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■ APRIL 28, 2005
■ VOLUME 8
■ ISSUE 44
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The puzzling case of Roger Swanson pg.10
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The puzzling case of Roger Swanson – by Anthony Pignataro
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County planning chief contests car-crusher at Kanaha – by Cheryl Ambrozic-Mooz
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•News of the Weird •Ted Rall Cartoon
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Editor: Anthony Pignataro anthony@mauitime.com (Jack Russell Terrier) Associate Editor: Samantha Campos sam@mauitime.com (Black Labrador Retriever)
•‘Prevalent Everywhere’ How Women Helping Women is coping with DV – by Krista Sherer
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19 •This Week’s Picks 22 •Film: The Happy Ending Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy ( )
Publisher: Tommy Russo tommy@mauitime.com (Mexican Hairless) MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2005 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc.
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MAUI TIME WEEKLY
APRIL 28, 2005
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NEWCOLUMN!
BY THE EDITOR
Chatting with the Editor As the editor of Maui Time Weekly, people come up to me all the time and ask all sorts of questions about the paper. So each week, I’ll sit down and chat with a different member of the Maui Time ‘ohana. This week, I spoke with contributing writer George Thrustgood. Editor: Hey George. Thanks a lot for talking with me.
[…] Editor: What did you say? Thrustgood: You mean, all this time—you didn’t know? Oh wow, this is awkward. Editor: I’ll say. How do you think Payroll feels? [Both laugh uproariously]
Thrustgood: No problem, boss. It’s my pleasure. Editor: Now I forget—how long have you been writing for the paper? Thrustgood: About 20 months, not that I’m keeping count. Editor: That long, huh? You know, I’ve been at the paper about that long myself. Time certainly flies when you’re having fun. Thrustgood: And how. But working for an editor like you really makes it go easier.
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Thrustgood: Damn, I knew you were going to ask me that. Wow. I guess I just feel that getting a real job where I’d have to work and wear a tie and be on time is just too horrifying to contemplate.
Editor: I’m sorry, but I’m just not buying it. It’s absolutely impossible for you and I to be the same person. Thrustgood: Look, try to be open-minded about this. Oh hey, Pignataro just walked in. Hey Anthony, come here a sec! Pignataro: What do you want? Editor: Well, I was just talking with George here, and he seems to think that he and I are, well, the same person. Pignataro: That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard. Editor: See! I told you!
Editor: That is so weird! You know, I’m glad we finally sat down and talked because what you’re saying is exactly how I feel. I mean it’s uncanny.
Thrustgood: I can’t believe you don’t know either.
Thrustgood: And that surprises you?
Thrustgood: Actually, I’m serious. The Editor and I are the same person.
Pignataro: Know what? That you’re nuts?
Editor: Shouldn’t it?
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Editor: Oh, please. Tell my why you got into journalism.
Thrustgood: Yeah. But seriously, how could you not know? I mean, everyone in the office knows that I’m just a pen name you use for humor pieces and such. It’s the worst kept secret around here. Ask anyone.
Thrustgood: Well, I mean, of course what I feel is the same as what you feel. You and I are the same person.
Pignataro: Riiight. Next you’ll be telling me that I’m you guys or you two are also me, or something like that. [Thrustgood shrugs his shoulders] MTW
EH BRAH! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less, changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A–7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or send an e-mail to
ehbrah@mauitime.com Please get off your old boys’ club, salary-draining Department of You Know What butts and start doing the job we pay you to do. You know, just in case the concept of doing the right thing doesn’t instill in you a sense of responsibility. You know who I’m talking about. How long are we and the tourists going to have to continue looking at the collection of wrecked vessels lying in our West Maui waters? Why don’t you just do your job and haul them away? And if other like-minded groups or clubs are standing in the way of your acting in the manner appropriate for your office and responsibility, then take the high road and make the first move. Please, it’s what we pay you to do. And we will actually respect you for it! Aloha!
MAUICOUNTY
BY CHERYL AMBROZIC-MOOZ
‘Seek an Alternative Location’
Noise Matters
County planning chief contests car-crusher at Kanaha Citing considerable opposition from a variety of county, state and federal agencies, the Maui County Planning Department has told local tow truck operator Mike Kitagawa that it opposes his building a car-crushing facility on Hobron Ave. next to the Kanaha Pond State Wildlife Sanctuary in Kahului. “In light of the concerns raised by these agencies, we find it difficult to support your proposed facility at its current location,” Maui County Planning Director Michael Foley wrote to Kitagawa on Apr. 7, 2005. “You are again advised to follow the recommendations of these agencies and seek an alternative location such as your Alamaha Street location.” Kitagawa refused to comment on Foley’s letter. But other county officials are vocalizing their opposition. “I believe there are serious and obvious concerns associated with the proposal to site a heavy industrial activity of this sort next to a protected wildlife sanctuary, home to three species of native endangered birds,” said Rob Parsons, the Maui
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County Environmental Coordinator. “I applaud Director Foley for his comments to the applicant, encouraging him to choose another location.” While Maui County clearly has to do something about the ballooning number of abandoned cars, crushing them next to an endangered species habitat isn’t the answer. As Maui Time has previously reported (see “The Big Squeeze,” Apr. 7 and “Explosive,” Apr. 14), the county Department of Fire and Public Safety, the U.S. Department of Interior’s Fish and Wildlife Service and the state Department of Land and Natural Resources (DLNR) have all put into writing their opposition to Kitagawa’s proposal. DLNR is concerned that loud noise from the facility will harm the endangered Hawaiian stilts, coots and ducks that make their home at Kanaha. Federal Fish and Wildlife officials told the county it was likely that cars reaching the crushing lot would still contain many toxic fluids that would inevitably leak into the Kanaha Pond. But it was the county Fire Department’s comments that were the most explosive. “A fire is a very real possibility at this location, even with most/all vehicle fluids removed,” Fire Captain Val Martin wrote to the county. Martin added that should his department have to battle a blaze at the crushing yard, water contaminated with oils and fluids could run off into the Kanaha Pond. In his Apr. 7 letter, Foley also wrote that the Planning Department has received at least one complaint against Kitagawa for already stacking abandoned cars on his lot. “[T]here are current problems of possible oil contaminants on the ground,” Foley told
Complement: 2437 Scheduled Maui Visit: May 3, 2005 Last Center for Disease Inspection: Feb. 26, 2005
Control
Hemp Can Grow in All 50 States
Score: 97 out of 100 Read through enough CDC Vessel Sanitation inspection reports, and you see that sometimes cruise ships get written up for some rather petty stuff. “The plastic tasting spoons [in the Deck 3 Galley] were not dispensed with the handles all facing the same way,” read one violation in the Feb. 26 report on the 41,000-ton Norwegian Wind. But more often than not, the CDC inspectors find scarier problems. Like possible poisoned food and toys scary. In the same report cited above, inspectors also wrote that, “mold was noted inside a sealed package of mozzarella cheese.” And over in the Kid’s Corner, “the Lego toys were found still wet with disinfectant in a large plastic bin.” -Anthony Pignataro
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Kitagawa didn’t waste any time Kitagawa. “Please be advised that this complaint has been forwarded to our Zoning and Enforcement Division for proper action.” County Planning Department’s Staff Planner Colleen Suyama said Kitagawa also hasn’t responded to Foley’s letter. But she added that all hope isn’t lost for him. He can still try to fix the problems outlined by the various agencies above. But if he can’t, he’s going to have to forget about crushing cars next to the Kanaha Pond. MTW
It requires no pesticides or herbicides (Cleaner water for all of us)
Recently a Liquor Control inspector showed up at Jacque’s in Paia during one of their DJ sessions. Not to soak up some world music or do a little dancing, but to wave his noise meter around and check the decibel readings. I mean, sure—liquor, noise—it’s all the same, right? Of course a liquor license would be tied to sound levels. The LC scrutinizes a club’s dance floor dimensions and location, and that’s a fire issue. So why not noise, too? Noise comes up in the LC hearings more often than you’d think. It’ll be coming up again as the Liquor Commission begins holding hearings on removing the noise restrictions from Hana Hou Café in Haiku. The cafe has been open four years and has apparently caused no complaints. Of course, it can’t have live music or stay open late either. It’s located in the Haiku Cannery where the old Lounge used to play rock music in the days before the LC packed decibel meters. When the Lounge closed, the LC moved in and turned the volume way down. “I want the opportunity to expand my business,” owner Leslie Lai told the Commission during its April 13, 2005 hearing. “[But] I want to prove to the community that I would still be very considerate of the neighborhood.” Though Commissioner Manuel Moniz, Jr. pointed out that he thought it was odd to perpetuate restrictions on one place when other nearby establishments could operate freely, the future of Hana Hou could go either way. In early September, 2004, the Liquor Commission put the screws to Yorman’s by the Sea in Kihei after cranky Menehune Shores residents who live above the restaurant swarmed into the hearing chamber to denounce “the Count Basie rendition of ‘One More Time.’” But earlier this year, at the Feb. 9 Commission hearing, the panel was far more gracious to Bamboo Chi in Wailea. Though a bunch of Wailea Community Association residents showed up to complain against allowing Bamboo Chi to hold live music past midnight, the Commission opted to stay out of the fight, saying nearby residents needed to work out their differences with the restaurant. MTW
—Anthony Pignataro
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MAUICOUNTY
BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO
WEDNESDAY, APR. 20 Went to work this morning listening to a nonsensical David Marcus essay on National Public Radio denouncing teenage drug abuse in all its forms. He got all huffy because today is 4/20, Stoner Day or whatever the kids are calling it these days. Yes, yes, it’s all very bad. But Marcus completely missed the real significance of today—it’s Adolf Hitler’s birthday! On this day in Braunau, Austria back in 1889, little Adolf was born. To celebrate, our fearless leader George W. Bush today paid homage to the giant banks and credit card companies who’ve so loyally funded his presidential campaigns by signing a 500-page bill making it nearly impossible for not-sowealthy citizens to declare bankruptcy. Never mind that the big credit card companies can slap down all sorts of unexpected penalties and rate hikes on people who miss a payment by a mere hour. Or that the companies are increasingly scheduling due dates on Sundays or holidays, which increase the odds of racking in late payments. Or that many of these fees and rate increases are buried in legalistic fine print that few attorneys even understand. And guys like Marcus wonder why 4/20 is all the rage.
THURSDAY, APR. 21 Everything’s going up, at least according to today’s Maui News. I’m talking about fees. Wanna play nine holes at the Waiehu Municipal Golf Course? It’s
gonna cost you more now. Wanna get your stray dog out of stir? It’s gonna cost more. Wanna gas up your new Mustang GT? Gonna cost more. And oh, look at this: the core inflation rate is rising. I’m shocked! Well, let’s take stock of our nation as a whole: we’re fighting two wars half a world away; the Bush Administration has, far from raising taxes to pay for those wars, actually cut them; and as a result our budget—which was running surpluses just five short years ago—is exploding in deficit. But look on the bright side—Dubya has just three and three-quarter years to go in his second term.
FRIDAY, APR. 22 The Sierra Club Hawai’i Chapter hates him. So does Hawai’i’s Thousand Friends. Ditto the Native Hawaiian Legal Corporation. The state legislature is auditing his office. Of course I’m speaking of Peter Young, the embattled boss of the state Department of Land and Natural Resources. He’s under fire for not filling important vacancies in the office and just generally giving more attention to corporate uses of state natural resources than you’d expect from a guy tasked with protecting them. Anyway, Young is firing back. And by “firing back,” I naturally mean “diverting the issue.” First there was that Maui News editorial last week pleading that we all have responsibility for the land. Now he’s sending out a press release denouncing—better sit down for this one—people who drive on the beach and/or set
OVERHEARD... “I WEIGHED MYSELF AT WORK ON THE FISH SCALE TO SEE HOW MUCH I’D COST AS AN AHI. I COST WAY TOO MUCH.” -Guy talking to friends at Hecocks in Lahaina, Apr. 20
• • • • • •
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NEWS
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Committees and lobbyists who want to move bills through congress, but still, it was a nice gesture.
MONDAY, APR. 25
Did someone say Everett Dowling recently? Oh yeah, it was me. The Maui News ran six letters to the editor today, all calling on THE WEEK IN REVIEW Anyway, the guy who wants to build 71 luxury condos at people to “save Akaku,” the pubMakena bitched to The Maui lic access cable channel currently News today about how he’s the under fire by developers like victim in the fight he started to cut Everett Dowling. The letters are Akaku’s budget. “There are people all similar in tone and style even who talk of freedom of speech for though they come from all over what they are producing on the world—a phenomena the Akaku,” Dowling told the paper. News addresses in a rare “Editor’s “But if you have a view different note.” “In a 24-hour period from [Akaku executive director] Sean Friday, The Maui News received 23 similar eMcLaughlin, you suddenly are not entitled to mails in support of Akaku,” the editor noted. freedom of speech.” Now that’s comedy! Not “The messages were prompted by an Internet because Dowling refused previous calls for him ‘Media Action Alert’ issued by Democracy to appear on Hawai’i Public Radio and talk Now.” Ha! A measly 23 emails! Maui Time was about his role in the whole matter, but because included in that same alert, and we got a whopDowling often uses his vast financial resources ping… hold on, let me count them... 21 emails. to secure more freedom of speech than most Wait, that can’t be right. I mean, how could people enjoy. According to The Limtiaco we… You see… It’s gotta be… Oh, shut up. Company’s website (www.thelimtiacocompany.com), Dowling hired the public relations SUNDAY, APR. 24 firm to develop “a strategic plan to position this A bunch of Hawai’i-based citizen groups like upscale developer as a good corporate citizen Citizen Voice and the League of Women and to generate positive publicity on his projVoters and two state senators—Bob Hogue (R, ects.” This they did by performing “extensive 24th District) and Les Ihara, Jr. (D, 9th community grass roots work” and undertaking District) have called upon all state legislators to “an extensive study of Hawai’i environmental stop holding campaign fundraisers during the and anti-development groups,” which all resultlegislative session. “The citizens coalition wants ed in the “permitting of multi-million dollar to eliminate the public perception that lawmakhomes” and “numerous positive testimonies.” ing is influenced by legislators’ campaign needs,” read a recent Citizen Voice press release announcing the call. So far, a whopping three TUESDAY, APR. 26 state officials have agreed. But one of them is our Just out of curiosity—is it still good PR if your own state Senator Roz Baker (D, 5th District)! flacks brag to the world about how they manOf course, there’s nothing to stop Baker or any ufactured “grass roots” support? other signatory from holding twice as many fundraisers outside of the legislative session from Anthony Pignataro is increasingly wonderthe very same corporate Political Action ing if anybody ever reads these. MTW
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NEWSOFTHEWEIRD
BY CHUCK SHEPHERD
IVY LEAGUE BLUES
LIFE IMITATES ART
In March, a Princeton University graduate student in applied mathematics, Michael Lohman, was arrested, suspected by police of being the guy who has been assaulting Asian women on campus for weeks by snipping locks of their hair or by furtively doctoring their drinks with unspecified “bodily fluids” in the dining hall. And a week after that, in Rockport, Mass., a chaired professor of economics at Harvard named Martin Weitzman was charged with larceny. A farmer said Weitzman has long been trespassing and hauling away manure for his own nearby farm, thus denying the farmer his market price of $35 per truckload.
According to a February report in the Israeli daily Ma’ariv, Itzik Simkowitz is suing a pet shop owner in Beersheeba for selling him a sickly Galerita-type cockatoo (price: the equivalent of about US$2,000) that died shortly after Simkowitz got him home. As in a classic Monty Python sketch, the shop owner initially insisted that the parrot was merely lethargic and needed time to adjust to his new surroundings, but when the parrot (to use the Python dialogue) was shown to be “a late parrot,” “an ex-parrot,” “a stiff,” and to have “joined the choir invisible,” the shop owner still refused to return the money.
INVISIBILITY Mr. Mamadou Obotimbe Diabikile was shot by police and arrested after his unsuccessful attempt to rob the Mali Development Bank in Bamako, Mali, in March, in part hindered by the nearly seven pounds of magic charms he was wearing to make himself invisible. And musician Edna Chizema went on trial in March in Harare, Zimbabwe, for allegedly defrauding Ms. Magrate Mapfumo by convincing her to pay the equivalent of US$5,000 for Chizema to fly in four invisible mermaids from London to help recover Mapfumo’s stolen car.
HOLY COW! Kim Chan, 40, of a village in the Cambodian province of Kampot, announced in March that he had a cow that was heavenly possessed and could cure illnesses by exposure to its bodily fluids, but local official Khun Somnang immediately discounted the claim, saying, “We had a holy cow here a year and a half ago [and you] don’t get two that close together.”
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William Woodard, 39, suspected by police in the Trenton, N.J., area of more than 50 burglaries, was arrested in March, and authorities said they were confident they could match him to what had become one of the “signatures” of the crime spree: random splotches of excrement at several crime scenes. In the course of the arrest, a highly nervous Woodard failed to control his bowels, and police have submitted samples for DNA testing.
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THE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE Tony Young, 35, made the news in January in Flint, Mich., when he tried to stop the theft of his Mustang (“my pride and joy”) by grabbing the spoiler and hanging on for 20 minutes as the thief drove through Flint and on two interstate highways at speeds up to 80 mph, trying to shake him off. Young still managed to call 911 on his cell phone and describe his route until police could join the chase, which ended when the driver fled on foot and was captured. Two weeks later, “Young” was arrested and charged with breaking into a home, and police discovered that his real name is Anthony Barry and that he has served two stretches in prison. MTW
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Spamtastic! Bessie King wants to be Ms. Spam Waikiki Spam Jam The 2005 Waikiki Spam Jam Festival takes place Saturday, Apr. 30. To vote online for Bessie King to be Ms. Spam Hawaii 2005, visit kccnfm100.com or hawaiian105.com.
CHOCK FULL OF HEADY GOODNESS
Bessie and her precious Spam Bessie Ku’uipo King loves Spam. She loves it so much that on Apr. 1 she started sending emails announcing her plans to enter the Mr./Ms. Spam Hawaii 2005 competition as part of the 3rd Annual Waikiki Spam Jam Festival. Naturally, everyone thought she was joking. “Everyone keeps asking ‘why are you doing this?’” says King. “Ultimately though, my mom dared me.” King is one of five finalists in the Mr./Ms. Spam Hawaii contest and the only contender from Maui. A bonafide “island girl,” King’s worked with the National Park Service, at the Hard Rock Café, a helicopter company, in various bars, in an automobile factory and currently as a family’s personal assistant—a sort of “Girl Friday for the domestically disabled.” Considering Hawai’i her home “forever,” she’s left Maui only once, to attend Purdue University in Indiana. “They made fun of me,” she says. “The way I talked, my slippahs, the Spam eating. They were really conservative.” Eating Spam is not a notion mainlanders seem to grasp with as much gusto as Pacific Islanders. Since becoming an integral staple food during World War II, Spam consumption in Hawai’i far exceeds that of the rest of the nation—nearly seven million cans are sold here each year. It has
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APRIL 28, 2005
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BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS
become so ingrained in island culture that every convenience store includes Spam products in their deli cases. Even McDonald’s features Spam McGriddles for breakfast. “Growing up in Hawai’i,” King says, “I would be proud to represent Spam. Provided they don’t look into my past!” She’s kidding, of course. But she might be talking about a brief stint she had as a vegetarian. Anyhow, it wasn’t long before she returned to her childhood love of Spam. She remembers selling Spam musubi for school fundraisers. And Spam was King’s saving grace when her family went camping. “I was a picky eater,” she says. “My family would be diving for lobster, preparing fresh fish for dinner. Not me. I was eating Spam right out of the can, not cooked, with tomato syrup.” When King worked in Haleakala National Park, weeding invasive species and replanting natives for days at a time, she and the biologists relied on Spam. They would use it in their stirfry or for breakfast. She says the best Spam meal she ever had was when they were down to “an onion, a can of corn, canned pineapple, a carrot, a can of Spam and plenty of rice. It’s just the right combo of sweet and salty.” These days, King is studying to get a bachelor’s degree in Natural Resources and Environmental Sciences. Her family has two acres in Kanaio on Maui, which she is hoping to use for outplanting and keiki education. She is also an avid paddler with outrigger canoe club Lae Ula O Kai and says she’s powered by Spam during regatta season. “I eat a lot of Spam musubi,” she says. “[It’s] my favorite and most convenient way to eat Spam.” To be a Mr. or Ms. Spam Hawaii 2005 contender, you have to be a Hawai’i resident, write an essay on Spam, present an idea for a possible commercial, as well as submit a “Spamtastic” photo. King began campaigning immediately. Family members posted fliers. Friends helped video her commercial. Another friend—a National Geographic photographer—offered assistance. “He said I’d be easier to photograph than wild animals,” she says, giggling. The winner of Spam Hawaii gets $1000 cash, 365 12-ounce cans of Spam and the coveted title. Plus she would have to be available for the occasional interview. Since entering the contest, King said she’s learned a lot in the process. ‘You can do anything you want if you believe in it,” she says. “Even if it’s a lonely trail of Spam!” MTW
MAUICOUNTY
BY KRISTA SHERER
‘Prevalent Everywhere’ How Women Helping Women is coping with DV My friend Rosa was a battered woman. She came from an affluent two-parent family where her parents never even raised their voices. But then she met Jack. They started out as friends, then decided to get closer. He was handsome and persuasive and she fell in love with him quickly. At first their love was like any other young couple. It was strong and almost consuming. They were sweet to each other and loved spending time together. Months passed, and they found themselves having little disagreements that sometimes would become heated. She just thought he was passionate and he always made it up to her. He began telling her not to spend time with her friends, getting jealous easily and yelling at her. He slammed doors and punched walls. Then she got pregnant. He wanted to start a family with her so they moved in together. Then one night after he had been out with his friends he came home, started another argument, then punched her in the face. Falling to the floor with her he began to cry, begging her to forgive him, and saying that he was sorry. She fell asleep that night with him holding her tightly. He would wake every so often to whisper how much he loved her. But the next morning, after he left for work, she packed her things and took off. Ninety eight percent of all domestic violence victims are women. Here on Maui, the police received nearly 5,000 reports of DV last year. The Women Helping Women violence hotline rang more than 11,000 times. Of those calls, 8,766 women and children sought some kind of refuge at the shelter. “It is easy to romanticize that these relationships are happening because both parties enjoy it,” said Dan Judson, president of Women Helping Women. “After the honeymoon stage is the tension building stage and how you handle the tension building stage is what separates abusive and non-abusive relationships.” Women Helping Women runs the only domestic violence shelter on Maui. This week they’re hosting their eighth annual “Elegant Afternoon Tea” fundraiser at Bev Gannon’s Sugar House in Hali’imaile. To get an idea of what the shelter is up against, I visited their facility. The shelter itself is a well-maintained house surrounded by beautiful grounds. Valerie, one of the staff members who would only give her first name, led me through the grounds. She also had me sign a waiver of confidentiality, promising that I wouldn’t reveal the identities of the women there or the shelter’s location. With a ‘no turn away’ policy, I could only imagine that communal living with
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Elegant Afternoon Tea Sun., May 1 from 1 p.m. to 4 p.m. at Bev Gannon’s Sugar House in Hali’imaile. Tickets are $50 ($40 of which is tax deductible). For more information call Women Helping Women at 242-6600. women in crisis could sometimes be intense. But when I walked through it was quiet. A woman sat in the living room watching television, a child playing a video game at her feet. I asked Stacy Moniz, the shelter’s executive director, why domestic violence was such a problem here in Hawai’i. “It is a problem all over the world,” she said. She said the reason it appears to be so bad here is that we are a “talk story,” close-knit community. A lot of times, she said, we know what is happening in our neighbor’s house before their own family does. “It is not more prevalent here,” she said. “It is prevalent everywhere and I think this is a myth that people need to be educated on.” Instead, Moniz said we should look for DV roots in American culture, which she said was rooted in violence and aggression. She also said the shelter’s temporary restraining order office counsels women who “are lawyers, doctors, rich, educated and even famous.” Finishing my walk through the grounds, I stopped in the spacious kitchen. There, someone had stuck a quote from former British Prime Minister Winston Churchill on the refrigerator door: “A pessimist sees the difference in every opportunity and an optimist sees opportunity in every difference.” MTW
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LEFT: DON SWANSON; RIGHT: ROGER SWANSON
From Homeowner to Homeless The puzzling case of Roger Swanson
Right now nobody knows where Roger Swanson is. He’s been missing for the last month. Recent attempts by his family to find him proved fruitless. There are stories of him riding his bike up and down South Kihei Road but no one’s quite sure where he lives now. Some say he’s living on one of the Kam beaches or even in a storage unit. Like many homeless people, Roger suffers from mental disorders. In his case, it’s Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder and clinical depression. It’s possible he doesn’t know why he’s homeless. It’s also possible he doesn’t know that he’s got more than $200,000 in the bank. Roger is totally alone now. His family, what’s left of it, lives on the mainland. His brother, who’s long been his guardian, is terminally ill. He’s been homeless since Mar. 16, the day the State of Hawaii ordered him evicted from the one bedroom Kihei condo he’d owned free and clear since 1999. His crime? Refusing to pay $3,500 in Kihei Kai Nani Homeowners
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COVER STORY
Association fines. The fines were for Swanson’s habit of collecting junk. He might have intimidated and harassed some of the people where he lived, but really, he got kicked out because of all the junk he piled on his lanai. Because Swanson ignored the fines, the Kihei Kai Nani (KKN) Homeowners Association sued him, got the court to seize the home he owned and then auction it off. The legal matters took about five months. “It’s a sad story,” said Matthew S. Kohm, a Wailuku attorney appointed by the court to act as commissioner over the auction. “I have a lot of compassion for Roger. But his own worst enemy is himself. Roger is difficult to help because he won’t let anybody help him. He’s extremely smart and manipulative. If he doesn’t get his way, he starts acting like a young child.” At the same time, Roger’s story also shows the extent to which one homeowners association went to enforce their covenants and restric-
tions—even if it meant throwing a mentally disturbed man onto the street. Roger’s apartment at Kihei Kai Nani isn’t exactly oceanfront, but it is just a couple minutes walk to Kamaole Beach II, one of the best swimming beaches on Maui. It’s also in the heart of Kihei, between Denny’s and KKO. The apartment, built in 1970, is typical condo living. It’s 621 square feet, with one bedroom and one bathroom. It comes equipped with a full sized washer/dryer. According to people who know him, Roger was completely normal and healthy until about 20 years ago, when got into his 40s. Roger first came to Hawaii in the early 1960s, when he volunteered for the U.S. Army. For much of his three-year enlistment, Roger served in the 25th Infantry Division, based on Oahu. His job was to guard the secret Red Hill Underground Fuel Storage Facility just north of Honolulu. “It’s a volcano filled with caves,” said his
By Anthony Pignataro brother Donald, who also served in the army. “There are stories that there they stored nerve gas, atomic stuff, but I don’t know. It was a very secret thing. Roger was in those caves on a daily basis. I always wondered if there was any possible connection [to his later mental problems]. I have no basis to suspect one, but I just wonder.” After the army, Roger got a college degree and went into banking, eventually working his way up to a vice president’s post at a Seattle savings and loan. But then his mother died, and Roger’s personality seemed to change. He became brusque and depressed. Things got so bad he entered the Seattle VA hospital. But his brother Donald lived on Maui at the time and owned a couple units at the Kihei Kai Nani. So Roger bought a place there. On April 12, 1999, escrow closed on Kihei Kai Nani’s Unit #151. County property records show the unit had sold for as much as $139,000 back in 1990, but a depressed real estate market had brought the price down to $86,000, which Roger
paid off entirely. The day after escrow closed, Roger left the VA hospital in Seattle and got on a plane for Maui. Problems began almost immediately after he arrived. That summer, residents and visitors at the Kai Nani began complaining to the Association of Roger’s “violent outbursts.” It got so bad that his brother Donald had to write to then-KKN board President Sandy McGowan. “Both Roger and I are aware that his conduct in several cases is not acceptable in a condo environment and that he must work hard to control his outbursts,” Donald wrote on July 19, 1999. A week later, McGowan wrote back. “Yes, I have had some very serious complaints about Roger’s incorrect and intolerable behavior,” she wrote. “Hopefully there will be no further violent outbursts and our guests, owners and staff will not feel threatened.” The thing was, Roger’s situation—then and now—was apparently completely treatable. And everyone involved, including the homeowners association, knew it. “If he takes anti-depressants and gets regular sessions with a psychologist, he’s okay,” Donald told me in a phone interview from his Northern California home. “The best treatment is a combination of both. One without the other doesn’t work—I know, because I’ve researched this extensively.” But Roger wasn’t doing both. In fact, he didn’t seem to be doing either. As the value of Roger’s condo rose, so did the list of his KKN Association violations. Current Kihei Kai Nani manager Victoria Bournkamp refused to comment for this story. Her boss, Nancy Price of Destination Maui, did not return repeated phone calls for comment.
“A PERSON LIKE ROGER SHOULD NEVER HAVE BEEN LIVING IN A PLACE LIKE THAT,” KOHM TOLD ME. “IT DOESN’T LOOK GOOD FOR THE ASSOCIATION THAT THIS GUY GOT EVICTED. BUT LIVING IN A CONDO, YOU HAVE TO HAVE AGREEMENTS AND HARMONY.” Nonetheless, court records outline Roger Swanson’s “violations.” He fed birds on the property. He went dumpster diving, then began storing the trash and junk on his lanai and on the lawn in front of his apartment. He harassed Association staff—especially when they tried to make him stop dumpster diving. The Association fined Roger, who ignored the fines. This went on for months, then years. Roger also piled trash into his apartment. As court-appointed commissioner, Matthew Kohm was able to arrange a visit to Roger’s apartment. He took photographs. “The judge ordered me to go in,” he told me. “It was disgusting. It was worse than disgust-
ing. There was serious health risk. He turned the electricity off when he’d leave, so there were maggots in the refrigerator. Roger would cook things. He’d smelt metal in his apartment. He would draw these blueprints, like in A Beautiful Mind. Some of [what he had] was pretty good junk.” For those living next to Roger, the problem was magnified. Forget trying to rent units to tourists—the smell alone from Roger’s garbage heap probably ruled that out. By the summer of 2003, the KKN Association had had enough. Citing rarely used though perfectly legal provisions in their voluminous Association Covenants, Conditions and Restrictions (CCRs), the Association went to court to force Roger into a judicial foreclosure. It didn’t matter that Roger held the deed to his condo—he wasn’t playing by the Kihei Kai Nani rules, so they would kick him out. First they got a lien placed on his property in August, 2003. When Roger did nothing, they sued him. “Defendant has failed and neglected to pay $3,925.93, said sum representing the share of common expenses and other charges assessed to said Property as of October 6, 2003,” wrote Association attorney Ray Wimberly in a court filing dated Nov. 6, 2003. Let’s pause here a moment. Roger owed the Association $3,925.93. That’s all. Had he paid those fines, it’s almost certain he’d still be living in his apartment 151. But Roger didn’t pay the fines. He ignored them. He also ignored the court summons delivered to him the same day his homeowners association sued him. Those were bad decisions, sure, but they were nothing compared to his choice to act as his own legal counsel.
PHOTOS COURTESY OF MATTHEW S. KOHM
“A person like Roger should never have been living in a place like that,” Kohm told me. “It doesn’t look good for the association that this guy got evicted. But living in a condo, you have to have agreements and harmony.” Roger’s trial began before Judge Joel August on May 14, 2004. It continued on and off all summer. It didn’t go well for Roger. On Sept. 1, 2004, Judge August appointed Kohm as commissioner. His job would be to oversee the eventual auction. “I suggested he declare bankruptcy,” said Kohm, who probably talked with Roger eight to 10 times during the case. “I suggested he get a reverse mortgage. But he said, ‘I’m so poor. All I have is this place. What can I do?’ He said he could make it go away.” By this point, there was only one way to make it go away—have a psychologist declare Roger Swanson to be mentally incompetent. Had that happened, the court would have appointed a guardian over Roger, sold his condo and then placed all the proceeds into an annuity that would have provided Roger with a steady income and protection from any creditors. But despite the fact that Roger’s brother Donald repeatedly spoke with psychologists and social workers at the Maui Veterans’ Clinic, it never happened. “I kept calling the VA,” said Donald Swanson. “The office representative there made a halfhearted attempt to see [Roger]. I did everything I could to help him. But they just dropped the Homeless: continued on page 12
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ball. The VA just sits on its hands. They have a vet here who needs help. Not financial help—he just needs someone to give him his medication and help him get over this.” No one at the Maui Veterans Administration clinic or the VA center in Honolulu would discuss Roger Swanson’s case. “We have to abide by the HIPAA Rule,” Fred Ballard, the public information officer for the VA in Honolulu told me, referring to the federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act updated in 2003 to make VA case information completely confidential. “We need the veteran’s expressed written permission to release the records to his family. Without written permission, there’s nothing we can do.” In fact, though Roger clearly has mental problems and obviously can’t take care of himself, he’s not completely lost. “Roger is very functional,” said Kohm. “His
“[THE] CLERK STATED THAT MR. SWANSON HAD CONTACTED THE COURT BY TELEPHONE THIS MORNING AT 8:05 AM AND INDICATED THAT HE HAD MISSED THE BUS FROM KIHEI,” IS HOW THE OFFICIAL TRIAL MINUTES PUT IT. BY 9:21 A.M., WHEN ROGER STILL HADN’T SHOWED UP, JUDGE AUGUST DENIED THE MOTION. disability only hits him in certain ways. He’s got a sense of humor. Roger can be charming. But only in in-depth conversations do you realize that it’s not all clicking.” One day, coming out of another contentious court hearing, Kohm repeatedly asked Roger for access to the apartment. He needed to show it to prospective buyers. At the very least, he’d need to photograph it. But Roger kept saying no. “I’m just too messy,” Kohm said Roger finally told him. “Everybody’s got to be good at something,” Kohm replied, which he said prompted one of the only times he saw Roger laugh. Times were becoming difficult for Roger. He had lived at Kihei Kai Nani for five years. It was his home in every sense of the word. But now he was facing eviction. And worse. On Nov. 29. 2004, the day before Kohm was scheduled to auction off Roger’s home, Roger filed an extraordinary motion with the court. Handwritten on three pages of notebook paper, it was a plea for the court to stop the impending foreclosure and property auction. He wrote that he had just filed for a “senior reverse mortgage” that would take “approximately 6 to 8 weeks” to go through. The mortgage, which had earlier been recommended by Kohm, would have been for $174,000.
“Since said real property is currently valued at approximately $325,000 dollars [sic], their [sic] completing said senior reverse mortgage is virtually assured,” Roger scrawled in all caps. “Defendant prays that the court suspend the sale of defendants [sic] property so that defendant can complete said mortgage, pay said judgment and save his home.” Once again, Roger was too late. August scheduled a hearing for January, 2005 on the motion, but the auction went ahead as planned. Held in the August’s courtroom, it attracted 13 approved bidders, which Kohm called “an unusually good turnout.” William S. Hurley of Kihei was the highest bidder, offering $265,000. Of course, where Roger Swanson is concerned, nothing is certain. At a later confirmation hearing, where any new bid at least five percent greater than the last bid was acceptable, local realtor Rodrigo Bumanglag offered $288,000 for the property and got it. Reflecting Maui’s new real estate world, the price was an astonishing $202,000 more than Roger had paid just five years earlier. Still, Roger fought to save his home. On Jan. 4, 2005, the hearing on his motion to suspend foreclosure came up at 8:15 a.m. Everyone was there—except Roger. “[The] clerk stated that Mr. Swanson had contacted the court by telephone this morning at 8:05 am and indicated that he had missed the bus from Kihei,” is how the official trial minutes put it. By 9:21 a.m., when Roger still hadn’t showed up, Judge August denied the motion. A few weeks later August ordered the Maui Police Department “to remove any tenants or occupants” from Kihei Kai Nani #151. Still, Roger and his heaps of garage and squalor remained. Kohm, who had always been concerned about Roger’s welfare, continued to try to help him. “Despite warnings, contact, and help sought from family and the Veterans’ Administration, Defendant Swanson has not taken any steps to move out or get housing,” he wrote in a Mar. 16, 2005 declaration that asked Judge August to immediately transfer $10,000 from the sale proceeds to Swanson’s bank account. “An emergency exists such that the Commissioner would like to make funds available, so that once Swanson is evicted, some security is available.” August agreed, and approved the transfer the same day. The drama reached a crescendo on Mar. 18, two days after the $10,000 transfer was approved. For reasons known only to him, Roger broke into his old apartment. The KKN Association—still relying on its tried and true regulations—called the police and had him thrown out. Putting it mildly, Kohm said that “Roger took over everyone’s lives that week he was evicted.” Roger eventually got a truck and moved his stuff out. The Kihei Kai Nani Association went back to court and got a restraining order, forbidding Roger from coming anywhere near the condo property, though tenants say he still pops up occasionally to ask about his mail. As far as where he’s living now, that’s a mystery. And there doesn’t seem to be anything his family can do about it, except stew in fury. “Talk about a board of directors that is totally inhuman,” Donald Swanson told me. “They think they’re like gods. They were aware of his condition. They gave lip service to him. But they threw him out with a cop on either side of him.” MTW
ONO KINEGRINDS
BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS
The Thing About Ulupalakua Last year’s Chefs’ Challenge, as told by Adam Condon Considered by many to be Maui’s outdoor version of the Iron Chef competition, the Chefs’ Challenge is the Ulupalakua Thing’s most popular event. Last year, Wolfgang Puck’s Spago Chef de Cuisine Adam Condon knew that and decided it was time to enter.
13th Annual Ulupalakua Thing Saturday, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. at Tedeschi Vineyards and Ulupalakua Ranch on Highway 37. Tickets are $15 pre-sale, $20 at the gate, keiki 10 & under get in free. For more info, call 888-808-1036 or visit www.ulupalakuathing.com.
PHOTO: MITCHELL SILVER
Having only come to Maui a couple years before from the Big Island, Condon recognized that the Ulupalakua Thing was “the place to go”—a showcase for Hawaiian farmers, agricultural vendors and the celebrity chefs he’d read about. He was excited to “cook and have fun,” mingle with his new community and maybe even bring a little attention to his restaurant. He looked forward to the challenge of doing something “new, not the norm,” working in an outdoor kitchen he was
unfamiliar with, using surprise ingredients to create several courses on the spot and with the added pressure of doing it all in under an hour. But then it rained. A lot. Event organizers scrambled to make provisions for the change in weather. At one point, Condon was asked if they should still go on, considering the detrimental effect water would have on preparation, ingredients and electrical appliances. “I looked up at the tent,” he said. “It was completely bowed—filled with water—and I said ‘Yeah, let’s do it.’ What more can you ask for than when people throw stuff at you like that? That’s why we’re in the restaurant business!” He started to make wild mushroom agnolotti, but it started raining on the pasta dough. So he made these fat linguini noodles out of squash. Despite forgetting to actually cook the rice he had in the rice cooker for dessert—forcing him to make a mock Fosters with carmelized apple-bananas, raspberry vinaigrette and some sort of lavender infusion—Condon won the Challenge. He thinks it’s because of the elk meatballs he prepared. In the Chefs’ Challenge, there are two heats, each with two competitors. Each chef is allowed to have two assistants, as well as a list of possible pantry ingredients and a couple
And in this corner... hints as to what main items they will be using. Will it be elk meat? Fresh ahi? How about pickled pig’s feet? You never know… Then there are the vendor donated goods, like Olowalu Nui Farm tomatoes, Kula Country Farms’ raspberries, Ono Organic Farms’ apple bananas, Maui Kula lavender and Surfing Goat Dairy’s goat cheese, among countless others. This year’s chefs include: Greg Gaspar from the Maui Prince Hotel, Makena Resort and Damian LaBeaux from Roy’s Kihei Bar & Grill in the first heat, followed by Keith Endo from Vino and Jake Belmonte from The Fairmont Kea Lani. Chef Condon will be back this year to judge,
along with Pamela Young and Guy Hagi. Condon says “freshness is best” and he’ll be looking for “creativity” as well as flavor and use of ingredients. He also has three tips for this year’s contenders: “The microphones are good if you can walk through the dishes. Last year, Scott did that well and I think it was helpful. I wasn’t so good at that. “Don’t try to plan too much. You never know what’s gonna happen. “Simplicity is golden. You want to be able to taste the great products of the local vendors... with as few of the ingredients as you can. Too many can mask the flavor of the dish.” MTW
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DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE
$→$10-$20
CENTRAL MAUI Ale House - Wide selection of food with sports and games all around. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877–9001. $ Aloha Grill - A large assortment of burgers with veggie styles and all the extras. 270 Dairy Road Marketplace, Kahului, 893–0263. $ Ba-Le - French-Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Plus, a large variety of tapioca. 270 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 8772400. $ Bangkok Cuisine - Casual setting featuring exceptional Thai food with plenty of crisp vegetables and fresh seafood. Lunch, dinner or take-out. 395 Dairy Road, Kahului, 893-0026. $ Biwon Restaurant - Fresh and flavorful, authentic Korean food. Open 10 a.m.-10 p.m., lunch and dinner. 752 Lower Main, Wailuku, 244-7788. $ Café Brooklyn - Delicious healthy alternative. Eat in or take out business lunches plate lunches and snacks. Finest organic whole foods use. Open Mon-Fri, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Corner of Market and Main, Wailuku, 244-5950. $ Café Marc Aurel - Offers an elegantly casual menu, including gourmet cheeses, dolmas, tzatziki and an extensive wine-by-the-glass list.
$$→$20-$40
$$$→$40 and up
K→Kama’aina Discount
28 N. Market Street, Wailuku, 244-0852. $$ Cupie’s Drive-In - Local lunch take-out. Open Monday through Saturday. 134 W Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877-3055. $ Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. 425 Koloa St., Kahului, 871-7782. $ Denny’s - Open 24 hours, serving breakfast, lunch or dinner. Omelettes, burgers, salads. 430 Kele St., Kahului, 873-5550. $ Dragon Dragon Chinese Restaurant - Excellent service and fair prices with dishes like Kung Pao Chicken, Crispy Gau Gee Mein and Honey Walnut Prawns. Maui Mall, Kahului, 893-1628. $ Dish - The concept is simple. Every month, the owner and manager decide on a different “menu” of 14 entrees, of which you may select 12 to assemble in their kitchen. Sessions available Wed-Sat. 150 Hana Highway, Kahului, 877-1414. $$ Dunes Restaurant - Adventuresome revisions of local and American breakfast, lunch and dinner favorites. Maui Lani Golf Course, Kahului, 877–7461. $$ Fiesta Time - Superior Mexican taqueria. Order a la carte or combo special with the freshest ingredients. 1132 Lower Main, Wailuku, 249-8463. $
Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.
Gardencafe (Brigit & Bernard's) - Oasis of cozy European and fresh island fish cuisine in the midst of the industrial zone. Lunch, dinner, catering. 335 Ho'ohana St., Kahului, 877-6000. $$ Ichiban Restaurant and Sushi Bar - Breakfast, lunch and dinner featuring modestly priced Japanese and local cuisine. Kahului Shopping Center, 871–6977. $$ Island Saimin Noodle Cafe - Island grinds, chow fun house specialty. Open breakfast, lunch 6 a.m.-3 p.m. 34 Lono Ave., Kahului, 877-4400. International House of Pancakes - (IHOP) - Open for breakfast, specialty pancakes, sandwiches, along with lunch and dinner entrees. Maui Mall, Kahului, 871-4000. $ Little Ceasar Pizza Station - Specialty pizzas along with salads and sandwiches. Located inside of K-mart. 424 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1566. $ Koho Grill & Bar - Comfort food in a casual setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner Open daily at 7 a.m. 275 Kaahumanu Ave., Queen Kaahumanu Center, 8775588. Kozo Sushi - Fast food take out. Open 9 a.m to 7 p.m. Mon through Sat. Sushi platters available. 52 N. Marketplace, Kahului, 243-5696. $ Krispy Kreme - This place is known all over the world for its warm, tasty glazed doughnuts. 433 Kele St., Kahului, 893-0883. $ Mama Ding’s Pasteles - This family owned resturant consist of a variety of breads, coconut papaya bread, apple cinnnamon, Puerto Rican sweet bread. Serving breakfast. Open 7 a.m.-2 p.m. 255 Alamaha, Kahului, 877-5796. $ Manaña Garage - Latin American cuisine with unique and colorful decor. Try the Chicken Tortilla Epozote, vegetarian enchilada and paella. Cool, quaint bar. 33 Lono St., Kahului, 873–0220. $$ Marco’s Grill Deli - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 444 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 877-4446. $$ Maui Coffee Roasters - Ono grinds and freshly roasted coffee in a fun and casual atmosphere makes this the place to take five. 444 Hana Hwy, Kahului, 877–CUPS. $ Maui Beach Hotel - Buffet-style restaurant featuring different foods each night of the week. Features range from Shabu Shabu (tons of meat) to sushi and Japanese. 170 Ka’ahumanu Ave., Kahului, 877-0051. $$ Maui Mix Plate - Traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawaii home. 70 Ka’ahumanu Ave, Kahului, 877-0706. $ Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and island spices. 275 Kaahumanu Ave., Queen Kaahumanu Mall, Kahului, 871-7726. $ Mercado - Latino Mexican market, with produce from Mexico, So. America, Tonga and New Zealand. Homemade tamales. Open M-F 8 a.m.-5:30 p.m. 325 Hukilike St., Kahului, 871-5067. $ Mike’s Restaurant - Authentic Chinese cooking and ono local grinds. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Also offer catering. 1900 E. Main St., Wailuku, 2447888. $ Piñata’s - Fresh and wholesome Mexican food from the kitchen sink burritos to quesadillas. Casual dining and various piñatas available. 395 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877–8707. $ Pulehu BBQ - Local plate lunches with a Southern smokehouse twist. 1500 Lower Main St., Wailuku, 244-4049 or 244-6159. $ Ruby’s - Walk down memory lane at this fabulous ‘50s cafe. Old time American dining morning to night. Queen Ka`ahumanu Center, Kahului, 248-7829. $ Saeng’s Thai Cuisine - Vegetarian, meat and seafood Thai entrees in a casual garden setting. 2119
Vineyard, Wailuku, 244-1567. $$ Saigon Cafe - Wailuku’s hidden secret! Delicious and affordable Vietnamese cuisine with excellent service. 1792 Main, Wailuku, 243-9560. $$ Sam Sushi - A new location and with over 20 years of experience in the food industry. Catering and party trays available. Open Mon-Fri, 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sat, 5-9 p.m. 1951 E. Vineyard St., Wailuku, 249-2420. $$ Sandalwood Golf Course Restaurant - Lunch with a view, served from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. 2500 Honoapiilani Hwy, Waikapu, 242-6000. $$ Sheik’s Restaurant - Local favorites including Loco Moco and Shoyu Chicken. 97 Wakea Ave, Kahului, 877-0121. $ Simply Sweets Bakery - Delicious sweet and savory pastries, rolls, cakes, Mauisadas and deli sandwiches. Open Mon-Thu, 7 a.m.-5:30 p.m.; Fri, 7 a.m.6:30 p.m; Sat, 7 a.m.-4 p.m. 150 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 893-0700. $ Siu’s Chinese Kitchen - Fast food Chinese with daily specials. All entrees are served with rice or noodles. 70 E Kaaumanu Ave., Maui Mall, 871-0828. $ Squeaky’s Family Restaurant - “A Taste of Philadelphia” with real Philly cheesesteak, pan-fried trout, vegetarian meatloaf. Open for breakfast. 197 North Market Street, Wailuku, 244-4100. $ Stillwell’s Bakery & Cafe - Specialty cakes and desserts, breads and pastries, with sandwiches, salads and soups for lunch. Open 6 a.m.-4 p.m. Mon-Sat. 1740 Kaahumanu Ave, Wailuku, 243-2243. $ Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi! Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744. $ Sub Paradise - Maui’s famous subs since 1990. An extensive list of breakfast bagels, sub sandwiches and salads. Open Mon-Fri, 7 p.m.; Sat, 7 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sun, 7 a.m.-4 p.m. 395 E. Dairy Rd, Kahului, 877-8779. Takamiya Market - Plate lunches, homemade corned beef, sashimi, tossed salads. Catering and banquet facility. 359 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-3404. $ Tasty Crust - Local style cuisine for breakfast (try their famous hotcakes!), lunch and dinner. Serving Maui since 1944. 1770 Mill, Wailuku, 244-0845. $ Tiffany’s - Featuring 103 items of local and Asian entrees, Bento boxes, noodles and fish. Featuring DJ and Karaoke. Open 10:30-2 a.m. 1424 Lower Main St. Wailuku, 249-0052. $ Tin Ying Chinese Restaurant - A Hong Kong-style seafood restaurant. They have over 100 menu choices at reasonable prices. Buffet style lunch take-out, as well as sit down dining. 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-4371. $ Tokyo Tei - Lunch and dinner featuring teriyaki beef and fish, tempura, katsu, saimin and more. 1063 E. Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-9630. $ Valley Isle Seafood - Known for their luau stew, along with several choices of seafood. 475 Hukilike St., Kahului, 873-4847. $ Wei Wei BBQ & Noodle House - Very affordable Chinese cuisine, counter-service, delicious noodle dishes. 210 Imikala St., Wailuku, 242-7928. $ Wow-Wee Maui Cafe - Unique candy bars, ice cream shakes, bagels, coffees, sandwiches and soups. Also a Hawaiian menu, kava kava, sushi and oxygen bars. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1414. $
SOUTH MAUI Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Affordable take-out seafood, chicken, ribs—all deep fried tempura style or grilled. 1913 S Kihei Rd., 874-0788. $ Antonio’s - Italian cuisine in a cozy atmosphere, extensive wine list and friendly service. Trust me—try the Tiramisu. 1215 S. Kihei Rd., 875-8800. $$
KAMA’AINA & SEAFOOD
SPECIALS ALL WEEK LONG NIGHTLY SPECIALS
MON-1-1/4 LB LIVE MAINE LOBSTER $18.95 TUES-KAMA’AINA 50% OFF DINNER ENTREES WED-1LB. ALASKAN KING CRAB LEGS $19.95 THUR-14OZ PRIME RIB $16.95 FRI-KAMA’AINA 50% OFF DINNER ENTREES Kama’aina valid w/ HI ID & 17% Gratuity prior to Discount
HAPPY HOUR DAILY 3-6 $3.00 TROPICALS / WELLS $3.25 BUD-BUD LIGHT-COORS LIGHT $1.00 FRESH OYSTER SHOOTERS DOLLAR DOUBLE ALL DAY
14
APRIL 28, 2005
DINING
DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE
$→$10-$20
$$→$20-$40
Aroma D’Italia Ristorante - Southern Italian cuisine and full wine list at reasonable prices. Open Mon-Sat, 5-9 p.m. 1881 S Kihei Rd., 8790133. $$ Ashley’s South Shore Cafe - Affordable breakfast, lunch and dinner with burgers, local plates, fresh island fish, comfort foods and deli sandwiches. 362 Hukulii Pl. (behind Tesoro gas station), Kihei, 874-8600. $ BadaBing! - Home of the Rat Pack Bar. Pizzas, pastas and Italian specialties created with love and a little attitude. $10 wines and kids eat free on Monday and Saturday. Fuhgeddaboudit! 1945 S Kihei Rd., 875-0188. $$ Bamboo Chi - Euro, Asian and Mediterranean atmosphere—perfect for relaxing with friends. Pupus, tapas and antipasto. Live music Fri-Sat in the Wabi-Sabi Lounge. Dinner attire suggested. Open 5 p.m. 100 Wailea Ike Dr, Wailea, 879-4777. $$ Beach ’n Bagels Cafe - Fresh bagels with traditional toppings of flavored cream cheeses, smoked salmon. sandwiches, salads, and smoothees, Island Coffees Latte & Mocha 2395 S. Kihei Rd., Dolphin Plaza, Kihei, 875-7668. $ Big Wave Cafe - Small cafe serving Pacific Rim cuisine, including lobster and sweet corn fritter with furikake tartar sauce, and coconut shrimp with fruit salsa and ginger lilikoi sauce. Open daily. 1215 S Kihei Rd., 891-8688. $ Bistro Molokini - Blend of California and island cuisine, lunch and dinner. Poolside. Grand Wailea, 875-1234. $$ Bocalino Bistro & Bar - Affordably priced Mediterranean cuisine. Open for dinner. Late night menu served until 1 a.m. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 8749299. $$ Blue Marlin Harbor Front Grill & Bar - Get amazing seafood, steaks, sandwiches, pizza and sushi. Eat outdoors overlooking the Ma’alaea Fishing Fleet. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 244-8844. $$ Buzz’s Warf - Steaks, seafood and more, including Sweet Paradise Prawns. Reservations recommended. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 244-5426. $$ Cafe Kiowai - Authentic Japanese fare according to centuries-old tradition. Casual dining in a relaxed garden setting. 5400 Makena Alanui, Maui Prince Hotel, 874--1111.$$ Caffe Ciao - Italian cuisine baked in a Kiawe wood oven. Open for lunch and dinner. Dine outdoors poolside. The Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 875-4100. $$ Capische? - Contemporary Italian with a twist and an extensive wine list. Commanding ocean views from every table. Wailea Diamond Resort, 879–2224. $$$ Cyberbean Internet Cafe - Gourmet coffee, espressos, cappucinos, lattes, sandwiches, smoothies and salads. 1881 S Kihei, 879-4799. $ Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. 2439 S Kihei Rd., 875-7782. $ Denny’s - Open 24 hours for breakfast, lunch or dinner with omelets, burgers, salads. Open 24 hours. 2763 S. Kihei Rd., 879-8600. $ Dina’s Sandwitch - Deli sandwiches, Salads & Hot Dogs, homade Potato Salad, Pasta Salad, healthy garden fresh salads & Saimin. Open 11a.m.- 10 p.m. 145 N Kihei Rd, 879-3262. $ Enrique’s Restaurant - Authentic Mexican food. Fajitas, seafood, enchiladas, tamales, burritos and vegetarian items. Open Mon-Sat, 10 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sun, 10 a.m.-8 p.m. 2395 S. Kihei Rd., 875-2910. $ Fernando’s - Authentic Mexican food. Open 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. daily. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 879-9952. $ Ferraro’s - Gourmet Italian cuisine oceanfront with live violin and guitar, outdoor kiawe-woodburning oven, all-day lunches and cucina rustica dinners. Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000. $$$ Fiesta Time - Superior Mexican taqueria. Order a la carte or combo special with the freshest ingredients. 300 Ma’alaea Rd., Ma’alaea, 244-5862. $ Five Palms Restaurant - Local produce and fish featuring Pacific Rim seafood. Breakfast, lunch, pupus and dinner. Open 8 a.m.-9 p.m. 2960 S. Kihei Rd., 879–2607. $$ Harry’s Sushi Bar - Japanese cuisine with fresh and delicious sushi. Open 5 p.m.-12 a.m. 100 Ike Drive, Wailea, 879-7677. $$ Hawaiian Moons Natural Foods - Salad Bar goes beyond all others. Healthy natural foods. Open 7 days 8 a.m. - 9 p.m. 2411 S. Kihei Road 875-4356. $ Horhitos Mexican Cantina - Burritos, salads, appetizer and “food for gringos,” too. Located next to Hapa’s Nightclub. Open 5 p.m. to 2 a.m. Mon.-Sat. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 891MEXI. $ Hula Moon - Enjoy breakfast, lunch, dinner or a champagne Sunday brunch with an open air tropical setting and spectacular ocean views.
LETTERS
NEWS
COVER STORY
SURF
$$$→$40 and up
K→Kama’aina Discount
Featuring fresh Hawaiian fish. 3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-7831. $$$ Humuhumunukunukuapua’a - Hawaiian and Polynesian cuisine oceanside. Grand Wailea Resort, 875-1234 ext. 4900. $$$ Jawz Tacos - Island-style tacos and burritos, including choice of vegetarian, mahi mahi, ono, shrimp, chicken or steak. Impressive salsa bar and the taco salads are da bomb! 1280 S Kihei Rd., 874-TACO. $ Joy’s Place - “Smart eating” featuring organic foods which are low fat, low salt and wheat free. Open Mon thru Sat, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. 1993 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9258. $ Kai Ku Ono - A tapas-style menu, where everything is a la carte, special late night menu and sushi. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner with bar and lounge area. 2511 S Kihei Rd., 875–1007. $$ Keoki’s Fish N’ Chips - Ono Fish & Chips. Open for Breakfast 7 a.m. Kukui Mall, next to Starbucks 8911400. $ Kihei Caffe - Affordable breakfast and lunch with lanai seating, hearty portions, tasty sandwiches, huli chicken and fresh fish. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., 879-2230. $ Life’s a Beach - Food and drinks in a fun atmosphere. Nachos, burritos, prime rib and grilled mahi mahi and lunch specials. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., 891–8010. $ Lobster Cove - Seafood, steak and lobster at its best in a relaxed and casual atmosphere. Open 5 p.m. to midnight daily. 100 Ike Dr., Wailea, 879–7677. $$$ Longhi’s Wailea - Seafood, meat and pasta entrees with many not listed on the menu. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891–8883. $$$ LuLu’s - Ribs, burgers, chicken wings, Black ‘n Blue Ahi and more in a fun, upbeat tiki-fied atmosphere with a huge bar and open-air deck. 1941 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9944. $ Ma`alaea Grill - Reasonably priced fine dining overlooking the harbor from the Maui Ocean Center. Ma`alaea Harbor Village, 243–2206. $$ Ma’alaea Waterfront Restaurant - Seafood and Continental cuisine. Open for dinner daily from 5 p.m. Milowai Condominium, 50 Hauoli St., 244-9028. $$ Marco’s South Side Grill - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 1445 S Kihei Rd., 874–4041. $$ Maui Espresso & Shave Ice - Finest Hawaiian shave ice, a full service coffee kiosk, fruit smoothies and shakes. 2439 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0414. $ Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and spices from the islands. 2411 S. Kihei Road, Kamaole Beach Center, 879-5005. $ Mulligan’s On the Blue - Maui’s authentic Irish pub, plenty o’Irish food, whiskey and beer. Breakfast served till 3 p.m 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874–1131. $ Nick’s Fishmarket - Fine dining in open air and elegance with amazing seafood dishes and fresh fish. Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 879–7224. $$$ OutBack Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimp-onthe-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in a casual and lively atmosphere. Open 4-10 p.m. 281 Pi’ikea Ave, Kihei 879-8400. $$ Pita Paradise - Good food served fast. Serving up a mean Mediterranean-style “gyro,” salads and wraps, with outdoor lanai. Kihei Kalama Village Center, 875–7679. $ Royal Thai Cuisine - Thai food with a large selection of vegetarian dishes. Open for lunch (Mon-Fri) and dinner (nightly). 1280 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0813. $ Roy’s Bar & Grill - Mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious and upbeat atmosphere. Open nightly from 5:30 to 10 p.m. Fine dining, reservations recommended. Piilani Shopping Center, 303 Piikea Ave., Kihei, 891-1120. $$$ Sansei Restaurant - Japanese-based Pacific Rim dining, sushi bar and late night menu. Award-winning cuisine, early bird and late night special. 1881 S. Kihei Rd., 879–0004. $$ K Sarento’s on the Beach - Contemporary dining near the water’s edge. Italian cuisine, very romantic. Private VIP table available. 2980 S. Kihei Rd., 875–7555. $$$ Seawatch - Hawaii regional cuisine utilizing the freshest island fish and produce. Open for breakfast and lunch 8 a.m to 3 p.m, dinner 5:30 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Drive, Wailea, 875-8080. $$ Shabu Shabu Toji - Healthy and delicious Japanese style fondue. Beef, pork or seafood, and veggies. Open for lunch Wed-Fri; dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. nightly. 1280 S. Kihei Rd., 875-8366. $ Spago - Gourmet cuisine as presented by worldfamous chef-owner Wolfgang Puck. Oceanfront dining at its finest! Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000. $$$ Spices - Steak, seafood and more! Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8860. $$$ Stella Blues Cafe - Healthy, quality food in a casual, homestyle setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner with daily specials. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 874-3779. $$ South Shore Tiki Lounge - Killer burgers, sausage sandwiches, mai-tais and pizza. Awesome outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. Open 11 a.m.-2 a.m., serving food 'till midnight! Kihei Kalama Village,
DINING
DAY&NIGHT
A&E
FILM
874-6444. $ Sports Page Bar & Grill - Over 100 menu items, including half-pound burgers and deli sandwiches, with 24 TVs and a full bar. Open 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 2411 S. Kihei Rd, 879-0602. $ Sunset Mixed Grill - Local, Japanese and Chinese cusine, along with some Korean dishes. Entrees come with two side dishes. Open 10 a.m.-9 p.m. BYOB. 2395 S. Kihei Rd. 891-1991. $ Tastings Wine Bar & Grill - Savory and sweet nibbles, such as house smoked duck breast on wilted spinach with toasted hazelnuts, grilled whole Moi with jasmine rice and ginger braised bok choy, along with an excellent wine list. Open Tue-Sun, 5 p.m. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 879-8711. $$ Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Cafe - Relaxed island luxury in ambience and cuisine, with ocean views and live music. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. $$ Tony Roma’s - Famous for ribs, barbequed chicken and onion ring loaf, along with daily special. 1819 S. Kihei Road, 875-1104. $$ Vietnamese Cuisine - Hawaiian Opakapaka filet, soft shell crab, New York steak. Open 10:30 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Azeka Place I, Kihei, 875-2088. $$ Yorman’s By The Sea - Southern Pacific cuisine with a blend of Louisiana Cajun and tropical flare. Open 5-10 pm. Music nightly. 760 S. Kihei Rd, Kihei 874-8385. $$ K
UPCOUNTRY Anthony’s Coffee Company - A full espresso bar, hot and cold sandwiches, ice cream. Make sure to stop in for a great box lunch to go! 90 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-8340. $ Aha’Aina - Ocean front dinning Featuring a delicious chili pork burrito and a large variety of omelets. Island fish, chicken Katsu. Open for breakfast and lunch only: Tue-Sat, 7a.m.-2 p.m.; Sun, 7 a.m.-1 p.m. 7 Aewa Place, Pukalani, 572-2395. $$ Café 808 - Local diner style serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open daily from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. 4566 Lower Kula Rd., Kula, 878-6874. $ Cafe Del Sol - Sandwiches and fresh fish, daily special. Open for breakfast and lunch: 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. 3620 Baldwin Ave, Makawao, 572-4877. $ Café Des Amis - Charming cafe with delicious sweet and savory crepes and Mediterranean fare. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-6323. $ Café Mambo - International bistro featuring Mediterranean and Mexican cuisine with Moorish influences.BYOB. 30 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8021. $ Cakewalk Paia Bakery - High quality baked goods, sandwiches and specialty cakes. 100 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8770. $ Casanova - First class service, first class food. Fine Italian dining at night and Makawao’s favorite deli by day. 1188 Makawao Ave., 572–0220. $$ Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon - Hankering for some grub? Charley’s serves it hearty and healthy from breakfast to dinner and beyond. 142 Hana Hwy., Pa`ia, 579–9453. $ K Colleen’s - 1940s-style urban bistro serving breakfast, lunch and dinner from 6 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. daily. Haiku Cannery, 575-9211. $$
PAI A Fi s h M ar k et Restaurant
Tides & times Tide-times set for Honolulu - subtract as follows: Kahului: 1hr 41min Hana: 1hr 23 min Makena: 0hr 32min Kihei/Ma`alaea: 0hr 22 min Lahaina: 0hr 40 min
28 Sun R 6:02A Thur Sun S 6:56P
L 3:02A +0.1 H 6:34A +0.2
L 11:44A -0.2 H 8:01P +2.1
29
Sun R 6:02A Fri Sun S 6:56P
L 4:28A +0.1 H 8:16A +0.2
L 12:42P +0.0 H 9:10P +2.0
30
Sun R 6:01A Sat Sun S 6:56P
L 5:30A +0.0 L 2:11P +0.2 H 10:25A +0.3 H 10:18P +1.9
1 Sun R 6:00A Sun Sun S 6:57P
L 6:12A -0.1 L 4:02P +0.3 H 11:52A +0.6 H 11:20P +1.8
2 Sun R 6:00A Mon Sun S 6:57P
L 6:45A -0.2
3 Sun R 5:59A Tue Sun S 6:58P
H 12:13A +1.7 H 1:33P +1.2 L 7:13+A -0.2 L 6:57P +0.3
4 Sun R 5:59A Wed Sun S 6:58P
H 11:59A +1.5 H 2:13P +1.5 L 7:38+A -0.3 L 8:04P +0.3
H 12:48P +0.9 L 5:39P +0.3
100 HANA HIGHWAY, PAIA
579-8030 DA KINE CALENDAR
THE GRID
CLASSIFIEDS
EMPLOYEE OF THE
WEEK AS TOLD TO GABRIELLE POCCIA
Nori Crist Baker, Kihei Caffe I was a junior in high school when I moved from Redwood City, California five years ago and I have been in Kihei pretty much ever since. I moved here with my parents and could not believe how nice it is here. I have always been a bit of a wuss for the cold and the change in climates is great. I like being able to ride my bike everywhere. I have worked at the Kihei Caffé for about two and a half years. I started out as a food runner but gradually worked my way to running the register and in the past two months I have begun baking. We did not have a steady baker at the time and so I volunteered to learn how to make the pastries for the café. I have always baked with my mom and so I had some experience. The first day I made the cinnamon buns we got really good feedback and I have been helping out since. Now I come in early in the morning and bake until the rush starts. Then I help out on the floor. When we close I go back to preparing for the next day. We have a really different mix of people that work at the café. There are all types of people of all different ages. We do not have one particular manager but we all look out for each other. That makes our jobs pretty equal. My favorite part about the job is watching a customer’s reaction to the baked goods. It makes me feel good when someone enjoys what I have made. Hotels have asked us about buying bulk pastries, but we don’t have the time to make them. We stay pretty busy making the fresh baked goods for the café. MTW
MAUI TIME WEEKLY
APRIL 28, 2005
15
DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE
$→$10-$20
Fresh Mint - Vietnamese vegetarian cuisine including Summer Rolls, Spicy Lemongrass Soup and Soy Fish in Clay Pot. Open daily 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Catering and take-out available. 115 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9144. $ Hali`imaile General Store - Gourmet dining in a charming atmosphere with food from Chef Beverly Gannon’s award-winning menu. 900 Hali`imaile Rd, 572–2666. $ Hana Hou Cafe - Hawaiian homestyle cooking with aloha-filled ambience and local musicians. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-2661. $ Island Tacos - Taco stand with fresh, made-toorder fish, beef and chicken tacos. Daily from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery. $ Jacque’s Northshore Bistro - Tropical yet festive atmosphere, with a sushi bar, indoor and lanai dining. 120 Hana Hwy, Pa`ia, 579–8844. $$ Jameson’s Grill & Bar - Featuring fine steaks, fresh local fish and seafood, and of course, baked artichoke. 200 Kapalua Dr., Kapalua, 669-5653. $$$ Kimura Saimin Shop - Casual atmosphere, simple, affordable menu with fresh ingredients done right! 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-5228. $ Kitada’s - Saimin for breakfast is a standard. Teriyaki beef, hamburger steak, tofu and teriyaki all available. 3617 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 572–7241. $ Kula Lodge & Restaurant - Upcountry’s family-style restaurant with sweeping views of the island. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Haleakala Highway, 878-1535. $ La Provence - French-style bistro and patisserie with lanai, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open Wed thru Sun, 8:30 a.m. to 9 p.m. 3158 Lower Kula Rd., 878-1313. $$ Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Sun thru Thu; 6 a.m. to midnight Fri and Sat. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. $ Lynne’s Cafe - Affordable homestyle local food including breakfast, plate lunch, chow fun and more! Catering available. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-9363. $ Makawao Steak House - Classic and comfortable menu with daily fish preparations and salad bar. 3612 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 572-8711. $$ Mama’s Fish House - Fresh island fish with fresh local ingredients at “Maui’s favorite restaurant.” 799 Poho Pl., Kuau, 579–8448. $$$ Maui’s Best Tamales & Local Food Authentic, fresh and tasty Mexican cuisine along with local favorites. 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani Square, 573-2998. $ Milagros Food Co. - South American cuisine with an island influence. Best people watching spot in Pa`ia! Extensive tequila menu and delicious daily special. 3 Baldwin St., Paia, 579–8755. $ Moana Bakery & Cafe - Pacific Rim dining for vegetarians and meat eaters. Bakery provides wonderful goodies for the sweet tooth. 71 Baldwin Ave., Pa`ia, 579–9999. $ Pa`ia Fish Market - By serving fresh local
$$→$20-$40
$$$→$40 and up
K→Kama’aina Discount
Hawaiian fish daily, they are the hot spot for seafood lovers without the upscale pocket. 2A Baldwin Ave., Pa`ia, 579–8030. $ Pauwela Cafe & Bakery - Healthy, low fat deli cuisine and daily fresh baked goods. Open 7 a.m.-2:30 p.m. 375 W. Kuiaha Rd., Haiku, 575-9242. $ Polli’s Mexican Restaurant - Paniolo country’s premier Mexican cantina, with nachos, burritos, ensaladas and more! 1202 Makawao Ave., 572-7808. $ SandBar & Grill - Casual contemporary island cuisine, featuring salads, kiawe grill burgers, sandwiches and lobster tacos. Full bar, happy hour everyday 4-6 p.m. Open daily from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 89 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-8742. $ Vasi Gourmet - The best cakes and pastries around, along with delicious salads, quiches and gyros with a variety of teas. Open 7 a.m.-8 p.m. 810 Kokomo Road, Haiku Marketplace, 575-9588. $ Veg Out - Vegan and vegetarian food, from Mexican, Italian and Far East influences. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-5320. $
WEST MAUI A&J Kitchen, Deli & Bakery - Choose from American, Hawaiian, Korean and Chinese cuisines. Bakery with cakes and cookies. Lahaina Center, 667–0623. $ Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Seafood, chicken, ribs, deep fried tempura style or grilled. Great food great prices. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, 667-9009. $ Aloha Mixed Plate - Experience the traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawaii home. 1285 Front St., Lahaina, 661-3322. $ Athens Greek Restaurant - Affordable and authentic gyros, shish kebab, falafel and more. Ya’Sou! Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-4300. $ The Bakery - Freshly baked breads and pastries. Soup and sandwiches available. 991 Limahana Pl., Lahaina, 667-9062. $ Ba-Le - French Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Wide variety of tapioca. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-5566. $ Bamboo Bar & Grill - Vietnamese, Thai and Japanese sushi. Delivery available, great daily special. Open late with full bar, pool tables. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4051. $ K Banyan Tree - “Eclectic Pacific cuisine with a Hawaiian twist.” Lodge atmosphere, ocean views. Ritz Carlton Kapalua, 669–6200. $$$ Basil Tomato’s Italian Grill - Specializing in Northern Italian cuisine. Come in for the ambience, stay for the delightful dining experience. 2780 Kekaa Dr., Kaanapali, 662-3210. $$ BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Deep-dish specialty pizzas and homemade Pizookies with live music nightly. Overlooking Lahaina Town with ocean view. 730 Front St., 661-0700. $ Blue Lagoon - Casual dining with local grinds and bar, surrounded by waterfalls and palm trees. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661–8141. $ Breakwall Cafe - Serving breakfast, coffee, sandwiches, salads, smoothies. Open everyday 7 a.m.-2 p.m. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-7220. $ Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. - Fine Southern foods, with “Forrest Gump” movie memorabilia and logo
Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.
wear in a lively, casual atmosphere. 889 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3111. $$ Cafe O’Lei - Oceanfront dining featuring light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunch and dinner. Delicious salads and focaccia sandwiches. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661–9491. $$ Cafe Sauvage - Gourmet, hearty, satisfying fare in an unpretentious setting. Extensive beer and wine menu, after-dinner cordials, and desserts! 844 Front St., Lahaina, 661–7600. $$ K Canoes - Casual yet elegant dining serving Polynesian style steaks, and seafood. Lunch 11 a.m.2:30 p.m., dinner 5-9 p.m. 1450 Front St., Lahaina, 661–0937. $$ Captain Dave Fish & Chips - Classic baskets of fish and chips. Open daily. 126 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-6700. $ Castaway Cafe - Beachside, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Soups, salads, pasta. Maui Kaanapali Villas & Resort, 661-9091. $ Cilantro - Fresh Mexican Grill island fish, tacos and burritos. Mexican food beyond the border. 170 Papalaua St., Lahaina, 667-5444. $ Chez Paul Restaurant - Fine dining French cuisine, open for dinner only. Romantic setting. Call for reservations. 820 Olowalu Rd., Olowalu, 661-3843. $$$ K China Boat - The best Mandarin Szechwan cuisine on Maui, open for lunch and dinner. 4474 L. Honoapiilani Road, Kahana Gateway Shopping Center, 669-5089. $ CJ’s Deli & Diner - Reasonably priced comfort foods like Reuben sandwiches, pot roast, freshly baked pies and more. Open daily. 2580 Kekaa Dr., Fairway Shops, Kaanapali, 667-0968. $ Coconut Grove - Steak, seafood and other island favorites. Next to Lahaina Cannery Mall. Open 5:30-9 p.m. 1312 Front Street, Lahaina, 661-5648. Comercial Mexicana Store - Authentic Mexican food, Tamales, enchilads, tacos, soups, rice and beans Open everyday 10 a.m.-9 p.m. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina, 661-6193. $ Compadres Bar & Grill - Western cooking with a Mexican accent. Oceanview dining and Margarita bar. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-7189. $ Cool Cat Cafe - 1950s-style diner with lanai. Delicious burgers and sandwiches, huge salads and fountain desserts. Lahaina Wharf Center, 667-0908. $ K Curry-In-A-Hurry - Curry dishes that are delightful and delicious in alternative vegetarian eating. Open Tue-Sat, 11:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, 661-4370. $ David Paul’s Lahaina Grill - Fine Pacific Rim cuisine in the intimate dining room on the ground floor of the Lahaina Inn. 127 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 667–5117. $$$ K Dollie’s Pub & Cafe - Pizza, sandwiches, salads and full bar. Open daily 11 a.m. to midnight. 4310 L. Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana Manor Shops, 669-0266. $ Feast At Lele - A royal tour of the cuisine of Polynesian sharing the spotlight with music and dance from four Pacific islands. 505 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-5353. $$$ Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie - Maui’s own restaurant brewery, with rotisserie grill, featuring steak, seafood and ambience. Also, late-night menu
served until 1:30 a.m.! 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana, 669-3474. $$ Gaby’s Pizzeria - Casual Italian dining with pizza and pasta from $6-$25. Open 11 a.m. to 12 a.m. daily. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8112. $ Gazebo Restaurant - Full breakfast and lunch menu, casual atmosphere and beautiful oceanside setting. 5315 Lower Honoapiilani Rd, Napili, 669-5621. $ Gerard’s - Fine French dining in downtown Lahaina. Rich, flavorful yet light foods await your taste buds. 174 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 661–8939. $$$ Giovani’s Tomato Pie Ristorante - Fine Italian dining located. Open for dinner. 2291 Kaanapali Prkwy, 661-3160. $$ Hard Rock Cafe - Good American food at decent prices amongst rock ‘n roll memorabilia. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667–7400. $ Hawaiian Village Coffee - Old-Hawaiian styled coffeehouse with pastries, smoothies, salads and sandwiches, quiche. Open 5:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. daily. 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana Gateway Shopping Center, 665-1114. $ Hecocks - Italian restaurant and cocktail lounge oceanside. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8810. $$ K House of Saimin - Ono homemade saimin, chicken sticks, and Haupia pie are just some of the local favorites here. Old Lahaina Center, 667–7572. $ Hula Grill - Barefoot bar and beachside dining, 1940s style. Menu is a seafood lovers’ delight. Whaler’s Village, Kaanapali, 667–6636. $$ i`o - Pacific Rim cuisine among awesome sunset views, and indoor or outdoor dining. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661–8422. $$$ Island Taco - The best soft shell tacos ever! Beef, fish, pork or chicken, served with black beans, fresh cabbage, cheese, onions and jalapenos. Open very late night, next to Paradice Bluz. 744 Luakini St., Lahaina. $ Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Coffee bar and cafe with great food, eclectic atmosphere, lounge ambience. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787. $ Jonny’s Burger Joint - Great burgers, as well as Mexican food, salads and fried items, served until midnight, with bar and pool table. 2395 Honoapiilani Hwy, Ka’anapali, 661-4500. $ Kahuna Kabob - Healthy food, low prices! Soups, brown rice, veggies and kabobs And they deliver. Lahaina Marketplace, 661–9999. $ K Kimo’s - Fresh fish, prime rib, and their famous Hula Pie, oceanside dining. Live entertainment daily. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661–4811. $$ Kobe - Japanese Steak House and Oku’s Sushi Bar, featuring teppanyaki cooking and fabulous sushi. Dinner nightly from 5:30-10 p.m., Sushi 5:30-11:30 p.m. 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 667-5555. $$ Lahaina Coolers - Off the beaten path surf bistro. Good food, good quality, late night menu. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–7082. $ Lahaina Fish Co. - Chef’s signature Pacific Rim specialties prepared with fresh island fish. Dine on the oceanside lanai. 831 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3472. $$ Leilani’s On The Beach - Relaxed beachfront dining, specializing in fresh seafood and Pacific Rim cuisine. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-4495. $$
Open for breakfast am & Lunch ‘til pm Mon Sat
Special
Buy 1 Get 1
50%
FF Dinner SO pecial Kihei Kalama Village 1945 S. Kihei Road • 875–0188
877- 4400 APRIL 28, 2005
nc FREE Lu
Italian Restaurant
34 LONO AVE. KAHULUI
16
t1 Buy 1 Ge h
Must mention MauiTime for Discount Offers Good ‘til May 31st, 2005
Seafood + Pasta = Fuhgeddaboudit!
Open Every Day For Lunch & Dinner 11AM to 10PM
DINING
DININGLISTINGS Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. MonSun 612 Front St. Lahaina 661-4213. $ Longhi’s - Elegant fine dining, freshest ingredients, pasta, seafood and steaks. 888 Front St., Lahaina, 667–2288. $$$ MaLa - Oceanfront dining and organic whole grains cusine. From clams and lobster soup to chicken tikka, beet and goat cheese salads. Full bar. 1307 Front St., Lahaina, 667-9394. $$ Mama’s Ribs & Rotisserie - Serving ribs and roasted chicken, BBQ baked beans, coleslaw and macaroni salad. Napili Plaza, 665–6262. $ Mango Cafe - Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. American cusine, along with some local favorites. Full bar Nightly specials. 7:30 a.m.-10 p.m. 2290 Ka’anapali Parkway, 667-1929. $$ K Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with char-grilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and spices from the islands. Lahaina Square, 661-8883; Napili Square, 665-0222. $ Mercado - Latino Mexican Market, with produce from Mexico, S. america,Tonga & New Zealand. Homade Tamales.Open M-F 8-5:30pm 3636 L. Honoapiilani Hwy Ste #6 Honokawi, 665-5900. $ Moose McGillycuddy’s - Great value, large portions, all you can eat specials, merry atmosphere and a large bar. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758. $ Mr. Sub Sandwiches - Specialty sandwiches made to order, with salads and homemade soups. 129 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-5683. $ Nachos Grande - Fresh Mexican food, fast. Vegetarian, too. Honokowai Marketplace, 662–0890. $ Nalu Sunset Bar & Sushi - Sushi rolls, sashimi, various Japanese appetizer, sandwiches and more. Maui Marriott, Kaanapali, 667-1200 ext. 51. $$ Okazuya Deli - Quality Japanese plate lunch. The best lemon caper mahi mahi and Okinawan potato tempura ever! Open 10 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. and 4:30 to 9 p.m. 3600 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Honokowai, 665-0512. $ Ono’s Surf Bar & Grill - Casual poolside dining. Now featuring reasonably priced tapasHawaiian style menu for dinner. 6:30 a.m.-10 p.m. The Westin Maui, Ka’anapali, 667-2525. $ Outback Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimpon-the-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in a casual and lively atmosphere. Open 4-10 p.m. nightly. 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kahana, 665-1822. $$ Pacific’O - Elegant oceanfront award-winning contemporary Pacific cuisine. Live jazz on weekends. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4341. $$$ Penne Pasta - Mark Ellman’s inexpensive Italian bistro with homestyle pasta, pizza and salad. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–6633. $ Pho Saigon 808 - Vietnamese cuisine, Saigon steaks, vegetarian delight. Open 7 days a week. 658 Front St., Wharf Cinema Center, 661-6628. $ Pioneer Inn - Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily, with live entertainment nightly. 659 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. $ Pad Thai - Delicious Påd Thai, among many other items. Open daily. 658 Front St., Lahaina, $
“WHO HAS
Pizza Paradiso - Award-winning pasta dishes, tossto-order salads, big fat Greek gyros, homemade tiramisu and panna cotta. Honokowai Marketplace, 667-2929. $ Plantation House Restaurant - HawaiianMediterranean cuisine. Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily. 2000 Plantation Club Dr., Kapalua, 669-6299. $ Reilley’s - Known for their choice award-winning beef. Gourmet steaks and seafood. Open at 5:30 p.m. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Kahana, 667-7477. $$$ Roy’s Bar & Grill - This fine dining restaurant has mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious upbeat atmosphere. Open nightly from 5:30-10 p.m. 4405 Honoapi’ilani Hwy., Kahana, 669-6999. $$$ Rusty Harpoon Restaurant and Tavern Quench thirst, satiate hunger and watch sports. Large parties welcome. Whalers Village, Kaanapali, 661–3123. $$ Ruth’s Chris Steak House - USDA prime steak and fine wines. Dinner served nightly. 5-10 p.m. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8815. $$$ Sansei Seafood Restaurant and Sushi Bar D.K. Kodama has combined the highest quality sushi bar infused with Hawaii’s cultural flavors. 115 Bay Drive, Kapalua, 669–6286. $$ K Sea House Restaurant - Looking out over incredible Napili Bay, dining is an amazing experience here under the direction of Chef Michael Gallagher. 5900 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Hwy., Napili, 669–1500. $$ Smoke House - Delicious barbeque, ribs, chicken, sandwiches and hamburgers along with a full bar. Open 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m. 927 Wainee St., Lahaina, 667-7005. $ Spats Trattoria - Step into old Northern Italy. Tables are private and the antipasto serves two. Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali, 667–4727. $$$ Sports Club Kahana Grill - Upscale, healthy restaurant inside Sports Club Kahana. Breakfast, lunch and takeout. 4327 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Rd., Kahana, 669-3539. $$ Sunrise Cafe - Casual and cozy outdoor lanai, serving American food from 6 a.m. to 4 p.m. daily. 693 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8558. $ Swan Court - One of the top 10 romantic restaurants in the world, with an extensive list of contemporary fine wines. Hyatt Regency, Ka’anapali, 667–4727. $$$ Take Sushi - Open late night for late night sushi lovers. Full menu and daily special. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4051. $ Terrace Restaurant - Open from 6:30-11 a.m. serving breakfast only. Elegant dining, buffet-style rotating menu ranging from “Breakfast on the Farm” to “Hawaiian Plantation-Style Breakfast.” Ritz Carlton, Kapalua, 669-6200. $$$ Thai Chef - Thai food like you’ve never had it, with curry, Pad Thai, summer rolls and more. Old Lahaina Center, 667–2814. $ Tropica - Oceanfront dining on Ka’anapali Beach, features sizzling steaks, fresh fish, prepared in variety of styles. Specialty entrees, appetizers and deserts. Open 5:30-9:30 p.m. Westin Kaanapali, 667–2525. $$ Vino - Comfort and contemporary cuisine featuring fresh pasta and an extensive wine list. Open for dinner nightly from 5:30 p.m. Village Course Clubhouse, Kapalua, 661-8466. $$$ Vinny’s Pizza - Authentic New York style pizza, calzones and heros. Open daily, delivery 11 a.m.-10 p.m. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, Lahaina, 661-6773. $
SAID A GREAT MEAL TO BE EXPENSIVE ”
Chef M a rk E llma n’s
Beer & Wine Pastas, Salads, Pizzas, Sandwiches and Nightly Seafood Specials We now have Brown Rice Pasta! Wheat & Gluten Free! 50¢ extra / Cooked to order so it takes a few minutes longer
661-6633 • 180 Dickenson Street • Lahaina Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner Open Daily: 7:30am - 1am Dinner Served 5pm - 10pm Full Bar - Late Night 10pm - close
Homestyle New American Comfort Food Vegetarian Selections
Locally Raised Grass Fed Beef
Fresh Local Fish
Homemade Desserts
WHERE PEOPLE & FOOD OF GOOD TASTE COME TOGETHER! In Our New Location - Azeka II - 874-3779 LETTERS
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★NCO DE MAYO GEST R A L E TH
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N! W O T INMAY 5TH , PATRHTUY A RSD Y
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A IL U Q E T F O N IO T C E L E MAUI’S LARGEST S
! C I S U M L★IVE WITH
G G O D L E & I H KAPAKAARTS AT 4PM ST
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CUERVO & BUD GIRLS! IN THE FLESH 0 0 0 . 3 $A3R.G5ARITA $3.50 $3.50 $ SAUZA - CONMEMORATIVO & HORNITOS S A N O R DON JULIO - SILVER & ANEJO O
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SPECIALS
$3.50 TRES GENERACIONES - SILVER & ANEJO
C Y A D L L A
LAHAINA CANERY MALL FRONT STREET 661-7189 18
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‘Summer of the Pelvic Bone’ Friday, 10 p.m. at Casanova [MUSIC] Two years ago, the Los Angeles Times declared a “summer of the pelvic bone,” based on the latest trend in low-rise jeans. Since then, the midline has continued dipping and the butt crack has become the new cleavage. Levi’s introduced their new “Too Superlow” jeans for women, as well as their “Dangerously Low” and “Offender” lines for men, while the brand Gasoline came up with an ingenious low-rise jean with built-in bungee cord to adjust the drop as needed. How low are YOU willing to go? At Casanova this Friday, if you don your deviantly down waistlines, you can not only enter the contest for best low-risers—with $300 in cash prizes and from the Enchantress Boutique, as well as The Love Shack—but also, you’re eligible for some $2 drink specials and you can significantly reduce the $10 cover charge down to a mere $5 to get in. DJ Arge will spin Latin, Merengue, Cumbia House music and Reggaeton, along with live conga accompaniment by Elan Rae. [SAMANTHA CAMPOS]
SEND YOUR LISTINGS & PHOTOS FOR DA KINE CALENDAR TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM OR FAX (808) 661-0446 LETTERS
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APRIL 28, 2005
19
ThIS WEEK’S PICKS by Samantha Campos
More of the Ulupalakua Thing
Healthy Hawai’i Saturday, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. at Maui Mall
Saturday, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. at Ulupalakua Ranch & Tedeschi Winery
[EXPO] This is an annual smorgasbord of alternative healing products, practices and therapies. Over 50 exhibits, as well as psychic readings and fitness demos will take place throughout the day. But the best part is at noon, when the Arm Wrestling Contest commences! You know, they just don’t do enough arm wrestling in bars anymore… Pictured is last year’s “Strongest Woman” Teira Shaw, along with Mr. USA 1990 Aaron Baker. Free. For information, call 2817645 or 669-9091.
[FESTIVAL] Ah, the food! But there’s more to it than the Chefs’ Challenge (see pg. 13). Maui’s most prestigious and anticipated agricultural trade show also features the Malama Aina Plant Competition, lei-making and flower arrangement contests, parade, food vendors (with samplings—yeehaw!), cooking demos (more food!) and live music from Eric Gilliom and Willie K. More importantly, this popular upcountry event is a chance to promote the many splendiferous gifts of Hawai’i—from horticulture and agriculture to arts, crafts and health products. Plus, did we mention the food?! Tickets are $15 pre-sale, $20 at the gate. For more info, call 888808-1036 or visit their website at www.ulupalakuathing.com.
THURSDAY
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➤➤➤➤➤FRIDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SATURDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SUN
DA KINE CALENDAR
Rick Olson Live!
Monumental Sunday, 3 p.m.; 5 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. at the MACC’s McCoy Theater [FUNDRAISER] David Brower was probably America’s greatest and best-known conservationist in the 20th century. He led the battles against damming Dinosaur National Monument, the Yukon and the Grand Canyon itself. He successfully fought for national parks in the Cascades, Alaska, Point Reyes, Kings Canyon and a half dozen other places. Yet there’s a certain irony to screening the outstanding documentary Monumental, which chronicles Brower’s “Fight for Wild America,” as a fundraiser for the Sierra Club’s Maui Chapter. After all, though Brower was the Sierra Club’s first executive director—a post he held for 17 years—the Club ousted him in 1969 for being “arrogant,” “financially reckless” and ultimately too militant and radical. Brower stayed a member of the Sierra Club Board of Directors until he resigned in protest in May of 2000. “They’re not spending enough time worrying about what is happening to the Earth,” he told CNN. “They’re worried more about their standing rules and what’s happening in committees.” Brower died six months later at the age of 88. One of his last wishes was that the Sierra Club “be more bold.” Since his death, the federal government has approved drilling in ANWR, gutted environmental laws and basically declared open season on the American wilderness. I’d say that Sierra Club showings of films like Monumental are long overdue. Tickets cost $10. For more information, call the Maui Film Festival at 572-3456. [ANTHONY PIGNATARO]
Saturday, 3 p.m.-5 p.m. at the Ulupalakua Ranch Store [BOOK SIGNING] Maui Whispers, by local author Rick Olson, tells the tale of “renowned sea-life painter” Sky Shafer and his Norwegian girlfriend Karina Johnsen. They live the good life on Maui, but then Sky finds out that it all might be a sham! Nasty rumors begin flying around, then Sky’s vicious ex-girlfriend Rosie Faber comes back! It’s vibrant! It’s colorful! It’s intimate, yet revealing. Awwww yeaaaaahhhhh. Anyway, Olson’s going to be at the Ranch Store signing copies. So go see him. He’s probably a really nice guy. [ANTHONY PIGNATARO]
DAY
➤➤➤➤➤MONDAY ➤➤➤➤➤TUESDAY ➤➤➤➤➤WEDNESDAY
IN
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O LDE M AKAWAO T OWN
Wild Wahine Wednesday with dj blast
C ASANOVA ’ S F AMOUS L ADIES N IGHT ! T E T E C T A HE
VENING
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“B EST L ATE N IGHT I N M AUI ”
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MUSIC STARTS @ 9:45PM • $5 COVER
TH PRIL 29 ? Friday, A AN YOU GO??
TH RIL 30 P A , y a d r u n Ever SAT y is Hotter tha rt a P a D t… h Reggae Nig
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$300 CASH
• $10 COVER S @ 9:45PMSE RS MUSIC START RI H IT $5.00 W
MUSIC STA
Make it a Memorable Evening • Dine and Dance at Casanova For dinner reservations call 572–0220 • Log on at casanovamaui.com LETTERS
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APRIL 28, 2005
21
FILMCRITIQUE
BY COLE SMITHEY
Happy Ending Don’t panic when the end of the world hits Douglas Adams’ popular novel comes to filmic life as Earthling Arthur Dent (Martin Freeman) hitches a ride into outer space with his furtively alien pal Ford Perfect (Mos Def—The Italian Job) when Earth is detonated to make way for a hyperspace bypass. Wacky aliens prevail as Arthur and Ford hitch their way onto a stolen spacecraft with a bipolar (two-headed) President of the Galaxy, Zaphod Beeblebrox (hilariously played by Sam Rockwell—Matchstick Men) and Beeblebrox’s cherished postmodern American assistant Trillian (Zooey Deschanel).
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
★★★★★ Rated PG-13/110 mins.
Adams’ infectious British humor translates well in debut director Garth Jennings’ faithful manipulation of the wholesome themes at hand. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy is an enjoyable sci-fi romp with a strong twist of self-effacing British raillery that children of all ages will get a charge from. Adams was a comedy writer who originally wrote The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy as part of a radio show, five-book trilogy and BBC television show. The original series was set in an underwater world that’s hinted at in the opening sequence of the movie wherein dolphins (advanced alien creatures) sing a goodbye ode to the Earth with the refrain, “So long and thanks for all the fish.” When the dolphins make their skyward exit you can’t help but break into a chuckle. Right away you’re snapped into Adams’ irreverent gentle black humor that shimmers with an anti-humanist environmentalist theme conveyed by dolphins doing gymnastic flips in the open night air under a moonlit sky. The kicker comes when the dopey Arthur Dent is introduced as a male counterpart to Bridget Jones. The fact that Arthur remains throughout the movie as an anti-hero space traveler wearing pajama bottoms, terrycloth robe and slippers merely adds to the joy of enduring post apocalypse reality with a meandering Brit who can barely brush his teeth in the morning. Nevertheless, our awkward protagonist Arthur did a very important thing when he saved the life of his loyal friend when the newly arrived Ford Perfect attempted to shake hands with a moving car that he postulated to be the governing life form on Earth. Arthur shoved Ford from the path of the oncoming vehicle and unwittingly insured his own survival when the Earth
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becomes vaporized to make way for a hyperspace bypass by exquisitely ugly Vogon aliens. The Earth’s destruction coincides with a roadway bypass that signals the demolition of Arthur’s picturesque rural cottage. Things could be worse for Arthur. Adams’ absurdist humor takes on a surreal tone when Ford rushes Arthur to a local pub to down six pints of beer in their last 12 minutes on Earth. The bar patrons soon put paper bags on their heads and lie down together in an implicit suicide pact while the camera cuts to people in big cities running through the streets like cattle. The end of the planet is an oddly peaceful affair that promises the audience a more meaningful and personal story of one lucky man and the equally fortunate girl (Trillian) that he adores. Voice over narration by Stephen Fry clues us into the contents of the Hitchhiker’s Guide that Ford contributed to as a writer. The words “Don’t Panic” are imprinted across the back of the most popular book in the universe, and serve to support the dry humor that’s most thoroughly expressed by Marvin the Paranoid Android (voiced by Alan Rickman). Marvin’s lazy pessimism augurs the goofy adventure with knowing asides as he moans about the uselessness of every endeavor. The thematic centerpiece of Hitchhiker’s Guide comes when a giant computer answers the eternal question, “What is the meaning of life?” The computer’s surprising answer is appropriately short and inscrutable after keeping people waiting for millions of years for the solution. But the computer trumps its offhand answer by raising another question about what would be a more appropriate question in the first place. Here, Adams’ prescient wit subtly demands something of the viewer that extends the macrocosmic vantage point of the story. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy unspools like an effortless compilation of humor from Monty Python, Men In Black, Mars Attacks and Brazil. It’s a skeptical satire that fits slapstick physical humor with a biting sense of the importance of creative thought. In short, it’s very British, in the best sense of the word. MTW
Is that a Juicer Hat?
SHOWTIMES
MOVIECAPSULES MAUI FILM FESTIVAL’S CANDLELIGHT CINEMA Friday, April 29 Upside Of Anger 5 & 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater Starring Kevin Costner and Joan Allen. When her husband unexpectedly disappears, a sharp-witted suburban wife and her daughters juggle their romantic dilemmas and family dynamics. "Sometimes what tears us apart helps us put it back together." Rated R. 118 min.
Sunday, May 1 Monumental... 3, 5 & 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Monumental: David Brower's Fight For Wild America. This stirring portrait of America's greatest environmentalist, who was the first executive director of the Sierra Club, founder of Friends of the Earth and Earth Island Institute, and protecter and creator of some of our most treasured National Parks, is focused on the spiritual connection between humans and the great outdoors, and the moral obligation to preserve what is left of the world's natural wonders. A Special Lei Day and belated Earth Day celebration presented by the Maui Film Festival to benefit the Maui Chapter of the Sierra Club. Unrated. 97 min.
Wednesday, May 4 Bride & Prejudice 5 & 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio A Hollywood meets Bollywood love story that unfolds in a riot of color, emotion, song and dance. From the filmmakers behind Bend It Like Beckham. Rated PG-13. 110 min.
New This Week HITCHHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY (PG) - Action/Adventure, Comedy, Science-Fiction Earthman Arthur Dent is having such a bad day— not only is his house about to be bulldozed, but he discovers that he has an alien for a best friend. Actually, that would be rad! Meanwhile, Planet Earth is about to be demolished to make way for a hyperspace bypass (so very Jetsons!). The universe begins when the world ends, nothing is what it seems—even a simple towel is the most useful thing in the universe. Who knew? See Film Critique. XXX: STATE OF THE UNION - (PG13) Action/Adventure - NSA Agent August Gibbons (Samuel L Jackson) is fresh off the success of his last renegade recruitment, and once again finds himself in need of an outsider. Gibbons and his new agent Darius Stone (Ice Cube), now code-named "XXX," (uh, does that mean he’s a badass?) together must track down a military splinter group that is conspiring to overthrow the U.S. government.
Now Showing A LOT LIKE LOVE - (PG13) - Romantic Comedy - Supposedly, this flick is about destiny, connection and the frequently fuzzy line between chance friendships and “happily ever after.” It traces the relationship of Oliver (Ashton Kutcher) and Emily (Amanda Peet) who met on a flight from Los Angeles to New York, each of them declaring that they couldn't be more wrong for each other. Uh, hello? Hasn’t everyone seen When Harry Met Sally already?! Yeah, we all know how this one ends. AMITYVILLE HORROR - (R) - Horror - So here we are again, at this house of horror. Back in 1994, Ronald Defeo confessed to methodically shooting his parents and four siblings while they slept, claiming "voices" in the house drove him to commit the heinous murders. A year later, the Lutz family moves into the house thinking it would be their dream house. But shortly after settling in, bizarre and unexplainable events, nightmarish visions and evil—worse than just a leaky roof—resides... Damn, who is their real estate agent?! THE BEAUTY SHOP – (PG-13) – Comedy – Here we are back in the chair again. Gina (Queen Latifia) has finally had it with her egotistical boss (Kevin Bacon). She ups and leaves, not only to open up a shop of her own but also taking a few of the key clients and shampoo girl (Andie MacDowell, Mena Suvaris and Alicia Silvertsone). Fixing up this rundown salon, Gina inherits a very colorful and sexy sassy new group of people, or just what is needed in a beauty shop—a bunch of chatty Kathy’s. FEVER PITCH – (PG13) – Romantic Comedy So Ms. Barrymore is at it again. At first, he
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seemed like just a simple guy (Jimmy Fallon) she meets and falls in love with. However, you know there’s always a problem. This time it’s baseball. Even though their lives are very different, the relationship seems perfect until... yes that’s right—the baseball season begins and she has to compete with his first true love: the Boston Red Sox. Hang in there, Drew. CONSTANTINE – (R) – Action-Adventure, Suspense, Horror and Thriller – As our astute intern puts it, this film looks like a cross between The Matrix and Devil’s Advocate. We love that good vs. evil, Heaven and Hell stuff! Plus, it’s got beautiful Kauai-boy Keanu Reeves playing the tortured investigator of supernatural mysteries and hottie Rachel Weisz as... well, who cares. HITCH – (PG13) – Romantic Comedy – Will Smith plays a matchmaker who uses less than honest methods in his work—whahhhhh???!?!—and then gets busted by a totally hot undercover reporter played by Eva Mendes. Oh, and there’s a chick in the movie named after a popular antihistamine. ICE PRINCESS – (G) – Romantic Comedy - Don’t think this is another Ice Castles, people. It’s just another one of them formulaic, cute teen chick underdog battles against “the popular girls” to rise up the ranks and win... something. A trophy? The presidency? Oh yeah, selfesteem. Whoopee. We all know self-esteem gets you nowhere. Just look at Robert Blake! Stars Michelle Trachtenberg, Joan Cusack and Kim Cattrall. THE INTERPRETER - (PG13) - Drama, Thriller African-born U.N. interpreter Silvia Broome, (Nicole Kidman) inadvertently overhears a death threat against an African head of state scheduled to address the United Nation's General Assembly. Of course, she realizes that she has become a target and that no ones believes her, especially Tobin Keller (Sean Penn), the federal agent charged with protecting her. KING’S RANSOM - (PG13) - Comedy - Malcom King (Anderson) is a wealthy and arrogant businessman. And his ex-wife has plans to take him for all he’s worth. So well, duh, he’s determined to avoid losing his fortune to her and he gets this bright idea to plan his own kidnapping with the help of his mistress, and her ex-con brother. But soon enough, he’s not the only one who has kidnapping on his mind. KUNG FU HUSTLE - (R) - Action/Adventure, Foreign, Comedy - Shanghai in the 1930s is a very dangerous
time when gangs ruled the streets. The most notorious of these, the Axes, strike fear into the hearts of honest citizens and inspire admiration in one young wannabe, who wreaks havoc when he recklessly poses as an Axe member and causes a riot between the real gang members and the denizens of a housing project. MERCHANT OF VENICE - (R)- In 16th century Venice, when a merchant must default on a large loan from an abused Jewish moneylender for a friend with romantic ambitions, the bitterly vengeful creditor demands a gruesome payment instead. Bill collectors at it again. The film deftly explores the themes of love vs loyalty, law vs justice, and passion vs reason. MILLION DOLLAR BABY – (PG 13) – Romantic Drama – This Oscar-nominated film is getting rave reviews, but it’s really just another cliché-filled picture about a young boxer who’s had a tough life but, through sheer force of will, fights the good fight. Stars Hillary Swank, Morgan Freeman and Clint Eastwood, who also directed it. ROBOTS – (PG) – Animation, Sci-Fi, Comedy – This computer-generated cartoon details a world populated by robots. Yes, I know it sounds fantastic and even a bit childish, but really, this place actually exists! And I’ve been there! No, I swear—what? No, I haven’t taken my meds, yet. Anyway, it features the voices of Mel Brooks, Ewan McGregor, Halle Berry, Greg Kinnear and, of course, Robin Williams. SAHARA - (PG13) - Action/Adventure - Explorer Dirk Pitt (Matthew McConaughey) takes on a treasure hunt in several regions of North Africa in search of a ship called The Ship of Death—why, Dirk, why?! Anyway, along with his smarty pants sidekick (Steve Zahn), they use their clever heroics to help out the beautiful Doctor Eva (Penelope Cruz), who believes this ship is the reason why there are a lot of mysterious deaths. She’s smart, that one. See Film Critique. SIN CITY – (R) – Action-Adventure and Crime/Gangster – Another tale of a violent city where the police department is more corrupt than the bad seeds. This futuristic tale follows three stories, including one involving Marv (Mickey Rourke), a bad ass who is a Terminator-like, nearly impossible-to-kill street fighter. He goes on a rampage of vengeance when his one-night-stand gets murdered— correction, his one true love. Aw, what a guy to care the morning after! Also starring Bruce Willis, Benicio Del Toro, Michael Madsen and Jessica Alba.
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MAUI FILM FESTIVAL Castle Theater, 572-3456 Upside of Anger - R - Fri , 5, 7:30 Monumental - Unrated - Sun 3, 5, 7:30 Bride and Prejudice - PG13 - Wed 5, 7:30
MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, 249–2222 (Showtimes) = Matinee Beauty Shop - PG13 - Th (12:50, 1:20, 3:45, 4:15), 6:45, 7:15, 9:15, 9:50, Fr, M-W (12:55, 1:20, 3:45, 4:15), 6:45, 7:10, 9:25, 9:45, Sa-Su (12:55, 1:20), 3:45, 4:15, 6:45, 7:10, 9:25, 9:45 Constantine - R - Th only (4), 9:25 Hitch - PG13 - Th (12:45, 1:10, 3:30, 4:10), 6:50, 7:10, 9:30, 9:45, Sa-Su (1:10), 4:10, 6:50, 7:25, 9:30, 9:45 Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - PG - Fr, M-W (12:45, 1, 3:20, 4), 6:40, 7, 9:15, 9:30, Sa-Su (12:45, 1, 3:20), 4, 6:40, 7, 9:15, 9:30 Ice Princess - G - Th (12:30, 2:50, 5:05), 7:20, 9:40, Fr, M-W (12:30, 2:40, 4:50), Sa-Su (12:30, 2:40), 4:50 King’s Ransom - PG13 - Th (12:30, 2:55, 5:10), 7:40, 10, Fr, M-W (12:35, 2:55, 5:10), 7:30, 9:55, Sa-Su (12:35, 2:55), 5:10, 7:30, 9:55 Merchant of Venice - R - Th only (12:35, 3:30), 6:35, 9:35 Million Dollar Baby - PG - Th only (1), 6:40 Robots - PG - Th (12:30, 12:45, 2:45, 3, 5, 5:15), 7:20, 7:30, 9:30, 9:45, Fr, M-W (12:30, 12:45, 2:45, 3, 5, 5:15), 7:20, 9:35, Sa-Su (12:30, 12:45, 2:45, 3), 5, 5:15, 7:20, 9:35 Sin City - R - Th (12:40, 1, 3:20, 4), 6:30, 7, 9:20, 10, Fr-W (12:40, 3:15), 6:30, 7:05, 9:20, 9:50 XXX: State of the Union - PG13 - Fr, M-W (12:30, 1:15, 2:50, 4:20, 5:15), 7:15, 7:40, 9:40, 10, Sa-Su (12:30, 1:15, 2:50), 4:20, 5:15, 7:15, 7:40, 9:40, 10
KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 875-4910 A Lot Like Love - PG13 - Fr-W (1), 4:30, 7:25, 9:45 Amityville Horror - R - Daily (12:45, 3), 5:05, 7:10, 9:30 Fever Pitch - PG13 - Daily (12:30, 2:55), 5:20, 7:45, 10:05 Kung Fu Hustle - R - Fr-W (12:30, 2:45), 5, 7:15, 9:35 Interpreter - PG13 - Fr-W (1:10), 4:15, 7, 9:50 Sahara - PG13 - Dailly (1:15), 4:40, 7:20, 10
KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 Amityville Horror - R - Th only (1:45), 5, 8 Hitchhiker’s Guide - PG - Fr-Sa (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, 9:30, Su-W (1:15), 4:15, 7 Interpreter - PG13 - Th, Su-W (1), 4:15, 7, Fr-Sa (1), 4:15, 7, 9:40 Kung Fu Hustle - R - Th (1:30), 4:45, 7:45, Fr-Sa (1:30), 4:45, 7:35, 9:45, Su-W (1:30), 4:45, 7:45 Sahara - PG13 - Th only (1:15), 4:30, 7:15 XXX: State of the Union - PG13 - Fr-Sa (1:45), 5, 7:45, 9:55, Su-W (1:45), 5, 8
FRONT STREET THEATERS 900 Front Street, 249–2222 Amityville Horror - R - Th-Fr, M-W (4:45), 7:40, 9:50, Sa-Su (1:45), 4:45, 7:40, 9:50 Fever Pitch - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (4), 7:30, 9:45, SaSu (1:15), 4, 7:30, 9:45 Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - PG - Fr, M-W (4:15), 7:10, 9:25, Sa Su (1), 4:15, 7:10, 9:25 Kung Fu Hustle - R - Th-Fr, M-W (4:30), 7:30, 9:30, Sa-Su (1:30), 4:30, 7:30, 9:30 Sahara - PG13 - Fr, M-W (4), 7, 9:45, Sa-Su (1:15), 4, 7, 9:45 Sin City - R - Th-Fr, M-W (4:15), 7, 9:15, Sa-Su (1), 4:15, 7, 9:15
WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249–2222 A Lot Like Love - PG13 - Th (1:30, 4:30), 7:15, 9:45, Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:30), 7:30, 9:50, Sa-Su (10:45, 1:30), 4:30, 7:30, 9:50 Interpreter - PG13 - Th (1, 4), 7, 9:50, Fr, M-W (1:15, 4:15), 9:15, 9:55, Sa-Su (10:15, 1:15), 4:15, 7:15, 9:55 Sahara - PG13 - Th only (1:15, 4:15), 7:30, 10 XXX: State of the Union - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1, 4), 7, 9:30, Sa-Su (10:30, 1), 4, 7, 9:30
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Maui’s Largest Selection of Musical Instruments & Sound Systems for 26 years
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Maui Time has immediate openings for internships. If you are a high school or college student, or recent grad this may be the opportunity for you! Potential positions in editorial, graphic design, accounting, or sales could give you the experience or college credits that you need. Previous experience is not necessary. Budding interns should want to work in a dynamic newspaper office with a great crew. Please send a resume to 658 Front St. # 7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or call 808-661-3786 x3# and speak to Jennifer.
ARTS&ENTERTAINMENT
BY SHAUNNA KEOUGH
‘Everybody Is Somebody’ No one knows high school drama better than Miss Sue Ann Loudon When I arrived to meet Miss Loudon in her classroom, she was relaxed and reflective, perched on her reclining chair in front of a wooden stage. She sat amidst racks of character clothing, stage props and old photographs. A former student of Miss Loudon’s stopped by to say hello, as have so many of her students over the years. “We’ll never uncover the veil of secrecy that is Miss Loudon,” the student said to me with a snicker. He was kneeling beside her, trying to recall 40 years of successful performances at Baldwin High under her creative direction. “What about Grease?” he asked. “Oh, that must have been the late ‘80s,” she replied. “Or was it the ‘90s? Oh, I can’t remember!” Actually it was last year. But with a solid five shows a year over the past 40 years, you really can’t blame her. Loudon did
remember the first show she put on in 1965, Bye Bye Birdie. “That is my fondest memory,” she said, “because it was the first really cool thing that we got to do. It helped me fall in love with theater. There’s nothing like the first. The kids were so excited and so appreciative.” Loudon first visited Maui on a summer trip back in the 1960s and, like most who visit the island, fell in love with it and vowed to return. After graduating from Central Missouri State Teachers College, Loudon found a job teaching at Baldwin High School. Talk to any one of her students and you’ll quickly learn that Miss Loudon is an extremely dedicated and demanding teacher, a reputation she acknowledges demurely. “I used to be intimidating to the kids, but as the years go by, you change,” she said. “I still yell. But I always tell them, ‘I am not mad, I am not angry. I am just yelling because I yell.’” It’s difficult to imagine anything but
If she were a painting, Miss Loudon would look a lot like this
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Sue Ann Loudon: Celebrating 40 Years of Inspiration Saturday, 7:30 p.m. at the Castle Theater, MACC. Tickets: $10 adults, $8 seniors & $6 students. Tickets for pre-show Gala Dinner: $25 (does not include show). Call 242-7469. warmth from the humble teacher. Miss Loudon has soft blue eyes and a pleasant smile. She speaks with great joy about her students. “It’s been lovely here at Baldwin because the kids have been so wonderful!” she said. Loudon’s dedication to the students is one of her defining aspects. She started “Diamond Lil,” an annual performance of singing, dancing and acting that Loudon oversees, put on for the sole purpose of fundraising for the senior class. Every year, at the end of “Diamond Lil,” it is well known that when the time comes for Miss Loudon to go onstage to receive praise for her work, she is nowhere to be found. It made sense then, that when discussing the celebration next weekend in her honor, Loudon shyly covered her face with her hands. “It’s an overwhelming thought that somebody would want to do this for me,” she said. “Baldwin has fabulous, successful teachers and I think I’m just one of many talented individuals here.” Loudon’s simple advice she gives to her students when they leave her classroom is, “If you love it, then do it.” To her, theater is a life skill that teaches you discipline and work ethic, attributes that carry over into life after high school. “Having compassion in life is one of the most important things,” she said. “Always remember that everybody is somebody.” In an attempt to uncover the “veil of secrecy” that her former student spoke of, I asked Miss Loudon what it is about her that harbors such a celebration in her honor. She leaned back and shyly replied, “I’m just a theater teacher who goes to work, then goes home.” MTW
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John Ford Coley w/J. Michaels Band - Thursday (tonight!). Grammy-nominated John Ford Coley was half of a 1970s/1980s duo with England Dan, best known for the hits "I'd Really Love to See You Tonight," "We'll Never Have to Say Goodbye Again," "Nights Are Forever Without You," "Sad to Belong" and "Part of Me, Part of You," among many others. Coley will perform these songs as well as new material. Tickets: $35, $30, $25. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Sue Ann Loudon - Saturday. Celebrating 40 years of inspiration, former students from all over the world will gather to honor Sue Ann Loudon on her 40th anniversary of teaching dramatic arts at Baldwin High School. An evening of good food, memories and belly laughs, as students from all four decades come together to say “thank you” to the teacher who touched their lives. Tickets: $10 adults, $8 seniors & $6 students. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Lei Of Stars - Sunday. May Day Celebration with legendary Hawaiian singer Emma Veary and her talented daughter Robin; the Maui Concert Youth and Boys Choruses; Kamehameha Maui Orchestra and Ulalena’s Anthony Natividad, all performing under the direction of Celia Canty of the Maui Choral Arts Association, with San Francisco Giants' Hall of Fame broadcaster Lon Simmons as narrator. Tickets: $35, $25, $10. 4 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW.
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APRIL 28, 2005
DJ Shark In The Water No cover, 9pm
MON - Mark Epstein & Friends, Blues & Jazz, No cover, 10pm; TUE - Jay Molina & Gilbert Emata, $5, 10pm; WED - Hone Uncle Rio, No cover, 10pm WED - Wahine Wednesday w/DJ Blast, $5, 9:45pm
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MON - Kanoa, No cover, 9:30pm; TUE - The Truth, Local Country, 8:30pm; WED - Sunn Lounge w/DJ Sal, $5, 9:30pm
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Brothers Cazimero - Monday. In the 1970s, the brothers have increased awareness of Hawaii around the world, and their talent, incredible showmanship and infectious humor have helped spread aloha. Beautiful harmonies, acoustic arrangements and hula are always a part of the Brothers Cazimero stage, honoring the past, present and future of Hawaii arts. Tickets: $35, $25, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW.
TICKETS ON SALE
The Legend Of Kaulula'Au - May 6. A Hawaiian play by Keali‘iwahine Hokoana, adapted from a story by W.N. Pualewa, starring Moses Goods. This oneman, nine-character show tells the little-known legend of Kaulula'au, once one of Maui’s most notable chiefs, but now almost forgotten. Born to a woman resurrected from the dead, he was banished to the ghost-inhabited island of Lana‘i, came to reign supreme on Lana‘i and then became a chief on Maui. Tickets: $18. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Jonny Lang - May 6. Blues/Rock phenomenon Lang opened for the Rolling Stones the first time he performed in Hawai’i. This explosive young guitar slinger has played to sold-out audiences and has been featured on MTV and performed at the White House for the President with B.B. King. Tickets: $45, $40, $35. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. The Wailers - May 7. Along with the late Bob Marley, The Wailers were widely recognized as one of the most important musical acts of the 20th century. This current formation of the band is comprised of original recording/touring members. Tickets: $25 advance, $30 day of show. 5 p.m., A & B Amphitheater, MACC, 242-
7469. Te Vaka - May 13. Te Vaka delivers more than just a performance—they take the audience into the heart of Polynesia, accompanied by rhythm, color and melody. Traditional log drum rhythms from their Tokelauan, Maori and Samoan ancestors are fired with world beat/funk grooves on guitar and keyboard to hone the music and dance with a modern edge. Te Vaka the canoe speaks to a world culture: “Adrenaline-powered percussion bringing ancient traditions into the modern world. Tickets: $28, $18, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Mapa Spring Dance Extravaganza - May 14-15. Saturday: Jazz, Tap & Hip-Hop Revue Sunday: Sleeping Beauty Ballet. Celebrate dance with two spectacular shows for the entire family. The classical tale of Sleeping Beauty gracefully put to dance and a high energy dance revue from toe tapping to heel stomping dance styles at its best. Tickets: $20 adult, $15 kids. 2 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Maui Classical Music Festival - May 15-16. Music directors Yizhak Schotten and Katherine Collier are featuring two great evening programs and internationally known musicians: Yehonatan Berick, violin/viola; Ilya Kaler, violin; Irina Muresanu, violin; Yizhak Schotten, viola; Norman Fischer, cello; Amit Peled, cello; Elizabeth Francoeur, clarinet; Katherine Collier, piano; Jeanne Kierman Fischer, piano. Tickets: $33, $23, $10. Sunday, 4 p.m., From Russia With Love; Monday, 7:30 p.m., Festival Finale: A Night of Romance; McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Ram Dass and Dr. Wayne Dyer - May 19. Two renowned spiritual leaders and “guiding lights” radiate from Maui to the world. This benefit evening honors Ram Dass (Be Here Now) help purchase a home for the wheelchair-bound leader, and set-up a financial foundation to allow him to live and continue to work. Tickets: $100, $50, $25. 6:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Midnite - May 20-21. Hailing from the Island of St Croix, Midnite is one of the most promising roots reggae bands of the millennium. They are vanguards of Conscious Reggae, whose profound and innovative lyrics are sincere and deeply rooted. Tickets: $20 adv, $25 door. Friday (21+ show), 9:30 p.m.; Saturday (All Ages), 6 p.m., Hapa’s Nightclub, Kihei, 879-9001. Sister Cities Festival Concert - June 11. An evening to "Celebrate Peace in the World," featuring Uluwehi Guerrero and Halau Hula Kauluokala; the cast of 'Ulalena, and representative performers from Maui’s sister cities. Tickets: $25, $15, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Ki Ho‘Alu: Slack Key Guitar Festival - June 26. An all-day, all-star line-up of Hawai`i’s finest slack-key musicians. The music of Hawaiian slack key guitar has evolved into a popular musical tradition that truly captures the magic of Hawai´i. Event festivities include local vendors with fresh flower lei, fine Hawaiian arts & crafts and delicious local-style food. Free. 2 p.m., A&B Amphitheater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Maui Festival Orchestra Concert - June 30. Featuring a broad range of multicultural music including classical, Okinawan, Chinese and Hawaiian. Artists
include Na Hoku Hanohano Award-winning Uluwehi Guerrero; internationally-known cellist Lifen Anthony and her 12-year old daughter Rianna. Maui’s popular taiko group Zenshin Daiko; the Maui Cello Ensemble and the Jinpu Kai USA Kin Lyosho Ryukyu Geino Ken Kyusho Okinawan Dancers. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.
EVENTs
St. Joseph Festival - Fri-Sun, 6-11 p.m., St. Joseph Church & School. The Fest offers great food, live music, valuable goods auction, livestock auction, country store, games and attractions for the children. For info, call 572-7652.
SATURDAY, APRIL 30
2005 Healthy Hawaii Expo - 10 a.m.-5 p.m. at Kahului. A day of health exploration and awakening. Over 50 exhibits will feature aromatherapy, chiropractic, massage, acupuncture, energy healing, crystals, nutritional products and all types of alternative healing practices. Wow, is there really 50 exhibits?? For info, call 669-9091. Ulupalakua Thing - 11 a.m.-4 p.m. at Tedeschi Vineyard & Ulupalakua Ranch. It’s finally here! Showcasing Hawaii’s agricultural products and madein-Hawaii items with proceeds supporting Hawaii’s agriculture industry. Featuring the popular Chefs’ Challenge, the Malama Aina Plant Competition, leimaking and flower arrangement contests, delicious food, arts and crafts, music by many local stars including Eric Gilliom and Grammy-nominated artist Willie K. Admission: $20 at the door, $15 in advance. For info, call 888-808-1036. HBDA Central Maui Inaugural Ball - 6-9:30 p.m., at the Velma McWayne Santos Community Center. The Central Maui Chapter of Hawaii Ballroom Dance Association presents 2005 Inaugural Ball. Buffet dinner will be catered by Rosie's. For info, call 244-3263. Riding Giants - 5:30 p.m. at the UH-Maui Community College. Live music and aloha from Grammy winner John Keawe from the Big Island along with Uncle Boy Kanae. Three films and award-winning food booths. $20 per car. Maui-based novelist Rick Olson - 3-5p.m. at the Ranch Store (on the porch with the Paniolos), Ulupalakua. Olson will be signing his new novel, Maui Whispers. The novel explores the culture, characters, and island spirit of Maui through a romantic adventure. Hmm, sounds interesting! For info, call 669-6548.
TUESDAY, MAY 03
Divine Music From Brazil with Caroca - 6:309:30 p.m., Makawao Union Church Sanctuary. Brazilian music trio: Edgard Silva on Tabla and Ricardo on Violin. Music to ignite the body and touch the soul. Tickets: $15. For info, call 573-6443.
ART
Palm Trees In Watercolor - Mon, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. at the Art School, Kapalua. Learn to handle your brush with ease and sureness by painting coconut trees! Can that really happen? Anyway, Frances Ku shows how practicing brush coordination and stroke move-
thursday 04/28
HAPA’S NIGHTCLUB
friday04/29
No information available
41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-9001
saturday04/30 sunday05/01
monday05/02 – wednesday05/04
MON - Willie K, Live 104.7FM TUE - Ultra Fab Tuesdays w/Fat Joe, 9pm;
No information available
MON - Reggae At The Rock w/Marty Dread, $5, 10pm; FRI - DJ Boomshot, No cover, 10:30pm
HARD ROCK CAFÉ
900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400
Crunch Pups 9pm
DJs El Gato & Ray Masters $5, 10pm
Live Local Artists No cover, 10pm
Kenny Roberts 6pm
Kenny Roberts 6pm
El Nino 6pm
Live Local Entertainment $6, 9pm
Habanero Brothers $5, 9:30pm
Live Local Entertainment, No cover, 9pm
Middle John 9pm
41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849
JACQUE’S
120 Hana Highway, Paia - 579-8844
KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB 36 Keala Place, Kihei - 875-7711
KAHULUI ALE HOUSE
355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001
Gina Martinelli 6-9pm
Tom Cherry Band 9pm
HENRY’S BAR & GRILL
MON - Dr.Nat, Jazz/Salsa, No cover, 7:30-10pm MON - Steve Mendoza, 6pm; TUE-WED - Da Hawaiians, 6pm
Habanero Brothers No cover, 10pm Karoke w/James No cover, 10pm
MON - Martini Monday; TUE - Local Grooves w/Vaughn; WED - DJ Boomshot, No cover, 10pm
DA KINECALENDAR ment, without the use of a pencil or eraser. For info, call 665-0007.
LECTURES
The ABCs of a Business Plan - Wed, 12-1 p.m., Maui County Business Resource Center, Maui Mall. Susie Thieman of Maui Economic Opportunity will discuss the reasons for writing a business plan. Participants will receive an outline of the business plan taught by MEO’s Core Four Business Plan. Free. For info, call 873-8247. L.A. Artist Sandow Birk - Thu, 7 p.m. at Hui No’eau Visual Art Center. Sandow will be talking about his past work as well as the new series of prints. Following the discussion there will be an informal viewing of “In Smog and Thunder: The Great War of
the Californians. For info, call 572 6560, ext. 31 Maui Biologist Dr. Art Medeiros - Thu, 7 p.m. at Tavares Community Center pool-side meeting room in Pukalani. Dr. Art Medeiros, a well-known Maui research biologist, will speak on biological control for invasive weeds, such as Miconia, clidemia, Christmas berry, and strawberry guava, that threaten native ecosystem of Hawai’i. Free. For info, call 572-9724.
POETRY
Divine Poetry, Vision and Meditation - Tue, 78:30 p.m. at Unity Church of Maui. Readings from Sri Aurobindo’s poems and essays: Works that Express the Power of Vision. Concepts will be complemented in digital artwork and experienced in meditation.
POLITICAL
1.2 mile course, which finishes at Dig Me Beach, Ka’anapali. For info, call 661-7255.
The Oil Factor: Behind the War on Terror - Fri, 7 p.m. at Maui Community College. The film features the human cost and the geo-strategic picture of the U.S. war-on-terror with solid facts, original footage shot on location, and interviews with imminent historians and policy makers. Free. For info, call 573-3255.
SPORTS
Maui Table Tennis - Thu-Sat, 6:30 p.m. at Kihei Youth Center. This is a cancer benefit for Ashley Tone. Beginners, and open divisions, first and second third place cash prizes. For info, call 205-2684. Lahaina Swim Club - Sun, 8:30 a.m. at Hanakaoo (Canoe) Beach Park. The 21st annual swim will be a
STAGE
Sue Ann Loudon - Sat, 7:30 p.m. at Castle Theater MACC. Celebrating 40 years of inspiration, former students from all over the world will gather to honor Sue Ann Loudon, dramatic arts instructor at Baldwin High School. An evening of good food, memories and belly laughs, as students from all four decades come together. Tickets: $10. For info, call 242-SHOW.
DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI
BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria – John Kane, Wed, Thu and Fri; Harry Troupe, Sat; Kaleo Phillips, Sun; Clay
★
★
Every Friday Night is Party Night ★ ★ ★ ★Come As You Are ★ or Dress Like A Star! ★★ ts ues EE G er FR iD nn itted Adm
★
S P R E
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★Longhi’s is Maui’s Best Open Air ★ Night Club with Fantastic Ocean Views!
FRIDAY, APRIL 29 FREE Valet Parking • Dinner served until 10:00 p.m. 9:45 music begins $5 Cover • Dinner Guests Free Admission
Dancing on Longhi’s fabulous koa wood dance floor longhis@maui.net 888 Front St. Lahaina 667-2288 www.longhis.com LETTERS
NEWS
COVER STORY
SURF
DINING
DAY&NIGHT
A&E
FILM
DA KINE CALENDAR
THE GRID
CLASSIFIEDS
MAUI TIME WEEKLY
APRIL 28, 2005
27
thursday04/28 KIMO’S
845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811
KOBE JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555
friday04/29
saturday04/30 sunday05/01
TBA
Kilohana 10pm
Karaoke 9:30pm
Karaoke 9:30pm
monday05/02– wednesday05/04
LIFE’S A BEACH
TBA 9pm
Rubber Sole, 9pm
Gomega, $5, 9pm
Karaoke 9pm
MON - Open Jam w/Adam, 9pm; TUE - Crunch Pups, No cover, 9pm; WED - Fragil X, 9pm
LOBBY LOUNGE
Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30pm
Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30pm
Nils & Anastasia 8:30-11:30pm
Ricardo Dioso 8:30-11:30pm
MON - Nils & Anastasia, 8:30-11:30pm; WED - Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, No cover, 8:30-11:30pm
Live Music 9pm
Live Music 9pm
WED - Karaoke, 9pm
1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010
Four Seasons Resort, Wailea - 874-8000
Gomega 9pm
LONGHI’S
888 Front Street, Lahaina - 667-2288
LULU’S
1945 S. Kihei Rd, Kihei - 879-9944
Live Music 9pm
Live Music 9pm
DON’T MISS THE BOAT! You’ve heard of Sobe? And Capri Sun?
Earn 5 figures a month with the world’s largest health beverage company! Overall company sales over 20 MILLION All training provided A MONTH! Call 808.250.1788
DA KINECALENDAR Mortenson Mon, Tue. All sets from 7:30-10 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700. Cafe O’Lei - Steve Sargenti, Tue-Fri 5:30-9 p.m. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661-9491. Cheeseburger In Paradise – Brooks Maguire, Thu, Sat, Sun and Wed; Harry Troupe, Fri; Gail Swanson, Mon and Tue. All sets from 4:30-7:30 p.m. and 8-11 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855. Cool Cat Cafe - Erik Pietsch Mon & Thu; Howard Ahia Fri-Sun, Hau Phat, Wed. All Sets 7:30 - 10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908. Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie - Nino Toscano, Thur, Fri; Kawika Lum Ho, Sat; Damien, Tue; E rnest Puaa, Sun-Wed; Brian Haia, Mon. All sets from 6-9 p.m. 4405 Honoapiilani Highway, 669-3474. Hula Grill - Kawika Lum , Albert & Billy, Mon; Jarret Roback and Albert & Billy, Tue; Ernest Pua’a and Brian & Roy, Wed; Ernest Pua’a and Bradah Brian & Don Thur; Bradah Brian & Roy, Fri; Ernest Pua’a Kawika Lum and, Sat; Kawika Lum Ryan Tanaka & Friends. Sun. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Building P, Kaanapali, 667-6636. Java Jazz/Soup Nutz – Acoustic Music with Mike Fri-Sat only 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., 6670787. Kahana Terrace Restaurant – Harry Troupe, Tue and Thu; Randy Reno, Sat. All sets from 6-9 p.m. Sands of Kahana Resort, 669-5399.
Seafood Restaurant & Sushi Bar Late Night Specials 10pm to 1am – 21 & over with I.D.
50% OFF SUSHI & APPETIZERS FREE KARAOKE - DRAFT BEER SPECIALS
KIHEI, THURSDAY - SATURDAY KAPALUA, THURSDAY & FRIDAY
EARLY BIRD SPECIAL 5:30pm to 6:00pm DAILY
Kapalua 669-6286 The Shops at Kapalua
Kihei 879-0004 Near Foodland
28
APRIL 28, 2005
DA KINE CALENDAR
Kimo’s – Sam Ahia, Wed thru Sun, 7-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811. Leilani’s On The Beach – Crazy Fingers, Thu, 4-6 p.m.; JD & Friends, Fri - Sat, 2:30 -5:30 p.m.; Kilohana, Sun, 3:30-6 p.m; 2435 Ka’anapali Parkway, Building J, Ka’anapali, 661-4495. Moose McGillycuddy’s - Greg & Steve, Thu; Llayne & Greg, Fri; Mark & Mike, Sat-Sun; Anastasia, Wed. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758. Pioneer Inn – Ah-Tim Eleniki (Local-style guitar), Thu; 6-9pm; Greg Di Piazza, Wed 6-9 pm.,Tue Captain Billy Bones 6- 8 p.m. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. Reilley’s Steaks & Seafood -, Gene Argelle, Mon and Tue; Irish Billy Bones Wed- Fri. 6- 8p.m. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Ste #304 Kahana, 667-7477 Sea House Restaurant – Hawaiian music with Albert Kaina and Kincades Basques, Thu; Kincade Basques, Fri, Sat, Mon,Tues; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed. All sets 7 p.m. - 9 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapiilani Road, Napili, 669-1500. Sir Wilfred’s At Whalers Village - Sun. Live Jazz 5 p.m. - 9 p.m. Main stage. The Best Jazz Musicians on the island, along with special guest stars. 2435 Ka’anapali Park Way, Lahaina 661-0202.
SOUTH MAUI
Bada Bing - Fri, Hilarious improv comedy with The Pono Players. Dinner & Show, $35. Seating 5:30-7 p.m. 8 p.m. $5.1945 S. Kihei Rd. in Kihei 875-0188. Blue Marlin Harbor-Front Grill & Bar - Fri, Mon Boy Kana’e and Ka’ Uhaneleo Sat Braddah Frances and friends 6:30 p.m. Sun Terri Garrison 4 - 6:30 p.m Maalaea Harbor, 244-8844. Capische? – Mark Johnston; Thu-Sat; Brian Cuomo Su, Wed; Sal & Estaire Godinez, Mon.; all sets 7-10
p.m. Diamond Resort, 555 Kaukahi, 879-2224. Maalaea Grill – Benoit Jazz Works, Thu, Fri and Sun, 6:30-9 p.m.; Jimmy C Jazz, Sat, 7-9 p.m. Maalaea Village Shops, 243-2206. Marco’s Southside Grill – Various artists (piano), Mon -Sun. All sets from 7-10 p.m. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., 874-4041. Mulligan’s on the Blue – Fri ,Tue, Wailea Nights, , dinner and show. 8- 10p.m.; Celtic Tigers, Sun, 7-10 p.m., Mon Gypsy Pacific 8-10 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131. Seawatch Restaurant - Nightly Music 6 -9 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., 875-8080. South Shore Tiki Lounge - Sunset happy hour $3 special's. Live entertainment Sun, Tue, Thu Tony & Peter. Wed & Fri Trevor Jones 4-6pm. Outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. 1913 Kihei Road, Kalama Village, 874-6444. Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café – Wed-Fri; guitar and vocals w/ Brado, Sat; Brian Wittman Sun-Mon; Patrick Mayor, Tue All sets from 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. Yorman’s By The Sea – All That Jazz Band, Wed,Sun 7 p.m.- 10 p.m. 760 S. Kihei Rd. Kihei 874-8385.
CENTRAL MAUI
Brigit & Bernard's Gardencafe - Live entertainment. 335 Hoohana St., Kahului Café Marc Aurel - Thursdays, Gene Argel and Shiro Mori, 7-10 p.m, 2nd Friday of every month, Shimmy Nights with Bellyroll Dance Company, 7-9 p.m. 28 N. Market Street, Wailuku near the Iao Theatre. 2440852. Mañana Garage – Nightly Neto & Friends, Latin music, 6:30 -9 p.m. 33 Lono Ave., Kahului, 873-0220. Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi. Live Music every Wed. 4 p.m. - 8 p.m. Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744.
UPCOUNTRY MAUI
Jacque’s - Mon, Live Jazz; 5 p.m.120 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-8844. Livewire Cafe - Various Artist Tue 7-10 p.m. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. Moana Cafe - Hula Honeys, vintage and contemporary Hawaiian music with elegance and aloha. Wed, Fri Live Jazz. Sun Anik 6-9 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.
RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI
Embassy Vacation Resort – Ka’anapali Beach 104 Ka’anapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill: Live music, Thu & Wed; Patrick Major, Fri; Wayne & Friends, Sat; Scott Baird & Gretchen, Sun; Ernest Pua’a w/ Hawaiian music, Mon & Tue. All sets from 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly. Swan Court. The Blue Note Swing Orchestra, Dancing nightly to Swing.Tue,Th, Sat, 2 p.m.- 4 p.m. Spats: Weeping Banyan Lounge with nightly Live Hawaiian Contemporary Music 6:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m.
thursday 04/28
friday04/29
MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S
DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm
DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm
DJ Swerve No cover, 9pm
DJ Rock Hard Tark No cover, 9pm
MON - Mark & Mike; TUE - DJs Mackie Mac & Big Zeek, $5, 9pm; WED - DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 9pm
MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE
Wailea Nights 8pm
Wailea Nights 8pm
Murray Thorne No cover, 9pm
Celtic Tigers No cover, 7pm
MON - Gypsy Pacific, No cover, 7pm; TUE - Acoustico, No cover, 7pm; WED - No entertainment
NEPTUNES
Smoke Wagon 9pm
TBA 9pm
TBA 9pm
Industry Night w/Till The Cops Come, 9pm
MON - Kahala Moon, 9pm; TUE - Smooth Tuesday w/Curtis Williams, 9pm; WED - J ROQ, 9pm
Live Jazz, No cover 9pm-12am
Live Jazz, No cover, 9pm-12am
Midnight Lounge $5, 9pm
Versitile, Hau Phat, Lahaina Grown, $8, 9pm
Willie K $5, 8:30pm
MON - Ladies’ Night w/DJ Boomshot, Ladies get in free, 9pm; TUE - DJ Styles, No cover; WED - LIve Blues w/Voodoo Suns, $5, 9:30pm
844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758
100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131
1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-2555
PACIFIC’O
505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341
Joe Cano $5, 9pm
PARADICE BLUZ
744 Front St., Lahaina - 667-5299
saturday04/30 sunday05/01
monday05/02– wednesday05/04
A cancer benefit for cancer patient Ashley Tone
Maui Table Tennis Tournament Beginners & Open Divisions
No Panties No Piercing Just Kick-Ass
Novice & Beginners Thursday, April 28th 6:30pm at Kihei Youth Center Open Division Saturday, April 30th 4pm at Lahaina Civic Center
Tattoos
Cash prize: $100 First place, $50 Second, $25 Third Entry fee: $20 single, $25 both events
Since 1998 10am-10pm Daily
For more information and an entry form, call Ben at 205-2684 or e-mail bentone@maui.net
193 Lahainaluna, Lahaina • 667-2156
SUNDAY
MONDAY LADIES’ NIGHT
April/May MAUI’S TRUE LIVE MUSIC VENUE MONDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY
1
2
3
WILLIE K
LADIES NIGHT $2 DRINKS
NO COVER
$3 CORONA $3 MARGARITA
LIVE BLUES
8
9
10
WILLIE K
LADIES NIGHT $2 DRINKS
NO COVER
$3 CORONA $3 MARGARITA
4
THURSDAY
FRIDAY
SATURDAY
28
29
30
TUESDAY
JOE CANO
MIDNIGHT LOUNGE DJ HEAT
MAY DAY CONCERT
WEDNESDAY
5
Cinco De Mayo Fiesta with JOE CANO
6
7
MIDNIGHT LOUNGE DJ HEAT
LIVE MUSIC
11
DRINK SPECIALS! 12
13
14
LIVE BLUES
JOE CANO
MIDNIGHT LOUNGE DJ HEAT
LIVE MUSIC
THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY SUNDAY
CHECK PARADICEBLUZ.COM FOR CALENDAR UPDATES
Cinco De Mayo
$2 Drinks NO COVER NIGHT $3 Coronas / Margaritas BLUES NIGHT Presented by Rockstar JOE CANO DJ HEAT ‘Midnight Lounge’ Hawaii’s Top Local Bands Long Island Iced Teas $5 UNCLE WILLIE K NIGHT All Star Jam Sessions / $3 Hinanos
Fiesta!
with Joe Cano Beer & Tequila Thursday, May 5th
744 FRONT STREET • A FEW STEPS BELOW FRONT STREET • 667-JAZZ (5299) • paradicebluz.com LETTERS
NEWS
COVER STORY
SURF
DINING
DAY&NIGHT
A&E
FILM
DA KINE CALENDAR
THE GRID
CLASSIFIEDS
MAUI TIME WEEKLY
APRIL 28, 2005
29
thursday04/28
friday04/29
SANDBAR & GRILL
89 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8742
DJs Durty & Apostle $3, 9pm
The Easy $5, 10pm
SANSEI 115 Bay Dr., Kapalua - 669-6286 SANSEI Kihei Town Center - 879-0004
Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am
Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am
Hyatt Regency, Ka’anapali - 667-4727
SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE
DJ. Sunny No cover, 9:30pm
SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR
Crunch Pups No cover, 9pm
2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602
Anesthesia & Zero Tolerance $5, 10pm
monday05/02– wednesday05/04
Open Mic Night w/Jarod 9pm
MON - North Shore Sextet, No cover, 9:30pm; TUE - Liquid Groove, No cover, 9pm; WED - Battle Of The Bands, 10pm
Acoustic w/Kanoa & Cody No cover, 9:30pm
MON - DJ ED V, No cover, 10pm; TUE - The Lollipop Landlords, No cover, 10pm
Hale & The Hot Lava Band No cover, 9pm
MON - Jukebox Nite, No cover; TUE - Erin Smith, No cover; WED - John Moore Project, 9pm
DJ Blast $10, 9:30pm
SPATS TRATTORIA
1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444
saturday04/30 sunday05/01
STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave. - 572-1380
TSUNAMI NIGHTCLUB
3850 Wailea Alanui Dr. - 875-1234
Open Jukebox 9pm
Kenny Roberts & Friends 9pm
Crunch Pups $3, 9pm
The Truth $3, 9pm
DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am
DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am
DA KINECALENDAR Ka’anapali Beach Hotel 2525 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0011
Four Seasons Resort Wailea 3900 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-8000
Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages Illusions and dinner show Tue-Sat, 4:30 p.m., Kanahele Room; Lanui, live music and dancing, 6-9 nightly. Free hula show, 6:30-7:30 nightly; Sunday Champagne Brunch with Hawaiian music by Polinahe, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.
Lobby Lounge, Hawaiian music w/Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran, Thu, 5:30-7:30 p.m. followed by jazz w/Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; contemporary music w/Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis, Fri, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; island style trio, Sat and Mon, 5:307:30 p.m. w/hula dancer 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria, Sun, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Nils & Anastasia (of VooDoo Suns) live & unplugged Mon and Sat, 8:3011:30 p.m.; Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata, Wed, 8:30-11:30 p.m. Sunset torchlighting nightly.
Whalers Village Center Stage. Sat; Polynesian Hula Show 6:30 p.m. – 7 p.m. Sunset Jazz Show Sun 5 p.m.- 8 p.m. Mon; Dances of Polynesian 6:30 p.m. – 7 p.m. and Drums of Tahiti 7:30 - 8 p.m; Wed Polynesian Hula Show 6:30 p.m. – 7 p.m.; and Tahitian Dance 7:30 – 8 p.m. All Shows free. Kapalua Bay Hotel 1 Bay Drive, Kapalua, 669-5656 The Bay Club: Jazz trio, Fri and Sat, 6-9 p.m.; solo pianist, Sun-Thu, 6-9 p.m.; Gardenia Court: contemporary Hawaiian music, Sun, 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m.; Lehua Lounge: Free hula show Wednesday and Fridays. 5:15 p.m -8:30 pm. Maui Marriott 100 Nohea Kai Drive, Kaanapali, 667-1200 Nalu’s: Kilohana, Wed, 8-10:30 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort 5900 Honoapiilani Hwy, Napili, 669-1500 Hawaiian Music: Kincaid & Albert, Thu; Kincaid Basques Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed; All Hawaiian music shows from 7-9 p.m. Ritz-Carlton Kapalua One Ritz-Carlton Drive, Kapalua, 669-6200 Lobby Lounge: Live music, 6-10 nightly. Banyan Tree Restaurant: World fusion duo Ranga Pae,Tue-Sat, 6:15-9:45 p.m. Kapalua Indoor Amphitheater: Masters of Hawaiian Slack Key Guitar Concerts series features traditional Hawaiian music. Every Tues 6 p.m.- 8:30 p.m. Tickets: $40 visitor and $30 kama`aina rate. The Legend of Kaulula'au: Young Hawaiians loving their culture and willing to perpetuate an aspect of their Hawaiian culture, the art of storytelling. Every Thur at 7:30 p.m. Tickets: $30 and $27 Kamaaina. 1888-808-1055. Royal Lahaina Resort 2780 Kekaa Drive, Kaanapali, 661-3611 "Eddie and Eddie" w/Eddie Lilikoi and Eddie Sebala, 5-9:30 nightly in the Royal Ocean Terrace. Royal Lahaina Luau featuring authentic Hawaiian and Polynesian song and dance at 5 nightly.
Grand Wailea Resort Hotel & Spa 3850 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-1234 Botero Bar entertainment, 5:30-9:30 Live Music Wed; Strolling Hawaiian duo in the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a nightly. The Fairmont Kea Lani Maui 4100 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-4100 Cafe Ciao Restaurant. Jazz entertainment from 69 nightly. Wailea Marriott 3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-1922 Hawaiian Entertainment w/hula 6-9 nightly in Kumu Bar & Grill. Hawaiian entertainment 9-11 nightly in the Mele Mele Lounge featuring Pam Gamboa Peterson Mon and Sat, Mitch Kepa & Raymond "Mundo" Medeiros. Paradise & Ka Poe O Hawaii perform at the Luau, Mon, Tue, Thu and Fri. Renaissance Wailea Beach Resort 3550 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-4900 Sunset Terrace; Live Hawaiian contemporary music by Lono Mon-Tue; Wed-Thurs Bobby Krueger; Fri Mahalo Greig; Sat Rama Camarillo; Sun Mondo Kane; all sets 6- 9 p.m. Maui Prince Hotel 5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111 Molokini Lounge: Ron Kuala’au, Hawaiian and contemporary guitar and vocals, Sun, 6-10:30 p.m. and Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m. Mele ‘Ohana duo, Mon, Wed. and Fri, 6-8 p.m., Mon-Sat, 8:30-10:30 p.m. and Mon, Wed and Fri, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.
EAST MAUI
Hotel Hana-Maui Hana, 248-8211 Hawaiian Music in Paniolo Lounge, Thu thru Sun, 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Hula show, every Thu and Sun, 7:30-8:15 p.m. in the Main Dining Room.
Sheraton Maui Hotel 2605 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0031 Lagoon Bar Entertainment w/hula dancers, 6-8 nightly: Bobby & Ralph, Thu, Mon and Tue; Ralph & Allan, Fri; Fausto & Kawaika, Sat and Sun; Nathan & Ralph, Wed; torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset, 7-8 nightly. The Westin Maui Hotel 2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525 Tropica: Mitch Kepa, Mon & Sat-Su; Benny Uyetake, Tue-Fri. 6-9 p.m. Tableside magic by Fortunato Tue & Thu, and Wed& Sat 7- 9p.m.
SOUTH MAUI
30
APRIL 28, 2005
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www.mauitimepersonals.com WOMEN Seeking Men WEST MAUI LADY Beautiful, vivacious lady seeking professional, secure N/S SWM, age 45-65, for fun: parties, dancing, dinners, sunsets, beach, movies, music and more. 616262 SEXY MAUI BABE Tall ex-model, blonde mom of three, fitness freak but not a control freak, seeks casual relationship with a nice, similar male. 657288
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For customer service call 1-617-450-8773 or email MauiTime@placepersonal.com ABBREVIATIONS: A-Asian; B-Black; C-Christian; D-Divorced; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; J-Jewish; M-Male; N/S-Non-Smoker; P-Professional; S-Single; W-White GUIDELINES: Personals are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses and have first meetings occur in a public place. This publication reserves the right to edit, revise, or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content of or replies to any ad. Not a service of all ads have corresponding voice messages. To review our complete guidelines, call (617) 425-2636
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1984 MERCEDES 380 SL This classic beauty is Royal Blue with grey leather interior. Always garaged and always maintained. 64K miles. Two tops. Asking $10,800. Call 244-2068
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GOVERNMENT JOBS Earn Up to $12 to $48/Hour. Full RedWeek.com Medical/ Dental Benefits, Paid is the #1 Timeshare Marketplace on the Training. Clerical, Administrative, Internet with 30,000+ Resales, Rentals, Homeland Security, Wildlife, Law Resort Review. Don’t Buy, Rent, or Sell Enforcement, More! 1-800-320-9353 before first Visiting RedWeek.com x2250 (AAN CAN)
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WE BUY & SELL
coins, tokens, medals, stamps, paper money, Hawaiiana, sport collectibles
667- 6155
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FREE 4-ROOM DIRECTV SYSTEM. Standard installation included. 50+ PREMIUM Channels FREE 3 months. Access to over 225 channels! Limited time offer. Restrictions apply, S+H. 1800-877-1251. (AAN CAN)
32
Area 51 Computer Service www.area51maui.com On-Site Repairs & Upgrades Home Office/Networking 298-9274
BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES EARN $3500 WEEKLY! Answering Surveys Online! $25-$75 Per Survey! Guaranteed Paychecks. Process E-mails Online $25.00 Per E-mail. Mystery Shoppers Earn $57.00/Hour Shopping! www.RealCashPrograms.com (AAN CAN)
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Ad Deadline Monday 4pm To Advertise Call 661-3786 Fax Number 808.661-0446 Email classifieds@mauitime.com Website www.mauitime.com Mailing 658 Front Street #126A-7278 • Lahaina, HI Drop off 505 Front St. Ste. 216, Lahaina
APRIL 28, 2005
CLASSIFIED
WANNA HAVE FUN? WANT MORE HOURS?
$50,000 FREE CASH
GRANTS 2005! Never repay! For personal bills, school, new business. Fee for inforTEACH ENGLISH mation. $49 BILLION left unclaimed Travel The World And Get Paid!!! from 2004. Live operators! 1-800-785With Global TESOL College. Please 6418 Ext. #88. (AAN CAN) call for details 1-888-TESOL-US or visit www.GlobalTESOLUSA.com HELP WANTED (AAN CAN) Earn Extra income Assembling CD NEWS FLASH! POLAR ICE CAPS Cases at home. No experience necessary! Start Immediately! 1-800-688MELTING AT ALARMING RATE! 0295 EXT. 870. www.easywork-greatLearn to SCUBA before it’s too late! pay.com (AAN CAN) Dive Today with SHAKA DIVERS, $1,380 WEEKLY POSSIBLE! Professional, Safe, Fun Lessons and Dive Tours. Torpedo Dives, Hydro- Stuffing Envelopes At Home FT/PT. Optix Masks! (808) 250-1234 www. $50 CA$H HIRING BONUS. shakadivers.com it’s SHAKA-RIFIC Guaranteed in writing. 1-800-4698030. (AAN CAN) RANDEM SYSTEMS INVEST$50,000 FREE CASH MENT TRAINING SERVICES Learn to live debt free and have some money from your current income. Learn to invest properly. Do not believe that if you have no money there is nothing that you can do. (808) 344-0256 rsist@randem.com
Bubba Gump Shrimp Company See us today for your interview!!
NOW HIRING ALL POSITIONS Apply in person • Aplique ahora 889 Front St., Lahaina
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Is Seeking Interns. Entry level positions. High school students okay. We will train. • Must Be Bright & Adaptable • School Credit Possible
GRANTS 2005! Never repay! For personal bills, school, new business. Fee for information. $49 BILLION left unclaimed from 2004. Live operators! 1-800-7856360 Ext. #74. (AAN CAN)
• Work With A Fun Team • Gain Valuable Experience
Send resume to: Jen Russo 658 Front St. #126A-7278, Lahaina HI 96761 or call 661-3786 x3#
SETTLEMENT RECIPIENTS! Get the most cash for your structured PENNY STOCK TRADERS settlement. Fast Service. Personal NEEDED! Attention. FREE QUOTE. www.stonGet Rich Trading Penny Stocks at estreet.com 1-800-844-5136 (AAN CAN) home. 500% profit potential. No $$CASH$$ experience necessary. No cost. We Immediate Cash for Structured Train. Apply at www.gopennystock.com (AAN CAN) Settlements, Annuities, Law Suits, Inheritances, Mortgage Notes, & $$ A CASH NOW OFFER $$ Cash Flows. J.G. Wentworth #1 1Turn future money from lawsuit set- (800)-794-7310. (AAN CAN) tlements, lottery awards, and annuity ALL CASH CANDY ROUTE! payments into cash now. Free Quotes 1-800-815-3503 www.ppicash.com Do you earn $800 in a day? Your own local candy route. Includes 30 (AAN CAN) Machines and Candy. All for $9,995. 1-800-807-6525. (AAN CAN)
EMPLOYMENT Looking for Playful Bodyworkers With experience in Massage.. Excellent working conditions. Call 575-5370 *MOVIE EXTRAS* Earn $150-$300/Day All Looks/Types Needed. No Experience Necessary. TV, Music Videos, Commercials, Film, Print. Call Tollfree 7 days! 1-800-2603949 x3025 (AAN CAN)
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Maui Recycling Service If not now, when?
When you subscribe for 3 months of bi-weekly service – (A $25 value!) New customers only – offer expires 4/30/05
VACATION RENTALS INTERNATIONAL COMPANY needs PT and FT help. WORK FROM Friends or Family Visiting Maui? HOME $500-$1500/MO P/T, $2000- Affordable Studio Condo w/ Kitchen. $6000/MO F/T. Call: 573-3203 for free Newly Remodeled, Clean, AC, View booklet. www.joyfulsuccess.com of Pool. Ideal Kihei Location, 2 minute walk to Maui’s Best Swimming BARTENDERS, SERVERS, Beach. Call for rates 875-7893 BARISTAS & SOUS CHEF CLEAN, AFFORDABLE F/T & P/T. A Great Opportunity for Accommodations in our vacation Responsible Applicants. Call 6670787 or apply in person at Java Jazz rental from $49 per day. Call Toll Free Wailuku Guesthouse 877-986-8270 or BODYWORKERS www.wailukuhouse.com Experienced applicants needed for sensual bodywork. Great atmosphere, call 268-8555 MAUI RECYCLING SERVICE $ MODELS WANTED $ Picks up all your glass, plastic, aluFor calendar magazine and artistic minum, tin, mixed paper, & cardboard. print work. Ages 18 to 35. 573-3712 Home Pickup; a convenience for $16/mo! Bi-monthly pick up. 5 People Productions Commercial accounts avail. Call Now! 244-0443 Presents:
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Nonpornographic Nude Portraits Gain experience, Portfolio, $$! Screen testing concludes July 15, 2005 Don’t delay! Discover your potential!
NOTICES ALOHA VALUED READERS We would like to let our readers know that we try to screen most of our ads. We read back the ad copy to ensure that it is the correct information that advertisers want. If you see the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a national ad and was not submitted directly to us. If you have a question directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org
REAL ESTATE FOR SALE
S.&W. MAUI CONDOS from $193,000 fee simple W. & S. MAUI HOMES from $450,000 Surf the Maui MLS Listings at www.barrybrownmaui.com Barry Lee Brown (R) P.O. Box 11782 Lahaina
(808) 661-1800 A portion of every commission is donated to the Surfrider Foundation of Maui
You can sell anything right now. If you can get a person to listen to you for five minutes, you can unload on them, for profit, any number of things you (and your friends) no longer need. Go ahead and try it; you could use the cash, and in my book the gullible are fair game—to some extent. Don’t abuse this power. Make sure that whatever you’re ditching might have some chance of being useful to whoever you’re forcing to pay for it. You have the ability to make each of these transactions a win-win (even if weighted heavily in your favor). Don’t settle for anything but.
You’ve come to a fork in the Yellow Brick Road, my sweet friend. I’m not concerned with which direction you’ll take, just who you’ll become to get there. Will you choose to have the sensitive heart of the woodman, the innocence of the girl, the courage of the lion, or the brains of the scarecrow? Or will you continue in your present mode, embodying the misunderstood wickedness of the witch who stands in the way of all the less miserable parts of you? Okay, yeah, I know your life is way more complicated than a fairy tale, but sometimes looking at your choices in that way can be useful. Try it now.
“we do all the work . . . so you can enjoy your yard”
LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) “The restroom is for customers only,” sniffed the bookstore queen, surveying my bedraggled self with distaste. Having bought tea and given their stock a fair perusal, I said, “Yes, may I use it?” “Are you going to buy something?” he inquired, busily dusting the shelves. I restrained a Leo roar and said delicately: “Where’s the key, please?” He sighed and handed me the key, attached to a wooden letter-M. I put it on the edge of the sink. It promptly tumbled into the basin, with the long chain holding the key spilling into the drain. Pulling on the links, it came up easily—sans key. I wasn’t really embarrassed to hand the keyless “M” back to the bitter queen. I just wish I had done it on purpose. This week, don’t resist the urge to push people’s buttons and cause trouble. It’ll happen anyway—you might as well enjoy yourself.
Jason Meyer 573-1920
VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) You’re a talker. Maybe not on the level of those Geminis or Aquarians, but you know how to use your words. What you’re not quite as good at is communicating without them. Reading others’ body language or being aware of what you’re conveying with yours is an important skill to have. Before you open your mouth this week, see what’s already being said, nonverbally, by you and those you’re with. Make sure your handshake and hug come across as warm and personable as you hope they are, and make sure that what you say hasn’t already been said another way.
HEALTH PRESCRIPTION DIET PILLS No prior prescription needed. Prescription Pain Pills - No doctors fees. Prescription Sleep Aids - US based and FDA approved. Prescription Muscle Relaxer. NextDay Delivery 1-800-715-0445. www.valuerx.biz (AAN CAN)
LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) The endless repetition of this week may have you feeling like a goldfish in a bowl—stared at, fed the same crap every day, and the same boring scenery along the way. Even your reflection has begun to bore you. Before you let ennui really take hold, you should know: This is the kind of week you’ll long for in the weeks to come. Soon, your little world may crack, spilling you in a giant wave out to the next big pond. You’ll have to say goodbye forever to the relatively tiny, safe world you’ve occupied for years. This vision of your future might excite or terrify you. Until it happens, though, try to be surprised by the little plastic castle the next few times it comes around. You’ll miss it when it’s gone.
SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21)
HIV COUNSELING AND TESTING If you feel that you have been potentially exposed to HIV and would like Free, Confidential and Anonymous testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900. It is important to know your HIV status so that you do not unknowingly pass the virus to others, also early detection is vital to your health and treatment. The Maui AIDS Foundation now offers Drop-In HIV Counseling and Testing (No appointment necessary) Drop in hours are Mon.-Fri. 8:30am to 4:30pm, Wed. 8:30am to 7pm 1935 Main Street, Wailuku For more information on HIV/AIDS, STD’s including Viral Hepatitis and HIV Counseling and Testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900. In Hana call 248-7801, Lanai 5656722, and Molokai 553-9086.
CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22)
Maui Lawn Works
You might be horrified to discover that the captivating person who’s recently taken an interest in you is probably attracted to what you consider your worst feature. Yup, that crooked nose, unruly hair, your penchant for altered mind states (to put it tactfully), your introversion. These are all potentially compelling to those prepared to see them holistically. The due date for self-acceptance is coming up, and Cutie’s there to help you feel proud of your least favorite part. You’ve already acknowledged the double-edged sword of your “good” qualities, like your intelligence, or beauty. Now realize that even your faults have virtue.
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GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20)
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ALL AREAS - ROOMMATE.COM. Movie extras Browse hundreds of online listings Actors, Models! Make $100- with photos and maps. Find your $300/day. No Exp. Req., FT/PT All roommate with a click of the mouse! looks needed! 1-800-714-7565 (AAN Visit: www.Roommates.com (AAN CAN) CAN)
Modeling@mac.com
Sometimes you can know too much. Once you understand your own innocence or charm, it ceases to be innocent or charming to everyone else. Escargot, caviar and honey are more delicious in ignorance than when you consider what they really are. And if you truly think about all the shit that’s going down in the world today, anger, frustration and sadness can be incapacitating. Cease your current attempts to understand or explain your creative process! While I would agree that in most situations, knowledge is power, in this case: the less you know, the better. Don’t scare the Muse, she doesn’t like it.
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TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20)
CURBSIDE RECYCLING!
2005 POSTAL POSITIONS!! $17.50-$59.00+/Hour. Full Benefits. Paid training & Vacations. No experience Necessary! Green Card OK! For More Information Call 1-866-329-0801 ext. 1050. (AAN CAN) $1050 WEEKLY INCOME mailing sales brochures from home. Genuine opportunity working with wholesale company. Supplies provided. No selling or advertising. Call 646722-8424 (24 hours). (AAN CAN)
SIGNLANGUAGE
Watch out for bigots, because for some reason they’ll be magnetized towards you this week. Not only that, but they’ll be compelled to loudly proclaim their offensive and backwards viewpoints in your presence, in such a way that you’ll be obliged to refute or counter them, lest onlookers lump you in with such idiocy. Of course, that’s exactly what these assholes want. Don’t engage with them, if at all possible. Just shake your head and walk away. If you find you’ve got to open your mouth before you leave them to their stupidity, try to keep from getting emotionally involved—stay cool and stick to the facts, which as we both know, speak for themselves.
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CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19)
FAX NUMBER 808.661-0446
Capricorns make good bosses, but you can also be immensely valuable employees. This week, regardless of which role you play, take advantage of the harmonious interchanges made possible by a beautiful Venus-Saturn sextile. That means that if you’ve got some tricky questions or requests that you’ve been putting off, now’s the time to make them, since it’ll be easy-peasy, no sweat. Get that raise, or convince one of your coworkers to finally start pulling their own weight. One more minor incentive, in case you’re still daunted from getting real with those you work with: if you really go there, you might even get laid, as a bonus.
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AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18)
WEBSITE
Be hedonistic. The array of new experiences available to you is unfolding wildly in all directions. You’ve suddenly got access to flavors you never even knew existed before. Don’t stick to your old favorites out of timidity. They’ll always be there. Try the new shit, the pistachio chocolate hot pepper or the ginger pumpkin pie ice creams, rather than plain old vanilla. It’s not often that such a buffet of life’s richness is laid out before you. To snub it for the comfort of your armchair and bag of chips would be rude, idiotic and ultimately lame.
www.mauitime.com
PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20)
MAILING
Who says artists can’t get rich? Prove that jackass wrong for such idiocy. Okay, you might not achieve Trumplevel wealth with your creative ventures, but you have a chance to make a few bucks now by doing what you love. I can’t imagine a single good reason why you’d abstain. Dreaming is all very well and good, but don’t let this opportunity slip through your fingers because you’re stuck in a fantasy. Get busy. You’ll always have a chance to dream, but the moment when you can earn some dough from it is right now. Seize it.
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A public health message provided by The Maui AIDS Foundation.
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ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) Let’s take it as a given that, at least to some degree, our perception of “reality” creates that reality. For example, in one of my worst living situations, I lived in a total crack neighborhood with half a dozen speed freaks and all their friends. Their unhealthy relationship with “Tina” seemed to severely and negatively affect their “interface with consensus reality.” What the hell am I talking about? I’m just saying that your current use of constant activity to keep from dealing with the harder stuff in your life is more damaging than an addiction to any hard drug. Slow down, my friend, slow down.
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MAUI TIME WEEKLY
APRIL 28, 2005
33
HOLOHOLOGIRL
BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS
Much of the Same Jazz is an intensified feeling of nonchalance. - Françoise Sagan It always happens when I experience good jazz—that feeling like there’s no other music in the world worth mentioning. It happened the first time a music instructor introduced me to a John Coltrane album. And the first time I heard Billie Holiday, late at night and alone in my room. It also happened a couple weeks ago, when I went to see Dianne Reeves at the MACC’s Castle Theater. Now, I must admit, my knowledge of jazz is limited to the classics—aside from the occasional jazz-funk-fusion band, acid jazz remix or Brazilian jazz vocalist, I’m not that up-to-date on the contemporary stuff. Fortunately, I have friends who are—Friends far cooler than I. Friends who are smarter (ahem, at least musically speaking), more hip (because they would never say “hip,” for one) and definitely cute enough for me to go along with whatever BS they happen to be feeding me at the time. In this case, the bullshit was no bullshit. Seeing Diane Reeves and her band made me vow to never listen to anything but jazz ever again. I was in awe… You go to my head and you linger like a haunting refrain And I find you spinning ‘round in my brain Like the bubbles in a glass of champagne… I couldn’t breathe! I kept getting chills! I was swooning! Nothing but jazz from now on!! Vive le jazz!!! You go to my head with a smile that makes my temperature rise Like a summer with a thousand Julys You intoxicate my soul with your eyes” Anyway, it lasted about two days—until I went to see Jack Johnson and G. Love for the big Kokua Festival at the A&B Amphitheater. And then I forgot all about that silly ‘ol jazz stuff. Technically speaking, we missed G. Love—much to the anguish and sorrow of my girl Kim— and I do believe I was too sloshed to have actually noticed if Jacky-boy was on stage doing jazz hands or if he was just sitting there while hundreds of females shrieked with glee. Honestly, I just couldn’t tell ya. See, that’s what happens when your friend’s parents drop you off at a concert. An evil rawwk concert. And you spend the whole time in the booze line, missing John Cruz and Ozomotli, spilling beer on models, bullying strange men and failing to get your best girl backstage after you’ve been drinking Steel Reserve for $1.59 a six-pack. Turns out that’s not such a great value after all. The rest of the week went much like other weeks. On Friday, TBB, his gal BJ and I went to the Kahului Ale House, where I was once again told that my countenance resembled Mexican food products. “Yeah, you’ve got that whole burrito vibe goin’ on,” said the young man, smiling, before he asked me for my phone number. Mad props to TBB for supplying the pen! After being charmed, then ridiculed, then charmed again by Jedi—of the world’s most beautiful family— and his lovely, waaay more levelheaded girlfriend, the kids and I bid bon voyage to Texas-bound Demune, and were off to Hapa’s in Kihei to check out DJ Rap. And yes, she was even hotter in person. Plus, she could spin a mean CD or two. And then, also like prior weeks, Kim and I took a slightly longer lunch on Thursday with a couple of construction-working buddies, eventually hitting the Westin poolside bar in Ka’anapali and then enjoying after-lunch drinks at the Sly Mongoose. It’s okay. I just told my editor I was listening to jazz. Samantha Campos is still looking for someone to play the glockenspiel in her new wave ‘80s German punk band. MTW
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APRIL 28, 2005
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