12.26 Is Marijuana Medicine?, December 18, 2008, Volume 12, Issue 26, MauiTime

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THURSDAY, DECEMBER 18

2008

VOLUME 12

ISSUE 26

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CONTENTS

VOLUME 12 • ISSUE 26

4 MAUI COUNTY

14

Wurst defines the worst in Letters. Hell freezes over, pigs sprout wings and someone says nice things in Eh Brah! Viagra does something other than give dudes boners in News of the Weird. Rob Report fires off a holiday letter to the County Council, and boy have they been naughty. Coconut Wireless can’t resist making fun of helmet hair. Doug Levin wags a finger at predatory banks and gives tips on how to avoid the credit card crunch. Plus, we offer holiday slackers some last minute gift ideas.

14 FEATURE STORY Greg Mebel investigates the sticky-icky wicket that is Hawaii’s medical marijuana debate.

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION

Unisan in Wailuku serves up sushi, karaoke and more.

Editor: Jacob Shafer Corey Feldman

21 Take 5

Proofreader: Heather Nicholson Contributors: Jessica Armstrong, Caeriel Crestin, Lloyd Dangle, Doug Levin, Rob Parsons, Chuck Shepherd, Ynez Tongson, Barry Wurst II Illustration: Ron Pitts Photography: Sean Michael Hower Webster Art Director: Brittany Shaw Ralph Macchio Graphic Designer: Travis Keenan Tiffin Diane Lane Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers Dana Plato General Manager: Jennifer Russo Harvey Stephens Administrative Executive: Judy Toba Mickey Rooney Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown Shannen Doherty Web Design: Linear Publishing www.linearpublishing.com Publisher: Tommy Russo

MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2008 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime Weekly.

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23 MUSIC SCENE Kate chats with rising reggae artist Brad Watanabe about his new album and upcoming Maui gig.

24 Mind Candy

26 FILM Barry Wurst II says the remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still is Hollywood eco activism gone wrong. And it kind of sucks.

25 First Light 27 Movie Listings

28 DA KINE CALENDAR Kate rolls up the week’s most potent events, including an all ages rock show and a First Light screening.

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36 BACK PAGES 36 Adult Classifieds 37 Local Classifieds 38 Sign Language 39 Mind, Body, Spirit

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LETTERSTOTHEEDITOR THE GIVING SPIRIT The end of the year has come and only a few weeks are left until Christmas. I am happy to see more people reaching out to other families during our economic recession. This year we have had to endure changes and tightening of our financial belts. We are all in this together. Let us all kokua each other. This year let us all focus on what is important to us. Not the material things, or the ton of Christmas gifts under the tree, but the people who are important in our lives. Say thank you to the mail courier, ‘opala pickers and maintenance workers. Give your loose change to the Salvation Army’s red bucket. I am not a rich person—I am a mom and very busy like most—but would it hurt to stop and take a breath? With so many families struggling because of layoffs and cutbacks, the need for kokua is so important. This year I am asking all of you to help at least five individuals or families. If each one of use kokua maybe we can lessen the families who are struggling this holiday season, and every day. The benefits that you will receive will be much more rewarding than any other gift. I have given to Lokahi, Salvation Army and I will be helping at Ka Hale A Ke Ola Homeless Resource Center. I have two more places to go. How many do you have? Please reach out and give. Mahalo. Ipolani Pu, submitted online at mauitime.com

BOO DEVELOPMENT! The idea that we must build a high-end, mega-luxury resort for the rich on the culturally, historically and ecologically sensitive and sacred lands of Makena in order to stimulate or jump-start our ailing economy is fatally flawed. This course of action reminds me of stories I have heard of impoverished families in other lands who are so desperately poor that they feel their only recourse is to sell their young and innocent daughters as prostitutes so that they can put food on their tables. Is this what Maui has come to? Are we so desperate, so blinded by our greed and needs, so lacking in options, that we feel our only recourse is to sell our fair daughter Makena to the rich in order to put food on our tables? County Councilmembers, is this the best you can do for Maui and its people? Where is the vision? Hans Soloman, Kihei

YAY DEVELOPMENT! It’s pretty simple, I don’t understand why more people don’t get it: we are hurting. Bad. We need jobs. Bad. Jobs don’t come from nothing, we need projects to create them. That puts people to work, those people spend

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

money. We all get to keep the quality of life we want. Nobody wants to turn Maui into a parking lot, but we have to build somewhere if we want those jobs. There is always a compromise and that’s what we have to work for. But I’ll say it again because it’s the whole point: we need jobs. Mark M., Lahaina

WAVING GRACE Re Beau Ewan’s story about Kim Ball and the fight for school-sanctioned surf clubs (“Board of Education,” Nov. 20): Keep up the good work, Kim. As a recipient of the benefits of Hawaii’s gift to the world, I applaud your efforts. I spent my early teenage years growing up in a gang-ridden ghetto in L.A. I was introduced to the joy of riding waves by a kid from Hawaii. We spent every moment of weekends and school breaks at the beach riding bodyboards—that kept me out of hanging in the ‘hood and becoming another gangster. The ocean was my focus and looking back now I see it was my salvation from a grim fate. My stepfather saw it was a positive thing and he not only encouraged it, he helped me earn money to buy a board, wetsuit and bus pass. Any adult giving that outlet to kids deserves recognition—kudos again, Kim. Alejandro Escudero, submitted online at mauitime.com

WURST’S WORST Re Barry Wurst’s review of Punisher: War Zone (“Cruel and unusual,” Dec. 11): I haven’t seen it yet, but the worst movie I have ever seen was The Happening; I don’t think it can get any worse than that. J., submitted online at mauitime.com Barry responds: I saw The Happening too and it was the worst film I’d seen all year—until I saw Punisher: War Zone. I also sat through Witless Protection, Over Her Dead Body, In The Name of the King, Babylon A.D., 10,000 B.C. and One Missed Call and, as awful as they all were, I’d still rather revisit them than ever sit through the new Punisher movie again. Mark Wahlberg may have given the worst performance of his career in The Happening, but he’s like De Niro in his prime compared to Ray Stevenson in PWZ.

SEND YOUR LETTERS to the editor via e-mail (letters@mauitime.com), post (Letters to the Editor, Maui Time Weekly, 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793) or fax (808244-0446). All correspondence must include your full name, hometown and phone number. We reserve the right to edit letters. Views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Maui Time Weekly.


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EH BRAH!

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com To the woman who ran the red light and said “sorry.” To the man who said let’s both go for this wave, I’ll go right, you go left. To the kid who had some candy and his mom said we can’t afford it, and put it back without crying. To the guy at the food store who let me in front of him because I only had two things. To the couple that said good morning to me. To the dog owner that picked up after their dog. To the person who stopped for me in the crosswalk. To the guy I see picking up trash every morning on the way to work. To the park cleanup crew. To all the happy people on Maui. Mahalo. Glad to be on Maui.

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NEWSOFTHEWEIRD

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD CHUCK@MAUITIME.COM

COMIC RELIEF

DESPERATE MEASURES

The Christmas Nativity scenes in northeast Spain’s Catalonia region have, for three centuries, featured not only Mary and the Three Wise Men but the ubiquitous “caganer” icon, always portrayed with pants down answering a call of nature (and often so obscured in the scene as to popularize Where’s Waldo-type guessing by children). The origin of the caganer (literally, “pooper”) is unclear, but some regard it merely as symbolic of equality (in that everyone has bowel movements). Catalonia is now home to artists who craft statuettes of religious figures poised to relieve themselves, and the franchise extends to renditions of sports figures and celebrities (and even a squatting President Bush). One family in Girona province sells about 25,000 a year, according to a November dispatch in Germany’s Der Spiegel.

When the Poway Unified School District near San Diego cut teachers’ printing budgets this year, some handout-intensive instructors had to dip into their own pockets to keep their students supplied. Calculus teacher Tom Farber decided in September to sell ad space on page one of his exams, at $10 for a quiz and up to $30 on the semester final. As of November, he told the San Diego Union-Tribune, only parent-sponsored inspirational messages have been bought, but he said he would welcome certain retailers’ ads.

ROAD TRIPPY Larry and Diana Moyer set out in November from Beaver Dam, Wis., in their oversized RV to spend some warm days in St. Petersburg, Fla. Since they travel with their pets, Jack (Diana’s “service” kangaroo) and Edward (an elderly goat that uses a cart for mobility because of front-leg paralysis), their route south was circuitous because of some states’ restrictions on “exotic” pets. The RV broke down three times. In Florida, Larry had a stroke and was hospitalized for two days. Then, a fuse box short-circuited, and the RV burned up, torching their money and ID. Diana was hospitalized for smoke inhalation. With Red Cross help, they found a motel that accepted goats (but not kangaroos, so Jack went overnight to a wildlife facility). At press time, according to a Tampa Tribune report, the couple had bought a junk car and were headed home, with Jack curled up in Diana’s lap.

‘CLICK’ OF

NO PAW RUBS? A British surgeon will spend an estimated 250,000 pounds ($370,000) to equip her luxury home in Gloustershire with a state-of-the-art, three-room suite for her two Great Danes, including cameras so that she can monitor them via the Internet while she is away. Instead of an ordinary dog door, a retina scanner will control entry, and rather than rely on human stewards, the big darlings will be dispensed filtered water and dry food automatically in self-cleaning bowls. A temperature-regulated saline spa is available for relaxing dips before turning in for the night on sheepskin-lined dog beds.

STIFF MEDICINE Latest Off-Label Uses of Viagra: Britain’s The Sun reported in November that Calvin Muteesa, 2, of South London has been forced to take Viagra four times a day since he was 3 months old to stave off a potentially fatal case of pulmonary arterial hypertension. And Bentley, a 7year-old springer spaniel, has apparently recovered from a potentially fatal lungworm attack on his chronically weak heart via a Viagra regimen at a clinic in Highgate, England. (And last year, Argentinean researchers discovered that hamsters fed Viagra endured the rigors of jet lag about 50 percent better than hamsters fed a placebo.) MTW

THE WEEK

If you believe in capitalism and the entrepreneurial spirit but aren’t a ruthless bastard, check out kiva.org, a site dedicated to delivering “micro loans” to burgeoning businesspeople in the developing world. Kiva’s aim is to give everyday folks who have comfortable lives but aren’t Bill Gates or Oprah an opportunity to assist those in need, in the form of a jumpstart rather than a handout. Sure there’s kind of a weird undercurrent of tossing-coins-from-the-carriage classism, but the service indisputably connects people from disparate cultures and backgrounds and helps reveal our shared humanity. That’s worth a click by itself. –JS

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

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ROBREPORT

BY ROB PARSONS ROBPARSONS@EARTHLINK.NET

Christmas at Makena An open letter to the County Council Dear Maui County Councilmembers, t’s the time of year when children are writing holiday letters, sending their hopes and dreams to a mysterious, omnipotent man who they believe can grant their wishes. No, not Everett Dowling... I’m writing this letter for a different reason. I want to let you know how disappointed I am—disappointed in you for crushing the hopes of many in our community who dared to hope that we might stop urbanizing our most valuable assets in order to provide for the needs of today. Your review of plans to rezone hundreds of acres at Makena Resort has been slipshod and hasty, and you’ve shown little grasp or understanding of the foundational causes of our sagging economy. Somehow you have allowed yourselves to be mesmerized by promises of jobs, and have lost sight not only of the laws you are sworn to uphold but of common sense and a true vision for the future that benefits all of our community. If Maui’s children of today could look to the Makena of the future, they might be shocked to see a private, “Members Only” millionaire’s enclave where once stood proud Hawaiian fishing and farming villages and places of worship. I pray that you are visited in the night by ghosts of Makena past, present and future, so you may see the consequences of your actions in bargaining away this precious resource, one of Maui’s most inspiring wild, open places. While some limited future development in this area may be acceptable, there should first be careful review of a master plan and, as many have stated, an updating of the Environmental Impact Statement prepared 34 years ago, when access to the area was via a dirt road. Who at that time could have conceived that the current Maluaka project would market condos at prices from $4-$14 million, or that the county water resources would be strained far beyond what can be supplied for already-approved developments. Earlier this year, you passed approvals for 1,400 new units and a golf course at Wailea 670/Honua`ula, without a proven water source. Likewise, you up-zoned 179 acres on Kahului’s outskirts for more retail and light industrial sprawl. Can any of you “show me the

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

water” for that project, or the 40 acres of affordable houses to be built adjacent to Maui Lani as an adjunct to the approval? Of course, both these projects also claimed to provide more construction jobs, above and beyond the thousands of housing units already on the books island-wide. So, do you really buy that rezoning 600 more Makena acres into urban uses will magically provide jobs, as claimed? The truth is that 152 Makena Resort acres are already zoned for single-family homes and apartment usage. More than 1,000 units could be built, making the entire build-out of Makena more like 2,000 new units, with an unspecified number of affordable units to be built elsewhere in South Maui. And let’s hold onto that thought—you’re willing to let the developer off the hook for providing affordable housing, after fighting

ther testifiers have reminded you that segregating housing units by price is not in compliance with the Kihei-Makena Community Plan requirement to put a mix of housing price ranges in any development area. Why, then, do you choose not to uphold this provision? Councilmember Danny Mateo: I applaud your “nay” vote to uphold the integrity of the Workforce Housing Policy you helped craft for the benefit of families on Maui. I wish you luck in convincing your colleagues to stand by you, and by local families hoping to one day own a home of their own. Councilmember Mike Victorino: Can you explain why you joined members Michelle Anderson and Jo Anne Johnson in requesting a nighttime public meeting held in South Maui for Wailea 670, but did not offer the same opportunity for the revised

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keep money on Maui. You have looked to put a cap on new timeshare developments. So how do you justify support for a project that is 90 percent owned by Wall Street’s Morgan Stanley? Why didn’t you demand a review of their long-term financial viability, given the shaky status of other large investment firms and shutdowns of projects at both Wailea and Kapalua? Councilmember Gladys Baisa: We all know that serving on the council is a rigorous, often tedious task. Surely everyone needs time to rest and rejuvenate. But as you vacation in Mexico while the community and your colleagues debate this vital matter, some of us wonder what you would have said to defend the zoning approvals. Councilmember Joe Pontanilla: The Maui News reported that you were

What is the rush to gift wrap this multi-billion dollar approval before year’s end? You are giving away an irreplaceable part of our heritage; you are stealing from future generations. so hard two years ago to pass the Workforce Housing Policy? You should be requiring that 50 percent of all units be affordable, as you did with Wailea 670: 700 market-price units and 700 affordables. Instead, you reduced that number to 800 market-price units and 400 affordables for Makena. Then, you retreated further when Mr. Dowling suddenly produced a letter from one of the project lenders, Fillmore Capital Partners of San Francisco, saying that a requirement to supply even that reduced number could be a “dealbreaker” for the project. Auwe! So please, tell the people of Maui, how many affordable units do you think will be built, where, when and what impacts will they bring?

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Makena project? Don’t working people and students deserve the opportunity to share their concerns? Or is the protracted public testimony something you merely endure, but that isn’t likely to sway your beliefs? Councilmember Bill Medeiros: You changed your vote to a “nay” on Wailea 670 after expressing your concern, as a Native Hawaiian, over ceded land issues. You have heard similar concerns over the proposed Makena lands, so can you explain the difference in voting “yes” this time around? Councilmember Riki Hokama: Over the past two years you showed great concern over handing Maui’s future to off-island developers. You proposed a ban of big box stores to help protect local businesses and

struggling to find the right words to express your “yes” vote, that you were moved by Maui Prince Hotel workers’ testimony that they could lose their jobs and by construction industry officials looking for an economic stimulus. Does it not bother you that these workers were used as pawns by the developer to help create sympathy to achieve his objectives? It was reported that they were paid a regular day’s wage to show up and sport their “Makena-YES!” T-shirts. Part of the overall plan is to demolish the hotel, and at a minimum, Makena workers would be driving through construction traffic daily for the next 15 years. Should bailouts also be offered to other


ROBREPORT resorts suffering from low occupancy, out of fairness? Councilmember Molina: As Land Use Chair, you should have required a revised, complete application for zoning. One of the requirements is submittal of a complete project plan and development plan, showing building and parking sites within the overall resort plan. Failing to comply with the zoning ordinance puts the county in a precarious legal position. The potential of legal bills and a buyout are a hundred-fold what similar oversights cost taxpayers at Montana Beach. Just something to ponder on the long flight as you take your family to Las Vegas for the holidays. on Sturtz, sage leader of Maui Tomorrow who passed away one year ago, once said that any project requiring 40-plus conditions to try to make it acceptable must be fatally flawed to begin with. While Councilmember Anderson is to be congratulated for her painstaking, thorough crafting of 44 conditions for the proposed rezoning of 603 acres, it must be pointed out that these same conditions do not apply to the 152 acres already approved for development. And frankly, the county has a poor track record of insuring that conditions of zoning are enforced years later when a project is underway. Had the council asked for a legal opinion on whether a Supplemental EIS is required after three decades and numerous changes, there could have been an opportunity to conduct proper legal assessment of potential project impacts. So what is the rush to gift wrap this multi-billion dollar approval before year’s end? You are giving away an irreplaceable part of our heritage; you are stealing from future generations. Have any of you seen the aerial photos on the Maluaka Web site, of mass grading all the way down to the shoreline, fronting one of the most beautiful coral reef eco-systems on Maui? Had Maui received the big rains that dumped on Kauai and Oahu last week, countless tons of mud and silt would have been carried to the ocean, much like the torrents that swept through the Palauea Mauka project in October 2003. Many testifiers have sung the praises of the development’s front man, Everett Dowling. Others have reminded you that he has not always lived up to his word. I encourage you to stick to the complex issues of zoning impacts, and not to let personalities color your perspective. You are being asked to review an enormous zoning change in the Makena region, not to decide whether the project

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BY ROB PARSONS ROBPARSONS@EARTHLINK.NET

applicant is an upstanding, philanthropic citizen. Likewise, please don’t misconstrue my concerns and constructive criticism as a personal attack. My interest is to help envision a future we can all agree is the best, wisest possible choice for our community. But it’s clear to me that you have taken shortcuts in your responsibilities to give this project proper, legal review. That concerns me, because it puts us all at risk. Like a parent or a stern schoolteacher, I’m here to tell you that I expect better, and that you haven’t done your work well enough to earn a passing grade. Ten years ago, during council review of the Upcountry Community Plan revision, Lance Collins, then a teenager, stepped to the microphone. Without saying a word, he pulled out a camera and took photos of

the councilmembers. “I just want to be able to remember,” Collins said after the tense silence, “who were the councilmembers that forever changed the nature of Upcountry Maui.” What will be your personal legacy as public servants to our island community? Are you OK with having your names etched on security gate plaques through the Makena region? Or is it possible there is something of greater value that we all can work together to achieve? early thirty years ago, plans were drawn up for condominiums fronting Big Beach, now the centerpiece of Makena State Park. It took years of dedicated efforts to acquire the land for public usage; it was an inspiring, collaborative community effort. What have you set in motion to help encourage a similar win-win

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for the proposal in front of you today? I extend a heartfelt holiday greeting and well wishes to departing member Michelle Anderson. Mahalo nui loa for your exemplary public service, and a tip of Santa’s cap to Jo Anne and Danny, as well. To those of you who have voted “yes” to Makena rezoning: May you find time amid the busy holidays to drive to Makena and experience the serenity, the beauty, the mana, and to view the places that stand to be changed forever. My simple wish is that the mana of this place may touch your heart and guide your actions on behalf of the community you represent. Mele Kalikamaka, and Malama Makena. MTW The County Council will meet again to discuss the Makena rezoning Friday, Dec. 19 at 2pm.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

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MAUICOUNTY

COCONUT WIRELESS THE WEEK IN REVIEW

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

deliver a pep talk to the Maui Visitors Bureau, as reported in The Maui News. Discussing past downturns, including the ones that followed the first Gulf War and the 9/11 attacks, Lingle was quoted as saying “you could fire a cannon without hitting anybody” at Kahului Airport. Really— fire a cannon? At an airport? Whether it was an off-the-cuff remark or part of a prepared speech I’m not sure, but either way Lingle might want to think twice before tossing out that chestnut again.

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 12

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 10 There are political scandals and then there are political scandals. Some are dry and wonkish and need to be sexed up for public consumption through oversimplification and perhaps the addition of the nonsensical-butperennially popular “gate” suffix. Other scandals need no embellishment. The exploits of Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich fit firmly into the latter category. Not only did this guy—whose funny name and impossibly puffy helmet hair already made him an easy target for cheap mockery—try to auction off Obama’s Senate seat, he didn’t even bother to talk in code when discussing the deal over the phone. Also, he tried to shake down a children’s hospital. If all this had happened in a movie, critics would have derided it as “titillating but wholly unbelievable.” Of course, corruption and Chicago politics are familiar bedfellows, but ol’ Rod is trying to make malfeasance an Olympic sport. Maybe the most depressing aspect (and there are plenty to choose from) has been the efforts of Fox News to do the “guilt by association” thing and connect the dots to the Obama Administration, mostly by running the same three stock photos of the President-elect and Blagojevich standing close to each other while saying something like, “there is no evidence of any wrongdoing on Obama’s part…yet.”

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 11 An unfortunate choice of words: Gov. Lingle hopped the pond yesterday to

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

So I got hit by a terrible stomach bug last night. I’ll spare you the gory details, but suffice it to say I’ve become intimately acquainted with the stack of old magazines on the back of my toilet. One of them, the post-election issue of Time, had an interesting essay by Pico Iyer about a chance encounter he had with Obama at a burger joint on Oahu in 2006. Though a little cloyingly fanboyish, the piece ends with a nice summation of the hopes many have pinned on the new commander in chief: “[T]he past and the future that [Obama] speaks for are precisely the ones that belong so uniquely to the new century and the 95 percent of humans who are our neighbors at the global burger table. It’s more than possible to make your fortune in Alaska—but I’d much rather find the future in Hawaii.”

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 13 OK, so the jokes and snide remarks about Blagojevich’s hair have already gotten stale, but I have to repeat the one from tonight’s SNL Weekend Update segment (a fond adios to Amy Poehler by the way, one of the funniest women on television): “Hey Rod, it looks like you’re wearing a toupee that’s also wearing a toupee.”

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 14 Not cool: The Associated Press reports that someone set fire to Sarah Palin’s church in Wasilla, Alaska while people, including a couple of kids, were inside (no one was seriously injured). Clearly this was the act of a deranged individual (and, to be fair, authorities have not said whether the Palin connection factored in, but come on). Man, this is just what we need: a stupid messed up act of violence that gives ammo to the far right in their ongoing war with secular rationalists (aka church torching, ACLU joining, flag desecrating terrorist lovers). I can hear Sean Hannity screaming already…In other news: Have you seen the footage of that Iraqi journalist throwing his shoe at Bush’s head during a press conference? (If not, a quick Google search will deliver the goods.) Wow, that guy is my new hero. The best part of the ensuing coverage has been mainstream media outlets explaining that, in Muslim culture, this is considered an insult. Um, I know the soles of the

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Now that’s a follow-up question! feet have an especially negative connotation for followers of Islam, but I’m pretty sure hurling a wingtip at someone’s dome is a universal sign of disrespect.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 15 If it wasn’t before, it now seems clear that the main tourism-related issue isn’t so much getting people to come to Hawaii (even in lean times the Aloha State is still a prime destination); it’s getting people to jump islands after landing in Honolulu. That theory is bolstered by the latest hotel occupancy figures, which show Oahu within 1 percent of last year’s numbers, while Maui, Kauai and the Big Island continue to suffer declines for which the word “freefall” is more understatement than hyperbole. After resisting for too long, Maui hotel operators are finally getting the message that they’ve got to lower rates if they want to fill beds, but even that may not be enough. It’s gloomy, but it’s also reality. So this is where the “let’s get creative” spirit takes over, and we re-imagine the Valley Isle in terms other than a revolving door for tourists to dump their cash and catch a sunburn. Right? Right? (A note to readers with photographic memories and/or way too much time on

their hands: I know several weeks ago I promised I wasn’t going to write about hotel occupancy numbers again until the news was good, but that was in my other column, the Business End. So yes, I’m escaping on a technicality.)

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 16 Why is it that whenever an African runner wins a marathon I have to hear from some idiot claiming the result is proof that blacks and whites are genetically different and therefore [insert vile racist conclusion]? The latest example of this disturbing phenomenon arrived in my inbox this morning, two days after Kenyan runners finished first through fifth in the Honolulu Marathon. I’m not going to re-print the contents of the email or even summarize the argument, a term I’m using very loosely. It’s just sad that somewhere out there is a guy (the message was unsigned—surprise, surprise—but I’m assuming guy) who took the time to sit down at his keyboard and commit this pile of brain spew to writing, then send it off to various media outlets, presumably with the hope that it would reach as many eyeballs as possible. I mean, get a hobby dude. MTW

OVERHEARD... Woman (searching for keys): Every time I lose something you tell me I’m an idiot. Man: Well quit telling me when you lose stuff. - Safeway parking lot, Kahului


MAUICOUNTY

BY DOUG LEVIN DOUG@MAUITIME.COM

Credit where it’s due Some banks are using the financial crisis to reap inflated credit card profits. Here’s what you can do… either a borrower nor a lender be. If you’ve been reading the news lately, this other famous line from Hamlet probably rings true. The current financial crisis is putting a strain on one of America’s favorite sources of easy funds: credit cards. Even before the crisis hit, some banks were raising fees and establishing “penalty rates”

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Unfortunately, this situation is especially tough on everyday Mauians, many of whom have lost their jobs or seen their hours slashed due to painful drops in tourism. For people who are just keeping up with their bills, one payment arriving a day late at the Mainland processing center can now double the monthly credit card tab. That can be a financial back-breaker.

at the end of the third quarter out of almost 9,000 in the U.S. Comparatively, more than 1,000 failed during the savings and loan crisis. Also consider that the fed funds rate is at 1 percent, matching the lowest in history and creating the largest-ever disparity between rates and what it costs banks to borrow. Add the fact that 90 percent of all credit card accounts are

Credit is primarily a force for good, not evil. However, like all good things it must be used in moderation. for late payment; now those already high rates are jumping to as much as 36 percent annually, and many banks are lowering or even closing credit lines without warning.

Although the news is filled with doom and gloom for banks, it’s time to start questioning whether most banks actually need to raise their rates. There were only 171 banks on the FDIC’s watch list

Faced with this, what’s a smart Mauian to do? Well, regardless of whether your bank is actually in distress or just hiding behind it, if they’ve ever warned you that they’ll raise your interest rate if you pay late, follow these steps to ease your way: • Don’t pay late. A single day makes a difference. It gets worse if you’re late 30 days because then other banks can raise your rate when it appears on your credit report • Keep good credit. Banks can also raise rates if your credit score goes down for other reasons.

held by just 10 companies, few of which appear to be in financial trouble, and you begin to wonder whether healthy banks are using the crisis as a cover to increase profits unreasonably.

• Set your credit cards up on automatic payment, so you don’t miss a payment. This is especially important given the mail lag between here and the mainland.

CREDIT continued on page 12

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MAUICOUNTY

BY DOUG LEVIN DOUG@MAUITIME.COM

CREDIT, continued from page 11 • If you are late, ask your bank not to impose the penalty rate. • If one is imposed and they won’t waive it, strongly consider canceling that card immediately. You’ll still be able to pay it off over time. Also, read the rate and penalty sections of all your credit card agreements carefully and consider closing accounts and transferring balances to friendlier ones. Obviously this is easier before you get into financial trouble, but is still possible even if you’re struggling. OK, all that being said, here’s something to remember: Despite

the recent bad news and the struggles and debt many are facing, the fact is that the creation of capital and credit markets was one of the keys to our country’s success. This is because for the first time tremendous funds could be collected together and invested in worthy enterprises like railroads, steamships, manufacturing, etc. that strengthened our economy and ultimately improved our quality of life. This extends to individuals as well: without credit a limited number of Americans would be homeowners, and far fewer people could ever hope to buy new cars or start small businesses. So credit is primarily a force for good, not evil—especially when it’s used

for acquisitions that give value for years, like a home. However, like all good things it must be used in moderation. One of the best metaphors for the current financial crisis is the country, and the entire world, waking up with a hangover from a credit binge. Now all of us, borrowers and lenders alike, need to learn to indulge more carefully. MTW

Doug Levin is a Maui-based CPA.

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GIFTGUIDE

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

Last minute gifts You waited…and waited. Instead of panicking, buy this stuff

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ociety heaps shame on the last minute

READ

gifter. The holiday sales and Christmas commercials begin before the Halloween

decorations have been taken down. Everywhere you look are big glittering reminders that this is the season of giving, dammit, so get out there and give! As Black Friday recedes into hazy memory and the calendar turns to December, the pressure increases. Have you finished your shopping? Have you finished your shopping? Haveyoufinished

yourfreakinshopping?!? What’s a seasonal slacker to do? Eventually the

When You Are Engulfed in Flames David Sedaris Sedaris has his detractors, and some of the criticism’s deserved. But his latest collection of musings is definitely worth tossing on the coffee table or the back of the toilet (and really, I mean that as a compliment). It’s got the requisite wit, but also an undercurrent of darkness and regret as the writer stares down his 50th birthday and wonders how fast the final years will fly.

Yuletide heat will reach its boiling point and you’ll be left with two choices: retreat from humanity altogether and go live among the trees and geckos out in Hana until the comfort and joy have passed and it’s safe to return to civilization; or, suck it up and go make some purchses. Which begs the inevitable question—what to give? If you’ve waited until the last minute, you can forget doing the whole anti-consumerism, homemade, I-whittled-it-myself thing. No time.

America (The Book): Teacher’s Edition Jon Stewart If the people on your list already own the original, there’s not quite enough new material here to justify adding it to the collection. If, however, you’re buying for someone who has yet to flip through this scalding sendup of both American history and the clichéd classroom textbook, shove this in their stocking.

Also, toss those fancy, elaborate knick-knacks and whatnots right out the window. They’ve probably been bought up, and even if they haven’t, that’s just not you. Chances are you’re simple; you’re direct. You give the same kind of gifts for Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries and Arbor Day. The timeless (read: easy) gifts. Herewith, a few ideas to get you started (and remember, patronize local businesses whenever possible). Then you can go back to your undecorated home, crack open a bottle of non-holiday

Infinite Jest David Foster Wallace The world lost a great talent this year in Wallace, a man who weaved sentences like roller coasters and achieved critical darling status, but in the end was consumed too quickly by the same demons that stoked his creative fire. Whether you’re looking to acquaint someone with Wallace’s work or merely give a reminder of his genius, this is the place to start.

beer and watch It’s a Wonderful Life (but only to make fun of it, of course).

LISTEN Harps and Angels Randy Newman For fans of “Short People” and “Political Science” whose hearts have been broken slightly by Newman’s career transition to Disney jinglemaker, this album is the ideal antidote. It doesn’t measure up to Newman’s best work, but irony-tinged ballads like “A Few Words in Defense of Our Country” harken back to edgier days.

“What Up Man” The Cool Kids It still blows my mind that hiphop has been around long enough to give rise to nostalgia. But that’s the best way to describe this bouncy track, which transports you to a simpler, catchier time when Run-D.M.C. ruled the roost. Go ahead, give it a listen— I dare you not to smile.

We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank Modest Mouse I know it came out last year, but this album contains the best smokers’ anthem since “Smoke Two Joints” (“Fire it Up”) and one of my favorite lines in a while (“it would have been could have been worse than you would ever know/the dashboard melted but we still had the radio”). It’s really more of a summer record, but hey, this is Maui.

WATCH The Wire, the complete series First, a word of caution: This show will eat up a large chunk of your life. Like the drugs that flow through the center of its labyrinthine plot, HBO’s five-season cop drama (and seriously, never has that description been more inadequate) is highly addictive. It’s also arguably the best series in the history of television.

It’s Bad For Ya George Carlin Another razor-sharp linguistic master who left the world poorer this year, Carlin went out with a bow, performing and recording this hour-long HBO special just months before his death. I was lucky enough to be in attendance at the taping and I can tell you firsthand: old George was feisty—and hilarious—to the end.

Planet Earth Especially if you know someone with a really nice high-def TV, buy this incredible series. More than any Earth Day telethon or Al Gore PowerPoint, it’ll make you appreciate the fragile, brutal, breathtaking beauty of this bluegreen orb we all call home. MTW

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Is Marijuana Medicine? As cops keep busting suppliers, politicians keep debating in circles and patients keep suffering, Hawaii’s medical pot law threatens to go up in smoke. By Greg Mebel

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t’s 3am and Terry Murphy can’t sleep. Her muscles spasm, her joints hurt and she has a pounding migraine. This was her life every few hours, from age 33 until three and a half years ago. She’s now 54. In a neat and clean home in Kihei, Terry lives with her 84-year-old widowed mother and a cat. She suffers from hereditary hemochromatosis, which happens to be the most common genetic disorder among Caucasians. Basically, her body absorbs too much iron; if not diagnosed in time, it’s fatal. Symptoms include severe arthritis and organ damage. One of the ways it’s treated is by bleeding a person on a regular basis so iron levels are reduced. Before arriving in Maui, her method to reduce pain and get some sleep was humongous amounts of codeine, as much as 250 pills a month. That lasted for decades, and sleep lasted about 3-4 hours at a time. The side effects weren’t good. Once on Maui, a doctor recommended she visit Patients Without Time (PWT), a medical marijuana cooperative in Paia. Her mother said, “No way. You won’t do that in my house.” But they both went to Paia where they were counseled and given a small amount of cannabisinfused chocolate pudding. Terry tried it—and it worked, for the whole night, with no ill side effects. That was three years ago. “I get the same strain [of cannabis] they give to the MS [multiple sclerosis] people,” says Terry. After a while, she switched to using cannabis-infused butter so she could cook her own food and save some money. No insurance covers medical marijuana. So she pays $100 for 24 day’s worth, much less than the $250 a month for codeine, and with results that have changed her and her mother’s life. “It’s been remarkable. Really night and day,” says Terry’s mom. She says she taught her daughter and (healthy) son to stay away from drugs and the people who did them. And they did. Growing up, Terry never smoked pot and she still isn’t interested. She says the butter has a minimal amount of THC, which is what causes the typical recreational high from marijuana buds. Mother and daughter both see this as a com-

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pletely different thing, though they don’t tell neighbors or many family members for fear they might not understand. “As far as I understand it, no one has ever overdosed or died from marijuana,” says Terry’s mom. “Hemlock isn’t illegal, and that will kill you.” But on November 11, Patients Without Time ceased operations. Terry says she now has no way to get her medicine, and she’s scared. Already her past symptoms are coming back. She’s worried she’ll be forced to return to the Mayo Clinic, where she spent time when she took a turn for the worse in the past. A slight woman, Terry says she’s “too afraid” to buy marijuana on the black market. She doesn’t know how to grow it, and beyond that it’s illegal to buy plants to start. “I know parents worry about kids getting a hold of marijuana plants. That’s one of the reasons it’s not practical for us to grow it in our garden here [in a Kihei neighborhood],” she says, explaining she doesn’t want to be responsible for creating a tempting, easy way for neighborhood kids to pluck plants from her yard. “PWT was providing that service,” her mom adds. “So what can you do?” Terry asks while rubbing painful joints in her hands.

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rian Murphy, founder of Patients Without Time and Maui County Citizens for Democracy in Action, was the alleged kingpin of a November 11 Maui drug bust. The culmination of “Operation Weedkiller,” the bust netted seven men, arrested after two years of police investigation. Charges range from criminal conspiracy to commercial promotion of marijuana. Murphy’s trial is scheduled for February. A disabled veteran, Murphy says he uses pot to ease pain from a degenerating disc and to help with a neurological disease. Prescription pain medicine didn’t agree with him. By using cannabis he’s been able to stop prescription pain meds altogether. But that’s just the beginning of Murphy’s story. On the door of PWT, there are a multitude of decorations, drawings and announcements; the largest and


most prominent is an 8” x 11” white piece of paper emblazoned with the words “Democracy Is Not a Spectator Sport” in large, plain black font. “I could be a millionaire right now and no one would know who I was if I just wanted to deal pot,” Murphy says. He claims he’s not in it for money. If he were, he wouldn’t be testifying to change laws in Honolulu, organizing petition drives and operating out in the open. Indeed, Murphy can be found online, in print and in the public advocating for legal medical cannabis. He says he’s been with too many suffering people, literally at their last dying breaths, not to take action. “As a man I couldn’t face myself in the morning if I didn’t help people on a personal level,” he says.

“I could be a millionaire right now and no one would know who I was if I just wanted to deal pot.” - Brian Murphy, founder, Patients Without Time

Murphy first fought for legalized medical marijuana in Virginia, then in California. He moved to Maui in 2002. One of the reasons to come here was to push for a working system of medical cannabis distribution for patients. In other states critics cite difficulties with interdiction (pot being illegally transferred across state lines). In Maui, that’s not an issue since Hawaii doesn’t border any other states. Interestingly however, being in Maui brings up other interdiction issues. For example, a patient can’t legally bring pot from one island to the next. The federal government doesn’t recognize any form of legal marijuana and controls the waterways and airways between islands. Though cannabis for patients is not kapu (prohibited) here, to acquire cannabis, patients first need a doctor’s recommendation. There are several doctors on-island who recommend it for specific ailments. Patients then register with the state Narcotics Enforcement Division and receive a blue registration card. Registered patients may have pot, grow it or have someone grow it for them. If there’s a third party involved or if any money changes hands, they’ve broken the law. Murphy, whose PWT organization has more than 300 members, says 90-95 percent of patients can’t grow the medicine they need themselves. It’s this wrinkle, Murphy says, PWT was trying to smooth over. “The law’s kapakai. It’s unworkable,” he says.

According to Murphy, members go through the following process: he or his staff has the patient fill out some initial paperwork. They check blue card certification status and the patient’s medical records. Members are required to sign a document saying they are knowingly committing an act of civil disobedience, since “doing reefer” is illegal according to federal law. Finally, patients pay $100 to become a member of a medical marijuana cooperative; as a member, they have access to caregivers’ marijuana in return for a “storage fee.” State quantity limits apply, and if members can’t afford the storage fee, it’s waived. Whether that model of getting pot to patients is legal or not will be the crux of the court case in February. The Maui Police Department says it isn’t. Regardless, Murphy asserts, PWT operated in this fashion since 2002 without serious interference. “Our doors are open. The police could’ve walked in anytime and seen what we’re all about,” says Murphy. Murphy thinks he might know why he and others were arrested now, instead of years ago. On November 17, 2007, Murphy says he was robbed and pistol-whipped by intruders. He says they broke his front door down. After the episode he required 14 stitches across his forehead. Murphy alleges the robbers stole $300 and pot. When police came to investigate, he claims in a court case he filed against the Chief of Police, Maui Police Department, the county and the state, he recognized two of the officers as the former masked intruders. At that point, according to Murphy, the investigation into the robbery, which netted nothing, turned into an investigation into his medical marijuana, which also netted nothing. He filed suit on October 31. Eleven days later, Patients Without Time was busted.

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ince both cases are pending in court, Maui Police can’t comment too specifically. But Vice Section Commander Captain Gerald Matsunaga says “there’s no evidence marijuana is a cure for anything, that’s why law enforcement is against it.” Still, he says his officers aren’t bothering with medical marijuana patients “with legitimate medical marijuana permits if they are operating within the law.” Though patients or caregivers may legally grow seven plants (three mature and four immature), Matsunaga says they catch people “with over 100 plants.” People they arrest for cocaine, crystal meth or oxycontin often have marijuana on them too, according to Matsunaga. Maui Chief of Police Thomas Phillips backs up his captain’s sentiments, saying he personally has never heard of a contact between a certified user and MPD where the user is actually acting within the law. Phillips wrote to the state legislature in January testifying against a proposed task force studying the efficacy of current medical cannabis distribution rules. “Marijuana has been determined to be the gateway drug. It is no wonder that we consistently rank in the top seven states in the nation in regards to marijuana plants eradicated, and consequently

have one of the worst crystal methamphetamine problems in the nations. Maui County and the State of Hawaii doesn’t [sic] need more marijuana related crimes, and more people addicted to marijuana,” Phillips wrote. Speaking with Maui Time Weekly he said, “We’ve seen where the marijuana industry has financed other drugs, where you could make more money on it.” Phillips asserts that most criminal problems relate back to drugs and alcohol. “We’re opposed to all of them,” he says. Even the illegal sale of pharmaceuticals is a “growing problem” on island, according to the chief. There is opposition to Patients Without Time within the community as well. George Fontaine, a retired MPD captain and recent unsuccessful candidate for the South Maui State House seat, penned a Viewpoint piece in the November 30 issue of The Maui News. “I certainly don’t want a neighborhood pot shop in my community and I am certain many of you don’t either,” he wrote. He ended his piece by admonishing his former political rival, state Rep. Joe Bertram III (D - Kihei), a medical marijuana supporter and user, to concentrate on loftier matters than medical pot. “The small minority of drug dealers and users can wait,” wrote Fontaine.

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he state legislature decided medical use of “Maui wowie” should be allowed back in 2000. With the vote, Hawaii became the first of now 13 states with medical marijuana programs and the first where lawmakers introduced the chnage instead of citizens. There is widespread support on Maui and across the Aloha State for easing marijuana restrictions. A 2005 Maui News poll found nine of 10 residents thought the U.S. Congress should amend cannabis laws. Participation in the state medical registry program has grown 87 percent since 2006, according to the Department of Public Safety, with 867 registered users in Maui County alone. Still, questions remain about whether current law adequately allows the medical marijuana program to function if it simultaneously bans dispensaries like PWT. Hawaii’s state congress overwhelmingly voted “aye” last session to form a task force to study the issue. Ultimately, the measure was vetoed by Gov. Linda Lingle in July. She wrote that a task force would just be looking to “circumvent federal law.” Under federal law, marijuana is classified as a Schedule 1 narcotic, meaning it’s considered less medically useful than crack or ice. Rep. Bertram says that’s just a “smokescreen.” He says there are plenty of state laws that stand in opposition to federal laws and that the police and the Governor work for the state, not the feds. “They’re actually abrogating their responsibility as employees of the state [if they prevent the medical marijuana program from working],” he says. “The Attorney General [Mark Bennett] said this himself.”

Continued on next page

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Continued from previous page Bertram, a registered blue card holder, isn’t sure what Maui patients will do if PWT’s doors are permanently closed. “Many patients are elderly and don’t know where to go. Kalama Park, I guess,” he ventured. He says there’s too much heavy-handedness in the way pot is dealt with in Hawaii, too many people are uninformed about marijuana’s “scientifically proven benefits” and that police don’t understand it takes “too much” for most people to grow the type of Rep. Joe Bertram ganja they need to treat their particular ailment. Bertram has a radical plan for reducing the stigma: he’s going to start growing cannabis in his legislative office in Honolulu starting in January 2009. “That way, people will be able to see it’s just a plant,” he says. “It grows. You can touch it.”

State Rep. Joe Bertram has a radical plan for reducing the stigma attached to medical marijuana: he’s going to start growing cannabis in his legislative office in Honolulu.

BOUNTY MUSIC

Bertram argues that the money MPD spent to run a two-year investigation of PWT could’ve been used for other things. In 2005, Nobel Prize-winning economist Milton Friedman and 500 other economists endorsed a Harvard University report on the costs of cannabis regulation. The report found $10-$14 billion could be saved annually by switching the national focus from cannabis prohibition to cannabis regulation.

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

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ack in Kihei, Terry Murphy remains in a quandary. The state has said it believes in the benefits of medical marijuana. But policymakers struggled with how to limit abuse. So, unlike any other drug prescribed by doctors, patients were asked to cultivate their own. At this point, however, many find that unworkable. Meanwhile, MPD is tasked with enforcing the current law on the books, not one in discussions in Honolulu. And everything is happening under the umbrella of federal prohibition. Some patients bypass the law and self-medicate illegally, while others endure without until another, legal alternative becomes available. Democracy may not be a spectator sport. But, until the rulebook changes, penalties in this game may include pain, distress, jail time and possibly worse. MTW


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18

DECEMBER 18, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


ONO KINEGRINDS

BY JEN RUSSO JEN@MAUITIME.COM

On a roll Unisan is more than just sushi n unassuming restaurant tucked into the corner of Vineyard and Church streets in Wailuku, Unisan is worth seeking out. The dynamic team of Chef Sam Sohn and wife Sheila, who runs the front of the house, create something special. Chef Sam’s creativity and unique take on

A

Unisan 2102 W. Vineyard St., Wailuku 244-4500

Asian and local cuisine shine throughout the menu, while Sheila offers a warm welcome at the door. You may remember them from past Taste of Lahaina events where they set up award-winning booths and tasting menus in 2004 and 2005. Now, Unisan has become a little hub of nightlife activity in upper Wailuku—a rarity—with regular entertainment. But mostly it’s a cozy place to get your sushi fix.

I was pleasantly surprised to hear from Sheila that Unisan is doing a $10 all-you-can-eat lunch buffet. Not only does it get me out of the office for lunch, but they provide a tasty spread for a great price and I get to support a mom and pop restaurant. I headed there with my colleagues for lunch on a rainy day; my three-year-old daughter happened to be out of school and came along, too. Happily, the under-five crew eat free at the buffet with a paying adult, while Kids 6-12 eat for $5.95. The welcome mat is definitely rolled out for families here. The buffet offers the perfect amount of food without being overkill. I started with salads and fried rice, then moved on to the noodle dishes like chow fun and the entrees like beef stirfry, sweet and sour spare ribs and hamburger steak. They also have a daily dessert. Everything was delicious but I especially loved the spare ribs and their vegetable tempura. The dishes change daily so you can come often and never get tired of the same ol’ thing.

There are also several different sushi rolls available at the buffet: California roll, spicy ahi, cucumber, tamago—a great selection. This buffet selection also changes daily. Their dinner menu is extensive. You can get early bird specials between 56pm and luck out with half off selected food items. If you’re not the early bird type, they have a “late bird” special from 9pm to close. The full menu will amaze you, with yaki niku outdoor lanai grill options, or their shabu shabu like hot pots plus bento combination dinners, steaks, seafoods and all the quintessential local dishes that you have come to know and love—and expect—on-island. I’m a big fan of Korean food so spicy tofu soup and bi bim bap are always

great options. I also can’t resist the honey walnut shrimp. My husband prefers the kal-bi and sushi rolls, and we can’t forget the burgers—basically, they have a little of everything, so no matter what you’re craving, they’ll most likely be able to accommodate you. Their sushi menu has over 40 special rolls, featuring creations like Sam I Am rolled in soybean paper, and the Sam Super California roll with scallops added to the mix. You can even order steak and lobster for only $26.95. The restaurant has lots of seating options: you can sit at the sushi bar or dine at a table. The open-air lanai area is great for their barbecue meals. For late night entertainment including almost nightly live music and karaoke, there’s a bar and dance floor and great drink specials, or their extensive cocktail menu. They can pretty much mix anything behind the bar, or, of course, serve up the hot sake. Parking’s a cinch, with a lot in the back of the restaurant. It may be unassuming from the exterior, but once inside, whatever the desired food or mood, Unisan’s got it wrapped up. MTW

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20

DECEMBER 18, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


TAKEFIVE

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

Alternate holiday feasts PITA PARADISE Kihei Don’t worry, this isn’t one of those Grinchly, “how to avoid the holidays altogether because they’re just an orgy of consumption and gluttony” pieces. Sure, there’s plenty to get cranky about this time of year, but there’s also a lot to love—like the emphasis on eating. How often are you presented with a ready-made, airtight three-month-long excuse to stuff your face? But turkey and trimmings, good as they are, only go so far. Why not expand your seasonal culinary options? A great starting point is this South Maui joint, which serves fresh, tasty Mediterranean fare. Correct me if I’m wrong, but they also may be the only place on-island to get a gyro.

SANSEI Kihei & Kapalua Probably no food (other than, I guess, raw broccoli and room temp tap water) deviates further from the gravysoaked heaviness of the traditional holiday meal than sushi. Maui is home to a number of fine options, but you’ll find few lists that don’t put Sansei at or near the top. And if your Yuletide companion doesn’t roll with the roll, they offer pasta, pork chops and some dangerously delicious desserts.

FLATBREAD Paia I’ve had several people engage me in the “is flatbread really pizza?” debate. You know what? I don’t care. What I do care about is that this place dishes some seriously tasty whatever-you-want-to-call-ems. Order a few 16-inchers and have them served with half-and-half toppings to get the most out of the menu’s palate-pleasing array of combinations. (Two personal favorites that go well together: the kalua pork and the “coevolution,” which features Kalamata olives, onions, rosemary, garlic, red peppers, mozzarella and goat cheese…I’m hungry.) Plus, the big stone oven’s always got a fire blazing to lend that subtle touch of holiday charm.

BEACH BUM’S Ma’alaea Meat is central to any good holiday feast, and that’s what they’ve got at Beach Bum’s. Steak, chicken, pulled pork, Spam—you name it, all served fresh from the impressive industrial strength smoker they’ve installed out back. Their sides—slaw, baked beans, potato mac salad—are also noteworthy, as is the made-on-site BBQ sauce that comes in sweet and spicy and makes everything taste better.

Thursday, December 25th - Special Hours

Breakfast & Lunch 7:30am-12:00pm • Dinner 1:00 - 9:00pm Full Breakfast Menu; Limited Dinner Menu

Appetizers Crispy Crabcakes ~ 14 Lump crab, lightly bound and breaded with cornflakes and served with tangy remoulade sauce Shrimp Cocktail ~ 11 Six large large poached shrimp served with spicy cocktail sauce Fresh Opah Lettuce Cups ~ 14 Fresh opah in soy glaze with shredded cabbage, crispy bean threads, black bean vinaigrette topped with cilantro and served in butter lettuce cups Homemade Hummus ~ 9 A smooth chick-pea spread with a hint of lemon, tahini, and garlic and served with a toasted pita

Entrées Traditional Turkey Dinner ~ 24 Oven roasted turkey Dinner with mashed potatoes, homemade stuffing, gravy, vegetables, and cranberries Honey Glazed Bone in Ham ~ 26 Served with candied yams, string beans and pineapple chutney Prime Rib ~ 28 Served with mashed potatoes, au jus, horseradish and vegetables Surf and Turf ~ 36 Our prime rib dinner served with grilled shrimp Crab Stuffed Mahi Mahi ~ 36 With a citrus beurre blanc mashed potato potatoes and wilted spinach Fresh Fish of the Day ~ 30 Pan seared with a lemon-caper butter sauce, rice pilaf and vegetables Yellow Curry An array of mixed vegetables sauteed in spicy yellow coconut sauce served over white rice with Tofu ~ 18 • with Chicken ~ 19 • with Shrimp ~ 23

Where people & food of good taste come together! NORMAL HOURS - Open Daily: 7:30am - 11pm • Dinner Served 5pm - 10pm • Full Bar

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DA KITCHEN Kahului & Kihei We’ve told you before and we’ll tell you again. Big. Huge. Gigantic. Portions. What more do you need to know? If you’re looking to feed a small holiday army and don’t feel like doing dishes ‘til Groundhog Day, head to Maui’s signature local eatery and grind until your belly’s like Santa’s. Ho ho ho. MTW

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

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Join the fun and dress as your favorite Rock Star!

$100 1st Place • $50 2nd Place • $25 3rd Place RING IN THE NEW YEAR WITH PARTY FAVORS & CHAMPAGNE TOAST AT MIDNIGHT! DJ MARKY B spinning tunes 9pm-Close. $10 Cover w/ portion going to World Hunger

6:30–8:30PM ON SUNSET PATIO SET • NO COVER 10PM–MIDNIGHT INSIDE ON STAGE • $5 COVER

900 FRONT ST., LAHAINA • MAUI, HAWAII • 667-7400

CHRISTMAS D AY FEAST Thursday, December 25th BRUNCH BUFFET

8:00am, 10:30am, and 1:00pm seatings $28.95 • Children 5-12 years $13.95 • 4 & under free Slow Roasted Prime Rib of Beef Grilled Mahimahi • Roast Turkey with Stuffing Smoked Pit Ham • Portugese Sausage • Smoked Bacon Kama‘aina Eggs Benedict • Scrambled Omelette • Belgian Waffles Buttermilk Pancakes • Seasoned Home Fries • Oysters • Poke Shrimp Cocktail • Coconut Grill Salad Bar • Assorted Desserts

DINNER BUFFET

4:00pm and 7:00pm seatings $31.95 • Children 5-12 years $14.95 • 4 & under free Slow Roasted Prime Rib of Beef • Grilled Mahimahi Roast Turkey with Stuffing • Smoked Pit Ham Tiger Shrimp & Clam Scampi • Paniolo Barbeque Pork Ribs Oysters • Poke • Coconut Grill Salad Bar • Assorted Desserts

Reservations Required: 871-8881 Located at the Maui Seaside Hotel

22

DECEMBER 18, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


MUSICSCENE

BY KATE BRADSHAW KATE@MAUITIME.COM

‘Storm’ on the horizon Brad Watanabe has reggae roots, experimental wings orn and raised on Oahu, songwriter and performer Brad Watanabe (aka BW) is one of those fortunate individuals for which music has become life. Just 23, Watanabe—tall, thin and unassuming despite his rockstar style— has been playing keyboard for the Oahu-based reggae band Ooklah the Moc for five years. In the past year

B

Also not lost despite big label status are Watanabe’s fiercely wistful and ponderous lyrics; love and freedom are merely the tip of the iceberg. We caught up with Watanabe just ahead of his Maui performance with Ooklah the Moc. The band is celebrating the release of Vault, which hit the shelves earlier this year. On Maui they’ll be performing their latest, as well as a few of BW’s tunes.

BW Next gig: Friday, Dec. 19, 10pm at Casanova 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao, 572-0220 New album: Through the Storm Web site: myspace.com/ninjafire808

he has released two full-length recordings. He caught the eye of Icon Records, which put out his most recent effort, Through the Storm. While Watanabe stays close to his reggae roots—especially by collaborating with Ooklah, Paula Fuga and Next Generation on a few tunes—he breaks formula on a few tracks, namely “Qualify,” on which he layers a string arrangement. The tracks on Storm are more heavily produced than those on his other record, Upflow. Because of this, they sound a tinge less organic, but Watanabe maintains his thoughtful yet mellow island style.

What made you choose the title Through the Storm for your latest release? [The album] is about getting through rough times in life, whether problems in love or struggles with everyday things. Life’s not that easy, and I feel that these are songs of hope and strength.

What made you choose reggae as the primary vehicle for your music? I’ve loved reggae from the first time I heard it. It’s so catchy and it just makes you want to move to it. Living in Hawaii, reggae has a huge influence so I think it was natural for me to want to play it and write songs in that style. As much as I love reggae though, I am influenced by a lot of different styles of music and I think it comes out in what I write.

I read that you got started playing at around age three. What instruments? Yes, at the age of 3 I started taking ukulele lessons and at 5 I started piano lessons. My parents were really supportive of my music and got me lessons and instruments from a young age. After that, I taught myself guitar and bass and started jamming with a few friends and in a few different bands.

What made you decide to include string arrangements for part of Through the Storm? I think that’s the song Qualify that you’re talking about? I originally had no idea how I was going to record that song because it was so different from anything I’ve written. I just started with my guitar and vocals and added what seemed to fit. Kirk really helped with this one too, suggesting different parts I could add on. It might have been his idea to add the strings.

I noticed a few references to birds on Storm. Was this something you consciously weaved into the record? Well, I like the idea of a bird flying free or a bird perching on a tree. It reminds me of being free, the way we were supposed to live, not trapped in a cage like most people end up being.

This is your first release on Icon Records, which is a pretty big label. How did that come about? Yeah, I’m really thankful that Icon picked me up for this album; I guess they liked the music I’ve put out in the past and wanted to work with me on this one. It was a good fit for this album, working with Kirk Thompson of Kalapana, because I wanted to branch out with a different musical style and he really got me playing outside my norm.

You probably get this all the time, but what’s the story behind the band name Ooklah the Moc? Well my bandmates came up with that one way before I was in the band, but it’s a cartoon character from Thundarr the Barbarian. I’ve never really seen it so I cant say much. MTW

What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of being on a bigger label? Did you have to alter your approach to songwriting? Not too much, I chose all the songs for this album and did most of the arrangements. I like being on a label where I can focus on the music and have someone else handling the business. I guess everyone’s record deal is different depending on the artist and the label, so it’s kinda hard to say. But I’m happy with the way things are going so far.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

23


MINDCANDY

BY KATE BRADSHAW KATE@MAUITIME.COM

The great decline Works that chart humanity’s devolution IDIOCRACY Writer/director Mike Judge is best known for Beavis and Butthead and Office Space. Yet Idiocracy remains a hidden gem in Judge’s body of work, probably because it’s a brutally blunt satire that targets thoughtless consumerism and shallow advertising. The premise: An Army bureaucrat and a hooker agree to be frozen as part of some experiment, which loses funding. The cryogenic capsules in which they are preserved get forgotten in a gigantic garbage heap for 500 years. During that time, humanity degrades into a mass of mindless consumers addicted to fast food and reality shows about groin injuries. The president is a professional wrestler/porn star. Water fountains spout out a sports drink (which is also what they water the crops with because “it’s what plants crave”). Starbucks is a brothel. The protagonist wakes up as the smartest man alive and is thus enlisted to solve all of humanity’s problems. Judge’s portrayal of society 500 years hence is a grotesque caricature, with people eating mass processed junk out of giant buckets and gawking, slack-jawed at the sites of crashes and explosions; but it’s also not too far off the mark.

GALAPAGOS

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658 Front St. • Wharf Cinema Ctr., Lower Level • MulligansAtTheWharf.com

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

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Kurt Vonnegut I picked this book up despite the criticisms I’d read. I mean, hell, it’s Vonnegut. Vonnegut’s take on human evolution contrasts that of Judge. Here, humans’ big brains are the problem. We think too damn much and get ourselves into everything from petty worries to ceaseless, pointless warfare. It’s in the midst of a combination of war/famine that a handful of people end up on a ship bound for the Galapagos Islands. Prior to departure, the ship is stripped of all food and tools. All that’s left is the Mandarax, a machine programmed to translate languages and spit out bits of the collective human knowledge. The Mandarax becomes essentially useless when they finally reach the islands, which are barren and lacking in food sources beyond birds and fish. They manage to survive and propagate the species despite this. Humanity goes the way of the dodo, except for this handful of people. The narrator describes how, over a million years, humans become something completely different in response to the harsh environment: no egos, tiny brains, flippers instead of arms, etc. Not that I’m quite ready to give up my brain, but Vonnegut sure knows how to make one question the very definition of progress.

“TROUBLE EVERY DAY” Frank Zappa This tune doesn’t chronicle humanity’s descent into a thoughtless mob state. For Zappa, we’re already there. Rather this tune, off the 1966 album Freak Out, calls out a number of society’s most troubling aspects: racism, class warfare and sensational news media. The tune was obviously inspired by the Watts riots of 1965 and the news coverage they spawned: “Wednesday I watched the riot/Seen the cops out on the street/Watched ‘em throwin’ rocks and stuff/And chokin’ in the heat.” Nearly anyone—anyone who thinks, at least— can appreciate the way Zappa slams the mainstream news media for insisting on being on the scene of every tragedy as they compete with other networks for viewers (or, more accurately, to deliver eyeballs to advertisers): “If anybody gets the news before it hits that street/they say that no one blabs it faster; their coverage can’t be beat/and if another woman driver gets machine gunned from her seat/They’ll send some joker with a brownie and we’ll see it all complete.” The tune is kind of a talkin’ blues that’s absolutely packed with some seriously scathing lyrics about how stupid humans can be when you stick them in groups. You can listen to it for free at songza.com. MTW


FILMFESTIVAL

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

Frost/Nixon (right); The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (below); Bolt (bottom)

First Light Catch some Oscar bait at the Castle Theater THURSDAY, DEC 18

SATURDAY, DEC 20

5pm Wendy and Lucy (R/80 min.) A woman (that’d be Wendy, played by Michelle Williams) drives to Alaska with her dog (that’d be Lucy, played by a dog) to work at a fish cannery (which she decided would stink less than the alternative, Sarah Palin’s office). Touching, quirky lessons are learned along the way.

Part 1, 2pm; part 2, 5pm Che (NR/part 1, 132 min.; part 2, 131 min.) Director Steven Soderberg dramatizes the life of the famed Argentine revolutionary, played, in a brilliant bit of casting, by the smoldering Benicio Del Toro. Plus—and for an American filmmaker this takes cajones—the four-hour biopic is shot in the native tongue of its central figure, subtitlephobes be damned.

7:30pm Happy-Go-Lucky (R/118 min.) A grade school teacher named Poppy gets her bike stolen and takes driving lessons from a dude named Scott. One is a caustic cynic and the other an eternal optimist (no points for guessing who’s who). Other colorful characters who test our heroin’s unflappability include a flamenco instructor, a homeless guy, a pregnant sister and the class bully.

7:30pm Australia (PG13/150 min.) A big sweeping epic about cattle rustling and other rugged pursuits in the land Down Under, starring Nicole Kidman and High Jackman (both of whom were probably super stoked to get to use their real accents for once). Baz Luhrmann directs, so trippy visuals and out-of-left field musical numbers are a given.

FRIDAY, DEC 19

2pm Bolt (PG/95 min.) The latest animated romp from Disney (not to be confused with its Pixar arm) follows the exploits of a delusional TV superhero dog (voice of John Travolta) whose real world bark doesn’t have as much bite as he thought. As with the best cartoon features it’s got simple lessons and site gags for the kiddies and a few winks for the grownups.

2pm The Secret Life of Bees (PG13/110 min.) Based on an Oprah’s Book Club-esque bestseller, this heartstring plucking drama follows a little white girl named Lily (yeah, we’re not dealing with subtlety here) who moves in with a group of sassy, wise beekeeping sisters in 1960s South Carolina. 5pm Good (NR/96 min.) Viggo Mortensen ditches his Lord of the Rings armor to play an unassuming German professor who gets caught up in a complex political storm involving euthanasia and other life and death matters. 7:30pm What Just Happened? (R/104 min.) Robert DeNiro stars in a comedy in which he plays neither a neurotic mobster nor an overprotective ex-CIA father. Rather, the old Raging Bull gets tamed as a middle-aged Hollywood executive dealing with the myriad stresses of La La Land.

SUNDAY, DEC 21

5pm The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (PG13/165 min.) Based on a short story by F. Scott Fitzgerald, director David Fincher’s (Seven, Fight Club) latest mind-bender tells the tale of a man (Brad Pitt) whose life unfolds backwards; he’s born old and gets progressively younger as the years go by. A romance with a woman who ages in the normal fashion (Cate Blanchett) hits unavoidable snags.

TUESDAY, DEC 23

a vampire. Unlike its American counterpart, this acclaimed Swedish import is unafraid to follow its premise to the logical extremes of brutality and tenderness. In Swedish with English subtitles.

MONDAY, DEC 22 5pm What Doesn’t Kill You (R/100 min.) A tight-knit crew of South Bawstawn buddies (Mark Ruffalo, Ethan Hawke and, as mandated by Hollywood law, one of the Wahlberg brothers) deals with life on the mean streets, getting caught up in drugs, organized crime and a heist gone wrong. We’ve been here before, but writer/director Brian Goodman is drawing from his own life story, so the source at least is pure. 7:30pm The Reader (R/140 min.) A passionate, sordid affair between a scarlet fever-ridden teenager and a kind older woman in post WWII Germany is the starting point for a decades-spanning drama involving Nazi war crimes. So yeah, not a comedy. Kate Winslet and Ralph Fiennes star.

5pm Defiance (R/136 min.) Daniel Craig does the cold-eyed vengeance thing he perfected in the most recent James Bond film—but with a much more serious twist—in this based-on-atrue-story tale of three Jewish brothers who take up arms against the Nazis in Eastern Europe, circa 1940. 7:30pm Frost/Nixon (R/122 min.) A cunning interviewer on the rise and a disgraced former president in freefall face off in director Ron Howard’s adaptation of the Tony award-winning play. The same actors who tackled the title characters on stage (Michael Sheen and Frank Langella) reprise their roles here, and the result is probably about as riveting as two guys sitting in chairs talking can get. A must-see both for those who were shaped by Watergate and, maybe even more so, those who missed it.

DECEMBER 24 & 25 NO FILMS Tickets: $8-$12; Four-film pass: $40. Festival runs through Jan. 3. For more info visit www.mauifilmfestival.com or call 572-3456. All films screen at the Castle Theater, located at the Maui Arts & Cultural Center, One Cameron Way, Kahului. MTW

8pm Let the Right One In (R/114 min.) Like this year’s big teenie bopper hit Twilight, Let the Right One In focuses on a relationship between two misunderstood young people, one of whom happens to be

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

25


FILMCRITIQUE

BY BARRY WURST II BARRY@MAUITIME.COM

Down to ‘Earth’ Sci-fi remake marred by eco preachiness his watchable, initially promising remake of the classic original isn’t a disaster, but, at best, it’s an interesting failure. Keanu Reeves stars as Klaatu, an alien in human guise who comes to Earth to warn mankind about the error of its ways and connects emotionally with a

T

The Day the Earth Stood Still

★★★ ★★★ Rated PG13/110 min.

widowed mother (Jennifer Connelly) and her son (Jaden Smith). The 1951 original was about the need for humankind to reconsider the use of nuclear weapons; this one, in not-sosubtle ways, is about how badly humans have treated the planet—and

that’s the biggest problem with the movie. Imagine Independence Day without Will Smith, crossed with an Earth Day special. Hollywood has been pushing ecoissues hard…too hard. Environmental concerns are tremendously important but, here, as in other recent films, they’re presented in a laughably heavy-handed fashion. There has to be a better way to highlight these urgent eco concerns than having a character lecture the audience. Even worse, the movie doesn’t tell us how we could save our planet (couldn’t Klaatu at least suggest recycling?). The original Klaatu was a pre-cursor for the peace-loving, counterculture movement that was about to take place. Here, he’s like an intergalactic Al Gore. Filmgoers frequently knock Reeves for giving stiff performances and complain that he can’t act. Actually, despite some unfortunate choices, he can act and, in a handful of films, displays genuine depth, fearlessness and charisma. The problem is, Reeves has given great performances both comedic and dra-

The Maui Film Festival’s

10th Annual

FIRSTLIGHT 2008-09 Dec. 17th — Jan. 3rd

See for Yourself. MauiFilmFestival.com 26

DECEMBER 18, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

matic in movies no one saw, while some of his most awkward performances were in widely seen hits. Sci-fi is the genre that has made Reeves famous but, unfortunately, his latest film is more like Johnny Mnemonic than The Matrix. Gort, the silent, towering, one-eyed, laser beam-shooting robot from the original is back and is still an awesome sci-fi icon and the special effects are always great. Connelly is solid as always, but having her and Kathy Bates, both Oscar winners, share the screen without being given much to do is a missed opportunity. Smith has a strong scene in a cemetery but otherwise gives a typical wide-eyed, cute kid performance that is not in the same league as his work in The Pursuit of Happyness. The story follows the outline of the original for a while, until it gets bogged down in explosions interrupted only by Klaatu describing the inconvenient truths plaguing our planet. Non-fans of the original may not mind, while those who rightfully consid-

Klaatu barada nikto, dude. er the Robert Wise film to be a sci-fi classic will be angered and puzzled by what they see. The fault lies neither with Reeves, who gives his role a good shot, nor the director, Scott Derrickson. The blame goes to the preachy, half-baked screenplay. Even Ferngully: The Last Rainforest is a superior melding of message and fantasy. MTW


MOVIECAPSULES First Light Film Festival See Write-ups, page 25

New This Week SEVEN POUNDS - PG13 - Drama - A penitent dude (Will Smith) wants nothing more than to redeem himself. As a result he embarks on a mission to impact the lives of seven individuals. So it’s kind of like that other movie with “seven” in its title, except not. 118 min. THE TALE OF DESPEREAUX - G Animation - A mouse and rat defy convention, first by talking, then by bravely attempting to rescue a princess who is, of course, in deep distress. 94 min.

BY KATE BRADSHAW CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

DELGO - PG - Animation - A young misfit and his unlikely friends must do all they can to keep their world from falling apart in the face of a war between the Lockni and Nohrin peoples. 107 min. FOUR CHRISTMASES - PG13 - Comedy Holy poo! A romantic comedy involving Christmas? Am I dreaming? Plot as follows: An un-married couple (Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon) slogs through Christmas day visiting each of their four divorced (and presumably bitter) parents. 88 min. MADAGASCAR: ESCAPE 2 AFRICA - G Animation - After a series of mishaps a group of animals with famous people voices finds themselves in the heart of the motherland. 89 min. NOBEL SON - R - Comedy - The son of a philandering Nobel Prize winner is kidnapped and held for a $2 million ransom, which said dad refuses to pay. 102 min.

YES MAN - PG13 - Comedy - Jim Carrey stars as a dude who buys into one of those self help fads. The one in question has him saying “yes” to everything that comes his way. Does he wind up on a meth bender in Mexico? You’ll have to watch. 108 min.

NOTHING LIKE THE HOLIDAYS - PG13 Comedy - Well, it depends on what you mean by “no” and “thing.” In any case, this film is about a Puerto Rican family living in Chicago that is undergoing what may be their last Christmas together. Any flick with a giant robot gets my vote. 99 min.

Now Showing

PUNISHER WAR ZONE - R - Action - The comic book character-based hero continues to kick ass in the sequel to the movie, apparently made a few years ago, which which it shares its characters as well as, probably, its plot. 103 min.

AUSTRALIA - PG13 - Drama - A dainty aristocrat reluctantly pairs up with a tough Aussie cowboy dude in an attempt to keep cattle barons from taking over the huge chunk of land she just inherited. Takes place during WWII. 165 min.

QUANTUM OF SOLACE - R - Action - On the heels of his latest explosion-filled fiasco Bond finds himself trying to stop some dude

SHOWTIMES Front Street Theater 900 Front Street, Lahaina, 249-2222 (Matinees: M-F until 6:30pm, Sa-Su until 3:30pm, Discount Tue), Australia - PG13 - Th 5, 8:30. F 4. Sa-W 12:45, 4. Cadillac Records - R - Th-W 7:30, 10 The Day the Earth Stood Still - PG13 - Th 4:30, 7, 9:30. F 4:15, 6:45, 9:15. Sa-W 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15. Quantum of Solace - R - Th 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. F 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. Su-W 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. Seven Pounds - PG13 - F-W 1:30, 4:15, 7, 9:45. Tu 4:15, 7, 9:45. The Tale of Despereaux - G - F-Tu 1:45, 4:15, 6:30, 9. Sa-Su 11:15, 1:45, 4:15, 6:30, 9. W 1:45. 4:15, 6:30. Transporter 3 - PG13 - 4:15, 6:45, 9:15 Yes Man - PG13 - F-Tu 11:30, 2, 4:30, 7, 9:30. Sa-Su 2, 4:30, 7, 9:30. W 2, 4:30, 7.

Ka’ahumanu 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 8754910 (Matinees: everyday until 4pm), Call theater for show times.

Kukui Mall 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 ( Matinees: everyday until 4pm), The Day the Earth Stood Still - PG13 - Th 1, 3:20, 5:40, 8. F-Sa 11, 1:20, 3:40, 6, 8:20, 10:40. M 11, 1:20, 3:40, 6, 8:20. M-W 1, 3:20, 5:40, 8. Four Christmases - PG13 - Th 1:05, 3:10, 5:15, 7:20. F-Sa 11:05, 1:10, 3:10, 3:10, 5:15, 7:20, 9:25. Su 11:05, 1:10, 3:10, 3:10, 5:15, 7:20. MW 1:10, 3:10, 3:10, 5:15, 7:20, 9:25. Twilight - PG13 - Th 2:30, 5:10, 7:50. F-W 1:40, 6:45. Yes Man - PG13 - F-Sa 11:05, 1:25, 3:45, 6:05, 8:25, 10:45. Su 11:05, 1:25, 3:45, 6:05, 8:25. MW 1:05, 3:25, 5:45, 8:05.

Maui Mall Megaplex Maui Mall, 249-2222 (Matinees: M-Th until 6pm, F-Su until 3:30pm), Australia - PG13 - Th 1:30, 2, 5, 5:30, 8:30, 9. F-Tu 1, 1:30, 4:30, 5, 8, 8:30. F-Tu 2:05, 4:25. W 1, 1:30, 4:30, 5. Bolt - G - Th-T 1:35, 4, 6:25, 8:50; 3D 2:05, 4:35 W 1:35, 4, 6:25; 3D 2:05, 4:35. Cadillac Records - R - Th 1:50, 4:25, 7, 9:35. FTu 1:40, 4:15, 6:50, 9:25. W 1:40, 4:15, 6:50. Delgo - PG - Th 2:15, 4:30, 6:45, 9. F-Tu 12, 2:15, 4:30, 6:45, 9. W 12, 2:15, 4:30, 6:45. Four Christmases - PG13 - Th-W 2:20, 2:50, 4:35, 5:05, 6:50, 7:20, 9:05, 9:35 Nobel Son - R - Th only 1:45, 4:20, 6:55, 9:30 Punisher War Zone - R - Th 1:30, 2:15, 4:05, 4:50, 6:40, 7:25, 9:15, 10. F-Tu 6:40, 9:15. F-Tu 1:40, 4:15, 6:50, 9:25. W 6:40. Quantum of Solace - R - Th 2:20, 4:50, 7:30, 10. F-Tu 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15. W 1:45, 4:15, 6:45.

DJ Jazzy Jeff? How’d you get this number? BOLT - G - Animation - A computer-animated dog that stars in a television show leaves his sheltered surroundings when he thinks his owner is lost. Lessons in humility ensue. 96 min.

from taking control over a key America’s water supply. More bly blow up, more martinis shaken and more hot babes nailed. 106 min.

CADILLAC RECORDS - R - Drama Beyonce Knowles as Etta James? Mos Def as Chuck Berr y? Cedric the Entertainer as Willie Dixon? This flick chronicles the lives of some of the most influential musicians ever, all of whom recorded with legendary Chicago-based label Chess records. 109 min.

TRANSPORTER 3 - PG13 - Action Hmmm. Didn’t know there was a Transporter or a Transporter 2. This involves the transportation of an important item at the behest of a criminal mastermind. Explosions ensue. 100 min.

THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL PG13 - Sci-Fi - Keanu Reeves stars in this remake of the 1951 flick about an alien and his giant robot pal who go gallivanting around planet earth. Any flick with a giant robot gets my vote. 103 min.

part of South things probaprobably get probably get

TWILIGHT - PG13 - Fantasy - A shy, awkward teenage human female moves to a new town and discovers her mega-hot sexytime boy crush has a secret. A secret that involves being a vampire. Could be worse. Trust me. 122 min.

The Tale of Despereaux - G - F-Tu 12, 2:20, 4:40, 7, 9:20. W 12, 2:20, 4:40, 7. Yes Man - PG13 - F 1:30, 2, 4, 4:30, 6:30, 7, 9, 9:30. F-Su 1:30, 2, 4, 4:30, 6:30, 7, 9, 9:30. W 1:30, 2, 4, 4:30, 6:30, 7.

Wharf Cinema Center 658 Front Street, 249-2222 (Matinees: Tue all shows, until 6pm every other day), Delgo - PG - 2, 4:30 Four Christmases - PG13 - 11:15, 1:45, 4:15, 6:30, 9 Punisher War Zone - R - 7, 9:30 Twilight - PG13 - 1:30, 4, 6:45, 9:30

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

27


THIS WEEK’S PICKS Speak your mind

All ages? On Maui?

Friday (Dec. 19), 2pm, Council Chambers, Wailuku

Friday (Dec. 19), 7:30pm, Café Marc Aurel, Wailuku

On the surface the question of whether or not Dowling should expand Makena Resort and turn the area mauka of Big Beach into a luxury second-home community seems like a rock-and-ahard-place kind of issue. Many people believe that the project will create desperately needed jobs in the face of an economy that gets suckier and suckier by the day. For opponents of the project, a combination of short term and long term factors come into play, including potential loss of vital archaeological and cultural sites, environmental impacts of any development of how “green” a project is, limited affordable and the possibility that infrastructure in the area would not be adequate to handle an influx of people. The project is before the full council, and will be hearing public testimony Friday. We’ve given the issue an ocean of ink and justifiably so since it’s crucial that, regardless of your stance on the issue, you know that there’s another chance to speak your mind. Show up early to sign up for testimony.

I have quite a few memories of being under 21 and thus denied at the door at many an awesome show. “I can fight and die for my country,” my friend Jim said as we walked away from one such juncture when we were both a mere few months shy of the magic age, “but I can’t watch a band play or have a beer.” The arbitrariness of a legal drinking age, especially the one that our law currently dictates, is one thing. But denying people who adore music the right to partake in something inspiring is something that bureaucrats might not have the capacity to question. Of course, all ages venues, which don’t really have much of a presence on Maui, would serve as an antidote to this. Punk band Order of the White Rose has been making an effort to see to it that anyone who wants to see them play should be able to, well, see them play. This is why they’re playing two shows at Café Marc Aurel Saturday night. Those unfortunate enough to be underage can check them out from 7:39pm, but the Liquor Commission requires that anyone who is underage buy food if they do come out. After 9pm it will be 21 and up. Free.

THURSDAY

28

DECEMBER 18, 2008

➤➤➤➤➤ FRIDAY ➤➤➤➤➤ SATURDAY ➤➤➤➤➤ SUN

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


BY KATE BRADSHAW

All the Che

Global vibe

Saturday (Dec. 19), 2pm, Castle Theater, MACC

Sunday (Dec. 20), 10pm, Mulligan’s on the Blue, Wailea

There are pretty much three words that sum up a flick in which Benicio Del Toro is cast as Argentine revolutionary Ernesto “Che” Guevara: Oh, hell yes. While the 2004 flick The Motorcycle Diaries chronicles his travels throughout South America and the epiphanies experienced therein, Che, coming to Maui as part of the Maui Film Festival’s annual FirstLight screening series, focuses on the activist side of this fascinating human being. It starts with Che and Fidel Castro’s eventually successful efforts against the regime of dictator Fulgencio Batista. Due to its epic length (well over four hours!) the film will be screened in two parts. Part one is at 2pm; part two is at 5pm. It’s in Spanish with English subtitles. $12.

DAY

This Sunday evening, as you scramble to get to your car after shakin’ it at Little Beach, your mind may be awash with a number of pressing questions. The first will likely revolve around the location of the clothing you had so zealously shed in the throes of the South Maui heat. The second may address the whereabouts of your vehicle, your friend’s vehicle or the vehicle of someone else who would be willing to give you a ride. The third will presumably explore the possibilities of the near future, namely for that evening. Fortunately, a solution to the third quandary is at hand. It involves a performance by reggae/world music performer Jamallad, whose sound, along with some yummy local beers, may be just the thing you need. Jamallad, an Ivory Coast native, has quite a story: after moving to Maui he suffered a debilitating injury that nearly permanently barred him from performing. He says his recovery was near miraculous and that he could not have done it without an outpouring of help and support from the Maui community. So if you haven’t gotten your dancin’ fill come Sunday, and you have located your clothing (or can at least fake it with a sarong or towel), attending this show would be a worthwhile endeavor.

➤➤➤➤➤MONDAY ➤➤➤➤➤TUESDAY ➤➤➤➤➤WEDNESDAY

In the heart of Olde Makawao Town

WILD WAHINE WEDNESDAY CASANOVA’S FAMOUS

Friday

December 19th

LADIES NIGHT

Ooklah the Moc CD release party with special guest

KOKO

Music Starts at 10:00pm $25 cover

Q103 and the Big Hawaiian present ‘808 dopest djs’

Dj Stylz & DJ Jammin J

THE EVENING THAT EARNED CASANOVA THE AWARDS

“BEST LATE NIGHT IN MAUI” and “BEST SINGLES SCENE IN MAUI” Music Starts at 10:00pm $10 cover Saturday

December 20th

THE MANA’O RADIO CHRISTMAS PARTY with the

MANA‘O RADIO ORCHESTRA Bring a gift, pick a gift and enjoy 20% off your dinner tab SHOW at 10pm $7 Donation

Thursday, Dec. 18th

Saturday, Dec. 20th

HOT LATIN THURSDAYS

DJ BLAST

$2 Bud Light Drafts

Village Station

Friday, Dec. 19th

Shot Specials • $ 3 Cosmopolitans

LATIN DJ DANCING

$2

Drink Specials Bud Light Drafts

Monday, Dec. 22nd

Alternative Night

FIJI

Tuesday, Dec. 23rd

FAT TUESDAYS $3

J Boog

with Kila Kila

“Holla” Drink Specials

Wednesday, Dec. 24th

& Anuhea Drink Specials All Night

Christmas Eve Party

DJ BLAST 80’s & 90’s

Drink Specials All Night

Doors Open at 8:30pm • Reserve The Cellar for your private party or corporate holiday event. Call Keoni at 205-7811.

Make it a memorable evening. Dine and dance at Casanova. For dinner reservations call 572-0220 www.casanovamaui.com

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

29


Big Shows Kelii Kanealii - Fri., Dec. 19. Formerly the Hawaiian half of fusion band Hapa, Kanealii returns to Maui for a rare performance. Gail Swanson opens. $10/$15 door. Mulligan’s on the Blue, Wailea. 874-1131. Ooklah the Moc - Fri., Dec. 19. Legendary Oahu reggae band comes to Maui to celebreate their latest release, Vault. With special Guest Koko. $25. 10 p.m. Casanova, Makawao. 572-0220. Pete Kater - Sat, Dec 20. This piano player/composer has written over 100 tunes for television, film, and off-Broadway productions. He’s also been nominated for four Grammies in the past five years and has gone multiple platinum. $22. 7:30 p.m. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC. 242-7469.

Stage Calling All Readers - Mon-Fri. Want to read for Maui On Stageís Bare Essential Theater? Roles are announced at monthly readings and scripts are given out in advance. Call Kristi. 244-8680 x23. Christmas for Rent - Daily. A Christmas play performed by students and directed by Virginia Sandell. $6 adults/$4 students & seniors. 7:30 p.m. Cafeteria, St. Anthony High School 1518 Lower Main St., Wailuku. 244-4190. Birthday of a King - Daily. This is one of Maui’s biggest Christmas dealies. The show has a cast of over 150 singers, dancers and actors, an award winning-choir and spectacular visuals. $10/$5 keiki. 7-9 p.m. King’s Cathedral, 777 Mokulele Hwy., Kahului. 643-7729.

Tickets on Sale Praise & Worship Concert - Sat, Dec 27. DSP Entertainment presents this show, which includes performances by Dane Patao Jr., Testafiyah and Makamae Auwae. $10/$5 ages 13-17. 5 p.m. Lahaina Civic Center. 877-5331. Home: Inside & Out - Wed, Dec 31. Three young Hawaiian men, each from a different island, will perform a series of vignettes that deal with home, family and cultural identity. Tickets available at MACC box office, by phone and through mauiarts.org. $20/keiki half price. . 7:30 p.m. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC. 242-7469. New Year’s Celebration - Wed, Dec 31. Huge show includes performances by Bill Kreutzmann, Papa Mali, Matt Hubbard, James Hutchinson, Kit Kat Club and P.O.R.T.A.L. Tickets are available at Bounty Music, Wings, Wine Corner, West Side Vibes and by calling 260-0831. $65 before Dec. 25/$88 till show date/$100 day of show. 10 p.m. The Voyage East, Pauwela Cannery, 375 Kuiaha Rd., Haiku. 269-0831. Toadies - Sat, Jan 10. Dubbed by some as grunge rock, these guys got pretty huge in the ‘90s with the bone-chilling song “Possum Kingdom.” $30. 10 p.m. Hard Rock Cafe, Lahaina. 667-7400. Keali’i Reichel/Maui Pops Orchestra - Sat, Jan 17. Singer/guitarist/kumu hula Keali’i Reichel joins a few members of the Maui Pops Orchestra for a show that will benefit Reichel’s Halau Ke’alaokamaile as they prepare for the Merrie Monarch competition. $12/$45/$55/$65/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Shanghai Circus - Daily, Jan 19. The acrobats, jugglers and contortionists return to Maui for a most vibrant, edge of your seat kind of show. Tickets available at MACC box office, online at mauiarts.org or by phone. $10, $18, $23. Mon., 4 & 7 p.m.; Tue. 7 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Jake Shimabukuro - Sat, Jan 24. Wow. This ukulele virtuoso delivers an electrifying performance. The YouTube video featuring his cover of “While My Guitar Gently Weeps” is just the beginning. His talent and his philosophy on playing make for a most captivating show. $12/$28/$37/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469.

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

Leon Fleischer - Sun, Jan 25. This pianist spent years sharpening his skills without the use of his right hand due to a neurological disorder. He later miraculously regained use of his right hand. $12/$30/$40/$45/keiki half price. 5 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Rubberdance Group - Thu, Jan 29. An intriguing blend of hip hop and ballet makes for a unique and entertaining show. Tickets available at MACC box office, by phone, or through Mauiarts.org. $12/$22/$32/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Ozomatli - Fri, Jan 30. This eight-piece Latin fusion group mixes it up with influences ranging from Jamaican reggae to Indian raga. Despite such astonnishing diversity the band never loses is hip shaking edge. Tickets go on sale to general public 12/12 and will be available through the MACC box office, by phone and through Mauiarts.org. $25/$30 day of show. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Da Braddahs - Fri, Feb 6. James Roche and Tony Silva make up this Hawaiian comedy duo. The two bust through a number of characters that you can only really see here in the isles. $25/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC. 242-7469. The Presidents of the United States of America - Fri., Feb. 6. These purveyors of such catchy tunes as “Lump” and “Peaches” are making their way to Maui. Tickets go on sale Dec. 19. $35. Hard Rock, Lahaina. 667-7400. Makana - Sat, Feb 14. Part of the MACC’s Mele Series, Makana will play the slack key and world styles that earned him opening slots for the likes of Santana and Sting. $30/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Mark Morris Dance Group - Thu, Feb 19. Considered by some to be the “bad boy of modern dance,” choreographer Mark Morris brings his eclectic dance performance to Maui. $12/$27/$47/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Angelique Kidjo - Sat, Feb 21. West African singer and composer Kidjo has captivated audiences and won acclaim worldwide for her amazing voice and commanding stage presence. $12/$30/$47/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Hapa - Fri, Feb 27. This slack key and vocal duo, consisting of Barry Flanagan and Nathan Aweau, takes the MACC stage for a rare, can’t-miss performance. Will also feature chant from Charles Kaëupuís and a hula performance by Malia Peterson. $12/$28/$37/keiki half price. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469. Steve Miller Band - Sat, Feb 28. Jokers, smokers and midnight tokers rejoice: Steve Miller Band is coming to Maui. I’ve seen him live before; the man is a machine and so are the musicians with which he surrounds himself. Jungle Love, anyone? $55/$65/$85/$125. 7 p.m. A & B Amphitheater, MACC. 242-7469.

Events THURSDAY, DEC 18 School Band Performance - They’ve practiced and practiced. Now Iao School Band will perform at Center Stage. 6:30-7:30 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Hula Show - Te Tiare Patitifa performs as part of Lahaina Cannery’s Holiday Happenings series. 7 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304. Cinema Night - Cafe Mambo will be hosting an evening of classic and cult classic films for the 21 and older crowd. This week’s flick is A Christmas Story. 9:00 p.m. Cafe Mambo, Paia. 579-8021. Networking Gathering - A chance for aspiring business owners and others to see what kind of connections they can make in order to move ahead. Aspiring business owners meet at 8:30,

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

entrepreneurs at 9:30 and those recently laid off will meet at 10:30. $20. 8:30, 9:30, 10:30. Tasty Crust, Wailuku. 891-8554.

FRIDAY, DEC 19 Shakin’ Keiki - Come see little hula dancers in adorable outfits doing the cultural dance of their ancestors. Free. 3:30 p.m. Lahaina Center, 900 Front St. 667-9216. Maui Cheer Babes Performance - How long’s it been since you’ve seen a human pyramid, anyway? Take a break from Christmas shopping to check this one out. 5:30 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Frosty the Stickman - Performance by said performer. A holiday deal. 6-8 p.m. Whaler’s Village, Kaanapali. Choir Performance - Lahaina Baptist Church performs as part of Lahaina Cannery Mall’s Holiday Happenings series. Free. 7 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304. Sing-It-Yourself Messiah - The audience will serve as a chorus for Maui soloists Debra Lynn, Sarah Oppenheim-Beggs and Robert E. Wills, who will sing the arias and recitatives. Part of Maui Choral Arts Association’s Peace Through Music series. $15/$13/$10. 7 p.m. Hyatt Regency Maui Resort and Spa. 870-5560. Uke Performance - The boys at Kamehameha School will be putting on a killer ukulele show at center stage. 7 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Maui Christmas to You 2 - Alaka’i Paleka, Uluwehi Guerrero and others perform at this once a year deal. $15/$10 seniors and keiki. 7:30 p.m. Iao Theater, Wailuku. 242-6969. Media Salon - Haiku native and successful television producer Destin Daniel Cretton shares a few secrets of the business. A screening of his short film Drakmar: A Vassal’s Journey, which will also screen at Sundance Film Festival, will also take place. $5 suggested donation. 8:30 p.m. Akaku Community Television, 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului. 871-5554.

SATURDAY, DEC 20 Sakada Arrival Ceremony - Event will commemorate the 102nd arrival of Filipino settlers in Hawaii. 10 a.m. Binhi At Ani Center, Kahului. 877-7880. Christmas at Pi’ilani Village - Event includes the arrival of Santa Claus (Tahitian style) and performances by Te Tiare Patitifa, Kihei Charter Middle School Top Hats and Maui Academy of the Performing Arts. 11 a.m. Piilani Village Shopping Center, Kihei. 874-8900. Pam Petersen - Jazz vocalist performs at center stage. 11:30 a.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Swap Meet - I’ve always wanted to unearth some totally awesome treasure at a random flea market. This might be a good place to start. Admission: 50 cents. 7 a.m.-12 p.m. Pu`unene Ave., Kahului. 877-3100. Clothing Drive - Big Brothers & Big Sisters of Maui if asking you to donate your used clothing and small household items in an effort to help disadvantaged youth. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Wal-Mart PStore (next to the automotive center). 242-9754. Keiki Hula Show - Te Tiare Patitifa Keiki Hula performs as part of Lahaina Cannery Mall’s Holiday Happenings series. 1 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304. Santa Claus Pet Photos - Your pets have probably been asking when they can get their picture taken with Santa. Well, here is their chance. All donations given will benefit the Maui Humane Society. 1-3 p.m. Pouchi Couture, 400 Hana Highway, Unit 1, Kahului. 893 2275. Christmas in Paradise - Maui Mall shows some holiday aloha. Performances by Halau Hula O Keola

Ali’iokekai and 501 Soul as well as prize drawings and giveaways. 1-3:30 p.m. Maui Mall. 871-1307. Michael Kollwitz & his Chapman Stick Performance is part of Lahaina Cannery Mall’s Holiday Happenings series. Free. 12 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304. Tuba Christmas - Holy shit. This is the tuba enemble’s 20th annual Christmas performance. 2 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Choir Performace - King His House of Restoration Church will presumably sing Christmas songs. 6 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Ballroom/Latin Dance Charity Benefit Private Image Latin & Ballroom Dance Studio is holding a number of dance lessons/parties to benefit local charities. This week it’s Women Helping Women. $5. 6-10 p.m. Omori Studio A, MACC. 891-8747. Mele Kalikimaka Performance - A chance to celebrate the holidays Hawaii style: by the beach. 78 p.m. Whaler’s Village, Kaanapali.

SUNDAY, DEC 21 Massage Therapy School Open House Becoming a massage therapist is a great way to make friends. Aloha School of Massage Therapy is opening its doors to prospective students today only. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. 355 Hukilike St., Suite 203, Kahului. 871-9966. Clothing Drive - Big Brothers & Big Sisters of Maui if asking you to donate your used clothing and small household items in an effort to help disadvantaged youth. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Wal-Mart PStore (next to the automotive center). 242-9754. Keiki Hula Show - Pau Ala Hula Halau performs as part of Lahaina Cannery Mall’s Holiday Happenings series. Free. 1 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304. Choir Performance - Grace Independent Baptist Church choir performs as part of Lahaina Cannery Mall’s Holiday Happenings series. Free. 12 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 7 p.m. Economic Systems Readers’ Circle - Come discuss what’s been written about the world’s economic systems. Meet at the black tables in front of Queen Kaahumanu Center. 1:30-4 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 573-3250. Memorial Tree Trimming - This event is meant to help bereaved parents through remember lost children. Parents are encouraged to bring personalized ornaments commemorating their lost loved one, but paper ones will also be available. Names of the children will be called during the ceremony. 2 p.m. Wailuku Union Churc, 327 High St., Wailuku. 244-0125. Sunset Drum Circle - Come and drum, dance and shake it on the beach with Omzone. Free. 4:20 p.m. Kamaole Point. 298-9022. Santa Arrives at Kaanapali - Santa Claus diteches the sleigh; opting instead to ride ashore on an outrigger canoe for a special beach appearance. He’ll be taking Christmas requests from keiki and handing out candy canes to visitors. This is Santa’s 14th annual visit to Hula Grill Kaanapali. 4:30 p.m. Hula Grill, Kaanapali. 667-6636. First Light Celebration - A celebration that kicks off Chanukah takes place at the Grand Wailea. The close of the holiday will be held on the eighth night at the Maui Mitzvah Center, 300 Hoohana St., Kahului. $10. 5:30 p.m. The Grand Wailea Resort and Spa. 249-8770. Christmas in Wailuku - Debra Lynn and Jerry Eiting perform their final Iao Theater Christmas performance ever. Features holiday songs of old and new with the island’s most talented singers including Tatiana Bradley, Lauren Clark, Leighanna Edwards, Madeline Rose Hamada, Katie Iannitello, Noelani Neal, and many others. $15/$10 seniors and keiki. 6 p.m. Iao Theater, Wailuku. 242-6969. Dance Performance - Maui Academy of Performing Arts will be at center stage. 7 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369.


The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

AMBROSIA 1913 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 891-1011

CAFE MARC AUREL 28 N. Market St. Wailuku - 244-0852

Thursday 12/18

Friday 12/19

Saturday 12/20

Sunday 12/21

Monday 12/22– Wednesday 12/24

Anuhea No cover, 10pm

Estee Graham No cover, 10pm

Erin Smith No cover, 10pm

Louise & Ortiz No cover, 10pm

MON - Call for details;;TUE - Kahala & Indo of LAWA; WED - Karen B

Hand Jive Jazz Trio

Order of the White Rose

Tom Cherry Band

MON - Open Mic

Ooklah the Moc $25; 10pm

Manao Radio Christmas Party $7, 10pm

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesday w/DJ Styles & DJ Jammin J; $10, 10pm

Hot Latin Thursdays

FIJI/J Boog/Anuhea 9pm

DJ Blast

MON - Village Station (Alternative Night); TUE - Fat Tuesdays

Bringing Sexy Back $10, 10pm

Winter Bash w/ ALLIEZ

Orin & Junior No cover

Dave Carroll No cover

CASANOVA 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

CELLAR 744 744 Front St., Lahaina 661-3744

CHARLEY’S 142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-9668

COOL CAT CAFE Wharf Cinema, Lahaina - 667-0908

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

EHA’S POOL BAR 1234 Lower Main, Wailuku - 242-1177

Eric the Whale Shark No cover

Kanoa No cover, 10pm

Pub Quiz Karaoke

Dave Carroll No cover

Cheryl Rae Band 9pm

GIAN DON’S

Anuhea 9pm

MON - Open Mic MON - Karaoke; TUE - Backyard Jam; WED - Karaoke

Karaoke

Ultra Fab w/ DJ Michael Fong; $5, 10pm

1445 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-4041

WED -Wii Wednesdays w/ DJ Michael Fong, 10pm

HARD ROCK CAFÉ

MON - Marty Dread & the Kryptones, $10, $5 Kama aina

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

ISANA 515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

MON - Erin Smith; TUE - Jazz Night; WED -Howard Ahia, No cover

Rampage 10pm

Gomega

DJ Shaka Rock

Karaoke w/ Melani

Live Music No cover, 9pm

Live Music No cover, 9pm

Live Music No cover, 9pm

Gina Martinelli No cover

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

JACQUES 120 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8844

MON - Kanoa of Gomega, 10pm; TUE - DJ Chrest; WED Crunch Pups/Melani, 10pm

MON-WED - Karaoke

DJ CIA No cover, 9:30pm

Open for Christmas! $15.95 for Prime Rib & Turkey Dinner! both Moose’s locations

Nightly Entertainment at Lahaina Moose’s starting at 9pm!! 844 FRONT ST., LAHAINA • 667-7758

2511 S. KIHEI RD., KIHEI • 891-8600

295 & $395 Tacos • $250 20oz Bud & Bud Light $ 50 4 20oz Margaritas

$

2511 S. KIHEI RD., KIHEI • 891-8600

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

31


Specials are available individually or as a Menu for Two at $75 per person

Crispy Skin Wild Salmon Served over garlic spinach, chive potato puree, with a

chanterelle mushroom and asparagus butter

Appetizers ~ $14 Each

$42

Served with a white bean and roasted scallop casserole

Fresh Maine crab meat in a warm cream cheese fondue, seasoned with horseradish and Sambuca served

finished with winter vegetables

$42

Mango and Pineapple Glazed Ham

Served with shrimp au gratin, scallop potatoes and baby

Fresh Hood River Salmon tar-tar,

Baked Maine Crab Fondue

Roasted Medallions of Tenderloin

in an avocado chipotle relish, lightly seasoned, and served with fried wontons

Salads ~ $13 Each Warm Kula spinach salad Smoked Duck Salad

Bok Choy

Strawberry, papaya, fresh ginger, and baby Kula greens, with yellow tomatoes and a passion orange guava vinaigrette

$29

Includes choice of

Tender greens, lightly wilted, with goat cheese, apple smoked bacon, and oyster mushrooms in balsamic dressing

Entrées ~ $42 Each Pan Seared Cajun NY Strip Pancetta Wrapped Monk Fish

Eggnog Mousse in a Chocolate shell cream Hot Chocolate Molten Pudding with vanilla bean ice Fruity Christmas Pudding with caramel sauce

With baby beets, whipped Yukon gold potatoes and a Tarragon Beurre Blanc

Served with two papaya glazed shrimp in a mango burre blanc, a veal demi glaze and Whipped Yukon gold potatoes and winter vegetables

Pan roasted Sea Bass

With lobster sauce, and fresh slipper tail lobster in a lemon grass Au ‘jus with wild mushroom risotto

Dessert ~ $12 Each Pineapple upside down cake served warm with homemade mango ice cream Molten Lava cake fresh vanilla bean ice cream

Thursday

DJ JAY P NFL FOOTBALL on 2 large screen TV’s in the lounge 32

DECEMBER 18, 2008

Saturday

Friday ROCKIN’ THE TOP 40 MIX starts at 10pm

Sunday

DJ JAY P LIVE MUSIC ON THE GRILLE with Scottie Rotten Scottie Rotten ON THE ROOF

$2 Amstel Lt. Drafts $3 Coors Lt. Bottles $3 Vodka Wells

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

starts at 10pm $2 Amstel Lt. Drafts $3 Coors Lt. Bottles $3 Vodka Wells

AT NOON AND ENDING AT 10pm

Drink Specials start at 8am

Monday

LIVE

ENTERTAINMENT STARTING AT 6:30PM

Tuesday

Live Music by multiple musicians from 3:30pm to 10:30pm

Wednesday WATCH THE HAWAII BOWL ON THE GRILLE Followed by Scottie Rotten & DJ JAY P starting at 10pm


The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

Thursday 12/18

Friday 12/19

Saturday 12/20

Sunday 12/21

Monday 12/22– Wednesday 12/24

Vince Esquire No cover

Kenny Roberts No cover

Way Back Machine No Cover

Kahala No cover

TUE - Da Ha-Y-ans, No cover WED - Chico & Da Kine, No cover

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB 36 Keala Pl., Kihei - 875-7711

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE

DJ Boomshot No cover, 10 p.m.

DJ Shaka Rock No Cover, 10pm

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

KIMOS 845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE STEAKHOUSE

Karaoke

136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

LOS PELONES Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-9900

LULU’S KIHEI 1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

LULU’S LAHAINA Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

Karaoke

Cheryl Rae

Salsa Night $7, 10pm

TUE - IRS

Neto Latin Salsa No cover, 9pm

Shaka Saturdays $10, 10pm

MON - Na Hoku; WED - Way Back Wednesdays, 10pm MON - DJ LX; TUE - Kanoa of Gomega; WED - Salsa Night

Live rock & roll 9pm

Live hip hop/reggae $15, 10pm

DJ $15, 10 pm

DJ Hurricane No cover, 9pm

ADD Twins (retro) 9pm

ADD Twins (hip hop) No cover; 9pm

MAI TAI LOUNGE 839 Front St., Lahaina - 661-5288

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S 844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE

Kelii Kanealii/Gail Swanson

100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

MULLIGAN’S AT THE WHARF Cinema Center, Lahaina - 661-8881

OCEANS BAR & GRILL 1819 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-2414

Wee D’ono No cover, 10pm Karaoke w/Toby 9pm

MONDAY, DEC 22 Hula Show - Halau Hula O Keola Aliiokekai performs as part of Lahaina Cannery Mall’s Holiday Concert series. Free. 7 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304.

TUESDAY, DEC 23 Blood Drive - Interested in saving a life or two, but don’t have the time to get a CPR certification? Give blood. It doesn’t hurt. 7 a.m.-2 p.m. Cameron Center, Wailuku. (800) 372-9966.

WEDNESDAY, DEC 24 Blood Drive - Interested in saving a life or two, but don’t have the time to get a CPR certification? Give blood. It doesn’t hurt. 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Maui Economic Opportunity Family Center, 99 Mahalani St. Kahului. (800) 372-9966.

Ongoing Danceout Thursdays - Thu. Get down to the African beats of Zuni Migoze. $10. 7-10 p.m. Pauwela Cannery, 375 W. Kuiaha, Haiku. 281-3897. Canned Food Drive - Daily. Bring non-perishables for Maui Food Bank, which is in pretty dire need this year, as you can imagine. Upcountry Fine Art, Makawao. 573-6000. Free HIV/Hepatitis C Testing and Counseling - Mon-Fri. Available from the Hawaii Dept. of Health. Free Hepatits A & B Vaccines also available. Times and locations vary around the island. 984-2129. Holiday Book Drive - Daily. Help Maui’s keiki discover how cool books are. Because they are. 9 a.m. Barnes and Noble, Lahaina. 662-1300. Holiday Gift Wrapping - Daily. Avoid papercuts and help out a good cause. Proceeds will go to Habitat for Humanity. Ask about volunteer opportunities. (Times vary.). 10 a.m.-12 p.m. Queen Kaahamanu Center. 877-3360. Iridiology/Rayid - Daily. Clinical herbalist Kimberly Kneier peers into your irises, which are said to be amazing indicators of your state of health. Mini consultations are $20. 2-5 p.m. Dragon’s Den, Makawao. 572-2424. Israeli Folk Dancing - Every Tue & Wed. The public is invited to experience the music and dance of Israel, sponsored by the Jewish Congregation of Maui. $5 suggested donation. Upcountry dance sessions take place at Grace Church in Kula Sundays from 4:30-6 p.m. 6-8 p.m. Beit Shalom Synagogue, 634 Alulike St., Kihei. 280-1051. Non-Profit Polynesian Dance - Tue. Support the kids of the Napili Kai Foundation by watching their Polynesian dance show. $10 adults, $5 kids. 5:30 p.m. 669-6271. Toastmasters - Tue. Perfect your public speaking skills in this community club. 9 a.m., Kapalua Land

Silky Ringo No cover, 10pm

Hazmatt No cover, 10pm

Ekolu 10pm

Co. training center, 665-5485; 6 p.m., St. Theresa Church, Kihei, 298-3966. Ukulele Lessons - Tue. Learn some strumming techniques to impress you friends with. Free. 5:45 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304. Soroptimists of Maui Meeting - Wed. Visitors are welcome at this meeting of business and professional women that’s dedicated to improving the lives of women and girls in our community. 4:30 p.m. Hale Mahaolu Elima Community Hall, Kahului. 264-1775. Biofeedback - Fri. Mary Higgins, QXC/SCIO practitioner, helps you energetically rebalance after living yet another day in a toxin-filled world. Walk-ins only. Sliding scale pricing. 2-5 p.m. Dragon’s Den. 573-2424. Job Club - Fri. Get help preparing resumes, contacting prospective employers and interviewing. Free. 3-5 p.m. Job Connections of Maui. 871-4143. Habitat for Humanity - Sat. Spend a few hours helping a family in need get secure shelter. 9 a.m. Call for details. 893-0334. Hula Classes - Sat. Every Sat. Halau Kawaianuhealehua holds open hula classes for children, teen and adult wahines and kanes. 9 a.m. Maui Waena School. Hula Show - Every Sun & Sat. Get a taste of Hawaiian history and culture. Free. 1 p.m. Maui Mall, Kahului. 877-8952. Line Dancing - Sun. Practice your tush push ya’ll and come on down for some line dancing by the Maui Paniolo Posse. Lessons: 6:30 p.m.; Dancing: 7 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. High Hopes Square Dance Club - Mon. A place for beginners to pick up some steps and seasoned square dancers to show off their moves. Free. 7 p.m. Hannibal Tavares Community Center, Pukalani. 572-0671. Pipe Up - Mon. No experience is needed for drummers and bagpipers at these open, free lesson and practices for the Isle of Maui Pipe Band. 6 p.m. Call for Direction. 876-0154. Senior Line Dancing - Mon. Line dance lessons for people 55 or better. 8:30-10 a.m. Kaunoa Senior Center, Sprecklesville. 270-7313. Maui Singles Investment Club - Tue. This event gives Maui singles a chance to mingle while learning about investments. 5:30-7 p.m. Cary & Eddie’s Hideaway, Kahului. 579-9249. Speed Dating - Tue. Sit down for a round of threeminute dates. Who knows, you could find true love... or at least someone you might want to spend a whole second date with. Registration: $5. 8 p.m. Wow-Wee Maui Kava Bar & Grill, Kahului. 871-1414.

Keiki Winter in Hawaii - Thu. Aubrey Myers of La-TiDa fame hosts a Holiday season singalong for keiki. 10-11 a.m. Makawao Public Library. 573-8785.

An Den $3, 9:30pm

MON - Computer DJ (Rock & roll); TUE - ADD Twins; WED - DJ Hurricane

Jamallad

TUE - Open Mic w/ Rick Glencross

Silky Ringo No cover, 10pm

MON - Dub Boyz, No cover, 10pm; TUE - Unifires, No cover, 10pm; WED - Open Mic, No cover, 10pm

FIJI 10pm

TUE - Karaoke Karaoke w/ Toby; 9pm ; WED - DJ Hypnotize

After-School Help - Mon-Fri. Hui Malama Learning Center offers after-school homework help and classes. Call for directions and hours. 244-5911. Athletic Club Outreach - Every Tue & Thu. Got tough kids? Get them instruction on Olympic weightlifting, power lifting, body building and sports-specific weight training by an experienced team of coaches. Ages 11-19. Free. 4:45-6 p.m. St. Mark Weightlifting Hall, Good Shepherd Episcopal Church, Wailuku. 244-4656. Free Keiki Art Classes - Every Mon, Tue, Wed & Fri. Lahaina Arts Society offers free children’s art classes island wide. MON - Lahaina Surf Hawaiian Housing, 3-5 p.m. & Baha’i Faith Maui Center, Makawao, 9 a.m.-12. TUE - Kehekili Park Terrace, Wailuku, 3-5 p.m. WED - Baha’i Faith Maui Center, 9 a.m.-12 p.m.; Honokowai Kau Hale, 2:30-4:30 p.m.; Ka Hale A Ke Ola, Wailuku, 4-6 p.m. FRI Haiku Boy’s and Girl’s Club, 3-5 p.m. For more info call 661-0111. West Side Storytime - Every Tue & Sat. Lahaina’s newest bookseller is hosting keiki story time, so get them hooked on reading early. Tue., 10 a.m.; Sat., 11 a.m. Barnes and Noble, Lahaina. Keiki Shots - Wed. (Central Maui) Bring children up to the age of 18 without medical insurance in for vaccinations. Bring all immunization records. Walkin basis. Free. 12-3 p.m. Wailuku Health Center. 984-8260. Keiki Issues? - Thu. The Parent Project, a program for parents of strong willed children. Wrestle the phone away from the child and make that call. Free. 6:30-8:30 p.m. Hui Malama Learning Center. 289-5050. Story Time - Thu. Keiki story time and crafts. Free. 10 a.m. Hawaiian Village Coffee, Kahana. 665-1114. Toddler Story Time - Thu. Brush up on the latest in children’s books with your little one. Free. 10 a.m. Makawao Public Library. 573-8785. Yu-Gi-Oh - Sat. Little gamester get out your cards and get ready for a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament! Free. 3 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-4766. Yo Yo Workshop & Demo - Sun. Yo Yo’s are silent, so encourage your kids to learn how to use them and finally get some peace and quiet! Free. 45 p.m. Maui Toy Works. 661-5304. Keiki Chess Club - Mon. For little masterminds age 7-12. Taught by magician Neil Bruce. Free. 2:304 p.m. Makawao Public Library. 573-5313.

Lecture Families With Mental Illness Course - Wed. Course aims to help families of individuals with serious mental illness. Free. 5-7:30 p.m. Cameron Center, Wailuku. 572-3757.

Workshops Be Whale Aware - Thu. Free workshop helps boaters learn how to avoid colliding with whales. 67:30 p.m. Pacific Whale Foundation Discovery Center, Ma’alaea Harbor Shops. 249-8811 ext 1. Living Trust Seminar - Thu. Learn about how a living trust will help your loved ones save money when transferring your estate. 10-11:30 a.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort. (800) 807-3820 ext. 330. Dragon & Tiger Medical Chi Gung - Every Tue Thu & Fri.. This exercise is believed to fight cancer in China. Free class sponsored by the Pacific Cancer Foundation. 3-4 p.m. Maui YMCA.; Tue & Fri. 5:30-6:30 p.m. REPS Fitness Center, Wailea Town Center 243-2999. Cancer Support Group/Relaxation Classes - Fri. Kurt Miyajima will teach cancer patients, survivors, family members and caregivers relaxation and longevity breathing techniques. Free. 3-4 p.m. Maui YMCA. 243-2999.

Environment Conservation in Action Workshop - Thu. The Coral Reef Alliance wants to help individuals, businesses and other outfits apply for grants to fund projects aimed at reef conservation. 5:30-8:30 p.m. Hawaiian Islands Humpback Whale National Marine Sanctuary Education Center, Kihei. 669-9062. Daily Onsite Coral Reef Naturalist Program - Mon-Fri. Learn names of fish youíve seen while snorkeling and how to protect Mauiís reefs at Pacific Whale Foundationís free Coral Reef Information Station. Sponsored by Hawaii Tourism Authority and County of Maui Office of Economic Development. . 8 a.m.-12 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea. 808-294-8811. Kanaha Beach Project - Every Tue & Thu. Join group leader Val Magee in removing invasive species, clearing marine debris and planting native species at Kanaha Park. Bring water, snacks and sunscreen. Wear cool clothing, a hat and good walking shoes—and bring your swimsuit if you wish for a refreshing dip afterwards! Meet at the Canoe Hale at Kanaha Beach Park in Kahului. . 8:30 a.m.-11:30 a.m. Kanaha Beach Park. 808-294-8811 ext. 1. Meet the Aquarist Tours - Daily. Get the inside scoop on the daily lives of MOC aquarists, including turtle and shark feeding. Call to book. $10 plus park admission. 4 p.m. Maui Ocean Center, Ma`alaea. 270-7089. Save Honolua - Tue. Meeting to inform, educate and involve the community on the proposed development of Honolua Bay. 6:45 p.m. Lahaina Civic Center. 870-0052. Smarter than a Sand Crab? - Mon-Fri. Get free info about marine life and answers to all those pesky questions that keep you up all night. The Pacific Whale Foundation Marine Naturalists are definitely

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

33


DA KINE CALENDAR smarter than a fifth grader. The question is, are you?. 8 a.m.-1 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea. 249-8811. The 12 Days of Fishmas - Daily. Kicks off on with a performance from the Pohaikealoha Hula Halau Sunday at noon. Performances by Seabury Hallís 7th and 8th Grade Choir and Band, Lilikoi, Aunty Doll Aricayos and Kupuna ‘O Kihei will follow on December 15th, 20th, 21st, and 23rd respectively. Naturalists will give lectures on animals with holiday-themed names. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Maui Ocean Center, Ma`alaea. 270-7000. Building supplies - Every Wed, Thu, Fri & Sat. Spring cleaning! Donate new and nearly new building materials or purchase them at reduced prices. Volunteers needed to stock, display and price merchandise. Reduce the amount of usable building materials going into the landfill. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Habitat for Humanity, Market St., Wailuiku. 986-8050. Weed and Pot Club - Wed. Did that get your attention? Push up your sleeves and rake, hoe and pull weeds in a beautiful garden setting. Tools, gloves and drinking water provided. Bring sunscreen and tennis shoes. 8:30 a.m. Maui Nui Botanical Gardens, Kahului. 249-2798. Maui Coastal Land Trust Service Project - Fri. The Pacific Whale Foundation’s Volunteering on Vacation program gives you a chance to help save unique ecosystems at Maui Coastal Land Trust in Waihee. Be prepared to help weed out invasive plants or help with other tasks. Get a free t-shirt for your efforts!. 7:45 a.m.-12 p.m. Maui Coastal Land Trust, Waihee. 808-294-8811 ext. 1. Honokowai Valley Restoration - Sat. Visit remote Honokowai Valley, which is closed to public access, with leader Ed Lindsey. Help save archeological sites of old Hawaii, pull invasive plants and possibly plant native species. Get a free t-shirt for your efforts! Sponsored by County of Maui Office of Economic Development and Hawaii Tourism Authority. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Honokowai Valley, West Maui. 808-294-8811 ext. 1. Volunteer on Vacation - Sat. Get to know Maui better by volunteering time to one of many important environmental projects. Meet local experts and learn about the history and environment of the land and get a free t-shirt from the Pacific Whale Foundation!. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Honokowai. 249-8811. Save the Forest - Sun. The Pacific Whale Foundation is hosting a group of ten volunteers to pull invasive pine trees near Hosmers Grove. Transportation is provided. Bring warm clothes, long pants and closed boots. Pick ups: 7:30 a.m., Harbor Shop, 300 Ma`alaea Rd; 8:15 a.m., Upcountry Tavares Community Center. RSVP 856-8341.

Sports/Fitness Billabong Pro - Daily. The deciding event in the women’s Vans Triple Crown surfing series. Call to make sure conditions are conducive (i.e. there are waves). Honolua Bay at Kapalua Resort. 665-1712. Maui Croquet Club - Every Sun, Tue & Thu. You could be an amazing croquet player and not even know it. No mallet? No problem. 2-5 p.m. Waipuilani Park, Kihei. 879-0087. Pool Hours - Daily. Pool Hours - Besides the fear of contracting super-strain ukuís, I really enjoy a good swim in a public pool. Sometimes the thought of dealing with sand is just too much to bear. Kahului, Kihei, Lahaina, War Memorial, Pukalani, anthe Old and New Wailuku Pools: M-W, F, S 9 a.m-4 p.m.; Th 10 a.m.-4:30 p.m.; Sun 12-4:30 p.m. These hours can change due to events. To double check you can call, 270-6135. Group Run - Wed. Stay in shape while taking in some beautiful views! Group meets at Kihei Community Center. Open to runners of all ages and fitness levels. Refreshments will be provided after. Sponsored by Valley Isle Road Runners. Free. 5:30 p.m. Piilani Highway and Lipoa Parkway. Paddling for Breast Cancer Survivors Every Mon & Wed. Get together with other survivors for canoe paddling. Free. 6:45 a.m. Kihei Canoe Club. 243-2999. Tai Chi - Every Mon & Fri. Get your Tai Chi in during your lunchbreak with Dr. Lorrin Pang. Free. noon12:45 p.m. State Building Plaza, Wailuku. 984-8200.

Mahu Maui AIDS Foundation Open House - Sat. Informal gathering featuring wine, pupus, talk story and an office tour. Call for details. MAF Office, 135 Main St., Suite 101, Wailuku. 242-4900, Ext. 226. Volleyball Day - Sat. Bump, set, spike! Free. 1 p.m. Kamaole III Beach Park, Kihei.

34

DECEMBER 18, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

BY KATE BRADSHAW CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

Art “Island Essences” - Daily. The work of Mauibased oil painter Koana Smith will be featured in the Banyan Tree Gallery of Lahaina Arts Society this month. Smith is member of LAS, Hui No’eau, Plein Air Painters of Maui, and Plein Air Painters of Hawaii and paints on location throughout Maui. Her art is also on display at The Coffee Store in Napili. Banyan Tree Gallery, Lahaina. 661-0111. Hui Holidays - Daily. Check out what’s going on at Hui No’eau Visual Arts Center this holiday season. Pick up some killer gifts. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Hui No`eau Visual Arts Center, Makawao. 572-6560 ext. 26. Nomadic Woven Art - Daily. Big Island resident Adam Cayir, of Nomadic Woven Art, is offering an exquisite collection of handmade carpets and textiles for sale, but they also might be worth checking out even if you’re not buying. Smaller gift items such as scarves, pillow covers and other ethnic textiles will also be for sale. Temple of Peace, 575 Haiku Road, Haiku. 345-9771. Art Night - Fri. Stroll through dozens of art galleries in Lahaina Town. Special gallery shows, featured artists-in-action and refreshments. This week’s featured artist is Ronald Macedo. Free. 6:30 p.m. Lahaina. 661-6284. Oil Painting Demonstration - Fri. Maui artist Jack Hamilton show how it’s done. 4-7 p.m. Maui Hands Gallery, Lahaina. 667-9898. He’ui Cultural Arts Festival - Sat & Sun. Huge art and craft fair that showcases locally made goods. Live Hawaiian Music. Good Times. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Banyan Tree Park, Lahaina.667-9194. Art Bistro - Mon. Local artists display their wares, from photography and painting to jewelry and sculptures. Live music, too. 5-10pm. Jacques Northshore Bistro, 120 Hana Hwy. Paia. 808-269-0961. WOW! - Every Wed. Wailea on Wednesdays presents live island music, gallery receptions, artist appearances and more. . 6:30-8 p.m. 897-6770 x2.

Farmers market, Art/Craft Fairs Farmers’ Market and Craft Fair - Every Tue, Wed, Fri & Sat. Great deals on locally grown produce and locally made goods. 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Maui Mall, Kahului. 871-1307. Ho`olokahi Arts & Crafts Fair - Every Tue & Fri. Fresh flower lei-making classes from 9-11 a.m. on Fridays. 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Wailea Beach Marriott Resort south lobby. 879-1922. Ohana Farmers & Crafters Market - Every Tue, Wed & Fri. 8 a.m.-4 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369. Farmers Market of Maui - Every Mon, Wed & Fri. Sample the goods at this local market for fresh produce. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. 61 S. Kihei Rd. Honokowai Farmers Market - Every Mon, Wed & Fri. Lots of fresh local produce plus baked and canned goods. 7-11 a.m. Lower Honopiilani Hwy. Resort Craft Fair - Every Wed & Fri. Hawaiian arts and crafts. 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Renaissance Wailea Beach Resort. Aloha Craft Fair - Fri. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Maui Mall. 872-4320. KBH Craft Fair - Fri. Cultural crafts and live demos. 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Ka`anapali Beach Hotel lobby. 667-5978. Organic Farmers Market - Sat. Fresh produce that’s cheaper than the grocery store. 6:30 a.m.noon. Eddie Tam Memorial Center. Swap Meet Farmers’ Market - Sat. As if that swap meet wasn’t enough of a draw on its own, within its gates also lies a chance to find some great deals on mega-fresh produce. Admission: 50 cents. 7 a.m.-1 p.m. Pu’unene Avenue, Kahului. 877-3100.

Poetry Open Mic - Every night is open mic night at Hawaiian Village Coffee. Kahana Gateway location, call 665-1114. Poetry Slam - Every First Fri. Poets 13 and over are encouraged to share their stuff with the First Friday crowd. Pieces are limited to three minutes. $5. Ha Gallery, Wailuku, 244-3993. Express Yourself - Every Mon. Open Mic Night with music, song, poetry! Free. 7 p.m., Cafe Marc Aurel, Wailuku, 244-0852. Poetry Reading - Every second Tue, read your original work, your favorite poem, or just come to be inspired. Free. 6:30 p.m., Lahaina Public Library, 662-3950.


The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

Thursday 12/18

Friday 12/19

Saturday 12/20

Sunday 12/21

Monday 12/22– Wednesday 12/24

744 Front St., Lahaina - 661-9090

Unifires 10pm

DJ Jay P/A Kettle Prime 10pm

DJ Jay P/Scottie Rotten 10pm

Live Music Until 10pm, No cover

TUE - Live Music, No cover

SANSEI - KAPALUA

Karaoke

Karaoke

Sonny B

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

OYSTER BAR 115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

SANSEI - KIHEI 1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116 -879-0004

SANTA FE CANTINA

MON - DJ Mike;TUE - Ryan from Silky Ringo; WED Orrin & Junior

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7805

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

DJ Slackin No cover, 10pm

DJ Sonny No cover, 10pm

DJ Nexus No cover, 10pm

Crunch Pups No cover, 10pm

FLI No cover, 10pm

Kenny Roberts No cover, 10pm

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR TIFFANY’S

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

MON - WED - Karaoke√

Erin Smith No cover, 10pm

DUH No cover, 10pm

Ohana Groove No cover, 10pm

DJ Shark in da Water No cover, 10pm

≈MON - Karaoke, 9:30pm; TUE - New Project, No cover, 10pm; WED - DJ Nature Boy No cover, 10pm

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Robbie Ray No cover, 9-10pm

Rick Glencross No cover

1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

UNISAN 2102 Vineyard St., Wailuku - 244-4500

WOW-WEE MAUI’S 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului - 871-1414

MON - DJ Blast; TUE - Astro Boys (DJs); WED - DJ Decka; All no cover, 10pm

Crunch Pups $3, 10pm

1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

TIP-UPS TAVERN & GRILLE

Kanoa of Gomega No cover, 10pm

Open Mind Open Mic - Every Mon. Open Mind Open Mic with spoken word, poetry, comedy— whatever you have to say here’s your chance. Free. 6 p.m., Moana Bakery, Paia, 244-9091. Open Mic - Every Saturday the Maui Media Lab hosts an open mic night for poets, muscicians and others who want to be heard. Sessions are recorded and fed to the internet. All ages are welcome. Free. 6-9 p.m., Maui Media Lab, Baldwin Ave, zumatribe@yahoo.com. Poetry Reading - Every second Thu Maui Live Poets Society hosts an open poetry reading on the West side. Free. 6:30- 9 p.m. Lahaina, 661-0517

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Wed-Fri, John Kane; Sat, Harry Troupe; Sun, Greg DiPiazza; Mon, Tue, Marvin Tevaga. All sets 7:30-9:30 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700. Cheeseburger In Paradise - Mon, Tue, Scotty Rotten; Wed, Fri, Harry Troupe; Thu, Sat, Sun, Brooks McGuire. All sets 4:30-10:30 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855. Cool Cat Cafe - Thu, Erin Smith; Fri, Sat, Dave Carroll; Sun, Wed, Whale Sharks; Mon, Mickie Moore; Tue, Jazz; . all sets 7:30-10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908. Hard Rock Cafe - Mon, Marty Dread, 6:30-8:30 p.m. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 570-7400. Hula Grill - (Early sets) Wed, Thu, Fri, Sat Ernest Pua’a; Sun,Mon, Kawika Lum Ho; Tue, Jarret Roback. Early sets 3-5 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Braddah Brian & Roy; Fri, Brian, Roy & Kawika;. Sat, “TBA”; Sun, Ryan Tanaka & Friends; Mon,Oversized Productions; Tue, Roy & Friends; Wed, An Den. Late sets 7-9:30 p.m. 2435 Ka`anapali Parkway, Building P, 667-6636. Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Mon-Sat, Acoustic music. All sets 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapi`ilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787. Kimo’s - Mon- Wed, Sat, Sun, Sam Ahia. Fri, deAquino Bradaz. All sets 6:30-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811. Leilani’s On The Beach - Fri, Scott Baird;. Sat, JD and Harry; Sun, Kilohana. All sets 2:30-5 p.m. 2435 Ka`anapali Pkwy, Building J, 661-4495. Moose McGillycuddy’s, Lahaina - Fri, Llayne & Pro Ed; Sat, Mark & Mike. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., 667-7758. Mulligan’s on the Wharf - Fri, AnRil. All sets 7 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661-8881. Pioneer Inn - Thu, Ah-Tim Eleniki; Tue, Captain Billy Bones; Wed, Greg Di Piazza. All sets 6-8 p.m. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. Santa Fe Cantina -Tue, Ryan from Silky Ringo; 4-8 p.m. Sat, Damien; 5-8 p.m. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7805.

Sea House Restaurant - Thu & Fri, Kincaid Basques; Sa,-Coelho Morrison; Su, Andrew Kaina; Mon, Albert Kaina, Tue, Kincaid Basques; Wed, Albert Kaina. All sets except Sat. 7-9 p.m. Sat set is 6:30-9p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapi`ilani Rd., Napili, 669-1500.

SOUTH MAUI Capische at the Diamond Resort - Sat, Barry Flanagan and Eric Gilliam Christmas Dinner Show. 6:30-7:45 p.m. Diamond Resort, 555 Kaukahi St., Wailea. 874-0500. Haui’s Life’s A Beach - Thu, Erin Smith. 1913 South Kihei Rd., 891-8010. Henry’s Bar and Grill - Gina Martinelli Jam. 6-8 p.m. 41 E. Lipoa St. Kihei. 879-2849. Longhi’s - Sat, acoustic music. 10:30-11 p.m. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891-8883 Ma`alaea Grill - Thu, Fri, Sat, Benoit Jazz Works. All sets 6:30-9 p.m. Maalaea Harbor, 243-2206. Mulligan’s on the Blue - Fri, Gail Swanson; 68 p.m.; Sat, Sun, Celtic Tigers; Mon, Gypsy Pacific; 7 p.m. Tue, Randall Rospond; 6:30-8:30 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131. Shangri-La - Sat, Acoustic Sitar By the Sea. 6:308:30 p.m. 760 S. Kihei Road. Suite 109, Menehune Shores, Kihei, 875-4555. South Shore Tiki Lounge - Fri, Erin Smith; Mon, Kanoa. All sets 4-6 p.m. 1913 Kihei Rd., Kihei Kalama Village, 874-6444. Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café - Sun, Mon, Brittany; Wed, Sat, Merv Oana Thu; Fri Margie; Tue Jamie Lawrence. All sets 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. Tradewinds Poolside Cafe - Thu, Kawika Lum Ho; Fri, Kaleo Cullen; Sat, Louise Lambert; Sun, Mon, Kenny Roberts; Tue, Ramen & Cora; Wed, Keoki Ruiz. All sets 6-9 p.m. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 874-6284.

CENTRAL MAUI Café Marc Aurel - Live Music on various days (check the Grid); Mon, Open Mic Night. 7:30 p.m. 28 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-0852. Main Street Bistro - Th-Fri, Rhythm & Blues with Freedom. 5-7:30 p.m.. 2051 Main St., Wailuku, 244-6816. Wowee-Maui’s Kava Bar & Grill- Th, Hawaiian Jazz & Fusion w/ Robbie Ray. 6-9 p.m. Fri, Keolu & Ekolu, Hawaiian Raggae, 6-9 p.m. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1414.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI Hana Hou Cafe -Wed, Dorothy Betz and Les Adam with Vince Esquire. Thu, Haiku Hillbillys. Sat, Live music. All sets 6:30-9:30 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd, Haiku Cannery, 575-2661. Jacque’s - Mon, Live Jazz. 5 p.m. 120 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-8844.

TUE - WED - Karaoke√ MON - Monday Night Football

Morning Glories Organic Internet Cafe Fri, Elaine Ryan, 3-4 p.m.; Mon, Karen B, 1-2 p.m.137 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-6009. Moana Cafe & Bakery - Wed, Benoit Jazzworks; Thu Mark Johnstone, Fri, Classic Hawaiian with Jocelyn, all sets 6:30-8:30. Sat, Live jazz music with Mark Johnstone & Friends, 12:30 2:30 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI ■ HYATT REGENCY MAUI RESORT & SPA 200 Nohea Kai Dr, Lahaina, 661-1234 Weeping Banyan Lounge - Nightly, Live music. All sets 6:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly. ■ KAANAPALI BEACH CLUB 104 Ka`anapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill - Wed, Thu, Live music; Fri, Patrick Major; Sun, Wayne and Friends; Mon, Tue, Ernest Pua`a. All sets 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly. ■ KA`ANAPALI BEACH HOTEL 2525 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 661-0011 Kupanaha - Nightly, Hula show, 6:30-7:30 p.m. Tiki Courtyard - Nightly, Alanui with Uncle Rudi; Sun, Hula show. All sets 6:30 p.m. ■ NAPILI KAI BEACH RESORT 5900 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Napili, 669-1500 Thu, Kincaid and Albert; Fri, Sat, Mon, Tue, Kincaid Basques; Sun, Kapule Paoa; Wed, Albert Kaina. All sets 7-9 p.m. ■ RITZ CARLTON 1 Ritz Carlton Drive, Kapalua, 669-6200 Banyan Tree Restaraunt - Wed & Thu, Ranga Pae 6:15-9:45 p.m. ■ ROYAL LAHAINA RESORT 2780 Keka`a Dr., Ka`anapali, 661-3611 Royal Ocean Terrace - Thu, Fri, Sat, Live Hawaiian. 6-8 p.m. ■ SHERATON MAUI HOTEL 2605 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 661-0031 Lagoon Bar - Nightly, Hula dancing during sets. Thu, Kulewa; Fri, Ralph and Allan; Sat, Fausto and Kawaika; Sun; Kulewa; Wed, Nathan and Ralph. All sets 6-8 p.m. Torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset nightly. ■ THE WESTIN MAUI HOTEL 2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525 Ono Bar & Grille - Thu, Sat, Steve Sargenti; Fri, Larry Golis; Sun, Margie Heart; Mon, Ernest Puaa; Tue, Brian Haia; Wed, Pam Peterson. Tue-Sun shows, 6-9 p.m. Mon, 5:30-9 p.m. Tropica - (Early sets) Thu, Wed, Brian Haia; Fri, Sat, Mon, Marvin Tevaga; Sun, Josh Kahula; Tue, Ernest Pua`a. Early sets 3-6 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Fri, Wed,

Benny Uyetake; Sat, Tue, Mitch Kepa; Sun, Steve Sargenti; Mon, Josh Kahula. Late sets 6-9 p.m.

SOUTH MAUI ■ FOUR SEASONS RESORT WAILEA 3900 Wailea Alanui, 874-8000 Lobby Lounge - (Early sets) Thu, Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran; Sat, Mon, Island Style Trio with hula dancing. Early sets 5:30-7:30 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson; Fri, Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis; Sat, Mon, Nils and Anastasia; Sun, Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria; Wed, Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata. Late sets 8:3011:30 p.m. Torchlighting ceremony nightly. ■ GRAND WAILEA RESORT HOTEL & SPA 3850 Wailea Alanui, 875-1234 Botero Bar - Wed, 5:30-9:30 p.m., Live music. Humuhumunukunukuapua`a - Nightly, 5:30 p.m., Strolling Hawaiian Duo. ■ THE FAIRMONT KEA LANI MAUI 4100 Wailea Alanui, 875-4100 Lobby Bar - Nightly, 5:30-9:30 p.m., Live music. ■ THE SHOPS AT WAILEA 3750 Wailea Alanui East Wing - Wed, 6:30-8 p.m., Marti Kluth. Lower Courtyard - Wed, 6:30-8 p.m., Jamie Lawerence and Friends. ■ WAILEA MARRIOTT 3700 Wailea Alanui, 879-1922 Kumu Bar & Grill - Nightly, Hula dancing. 6-9 p.m. Mele Mele Lounge - Nighly, Live music. 9-11 p.m. ■ MAUI PRINCE HOTEL 5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111 Molokini Lounge - Mon, Wed, Fri, Sat, Mele `Ohana Duo. Tue, Thu Ron Kuala’au; Sun-Thu sets 69 p.m.; Fri, Sat sets 6-10 p.m. Sun, Mele `Ohana Duo, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Mon, Wed, Fri, Hula performance, 6-6:45 p.m.

EAST MAUI ■ HOTEL HANA-MAUI Hana, 248-8211 Paniolo Lounge - Thu-Sun, Live music. 6:309:30 p.m. Main Dining Room - Thu, Sun, Hula dancing. 7:30-8:15 p.m.

Send your listings and photos for the Da Kine Calendar to Kate Bradshaw at calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 244-0446

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DECEMBER 18, 2008

35


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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

CLASSIFIEDS CONTINUED ON P. 39

DECEMBER 18, 2008

37


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SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) Cynics proclaim that there’s nothing new under the sun, and that everything that exists is just a reiteration of something that’s come before. They’re right and wrong. Perhaps everything’s been done. Maybe it’s all just mashing up ideas from the past. But there’s no need to be so blasé about it. Not new doesn’t mean it can’t be new to you, at least. There are many fresh new flowers sprouting up in your life right now. Take time to admire and appreciate them; even though they may have been around since time immemorial, this is the first time they popped up in your yard.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) You’ll make mistakes all your life. That’s part of what life is. Some people react to their mishaps poorly. This is how people get convinced that they’re born losers with rotten luck. Others, however, choose to learn from their errors and avoid making them again. Even a relatively stupid creature, like a bird, can grasp the concept of a glass window—provided it survives its first collision with one. Here’s hoping that you outlive your mistakes. Provided you do, you can take the steps required to keep from reliving them— and keep them from overshadowing your existence from here on out.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Personally, I think a little healthy competition is incredibly fun. Of course, I’ve also seen it cross a line into distinctly ugly territory. There are invisible boundaries in all our play, and sometimes it’s possible to run afoul of them without realizing it. At the dog park, a slightly-too rough nip can transform a playful gambol into a serious fight. The same can happen—in less obvious ways—to us, when we’re competing with others. Even lighthearted banter can cause a serious wound if it strikes a spot that’s already raw and tender. Be wary of that kind of thing this week, and if it happens, be sure to rush in with apologies and balm for the wound, so that you can both happily go back to playing another day.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) Even your good habits can mess you up. I have a friend who was so diligent about brushing her teeth after every meal and snack that she brushed the enamel right off. In all things, even those purported to be good for you, there must be balance, and, ideally, variety. Make sure that you don’t take your good intentions too far. Carried to extremes, they’re just as bad for you as a heroin addiction. Your life should be about lots of things. If it feels like it’s down to only a handful, you may want to reassess, and alter course.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) What is it with you and always opting for these complicated, twisted scenarios? Sometimes, the most simple, obvious solution is the best way, and your (perhaps unconscious) determination to navigate the issue into a murky gray area just makes things harder on everyone. Not everything has to be tricky and subtle. Some things are straightforward, and incredibly easy problems to solve, if you can just bring yourself around to taking the boring route of the straight line between points A and B. If you see people rolling their eyes or shaking their heads as you detail your next convoluted set-up, please take that as your cue; Come up with a plan that can be explained in ten words or less, then implement it.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) This is one of those things that some people mistakenly believe is easier than it actually is. Attempting it anyway leads to the kinds of mishaps we see when people try to cut their own hair, for example. I love that you’re confident, and believe yourself capable of virtually everything. You are. Some things, however, are best tackled after a bit of training or preparation. Just jumping right in, though certainly in line with your usual m.o., would probably lead to disaster. Don’t give up on this dream; just set yourself up so you can properly bring it to fruition.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Very few people in your life have truly earned the right to challenge or question your decisions. When one of them actually does, though, it’d be kind of stupid not to listen and take them seriously. Despite public opinion (and your own private assessment), you’re not always right. You may be more or less on point most of the time, sure—but that means when you screw up, you do so royally and on a grand scale. Could this be one of those potentially ignominious moments? One of your dearest friends seems to think so. Ignore them at your peril.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20)

– – “Na– ‘Oiwi ‘Olino – People Seeking Wisdom” 6:30a.m. – 9a.m. weekday mornings on

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DECEMBER 18, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) Television scriptwriters have the luxury of making their characters do and say exactly what they want them to. Their challenge is to make those actions realistic or appealing enough to keep viewers interested. Producers of reality shows, on the other hand, have to cobble a story together out of whatever happens, with their only influence the situations into which they thrust the people involved. You, my dear, have neither of these quandaries to face, since you’re not producing a TV show, but just your life. I could see how you’d get confused—you’re so good at manipulating people and scenarios that you might feel you have an obligation to do so. You don’t. This week, just let things unfold as they will, even if the results would score really low Neilson ratings.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22)

Empowering Hawaiians, Strengthening Hawai‘i

38

It’s all about listening and paying attention. Those you’re (to some extent) responsible for are actually pretty capable of letting you know, one way or another, how much they can handle. It’s probably a lot more (or perhaps much less, in some cases) than you’d guess. Trying to impose your hypothesized limits on them will just breed resentment and frustration, especially when they’re trying so hard, in their limited ways, to communicate the actual boundaries of the scenario. Can you please pay attention long enough to perceive them? Then your enforcement of them will be welcome and helpful, instead of intrusive and annoying.

It’s perilously easy to pull into the fast food drive-through and pick up something insanely unhealthy for a bargain price. This is how so many people get fat. Leos, who combine a strong sense of entitlement with a natural languor (sometimes called laziness), are especially vulnerable to temptations like these. You should be wary of inexpensive conveniences—they’re probably not very good for you. Nothing in your life should be terribly hard, but there’s no need to make things this easy—not when the unseen costs are so high. Drive by the drive-through, please, and go home and make a salad.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) I hate robbing you of your sweet illusions, but what I hate worse is when they end up screwing you over. The sooner you figure out that while most people have good hearts and intentions, some people are just downright mean. It’s not even personal anymore, and they might not even realize they’re doing it, but they’re bound to be nasty to you if you let them. Recognize this, and do what you have to do to prevent it from having too great an impact on you. I think feeling betrayed and deceived is more likely to make you hard and bitter than a fair warning. This way you can still give most people the benefit of the doubt they deserve.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) If your goal was to lose weight, there are a number of ways you could go about it. You could choose the “quick-fix” route, get stomach-stapling surgery, take out a rib or two while you’re at it, and go on heavy appetite-suppressing medication. Or you could try the likely healthier option of simply eating more intelligently and exercising more. Perhaps neither is particularly appealing to you, but one has the clear edge over the other, and it doesn’t involve hospital bed rest. If that’s not as obvious to you as it is to me, there’s something wrong. This week, make sure your priorities are properly aligned, and that you’re making smart choices rather than lazy ones.


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