Ed Case (D, 2nd District) just faxed over a list of pork he managed to secure for Hawaii from a monster $300 billion transportation bill just passed out of the U.S. House of Representatives. Maui’s cut included $3 million for a Lahaina Bypass road and another cool mil for the Kahului Airport Access Road. To be honest, I’m amazed Case was able to bring home such amounts, considering the hysterical antiDemocrat bias that infects the House’s Republican leadership. It’s so bad, even former GOP congressional attack dog Newt Gingrich is appalled. “Gingrich himself in recent interviews has been openly critical of House Republicans for blocking the Democrats from even offering amendments to bills on the House floor,” wrote veteran reporter Elizabeth Drew in the Mar. 24 issue of The New York Review of Books. “The Republicans have carried oneparty rule to unprecedented lengths. They have often excluded Democrats from writing bills in committee and from House-Senate conferences on bills both chambers have passed.”

OVERHEARD... “I WONDER HOW MUCH IT SUCKS TO BE PART OF THE UGLY CROWD.” -Girl talking at Hecocks in Lahaina, Mar. 13

COCONUT WIRELESS THE WEEK IN REVIEW

SUNDAY, MAR. 13 Front-page story in today’s News says property values are up statewide. The story contains other shocking revelations like the fact that local public officials—unlike the public officials from every other municipality in the U.S.—“are having to consider demands for tax relief along with resident’s demands for services in balancing how much to give back.” Man, Hawaii’s cutting edge on this whole taxes vs. services thing.

MONDAY, MAR. 14 Finally, people are starting to say some nice things about Maui’s glamorous resorts. And not just any resort, but the Grand Wailea Resort Hotel & Spa. Man, people really trash that place all the time—so much so you’d think the country actually distrusted rich people and their need to spend huge sums of money on garish opulence, as though that were a bad thing. Anyway, The Maui News finally ran a big front-page story on the general grandness of the massive Grand Wailea’s recycling practices. Now I suppose that even “green” resorts like the Grand Wailea still suck up gobs of water and energy in their quest to cater to the whims of world’s affluent, but isn’t it worth it? Shouldn’t making sure the wealthy and powerful have everything they need be a concern to us all?

TUESDAY, MAR. 15

SATURDAY, MAR. 12 A little late, but the Maui County Council has decided to weigh in on the Superferry issue by saying—unanimously, in fact—that the state should order a full environmental assessment before the big boats start disgorging cars at Kahului Harbor. The resolution, reported in today’s Maui News, carries about as much legal weight as a drunk yelling from a street corner— especially considering that the state Senate has already decreed that an Environmental Impact Statement (EIS) isn’t necessary. Still, it was a generous gesture. And it even put Superferry CEO John Garibaldi’s panties in a twist. In fact, he told the council that a full EIS would “cause the immediate failure of the project” since his investors have demanded an agreement by June 30. Really? And they would never, ever promise you money again if the state legislature suddenly decided that an EIS was in order? Some CEO you are.

News of the legislative attack on Akaku has apparently gone nationwide. “[W]e at the Alliance for Community Media are distressed and saddened to hear of the dispute which pits Maui Community College (MCC) against Akuku: Maui Community Television,” wrote Anthony Riddle, the Washington, D.C.based Alliance’s executive director in a letter dated today. The letter is filled with vanilla think-tank speak, but does come down on the side of our public access cable providers. “Operations run by separately incorporated non-profits like Akaku: Maui Community TV offer the freedom and community control we all value while protecting the government and college from law-suits [sic] and political pressures,” he added. Protection from political pressures?! I so hope he’s kidding. Anthony Pignataro has long felt Hollywood should make more Speed films. MTW

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MARCH 17, 2005

NEWS

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BY CHUCK SHEPHERD

three patrol-car crashes.

Producers announced in February that they were still planning to bring the 3year-old London stage show Jerry Springer, The Opera to America in early 2006, despite increasingly vituperative protests of religious groups. The show features “Jerry” mediating confessions in hell between Satan, God, Jesus, Mary, and various biblical characters, complete with a raucous audience periodically chanting “Jer-ree! Jer-ree!” Reportedly, 300 to several thousand curse words are in the script and the show’s Jesus is a pudgy, diaperwearing gay man who is apparently coprophilic. When the BBC televised a showing, it reported 50,000 complaints, with some physical threats directed to the station’s staff and their families.

FENG SHUI IN DECLINE In January, police in Hong Kong arrested two men on suspicion of stealing a boatload of spiritually regarded pine trees, which they allegedly intended to sell to feng shui practitioners; the scheme failed when their boat, apparently lacking feng shui’s “harmony” and “positive energy,” broke down. Also in January, the Hong Kong company Life Enhance introduced briefs and boxer shorts that it says will bring harmony by virtue of the dragon on the front—that gives balance in this, the “year of the rooster.” Said a Life Enhance spokeswoman, “If you have a dragon on your underpants, you will be protected.”

LEAST COMPETENT COPS Circleville, Ohio, police officer Troy Brungs, 35, was still on the job in January despite having in the last five years three suspensions, seven written reprimands, eight written orders for counseling and

CUTTING-EDGE COPS A downtown problem in Manila is that pedestrians create a traffic hazard when many of them rush into the street almost indiscriminately to seek rides from passing cars. Thus, in January, police began to attach large wet blankets to some official vehicles roaming the streets, with the blankets flapping against the pedestrians, soiling their clothes and herding them back to the sidewalks. Pedestrians who remain in the street after being flayed are arrested.

FINER POINTS OF THE LAW In a December Rocky Mountain News report, Colorado’s one-size-fits-all juvenilesex-offender program was widely criticized as one of the nation’s least sensible, with restrictions for a one-time incident of adolescent curiosity nearly as harsh as for teenage predators. In the former category was “Victor,” who is barred from public venues where younger children go, must file an action plan with his treatment team to visit other venues, must phone his parents hourly, must avert his eyes if he inadvertently sees young children, and has formal requirements for which his parents must pay—group therapy weekly, individual therapy twice a week and periodic polygraph tests. Victor’s exasperated therapist said he considers the boy “normal.”

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MARCH 17, 2005

Calling All Moms!

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BY TED RALL

Capital Madness The slow demise of capital punishment

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One of the most famous Taliban executions was one they didn’t carry out. The accused, convicted by a Sharia court of raping and murdering a young woman, sat in the mud near the goalpost of a soccer stadium in Kabul, his arms tightly bound to a chair. The victim’s father was brought before the condemned man to determine his fate: Sharia law gave him that right. If he gave the go-ahead, the man would be dispatched with a gunshot to the back of the head, providing satisfaction and entertainment to thousands. The murdered woman’s father could

we squeamish Americans support the death penalty if he had to watch the terror in the eyes of the condemned on TV? Murderers and probably rapists deserve to die. But, as has been proven by the release of dozens of “killers” and “rapists” exonerated by newfound evidence, the courts cannot always determine who has killed or raped with 100 percent certainty. A state that has killed one innocent person is forever morally bankrupt. It’s better to let a million criminals go free than to punish one who hasn’t done anything wrong. Those who make the Napoleonic argument—gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet—are no better than the murderers they

WHEN I ASKED PRISONERS BEING HELD IN A JAIL FOR CAPITAL CRIMES WHETHER THEY HAD REGRETS, THEY SMILED: “ONLY THAT I GOT CAUGHT.” also opt for an intermediate punishment. It was fairly common for the aggrieved to demand goats or a period of time working as an indentured servant in lieu of the death penalty. Afghan culture demands stoicism, even bravado, from those facing death. When I asked prisoners being held in a jail for capital crimes whether they had regrets, they smiled: “Only that I got caught.” Would you do it again? “Definitely.” So the crowd was surprised when the murderer begged his victim’s father to spare him. “I’m so sorry,” he blubbered, “please don’t kill me, I’ll do anything you want. Please!” He went on like that until the old man kicked over the murderer’s chair. He spat on the ground. “How could I kill you?” he asked. “You have already died as a man.” He went home, and the spectators drifted away. The story goes that the killer’s disgusted family threw him out onto the streets, where the coward died a beggar because no one would give him any money. It’s a harsh story. Yet the Taliban system of capital punishment, though barbaric, would be a distinct improvement over ours. It was certainly more honest. Instead of spinning fanciful and repeatedly dispelled tales that executions deter crime, the Taliban admitted that they killed killers to assuage their society’s lust for vengeance. That’s why they gave victims and survivors, rather than civil servants, the final say. Although they often assumed a carnival atmosphere in a society where stonings and amputations were the only entertainment, public executions required the public to assume personal responsibility for their bloodlust just by being there. Would

purport to judge. The death penalty relies on too many fictions—that the courts are always right, that defendants in capital cases have access to adequate legal representation and exculpatory evidence such as DNA tests, that housing prisoners is costlier than endless litigation—for a civilized country to keep it on the books. The abolition of the death penalty for children under 18 (following a three-year-old decision to stop executing the mentally disabled) is a positive step in the right direction. Besides removing the United States from the tiny list of kid-killing countries, which includes Iran, Saudi Arabia, Pakistan and China, the Supreme Court’s decision recognizes the fact that the rest of the world matters. Acknowledging the “overwhelming weight of international opinion against [it],” the court wrote: “Our determination that the death penalty is disproportionate punishment for offenders under 18 finds confirmation in the stark reality that the United States is the only country in the world that continues to give official sanction to the juvenile death penalty.” Execution was originally touted as an appropriate adult punishment for children guilty of particularly heinous “adult crimes.” Yet the 22 children who have been executed during the last 20 years—13 in Texas—were not serial killers who drank soup out of their victims’ skulls, but kids convicted of garden-variety mayhem. Though welcome, the latest narrowing merely reemphasizes capital punishment’s intrinsic absurdity. Is a 17-1/2-year-old murderer so different from an 18-year-old that the former should have his life spared while the latter should not? Law should strive for rationality, a goal largely realized through consistency. The death penalty is inherently inconsistent and therefore intrinsically irrational. MTW

SURF&SPORTS

BY CHRISTY MILES

‘True Local Surf Shop’ How Zane Monteleone made his dream come true

Monteleone (right) and his father hang at the shop Surf shops in Lahaina seem to come and go like the trade winds. But one local owner wants to break that trend. His name is Zane Monteleone. Born and bred on Maui, he’s a 22-year-old Lahainaluna High School graduate. He’s spent the last two years building his InZane Surf Co. into a shop he hopes will survive. “I wanted to have a shop that would allow me to live in Lahaina for the rest of my life,” Monteleone says. “I wanted to do something that I really love and surfing is what I am passionate about.”

InZane Surf Co. Located in the Lahaina Center on Wainee St. in Lahaina. For more information, call 661-4289. Monteleone’s parents have worked in the retail business since he was born. He attended Kamehameha III, Lahaina Intermediate and Lahainaluna. It was in high school that Monteleone says he realized that there were plenty of resources for students preparing for college, but not nearly as much for those who wanted to work right after graduating— those who wanted to become chefs, hair stylists, for instance. When he graduated, Monteleone went straight into the restaurant business, starting at Lahaina’s Hard Rock Café. He says his time there brought him knowledge that would later help him out—mostly, how to run a business. When hired, he was just 17. He also says he sought advice from friends and family who had started their own small businesses. After a few years in the restaurant industry, Monteleone decided to break out and start on his own. He thought of opening a surf shop, then

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began working through what he’d need to do to get it started. “I started making surf designs and potential logos for the store,” Monteleone said. “One day I was hanging out with my Uncle Max and he called me InZane. It just stuck with me.” The toughest part was saving enough money to start buying merchandise. Once the stuff came in, he went to work putting his logo on hats, collared shirts, t-shirts, shorts and swimsuits. The seemingly obvious site for his store was Front Street, but Monteleone ended up leasing a space in the Lahaina Center next to the Nagasako store. “I want to keep my shop local,” he says. “Local as in a true local surf shop where people can come in, talk story, watch surf videos and talk about surfing trips. There is too much commotion on Front Street. I’d rather have local traffic. Plus, I think it’s cool that I am the only surf shop in Lahaina that isn’t corporately owned. All of those surf shops look like a department store with surfboards on the wall. I want to keep my store original.” It certainly is that. Inside there are murals depicting a huge orange octopus, mermaid and sunset. My favorite is the mushrooms that adorn the left and right walls. The clothing is colorful and welcoming. There are the usual trucker hats, pin-stripped collared shirts, bikinis, camouflage shorts, short skirts and bags throughout the store. Not so usual is the display case containing stickers that say, “Donkeys go home” and “I like ooph please” as well as beautiful jewelry from India. Television sets are on non-stop, showing surfers catching waves all over the world. Monteleone even put in a table with chairs to encourage customers to sit down and talk story. “With strong support from ‘ohana and friends, you can achieve anything you want in life,” he says. So far, there’s every reason to believe he’s right. MTW

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Hammerheads & Knuckleheads

Whether surfing at Kanaha or swimming the waters along Baldwin beach, I always appreciate knowing there are lifeguards there to lend a hand. Just in case. To find out more about our hunky red-clad protectors, I spoke with David Gallagher and Tony Colletta. They’ve been county lifeguards for 11 and five years, respectively. Maui Time: Between the two of you, you cover all three North Shore beaches. Tell me more about where you work… Colleta: I work mostly at Baldwin and Ho’okipa. I’m at Ho’okipa two days a week. It’s a high percentage of high-level surfers and windsurfers. Gallagher: I work at Kanaha. Kanaha and Ho’okipa are internationally known places. Both are very cosmopolitan and international. For this reason, it helps to have a grasp on several different languages. Communication is very important, especially in a dangerous situation. [David mumbles something in German starting with “Werd Deich” and I look at him quizzically.] Gallagher: It means “Sit down and hold on.” Colleta: Or “Pelegro por favor.” That means something like “There’s danger!” in Spanish. Gallagher: Sometimes you have to speak the language of the person you are helping because they don’t necessarily respect you otherwise. With different personalities you have to become more commanding. There’s a very fine balance between being professional and polite and being assertive. Still, we are rescue officers, not enforcement officers. We have no legal authority to stop anyone from doing anything. According to our captain, David Emerson, we can only warn and advise. So we lean a lot on communicating with people before they make the decision to do something stupid. There’s an old saying, “God watches out for drunks, sailors and fools.” Sometimes they do find themselves in exceptionally good hands. Does this end up translating into a lot of water rescues? Colleta: First aids are probably the most common assistance that we provide, whether it’s for reef cuts or boards colliding into people. Still, we do have water rescues at all the beaches—Kanaha, Baldwin and Ho’okipa. But each beach has its priorities. At Baldwin, there’s large surf but it’s mostly shore break. So it’s not uncommon for someone to get stuck in a rip or pounded by the shore break causing spinal or cervical [neck] injuries. At Ho’okipa, you have large surf and

By Courtney Mather 10

MARCH 17, 2005

COVER STORY

What it’s like to be North Shore lifeguards

allagh G d i v Da

Tony Collet ta

everything that goes along with it… broken boards, broken leashes, someone swimming in. Ho’okipa is one of the busiest beaches in the county, has the most consistent surf in the county and has the largest surf for a surfing beach in the county. You have large surf, a populated beach with a number of different surf spots out there and that all adds up to a lot of action and a lot of rescues. So we all stay pretty active over there. David works at Kanaha where you tend to do more outer reef surf rescues with the jet ski. Tell me about the challenges you face out there. Gallagher: In the winter, a really

challenging situation is having to swim your jet ski in when it breaks down in big surf. See, when the surf gets really big, there’s a lot of debris in the water. When there’s debris in the water, just a little stick can shut your whole jet ski down. When this happens and you’ve got 20foot waves breaking, you have to say to yourself, “Shhh. Calm down. It’s okay. You are trained well enough to deal with whatever happens.” I stand on the shoulders of giants. The giants are the people who have taught me how to operate a ski, how to go out there. These are all men younger than me, but I have the humility to learn from

them because they have more experience than me. Colleta: I look at it as your life is depending on the jet ski. I’ve been out the last two biggest days in history at Jaws. It’s gnarly, you know. You put your life on that jet ski, and you’ve got 80-foot waves, and you are trying to get back in. I can’t even imagine. I feel scared just looking at waves that size from shore. Gallagher: These waves want to kill you. They want to crush you. And that’s just the ocean. And you respect their power and the fact that you don’t have that kind of power. All you have is your own Hammerheads: continued on page 12

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Hammerheads: continued from page 11

intelligence and training to deal with it. Colleta: It’s wild. Gallagher: Sometimes I think, “I’m not getting paid enough to do this!” Colleta: I don’t do it for the money. If you do lifeguarding for the money, then you are doing the wrong thing. Gallagher: When someone that I am rescuing says “Hey, I can’t pay you for a rescue,” I say, “You pay taxes don’t you? This is your tax dollars working for you. This is the county government working for you, serving you.” Sounds like you take great pride in your work. Gallagher: I have to say I’m in love with my job. It’s absolutely one of the best jobs I’ve ever had. I really like helping people and I like being in a situation where I’m forced to push my own physical envelope, like when I’m doing a rescue in big surf. I like to be scared. But it’s really challenging to be really scared and not be able to show it. You don’t want the person that’s really in trouble to know that you are scared because it doesn’t help them. They are usually tired and panicky and you need to come across as professional as you can. How do you prepare yourselves for these types of situations? Colleta: We stay in shape and this makes our job easier doing rescues. I jog, surf, bodysurf and skateboard a lot so that

These waves want to kill you. They want to crush you. And that’s just the ocean. And you

respect

their

power and the fact that you don’t have that kind of power. keeps me pretty active. Gallagher: Physical stamina is definitely a priority. This job demands the discipline of staying in top physical shape. We are the only civil servants who are put to a physical test each year. Colleta: A lot of the big wave surfers say they are in their top physical shape in their 40s. So I look at what I’m doing now and figure I’ll probably be in my top physical shape when I’m 44! [David strikes a pose and shows off his fine form at 52.] Okay, boys, let’s keep this PG-13. Tell me about your scariest moment as a lifeguard.

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Gallagher: My scariest moment? It was actually breaking up a fight. What some people don’t realize is that we don’t just deal with the ocean. Colleta: Domestic violence, drug addicts, fights… Gallagher: Theft, you name it. If it happens in a public park, we respond. We are the representatives of the county. Colleta: We are the first ones on any scene, whether it’s a drowning, a cardiac on the beach, a fight in the park or on the beach. We see the initial problem. Then we get our back-up. We work as a team with firefighters, paramedics and police officers. There are some really amazing guys that work in this county. Let’s talk shark sightings for a moment. I’ve spent many hours dangling my toes in the waters of Kanaha, just wondering how you guys know where the sharks are? Gallagher: Because Kanaha is close to the airport, we get pilots flying over who see big, big, big sharks out on the reef. They will call into the tower, “Hey there is an 18-foot tiger out here. Or, there’s a 15foot hammerhead out here!” Then the tower will call 911 and, because we are on the 911 system, 911 will call us. I know that you post signs to inform the public. But what about divers who may already be out there? When divers have their tako and bleeding fish in a net, it’s like a calling card to

sharks that are out there feeding. So we go out there and pick divers up. That can be a bit tricky during low tide because you don’t know where that shark is. But you know one thing—that guy has speared a fish and it’s your responsibility to take care of everybody in the water. I feel good about this because I’ve been a diver, and because the old tradition of Hawaii is diving. It’s noble. It’s what Hawaii is really about. Surfing and fishing—those are the things that make us special in Hawaii so it makes me feel good to protect those people. That the job I’m doing is something worth doing. Gallagher: Tony, let me ask you this. Why do you like working where you work? Colleta: For one, I live on the North Shore. I do everything on the North Shore. If I can live and work and do all my activities within a few miles, what a perfect lifestyle that is. I surf, fish and bodysurf all within two miles of my house. The North Shore is a lot cooler. It’s not as populated. It’s just North Shore living. It’s a good way. I like a simple life. I like gardening, surfing, skateboarding and walking my dogs with my beautiful wife. That’s what I like to do. I also enjoy the North Shore community. The people on the North Shore are cool. The whole atmosphere makes for a good place to work. And, I get to work with guys who were born and raised on the North Shore. I did

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Opihi than by anything else. People cut them off rocks with a knife and turn their backs on the ocean. Then they get hit by an ocean surge and it pulls them off the rocks. Gallagher: We have a saying here in Hawaii: “Never turn your back on the ocean. It’s disrespectful.” Tony, I think it’s your turn to ask David a question. Turn around is fair play. Colleta: Tell us, who is David Gallagher? Gallagher: I came to Maui in 1973 from Mendocino. I was a very serious street evangelist at the time. While in the Christian ministry, I had three dreams in a row and they all said the same thing to me. “You are not going to be a street preacher in New York City, you are going to go to Hawaii.” I decided to drop all the Christianity and get into making people laugh and playing music. Because nothing serves better than making people laugh. I’ve had a second job as an entertainer ever since. Before I was a lifeguard, I was a dive instructor. Two lifeguards said to me, “Gallagher, with all the rescues you do out in the ocean, why don’t you become a lifeguard? You’re a waterman.” I said, good idea! I was accepted as a lifeguard on Maui in 1994. If you like to help other people, this is the job. It’s a lifestyle, not a business. Colleta: It’s the best job in the entire world. Gallagher: It’s the best job in the entire world short of my other job as a singer/comedian/piano player. Colleta: Or dancing at bachelorette parties? I’m getting a visual. Well, I have to say that you two seem to have fun together. Gallagher: Yeah, Tony and I work pretty well together. Tony is funny. He’s an intelligent guy who laughs at my jokes. Colleta: I’m a real polite guy. MTW

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all of my training through Maui County and learned a lot from them. But I learn so much firsthand from guys who have spent all of their lives in these waters right here. Gallagher: I grew up here from the age of 19. I’m 52 now. So I’ve spent most of my life here. And as a local haole guy, I’m always learning from the people of this island. They are so right on and have so much to share with us. They have so much good mana. A friend of mine used to wait tables in Ka’anapali. He told me that a tourist once pointed at Lanai and asked him if it was Japan. You deal with a lot of tourists—can you top that one? Colleta: The most unusual question I’ve ever been asked? “Is there water around the whole island?” was one of the best ones. “Are there sharks out there?” was another good one. Gallagher: I’ve got a couple more. One tourist asked, “What’s the elevation here?” I answered, “Ma’am it’s sea level.” Then there’s the occasional, “What island are we on?” I say, “Catalina.” Just kidding. Another favorite question we get a lot is “Are there sharks out there and should we be afraid of them?” I joke, “There are hammerheads, but I’m more concerned about the knuckleheads on shore.” Colleta: That’s what I always say. It’s more dangerous to drive. Gallagher: We have so much water activity that actually the predators out there are smart enough to distinguish between windsurfers, kite surfers and turtles. We have such rare incidents where sharks are being active in our waters. There is so much food for them out there they have no interest in the taste of rayon, styrofoam or human flesh. Statistically, the most dangerous animal in the ocean is the Opihi, the little abalone crustaceans that live on the rocks. Colleta: More people are killed by

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Gambling with Guacamole The expanding Fiesta Time empire The whole world was gray. A steady rain was falling and it was actually chilly outside. My clothes were still wet after dashing in from the parking lot. Sitting by the window, wiping little droplets of water from my arms, I watched tourists clutching colorful umbrellas make their way through the downpour.

Fiesta Time 300 Ma’alaea Road, Ma’alaea, 244-5862. $

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I was sitting inside Fiesta Time, waiting for a hot plate of food. Not the little taqueria Fiesta Time in Wailuku, where you sit on plastic chairs set against a counter and eat your meals out of Styrofoam containers, but the new Fiesta Time in Ma’alaea. I was sipping a Coke and waiting for my lunch, sitting in a chair at a table—one of a dozen or so—in a dining room with restrooms, food runners and bright piñatas hanging from the ceiling. It was nice to be sitting inside a climate-controlled room, what with the late winter storm blowing outside. My table gave me a peerless view of not just the quaint Ma’alaea shops, but also the harbor itself. On a day when the weather was more pleasant, from here it would be possible to enjoy lunch while watching whales splashing about. But not that day—choppy seas and brisk wind kept the harbor quiet. Before I go any further, I should explain that I greeted my visit to this second Fiesta Time with great ambivalence. A longtime fan of the original Fiesta Time, I’d pretty much concluded that it served the allaround best Mexican food on the island. That it was also among the least expensive may have helped my enthusiasm. It’s not “authentic” Mexican food, but it doesn’t need to be. If it’s delicious, what difference does its pedigree make? Besides, honest connoisseurs will say you can’t get authentic Mexican

The patented Fiesta Time hand-off food anywhere but Mexico. The shacks and taquerias that spring up around California’s East L.A. and Santa Ana are closer, but still just reproductions. Any time my work took me to Wailuku, I’d duck into Fiesta Time for a plate of chicken tacos or enchiladas or even some of their guacamole tacos. It didn’t really matter, since they were all equally good and I was far more interested in getting a couple scoops of rice and beans. I don’t know how they get the rice that fluffy or how much lard they pour into the beans to make them that creamy, and I don’t want to know. That they’re available when I walk in the door is all that’s important.

Hence my trepidation when I first heard stories from my friends that Fiesta Time was opening a second location. And in Ma’alaea, no less—home to pricey, touristy establishments like the Blue Marlin Harbor Front Grill and Ma’alaea Grill. Dark thoughts began to creep into my head. After all, Fiesta Time was now spreading a small, family-run kitchen across the island. I’d watched too many restaurants try to expand, only to discover their quality diminish in direct proportion to the number of new locations. I also began worrying that Fiesta Time would dull the kick of their guacamole and the bite of their carnitas for less adventurous palates.

But I braved the rain and chill and stopped in. You still order at the counter, but now there’s a fish tank to hold your attention while waiting in line. I ordered a chicken burrito— thank God they come with rice and beans on the side—and took a seat by the window. A few minutes later the woman who took my order brought me my food, along with one of those trademark Fiesta Time salsa bowls. Taking a deep breath, I pulled a plastic knife and fork and some napkins from the small basket on the table and dug in. My fears were groundless. Everything was as it should be. No reason to worry, unless of course they decide to open a third… MTW

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Ale House - Wide selection of food with sports and games all around. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877–9001. $

International House of Pancakes - (IHOP)- Open for breakfast, specialty pancakes, sandwiches, along with lunch and dinner entrees. Maui Mall, Kahului, 871-4000. $

Aloha Grill - A large assortment of burgers with veggie styles and all the extras. 270 Dairy Road Marketplace, Kahului, 893–0263. $ Ba-Le - French-Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Plus, a large variety of tapioca. 270 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 8772400. $ Bangkok Cuisine - Casual setting featuring exceptional Thai food with plenty of crisp vegetables and fresh seafood. Lunch, dinner or take-out. 395 Dairy Road, Kahului, 893-0026. $ Biwon Restaurant - Fresh and flavorful, authentic Korean food. Open 10 a.m.-10 p.m., lunch and dinner. 752 Lower Main, Wailuku, 244-7788. $ Café Marc Aurel - Offers an elegantly casual menu, including gourmet cheeses, dolmas, tzatziki and an extensive wine-by-the-glass list. 28 N. Market Street, Wailuku, 244-0852. $$ Cupie’s Drive-In - Local lunch take-out. Open Monday through Saturday. 134 W Kamehameha Ave, Kahului, 877-3055. $ Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. 425 Koloa St., Kahului, 8717782. $ Denny’s - Open 24 hours, serving breakfast, lunch or dinner. Omelettes, burgers, salads. 430 Kele St., Kahului, 873-5550. $ Dragon Dragon Chinese Restaurant Excellent service and fair prices with dishes like Kung Pao Chicken, Crispy Gau Gee Mein and Honey Walnut Prawns. Maui Mall, Kahului, 8931628. $ Dish - The concept is simple. Every month, the owner and manager decide on a different “menu” of 14 entrees, of which you may select 12 to assemble in their kitchen. Sessions available Wed-Sat. 150 Hana Highway, Kahului, 8771414. $$

Little Ceasar Pizza Station - Specialty pizzas along with salads and sandwiches. Located inside of K-mart. 424 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1566. $ Koho Grill & Bar - Comfort food in a casual setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner Open daily at 7 a.m. 275 Kaahumanu Ave., Queen Kaahumanu Center, 8775588.

seafood Thai entrees in a casual garden setting. 2119 Vineyard, Wailuku, 244-1567. $$ Saigon Cafe - Wailuku’s hidden secret! Delicious and affordable Vietnamese cuisine with excellent service. 1792 Main, Wailuku, 243-9560. $$ Sam Sushi - A new location and with over 20 years of experience in the food industry. Catering and party trays available. Open Mon-Fri, 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sat, 5-9 p.m. 1951 E. Vineyard St., Wailuku, 249-2420. $$ Sandalwood Golf Course Restaurant - Lunch with a view, served from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. 2500 Honoapiilani Hwy, Waikapu, 242-6000. $$

Kozo Sushi - Fast food take out. Open 9 a.m to 7 p.m. Mon through Sat. Sushi platters available. 52 N. Market Place, Kahului, 243-5696. $

Sheik’s Restaurant - Local favorites including Loco Moco and Shoyu Chicken. 97 Wakea Ave, Kahului, 877-0121. $

Krispy Kreme - This place is known all over the world for its warm, tasty glazed doughnuts. 433 Kele St., Kahului, 893-0883. $

Simply Sweets Bakery - Delicious sweet and savory pastries, rolls, cakes, Mauisadas and deli sandwiches. Open Mon-Thu, 7 a.m.-5:30 p.m.; Fri, 7 a.m.6:30 p.m; Sat, 7 a.m.-4 p.m. 150 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 893-0700. $

Mama Ding’s Pasteles - This family owned resturant consist of a variety of breads, coconut papaya bread, apple cinnnamon, Puerto Rican sweet bread. Serving breakfast. Open 7 a.m. - 2 p.m.255 Alamaha, Kahului. 877-5796. $

Siu’s Chinese Kitchen - Fast food Chinese with daily specials. All entrees are served with rice or noodles. 70 E Kaaumanu Ave., Maui Mall, 871-0828. $ Squeaky’s Family Restaurant - “A Taste of Philadelphia” with real Philly cheesesteak, pan-fried trout, vegetarian meatloaf. Open for breakfast. 197 North Market Street, Wailuku, 244-4100. $ Stillwell’s Bakery & Cafe - Specialty cakes and desserts, breads and pastries, with sandwiches, salads and soups for lunch. Open 6 a.m.-4 p.m. Mon-Sat. 1740 Kaahumanu Ave, Wailuku, 243-2243. $ Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi! Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744. $ Sub Paradise - Maui’s famous subs since 1990. An extensive list of breakfast bagels, sub sandwiches and salads. Open Mon-Fri, 7 p.m.; Sat, 7 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sun, 7 a.m.-4 p.m. 395 E. Dairy Rd, Kahului, 877-8779. Takamiya Market - Plate lunches, homemade corned beef, sashimi, tossed salads. Catering and banquet facility. 359 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-3404. $ Tasty Crust - Local style cuisine for breakfast (try

Manaña Garage - Latin American cuisine with unique and colorful decor. Try the Chicken Tortilla Epozote, vegetarian enchilada and paella. Cool, quaint bar. 33 Lono St., Kahului, 873–0220. $$ Marco’s Grill Deli - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 444 Hana Hwy, Kahului, 877-4446. $$

NOT HING OVER

$1 2 95

Chef Mark Ellman’s

Maui Coffee Roasters - Ono grinds and freshly roasted coffee in a fun and casual atmosphere makes this the place to take five. 444 Hana Hwy, Kahului, 877–CUPS. $ Maui Beach Hotel - Buffet-style restaurant featuring different foods each night of the week. Features range from Shabu Shabu (tons of meat) to sushi and Japanese. 170 Ka’ahumanu Ave., Kahului, 877-0051. $$ Maui Mix Plate - Traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawaii home. 70 Ka’ahumanu Ave, Kahului, 877-0706. $ Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and island spices. 275 Kaahumanu Ave, Queen Kaahumanu Mall, Kahului, 871-7726. $

Dunes Restaurant - Adventuresome revisions of local and American breakfast, lunch and dinner favorites. Maui Lani Golf Course, Kahului, 877–7461. $$

Mike’s Restaurant - Authentic Chinese cooking and ono local grinds. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Also offer catering. 1900 E. Main St., Wailuku, 2447888. $

Fiesta Time - Superior Mexican taqueria. Order a la carte or combo special with the freshest ingredients. 1132 Lower Main, Wailuku, 249-8463. $

Piñata’s - Fresh and wholesome Mexican food from the kitchen sink burritos to quesadillas. Casual dining and various piñatas available. 395 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877–8707. $

Gardencafe (Brigit & Bernard's) - Oasis of cozy European and fresh island fish cuisine in the midst of the industrial zone. Lunch, dinner, catering. 335 Ho'ohana St., Kahului, 877-6000. $$

Pulehu BBQ - Local plate lunches with a Southern smokehouse twist. 1500 Lower Main St., Wailuku, 244-4049 or 244-6159. $

Ichiban Restaurant and Sushi Bar Breakfast, lunch and dinner featuring modestly priced Japanese and local cuisine. Kahului

Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.

Ruby’s - Walk down memory lane at this fabulous ‘50s cafe. Old time American dining morning to night. Queen Ka`ahumanu Center, Kahului, 248-7829. $ Saeng’s Thai Cuisine - Vegetarian, meat and

200 OFF

ANY POUND OF REGULAR PRICED COFFEE

Beer & Wine

with this coupon. expires 3/31/05

Pastas, Salads, Pizzas, Sandwiches and Nightly Seafood Specials

444 Hana Hwy. Kahului Corner of Dairy Rd. & Hana Hwy.

877–CUPS

WWW.HAWAIIANCOFFEE.COM

We now have Brown Rice Pasta! Wheat & Gluten Free! 50¢ extra / Cooked to order so it takes a few minutes longer

661-6633 • 180 Dickenson Street • Lahaina LETTERS

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MARCH 17, 2005

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

their famous hotcakes!), lunch and dinner. Serving Maui since 1944. 1770 Mill, Wailuku, 244-0845. $ Tiffany’s - Featuring 103 items of local and Asian entrees, Bento boxes, noodles and fish. Featuring DJ and Karaoke. Open 10:30-2 a.m. 1424 Lower Main St. Wailuku, 249-0052. $ Tin Ying Chinese Restaurant - A Hong Kong-style seafood restaurant. They have over 100 menu choices at reasonable prices. Buffet style lunch take-out, as well as sit down dining. 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-4371. $ Tokyo Tei - Lunch and dinner featuring teriyaki beef and fish, tempura, katsu, saimin and more. 1063 E. Lower Main St., Wailuku, 2429630. $ Valley Isle Seafood - Known for their luau stew, along with several choices of seafood. 475 Hukilike St., Kahului, 873-4847. $ Wei Wei BBQ & Noodle House - Very affordable Chinese cuisine, counter-service, delicious noodle dishes. 210 Imikala St., Wailuku, 242-7928. $ Wow-Wee Maui Cafe - Unique candy bars, ice cream shakes, bagels, coffees, sandwiches and soups. Also a Hawaiian menu, kava kava, sushi and oxygen bars. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1414. $

SOUTH MAUI Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Affordable takeout seafood, chicken, ribs—all deep fried tempura style or grilled. 1913 S Kihei Rd., 874-0788. $ Antonio’s - Italian cuisine in a cozy atmosphere, extensive wine list and friendly service. Trust me—try the Tiramisu. 1215 S. Kihei Rd., 875-8800. $$ Aroma D’Italia Ristorante - Southern Italian cuisine and full wine list at reasonable prices. Open Mon-Sat, 5-9 p.m. 1881 S Kihei Rd., 8790133. $$ Ashley’s South Shore Cafe - Affordable breakfast, lunch and dinner with burgers, local plates, fresh island fish, comfort foods and deli sandwiches. 362 Hukulii Pl. (behind Tesoro gas station), Kihei, 874-8600. $ BadaBing! - Home of the Rat Pack Bar. Pizzas, pastas and Italian specialties created with love and a little attitude. $10 wines and kids eat free on Monday and Saturday. Fuhgeddaboudit! 1945 S Kihei Rd., 875-0188. $$ Bamboo Chi - Euro, Asian and Mediterranean atmosphere—perfect for relaxing with friends. Pupus, tapas and antipasto. Live music Fri-Sat in the Wabi-Sabi Lounge. Dinner attire suggested. Open 5 p.m. 100 Wailea Ike Dr, Wailea, 8794777. $$ Beach ’n Bagels Cafe - Freshly made bagels, Sandwiches, salads, smoothies. Open for breakfast and lunch. 2395 S. Kihei Rd., Dolphin Plaza, Kihei, 875-7668. $ Big Wave Cafe - Small cafe serving Pacific Rim cuisine, including lobster and sweet corn fritter with furikake tartar sauce, and coconut shrimp with fruit salsa and ginger lilikoi sauce. Open daily. 1215 S Kihei Rd., 891-8688. $ Bistro Molokini - Blend of California and island cuisine, lunch and dinner. Poolside. Grand Wailea, 875-1234. $$ Bocalino Bistro & Bar - Affordably priced Mediterranean cuisine. Open for dinner. Late night menu served until 1 a.m. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 8749299. $$ Blue Marlin Harbor Front Grill & Bar - Get amazing seafood, steaks, sandwiches, pizza and sushi. Eat outdoors overlooking the Ma’alaea Fishing Fleet. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 2448844. $$ Buzz’s Warf - Steaks, seafood and more, including Sweet Paradise Prawns. Reservations recommended. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 2445426. $$ Cafe Kiowai - Authentic Japanese fare according to centuries-old tradition. Casual din-

MARCH 17, 2005

DINING

$$→$20-$40

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

ing in a relaxed garden setting. 5400 Makena Alanui, Maui Prince Hotel, 874--1111.$$ Caffe Ciao - Italian cuisine baked in a Kiawe wood oven. Open for lunch and dinner. Dine outdoors poolside. The Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 875-4100. $$ Capische? - Contemporary Italian with a twist and an extensive wine list. Commanding ocean views from every table. Wailea Diamond Resort, 879–2224. $$$ Cyberbean Internet Cafe - Gourmet coffee, espressos, cappucinos, lattes, sandwiches, smoothies and salads. 1881 S Kihei, 879-4799. $ Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. 2439 S Kihei Rd., 875-7782. $ Denny’s - Open 24 hours for breakfast, lunch or dinner with omelets, burgers, salads. 2763 S. Kihei Rd., 879-8600. $ Enrique’s Restaurant - Authentic Mexican food. Fajitas, seafood, enchiladas, tamales, burritos and vegetarian items. Open Mon-Sat, 10 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sun, 10 a.m.-8 p.m. 2395 S. Kihei Rd., 875-2910. $ Fernando’s - Authentic Mexican food. Open 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. daily. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 879-9952. $ Ferraro’s - Gourmet Italian cuisine oceanfront with live violin and guitar, outdoor kiawe-wood-burning oven, all-day lunches and cucina rustica dinners. Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000. $$$ Fiesta Time - Superior Mexican taqueria. Order a la carte or combo special with the freshest ingredients. 300 Ma’alaea Rd., Ma’alaea, 244-5862. $ Five Palms Restaurant - Local produce and fish featuring Pacific Rim seafood. Breakfast, lunch, pupus and dinner. Open 8 a.m.-9 p.m. 2960 S. Kihei Rd., 879–2607. $$ Harry’s Sushi Bar - Japanese cuisine with fresh and delicious sushi. Open 5 p.m.-12 a.m. 100 Ike Drive, Wailea, 879-7677. $$ Horhitos Mexican Cantina - Burritos, salads, appetizer and “food for gringos,” too. Located next to Hapa’s Nightclub. Open 5 p.m. to 2 a.m. Mon.-Sat. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 891-MEXI. $ Hula Moon - Enjoy breakfast, lunch, dinner or a champagne Sunday brunch with an open air tropical setting and spectacular ocean views. Featuring fresh Hawaiian fish. 3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-7831. $$$ Humuhumunukunukuapua’a - Hawaiian and Polynesian cuisine oceanside. Grand Wailea Resort, 875-1234 ext. 4900. $$$ Jawz Tacos - Island-style tacos and burritos, including choice of vegetarian, mahi mahi, ono, shrimp, chicken or steak. Impressive salsa bar and the taco salads are da bomb! 1280 S Kihei Rd., 874-TACO. $ Joy’s Place - “Smart eating” featuring organic foods which are low fat, low salt and wheat free. Open Mon thru Sat, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. 1993 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9258. $ Kai Ku Ono - A tapas-style menu, where everything is a la carte, special late night menu and sushi. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner with bar and lounge area. 2511 S Kihei Rd., 875–1007. $$ Kihei Caffe - Affordable breakfast and lunch with lanai seating, hearty portions, tasty sandwiches, huli chicken and fresh fish. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., 879-2230. $ Life’s a Beach - Food and drinks in a fun atmosphere. Nachos, burritos, prime rib and grilled mahi mahi and lunch specials. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., 891–8010. $ Lobster Cove - Seafood, steak and lobster at its best in a relaxed and casual atmosphere. Open 5 p.m. to midnight daily. 100 Ike Dr., Wailea, 879–7677. $$$ Longhi’s Wailea - Seafood, meat and pasta entrees with many not listed on the menu. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891–8883. $$$ LuLu’s - Ribs, burgers, chicken wings, Black ‘n Blue Ahi and more in a fun, upbeat tiki-fied atmosphere with a huge bar and open-air deck. 1941 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9944. $ Ma`alaea Grill - Reasonably priced fine dining overlooking the harbor from the Maui Ocean Center. Ma`alaea Harbor Village, 243–2206. $$ Ma’alaea Waterfront Restaurant - Seafood and Continental cuisine. Open for dinner daily from 5 p.m. Milowai Condominium, 50 Hauoli St., 244-9028. $$

Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.

Marco’s South Side Grill - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 1445 S Kihei Rd., 874–4041. $$ Maui Espresso & Shave Ice - Finest Hawaiian shave ice, a full service coffee kiosk, fruit smoothies and shakes. 2439 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0414. $ Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and spices from the islands. 2411 S. Kihei Road, Kamaole Beach Center, 879-5005. $ Mulligan’s On the Blue - Maui’s authentic Irish pub, plenty o’Irish food, whiskey and beer. Breakfast served till 3 p.m 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874–1131. $ Nick’s Fishmarket - Fine dining in open air and elegance with amazing seafood dishes and fresh fish. Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 879–7224. $$$ OutBack Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimp-onthe-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in a casual and lively atmosphere. Open 4-10 p.m. 281 Pi’ikea Ave, Kihei 879-8400. $$ Pita Paradise - Good food served fast. Serving up a mean Mediterranean-style “gyro,” salads and wraps, with outdoor lanai. Kihei Kalama Village Center, 875–7679. $ Royal Thai Cuisine - Thai food with a large selection of vegetarian dishes. Open for lunch (Mon-Fri) and dinner (nightly). 1280 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0813. $ Roy’s Bar & Grill - Mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious and upbeat atmosphere. Open nightly from 5:30 to 10 p.m. Fine dining, reservations recommended. Piilani Shopping Center, 303 Piikea Ave., Kihei, 891-1120. $$$ Sansei Restaurant - Japanese-based Pacific Rim dining, sushi bar and late night menu. Award-winning cuisine, early bird and late night special. 1881 S. Kihei Rd., 879–0004. $$ K Sarento’s on the Beach - Contemporary dining near the water’s edge. Italian cuisine, very romantic. Private VIP table available. 2980 S. Kihei Rd., 875–7555. $$$ Seawatch - Hawaii regional cuisine utilizing the freshest island fish and produce. Open for breakfast and lunch 8 a.m to 3 p.m, dinner 5:30 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Drive, Wailea, 875-8080. $$

fast, lunch and dinner. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8860. $$$ Stella Blues Cafe - Healthy, quality food in a casual, homestyle setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner with daily specials. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 874-3779. $$ South Shore Tiki Lounge - Killer burgers, sausage sandwiches, mai-tais and pizza. Awesome outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. Open 11 a.m.-2 a.m., serving food 'till midnight! Kihei Kalama Village, 874-6444. $ Sports Page Bar & Grill - Over 100 menu items, including half-pound burgers and deli sandwiches, with 24 TVs and a full bar. Open 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 2411 S. Kihei Rd, 879-0602. $ Sunset Mixed Grill - Local, Japanese and Chinese cusine, along with some Korean dishes. Entrees come with two side dishes. Open 10 a.m.-9 p.m. BYOB. 2395 S. Kihei Rd. 891-1991. $ Tastings Wine Bar & Grill - Savory and sweet nibbles, such as house smoked duck breast on wilted spinach with toasted hazelnuts, grilled whole Moi with jasmine rice and ginger braised bok choy, along with an excellent wine list. Open Tu-Su 5 p.m. 1913 South Kihei Rd. Khei. 879-8711. $$ Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Cafe - Relaxed island luxury in ambience and cuisine, with ocean views and live music. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. $$ Tony Roma’s - Famous for ribs, barbequed chicken and onion ring loaf, along with daily special. 1819 S. Kihei Road, 875-1104. $$ Vietnamese Cuisine - Hawaiian Opakapaka filet, soft shell crab, New York steak. Open 10:30 a.m-9:30 p.m. Azeka Place I, Kihei, 875-2088. $$ Yorman’s By The Sea - Southern Pacific Cusine with a blend of Louisiana Cajun and tropical flare. Open 5-10 pm. Music nightly. 760 S. Kihei Rd, Kihei 874-8385. $$ K

UPCOUNTRY Anthony’s Coffee Company - A full espresso bar, hot and cold sandwiches, ice cream. Make sure to stop in for a great box lunch to go! 90 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-8340. $

Shabu Shabu Toji - Healthy and delicious Japanese style fondue. Beef, pork or seafood, and veggies. Open for lunch Wed-Fri; dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. nightly. 1280 S. Kihei Rd., 875-8366. $

Aha’Aina - Ocean front dinning Featuring a delicious chili pork burrito and a large variety of omelets. Island fish, chicken Katsu. Open for breakfast and lunch only Tues - Sat 7a.m. - 2 p.m. Sun 7 a.m. -1 p.m. 7 Aewa Place, Pukalani, 572-2395. $$

Spago - Gourmet cuisine as presented by worldfamous chef-owner Wolfgang Puck. Oceanfront dining at its finest! Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000. $$$

Café 808 - Local diner style serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open daily from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. 4566 Lower Kula Rd., Kula, 878-6874. $

Spices - Steak, seafood and more! Open for break-

I s l a n d Ta c o Fresh Fish Chicken or Pork Tacos OPEN Mon.-Sat. 11am-3am Sun. Sunset-2am

LOCATED AT PARADICE BLUZ ON FRONT STREET

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

$$→$20-$40

Cafe Del Sol - Sandwiches and fresh fish, daily special. Open for breakfast and lunch. 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. 3620 Baldwin Ave, Makowa 5724877. $ Café Des Amis - Charming cafe with delicious sweet and savory crepes and Mediterranean fare. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 5796323. $ Café Mambo - International bistro featuring Mediterranean and Mexican cuisine with Moorish influences. 30 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 5798021. $

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

Jacque’s Northshore Bistro - Tropical yet festive atmosphere, with a sushi bar, indoor and lanai dining. 120 Hana Hwy, Pa`ia, 579–8844. $$ Jameson’s Grill & Bar - Featuring fine steaks, fresh local fish and seafood, and of course, baked artichoke. 200 Kapalua Dr., Kapalua, 669-5653. $$$ Kimura Saimin Shop - Casual atmosphere, simple, affordable menu with fresh ingredients done right! 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-5228. $

Cakewalk Paia Bakery - High quality baked goods, sandwiches and specialty cakes. 100 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8770. $

Kitada’s - Saimin for breakfast is a standard. Teriyaki beef, hamburger steak, tofu and teriyaki all available. 3617 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 572–7241. $

Casanova - First class service, first class food. Fine Italian dining at night and Makawao’s favorite deli by day. 1188 Makawao Ave., 572–0220. $$

Kula Lodge & Restaurant - Upcountry’s familystyle restaurant with sweeping views of the island. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Haleakala Highway, 878-1535. $

Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon Hankering for some grub? Charley’s serves it hearty and healthy from breakfast to dinner and beyond. 142 Hana Hwy., Pa`ia, 579–9453. $ K

La Provence - French-style bistro and patisserie with lanai, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open Wed thru Sun, 8:30 a.m. to 9 p.m. 3158 Lower Kula Rd., 878-1313. $$

Colleen’s - 1940’s style urban bistro serving breakfast, lunch and dinner from 6 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. daily. Haiku Cannery, 575-9211. $$

Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Sun thru Thu; 6 a.m. to midnight Fri and Sat. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. $

Fresh Mint - Vietnamese vegetarian cuisine including Summer Rolls, Spicy Lemongrass Soup and Soy Fish in Clay Pot. Open daily 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Catering and take-out available. 115 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9144. $ Hali`imaile General Store - Gourmet dining in a charming atmosphere with food from Chef Beverly Gannon’s award-winning menu. 900 Hali`imaile Rd, 572–2666. $ Hana Hou Cafe - Hawaiian homestyle cooking with aloha-filled ambience and local musicians. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-2661. $

favorites. 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani Square, 5732998. $ Milagros Food Co. - South American cuisine with an island influence. Best people watching spot in Paìa! Extensive tequila menu and delicious daily special. 3 Baldwin St., Paia, 579–8755. $ Moana Bakery & Cafe - Pacific Rim dining for vegetarians and meat eaters. Bakery provides wonderful goodies for the sweet tooth. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paìa, 579–9999. $ Paìa Fish Market - By serving fresh local Hawaiian fish daily, they are the hot spot for seafood lovers without the upscale pocket. 2A Baldwin Ave., Paìa, 579–8030. $ Pauwela Cafe & Bakery - Healthy, low fat deli cuisine and daily fresh baked goods. Open 7 a.m.- 2:30 p.m. 375 West Kuiaha Road Unit 37 Haiku. 575-9242 $ Polli’s Mexican Restaurant - Paniolo country’s premier Mexican cantina, with nachos, burritos, ensaladas and more! 1202 Makawao Ave., 572-7808. $ SandBar & Grill - Casual contemporary island cuisine, featuring salads, kiawe grill burgers, sandwiches and lobster tacos. Full bar, happy hour everyday 4-6 p.m. Open daily from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 89 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-8742. $ Vasi Gourmet - The best cakes and pastries around, along with delicious salads, quiches and gyros with a variety of teas. Open 7 a.m.-8 p.m. 810 Kokomo Road, Haiku Marketplace, 575-9588. $ Veg Out - Vegan and vegetarian food, from Mexican, Italian and Far East influences. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-5320. $

Island Tacos - Taco stand with fresh, made-to-order fish, beef and chicken tacos. Daily from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery. $

Lynne’s Cafe - Affordable homestyle local food including breakfast, plate lunch, chow fun and more! Catering available. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-9363. $ Makawao Steak House - Classic and comfortable menu with daily fish preparations and salad bar. 3612 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 572-8711. $$

WEST MAUI

Mama’s Fish House - Fresh island fish with fresh local ingredients at “Maui’s favorite restaurant.” 799 Poho Pl., Kuau, 579–8448. $$$

A&J Kitchen, Deli & Bakery - Choose from American, Hawaiian, Korean and Chinese cuisines. Bakery with cakes and cookies. Lahaina Center, 667–0623. $

Maui’s Best Tamales & Local Food - Authentic, fresh and tasty Mexican cuisine along with local

Happy Hour Daily From 2-5 PM

$2.50 Well Drinks $3.50 Margaritas $1.50 Bud Lights

Homemade Italian Cuisine

opopopopopopopopop

Made from Scratch Ravioli Lasagna Meatballs Osso Buco Tiramisu

Watch Your Favorite Sports On Our New Bar T.V.s

Fridays

2. Mai Tais 16. Prime Rib Nite $

Wednesdays

Open Tuesdays thru Sundays 5pm - 9pm

1215 S. Kihei Rd. (Long’s Ctr.) • 875-8800

Variety Is Our Specialty

2511 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei • 879-1954

YOUR KITCHEN AWAY FROM HOME HAPPY HOUR EVERY DAY! from 12 to 3pm and 9 to11pm

874-TACOS

1279 S. Kihei Rd. (Next to Bank of Hawaii) Azeka Mauka

BUY 1 ENTREE GET SECOND ENTREE

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A TASTE OF LAHAINA WINNER FOR 4 CONSECUTIVE YEARS “BEST VEGETARIAN” “BEST MEAT” “BEST APPETIZER” & “BEST SEAFOOD”

505 FRONT STREET, 661–8112

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EMPLOYEE OF THE

WEEK AS TOLD TO REESE QUICK

Mark Powers Geraghty Barista, Starbucks in Lahaina You probably know me already—the guy dancing his way through making your morning cup of joe. I came to Maui as a graduation present after getting my degree in performance art on the East Coast. When I called my parents to tell them how vacation was going they said, “By the way Mark, if you decide to stay, it’s okay with us.” And I did. In addition to Maui’s beauty, the lifestyle is so slow and relaxed. In Baltimore everything seems like it’s about time and competition. I’d been staying in Haiku for three weeks last May when I decided to go to a full moon party. A moonlit hike sounded like a good idea at the time, but I ended up falling off a cliff and lying paralyzed on the ground for about three hours before some hikers found me and called 911. The next few months were a blur of hospitals, surgeries and casts. I had to go back to the mainland. The doctors told me that most people would have died or at least been paralyzed in this situation, but I kept it out of my mind and pushed through. My family was with me the whole time. I think they took it harder than I did, but they knew I was a trooper. All we could do was hope. It was all so surreal and scary, but that’s the way life is supposed to be. After about four months, I was ready to come back to the island. My parents were a little worried but they were happy that I was living my life. When I came back I got a job at—you guessed it—Starbuck’s. I’ve been with the company for about four years, but the Lahaina store is totally different. It’s smaller and slower. I love making coffee and I love the community it creates. Coffee brings people together. My coworkers are great and so is my boss. Everyone’s friendly and outgoing and no one stresses out too much. For now I’m just kicking back and finally singing and dancing again. As long as I can do that I’ll be loving life. I plan on traveling anywhere and everywhere and in the meantime, making a gazillion coffees to help start your day. MTW

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

$$→$20-$40

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

Lahaina, 661–0937. $$

Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Seafood, chicken, ribs, deep fried tempura style or grilled. Great food great prices. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, 667-9009. $

Captain Dave Fish & Chips - Classic baskets of fish and chips. Open daily. 126 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-6700. $

Aloha Mixed Plate - Experience the traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawaii home. 1285 Front St., Lahaina, 661-3322. $

Castaway Cafe - Beachside, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Soups, salads, pasta. Maui Kaanapali Villas & Resort, 661-9091. $

Athens Greek Restaurant - Affordable and authentic gyros, shish kebab, falafel and more. Ya’Sou! Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-4300. $

Cilantro - Fresh Mexican Grill island fish, tacos and burritos. Mexican food beyond the border. 170 Papalaua St., Lahaina, 667-5444. $

The Bakery - Freshly baked breads and pastries. Soup and sandwiches available. 991 Limahana Pl., Lahaina, 667-9062. $

Chez Paul Restaurant - Fine dining French cuisine, open for dinner only. Romantic setting. Call for reservations. 820 Olowalu Rd., Olowalu, 661-3843. $$$ K

Ba-Le - French Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Wide variety of tapioca. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-5566. $

China Boat - The best Mandarin Szechwan cuisine on Maui, open for lunch and dinner. 4474 L. Honoapiilani Road, Kahana Gateway Shopping Center, 669-5089. $

Bamboo Bar & Grill - Vietnamese, Thai and Japanese sushi. Delivery available, great daily special. Open late with full bar, pool tables. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4051. $ K Banyan Tree - “Eclectic Pacific cuisine with a Hawaiian twist.” Lodge atmosphere, ocean views. Ritz Carlton Kapalua, 669–6200. $$$ Basil Tomato’s Italian Grill - Specializing in Northern Italian cuisine. Come in for the ambience, stay for the delightful dining experience. 2780 Kekaa Dr., Kaanapali, 662-3210. $$ BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Deep-dish specialty pizzas and homemade Pizookies with live music nightly. Overlooking Lahaina Town with ocean view. 730 Front St., 661-0700. $ Blue Lagoon - Casual dining with local grinds and bar, surrounded by waterfalls and palm trees. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661–8141. $ Breakwall Cafe - Serving breakfast, coffee, sandwiches, salads, smoothies. Open everyday 7 a.m.-2 p.m. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-7220. $ Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. - Fine Southern foods, with “Forrest Gump” movie memorabilia and logo wear in a lively, casual atmosphere. 889 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3111. $$ Cafe O’Lei - Oceanfront dining featuring light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunch and dinner. Delicious salads and Focaccia sandwiches. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661–9491. $$ Cafe Sauvage - Gourmet, hearty, satisfying fare in an unpretentious setting. Extensive beer and wine menu, after-dinner cordials, and desserts! 844 Front St., Lahaina, 661–7600. $$ K Canoes - Casual yet elegant dining serving Polynesian style steaks, and seafood. Lunch 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m., dinner 5-9 p.m. 1450 Front St.,

CJ’s Deli & Diner - Reasonably priced comfort foods like Reuben sandwiches, pot roast, freshly baked pies and more. Open daily. 2580 Kekaa Dr., Fairway Shops, Kaanapali, 667-0968. $ Coconut Grove - Steak, seafood and other island favorites. Next to Lahaina Cannery Mall. Open 5:30-9 p.m. 1312 Front Street, Lahaina, 661-5648. Comercial Mexicana Store - Authentic Mexican food, Tamales, enchilads, tacos, soups, rice and beans Open everyday 10 a.m. - 9 p.m. 840 Wainee St E-9, Lahaina. 661-6193. $ Compadres Bar & Grill - Western cooking with a Mexican accent. Oceanview dining and Margarita bar. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-7189. $ Cool Cat Cafe - ‘50s-style diner with lanai. Delicious burgers and sandwiches, huge salads and fountain desserts. Lahaina Wharf Center, 667-0908. $ K Curry-In-A-Hurry - Curry dishes that are delightful and delicious in alternative vegetarian eating. Open Tue-Sat, 11:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, 661-4370. $ David Paul’s Lahaina Grill - Fine Pacific Rim cuisine in the intimate dining room on the ground floor of the Lahaina Inn. 127 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 667–5117. $$$ K Dollie’s Pub & Cafe - Pizza, sandwiches, salads and full bar. Open daily 11 a.m. to midnight. 4310 L. Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana Manor Shops, 669-0266. $ Feast At Lele - A royal tour of the cuisine of Polynesian sharing the spotlight with music and dance from four Pacific islands. 505 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-5353. $$$ Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie - Maui’s own restaurant brewery, with rotisserie grill, featuring steak, seafood and ambience. Also, late-night menu

served until 1:30 a.m.! 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana, 669-3474. $$ Gaby’s Pizzeria - Casual Italian dining with pizza and pasta from $6-$25. Open 11 a.m. to 12 a.m. daily. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8112. $ Gazebo Restaurant - Full breakfast and lunch menu, casual atmosphere and beautiful oceanside setting. 5315 Lower Honoapiilani Rd, Napili, 669-5621. $ Gerard’s - Fine French dining in downtown Lahaina. Rich, flavorful yet light foods await your taste buds. 174 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 661–8939. $$$ Giovani’s Tomato Pie Ristorante - Fine Italian dining located. Open for dinner. 2291 Kaanapali Prkwy, 661-3160. $$ Hard Rock Cafe - Good American food at decent prices amongst rock ‘n roll memorabilia. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667–7400. $ Hawaiian Village Coffee - Old-Hawaiian styled coffeehouse with pastries, smoothies, salads and sandwiches, quiche. Open 5:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. daily. 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana Gateway Shopping Center, 665-1114. $ Hecocks - Italian restaurant and cocktail lounge oceanside. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8810. $$ K House of Saimin - Ono homemade saimin, chicken sticks, and Haupia pie are just some of the local favorites here. Old Lahaina Center, 667–7572. $ Hula Grill - Barefoot bar and beachside dining, 1940s style. Menu is a seafood lovers’ delight. Whaler’s Village, Kaanapali, 667–6636. $$ i`o - Pacific Rim cuisine among awesome sunset views, and indoor or outdoor dining. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661–8422. $$$ Island Taco - The best soft shell tacos ever! Beef, fish, pork or chicken, served with black beans, fresh cabbage, cheese, onions and jalapenos. Open very late night, next to Paradice Bluz. 744 Luakini St., Lahaina. $ Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Coffee bar and cafe with great food, eclectic atmosphere, lounge ambience. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787. $ Jonny’s Burger Joint - Great burgers, as well as Mexican food, salads and fried items, served until midnight, with bar and pool table. 2395 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kaanapali, 661-4500. $ Kahuna Kabob - Healthy food, low prices! Soups, brown rice, veggies and kabobs And they deliver. Lahaina Marketplace, 661–9999. $ K Kimo’s - Fresh fish, prime rib, and their famous Hula Pie, oceanside dining. Live entertainment daily. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661–4811. $$

Kobe - Japanese Steak House and Oku’s Sushi Bar, featuring teppanyaki cooking and fabulous sushi. Dinner nightly from 5:30-10 p.m., Sushi 5:30-11:30 p.m. 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 667-5555. $$ Lahaina Coolers - Off the beaten path surf bistro. Good food, good quality, late night menu. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–7082. $ Lahaina Fish Co. - Chef’s signature Pacific Rim specialties prepared with fresh island fish. Dine on the oceanside lanai. 831 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3472. $$ Leilani’s On The Beach - Relaxed beachfront dining, specializing in fresh seafood and Pacific Rim cuisine. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-4495. $$ Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Mon-Sun 612 Front St. Lahaina 661-4213. $ Longhi’s - Elegant fine dining, freshest ingredients, pasta, seafood and steaks. 888 Front St., Lahaina, 667–2288. $$$ Ma La - Ocean front dinning Organic whole grains cusine, from clams, lobster soup, to chicken tikka, beet & goat cheese salads.Full bar 1307 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-9394. $$ Mama’s Ribs & Rotisserie - Serving ribs and roasted chicken, BBQ baked beans, coleslaw and macaroni salad. Napili Plaza, 665–6262. $ Mango Cafe - Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. American cusine, along with some local favorites. Full bar Nightly specials. 7:30 am - 10 pm. 2290 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-1929. $$ K Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and spices from the islands. Lahaina Square, 661-8883; Napili Square, 665-0222. $ Moose McGillycuddy’s - Great value, large portions, all you can eat specials, merry atmosphere and a large bar. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758. $ Mr. Sub Sandwiches - Specialty sandwiches made to order, with salads and homemade soups. 129 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-5683. $ Nachos Grande - Fresh Mexican food, fast. Vegetarian, too. Honokowai Marketplace, 662–0890. $ Nalu Sunset Bar & Sushi - Sushi rolls, sashimi, various Japanese appetizer, sandwiches and more. Maui Marriott, Kaanapali, 667-1200 ext. 51. $$ Okazuya Deli - Quality Japanese plate lunch. The best lemon caper mahi mahi and Okinawan potato tempura ever! Open 10 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. and 4:30 to 9 p.m. 3600 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Honokowai, 665-0512. $ Ono’s Surf Bar & Grill - Casual poolside dining. Now featuring reasonably priced tapas-Hawaiian style

Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner Open Daily: 7:30am - 1am Dinner Served 5pm - 10pm Full Bar - Late Night 10pm - close

Homestyle New American Comfort Food Vegetarian Selections

Locally Raised Grass Fed Beef

Fresh Local Fish

Homemade Desserts

WHERE PEOPLE & FOOD OF GOOD TASTE COME TOGETHER! In Our New Location - Azeka II - 874-3779 18

MARCH 17, 2005

DINING

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

$$→$20-$40

menu for dinner. 6:30 a.m.-10 p.m. The Westin Maui, Ka’anapali, 667-2525. $ Outback Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimpon-the-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in a casual and lively atmosphere. Open 4-10 p.m. nightly. 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kahana, 665-1822. $$ Pacific’O - Elegant oceanfront award-winning contemporary Pacific cuisine. Live jazz on weekends. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4341. $$$ Penne Pasta - Mark Ellman’s inexpensive Italian bistro with homestyle pasta, pizza and salad. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–6633. $ Pho Saigon 808 - Vietnamese cuisine, Saigon steaks, vegetarian delight. Open 7 days a week. 658 Front St., Wharf Cinema Center, 661-6628. $ Pioneer Inn - Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily, with live entertainment nightly. 659 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. $ Pad Thai - Delicious Påd Thai, among many other items. Open daily. 658 Front St., Lahaina, $ Pizza Paradiso - Award-winning pasta dishes, toss-to-order salads, big fat Greek gyros, home-

$$$→$40 and up

made tiramisu and panna Marketplace, 667-2929. $

cotta.

K→Kama’aina Discount

Honokowai

Plantation House Restaurant - HawaiianMediterranean cuisine. Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily. 2000 Plantation Club Dr., Kapalua, 669-6299. $ Reilley’s - Known for their choice award-winning beef. Gourmet steaks and seafood. Open at 5:30 p.m. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Kahana, 667-7477. $$$ Roy’s Bar & Grill - This fine dining restaurant has mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious upbeat atmosphere. Open nightly from 5:30-10 p.m. 4405 Honoapi’ilani Hwy., Kahana, 669-6999. $$$ Rusty Harpoon Restaurant and Tavern Quench thirst, satiate hunger and watch sports. Large parties welcome. Whalers Village, Kaanapali, 661–3123. $$ Ruth’s Chris Steak House - USDA prime steak and fine wines. Dinner served nightly. 5-10 p.m. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8815. $$$ Sansei Seafood Restaurant and Sushi Bar D.K. Kodama has combined the highest quality sushi bar infused with Hawaii’s cultural flavors. 115 Bay

Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.

Drive, Kapalua, 669–6286. $$ K Sea House Restaurant - Looking out over incredible Napili Bay, dining is an amazing experience here under the direction of Chef Michael Gallagher. 5900 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Hwy., Napili, 669–1500. $$ Smoke House - Delicious barbeque, ribs, chicken, sandwiches and hamburgers along with a full bar. Open 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m. 927 Wainee St., Lahaina, 667-7005. $ Spats Trattoria - Step into old Northern Italy. Tables are private and the antipasto serves two. Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali, 667–4727. $$$ Sports Club Kahana Grill - Upscale, healthy restaurant inside Sports Club Kahana. Breakfast, lunch and takeout. 4327 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Rd., Kahana, 669-3539. $$ Sunrise Cafe - Casual and cozy outdoor lanai, serving American food from 6 a.m. to 4 p.m. daily. 693 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8558. $ Swan Court - One of the top 10 romantic restaurants in the world, with an extensive list of contemporary fine wines. Hyatt Regency, Ka’anapali, 667–4727. $$$

Take Sushi - Open late night for late night sushi lovers. Full menu and daily special. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4051. $ Terrace Restaurant - Open from 6:30-11 a.m. serving breakfast only. Elegant dining, buffet-style rotating menu ranging from “Breakfast on the Farm” to “Hawaiian Plantation-Style Breakfast.” Ritz Carlton, Kapalua, 669-6200. $$$ Thai Chef - Thai food like you’ve never had it, with curry, Pad Thai, summer rolls and more. Old Lahaina Center, 667–2814. $ Tropica - Oceanfront dining on Ka’anapali Beach, features sizzling steaks, fresh fish, prepared in variety of styles. Specialty entrees, appetizers and deserts. Open 5:30-9:30 p.m. Westin Kaanapali, 667–2525. $$ Vino - Comfort and contemporary cuisine featuring fresh pasta and an extensive wine list. Open for dinner nightly from 5:30 p.m. Village Course Clubhouse, Kapalua, 661-8466. $$$ Vinny’s Pizza - Authentic New York style pizza, calzones and heros. Open daily, delivery 11 a.m.-10 p.m. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, Lahaina, 661-6773. $

Se Now rv ing

It’s time once again for Maui Time Weekly’s annual one-of-a-kind Food Issue. You know, it’s our special issue that deals with the important subject of food. After all, studies have shown that at least 98 percent of the population needs food to live, and we would be remiss in our duties as Maui’s source for comprehensive news, arts and entertainment if we didn’t reach that important demographic. Alone among the island’s publications, the Maui Time Weekly Food Issue will connect your business to Maui’s active locals and discriminating visitors.

h t 8 1 h arc M : e n li d a e th D 4 2 g n h i c s i r Advert blishes: Ma Pu For advertising rates & information call Brad at 283-3260 or Tommy at 283-0512 LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

2002 BMW X5

Auto, AC, Leather, Moonroof, Roof Rack, CD player, Traction Control, The Ultimate Driving Machine! #C6621, lic#MMY003

$39,988

2003 Toyota Celica GTS

VALUE CENTER SPECIALS

’94 MITSUBISHI MIRAGE ES AUTO, AM/FM/CD, #C6518, MKV 492 ’89 HONDA PRELUDE SILVER BLUE FINISH, LOW MILES, LIKE NEW, #C6656 ’95 MAZDA PROTE´GE´ AUTO, AC, PWR. PKG., #C6659, MLU 480 2004 Toyota Corolla

TRUCKS & SUV’S

Auto, AC, Pwr Winds, Pwr Door Locks, Cruise, Tilt, CD Player, Alloys, Rear Spoiler, Sporty Silver! #C6462, lic#MMT557

$17,288

2003 Toyota Rav 4

Auto, Moonroof, CD Player, Alloys, Roof rack, Sterling Silver! #C6573, lic# JYW014.

$19,988

$2,488

’01 FORD EXPLORER AM/FM/CASS/CD, ROOF RACK, #C6458, MHW 092 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$13,988 ’04 MAZDA B3000 AUTO, A/C, V6, #C6646, MMM 368 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$13,988 ’03 NISSAN XTERRA XE AUTO, 4X4, RAILS, ROOF RACKS #C6497, MKX 422 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$16,988 ’03 FORD RANGER XLT SUPERCAB AUTO, A/C, CD, PWR. PKG. ONLY 6K MILES, #C6614, MKT 587 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$17,488 ’04 FORD ESCAPE XLS V6, AM/FM/CD, LOADED, #C6411, MKX 120 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$18,988 ’02 FORD EXPLORER LIMITED LEATHER, MOONROOF, PWR SEATS, #C6502, MMT 546 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$19,988 ’03 FORD F-150 SUPER CAB XLT AM/FM/CD, TRITON V-8, CLEAN, #C6503, MMT-858 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$20,988 ’02 FORD EXPEDITION AUTO, A/C, PWR. PKG., #C6604, MMX 852 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .$21,988 ’03 LINCOLN NAVIGATOR Pwr. Moon Rf., Pwr. Running Brds.,Leather, Luxury, AC SEATS! Many Extras!

Auto, AC, Pwr Winds, Pwr Locks, Cruise, Tilt, CD Player, Alloys, Moonroof! #C6608, lic#MMX932

$24,988

2004 Mitsubishi Outlander

Auto, AC, Pwr Winds, Pwr Door Locks, CD Player, Roof Rack, Cruise, Tilt, Alloys, Privacy Glass, All-Wheel Drive! #C6528, lic#MMX426

$17,988

2004 Nissan Xterra

Auto, AC, Pwr Winds, Door Locks, Cruise, Tilt, Roof Racks, Privacy Glass, CD Player, Running Boards, Alloys! #C6624, lic#MMX933

$18,988

$44,888

Pwr Lift Gate, Pwr Rear Fold Down 3rd Seat, #C6485, MKT-188 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

GREAT SELECTION! • GREAT DEALS! • MAUI’S IMPORT LEADER! “MAUI’S HOTTEST USED VEHICLES!”

442-9600 25 S. Kahului Beach Rd.

*OAC Prices plus tax, lic., registration fee and $195 Cutter Maui doc. fee Credit on approval. Special down payment terms with bank approval only. Vehicles subject to prior sale and may not be exactly as shown. Sale prices may be withdrawn at any time. New vihicle prices are after all incentives and rebates are applied. Ask dealer for complete details. Sale ends 3/23/05.

MARCH 17, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

Cutter Maui announces the addition of Danny Asao to our Management Team. “Thank you, Maui, for 15 years of incredible support in the automobile industry. Please visit me at 25 S. Kahului Beach Rd. or call my new cell #357-4144.

Vince Esquire & Chris Duarte Saturday, 7:30 p.m. at the McCoy Studio Theatre, MACC [MUSIC] I was sitting on my porch the other night having a beer with some friends when an acute feeling of boredom came over me. It seemed I’d reenacted this same night for months. My nightlife is leaving little to the imagination. But what’s a girl to do in Lahaina with a broken bike? I had to go big, brush off circumstance and go to a show on the other side. That’s right, folks—this weekend I’m going to hear some good old-fashioned blues at the Vince Esquire/Chris Duarte show. If you keep yourself apprised of up-and-coming blues legends, you probably already know who these guys are, but here’s the scoop for the rest of us. Maui-raised Esquire was on a yearlong sabbatical in Austin, Texas recently when he got to hear Duarte’s brand of gritty, intense Southern blues. “[Duarte] is somebody that’s inspired me throughout—beginning, middle and end,” Esquire told me. “He always has something new that captivates me.” So I called Duarte from my warm bed the other morning to see if I, too, might catch a little of that inspiration. His voice was fast and excited. It made it easy to imagine him on stage in cowboy boots playing the hell out of his guitar. He told me how he’d moved to Austin in 1979 with a simple dream of playing music. He bought his first 1963 Stratocaster at a pawn shop for $500 when he was 16 and worked his way up the ranks. “It all depends on how bad you want it,” he said. “When I started out, I played at restaurants and got paid in spaghetti.” Now he is quite renowned. A 1995 Guitar World’s readers’ poll voted him fourth best blues guitarist behind Eric Clapton, Buddy Guy and B.B. King. But when I mentioned it, he quickly brushed it off. “That was a long time ago,” he said. It seemed to me that it didn’t matter to Duarte if he got paid in meatballs or Grammies as long as he got to play. I saw right away why Esquire was so excited to play with him. It will be another great show for Esquire, too, who described his own music as “a unique blend of rock n’ roll and blues with some jazzy influences.” Inspired by John Coltrane, Stevie Ray Vaughn and Jimi Hendrix, Esquire formed his own four-man blues band, The Vince Esquire Band, about two years ago. He’s already made thousands of fans playing at some of Maui’s top venues, not to mention touring with Little Feat, opening at Willie Nelson’s annual Fourth of July party and playing with Eric Johnson, Derek Trucks and Coco Montoya. So come on guys, get off your porches and go. I’ll leave you with these words from a fan of the heartland. “I ain’t no critic but if you ever get a chance to hear this guy play and miss out, you can truly consider yourself a dumbass,” he said. “Nuthin‚ personal, just da facts, man.” [REESE QUICK] Tickets are $18 in advance, $23 day of the show. Call 242-7469. Photo of Chris Duarte by Kurt Swanson

SEND YOUR LISTINGS & PHOTOS FOR DA KINE CALENDAR TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM OR FAX (808) 661-0446 LETTERS

NEWS

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

ThIS WEEK’S PICKS by Samantha Campos

Uh Oh… It’s St. Patrick’s Day Thursday, 12 p.m. to who knows when at Mulligan’s on the Blue [FESTIVAL] There are bars and restaurants all over the island that’ll be celebrating this holiday with plenty of green cocktails and corned beef ‘n cabbage specials. But if you are one of those people who live for the chance to don leprechaun attire and go toe-for-toe with the glinteyed Irishmen downing Guinness and Car Bombs, then to Wailea you will go! Actually, Mulligan’s St. Paddy’s Day Festival also includes tons of live music all day long, as well as contests for Best Hat, Best Green Outfit and Best Irish Accent, among others. Tickets: $15 in advance, $20 at the door, and $10 for service industry workers and Lahaina folk (be prepared to prove it). Are your designated drivers worried about parking? There’s also a free shuttle from the Foodland and Hapa’s lots.

Art Maui 2005 Now at the Schaefer Int’l Gallery, MACC [ART] Since 1978, Art Maui has caused excited whispers throughout the state of Hawaii. It is known to be the place to be showcased for local artists. This year, over 427 artists applied, but only 144 artists got their coveted space (including MTW photographer Kirsten Guenther!) with 175 of their works in everything from sculpture, paintings, video, jewelry, photography, pottery, quilt making, woodworking and whatever else they could get their hands on. For more info, call 244-8272.

THURSDAY

was a son, brother, husband, father, grandfather and friend to many. To those who knew him he was warm, funny and never complained. He was the most generous person you could have ever met. He always remembered people and the little things that they did. He was also the best fisherman and taught many his craft. He was a great provider for his friends and family and embodied the spirit of generosity to all he met. He has found his way home and will be greatly missed.

MARCH 17, 2005

Saturday, 10:30 a.m. at Lihikai School in Kahului [CONVENTION] They don’t call the Republicans the Grand Old Party for nothing. And this Saturday morning at 10:30— the party time for all true Republicans—the Maui County GOP crew will be holding their annual convention. Not only are they going to nominate party officers, but they’re going to elect them and then, just for kicks, swear them in. With the emphasis on “swear,” if you get my drift. There will be nothing “conservative” about this blowout! This is the party of the year! Where else can you see Mayor Alan Arakawa dancing on a table with a lampshade on his head? Okay, perhaps that’s a bit exaggerated. Maybe he won’t be on a table… or dancing… or wearing anything on his head, but that doesn’t mean he won’t rock out. For more information, call 667-0836. [ANTHONY PIGNATARO]

➤➤➤➤➤FRIDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SATURDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SUN

Sadao Wada

Nobody Parties Like Republicans

DA KINE CALENDAR

Sushi Fest Sunday, 6-9 p.m. at Sansei Kapalua [FOOD] Apparently, Sansei is celebrating their 9th anniversary. So there’ll be all-you-can-eat—not one, but five!—food stations, including the one I’ll be camped out at with chipmunk cheeks, the sushi bar! And there’s live music by Soft Touch (Ben and Glenn from the ole Makai Bar days), as well as a Japanese Taiko drum group performance, and some other stuff I’m not allowed to tell you about or the sushi nazi will cut me off. Tickets: $40. For more info, call 669-6286.

Cage Fights Saturday, 6 p.m. at Lahaina Civic Center [SPORTS] Yeah, ouch. Mixed martial arts cage fighters combine elements from boxing, wrestling, kickboxing, jiu-jitsu, karate and maybe some other stuff, not necessarily including eye-poking or ear-gnawing. Although 80 years ago in Brazil, the sport was known as “Vale Tudo” or “anything goes.” Scary. Mixed martial arts actually dates back to the ancient Olympic games in Athens, Greece, where it was called “Pankration,” which to me already sounds like the twisting muscles and snapping bones of yore. Go ahead, say it out loud. Slowly. On Maui, the featured fights will include Ronald Jhun vs. Jay Hieron and Fabiano Iha vs. John Cox. Also featuring: Tyson Nahooikaika vs. Jason Dacquel and Kendal Groves vs. Savant Young. Tickets are $25 in advance, $30 at the door. For info, call 870-7104.

DAY

➤➤➤➤➤MONDAY ➤➤➤➤➤TUESDAY ➤➤➤➤➤WEDNESDAY

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

FILMCRITIQUE

BY COLE SMITHEY

Naomi Watts Goes into the Well Ringu Director Hideo Nakata fumbles with American sequel The sequel to the American remake of the 1998 Japanese horror flick Ringu suffers from common horror genre pitfalls of creepy elements that fail in building authentic suspense or fear. Ringu director Hideo Nakata presides over an image system based on the element of water as newspaper reporter Rachel Keller (Naomi Watts) attempts to settle into a new life with her haunted son Aidan (David Dorfman) in the coastal town of Astoria, Oregon. The videotape that kills those who watch it plays a lesser role here than it did in The Ring with the primary tension focusing on the uneasy relationship between a confused mother and her semi-possessed child. Unexplained plot devices derail the Japanese inflected horror story that’s characteristically fueled by a mysterious longhaired ghoul girl character. The movie opens with a throwback scene to the first Ring movie with a teenage boy and girl sitting on a couch. The boy insists that the girl watch an underground videotape that he describes as the scariest film he’s ever seen. Although she’s more interested in making out, he insists that she watch it and exits for the kitchen where he fields a dreaded phone call as he stresses about the girl watching the tape before his oneweek deadline runs out. We don’t get to witness the cause of the sudden death that follows—only the result. When Rachel arrives at the crime scene in her newspaper reporter mode we see the twisted face of terror on the fresh corpse. But it arrives as a horror device without sufficient context. Rachel and her son Aidan have been trying to escape from the grimy clutches of Samara, a little ghost girl whose mother killed, or attempted to kill as a result of postpartum depression. Things get especially inconsistent in the plot because

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FILM

What have I told you about sitting in strange bathtubs? off-kilter atmosphere. Samara inhabits Aidan for much of the story and A lot is currently being made of the exerts enough psychic kinetic power to cause at “extreme” horror cinema of Japan, but the least one person to commit suicide. It begs a films pale by comparison with those of Alfred question as to why Samara doesn’t just control Hitchcock or Roman Polanski. Horror filmRachel’s mind to do her bidding since she is makers like Nakata looking for a surrogate would do well to study mother figure in Rachel. movies like Polanski’s Nakata also directed The Tenant where a Japanese sequel to information is steadily Ringu, but it bears little Rated PG-13/110 mins. layered over a story resemblance to this that equally increases in tempo. American follow-up. Nakata puts visual The Ring Two is a horror movie with very emphasis on the watery aspects of the story few surprises and hit-or-miss moments of with long ponderous shots of bodies of water suspense that don’t lead anywhere on a narand by infusing every scene with shades of rative or emotional level. A climax of the gray and blue that support his vision but movie occurs when a herd of deer attacks never add up to anything more than a slightly

The Ring Two

★★★★★

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Rachel and Aidan as they’re driving. It’s a virtuoso scene that really gets your heart racing for its sudden revelation that animals are reacting to the evil that rides in Rachel’s car. But the scene feels pasted on to the script because it never resonates anywhere else in the movie. Without Watts returning to make the sequel there would be no movie, and the actress does a bang up job with bringing a powerful sense of dread and desperation to her role. For the actress whose career was jumpstarted when she made David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive, audiences can only hope that she gets another golden opportunity to make such a riveting film as that one. Unfortunately, The Ring Two is not that movie. MTW

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SHOWTIMES

MOVIECAPSULES

MAUI FILM FESTIVAL

MAUI FILM FESTIVAL’S CANDLELIGHT CINEMA Wednesday March 23

Castle Theater, 572-3456 Merchants of Venice - R - Wed 5, 7:30

Merchant Of Venice 5 & 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX

Al Pacino, Jeremy Irons, Joseph Fiennes and Lynn Collins chew up the screen in director Michael Radford's (Il Postino) exceptionally gripping and highly cinematic Shakespeare classic, rightfully called "the most furious courtroom drama ever written" by Slate Magazine. Set in the lavish era of 16th century Italy, the film follows the interlocking lives of a captivating assortment of Shakespearean characters in this story wrought with morality, revenge, redemption and love that "given the story's focus on religion and the intolerance that still rages in today's world remains deeply meaningful to this day" (USA Today). Rated R. 128 min.

Are We There Yet? - PG - Th (12:35), 5:15, 9:55, FrW (2:50), 7:35, Sa-Su (12:35), 5:15, 9:50

Maui Mall, 249–2222 (Showtimes) = Matinee

Constantine - R - Th (2:50), 7:35, Fr, M-W (12:35, 5:15), 9:50, Sa-Su (1, 1:20), 4, 4:20, 7, 7:50, 9:45 Cursed - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (12:50, 3:10, 5:30), 7:40, 10, Sa-Su (12:50, 3:10), 5:30, 7:40, 10 Dreamboy - NR - Th (12:40, 3, 5:10), 7:25, 9:40, Sa-Su (3), 7:35 Hitch - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (12:45, 1:10, 1:30, 3:30, 4:10, 4:30), 6:50, 7:10, 8, 9:30, 9:55, Sa-Su (12:45, 1:10, 1:30, 3:30), 4:10, 4:30, 6:50, 7:10, 8, 9:30, 9:55 Ice Princess - G - Fr, M-W (12:30, 2:50, 5:05), 7:20, 9:40, Sa-Su (12:30, 2:50), 5:05, 7:20, 9:40 Robots - PG - Th-Fr, M-W (12:30, 12:45, 1, 2:45, 3, 3:15, 5, 5:15, 5:30), 7:15, 7;30, 7:45, 9:30, 9:45, 10, Sa-Su (12:30, 12;45, 1, 2:45, 3, 3:15), 5, 5:15, 5:30, 7:15, 7:30, 7:45, 9:30, 9:45, 10

New This Week ICE PRINCESS – (G) – Romantic Comedy - Don’t think this is another Ice Castles, people. It’s just another one of them formulaic, cute teen chick/underdog who battles against “the popular girls” to rise up the ranks and win... something. A trophy? The presidency? Oh yeah, self-esteem. Whoopee. We all know self-esteem gets you nowhere. Just look at Robert Blake! Stars Michelle Trachtenberg, Joan Cusack and Kim Cattrall. THE RING TWO – (PG13) – Horror – That same hot blonde from the first Ring flick (Naomi Watts) and her daughter are in this one, and they’re still being terrorized by a VHS tape that kills people, but this movie is actually totally new. First of all, it takes place six months after the original Ring, and it’s in a completely different town. Also stars David Dorfman and Sissy Spacek, who I guess is having hard times and is going back to her bread and butter horror work.

Now Showing ARE WE THERE YET? – (PG) – Romantic Comedy – Ice Cube stars in this light-hearted look at how a swinging bachelor takes his girlfriend’s kids on a road trip to impress her, but finds that they really only want to turn his life into a living hell. How do they come up with this stuff? BE COOL – (PG13) – Crime/Comedy – In this long-awaited sequel to Get Shorty, debt collectorturned movie producer Chili Palmer (John Travolta) turns into a music producer and decides to promote a struggling singer who’s also being chased by the Russian Mafya. Also stars Uma Thurman, Vince Vaughn, Danny DeVito and the rest. CONSTANTINE – (R) – Action-Adventure, Suspense, Horror and Thriller – As our astute intern put it, this film looks like a cross between The Matrix and Devil’s Advocate. We love that good vs. evil, Heaven and Hell stuff! Plus, it’s got beautiful Kauai-boy Keanu Reeves playing the tortured investigator of supernatural mysteries and hottie Rachel Weisz as... well, who cares. CURSED – (PG13) – Action-Adventure, Suspense, Horror – What’s up with this sudden rash of popular actors and actresses trying to get in on the latest horror flick? Aren’t they supposed to leave that to the B-Listers?! This one’s starring Christina Ricci, some werewolves and an ancient curse, of course. Man, this better be good. Also stars James Brolin and Portia De Rossi. DIARY OF A MAD BLACK WOMAN – (PG13) – Comedy/Drama – Long story short: Successful black couple lives in Atlanta for years, until husband kicks wife out of their beautiful house on their 18th wedding anniversary. Wife then learns to take control of her own life. This movie also features a “pot-smoking, gun-toting” grandmother figure, which practically guarantees that it’s good. DREAMBOY - (NR) - Animation - Dreamboy and his friends make up one of the funniest and most interesting casts of animated characters ever to come out of a computer. Join them as they trav-

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

Sideways - R - Th-Fr, M-W (1:15, 4:15), 6:55, 9:35, Sa-Su (1:15), 4:15, 6:55, 9:35 Son of the Mask - PG - Th only (12:35, 5:15), 9:50

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 875-4910 Be Cool - PG13 - Daily (1:15), 4:45, 7:20, 9:55

You’ll always be my, um... Ice Princess? el from outer space to the wild west--sure, why not. And there’s plenty of politically incorrect humor and cutting-edge computer animation. For ages 17 and up. HITCH – (PG13) – Romantic Comedy – Will Smith plays a matchmaker who uses less than honest methods in his work—whahhhhh???!?!—and then gets busted by a totally hot undercover reporter played by Eva Mendes. Oh, and there’s a chick in the movie named after a popular antihistamine. HOSTAGE – (R) – Thriller – Bruce Willis stars as a hostage negotiator who bungles a case and then swears off hostage negotiation but then has to return to work when his own family is suddenly captured as part of even more delicate negotiations following the kidnapping of a mob accountant. Hmm, sounds like a Bruce Willis film to me. THE JACKET -– (R) – Crime/Thriller, Drama, Romance – After a vet returns home to Vermont with amnesia, he ends up accused of murder. So they toss him into an asylum, pump him full of dope, wrap him in a straitjacket and then lock him in a morgue drawer. While inside, he then travels four days into the future and he sees himself get killed by an unknown assailant. Could happen. Really. Stars Adrien Brody, Keira Knightley, Kris Kristofferson and Jennifer Jason Leigh. MAN OF THE HOUSE – (PG) – Action-Adventure, Comedy – Tommy Lee Jones, an actor with supposedly the IQ of a genius, plays a Texas Ranger (?!) who is assigned to protect some witnesses to a high-profile murder. Uh huh. So he has to go undercover as an assistant cheerleading coach and move in with a group of University of Texas cheerleaders. All right! That IS genius!!

The Jacket - R - Th only (12:30), 5:10, 9:50

sounds like wussing out, considering that Mel didn’t want us to miss one precious moment of Christ’s agony during his last 12 hours, but hey—Mel works in mysterious ways. ROBOTS – (PG) – Animation, Sci-Fi, Comedy – This computer-generated cartoon details a world populated by robots. Yes, I know it sounds fantastic and even a bit childish, but really, this place actually exists! And I’ve been there! No, I swear—what? No, I haven’t taken my meds, yet. Anyway, it features the voices of Mel Brooks, Ewan McGregor, Halle Berry, Greg Kinnear and, of course, Robin Williams. SIDEWAYS – (R) – Comedy, Drama – This could be your typical road-tripping buddy flick, only the “buddies” in question are Miles (Paul Giamatti)—a downand-out failed novelist, middle school teacher and bitter divorcee but apt wine connoisseur—and his happygo-lucky friend Jack (Thomas Hayden Church), who has his own devious agenda for their big “wine tasting trip” before he gets married the following weekend. Also stars Virginia Madsen and Sandra Oh. SON OF THE MASK – (PG) – Action-Adventure, Comedy – I know it’s premature to say something like this, but I think this will be the best movie of 2005. Maybe of the whole decade. I mean, you had The Mask, and that was kind of funny, but this is about The Mask’s son! And it stars Jamie Kennedy! I didn’t think he could ever top Malibu’s Most Wanted, but this one sure looks like a winner.

FILM

Pacifier - PG - Daily (12:35, 2:45), 5, 7:15, 9:30 Passion (Recut) - R - Th only (12:45), 4:15, 7:10, 9:55 Ring 2 - PG13 - Fr-W (12:30, 1:15, 2:55), 4:40, 5:20, 7:10, 7:45, 9:40, 10:05

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 Be Cool - PG13 - Th (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, Fr-Sa (1), 4:15, 7:15, 9:45, Su-W (1), 4:15, 7:15 Pacifier - PG - Th (1:30), 5, 7:45, Fr-Sa (1:30, 4:45, 7:30, 9:35, Su-W (1:30), 4:45, 8 Passion (Recut) - R - Th only (1), 4:15, 7 Ring 2 - PG13 - Fr-Sa (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, 9:55, Su-W (1:15), 4:30, 7:45 Robots - PG - Th (1:45), 4:45, 7:30, Fr-Sa (1:45), 5, 7, 9:10, Su-W (1:45), 5, 7

FRONT STREET THEATERS 900 Front Street, 249–2222 Be Cool - PG13 - Th (4:15), 7:15, 9:45, Fr, M-W (4:45), 7:30, 10, Sa-Su (1:45), 4:45, 7:30, 10 Constantine - R - Th only (4:30), 7:30, 10 Diary of a Mad Black Woman - PG13 - Th only 7:40

Ice Princess - G - Fr, M-W (4), 7, 9:30, Sa-Su (1), 4, 7, 9:30 Man of the House - PG13 - Th only (4:45), 10:05

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249–2222 Diary of a Mad Black Woman - PG13 - Th only (1:45, 4:30), 7:30, 9:55 Hitch - PG13 - Th only (1:45, 4:30), 7:30, 10, Sa-Su (10:45, 1:45), 4:30, 7:30, 10 Pacifier - PG - Th (1:30, 4:15), 7:15, 9:30, Fr, M-W (1:45, 4:30), 7:30, 9:45, Sa-Su (11:15, 1:45), 4:30, 7:30, 9:45

WED, MAR 23

THE PASSION (RECUT) – (NR) – He’s back! Mel Gibson, I mean. He trimmed five to six minutes of the goriest, most violent scenes from his precious move The Passion, and re-released it! Now, I know this

A&E

Million Dollar Baby - PG13 - Daily (1), 4:10, 7:05, 10

Hostage - PG13 - Th (4), 7, 9:30, Fr, M-W (4:15), 7:15, 9:30, Sa-Su (1:15), 4:15, 7:15, 9:30

THE PACIFIER – (PG) – Action/Adventure, Comedy, Family – Vin Diesel stars as some Navy SEAL guy who has to protect—and baby-sit—five wild kids from the same killers who bumped off their scientist parent. Get it? He gets to take out the trash—both literally and figuratively! Who comes up with this stuff?

DAY&NIGHT

Man of the House - PG13 - Th only (2:50), 7:30

Hitch - PG13 - Fr, M-W (4:30), 7:20, 9:45, Sa-Su (1:30), 4:30, 7:20, 9:45

MILLION DOLLAR BABY – (PG 13) – Romantic Drama – This Oscar-nominated film is getting rave reviews, but it’s really just another cliché-filled picture about a young boxer who’s had a tough life but, through sheer force of will, fights the good fight. Stars Hillary Swank, Morgan Freeman and Clint Eastwood, who also directed it.

DINING

Hostage - R - Daily (1), 4:30, 7:25, 10

*with MFF passport (5 films-$40)-single tickets Phone: 572-3456 www.mauifilmfestival.com

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

Ring 2 - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:15), 7, 9:30, Sa-Su (10:45, 1:30), 4:15, 7, 9:30 Robots - PG - Th-Fr, M-W (1:15, 4), 7:15, 9:15, SaSu (11, 1:15), 4, 7:15, 9:15

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

BluesHawaii.com PRESENTS TEXAS MEETS HAWAII

CHRIS DUARTE

Environmentally Aware

and

VINCE ESQUIRE •

Mistress of Ceremonies

Kathy “Tita” Collins

Photo Courtesy of Bron Hollingshead

Sat. March 19 7:30pm

• 100% Recycled Newsprint Paper • Soy Based Dye Ink • Biodiesel Delivery

McCoy Theater at Maui Arts & Cultural Center Tickets: $18 • $23 day of show • 242-SHOW (7469)

MARCH 17, 2005

DAY&NIGHT

ARTS&ENTERTAINMENT

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

Girl, Uninterrupted Ten things you may or may not know about comedian Margaret Cho She’s funny. Margaret Cho started doing stand-up comedy in San Francisco when she was 16. After winning a contest, which meant opening for Jerry Seinfeld, Cho quickly became a college circuit favorite. Defining her own brand of highly personal and hilarious inyour-face delivery, she went on to produce a critically acclaimed off-Broadway show in 1999 called I’m the One that I Want. She starred in All American Girl, the first TV sitcom featuring an AsianAmerican family. It was a show wrought with difficulties, including Cho’s well-publicized battles with the network’s idea of marketable ethnicity. Consequently, the show didn’t last long. “It’s hard to pin down what ‘ethnic’ is without appearing to be racist,” said Cho on her website. “And then, for fear of being too ‘ethnic,’ it got so watered down for television that by the end, it was completely lacking in the essence of what I am and what I do. I learned a lot, though. It was a good experience as far as finding myself, knowing who I was and what direction I wanted to take with my comedy.”

She’s a liberal. “The thing about conservative politics,” said Cho in an interview with In These Times’ Silja J.A. Talvi, “is that conservatives are so incredibly justified in their bigotry and ignorance. That sense of total justification is often something that people who are liberal and compassionate don’t really have.” But she’s not deterred by the results of the last election. “More people turned out to vote than in

COVER STORY

SURF

three decades,” Cho told me recently, “which is impressive. And it’s also impressive that it was so close. There is really a lot of great stuff that we learned about ourselves, politically. The progressives, the Democrats, people who oppose Bush really did win a lot. We know more now than we ever have and I think we’ll really grow politically.”

She loves Maui. But she’s returning this time for business, not pleasure. “We’re just kind of coming in and then we have to go back to New York,” Cho told me, “to shoot a couple of exterior shots for my film, Bam Bam and Celeste. So we’re gonna kind of be in and out, which is unfortunate ‘cause I love to spend time there and hang out. It’s so beautiful and fun. I love Spam musubi.” She will not be running for any political office any time soon. “They don’t make very much money,” Cho said. “It’s kind of a hideous, thankless job. At least I kind of don’t have to work for votes. I can kind of just be silly and do whatever but I think it would just be so serious. And I don’t know if I would like it.”

She has a big mouth. “My favorite activist group was from the ’80s, ACT UP,” wrote Cho in “Presidential Cockfight,” an article published in the political magazine In These Times. “They had a great slogan, ‘Silence Equals Death,’ which meant that if we don’t talk about AIDS we will die of AIDS. I’ve got a similar slogan for me: ‘Silence equals nonexistence.’ That makes me a problem dinner guest. At some point during the evening someone will say, ‘Don’t go there.’ Well, I live there. I bought a house there. I’m going to take you there.”

NEWS

Sunday, 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC. Tickets: $25, $35, $45. Call 242-7469.

She is pro-gay marriage. Just check out her web site: www.loveisloveislove.com. “If the amendment banning gay marriage is actually passed,” wrote Cho in an essay on the web site, “then it would be the first time that the constitution would be amended specifically to deny the rights of a specific minority, which frankly is downright unconstitutional. The argument is ludicrous. Same sex couples should have the ability to get married by Elvis, just like everyone else.”

She’s a feminist and an activist. In 2003, the National Organization for Women (NOW) awarded Cho for having “pushed the boundaries of comedy for women performers and earned herself a dedicated following of fans across the country.” She’s also been honored by the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, American Women in Radio and Television, the Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund, the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, the Asian American Legal Defense and Education Fund and Parents Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays for making a significant difference in promoting equal rights.

LETTERS

Margaret Cho

She’s an over-achiever. “I have a book coming out later this year,” she said. “It’s sort of a book about politics. Then I have this movie [Bam Bam and Celeste] and the tour, which will go out for the rest of the year. And I’m writing another film.”

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

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And she quilts. “It’s one of those things I have to do,” said Cho. “I used to smoke cigarettes—or you know, kind of do unhealthy things like eat or whatever—to combat stress and fatigue. But now I do the fiber arts!” MTW

Cho knows quilting

DINING

7 3/1

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

thursday

03/17

friday 03/18

BADA BING

saturday03/19 sunday03/20

monday03/21 – wednesday03/23

Pono Players, Comedy Improv $15, 8pm

1945 S Kihei Road, Kihei - 875-0188

BLUE LAGOON

TUE - Carroll Brothers, No cover, 7-10pm

658 Front St., Lahaina - 661-8141

BOCALINO

Kilohana No cover, 10pm

Neto Peraza $5,10pm

TBA $5, 10pm

CASANOVA

Progressive Thursdays $5, 9pm

Tropix Orgasmix $8 w/flyer, $10 w/o, 9:45pm

Gomega Fest $12, 9:45pm

CHARLEY’S

Head High & John Moore Project, $5, 9:30pm

The Easy 9:30pm

Ladies’ Night 9:30pm

1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy, Paia - 579-9453

DJ Shark In The Water No cover, 9pm

MON - Mark Epstein & Friends, Blues & Jazz, No cover, 10pm; TUE - Jay Molina & Gilbert Emata, $5, 10pm; WED - Duane Feip & Friends, No cover, 10pm WED - Ladies’ Night, $5, 9:45pm

No Entertainment

MON - Kanoa, No cover, 9:30pm; TUE - No Entertainment; WED - Sun Lounge w/DJ Sal, $5, 9:30pm

DA KINECALENDAR BIG SHOWS

Ebb & Flow Arts - Thursday (tonight!). This performance will be the centerpiece of the annual Ebb & Flow Arts Festival; this year entitled "North South East West." Featured ensemble musicians will be Scott Anderson, clarinet; Ignace Jang, violin; and Robert Pollock, piano, along with special guest artists. The program includes recent works by distinguished composers from Japan, Europe, the United States and Latin America, including the premiere of one multimedia work. Tickets: $25. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Broadway: Alive & Well - Friday. A night of music, mystery and magic—where dreams never die, and earth embraces heaven in songs so beautiful that even angels rejoice! Four-time Carbonell Award-winning performers Dennis and Mona Jones create a world of memories come vividly to life woven in the immortal

fabric of the great Broadway musicals: songs of Gershwin, Berlin, Sondheim, Porter, Herman, Brel, Webber, and many more. Tickets: $25, $20. 7:30 p.m, Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Vince Esquire & Chris Duarte - “Texas Meets Hawaii”- Saturday. Since emerging in the mid-1990s from Austin, Texas, the hair-raising blues guitar slinger Chris Duarte has forged new pathways and scouted numerous fresh trails for creative musical expression. In the meantime, Maui-raised 19-year-old blues guitarist Vince Esquire practiced to Duarte's music to try and emulate his hero. Now these two musicians join talents onstage, for a show that any guitar enthusiast. Tickets: $18 advance, $23 day of show. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Margaret Cho - Sunday. Forthright, ground-breaking, and often controversial, comedy star Margaret Cho has made a career out of taking social issues fullon. As one of the most visible and funniest Asian

HRC MAUI 900 Front St., Lahaina Info: 808.667.7400

THURSDAY MARCH 17TH

ST. PATRICK’S DAY! with DJ Boomshot Coors Specials & Prizes! 10:30-CLOSE • NO COVER!

MONDAY MARCH 21ST

THE EASY

World Class House Music with

Special Guest DJs

Every Wednesday night 9pm-1:30am 142 Hana Hwy., Paia

579-8085 28

MARCH 17, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

PLUS

TEOMAN AND THE KRYPTONES $5 COVER

WEDNESDAYS

ACOUSTIC JAM WITH TIM GANNON 10:30-CLOSE • NO COVER!

THURSDAY MARCH 24TH

SPRING BREAK ROCK N ROLL MELE WITH

Jim Freeborne Band (formerly Deviltown) Les Potts and The Blue Zephr Band Shineola T-SHIRT GIVEAWAY 21+

h a r d r o c k . c o m

American women in the country, and the first in history to star in her own TV series, she has tackled the subjects of ethnicity, weight, sexuality, drug and alcohol problems; no subject is taboo as material for her rapier wit. Her hit off-Broadway show I'm The One That I Want garnered rave reviews and awards, and has been made into film. Tickets: $45, $35, $25. 7:30 p.m, Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

TICKETS ON SALE

John Keawe - April 2. John Keawe is a two-time Na Hoku Hanohano winner and also a two-time Hawaii`i Music Award winner in the slack key category. In his gentle manner and with music that reflects his honesty, John shares his instrumental and vocal compositions, which take the listener on a musical journey of people, places and emotions. Accompanied by the beautiful hula dancing of his wife, Hope Keawe. Tickets: $15. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Norton Buffalo & The Knock-Outs With John Lee Hooker Jr. - April 7. Revered around the globe for his uncanny wizardry, crossing all musical styles on the harmonica. Norton has proven his mastery of this instrument on over a hundred recordings and tours with the Steve Miller Band, Grateful Dead, Bonnie Raitt, Kenny Loggins, The Doobie Brothers to name a few. John Lee Hooker Jr. describes his sound as two parts R&B, one part jazz and "down home blues." Tickets: $35, $30. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Dayton Contemporary Dance Company - April 8. It all started with a group of African-American mothers who dared to dream and sought classical dance instruction for their daughters despite racial segregation in the 1940s. From classes in church basements and school rooms to major stages across the country, DCDC has blossomed into a company known for powerful, artistic performances and virtuoso dancing. Tickets: $28, $18, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Dianne Reeves - April 10. Dianne Reeves is an empress in the jazz world, with expansive range, impeccable pitch and evocative compositions. The simmering effect Dianne brings to a song has earned her many plaudits and special appearances, ranging from HBO to the Olympics as well as the major jazz festivals and the LA Philharmonic. Tickets: $38-$28$20. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. War - April 10. A benefit concert for the tsunami victims. War is known for their distinctive sounds of funk, jazz and Latin rock, performing their top 40 hits “The Cisco Kid” and “Low Rider.” Also appearing are: International Pasteles, Curtis Williams & Hip Pocket, The Celtic Tigers, Cheryl Rae and Friends, Jean Pierre & his Jazz Ensemble, Sounds of Samoa, Memories of Elvis, Zacc Kekona & Piilani Arias and Raiatea Helm. Tickets: presale $25, day of show $30. 1 p.m to 10 p.m., War Memorial Football Stadium, Wailuku, 8777375. Kokua Benefit Festival - April 13. Musician/filmmaker Jack Johnson hosts a benefit concert for Kokua Hawaii Foundation. Jack will share the stage with legendary singer/songwriter Jackson Browne, Hawaiian favorite John Cruz, Afro-Latin-style-masher group Ozomatli, hip-hop infused with Philly style blues pioneers G. Love & Special Sauce, and talented slack key guitarist Kawika Kahiapo with his band Kaukahi. In addition to

that eclectic mix of live music, the festival will offer information on earth-friendly products and services for environmentally-active groups, to help promote awareness in Hawaii. Tickets: $35 general admission (lawn), $40 reserved. 4:30 p.m., A & B Amphitheater, MACC, 242-SHOW. “CATS” - April 21-24. This award-winning Broadway show is the most imaginative and eye-pleasing musicals of the century kids will be utterly captivated. Introduce the whole family to the wonder of live theater with the magical musical Cats, and make memories to last nine lifetime! Performed by a company of outstanding singers and dancers in this official Broadway tour. Tickets: $65, $47, $35, $10. 7:30 p.m. each evening, 2 p.m. matinee shows Sat & Sun, Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Na Palapalai - April 22. Kuana Torres, Kehau Tamure and Keao Costa all learned to play music the old-fashioned way, in family backyards from friends, relatives, and kupuna. As Na Palapalai they aim to please a whole new generation of fans by preserving the traditional Hawaiian sound of ha‘i (falsetto) with their own original styling. With strong instrumental talents and beautifully blended voices, Na Hoku Hanohano awardwinning group. Tickets: $22. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. John Ford Coley with J. Michaels Band - April 28. Grammy nominated John Ford Coley was half of a ‘70s/’80s duo with England Dan, best known for the hits "I'd Really Love to See You Tonight," "We'll Never Have to Say Goodbye Again," "Nights Are Forever Without You," "Sad to Belong," "Part of Me, Part of You," among many others. John will perform these songs as well as new material for a truly memorable show. Tickets: $35, $30, $25. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Sue Ann Loudon - April 30. Celebrating 40 years of inspiration. Former students from all over the world will gather to honor Sue Ann Loudon on her 40th anniversary of teaching dramatic arts at Baldwin High School. An evening of good food, memories and belly laughs, as students from all four decades come together to say “thank you” to the teacher who most touched their lives. Tickets: $10 adults, $8 seniors & $6 students. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 2427469. Brothers Cazimero - May 2. In the ‘70s, the brothers have increased awareness of Hawaii around the world, and their talent, incredible showmanship and infectious humor have helped spread aloha. Beautiful harmonies, acoustic arrangements and hula are always a part of the Brothers Cazimero stage, honoring the past, present and future of Hawaii arts. Tickets: $35, $25, $10. 7:30 p.m, Castle Theater, MACC, 242SHOW. Jonny Lang - May 6. Blues/Rock phenomenon Johnny opened for the Rolling Stones the first time he performed in Hawaii. This explosive young guitar slinger has played to sold-out audiences and has been featured on MTV and performed at the White House for the President with B.B. King. Tickets: $45, $40, $35. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Te Vaka - May 13. Te Vaka delivers more than just a performance they take the audience into the heart of Polynesian, accompanied by rhythm, color and melody. Traditional log drum rhythms from their Tokelauan, Maori and Samoan ancestors are fired with world beat/funk grooves on guitar and keyboard to

thursday 03/17

friday03/18

Salsa Latin Night 9pm

Maui Stars ll CD Release Party 9pm

HAPA’S NIGHTCLUB

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-9001

saturday03/19 sunday03/20

Club 983, Broadcast Live 98.3 9pm

Tea Dance w/DJ Fat Joe 9pm

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL

Habanero Brothers 9pm

DJs El Gato & Ray Masters 9:30pm

Live Local Artists, No cover, 10pm

Rene Alonzo & Rodney 6pm

Kenny Roberts 6pm

El Nino No cover, 6pm

Habanero Brothers No cover, 10pm

Open Jam w/Adam $5, 9pm

NDE $5, 10pm

Live Local Entertainment No cover, 9pm

Karoke w/James No cover, 10pm

JAQUES

120 Hana Highway, Paia 579-8844

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB 36 Keala Place, Kihei - 875-7711

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

Gina Martinelli 6-9pm

Evolution 9pm

Greg Piazza Band 9pm

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

MON - Willie K, Live 104.7FM; TUE - Ultra Fab Tuesday’s w/Fat Joe, 9pm; WED - Aloha Sin Night w/DJ Jammin J, 9pm MON - Reggae at the Rock w/Marty Dread, $5,10pm; WED - The Jamie Browning Band, $5, 10:30pm

St. Patrick’s Day w/DJ Boomshot, 9pm

HARD ROCK CAFÉ

monday03/21 – wednesday03/23

MON - Dr. Nat, Jazz/Salsa, No cover, 7:30-10pm MON - Steve Mendoza, 6pm TUE-WED - Da Hawaiians, 6pm WED - DJ Boomshot No cover, 10pm

Sansei Kapalua’s

9th Anniversary Party Come and celebrate Sansei’s 9th Anniversary for an incredible evening of unforgettable cuisine by Executive Chef Ivan Pahk & Sushi Chef Masa Hattori Live music by Ben & Glenn - “Soft Touch” And if we know Owner/Chef D.K. Kodama, some surprises too!

Sun, March 20th 6-9pm • $40/person for

All-You-Can-Eat Cash Bar

Tickets available at Sansei Kapalua 3-10pm daily

For sure to be a sold out celebration!

669-6286 Late Night Specials KIHEI, THURSDAY - SATURDAY 10pm to 1am – 21 & over with I.D.

50% OFF SUSHI & APPETIZERS FREE KARAOKE DRAFT BEER SPECIALS

EARLY BIRD SPECIAL 5:30pm to 6:00pm DAILY

Kihei 879-0004

Near Foodland

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

Thursday, March 17th LUNCH SPECIAL (11am-4pm)

Fresh Sliced Corn Beef & Swiss on Rye served with fries $6.95

DINNER SPECIAL (4pm-10pm)

Corned Beef & Cabbage with steamed carrots & potatoes $11.95

Drink Specials All Day Black & Tan $5.25 • Guinness Stout $5.00 Killian’s Red $2.75 • UV Green Vodka Drinks $2.75 Jameson’s Coffee $5.00 Hot Creamy Irish Bush $5.00 (Bailey’s, Old Bushmill’s & Coffee)

GREEN

ER Bud & $ B 2.00 (8 ud Lite $ am

-3pm) 1.00 (Ha ppy Hou $ 2.75 (A r 3pm-6pm) ft er 6pm )

★

Every Friday Night is Party Night ★ ★ ★ ★Come As You Are ★ or Dress Like A Star! ★★ ts ues EE G er FR iD nn itted Adm

★

S P R E

★Longhi’s is Maui’s Best Open Air ★ Night Club with Fantastic Ocean Views!

FREE Valet Parking • Dinner served until 10:00 p.m. 9:45 music begins $5 Cover • Dinner Guests Free Admission

Dancing on Longhi’s fabulous koa wood dance floor longhis@maui.net 888 Front St. Lahaina 667-2288 www.longhis.com 30

MARCH 17, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

thursday03/17

friday03/18

KIMO’S

saturday03/19 sunday03/20

TBA

Tom Cherry Band 10pm

Karaoke 9:30pm

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

monday03/21 – wednesday03/23

LIFE’S A BEACH

St. Patty's Day Bash w/Tom Cherry Band, No cover, 9pm

Rubber Sole No cover, 9pm

Dezman Yap & Island Jam $3, 9pm

Karaoke 9pm

MON - Open Jam w/Adam, 9pm; TUE - Crunch Pups, No cover, 9pm; WED - Rick Martinelli, No cover, 9pm

LOBBY LOUNGE

Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30pm

Nils & Anastasia 8:30-11:30pm

Ricardo Dioso 8:30-11:30pm

MON - Nils & Anastasia, 8:30-11:30pm; WED - Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, No cover, 8:30-11:30pm

Live Music 9pm

WED - Karaoke, 9pm

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

Four Seasons Resort, Wailea - 874-8000

Cano Band Featuring Joe Cano 9pm

LONGHI’S

888 Front Street, Lahaina 667-2288

Live Music 9pm

LULU’S

1945 -H S. Kihei Rd, Kihei 879-9944

DA KINECALENDAR hone the music and dance with a modern edge. Te Vaka the canoe speaks to a world culture: “Adrenalinepowered percussion bringing ancient traditions into the modern world.” Tickets: $28, $18, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Mapa Spring Dance Extravaganza - May 14-15. Saturday: Jazz, tap and hip-hop revue; Sunday: Sleeping Beauty Ballet. Celebrate dance with two spectacular shows for the entire family. The classical tale of Sleeping Beauty gracefully put to dance and a high energy dance revue from toe tapping to heel stomping dance styles at its best. Tickets: $20 adult, $15 kids. 2 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

EVENTs

THURSDAY, MARCH 17 Queen Ka’ahumnau Birthday Celebration Thu, 6-9 p.m.; Fri, 5-9 p.m. In Honor of Queen

Ka’ahumanu. Festival celebration includes Aha Hui Ka’ahumanu Society, Punanaleo O Maui, Halau performances, crafts, and lei demonstrations. Free. For info, call 877-3369 ext 25.

FRIDAY, MARCH 18

High Tech Maui Industry Education Exchange - 3:30-5:30 p.m. at Elle Air Ballroom, Maui Beach Hotel Kahului. Approximately 35 graduate students, postdocs, and research scientists will attend this event to network with the Hawaii technical and educational community. Dinner to Follow. For info, call 459-2416.

SATURDAY, MARCH 19

Volunteer Drop-in Program Laulima o Haleakala - 9 a.m.-12 p.m. at the summit district maintenance yard. Projects will include non-native species removal, weeding native planters, ‘opala pickup and a few other maintenance tasks. Work is appropriate for ages six and up. For info, call 572-4487.

Art Maui 2005 - Now through April 10, 11 a.m.-5 p.m. at Schaefer International Gallery, MACC. Maui's community of artists is featured in this 27th annual juried exhibit, which includes drawing, painting, printmaking, sculpture, photography, video installation and craft. Free. For info, call 242-SHOW. Celebrate Ocean Life Through Art - Through March 19, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. at Maui Ocean Center. Presentations and demonstrations by local marine artist including Dale Zårrella, Steve Sundram, Mark MacKay, Richard Marks, Clark Stephens, Ada Horn, Helen Kordyl, Dewitt Lickle. The main mission is to foster understanding and respect for Hawaii’s Marine life. For info, call 270-7075.

International Relief Rally - 11 a.m.-2 p.m. at Lahaina Cannery Mall, Lahaina. This year’s rally will be held by the Lahainaluna High School Amnesty Club. Performances by the Lahainaluna Drama Club, Jazz band and Rock band. For info, call 661-5304. Hawaiian Plant Sale - 9 a.m.-2 p.m. at 150 Kanaloa Ave, Kahului. This is a fundraiser for Maui Nui Botanical Gardens. Offering for sale Hawaiian plants including Palapalai, A’ali’i, Ape, Koa, Native Hibiscus, Banana and Kalo varieties, Kukui, along with craft booths.

SUNDAY, MARCH 20

Adopt Loving and Needy Pets - 11 a.m.-2 p.m. at Humane Society’s Mobile Van. Lahaina Cannery Mall, Lahaina. For info, call 661-5304.

KEIKI

ART

Benefit Concert for Punana Leo o Maui Preschool - 9 a.m.-6 p.m. at Keopuolani Park

“Maui’s Only Irish Pub” 100 Kaukahi St. • Wailea 874-1131

Only $10 for service industry people & those with a FREE T-Shirt for First 50 Cover-Paying Customers Lahaina Address

Doors Open at 12 • No Cover Before 2pm

3 Course Irish Dinner with reserved seating on our VIP lawn for $50 including admission

THURSDAY MARCH 17TH • Party Starts @ Noon Til Midnight FREE SHUTTLE SERVICE UNTIL MIDNIGHT Departs every hour on the hour from Hapa’s Departs every half past the hour from Foodland Parking Lot

Tickets: $15 in advance $20 at the door $10 for Service Industry Workers Available at Mulligan’s on the Blue, Bad Ass Coffee in Kihei, Bounty Music in Kahuhlui and Beach Road Records in Kihei

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

Live Music: 12:00pm 2:00pm 4:00pm 5:00pm 5:30pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 9:00pm

DAY&NIGHT

Welshman Mr. Trevor Jones & Joe Cano Traditional Irish Music with Anril Murray Thorne Maui Celtic Pipe & Drum Band Mulligan’s own Celtic Tigers Maui Celtic Pipe & Drum Band Mulligan’s own Celtic Tigers Crazy Fingers & Crunch Pups A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

• Great Prizes for : Best Leprechaun • Maui Celtic Souvenir Booth • Best Hat Competition • Best Green Outfit • Best Irish Accent • Strolling Magician • Drink Specials • Food Tent • Come Early! Doors close at 9pm

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

BOMBDIGGITTY Saturday, March 26 4:00 pm, A&B Amphitheater

A Battle of the Bands B.E.T. • Ekolu • Ho’onu’a Opihi Pickers • Maui Style Crew (Zacc Kekona, Pi’ilani Arias, Kaiana, Pito) and more! Tickets: $20 advance $23 day of show Gates open at 3 pm; food & beverages available on site: Bentos & Banquets by Bernard; Fiesta Time; Vasi’s Coffee & Desserts; Maui Kazowie Kettlecorn.

242-SHOW

MAUI’S TRUE LIVE MUSIC VENUE

MARCH

SUNDAY

MONDAY

(7469)

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

JOE CANO MC SUPER LOCK DOWN ST PATTY’S NATURAL IN PARADISE DAY PARTY HIP HOP OFFICIAL $3 GUINNESS AFTER PARTY 20

WILLIE K

INDUSTRIAL LOUNGE $2 DRINKS

NO COVER

$3 CORONA $3 MARGARITA

LIVE BLUES

WILLIE K

INDUSTRIAL LOUNGE $2 DRINKS

NO COVER

LIVE BLUES

JOE CANO TRIBUTE TO SANTANA

PAKALOHA FASHION SHOW

LIVE MUSIC

$3 CORONA $3 MARGARITA

JOE CANO MYSPACE.COM TRIBUTE TO SPRING SANTANA BREAK PARTY

LIVE MUSIC

CHECK PARADICEBLUZ.COM FOR CALENDAR UPDATES

744 FRONT STREET • A FEW STEPS BELOW FRONT STREET • 667-JAZZ (5299) • paradicebluz.com 32

MARCH 17, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

thursday 03/17 MANGO GRILL AND BAR

2290 Kaanapali Pkwy, Lahaina, 667-1929

friday03/18

saturday03/19 sunday03/20

Get Your Groove On Friday w/ DJ 1/2 Pint, $5, 9:30pm

Karaoke

monday03/21– wednesday03/23

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm

DJ Swerve No cover, 9pm

DJ Rock Hard Tark No cover, 9pm

MON - Mark & Mike; TUE - DJ Mackie Mac,& Big Zeck, $5, 9pm; WED - DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 9pm

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE

St Patrick’s Day Festival 12pm

TBA

Murry Thorne, No cover, 9pm

Celtic Tigers No cover, 7pm

MON - Gypsy Pacific, No cover, 7pm; TUE - Acoustico, No cover, 7pm; WED - No entertainment

Junior Lequsta, 5pm; The Rocket Show, No cover, 10pm

Cool Rush No cover, 10pm

The Easy, No cover, 10pm

Industry Night No cover, 10pm

MON - Erin Smith, No cover 10pm; TUE - Smooth Tuesday w/Curtis Williams; WED - Hoku, No cover, 10pm

Live Jazz, No cover 9pm-12am

Live Jazz, No cover, 9pm-12am

MC Supernatural $10, 9pm

DJ $5, 9pm

Willie K All Star Jam, $5, 7:30pm

MON - ‘80s Industrial Lounge, $3-5; TUE - DJ Styles, No cover, 9pm; WED - Voodoo Suns, $5, 9:30pm

844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

NEPTUNES

1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 874-2555

PACIFIC’O

505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341

Joe Cano $5, 10pm

PARADICE BLUZ 744 Front St. 667-5299

DA KINECALENDAR Amphitheater. 18th annual Hawaiian music benefit concert. Featuring some of the islands best musicians, live and silent auctions, crafts, keiki zone and food booths. Tickets: $10 presale, $15 gate. For info, call 244-5676.

and elections for County Offers, along with the swearing in of the newly elected officers, including councilwoman JoAnne Johnson are expected to attend. Free. For info, call 667-0836.

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI

SPORTS

LECTURES

BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria – John Kane, Wed, Thu and Fri; Harry Troupe, Sat; Kaleo Phillips, Sun; Clay Mortenson Mon, Tue. All sets from 7:30-10 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700. Cafe O’Lei - Steve Sargenti, Tue-Fri 5:30-9 p.m. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661-9491. Cheeseburger in Paradise – Brooks Maguire, Thu, Sat, Sun and Wed; Harry Troupe, Fri; Gail Swanson, Mon and Tue. All sets from 4:30-7:30 p.m. and 8-11 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855. Cool Cat Cafe - Thu & Mon The Whale Shark Erik Pietsch. 7 p.m. Howard Ahia Fri-Sun, 6:30 - Close. Hau

Lock Down in Paradise - Sat, 6 p.m. at Lahaina Civic Center, Lahaina. Maui's First Mixed Martial Arts Cage Fight. Highlighting the undercard will be 6 action packed bouts, showcasing the best MMA fighters in the islands of Hawaii. This year’s fighters are Ronald Jhun vs. Jay Hieron Fabiano Iha vs. John Cox also featuring, Tyson Nahooikaika vs. Jason Dacquel, Kendal Groves vs. Savant Young. Tickets: $25 presale, $30 door. For info, call 870-7104. Visitor Industry Charity Walk - Mon, 6-7:30 a.m. at the Maui War Memorial Soccer Field. 27th annual charity walk will be three miles and is part of a

Starting a Business on Maui - Wed, 12-1 p.m. at Maui County Business Resource Center, Maui Mall. Anna K. Ribucan will be lecturing on general information and requirements to starting a business. Free. For info, call 873-8247.

POLITICAL

2005 Maui County Convention - Sat, 10:30 a.m. at the Lihikai School, Kahului. This event is being held by the Maui County Republican Party. Nominations

Phat, Wed. 7 - 10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908. Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie - Nino Toscano, Thur, Fri; Kawika Lum Ho, Sat; Damien, Tue; E rnest Puaa, Sun-Wed; Brian Haia, Mon. All sets from 6-9 p.m. 4405 Honoapiilani Highway, 669-3474. Hula Grill - Kawika Lum , Albert & Billy, Mon; Jarret Roback and Albert & Billy, Tue; Ernest Pua’a and Brian & Roy, Wed; Ernest Pua’a and Bradah Brian & Don Thur; Bradah Brian & Roy, Fri; Ernest Pua’a Kawika Lum and, Sat; Kawika Lum Ryan Tanaka & Friends. Sun. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Building P, Kaanapali, 667-6636. Java Jazz/Soup Nutz – Acoustic Music with Mike Fri-Sat only 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., 6670787. Kahana Terrace Restaurant – Harry Troupe, Tue and Thu; Randy Reno, Sat. All sets from 6-9 p.m.

statewide fundrasing effort. This year’s theme is “Mahalo To Our Troops.” For info, call 986-0404.

THE

H EART

O LDE M AKAWAO T OWN

Wild Wahine Wednesday with dj blast

C ASANOVA ’ S F AMOUS L ADIES N IGHT ! T E T E C T A HE

VENING

HAT

ARNED

ASANOVA

“B EST L ATE N IGHT I N M AUI ”

WARD

MUSIC STARTS @ 9:45PM • $5 COVER

ULLRTOSN.ES H T E V I S S E R G FU E PURPOO PARADISO • TH ETRY • CINEMA than archeti & Jona ombe, Paul M w/Fulton Tash S @ 9:00PM MUSIC START VER $5.00 CO

18 FRI., MARCH

RCH 17 THURS., MA

Starr

IX M S A G R O X I P TRO & TIM DAWG DJs THE KIDD ancers

and go go d s e v o ro G l u Soulf PM STARTS @ 9:45

19 SAT., MARCH

05 0 2 T S E F A G E GOM DA PARTY! S @ 9:45PM MUSIC START VER $12.00 CO

MUSIC $10.00 COVER

Make it a Memorable Evening • Dine and Dance at Casanova For dinner reservations call 572–0220 • Log on at casanovamaui.com LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

thursday03/17 SANDBAR & GRILL

89 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8742

SANSEI 115 Bay Dr., Kapalua - 669-6286 SANSEI Kihei Town Center - 879-0004

friday03/18

DJs Durty & Apostle w/special guest, $3, 9pm

TBA

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

saturday03/19 sunday03/20 TBA

monday03/21– wednesday03/23

Open Mic Nite w/Jarod 10pm

MON - North Shore Sextet, No cover, 9:30pm; TUE - TBA, 9pm; WED - Lawai’a, 10pm

Acoustic w/Kanoa & Cody No cover, 9:30pm

MON - DJ ED V, No cover, 10pm; TUE - DJ Bad Ass Tony, No cover, 10pm

Hale & The Hot Lava Band No cover, 9pm

MON - Jukebox Nite, No cover; TUE - Erin Smith, No cover; WED - John Moore Project, 9pm

DJ Blast $10, 9:30pm

SPATS TRATTORIA

Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali - 667-4727

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd - 874-6444

Crunch Pups No cover, 9pm

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave. - 572-1380

TSUNAMI NIGHTCLUB

3850 Wailea Alanui Dr. - 875-1234

Open Jukebox 9pm

Kenny Roberts & Friends 9pm

Funky Munkey $3, 9pm

Mark Epstein & Friends $3, 9pm

DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am

DA KINECALENDAR Sands of Kahana Resort, 669-5399. Kimo’s – Sam Ahia, Wed thru Sun, 7-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811. Leilani’s On The Beach – Crazy Fingers, Thu, 4-6 p.m.; JD & Friends, Fri - Sat, 2:30 -5:30 p.m.; Kilohana, Sun, 3:30-6 p.m; 2435 Ka’anapali Parkway, Building J, Ka’anapali, 661-4495. Moose McGillycuddy’s - Greg & Steve, Thu; Llayne & Greg, Fri; Mark & Mike, Sat-Sun; Anastasia, Wed. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 6677758. Pioneer Inn – Ah-Tim Eleniki (Local-style guitar), Thu; 6-9pm; Greg Di Piazza, Wed 6-9 pm., 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. Reilley’s Steaks & Seafood - Live music (grand piano) 6-9 p.m., Gene Argelle, Mon and Tue; Joel Gold, Wed; Thu, Darrin Lenett, Fri. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Ste #304 Kahana, 667-7477 Sea House Restaurant – Hawaiian music with Albert Kaina and Kincades Basques, Thu; Kincade Basques, Fri, Sat, Mon,Tues; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed. All sets 7 p.m. - 9 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapiilani Road, Napili, 669-1500. Sir Wilfred’s At Whalers Village - Sun. Live Jazz 5 p.m. - 9 p.m. Main stage. The Best Jazz Musicians on the island, along with special guest stars. 2435 Ka’anapali Park Way, Lahaina 661-0202.

SOUTH MAUI

Bada Bing - Fri, Hilarious improv comedy with The Pono Players. Dinner & Show, $35. Seating 5:30-7 p.m. Sat, David Gallagher sings songs by Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin & the rest of the Rat Pack plus humor & storytelling. 8 p.m. $5.1945 S. Kihei Rd. in Kihei 875-0188. Blue Marlin Harbor-Front Grill & Bar - Fri, Mon Boy Kana’e and Ka’ Uhaneleo Sat Braddah Frances and friends 6:30 p.m. Sun Terri Garrison 4 - 6:30 p.m Maalaea Harbor, 244-8844. Capische? – Mark Johnston; Thu-Sat; Brian Cuomo Su, Wed; Sal & Estaire Godinez, Mon.; all sets 7-10 p.m. Diamond Resort, 555 Kaukahi, 879-2224. Maalaea Grill – Benoit Jazz Works, Thu, Fri and Sun, 6:30-9 p.m.; Jimmy C Jazz, Sat, 7-9 p.m. Maalaea Village Shops, 243-2206. Marco’s Southside Grill – Various artists (piano), Mon -Sun. All sets from 7-10 p.m. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., 874-4041. Mulligan’s on the Blue – Fri ,Tue, Wailea Nights, , dinner and show. 8- 10p.m.; Celtic Tigers, Sun, 7-10 p.m., Mon Gypsy Pacific 8-10 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131. Seawatch Restaurant - Nightly Music 6 -9 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., 875-8080. South Shore Tiki Lounge - Sunset happy hour $3 special's. Live entertainment Sun, Tue, Thu Tony & Peter. Wed & Fri Trevor Jones 4-6pm. Outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. 1913 Kihei Road, Kalama Village, 874-6444. Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café – Wed-Fri; guitar and vocals w/ Brado, Sat; Brian Wittman Sun-Mon; Patrick Mayor, Tue All sets from 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. Yorman’s By The Sea – All That Jazz Band, Wed,- Sun 7 p.m.- 10 p.m. 760 S. Kihei Rd. Kihei 874-8385.

CENTRAL MAUI

MARCH 17, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

Brigit & Bernard's Gardencafe - Live entertainment. 335 Hoohana St., Kahului Café Marc Aurel - Thursdays, Gene Argel and Shiro Mori, 7-10 p.m, 2nd Friday of every month, Shimmy Nights with Bellyroll Dance Company, 7-9 p.m. 28 N. Market Street, Wailuku near the Iao Theatre. 2440852. Mañana Garage – Nightly Neto & Friends, Latin music, 6:30 -9 p.m. 33 Lono Ave., Kahului, 873-0220. Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi. Live Music every Wed. 4 p.m. - 8 p.m. Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI

Jacque’s - Mon, Live Jazz; 5 p.m.120 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-8844. Livewire Cafe - Various Artist Tue 7-10 p.m. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. Moana Cafe - Hula Honeys, vintage and contemporary Hawaiian music with elegance and aloha. Wed, Fri Live Jazz. Sun Anik 6-9 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI

Embassy Vacation Resort – Ka’anapali Beach 104 Ka’anapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill: Live music, Thu & Wed; Patrick Major, Fri; Wayne & Friends, Sat; Scott Baird & Gretchen, Sun; Ernest Pua’a w/ Hawaiian music, Mon & Tue. All sets from 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly. Swan Court. The Blue Note Swing Orchestra, Dancing nightly to Swing.Tue,Th, Sat, 2 p.m.- 4 p.m. Spats: Weeping Banyan Lounge with nightly Live Hawaiian Contemporary Music 6:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. Ka’anapali Beach Hotel 2525 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0011 Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages Illusions and dinner show Tue-Sat, 4:30 p.m., Kanahele Room; Lanui, live music and dancing, 6-9 nightly. Free hula show, 6:30-7:30 nightly; Sunday Champagne Brunch with Hawaiian music by Polinahe, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Kapalua Bay Hotel 1 Bay Drive, Kapalua, 669-5656 The Bay Club: Jazz trio, Fri and Sat, 6-9 p.m.; solo pianist, Sun-Thu, 6-9 p.m.; Gardenia Court: contemporary Hawaiian music, Sun, 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m.; Lehua Lounge: Free hula show Wednesday and Fridays. 5:15 p.m -8:30 pm. Maui Marriott 100 Nohea Kai Drive, Kaanapali, 667-1200 Nalu’s: Kilohana, Wed, 8-10:30 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort 5900 Honoapiilani Highway, Napili, 6691500 Hawaiian Music: Kincaid & Albert, Thu; Kincaid Basques Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed; All Hawaiian music shows from 7-9 p.m. Ritz-Carlton Kapalua One Ritz-Carlton Drive, Kapalua, 669-6200 Lobby Lounge: Live music, 6-10 nightly. Banyan Tree Restaurant: World fusion duo Ranga Pae,Tue-Sat, 6:15-9:45 p.m.

Kapalua Indoor Amphitheater: Masters of Hawaiian Slack Key Guitar Concerts series features traditional Hawaiian music. Every Tues 6 p.m.- 8:30 p.m. Tickets: $40 visitor and $30 kama`aina rate. The Legend of Kaulula'au: Young Hawaiians loving their culture and willing to perpetuate an aspect of their Hawaiian culture, the art of storytelling. Every Sunday at 4 p.m. and 6:30 p.m. Tickets: $30 and $27 Kamaaina. 1-888-808-1055. Royal Lahaina Resort 2780 Kekaa Drive, Kaanapali, 661-3611 "Eddie and Eddie" w/Eddie Lilikoi and Eddie Sebala, 5-9:30 nightly in the Royal Ocean Terrace. Royal Lahaina Luau featuring authentic Hawaiian and Polynesian song and dance at 5 nightly. Sheraton Maui Hotel 2605 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0031 Lagoon Bar Entertainment w/hula dancers, 6-8 nightly: Bobby & Ralph, Thu, Mon and Tue; Ralph & Allan, Fri; Fausto & Kawaika, Sat and Sun; Nathan & Ralph, Wed; torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset, 7-8 nightly. The Westin Maui Hotel 2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525 Tropica: Mitch Kepa, Mon & Sat-Su; Benny Uyetake, Tue-Fri. 6-9 p.m. Tableside magic by Fortunato Tue & Thu, and Wed& Sat 7- 9p.m.

SOUTH MAUI Four Seasons Resort Wailea 3900 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-8000 Lobby Lounge, Hawaiian music w/Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran, Thu, 5:30-7:30 p.m. followed by jazz w/Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; contemporary music w/Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis, Fri, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; island style trio, Sat and Mon, 5:30-7:30 p.m. w/hula dancer 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria, Sun, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Nils & Anastasia (of VooDoo Suns) live & unplugged Mon and Sat, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata, Wed, 8:30-11:30 p.m. Sunset torchlighting nightly. Grand Wailea Resort Hotel & Spa 3850 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-1234

Botero Bar entertainment, 5:30-9:30 Live Music Wed; Strolling Hawaiian duo in the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a nightly. The Fairmont Kea Lani Maui 4100 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-4100 Cafe Ciao Restaurant. Jazz entertainment from 69 nightly. Wailea Marriott 3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-1922 Hawaiian Entertainment w/hula 6-9 nightly in Kumu Bar & Grill. Hawaiian entertainment 9-11 nightly in the Mele Mele Lounge featuring Pam Gamboa Peterson Mon and Sat, Mitch Kepa & Raymond "Mundo" Medeiros. Paradise & Ka Poe O Hawaii perform at the Luau, Mon, Tue, Thu and Fri. Renaissance Wailea Beach Resort 3550 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-4900 Sunset Terrace; Live Hawaiian contemporary music by Lono Mon-Tue; Wed-Thurs Bobby Krueger; Fri Mahalo Greig; Sat Rama Camarillo; Sun Mondo Kane; all sets 6- 9 p.m. Maui Prince Hotel 5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111 Molokini Lounge: Ron Kuala’au, Hawaiian and contemporary guitar and vocals, Sun, 6-10:30 p.m. and Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m. Mele ‘Ohana duo, Mon, Wed. and Fri, 6-8 p.m., Mon-Sat, 8:30-10:30 p.m. and Mon, Wed and Fri, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

EAST MAUI

Hotel Hana-Maui Hana, 248-8211 Hawaiian Music in Paniolo Lounge, Thu thru Sun, 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Hula show, every Thu and Sun, 7:30-8:15 p.m. in the Main Dining Room.

Send your listings & photos for the Da Kine Calendar to calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 661-0446

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For customer service call 1-617-450-8773 or email MauiTime@placepersonal.com ABBREVIATIONS: A-Asian; B-Black; C-Christian; D-Divorced; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; J-Jewish; M-Male; N/S-Non-Smoker; P-Professional; S-Single; W-White GUIDELINES: Personals are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses and have first meetings occur in a public place. This publication reserves the right to edit, revise, or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content of or replies to any ad. Not a service of all ads have corresponding voice messages. To review our complete guidelines, call (617) 425-2636

LETTERS

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DA KINE CALENDAR

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

AUTOMOTIVE

CLASSES & INSTRUCTION TEACH ENGLISH Travel The World And Get Paid!!! With Global TESOL College. Please call for details 1-888-TESOL-US or visit www.GlobalTESOLUSA.com (AAN CAN) Acquire training at Pro-Fit Worldwide! Study to become a Personal Trainer. Call Today! 800-225-1962 or visit us online at pro-fit-worldwide.com (AAN CAN) NEWS FLASH! POLAR ICE CAPS

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coins, tokens, medals, stamps, paper money, Hawaiiana, sport collectibles

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COMPUTER EQUIPMENT Area 51 Computer Service www.area51maui.com On-Site Repairs & Upgrades Home Office/Networking 298-9274

TRAVEL

MARCH 17, 2005

If you have had motion sickness or queasiness on a boat in the past, and you are not pregnant or nursing a child, and you are an adult or child 8 or older, you may be eligible to participate in a study testing an essential oil product for motion sickness on a whale watching trip. There is no cost to you.

Monday, March 21, 2005: 12-3pm Pacific Whale Foundation: Slip 52 at Ma’alaea Harbor next to Maui Ocean Center You must register and receive approval to participate Call: 888-257-6000 / PIN#1514 or email jpw@wave.hicv.net Soothing Scents, Inc. Maui’s Only Metaphysical

Store For Sale MELTING AT ALARMING RATE! Established customer base. Rare Learn to SCUBA before it’s too late! Dive Today with SHAKA DIVERS, o p p o r t u n i t y . Professional, Safe, Fun Lessons and w w w. g e o c i t i e s . c o m / m a u i m a g Dive Tours. Torpedo Dives, Hydro- icbox/4sale.html 808-205-8055 Optix Masks! (808) 250-1234 www. SETTLEMENT RECIPIENTS! shakadivers.com it’s SHAKA-RIFIC Get the most cash for your structured settlement. Fast Service. Personal WEBSITE TRAINING Learn to design, build & maintain your Attention. FREE QUOTE. www.stonown website. $50. per hour. FREE ini- estreet.com 1-800-844-5136 (AAN tial consultation. Blue Cloud @ 276- CAN) 0561 RANDEM SYSTEMS FINANCIAL TRAINING SERVICES Learn to live debt free and have some money from your current income. Learn to invest properly. Do not believe that if you have no money there is nothing that you can do. (808) 344-0256

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CAMP IMUA 2005

Camp Imua Needs:

EMPLOYMENT

NOTICES

ALOHA VALUED READERS We would like to let our readers know that we try to screen most of our ads. We read back the ad copy to ensure that it is the correct information that advertisers want. If you see the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a national ad and was not submitted directly to us. If you have a question directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org

Maui Recycling Service If not now, when?

When you subscribe for 3 months of bi-weekly service – (A $25 value!) New customers only – offer expires 3/31/05

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) Prepare for a metaphysical avalanche around the 20th. It’ll mostly bury your (mental) house. These massive shifts of bedrock and rubble could be dangerous, but also lucrative. It depends on how prepared you are to dodge disasters and take advantage of opportunities. Yeah, some of your most familiar rooms and hallways will be completely covered by the wreckage; you won’t be able to use them for some time. But new or neglected sections of your home are likely to be exposed by the shifting debris. Spend some time exploring these, and discovering what you’ve gained, instead of lamenting what you’ve lost.

244-0443 • www.mauirecycles.com

Surf the Maui MLS Listings at www.barrybrownmaui.com Barry Lee Brown (R) P.O. Box 11782 Lahaina

(808) 661-1800 A portion of every commission is donated to the Surfrider Foundation of Maui

ROOMS FOR RENT Treatment Rooms For Rent at Wellness Center 100 or 300 square feet. Also ideal for office space or possible retail in Makawao. 572-5551

APARTMENTS FOR RENT FURNISHED, 1 BEDROOM APARTMENT FOR RENT In Honokawai @ Maui Lani Terraces. Cool, Quiet, Parking, Great Neighbors. Available Immediately, For More Information Call (864) 363-0301

HIV COUNSELING AND TESTING

AD DEADLINE

If you feel that you have been potentially exposed to HIV and would like Free, Confidential and Anonymous testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900. It is important to know your HIV status so that you do not unknowingly pass the virus to others, also early detection is vital to your health and treatment. The Maui AIDS Foundation now offers Drop-In HIV Counseling and Testing (No appointment necessary) Drop in hours are Mon.-Fri. 8:30am to 4:30pm, Wed. 8:30am to 7pm 1935 Main Street, Wailuku For more information on HIV/AIDS, STD’s including Viral Hepatitis and HIV Counseling and Testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900. In Hana call 248-7801, Lanai 5656722, and Molokai 553-9086.

MONDAY 4PM

VACATION RENTALS CLEAN, AFFORDABLE Accommodations in our vacation rental from $49 per day. Call Toll Free Wailuku Guesthouse 877-986-8270 or www.wailukuhouse.com

Eat right. Get your sleep. Some signs, like those oft-radiant Leos, can swing wildly between hot and dumpy depending on self-perception; for them, pure confidence can equal beauty. For Taureans, however: not so much. Sure, your attitude can affect how people perceive you, but chiefly, variance in your appearance comes from purely concrete matters; basically, how you’ve been taking care of yourself. Lately you haven’t been doing as good a job in this department as you could, and, unfortunately, it shows. Reverse the trend. Get on that treadmill, eat some salad, and give yourself a full eight hours a night. Who says you can’t go from homely to handsome overnight? You can.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Save your work. Every five minutes. This pertains not just to whatever’s on your computer, but in any situation where you could lose advances you’ve made—the universe is feeling mighty greedy lately, and apt to suck all your efforts towards entropy. Don’t give it a chance. Be vigilant. Be redundant. Make two copies of everything important. Do it now, because you won’t get any advance warning (other than this one). You’ll tap a key and it’ll just be gone, and nothing you can do will bring it back. Unless of course you’ve got a backup on hand; now, how good would that feel? Make it so.

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CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) Bide your time. Life’s way more complex than a chess game, but bear with my analogy: Sometimes you just have to wait until all the pieces are in place before you make your move. If you “attack” early, you lose. Next week’s Full Moon in Libra is your cue; at that point you’ll have a better than even chance to accomplish whatever agenda you currently have in mind, be it seduction, career advancement, or revenge. What to do this week, then? Make sure everything’s as ready as it can be for when you launch your plan, and chill.

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LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Keep things well-ventilated and cool this week. Your normally long fuse has just been clipped to a fraction of its usual length, and it’d be a shame if you blew your top over something little and stupid, just because you weren’t paying attention. Act as if you’re actually holding a delicate, vibration-triggered bomb under one arm: move slowly, talk softly, and when conflict rears its ugly head, quietly slip away before it can set the explosives off. You won’t have to tiptoe around your life for long; by this time next week, you should be able to put the thing down, make lots of noise, and fiercely engage in arguments, all without exploding.

808.661-0446

A public health message provided by The Maui AIDS Foundation.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

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LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22)

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COVER STORY

This week you give sensitive a new meaning. Please be careful: you won’t always be able to correctly anticipate your own reactions to familiar influences. A single cup of coffee could affect you like three (same goes for alcohol, by the way). A horror movie that you’d normally laugh at might have you on edge and jumping at shadows for days. A great fuck could make you decide you’re in love. You’re unusually vulnerable to the things around you; it’s like the volume of the world is turned way up. Don’t don blinders and earplugs, though—it’s hot shit when things are this vivid and intense—and can be intensely enjoyable, when you know what you’re doing. Prove you do.

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TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20)

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NEWS

The other day I imagined what it’d be like if all the seasons shifted two months forward. The school year would begin in mid-summer, for example, and the leaves would change around Christmas-time, and we’d all be slightly psychologically screwed up by it. Nothing serious, I guess, but I mention it because of your recent timing issues. The universe hasn’t been providing you with clues you can understand. You’re not only having trouble with the big stuff, like when to propose marriage or buy a house, but the little mundane crap, like when to eat or sleep. Unfortunately, this strange signal-less limbo will continue for another few weeks, despite your best efforts. Until then, all you can do is try to get your eight hours and three squares, whatever random time you can, and hope for the best.

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What would you do if you learned, early on in a pregnancy, that your new baby would be born deformed? The doctor might present abortion as a possibility. Would you consider it? Or would you gladly sign on to the kind of devotion required by your new “special needs” child? Luckily, the stakes this week aren’t nearly so high, even if they occupy the same genre: something you’ve created (and which is about to be born) has been revealed to be very different—even quite compromised—compared to your original vision. Will you kill it now, so it’ll never be, or will you help it achieve its full potential nevertheless? It’s a rough decision, sweetheart. Good luck.

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SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) My boyfriend has a morbid theory about the correlation between how we react to death in our dreams, and how we’ll react to the real thing when it eventually comes. He thinks it’s probably quite similar. Who knows? But I do think that dreams can be good practice for other events in your life; how you handle things that scare you, anger, conflicts, and love affairs while asleep can have relevance to what happens when you wake up. You need this kind of practice. Anticipate future events (not necessarily anything so heavy as your own death), and daydream (or really dream, if you’re lucky) about them, so that when they come around for real, you’ll be prepared, not clueless.

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SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21)

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Less is more this week, baby. You probably wouldn’t approach a stranger and hand him an x-rated picture of yourself in a misbegotten attempt at flirtation. It might get you the desired results (though that’s unlikely), and it’s certainly not that classy, or even remotely in line with what you’re about right now. Sometimes the crudest, most direct path is best, but not at the moment. There are better ways, more subtle routes. Even if they take 10 times longer than the shortcut straight ahead, they’re still far superior. Please find and choose one of them this week.

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CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19)

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You’ve probably heard that crappy joke about the guy stuck on his roof in a massive flood. A few rescue teams in boats and a helicopter arrive in succession to save him but he says, “Nah, God’ll save me,” and ultimately drowns. In heaven he’s like, “What the hell, God?” and God says: “Hey, I sent two boats and a chopper, and you wouldn’t budge.” This week, please reverse your expectations about what salvation—of your career, your relationship, or simply your day—will look like, because they’re worse than useless. They’ll only keep you from recognizing the real thing when it comes along.

DROP OFF

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) Stop pissing into the flames, Aquarius. You can’t put out this blaze by yourself. It’s valiant of you to try, but also foolhardy. Once things have gotten this extreme, they’re bigger than what any one person can stop or control on his own. You need help, lots of it, and fast. Shove aside any guilt or remorse about this crisis. Whether or not you set these disastrous events into motion isn’t the point. Get the aid you require to quell or at least direct the mighty forces you may have helped unleash, now, before someone gets hurt.

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PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20)

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

HOLOHOLOGIRL

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

Pisces drink like fish We are all born naked and screaming and if you’re lucky that sort of thing won’t stop there. - Unknown My birthday week was exhausting. I’m never going to drink again. “Yeah,” said my friend Dave, snickering. “Good luck with that.” But I knew it was going to be trouble. The actual date of my birth was mid-week but we started on Monday, as Mr. X and I joined forces to celebrate his birthday and last night on the island. We went to the Tiki Lounge in Kihei and almost immediately became inundated with boobs, b-day cocktails and mysterious shots from friends and strangers. We made nice with these two ladies who looked like Hustler centerfolds. Upon my suggestion, the one wearing a birthday banner sidled her sizable accoutrements up to Mr. X, who then squeezed my knee in fear. Men! They want it until it’s in their face and then they do lots of Jager shots and run away screaming... Wait, did I say men?! Yeah, read on. The next night at midnight, I celebrated my birthday starting at Hecocks with Circle, Rainbow, Cooper and Mr. Charming himself, Jerry. I made Kevin do a Mind Eraser with me. Then I went to the SandBar. Northern Calif. reggae band Groundation was on, while Dave and fellow-Piscean Reeny gathered libations in my honor. On my birthday, people were really nice and gave me presents. I even got some lovely and creative, called-in birthday songs. Ah, having musician friends finally pays off! Later in the afternoon, I went to my tattoo consultation with Circle at Evolved Art. Afterwards, high on adrenaline, I met Sasha for dinner at Sam Sushi. Then we went to see The Sea Inside at the MACC. And it was off to the Sly Mongoose, where Jen was bartending. Thursday night was the big Me First and the Gimme Gimmes show at the Hard Rock Café in Lahaina. And on Saturday, I went on a private whale watch excursion at sunset. The Blue Family was there, as well as a small gang of us looking for a little breach action before we got hammered on champagne and beer. FYI: we did get much action, on both counts. We also passed an imaginatively colored barge called the Red Rhino. “Isn’t that the name of a vibrator?” someone asked. Did I mention Sonja was on board? Yeah, we determined she’s not so much Scandinavian as she is Scandal-labian. So after the cruise, BJ, Kim and I went to Charley’s in Paia. Unfortunately, we missed the John Moore Project but Kim got to see her favorite Maui band The Easy. And then Marty Dread performed and made me crush on him all over again as he dedicated a birthday song to me. Hey, don’t hate me ‘cause I give shout outs. I might have missed some details here and there but basically, birthday week was good times… And I’ve noticed—especially during this past week—that it’s hard to achieve the balance of actually having fun and doing this column stuff. What does my editor call it? Oh yeah, reporting. It says so right here in Linda Goodman’s Sun Signs: “The Pisces writer may be tempted to lounge for years in bars, telling himself he’s gathering material, when he’s really just gathering moss and unpaid bills.” Ouch. Needless to say, I took the next week off to recover. But by Friday, I had decided to hang out on the Westside to see Go Jimmy Go at Paradice Bluz. Before that, I had to give Kim a ride to the Mango Café in Ka’anapali. She’s been co-hosting a new nightclub-y thing there and had been trying to get me to check it out. Of course, now that I’ve become a Central Maui girl, I’ve previously declined with a great deal of smirkitude. Alas, paybacks are a bitch. I must say the place really does have potential. It’s open-air, looks over the Ka’anapali golf course and has a decent dance floor. And there were some surprisingly attractive people collected around the easy-to-flirt-across rectangular bar. And I met a bee-yoo-tiful Southern boy who my friends call—maybe for some reason I don’t want to know—Gutter Rat. You can tell I thought he was cute ‘cause the next day I was really hung-over (read: we did many Jager shots. Thanks a lot, DJ Half-Pint). And then I ran away. Um, how about I’m never going to drink Jagermeister again? Damn devil’s drink. MTW

MARCH 17, 2005

CLASSIFIED

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DINING

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

MARCH 17, 2005

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