The McGill Tribune Vol. 16 Issue 18 by The Tribune

Published by th e Stu d en ts’ S o ciety o f M c G ill U niversity

Shakespeare showbiz The Bard's “cultural authority ” examined in McGill prof’s new book B y M ic h a e l U l l y o t

More than Madonna or O.J. Simpson, “Shakespeare,” writes Michael D. Bristol, “has hit the big time.” The M cG ill English profes sor’ s latest book, B ig - tim e S hakespeare, rigorously outlines the “sheer vulgar celebrity Shakespeare has enjoyed for sever al hundred years.” Within the last six months, a barrage of the Bard has descended on today’s cultural industries — f ilm ve rsio n s o f R om eo & J u lie t, H a m le t, T w e lfth N ig h t, The W in te r ’s T a le , and L o o k in g F o r R ichard, best depict the heightening

O n a c o ld w in t e r ’s d a y , lo v e a n d roses w i l l keep y o u w a rm . S ta r tin g o n p a g e 13, f iv e p a g e s o f lovenotes, s e rve d u p a s p ro m is e d .

invasion. Locally, Shakespearean is rampant both in traditional produc tions and in the salient allusions within other works. M a cb e th cur rently runs at Monument-National and was recently injected into Players’ Theatre’s L ittle Shop o f H o rro rs . The English department’s M a d B o y C h ro n ic le , opening this week, apes H a m le t, and Dawson did their take on M u ch A do A b o u t N o th in g in December. According to Bristol, Shakespeare exists beyond his time, transcending both history and the division between high and low cul tures. “[In the book] I try to articu late Shakespeare’s long-term cul tural authority, where specific works take on a life of their own in a culture because they’re so richly sedimented with meaning, and because they have ways of reveal ing new meanings to successor cul tures far removed in time from the original composition.”

UQAM and Carleton cancel CRC blood drives B y E r ic L a m a r r e

Blood drives have been can celled at two university campuses this month because of disagree ments w ith the C anadian Red Cross. At the Université du Québec à Montréal, disagreement centred on Question 15 of the C R C ’ s Donor Health Assessment Questionnaire which reads, “I f male, have you had sex with another male, even once since 1977?” Anyone who answers affirmatively is not permit ted to donate blood. The nature of this question has provoked a reac tion among mem bers o f the Association des Lesbiennes et Gais de U Q A M . “W e received com plaints regarding the discrifninatory nature o f this questionnaire. W e have, since then, decided to take action against the Red Cross until our objective is complied w ith,” said A L G U Q A M spokesperson Denis Paquette. A L G U Q A M ’s main objective is to have the C R C m odify Question 15 to comply with the demands o f the gay community. The group feels that adding the phrase “having unprotected sex with another male” would elim i nate the discriminatory tone of the

C o ntinued on Page 2 7 W a lf c s a f e N C C w O rK 398-2498

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confrontational, the CR C pulled out of M cGill. They returned at the end of January, however, to hold a blood drive in conjunction with the E ngineering and Science Undergraduate Societies. In an e ffo rt to m ediate the issue at U Q A M , the C R C and A L G U Q A M formed a discussion group called les Services à la vie étudiante. Members o f the S V E include A L G U Q A M President Catherine Hamel, executive council member o f the U Q A M students’ society Alain Thibeault, and a rep resentative fro m the C R C . Discussion among SVE members has not yet resulted in any concrete solutions. “Unfortunately, the meeting did not reach the conclusion that we had hoped fo r,” said André Ménard. The situation that took place at Carleton University was along a slightly different line. Although Question 15 was of concern to the G ay, Lesbian, and B isexual Community of Carleton University, their main focus was on the con duct of CRC staff during the blood drive that took place last October. According to Michael Macky, spokesperson for the G LB C, “the Red Cross staff were explicitly dis criminatory” in some of their com

ments during the blood drive. “Com m ents such as ‘ here comes another bad apple o f the bunch,’ were heard by gay individ uals,” he said. As a result, the Students’ Society o f C arleton U n iv ersity decided to cancel the blood donor clinic that was scheduled for this week, as well as all future clinics, until the C R C agrees to certain conditions such as a mandatory sensitivity training course for its staff. “This s en sitivity train in g course can be taken at Carleton or elsewhere as long as it corresponds

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Aboriginal People: Royal Commission debated at McGill conference............................. Pg.2 Science: Using waste to treat water pollution.......................... Pg. 9 jobs: Student entrepreneurs cruise the m arket......................Pg. 9 Michael Franti: An interview with Spearhead frontman....Pg. 79 Basketball: Martlets recover from loss with blowout victories..Pg. 23 W hat's On Listings..........Pg.27

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question. In addition, however, A L G U Q A M has supported more stringent means of action against the CRC. “I f the previous means aren’t e ffe c tiv e , we are n ’t afraid to encourage gay students to respond inaccurately to the question,” said Paquette. Citing the threat to the safety of its blood supply, the CRC can celled its blood donor clinic at U Q A M scheduled for this month. “The cancellation is a result of the gay and lesbian community’s decision to challenge the present [C R C ] system ,” said A ndré M én ard , spokesperson for the CRC. “W e can’t subject potential patients to the risk that the blood might be infected with H IV . Giving blood is a privilege not available to all persons such as sexually-active gays, IV drug users and individuals having sexual relations with H IV positive partners.” Relations between M cG ill stu dents and the CRC were disrupted last November when the CRC can celled a blood drive sponsored by S S M U . S S M U President Chris Carter sent a press release to the CRC in order to draw attention to the fact that as a gay man, he is prohib ited from g ivin g blood. Interpreting C a rter’ s actions as

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NeWS

February 11th, 1997

First Nations demand change: “Cycle of dependency must end” years to increase Aboriginal eco nomic development and productivi ty in order to end the vicious cycle M cG ill played host to the first of dependence. major public discussion on the most Assem bly o f First Nations expensive Royal Commission report Grand Chief Ovide Mercredi point in Canada’s history. ed out that Aboriginal people are Over 800 people attended a 3 1 J a n u a r y /ja n v ie r made to feel they are “begging for a three-day conference on the Royal handful of dollars” while the rest of Commission on Aboriginal People Canada is “getting wealthy from held two weeks ago. First Nations the resources of the First Nations of leaders, politicians, academics, this country.” lawyers and economists came to “The future or our people, I ’m express their opinions on both the sad to say, is going to be resisted at m erits and shortcomings o f the every turn by people who argue it RCAP report. costs too much money to correct First released in November, the the m istakes,” M ercredi said. five-volume report that took nearly “Canada was ranked by the United five years to complete examines Nations as the best country in the every aspect o f Aboriginal life in world and the prime minister...likes Canada — from the impact of the to cite that recognition. But First first colonists on traditional life, to Nations do not see this country in the problems o f displacem ent, the same way because wealth is not G r a n d C h ie f o f th e A s se m b ly o f F irs t N a tio n s O v id e M e rc re d i spoke a t M c G ill Sara Jean Green poverty, substandard living condi tions and government policies of land claims tribunal, implementa dence of Aboriginal nations and recom mendations that a Royal shared with them.” Matthew Coon-Come, Grand assimilation. that “the Royal Commission makes. tion of Aboriginal self-government, claim ed C h ie f o f the James Bay Cree, According to the RCAP report, and increased federal expenditures C om m ission’ s proposals would Even though the RCAP held argued that “it’s time for this coun Canada must first acknowledge that have worse consequences but...most over 300 days of public hearings try to confront history” because it is to promote economic development. “the main policy direction pur “Aboriginal laws and institu of these proposals won’t likely be and deliberation, published 4,000 the only way “to diffuse a social sued...first by colonial then by tions would reflect Aboriginal val implemented anyway.” pages, issued 440 recommendations time bomb.” Canadian governments has been In addition to Flanagan’s criti and cost $58 m illion, the federal ues and culture...where the injus “We must end the dependency wrong.” Recognition of the coun tices of the past would no longer cisms, Southam New s’ National government has been slow to com syndrome on the federal govern try’s true history, the report claims, define people’s life chances,” said Affairs columnist Andrew Coyne ment. Prime Minister Jean Chrétien will lead to a renewed relationship Com m ission C o -C h a ir Georges asserted that special status for First said that the government w ill not ment and the poverty of our peo ple,” he said. “W e must revisit our between A b o rig in al and nonNations, especially the right to self- undertake to implement any changes history so we can regain our selfErasmus. Aboriginal people. Reactions to the report have not government, constitutes “a funda before the next federal election. Furthermore, the provision of a ll been positive, how ever. mental departure from liberal demo Minister of Indian Affairs Ron Irwin respect.” However, in a time of fiscal an adequate land and resource base University of Calgary professor and cratic values.” Regarding Canada’s asserted that the RCAP’s proposed are necessary for Aboriginal com advisor to the Reform Party Thomas past treatment of Aboriginal people, expenditure increases are too steep restraint, government down-sizing and cuts to social programs, even a munities to become self-sufficient. Flanagan called the report “politi Coyne said, “I don’t accept collec for Canadian taxpayers. sympathetic Canadian population, The report also recommends the cally unrealistic.” Flanagan rejected tive guilt or trans-generation collec “...There has to be an under may refuse “to reaffirm the rights of establishment o f an independent the idea of recognising the indepen tive guilt.” standing that [the government] not Aboriginal people and the impor only has to deal with aboriginal tance o f their culture [because] issues, we have to deal with unem Canadians don’t judge this as a pri Will the government H a v e y o u c lim b e d ployment, unity, health issues, trade, o rity ,” said Quebec judge and heed the commission’s bringing down our deficit and con Com m ission C o -C h air René e v e r y m o u n ta in ? trolling our interest rates, because if advice? Dussault. C ro s s e d e v e r y s tr e a m ? Former Prime Minister Brian we don’t do that there won’t be any “The work of the Commission Mulroney gave the mandate for the money to do the things we want,” is only one step in the quest for S t i l l h a v e n ’t f o u n d w h a t RCAP in 1991. The failure of the Irwin said in an interview with the change,” Dussault continued. “The y o u ’r e l o o k i n g f o r ? Meech Lake Accord and increased G lo b e a n d M a il after the report’s message...has to be heard unequivo unrest among First Nations people, release. cally by all governments — we T u e s d a y Feb . 1 1 , 1 2 p m culminating in such crises as the must convince our leaders...so Oka stand-off, forced the govern Desperate need for Canada can get rid of the shadow Mardi Gras Lunch ment to acknowledge that it could that hangs over our society.” Newman Centre no longer ignore the problems fac change Despite the diverse opinions One fear expressed at the ing Canada’s Aboriginal population. regarding the RCAP report, there M c G ill conference was that the At the time, Canada’s human rights seems to be agreement on the idea commissioner claimed Aboriginal fin an cial cost o f im plem enting that change to current government RC A P recompiendations w ill be issues were “the most glaring policies is long overdue. There is human rights problem in this coun used as an excuse to do nothing. the fear, however, that the federal try” — a statement that has been The federal government currently government will balk on its respon reiterated in subsequent reports both spends an estimated $2.5 billion sibility to rectify the mistakes of the annually to offset poverty of First in Canada and abroad. past. Join the McGill Chaplaincy Service for the The main criticism levied at Nations, but lost income and pro “The lives of Aboriginal people ductivity costs the economy an royal commissions in general is that celebration of the a sh es marking th e in Canada is evidence that the pre additional $5 b illio n a year. they are often used by politicians to sent system does not work,” assert However, over 50 per cent of the beginning of the lenten season. deflect political pressure since such ed former Prime Minister Joe Clark Aboriginal population is under the in-depth reports usually take many “We have an obligation to give the m years to complete. Moreover, com age of 25, which w ill see the price most serious consideration to this A Roman Catholic Service will be held at 5:15 p.m. missions are independent bodies o f m aintaining the status quo most serious report on how to from the government. Since they are increase to a projected $11 billion a change.... It is unacceptable to us for N ew m an C e n tre year in 20 years. The RCAP report F e b ru a ry 1 2 th not policy statements, the govern proposes an expenditure boost of $2 these proposals to fall off the table 3 4 8 4 P e e l S t. ment is not bound to implement any billion a year for the next 15 to 20 in the absence of a real debate.” 1 2 :3 0 p .m . 3 9 8 -4 1 0 4 By S a r a J e a n G r een

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News

February 11th, 1997

Page 3

Continuing ed students prepare for protest against expected cuts By D arryl Levine More student protests may be on the way as continuing education students from across Quebec prepare to launch a pre-em ptive strike against the PQ government. Cuts to education are again dividing government and students. This time, students are concerned about the possibility o f reduced funding to university continuing education programs. Quebec Education M in ister Pauline Marois mandated a work study group to advise her on ways to reduce government funding to uni versities in November. W hat has worried continuing education stu dents is a specific reference in a doc ument from M arois’ office which asks the group to look into ways to change the “method and level of public funding” of non-degree pro grams. “The document leaves no doubt as to the intention o f the govern ment,” said a press-release from the newly founded Coalition pour le saufgarde du financement des pro grammes des certificat universi taires, a group representing continu ing education students from around the province. “They want to reduce funding to certificate programs. The consequences will be disastrous for the students affected.” A group representing M cG ill’s 11,000 continuing education stu dents has joined the Coalition to help pressure the government. Teim or Abbasi, president of the M c G ill Association of Continuing Education

Students, hopes to convince the gov w ill back away from any possible ernment to discuss proposed changes funding cuts to their programs. However, relatively poor gradu before decisions are finalised. “No one knows exactly what ation rates among continuing educa kind of cuts the government is going tion students is one problem Marois to make,” said Abbasi. “We had a asked the work study group to inves tigate. The minister choice to either questioned what wait for the work could be done to study group’ s I h o p e th e g o v e r n m e n t final report, or to c o n s id e r s h o w im p o rta n t increase the num ber of graduates take action now. th e s e p ro g ra m s and whether certifi We have decided a r e b e fo r e m a k in g a n y cate programs to act. We are should be offered at telling the gov fin a l d e c is io n s . the university level. ernment that if — T e im o r A b b a s i, “W hat new they want to cut, M A C E S P r e s id e n t budgetary rules then let’s discuss could urge univer it before any sities to reduce the length of studies decisions are made.” For their part, the Quebec gov and reduce drop-out rate?” asked ernment has refused to say whether Marois in the document outlining the or not continuing education pro work study group’s mandate. “How grams w ill be cut. Christiane do we modify the current incentives Miville-Duschêne, press attaché to for graduating in a way to increase the education minister, explained its effects?” But the CSFCU believes the sit that no decisions have been made by either the work study group or the uation is not as bad as the govern ment thinks. While they acknowl minister. “We haven’ t received the edge that only 21 per cent of stu report, and so we haven’t decided dents finish certificate programs, anything,” she said. “The minister they stated that the numbers have to will only make her decision once the be put into perspective. “We must remember that the report is presented to us at the end of March. We can’t comment on some graduation rate among part-tim e undergrad students is 26.2 per cent thing which doesn’t yet exist.” But students are not taking any throughout Quebec,” said the chances. The CSFCU is planning on CSFCU in a press-release. “This is sending postcards to all members of not just a problem unique to certifi the Quebec legislature to protest the cate programs.” The CSFCU added that deter possible funding cuts. After the suc cess of student protests staged at the mining funding to certificate pro end of last year, continuing educa grams based on graduation levels tion students hope the government ignores the unique situation of con-

Red Cross ta k e

C ontinued from Page 7 to our o b jec tiv e. The course should introduce the staff with a guide as to what constitutes appro priate language as well as provide practice in role playing to deal with future situations sensibly,” Macky said. A lthough the C R C was responsive to the conditions, they have yet to confirm when such courses w ill be required for all its staff. For his part, Carter is pleased that the issue he tried to bring up at M c G ill last semester is now being discussed and debated at other university campuses. He hopes that with pressure, the CRC might have no other choice but to modify its questionnaire. “I am happy that it has pro gressed to this point,” he said.

F ree

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to mobilise student groups, universi ty faculty, and business professionals who all have an interest in ensuring that the government continues to fund continuing education depart ments. The C S FC U met in TroisRivières this past weekend to discuss their plan of action. Abbasi hopes the rising pressure from student groups will compel the PQ govern ment to act in a reasonable fashion. “We have a lot of continuing education students who can’t afford huge tuition increases, but who need to upgrade their education,” said Abbasi. “I hope the government con siders how important these programs are for these students before making any final decisions.”

tinuing education students. Monetary concerns are a powerful incentive for students to abandon their studies and older students usually have greater financial responsibilities which can interfere with their studies. “Basing government financing on graduation levels would com pletely ignore that the performance of universities is not the only expla nation for why students abandon their studies: the incentive to get into the job market...also constitutes a very important factor,” stated the CSFCU press release. Marois’ work study group is to report back to her by March 30. Student groups are worried that once recommendations are made, the gov ernment will move swiftly to imple ment them in time for the start of the 1997-98 school year. CSFCU hopes

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Page 4

News

February 11th, 1997

Students to vote on French at McGill, funding for athletics B y E lisa beth W

asserm an

Struggling through a six-hour meeting which saw insults hurled and members walking out, SSMU council managed to approve some of the proposed questions fo r the spring referendum period. Council held its last meeting before the February 10 deadline for submitting referendum questions to be voted on in March last Thursday. Over the course of the six-hour long session, councillors subjected refer endum questions, representing months of work, to the scrutiny of their peers.

Money for athletics and student services

spent on athletics goes to varsity athletes. This is not some secret fund for football guys. The complex is as much for casual recreational users as it is for athletes,” Pound stated. Pound hopes that with the money from students, most of the new facilities will be up and running by September. Plans are also complete for a new student services building to replace its current incarnation in the Powell building, which, according to SSM U President Chris Carter, is inadequate. “The current student services building is in a poor location and a poor physical state, and is not big enough,” said Carter. The new structure would be attached to the W illia m Shatner University Centre.

Students will be asked whether they are willing to contribute $30 a semester to a university improve Addition of French ment fund — $20 of which will go towards the construction of a new language courses Also to be addressed in the ref student services building, and $10 to complete work on the new athletics erendum is a student life issue of an academic nature. In view of complex. Athletics rep Peter Pound pre M cG ill’ s 20 per cent francophone sented the plan for the athletics com student population, science represe n t a t i v e plex, which has Valerie Panetbeen in the works If you want to Raymond pro for 15 years, and which he contends add French classes to posed that M cG ill should would be a crucial step toward improv our curriculum just to get add courses taught in money from the ing the quality of French to sev student life. government,then you are eral of its fac “For those of selling out. ulties. you who have gone Currently, into the fitness area, — Glenn Posner explained you realise how _______ Medicine Rep. P a n e t embarrassing it is,” Raymond, Pound commented to council. “Compared to other uni M cG ill has the smallest number of versities, it’s pathetic. This [referen French classes of any Canadian uni dum question] will give students the versity. M cG ill students may take opportunity to give a vote of confi courses at a number of francophone dence and of pride in this universi universities in Quebec for credit, but grades obtained outside of M cG ill ty-” Pound was emphatic in dis may not be calculated into a McGill pelling misconceptions which tend student’ s CGPA. This, she main tained, is an inconvenience to many to surround athletics funds. “There is a myth that all money francophone students. Panet-

C o u n c illo rs d e b a te p o te n tia l re fe re n d u m q u e s tio n s la s t T h u rs d a y .

Raymond emphasised that new classes would not be offered instead of English classes, but rather would alternate with identical English counterparts. Some councillors voiced appre hension that the proposed change would threaten M cG ill’ s status as an “anglo haven” in the midst of a French region. “As an anglo Quebecker who intends to stay here, I am con cerned,” said SSMU VP Finance Jon Chomski. “There are plenty of other French language institutions in Quebec, and I want this university to be here for my children to go to as an English language institution.” Chomski found little sympathy from his fellow councillors, most of whom were enthusiastic about the proposal. “We need to eliminate this ele ment that M c G ill is up on a pedestal,” said clubs rep Adam Giambrone. “We need to be building bridges.” Carter also felt that more French classes would be an

improvement. “I came here e x p lic itly to improve my French, and I think that French classes at M c G ill leave something to be desired,” said Carter. Though the cost of new classes and new professors was raised as a potential obstacle, Panet-Raymond claimed that the changes would improve M cG ill’s relationship with the Quebec government, and the net result would lik e ly be financial improvement. “M cG ill is being targeted in a number o f ways by government cuts,” Panet-Raymond said. “Our funding is cut more than U Q A M ’s or [U niversité de] M o n tré a l’ s, because a lot of students come from out of province and a lot leave. The financial question might turn around to our advantage in the end.” Medicine rep Glen Posner, call ing him self a “paranoid anglo phone,” sided with Chomski, and criticised the line o f reasoning voiced by C arter and PanetRaymond.

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Jesus as S a vio u r • H a n k Potts (Intervarsity C hristian Fello w ship) • M aria M ungai (R o m an Catholic) Jesus a n d W om en • R ev. E lizab eth G rah am (Presbyterian) • M s. Lois K lem p a (Presbyterian) Jesus a n d Judaism • Sr. D ian e W illy (R o m an Catholic) • R ev. M atti T e rh o (Lutheran) Jesus a n d Justice • R ev. K ate Jordan (Presbyterian) • M r. M ich ael B affo e (School of S ocial W ork)

“Students coming from out of province find it fascinating here, in this distinct society...but McGill is a safe haven for anglophones. If you want to add French classes to our curriculum just to get money from the government, then you are selling out.” In the end, council voted over whelmingly in favour of passing the question on to students. In another vote, a proposed question regarding the extension of dental plan coverage to international students passed unanimously.

Procedural chaos interferes with question

As midnight approached, the session ended abruptly as two coun cil members left, causing quorum to be broken. Consequently, decision on a controversial question regard ing the restructuring of the SSMU executive committee was suspended. Carter, who had presented the question, suspected that the breaking of quorum was a deliberate attempt to foil his proposal. He claimed that a council member whom he would not name made a deal with the two quorum-breakers, Engineering rep Adrienne Bajaj and Education rep Prachi Srivastava, promising to sup port a proposal of theirs in return for their opposition to Carter’s question. “This was clearly behind-thescenes politicking,” said Carter. “I think it ’ s absurd that democratic process has been stopped on proce dure.” Carter further pointed out that breaking o f quorum is explicitly prohibited by the SSM U constitu tion. B ajaj, however, adamantly denied Carter’s charges, claiming that her reasons for leaving were strictly personal and “had nothing to do with any of the motions on the table.” In a memo issued on Friday, Bajaj decried the disorderly and unnecessarily lengthy proceedings, denying that she behaved irresponsi bly by leaving. “I don’t think democracy is best served by forcing people to stay and ignoring their fundamental rights,” wrote Bajaj. “There is something terribly wrong with the system.” On this last point, Carter and Bajaj were in agreement. “This whole incident is a clear illustration of the desperate need for the restructuring of council,” said Carter.

News

February 11th, 1997

Briefs U of C Students’ Union cannot run candidate

The discovery o f a little known clause in A lberta’ s elec tions legislation spells the end of hopes that a Students’ Union can didate would run in the upcoming Alberta provincial election. The U n iv ersity o f C algary Students’ Legislative Council had previously voted to support run ning a candidate, but SU researchers learned that institutions funded by the province are prohib ited from running a candidate. The SU receives partial funding from the Alberta government. The elections are going to be a critical time for the SU to raise public awareness about education issues. The outcome is a disap pointment for the executive. “W e’re not very happy about it ,” said SU President Sarath Samaresekera. “It ’s important for post-secondary education issues to be on the table, and this is a seri ous setback for us.” The SU plans to proceed with an information campaign involving brochures, signs and advertising. — w ith file s fr o m The Gauntlet (U n iv e rs ity o f.C a lg a ry )

Raise for Queen’s profs to come out of nowhere ?

A deal reached between facul ty and administration will mean an increase o f nearly $1 m illion in faculty salaries at Queen’ s next year. It remains to be seen, howev er, where the money w ill come from. “Currently the budget of ‘96’ 97 has already been struck and set, and there wasn’t any excess money,” said Queen’s University Staff Association President M ark Publicover. This raise, the first in four years, will translate into an average merit pay increase of $1,900 for most of Queen’s 850 faculty mem bers. Queen’ s University Faculty Association President Frank Burke points out that faculty have gener ally been underpaid compared to other institutions and that this agreement w ill serve to mitigate the risk o f losing top faculty to schools with higher salaries. “The Queen’s administration recognises this h istorical factor...The contract makes some strides in that direction.” — w ith file s fro m

The Queen’s Journal

Private sector gives stu dents an edge

In response to Canada’s high youth unem ploym ent rate, over 100 com panies have jo in e d together to form Career Edge — a private sector initiative designed to help high school, college, and u n iv e rs ity graduates enter the work force. C u rren tly, Canada’ s unem ployment rate for people between the ages of 18 and 25 is approxi m ate ly 17 per cent. Since Septem ber, host organizations have sponsored over 200 s ix -, nine-, and twelve-m onth intern ships, each with an annual stipend o f $15,000. A c c o rd in g to In te rn a l Relations Assistant Adeel Haider, Career Edge is an opportunity for young people to gain valuble work experience and make the transi tion to full-time employment. “They’re caught in a vicious cycle — no experience, no job. Now how do you get experience if you c a n ’ t get a jo b ? ” H a id e r asked. For those w ith internships, the average age is 24, and the majority have a university diplo ma. Although no one has complet-

Got a problem with a story? Well then, kiddo, write a letter to the editor, or e-mail üs at tribune@ssmu.mcgill.ca.

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H a s th e s y s t e m t r e a t e d y o u u n fa ir ly ? H e a r d s u s p ic io u s

ed a full internship yet, 30 interns have been hired full time by their host companies. H a id e r stated that C areer Edge aims to place 20,000 interns w ith in the next fiv e years. Prospective interns may apply directly through Career Edge’ s web site:

n o is e s c o m in g fro m th e fa c u lt y c lu b ? W e w a n t to h e a r y o u r sto ry . C a ll th e

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February llth , 1997

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♦ H

Letters

Published by the Students’ Society of McGill University

McGILL TRIBUNE “Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.” — A n n e M o r r o w L in d b e r g h L iz L ao

Editor-in-chief S ara J ean G reen

R achel S tokoe

Assistant Editor-in-chief

E d i t o r i a l

The politics of paranoia By Elizabeth W asserman

“I am not an irrational paranoid anglo,” medicine rep Glen Posner told SSM U council in self-defense last Thursday. “But I am a paranoid anglo.” Supported by a few councillors and speaking undoubtedly for many other students. Posner was reacting to a proposal to increase the amount of French in M cG ill’s curriculum — a move which he feared would undermine this university's status as “a safe haven for anglos.” Posner’ s argument epitomises the cultural-linguistic paranoia, suf fered by both anglophones and francophones, that is the fountainhead o f political strife in this province. Approximately 20 per cent of M c G ill’s population is francopho ne, most o f them in the faculties of engineering and science. Many of them, rather than struggling through humnanities classes taught in their second language, prefer to take their electives at francophone universities in Montreal. The proposal intended to address this incon venience is a modest one: to introduce French versions o f a few courses already offered in English. Yet some see it as a threat to the continued existence of English higher education in Montreal. It is time that Quebec anglos stopped behaving like embittered colonialists surrounded by hostile natives. Wc must not let our irrita tion with political extremists and their petty language laws cause us, out of paranoia, to commit the sin which offends us. Partial bilingual ism at M cG ill would not be a cancer, threatening the survival of a fragile anglo tradition. English remains the pre-eminent language of international business, politics and popular culture, and to destroy it in the universities o f this cosmopolitan, North Am erican city is beyond the capacity o f a constitutional democracy. Far from posing a threat to the well-being of M cG ill, the French language and culture of Montreal are among its greatest attractions for out-of-province students. Unfortunately, many of them arrive to find that a kind of cultural apartheid prevails, and that it is possible to spend four years here without learning French, let alone mingling comfortably in francophone society. It is a division that is to the dis advantage o f all. Far from being a homogeneous enclave, a university is precisely the place where cultural and political differences should be given full play. There can be no better way to battle irrational fears. I f we are serious about the quality of our education, and about the value of M cG ill in an international context, we have to welcome this change. I f socio-cultural reasons and considerations of equity and respect are not sufficient, there is a substantial economic argument as well. That government cuts to education always seem to hit M cG ill harder than they do francophone universities should not surprise us. It stands to reason that by making itself more accessible to the people who make up close to 85 per cent o f Quebec’s population, M cG ill w ill improve its standing with provincial officials. Located in the midst of a shrinking anglophone population, hav ing just reduced its appeal to out-of-province students with differen tial tuitions, offering salaries that cause professors to flee, and having lost its paramountcy in the Maclean’s ratings, M cG ill has little raison d’etre as a so-called anglo haven. I f this university is to attain excel lence, it must aim to attract the best o f both worlds, and to provide a much-needed bridge between francophone Quebec and English North Entertainment Editors

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to the Editor SSMU continues to be inaccessible to the disabled

Tw o members o f ACCESS McGill met with the executive coun cil of the Students’ Society of M cG ill University on February 3, 1997. In our meeting with them we discussed various changes that were essential in order that the University Centre become accessible to all of our students. Included in our discus sion was also the need for people to be educated on accessibility and making accommodations for people who have different needs. In atten dance at the executive council was M ark Feldm an, Don M cG owan (who sits on the Senate Subcommittee on Disabilities), and Johnathan Chomski. Only three days later, I discov ered to my surprise that the SSMU Council Meeting held on Thursday evening had changed from an acces sible room in Shatner to the inaccessible building of M arlet House. There is no ramp to this house so any student in an electric wheelchair would not have been able to enter the building. Those in manual wheel chairs would have had difficulty as there is a small step to go up. There is an elevator in the building but one needs a key to operate it. A drien ne K. B a ja j I, a M cG ill student who pays E ng in ee ring Rep my fees like everyone else, am total ly disgusted with the SSMU execu tive. Council is a meeting that is sup posed to be open to all McGill stu Fundamental right to dents but instead I find it totally inaccessible to a portion of our popu leave meeting lation. The worst part is that For the record, I would like to ACCESS McGill audited the Shatner state that I congratulated Ms. Bajaj building in January, wrote up our results and then went even further by and Ms. Srivastava for practising their common sense and fundamen writing up recommendations to the tal right as free citizens to leave executive. It is not our responsibility to make the SSMU-accessible. We when they must. I will go so far as to applaud their courage in taking the have already made great efforts to initiative to leave council regardless educate them. Now our executive must at least make some effort to of what others may say. It is not meet us half way. This lack of con often that we see individuals do what is right. Furthermore, for the record I sideration is totally unacceptable for any student council at any university would like to include myself with Ms. Bajaj and Ms. Srivastava as in Canada in 1997. breakers of quorum. With the above stated, I would E le a n o r G irt like to now take this time to state E x te rn a l C o o rd in a to r that I do not apologise for having left A C CESS M c G ill council last Thursday night. Last night’s meeting was pathetic. It is pitiful that after six hours of council, Councillor takes a stand we had not even gone through half o f the agenda. W hen I compare As a dedicated councillor, it SSMU council to Senate, I laugh at was not my intention to end the the ineffciency and childishness of democratic process of council on SSMU council. For those who do not Feb. 6, 1997. know, at the last Senate, 24 motions There are several points that were passed in four hours (which is should be brought to light. Having considered by the 100 senators to be been questioned several times on the too long of a meeting). When I think reason for my departure, it is worth that it took 22 councillors six hours

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noting that my reason, whether a family emergency, sickness, or of an academic nature, is of no concern to council, nor is it irresponsible to have to leave on any grounds. I am well aware of my responsibilities and my priorities. It just so happened that I chose to take a stand and not allow council to continue at infinitum. At present, council does not conduct business in an orderly fashion and, therefore, meetings do not finish at a reason able hour. I don’t think that democ racy is best served by forcing people to stay and ignoring their fundamen tal rights. There is something wrong with the system. As for Mr. Carter’s questioning my service to the Faculty of Engineering, he is not of my con stituents and therefore his opinion on this matter is completely irrelevant and out of line. Furthermore, these insinuations concerning my dedica tion do nothing but divide council. Perhaps M r. Carter should finally realise that unlike the president, most councillors are volunteers, not taking reduced course loads and not paid to attend to SSMU duties. M r. Carter should in future attempt to be part of the solution and not the problem. I hope that this situation will not arise again in the future.

Staff Tanim Ahmed, Manny Ahnela, Mila Aung-Thwin, Michael Bezuhly, Rebecca Catching, Park Cho, Chris Colley, Stuart Detsky, Abigail deVries, Daniel Farb, Paul Futhey, Daniel Hackett, Elizabeth Hargreaves, Jane Hutton, Angelie Kim, Kevin Koch, Eric Lamarre, Samuel Lapalme-Remis, Darryl Levine, Alex Mathias, Samantha McGavin, Dom Michaud, Kris Michaud, Lyla Miller, The Minh Luong, David Mizener, Ben O’Hara, Allison Perry, Susan Peters, Aaron Rollins, Aron Tonon, Michael Ullyot, Sarah Winn

to pass three motions, once again I have to say pathetic. When the cir cumstances are considered, the action taken by the “quorum break ers” was appropriate and called for. Finally, I demand an apology from President [Chris Carter] for his unprofessional and non-diplomatic responses to the actions taken by Ms. Bajaj and Ms. Srivastava. For those who were fortunate enough not to have been there, Mr. Carter had the gall to state that what Ms. Bajaj and Ms. Srivastava were doing was poor representation of their faculties. Not happy with this statement, he stated that Ms. Bajaj should not have run for the position if this was how she was going to behave. First of all, Mr. Carter is not an engineer nor an education student and thus has no right to question their representation. Furthermore, Mr. Carter does not know their pri vate lives and thus should not be questioning their motivations. His statement questioning whether some one should have run for a position is unbecoming of a president. As the executive in charge of council he should not be making statements like this, especially when he is supposed to be making council run smoothly and with respect and not antagonis ing councillors [sic], I am deeply disappointed by M r. Carter for neglecting his responsibilities as President of Assembly. N uno Gama S en a to r/B o ard Rep.

SACOMSS responds to Outreach letter I can’t understand the motiva tion behind the letter written by the men of Outreach, nor why they think they are in a position to attack Mr. M cG owan and a group that has never been given a chance to prove itself. The idea of starting a male group against sexism at M cGill has ciruclated several years now, within both SACOMSS and Walksafe, and the function was to be very different from Outreach’s (one I know well). While I will never doubt Outreach’s importance to our community (that is why I was a member for years), a men’s groups against sexism would deal with different issues not laid out in their manual. Part of the project was to include such things as spon soring peer education for high school athletic teams, health awareness, support for male survivors and event coordination — things that are NOT, as he boldly states, performed by the Outreach program. The coordinator, M r. Kershaw, would have known this if he had taken the time to ask M r. McGowan for information on the group, instead of leading SACOMSS into a misguided public attack. With this simple request they would have learnt that this was the idea of several men and women at McGill, and it was I (a woman) who convinced McGowan it deserved a chance — indeed several Outreach members who “signed” your letter had already signed Don’s member ship sheet! It is absurd that SACO M SS believes that they have a monopoly

C ontinued on Page 7

O p in io n

February 11th, 1997

Page 7

Uncle Timand the global repercussions of an X chromosome [italicsmine]

If you go to that place where websites exist, and you poke around randomly, you might eventually find the M c G ill T rib u n e website. But considering the number of webpages out there, the chances are slim. However, Timothy Aungthwin of Melbourne, Australia did this; he managed to stumble across my col umn and recognised that we shared a last name. After centuries of trying, humans have finally perfected the message-in-a-bottle. Last week I received an e-mail message, via the T rib u n e , from my Uncle Timothy in Melbourne, and I didn’t even know I had an Uncle Tim othy in M elbourne, or any where. He obviously didn’t know who 1 was, because he wanted to know if I was “M ik e ’s daughter.” No, I am not. Mike is not my father, but rather my dad’ s brother, and lives in Hawaii. Furthermore, I am

male. (As an aside, I would like to take this paragraph to inform T rib u n e readers, and other citizens of Earth, that I am male. Maybe I should have promoted this fact with a picture of myself in the little box next to the title — instead of the unrelated cartoons. Anyway, I am curious to know if anyone out there has been reading this thinking I was female. I would just like to get this cleared up before St. Valentine’ s Day, or at least by the time my income tax return is due.) When Uncle Timothy sent me his letter, it automatically included his return e-mail address. I tried to reply, but somehow the address didn’t work, and my wonderful let ter written to a long-lost relative kept getting sent back to me by M cG ill’s Postmaster General, who 1 guess is some sort of irrational, lazy

robot. I suppose I could send Uncle Timothy a normal letter. I M ila A u n g -T h w in called my BN8J @M US ICB.MCGILL.C A grandmother and she confirm ed his umn on a global computer network existence, supplied me with a and was able to send a message to detailed report of his childhood and me instantly. I can’t seem to grasp also some A u ng-Thw in fam ily the enormity of this. In fact, it blows genealogy, so I ’m sure she’d have my mind. I can’t understand where his postal address. The benefit of this World Wide Web actually is. normal letters is they do not get sent Nor can I understand the fact that it back because semi-colons have been can be simultaneously winter in omitted, or because some law of Montreal and summer in Australia. lower-case has been violated. So far this year, this column has However, with normal letters you generated almost as much response have to worry about the possibility from readers in Australia (Uncle of letter bombs, as well as the price Tim ’s letter) as it has from M cGill of stamps. students (three letters in defense of Let’s return for a moment to the the Pope). To augment the flow of^ fact that an unknown relative from correspondence, I have two options: Australia stumbled across this col either I have to start writing about

relevant topics, or I have to start asking you readers direct questions Ponder: 1. Did you used to think I was a female? 2. If yes, did you think I was a lesbian? 3. W hich gender would you prefer me to be? 4. Are you related to me? Please respond to me at BN8J@ M USICB.M CGILL.CA and I would prefer responses from a wide range of countries and belief systems. Perhaps even a word or two from the Faculty of Dentistry. Hope you read this. Uncle Timothy. The only cofrespondence I seem to get these days are from relatives in Burma asking me to send them cans of Pepsi.

M r . A u n g - T h w in c o n tin u e s searching f o r lo n g lost fa m ily m em bers.

Quebec: a place where corruption and intolerance reign I thin k that as an o u t-o fprovince student at M cG ill I am a very very lucky individual. Not only have I learned about literature, music, history, and finance, but I have also learned how to live in a society of corruption» intolerance and exploitation. This is not to say that other provinces and communi ties in Canada are not corrupt but only that I fin d M o n tre a l, and Quebec, to be particularly so. Strangely enough, after attend ing M cGill for four years, the most important lesson that I have learned is not anything I have picked up from my classes but rather lessons in realpolitik taught by a man of only the highest moral and ethical standards, the leader of this great province, Lucien Bouchard. What Bouchard and his political party of the week have done for the people o f Quebec is truly rem arkable. They have succeeded in creating a society of division, intolerance, and ignorance that would be tough to replicate anywhere in the “free” world. It’s getting to the point here

where an anglophone who does not speak French has as much chance of getting fair treatment by govern ment institutions in Quebec as a black man had of getting a fair trial in the US south in the early 1960s. Examples of this lack of ethics and integrity in governm ent abound. One that im m ediately comes to mind and that hits home for o u t-o fprovince M cG ill students is the enormous tuition increase that the PQ government has insti tuted for the upcoming academic year. The reason that o u t-o f province students’ tuition will rise by approximately 50 per cent next year while those of Quebec resi dents w ill remain the same is a classic example of how Bouchard’s government has targeted the politi cally weak in order to pursue their destructive political agenda. Currently, tuition in Quebec is about $ 1 ,3 0 0 less than the Canadian average. As a result of

this, universities in Quebec are chronically underfunded and the q u a lity o f education in this province is suffering. But this fact alone seems to be of little concern to the present provincial govern-

Rearview Mirror Daniel Farb ment. W hat they do care about, however, is the large percentage of university students (almost exclu sively francophone) who support their separatist, divisionist agenda. The provincial government does not want to alienate this large block of impressionable, idealistic, and misguided voters by raising their tuition to the necessary levels. Instead, the PQ wants to coddle this group of supporters by keeping university tuition unsustainably low in return for this group’s much needed political support. The irony of the situation is

Letters on issues dealing with all aspects of sexism on campus, and publicly ridicule other people’ s attempts to get involved and participate. How do they think this will lead to something productive? If they have legitimate concern about men working against sexism then why are men in Outreach at all — what makes those 17 men so much better and Outreach the “optimal” format to follow to the exclusion of all others? Mr. Kershaw, in his attempt to stake his claim in the battle against sexism, has single-handedly discour aged legitimately interested people from becoming involved, and destroyed a group that was intended to work alongside Outreach. Why? To make some nasty remarks to McGowan that he didn’t deserve?

by the PQ on this matter is both ignorant and exploitative. Firstly, the revenue generated from increasing the tuition o f out-of province students will have virtual ly no im pact on increasing the funding of Quebec universities, and secondly, by going after out-ofprovince students, students who by law are not allowed to vote in this province and who cannot affect the outcome of the next referendum, the PQ is just showing the rest of Canada and the world how willing they are to exploit what they per ceive to be the weak and powerless in order to further their misguided and destructionist political agenda. 1 think that it’s time for out-ofprovince students to speak up and tell the PQ government how we feel about their underhanded and divisionist tactics and let them know that we recognise them for the wolves that they are. M r. F a rb is le a d in g a coup on th e g o v e r n m e n t a n d th e s c h o o l la te r th is m onth. In te re ste d ? W ell, we w ere ju s t k id d in g , so d o n ’t ca ll.

Tribune G eneral S ta ff M eeting Wednesday, February 19

continued C ontinued from Page 6

that by keeping university tuition at such low levels, the government is hurting, rather than helping, their most fervent political supporters, by forcing the quality of their edu cation continually lower as result of a lack of adequate fund ing. The repercussions of this strategy are extreme ly serious as over time the q u a lity o f education received by university stu dents in Quebec will fall (if it hasn’t already) to a level where Quebec educated students will not be able to successfully compete with other students educated in the rest of Canada. What must have happened is that some genius in the Party Québécois government realised that the province’ s universities were underfunded and uncompeti tive and then decided that some thing had to be done. This “guru” realised that tuition had to be raised in order for Quebec universities to remain competitive. But the course of action taken

To offer your “willingness” to inter view him for a position like you are part of the elite? To say you need more money from students even though SACOMSS receives over $20.000 in direct student funding already? Why? Is this your way of leading “by action”? What real good did you just accomplish? I strongly suggest that in the future Mr. Kershaw get the permis sion of ALL his members before he signs their names in a letter that they don’t endorse, without their permis sion, and has it published [sic], I apologise to those men of Outreach whom I know did not have a part in this. M a ris a Ayesha A hm ad T ra in in g coo rd ina tor, SACOMSS

The Tribune invites all o f this year’s writers, pho tographers and production assistants to jo in us at our annual staff meeting. We will be discussing all the sections, and their aims for next year. W atch out for the location o f the meeting and a more detailed schedule in next w eek’s Tribune.

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February 11th, 1997

Page 8

Catharsis through strange cat torturing rituals plague McGill aquarius (Jan. 19-Feb. 18) Did you know that there’s a toilet monopoly in North America that’s stopping you from getting the newest Japanese technology? That’s right, not only could you have a more water efficient model, you could have one with built in deodorisers and bidet function. Forget complaining to Kerr, report your dissatisfaction to the Prime Minister — maybe odr new trade relations may get you something remotely useful. pisces (Feb. 19-M arch 20) Y ou loved him as Rem ington Steele, you fawned over 007. The magic returns in D ante’ s Peak. Check out Pierce’s star appeal for yourself. Start chanting “ Sean Connery w ill never die!!” in the theatre and see how long before you’re lynched. aries (M arch 21-A pril 19) V a le n tin e ’ s is D -day for lonely hearts. Stave off the depression and lock yourself in the closet. Cancel your telephone connection for the

week so you’re not tempted to call ex-flames and confess your undy ing love.

your roommates o ff with tales of passion and intrigue (just don’ t mention it was a film).

cancer (June 20-July 22) Watching the X -F ile s has left you bleary-eyed and craving vitamin C. I t ’ s a sign that you’ re getting too old for a devil-may-care attitude. Tim e to straighten S. Struthers out and fly from a bouncer who demanded straight. positive ID . Your significant other is convinced they’re evidence of leo (July 23-Aug. 22) crimes of passion. How to ease the Ever since Helen Guriy left Cosmo tension? Show him/her you really you’ve lost the guidance you have care this V .D . with an econo con come to depend on. Need a new tainer of lard (forget disguising the agony column? Have weekly bitch sessions with a half dozen art histo artery dogger in chocolate). ry majors. gemini (M ay 21-June 20) Maybe you’re one of the lucky few virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) with a date. Now ’s the time to stick What M cG ill needs is a protest like it to the people who taunted you the one they’re having in Belgrade. last year! Even if you don’t have a Now that I ’ve planted the seed, do date, sit in a movie house for a cou with it what you will. ple of hours, come home, and piss

taurus (A p ril 20-M ay 20) On a recent trip to New York, you got some nasty marks of distinction

Horoskop

libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Seems like Vampire role playing has gone the way o f twister and hoola hoops. You know better. Sharpen up your styrofoam knife collection and go to work on the city. scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) No one knows the secrets o f the magic chamber better than you. Put your prowess to good use this Valentine’s day and invest in a half pound of versatile and spreadable whipped cream. S a g it t a r iu s

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

avoiding V.D. and shooting the wall D e a r D o c S., 1 am w ritin g , n o t because 1 am a f f lic t e d w ith a n y e x o tic s e x u a l p a th o lo g y ( t h a t ’s a ll b ee n d e a lt w ith thanks to m y Dianetics book), b u t m e r e ly b e c a u s e m y c u r r e n t p a r tn e r is a lle g e d ly , "c o m p le te ly tu rn e d o ff” b y me a n d t h in k s t h a t I 'm “ a s o rry excuse f o r a man. ” / d o n ’ t g e t i t ; m y b la z e o ra n g e c o v e ra lls a n d buckin -h e a t-lu re ju s t a re n ’t w o rk in g . I even t r ie d s e v e ra l m a tin g c a lls w h ile u rin a tin g a t each c o r n e r o f the bed. N ee dle ss to say, / need a sure f ir e tech niq ue f o r s tim u la t in g m y l i t t l e e w e ; a f t e r a ll, V a le n tin e ’s D a y loo m s on the h o r i zon. Please help, Sue Ee

useful advise that both you and our non-scenting readers can use to ensure an earth-shattering Valentine’s. The vast m ajority o f Homo Sapiens turn their mates on by

Dr. Smooth

Dear Sue, Although it seems like you have a lot more to worry about (notably, several extreme paraphil ias) and no contact with what I like to call “reality,” I ’ll write some

A a r o n R o llin s

stimulating their genitals. One pop ular technique is stimulating the GSpot (named after the curious Dr. Grafenburg). The G-spot, or ure thral sponge, is located somewhere on the front wall of the first 1-2 inches of the vaginal barrel. Before stimulation, it feels like a bean sized soft mass of tissue, but after a little prolonged stroking it can swell to the size of a silver dollar. The G-spot can be found by probing the area gently but firmly with two fingers. The woman will initially feel as though she has to urinate, but reassure her that it’ s

only her body preparing for im pending e jacu latio n . It is extremely important that you do your best to keep her relaxed and open to the experience at hand (no pun intended). W ith continued stroking, she w ill eventu ally experience a vagi nal orgasm w hich is characterised by intense pleasure, uterine con tractions, and often the ejaculation of a viscous, whitish fluid. This type of orgasm is highly revered in our society by the omnipotent Freud. He claimed that the ability to orgasm from this type of stimulation marks a fem ale’ s passage into mature womanhood. A lso , a western A fric a n ritu a l directly translated as, “Shooting The W all,” involves the ejaculation of a post-pubertal girl onto a sacred board. Until she accomplishes this task, she is regarded as immature and forbidden to m arry. Happy Hunting.

W a n t e d : A W E B P A G E D E S IG N E R A N D M A N A G E R T h e T r i b u n e is lo o k i n g f o r a m a n a g e r f o r o u r w e b p a g e n e x t y e a r . If you: • h a v e p r e v io u s e x p e r ie n c e d e s ig n in g a n d u p d a t i n g w e b p a g e s • h a v e id e a s a b o u t h o w t o im p r o v e o u r p r e s e n t p a g e • a re in te r e s te d in e le c tr o n ic jo u r n a lis m • a r e lo o k i n g t o g e t i n v o l v e d i n a w o r t h w h i l e e x t r a c u r r i c u l a r a c t i v i t y c o m e b y t h e T r i b u n e o f f ic e as s o o n as p o s s ib le , a n d s p e a k t o J a s o n S ig u r d s o n ( N e t w o r k E d it o r ) o r L iz L a u ( E d i t o r - i n - C h i e f ) . Y o u m a y a ls o c a ll u s a t 3 9 8 D O O M , o r e - m a il u s a t t r ib u n e @ s s m u .m c g ill.c a .

ACROSS I . Anti-con 4. Miami is one 7. Think New Hampshire but with out the “New Hampsh” 10. Thank Afrika Bambaataa for this I I . A run that is the result of the batter’s hit 12. Mayan language 13. 22nd letter of the Greek alpha bet ( I’m not sure whether they mean the Ancient Greek alphabet or the modern one, and I ’m not sure if there’s a difference.) 14. Think Albania but without the “ania” 15. The D a ily stacks ‘em, the T rib u n e spreads 'em around. Take yer pick. 16. Two words, rhymes with “hosebag” 19. Work hard (verb), or hard work (noun) 21. Line again 24. They came to Montreal! We did a story on ‘em! I forgot to get tick ets, but they have an indefinite run at the Orpheum Theatre in NYC! 26. It’s easy to be one if you don’t want your blood or organs 27. Cruise Crescent lookin’ for these 29. If “Hades” wasn’t the singular of “Hades,” this would be 30. Tony Curtis played one in Trapeze!

32. M y summer roommate said, “— [ is life!” She sketched ... acted ... you know. 34. M y ex-girlfriend eventually

has cut the budget on snow removal, broken limbs in hospital visits has doubled? Seems like the ER may be the place to hang for lonely hearts on Valentine’s Day. Go with a dozen roses, a box of chocolates and a good book to bide your tim e until M r ./M s . R ig h t comes along.

capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

You thought about going skiing for Winter break. Instead, why not go on a series of guided tours of L.A. drug rehabs? N o t only w ill you hob-nob w ith the best o f them, you’ll get the justification you need to sell your soul to the corporate world and make loadsa moolah. acted this way towards me 35. The Go Gos’ record label 38. — Kwon Do 39. Cigarettes have this. Yummy 40. Harvard without the “Har— d” 41. You’re not there yet 42. The Maltese Falcon, sans malt 43. I ’ve got tons to spare DOW N 1. PMRC without the music 2. Rah — rah 3. Someone who has

opinions is — 4. Undergarment for women and busty men 5. More able 6. — , for her pleasure 7. Most modem poets, writers, film makers, and musicians are not — 8. Wicked! 9. kays, ells, — 17. Pre-Mayan civilisation visited by aliens? 18. Greeting by Don Ho 19. TSH ( I’m sorry; I couldn’t think of a clue for this one.) 20. Non-“teleph” telephoto 22. Sleep is the land of — 23. Shakespearean before 25. Fool’s gold 28. Sodas, but with a “c” and not a “d” 31. “Pyre,” if you have a stuffy nose 32. Past eat 33. Kurosawa’s K in g L e a r 36. Bad publication 37. No seats available C re ated by the C o g ix C ro ssw ord W iza rd a n d D ave S o lu t io n to la s t w e e k ’s p u z z le

February 11th , 1 9 9 7

S Page 9

Student entrepreneurs cruise on in to the job market By Elizabeth H arcreaves

o u t th e re ,” s a id M c M u r t r y .

F o r a ll o f th o s e w h o a re d re a d in g p o s t- u n iv e r s ity l if e , M c G i l l la w s tu d e n t

Angus

t io n a l b a c k g r o u n d s ; M c M u r t r y d id

W h i t n e y , a s s is ta n t h e a d o f c o u n

“ T h e s tr a te g ic d e c is io n s m a d e

m o s t o f th e c r e a t iv e w o r k , w h i l e

s e llin g a t M o r n in g s ta r S e c o n d a ry

s p e n t a y e a r a n d a h a l f d e v e lo p in g

in [ p a r t n e r s h ip s ] te n d t o b e m o r e

M c Q u i ll e n w a s i n c h a rg e o f f in a n

S chool

th e

a c c u ra te o v e r tim e , ” h e s a id .

c ia l a n d m a r k e t in g a s p e c ts . W h ile

E d u c a tio n in T o r o n to . S h e f i r s t sa w

and

m u lt im e d ia

package,

and

th e

Peel

B o a rd

and

w o r k e d a n a v e ra g e o f 11 h o u rs p e r

J o h n s o n a d d e d t h a t “ d e f in in g

m a in ta in in g a d i v is io n o f re s p o n s i

th e p r o g r a m in J u n e 1 9 9 6 w h e n i t

M a tt

d a y . D e s p ite t h e ir f r u s t r a t io n s a n d

th e ro le s o f e a ch p a r tn e r v e r y c le a r

b i l i t i e s , M c Q u i l l e n r e m a r k e d th a t

w a s p re s e n te d to 3 0 o f h e r s tu d e n ts .

M c Q u ille n m a y j u s t p u t y o u r fe a rs

o c c a s io n a l la p s e s i n m o t i v a t i o n ,

to re s t.

“ C a re e r C r u is in g ” is n o w re a d y f o r

“ I ’ v e h a d o th e r p a r tn e r s h ip s

W e s te rn

M B A

M c M u rtry

s o lo v e n tu re s .

M c Q u ille n

M c M u rtry

g ra d u a te

th e w o r k lo a d w a s e q u a lly s h a re d .

W i t h th e c r e a tio n o f t h e ir C D

m a r k e tin g a n d d is t r ib u t io n , h a v in g

w h e r e I e n d e d u p d o in g a l l th e

R O M e n title d “ C a re e r C r u is in g ,”

i n c u r r e d c o s ts o n l y a f r a c t i o n o f

w o r k . B u t w i t h A n g u s w e h a d th e

th e s e in n o v a to r s h a v e n o t o n ly

w h a t a la r g e r c o m p a n y w o u ld h a v e

sa m e w o r k e th ic ,” h e s a id .

o p e n e d u p c a r e e r p o s s ib i l it ie s f o r

s p e n t.

g r a d u a te s , b u t h a v e a ls o s e t a n

t r u s t ” b e tw e e n p a rtn e rs as a p r e

e x a m p le o f s u c c e s s fu l e n tre p re n e u r-

v ia b le o p tio n f o r p o s t-g r a d u a te s

re q u is ite to a s u c c e s s fu l e n tre p re

s h ip th e m s e lv e s .

e s p e c ia lly w h e n jo b s se e m fe w a n d

n e u r ia l v e n tu re .

T h e C D R O M p r o g r a m g iv e s

can

f a r b e tw e e n .

success

t io n a n d its a c c e s s ib ility . “ I t ’ s b e tte r th a n a n y th in g I ’ ve n ie s ,” she s a id . “ I t ’ s fa n ta s tic . A n d m y e ig h t- y e a r - o ld c a n use i t . ” T e d B a k e r , d ir e c t o r o f th e M c G ill

A c c o r d in g t o s t a t is t ic s , th e

A c c o r d in g t o P e te r J o h n s o n ,

s tu d e n ts a r e a lis t ic lo o k a t t h e ir

th e p r o g r a m f o r

its a c c u ra c y , its w e a lth o f in f o r m a

seen fr o m th e b ig s o ftw a r e c o m p a

M c M u r t r y c it e d “ a b s o lu te

E n tr e p r e n e u r in g

W h it n e y p r a is e d

M c M u rtry

and

C a re e r

and

P la c e m e n t

S e rv ic e s , h a d n o t h e a rd o f “ C a re e r C r u i s i n g ” b e f o r e b e in g c o n ta c te d

p o t e n t ia l f u t u r e s . I t d e s c r ib e s 1 4 5

p r o fe s s o r

o f The

M c Q u i ll e n b e a t th e o d d s , w h ic h

b y th e T r ib u n e . H e d id m e n tio n th a t

jo b s w i t h c h a rts , ta b le s , a n d te x tu a l

D o b s o n C e n tre f o r E n tr e p r e n e u r ia l

w e re p itte d a g a in s t th e m p r im a r ily

C A P S h a d j u s t s ig n e d a o n e - y e a r c o n tr a c t a llo w in g th e use o f a n o th e r

in f o r m a t io n . P e rh a p s th e

and

d ir e c to r

m ost

S tu d ie s , f i n a n c i a l g a in is n o t th e

b y a c ir c u m s t a n c e b e y o n d t h e i r

u n iq u e fe a tu re o f th e p r o g r a m is a

p r im a r y m o t i v a t i o n f o r m a n y s tu

c o n t r o l — n a m e ly , t h e i r g e n d e r .

c o m p u te ris e d c a re e r p r o g r a m c a lle d

c o lle c t io n o f a u d io - v is u a l c lip s , in

d e n t e n tre p re n e u rs .

W h e n a s k e d a b o u t th e s u c c e s s

T h e D is c o v e r y P ro g ra m , a v o c a

w h ic h 4 4 0

p e o p le a re in te r v ie w e d

“ I f y o u w e re to a s k th e a v e ra g e

ra te o f e n tre p re n e u rs , J o h n s o n

t i o n a l te s t w h i c h a s k s a s e r ie s o f

a b o u t th e p r o s a n d c o n s o f t h e i r

p e rs o n o n th e s tre e t w h a t th e y t h in k

c ite d s ta tis tic s s h o w in g a s i g n i f i

q u e s tio n s in o r d e r t o d e te r m in e an

ca re e rs .

w o u ld p r o m p t s o m e o n e to b e c o m e

c a n t d i s c r e p a n c y b e t w e e n th e

i n d i v i d u a l ’ s a p t i t u d e f o r v a r io u s

“ O n e o f th e m a in re a s o n s w e

a n e n tr e p r e n e u r , t h e y ’ d p r o b a b ly

s e x e s . S e v e n ty - fiv e p e r c e n t o f

c a re e rs . C A P S is s p e n d in g $ 1 ,7 0 0

m a d e th is p r o d u c t w a s b e c a u s e w e

s a y ‘ m o n e y ’ . H o w e v e r , I ’ v e fo u n d

w o m e n s u c c e e d as e n tre p re n e u rs ,

p e r y e a r re p re s e n tin g 5 7 p e r c e n t o f

w h e re a s o n ly 2 0 p e r c e n t o f m e n

its a n n u a l b u d g e t o n T h e D is c o v e r

a re s u c c e s s fu l. J o h n s o n a ttr ib u te d

P ro g ra m . W h e n a ske d i f M c G ill

ly , v e r y e a r ly o n , is k e y to a s u c

th is d r a m a tic d iffe r e n c e t o th e te n

w o u ld c o n s id e r p u rc h a s in g “ C a re e r

c e s s fu l p a r tn e r s h ip .”

d e n c y o f w o m e n to b e “ m o re d e ta il-

C r u is in g ” a t th e e s tim a te d p r ic e o f

m in d e d .”

$ 2 5 0 , B a k e r r e p lie d :

re a lis e d th a t so m a n y p e o p le o f o u r

th a t i t is th e o p p o r t u n it y f o r in d e

g e n e r a tio n —

p e n d e n c e th a t m a k e s p e o p le g o o n

m any o f our ow n

fr ie n d s , f o r e x a m p le — h a d n o id e a

th e ir o w n .”

w h a t jo b s w e re lik e o n a p r a c tic a l,

J o h n s o n a ls o n o te d th a t e n tr e

M c M u rtry : c re a to r o f C D R O M

Rachel ° ns

d a y - to - d a y le v e l. W e w a n te d to le t

p r e n e u r ia l

p e o p le k n o w th a t th e re a re lo ts o f

M c M u r t r y a n d M c Q u i ll e n ’ s a re

a s s u m e d s e p a ra te r e s p o n s ib ilitie s in

in t e r e s t in g , r e w a r d in g a lte r n a t iv e s

m o r e l i k e l y t o b e s u c c e s s fu l th â n

o r d e r t o e x p lo it t h e ir d iv e r s e e d u c a

p a r tn e r s h ip s

lik e

M c M u rtry

and

M c Q u ille n

O n e o f th e b ig g e s t fa n s o f “ C a re e r

C r u is in g ”

J a n ic e

“ I t w o u ld h a v e to g o th r o u g h a r ig o r o u s e v a lu a tiv e p ro c e s s .”

McGill researchers using seaweed as biosorbents for water s o u rc e s ’ o f o r ig in . ”

w o r k h a s i n v o lv e d th e u s e o f sea

n o m ic g r o w t h . U n le s s e f f o r t s a re

b e c a u s e i t w a s e a s ie r t o o b t a i n

to V o le s k y , th e

w e e d s , s o m e o f w h ic h a re h i g h l y

m a d e to b e g in c le a n in g u p th e e n v i

f u n d in g f o r a n in te r n a t io n a l c o o p e r

b ig g e s t a d v a n ta g e w h ic h b io s o r p

e f f e c t iv e b io s o r b e n ts . R e s e a rc h e rs

r o n m e n t, C h in a is l i k e l y t o s u f f e r

a t iv e e f f o r t th a n f o r o n g o in g u n i

t io n h a s o v e r c u r r e n t io n e x c h a n g e

in C h in a , h o w e v e r , t r ie d

fro m

v e r s it y re s e a rc h in C a n a d a .

m e th o d s u s e d in C a n a d a a n d C h in a

s o m e th in g d i f f e r e n t : p h a r m a c e u ti

is its c o s t- e ffe c tiv e n e s s .

c a l w a s te .

A c c o r d in g

u s in g

u n p r e c e d e n te d h e a lth p r o b

le m s .

I r o n i c a l l y t h o u g h , a r e s e a rc h

F o r n o w , h o w e v e r , b io s o r p tio n

g r o u p in th e c h e m is tr y d e p a rtm e n t

A lt h o u g h i t m a y s o u n d im p o s

“ B io s o r b e n t m a te r ia ls are e s ti

B y - p r o d u c t s o f a n t ib io t ic m a n

u s in g p h a r m a c e u tic a l w a s te is n o t

a t M c G i l l r e c e iv e d a s tra te g ic g r a n t

s ib le , a n i n t e r n a t io n a lly r e n o w n e d

m a te d t o c o s t a p p r o x i m a t e l y o n e

u f a c t u r i n g c o n t a i n f u n g i s u c h as

y e t r e a d y f o r in d u s tr ia l a p p lic a tio n

f r o m th e C a n a d ia n g o v e r n m e n t to

M c G i l l re s e a rc h te a m h a s b e e n

te n th

p é n ic illiu m

a n d r h iz o p u s . W h e n

i n C h in a . W h i l e i t h o ld s p r o m is e ,

d e v e lo p m a n - m a d e i o n e x c h a n g e

w o r k in g o n a n in e x p e n s iv e a n d

t h e t i c io n e x c h a n g e r e s in s , ” s a id

p ro c e s s e d , th e y f o r m a n in e r t m u d

m o re re s e a rc h w i l l h a v e to b e c o n

re s in s , d e s p ite th e f a c t th a t b io s o r

p r o m is in g a p p ro a c h to w a te r p u r i f i

V o le s k y .

l i k e s u b s ta n c e w h ic h c a n

d u c te d t o d e te rm in e o p tim a l m e th

b e n ts p e r f o r m j u s t as w e l l i f n o t

th e [c o s t o f ] m a n -m a d e s y n

T h e m e th o d i t s e l f is r e la t iv e ly

c a tio n . B e g in n in g in 1 9 9 3 , re s e a rc h e rs

s tr a ig h tfo r w a r d . I n i t i a l l y , an a p p ro

b e d r ie d

a n d c o m p r e s s e d in t o g r a n

b e t t e r th a n th e s y n t h e t ic

u le s .

re s in s .

at M c G ill, a n d at C h e n g d u and

p r ia t e b io s o r b e n t is c h o s e n a n d

N a n k a i u n iv e r s itie s in C h in a , c o n

c o n s e q u e n t l y p r e s s e d i n t o s m a ll

d u c te d a t h r e e - y e a r c o l l a b o r a t i v e

g r a n u le s . T h e g r a n u le s a re th e n p u t

e x p la in e d w h y p h a rm a c e u

u s ,”

p r o je c t

in t o a c o lu m n , w h e r e th e y tr a p

t i c a l w a s te w a s a n a p p r o p r i

K r a t o c h v il.

s u p p o rte d

I n t e r n a tio n a l

th e

R e s e a rc h

D e v e lo p m e n t C e n tre . T h e p u rp o s e w as

d e v e lo p

te c h n iq u e s

h e a v y m e ta l io n s .

m ic r o o r g a n is m s t o r e m o v e h e a v y m e t a l c o n t a m in a n t s s u c h as le a d , n ic k e l, a n d c a d m iu m f r o m a q u e o u s w a s te . L e d b y M c G i l l c h e m ic a l e n g i n e e r in g p r o f e s s o r D r . B o h u m il V o l e s k y , th e C a n a d ia n te a m h a s th e f i e l d

b io s o r p tio n f o r th e p a s t 15 y e a rs . W h i l e e f f o r t s t o d a te h a v e c o n

w ith

“...it is an excellent tech nique to decontaminate and detoxify industrial [pollutants] at ‘point sources’ of origin.” — Dr. Bohumil Volesky, Departm ent of chemical engineering

u s in g

w h a t n a tu re h a s m a d e f o r

N o rth

A s a r e s u lt, b io s o r b e n ts a re l i k e l y

m e n t m e a s u re , th e li m i t s o f its h a v e

th e p a c k e d c o lu m n —

n o t b e e n re a lis e d .

e d ’ in ,

‘ c o n ta m in a t

‘ c le a n ’ o u t , ” e x p la in e d

V o le s k y .

o n ly

a fr a c tio n

to c o s t o f th e

fro m

p r ic e th a t i t w o u ld u s in g

A m e r ic a n

and

t o d a y ’ s w a te r p u r if ic a t io n

E u ro p e a n p h a r m a c e u tic a l

m e th o d s .

in d u s tr ie s ; t h e y ’ re v e r y p r o

A t p re s e n t, th e m a jo r

te c t iv e o f t h e ir o w n p a r tic u la r ty p e s o f m ic r o o r g a n is m s , ”

c o m m e n te d

w a s te

s a id .

“ Even

d if f ic u lt y M c G i l l c le a n s u p o u r d r i n k i n g w a t e r w i t h

Rachel Ong

is w i t h

con

f r o n t in g th e g a p b e tw e e n th e p r e - c o m m e r c i a l a n d

n e w c o s t - e f f i c i e n t b io s o r p t i o n t e c h n iq u e s

t h o u g h i n N o r t h A m e r ic a ,

c o m m e r c ia l

to n s o f m ic r o o r g a n is m s a re

a p p lic a tio n .

s ta g e s

b u r n t e v e r y d a y , th e p h a rm a c e u tic a l

o d s o f p r e p a r a tio n . O n th e in d u s t r i

“ I n th e f i e l d o f ‘ te c h n o lo g ie s ’

in d u s t r y d o e s n ’ t w a n t a n y o n e to

a l le v e l, d e f in it io n s o f w h a t e x a c tly

th is is e x tr e m e ly d i f f i c u l t to b r id g e

h a v e a cce ss [ t o th e m ].”

c o n s t it u t e s w a s te w i l l n e e d t o b e

i n C a n a d a , ” e x p la i n e d V o l e s k y .

tig h te n e d .

N o n e th e le s s , h is e f f o r t s a n d th o s e

W ith in

as a n in d u s t r ia l w a s te - w a te r tr e a t

c o u ld r e m o v e

“ W e u se w a s te , o r

ID R C ,

“ T h e r e ’ s a p r o b le m

c e n tra te d o n p r e p a r in g b io s o r p tio n

“ B io s o r p tio n

th e

n o t Canada.

d e a d b io m a s s s u c h as a lg a e o r o th e r

w ith

a te b io s o r b e n t f o r C h in a b u t

“ T h e s o lu t io n t r ic k le s th r o u g h

b io s o r p t io n , a p r o c e s s w h ic h u s e s

b e e n a p io n e e r s in

P ie r r e Z a y a , p r o g r a m o f f ic e r

C h in a ’ s

la r g e

and

s o p h is tic a te d p h a r m a c e u tic a l in d u s

A t M c G i l l , th e re s e a rc h te a m

t r y , th e a ttit u d e to w a r d s re s e a rc h o n

h a s b e e n a b le to a v o id th e s e ty p e s

a n t ib io t ic w a s te is d iffe r e n t. “ The

s itu a tio n

C h in a

o f h is te a m

h a v e r e s u lte d

n e w l y f o r m e d p a r t n e r s h ip w i t h a

o f p r o b le m s in t h e i r s tu d ie s u s in g

M o n t r e a l - b a s e d e n t e r p r is e a n d a

s e a w e e d . B e c a u s e s o m e ty p e s o f

m a jo r C a n a d ia n c o n s u ltin g c o m p a ny.

m e ta ls f r o m a l l k in d s o f c o n t a m i

O n c e th e c o lu m n is s a tu ra te d ,

in c r e d ib le , ” s a id D a v id K r a t o c h v il,

s e a w e e d h a v e a f a i r l y r i g i d s tr u c

n a te d s tr e a m s , la k e s , r e s e r v o i r s ,

a s o lu t io n is p o u re d th r o u g h w h ic h

a P h .D . s tu d e n t w h o w o rk s w ith

tu r e , e x p e n s iv e o r d i f f i c u l t p re p a r a

e v e n fro m

c o n ta m in a te d u n d e r

re le a s e s th e c o lle c te d m e ta ls f r o m

V o le s k y . “ T h e y c a n g e t to n s o f th a t

t io n te c h n iq u e s a re n o t r e q u ire d .

g r o u n d a q u ife r s w h ic h a re s l o w l y

th e g r a n u le s , r e s u lt in g i n a h i g h l y

ty p e o f w a s te w i t h n o r e s tr ic tio n s .”

H o w e v e r , V o le s k y ’ s g r o u p has

tin u e d . “ T h e o r d e r is t a ll, h o w e v e r,

s p r e a d in g ,” s a id V o le s k y . “ A t th e

c o n c e n t r a t e d s o l u t i o n o f m e t a l.

C u r r e n tly , C h in a is fa c e d w it h

c o n fr o n te d a d if f e r e n t ty p e o f p r o b

c o n s id e r i n g th e m e a g r e r e s e a r c h

s a m e t im e i t is a n e x c e lle n t te c h

F o llo w in g th is re c o v e r y , th e m e ta ls

a m e n a c in g w a t e r p o ll u t i o n p r o b

le m — n a m e ly , m o n e y . A c c o r d in g

a n d d e v e lo p m e n t fu n d in g w e h a v e

n iq u e t o d e c o n ta m in a te a n d d e t o x i

c a n b e r e c y c le d a n d re s o ld .

le m w h ic h h a s b e e n c o m p o u n d e d

t o V o le s k y , th e c o lla b o r a t iv e p r o

to c r a w l w i t h . ”

b y r a p id in d u s t r ia lis a t io n a n d e c o

je c t

f y in d u s t r i a l [ p o l lu t a n t s ] a t ‘ p o in t

M o s t o f th e M c G i l l te a m ’ s

w ith

C h in a

a ro s e

p a r tly

“ T h e n o w p r o v e n p o te n tia l o f b io s o r p tio n is th e re ,” V o le s k y c o n

February 11th, 1997

Page io F e a t u r e s

Man-Boy love: pedophiles seek legitimisation for orientation By A lex M athias W i t h th e re c e n t s e x u a l a s s a u lt o f

a tw o - y e a r - o ld

g ir l

liv e s a n d fu n c t io n as p r o d u c t iv e c i t

p o in t o f v ie w . In a tw o - m in u t e

in g s f o r c h ild r e n h o ld a s e n s it iv it y

c a s tr a tio n ,” a n d P ro z a c c a n d i m i n

iz e n s o f t h is s o c ie t y , ” s a id N A M

m o n o lo g u e ,

t o c h i l d r e n ’ s d i s t i n c t iv e s e x u a lit y

is h

BLA.

V ir g in ia n

—

b e h a v io u r

th e

1994,

N ew

Y o rk

P e tits

U n iv e r s it y f i l m s tu d e n t m a d e a d o c

G r o u i l l e u x , a n d d is c u s s io n s o f

u m e n ta r y c a lle d “ C h ic k e n h a w k ”

M o n tre a l

d a y c a re

Les

n o to r io u s p e d o p h ile

W est L e la n

d e s c rib e s s e x w it h a 1 4 -y e a r -o ld in

i t ’ s p a rt o f w h a t th e y fe e l,”

th e

in te n t

w ith

c ia lis t

and

m any

A s s a lia n a ls o u se s re la p s e p r e

P ie rre A s s a lia n , s e x o lo g y sp e

S id e m a n ’ s

com m on

p e d o p h ile s .

A n d r ie t t e e m p h a s is e d .

g r a p h ic d e ta il.

o b s e s s iv e - c o m p u ls iv e

a t th e

v e n tio n . “ W e ta k e a f u l l h is to r y a n d

H o s p ita l,

t r y to f i n d o u t w h a t a re th e s itu a

p s y c h ia t r is t

m a k in g c h i l d s e x o ffe n d e r s k n o w n

w h ic h g a v e p e d o p h ile s a fo r u m f o r

“ C h i c k e n h a w k ” w a s t o d e m y s t if y

M o n tre a l

t o th e p u b lic , p e d o p h ilia is b e c o m

e x p r e s s io n . T w e n t y - s i x - y e a r - o l d

p e d o p h ilia a n d c o n f r o n t a to u g h

b e lie v e s

in g a n is s u e o f i n c r e a s in g p u b l i c

A d i S id e m a n r e c e i v e d n u m e r o u s

is s u e m a n y o th e rs s h y a w a y fr o m .

p e d o p h ile s a re lib e r a tin g c h ild r e n is

m ay

c o n c e rn . H o w e v e r , o p p o s e d to th e ir

film

d e lu s io n a l. A s s a lia n c la s s if ie s th e

e x p la in e d . P e d o p h ile s in tr e a tm e n t

“ I n th e lo n g r u n , I h o p e i t w i l l

f e s t iv a l a w a r d s f o r h is f i l m ,

G e n e ra l th a t

any

n o tio n

th a t

t i o n s , f e e l in g s a n d t h i n k i n g t h a t tr ig g e r

th is

n e e d ,”

le g a l s ta tu s as c r i m i n a l d e v ia te s ,

g iv e m o r e in s ig h t i n t o p e d o p h ile s

p e d o p h ile as a “ h a r d c o r e c la s s ic a l

a re e n c o u ra g e d

p e d o p h ile s w a n t t o g iv e t h e ir s id e

as h u m a n b e in g s r a th e r th a n m o n

p s y c h o p a th .”

th e m s e lv e s in th e se t r ig g e r in g c o n

o f th e s to r y . The

San

F r a n c is c o - b a s e d

N o r t h A m e r ic a n M a n - B o y L o v e A s s o c ia tio n w a n ts s o c ie ty to re c o g n is e t h e ir s e x u a l r e la tio n s h ip s w i t h b o y s as lo v in g a n d c o n s e n s u a l, a n d

T h e majority of gay rights groups feel no kinship with pedophiles in the cause of sexual liberation.

r e s tr ic tio n s o n th e a g e o f c o n s e n t. A c t i n g as b o th a p o li t i c a l a n d e d u c a tio n a l o r g a n is a tio n , N A M -

has be en d e e m e d ]

r i g h t c o n d e m n t h e m , ” e x p la i n e d

c o n s e n s u a l r e la tio n s , a n d t o o p p o s e

S id e m a n .

N A M B LA

c a lls

S id e m a n d e s c rib e d h is f i l m

fo r

th e

e m p o w e r m e n t o f c h ild r e n in t h e ir s e x u a l liv e s a n d a l l o th e r a re a s o f

n o n - ju d g m e n ta l a n d n o n - c o n fr o n ta -

p e d o p h i l ia a s “ s e x u a l d e v ia t i o n , ”

d e f ic ie n t h e te r o - s o c ia l s k ills .

s o m e e x p e rts , h o w e v e r , h o ld a d i f

P e d o p h ile s b e lie v e th e y h a v e a cause

fig h tin g

fo r.

N A M B LA

“ T h e y c a n n o t r e la te t o a d u lts

B ill

A n d r ie t t e , fe a t u r e s e d it o r f o r th e

fe r e n t v ie w . A le x M c K a y , re s e a rc h d ir e c t o r o f th e S e x I n f o r m a t io n a n d

so th e y tu r n t o th e k id s ,” h e s a id .

and

M o r e o v e r , c o g n itiv e d is t o r

E d u c a tio n C o u n c il o f C a n a d a s a id

m e m b e r,

tio n s are a ls o c o m m o n a c c o r d in g to

th a t p e d o p h ilia is “ a k i n d o f s e x u a l

A s s a lia n .

o r ie n ta t io n .”

“ [P e d o p h ile s ]

s h ip s b e tw e e n m e n a n d b o y s s h o u ld

w r o n g id e a s i n

n o t b e p r o h ib ite d .

have

“ You

som e

cannot

c o n v e rt

th e ir h e a d . F o r

p e d o p h ile j u s t l ik e y o u c a n n o t c o n

A n d r ie t t e d is p u te s th e c o m m o n

e x a m p le , th a t t h is is g o o d f o r th e

v e r t a h o m o s e x u a l to a h e te ro s e x u

c o n c e p t io n o f c h ild r e n as a s e x u a l

c h i l d , th a t th e y a re p r o v i d i n g h im

a l,” s a id M c K a y . “ Y o u ca n p o s s ib ly

c re a tu re s in c a p a b le o f c o n s e n tin g to

w ith

tr e a t s o m e o n e t o n o t e n g a g e i n a

in tim a te re la tio n s .

e x p la in e d

sexual

e d u c a tio n ,”

p a r t ic u la r s e x u a l b e h a v io u r .”

M e n ta l h e a lth p ro fe s s io n a ls are

S u c h c o m p a ris o n s h a v e n o t, o n

a c h ie v e a r a p p o r t w i t h m e d ia - w a r y

th e ir d e s ire s . T o c la im th a t c o n s e n t

d i v i d e d o n t h e is s u e . H o w e v e r ,

th e w h o le , b e e n a p p re c ia te d b y th e

N A M B L A m e m b e rs .

is t h is m a g ic p r o c e s s is g a r b a g e ,”

s o m e b e lie v e th a t a n a tte m p t s h o u ld

g a y c o m m u n ity . A s N A M B L A

s a id A n d r ie tte .

b e m a d e t o r e in te g r a te p e d o p h ile s

m e m b e r s le a r n e d f r o m th e h o s t ile

A c c o r d in g to A n d r ie t t e , e r o t i

i n t o s o c ie t y . A l t h o u g h p e d o p h ilia

r e c e p tio n th e y r e c e iv e d a t th e 1 9 9 3

w h ic h

a llo w e d

h im

“ I le t th e m r e v e a l th e m s e lv e s f o r w h a t t h e y r e a l l y w e r e a n d le t

t h e ir liv e s as w e ll.

w o rth

“ C h ild r e n c a n c le a r ly v o ic e

tio n a l,

o f th e p a r tic ip a n ts .”

m o le s te d as c h ild r e n . T h e y possess

b e lie v e s t h a t c o n s e n s u a l r e la t i o n

B L A ’ s m a n d a te is t o “ s u p p o r t th e

s h ip s m e r e ly o n th e b a s is o f th e age

A lt h o u g h A s s a lia n r e fe r s to

s a id S id e m a n .

la r g e ly b e c a u s e o f its o b je c t iv it y .

r i g h t s o f a l l p e o p le t o e n g a g e in la w s w h ic h d e s tro y lo v in g r e la t io n

A c c o r d in g t o A s s a lia n , 3 0 to 6 0 p e r c e n t o f p e d o p h ile s w e re

lo n g tim e

“ [T h e f i l m

d itio n s .

ste rs. N o t th a t I r e a lly w a n t to h o ld

w h ic h s p a rk e d h e a te d c o n tr o v e r s y

c o n tr o v e r s ia l b e c a u s e I d i d n ’ t o u t

in v o lv e

th e f la g o v e r th e p e d o p h ile c a u s e ,”

B o s to n n e w s p a p e r T h e G u i d e

a re a d v o c a tin g c h a n g e s to le g a l

n o t to

th e m d e s tro y th e m s e lv e s ,” h e s a id .

c is m o f c h i l d r e n te n d s t o b e le s s

c a n n o t b e c u r e d , i t c a n b e tre a te d

gay

a ls o b e im p r o v e d e d u c a tio n a n d th e

S id e m a n ’ s d a r in g f i l m

g e n ita lly fo c u s e d , a n d c u d d lin g a n d

but

r e s u lts .

W a s h in g t o n , th e m a j o r i t y o f g a y

e s ta b lis h m e n t o f v ia b le c o m m u n ity

h a r s h v i e w i n g e x p e r ie n c e , w h ic h

g e n e r a l a f f e c t i o n c a n b e j u s t as

M e d ic a t io n c a n b e a d m in is te r e d to

r ig h t s g r o u p s fe e l n o k in s h ip w i t h

re s o u rc e s so th a t y o u n g p e o p le are

a t t e m p t s , t h r o u g h in - d e p t h i n t e r

e r o tic .

s to p th e e f f e c t s o f te s to s te r o n e , a

p e d o p h ile s i n th e c a u s e o f s e x u a l

b e t t e r a b le t o m a n a g e t h e i r o w n

v ie w s , t o p o r t r a y th e p e d o p h i l e ’ s

p r o c e s s a ls o k n o w n as “ c h e m ic a l

lib e r a tio n .

“ W e b e lie v e th a t th e re s h o u ld

is a

“ T h o s e w h o h a v e e r o t ic f e e l

w ith

v a r y in g

and

le s b ia n

r a lly

Sexual healing: taking hands-on therapy to a new level d e lit y , she f i l e d f o r d iv o r c e , a n d

tr e a tm e n t —

s u e d th e th e ra p is ts o n th e g r o u n d s

s io n s .

ro g a te th e ra p y c a n b e see n as b e n e

o f p im p in g . S u c h le g a l in t r ic a c ie s

“ T h e y s ta rt w i t h h o ld in g h a n d s,

g u id e lin e s . A s a re s u lt, h is p r a c tic e

y o u r p a rtn e r, o r

f i c i a l , so lo n g as i t is c o n d u c te d in

h a v e b e e n o b s ta c le s t o th e la r g e -

f a c ia l to u c h , f o o t m a s s a g e , e x p lo r

h a s b e e n p r o b le m - fr e e i n te r m s o f

p r o b le m s th a t h a v e m a d e y o u to o

c o n s u lt a t io n w i t h a th e r a p is t , a n d

s c a le

e m b a rra s s e d to h a v e a p a rtn e r, th e re

o n ly b e tw e e n c o n s e n tin g , u n m a rr ie d

C a lifo r n ia .

I f y o u ’ re e x p e r ie n c in g s e x u a l p r o b le m s w it h

p r a c tic e

o u ts id e

u s u a lly a f t e r 15 ses

m e n t, h e has h a d t o c re a te h is o w n

S o m e r v ille o f th e M c G i l l C e n tre f o r M e d ic in e , E th ic s a n d L a w , s e x s u r

By Samantha M cG avin

s e t o f s t r ic t m e d ic a l a n d e th ic a l

le g a l c o m p lic a tio n s a n d m is u n

d e rs ta n d in g s . T h e g u id e lin e s f o r th e ra p y

m a y b e h o p e in th e fo r m o f s e x s u r

a d u lts . S h e a d d e d th a t th e p r a c tic e

A n e v e n g r e a t e r o b s t a c le ,

ro g a te th e ra p y .

n e e d n o t, in th e o r y , p o s e le g a l p r o b

a c c o r d i n g t o S o m m e r v i l l e , is

in c lu d e th e m e th o d ’ s la s t- d itc h

B e g i n n i n g w i t h s im p le to u c h

le m s . T h e m a in p r o h ib itio n s re g a rd

p u b lic d is c o m fo r t w it h th e n o tio n

a p p ro a c h —

c o n ta c t a n d u s u a lly e n d in g w it h

in g s e x w o r k e r s a re ta r g e te d a t

o f s e x b y p r e s c r ip tio n . S u rro g a te

in t e r c o u r s e —

s e x u a l in t e r c o u r s e , t h is t r e a t m e n t

s o lic ita tio n

th e ra p y is o fte n m is c o n s tru e d as a

u s e d o n th e c o n d it io n th a t a

m a y , f o r s o m e , b e th e k e y to s e x u a l

b a w d y houses —

b o th a re c o n c e rn s

r a t io n a lis a t io n o f c a s u a l, im p e r

p a tie n t d o e s n o t b r in g a p a rtn e r

s o n a l se x.

w i t h h im o r h e r to th e ra p y ses

a n d th e r u n n in g

w h i c h s h o u ld n o t a p p ly t o s e x u a l

h e a lin g . S e x u a l s u rro g a c y has b e en

“ I t ’ s n o t lik e

s u rro g a c y .

s im p ly

p r e s c r ib in g

o th e r p s y c h o p a t h o lo g y

a wom an

W h e r e le g a l p r o b le m s h a v e

f o r th e la s t s e v e ra l y e a rs , a n d h a s

a r is e n , i t h a s g e n e r a l l y b e e n th e

in s te a d o f p r e s c r ib in g a c o u rs e o f

g r o w n so p o p u la r in C a lif o r n ia th a t

r e s u lt o f d is h o n e s ty o n th e p a r t o f

p il l s , ” she in s is te d .

s u r ro g a te s th e re h a v e fo r m e d a

th e p a tie n t. I n th e fa m o u s M a s te rs

T o ro n to

w h i c h is o n l y

s io n s , a n d th a t th e p a tie n t h a s n o

d o c to r s a re

p r a c tic e d in th e f i e l d o f p s y c h o lo g y

d e f in e d as s e x u a l

th a t

c o u ld in te r fe r e w i t h tre a tm e n t. S o m m e rs d e fe n d s h is s u r

p s y c h ia t r is t D r .

r o g a t e s a g a i n s t a n y p o s s ib l e c h a rg e s th a t t h e ir w o r k b e c o n

u n io n . H o w e v e r , t h i s i n n o v a t i v e

a n d J o h n s o n c a s e , a m a le p a t ie n t

F r a n k S o m m e rs w o u ld c e r t a in ly

th e ra p y has n o t c o m e w it h o u t c o n

fa ls e ly c la im e d to b e u n m a r r ie d in

a g re e . S o m m e rs h a s b e e n d e d i

s tru e d as p r o s titu tio n . H e tra in s

tr o v e rs y .

o r d e r t o r e c e iv e s u r ro g a te th e ra p y .

c a te d to m a k in g s e x u a l s u rro g a c y

h is “ s e x th e r a p y p r a c t it io n e r s ”

W h e n h is w i f e le a r n e d o f h is i n f i

a re s p e c te d p r a c tic e . H e has b e e n

in th e s p e c ia lis a tio n o f s e x th e r

o p e n ly p r e s c r ib in g s e x u a l s u r r o

a p y . A l l h a v e a b a c k g r o u n d in

g a c y in fin a l- r e s o r t th e ra p y f o r 21

h u m a n r e la tio n s , a n d th e m a jo r i

y e a rs , a n d c la im s

th a t it has

t y h a v e tr a in in g in m e d ic in e o r

c h a n g e d th e liv e s o f m a n y p e o

p s y c h o lo g y . O n e o f S o m m e r s ’

p le .

s u rro g a te s is a n M . D . .

A c c o r d in g

to D r . M a rg a r e t

S t i l l , S o m m e rs is f a i r l y

“ W h e n I a n n o u n ce d at a M o n tr e a l p s y c h o lo g y c o n fe re n c e

e x c e p tio n a l i n u s in g s e x s u r r o

th a t I w o u ld b e u s in g th is k in d o f

g a c y ; m o s t m e n ta l h e a lth p r o

tre a tm e n t, I w a s r e a lly g o in g o u t

fe s s io n a ls r e m a in w a r y o f th e

o n a l i m b , ” h e s a id . “ B u t I h a d

p r a c tic e . M o n tr e a l se x th e ra p is t

p a tie n ts w h o w e r e d e s p e ra te ,

T o b i K l e i n d o e s n o t e n v is i o n

s o m e e v e n s u ic id a l, b e c a u s e o f

sex

th e ir i n a b ilit y to h a v e s e x u a l c o n

N o r t h A m e r ic a n m a in s tre a m

s u rro g a c y

e n te r in g

th e

in th e n e a r fu tu re .

ta c t. F o r th e m , tr e a tm e n t w a s a

“ I t c a n b e a g o o d id e a f o r

life s a v e r .”

s in g le p e o p le w h o h a v e s e rio u s

S o m m e rs n o te d a p o p u la r m is c o n c e p tio n r e g a rd in g s e x u a l s u r

i n g t h e n a t u r e o f t o u c h . W e a re

s e x u a l p r o b le m s a n d a re s h y o r

ro g a te th e ra p y , n a m e ly , th a t it c o n

b a s ic a lly e n g a g in g in r e tr a in in g th e

in h ib ite d , b u t y o u d o n ’ t w a n t to ta k e

s is ts o f a “ w i l d tim e in b e d .” B u t th e

n e rv o u s s y s te m ,” h e e x p la in e d .

i t to o f a r , ” K le in

w a rn e d . “ Y o u

tre a tm e n t m a y n o t e v e n in v o lv e

W i t h h is p r o c l a i m e d 9 0 p e r

d o n ’ t w a n t p e o p le u s in g s e x th e ra p is t s as p i m p s . . . M a k i n g lo v e is a

n u d ity , a n d is v e r y fo c u s e d . H e w a s

c e n t s u c c e s s ra te , i t s e e m s th a t

c a r e fu l to p o in t o u t th a t th e th e ra p y

S o m m e rs h a s th e r ig h t to b e c o n f i

s a c re d a c t, a n d as f a r as I ’ m c o n

d o e s n o t e m p h a s is e in te rc o u r s e , a n d

d e n t in d e fe n d in g h is th e ra p y . S in c e

c e rn e d , se x w i t h s tra n g e rs is g e n e r

d o e s n o t e v e n g o n e a r th e g e n ita ls

h e is th e o n ly p r a c titio n e r in O n ta r io

a lly

u n t i l w e l l i n t o th e c o u r s e o f th e

w h o p r e s c r ib e s t h is f o r m o f tr e a t

e n d o rs e .”

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F e a tu re s

February 11th, 1997

page i i

Are lonely scientists looking for love in all the wrong labs? c h o o s e t o l o c k t h e m s e lv e s u p i n

S c ie n c e

W a tc h

m a y n o t be so d iffe r e n t fro m

t io n .

th o s e o f th e y o u n g “ C o m p le te

to t a lly

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and

som eone w h o

lo o k in g

fo r

s h a re s a s im ila r

h e r m itu d e

s e lf - im p o s e d .

You

in v e s tm e n t

b a n k e r , th e a v i d b o o k r e a d e r , o r

th e a s p ir in g r a d io t a l k s h o w h o s t.

h a v e t o m a k e a n e f f o r t b u t th e r e

M a n y b e lie v e t h a t i t ’ s a lo n e ly

a re t im e s w h e n y o u s a y , ‘ ’ i t ’ s te n

p la n e t o u t th e re , b u t fe w

o ’ c lo c k , w h a t a m

a d m i t t o t h e i r d e c i s i o n t o le a d

I s t i l l d o in g

p a s s io n f o r R e s t r ic t io n F r a g m e n t

h e re ? ’ ”

L e n g th

M c G i l l b i o l o g y g r a d u a te s tu d e n t.

P o ly m o r p h is m s ?

th a t th e s e s c ie n t is t s ’ a c c o u n ts ,

th e la b a n d s h u n h u m a n i n t e r a c

s a id A a r o n W i n d s o r , a

w ill

s u c h l o n e l y liv e s .

H o w e v e r , o n e m u s t r e a lis e

S e a r c h in g f o r t h a t s p e c ia l s o m e o n e t o t a l k f l u i d d y n a m ic s w i t h ? T ir e d

o f

in tim a te

e v e n in g s

w i t h . . . y o u r m o u l d c u lt u r e s ? Look

m o re .

“ S c ie n c e

C o n n e c t io n ” is y o u r a n s w e r . A c c o r d in g t o a n a r t i c le i n th e J a n u a ry

13 M o n t r e a l G a z e tte ,

“ S c ie n c e C o n n e c t i o n ” i s a p e r s o n a ls a d s e r v ic e w h i c h c a te r s t o l o n e l y a n d l o v e l o r n s c ie n t is t s .

T h e s e r v ic e is r u n b y , a p t l y enough,

a n im a l b e h a v io u r ia l

b e lie v e

th a t th e

s c ie n t if ic a lly

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f a c t is

c a l l y c h a lle n g e d . A f t e r a l l , w h a t

o f t e n h a r d to f i n d a l i k e - m i n d e d

a m a tte r o f m a tin g

is a s te r e o ty p e i f th e r e i s n ’ t s o m e

p e r s o n w h o a p p r e c ia t e s th e e l e

g r a in o f t r u t h t o it ?

g a n c e o f , s a y , th e b i n o m i a l th e o

“ Y e a h , b u t th a t s te re o ty p e

“I mean, the stereotype is true to a certain extent. But then, it’s not just scientists out there looking for love.” — a McGill biochemistry student

d o e s n ’ t a p p l y t o m e ! ” s a id o n e M c G ill b io c h e m is tr y

g ra d u a te

C o n n e c tio n ”

is t r u e

s i m i l a r i n t e ll e c t u a l in t e r e s t s . F o r m a n y p e o p le e n g a g e d in

th e re

c a re e rs ,

lo v e ,”

she

fin d in g

o th e rs

B u t c o u ld i t a ls o b e t h a t th e y j u s t n e e d m o r e h e lp th a n m o s t in

s iv e s c i e n t i f i c r e s e a r c h c a n b e a F o r e x a m p le , w h e r e d o e s a m a n o r w o m a n w ith tw o P h D s ,

m a te s , a n d s ta r te d th e a g e n c y .

w o r k w h i c h r e q u ir e s l o n g h o u r s

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o f t e n w i t h l i t t l e h u m a n c o n ta c t.

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N o r t h A m e r ic a t o u t t h e i r I Q s a n d

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February 11th, 1997

Page i 2 F e a t u r e s

Life re-cycle blurs the line between the kids and the adults th e k n o t e v e n f o r th e f i r s t t i m e

s o m e th in g , th e m in iv a n , 2 .3 k id s ,

re a d th a t w o m e n a g e d 2 0 to 25

id e a ls

g r o w i n g u p is : a n o p e n b a r a t f i r s t

y e t, t h e r e ’ s s t i l l s o m e th in g

a n d L a b r a d o r R e t r ie v e r o f f u l l

c a n s t i l l in c r e a s e t h e ir b o n e d e n s i

y o u th a n d h a r m f u l s u b s ta n c e s :

w e d d in g s . B y th e t h i r d m a r r ia g e ,

a n tic ip a te .

g r o w n u p -h o o d a re n ’ t to o a ttra c

t y b y t a k in g in c a lc iu m t o p r e v e n t

T h e ‘ 5 0 s c o c k t a i l p a r t y ( g in a n d

tiv e . R e s p o n s ib ilitie s , c o m m it

o s te r e o p e r o s iS .

m o re

v e r m o u t h ) , th e ‘ 6 0 s p r o t e s t ( a c id ) ,

m i l k , ” th e a r t ic le

s a id . A t la s t,

a n d t h e ‘ 7 0 s c o k e d is c o ( d is c o ) .

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o n e g o o d th in g

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c y n i c i s m s e ts in a n d i t b e c o m e s a

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c a s h b a r. O f c o u rs e , b y th a t age

l o t o f a d v a n ta g e s t o b e c o m in g a

m e n ts —

th e t h r i l l o f d r in k i n g y o u r s e l f s i l l y

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and

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u n c o m p lic a t e d a d v ic e , s o m e t h in g

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h a s w o r n o f f a n y w a y . B u t , s in c e

r e s p o n s ib le a d u lt. C o m p a r e d to

p a y c h e q u e . T h e n g e t o ld , r e t ir e to

I c a n a c t u a l l y d o , a n d a t a n g ib le

a g e s.

m o s t o f m y fr ie n d s h a v e n ’ t tie d

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e n o u g h m o n e y w h e n y o u r e tir e .

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n o w , I ’ l l b e w a lk in g

N o w , i t ’ s m o re o f a “ r e - c y c le ” :

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a r o u n d s tr o n g a n d h e a lth y s la p

f i r s t m a r r ia g e , s e c o n d m a r r ia g e ,

s io n f u n d j u s t d o e s n ’ t k e e p m e u p

p i n g m y f r ie n d s o n th e b a c k a n d

g o b a c k t o s c h o o l f o r t h i r d d e g re e ,

a t n ig h t. H a v in g

h e a r in g t h e i r b r it t l e b o n e s s n a p in

s ta r t s e v e n th jo b . T h e e c o n o m y

n o m o n e y to

c h a n g e d , m a r r ia g e c h a n g e d , p e o

t w o u n d e r th e im p a c t.

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lo n g e r ,

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v a g u e ly l i k e s o m e th in g y o u m i g h t

M a y b e i t i s n ’ t s o a n a c h r o n is

see u s e d in a s o f t - c o r e p o r n v id e o .

tic to h a v e m u tu a l fu n d c o m p a

B o o m e rs a re n ’ t c o n te n t to “ a c t

I f o u n d s l i g h t l y m o r e h e lp f u l

n ie s m a r k e t i n g t o t w e n t y - s o m e

t h e i r a g e ” a n d s ta y h o m e i n f r o n t

a d v ic e i n a R e d b o o k a r t ic le o n “ 4 0

th in g s . Y o u n g p e o p le h a v e g o tte n

o f th e T V

T h in g s t o D o B e f o r e Y o u ’ r e 4 0 . ”

o l d f o r t h e i r a g e , a n d o l d p e o p le

p le u s e d t o d o .

T h is w a s n o t “ th in g s t o d o ” as in ,

h a v e g o tte n y o u n g . W i t h a e r o b ic s

M a y b e s tu d e n ts a lr e a d y a re

t r y p a r a c h u t in g , le a r n t o ta n g o , o r

a n d f a c e lif t s a n d “ c a s u a l o f f ic e

g r o w n u p s , a n d I ’ m j u s t i n d e n ia l .

c lim b

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M o u n t K ilim a n ja r o . T h is

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w a s “ th in g s to d o ” as in , s ta r t

g r o w n u p s a n y m o r e ; th e y l o o k l i k e

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u s in g

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w r i n k l e s . I f y o u w a n t c h ild r e n , d o

m y c u r r e n t a g e . B u t th e n

I ’ v e b e e n s a y in g t h a t f o r a t le a s t

i t s o o n . S to c k u p y o u r k id s ’ c o l

e d o u r p a r a d ig m

w ild

te n y e a r s . A t le a s t I s t i l l h a v e

le g e f u n d . E x c u s e m e ? I ’ m s t i l l

n ig h t o u t in th e ‘ 9 0 s m e a n s tw o

w e d d in g s a n d o p e n b a r s t o l o o k

w o r k i n g o n m y o w n c o lle g e fu n d .

d o u b le e s p re s s o s a t th e c o f f e e

fo r w a r d to , a n d s u p e r io r b o n e s

A n d I c a n ’ t r e la te t o w o r r ie s a b o u t

h o u s e , so th a t y o u ca n s till g e t u p

w h e n I f i n a l l y c a s h in m y R R S P s .

th e t i c k i n g o f m y b i o l o g i c a l c lo c k .

e a r ly th e n e x t m o r n in g f o r s c h o o l,

I w a s e x c ite d , h o w e v e r , to

w o r k , o r s h u f f le b o a r d . R e c r e a tio n

“ g r o w n u p .”

g o a l. Y e a h , I c a n see i t n o w . F i f t y

o f fu n . A

M s.

P e te r s ' in n e r d e m o n s

h a v e b e a te n u p h e r i n n e r c h ild .

____________________________________________

The Tribune would like to wish each and every one of our darling readers the most wonderful, luvin’, Valentine’s Day ever.

b e tw e e n

y o u o n is w h e t h e r y o u ’ l l h a v e

in v e s t , “ s to c k s a n d b o n d s ” s o u n d

20% OFF

no any

b e in g a “ k i d ” a n d

Susan Peters

a t m id d le - a g e d b a b y b o o m e r s .

A Valentine's

m o re

Black Coffee

F e a rs o f g r o w i n g u p a r e n ’ t

lin e

At Touro, we believe it's critical to teach students to compete in a challenging environment—yet maintain the highest standards of civility and ethical conduct. W e place great importance on preparing students to enter the working world as professionals O ur faculty is devoted to excellence in teaching and to the acquisition of effective communication skills. Extensive clinical, internship, and externship

1 \m

programs afford students the opportunity to acquire valuable real-world experience— bridging the gap between theory and practice. Touro's unique student-centered model supports a rigorous legal education in an atmosphere of mutual respect, cooperation, and collaboration. For more information, call us or visit our website. After all, nobody helps students get hands-on experience better than Touro.

PROGRAMS INCLUDE: JURIS DOCTOR (J.D.) DEGREE •MASTER OF LAWS (LUA) FOR FOREIGN LAWYERS •FULL/PART-TIME. DAY/EVENING CLASSES •SUMMER INTERNSHIPS AND PROGRAMS ABROAD

300 Nassau Road • Huntington, Long Island, NV 11743 * 516-421-2244 Ext. 312 • 516-421-2675 fax http://www.tourolaw.edu • TDD/TTY: 516-421-0476

Ç \Y akn tin es 1 Y ^ R a ch e l S. PO K E! **Lia, Lam b ast! Lam bast! La m b a st me! Y o u r loving M asochist W e a t h e r A le rso n , I want you. No, wait!! Y ou want m e!! Love R ich a rd 101 W e a t h e r -d a n s tes b eau x yeux verts, je peux voir P a ris. Je v e u x connaitre toi m ieux. I’ll be w atching and loving you. X W a u l S la ch ta . Felicitations, P e p si. T h a n k you for being o verall a d god. lizlau

Riz W a n im , you K N O W yo u’re m y favourite darkroom sla ve b e c a u s e ...I’m good... **Suzy, M eg, Z a r a T h e perfect m e n a g e -a -tro is.O o h W y la , a re those R E A L L Y your b re a s ts ?! R. ^ D e a r e s t C a ro ly n Th o m p so n . I love you I k is s you I hug you. H ap p y V -d a y . Y o u r hum ble Jo Jo rep lacem ent a k a Mz. S co rp W o h n B arleyco rn , Y ou M A K E m y life go round on the ol’ chorale.

W o m y triple S agittarius, W a n n a get our Ju p iters togeth e r ? Y o u r qu ad rup le S co rp io

* * S a m m y,W h e re is m y m odu la to r?? Love Melvin the M artian P S Boob ie w alk m e hom e so m e time

W / ly tum m y w ish e s all yo u s H ap p y V -d a y s .

W o n y -b o y , yo u’ve got jam betw een you legs.

W o m y d e are st Alley-frien dly, Sm artie -e atin g com p an ion I love you I kiss you I hug you. Y o u m a y h a ve a tight a s s & are quite “B rutish”, but y e r su g a r sw eet to m e a n yw a y. X ’s & O ’s T h e Pedo p hile

* * S J G , I’ll set your aperature a n yd a y. R R . T h a n k s .

**Alex: stop following m e > you ju st c a n ’t m ake it up to m e for the syn cro fiasco. P C

^ D e a r e s t N icole & S e a n , I love you both but y a gotta S T O P laughing at m e. E v e r Y o u rs, R a c h e l :P

**H ey S tike m an , A re you still rippin’ R o n ? !? ! v D e a r e s t Lian d erth al.M ay you be b le sse d by the “get laid” fairy. H a v e a se x x x y x-rated V a le n tin e ’s with the one you lu st...T h e Forgein Bitch & Gw en W a r e e m : H ap p y birthday w anker.Forget yo u r girlfriend. Let’s go get drunk. -J. **Mr. D e lish ,W h a t’s your n a m e ? W ho are y o u ? I need to know! **Don: “C le a n h a n d s a re better than full o n e s,” acco rd in g to a Latin proverb. But yo u ’re still an ub e rm e n sch to m e. -D . **D ear S h aw n , E v e an d Mike: (M olly, too, but s h e ’s not guilty). Y o u still ow e m e B IG . -J W a n d y : If you a re reading this, I hope it w a s m e you w ere looking for. H ap p y V a le n tin e s d a y and let this b e a start to som ething bigger, (if you were looking for so m e o n e e lse , ignore this an d read on...) P C W e t t y -b o o I love you, Feature C re atu re let’s w alk our “d aw g s” an d write e s s a y s on ad re n alin e pills. R a c h e the M artian **Alex. L a -la -la , your little sh o u ld e rs and p e cu lia r w addle a re e n ch a n tin g .T h a n ks, for m ore than you know, love, rizrau. A n d stop poking me. W - A n y a B a k e s ’m ore brown ies! X ’s & O ’s from a H um ble H u n g ry Photo Editor W a t h le e n Fre d e rickso n W H E R E A R E Y O U ? luv R a c h e l & Allegro W o h n P. M m m ... N IC E ! J. W o K u n g -fu ’s ve ry own v a n ishin g dotter(!), let’s tell HIM, “D O O O N ’T touch m y breast, I’m ju st sitting on yo ur b e d ...!”

** I will never le a ve the c re a ture who sm e lls right — b e it slu g, cat, b e a r or otherw ise. W ill you be m y V a le n tin e ?

**R iz R iz R iz ...I love you, you a re m y m ask in g tape god! H u g s n’ K is s e s 1 of 2 H um ble Photo Editors **LB, H e re ’s to caffeine, nico tine & Tarot card readings. W h o ’s going to be the F I R S T rejection of the night this time a ro u n d ?! R O

**Betty “Fre n ch fry” W a ss e rm a n . S k ip p y ? S k ip p y ? H a n d s off, skippy.

^R eb ecca, C a tc h in g .. .K a -C h in g ? W h a t's the diff? T h a n k s for yer help ...Lo ve, R a c h e l & A aron

**Kevin K., J a n e , W illiam , L e slie & all the a w e so m e pho tograp hers that we a re m issing, w e love you an d we kiss yo u...thanx for stayin g despite our n e u ro sis! Love R a c h e l & Aaron **Bill Lew is, rem em b er m e a s a starving artist w hen you open up yo ur restaurant...I’ll bring the Asti. Lo ve yo ur not-quite se cre t adm irer

**M arcus, M arcus, M arcus...I am still nam in g m y first born after you W r a n k : yo u ’re m y hero. P C

**l often m ake no se n s e , but, D a ve , get help. Lo ve, A S .

**N oah et B enji, the love is sim p ly d azz lin g . S a m **Noah, yo u ch e w yo u r food funny. I noticed. Love, S a m **Benji, s e e you in the B ig A p p le (literally). Lo ve, S a m

W o the pretty red headed girt in m y d ram a c la s s : H i, yo u ’re pretty. **Keith, I dig yo ur am biguity. D ave »*M R, O u r initials are carve d in a sid e w a lk in Toronto. I think that’s a good sign . J L . W o the C o stu m in g c la s s peo ple: I love you with the burning intensity of a thousand su n s. D a ve W o m y landlord: Drop dead you fucking creep . W a u l S la ch ta is a god am ong m en. D a ve , w ho’s writing too m any. * * G e n e se e , w hile it's true that fruit is evil b e c a u se it h a s su g a r (horrors!), it’s a lso got those nifty a n ti-scu rv y agents. D a ve .

W o y c e : yo u ’re the official trib p u sh o ve r/h o n e yb e ar an d we all love you. T h a n k s for not hating u s. A S .

W z la u . C o o l n am e . All hail the chief. A S . **Babette, U n e am itié, c a d e m a n d e d e s efforts/ d a n s notre vie il y a b e a u co u p de portes/ m aintenant, tu e s mon a m ie / et c ’est très b o n s pour ‘m e’. W it c h , we a re either com plete b a stard s or utter dolts. S in c e this is not m uch of a n option, our only a n sw e r is to throw our h a n d s up in d e sp air, love, your one and only girlfren’. **H appy lovely V a le n tin e ’s d ay to all! fuckers. W r a n k ie & P a u l: S p o rts is the b an e of m y e x is te n c e .,:P P P * A n y a h , W e L A H V E you!!! O n g & M ysterious La m b * * S a ra Je a n , it is a d vise d that you stop w alking into m en’s w ash room s. Y o u ’re frightening Frank.

Rachel O ng

Dee **D ee, four y e a rs of freaki n e ss...L o v e , S a m

W e a c h e s (Betty), we suffer together, but oh the fun! Love, Sam m y

W r a n k ie Fran klin , yo u ’re a hom e boy with good sm ell. Love, S a m

**Alex M., feature creatu res w orship the ground you w alk on. W e love you, w e will build a shrine.

**Ong, go get a bong, or a thong - no, that w ould be w ro n g ...k isse s, love, S a m

**Alex S ., this o n e s for you b a b y...aaarrrg g g gh h h h , m e o w ? Love, S a m

W y la , lyla, w e h a ve the s a m e breast siz e . (An on ym ous)

**B u sh nell, yo u ’re su ch a hoot. Lo ve, S a m

W y la , Lyla, I love you Lyla , so m uch that I think I’m go nna h a ve a n em otional b re ak d o w n ...S am .

**R adler, w hich is it g o n n a be, new s or features, featu res or n e w s ? ? ? ? T h a n x for all yo ur help (kisse s!)

W i z Lau, I L O V E yo ur nose. Sam

**Kathleen Fre d e rickso n . I m is s you, S illyfa ce , w herever you are. Lo ve, N yan ya .

**Alex B: V a le n tin e ’s love m a s s a g e from afar...w ut’s u p ? love L e s **M arlisa, la la la d um best girl in the world (me, not you). Let’s go skating. **A m ynah P ra d h a n / G o d e s s in brown ace tate / C h o co -g o w n of love

**D ave, H o u se yourself. P a ul ^ W ith o u t R a e , life w ould just be, so not D e lish . I'd h a ve n ever known a B rujah from a m odulator, nor the m ean in g of the word ‘san g w ich ’. Love, Sam !

W a c h e l S : My editing in sp ira tion. W h en I grow up I want to be just like you. A S .

W > J G . Y o u ’re sw eet, new s g o d d e ss. I p rom ise I’ll write an editorial soon. A S .

W o y c e : Thank you S O m uch for putting up with m e and m y section all y e a r and sm ilin g about it. P a ul

**Betty, you so cra zy! W e love you!

W o the S criv e n e r staff, H e re ’s to galactic talk, coffee & c ig a rettes. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D ay. Lo ve T h e two T rib -a b se n te e s

**My life is incredibly em pty. I resent yo ur h a p p in e ss. I feel exclud ed from yo u r world of “love”. D ave .

W o eve ryo n e I’ve e v e r gone out with (or som ething): I’m really really sorry. D avid Bushn ell

**A nya, I love you for m ore than yo ur go o d-g o od -g oo d ies. M ay the “Art of Liste n in g s” of life a p p e a r m ore often. R iz

** S a m , W aterloo aw aits. T h e y ’re scare d . I’m scare d , but m ostly b e c a u se of Betty, love an d thanks, R iz

* * S h le e sa Filochon! W e w ish you H ap p y V D a y on behalf of yo ur harem ** ‘W e all love yo u,” they s a id with lust. A n d so do yo ur room ies. Lo ve, S a m &

**M arc: Y o u s q u e e z e ch ick e n s !...S o lid ? W hatever. A S . **Noah, he s q u e e z e s ch ick e n s! A n d you write weird V a le n tin e s. W e -e lll, yo u ’re still O K by me. AS.

**H ey O n g , all of a su d d e n l feel really ick y...B u sh n e ll

** Aaron, even though yo u rs is the only photo in fo cu s this w eek, w e’re not usin g it. Sorry!

**H ey Stokoe! My D u M aurier’s collector’s tin is N O T looking T H A T w eathered! O ng

** N o ah an d B enji: Y o u know it’s 100 % true love. H a v e fun in N iag a ra . R iz

an d dreary. A S .

W o y c e is short, but s o am I, an d I like her. (S am )

»*H ey B ush n e ll, I d are you to S m e ll M y In n a rds...O n g

W r i k a F. people tell m e yo u ’re neurotic, but I s a y it’s part of yo ur charm . H ap p y V -D a y . Y o u r Mudgirl com panion

** S a ra h an d Eric, m ay the upcom ing y e a rs of your m ar riage be a s h ap p y a s the first!

**D .H ., m y best boy buddy, you inspire m e to love (and m ake g o u lY a sh ). H ap p y V D a y, you p e sto -crazy retro baby. Love a lw a y s ,.S a m m y

W o y c e La u is short in height but hu ge in beauty.

^ H a r r is N., the H arris e n ig m a w a s ruined for m e the d a y you let m e s e e yo ur belt. R iz

** P a u l, what about the rest of us?

W o everyo ne sitting within a m e te r-rad ius of m e up at the front in 1 17 - 2 3 0 D, H a v e a great V a le n tin e ’s D a y filled with lotsa chocolate hearts. X ’s & O ’s, R a c h e l

**A nya, you m ake good brown ie s (you’re the m om m a of the fam ily) Lo ve, S a m m y

h ad nothing left to talk about), s q u is h -le s

W c o t t ie a k a Brother C o o l, I think I love you, do you want to go out for a b e e r? Love R a ch e l

W a s o n the Bovin e, I never knew you w ere this bizarre...

V R o b -a -r o o , throw aw ay the n e u ro sis and give her a call. Ja c k .

**M arc, T h o s e T V T im e s - I’ll keep yo u com ing b a c k for m ore, love R iz

**S h a n e ! I want you to live for ever! I want you to learn how to fly! U **(Dew it to m e, Supertal) W i z — (guh) die toe lam ! die toe ja m ! (and you thought we

W e a t u r e s : P e d o p h ile s for V a le n tin e s D a y ?...T h a t’s ju st stran ge. W h at a re you doing for E a s te r ? A S .

**Ooooh Lia, good sc o re ..,’cept I w ish I h a d n ’t b een at your p lace at that point. I dunno, there’s som ethin about writing about C o n fu cia n ism an d im ag ining “the other room ” that just d o e sn ’t fit...lotsa love, R a ch e l ^ K M L . T h e M ach in e R o o m ? M ayb e som etim e. How about a b e a c h ? L o ve ya 1x 1(TTi. N. * *Sam m y, Y o u ’re m y favourite V a m p ire ! Bite m e!! Lo ve, R a e beb e W o y c ie ...y e r m y favourite bu n dle of jo y X ’s & O ’s, O ng W i l l . Y o u a re m y bestest friend an d s e x y lover. I love yo ur filbert-nipple so don’t rip it off. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s # 4 , from your best girl Al. **Neil Y o u n g , Y o u are m y rock god. Sorry, N ick. R iz R a u **Aaron, I s ’p o se I sh o uld write you one too just c u z y e r m y co. W ell, here it is. **H ey M arcus, w hat do you think about M arc & G illia n ? **Ok J a m e s , yo u ’re not like m y little brother, yo u ’re definitely not m y little brother..,R

W 3a m m a P hi: ‘W e d ie a s often a s w e lo se a friend.” It’s all good, s e e you at the Pink. Lo ve in P iK E , A S .

^ J a m e s , d on’t w orry about those S T D test results, we ca n sort everthing out on M onday. Dr. W illia m s

W o m y incredibly hot boyfriend. Hot, Hot, Hot, My G o d , yo u ’re h an d so m e . I love you.

^ L iz L a u . It’s b een a w hile, e h ? But your p a p e r rocks, e s p e c ia l ly the front page. M ay you live a long an d prosp erou s life.

W a s o n , m y favourite network fascist. W ithout you: no w eb site, no B ro ck P re ss, no ch a rm ...T h e T rib would be dull

* *S a ra Je a n , Y e s , it w a s truly unfortunate that I knew the o c cu ra n ce s of the other

N e e d s A

i t

Many positions <ome with an honorarium. Nominations are now open for the following positions: E

l e

i o

A ll p o s itio n s a r e o p e n to a n y

ik C h ie f R e t u r n in g O f f ic e r

E le c tio n s C o o r d in a to r s (2 ) P

l i c

i o

T r ib u n e E d ito r -in -C h ie f

O l d M c G ill ' 9 7 E d i t o r - i n - C h i e f

R e d H e r r in g E d ito r -in -C h ie f

S S M U H a n d b o o k C o o r d in a to r (s ) T e le p h o n e D ir e c to r y C o o r d in a to r s (2 )

M c G i l l s t u d e n t . T h e r e is n o r e s tr ic tio n s o n w h o c a n a p p ly , o r w h a t b a c k g r o u n d y o u m u s t h a v e , o r w h e th e r a n y p o s i t i o n is t o b e a s s u m e d b y a s in g le p e r s o n o r b y a te a m . W h ile e x p e r i e n c e is a n a s s e t f o r m a n y p o s itio n s , e n th u s ia s m is h e l d in e q u a l l y h i g h

i v

i t

i e

S e p te m b e r F ro sh P r o g r a m C o o r d in a to r s (2 ) i

J a n u a r y F ro sh P r o g r a m C o o r d in a to r s (2 )

★

W e lc o m e W e e k C o o r d in a to r s

W in te r C a r n iv a l C o o r d in a to r (s )

B lo o d D riv e C o o r d in a t o r s (2 )

C u ltu r e fe s t C o o r d in a to r (s )

★

A c tiv itie s & C lu b s N ig h t C o o r d in a t o r s (2 ) U se d T e x tb o o k E x c h a n g e C o o r d in a to r (s )

★

E x a m / T e st B a n k C o o r d in a to r

O p e n A ir P u b C o o r d i n a t o r s ( 5 )

★

F ir s t-Y e a r E x p e r ie n c e C o o r d in a to r

C lu b s F in a n c e C o m m is s io n e r S a d ie s T a b a g ie M a n a g e r (s )

r e g a r d b y th e s e le c tio n c o m m itte e . D e s c r ip tio n s a n d a p p lic a tio n s f o r e a c h p o s itio n c a n b e p ic k e d u p a t th e S S M U f r o n t c o u n t e r in t h e W i l l i a m S h a tn e r U n iv e r s ity C e n tr e . F o r m o r e in fo r m a tio n , p le a s e v is it h t t p : //s s m u .m c g ill.c a / o r c o n ta c t M a r k F e ld m a n , V ic e -P r e s id e n t (In te r n a l) a t 3 9 8 - 6 7 9 9

in te r n a l@ s tu s o c .m c g ill.c a .

The deadline for applications is Wednesday, March 5, 1997

room ...O ng " J a m e s : m y a d s a re bet ter..,’nuff said . R e u b e n " A a r o n “W onderw ood” C h a s e . I think I sho uld stop right here. R iz v P a u l & M arc & S u s a n . Y ou g u y s a re cool room m ates, but find the dam n clicker. V S a r a h Eli. H ope y e r d oin’ well. M erry V D a y, with lots of cho colate an d o ran g e s. «AJ: I think yo u ’re so cute but I c a n ’t tell you. S . ^ R e b e c c a M ich ae ls. Y ou d e se rve a V a le n tin e , so h e re ’s yours. V cb ra d le yfo d o r: th a n ks for everything, e s p e c ia lly teaching m e to sew an d em ascu latin g m e. D B . v T h a n k you, D on, for not being S tev e . B u sh n e ll.

» L y l a : P le a s e w on’t yo u p o se naked with m e ? Let’s be d yn a m ic together, xoxo A lex

other o b se ssio n s. A S .

^ A s h b u r y ! Q uit peeing on the floor! G e t the hell out of m y room. -L o v e , J.

» M a r c ...M a y your slip p e rs keep you w arm and m ay you a lw a y s h a v e tim e for yo ur e g g s. I love yo u ...Y o u r le ss resp o n sib le C o .

" N e u r o n : T e d d y B ear, Hoo Hoo, & I a g re e : yo u ’ve got A M A Z IN G lips. -B o v in e

^ D re a m b o a t “U b e rm e n sch ” M cG o w an , I ado re yo ur strong sh o u ld e rs. A rch ie Ju n g

" C h r is t ia n e , I w ish you w ere still m ounting m y S yq u e st, P riscilla

v j . G . H ap p y V -D a y to the s e c ond best C ra d le robber I know! M.J.

v s t o k o e , it’s the bra that counts, love, R iz. S top looking at them . A n d thanks.

^ B é b é , I d on ’t e v e r w ant to le a ve the land of blueberry w ine pools, Fred A staire m ovies, an d incredible se x. R e m e m b e r, it d o e s n ’t matter w here you are, on ly who yo u ’re with.

" A d a m . O ffe n sive or not, keep putting all yo ur ca rd s on the table. (At the ve ry least, it a lw a y s ke e p s m e laughing.) Ja so n . " M o e : M ahal Kita, you c ra z y Eg yp tian !! Fr. a c ra z y Filipina. Love Lots, Li.

v Nat, A n n ab e lle, L is a and D eb : E v e n though yo u still keep putting your food on m y shelf in the fridge, yo u ’re alright with m e. Y o u r only m ale room m ate, J.

» D e a r all m y ex -frie n d s, w hy did you all ditch m e ? T h a n k s for ruining m y life. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. - Benji

* * D e a r Mr. D e lish , O N E D A Y , we will met. Love, yo ur secret adm irer. ^ S p id e y . H ope yo ur P eter P a rk e r is happ y on V a le n tin e s. Love S is te r P u ssy . ^ J o s e p h in e : T u m e g usta s. Mi n ariz no e sta rota. H a sta luego. Jo ta (ed. accompanying stick-per

son graphic could not be repro duced.) v R e g in a . “C o m e an d knock at m y door, I’v e b een waiting for yo u.” O k a y , it’s not T h re e ’s C o m p a n y , but I’m still looking forward to next year. -J a s o n

* V E R B A L , H ap p y V -D a y ! C o m e sin g “S tra n g e rs in the Night” 4 m e. xoxo, B O B O v A m y n a h , O ooh, there’s a

Alm ond T e a an d you. O n e ia h

* * D e a r Liz, T h a n k you for dragging m e from that terrible fire an d sa v in g m y life. O h...w ait a m inute....that w a sn ’t you. W ell, H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y all the s a m e . - Benji *^To ‘leem ster. I love you, part ner in va rio u s crim es. I am , a lw a y s and truly, yo ur siste r in P iK E ...A n y a « JS h a n e r, N e rvo u s laughter m a k e s the world go “U G H !” R iz R a u , better known a s your Phone S a s s G o dd ess D e a r M arc, It’s been a real p le asu re getting along fam o u s

* * Betty-boo: W h o a re y o u ? I need to know w ho you are! Are yo u B ob R o s s ? «^ R ach e l O . » O h I w ish I w a s an O s c a r M eyer w einer. T h a t is what I’d really like to be. ‘C a u s e if I w as a n O s c a r M eyer w einer, I’d h a ve so m e o n e to go out with on V a le n tin e ’s d ay. ^ R a c h e l O . > D o n ’t hate m e ju st b e c a u se I’m the bain of yo ur e x istan ce ... P C ** T iso y, Ishii, & C a b ro n . My bros, I luv u g u ys, eve n if u got rid of m y turtle. -L i ^ T o C h a n ta le ,T h o u g h ts of you w arm m y heart/O n th e se cold winter nights;/m elting a w ay the long tedious d ays/until thoughts b eco m e re al.Lo ve S h a w n ^ R e u b e n , It’s been a y e a r s in c e w e’ve done 69 s togethe r - l still re m em b er...M acP o ulet

* F a is a l & A o u s: H e y D rips! H ap p y Love! Let’s go 4 so up . Liza.

* f .*■ f

f #..#.♦

^ M a r c u s : who yo u calling ch e a p an d taw d ry? A S v D a ve : to m y favourite stray streetkid from Je rse y . H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s d ay, frat-o-phile. B enji o jo y c e . F le e to m e, remote elf. (not so random , if you read it b ackw ards) P e a c h e s ^ S a r a Je a n . I couldn't love you m ore, excep t m ayb e if you had a hyphen in yo ur nam e, bettee

o B enji. N o wet n a p s in the office. **Dom , you h a ve nice yellow so ck s. R R v F u n B obby, and Kate, C a n I be yo ur V a le n tin e Lo ve C h ild ? Step h

«AJam es, if anyth in g in this life is certain, if history h a s taught u s anything, it’s that aubu rn is not yo ur colour. Lu v Sn o o p

^ T h a n k s to C a ty a an d T rish for taking m e in, feeding m e an d letting m e w atch taped e p iso d e s of the F ile s. S a ra

^ S a m , yo u ’re the best. I’ll m ake you co o k ie s anytim e. A S

«AJoyce, so rry for m akin g you so sm all. D a ve , w ell... I'm not so rry for anything. N G .

» T o C h ristian e , the on ly girl with two m en an d a broken heart., p e rh ap s the nu nnery w ouldn’t be so b a d .J m iss Production D a y s . L u v your Muffin.

v C a r i a and E le a n o r: Y o u ’re the best. L u v S J

" H a p p y V -d a y to m y one and only true love. I love the sw eet jo y s you bring to m y life, Lau ra S . Fo re ve r yours, P a u l.

V s T A L Iio n , OW W Ü M y...floa...ting...rib...! love, riz

^ S p ik e , S tev e , M ailan: get so m e rest. T h e sh o w looks good already.

^ R a c h e l, you a re m y #1 sooth sa y e r. Luv, A rie s m an.

e s

^ N o a h , e ve ry d a y is like a full m oon w hen you are near, the girl with m a n y n a m e s.

^ F r a n k ie , you s a u c y w ench, I dig yo ur briefs. D B

v L iz , I ca n do 69 corrections, re ally I c a n ...lo o k ...I-N -Q -U -I-R Y l. A d guy.

t in

you “h a v e fun”! xo " M .J .

**Paul C o n n e r, I like you. T h a t’s w hy I’m going to kill you last.

*AJoyce, yo u r affection for sm all furry a n im a ls is killing you. M aybe you sh o uld invest in one of those indoor a ir bub ble kits. T h a n k s for a great night. Production P re d e ce s s o r

e n

» O h S u s a n n a h , d on’t you cry for m e. E v e n though you m erci le s s ly d um ped m e for a younger, co oler guy. C o ld h e arte d w ench. Jo s e

Y o u b y a n y o t h e r n a m e w o u l d s m e ll a s s w e e t.

^ K a r e e m S . H ap p y V -D a y ! H ap p y B -d a y ! C a re fu l of m en in white coats. L iz a P. «* Th e G e rt’s crow d (Andrew , K .S ., B .L ., J, etc). H ap p y V d ay! Lo ve, L.P . ^ M e la n ie . G e e ... nice work m akin g our C d n S tu d ie s nights out se e m o h -s o -s c a n d a lo u s to the outside world. (En o ug h said .) H ap p y V -d a y ! -J a s o n ^ S n o w b u n n y , Snow bun ny. Little punkin, little spoon. M arsupial. H ap p y V -D a y . " P a r a n o id O b scurity G u y : Y ou care so m uch it hurts, allo vu s ''E n te rta in m e n t W riters: M ay your V -D a y be wild an d p a s sion ate and cra zy, ju st like yo ur stories. Love, Y o u r Editors. " T o La m b d a C h i. W e love you. S o rry our m ixers suck. Love, you know who. " E rik a Sturzen b erger: T h a n k s for the colum n babe. M arc “I h a ve no tribunal” G illiam .

*»Alex M athias, A h lick s m y thighs, A h licks m ah tight a s s .love your A lley-frien dly com p an ion v T o C a ro ly n -s in g le se x h ighscho ol g o e rs an d R V C su r vivo rs sho uld have happ y V a le n tin e s. Let’s, xoxo, Alex

* N ick R ., H e y P U N K ! M etallica know s you care , love liz S .H ., I m ust co n fe ss that m y burning love for you h a s been tem pered by peroxide blonde in the A lley. I love yo ur naughty w a ys no netheless. - J .S . o Leopold, I dem onstrate m y love for thee by joining your co n dem n ed w a ys. I h a ve been drinking h e a vily waiting for you to let m e in. - Franklin » C . W . H a v e a ve ry “nitrous” V a le n tin e ’s d a y (I m e an nice)! M .J. se xy. S e cre t Adm irer. ^ S .F . I think I’m ju st going to go hom e instead. - J .P .

* J a m e s of the once chestnut hair. Y o u ’re the office stallion, riz **Alex, stop following m e! And ge e z, you ca n co m e up with som ething better than “I w a s looking up m a p s.” P C ^ T o m y m ore resp o n sib le half: thanks, oh entertainm ent dad! Lots of lu ck with C y b il and B ruce an d T im an d all your t 1 •«.# *•*..« U K M t.

»* Sa m & Betty. Y o u are 2 rock ing c h ick s. Love A lex, the girl on the freaky beat. v S A IM o n E L L A , Y o u a re 2 rot ting e g g s. Lo ve R iz , the girl on the top. ^ D e a r S te v e , w e’re all going down from here, boy. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. - Benji

A aron Chase

floating rib in you ch o co fon due. R iz v D e a r A aro n, so rry about all those dam n stupid photo ide as. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y . - Benji v D e a r R a ch e l, those stupid photo id e a s are N o a h ’s fault. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. - Benji ^ B o v in e J a s o n , G o o d thing I’m not veg etarian , love riz v D e a r Betty. I dream of you carvin g up the ice on figure ska te s. T o o bad you h a ve so m uch trouble just w alking on ice. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. Benji v D e a r R a c h e l. Y o u are S p a chel. H ope you h a v e a Moist an d D e lish V a le n tin e s. Lo ve Al. v Fo reig n o n e ...M a y V a le n tin e s bring you e n d le ss hot m en an d w hips an d ch a in s. B e happ y, another D e lish is around the corner. A S . » D e a r S a g u y , we a re pathet ic. N o ...n o ...w e are not. P eo p le like us. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D ay. - Benji » D e a r S a m , c a n F rid a y nights be this m uch fun at C o lu m b ia ? H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. - Benji D e a r J a z z y Jo y c e , thank you for s a v in g m y life on the o c c a sio n al [every single] M onday. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y . - Benji » S e v re r: T h e s e R the things I luv -S u n flo w e rs, Tu rtles,

ly. T im Horton’s is for the un em p loyed and toothless. B enji ^ C u t e Lu he. Am idst the b rack en an d the bursh lie s your flower pow er child. Stop and m unch, on m y nature’s crunch. ^ H e a t h e r (V P Revolution). S ta te s’ rights or province build ing, w hatever you want to call it, good effort. v Je n O lso n , S o rry I h a ve n ’t called ; but know that I’m think ing of you. H ap p y V -D a y . I love you I k is s you I hug you. R a ch e l v N oah, without you, I would m ost certainly be going down for the count. W ait a m in ute....I’m a lre a d y dead. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y a n y w ay. - B enji v R K . H oly Sh itb alls, I’m losing count of how m an y m en are in love with you, but don't forget that I’m the one that lo ves you the m ost: F e lic e giom o per il S a n V alentino , M .J. " D a v e , you a re a great la y [out]. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. B enji " D e a r Liz, H ap p y V ale n tin e 's D a y, Jo y c e ! - B enji " H a p p y “fucking” V a le n tin e ’s d a y S o lo ! Y o u dont know what yo u ’re m issin g ... by not sw e ar ing yo u dirty! p.s. H a v e a “co ol” V a le n tin e ’s d a y freak! H ope

v L iz , stop writing m e s s a g e s to yourself. R S «*Fu ck, A n ya , Im a is a m ucho better nam e! R R ^ T o all the Trib staff m em bers, there’s m ore to being a sc ie n c e student than carryin g around a godd am m m e ch an ica l pencil an d an e ra se r! »*To all co u n cillo rs w earing tight pants. 1 ) they c a n ’t be good for you, 2 ) it s u c k s for us people in the gallery. «^D earest H -le a th e r lover, H ope you h a ve a great V a le n tin e ’s d ay; I still h a ve m y tea bag! Y o u r Kindred Spirit ^ L a u r a M acN eil. Y o u r mitts go up to yo ur elbow s. How m uch m ore sp e c ia l c a n you g e t? R iz v C a r : I want to give you the “C h o p stic k s” P S you owe m e a twenty Love, Bob v K e it h , you ca n redecorate o ur living room anytim e. Liz ^ M a r k y M arc, e ve n though yo ur fruit is petite, yo ur granola b ars win m e over. R S * T O AM Y KAPYRKA, I R EA L L Y D O N ’T C A R E IF Y O U H A V E A G U Y A L R E A D Y . 15 IN C H E S , D O T H E M A T H . T h e Lover » T o the Lone B aron, I can hardly wait for our next m oun tain su n se t...L o ve , the G u e lp h G odd ess. v O h D a ve , Y o u know you like m y boots, you m aso ch ist. Lots

7a k n

C F of tough luvin, R a c h e l a k a your hum b le sad ist v O r ly , T h e m oom is out. Love Yea v S y l , D esp ite what you m ay think, yo ur siste rs h a ve not for gotten you. W e m iss you. W e love you. In P iK E , the G a m m a P h is. v j o y c e is short. But kinda cute. v D e a r Q u e e n Je g E lsk erd e g A h h Y o u rs. v jo a n n e , our dayte is com ing up. L iz L a u v R e u b e n , d esp ite w hat you m ight think, every one of the ho ro sko p s is about you V M a r c , your ap p le fe e ls su p e rior to yo ur e g g s. v B e n ji, yo u ’re lingu istically atyp ical. M arc V M a r c , yo u ’re lingu istically indiscrim inate. R iz

brow nies, an d that’s ju st a s good. N G . V T o L a u r a -Y e s I could live without you, but w hat reason would there be then for liv in g ? S o p le a s e be m y V alentine, Bucky B eaver v c ia o isa b e lla ooohh vin o ...caro burratino V H e y R e d Berry, How m uch are you sellin g the k id s fo r? Dom inatrix v F r a n k lin , I o n ce s a w you vom it spaghetti. A n d who would have thought, on that spaghetti strewn night, w e’d both be editors one d a y ? N G v P a u l, I h a ve to adm it I’m not a sports fan. But I a m yo ur fan! NG v B e t t y , P e a c h e s , E lla , Bob R o ss , your m an y n a m e s le a ve m e b reath less. W ell, m ore like out of breath. N G v S a m , you o n ce laughed at m e for h aving snot in m y nose. But I’m o ka y with that. N G

V T o A lex, the s c ie n c e ed. extraordinaire, you m ay not be the scorp io who I write about but yo u ’s still p e a c h y keen! v L a u r a . Y o u m ust rem em ber this, a k is s is but a kiss. D o n ’t let too m uch tim e go by. R alph

v P a ll K onner. O o p s. S p e lle d yo u r n am e w rong. T h a n k s for everything, rizrau

v D e a r Jo lly R a n ch e r, Let’s get wet n'wild in D ayton a. S h a m u

v ja n e , e ye out the g uy the last

v S a r a , yo u ’re beautiful, yo u ’re sm art, I’d like to a s k you out but y o u ’re so right-wing. P le a s e read the Trib for o n ce -In love

this tim e they still look so m uch in love. W e did well!! S ig n in g off, C o n g e ste d -N o se

v F o x y F o x y Fo x y Fox m y heart a c h e s for you. W h at have they don e to yo ur fa c e ?

V M in i Muffin S h in in g bright, S h a d o w s strong...After break fast. Y o u ’re the 1 for m e -Y o u ’re m y density. Love T o u g h g u y

e s

v L a d y G o d iv a an d vintage green c h e v y guy, without your bright pictures m y world (and m y section) would la c k lustre. C o u ld I visit the darkroom one day? NG

v M a y ‘T u rk e y ” an d ‘T h e N e ck” live in harm o ny forever. H ap p y V -D a y to the rice ca ke s!

for m e, m illions of P e a c h e s , P e a c h e s for fre e -L O O K O U T ...O n g

v S a r B e a r , G iv e our re g ards to your grandm other. Brim + M T v G itte r m a n , G litterm an, or sh a ll I s a y P ris c illa ? Btw, do you know w hose b re asts those w e re ? L a d y G o d iv a /G e o rg e M ichel (duh) V R I Z ! W H A M ! W H A M ! G e o rg e M ichael V A a ro n , we d on ’t need the other stuff...we c a n reach deliri um off the darkroom fum es! L e s s fu ssin g & ab so lutely no m o ney needed! And T a n im w on’t be prone to falling a s le e p ...R O v S a n g u in e S a m ...Y o u ’re m y bloody V a le n tin e ...R a e bebe V Y o u ’re lucky nothing rh ym e s with L a p e d u s...O n g (no bong or thong) W ip e r , you light up m y d reary S S M U -o b s e s s e d life. Y o u have kept m e from falling into the a b y s s (located conveniently between G e rt’s and the S S M U offices). V S a r a Je a n , o n ce you were m y editor, an d now I’m a n edi tor. O h , how the s e a s o n s they go round an d round. N G V B o yc o tt! R e m e m b e r the pain of h eterosexism ram pant in so cie ty and on cam p u s. R e m e m b e r all those a ssa u lte d by “lo vers” an d “s p o u s e s ”.

v l ’m w ish in g you a .h ap p y vale n tin e ’s so yo u ’ll m ake m e so m e good, tasty price krisp ies, J e s s ic a v m a r c , w hen you sq u e e z e ch icken , yo u ’re sq u e e zin g our hearts, s a m ‘n ella ^ r iz la , fripsi g rap sh u. S n i sni. Djim n fripescu propuni. Betsi ^ rit s c h z e l (onk), m orpuni fe scu . polupani form esi. p iszch es V H e y Jill, W h at’s up with you and K e v in ? H e d o e sn ’t like you-but I do! -Ju st a g u y in rez V T o S h irle y & Erik: m y favourite room ies in M ontreal (with the best frogs!) Love, S a ra h v B e n ji, you a re beginning to bare a n e e rie re se m b le n ce to C la r k Kent, w hat’s the d e a l? ^ n u h a (g), feldm an nips, s k ip i? jam poni frip-frip, pruuli. Bits v dev, filos, miro crisp i c h is kukis. frimini sno , B e tszzzzi ^ R a a a t c h s n e l, (stokes) funny how so m e tim e s the lan g uag e of love is en g lish , but not often, Betsy. **Benji, can I call you le o n a rd ? bets

v S e le n e , I’m sorry about the Je llo -I d id n’t think it w as loaded. O u r relationship d o e sn ’t h a ve to b e p h ysical. Jam es V B e m ine G a b b y C h a n d le r V H e y S v e ta H ap p y V a le n tin e s d ay. G o n e but n e ve r forgotten girl v L ia , T h e point at w hich “U n iversal G a rb a g e D a y ” a ss u m e d the nam e “V a le n tin e 's D a y” is unknown. N o n e th e le ss, out with the trash, girl. Lo ve, C a re . V T y la , yo u ’re so m isse d . W e love you! V R e b e c c a K a -C h in g : I h a ve no id e a who the hell you are, but I like yo u r ex p o su re s. Production Boy. v i f C h ris C a rte r got into a b ab y-o il wrestling m atch with Jo n C h o m sk i, w e’d all be the w inners. v M ic h a e l B e zu h ly is an attrac tive and talented hu m an being. W h y a re you a lw a y s m aking fun of him , S tik e m a n ? D ave . V D o m , ca n I get you a d rin k? D a ve . v j a s o n . “H atch e d !!!”, fer sure. R iz

v G e r a ld R o m e s Fa u stin o > ...th e n am e s a y s it all. v P a u l, you throw m ilk contain e rs at me, call m e n a m e s, and sn a p m y sw ivel c h a ir b a ck w ards. T h a n k s for m akin g the office se e m like a rom per room. Lo ve, R S V D a v e , let’s m ake b a b ie s. R R

v A m in , h e a d lin e s - th ey’re good fer y a . L iz v A r ju n a ? A rju n a ? ... A rju n a ? V A le x , do that stretch -an d -

I’m going to keep an for yo u in c la s s . Love, with the eyep atch in row

v B e t t y , let’s m ak e b a b ie s out of rice an d call them appetiz ers. R R v Murfet P. W ebster. Lo ve is a w arm gun. Lo ve, an a n o n y m o u s texan ^ K a lf in a , I w a s a turkey. T h e n I met you. W illard e v P a u l, P a u l, P a u l S T O P tem pting m e with the prom ise of ch o co late s! T h e photo editor ^ C ic e ly , fondest w ish e s on yo u r birthday, B o ris Y e ltsin. v jo y c e -to -th e -w o rld , yo u ’ve b een officially out-random ed. Y o u ’re b a ck to ju st being T h e Little O n e ’. R R

V S S M U co un cillo rs an d e x e cs, W h y ? W H Y ? T h e re ’s no need for that. P le a s e , ju st try an d get along, for m y sa k e . Jo Jo .

v Y o u are a s solid a s a rock, M arc. N G

V H e y W ein stein & Gitterm an, w here are the m atching s h ir t s ? ? ? R O

V A n y a , yo u ’re not a s solid a s M arc. I m ean , he brings slip pers. But then, yo u ’ve brought

v M illio n s of P e a c h e s , P e a c h e s

v S u s a n P eters, M ay you co n tinue to razzle an d d a z z le the ig n o ram u se s at M cG ill. T h a n k s , Lizlau v l know kicking m e with your firem an-boots is your w ay of show ing affection. ...Lo ve you too R a c h e . ps. do you still go for those w a lk s ? ? !!

v W e call S la ch ta T h e F re e z e r”, ‘c u z h e ’ll put y a on ice! v M ic h a e l B e zu h ly, d on’t cry. Z u h l. Z u h l... co m e on, Zuhl. D a v e ’s out to get m e. I didn’t m e an it. Z u h l? Mr. B e z u h ly ? D o n ’t take it perso nally, I think yo u ’re ve ry talented and funny. I don't m ake fun of you, D a ve d o e s. P le a s e don’t cry.

V M m m ... P e a c h e s . v S a r a Je a n , the next uberreporter to gradu ate the trib.. just rem em ber m e w hen your running First Nation. Love, your coconspirator in the T rib coup

V T o S te v e K ram er, Y o u a re so s e x y w hen yo u work at S a d ie ’s. Y o u ca n put yo ur stock in m y sh e lf anytim e. S a r a D ’A rcy

V A le x , m ayb e one d ay we could team up an d d a n c e our w ay to fam e an d fortune. I gotta start w orking out, though. NG

v ja m -m y -p o n y , rainbow colours, I love to com b his beautiful hair! T rib staff.

V D a n ie l, T h a n k s for the hard work and the reliability, lizlau

V M ic h e lle & Stef S h o u ld you m iss c la s s ag ain , I’ll co ve r your butts with m y N T C ’s. yo ur cla ssm a te

v Y o u r networking sk ills would put a n y m an ag e m e n t student to sh a m e , Ja s o n . T h a n k s for being you (and for writing sto ries for us). N G

V T h e r e once w a s a boy n am ed K A R E E M W h o fan cied him self a s a dream W e kept quiet to the end B e c a u s e we w ere h is friends A n d didn’t want to d am a g e h is esteem . -J !

v N ic k R o y is m y R o ck G od!

V D a v e lo ve s you A L L .

V D a m n paper.

V T o P au l H arve y, I L O V E Y O U DU M P T H A T G IR L O F YO U R S SO W E CAN B U ST A M O V E ! B ig O n e s

v ü z , “grum py” is not syn o n y m ous with “se rio u s”. N e ce ssa rily.

v S o is R e ub e n . A lso D ave .

v R y a n , I love you. Mai

v H i E l-B in g o , M ay I w ish you the ve ry best in B -b a ll, -M ich a e l Jo rd a n -

v S S M U , I want m y life back. C h an ta l.

V H e y P e a c o c k , Y o u are o n e of the studliest fraternity b o ys I h a ve e v e r la ye d m y e y e s on. K e e p up the good work. B am b ib a

v Z o o l, thank you for the unfail ing dedication an d creativity. H ap p y V -D a y . R iz R a u

V T o m y C ra c k e rja ck , c h e ck out the prize in m y box. Love S w e e t M arie

v H i Stan. V B e a k e r , be m y v a le n tin e ? B e e p -b e e p .

v j a m e s is a big w uss. D a ve . V D e a r K rish, B e cky, and S h e ila M y mouth is your g a rb a g e d isp o sa l. H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y ...P a t

V L ia , W hat if a d em onized cu p id borrowed force from M ars an d Jupiter’s arrow s to shoot N eptune an d U ranu s right out of the u n iv e rs e ? S m ilin g , C a re .

P s y c h e a n d C u p id in th e L o u v re .

V R a c h e l S . Y o u don’t intimi date m e. I do w hat I do b e c a u se you enjo y it. P C

¥ S am m m m m m m i. W h y are there so m an y fires in M tl? B e c a u s e of you, baby, your d elirio us co at 5 am

V A le x F in la yso n , W h e n I saw you a c ro s s that bar, I knew you w ere a star! Y o u ’re sp e cial!

^ A le x - do cat-p e o p le e x ist? could you find out for th u rsd a y? loving you, bets

V R a c h e l S ., you u se d to work with Kurt, an d I’v e been a friend of h is sin ce jun io r kinder garten. I think that m e a n s we h a ve a lot in com m on. N G

**A nya, m y favorite Ukrainian, w e’ll play s o cc e r so m e d a y, bets

v A lth o u g h you g a ve yourself a n e e ry n ickn a m e on the recipe, the m eal w a s quite scrum ptious. Liz, p le ase help Benji get better, I’m worried. N G (a ka fucker) V D e a r Sorethroat, I’m writing to let you know that our two lovebirds are doing fine. T h e y sh a re som ething sp e cia l that few co u p le s sh a re . W e believed in them b e c a u se they believed in e a ch other; after all

^ A a r o n , “Ich liebe d ich ,” sagte Frits a n den kleinem F isc h . A b e r d a s F is c h verstehte kein E n g lisch . W a s ? Betty **Betty. W eirdo. v S e v a g m a k e s m e feel funny all over. A n d I don’t h a ve a problem with it. P P . V H e y P a m e la Le e -D ro p the zero an d get with the hero!Ja yn e l

so und thing a g ain . P le a s e ? DB.

v S n o o p . First you get the m oney, then you get the power. O n c e you got the power, then you get too m an y w om en all at the sa m e tim e... J O S

V A n g e lie , yo u ’re so keen! K e e p up the good work. Production Boy.

V F r a n k . Lovely, delicate Fran k ie . Y o u so sw eet. Love R iz

V S ig u r d s o n for P resident! (Of S S M U !) Brought to you by the Com m ittee for S ig u rd so n for P re sid e n t (of S S M U ).

v F u c k e r s ! G iv e m e a window!

Rachel O ng

v Y a k u z a : M arc G illia m m ay not be Ja p a n e s e , but he is very c ap ab le . At least give him a ch a n ce ! “D a v e ”. V I haven't se e n a n y in here for m yself, so here’s one: D ave , I love you, you c ra z y bastard. Lo ve, you. v W h e r e ’s S te v e G o o d in so n w hen w e need h im ? V W h e r e ’s B ryan t Jo h n so n w hen yo u need h im ?

v M a r c u s , C r a c k e r Barrel Ch ed d ar can stan d the test of time. Purolater time. R iz v h i se rg e , yo u ’re m y re d -co n s girl, love room ie v D e a r M andi, In the w ords of Jo h n C le e s e , “S it on m y face, and show m e that you love m e.” Love RM V T o Kira, If only I could look a s good in yo ur d re ss a s you do! H ap p y V -D a y cutie! Love, you know who V T o m y lovely V a le rie , T h a n x for all our great stats chats! Next y e a r in A s ia , baby! H ap p y

/ V a le n tin e ’s D ay! W ig h t of m y life, Y o u will a lw a y s be m y one and only love. .Truly, S w e e t Butt W /a le r ie is a s p e c ia l person who d e se rv e s all the h a p p in e ss in the world. D B . W o the L a d ie s: Howdy. D a ve W a u r a M acN is the m e an e st funniest fre sh m an -typ e viking person. ^ P lu m b e r ’s Fau cet: w h a ? W h e Sp e th m an n m a k e s no s e n s e so m etim es. S o m e tim e s? T ry all the tim e ...Fre a k. «^D ouble D e u ce , yo u ’re a lw ays d eserted w hen C o p a ’s p acked. Fo r that, I love you. W o m y one and only D e sire D IA N E , I want to thank you for the love you brought m e and still do. H ap p y V alen tin e! P a sc a l. W o the w om an at P la y e rs ’ Th eatre. I d on ’t h a ve to act like I’m likin’ you. Y o u r secret adm irer.

R iz R a u W o N igelo Buom o, you a re a star. Lo ve r sup e rn o va * M a ch e re Lin d sa y, I h a ve fee lin g s for you. I se e you at the boite an d sin ce then I T h in k of you all the time. I a s k your friends about you only b e c a u se I want to m eet you. P le a s e Lin d sa y, give m e une ch a n ce , co m e out with m e on this rom antic night. T o n am our, T ro is -R iv ie re s

W a n e s a : T h e w alls to your room are thin but I d on ’t care . L o v e ??

^ S n o o p . If one thing in this life is certain, if history h a s taught u s anything...it’s that you can fuck a n yon e . J O S

W o “cool hat w om an” and “g la s s e s g uy” of the A lle y C a ts. Y o u a re the light of 17 peo p le’s lives. Y o u a re surrogate p ar ents to a bu nch of undernour ish ed editors. W e L O O O O V E you. W a u l : you're a su p e r-lin g uist an d a sports babe, what m ore ca n be s a id ? H ap p y V -D a y . A S W r a n k lin , le ast known to m e of all editors, you h a v e cool co ve ralls an d a quote, and that’s all one really n e e d s. A S W n o o p . W e a v e a n e v e r m ore tangled web. I h a ve m uch to teach you yet. First learn w alk, then learn run. J O S W V h iz W o w . My hard h a n d s a re re stle ssly w aiting for you. JO S v A n ya . W ield yo u r w izardly pow ers with caution, the effects ca n be am o ro u s. J O S W a u c e t . Y o u r id e a s h a ve run dry. ^ D a r r y l Le v in e , K e e p your b o ogies off m y K leenex.

W la n 't get enough of yo ur love babe! O h ... I don't know why, d on ’t know w hy ... I c a n ’t get eno ugh of yo ur love babe. v D a ve . Y o u r pap er producing pow ers inspire m e to recite the conjugation of Latin ve rb s e n d ing in -ere. J O S ^ J o y c e . A d a y for loving and se lfle ss gift-giving. How 's 15 y e a rs with a m ajo r city d aily so un d ? J O S v D e a r P un P u n W e go togeth er like p e a c h e s & cream W o all the S a d ie ’s staff who h a ve a b an do n e d m e at L e a co ck . Y o u know who you are , don’t y o u ? H ap p y V -D a y , no sa rc a s m intended!

*T U e 3 B a rd s. D o n ’t sp e n d too m uch tim e U nderground, its m ouldy. I’ll h a ve to fill you in on m y latest thoughts J O S ^ K a r e n . E c h in a c e a is a rare form of the v e n u s fly trap. In J a m e s ’ T a y lo r’s w ords “another round p le a s e ”. J O S W e a r P un P u n W e go togeth er like p e a c h e s & cream W o all the S a d ie 's staff who h a ve ab a n do n e d m e at Le a co ck . Y o u know who you are, don’t y o u ? H ap p y V -D a y , no sa rc a s m intended! W V o Ify : sw eet love-bunny, jujub e , giant p un-p un in grow n up clothes, yu m m y hu n ey love, Ivy

(ed. Minimalism is over rated.)

W iz

W rty D u p e y, Y o u r skin, yo ur sm ile , the crin kle s n e a r your e y e s, I love m uch you so m uch. A lw a ys rem em ber that (C h e e se )

W lic o le , P icard w a s right w hen he sa id w e should not fall back! W e m ust m ove for w ard...let’s do it? -you r’s and your’s alone v M y d e are st S a ra h , T h a n k s for all the great w eekend s. Looking forward to sp end ing V d a y with you. Love the No Lo n g e r Lo n e ly B aron W o the m an b e sid e m e in m y logic c la s s -l love it w hen you chew on yo ur g la s s e s W r i n , S e e in g you n aked (sort of) in P h y sio just m a k e s m e want you m ore. Ja s o n V M e l 12 M onkeys an d m e. Let’s sw ing baby, Tig e r. W o p h y , I just ch e cke d at the book store the legal s iz e files are 85 cents e a ch . It would be c h e a p e r for us to buy a box at $ 17 .6 0 . B ye A.

«^N obody’s calle d m e naughty before. I like it.

«^R eu b en , Y o u ’ve got W hipp éd C re a m cornin’ out of yo ur a s s . RR

W risha o h p le a se o h p le a se o h p le a se o h p le a se can I be in your p la y ? I ca n be gay! R e ally! D ave .

» A W HI C U T IE ! Y E S , Y O U KNOW W HO YOU

^ T e e hee, tee hee, you e -in ch ie fs are so o naughty. R S

**Rich, you w ere born to be a star! w ho’s the “other” g irl? Luv M

W îk u llb y t e r? A rse b yte r is m ore like it!

v W o o d + F le u ry -N o ch ick could e v e r re p lace you g uys. In m y h e art-and m y bed. Love,

W e e hee, tee hee, you faucet bo ys are soo naughty. R S

W y p e setter poster bo ys who g ra ce our office with your im p e cca b le d re ssin g style and double entendres: m m m ... R S

W r i k a S . I m iss you. M ayb e I’ll go to c la s s.

W o R a c h e l S .-Y o u look like S h e ryl Crow on the co ve r of “S h e ry l C ro w .” Y o u and T rib u n e rule.

W V A N L A P ID U S , Y O U R A M ACK, A STA R , AND YOU M A K E M Y H E A R T S IN K . TH A N X FO R T H E M EM O R IE S !

W ) n g D ong S ilve r. W ham ! Y o u ’re m y L a d y G o d iva , or what’s h is putz. Y o u ’ve got that schw in g in yo ur photos, love riz

W o s e s a re red, V io lets are blue, V a le n tin e po em s are s u p p o sed to rhym e, T h is one d o e sn ’t. P a u l T .

W h a t M ila w rites a good co l umn.

v H a p p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y to S ch m y a n S ch m o k e

W ’ hil, Y o u m ake m e feel like a natural w om an in love. C a ro le .

f a u c e t , m y e y e s are dry.

W l v i s C o sto iko, I dig your rock opera, or at le ast the excerpts I’ve se e n . D B .

v W in n ie , W h at’s O n , baby, for to nite? H ap p y V -d a y ! R iz

W i a , m y love, allow m e to re vise m y statem ent-out with the old, in with the new! Love C a re .

W O G , w e’re co n cern e d about you.

v R a c h e the M artian. Let’s...let’s...le t’s...ju st not c ro ss breed, riz

W a d a , I’m going out with you ‘c a u s e I love you, not ‘c a u s e yo u’re the on ly girl in C h e m Eng. R.

W e t e r , I’d like so m e of you cottontail. Love, Fluffy. W e a r A n n e C h ave t, T h a n k s for last w eek! I love you to death! (T h is isn ’t yo ur boyfriend!) Love, L S W o v e of m y life, you are m y d estiny and beyond. I love you p a ssio n a te ly and sin ce re ly! V e n u s

T h e C a p u le t b a lc o n y i n

V e ro n a , It a ly

A R E ...J U S T W A N T E D T O T E L L YO U HOW M UCH I L O V E Y O U . H A P P Y V -D A Y . XOX, S W lh r is , ju st ‘c a u s e you got the pow er d on ’t m ean that you should get all the g u ys W o Bolette, C u p id w ould like to extend his w ish e s an d an o p e n -e n d e d dinn er invite you w ay! H ap p y V -D a y ! W i n g ho to the life of a bear, S in g ho to a pooh. S in g ho to m y little girl N at w hose V -D a y w ish e s will co m e true! <*Andrea, I’m sorry the ring is m ad e of foil but m y c a s in o plan didn’t w ork out. Ju st keep it a w ay from yo u r fillings. O u r love is forever. Bill W o s ie , Y o u light up m y life. Love, M adonna W e n n , B ab y, I love yo ur new bath products. S h a r e ? Love DW » M y heart belon g s to D elilah Stew art v Mila, n e u ro sis m a y not be good for you over long periods of time. A s k W oody. Liz W S o u l of m y soul, life is m e a n in g le ss without you, you a re a treasure from h e ave n . Love, S u n sh in e V L B + D C O u r love is not quite breakfast, not quite lunch, but you get a p ie ce of can talo p e on the sid e . -X X O O W a r n -I want to ch e w with you. Lo ve C h e w y

T h e N om ad

«*Nat, M ay V -D a y bring a s m uch p le a su re to you a s you Rachel O ng h a ve given m e on T h u rs d a y nights! Love C ra ig !

V M ic k e y , Y o u ’re so fine you blow m y m ind. But se riou sly, let’s get so m e tuna helper and cud dle up in front of the T V Frid ay. T e n

^ M a rs h m a llo w , Y o u r sw eet n e s s excites m e...yo u han d s m ake m e tingle in sid e ...yo u r love g iv e s m e life. Forever, P re cio u s

W i z L a u -Y o u ’re the coolest editor I h a ve e v e r se e n . S ta y hip, you phat ch ick

W o J a m e s , W inter, Spring, Su m m e r, or Fa ll, all yo u ’ve got to is call, A n d I’ll be there, Y e a h , Y e a h , Y o u ’ve got a friend

W o r i: I want to ch o o -ch o o ch o o se you. I love you m y little d e ad -fish . Love Bone W h i s o n e g o e s out to the one I lo ve -H a p p y V a le n tin e ’s m y kit ten. Love a lw a y s-y o u r su g a r pie W e l l e is d a bom b an d so are you A n g ie X O W o O rl-E y e , T h e cutest girl from W in n ip eg that I e v e r met! W a n n a go for a d rin k ? Love S e rg ie ! W a r & Ju l: P e rh a p s we can indulge in that 3 -w a y on this lovely d ay! Love T N W o s h Finkelstein is a red h e ade d vixen v A le x , m y twisted perversion h a s alerted m e to the fact that little b o ys have o n e up on m e. W ith D ouble D isg ust, C a re . W a c h e l , I think you and I ought to take so m e tips from Lia-w ill you wallow with m e ? Love, C a re . W r ik a : I m iss yo ur c h e e s e s a u c e . Lo ve C h a rle s v D e a r M add a G o o se , W ill you be o ur g a le n g in e ? W e love goo! Love, T o m an d M adda G o o se. X O X O

W i z , Y o u a re so w eird... but in a good w ay. P C W e a r M V G , H ap p y V a le n tin e s D a y! T h o s e green e y e s of yo u rs h a ve n ever looked better! Lo ve S T W a r a , M y love for you is a s d e ep a s the o ce an . Lo ve C ra ig o C r a ig , Y o u are the light of m y life. I love you. S a ra W o R o cco ! I know you hate this d ay, uh, but listen, m e too! M ove yo ur bu ns. C . W alken W U h e n of R edp ath: All you e v e r w ant is m y ID but all m y ID w ants is you. I’ll settle for “C re a tive W riters and D a yd re a m in g ” (Freud)

ing certificate I got you. Love Andrew W a p p y V a le n tin e ’s D ay, R ach e l! H e re ’s to death, regen eration, s e x an d se cre ts: m ay you travel an d good fortune sh a p e o ur parallel North N odes! Love, Lia W 'o u n am e is fred, T h e y call you Fred, And when we sleep , I want your b a c k upon m y bed. -B ird ie W , Love in friendship. Y ou m ake m e laugh. D o n’t stop. I m isse d you too. Jo se p h in e » M a r ie -E v e , If I w ouldn’t be leaving, I m ight a s k you out-or m ayb e I w ill...Y ve s W i r a , Betty Ford h a s com e. Nat W r a c e y , I know it’s late, but let’s h a ve so m e ch est and nuts roasting by a n open fire. Rob «^ R ach e l, H ap p y Fu ck -O ff D ay. Lots of fuck, R R W e r r y , time, love adn tender n e s s is what we both d e se rve B U T K E E P M IC H E A L B O L T O N A W A Y ! D ’A rcy W e n n : W e lived the tropical fantasy, w e b a re ly su rvive d the m u d slid e s. D o n ’t lock out your dirty lover, he w ants in, the storm h a s returned. J. ^ C h r is t in e B ., sh arin g c la s s e s with you brightens up m y d ay, with yo ur perky sm ile an d fash ion se n s e . Ju st a friend, but I think yo u ’re cool. M K W o n g haired S w e d ish C e c ilia , I am better than you in all things, an d Lem o n h ead really su c k s . P S : W h e re do they put all the ugly people in S w e d e n ? W o S E K x y , H o p e you h a ve a fab ulou s b lack friday...even if it m e a n s stan ding up tradition. H a v e a great trip. Love fire » E m m a , N o rth -A m e rica’s a n sw e r to M arm ite: C h e e s e W h iz W o m y Ism aili M an (AM J), W e e k d a y nights in B la c k e rW ood I s e e Y o u r head bent o ver the books. Y o u r e y e s, yo ur sm ile, your R ico S u a v e looks. O n F rid a y night in J K I watch you a s you sit and pray. Love, A N au g h ty Ism aili G irl W a c h e l , T h a n k s for being m y A lex Tre b e k. Lo ve V a n n a W o m m y , A u g. 3 1 ,1 9 9 6 w a s a sp e cia l d ay. H o p e it never fa d e s a w ay. T h a n x 4 the m em ories. U T W o E rika, A sm o k e and a diet co ke will get her through a n y W e d n e sd a y! M ay you leap over that hum p! W d a rk , Y o u ’re a babe, here is your ve ry own V a le n tin e s letter from moi. Jo W o Is is and A n dre, W h o gave m e life an d love, I am eternally yours, A s you a re m ine. N ad ia

W e a u t if u l A lle y Brunette ( K im ? ? ) I anticipate the d ay that will begin at your d elicio u s kitchen table. -S A

W o r g e s , H am ste rs, P a p e r T o w e ls an d B o o m -B o o m -B o o m this w eekend . Lo ve, T h e P ro fesso r

W e y J a m e s , you are the best “lovely a ssistan t” I h a ve e ve r co m e a cro s s ! R a ch e l

W o Lind z: I love you, I love you, I love you (and I’m not drunk) from: the other se xist girl at M cG ill.

V M is s wong, I dig yo ur white pants the m ost. Lo ve M ystery M an W u l ie , I hope you enjoy, and put to good u se , the bod y w ax

W e n o u fra p p a c c in o , R o s e s are red, V io lets a re blue, I hate writing letters, S o I hope yo u ’ve gotten so m e by now. A m ollia

C F

7 ahntin6S

♦ T o P a u l H arve y, I want you: let’s just s a y I’m e a s ie r than a C o n co rd ia entrance exam , and that’s e a sy ! Big O n e s ♦ T o Matt the only cute boy in M anagem ent with a purple jacke t. Y o u ’re the sig n that there’s still hope for M anagem ent yet. T h a n k s , X ♦ H o p on a b u s gus, D o n ’t need to d is c u s s m uch, 50 w a ys to le a ve yo ur lover. S o rry Je n . Love T o n y ♦ D o n , Y o u r jo k e s are cle ve r but h a n d s off M itsum i. Bill ♦ M o n ik a -y o u r room is d ark an d w arm , like a c a v e . W a n n a hibernate togeth er? T .

♦ 1 ) G u e s s w ho’s got a cru sh on you, Jill C ? Y o u n e ve r e ve r will. 2 )Jo se p h in a R o se m a ry C la rk , w an n a co m e b a ck to my p lace to stare at the c e ilin g ? ♦ D o r n . Y o u are sup ercool. E v e n a s an enginner, you have a so cia l co n scie n c e that puts u s to sh a m e . Lo ve, J& D . ♦ T o K evin at S a d ie ’s, I work with you and love to stare at yo ur butt ch ise lle d from stone, an d I don't care if Jill know s! AK ♦ T h a n x for being V a n n a II, F ra n k y-d o n ’t worry, I h a v e n ’t forgotten you J a m e s !! E v e r Y o u rs, Pat S a ja k ♦ J o a n n e -I hope our relation sh ip ca n be m ore than tenuous so m e d a y. -Y o u r w ell-coiffed friend ♦ J u lie , Y o u ’ve got the right stuff, baby. Love the w ay turn m e on. D onn ie ♦ B e t t y “D u m p lin g s”, R e m e m b e r that what is H u n g arian C h ic k e n to so m e is ju st C h ic k e n with S a u c e for others. R iz. ♦ D o m in a trix H ap p y V -D a y , or rather D -D a y . Aphrodite. ♦ H i J what ca n I s a y ? H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y! Love Lorraine ♦ H a p p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y to Mat S m a ll ♦ V iv ia n C h ih I love you! ♦ C a r o lin e . I hard ly know you, but it w a s fun playing pictionary with you. S e e you next w e e k ? ? Jo se p h in e ♦ D e a r Lori McNulti, T h is is m y real letter to you. A ve ry secret ad m irer ♦ S h a n e n e , I g u e s s the only w ay w e c a n talk is through V a le n tin e s. I c a n ’t wait to grad uate so we c a n sp e n d m ore tim e together. L e e X O ♦ B a b y d o ll, W e live in u n cer tain tim es. Return to m e safe ly a d n let m e love you forever. I’m yo u rs til E a st m eets W e st...Lo ve , Y o u r A sso cia te . ♦ M P L ...y o u ’re the thunderbolt thru m y storm clou d...m em ories of Po oh are with m e alw ays. I L O V E Y O U ! Love, A C d a S p a z ♦ T o Mr. Q u a sa r, you are the star bright. S u p e rn o va

♦ D e a r J e s s ic a , I either sen d you this in the Trib un e , or I’ll get drunk an d call you repeat ed ly on Frid ay. Lo ve Mike ♦ D e a r lin d say, you all dat and a bag of ch ip s. S in ce re ly, Pat ♦ N o w , A s twilight g le a m s the s k y above, recalling thrills of our love, T h e re one thing I’m certain of Return, I will, T o O ld, Brazil. ♦ A da, Con g rat! U usurped the random crown from me, (but I still want U a s m y V .) ♦ P a v lo P sh y k , yo u ’re too slick! yo u ’re so sw eet an d sm art, yo u ’ve got m y heart!

G o n d o la s o n t h e la z y b a n k s o f V e n ic e

m ate...uh...kate. -J .

who h a n d le s the bills.

♦ T o Ian M cJannet, W h en are you going to ackn o w ledg e m y w inks an d s ta re s ? I’m not afraid to adm it m y feelings...

♦ O f all the c h e a p gin joints in the world, you had to w alk into m ine, Ingrid. H um ph rey

♦ D e a r Fran co P . I love you m ore than a n yo n e e lse in the world. Y o u ’re the m ate of m y so u llH e le n P.

♦ S o p h ia : let’s get together and sh a re “A m o re” Lo ve S p a n ish Fly ♦ M a n of m y d re am s, I love th e e ...D ia n a ♦ H a il the w hale, F o r it is his d ay, H ail the w hale, On V a le n tin e ’s D a y. A n on ym o us ♦ M ie p s , W ofur ist d ie se r K n o p f? Fip si ♦ D e a r Pat Yongpradit, I love you like I love m y bladder. Love, M ike T a y lo r ♦ T o : Liz H ayd n Jo n e s, T h rice the brindled cat hath m ew ed, ...tis time, tis tim e. Y o u ’re the triple bom b-shot, the s n a -n a na, the ca t’s m eow, and the P ig ’s oink. -N in a ♦ T o m y B estest, I love you with all m y heart. H e re ’s to reunification in N Y C ...M S ♦ B e t t y , yo u ’re cra zy, but we love you. H e re ’s to future co un cils m eetings. Lots of luck with the sta lk in g ...A S ♦ R a lp h . I c h o o -ch o o -ch o o se you. L isa ♦ P o o s io , Y o u can not p o ssib ly be a n cuter than you a r e . J ’m so lucky! S e x y ♦ H a p p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y Ja n e , Longtim e “not so ” secret adm ir er ♦ M a r k : I c h e c k your bu n s in geo. c la s s, M m m m ...M m m m m good Lo ve Y S A ♦ D e a r S u z a n n e , W ill you be m y v a le n tin e ? F ra n k

♦ D e a r Robin an d A m y. R o s e s are R e d , V io lets are Blue, H e re ’s a H ap p y V a le n tin e s d ay w ish, From m e to the two of you. love, B -D ♦ P h ilo s o p h e r King. A red plush heart hung from a noose. All for you, A R T

♦ W o o d and Fle u ry - N o ch ick could e v e r rep lacre you g u ys, in m y heart - and m y bed. Love, the nom ad.

♦ P r in c e s s Little E a rs , like you sa id to B ig -M a c, if I w ere you a g e , I w ould be yo ur best friend. -R u b your sho uld ers.

♦ D e a r C o ra l, H ap p y 7 m onths until m y birthday. H ope you get lots of chocolate. M yles

♦ L : I want to su ck le on you g o urd -like cra n iu m all d ay long. Love T .T . B o y

♦ K o c h a n y , My heart is yours for a lw a ys! I love you bu n ch es! Muffin

♦ K a r e e m y ...H ic c u p birthday to yo u /H ap p y bu rpd ay to yo u/ H ap p y birthday to K are e m y/ H ap p y birthday A C H O O !/ C h e e rs to not being a lo n e / on V a le n tin e ’s D a y a n d / yo ur birth d ay. Love Lorraine

♦ S M , 6 ’0 ”, 160 lbs, s k s a lle v ia tion from m onotony of M cG ill. b h kh @ m u sicb .m cgill.ca

♦ E lis a b e t h , R is e and sh in e good looking, it’s yo ur w ake up call. Y o u ’re a lw a y s late, but lately yo u ’ve been charm ing. A ve ry co n cern ed cla ssm a te .

♦ C a r l a T . -A ll I need in this life of sin is m e an d m y girlfriend (you). -M uch love, T u p a c

♦ H e y Kier, Let’s rock!! K ate

♦ T o m y S tu d y B uddy, D N A , R N A , Q N A . Now how about so m e T N A . M ike

♦ T o Jill M cJa n n e T ., “V o u le z vo u s co u ch e r a v e c m o i?” Ju st in c a s e you don’t know, that m e an s, “ will you be m y V a le n tin e ?" K evin

♦ G e e E lizabeth, I g u e s s I love you an d broom ball m ore than m y calf. I.N. P a yn e

♦ T o m y F rid a y G e rt’s co m pagnon: it’s great se e in g you e ve ry Frid ay. Y o u m ak e m e sm ile. Jo se p h in e .

♦ M y darling Philipp e, B ab y, I love all yo ur w a ys. B e m y V a le n tin e ? T h at would m ake m y world. 143 .X om e

♦ P u d a pud, I love you.

♦ H e y Mom, W e ju st w anted to let you know: be strong w e’re a lw a y s here for you and we love you! D + D + P

♦ P u p p y -I got cra m p s. F a ls e alarm . Bitch ♦ K e n n e t h . W h a t’s the frequen c y ? D an “in a lather” R ath er ♦ M is s C a n d ic e ll’m no, you know who. I’m better. H a H a H ap p y V alen tin o D a y. S u p e r ♦ “Y u m m y ” ch ick e n stirfry provider. C o u p e s m e s ch e ve ux + carp e diem . T h e re are m an y fish in the s e a . H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y

♦ H a p p y V a le n tin e ’s C e lie . E n jo y the sile n ce . #402 (the g u y a b o ve you). ♦ T o the long harried bab e in history. D a m n y o u ’re hot.

♦ R i z Y o u are the T R U E stir frying Q u e e n in m y life...O n g

♦ T o all the people without enough guts sign their n a m e s to m e s sa g e s . D a m n yo u ’re cow ards.

♦ T o M ichelle S : P .S . [s/c/j: B y the w ay. Y o u ’re quite sup er, 2 nd a lso , I’m fam iliar with your work, a s it w ere, and it’s quite stellar. K is s e s , N.

♦ J o n C h o m sk i, Pow er is a real turn on. I’ll be waiting. Love, you know who.

♦ T o m y hellen ic god Dino, A s I w atch you an d your stooges a cro s s the room, su d d e n ly the topic of p a ra site s go to the noom . T h a t de vilish sm ile, those stan ic e y e s ...B a b y , you ca n light m y fire anytim e. Love, D ie se l and co m p an y.

♦ D e a r S U S , Y o u r m asco t h a s retired. H e h a s transferred to arts. J!

♦ K a t e K ate bo bate b a n a n a fa n a fo fate m e m y mo

♦ H i to all S a d ie ’s staff. W e need m ore parties. More beer, definitely m ore beer. Aphrodite

♦ T o the cute bartender at G e rt’s, the sp a rk is there, act on it. Love, G e n e ro u s T ip p e r

♦ T o the S a d ie ’s M anager. A re you co n cern e d about the path your c a re e r is taking.

♦ V ic k ie , Q u e cette a u b e / au point do la lu m ère/ ne voit de cré p u scu le / je t’aim e. S é b a stie n

♦ B e t h , Y o u r b ra ce s cut m y crotch, but I love you. P.

♦ D e a r A im ée: M issin g you this V a le n tin e ’s D a y . T h e whole G u e lp h thing w a s a h a p p y-sa d exp erience, but it w a s m eant to be. B est of Lu ck. Love alw ays, J.

♦ D e a r M ik an d Mike, T h is let ter is not a vale n tin e ’s w ish. I only want to s e e som ething. I’ve written in the paper. H e y what’s up! B -D

♦ B a n a a a a a n a , If I had one w ish this V alen tin e, I w ould a s k cupid to put m e in yo ur a rm s forever! W h at do you th in k? Banaaana

♦ T h e R ed H erring lo ves e ve ry one. Love, T h e R e d Herring

♦ E d s e m , F e b ru a ry 2 4 , 9 5 , w as the d ay that ch a n g e d m y life forever. Y o u are a part of me, the m ost important factor resp o n sib le for m y jo y of living. I need you. Im adlak. Elv.

Rachel O ng

♦ M a r k : Is that a pen in your pocket or just carm elle! Love, R at

♦ K a t e H o rsely, your so cool, you m ake m e drool! ♦ E r in : I n ever knew what love w a s until I saw your cu rv a c e o u s body. K e e p up the good work. Lo ve Lother ♦ H e y S a d ie ’s m an, it’s not b e c a u se of the cho colate b ars that I’m still in this d e ad end job. C a ll m e soooon! T h e lady

♦ J e w e l, Y o u are the one thing in m y life that is perfect! M ucha. ♦ F r o m one little S a d ie ’s girl to another: cupid told m e that he loved you. ♦ T o Je n W .: I loaf you, I love, I lurve you. -N .

♦ T o eve ryo n e e lse I d id n’t h a ve to write notes to (which is W A Y too m any), happ y V a le n tin e ’s D a y! P au l ♦ S w e e t Puff of Lo ve, I love loving you and I love the love w e sh a re . W ill you be m ine for e v e r? M unchkin ♦ Y a e l S ch lo s s. S h e ’s the b o ss, s h e ’s lean an d m ean and president of C lu b P isc in e

♦ R ic h le e -L o o k e d for you all w eekend. W h e re w ere y o u ? Bonhom m e

♦ T o “Fifippe”, I will a lw a y s love you. “N a n o u ”

♦ m a y ‘T u rk e y ” an d T h e n e ck” live in harm ony forever. H ap p y V -D a y to the rice ca ke s.

♦ D o n ’t forget to refrigerate the s a u c e S ylvie ! happ y V a le n tin e s.

♦ H a m m a h : E v e n though your haircut w a s free it still looks fab ulous, love ? ?

♦ A d r ia n . -R o ck y.

♦ T o the Frid ay afternoon wait re ss at G e rt’s: Hi. ♦ N a t and S e rg e up a tree, k -is -s -i-n -g . V a le n tin e s’ is for friends, too! I love you! M erry V -D a y ! ♦ H a p p y V a le n tin e Annette, an d m an y m an y m ore to com e. I love you. Fo re ve r Y ou rs. Tu o n g

♦ S h e lly , I love you eve n from afar, H.

♦ B e r g e , Y o u d e se rve only the best on this s p e c ia l d ay: red hearts, red ro se s, and red her rings. E a p h ♦ T o the red haired girl I s e e in the Bronfm an building, I’d like you to m an ag e m y acco unts! S e cre t Adm irer. ♦ T o G .P ., Lets ch a rg e a d m is sion to Atwater F a lls . C o o n ♦ T o C a ro lyn n e : C lyd e , Clyde honey, there’s som ething in sid e us, C ly d e T h e body is 80 % w ater an d electricity is surg in g on through! H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y, Love, Lia ♦ C h r is , S a u s a g e an d peppers. M m m , c a n ’t wait for V a le n tin e ’s. Jo e ♦ T o A lex, but to the girl A lex not the g u y A le x b e c a u se I m yself am not that kind of guy, H ap p y V a le n tin e ’s D a y. Love you R obin. ♦ J e n n , a m a zin g room mate. I c a n ’t be lie ve you are leaving. W h o is going to w ake m e up n o w ? Love Jo se p h in e . ♦ D e a r e s t B a n -B a n , I reach out to you so often, p le a se reach back, -B a b e ♦ T h e rain in S p a in falls m ainly on lorraine. A g a in . W hat a pain. B e m y V a le n ta in ? J.

♦ N a n c y , uh. Uh. O h christ, I forget. R onald.

♦ H r . H ios. R o c k on with Q u e e n ’s R ych e . Lo ve Trix y T a y lo r

♦ N a t Devito, Y o u turn m e on, you give m e a “ra ise .” A n d I d on ’t m e an pay. Y o u r B o ss

♦ T o the boy that I adm ire from afar: I’d s a y hi, but I d on’t want to inflate your ego.

♦ E r n ie , Let’s go to V e g a s a s soon a s we gradu ate in M ay. Sam !

♦ T o m y lovebird R a ch e l O n g — a veritable C u p id , photogra ph er and an d diligent V a le n tin e s typist sup rem e. T h a n k s from eve ryo n e who wrote this w eek!!

♦ C h u c k , A little candlelight, a little w ine. B e m ine you velvet frog. Love Rita

P a g e 19

B e a c y n ic . S h u n and

lo v e

re n t W o o d y A lle n

m o v ie s . T r y

A n n ie H a ll.

ntertainment

Michael Franti spearheads jails, terrorism and drug laws By Stuart D etsky

F r a n ti o f h is n e w s o u n d . F r a n ti h a s a llo w e d h is v o ic e to

E q u a l p a rts ra p , r o o ts , re g g a e ,

b e m o r e o f a n in s tr u m e n t th a n ju s t

a n d a p in c h o f R a s ta r a g e is th e

a v e s s e l f o r w o r d s . “ I w a n t t o use

m u s ic a l r e c ip e f o r S p e a rh e a d .

m y v o ic e in th e s a m e w a y th a t

T h e S a n F r a n c is c o B a y - a r e a

C o lt r a n e u s e d h is s a x o r M ile s

g r o u p h a s b e e n s tr e tc h in g m u s ic a l

p la y s h is tr u m p e t . H a v i n g d o n e a

a n d s o c ia l b o u n d a r ie s s in c e its

lo t o f s p o k e n - w o r d , I ’ v e le a r n e d to

in c e p tio n a n d s u b s e q u e n t d e b u t

m a k e m y v o ic e c a r r y th e m u s ic , ”

r e le a s e ,

h e e la b o ra te s .

H om e,

1994.

The

F r a n t i ’ s c u r r e n t p r o m o t io n a l

s o p h o m o re e f f o r t , C h o c o l a t e S u p a H i g h w a y , w i l l h i t s to r e s l a t e r i n

t o u r a ll o w e d h i m

F e b r u a r y , a n d is d e s tin e d t o b e a

h is

h ip - h o p s ta p le .

p r o w e s s a t B i s t r o 4 la s t T u e s d a y .

“ I h o p e m o r e p e o p le w i l l h e a r

s p o k e n -w o rd

t o d e m o n s t r a te p e rfo rm a n c e

“ G a s G a u g e ,” a g r o o v y , m e lo d ic ,

t h is a lb u m a n d b e in s p ir e d b y i t , ”

a lm o s t h a p p y s o u n d in g p ie c e o n

a s s e rts

d is c , w a s tr a n s fo r m e d in t o th e d a rk

M ic h a e l

F r a n ti,

and

S p e a rh e a d ’ s fr o n tm a n . “ M u s ic is m o r e p o w e r f u l th a n

m e la n c h o ly

song

t h a t th e

l y r ic s im p ly .

p o li t i c s a n d , a lth o u g h p e o p le m a y

“ T h a t s o n g s ta r te d o f f as a

i n i t i a l l y p u t o n th e a lb u m a n d ju s t

p la y I w a s a s k e d to w r it e a b o u t

g e t i n t o th e g r o o v e , I h o p e t h e y

g u n c o n t r o l . I th e n t o o k m y

w i l l t h e n l i s t e n t o th e l y r i c s a n d

p a g e , f o u r - r o le d r a m a a n d d e c id e d

c o n n e c t w i t h th e m .”

t o m a k e i t in t o a s o n g .” T h e f i r s t S p e a rh e a d a lb u m

M o r e th a n ju s t a fr o n tm a n , F ra n ti

w r ite s

o r c o - w r ite s

a ll

15-

ta c k le d

s u c h d iv e r s e to p ic s

S p e a rh e a d ’ s m u s ic , p e n s th e ly r ic s ,

h o m e le s s n e s s , s u ic id e , a n d A I D S

a n d p la y s m o s t o f th e g u it a r a n d

— th e la tte r in th e s o n g “ P o s it iv e , ”

b a ss tra c k s .

w h ic h

M ic h a e l F r a n t i o f S p e a r h e a d w a s i n M o n t r e a l la s t T u e s d a y f o r s p o k e n w o r d p r o m o t io n

emi

M usic

h a s b e e n a d o p te d b y th e o f th e

re m e m b e r th e t im e in O k la h o m a /

S u p a H i g h w a y ] , f o r th e c le a n v e r

c a n b e a n im p o r t a n t f o r m o f m e d i

H IV /A ID S

Y o u t r ie d t o b la m e a n A r a b / B u t

s io n o f th e a lb u m —

c in e .”

C ro s s .

th e w h i t e y w a s th e b o m b e r / Y o u

n o c u r s in g —

t h e y t o o k o u t th e

F r a n ti, th o u g h n o t i l l h im s e lf ,

H e r o e s o f H ip h o p r i s y , S p e a rh e a d

“ P o s i t i v e ” w a s a ls o i n c l u d e d o n

b e j u m p i n ’ t o c o n c lu s io n s / 1 t h i n k

w o r d ‘ n ig g a ’ b u t l e f t i n th e w o r d

e x p la in s th e p h ilo s o p h y b e h in d h is

is r e a d y t o o u t p e r f o r m h is p r e v io u s

S t o le n M o m e n t s : R e d , H o t &

you

‘ w h ite y .’ ”

m a r i j u a n a u s e . “ I ’ v e b e e n u s in g

e x c u r s io n s . H is l y r ic s r e ta in a b i t

v o t e d T i m e m a g a z in e ’ s r e c o r d o f

W a t c h i n ’ c a b le in s e c lu s io n , ” th e

i n g s o c i a l c o m m e n t a r y , b u t th e

th e y e a r.

a lb u m , is b o u n d to

e a r th y g r o o v e h a s b e e n p o lis h e d to

The

F r a n t i’ s t h i r d s u c c e s s fu l b a n d ,

te e n

o u tre a c h

c o m in g a f t e r h is i n f l u e n t i a l s ta k e

A fr ic a n

in T h e B e a tn ig s a n d D is p o s a b le

P ro g ra m

p ro g ra m

A m e r ic a n o f

new

th e

Red

a lb u m

C o o l,

b ro a c h e s

is s u e s s u c h as th e A m e r ic a n j a i l

d a n c e a b le p e r fe c tio n . “ I lo v e th e o ld - s c h o o l s o u n d s o f a F e n d e r R h o d e s o r g a n - b a n g in g a g a in s t a t o u g h b a s s l i n e , ” s a y s

spent

your

w h o le

life

g ra b

som e

a tte n tio n . “ P e o p le a re s o p a r a n o id n o w

A n o t h e r t o p i c d e a lt w i t h o n

h e rb f o r a b o u t 1 2 y e a rs n o w . I f in d

th e a lb u m is th e u s e o f m a r iju a n a .

i t b r in g s m e c lo s e r t o m y c r e a tiv e

F r a n t i e x p la in s : “ T h is is b e c a u s e o f

s p ir it , j u s t l i k e p e y o te c a n .”

to be

“ W e ’ v e a ll g o t to le a r n to

p a s s e d n o w f o r th e m e d ic in a l u s e

s lo w th in g s d o w n . E v e n i f y o u w in

B i l l 2 1 5 w h ic h

is t r y i n g

s y s te m a n d th e O k la h o m a b o m b

th a t w e ’ re in h ib itin g

in g .

F r a n t i c o n te n d s . “ Y o u k n o w , i t ’ s

o f m a r iju a n a . W e m u s t e d u c a te o u r

th e r a t ra c e , y o u ’ re s t i l l a ra t. I

in te r e s tin g

c h ild r e n a b o u t s o m e th in g w h ic h

d o n ’ t w a n t to b e a r a t ! ”

W ith

ly r ic s

lik e

“ Yes

th a t o n

fre e d o m ,”

th e o n e w it h

[C h o c o la te

Jonesing for a straight answer with new McGill funksters o f th e m a re ju s t th e re f o r th e scene.

By Lyla M iller

R e g a rd le s s , th e b a n d lo v e s th a t th e y “ O u r n a m e k in d o f h a p p e n e d

r e c e iv e so m u c h s u p p o rt f r o m o th e r

b y a c c id e n t . . . W e w e r e j a m m i n g a n d

M c G i l l s tu d e n ts . A f t e r a ll, th e y see

c a llin g

U nknow n.

th e m s e lv e s as n o t j u s t a b a n d , b u t a

D o y o u e v e r w a t c h w r e s t li n g ? W e ll,

c o m p le te “ P a rk s id e J o n e s c o m m u

y o u k n o w , l i k e i n w r e s t li n g , t h e y ’ l l

n ity .”

o u r s e lv e s P a r t s

T h e c o m m u n ity ’ s a ll a b o u t

h a v e a r e a lly m e a n g u y c o m e o u t, ‘p a r t s

s t r iv in g f o r a c o lle c tiv e a r tis tic

u n k n o w n ’, t o m a k e h im s o u n d m y s

e f f o r t , w h e r e d i f f e r e n t p e o p le ca n

te r io u s .

c o m e u p o n s ta g e a n d p la y m u s ic

a n d t h e y ’ l l s a y h e ’s f r o m

T h a t ’s w h e r e

w e g o t it

w i t h th e m .

fr o m . T h e n o n e d a y s o m e b o d y m is

“ I t ’ s lik e o n o u r s tic k e r , th e re ’ s

h e a r d u s s a y i t a n d th e y th o u g h t w e w e r e c a lle d P a r k s id e

Jones.

th is g u y in th e b a c k g ro u n d , a s tre e t

m u s ic i a n . H e ’ s r e a l l y s m a ll a n d

l i k e d th a t, s o i t s tu c k . ”

h a rd to see, b u t h e ’ s th e re f o r a re a P a r k s id e J o n e s is o n e o f th e

s o n . T h a t re a s o n is , w e w a n te d h im

n e w e s t a n d b ig g e s t c r o w d - d r a w in g

t o b e th e r e . H e s y m b o lis e s e v e r y

M c G ill- b a s e d b a n d s . S e r v in g u p a

b o d y ’ s r ig h t to p la y m u s ic , w h o e v e r

fu n k y , e c le c tic g r o o v e -b a s e d d is h o f

y o u a r e . W e s u p p o r t th e id e a o f

r a w k a n d r o ll th a t m a k e s y o u w a n n a

w h o e v e r lik e s p la y in g m u s ic d o in g i t , ” says M a tt.

d a n c e , th e f i v e - m e m b e r b a n d ha s m a n a g e d to la n d a T h u rs d a y g ig at

W h i l e th e b a n d h a s g r a n d io s e

w o r k lo a d th is se m e ste r.

t h e n , b u t th e d a n c e f l o o r is s t i l l

W e e k ly p e rfo r m a n c e s a re a lo t

th e n e w ly o w n e d a n d re n o v a te d —

p a c k e d . T h e o w n e rs eve n m o v e d

o f p r e s s u r e , e s p e c i a l l y f o r th e s e

a n d le s s s m a r m y —

th e s o u n d b o o th to m a k e m o re ro o m

in g e n u e s . H a l f o f P a r k s id e J o n e s ’

f o r a ll th e b u m p e rs a n d g r in d e rs .

n u m b e rs a re c o v e rs . J a m m in g o u t a

s e r e n d ip ity o f i t a ll. “ I d o n ’ t k n o w .

d iv e r s e

The

W e j u s t s ta r te d p l a y i n g to g e t h e r ,

The

S t.

L a u re n t

P u r p le H a z e . c lu b

o ffe re d

P a r k s id e th e g i g a f t e r f i l l i n g

I n a c a n d id m o m e n t , b a s s is t C h r is

Johannsen

a d m its

th e

T h e m e m b e r s o f P a r k s id e a re

fu n k v o id le f t b y V o lt a ir e ’ s c lo s in g

r e lu c ta n t to c a te g o r is e th e m s e lv e s .

T e m p t a t io n s , J i m i H e n d r i x , T o m

a n d a ll o f a s u d d e n w e ’ re d o in g th is

o n ly th re e m o n th s a ft e r th e b a n d ’ s

T r u m p e t p la y e r /v o c a lis t/c o n g a p la y

W a it s , S te v ie W o n d e r a n d o th e r s ,

w e e k ly g ig . I t ’ s k in d o f s o o n .”

e r R y h n a T h o m p s o n in s is t s , “ W e

th e b a n d r e a lly w o u ld l ik e to w o r k

A n o th e r m e m b e r q u ic k ly in te r je c ts

b e lo n g to th e g e n re o f e n e rg y .”

o n m o re o f t h e ir o w n m a te r ia l, b u t

t h a t th e m o m e n t t h e y ’ re o n s ta g e

tim e d e n ie s .

p la y in g f o r th e c r o w d , i t ’ s a ll w o r t h

in c a r n a tio n in O c to b e r. A t

th e

fir s t

P a r k s id e /

m ix

tu n e s

F u n d e rw e a r d o u b le - b ill a b o u t 170

“ I t a in ’ t k le z m e r , b u t i t s h o ’ is

p e o p le , m o s t l y M c G i l l s tu d e n t s ,

f u n k y , ” e x p la in s M a t t L e d e r m a n ,

T h e s e a re b u s y p e o p le . T h e y

lin e d u p o n th e c o ld s tre e t o u ts id e .

w h o p la y s a c o u s tic g u it a r a n d le a d

p ra c tis e a m in im u m o f th re e tim e s a

v o c a ls .

w e e k , a n d th e y ’ v e h a d to t r im th e ir

T h e c r o w d h a s s h r u n k a b i t s in c e

id e a s a b o u t an e n tir e a r t is t ic c o n c e p t c o n s tr u c tin g

its e lf a ro u n d

th e m , th e y a re s u f f ic i e n t l y re la x e d a b o u t t h e ir fu t u r e p la n s . “ W e ’ re j u s t g o n n a k e e p o n p la y in g to g e th e r as lo n g a s w e f e e l l i k e i t . T h i s g i g c o u ld f a l l a p a rt t o m o r r o w b u t w e ’ d k e e p p l a y i n g b e c a u s e w e l i k e to . I t ’ s n o t a b o u t w h e r e y o u ’ re g o in g . T h e im p o r ta n t p a rt is th e p ro c e s s o f

it . W h ile

s o m e o f th e

r e g u la r

p a tro n s a re th e re f o r th e m u s ic , a lo t

g o in g s o m e w h e re .”

Page 20 E n t e r t a i n m e n t

February 11th, 1997 s w e e t s t r a w b e r r y ic e

tra te o n th e ta ste o f th e fo o d y o u ’ re

c re a m . T h e m o s t e x o t ic s e le c tio n s

e a t in g , c h e c k o u t th e A fg h a n e s e

th e tic a lly

l e

By Aaron Rollins and Rachel Stokoe

i n

(

i a

l s

c o m e fr o m th e T e x M e x m e n u ( T e x

K h y b e r P a ss. Y o u c a n c o u n t o n a

M e x is c o d e f o r : p o u r c h i l i o v e r

q u ie t e v e n in g ( e x c e p t o n S u n d a y s

fo o d ). B e s t o f a ll, y o u ca n b o n d

w h e n M i d d l e E a s t e r n m u s ic ia n s

o v e r a tw in - s t r a w e d , t h ic k s h a k e

e n liv e n th e h a ll) , w h e r e th e w a ite rs

T h is t y p e o f e a t in g d o e s n ’ t le a v e

a m e n u th a t im p lo r e s y o u to c h e c k

(c o m p le te w it h s ta in le s s s te e l s h a k

a re f r ie n d ly b u t k n o w w h e n to g iv e

r o o m f o r a n y m is ta k e s ; i f o n e o f th e

o u t th e c o u n t e r f o r th e F o n z . T h e

e r !) w o r th y o f a ra c y L e a v e i t to

y o u p r iv a c y , a n d y o u c a n f lo p d o w n

d is h e s is a l i t t l e t o o o l i v e y , j u s t

” 5 0 s, w h e n lo v e c o u ld b e fo u n d a t

B e a v e r e p is o d e . O n l y i n Q u e b e c

th e ir

cushy

couches

p o s t-

(o n e o f m e n u ’ s d e s e rt

o r d e r u p a n o t h e r . R a n g in g f r o m

S h ir b e r g e

a d a te , V .D . c a n b e c o m e a c u l i n a r y

s e a fo o d a n d g a m e m e a ts t o v e g g ie

o ff e r in g s ) . T h e d e c o ra tio n s are t y p i

o d y s s e y . N o t m a n y p e o p le w a n t to

d is h e s , th e f la v o u r is s tro n g , a n d th e

c a lly A fg h a n e s e , b u t n o t o v e rb e a r

r i s k d is a p p o i n t m e n t w it h th e g i l d e d

fr e e fr e s h b re a d k e e p s th e s to m -

F o r th o s e l u c k y e n o u g h t o f i n d

ach

p o m p o s ity o f M o n t r e a l ’s

S e le c tio n s

f i n e s t , b u t, c l e a r l y , E u r o D e li ju s t

w on

do.

a c id s

9-ood

in g ly e x o tic k its c h . T h e e a rth -to n e d s to n e f l o o r a n d t a p e s t r y p i l l o w s

bay.

s u m m a ris e th e la id - b a c k v ib e o f th is

in c lu d e

b e lo w s tre e t-le v e l fin d .

e s c a rg o ts d r o w n e d in

D o n ’ t e x p e c t a n y th in g y o u

a c re a m sau ce a n d

le m o n g a r lic c h ic k

know

e n . T h e sau ces te n d

m e n u s , e x c e p t f o r th e b r o c h e t te s .

to b e h e a v y b u t th e

T h e r e ’ s n o p o in t in t r y i n g to d e c i

p o r tio n s ize s m a k e sure

p h e r t h e l i s t , j u s t a s k th e w a i t e r

y o u d o n ’ t le a v e w i t h th a t

w h a t t o o r d e r a n d y o u ’ l l b e in f o r

f i r s t d a t e - k i l l i n g b lo a t . T h e e n t ir e

o n e o f th e t a s t ie s t m e a ls a r o u n d .

C a s a T a p a s , 266 R a c h e l E .

e x p e rie n c e , e s p e c ia lly w h e n in fu s e d

A m o n g o u r o w n o ff e r in g s w e re th e

(8 4 8 - 1 0 6 3 )

w it h a j u g o f th e ir h o u s e s a n g ria , is

B o r a n i E g g p la n t a n d M a n to o — tw o

V e g g ie -f r ie n d ly , b u t c o u n t on b e in g s ig n if ic a n t ly lim it e d P r i c e : h o v e r in g b e t w e e n $ 3 0 -4 0 ( S a n g r ia in c l.)

a c o n v e rs a tio n in its e lf, w i t h c h a rm

e n tre e s s e rv e d w it h a d e lic a te m in t

W h e th e r i t ’s a r is k y

f i r s t d a te , p u p p y lo v e , o r

lo n g - s ta n d in g

lo v e - in ,

t h e r e ’s

r e s ta u ra n t o u t th e re m e e t y o u r needs.

th a t w i l l fo llo w

o r c a n p r o n o u n c e o n th e

a n d g a r lic y o g o u r t sau ce. T h e m a in

y o u o u t o f th e

c o u rs e s a re c e n tr e d a r o u n d g r il l e d

re s ta u ra n t a n d in to th e n e x t da te. Kevin Koch

E a s t - e n d g r i l l s a n d w e s t - s id e b u r g e r s

m e a ts

and

v e g e t a b le s

w ith

A fg h a n e s e s p ic e s a n d a n a s s o rtm e n t

G a la x ie , 4 8 0 1 S t . D e n is ( 4 9 9 - 9 7 1 1 ) F ir s t-d a te rs w i l l a p p re c ia te th e

A b o u t a s v e g g ie -f r ie n d ly a s g lo r i

th e d im e -s to r e fo u n ta in a n d th e fe a r

c o u ld

s e n tim e n t a l

o f ric e s . M u c h l i k e th e d e c o r a tio n ,

fo r c e o f th is re s ta u r a n t’ s p e r s o n a li

f ie d f a s t -f o o d c a n g e t ( r e a d : n o t ve ry ) P r ic e : a r o u n d $ 2 0

o f th e h o le in th e o z o n e la y e r d id n ’ t

A m e r ic a n a b e s e rv e d u p b y a s t a f f

th e f o o d a n d s p ic in g is u n iq u e , b u t

lo o m o v e r y o u r f i r s t k is s , is a liv e

th a t spe aks l i t t l e to n o E n g lis h .

n o t p a in f u lly so. T h e fre s h in g r e d i

ty . W it h th e flo o r - s h a k in g F la m e n c o tr o u b a d o u r s b o x in g i n th e a lr e a d y c o s y p a tro n s , i t ’ s h a rd to h a v e m o re

a ll

th is

e n ts a n d te n d e r m e a ts d o n ’ t w e ig h

a n d w e l l o n t h is S t. D e n is c o r n e r . W h a t b e tte r w a y to fo s te r th e s ta r ry -

K h y b e r P a s s , 4 1 3 5 S t . D e n is

d o w n th e p a la te , a n d th e f la v o u r is

th a n s m a ll t a l k a b o u t th e s a n g r ia -

T h o s e s t i l l f a w n in g o v e r th e

e y e d o p t im is m o f y o u r in f a t u a t io n

(8 4 4 - 7 1 3 1 )

c le a n . K h y b e r Pass a ls o o ffe r s c o u

s w i l l i n g c o u p le s s u r r o u n d in g y o u .

w a y s /h e p o u rs th e m i l k a n d m a r v e l

th a n w i t h th e r e lic s o f a d e c a d e th a t

V e g g ie -f r ie n d ly

p le s p e c ia ls ( w h i c h in c lu d e w in e )

T h e d e c o r a tio n s a re “ e t h n ic ” c h ic ,

lin g a t h o w th e F e b ru a ry sun c a tc h

e s p o u s e d th e sa m e n a iv e té ? T h e fa re

P r ic e : $ 3 0 -4 0 ( in c l. w in e )

a n d t w o ta b le d ’ h ô te s e le c tio n s , as

a n d w i l l h o ld y o u r g a z e t h r o u g h

es h is / h e r e y e w i l l lo v e th e s e n t i

a l l o w s f o r d is p la y s o f m a c h is m o

th o s e e m b a rra s s in g s ile n c e s .

m e n ta l c a m p o f G a la x ie . U p o n

w ith b u ffa lo m e a t c h e e s e b u rg e rs

I f y o u r r e la t i o n s h i p is e s ta b

e n te r in g a c h r o m e w in n e b a g o - lik e

a n d u l t r a - g i r l ie s t r u t t in g w i t h s y n -

lis h e d e n o u g h th a t y o u c a n c o n c e n -

T a p a s f o r c e s i n t i m a c y b y it s m e a ls c o n s is t o f a

r e tr o re s to , y o u a n d y o u r lo v e b u n n y

h a lf-d o z e n o r so S p a n is h a p p e tis e rs

w i l l b e in u n d a t e d w i t h p i n k - c l a d

ch o se n fro m

w a itre s s e s , ta b le s id e ju k e b o x e s , a n d

v e r y n a tu r e —

a n e x t e n s iv e m e n u .

w e l l as v e g e t a r ia n d is h e s th a t f i t

T he W o n d e r B o o k o f Sex

B y G le n B a x te r P u b lis h e r: V illa r d B o o k s 4 8 p p . , illu s tra te d , $ 1 7 .9 5

v e r y c o m fo r ta b ly in t o a s tu d e n t b u d g e t.

g e t d o w n o n m y knees and p ra y ...”

30. “ H e ’ l l g iv e u p a ll h is c o n fid e n c e /

14. “ I m e t a b o y and a b o y m e t m e /

A n d sleep o u t in the ra in / I f she says

A n d w e g o t to g e th e r and m ade a b a b y

th a t’ s the w a y i t sh o u ld be ...”

/ A n d I d id n ’ t w a n t i t and n e ith e r d id

31. “ I can see m y ra in b o w c a llin g m e

he / B u t h e re c o m e s b o u n c in g b a b y

/ T h r o u g h th e m is ty d re a m s o f m y

J u lie / A n d th a t su cks...”

w a te rfa ll...”

15. “ I d o n ’ t n e e d to be fo r g iv e n f o r By

now

y o u ’ ve

p la n n e d

re a l

lo v in g y o u so m u c h / I t ’ s w r itte n in

C a s s a n o v a ? D o y o u r V a le n tin e s m e lt

th e s c rip tu re s / I t ’ s w ritte n in b lo o d ...”

C an

your

V a l e n t in e ’ s D a y d r e a m d a te in e x c r u c ia t in g

you

d e e - ja y

lik e

d e ta il. T h e fo o d w i l l b e s a v o u ry , b u t lig h t. T h e m u s ic w i l l b e s tir r in g , y e t

u p o n h e a r in g th e l y r i c a l r o m a n c e o f

16. “ I d o n 't w a n t to see / W o n ’ t yo u

u n o b tru s iv e . T h e sex w i l l be... d a m n — th e m is s in g d e ta il. Y o u r frie n d s can

y o u r m u s ic a l s e le c t io n ? D o y o u r

w ra p the n ig h t / A ro u n d m e .”

T h e p u b lis h in g in d u s try un d e rs ta n d s y o u r p a in , o r pe rhap s y o u r s p e n d in g

‘ lo v e s o n g s ’ k e e p t h e ir p r o m is e w h e n

17 . “ W h e n th e o n ly s o u n d in th e

aSpajS A o ja j

W e l l, t h e r e ’ s

e m p ty s tre e t / Is th e h e a v y tre a d o f

,,‘ u b iu o m y saA og unyq y u a q w , o£

lo v e in th e s o n g

th e h e a vy fe e t / T h a t b e lo n g to a lo n e

th e y

have

r e c e iv e d ,

m o re th a n a lit t l e

t h e y ’ re

a n s w e rin g i t e n m a s s e . T h e re are

t n o A g u a -ig m

a r e ta k e n . L o v e r s o f th e w o r ld , n a m e

18. “ I d o n ’ t w a n t a g ir l in s h o rt w a v e

th a t tu n e !

/ I d o n ’ t w a n t a g ir l in m o n o / I ju s t

°9 M 3 9 1 ..‘ .m d a s g J0d L U!V 3 x o g „ '8 2 sreag t o g s re s g

w h ic h th e f o l l o w i n g l y r ic s

w a n t a g ir l o n the ra d io ...”

n o less th a n th re e sex m a n u a ls fo r th e ... u m , ‘ a m a te u r’ c u r r e n tly o n th e m a rk e t. T h e . . . F o r B e g in n e r s s e r ie s , p r a is e d as th e q u ic k e s t, ea sie st p a th to e n lig h te n m e n t w ith such

v o lu m e s

“ M ao

For

se rie s —

h a v in g am a s s e d a f o r

tu n e c a p ita lis in g o n th e c o m p u te ras “ D O S F o r D u m m ie s ” — has b e g u n e x p lo itin g th e s e x -in e p t as w e ll, w it h th e c le v e r ly title d “ S ex F o r D u m m ie s .” W e , th e s ta ff o f th e T r ib u n e , c a n n o t re c o m m e n d ( o r c o n d o n e ) e ith e r o f these b o o k s . O u r c o v e te d seal o f a p p ro v a l goes in ste a d to G le n B a x te r’ s T h e W o n d e r B o o k o f S ex.

D o e s th is

b o o k o f f e r t e c h n iq u e s t h a t th e o th e rs ig n o re ? Is i t m o re u p -to -d a te ? D o e s i t in c lu d e a n a to m y c h a rts? P ro v e n o n th e p la y in g fie ld ? N o , n o , n o , a n d no. O u r so le re ason f o r re c o m m e n d in g th is b o o k is th a t th e y g a ve i t to us f o r fre e . T h e p u b lis h e rs o f th e o th e r tw o b o o k s o n the lis t fa ile d to c o n s id e r th e T r ib u n e ’ s p o w e rs o f p u b lic ity a n d n e i th e r c o m p a n y b o th e re d to send us a p r o m o tio n a l c o p y . T h e b o o k it s e lf is a m ild ly a m u s in g te x t, p re s e n te d in th e m a n n e r o f an illu s tra te d c h ild r e n ’ s b o o k , w ith o n ly s lig h tly m o re s u b v e rs iv e s u b je c t m a tte r. T h e W o n d e r B o o k o f S e x w o n ’ t te a ch y o u a n y th in g y o u d o n ’ t a lre a d y k n o w

(y o u a r e a w a re th a t th e e lb o w is th e e ro g e n o u s z o n e o f c h o ic e a m o n g m o s t S am o ans, a re n ’ t y o u ? ) n o r is i t lik e ly to f i t w it h in y o u r p r ic e ra n g e ($ 1 8 f o r a 4 0 -p a g e p a p e rb a c k ). I t re m a in s , h o w e v e r, th e o n ly “ h o w to ” m a n u a l th a t the T r ib u n e ca n , in g o o d fa ith , re c o m m e n d to o u r re a d e rs o n th a t s p e cia l n ig h t.

H e re ’ s to an e v e n in g o f p a ssio n , ro m a n c e , an d a c a rin g , h e a rtfe lt “ th a t’ s o k a y , h o n e y , w e ’ l l tr y a g a in la te r.” — K r i s M ic h a u d

19. “ I n e v e r d id b e lie v e in m ira c le s /

he arta che / W e stand / N o p ro m ise s,

B u t I ’ ve a fe e lin g i t ’ s tim e to tr y / I

,/ a A o g j o s p a a s a q x S u i m o s ,, ' L l a p a n s ,,‘ja A o g | b i u i u v „ '9 2

n o d e m and s...”

n e v e r d id b e lie v e in th e w a y s o f

s a s o g a u o js „ ‘3 A o g a u o „ ' S I

m a g ic / B u t I ’ m b e g in n in g to w o n d e r

“ M onday

and

Tuesday

stapBAy a q j

w h y ...”

N X a p B jq q o g ,x ,a A o g s iq x s i „ -p z

H a rry , M a r k and Jo h n ...”

20 . L ik e a m o th to a fla m e / B u rn e d

3. “ I d o n ’ t need y o u r sw eet d e v o tio n /

b y th e fir e / M y lo v e is b lin d / C a n ’ t

I d o n ’ t w a n t y o u r c h e a p e m o tio n /

y o u see m y d e sire ...”

s q jitu s a q j, „ ‘ 3 k 9 p s A o g Ip o q a u to s I B q x j u iB a jQ j j q 3 t N IS B g ,, £ 2 s ta p u a ja jg

Just

in e p t w it h su ch e n g a g in g v o lu m e s

aA og X [u o „

1. “ W e a re y o u n g / H e a r ta c h e to

W e d n e sd a y th ro u g h T h u rs d a y / W ith

B e g in n e rs .” T h e . . . F o r D u m m ie s

S uno y. IP N «‘J re a jj

som e co p / 1 o p e n sho p.”

t it le s f r o m

p o w e r, b u t w h a te v e r m essage

a a u a u a d x g x u p u a jj t u i i f a q i ,,‘ a A o g a g I b jm s j q x „ g £

th e m o m e n t a r is e s ?

h e lp y o u ch o o s e th e r ig h t “ m a k e o u t” m u s ic , a n d y o u r lo c a l re s ta u ra n t w i l l c o v e r th e d in n e r, b u t w h o ca n y o u tu r n to f o r th e a d v ic e th a t y o u r e a l l y need?

F u lfillm e n t:

w h ip

som e

d ra g o n

21.

“ C lim b e d

over

m o u n t a in

391

,.‘ ^ P ° 1

s ta A o g ,,

'2 2

XaAiBH

lo tio n ...”

T ra v e lle d at sea / C ast o u t o f h e aven /

4. “ L o v e — e x c itin g and n e w / C o m e

C ast d o w n o n m y kne es...”

ab o a rd / W e ’ re e x p e c tin g y o u ...”

22. “ I kisse d th e eyes o f m y b a b y / I

f d „ ‘ 3 A o g Xjv n o A S u u g o x „ 12 UOSjpBf jaU B f

5 . “ E v e r y tim e I g e t h ig h / Y o u

s a id d re a m , d re a m , d re a m , b a b y a ll

„ ‘ s a o o 3 A o g Xb m

w a n n a g o d o w n / E v e ry tim e I get up

n ig h t lo n g ...”

/ Y o u say y o u w a n t to g o d o w n ...”

23. “ N o hope —

6 . “ T a k e i t o f f / B a b y , ta ke i t a ll o f f / 1

a n o th e r fa ls e a la rm ...”

w a n t g o th e w a y y o u ca m e in to th is

24. “ W e ’ l l be to g e th e r / W ith th e r o o f

OUFS ,.‘ 3 u 0 S ' n g o ip B y ,, '§1 j a y o g a p o ..'o p s t o j 3 A o g „ '/_[

w o r ld ... / I d o n ’ t w a n n a fe e l no

r ig h t o v e r o u r heads / W e ’ l l share the

Z D „ ‘ss 3 u p u ijg s i a A o g „ 91

c lo t h e s

sh e lte r o f m y s in g le b e d ...”

/ I do n’ t wanna

se e n o

n o h a rm / J u s t

p a n tie s...”

25. “ S h o w m e y o u r v is io n / Y o u w ild

7 . “ M o n d a y y o u c o u ld f a l l a p a rt /

a p p a ritio n / A n d s in g to th e de pths o f

T u e s d a y , W e d n e s d a y , b re a k m y

y o u r so u l...”

he art...”

2 6 . “ I k n o w y o u ’ ve be en in s id e b u t

8 . “ I g iv e in / T o sin / B ecause I lik e

w h a t w e re y o u in fo r ...”

to p ra ctise w h a t I p re a ch ...”

27. “ H ig h tim e w e m ade a stand and

,,‘ u n g

S u iA o g

a q g s .r e q x ,, '0 2 SBjAi p o o /A ja a y

a g B jM

noA„

'6 1

u a q o g p re u o a g ,/a A o g to g a jn g o n j . u iy , , £1 Ip p B O uU a jA j ,,‘a A o g u j S u ta g ,, ' p [ ta p jO A tajq t l‘ a [ § u B u x a A o g a t r e z ig , , • £ ]

W 3 'd „‘3 Aog I a u o aq x „ 21 u ig a d a z p a g u‘a A o g B jjo g a p q /w ,, • 1 [ s a u o is S u q jo g <t‘ 8 u o Jts s i 3 A o g „ 'o i

9. “ H o w d o y o u say d e lic io u s / D e -

s h o o k u p th e v ie w s o f th e c o m m o n

lo v e ly / D e le c ta b le / D iv in e ? ? ? ”

m a n / A n d th e lo v e tra in rid e s fr o m

ajq-aaa<g \g , 3 A o g s i regAV,, '6

10. “ Y o u ’ re so sw eet / A n d som eday

coa st to co a st / D J ’ s the m a n w e lo v e

babe / W e ’ ve g o t to m e e t...”

th e m o s t...”

apopq aqaadaQ ,,‘aAOiaSuBjJs,, '8 a jn g a q x „ ‘3 A o g iq t u g ‘ /fe p u g ,,

11. “ Y o u need c o o lin ’ / I a in ’ t f o o lin ’

2 8 . “ L a y in g o n m y b a c k in n e w ly

m o w n grass / R a in is c o m in g d o w n

G onna

send

you

back

fo r

s c h o o lin ’ ....”

b u t I k n o w th e c lo u d s ’ l l pass...”

12. “ A s im p le p ro p / T o o c c u p y m y

2 9 . “ W h e n y o u w e re y o u n g a n d o n

tim e ...”

y o u r o w n / H o w d id i t f e e l t o b e

13. “ E v e r y tim e I see y o u f a llin g / I

alo n e ...”

ajtqAS. l i r e g tt‘a p B u ajas 3 A o g „ '9 S1!®N

q a u j autfq , / 3 Aoq a g B jq

umoq

jary,, 'g

i v o g a x c r j o j a u ia q x p

BddBZ q u B jg ,,‘SAog X y iQ ,, '£

p a a g n o g „‘3 Aog j o a iq | 3)BS„ '2 re jB u a g red I p p r p ii r e g b s i aAog,, •[

page 2 i

E n te r ta in m e n t

February 11th, 1997

McGill prof Bristol on Shakespeare’s “sheer vulgar celebrity” Continued from Page 1 S u c h a s t o u n d in g , l o n g - t e r m c e le b rity begs th e q u e s tio n tru m p e te d across th e b o o k ’ s fla s h y b a c k c o v e r:

w o rk s , w h a t B r is to l te rm s “ h is in tu

W i t h d e ta ile d c o m m e n t a r y o n

c e a s e le s s ly p o r t r a y e d w i t h i n th e

w it h h is la n g u a g e n o r th e a c t o f re ad

it io n s a b o u t th e p a th o s o f w e s te rn

H a m le t, O t h e llo , a n d T h e W in t e r ’ s

m e d ia . T h e se ic o n s d o n o t n e c e s s a rily

in g it , b u t w ith th e “ h o rrib le , p a in fu l,

m o d e rn ity ,” h e lp s e x p la in th e B a r d ’ s

T a le , B r is to l a rtic u la te s e x a c tly w h a t

r e f l e c t th e e s s e n c e o f h is w r i t t e n

a n g u is h in g s to rie s ” o f th e p la y s .

lo n g -te r m c u ltu ra l a u th o rity .

it is th a t S hakespeare k n e w a n d w ro te

p la y s . R a th e r, th e y

a b o u t th e s o c ia l a n d c u ltu ra l past. T h e

a re o fte n c o n s tr u c

th a n

p la y s are a b le to address s o c ia l issues

t io n s o f a c u l t u r a l

S h a k e s p e a re

th a t e x te n d b e y o n d E liz a b e th a n c u l

in d u s try .

film

Is S hake spea re g re a t, o r is i t a ll ju s t h y p e ? W h a t is i t a b o u t S h a k e s p e a re t h a t m akes

h im

b o th

c o n c e rte d — a n d success f u l — response.

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to S hake spea re in th e a tric a l a n d p r in t

s a tu r a tio n

th e d if fic u lt ie s .”

m e d ia .

m o d e r n e x is t e n c e

“ N o to r ie ty d o e s n ’ t

c o m e fr o m ju s t n o th in g ,” h e e x p la in s . “ In th e case o f S h a ke sp e a re , i t c o m e s fro m th e fa c t th a t so m e o f th e sto rie s he w a n ts to te ll us h a v e a p a r tic u la r k in d o f re so n a n c e .”

th e

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M I C 1 I U L

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d is e n ta n g le s w ith

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B y M ic h a e l D . B ris to l

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H a m le t an d eve n

P u b lis h e r: R o u d e d g e

S h a k e s p e a re as a

m a in ta in s B ris to l.

R om eo

256 p p .

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the d a z z lin g lig h ts

r e f l e c t th e n e e d s

ra b le q u a litie s o f S hakespeare — h is

o f co n s u m e rs . O u r ne ed f o r ae sth e tic

o f p u b lic s c ru tin y f o r fo u r c e n tu rie s

o w n p o rtra it, th e s k u ll in H a m le t , th e

re -p a c k a g in g s o f S hakespeare, B r is to l

a n d c o u n tin g .

m is q u o t e d h a lf - l i n e s —

says, stem s fr o m o u r d iffic u lt ie s , n o t

a re th o s e

The Offspring and Silverchair

F a c u ltie s o f A rts

A w a it e d r e t u r n o f th e o n e - a lb u m

a n d o f S c ie n c e

A r e th e k i d s s t i l l a l r i g h t ?

th e

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T h e m o s t e n d u rin g a n d m e m o

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our

in d u s tr y ,

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th e

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“ S hake spea re has n e v e r d e p e n d

w e p a y a tt e n t io n to th e

“I

i t is c e r ta in ly n o t tie d to th e fu tu re o f

a d a p ta tio n s.

p la y s , m o v ie s o r S a tu rd a y

th is

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S h a k e s p e a r e c la im s th a t

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fo r

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B i g - t i m e

v e ry

has s o m e th in g to d o

F r o m h is i n i t i a l r e c e p t io n in

B r i s t o l ’ s b o o k is a

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tu re , h e w rite s , be cause th e y p re s e n t

“ M o re

w o n d e rs

T h e w o r l d ’s te e n a g e r s

M o y s e T r a v e llin g S c h o la r s h ip

g o t a t r e a t l a s t w e e k w h e n n e w a lb u m s b y S i l v e r c h a i r a n d T h e O f f s p r i n g w e r e s i m u l t a n e o u s l y r e le a s e d . B o t h b a n d s h a v e p a r t i c u l a r a p p e a l t o th e o h - s o - f i c k l e d e m o

A p p lic a t io n s a re n o w b e in g a c c e p t e d f o r t h e M o y s e

g r a p h i c o f a d o le s c e n c e . S i lv e r c h a ir a r e te e n a g e r s

T r a v e llin g S c h o la r s h ip . O n e s c h o la r s h ip f o r d is t in c t io n

t h e m s e lv e s w h o c a t a p u l t e d o n t o

w ill b e a w a rd e d to a s t u d e n t in th e F a c u lt y o f A r t s a n d

s c e n e w it h

th e in t e r n a t io n a l

w h a t w i l l s u r e l y s t a n d o u t a s o n e o f th e

w o rs t s u b -s u b -P e a rl Ja m “ T o m o rro w . ”

songs

o f th e

t h e o t h e r f o r d is t in c t io n b y F a c u lt y o f S c ie n c e . T h e

1 9 9 0 ’ s,

T h e O f fs p r in g , a lo n g w it h G r e e n D a y ,

s c h o la r s h ip is in t e n d e d t o s u p p o r t a y e a r o f a d v a n c e d

1 9 9 4 ’s S m a s h h it s

s t u d y , p r e f e r a b ly i n a B r it is h o r E u r o p e a n u n iv e r s it y .

b r o u g h t p o p - p u n k t o th e k i d s w i t h “ C o m e O u t A n d P la y ’’ a n d

“ S e lf - E s te e m .”

W i l l th e

V a lu e :

k id s d is p la y t h e ir s h o r t a tte n tio n s p a n s a n d s e n d o u r h e ro e s to o b s c u r ity o r w i l l th e y m a k e la s t in g ic o n s o f t h e m ? T h e T r ib u n e a s s e r t s i t s c r i t i c a l c l o u t t o p i c k a n d

A rts

$ 8 ,0 0 0

to $ 1 2 ,0 0 0

S c ie n c e

$ 4 ,0 0 0

to $ 8 ,0 0 0

A p p lic a t io n in s tr u c tio n s a n d f u l l d e ta ils o f th e s c h o la rs h ip are

p a n a ll th a t c o rp o ra te r o c k p a n d e rs f o r 1 9 9 7 .

a v a ila b le f r o m D a w s o n H a l l , R o o m 2 1 6 .

D e a d lin e : A p r il 1 , 1 9 9 7

T h e O f f s p r in g Ix n a y O n T h e H o m b re

( C o lu m b ia ) A f t e r s e llin g o u t t h e ir in d ie r e c o r d la b e l t o e n te r th e m a jo r s , T h e O f f s p r i n g r e tu r n w i t h I x n a y O n T h e

S il v e r c h a ir

The Red H erring

F re a k S how

( E p ic )

H o m b r e . A lt h o u g h a s tr o n g , “ C o m e O u t A n d P la y ” -

l i k e s in g le is m is s in g , th e C a lif o r n ia p u n k b a n d c a n d o w it h o u t o n e th a n k s t o th e m a s s iv e fa n b a se o f m o s h in g 1 4 - y e a r - o ld s e s ta b lis h e d w i t h t h e ir z i l l i o n s e lle r . T h e q u e s tio n is w h e t h e r th e k id s w i l l d ig th e a lb u m . T h e y s h o u ld .

T h e “ s ilv e r ” k id s o f A u s t r a lia a re lo s in g t h e ir lu s tr e , a n d lo s in g i t fa s t. S ilv e r c h a ir ’ s s e c o n d a lb u m c o n

w a n ts you to g e t involved in th e s e

fo r m s to th e a ll- t o o - f a m i l i a r g r u n g e /a lte m a tiv e f o r m u

3 CONTESTS

la . W h a t u s e d t o s o u n d s p a r k lin g n o w s o u n d s ta r n is h e d a n d o ld . C o n s e q u e n t ly , F r e a k S h o w s a m p le s s e r v e

I x n a y ’ s s o n g s e x p e r t ly s tra d d le th e fe n c e b e tw e e n

h u m m a b ilit y a n d m o s h a b ilit y —

a m ix c u r r e n t ly

fa v o u r e d b y th e m a in s tre a m . F la t- o u t C a lif o r n ia p u n k ha s b e c o m e a l i t t l e t ir e d o v e r th e la s t f if t e e n y e a rs , b u t T h e O f f s p r in g d o i t w e ll. A n d , in a m o v e t o d is ta n c e th e m s e lv e s f r o m G re e n D a y , T h e O f f s p r in g a tta c k a p a th y w it h s o n g s s u c h as “ C o o l T o H a te ” ( th is is ir o n y , k id s ) a n d “ A l l I W a n t.”

m o r e as a n ill- b u r n e d s a c r if ic ia l la m b to p a s t g r u n g e g o d s th a n as a n o f f e r in g o f a n y th in g n e w to th e sce n e . “ A b u s e M e ,” “ L i e T o M e , ” “ S la v e ” a re s o n g s th a t a im

t e l l i n g th a t T h e O f f s p r in g a re m o s t in te r e s tin g w h e n t h e y e s c a p e th e s t y l i s t i c p r is o n th a t p u n k r o c k h a s b e c o m e . T h e y d o t h is m o s t o b v io u s ly o n “ G o n e A w a y , ” w h ic h a p p ro p ria te s c h e e s y la te - 8 0 ’ s h a ir - m e ta lis m s , a n d o n “ A m a z e d ,” w h ic h d o e s th e s a m e w i t h p o s t- P e a r l J a m ‘ a lt e r n a t iv e ’ r o c k . I t m a y b e t im e f o r T h e O f f s p r in g t o s e ll o u t t h e ir p u n k r o o ts in th e n a m e o f c r e a tiv ity .

Rem ake ( it

F o r th e p a s t f o u r y e a rs , th e a lte m a -s n a k e ha s b e e n

th e

d o e s n 't

w o r ld have

any to

w ay m ake

you

w ant

sense)

e a t in g it s o w n t a i l w i t h e x t i n c t i o n in s ig h t . T h i t h e r S ilv e r c h a ir i f th e y d o n ’ t f i n d a n ic h e to c a ll t h e ir o w n . F r e a k S h o w in c lu d e s

I x n a y O n T h e H o m b r e is a s o lid a lb u m , b u t i t ’ s

t o a p p r o x im a te m e n to r N ir v a n a .

2 )

W r it e

(th o u g h

13 s o n g s ; s o m e a re s lo w , b u t

e v e n m o r e th r a s h w i t h s la m m in g g u it a r w o r k , c h a o tic

and

i t

r h y th m s , a n d th e C o b a in - e s q u e s ty le o f v o c a ls , m o s t

re a l

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r e a lly i t ' l l can

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V a le n t in e a

lit t le

a n y t h in g

b it o r

la t e

anyone,

im a g in a r y )

n o tic e a b le o n “ L e a r n T o H a te ” a n d “ R o s e s .” I t ’ s a re p a c k a g in g o f K u r t C o b a in as a n a n g s t- r id d e n , te e n a g e A u s s ie . S ilv e r c h a ir u s e s th e s a m e

T e ll (o f

e v e ry o n e any

about

yo u r

b ru sh

w it h

fa m e

k in d )

m e lo d ie s , th e s a m e l o o k , th e s a m e d e liv e r y . I f o n ly g r u n g e r o c k w o u ld d is a p p e a r a lto g e th e r . I f o n ly S ilv e r c h a ir s ta y e d in s c h o o l. — C h r is C o lle y

B e F u n n y , B e W e ir d , a n d M a k e O t h e r s L a u g h

— S a m u e l L a p a lm e - R e m is

Tr i bune e n t e r t a i n me n t w r i t e r s ’ meet i ng T h u r s d a y at 5 : 3 0

Shatner 303, 398-6825 Submissions due by March 14

22 E n t e r t a i n m e n t

Page

February 11th, 1997

Industrial Light and Magic overhauls “The Force” N e w c o m p u t e r - g e n e r a te d s p e c ia l e ffe c ts r e v a m p th e S t a r W a rs t r i l o g y a n d g iv e n e w lif e to th e 2 0 - y e a r - o ld le g e n d f ir s t C G - h a ir in J u m a n ji.

T w e n ty L u c a s ’ film

y e a rs

ago,

S ta r W a rs

G e o rg e

s tir r e d th e

im a g in a tio n s o f v ie w e r s a r o u n d th e w o r ld . N o w , w i t h th e re -re le a s e o f th e o r ig in a l tr ilo g y , m a y th e fo rc e be w ith a w h o le n e w g e n e ra tio n v ie w

H a r r is o n F o r d ) a n d J a b a th e H u t t

th e fo o ta g e th a t h a d be en film e d tw o

e ffe c t s h o w s th e c ity e x p a n d in g in to

I n r e c e n t y e a r s , th e s p e c ia l

( p la y e d b y a s ta n d - in a c to r ) . T h is

d e c a d e s a g o , b u t th e s o u n d o f th e

th e h o riz o n a n d in c lu d e s m a n y m o re

e ffe c ts in d u s try has p u rs u e d a p a th o f

p a r t ic u la r sce n e w a s le f t o u t in th e

o r ig in a l a c to r h a d to b e re m o v e d , a n d

pa sse rs-b y.

s u b tle r s p e c ia l e ffe c ts . F o r e x a m p le ,

o r ig in a l p r o d u c tio n d u e to te c h n ic a l

a n e w v o ic e o v e rla id .

th e te c h n iq u e s o f lim b re m o v a l p io

d if fic u lt ie s . A c o m p u te r g ra p h ic o f a

T h e S t a r W a r s T r i l o g y S p e c ia l

E d itio n is th e set o f f ilm s th a t L u c a s o n ly d r e a m t o f c re a tin g , b u t la c k e d the tim e , m o n e y a n d te c h n o lo g y the

n e e r e d in F o r r e s t G u m p a re n o w

s lu g - lik e Jaba w a s in s e rte d in to o r ig

th e f i l m

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changes w e ’ ve m ade have been

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c o m p u te r

g r a p h ic s ( T e r m i n a t o r 2 : J u d g e m e n t D a y ),

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is tic ch a ra c te rs w ith C G -s k in , m u s c le a n d te x tu re ( J u r a s s ic P a r k ) , a n d the

d e p ic te d ,” “ V ir t u a lly

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tio n s o f te ll- ta le o p tic a l e ffe c ts , th e

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th e s e

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p u te r g ra p h ic s .

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20th Century Fox fo r a w h ile lo n g e r ye t.

A p p le P o w e r B o o k 1 4 0 0

in c r e a s e d p e r f o r m a n c e a n d n e w fe a t u r e s . S e v e r a l m o d e ls

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• PowerPC 603e, 18 0 M H z’ • 16 M B RAM • 1.6 G B H a rd D isk • 8 x C D ROM • 2 8 .8 F a x A b ic c /M o d e m • SRS S u rro u n d S oun d

The MCS is a not-for-profit store operated by McGill University to serve its students and staff.

• PCI Bus

Authorized ^ Prices arcsubject tochangewithout notice. EducationSalesAgent Appleand theApplelogoare registeredtrademarks ofAppleComputer Inc.

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Sports

February 11th , 1 9 9 7

Page 23

Martlets basketball flies high over Ravens and Gee Gees By A ron To n o n

te a m a n d th e y w e r e a b le t o p l a y

n o - l o o k p a s s e s . “ T h e y p la y e d u s

w ith

to u g h to n ig h t, so i t w a s a g o o d

u s a t th e b e g i n n i n g , ”

coach

b a l l te a m g o t b a c k o n t r a c k t h is

gam e.

gam e

W e w a n t e d t o s h o w o n c e a g a in

p a s t w e e k e n d w it h t w o im p r e s

p r o v e d o n c e a g a in t h a t n o t m a n y

t h a t w e a re th e te a m t o b e a t in th e

s iv e

te a m s c a n p la y

C IA U .”

over

th e

C a r le to n

M a r tle ts

cam e

“ H o w e v e r,

a f t e r th e th is

w ith

us fo r 4 0

T h e M a r t le t s , w h o a re r a n k e d

m in u t e s . ”

R a v e n s a n d O tta w a G e e G ee s. The

M o o re

c o n f id e n c e b u i l d e r f o r th e te a m .

T h e M c G i l l M a r le ts b a s k e t

w in s

L is e n

s a id

o ff

T h e g a m e w a s a fa s t p a c e d ,

p h y s ic a l

J .o u g h r o a d t r i p w h i c h b r o k e t h e i r

a ff a ir

fro m

w h ic h

s e c o n d b e h in d W e s te r n , f e e l th a t t h is r a n k i n g d o e s n o t t r u l y r e f l e c t th e b a la n c e o f p o w e r i n th e C I A U

w in

O t t a w a i n i t i a l l y b e n e f it e d w i t h a n

s tr e a k b y th e to u g h , f o u r t h r a n k e d

e i g h t - p o i n t le a d w i t h e i g h t m i n

w om en’s

T o r o n to V a r s ity

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th e f i r s t h a lf . T h e

W e s t e r n p la y s i n a m u c h w e a k e r

h e a d e d in t o F r id a y n ig h t ’ s h o m e

M a r tle ts , h o w e v e r, s h o w e d th e ir

d i v i s i o n w i t h te a m s th e M a r t l e t s

gam e

m a tu r ity

h a v e b e a te n b y 2 5 p o in t s in t o u r

and

p o in t - g u a r d J e n S ta c e y le d th e

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im p r o v e t h e i r s ta tu s as th e n u m

t e a m ’ s la t e f i r s t - h a l f s u r g e t o ta k e

t o m o t i v a t e th e M a r t l e t s a s t h e y

b e r tw o

a s e v e n - p o in t le a d a t th e h a lf .

c o n tin u e

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season

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s lu m p in g

R a v e n s l o o k i n g to r e c o n f i r m te a m

th e C a n a d ia n

and

c o m p o s u re ,

“ T h is g a m e w a s g r e a t f o r u s

I n t e r u n i v e r s i t y A t h l e t i c s U n io n . R avens

J e n S ta c e y r e g a in e d s o m e c o n f i

gym

d e n c e ,”

S tin g e r s .

m e rc y

as th e y

8 4 -3 9 . T h is g a m e

s a id M o o r e . “ W e h a d

s h o w e d th e d e p th a n d c o m m it

g r e a t p r o d u c t io n

m ent

t o n ig h t w h ic h

te a m w o rk

th a t

th e

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as g ir ls

th u m p e d th e m

V ic k y

o f f th e b e n c h

was

e x t r e m e ly

le a g u e .

a lo n g th e r o a d to th e

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T h e M a r t l e t s d i d s o , s h o w in g th e

lik e

b a s k e t b a ll

t o n i g h t a t th e C u r r i e

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th e

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M a r t l e t s h a v e d e v e lo p e d t h is s e a

im p o r t a n t in th a t ty p e o f g a m e .

M o o r e . “ I t ’ s g o in g t o b e te n s e ,

s o n a n d e v e r y p l a y e r o n th e te a m

T h is is th e ty p e o f p r o d u c t io n w e

p h y s ic a l, a n d v e r y c o m p e t it iv e .

s c o re d

w i l l n e e d in th e p l a y o f f s . ”

B o t h te a m s h a v e th e a b il i t y

p o in t s .

in c lu d e d

te a m

H ig h

s c o re rs

c a p ta in

T h is r e m a r k w a s in d ic a tiv e

V ic k y

w i n t h is g a m e . T h e te a m w h i c h is

T e s s ie r w i t h 2 4 p o in t s a n d A n n e

o f th e n e v e r - g i v e - u p h u s t l e d i s

m e n t a l l y t o u g h , i g n o r e s th e d i s

G ild e n h u y s w h o c o n tr ib u t e d

p la y e d

M a rc h a n d ,

t r a c t io n s , a n d e x e c u te s t h e i r g a m e

C a r o lin e M a lo , a n d J e n n ife r d e

p la n w i l l w i n th e g a m e . I t ’ s g o in g

Leeuw ,

to b e e x c itin g .”

a n d p u lle d d o w n f i v e r e b o u n d s . I n a n e n t e r t a in in g d i s p la y o f

w ho

o f f e n c e , th e M a r t l e t s c o n t i n u e d

d o w n fro m

t h e ir w in n in g w a y s o n S a tu rd a y

c a l s ty le .

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m uch

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a p r e tty

re fu s e d

back

th e G e e G e e s ’ p h y s i

The

M a r tle ts

fo llo w

T u e s d a y n i g h t ’s g a m e w it h a n o t h

“ O t t a w a c a n s u r p r is e y o u i f

v ic to r y o v e r O tta w a

In g r id

e r to u g h c o n te s t a t h o m e a g a in s t

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s ix th - r a n k e d L a u r e n tia n

le d th e M a r t l e t s w i t h 2 7 p o in t s o n

F r i d a y n ig h t.

a t 6 p .m .

th e n i g h t a n d h a d s e v e r a l p r e t t y

good

J e n S ta c e y ta k e s f l i g h t i n M a r t le t v ic to r y .

Profile

Canada’s top shooter — McGill’s own Anne Gildenhuys By The M

inh

Luo n c

to w a r d s th e e n d o f th e s e a s o n ,

n a tio n ’ s to p

b a s k e t b a ll te a m s ,

b a ll fa n s ; t h e y ’ r e n o t th e k i n d

y o u ’ re 3 5 a n d d e c id e t o p la y , so

r e a lly

t h a t y e l l a t th e r e f s f r o m

got

d if f e r e n t

d r iv e

fo r

tr ib u te

In t e r u n iv e r s ity

w asn’t to

con

th a t m u c h

e x p la i n e d G i l d e n h u y s . “ I ’ d l i k e to c o n tin u e s c h o o l, b u t I m ig h t

in t e r e s t i n t h e m . ”

ta k e a b re a k f o r a y e a r o r tw o

S h e k e e p s h e r s e lf b u s y

M a r t l e t s th u s f a r , b u t o n e w h i c h

p la y in g

G ild e n h u y s c o u ld h e lp c h a n g e .

has

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little

th a t

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goal

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th e

d u r in g

can’t

s ta n d s . B u t th e y e n jo y w a t c h

b e fo r e . B u t as y o u

A t h l e t i c s U n i o n c h a m p io n s h ip —

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a re n ’ t

m o re

th e n ;

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p a re n ts

p l a y i n g t im e . I t w a s

e x p e c te d

th e

s a id . “ M y

you

f o r w a r d A n n e G ild e n h u y s is k e y C a n a d ia n

she

s u p e r - k n o w le d g e a b le b a s k e t

and A s a m e m b e r o f o n e o f th e

G u i l d e n h u y s ’ f a m i l y a ls o h a s

th e

o ff-s e a s o n

b e f o r e g o in g o n . ” F o r n o w , s h e r e lis h e s

th e

te a m s .

c h a n c e o f p la y in g o n s u c h a s u c

L a s t y e a r, she sp e n t h e r s u m

c e s s fu l te a m . S h e a p p r e c ia te s

m e r i n B . C . a n d p la y e d i n a

b e in g s u r r o u n d e d b y o u t s t a n d in g

m o s t s ta r

s p r in g

b a s k e t b a ll p la y e r s l i k e

a th le te s ,

s o m e U n iv e r s ity o f V ic t o r ia

A n d o n e g o a l r e m a in s : t o w i n th e

y e a r c a r e e r. A s la s t y e a r ’ s s e c o n d

G ild e n h u y s p la y e d

p l a y e r s . S h e a ls o p l a y e d i n

n a t io n a l t i t l e .

le a d in g

Q uebec

a v a r ie t y o f s p o rts

s e v e ra l to u r n a m e n ts d u r in g

B a s k e tb a ll L e a g u e ,

as a y o u n g s t e r . S h e

th e

s h e w a s n a m e d t o th e f i r s t a l l - s t a r

p la y e d v o l l e y b a l l in

o r g a n is e d ” ) , a n d p a r t i c i p a t e d

te a m

h ig h

The

2 2 - y e a r - o ld

p e rfo r m

s c o r e r in

U n iv e r s ity

th e

e v e ry

g a m e .”

O tta w a

L ik e

n a t iv e a lr e a d y h a s g a r n e r e d m a n y in d iv id u a l h o n o u r s in

m o re p re s s u re

h e r fo u r-

a f t e r b e in g n a m e d to th e

v a r s it y

s c h o o l,

and

s e c o n d te a m th e y e a r b e f o r e . H e r

d iv e d c o m p e titiv e ly

f i n e p l a y h a s c o n t in u e d t h is y e a r ,

fo r

a s s h e p r e s e n t ly le a d s th e n a t io n

B a s k e tb a ll

i n f i e l d - g o a l p e r c e n ta g e .

m o re

H e r r o le o n th e M a r t l e t s h a s

fe w o f

i n g i n th e b a c k y a r d

o r g a n is e d

b a s k e t b a ll

s tu d e n t,

e n ts s in c e a r r i v i n g a t M c G i l l .

t o e n t e r e n g in e e r in g . “ I ’m

in t e r e s t e d in

b io

b e f o r e c o m in g t o M c G i l l b e c a u s e

te n .

b ro th e rs

m e c h a n ic s p r e s e n t ly ; I c o u ld

th e h ig h s c h o o l s h e a tt e n d e d d i d

p la y e d b a s k e t b a ll,

se e m y s e l f d o in g s o m e k i n d

n o t h a v e a te a m .

so I ’ d jo in

“ A s a r o o k ie , I d id n ’ t r e a lly

M y

w ith

G i l d e n h u y s : o f f e n s i v e i n t e n s i t y p a y s o ff.

Tanim A h m ed

c o n n e c tio n s

e n jo y e d t r a v e l l i n g w i t h th e te a m ,

e d ,”

f a t h e r ta u g h t h e r e , a n d h e r b r o t h

b e in g w i t h th e p la y e r s , a n d p r a c

d i d n ’ t t h i n k I ’ d m a k e th e b a s k e t

tis e s w e r e f u n . ” s a id G i ld e n h u y s .

b a l l te a m . I a c t u a l l y p la n n e d o n

“ T h e n V ic k y

p l a y i n g v o l l e y b a l l w h e n I g o t to

in v o lv e d

M c G ill.”

c o m e o u t t o s o m e o f th e g a m e s ,”

w hat

was

g o in g

on.

[T e s s ie r ] g o t h u r t

s a id G i l d e n h u y s . “ I r e a l l y

g ra d u a te

re s e a rc h

th e m . M o s tly , th e y w e r e th e o n e s w h o g o t m e s t a r t

know

o f

w ith

M c G ill; h e r

“ M y f a m i l y h a s a lw a y s b e e n in

m y

s p o rts .

w o rk th a t

a re a .

They

I n a d d i t i o n t o p o s s ib le g r a d s e t h e r s ig h t s o n p l a y i n g p r o f e s s io n a l b a s k e t b a ll i n E u r o p e in th e x t f e w y e a rs .

W o m e n 's B a s k e tb a ll vs p .m a n d v s L a u re n tia n , F r id a y , Fe b . 14 at 6 p .m . M e n 's B asketb all v s C o n c o rd ia T u e sd a y, Feb. 11 at 8 p .m . a n d vs Laurentian Frid ay, Feb . 14 at 8 p .m .

h a v e n ’ t r e a l l y d e c id e d y e t . ” u a te s tu d ie s , G ild e n h u y s h a s a ls o

e r a tt e n d e d th e u n iv e r s i t y .

Fe b . 1 4 at 7 p .m a n d v s U o fT S a tu rd a y , Fe b . 15 a t 7 p .m .

C o n c o r d ia T u e s d a y , Fe b . 11 at 6

a n d m a t h le d t o h e r d e c is io n

w h e n I w a s a ro u n d

Coming up this week

h a s c o m b in e d

H e r a b i l i t i e s i n p h y s ic s

G ild e n h u y s h a d n o p r io r e x p e r i in

e n g in e e r in g

a c tiv ity

a tio n a l

“ I s ta r te d p l a y

ence

cal

Continued on Page 24

M e n 's H o c k e y v s G u e lp h F rid a y ,

f o u r t h - y e a r m e c h a n i

h e r a t h l e t i c a n d a c a d e m ic t a l

b e lie v e ,

a c t iv it ie s s u c h as s o c c e r A

h e r s e lf.

to o

G ild e n h u y s

M c G ill.

h a rd

w ith

a re c re

y e a r . T h o u g h o p p o s in g g u a rd s it

a lo n g

a n d h ik in g .

w as

u n t il s h e a r r iv e d a t

fin d

le a g u e

s u m m e r ( “ n o th in g

y e a rs .

g r e a t ly c h a n g e d s in c e h e r f i r s t

m ay

o n v a r io u s

W o m e n 's H o c k e y v s N o rth C o m m u n it y C o lle g e T u e s d a y , Feb . 11 at 4 p .m . B a d m in t o n Q S S F fin a ls Sat, Fe b .

15 a n d S u n , F e b 1 6 ,1 1 a .m .

Page 24 S p O f t S

February 11th, 1997

Redmen volleyball close out regular season S tro n g f in is h f o r th e p e r e n n ia l u n d e r d o g s

By Paul Futhey

o u t th e

m a tc h . T h e

Redm en,

a lt h o u g h g o in g t h r o u g h a w in le s s S u n d a y a fte rn o o n

saw

season

th e

C IA U B A S K E TB A LL R A N K IN G S - W O M E N

M E N 'S B A S K ETB A LL S T A N D IN G S

(As o f February 3 rd)

Q UEBEC

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.

W estern (1) (O W IA A )

C o n co rd ia

M c G ill (2 )

(Q SSF)

M c G ill

Regina (3 )

(G P A Q

Laval

Bishop's

9 15

15 15

6 5

4 3

11 12

le y b a ll

1223 1083 18 1163 1245 10 9 9 4 1169 8 952 1169 6

C a r a b in s

M E N 'S H O C K E Y

Laurentian (S X O W IA A )

O N T A R IO

Y o rk (7)

(O W IA A )

8 . Victo ria (9 ) (C W U A A ) 9 . W in n ip e g (NR) ( G P A Q 10 . Alberta (8 ) (C W U A A )

W h ile

S C O R IN G (Top 10 )

GP FG 3FG FT P A vg 13 117 1 98 335 25.8 Terri Jobannesson, M a n 6 65 1 13 146 24.3 Theresa M a cC u ish , SFX 10 90 6 44 242 24.2 Karen Jackson, Y o r 12 97 0 86 2 8 0 23.3 Lisa Koop, V ic 14 107 16 63 325 23.2 N atalie M c V ic a r ,W p g 9 51 11 65 200 22.2 C a ro ly n W ares, D a l 12 94 2 67 261 21.8 Trena Mott, Reg 9 52 12 52 192 21.3 M a jo rie Kelly, M a n 9 81 0 18 180 20.0 Jadranka Cm o g o rac, StM 11 48 26 44 218 19.8 V ic k y Tessier, M c G

140 85 60.7 Lynn Robertson, A c a 186 112 60.2 C o rrin W ersta, Reg 79 47 59.5 N atalie M c V ic a r, W p g 87 51 58.6 G e n e v ie v e Laporte, Lav 77 45 58.4 K im b erly N e w m an , U N B 6 8 39 57.4 V ic k y Tessier, M c G 205 117 57.1 Jennifer Yungblut, Bro 62 35 56.4 Tan n e ke Blaauboer, W e s 39 22 56.4 57 Brenda V rk lja n , Lau 32 56.1 A n n e G ild e n h u ys, M c G

m a d e ,”

s a id

B o u c h a rd .

n ic e

n o s u r

ta k e

a set fro m

th e s e

guys, but we

l y , i t w a s d i s a p p o i n t i n g f o r th e

s tr e n g th a n d I t h i n k t h a t h u r t u s .”

s e t. T h e

R e d m e n , p la g u e d

B o u c h a rd

w e re n ’ t at fu ll w a s r e f e r r in g

p o w e r h itte r s A n d y L in le y , w h o

i n c o n s i s t e n t s e r v in g a n d c l e v e r

m is s e d th e m a tc h f o r p e r s o n a l re a s o n s , a n d M a z ia r D iv a n g a h i

1 5 - 2 , 1 5 -9 , 1 5 -5 in a s h o r t m a tc h

w h o p la y e d , a lth o u g h

th a t to o k s lig h t ly

b e e n s i c k th e w e e k le a d in g u p to

m o re th a n an

he had

th e m a tc h .

h o u r t o p la y . on o u r

B o u c h a r d is o p t i m i s t i c a b o u t

C IA U H O C K E Y S T A T S

s e lv e s e a r l y , ” e x p la in e d c o a c h

th e t e a m ’ s c h a n c e s n e x t y e a r b u t

through February 2 nd

N o rm a n d

S C O R IN G (Top 11 ) G P

Christian Skoryna, A c a 22

2 0 39 59 19 32 51 2 0 29 49 19 29 48 21 27 48 22 24 46 20 26 46 13 32 45 18 2 6 44 20 24 44 15 27 42

22 D a n C e m a n ,W in 20 JF G régoire, M e n 23 Brandon Boyko, W in 20 Jason W eaver, A c a 22 To d d Zavitz, Bro 20 D a v e G ilm o re , StT 23 G ra d y M anson, Bdn 24 K e lly N obes, M c G 21

“ W e

k n o w s s o m e m o r e g r o w i n g p a in s

w e r e n ’ t p l a c i n g th e b a ll h ig h a n d

a re i n o r d e r b e f o r e th e te a m w i l l

d e e p o n o u r s e rv e s lik e I w a n te d .

b e c o m e a fo r c e o n th e Q u e b e c

W h e n w e d i d , l i k e i n th e s e c o n d

v o lle y b a ll c ir c u it.

B o u c h a rd .

“ W e o b v io u s ly

s e t, w e w e r e g i v i n g t h e i r p a s s e rs

w hen

tr o u b le .”

th e

season

knew s ta rte d

th a t we

w o u l d n ’ t b e c o m p e t i n g f o r th e

I n d e e d , th e b r i g h t s p o t w a s th e s e c o n d s e t as th e R e d m e n ,

c h a m p io n s h ip ,”

w h o lo o k e d le th a r g ic u p to th a t

“ W e ’ re o n ly lo s in g [ A le k s a n d e r

p o in t , r e s p o n d e d w i t h s ix s t r a ig h t

N e c a k o v a n d W a y n e C a s s id y ],

p o in t s t o t u r n a n 8 - 3 d e f i c i t i n t o a

a n d w e h a v e a c o u p le o f g o o d

9 - 8 le a d . A l t h o u g h th e le a d w a s

r o o k ie s c o m in g

s h o r t - l i v e d , a q u i c k g la n c e o v e r

I t ’ l l b e a y o u n g te a m , b u t w e ’ re

a t th e U

a lw a y s i m p r o v i n g . ”

de M

bench

saw

th e

he o b s e rv e d .

h e re n e x t y e a r.

C a r a b in s ’ c o a c h c le a r ly v o ic in g

A t t h e r a te th e R e d m e n a re

C IA U S W IM M IN G R A N K IN G S

h is d is p le a s u r e a b o u t th e M c G i l l

g o in g r i g h t n o w , s u c c e s s m i g h t

(As o f February 3 rd)

com eback.

even com e

T h e th ir d

W O M EN

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8.

(C W U A A )

U B C ( 2)

(C W U A A )

Toronto (4 ) Laval (5 )

Gildenhuys continued Continued from Page 23 “ I t ’ s b e e n g re a t p la y in g w ith s o m a n y g r e a t p la y e r s s u c h as V ic k y

T e s s ie r , J e n S ta c e y , a n d S te v e n s o n ,”

s a id

(O U A A ) (O U A A )

f o r u s s in c e w e ’ l l b e lo s i n g a l o t o f p la y e r s a f t e r th e s e a s o n . O u r goal

d e fin ite ly

w in

th e

n a t io n a l c h a m p io n s h ip . ”

(QSSF)

G ild e n h u y s w i l l r e tu r n n e x t

U niversity N e w Brun sw ick (8 )(AUAA)

y e a r in

M c G ill (6 )

(Q SSF)

e n g in e e r in g

(QSSF)

th e r e w i l l b e s o m e f a m i l i a r fa c e s

(O U A A )

m is s in g n e x t y e a r o n th e b a s k e t

M ontreal (7 )

9 . Alberta (9 ) 10 . Victoria(N R)

q u ic k e r th a n th e y

e x p e c t.

G i l d e n h u y s . “ T h i s is a b i g y e a r

C a lg a ry (1) M cM aster (2 )

s e t to o k o n ly

m in u te s as th e C a r a b in s c lo s e d

(C W U A A ) 1 . C a lg a ry (2 ) 2 . M cM aster (1 ) (O U A A ) (Q SSF) 2 . M c G ill( 3 ) (O U A A ) 4 . Toronto( 4 ) (QSSF) 5 . Laval (5 ) (C W U A A ) 6 . U B C (8 ) (C W U A A ) 7 . Alberta( 6 ) (C W U A A ) 8 . V ictoria (7 ) 9 . University o f N e w Brun sw ick (9 H AU AA) 10 . D a lh ousie( 10 ) (A U A A ) M E N 'S

Reb

have

th e

“ O b v io u s ly , i t w o u ld h a v e b e e n , i t w a s r e a lly

L e s le y

7 30 92 13.1 62 56 85 141 11 . C a ro ly n W ares, D a l 12 Stella Ighorewo, Ott 10 69 36 105 10.5 Lara A sp lin, W p g 9 27 66 93 10.3 11 55 57 112 10.2 Susan Parke, D a l Leighann D o a n , C a l 14 57 72 129 9.2 Erin M cAlister, C a l 14 45 76 121 8.6 Jacalyn W h ite, W a t 52 25 77 8.6 9 Karen Jackson, Y o r 12 61 100 8.3 39 108 8.3 63 V ic k y Tessier, M c G 13 45 G e o rg ia Risnita, W in

Pet

b a l l p la c e m e n t b y U d e M , f e l l

Pierre G e n d ro n , M c G

( as o f Feb. 3 )

R E B O U N D S (Top 10 )

a v is it

22 17 3 2 128 55 36 M c G ill 22 11 9 2 108 81 24 C o n co rd ia 22 10 10 2 95 109 22 O ttaw a 22 10 11 1 78 87 21

G re g C la n c y , A c a

F IE L D -G O A L P E R C E N T A G E (Top 10 )

“ I ’ m r e a l l y p le a s e d w i t h th e p r o g r e s s a n u m b e r o f o u r p la y e r s

FA R EA ST

M c G ill

C IA U W O M E N B A S K E TB A LL S T A T S

m ade

e ig h th

th e

“ W e p u t p re s s u re

14 1 1172 811 28 15 Co n co rd ia 15 11 4 999 889 22 Laval 15 7 8 911 945 14 Bishop's 15 3 12 810 1044 6

p la y ,

de M o n tré a l

R e d m e n t o h a v e n o t e v e n ta k e n a

UQ TR

p a id

le a g u e

p r is e t h a t th e C a r a b in s w o n e a s i

{W O M E N 'S B A SK ETB A LL S T A N D IN G S QUEBEC

C u r r ie g y m .

Toronto (6 ) (O W IA A ) M anitoba (4 ) (G P A C )

season

ra n k e d U n iv e r s ité

tr e m e n d o u s s tr id e s .

c o m p l e t i o n o f th e R e d m e n ’ s v o l

(C W U A A )

o r d e r to c o m p le te th e s is . S o

her

w h ile

b a ll c o u r t , fa n s w i l l b e a b le t o see A n n e G ild e n h u y s

in a c tio n f o r

o n e m o r e s e a s o n . A n d m a y b e as p a rt

o f th e

c h a m p io n s .

d e f e n d in g

C IA U

Æ A n n e G ild e n h u y s

3 4 6 1 P A R K A lfE . - 8 4 4 . 3 3 1 3

Gary Rush

S p o r t s Page 25

February 11th, 1997

Hockey Martlets taste victory in last game of their season s tro n g e r

By Ben O'H ara

p ro g ra m s

C o n c o r d ia ’ s.

e q u a lly

W in te r

f r ig id

A re n a ,

a g a in s t t h e m , t h e y p l a y h a r d —

M c C o n n e ll th e

as th e

M a r tle ts h a v e th e c a rd s s ta c k e d

O n a c h i l l y S a tu r d a y n i g h t in an

such

A lth o u g h

g a m e i n a n d g a m e o u t.

M c G ill

M a r t l e t s h o c k e y te a m e n d e d t h e i r

T h e M a r t l e t s f i n i s h th e r e g u

1 9 9 6 -1 9 9 7 r e g u la r s e a s o n o n a

la r s e a s o n a m u c h im p r o v e d 2 -

p o s it iv e n o te ; th e M a r t l e t s p i c k e d

10.

u p t h e i r s e c o n d w i n o f th e s e a s o n

a re g r e a t r e s u lts f r o m a te a m th a t

o v e r th e

“ d i d n ’ t s e t it s [ t e a m ’ s ] g o a ls o n

CEG EP

P a tr io te s

S t.

L a u re n t

w in s a n d lo s s e s b u t o n i m p r o v i n g

3 -1 .

t h e i r g o a ls f o r a n d a g a in s t.”

T h e v i s i t o r s o p e n e d th e s c o r in g

m id w a y

p e r io d

fir s t

T h o s e e x p e c t a t io n s w e r e a ls o

fo rw a rd

m e t a s t h e y r e d u c e d t h e i r g o a ls

M c G ill’ s

a g a in s t b y 4 0 p e r c e n t o v e r la s t

th ro u g h

th e

a goal by

M e la n ie

B o ite a u .

H a rm o n y

C h u rc h

evened

season.

th e

T h e fa t e o f w o m e n ’ s h o c k e y

s c o r e o n e m in u t e i n t o th e s e c o n d —

A c c o r d i n g t o M a d d e n , th e s e

p e r io d

w h ic h

saw

i s e x p e c te d t o c h a n g e n e x t s e a s o n

th e

M a r t l e t s d o m in a t e th e p la y . T h e i r

w hen

t e n a c i t y p a id o f f w h e n d e f e n c e -

C a n a d ia n

m a n C la ir e S h a rp e g a v e M c G ill

A th le tic s

th e le a d o n a b e a u t i f u l e n d - t o - e n d

n a t io n a l c h a m p io n s h ip . T h e e l i g i

r u s h in th e p e r i o d ’ s f i n a l m in u t e .

b i l i t y a n d te a m r u le s h a v e y e t to

o f

th e

th ir d

p e r io d

but

U n io n

s p o rt w ith

a d d re s s s y s te m

h a rd w e h a d th e o p p o r t u n it y to

n ic e t o see a l l th e h a r d w o r k p a y

th e s tr e n g th s o f c u r r e n t p la y e r s as

o f f i n th e w i n c o l u m n . ”

w e l l as d il i g e n c e i n s c o u t in g f o r

c o m e o u t w i t h t w o p o in t s , ” s a id

th e C h a m p i o n s ’ a s t h e M a r t l e t s

M a r tle ts h e a d c o a c h D a n M a d d e n

te a m ’ s s e c o n d c o n s e c u tiv e w in

c e l e b r a t e d t h e i r s e c o n d le a g u e

a f t e r th e g a m e .

o v e r th e P a t r io t e s w i t h a n e m p t y

v i c t o r y i n th r e e w e e k s a f t e r l o s

n e t g o a l i n th e g a m e ’ s d y i n g s e c

in g

onds.

b a c k to 1 9 9 2 .

F o r tin .

s e c u re d

o f f ic ia l

C o a c h M a d d e n , p o in t in g to T h e p u b lic

b la r e d o u t a s t a t i c - f i l l e d ‘ W e A r e

o f L u c ie

H e w in g

In t e r u n iv e r s ity

a d e c is io n is e x p e c te d s o o n .

w as

th e

M egan

A aron Chase

T h e i m p r o v e d M a r t l e t d e f e n s i v e e ffo r t w a s e v i d e n t i n t h e i r 3 - 1 v i c t o r y o n S a t u r d a y .

d e n ie d th e e q u a lis e r b y th e s o l i d g o a lte n d in g

becom es

b e d e t e r m in e d f o r th e le a g u e , b u t

S t. L a u r e n t b u z z e d a r o u n d th e M c G i l l z o n e f o r th e m a j o r i t y

s tr a ig h t g a m e s , d a tin g

“ W e

knew

w o rk e d

M c G i l l d is p la y e d a m e a s u r e o f c o n fid e n c e w h ic h

h a s r a r e ly

M a k e n o m is t a k e —

b e in g a

new

b lo o d , is

c o n fid e n t n e x t

M c G i l l M a r t l e t is h a r d w o r k . I t is

y e a r ’ s te a m w i l l b e a b le t o b u i l d

a te a m t h a t r e c e iv e s n o f u n d i n g

o n t h is y e a r ’ s s u c c e s s e s .

—

o th e r th a n ic e t im e — a n d o fte n

fro m

b e e n s e e n o v e r th e p a s t t w o s e a

th e u n iv e r s it y

s o n s , a n d M a d d e n a d d e d , “ i t is

te a m s t h a t a re b e t t e r f u n d e d w i t h

fa c e s

From th e B le ach ers

What’s love got to do with it? Cross-border NHL growth By M anny A lmela

A n o t h e r i m p o r t a n t s id e e f f e c t

a tr u e c h a lle n g e .

im p o r ta n t

C a n a d ia n s

e x p a n d as p la n n e d . I ’ m c o n v in c e d t h a t th e g e n e r a l c o n s e n s u s o f

o f th e U S A h o c k e y e x p lo s i o n is

T h e W o r l d C u p lo s s m a y le a d

b e ca u se o f w h a t h a p p e n e d to B e n

it s im p a c t o n i n t e r n a t io n a l h o c k e y .

t o a n im p r o v e m e n t o f o u r m i n o r

J o h n s o n . H a d B e n n o t o p te d to

C a n a d i a n h o c k e y f a n s is t h a t a

th e b lu e c o m e t th a t t r a ils f r o m th e

A s a l l C a n a d ia n s p a i n f u l l y

saw

le a g u e p r o g r a m s t o e n s u re th a t w e

s tr a y f r o m

h is u s u a l r e g im e n t o f

le a g u e w i t h o u t n a m e s l i k e C h r is

F o x T r a x p u c k s h o w s C a n a d ia n

t h is p a s t s u m m e r , th e d a y s o f te a m

k e e p p a c e w i t h th e n o w - m i g h t y

F lin t s t o n e s v it a m in s a n d a c a n o f

K o n to s , B ry a n F o g a r ty a n d D a n

A m e r ic a n s .

B o o s t, w e as a c o u n t r y w o u l d n o t

Q u in n is a b e tte r le a g u e ; w i t h f u r

H o c k e y is o n th e m o v e a n d

h o c k e y fa n s e x a c tly

w h e r e th e

U S A b e in g a n o n - f a c t o r a re f o r e v

The

er gone.

s p o r t is h e a d e d — s o u th .

‘ 9 8 O ly m p ic s w i l l fe a

have

fe lt

w hat

d id

a fte r

t h e r e x p a n s io n , t h i s is th e h a r s h r e a l i t y t h a t th e N H L fa c e s .

tu r e th e m o s t im p o r t a n t h o c k e y

D o n o v a n ’ s tr iu m p h . C a n a d a ’ s

b e s t f o r so lo n g th a t m a n y o f u s

s in c e 1 9 7 2 . T h e h e a v ily a n t ic ip a t

r e t u r n t o h o c k e y g l o r y c a n b e se e n

h o w d e t r im e n t a l i t is t o th e w e l l

b e g a n t o ta k e o u r d o m in a n c e f o r

e d C a n a d a - U .S . r e m a tc h h a s h o c k

in m u c h th e s a m e w a y .

b e in g o f t h e l e a g u e . C a n a d ia n s

g r a n te d . O n e c o u ld e v e n s a y t h a t

e y fa n s t h r o u g h o u t th e c o u n t r y

T h e o n ly r e a l d r a w b a c k t o th e

C a n a d ia n s t o d e t e r m in e w h e t h e r

o f t e n s p e a k o f t h e i r “ lo v e f o r th e

p e r h a p s C a n a d ia n

had

f r o t h i n g a t th e m o u th . I see t h is as

U .S , e x p a n s io n is th e d i l u t i o n o f

w e a re a c t u a lly l o o k i n g o u t f o r th e

g a m e ” a n d p r o u d ly p r o c la im

th a t

p e a k e d . A l o n g w i t h th e s t u n n in g

a p o s it iv e e v e n t, a n d i t a l l s te m s

ta le n t

it.

in t e g r it y o f th e g a m e o r s im p ly

h o c k e y is a n in t e g r a l p a r t o f o u r

lo s s t o te a m U S A c a m e a r e n e w e d

b a c k t o h o c k e y ’ s e x p a n s io n to th e

U n f o r t u n a t e l y , w i t h th e d e c re a s e

b e in g s e lf is h . T h i s c a n o n ly h a p

n a t io n ’ s s o c ia l f a b r ic .

h u n g e r a n d e m p a s s io n e d d e s ir e t o

U n it e d S ta te s .

o f ta le n te d p la y e r s c o m e s th e e n d

p e n o n c e C a n a d ia n s s to p p l a y i n g

le s s c lu t c h in g a n d g r a b b in g w h ic h

th e r o le o f o v e r p r o t e c t iv e p a re n ts

is c o m m o n p la c e in t o d a y ’ s N H L .

w h o w o n ’ t a llo w

th e

C a n a d a w a s th e u n d is p u te d

‘ A m e r ic a n is a t io n ’ o f th e N H L a n d

T h e re

ta lk

o f

H o w s o m e fa n s c a n d e n o u n c e

hockey

r e c la im o u r th r o n e as th e w o r l d ’ s

A s d i f f i c u l t as lo s in g m a y b e ,

a c c o m p a n y in g

h o c k e y le a d e r. T o b e th e b e s t, o n e

i t m a k e s o n e a p p r e c ia t e w h a t i t

in th e U n it e d S ta te s a n d s t i l l v o w

m u s t a lw a y s w a n t t o fa c e th e b e s t.

m e a n s to w in . D o n o v a n B a ile y ’ s

T h is c o u ld b e c o m e a s e r io u s

t o lo v e th e g a m e s i m p l y m a k e s n o

N o t h in g b r in g s o u t g r e a tn e s s l i k e

a c c o m p lis h m e n t t h is s u m m e r w a s

p r o b le m i f th e le a g u e c o n tin u e s to

th e e x p lo s io n w h i c h h a s o c c u r r e d

It’s

tim e

s e a r c h in g

fo r

som e

th e

p a rt

s o u lo f

th e ir c h ild

a ll

c ro s s th e s tre e t o r , in t h is c a s e , th e b o rd e r.

se n se . A lo v e f o r s o m e th in g i m p lie s w a n t in g

see

g ro w

and

b e c o m e th e b e s t th a t i t c a n b e . I f

Badminton: birdies flying in the right direction

th e g a m e o f h o c k e y is as w o n d e r f u l as w e a l l m a k e i t o u t to b e , w e

By Sarah W

inn

s h o u ld w a n t o th e r s ( e v e n i f th e y M c G i l l ’ s th ir d - r a n k e d b a d

a r e A m e r i c a n s ) t o d i s c o v e r th e g a m e a n d s h a re o u r p a s s io n . T h e r e is n o d e n y in g t h a t th e

m in to n

h o s tin g

th e

W i t h th e g a m e o f b a d m in t o n b e in g

“ as o ld

t e a m ’ s s ta n d in g . W i t h i n th e te a m c o m p e t it io n , e a c h a th le te

U n iv e r s ité

S h e rb ro o k e ,

as y o u r a n d m y

L a v a l,

M o n tré a l

and

w e l l , w h i l e th e te a m is s t i l l t r y i n g c o m b in a t io n s f o r th e p e r f e c t p a ir

S e p t e m b e r - t o - M a r c h s e a s o n , th e

w h e n M c C a r th y b e c a m e c o m m is

i n m i x e d d o u b le s .

1 6 p la y e r s o n th e M c G i l l te a m

s io n e r o f th e le a g u e , i n a n e f f o r t

p a r tic ip a te

th re e p r o v in c ia l

re w a rd

a g e s c o m b in e d , ”

th e te a m r e c e iv e d it s d u e r e c o g

s e a t to u rn a m e n ts .

a b o u t th e ‘ g o o d o l d d a y s ’ o f th e

n i t i o n a c c o r d in g t o M c G i l l c o a c h

p l a y i n g a r o u n d r o b i n s t y le t o u r

F ra n k M c C a rth y .

n a m e n t , t h e p a r t i c i p a t i n g te a m s

e ith e r th e

U n iv e r s ité

L a v a l,

N H L g r e a ts h a v e p a s s e d o n w i t h o u t s e e in g a d im e f r o m t h e i r p e n

M ç G i l l h a v e a l l e a r n e d s p o ts i n

s io n s .

th e

f in a ls .

M o n tré a l

A lth o u g h

and de

B o t h th e m e n ’ s a n d w o m e n ’ s s in g le s te a m s h a v e b e e n p l a y i n g

T h e in d iv id u a l c o m p e titio n

T h ro u g h o u t

e n jo y r e m in is c in g

U n iv e r s ité

to u rn a m e n t.

w a s im p le m e n t e d th r e e y e a r s a g o

d u Q u é b e c à T r o is -

e n th u s ia s t s

N H L , b u t th a t d o e s n o t c h a n g e th e

a ls o

c o m p e te s f o r i n d i v i d u a l r a n k in g .

c r e d i b i l i t y t o th e le a g u e . H o c k e y

r e a l i t y t h a t a n a la r m in g n u m b e r o f

i t is a b o u t t im e

th e

U n iv e r s ité R iv iè r e s .

p r o v i n c i a l f i n a ls t h is w e e k e n d .

N H L c o m m is s io n e r G a r y B e ttm a n e ra h a s re s to re d m u c h -n e e d e d

te a m

le a g u e t h a t c o n s is t s o f f o u r o t h e r te a m s :

In s te a d

o f

in d i v i d u a l a c h ie v e

C h a n g e s i n th e t e a m ’ s p r a c tic e s h a v e b e e n m a d e d u r i n g th e p a s t fe w

m e n t.

w e e k s in

a n e f f o r t to

s h a k e t h i r d p la c e —

t h a t is s t a r t in g t o b e c o m e a l i t t l e

g e t r a n k e d . T h e t o p t h r e e te a m s

m i x e d d o u b le s e v e n ts . W h i l e th e

to o fa m ilia r . D if f e r e n t d r ills h a v e

th e n a d v a n c e to th e p r o v in c ia l

m e n ’ s d o u b le s te a m o f B e n j a m i n

b e e n u s e d t o e m p h a s is e th e te a m

f i n a ls f o r s u d d e n d e a th p l a y o f f s .

C h in a n d F e n d y T ja n h a s b e e n

w o rk

u n b e a te n i n Q u e b e c t h is y e a r , th e

D u r i n g o n e v e r y in te n s e p r a c t ic e , th e te a m s e e m e d o p t i m i s t i c .

The

tw o

f in a lis t s

fro m

P la y e r s

can

c o m p e te

s in g le s , d o u b le s

n e c e s s a ry

a p o s it io n

d o u b le s .

T h is n e w le a g u e im a g e , c r e d

ra n k s a h e a d o f M c G ill, M c C a r th y

Q u e b e c w i l l a ls o p a r t i c i p a t e i n a

w o m e n ’ s d o u b le s te a m h a s b e e n

it e d to e x p a n s io n , a llo w s th e N H L

b e li e v e s t h a t t h e t w o te a m s a r e

f i n a l t o u r n a m e n t a g a in s t th e t o p

c o n s is t e n t ly

b e h in d

S a id te a m c a p t a in S te p h a n ie

t o c lo s e th e b o o k o n th e p a s t a n d

e v e n ly m a tc h e d . T h e y w i l l p la y

t w o O n t a r i o te a m s . T h is Q u e b e c -

M o n t r e a l a n d L a v a l b u t a re l o o k

L e m ie u x , “ w e ’ v e b e e n p la y in g

s h e d i t s im a g e a s a s e c o n d - r a t e

e a c h o t h e r o n th e f i r s t d a y o f th e

O n t a r io C u p to u r n a m e n t w i l l b e

in g to im p r o v e .

g o o d so fa r , so w h a te v e r c h a n g e s

le a g u e . T h e g a m e h a s b e e n a b le t o

to u r n a m e n t a n d th e w in n e r w i l l

h o s te d b y L ’ U n i v e r s i t é d e L a v a l

s h i f t fo c u s t o th e m a r k e t in g o f its

g o o n to p l a y f i r s t r a n k e d L a v a l

t h is M a r c h .

y o u n g s u p e rs ta rs a n d h a s a tt r a c te d

on S unday.

m a n y y o u n g fa n s in th e p ro c e s s .

M c G i l l p la y s i n a p r o v i n c i a l

T h e c o m b in e d p e r fo r m a n c e o f e a c h p la y e r d e t e r m in e s th e

th ir d

“ W e ’ v e b e e n s o c lo s e b e h in d M o n tr e a l,” M e rry n

s a id d o u b le s p la y e r

R o b e rts , r e fe r r in g

M o n t r é a l ’ s 3 - 2 v i c t o r y i n th e la s t

w e ’ v e m a d e c a n o n ly b e tte r.”

m a ke us

7 Page 26 S p O ï t S

February 11th, 1997

P ie r r e

o f

G e n d ro n

M e g a n

m e n ’s h o c k e y

s y n c h r o n is e d

F o x s w im m in g

Redmen split series with the Feds By D avid M

izener

p o in ts , b u t i t w a s s im p ly n o t to be. T h e R e d m e n f i n i s h e d th e g a m e

G e n d ro n

le d

th e te a m

G e n d ro n

v ic t o r y

o n e g o a l

S a t u r d a y ’s 4 -1

a n d t w o a s s is t s in R e d m e n

w it h

F o x

t h e s e n io r W o m e n ’s

In t e r u n iv e r s it y A t h le t ic s

p o s t e d h is 2 0 0 th c a r e e r

a c c o m p lis h

f ir s t in

f ig u r e s o f t h e O n t a r io

o v e r Q u e e n ’s.

p o in t , t h e s e v e n t h R e d m a n

f in is h e d

A s s o c ia t io n

c h a m p io n s h ip s a t

M c M a s t e r U n iv e r s it y

la s t

B a s k e t b a ll te a m s f r o m

w eeken d .

w ith

a 7 3 -5 7

v ic to r y

R a v e n s , a v e n g in g

P r o v in c e , a n d m a n a g e d to ta k e o n e

e m b a r r a s s m e n t. O t h e r n o ta b le s in

th e

a t th e

th e R e d m e n ’ s v i c t o r y in c lu d e d J o e l

C u r r ie g y m

d u r in g c o n te s ts o n

P e a r lm a n , w h o a d d e d 1 5 , P a t I n g lis

F r id a y

Redm en

w ith 8 a n d M a rk

and

S a tu rd a y .

h a d th e R e d m e n s q u a r in g

R a w a s a n d P e te r

In the second half, McGill raised its gam e that extra notch. The team was led by the hot hand of Rick Varisco.

n ig h t m a tc h -u p o ff

a g a in s t th e 4 - 8 C a r le t o n R a v e n s

F r a s e r b o th w i t h 6 p o in ts . W it h a s o lid 1 6 - p o in t v ic t o r y u n d e r t h e i r b e lt , th e R e d m e n c le a r l y h a d m o m e n tu m

in a r e m a tc h o f a N o ve m b e r gam e

B riefs

w h ic h

th e

h e a d in g

s e c o n d c o n s e c u tiv e s ilv e r m e d a l a t th e O n t a r io W o m e n ’ s In t e r u n iv e r s it y A t h le t ic A s s o c ia tio n ’ s c h a m p io n s h ip th is w e e k e n d in B u r lin g t o n , O n ta rio . T h e te a m f e l l to d e fe n d in g c h a m p io n Q u e e n ’ s in th e f in a ls , a fte r s w e e p in g M c M a s te r in th e s e m is .

S a tu rd a y ’ s g a m e

R a v e n s p u n is h e d th e R e d m e n 8 4 -

a g a in s t

R e d m e n o p e n e d u p a s ix - p o in t le a d

b a c k tim e .

p r o v i d e d b y th e p l a y o f s t a r t e r s

In th e f i r s t h a lf , w i t h e ig h t

O tta w a .

I n it ia lly ,

M a r k R a w a s a n d D a v is . T h e t r e n d d i d n o t la s t. A f t e r p o o r e a r ly s h o o tin g , th e G e e G e e s

w it h a b r e a k -a w a y g o a l 31 s e c o n d s in t o th e p e r io d . I t

o ff e n c e a n d th e g a m e w a s t ie d a t

w e re a b le t o n a r r o w M c G i l l ’ s le a d

w a s h is 3 2 n d g o a l o f th e s e a s o n , a n d e x te n d e d h is

n in e p o in ts .

t o t w o p o in t s w i t h

p o in t- s c o r in g s tre a k to 16 g a m e s .

j m u s te re d

m uch

th e

way

1 3 :4 5 r e m a in

O f f e n c e w a s l i m i t e d o n b o th

in g . A f t e r a q u e s tio n a b le te c h n ic a l

D a v id G r e n ie r w r a p p e d u p th e s c o r in g w i t h h is

e n d s o f th e f l o o r d u e to n u m e ro u s

f o u l w a s c a lle d o n D a v is f o r h a n g

s ix th g o a l, o n ly th re e m in u te s la te r. M a r t in R o u t h ie r

tu r n o v e rs . C a r le to n w a s ra v a g e d b y

in g o n th e r i m , a n d a n in t e n t io n a l

h a d th r e e a s s is ts in th e v i c t o r y , w h ile G e n d r o n f i n

tu r n o v e r s t h r o u g h o u t th e e n tir e

f o u l c a lle d o n R a w a s s e c o n d s la te r,

is h e d w i t h o n e g o a l a n d t w o a ssists.

c o n te s t, a n d f in is h e d w it h a w h o p

th e G e e G e e s r e c e iv e d f o u r f r e e b ie s f r o m th e f o u l lin e .

I n th e s e m i- f i n a l s , p la y e r s S a ra L e c k ie , T a r a

T h e R e d m e n s h u t d o w n th e Q u e e n ’ s p o w e r p la y

p in g 2 9 g iv e - a w a y s . E v e n w it h

M u l l i n s , L e a h B a s s e l, T a r a N e w m a n , B e r n a d e t t e

as th e G o ld e n G a e ls f a i l e d t o c o n v e r t a n y o f t h e ir

th e s e e r ro rs , th e R e d m e n h a d d i f f i

T h is p r o v id e d th e m o m e n t u m

B r a d b u r y a n d A l e x J o rd a n w e re a ll v ic to r io u s in th e ir

e ig h t m a n a d v a n ta g e o p p o r tu n itie s .

c u l t y t a k in g a d v a n ta g e o f n u m e r

O tta w a n e e d e d t o ta k e a 1 2 - p o in t

o u s o p p o r tu n itie s .

le a d in t o th e lo c k e r r o o m — a le a d

T h e R e d m e n e n te r th is w e e k e n d in s e c o n d p la c e ,

m a tc h e s . M c G i l l f e l l 4 - 2 to Q u e e n ’ s in th e g o ld m e d a l g a m e . I n t w o e x c e p tio n a l p e rfo r m a n c e s , N e w m a n a n d

w it h C o n c o r d ia a n d O tta w a t r a ilin g b y o n ly t w o a n d

W h i l e th e R a v e n s w e re p l a y r e s p e c ta b le 3 7 p e r c e n t f r o m flo o r .

M a le fe n c e r s o n ta r g e t B e s t f i n i s h in h i s t o r y f o r M c G i l l

w o m e n ’s v o lle y b a ll

te a m

th e y w o u ld n o t r e lin q u is h . B e h i n d s u f f o c a t i n g d e fe n c e ,

i n g s lo p p i l y , M c G i l l s h o t a s e m i

th re e p o in ts r e s p e c tiv e ly .

J o rd a n w o n t h e ir m a tc h e s .

E v e n tu a lly

th e

Redm en

w h ic h

seem ed

phase

th e

R e d m e n , a n d s ix s e c o n d h a lf th r e e -

w o u l d o p e n u p a t e n - p o i n t le a d

p o in t e r s b y f o u r d i f f e r e n t G e e

T h e s u c c e s s fu l m e n 's f e n c i n g te a m h a d t h e i r

w i t h 6 :1 5 r e m a i n i n g , s p a r k e d b y

G e e s , th e R e d m e n s e e m e d b r o k e n .

O n t a r io U n iv e r s it ie s A t h le t ic s A s s o c ia tio n E a s t

th e in s ta n t o ff e n c e p r o v id e d b y P a t

M a tt W a ts o n ’ s fiv e

S e c tio n a ls o n S u n d a y in O tta w a .

I n g lis , w h o c h ip p e d i n s ix f i r s t - h a l f

D a v is ’ 11 in th e s e c o n d h a lf w e re

p o in t s a n d

T h e M c G i l l M a r t le t v o lle y b a ll te a m c lin c h e d sec

M c G i l l fin is h e d s e c o n d o u t o f 6 te a m s in ep ée,

p o in ts . J o e l P e a r lm a n a n d H u b e r t

n o t e n o u g h t o b r in g th e R e d m e n

o n d p la c e f o r th e ir h ig h e s t f in is h e v e r in Q u e b e c v o l

a d v a n c in g to th e f in a ls n e x t w e e k a t R o y a l M i l i t a r y

D a v i s b o t h g o t i n v o l v e d i n th e

b a c k in t o c o n te n tio n .

le y b a ll p la y .

C o lle g e . T h e y d id th is b y b e a tin g R M C 4 5 - 3 8 , a n d

a c tio n , b o th c o n t r ib u t in g e ig h t

T r e n t 4 5 -3 5 . H ig h lig h t s in c lu d e d Y v e s K o n ig s h o f f e r

p o in ts .

T h e M a r tle ts d e fe a te d th e U n iv e r s ité de M o n tr é a l 3-1 in a s p ir ite d S u n d a y a fte r n o o n a ff a ir .

p la c in g s ix th o u t o f 2 3 , a d v a n c in g to th e f in a ls n e x t

T h e M a r tle ts s tru g g le d a t th e o u ts e t, t r a ilin g 6 - 0 in th e f i r s t set. H o w e v e r , a ft e r a n a le r t t im e o u t, th e M a r tle ts re s p o n d e d w it h e x c e lle n t p la y .

w e e k as w e l l . T e a m m a t e s Z b i g n i e w

R u d z k i and

M a h e r A m e r p la c e d 1 0 th a n d 1 6 th r e s p e c tiv le y . T h e m e n d i d n o t fa r e as w e l l in f o i l , f in i s h i n g

A f t e r d r o p p in g th e f i r s t s e t 1 0 -1 5 , th e M a r tle ts d o m in a te d th e p la y , w in n in g 1 5 -2 , 1 5 -5 a n d 1 5 -1 0 .

f o u r t h o u t o f s ix te a m s —

n o t e n o u g h to a d v a n c e

E v e n t u a lly , R a w a s a n d D a v is f o u le d o u t w i t h

10 and

16 p o in t s

H o w e v e r , th e re a l s to r y o f th e

a p ie c e . W i t h u n d e r te n m in u te s to

f i r s t h a lf f o r th e R e d m e n w a s t h e ir

p la y , O tta w a p u lle d a w a y to a n 18-

f o u l s h o o tin g , w h ic h s a w th e m h it

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n a r r o w e d M c G i l l ’ s le a d t o 2 8 -2 1

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S p o r t s / W h a t ’ s O n Page 27

February 11th, 1997 T u e sd a y, F e b r u a r y ll

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3 9 8 - 7 0 1 7 . U p c o m in g P r i m e t im e s :

Friday, Feb. 21; Friday, Feb. 14th; 17:15hr-00:30hr 22:15hr-00:20hr Monday, Feb, 24th; Tuesday, Feb. 18th; 20:00hr-00:30hr 23:15hr-00:20hr Wednesday, Feb. 26th; 20:45hr-00:20hr Our rates are very competitive.

D o n 't m iss th is in cred ib le \

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* Limited time offer. Subject to approval by Chrysler Credit Canada Ltd. This offer may not be combined with any other. Inventory may vary depending on dealer. Details at participating dealers. ** Eligible graduates are those who have obtained or will obtain a college or university diploma from an accredited Canadian institution between January 1, 1996 and December 31, 1997 and who will take possession of their vehicle before December 31, 1997.