The McGill Tribune Vol. 20 Issue 15 by The Tribune

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M c G IL L T R IB U N E

ONLINE http://tribune.mcgill.ca

Published by the Students’ Society of McGill University

Same old genome— new choices B y H in a M a h m o o d _____________

“O ffering $ 1 0 0 ,0 0 0 for eggs from tall blonde athletic women,” says one ad. “Woman gives birth to grandchildren,” reads a head line. “V is it w w w .ronsangel.com and select your ideal egg,” says a web site that auctions o ff model’s eggs to the highest bidder. “This is Darwin’s ‘Natural Selection’ at its very best. The highest bidder gets youth, beauty and social skills.” U n fa ir ? M a y b e . W e ird ? D efin ite ly . Phenom ena such as these have lead many to question the ethics o f cloning, genetic deter minism, and gene patenting. Dr. Mansfield, a specialist in bioethics, addressed some o f the major con cerns caused by advances in genet ic engineering in a recent presenta tion at M cGill. Though genetic predetermina tio n is a c o n trib u tin g fa c to r to w ard s in te llig e n c e , p h y sic a l a ttrib u tes and p e rso n a lity , it is fo olish to assume that genes are the only input. A cartoon illustrates th is m is p e r c e p tio n : a k id g e ts caught with his hand in a candy ja r and the caption reads, “I couldn’t help it, I ’ m genetically predeter mined to steal.” M a n s fie ld a lso d isc u sse d human cloning, which seems ever more likely in light o f the recent anim al-cloning successes. Just as there are egg-auction websites, we may soon be presented with other unnatural possibilities: “Did your kid die in an acci d en t? W e can now b rin g him back. Call right now and we will a lso throw in 2 0 a d d itio n a l IQ points for no extra charge!” T h is hu m ou r, h o w ev er grotesque it may seem, is not such a fa r-fe tch e d idea. Im agin e, fo r example, being the parents o f out going, funny and athletic Jim , who dies in a fiery car crash. Is it rea sonable to tell them that, although

Pat Fok

Engaging in winter revelry, McGillScience students party their cares away at the Science Carnival2001

Crime and the Ghetto in Y2K B y Sh e h r y a r Fa z l i

As the year 2 0 0 0 cam e to a close, Police Station 19 evaluated the past year’ s crim e level in the M cG ill student ghetto, comparing rates to those o f previous years, and discussing plans to lessen the area’s vulnerability to misdeed. The area under the ju risd ic tion o f Station 19, located at 380 Prince Arthur in the M cG ill stu d en t G h e tto , e x te n d s fro m its northern and southern boundaries o f Mount R oyal, and Sherbrooke South, respectively, and from its east and w est bound aries o f S t. Laurent street and Parc Avenue, and Westmount. The second o f the post’s four zones o f administration encom p asses the U n iv ersity and the G h e tto stre tc h in g fro m the Milton Gates to Hutchison Street. W hile Y 2 K brought few sig

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nificant changes in most o f the cat egories o f offenses in Station 19’s study o f the Ghetto, it did present a striking change in the number of break-ins, with almost a hundred more homes being subject to bur g la ry in 2 0 0 0 th an in 1 9 9 9 . C onstable N elson M arshall sug gested possible factors contribut ing to the area’ s continually high level o f exposure to theft. “The Ghetto is more vulnera ble because thieves know that this is where students live and that, in all likelihood, they have not paid fo r th e s e c u rity m e a su re s th a t older residents in other areas have paid for,” he said.“There is a gen eral feeling that this area is less guarded than others.” Stu dents’ Society o f M cG ill U n iv e rs ity V ic e P re s id e n t C o m m u n ity and G o v e rn m e n t A ffairs Jerem y Farrell added his

view s on the som ew hat exposed position o f student homes. “The Ghetto is very vulnera ble,” he said. “[Students] make up a very transient population. Our neighbours do not know who we are and [therefore] cannot look out fo r stra n g ers. O ur s tu ff is very portable b ecau se we are alw ays moving, and it is these portables that are easy to steal. Students also spend a lo t o f tim e aw ay from h o m e, le a v in g th e ir h om es unguarded for long stretches.” Marshall stressed the need for students to be all the m ore cau tious in protecting themselves and their possessions in such a suscep tible area. He offered a number o f tips that, w hile they are sim ple, ca n n e v e rth e le ss d eter th ie v e s, including: leaving the lights or the televisio n on when not at hom e; leaving small valuables away from

w in d o w s; and k n o w in g o n e ’ s neighbours. Furthermore, Marshall asserted that students should not hesitate to call the police in case o f even the slightest threat. “The more obstacles you have to being a victim , the better,” he said. “So if you see someone who seems even a little suspicious, you should call 9 -1 -1 . I mean, i f you see someone ju st loitering around som ew h ere, and w alking som e w h ere th en c o m in g b a c k , then w a lk in g so m e w h ere e ls e , then coming back, you can just make an anonymous call to the police and te ll th em . T h e p o lic e w ill then show up and question the individ ual. T h is will give a feeling o f a security presence in the area.” Marshall will meet with other o ffic e rs this w eek to d iscu ss an action plan in prom oting safety

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40 12 , Saint Denis street Corner Duluth (514 ) 844 1919

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News

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

How the York TAs got their grooves back Union vote results in continued stalem ate By M

ike

Ba r g a v

Trepidation over a lost sem es ter and p o s s ib le a ca d e m ic d is p la ce m e n t have tak en the v an guard o f issues at York University in re ce n t m onths. M u ch o f this anxiety has been brought about by the prolonged strike o f teaching a ssista n ts, co n tra ct fa cu lty , and graduate and research assistants o v e r c o n tr a c t d is s a tis f a c tio n . Progress toward reconciliation o f administrative and C U PE 39 0 3 's, the part o f the union representing Y ork reached yet another impasse January 5th as the union rejected the University's proposal by a 63% majority. The vote, w hich was forced upon the three bargaining units o f the C U P E 3 9 0 3 , T each ers a ssis ta n ts , c o n tr a c t fa c u lty , and GA/RAs was met with strong dis approval. "Our employer, the University went to the Board o f Labour and used an O ntario law that allow s the employer to use a forced vote in c o n tr a c t n e g o tia tio n s . T h e Union thought it was a bad idea and recom m end ed that the b a r gaining team vote no on the con tract. It is a p iece o f leg islation that undermines democratic labour negotiation," said David Camfield,

Chair o f the Strike Committee. A ll units except the contract faculty voted against the contract. Mike Ma, media representative for the strik e c o m m itte e , sp eak in g a fte r th e c o n tr a c t r e je c t io n , ascribed the lack in strike progress with recalcitrancy and unfairness on the University's part. "T h e s tr ik e is o n g o in g b e c a u s e th e u n iv e rs ity d o e s n 't want to spend its $18 million sur plus on anything other than admins tra tiv e s a la r ie s . T h is strik e is a p p a re n tly so m e th in g the U niversity thinks is worth losing the year over." M a fu rth e r e x p la in e d th a t union dissatisfaction over the con tract was a result in a rétrograda tion o f what was offered by the U niversity. Am ong the mandates o f the union are to preserve tuition in d e x in g and c h a n g e w ag es to meet inflation, improved contracts fo r graduate and teaching a ssis tants that ensure transparency and equity, tuition protections, health benefits, and a fair hiring policy. "W e are basically ju st waiting for them to offer what we had last year. W hat they are offering is a rollback. All we want is the same contract we had last year and we would go back to work. W e are n ot a c c e p tin g th e s e r o llb a c k s

b ecau se o f the U n iv ersity 's $ 1 8 million surplus," said Ma. Those on the other side o f the bargaining table however pointed out the detrimental effect a contin ued strike has on the student popu lation. Dianne Cunningham, Minister o f T r a in in g , C o lle g e s and Universities spoke o f the necessity o f the strikers to return to work to ensure the continuance o f lecture in a media statement after Friday's no vote. "It is long past time for all parties at Y ork U niversity to put the interests o f the students first, and do ev ery th in g n e cessa ry to ensure that classes resume imme diately," said Cunningham. "I'm pleased to see that con tra c t fa cu lty and the u n iv ersity ad m in istratio n have reach ed an agreement. However, in thé inter e st o f Y o rk 's stu d ents, I w ould hop e th a t a ll p a rtie s w ill now a llo w stu d en ts to retu rn to the classroom as negotiations resume betw een the rem aining units and the administration." Making reference to the fact that all three units o f the the union were not in accordance with the general vote, the contract faculty voting 58% in favour o f accepting the U n iv e r s ity 's o f fe r . S u sa n Bigelow o f York Media Relations

M cG ill B a skeW a il Friday Jan

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dents as bargaining tool. "Senate regulation 8 protects the students. Students cannot be academ ically penalized for break ing the picket line. It's not the best protection but it's better than most bodies have. The University can not as easily use students as batter ing rams to end labour disputes," he said. As it stands the York's winter term has not begun yet, as classes from the fall semester still remain unfinished. Pending a resolution, the b eg in n in g o f Y o rk 's w inter sem este r w ill be preced ed by a remedial period for the unfinished fall semester, and a exam period. The next semester is tentative, set to begin in February, amidst talks o f possible relocation o f students to other universities, and classes running into the summer break.

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spoke o f the possiblity o f contract faculty returning to work to allow for the continuance o f the academ ic year. "W e w e lco m e the p o sitiv e vote from Unit two. W e are there fore calling on all members o f the facu lty, con tract facu lty, and all others who are willing to work, to m eet their students beginning in the week o f Monday, January 8, in the regularly scheduled time slots and classroom s," she said. "It is essential that undergrad u a tes and g ra d u a te stu d e n ts resume their studies now and we are doing all in our power to see that this will happen. W e will be using all possible means to inform all students in the com ing w eek about the resum ption o f the fall term." Cam field however, explained the im plausibity o f a solution in w h ich som e m em b er w ere s till striking and some were teaching. "T h is would be a bad situa tio n . S o m e w ould be te a c h in g , some wouldn't be. The picket lines would still be up. It would be total chaos," he said. Cam field also explained that U n iv e rs ity S e n a te le g is la tio n s shield students from the deleteri ous effects o f the strike, and criti cized York's strategy o f using stu

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News

T he M cG ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 T uesday 2001

Indigo's proposed

Crime in

takeover of Chapters

the ghetto

generate concern B y D ean M

alka

Chapters Inc. has found itself under the m edia sp o tlig h t once more as it prepares to carry out a s e r ie s o f fin a n c ia l m a n e u v e rs in te n d e d to th w art a h o s tile ta k e o v e r bid by T rilo g y R e ta il Enterprises Inc. The bookstore com pany has been fighting o ff the much hyped o ffe r made by G erald Schw artz, the business mogul best known to the general public for his attempt at purchasing and con so lid atin g both A ir C an ad a and C an ad ian airlines last year through the Onex corp. Despite attempts to woo its target's shareholders, the Trilogy offer has failed to gather sufficient momentum to ensure an acquisi tion, w hich Sch w artz w ishes to c o n c lu d e in o rd e r to m e rg e Chapters with his w ife, H eather Reisman's, Indigo books. C h a p te rs' m an ag em en t has taken the additional time granted by the lukewarm response to the offer, which has now been extend ed beyond its original January 3rd d e a d lin e , as an o p p o rtu n ity to increase shareholder value in order to render the T rilo g y o ffe r less appealing. A lre a d y , C h a p te rs has a n n o u n ce d p la n s to p u rc h a se m in o rity s ta k e s in C h a p te rs Online, which is a separate com p an y, and a d d itio n a l sh a re s o f Pegasus W holesale, a m ajor book w h o le sa le r b ased in B ra m p to n , Ontario. Schwartz has replied to these actions by criticizing their finan cial soundness. However, Chapters maintains that their activities will benefit all shareholders with added value including Schwartz. A Chapters shareholder, who w ish ed to re m a in a n o n y m o u s, offered his view on why there has been so much resistan ce toward the Trilogy offer at all. "It's a not good enough [the offer] for me to take since they're only giving a small premium over the price, and I'm certain the stock

its e lf w ill be w orth m ore pretty soon -assuming the market doesn't keep on crashing," he said. The shareholder also cited a circular issued by Chapters' board o f d ir e c to r s , w h ic h , alth o u g h som ew hat biased, sum m arized a few re a so n s why sh a re h o ld e rs sh o u ld n o t a g re e to th e o f fe r . Prominently figuring in the leaflet is an analysis by a large in vest m ent b a n k , N M R o th s c h ild & S o n s, su g g estin g : "T h e o ffe r is inadequate, from a financial point o f view, to Chapters' shareholders other than Trilogy". It further cited potential alterations imposed upon Trilogy by the competition bureau, and suggested that the fo rm er's fu tu re in te n tio n s re m a in e d ambiguous. As far as the coffee that will be available, Chapters is partnered with Starbuck’s outlets in most o f its superstores. That may change with Trilogy takeover, as the com pany is intent on using the Indigo in-store cafe model. T h e last co n sid era tio n may s im p ly be a m a tte r o f ta s te as In d ig o sh o p p er M a r g u e rite Beauchamps noted. "I love the modern look and com fy chairs at Indigo," she said. "B u t sometimes I go to Chapters b eca u se they have m ore b ook s, and better coffee."

Page 3

Changes in the num ber of reported incidents to M U C Police in the M cGill Ghetto

C ontinued from Page 1 m e a su re s in th e z o n e s un der S ta tio n 19 ’ s ju r is d ic tio n . M e a n w h ile, F a rre ll is w orking with S SM U Safety Commissioner Vincent Escanlar to encourage the University’ s students to take extra p recau tio n s in th eir d ay -to-d ay liv es, through a number o f pro g ram s in c lu d in g an a w a ren e ss p o ster cam paign and providing inform ational data on the Safety Com m ission’s website, located at th e In te rn e t a d d re ss: ssmu.mcgill.ca/safety. Escanlar was unavailable for comment.

Reported incidents

1999

2000

Forced robbery - commerce Forced robbery - personal Break-in - residence Break-in - commerce Break-in - other (garages etc.) Car theft Car break-in Car vandalism Sexual crimes

4 4 128 42 2 80 117 11 10

2 8 223 40 0 59 150 9 9

Total in study

398

500 (+26%)

Source: m e Poke

SN O W -A P III JAN U ARY 8 -1 2 ,2 0 0 1 1 2 -8 PM D a lly M e G lir s lo w e r H o ld D rin k s , Fo o d , R o n d s , D is in a H e a te d T o n illl For more info, call Mark Chodos at 398-6799, or email snowap@ssmu.mcgill.ca

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News

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

New Canada stu dent loan providers selected • O TTAW A — E D U L IN X C anada and B D P B u s in e s s Data Services Canada w ill a d m in is te r the Canada Student Loan P ro g ra m s ta rtin g in M a rch 2 0 0 1 , h av in g been granted re s p e c tively $91.6 and $45.7 m illio n c o n tra c ts by H um an R eso u rces D evelopm ent Canada in December 2000. E D U L IN X w ill handle students attend ing p u b lic ly -fu n d e d post-secondary institu tions, while B D P will administer the loans o f students attending pri vately-funded schools. B o th c o m p a n ie s will be responsible for the ad m inistration o f loan d is b u rs e m e n ts , th e m a n a g e m e n t o f accounts while student borrow ers are attend ing th e s c h o o l, the c o n s o lid a tio n and

repayment o f loans, and the man agement o f student loan debt while student borrow ers are in rep ay ment. The contracts expire in March 2004, but provide for the possibili ty o f two one-year extensions.

U of T professor compares December 6 memorial to Ku Klux Klan • T O R O N T O — U n iv e rs ity o f T oron to ad m inistrators and stu dents attacked a U o f T professor’s c o m m e n ts re g a rd in g the U n iv ersity ’ s annual m em orial o f the 1 9 8 9 É c o le P o ly te c h n iq u e massacre. P r o fe s s o r C h a rle s R a c k o f f expressed his views in his reply to a departmental reminder about the D ecember 6 memorial. “It is obvious that the point o f this is not to rem em ber anyone,” read an e x tra c t o f R a c k o f f’ s em ail, quoted in a U o f T student union press release. “The point is to use the deaths o f these people as an e x c u s e to p ro m o te the Fem inist/Extrem e left-w ind [sic] agenda. It is no different, and no more ju stified , than when organi zations such as the Klu-Klux-Klan [s ic ] use the m urder o f a w hite

i n

person by a b la ck person as an excu se to prom ote their agenda. (Even the K K K , as far as I know, has never suggested that all B lack people should wear white ribbons to apologize for the collective sins o f their race.)” U. of T. S tu d e n ts ’ Adm inistrative Council president A d am B r e th o lz d em an d ed an immediate public censure inquiry into R a c k o ff s comments. Robert Birgenau, president o f U o f T , w hile ca llin g R a c k o f f s views “repugnant” in a statement released on D ecem ber 7 , said he “acknow ledge^] the difficulty o f balancing deeply disturbing views expressed by members o f our com munity with the University’ s fun damental principle o f free speech.” S A C E q u ity C o m m issio n er E rick a D uffy said in response to B irgenau ’ s statem ent that “ [i]t is not difficult at all, and these views are not ju st ‘deeply disturbing’ . It is absolutely unbelievable that the U n iv ersity , in this day and age, should not think that an attack o f this nature, on the dignity o f every woman at this institution, should be allowed to masquerade as any thing other than what it is: v io lence.”

i t h

S tu a rt M cLean

M a rk K ingw ell April 19, 2001 Award-winning political and cultural theorist, Professor of Philosophy at the University of Toronto, and author of five books including The World We Want: Virtue, Vice and the Good Citizen.

W endy M esley May 10, 2001 Winner of the 1999 Gemini Award for her role as Host of UNDERcurrents, a current affairs show known for its incisive look at how media and technology are affecting our lives.

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Inform ation or R ese rvatio n (514)482-4685 Doors will open at 7:00 p.m. & lecture will begin at 7:30 p.m.

• O T T A W A — I f you are up to your eyeballs in debt over unpaid credit card b ills, Canadian bank ruptcy law allow s you to declare ban k ru p tcy and d isch arg e your debt after nine months o f incurring it. I f you are up to your eyeballs in debt over your university educa tion , this sam e law only allow s you to discharge it (in the event o f insolvency) ten years after ceasing studies. This state o f affairs is one the Canadian Federation o f Students hopes to change follow ing a con s titu tio n a l c h a lle n g e o f the B an k ru p tcy and In so lv e n cy A ct filed in the Ontario Superior Court o f Justice on December 7. The Application and Notice of Constitutional Question, which the C F S file d on b e h a lf o f a recen t g ra d u a te , a rg u e s th a t a 1 9 9 8 amendment to the Act violates sec tions 7 and 15 (1) o f the Charter o f Rights and Freedoms. T h e 1998 am endm ent made student loans n on -d ischargeable fo r ten years after studies cease. The Act had also been amended in 1997, prohibiting the discharge of student loans until after 2 years. T h e C F S a rg u es th a t the a m en d m en t is d is c rim in a to r y b eca u se it cre a te s a d istin ctio n b etw ee n stu d en t and co n su m e r debtors.

. . .

January 25, 2001 Author of The Vinyl Café, Unplugged (2000), Stories from the Vinyl Café (1998), Home From the Vinyl Cafe (1995), Morningside World of Stuart McLean (1989), and winner of the Canadian Authors • Association Best Non Fiction Book for Welcome Home (1993).

G en eral A dm ission

CFS files constitutional challenge to Bankruptcy Act

Lower Canada College

Kentucky State U. students prevail in landmark censorship ruling • (U -W IR E ) W A SH IN G T O N — The U .S. Court o f Appeals for the S ix th C irc u it ru led F rid a y that Kentucky State University admin is tr a to r s v io la te d th e F ir s t Amendment when they seized all copies o f a 1993 student yearbook they claimed lacked quality. The landmark 10-3 ruling in K in c a id v s. G ib so n re v e rs e d a 1 9 9 9 d is tr ic t co u rt ru lin g and decided not to apply the Supreme C ourt’ s 1988 Hazelw ood School District vs. Kuhlmeier standard to college publications. In that deci sio n , the C o u rt ru led that high school newspapers do not qualify as a public forum and that admin istration has the authority to pre vent speech it consid ers against the school’s educational mission. “ C o n fis c a tio n ra n k s w ith fo rc e d g o v e rn m e n t s p e e c h as amongst the purest forms o f con ten t a lte r a tio n ,” Ju d g e R . G uy C ole wrote in Frid ay ’ s decision.

McGill’s latest Rhodes Scholar

fia

4099 Royal Avenue, Montreal, Quebec H4A 2M5

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S ' m

A strid C h risto ffersenD eb b e ca m e the U n iv e r s ity ’ s la te s t R h o d e s S c h o la r on N o v em b e r 25. C h r is to ffe r s e n -D e b graduates from M cG ill next June, and will then pursue graduate studies in the philosophy, polit ica l scie n ce , and e c o n o m ics p ro gram at

“W e will not sanction a reading o f the First Amendment that permits g o v ern m en t o f fic ia ls to ce n so r e x p r e s s io n in a lim ite d p u b lic forum in order to co erce speech that pleases the government. The K S U ... o ffic ia ls ’ actions violate the Constitution.” The case stems from the pub lication o f the Thorobred, K S U ’ s student y earb o o k , in an ed ition th at c o v e r e d th e 1 9 9 2 - 9 3 and 1 9 9 3 -9 4 school years. University officials deemed “was not o f prop er quality and did not represent the school a(s) it should.” The univer sity locked away all 2 ,0 0 0 copies o f the yearbook. T h e y e a rb o o k fe a tu red the theme “Destination Unknown” and a purple cover. University officials claimed the theme was vague and inappropriate and the cover did not feature school colors. T hen-K SU President Mary Smith also object ed to a lack o f captions under pho tographs and the inclusion o f too m any p h o to g ra p h s d e p ic tin g celebrities and current events. Yearbook editor Capri Coffer said during the proceedings that she w as sim p ly c o n v e y in g the thoughts and feelings o f K SU stu dents at the time, when uncertainty about the future dominated cam pus life. In th e d ay s fo llo w in g the U n iv e r s ity ’ s c o n f is c a tio n o f $ 9 ,0 0 0 worth o f student-funded yearb o o k s, student p u blication s adviser Laura Cullen was relieved o f her duties and placed on a tem porary secretarial assignm ent in th e U n iv e r s ity ’ s O f f ic e o f Housing. In 1 9 9 5 , C o ffe r and fello w K SU student Charles Kincaid filed suit against K S U President Mary Smith, V ice President for Student Affairs Betty Gibson, and individ ual m e m b ers o f the B o a rd o f Regents. Their suit alleged the vio la tio n o f th e ir F ir s t and 14th Amendment rights. The students’ case navigated more than five years o f legal wran g lin g and to o k a s e tb a c k in September 1999 — a decision that stood in stark contrast to rulings o f the previous 3 0 years. In a rare m o v e , the C o u rt o f A p p ea ls scrapped its in itial d ecisio n and a g re e d in N o v e m b e r 1 9 9 9 to re h e a r the ca s e b e fo re a larg er panel o f judges. — with file s fro m Zeb Eckert,

U-WIRE (DC Bureau)

Oxford University. At h er tim e in M c G ill, Christoffersen-Deb has held posi tions as chair o f the WHO Health A s s e m b ly at M c G i l l ’ s M o d el U n ited N atio n s C o n fe re n c e , as presid ent o f the U nited N ations Stu d en t A s s o c ia tio n o f M c G ill U n iv ersity , and has also been a member o f the admissions commit tee fo r the Facu lty o f M ed icine. Her goal is to become a doctor in developing countries.

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bring you this fantastic massage course. Shiatsu is one of the most

ch a n ce ! Jo in the b allro o m d an cin g co u rse an d learn .the w altz, foxtrot an d m ore. Y o u r session w ith instructor Linda Chou will be filled w ith fun, exercise and g reat m usic. Leath er so led sh o es are

com plete massage techniques in the world. It is an incredibly effec

recom m en d ed . Wednesday 8:30-10:00pm Shatner, Room 301 Cost: $ 3 5

in order to lessen o r rid the body o f ach es and pains. Shiatsu can be d on e through the clothes so there is n o need to get undressed. A

tive relaxation technique, based on concepts o f physical and spiritual balance. Pressure is applied to accupoints to unlock stagnant energy

partner is recom m ended. Bring a towel. Mats will b e provided. T u e sd a y s S e ctio n 0 1 : 7 :3 0 -9 :0 0 p m S e c tio n 0 2 : 9 :0 0 - 1 0 :3 0 p m R o o m 1 2 0 3 B r o w n B u ild in g Cost: $ 4 0 B e the star o n the d an ce floor this year! K eep up w ith the latest

Planning to travel to Italy in the n e a r future? O r alw ays d ream ed

tren d s in d an cin g by learn in g th e m o d ern tw ist o n the tan g o ,

o f learning the langu age o f love? O u r e x p e rie n c e d te a c h e r will n o t o n ly guid e y o u th rou g h the

salsa, m eren g u e, ch a ch a an d m o re w ith o u r professional instruc tors from the SalsaEtc D an ce School. Music from A rgentina, Brazil an d the D om inican Republic, o r bring in y o u r o w n favorite tape.

b asics but will also enlighten you w ith h er first-hand know led ge

L eath er soled sh o es are recom m en d ed . M o n d a y s S e c t i o n 0 1 , B e g i n n e r s : 7 :0 0 - 8 :3 0 p m

N o prior k n o w led g e o f the Italian langu age required. T h u r s d a y s 6 :0 0 -7 :3 0 p m B r o w n B u ild in g , R o o m 1 2 0 3 Cost: $ 4 0

S e c tio n 0 2 ,

o f the p eop le, th e culture, history and, o f co u rse, the food!

In te rm e d ia te : 8 :3 0 -1 0 :0 0 p m S h a tn e r, R o o m 3 0 1 Cost: $ 4 5

N ow is y o u r opportunity to learn to d an ce to the g reat ro ck ‘n ’

Y o g a is a scien ce w h ich exp lo res w ays to re d u ce stress, im prove

roll an d big band m usic o f the 4 0 ’s an d 5 0 ’s, as w ell as the m o d ern sw ing revival! Swing, jive, ro ck ‘n ’ roll steps, an d individual ch o reo g rap h y g eared tow ards y o u will all b e p art o f the sessions

c o n c e n tra tio n , to n e m u scles, a n d in cre a se flexibility. S ession s include physical p ostu res, breath aw aren ess, d eep relaxation and guid ance on b etter nutrition. T h e benefits o f Y o g a are far re a ch

taught by professional instructors from the M ontreal rek n ow n ed

ing. C o n trol o f a p p e tite an d in cre a se d ale rtn e ss a re o n ly tw o

Miss W o o lfs Jiving School. This y e a r w e are introducing an inter

e x a m p le s o f h o w y o g a ca n h elp y o u . W e a r lo o se co m fo rtab le

m ed iate co u rse for th o se alread y fam iliar w ith th e b asic steps.

clothing and bring a tow el o r mat. T h u rs d a y s 6 :0 0 -7 :3 0 p m B r o w n B u ild in g , R o o m 1 2 0 3 Cost: $ 4 0

L eather soled sh o es are recom m en d ed . M o n d a y s S e c t i o n 0 1 , B e g i n n e r s : 4 :0 0 - 5 :3 0 p m S e c t i o n 0 2 , In te rm e d ia te : 5 :3 0 - 7 :0 0 p m S h a tn e r, R o o m 3 0 1 C ost: $ 4 0 M o d ern b re a k d a n cin g is a c o m b in a tio n o f th e o ld E ast C o ast b reak dan cin g, B rooklyn U p-R ock and d ow n -rock and W est Coast

This co u rse will co m b in e b asic martial art techn iq ues w ith m o d e rn a e r o b ic m o v e m e n ts to d e liv e r a n in te n s e w o r k o u t th a t

Locking, B o u g ou lou and Pop pin g.

ern b reak d an ce m oves, o u r instructor will teach yo u o f the history

im p roves strength, m u scle to n e, and en d u ran ce. By the e n d of this eight class .session you will e x p e rie n ce im proved card io fit

o f b reak d an ce. M usic includes the o ld -sch o o l styles o f DJ Clue an d G h etto rig in al P ro d u ctio n s. N o te th at alth o u g h th e m o v e s

ness, stress red u ction, and self-defense tactics. W hether' y o u are in sh ap e, out o f sh ap e, begin ner o r ad van ced , this class is for you.

taught in this co u rse are ch o se n w ith resp ect to safety, they can

Tou ght b y an acco m p lish ed an d e x p e rie n ce d instructor, y o u will

b e physically dem anding. W e d n e s d a y s S e c t io n 0 1 : 4 - 5 :3 0 p m S e c t io n 0 2 : 5 :3 0 - 7 :0 0 p m

receiv e the b est m eth od o f instm ction possible! W e d n e sd a y s 7 :0 0 -8 :3 0 p m S h a tn e r B u ild in g , R o o m 3 0 1 Cost: $ 4 0

As w ell as teach in g you m o d

S h a tn e r, R o o m 3 0 1 Cost: $ 4 0

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Run by the Harris Institute, this extrem ely p op ular sp eed reading

D ue to p o p u lar d em an d , w e a re e x cite d to o n c e again offer a

co u rse, is o n c e again being offered at McGill. This 1-d ay class alw ays gets rave review s and regularly has students im p rove 50150% in reading sp eed. As w ell, co m p reh en sio n and reten tion are

b asic sketching class. O ur instructor will help you d evelo p the o b s e rv a tio n sk ills n e c e s s a r y fo r a b a s ic re n d e rin g o f s h a p e . O bjects, p eo p le and p laces (aro u n d McGill) will serve as subjects

m aintained and som etim es im proved. D o n ’t miss y o u r ch a n ce to

to draw as students exp lo re form , p roportion, textu re, and light

im prove y o u r reading skills for life! O n e - d a y , S a t u r d a y F e b r u a r y 3 r d 9 :3 0 a m - 4 :3 0 p m ,

an d dark con trasts. B ro w n

Is y o u r F re n ch gettin g a bit rusty?

(w e a th e r p erm ittin g !).

A b a sic m aterials list, n o t in e x c e s s o f

$ 3 5 .0 0 , will b e p rovid ed by the instructor. W e d n e sd a y s 4 :0 0 - 6 :0 0 p m B r o w n B u ild in g , R o o m 1 2 0 3 Cost: $ 4 5

B u ild in g , R o o m 1 2 0 3 Cost: $ 5 5

using it aro u n d M ontreal?

C lasses will b e held ind oors and o u td oo rs

D o y o u n o t feel co m fo rtab le

T h en co n sid e r o u r m in i-co u rse as an

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O n c e y o u g ra d u a te M cG ill, y o u w ill h o p e fu lly m a k e e n o u g h m o n e y to a d v a n ce fro m D ep w in e.

So learn w h a t lies b e y o n d

e x ce lle n t w a y to acq u ire co n fid e n ce in y o u r sp o k e n F ren ch .

"B ab y D uck" an d "Si,Si,Si"!! O u r p rofession al w in e instru ctor will

S ection 01 is fo r b egin n ers w h o h a v e a b asic k n o w led g e o f sp o k e n F r e n c h , S e c ti o n 0 2 is f o r s t u d e n t s w h o h a v e a m o r e

t e a c h y o u h o w th e w in e is m a d e , th e a p p r o p r ia te w in e to

a d v a n ce d k n o w led g e o f th e F re n ch lan gu age.

e n c e b etw een a C h ard on n ay, C ab ern et an d a M erlot. W in e sa m

W e d n e s d a y s S e c t io n 0 1 , B e g i n n e r s : 6 :3 0 - 8 :0 0 p m S e c t io n 0 2 ,

p les will b e availab le fo r tasting.

In t e r m e d ia t e : 8 :0 0 - 9 :3 0 p m M a r y a n d W illia m B r o w n S t u d e n t

F e b r u a r y 1 2 th , 6 -9 p m S h a t n e r c a fe te ria C o st: $ 3 5

c h o o s e w ith a m eal, an d w in e tasting etiq uette.

Learn th e differ

S e rv ic e s B u ild in g , R o o m 1 2 0 3 C o st: $ 3 5

Searching for an opp ortun ity to im p rove o n y o u r Spanish? This

T ired o f d rink in g th e sam e drinks? W a n t to b e a b e tte r host?

sem ester w e are pleased to offer o u r first b egin ners Spanish mini

Trying to find em ploym ent? H ere’s the co u rse that solves all o f

co u rse. O ur e x p e rie n ce d instru ctor will refresh fo rg o tten w ord s

y o u r problem s! Intro to bartending will te a ch y o u the b asics of

and phrases as w ell as teach n ew o n es for all practical situations. All in a fun and ed u ca tional setting. T ake this co u rse an d you will b e thrilled w ith the results! T h u rs d a y s 8 :0 0 -9 :3 0 p m B r o w n B u ild in g , R o o m 1 2 0 3 C ost: $ 4 0

being a b artender. Y o u will learn the ap prop riate u sage o f glass w are, different tech n iq u es o f social p rep aratio n , as w ell as the m ixing and tasting o f ton s o f great drinks! W h at b etter w a y to start y o u r Sunday? Instruction and eq uipm ent provided by the M asters S chool o f Bartending. S e c tio n 0 1 : J a n u a r y 21 st, l- 4 p m S e c tio n 0 2 : J a n u a r y 2 8 th , l- 4 p m 1 1 0 S h e rb ro o k e (b e lo w O m n i H o te l) C ost: $ 3 5

Please check www.ssmu.ca/mini for any last minute changes or updates. Sorry no refunds! Non-McGill Students must pay $5 extra. Questions? Call Sarah Rachlin or Dani Organ at 398-3001, extension 09244, or e-mail us at mini@ssmu.mcgill.ca.

Page 6 O p / E d

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

EDITORIAL

Letters

“ W hatever will b e will be. ”

SSMU'S RED HERRINGS

-Doris Day

2001 vs. 1984: back to the future B y James Em p r in g h a m _______________________________________________ T h e te rm " v is io n a r y " is o n e w h ic h , in th e y e a r 2 0 0 1 , is p r o b a b ly a p p lie d to o f r e q u e n t ly th r o u g h o u t s o c ie ty . T h e re is lit t le d o u b t, h o w e v e r, th a t t w o m e n w o r t h y o f th e m o n ik e r a re G e o rg e O r w e ll a n d S ta n le y K u b r ic k . B o th fa r a h e a d o f t h e ir tim e , e a c h m a d e a fo re c a s t re g a r d in g th e s ta te o f h u m a n a ffa irs in th e d is ta n t fu tu r e ; O r w e ll in th e n o v e l " 1 9 8 4 " , a n d K u b r ic k ( w it h h e lp f r o m a u t h o r A r t h u r C . C la rk e ) in th e f ilm "2 0 0 1 : A S p a c e O d y s s e y ." A s is t h e n a t u r e o f th e R o m a n C a le n d a r , t h a t o n c e " d is t a n t " fu tu re , has q u ic k ly c o m e u p o n us. N a t u r a lly , a q u e s tio n th a t a rise s c o n c e rn s th e a c c u r a c y o f th e t w o v is io n a r y p r o g n o s tic a tio n s . W h o w a s m o r e c la ir v o y a n t , O r w e l l o r K u b r ic k ? B e fo r e a ju d g e m e n t is m a d e , th e r e m a r k a b le s im ila r itie s b e tw e e n e a c h v is io n m u s t b e r e c o g n iz e d . " 1 9 8 4 " w a s p u b lis h e d in 1 9 4 9 — t h ir t y - f iv e y e a rs b e fo r e th e d a te th a t it fo re c a s te d . " A S p a c e O d y s s e y " w a s fir s t s c re e n e d in 1 9 6 8 — th ir t y - t h r e e y e a rs b e fo re its s e ttin g . B o th v is io n s c a u tio n a g a in s t th e d a n g e rs o f u n q u e s tio n e d o b e d ie n c e a n d th e sta te s o f d e p e r s o n a liz a t io n a n d t h o u g h t - c o n t r o l th a t re s u lt. O r w e ll a n d K u b r ic k a ls o b o th r e je c te d th e b e lie f th a t t e c h n o lo g ic a l a d v a n c e s h o ld in t r in s ic v a lu e , a n d th e y b e lie v e d u n le s s a c c o m p a n ie d b y a s im ila r a d v a n c e in m o r a l re s p o n s iv e n e s s , te c h n o lo g y c o u ld n o t b e c o n s id e re d p ro g re s s iv e . T h e s im ila r itie s b e tw e e n th e t w o v is io n s a re , h o w e v e r , m a in ly th e m a tic . O r w e ll's " 1 9 8 4 " is a p o lit ic a l s a tire a n d is n o t e w o r t h y f o r in t r o d u c in g te rm s s u c h as "n e w s p e a k " , " d o u b le t h in k " , a n d o f c o u rs e

I was recently forwarded a copy o f the latest Red Herring, a magazine I was once a part o f many years ago. The issue is rife with material related to ongoing ten sio n s b etw een S S M U e x e c u tiv e s and the R ed Herring’s editors. It is disheartening to view the pat tern o f the S SM U in regards to the Red Herring — constantly throwing up obstacles, using student society red tape to gain leverage, and fanatically focussing on the bottom line. The SSM U has used red herrings like “multiple complaints about content”, “a tough adver tising sell”, and “what you print is not funny” again and again over the years, but to what end? Y es, the Red Herring loses money, but to those who are am b itiou s and cre a tiv e enough to put it together and the students who leaf through copies dur ing exam s for a quick chuckle, it is well worth the numbers on a piece o f SSM U letterhead. It is obvious that every V P O perations tries to keep the budget under control, but finance com m ittee m eetings, o f which I was a part o f last year, are arbitrary at best. W e take a look at a proposed budget or request for funding and either nip and tuck or cut entire items out. These decisions are not based on degrees in finance and economics — they are based on the bottom line. Big numbers bad — small numbers good. I say leave the damn magazine alone. They aren’t hurting any body and they lose less money in a semester than the executives rack up on their expense accounts.

" B ig B ro th e r" in to o u r le x ic o n . E x a m p le s o f n e w s p e a k a b o u n d in c u r r e n t p o lit ic a l r h e to r ic , th o u g h th e re c e n t e le c tio n o f M r . D u b y a c o n fir m s th e s u s p ic io n th a t d o u b le t h in k is s till a f o r e ig n c o n c e p t t o s o m e e le c to ra te s . B ig B r o th e r is as a liv e as e v e r, b u t n o t e v e n O r w e ll c o u ld h a v e p r e d ic te d th a t its c o n c e p t w o u ld b e m a d e p o p u la r to th e p u b lic th a n k s to a c o u p le g u y s n a m e d R u d y a n d R ic h a rd ? O r w e l l 's v is io n f a lt e r s in s o m e a re a s . T h e c r u m b lin g o f th e Eastern b lo c in th e e a r ly n in e tie s s h o w s O r w e ll's w a r n in g a g a in s t th e im m in e n t t h r e a t o f t o t a lit a r ia n re g im e s t o b e o v e r ly d r a m a tic , th o u g h in 1 9 8 4 , R u ssia w a s s till v ie w e d as a w o r ld p o w e r . W h ile th e E nd o f H is t o r y is u n lik e ly , so a re th e c h a n c e s o f th e r e g u la te d e c o n o m y d e s c r ib e d in " 1 9 8 4 " e v e r b e c o m in g g lo b a l r e a lit y . A m o r e lik e ly t h r e a t p re s e n ts it s e lf in th e s c e n a r io o f e n v ir o n m e n ta l d e g r a d a tio n d u e t o u n re g u la te d in d u s try , a t th e h a n d s o f c a p it a lis t ic v e n tu r e . K u b r ic k 's v is io n o f 2 0 0 1 , o n th e o th e r h a n d , s till se e m s t o a h e a d o f its tim e . A t th e c u s p o f a n e w m ille n n iu m , th e d e b a te c o n c e r n in g a r t if ic ia l in t e llig e n c e , a th e m e th a t K u b r ic k p re s e n ts in th e m o v ie t h r o u g h th e s u p e r c o m p u t e r H A L - 9 0 0 0 , w i l l b e c o m e e v e n m o r e p r e v a le n t in s o c ie ty . O th e r p r e d ic tio n s o f th e f ilm h a v e a lr e a d y b e e n c o n fir m e d . T h e A m e r ic a n a n d R u ssia n s p a c e p ro g ra m s a re c o - o p e r a t in g , h u m a n s c a n c o m m u n ic a t e t h r o u g h v id e o m o n it o r , a n d v e lc r o , w h ic h th e a s tro n a u ts w o r e a n d w a s a t an e x p e r im e n ta l p h a s e b a c k in 1 9 6 8 , is u s e d f r e q u e n t ly in th e re a l 2 0 0 1 . ( A lth o u g h I s h o u ld p r o b a b ly s till le a rn t ie m y s h o e s.) K u b r ic k is r ig h t in f o c u s in g h is v is io n o f th e fu tu r e a r o u n d s c ie n t i f i c q u e s tio n s ; q u e s tio n s w h ic h w e n o w fa c e . E s ta b lis h in g lim it s re g a r d in g th e r e la tio n s h ip o f w h a t "c a n b e " a n d w h a t " s h o u ld b e " w i l l b e t h e b ig g e s t c h a lle n g e f o r h u m a n s t o o v e r c o m e in th e f u t u r e . W h ile O r w e ll's n o v e l is a h a u n t in g ly a c c u ra te p o rtr a y a l o f c o n te m p o r a r y p o lit ic a l life , th e g r o w in g fo r c e o f g lo b a liz a t io n a n d s u b s e q u e n t d e te r io r a tio n o f im p o r ta n c e p la c e d u p o n n a tio n a l lin e s m a k e s th e issues s u r r o u n d in g p o lit ic s less im p o r t a n t th a n th o s e s u r r o u n d in g s c ie n c e . U lt im a t e ly , it w i l l b e s c ie n c e , a n d o u r u n d e r s ta n d in g o f it, w h ic h w i l l d e te r m in e w h e th e r 2 0 0 1 a n d b e y o n d w i l l b e an O d y s s e y w o r th ta k in g .

t h e

McGILL TRIBUNE

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John Salloum A ssistant Ed ito r - in -C hief

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Jonathan Colford

News Editor

Shehryar Fazli Assistant News Editors

Mike Bargav Nema Etheridge

"T h e S t e a k s "

t o t h e e d it o r

Richard Retyi Ex-counsellor, Ex-editor

http://tribune.m cgill.ca L a s t poll: If you could receive any of the following holiday gifts, which would it be?

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James Empringham Neil Schnurbach

While I am ususally impressed with the Tribune’s coverage o f campus events, I was extremely dissapointed [sic] when the film “The Steaks” was nowhere to be seen in your paper. This was a movie shot entirely at M cG ill, by M cGill students, for M cGill students, and based around the lives o f M cGill students. It premiered on November 31st at Adams auditorium to an audience o f around 4 0 0 M cG ill students. “The S te ak s” was enthusiastically received by the audience that viewed it, and the creators o f that film (m yself included) hoped that coverage in the campus newspaper would yield further recognition, and possible hopes for future show ings o f the film. An associate editor o f the Tribune per sonally promised me that the paper would send some one to cover the premiere. Despite all this it did not receive a single mention in the last issue o f your paper. The T ribune should be the first forum where M cG ill student’s [sic] efforts are to be recognized, as it is the best venue to inform the student population of what is happening on campus. All too often people complain that M cGill has no student spirit, and when they see their efforts go unrecognized it hurts their hopes. Your jo b is to inform people about those events, and a failu re to do so only prom otes the sense o f m alaise among the student population. As a M cG ill newspaper it is your jo b to report on campus events before going to other sources for your news. Instead of coverage o f this campus event, there appeared a two page interview with W ide M outh M ason, a m ovie review o f “The Grinch”, and a review for a play at the Centaur theatre. While these are all extremely interest ing they should not be included in the paper at the expense o f campus news. In the future I hope that the Tribune will adhere to the standards o f a campus newspaper and put M cGill events in its paper. David Sax U2, History

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Letters must include author's name, signature, identification (e.g. U2 Biology, SSMU President) and telephone number and be typed double-spaced, submitted on disk in Macintosh or IBM word processor format, or sent by e-mail. Letters more than 200 words, pieces for Stop the Press more than :k ~ vords, or submis sions judged by the Editor-in-Chief to be libellous, sexist, racist, homophobic, or soley promotional in nature, w ill not be published. The Tribune w ill make all rea sonable efforts to print submissions provided that space is available, and reserves the right to edit letters for length. Bring submissions to the Tribune office, FAX to 398-1750 or send to tribune@>ssmu.mcgill.ca. Columns appearing under 'Editorial' heading are decided upon by the editorial board and written by a member of the editorial board. All other opinions are strictly those of the author and do nol necessarily reflect the opinions of The M cGill Tribune, its editors or its staff. Please recycle this newspaper. Subscriptions are available for $30.00 per year. A d vertisin g O ffic e : Paul Slachta, 36 00 rue M cTavish , Suite 1200, M ontréal, Québec H 3A 1Y2 Tel: (514) 398-6806 Fax: (514) 398-7490

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O p / E d Page 7

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

A graduating communiqué to MARS: thank you Open L e t t e r Am y L a n g s ta ff To: M A RS From: Amy Langstaff Subject: Enlightenment Dear M A R S: T h is is a d iffic u lt le tte r to w rite, but 1 know that I cannot leave you without offering some formal farewell. 1 do this as much fo r m y self as fo r you. I hav en’t written before because it was not until we last spoke (just moments ago, in fa c t) that I knew it was necessary for me to write. Now I know, M A R S, now I know. M A R S , I w ill not sully this final communiqué with falsehood and empty fla tte ry : I adm it that often have I heard others speak ill o f you . In d e e d , on so m e d ark n ig h ts in som e c o ld te le p h o n e

booths, I too have cursed you. I too have implored the heavens to s m ite y o u , th a t you m ig h t be replaced with some more sophisti cated and user-friendly online sys tem. I too have pressed the Pound key too fo rcefu lly , know ing this physical lashing out would do no good, that you would only insist that I was having trou b le using you and disconnect, but doing it anyw ay becau se I hoped that in some way I could H U RT Y O U that I could send the force o f that key-punch zipping and crackling through the city’ s fibre optic veins until it leapt out on the other end, strik in g you. I have d ro o lin g ly im agined you (upon being thus struck) crying out with shock and with pain, finally deviating from your m ad d ening s c rip t fo r ju s t long enough to acknowledge that you had hurt me too. But all that is behind me now, M A R S . As you and I enter into our final dance o f registration, I am empty o f rage, o f resentment, o f ill w ill. I find m y s e lf read y, stra n g e ly , to c o u n te n a n ce your

im p ish n ess, your c a p ric e , your inscrutability, even your m alevo le n c e . D o n o t th in k I b e lie v e m yself broken — no, the sense of defeat and disillusionment that has settled on so many o f my peers like a fine but deadly soot cannot count me among its fre sh -fa ced v ic tim s . T h e rea so n that I find m yself able to approach you with this new imperturbability is that I have fin ally com e to understand y ou r p la c e in the s c h e m e o f a M cG ill education. I have come to know what you have known for so long (I puzzled ov er your arro gance fo r years b efo re learn ing ju st how justified it was): that you are not m erely another o b sta cle th row n in th e path o f e a rn e s t, innocent, hopeful students; you are the whole point. O h, I know th e y w o u ld n ’ t ad m it it. A nd n o r, o f c o u rs e , would you. ( “You have made an in correct entry,” I hear you say. “ R e m e m b e r to c o m p le te e a ch e n try by p re s s in g th e nu m ber sign.” Your emphases fall strange ly ; you m asterfully conceal your

re m o te , and o n ly a p h o n e c a ll mechanical secrets.) They send out a w ay . F in d in g you anew e a ch their letters o f acceptance, inviting sem ester is like being confronted credulous youngsters near and far with the silence o f God. You have to experience a first-class educa hum bled m e; you have defeated tion (yes, first-class - M aclean ’ s me; you have hung up on me; you be damned) in the classroom s o f may yet kill me. But in the mean their venerable institu tion, m en time, you let me go my way. And tioning only in som e peripheral without you, I would be excised nuts-and-bolts instructional pam from the matrix altogether. Where phlet that in order to gain access to and what would I be i f I did not the aforementioned venerable and know you, if were not known by firs t-c la s s good ies, we m ust, by you? I shudder to think. the way, negotiate a certain tele I don’t suppose many people phonic gauntlet that goes by an stop to thank you, M A R S. I don’t acronym more sophisticated than suppose many people know why its own m echanism s. Ju st a tool for registration, they claim. Just a j they should. Even now, knowing what I know, I feel a little foolish few buttons to press en route to (som etim es prayer, too, makes us untold erudition. self-conscious). But I know I must H A ! T o th in k I co u ld e v e r do this. I know that my ability to have been so foolish as to believe! do this and my humble apprehen I have at last undone their little sion o f the need fo r this are the je u . I have fin a lly seen through only reasons I am fit to graduate their farrago o f trickery and deceit. from M cG ill U n iv ersity . Thank M A R S, you are my M cG ill educa you, M A R S. I see. I see. I see. tion. My classes have been mere fo ils to your in d o m ita b le M A R Sness. You are a Zen koan. #, Amy Langstaff You are perfect, brutal, incompre hensible nature. You are infinitely

Corporate imperialism shining into your bedroom Depraved Indifference

D ii n c a n R e i d F

or the many o f us who left M ontreal fo r the holidays, we are all welcomed back to the city by one thing (alright, two if you count the Quebec winter): the P la c e V ille M a rie b e a c o n . More than 4 0 floors up on top o f what is quite possibly M ontreal’ s most important building, the wel come mat is laid out for each and every one o f us. A s an u n d e rg ra d , I w as a prime example o f the last-minute student. M y mantra, com e exam p eriod , w as alw ays “th e re ’ s no c o u rs e you c a n ’ t do in fiv e d a y s ....” And it worked m ost o f the time - with a few spectacular exceptions - but it didn’t leave me re ta in in g very m uch o f w hat I “learned”. Even ju st a few years later, the vast m ajority o f what I recall is only what interested me.

One exam ple o f this type o f retention was on the construction o f Place V ille M arie, as taught in th e G e o g ra p h y c o u rs e “ T h e Canadian City” . Place V ille Marie was designed in the 1 9 6 0 ’ s as a massive project undertaken by an American developer that virtually se t a b o u t to m o v e th e c o r e o f M o n tre a l’ s dow ntow n from the area around the old port to the northwest, where it is today. This in v o lv e d the re o rg a n iz a tio n o f transportation links, and the cre ation o f a building on an altogether la rg e r s c a le th an had b ee n the norm in Montreal to that point. The d eveloper, w hose name my fo g g y m em ory o ffe rs up as Zeckendorf, was engaged in a bat tle for supremacy with the devel opers o f the C IB C building (just to the w est, on P e e l). H eight was k e y to w in n in g th a t b a ttle -

Z eckend orf secretly had plans to m ake P V M ta ller than had been in d icated , to ensure that he had ju st the slimmest o f altitude mar gins over the C IB C . And he was s u c c e s s fu l. B u t th a t w a s n ’ t enough: he thought that Montreal needed a crowning jew el to mark its civic importance, and hence the final flourish o f the searchlights. I ’ ve alw ays been fascin ated by PV M . I find it architecturally stunning - but I know that people look at me strangely when I say th at. T o m e, it is the h eig h t o f sleek but yet enduring modernism, j fro m the airy sy m m etry o f the lobby to the shiny aluminum cov e rin g . B u t th e b e a c o n , and its in e s c a p a b le s y m b o lis m , is the most interesting feature o f PVM . At first, the beacon annoyed me: the co n sta n t rev o lv in g (as seen from my 6th flo o r so u th -fa cin g sp ot in re z ) seem ed tirin g and unnecessary. Its rhythm was dis tra ctin g and p erv a siv e, lik e the Indigo Girls tunes that my neigh | b ou r ju s t c o u ld n ’ t seem to get

enough of. But now, I know better. On the face o f it, the beacon seems to be a politically incorrect sy m b o l: a d isp lay o f co rp o rate im p e ria lism . T h e lig h ts can be interpreted as establishing domin io n o v e r a b ro ad a re a , g o in g j beyond what even M ayor Bourque m ig h t c o n s id e r p art o f the M ontreal region. (O ne friend o f mine claims to have seen it almost | im m e d ia te ly a fte r c ro ss in g the V e rm o n t-Q u e b e c b o rd e r, but although I ’ ve tried I ca n ’t see it from quite T H A T fa r.) From a | building that has the Royal B ank’s name em blazoned over the front door, the surveying beam seems pretty c le a r in its intent. It is a sy m b o l o f p o w e r, p e rh ap s n ot unlike the cross looking out over East Montreal. But like the cross, the PVM lig h ts have taken on m ore o f a c iv ic c o n n e ctio n than anything else. Montrealers do not, I believe, see the lights as a power symbol; it is more like a symbol o f commu nity. It is the m ark o f a central

place, and the expression o f a uni fying force in the city. And that is w hy m any - i f a sk ed - m ig h t respond warmly to the beacon. I know that many times I have been drivin g b ack from w eekend s in Ontario and the U .S., feeling blah about the prospect o f returning to Q uebec because o f a rem arkable feeling o f disconnectedness with the province and its politics, only to have my enthusiasm rejuvenat ed by the revolv ing light rep re senting the promise o f M ontreal. It’s rhythm doesn’t grate; it repre sents the pulsating life o f the city. And that is why now, rather than being annoyed with the bea con, I enjoy it as it welcomes me home or reminds me o f why I like being in Montreal. Underneath it, I know, is all the fun and interest of the city. Happy New Y e a r, and w el come back.

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113

Wednesday, January 10 • 4:00pm - 9 :0 0 pm Shatner cafeteria & ballroom .

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

Page 8 O p / E d U t

Slightly lacking this week to make room for advertisements

Crossword No Recipe this week, since the ever-lovely recipe girls seem to have forgotten their responsibilities over the holidays. Luckily for them, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re off the hook since we need room for the Ads.

By Gooblar Across 1. T h e ir fifth alb u m w as Document 4. M otif 9. Partner o f turvy 14. Usually followed by "carte" 15. Propelled a canoe 16. Seed, tastes like licorice 17. Noise 18. Patchwork 19. Last name o f baking 20. Spring break spot 22. Cratered satellite 23. Shampoo directive 24. Its capital is St. Georges 27. Put o ff an execution 28. Code name 31. Chew on this 32. Quebec's favorite daughter 34. Director Forman 36. Famous bassist 39. Two-legged creature 40. Thorny plants 41. It's tapped 42. What Americans have trouble doing 43. Found in urine 47. Out o f the ordinary 50. Squeezed, to drain 51. Excited 52. The air 55. Foaming at the mouth 57. Dog noise

58. 59. 60. 61. 62. 63. 64.

Emerged victorious Estate Just below the roof Combine Statement o f belief "Whatever you say" Parliamentary assent

Down 1. Detection devices 2. Get a response 3. Tomorrow, in M exico 4. A hat, in Montreal 5. Lug 6. Monty Python's Idle 7. M eli-____ ; snack mix 8. Tim ezone, between Apr. and Oct. 9. California lake 10. Underground bulb 11. Zenith 12. Dir. 13. Regular person assent 21. Hitchcock classic 22. A wife, abbv. 24. Irish language 25. Partners 26. Billboards 28. One Swiss mountain? 29. Responsible 30. Get used to 33. Stop 34. Mainstream, abbv.

35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 42. 44. 45. 46. 48. 49. 50. 52. 53. 54. 55. 56. 57.

B ack up with money Leave at the altar Able to be done Fly away Low, in France Ovum . Model workplace Disguise Plan o f attack Fit Negative response to a father "Alt-country" band It means your against Actor Damon Hailing from Manchester Rez. Ambience Down

Holiday Crossword Answers

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T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2 0 0 1

Absinthe minded B a u d e la ire a n d V an G o g h d ra n k it, w ill y o u ? By X .M . M

il t o n

“After the first glass, you see things as you wish they w ere; a fte r the secon d, you s ee things as they are not; fin ally you see things as they really are, and that is the most horri ble thing in the world. ” —O scar Wilde If lounging at the Savoy or networking at the Alphabet bar, absinthe will probably play a leading role in an evening’s denoue m en t. G reen B o h e m ia , a group o f fo u r B ritish entrepreneurs, is single-hand edly responsible for the massive absinthe surge in B ritain ’s nightlife. “People are enjoying it because it’s a different experience o f plea su re,” says G reen B oh em ia partner, Tom Hodgkinson. E v e r s in c e la st y e a r ’ s “ m illen n iu m craze,” absinthe has experienced a discreet but lasting resurrection in several countries including Canada. Though a diluted version is available in Canada, many are still willing to take the risk o f importing the real thing. However, do these risk-takers know exactly what they are ordering, and if the absinthe nouveau is anything like it used to be? Absinthe, commonly referred to as the fee verte (green faeri), is a unique mixture o f 55 per cent to 75 per cent alcohol and a blend o f herbs. The em erald-green liquid is dis tilled with extracts o f anise, fennel, hyssop, cam o m ile, and the infam ous wormwood. W ormwood, which contains the psychoac tive thujone, is the hallucinogen that has given absinthe its legendary and enigm atic history. T h e o r ig in a l re c ip e w as S w is s , but France’s own Henri-Louis Pernod first sold it c o m m e rc ia lly in 1 7 9 7 ; S p a in and Czechoslovakia followed suit shortly there after. A glass o f le p eril vert was served for as little as three cents, and quickly became a staple am ongst bohem ians and the low er class alike. Famed writers and artist such as H enri de T o u lo u s e -L a u tr e c , C h a rle s B a u d e la ir e , V in c e n t V an G o g h , E rn e s t

H e m in g w a y , and P a b lo P ic a s s o are renow ned absinthe drinkers. In fa c t, the famous Dutchman is often said to have sev ered his ear in a fit o f absinthe-induced delir ium. The absinthe consumed during the mid nineteenth century fluctuat ed in quality and potency, but consumption during la b elle ép oqu e still managed to exceed forty million liters per year. Copper was often added to enhance the emer a ld -g ree n e ffe c t, and the thujone content was signifi c a n tly g re a te r than it is today (260 parts per million rather than 10 parts per mil lion). Absinthe drinkers suf fered irreparable side effects such as convulsion, blind ness, kidney failure, epilep sy , and e v e n tu a l d eath , w hich lead to the c lin ica l term know n as absenthetism. In fact, half of F ra n ce’ s in fa m o u s Charenton asylum was sup posedly housed by absinthetipplers. A b sin th e ’ s d etractors b la m e d it fo r in c re a s in g d eg e n e ra cy , p ro stitu tio n , and child abuse. Absinthe’ s not so d is c re e t ta k e o v e r forced its banishment from B e lg iu m , S w itz e rla n d ,

Canada (u ntil very r e c e n tly ), and F ra n ce, betw eett 1905 and 1915 (it is still legal and pro duced in Spain and C z e c h o s l o v a k ia ) . Some claim that the only reason France ban n ed the ja d e e lix ir is b ecau se it threatened F ran ce’ s ab ility to conscript its you ng m en. Other than its peri odic appearance in sp eak easies during prohibition, absinthe q u ie tly fo llo w e d B rita in ’ s laudanum in to the fo rg o tte n vices o f the past. T h e fo u r cu n ning entrepreneurs b eh in d G reen Bohemia are the dri v in g fo r c e b eh in d the resu rrectio n o f absinthe in B ritain. T h e y re a liz e d that the fe e v e rte was n e v e r ban n ed in Britain and capital ized on its legendary h is to ry . B r i t a in ’ s absinthe “loophole” drew a su rp risin g am o u n t o f m ed ia attention that lead to a trendy explosion in London’s Soho sec tio n . H o d g k in so n e m p h a siz e s th at, “there’s a whole generation not taking drugs, not clubbing, and they still want to experi ence something different. This fits quite well because it’ s not rave-y, it’s chatty and fun.” B y “chatty” Mr. Hodgkinson is referring to its history, by “fun” he is referring to its ritualistic preparation. The Czechoslovakian method prepares absinthe by holding a perfo rated spoon on top o f a tall glass. A sugar cube is placed on the spoon and one part absinthe is poured over the sugar cube and into the glass. The sugar cube is ignited and five parts o f water are added once the sugar cube has caram elized. T he em erald-green liquid transforms into a milky white (called “louche”) because the essential oils precipi tate out o f the alcoholic solution. Stir the m ixture and voilà — you have a perfectly prepared glass o f absinthe. Unfortunately, the B rit’ s are imbibing an absinthe placebo. The absinthe distrib uted in B r ita in by G re e n B o h e m ia is a C z e c h o s lo v a k ia n b ran d c a lle d H i ll ’ s Absinthe. I procured a bottle o f the Listerinelike substance in London over the summer. At an exorbitant £ 4 0 (S85CDN) and fluores cent green, it’s potent swill. The same bottle bought in Prague costs 300 crowns, or nine Canadian dollars. M ixing H ill’s with water has no effect whatsoever because it lacks the essential herbs. Curiously, Hill’s Absinthe is also the same brand that will be made availabe this spring in Canada (only by special order o f 12 bottles for $ 9 6 0 !!!). Suffice it to say, it is not enjoyable but at 140 proof (70 per cent) it’ s simply one o f the quickest rides into oblivion!

One o f my roommates got several bot tle s o f ab sin th e fro m Sp ain c a lle d M ari Mayan. At a reasonable 16Euros ($25CDN), Mari Mayan is the green faeri in its true form (with the E.U. regulation o f 10 parts per mil lion o f thujone). U nlike H ill’ s A bsinthe, Mari Mayan undergoes the louche process when prepared properly and tastes surpris ingly pleasant. Even though it is also 70 per cent alcohol, its herbal content makes it quite palatable. A fter a few late night glasses a clo se friend said, “i t ’ s strong but a good drink to have before the going to the bars.” Today’s absinthe should not be ingested fo r any h allu cin o g en ic “trip .” In fa c t, it should be consumed responsibly because it can easily hospitalize any pretentious “harddrinker,” and it will blind you if you abuse it habitually. It should be taken for its herbal flavour, which is not unlike Ouzo. H ill’s Absinthe certainly is not provid ing trend-getters with a vicarious trip into Van Gogh or Hemingway’ s world; it will not inspire you to write or paint. Absinthe does, however, offer anyone who enjoys liquors with an exotic drink that speaks more vol umes than any rum-and-coke ever could, and an experience that your taste-buds will never forget!

A b s i n t h e C o c k t a i l s

CORPSE REVIVER • ounce lemon juice • ounce Lillet (apéritif) • ounce Cointreau • ounce gin • 1 dash absinthe (Pernod is recopies where absinthe is not available) • Put all ingredients in a shaker and shake vigorously. Strain into a cocktail glass.

EARTHQUAKE COCKTAIL (Favored by H enri Toulouse-Lautrec) • 1 ounce cognac • 1 ounce absinthe

A B SI N T H E RELATED WEBSITES (not authoritative sources) httn://itsa.ucsf.edu/~mhaeg/roughabsinthefaq.html

http://www.seDulchritude.com/ehapelperilous/absinthe/fQm m faq.html

CAMPUS

RECREATIO N

INTRAMURAL SPORTS SPORT

CATEGORY

WHEN TO REGISTER

COST

NUMBER OF PLAYERS

CAPTAINS’ MEETING

• P le a s e n o te th a t reg is tratio n d eadlines are s tric tly en forced. • S p a c e in m o st sp orts is lim ited REGISTER EARLY!

LOCATION

GAME DAYS

TO REGISTER MAXIMUM Draw posted Campus Rec Office - Mar. 8, 17:00 hrs.

Saturday & Sunday Mar. 10-11

Gymnasium 3 &4

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Monday, Tuesday Saturday, Sunday

Fieldhouse A&B

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Monday, Wednesday Thursday, Friday Sunday

Gymnasium 1 &2

Men-10 Women -10 Co-rec 5 Men & 5 Women

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Monday to Friday, Saturday & Sunday

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

7 Men & 5 Women

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Sunday

Currie Pool

$85.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

10 Co-rec 5 Men & 5 Women

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Monday to Thursday, Saturday & Sunday

Fieldhouse C&D

OPEN

$15.00 per player

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Mar. 7,17:00

N/A

Draw posted Campus Rec Office - Mar. 8, 17:00 hrs.

Saturday & Sunday Mar. 10-11

Webster Courts

TABLE TENNIS (Tournament)

MEN WOMEN

$15.00 per player

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Feb. 7,17:00

N/A

Draw posted Campus Rec Office - Feb. 8, 17:00 hrs.

Saturday and Sunday Feb. 10- 11

Squash Courts 3,4 & 5

VOLLEYBALL

MEN WOMEN

$85.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Monday, Sunday

Gymnasium 3 &4

VOLLEYBALL

CO-REC A & B

$85.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

5 Men & 5 Women

Jan. 9,18:30 hrs. Fieldhouse

Wednesday, Thursday

Fieldhouse A&B

VOLLEYBALL

CO-REC

$30.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Mar. 23,17:00

2 Men & 2 Women

Draw posted Campus Rec Office - Mar. 24, 17:00 hrs.

Saturday

Fieldhouse A&B

BADMINTON (Tournament)

MEN A & B WOMEN

$15.00 per player

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Mar. 7,17:00

N/A

BALL HOCKEY

MEN A & B WOMEN

$85.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

BASKETBALL

MEN A & B WOMEN

$85.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

BROOMBALL

MEN WOMEN CO-REC

$150.00 per team

Dec. 4, 09:00 to Jan. 9,17:00

INNERTUBE WATERPOLO

CO-REC

$85.00 per team

INDOOR SOCCER

MEN A & B WOMEN CO-REC

SQUASH (Tournament)

(4 on 4 Tournament)

Molson Stadium Rink

It o n ly takes a few minutes to get f i t . . . P A Y -A S -Y O U -G O FITNESS CLASSES START JANUARY 3 .

STEP TAE BOX AEROBICS SPIN

Mon. sc Wed.

1 7 :0 0 - 1 7 :5 5

Dance Studio

Tues. SC Thrus.

1 7 :0 0 - 1 7 :5 5

Aerobics Room

Sat. sc Sun.

1 1 :0 0 - 1 1 :5 5

Aerobics Room

Friday

1 7 :0 0 - 1 7 :5 5

Dance Studio

Friday

1 8 :0 0 - 1 8 :4 5

Activity Room

P a y -A s-Y o u -G o

►

P O W ER

►

Y O G A

F R ID A Y S

COST STEP/TAE BOX/POWER YOGA/AEROBICS: $2.50 AT THE DOOR OR 1 TICKET

16:00- 16:55 1* i

A e r o b ic s

SPIN: $5.00 AT THE DOOR OR 2 TICKETS * Booklets of 10 tickets can be purchased for $20.00 purchased at the Client Service Office. Tickets go on sale in the Sports complex 15 minutes before classes start.

M c G ill ATHLETICS

F O R M A T I O N l: 3 9 8 - 7 0 1 11

ACTIVE LIVING DAY & TIME

COURSE

COST

WKS

40/85

40/60

40/60 40/60 40/60 135/160

8 8 8 8

R E G IS T R A T IO N IN F O R M A T IO N Registration in the Client Services Office of the Sports Centre - Monday through Friday 0 8 :3 0 -1 9 :4 5 . • Registration continues through Friday, February 2, 2 0 0 1 . • Non-members registered in courses may use the facility only during their designated class times. • Most classes begin the week of January 1 5 , 2 0 0 1 . • Full tim e McGill Students may register at the mem ber’s fee. • All prices include G.S.T. and Q.S.T.

COST

WKS

Wednesday Tues., Jan 30 & Wed., Jan. 31

20:00-22:00 19:00-20:00 17:00-17:30

25/30 25/30

2 2

Tuesday & Friday Mon\Wed\Fri Mon & Wed Mon & Wed Tuesday & Saturday Tues & Thurs Tues & Thurs Mon\Wed\Fri Mon & Wed Mon & Wed

18:00-19:55 17:00-19:55 16:30-17:55 17:30-19:30 19:30-21:25 20:15-22:10 09:00-10:55 14:00-15:25 15:30-16:55 15:00-16:25 20:30-21:30 21:30-22:30

87/132

78/123 70/115 70/115 70/115

10 10 10 10

52/97 78/123 52/97 35/80 35/80

10 10 10 10 10

Tues & Thurs Tues & Thurs Tuesday Thursday Friday Saturday by appointment by appointment Friday Friday Monday Wednesday Saturday Saturday by appointment by appointment Monday Monday Tuesday Tuesday Wednesday Wednesday Thursday Thursday Friday Friday Friday Friday Friday Saturday Sunday Monday Thursday Saturday Sunday by appointment by appointment Monday Tuesday Wednesday Friday Tues & Thurs Monday Wednesday Wednesday Friday Tues & Thurs Thursday Friday by appointment by appointment

08:00-08:55 20:00-20:55 17:00-17:55 18:00-18:55 16:00-16:55 11:00-11:55

45/85

30/45

20/23 25/32 50/70 50/70 40 45/65 36/56

1 1 8 8 11 8

17/20 24/30 25/40

1/2 hr 1/2 hr 6

25/40

18/21 25/32 32/47

1 1 6

64/94 32/47

6 6

64/94 32/47 32/47 20/23 25/32

6 6 6 1 1

25/30

90/95

73/78 90/110

1 8

90/110

90/110 42/47

8 1

DAY & TIME

I COURSE Aquae Ises Aqua Adult 1 (Beginner) Aqua Adult 2 (Intermediate) Aqua Adult 3 (Advanced) Aqua Quest 1 - 4 (3 -1 4 yrs) Aqua Quest 5 -1 2 (3 -14 yrs) Aqua Tots 1 to 3 Bronze Medallion Junior Resuscitation, Exam Fees and Manual Included) Bronze Cross Pre-requisite Bronze Medallion (Exam Fees Included) SCUBA Stroke Improvement Swim (Private & semi-private) Swim Fit (Cardio-Respiratory Endurance) Contemporary Dance Flamenco 1 Flamenco II Irish Dance Jazz Intro 1& II Jazz Inter II & III Latin Dance Social Dance Aerobics - Adv. High \ Low Aerobics - High \ Low Aerobics - Funky High \ Low Body Design

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McGill

Page 12

Features

T he M cG ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

Where have all the mushrooms gone? B y Sa r a h Et t e d g u i

Hmmm, nuclear w arfare... it’s not likely to be the hot topic at the party this weekend. In fact, when m ost students are ask ed i f they believe that nuclear warfare is still a threat, blank stares or shrugs are the responses. Dr. Jean Barrette, chair o f the p h y s ic s d ep artm en t at M c G ill, w hose personal research encom passes the physics behind nuclear w e ap o n s, w as e q u a lly p u zzled when solicited for information. “I d id n’ t know people w ere still interested in nuclear warfare,” he said. Looking beyond the classroom at g o v ern m e n ts and m ilita r ie s around the world, nuclear warfare isn’t having the same impact it did forty years ago. Consequently, should nuclear war still be considered a sociologi cal as well as political threat? Or should a tten tio n be e x c lu s iv e ly dedicated to the new guns in town, b io lo g ical and ch em ical w arfare which are both cheaper and easier to make? Over the years, Hiroshima and

Nagasaki have become symbols o f ou r c a p a b ility fo r c a ta s tro p h ic destruction. D espite rogue states such as Iraq and North Korea who refuse to acquiesce, the majority o f the world has recognized the need for the banning the use o f nuclear w eapons. T h e U nited S ta tes has recently given R ussia 2 0 m illion d ollars to be used in controlling and culling some o f their nuclear arsenal. Despite such examples o f positive cooperation, the nuclear threat still exists. T .V Paul, a M cG ill p olitical s c ie n c e p ro fe ss o r w ho has ju s t completed two books entitled, The A bsolute W eapon R ev isited and Power versus Prudence, agrees. “As long as you have nuclear warfare, there is the possibility o f it being used. And the most probable use will be inadvertent use.” Paul refers to the dangers o f poorly maintained silos, decaying or rusting weapons and an inade quate disposal o f old weapons that may s till be lying around under w a ter o r b u ried u n d erg ro u n d . M oreover, many o f the weapons are nearly half a century old. Thus, nuclear arsenals are far from state-

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This phenomenon is mostly due to what Barrette calls “a quiet time, where nuclear warfare is on a dif ferent basis — with different prin ciples, with people’s views chang ing from the Cold War era — there is a se n se o f m o ral b lo c k a g e towards it.” However, Kim Gordon, a U2 political science student at M cGill, feels that the media has cold-shoul dered nuclear warfare. “ S tu d e n ts la c k in te r e s t in nuclear warfare because the media makes it out to be something o f the p a s t, lik e a n c ie n t h is to ry . F o r instance you’ll see a small column com memorating the anniversaries o f the two atomic bomb droppings. [This] leads the reader to think that it is not that important,” she says. Gordon claim s that so ciety ’ s d ecreased apprehension towards the nuclear threat is based more in blissful ignorance rather than fact. Specifically, she feels that universi ty students lack an appreciation o f the power o f nuclear weapons, hav ing never seen the d irect co n se quences o f them. Perhaps there are simply other forms o f warfare to be more con

cerned with. Chemical and biologi cal weapons such as Sarin gas are e a s ie r and ch e a p e r to p rep are. Undoubtedly, uranium and plutoni um, the two essential components o f nuclear weapons, are rather dif ficult to obtain, though there is a black market. Such markets exist and prolif erate in unruly countries, such as Russia. With an unstable and cor rupt governm ent, and a m assive and ageing nuclear arsenal, Russia is ru m ored to be s e llin g its weapons to other countries. This leads to what Barrette refers to as “a big mess” where smaller, poorer countries obtain small amounts o f nuclear weaponry. The capabilities o f these countries are questionable, but considering that a single bomb could incite a war, any movement o f radioactive materials is cause for alarm. F o r tu n a te ly , non e o f th e se countries have caused serious dam age. However, that doesn’t mean that it’s outside the realm o f possi bility. Says B arrette,“how would to d a y ’ s s o c ie ty r e a c t to the announcement o f a nuclear war set to begin tomorrow?”

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of-the-art, making them that much more dangerous. “C an we really trust bom bs designed and tested half a century ago?” says Barrette. “Or worse yet, do you trust those bombs that are designed today without testing their ability to properly fu n ction ... but maybe we’re saved by that.” Unfortunately, many countries refuse to allocate sufficient funds towards their nuclear arsenals, cit ing that the near-certainty o f mutu ally assured destruction and better in te rn a tio n a l p o litic a l re la tio n s have red u ced the lik e lih o o d o f nuclear war. T he latter notion is key in Paul’s eyes for explaining the decrease in nuclear activity. “National politics and the way [foreign policies] are shaping them selves is moving towards a more friendly and peaceful approach,” he claims. U nlike during the Cold W ar, there are now ratified international te s t ban and n o n -p ro life ra tio n tr e a tie s . T h is has re su lte d in a dearth o f nuclear specialists. The brightest scientific minds have fol lowed the funding and have been steered away from nuclear physics.

C ontinued from Page 1 they could have their son back, it is n ’ t re a lly ‘rig h t’ to m ess with nature? Assume, further, that they don’t care, and they stealth away to a grimy back alley and pay blackm a rk et p ric e s to g e t th e ir son cloned illegally. Jim ’s clone resem bles Jim in every aspect physically. However, Jim 2 is withdrawn, unathletic and a kleptomaniac. Jim ’s parents become frustrated because th ey p aid fo r th e old Jim , and received a poor imitation. Not only are Jim ’s parents unhappy, but Jim 2 becom es disillusioned and maybe even psychopathic because o f a lack o f affectionate parents. Obviously, cloning presents some difficult ethi cal choices. Inevitably, there will be a sig nificant percentage o f the popula tion who will want to put as much distance between them and genetic engineering as possible. However, it is quite possible that eventually nobody will be immune from the repercussions. Take for example a requirem ent for DNA samples by

life and health insurance brokers.. O bv iou sly, an individual predis posed towards cancer or heart dis ea se, w hich im p lies lengthy and e x p e n s iv e tre a tm e n t, w ould be charged a m uch higher prem ium than so m e o n e p re d isp o se d to a healthy life. M oreover, employers may also discriminate against pre disposed individuals. After all, what employer would invest in training an em ployee, i f they are likely to get sick and be unproductive for the company? This kind o f discrimina tion can be looked upon as com pletely unfair as genetics is only one fa c to r in the e q u a tio n . As Mansfield points out, environmen tal factors and chance play large roles in governing people’ s e x is tences. As with any dilemma, the best defense is knowledge and dialogue. One way to better prepare the pub lic is to increase its awareness on the issu es. M a n sfie ld ’ s suggests three methods to combat ignorance. First he is targeting sources that are traditionally sought for advice such as p rie sts, ra b b is , te a ch e rs , and

counselors. Educating the bullhorns o f society is an efficient manner for e d u ca tin g the g e n e ra l p u b lic . Secondly, he is targeting members o f the media, which is often misin form ed. B y educating the m edia, many myths and un-founded fears held by the public can be alleviated. For example, Mansfield has worked with one o f the producers o f the television program, E .R , consulting on the scientific accuracy o f future episodes centered on genetic engi neering. I f the tw entieth century was epitomized by man’s struggle with nuclear annihilation, then all pre liminary indications suggest that the twenty-first will pit man against the powers o f the genome. No doubt the stakes are equally as high, and perhaps higher, as it is much easier to conceal a mutant than a mush room cloud. Mansfield and society in general, will have very difficult choices to make in the near future; making it even wiser to start pon dering the possibilities now.

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Features

T he M c G ill T ribu n e , T u esd a y , 9 Jan u ary 2001

Page 13

Ugly as Hell B y I a n S peigel

V ia a sophisticated network o f informants and intelligence agents, D igital Culture has recently pin pointed the earthly whereabouts o f the sultan o f sin. Yup, the lord o f the underworld has returned from a three or four hundred year sab batical (although we believe that he has, among other things, been

running diam onds and w eapons through Africa). Opting to stick with a proven winner, his E vilness has recently taken on the form o f d eliciou sly nubile blond, about 5 ’ 9 , 1251bs, who goes by the name o f Porsche (that’ s pronounced P or-sha). Her picture, as posted on her website, is rem iniscent o f m ost five-and dime porn stars - lots o f red, lots o f cu rls, and lip s so sw eet and pouty it looks like they were made f o r ...w e ll , you g et the p ictu re. This chick is lascivious, cunning, and h as re v e a le d a p e rso n a l vendetta against the less in te lli gent. She describes her pet peeve a s :" T h e la c k o f u n d ersta n d in g (prevalent in man), and the abun d an ce o f s tu p id ity " (le a d in g D ig ita l C u ltu re to su sp e ct that George W . Bush may be in grave danger.) "Oh shit!"you’re thinking - a transmundane war o f biblical pro portions is breaking out faster than a bad case o f acne. W ell, you’ve no one but y o u rse lf to blam e if nine years o f unprecedented global econom ic growth didn’t strike you as a little suspicious. W hat better time could there be for the Devil to make his move?

acquire pictures o f ‘U glies’ (those who are not endowed with external p h y sical beau ty) and post these pictures for all to see, organized into various categories like "ugly w o m en ", "u g ly m en" and "u gly couples". P re d ic ta b ly , hum an b ein g s h a v e p ro v e n to b e w eak and m o ra lly fr a il c re a tu re s as e v i denced by the skyrocketing popu-

tered. T h e D ev il q u ick ly re a liz e d th e s e tw o c a te g o r ie s w ere to o much, even for wife-beating, liver eating psychopaths. He understood th a t he w as lo o s in g c a r e fu lly mined footholds. It is now blatant that the Devil was m erely prodding the bound a rie s o f hum an m o r a lity . He learned that m aking fun o f kids

written, reads: "If you love some thing, let it go. I f it com es back to y o u , it w as m ean t to b e . I f it doesn’t, date her sister." O bviously the devil intended Trent to play the role o f moronic sex fiend whom wom en in stin c tively distrust, and eventually hate because they are ashamed o f the secret desire they harbor for him. And men hate T ren t becau se he

stolen a page out o f God’ s books, and it’s working quite well for the lord o f the underworld. The expo sure and popularity o f uglypeople.com has grown exponentially.

larity o f uglypeople.com.And even m ore frig h te n in g is that people actually take the tim e to vote on how ugly the ‘uglies’ really are. "O h rubbish. I'll w ager that the top vote-getting ‘u g lies’ win som e sort o f p rize - lik e p la tic surgery,” you might say. Sadly, the only prize these poor folk get is th e w arm fu z z y fe e lin g th a t accompanies international ridicule.

and the disabled is cou nter-p ro ductive so he sw itched to other tactics.

brags about shaving his legs. The record s o f uglypeople.com indi cate that Trent receives almost as much hate/death m ail as Porsche receives love mail. T h e second d em on-general, K y ro n e, is perhaps the D e v il’ s m ost cunning d ev ice - a perfect foil to Trent. He’s good-looking in a goofy, non-threatening kind o f way, but still exudes a slimy sexu ality, illustrated by his entry under the “ B est Known F or" category: "M y hips, my lips and agile little fingertips. M y sm ile my guile, I always go that extra mile." O s te n s ib ly , gu ys sco rn Kyrone, but guys also realize that he probably d oes w ell w ith the ladies, so a certain level o f respect is due. Ladies, still seething with hatred for Trent, cannot help but admit to a certain wistful attraction for Kyrone. This is evidenced by the three pieces o f love mail that Kyrone has received.

honored as "worst o f the web" and m anaged to achiev e a bronze in the "most useless site" competition as ju d g e d by www.uselessjunk.com. A pparently, and thankfully, these accolad es served to galva nize a hitherto com p lacen t God into respecting the gravity o f the situ atio n . W ith a n ifty on e-tw o c o m b o , god m an ag ed to g e t u g ly p e o p le .c o m m e n tio n e d in Cosm opolitan and also sparked a rumor that Porsche was engaging in sexual relatio n s with Rodney Dangerfield. T e m p o r a rily stu n n ed , the Devil countered by introducing an even m o re p e rn ic io u s uglypeople.com, highlighted by a new category entitled "ugly o f the day". This category invites every day people to submit pictures o f ‘u glies’ , spreading hate and pro moting mockery in com m unities, w orkplaces and between in-laws. This move appeared to be a signif icant blow against goodness, and God really hasn’t done anything to turn the tide against evil. In fact, a s id e fro m s n e a k in g an "u g ly celeb rity " category into the site, b a d n e ss has p ro p ag ated p retty m u ch u n fe tte re d . The u g ly p e o p le .co m o n lin e sto re is thriving, the site has been featured in sev eral m ore m agazines, and this past D ecember a local televi sion station ran a small feature on the site. So where does this leave us we with the souls for grabs? It’ s difficult to say as there are bound to b e so m e w in n e rs and so m e losers when his Goodness and his Badness mix it up. But kick me in the ass if the website ain’t funny as all hell. And say cheese.

T h e lin e is d ra w n . Ju st as the D evil has reared his ugly head in centuries yore, he is doing so now. And ju st as he beguiled the unscrupulous and the w eak in the p a st, so w ill he attem pt to do so now and in the very near fu tu re. B u t th is tim e there seem s to be unprecedented organization and deception in his sc h e m e . It is as though he has finally learned from his past m is takes - from being avaricious and unsustainably evil. He has grown methodic and cleverer. For example, the original ver sio n s o f u g ly p eo p le.co m show

A n d m o ve he d id . S o m e tim e la s t M a r c h , his W ickedness, guised as the d elec table Porsche, and accompanied by tw o d em on -gen erals (T ren t and Kyrone), casually waded into the waning stream o f venture-capital ist funding, and started up a web site. They called this site, uglypeople.com. W hat e x a ctly o ccu rs w ithin cyber confines o f uglypeople.com d o m a in ? Q u ite s im p ly , th ey

T h e d e m o n -g e n e ra ls .

cased two particu larly offen siv e and d e v ilis h c a te g o r ie s , "u g ly retards" and "ugly kids". In fact, you could almost hear God laugh ing when the site first cam e out. ‘Still an idiot!’ he must have mut-

T h e D evil thought long and hard before assuming the form o f P o rsc h e , and it is c le a r that he devoted equal thought in devising ‘T re n t’ and ‘ K y ro n e’ . T og eth er, Porsche, Trent and Kyrone main tain and run the site, deal with love and hate mail, judge "uglies" sub m is s io n s , and c o n tr iv e . M o re importantly, however, the unholy trium verate exu des a beacon o f choking arrogance and unabashed sex u a lity w hich snakes its way into the pride and libidos o f men and women. W e cannot resist. Trent’s photo is remniscent of a brown-haired Fabio. His biogra phy is posted on the site and we are informed that Trent’s favourite saying is: "T o all the women who have screwed guys arou nd ...I am man’s revenge." His philosophy on life , as is

Ju st as there is strength and harmony amongst the holy trinity (b a s e d on C h r is tia n d o c trin e ) there is also malicious potency in th is th r e e s o m e . T h e D e v il has

H ello ...G o d? A mere four w eeks after its in ce p tio n , u g ly p e o p le .co m was

Tm.

9 J anuary 2 0 0 1

Eve Sux G o b , T r e b le C h a rg e r, a n d Eve 6 p la y t o t h e c ro w d a t C lu b S o d a

B y K eith Su t h e r l a n d

L et me first d isab u se the reading public o f the assumption that this article will be reviewing 3 b an d s, n am ely G o b , T re b le Charger, and Eve 6. See, I arrived (very) fashionably late to the show at Club Soda - as is my way - only to find to my dismay that the open ing bands were already finished and there was only one set left. Normally, friends, this would not be a problem, except for the fact that E ve 6 was the band left to play. Enter my journalistic bias. It is my oh-so-expert opin ion that both G ob and T reb le Charger are both much more tal ented, cre a tiv e , and a rtistica lly independent than Eve 6. So what on earth caused fate’ s cruel hand

to move the concert promoters to give Eve 6 the closing spot eludes me. I mean, come on, just to make it to the closing act, Eve 6 ’ s fanbase o f 16 year old girls and hor mone happy boys had to be up way past their bedtime. It just doesn’t make sense. Nonetheless, Eve 6 is what we got. For those o f you who aren’t in tune with your inner angst-ridden youth, or have not been exposed to any major media outlets lately, Eve 6 is a crew o f 4 power-pop wield ing dudes fro m S o u th e rn California. Their whole ethos can be explained by the fact that they are one o f those bands with a num ber in their name, e.g. B link 182, Sum 4 1 , S R - 7 1 , e tc . T h e lead vocalist is basically a singing jo ck . He re a lly lik e s to ju m p up and down in a Jesus Christ pose while he sings, and damn, is he ever hot. I ’m pretty sure half the crowd only showed up to see this guy strut his stuff and say things like “Are you fe e lin g the ro c k po w er y et Montreal?!” No, seriously. He said

that, and people didn’t even laugh. In fact, the small crowd really was feeling the rock power. They jum ped around and crowd surfed and generally rocked out fo r the whole set, until the band admitted that they were out o f songs and had to c o v e r th e B e a t le s and Jo h n Denver. Eve 6 managed to keep its momentum going by spacing out the hit songs (such as the recent single “Prom ise” from their latest release, H orrorscope). The ChristJo c k singer really likes to infuse his songs with a little pseudo-intel lectu al pretentiou sness to try to give them som e cred ib ility , like using expressions such as “beauti ful o b liv io n ” , “co n g ru en t” , and “la c k th e re o f” to in sin u ate that there’s some real teen angst going on here. Beautiful Oblivion. Whoa, man. I mean, whoa. The thing is that I bet m ost o f the fans who showed up couldn’t spell “th ereof’ or “congruent” ... maybe there’s an educational appeal here that ju st eludes me. O verall, I ’ d have to say that

those who showed got what they wanted - a solid evening o f sugarcoated punk delivered by a hunkahunka-jock lead vocalist. For my money though, the best part o f the show w as the tw o m id d le aged guys at the back whose preferred method o f cutting loose was a fas c in a tin g co m b in a tio n of R iv e r d a n c e and an e p ile p tic s e iz u re . I ’ m te llin g you , th o se h u m an -n atu re show s on the D iscovery Channel couldn’t even begin to explain what these masters o f interpretive dance were up to, and folks, that is entertainment.

Crouching Tiger's greatness hidden by a bad mean tiger Film's e n d e a v o u r to be o rig in a l d e fe a te d by g e n re -m u d d lin g an d John W ayn e era d é jà vu By M

ike

Ba r c a v

C ro u ch in g D rag o n H idden T iger, Hidden Dragon Crouching T ig e r , F ly in g D rag o n R o a rin g Tiger...w hatever. Running through permutations ad nauseum is going to do very little to change the fact that the title m ade little sen se b efo re the m ovie and even less after it. Ang L ee, renowned with his past endeavors for a pompous politico-cinematographic voice, has churned out this much ballyhooed ‘e p ic ’ that does not w arrant its recent acclaim . Sad ly enough, a spectacular musical score, featuring among others Y o Y o Ma, a produc tion budget digging into bottomless c o ffe rs and veteran actors don’ t manage to save the film. The story begins with the deci sion o f legendary sword master Li Mu Bai (Chow Yun Fat) to place his proverbial Excalibur, the Green Destiny, in the safe keeping o f Yu Shu Lien (M ichelle Yeoh) and quit the game for a quieter life. But low and behold, keeping with a cliché that was overdone 25 years ago, ju st when he tries to get out, they pull him right back in. The Green D estin y is stolen by the sw ash buckling kung fu warrior princess Jen (Zhang Ziyi) and her mentor, B a i’s arch-rival, the Jade Fox, forc ing B a i to re c la im it from ev il hands. Bai sees an underdeveloped potential in Jen, and furtively fights to legitim ately pass on the Green Destiny to her. The crux o f the plot

is the unrequited love between Bai and Lien, and between Jen and Lo Chang Chen, a Mongolian bandit.

heaped on Crouching Tiger. T h e b e s t w ay to d e s c rib e Crouching Tiger is under the broad

e p ic . T h e fig h t se q u e n c e s are am ong the m o st p u n c tilio u s ly orchestrated eye candy I ’ve even

hue. Unfortunately though, this was already used in an earlier Chinese release this year, Shower. I fin d it re a lly hard to buy the whole tragedy o f ‘unrequited lo v e ’ blah blah blah when the fu n ctio n al th e m a tic is the ‘my life is to o harsh fo r l o v e ,’ Jo h n W ayn e bullshit. Besides, this role is one that Fat has centered his career on, going back as far as a d ecad e to K ille r s . W atching any one o f these offers more than fair recourse into the outcome o f Crouching T ig er. T h e m ost im p ortan t d em a rca tion betw een vanilla and avant garde is a sprinkle o f originality, w h ich C r o u c h in g T ig e r la c k s . Cinematically splicing Enter the Dragon and

T he L a s t E m p e r o r

Beware the wrath o f the Green Destiny... Jen gives Yu Shu Lien (pictured above) a run for her money. The tapestry o f characters interwo ven by a shared desire for a simpler and easier life precluded by the harshness o f rea lity and chance lends the epic a dynastic quality — the same quality which has been at the root o f much o f the a ccla im

label o f a m ulti-genre synthesis, combining elements o f martial arts film m aking, and h istorical epic drama. The only problem is that it has far too m uch dram a to be a legitim ate action picture, and far too little drama to be a legitimate

seen but are used in an extremely distracting and gratuitous manner. Som e in te restin g steps in c in e m atography are m arked by cuts fro m d ark sh o ts tin g e d w ith a bluish hue, to bright shots o f the G obi desert tinged with a yellow

sounds interesting at fa c e v a lu e , but th is on ly tra n s la te s to a laudable film if if the tw o g en res can be le g itim a te ly interwoven. C rouching T iger too often plays as two separate films, each distracting from its corollary and driving toward an end product o f uninspired visual wizardry.

Entertainment

T he M c G ill T r ibu n e , T u esd a y , 9 J anu ary 2001

Page 15

M ore Self-Conscious Crap In Which I've W ritten About a Subject About Which I Know Very Little or Even Nothing1 New Skin for the Old Cerem ony C h ris

Essert

t the end o f the sum m er, my parents moved to New Y o rk C ity 2 so I got to go down there to hang out for a couple o f weeks over Christmas break. For an Arts columnist, what else could this mean but a veritable orgy o f gallery-going and music-hearing? One day, strolling through the M oM A3, I said to my sister, halfserious and half-just-trying-to-bec o n fro n ta tio n a l-b e c a u s e -th a t’ sh o w -I-a ct-to w a rd s-h e r-b eca u seshe’s-my-little-sister-and-how-else-

would-I-act-?, that as far as I was c o n c e rn e d , the o n ly th in g th at makes art4 good v. bad is whether or not I personally find it aestheti cally pleasing. To put it into con crete terms, the only art that’s good is art that I would hang on my wall. T h e only thing is, I fe e l sort o f guilty about this position, like it’s something that only an idiot could believe, and I don’t usually think o f m yself as an idiot. B ack in Montreal, I sit at my computer wondering what to write my dam n co lu m n a b o u t and I decide that together, loyal readers, you and I will work this issue out. What issue, you ask? Pay attention, I answ er: I know my w riting is hard to understand at the best o f

' As Usual.

2Actually, they moved to a city called Rye in Westchester County, which is about 30 mins from the city, just so you don’t think I ’m one o f those people who lie about where they’re from, like those people from Oakville who say they’re from Toronto. ’Museum o f Modem A rt 4A little explanatory note: when hence I say art, I ’ll be referring to any particular piece, such as a painting or a scultpure or a video

times, but come on: is it valid for me to think that the only art that’s good is art that I like? More impor tantly, what other means o f evalua tion could I possibly use? 1 feel like it might be prudent to give you some context o f what I like in the Art world: I think Andy W a rh o l is fa r-o u t, and I th in k V in c e n t V a n G og h is a g en iu s lunatic, and Rembrandt is the king o f people-painting. I also think that m ost im pressionism (principally Monet and anything that looks like his work) is crap. I f I had to choose my favourite kind o f art, it would p ro b a b ly be A b s tra c t E xpressionism : K andinsky, M iro and Rothko all turn my crank. B u t th a t’ s n e ith er here nor

there. The point is, I don’t know anything about Art (or art) at all, I only know what I like. Therefore, there’s no way for me to evaluate art, except based on my own per sonal preferences. H istorical and technical standpoints are out the window: I d on’t know what was in flu e n tia l or g ro u n d b re a k in g , in tertextu al5 re fe re n ces fly right over my head and I don’t know an im pasto from p o in tillism . W hat else can a boy do? Am I supposed to just believe that if everyone else lik e s a painting then it must be good? Fuck that. So like I said, we’re going to work this out together. I ’ ve done this before and received so-so reac tion, but this is my second year and

installation. When I say Art, I mean the big o l’ subject o f culture and objets themselves, like as in “ What is Art?” and so forth. 5I ’d guess that there should be a special word to do the job that I ’m trying to force upon poor old intertextual in this context. Obviously, I ’m referring to paintings which make some sort o f reference to an earlier work, by means o f content or style, as an important part o f what the artist is saying. The word would be something like interopal but my editor Marie-Hélène assures me that intertextual w ill do just

I ’m pretty sure that I have a cult like readership so you guys will all rush out to your computers to scrib ble o ff an email to me ASAP. What makes good art? Is there an objec tive way to evaluate art? Am I an arrogant buffoon for giving posi tive assessments only to pieces of art that I like and not accepting that so m eth in g th at I h ate co u ld be ‘good art’? B rin g on the fe e d b a c k 6, because I want to know what peo ple think. W e’ll talk more later.

hesser@ po-box.m cgill.ca

fine. The problem, as I see it, is that I just got a giant new dictionary for my birthday, but dictionaries can tell you only what a word you know means, they can’ t tell you what the word that means what you’re thinking is. I f someone could invent a device that could do that, I bet they’d make a lot o f money. “Friends: your insights too are important to me. I want to know what you guys think. Don’t be lazy, email me.

Why eat ham burger when you can have steak? Exploring the cosy, crazy com m unity at Bifteck...

M o n tre a l* Je n n i f er T r a w i n sk i e all know that between snowstorms and classes, the first full post-winter week back at M cGill can be a little bleak. Though I can’t exactly dis solve the slippery slush on the side walks or extend break to the length had by th o se b astard A m erican schools, what I can do, in hopes of

brightening up this transition peri od, is offer you a little trivia: Which city hotspot have such rock superstars as the Foo Fighters, M ichael Stipe and the Sm ashing P u m p k in s b een know n to v is it when in Montreal? H ere’ s a hint that may send b e lls rin g in g in you r head : the name o f the place I have in mind is F ren ch fo r "s te a k ". N o, i t ’ s not T o k y o , i t ’ s not S o n a , i t ’ s ...B a r Bifteck! And it’s one helluva great place. I f y o u ’ ve n e v e r b ee n to B ifteck, located at 3702 Boulevard

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St. Laurent, I highly recomm end that you get your butt over there; it’s a cool place. B if is little, it’ s sm oky, it plays punk m usic, and i t ’ s fu ll o f M c G ill students and interesting M ontrealers from all walks o f life. At many well-known Montreal e sta b lish m e n ts, a "h ip p er-th a n thou" attitu d e o ft p re v a ils, and while this can be a lot o f fun, faux smiles and hair fixing do get a bit tiresome. Bifteck is one o f the few places I ’ve ever gone to with an atmosphere that’ s sim ultaneously co o l-a ss and downright friendly. The leveling e ffe ct in this bar is astounding: the bartender treats everyone lik e a friend, and even famous clientele become a regular part o f the B ifte c k crow d when there — less than a week ago, Dave Grohl (o f Foo Fighters and Nirvana fame) played three rounds o f foosball there with a couple o f locals. The diverse group that popu lates B if te c k on any given date a m p lifie s the b a r ’ s a ttitu d e o f broadm indedness. In my trips to B ifteck, I’ve encountered the likes o f a just-dumped local man, a beerguzzling M cG ill T .A ., guys in a lo c a l band, a pu king Irish m a n , punks, goths, and so on. My friends and I even met some Swiss resident on the sidewalk by 4 Freres (across the street from B if ) w h o ’ d ju s t completed a solo hitch-hiking jour ney from B .C . to M ontreal...w hen we took him to Bifteck, he loved it! W ith B i f ’ s w ide-spanning group th a t in c lu d e s a hu ge ch u n k o f M c G ille rs, ch an ces are, you too will savor the Bifteck experience. Whether Bifteck is mobbed or ju st plain busy (it’ s rarely dead), service always comes with a smile (cheesy as that may sound). Even w hen w a itre s s e s are ru nning

o f a w o m an ’ s b a ck as a m an around like chickens with no heads re m o v e s h er b ra . Punk m u sic and the bartender is pouring drinks streams out the speakers on both faster than people can pronounce lev els, serving as a liv ely b a ck their names, the sta ff still brings ground to the murmur o f abundant popcorn on request and is pleasant. conversations. When business is slower than opti So what is it that differentiates mal, the head bartender and main th is p la c e and m ak e s so m any waitress are the friendliest people. M cG illers, M ontrealers, and visi The bartender suggests unconven tors keep coming back to Bifteck? tional drinks congruent with the What exactly makes this neighbor nightly specials (he advised me to hood b ar so fr e a k in ’ c o o l? M y get mm and cranberry to capitalize hypothesis is that it’s cool because on a two mm drinks for $5.50 spe it r e a lly d o e s n ’ t try to b e . I t ’ s cial, and it’s actually really good), friendly, it plays music that’s out o f co n v ey s m essag es am ongst and the m a in stre a m , i t ’ s b u ilt up a converses with bar patrons, and is diverse coalition o f patrons, and it j willing to share a laugh. The s ta ff s gives its customers the friendly ser | core o f decency spreads throughout vice they desire. Besides a tropical the bar as quickly as its bowls o f clim a te or lengthened vacatio n , free popcorn, positively influencing what else could you really ask for? the attitude o f the rest o f the bar. But "we are living in a materi [ al world," as Madonna would say, j so o f co u rse the b a r ’ s p h y sical characteristics do matter - especial ly size (just kidding!). B ifteck is a I bar with a relatively intimate set ting. On the main floor — the only flo o r open from Sunday through W ednesday — a group o f sm all tables cluster the front and a few go | along the right-hand side, facing the bar; these are crowded nightly | regardless o f date, tim e, clim ate, and exams. The bar is big - it’ s full o f drink sp e cia ls and people to order them, free popcorn for cus to m ers, and c h ille d g la ss e s fo r domestic and imported draft beer. T h e b a ck o f the m ain le v e l is replete with pool tables, foosball, and video games. T he second stage o f B ifte c k e x is ts to a cco m m o d a te the Thursday through Saturday night crowds and contains a second bar, m ore crowded tab les, more pool tables, and such eclectic artwork on the wall as a blown-up photograph

Page 16

Entertainment

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

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R e s id e n c e s Floor Fellow, Don, MORE Fellow 2 0 0 1 /2 0 0 2 Are y ou thinking a b o u t the n ext a ca d em ic y e a r yet? If y o u lik e p e o p le and are inter ested in a ch a llen g in g and rew ard ing stud ent lead ersh ip p o sition , w h y n o t ap p ly to b e a F lo o r F ellow , D o n o r M ORE F e llo w at M cG ill R esid ences? Questions??? Call th e R e sid en ce Life C oord inator at 3 9 8 -1 2 1 8

VOLUNTEER FOR SACOMSS [the Sexual Assault Centre of McGill Students’ Society] Th is w inter we are looking fo r dedicated, caring volunteers fo r one branch o f the Sexual A ssault Centre

The best music of 2000 In this first p art o f two, Trib writers discuss their y ear in music.

slo w so n g s are la c k in g . On a s c a le o f O ne to Woodstock I rate them a “Dreamy”.

• P e t e r Koven

St. Germain, Tourist

Oh God, this is going to be a short list. Can any one honestly recall a worse year for music than 2000 (excluding the 1980s, o f course)? The airwaves have become thoroughly saturated with a com bination o f rap-metal morons whom I refuse to even dignify by mentioning by name, and boy bands that somehow get w orse as tim e passes, i f that’ s possible. I stupidly th o u g h t th a t n o th in g co u ld b e w o rse than the Backstreet Boys, and it was thus much to my horror that I discovered a few weeks ago that one o f them now has some pre-pubescent brother with a hit album (Warm it up, Chris!). Pathetic. In all honesty, there were some excellent releases this year, but I ’m not even going to attempt a Top 10 cou ntd ow n b eca u se I h o n estly h a v e n ’ t heard 10 albums this year that are deserving o f that accolade (or 5, for that matter). One album that particularly stood out was the debut LP o f The Damage Manual, a col laboration between Martin Atkins (Pigface, Ministry), Chris Connelly (Ministry, KM FD M ) and others. Much like its P igface predecessor, A New High in Low , it defied any sort o f categorization, fusing many differ ent musical ideas together into something thoroughly unique and exciting. Some have claimed that it seems to be an attempt by these aging folks to live vicarious ly through the success o f their youth, but this record was a totally original experiment, bearing no real like n ess to M in istry or any o f th eir p rev io u s w ork. Definitely recommended. Numerous independent releases have explored some interesting new ground, particularly the new godspeed you black emperor! record, even as their predecessors have faltered badly (Sonic Youth, any o n e ?). T h ere have been a few strong m ajor lab el re le a se s as w ell. The D eftones’ W hite P ony and Radiohead’s K id A were both excellent, although I ’m sure I ’ m not the only one who is pretty fed up with Radiohead’ s insistence in taking themselves so seri ously that they refuse to make music that people may a c tu a lly , you know , e n jo y . I a lso lik ed the new Outkast record, which featured some truly original hip-hop, despite it being about the last album I ever expected to care about. And, o f course, the almighty D VD saved the day for the industry once again, with The B eastie Boys Anthology in particular being enough to bring a joyous tear to my eye. For the record, how ever, I have no idea what Vincent Van Gogh is doing in the ‘Hey Ladies’ video either, THAN KS FO R A S K ING.

• Keith Su th e rlan d Here is the best o f the year according to my omni scient self: Top 5 Albums:

The Apples in Stereo, The Discovery o f a World Inside the M oone (Elephant 6)

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A lthough not very well know n, these guys ca n ’t be b ea t fo r pure c a tc h i n e s s . T h e ir ‘60s inspired riffs and harmonies create a jangly pop that is sure to please a n y o n e who has ever used the w ord “ g ro o v y ” in a sen ten ce. I t ’ s not sa cch a rin e crap though, as the Apples keep it interesting with enough crunchy guitars and a lead singer whose 6 0s nasal whine can turn into a rough-edged wail when appro priate. This is unpretentious music for people who like straight up pop-rock: on songs like “G o” and “The Rainbow” the Apples are at their sing along best, with hand claps and good hooks in all the right places, and they even get a little funky on “The Bird You Can’t S e e.” The only weakness here is that some o f their

Even though Ludovic Navarre (the man behind the music) twice cancelled the St. Germain show in Montreal in December, I just can’t stay mad at the bas tard. His atmospheric jazzy beats soothe the soul and envelop the mind. St. Germain draws on a variety of styles as he weaves together this album, creating a unique sound that puts a smile on your face and a bob in your head. Navarre has more moves than the local philharmonic orchestra: he’ s got your strings, your woodwinds, and your horns too, resulting in the over all musical journey that makes Tourist such a solid album. This is one o f those CDs that you ju st throw in the player to listen to right through on a Sunday e v e n in g . S u b tle y et stro n g , lik e sw eet and sour Chinese food at its best.

Black Eyed Peas, Bridging the Gap These hip-hoppers are from the W est Coast, but they don’t care, and that’ s why I like them. They break away from the peloton o f standard hip-hop and take the yellow je rse y with their sunny outlook, caring more about getting people to shake their collective booty than battling other M C s, shooting people, or pimpin’ ho’s. Although their positivism stands in con trast to most o f the popular angry rap out there, the B E P family lays down the law and demands respect with their smooth raps, chunky beats, and unique style. Songs like “Weekend” (featuring Esthero) and “Failin’ Up” are infectious and can’t be ignored. I f you listen to this stuff and don’t get down and/or funky, you are a mere shell o f a human being and should probably shoot yourself in the head to put yourself out o f your misery.

Clinton, D isco and the Halfway to Discontent Clinton is a side project o f Ben Ayers and Tjinder Singh o f Cornershop, the group that gained w ide spread airplay with “Brimful o f Asha” and had every one singing ‘Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow’ like it was a bloody make-love-not-war hippy mantra or something. With Clinton, the pair keeps many o f their Cornershop sen sibilities, but pare down their instrumentation and use the new name to give them selves an excuse to explore different sounds and feels. The result is a fine effo rt that uses n o-frills beats, synth-pop sounds, and looped vocals to create an over all effect that doesn’t sound much like anything else I can think of. Clinton gets you grooving with their funky and eclectic basslines and keyboards that I ’m convinced might have been produced using nothing m o re than a c a s io s y n th e s iz e r and a 3 0 3 drum m achine. H ighlights include “People Power in the Disco Hour”, the dancefloor-ready “Buttoned Down D isco” complete with an Israeli vocalist that I can’t understand, and the sublime “Sing Hosanna”.

Sleater-Kinney, All Hands on the B ad One These three women from Washington rock, and this album could make my top 5 o f the year list on the strength o f the title track alone. Straight up punk played like nobody else, with raw, catchy hooks and piercing vocals, S -K is one o f the greatest rock bands o f recent memory. All Hands on the B ad One is their third release on the independent label Kill Rock Stars, and is possibly their best. Carrie Brownstein’s decep tive, softspoken vocal style contrasts perfectly with Corin Tucker’s soaring yells, all sung over powerful no-frills guitar rock timed by Janet W eiss on drums. Lying underneath their scorching m usical style are in telligent ly rics, self-co n scio u s, iron ic, and often angry, exhibiting a critical and political awareness that is rare in the world o f music these days. Besides the title track, other bomb tracks are “Y ou ’re No Rock n’ Roll Fun” and “Milkshake n’ Honey”. O f course, now that I ’ve orgasmed about this album, I should mention that the band has recently broken up. Buy all their albums while you still can.

Honourable mentions: The Hives - Swedish punk rock that will destroy everything in its path.

International Noise Conspiracy - More incredi ble Swedish music. Pow er to the people, and anti establishment. RAH! Essex Green - New Yorkers that traveled to the

Entertainment

T he M cG ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001 future from the 60s. I’m in love. Sloan - Between the B ridges is their 6th album, and although not their most success ful, is still incredible. “The Marquee and The M oon” is sublim e, and so is “W aiting for Slow Songs” Songs:

The Flashing Lights, ‘H ighschooT W ow. Super catchy E ast Coast power-pop tu ne fro m th e fo rm e r fro n tm a n o f the Superfriendz has its harmonies and heart in the right place. Fu M an ch u , ‘ K in g o f the R o a d ’ Damn, these guys know how to rock. This song is a customized Econoline van with a 200 horsepower engine, dice in the mirror, and a whole bunch o f guys getting stoned in the back. M akes you want to rock out or die trying. Talib Kweli and Hi-Tek, ‘Soul R ebels’ - Featuring De La Soul, this hip-hop track is infectious, with solid raps and a chorus that makes people bounce. Bonus points for the line “up in your face like fellatio.” Neko C ase, T o r c h lig h t’ - T his may have actually come out in 1999, but I ’m not double-checking my facts and I don’t care. An a m azin g ly h e a rtfe lt so n g , slow and painful country that will put a twang in your heart and a tear in your eye. N eko C a se’ s voice is incredible. Treble Charger, ‘American Psycho’ Y eah, so they ‘sold ou t’ with this album. W ho cares? T h ey ’re still making great alt rock music ju st like they used to, but now it gets more radio play. The Weakerthans, ‘Left and Leaving’ - This mournful song from W innipeg’ s best new band is poetic yet unpretentious, com plete with nasal vocals punctuated by a sim ple guitar tune.

• Da v i d B a r c l a y My favorite audio events Live show: Les Sexareenos rise above the plateau o f M C 5 inspired rock with every thing upbeat and jangly o f M cC oy’s era pop while completely ignoring glammed out and other fashionable “rockers.” They don’t care about your spiked belts and knee high boots. T h ey d on’ t care about your n ov elty sun glasses and skinny tie. They don’t care about your new tattoo. This is a song called rock and roll. Les Sexareenos also sound great on their new record Live, in a bed! (Sympathy

for the Record Industry) R eco rd : The A islers Set,

th e

L ast

M a tch

(Slumberland) Orchestrated pop with out the bad string arrange ments. Cloudy rock minus the horns played with junior high quality timbre. Unimportant click techno lyrics. Forgettable solos. This is cute girl/sweater boy, I love your hair cut, w on’ t you ask m e on a d ate-w ithou t the embarrassm ent. Recorded on an open real deck with smooth analogue distortion the Aislers S e t’ s bay area roots will make you forget Scotland even existed. The same day I bought this record, I also got a concussion making it all the less cognitive, hence all the more beautiful. Single: Beat Happening, Angel Gone (K) This 45, a classic maraca pop A side and a modern Dub Narcotic Sound System ren dered B side, listens like a best o f Calvin Jo h n s o n (H a lo B e n d e rs , D ub N a rc o tic , owner o f K records). A ngel G on e reflects Beat Happening’ s original punk rock attitude that inspired many scenes and sounds while Z om b ie L im bo T im e retain s all the tape delay o f dub narcotic disco bleed. Luckily, k e ep in g in m ind that C a lv in , B r e tt and Heather have been apart for some years now seems practically irrelevant as A ngel G one refuses nostalgia and does not allow ‘over 3 0 ’ criticism (see Y o La Tengo’s latest). This is 7 ” o f jump rope melody and dreamy lyrics from the group that practically invented sym pathy crushes. A new B ea t Happening LP and a box set will be released this year as well as a Calvin Johnson solo record. Label: K records K is an establish ed record lab el that revived itse lf with a few key releases this year including the massively hyped Chicks on S p e ed re m ix e s , the b r illia n t B e a t H appening sin g le , a lo v e ly Y u m e B itsu record, a beat ridden C.O.C.O. record and a great Gene Defcon single. I recommend buy ing simply by the label, it’ s like buying cool ness. Musicians o f the year: Transylvania 500 They have an organ. They have drums. The m aniac b eat from a sensational city. These crazy rhythmers gracefully belt out simple popular music. Their self titled record and lone single, which are so poorly distrib

uted that you’ ll probably never hear them anyway, are true pieces o f recorded happi ness. Not since the Crypt Kicker 5 has a con cept group so warming and timeless recorded an entire L P o f great sounding organ riffs. At the same tim e, contrary to other 2 person organ and drum bands, i.e . T h e G ob lin s, T ra n s y lv a n ia 5 0 0 m an ag es to m ain tain enough structure and complexity to make the songs pleasing over and over again. T h e choreographed madness o f their live show is also awe inspiring. They played M ontreal last October at the tiny St. Laurent establish m ent B a r fly . T h e ir w its w ere kin to an im provised session in the swamp, and not during the B .J. Honneycut years either, we’re talking about Trapper style comedy. These men are dedicated to the sound and the enter tainment. Thank you so much. Transylvania 5 0 0 records are available from W e W anna records.

• Andre Leg aspi 1.St. Germain, Tourist 2. David Gray, White L adder 3. Inter national Noise Conspiracy, Survival Sickness 4. At The Drive In, Relationship Command 5 . Deftones, White Pony 6 . Travis, The Man Who 7 .Radiohead, Kid A 8,Outkast, Stankonia 9. Paul Van Dyk, Out There And B ack 10. Tahiti 80, Puzzle

Page 17

Worst Concerts o f 2000

Michel Cusson Like I said, I ’d never laughed so hard. Oval at Foufounes The headache lasted for weeks.

Thievery Corporation Ever since they licensed their music for a Dockers com m ercial they’ve gone down hill. The ticket price was outrageous given the caliber o f their show. Jaffa at Living He may be from Montreal, he may have had some impressive D Js remix his work, but he still has no soul. Most depressing concert o f 2000 Russ Dewbury at Tokyo R u ss D ew bu ry is on e o f E n g la n d ’ s greatest D Js and the fact that only a dozen or so people showed up, even with the open bar, is a testimony to the poor state o f Montreal’s scene (hundreds paid twice as much to see him at Movement in Toronto). Best music trend o f 2000 Record stores who don’t know the value o f the used vinyl they sell. W hat goes for five dollars here goes for eighty in Toronto. Oh yeah. M o st prom ising m u sical d evelopm ent o f 2000 The occasional appearance o f W axing Deep on CK U T. W ell ok, it’ s my show. But it still rocks.

• Dan Z a c k s Best Concerts o f 2000 Bebel Gilberto at the Spectrum A sublime perform ance with someone who reduces me to a smoldering pile o f lust every tim e 1 see her liv e. The Lullaby Baxter Trio was impressive as well. New Deal opening for St. Germain atthe Spectrum. S t. G erm ain was good, but the New Deal stole the show with a pumping hourlong set that established them as the live band to see in Montreal. Michel Cusson at the Spectrum The guy didn’t even have camp value, but I hadn’t laughed so hard in ages. Da Lata at Tokyo Patrick Forge is brilliant. No more need be said.

You disagree with the choices on these lists?

\t Visit the Trib’s message board at www.mcgilltribune.ca and tell us what YOU listened to this vn |i year.

C a r n iv M

ftMe„ec

Arts U ndergraduate Society of M cG ill University (AUS)

Sm g

Friday , F eb ru a ry 2 u ntil

.s * *

A U S w o u ld like to an n o u n ce the fo llo w in g : Tw o night- lit d o w n to w n Q uebec du Ting one of the m ost exciti itg w e e k e n d s in

Arts Improvement Fund (AUIF) & Arts Students Employment Fund (ASEF) OPT-OUT Period:

the provin e 's cap ital. To rese rv e yo per room)

Jan u ary 3rd 2001- Jan u ary 12th 2001 at the AUS office - Arts Building Room B22

V acatio n s for J a n u a ry 19, or cosh

ARTS TAVERN: Jan u ary 1 1th 2001 - Shatner Ballroom V

F e b ru a ry 1 to the SSMU offices (Brow n Building,

3 6 0 0 M cTavish, suite 12 0 0 ), attention M a rk Chodos.

Page 18

Entertainment

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

So Hip it hurts A Decem ber 7th show proves the Hip are as relevant and enigm atic as ever B y Jam es Em p r in g h a m

They promise that they’re not done yet. That no end is in sight. That too many good ideas are cir culating to just pack it all up, right now , at th is ju n c tu r e . S till, y o u ’ ll have to fo rg iv e the packed house o f H ipsters at the M olson C enter D ecem b er 7th if they might have mistaken the two set, two hour plus celebration o f an artistic lexicon spanning over fif teen years o f collaborative merri ment, as a sort o f last waltz for a band as relevant as it has ever been. W ith front man Gord Downie all set to release a solo album com plete with accom panying book o f poetry and tour, and the rest o f the H ip m em b ers m u m b lin g ab ou t v ag u e c r e a tiv e m u sin g s, the Tragically Hip’s last (last?) concert in M o n tre a l b o re re m a rk a b le resemblance to that o f a farewell. Judging by the rousing ovation th at cu ed the b an d ’ s a rriv a l on stage, however, it’s a farewell that H ip fa n s h av e no in te r e s t in a ck n o w le d g in g . T h e e v e n in g began with a raucous version o f “P o e ts” , w hich led to standouts “Something On”, “Grace Too”, and

a inspired version o f “Yawning and S n a rlin g ” in w hich D ow nie was accom panied by K ate Fenner on lead v o cals. F enner, who along with bandm ate C hris Brow n has

Master o f songs. Cord.

internet shot

become a fixture on this latest tour, impressed the crowd with her vocal p ro w ess the e n tire n ig h t, and B ro w n ’ s Hammond organ added another layer to the performance, alth ou g h it n early turned “ G ift

Shop” into a lounge number. The band played a sprinkling from all o f their seven m ajor releases, and some o f the older numbers such as “ B o o ts or H e a rts ” h a d n ’ t b een heard in concert for a long time. While they were well received, the group’s earlier singles from Up to H ere and R oad Apples didn’t trans late nearly as well as those from P h a n to m P o w e r and M u sic @ Work into the arena venue, i.e. they would have been better in a bar. As the band shifted effortless ly from the high tempo rock out “Blow at High Dough” to the mys tic “Flamenco”, to the introspective “Putting Down”, it was easy to rec ognize the artistic progression o f a group consciously striving to keep it fresh. The group also performed the c u rre n tly u n relea sed tra c k , introduced as M ontreal, showing that the group is still in touch with the m u se, (n o t to m e n tio n s till aw are o f how to su ck up to a crowd.) A s m uch o f the C an ad ian music scene reads like a bible pas sage, (T ea Party begat Our Lady P eace who begat I M other Earth who b e g a t...e tc .) the T ra g ica lly Hip are somewhat o f an anomaly.

They are family men who profess little interest in the peripheral plea sures o f fam e, w hich m akes the confusion surrounding their future quite fitting. The reality is, howev er, that it’s a confusion which has been created solely by Tragically Hip fans and not the band itself. M ost likely they will collaborate a g a in , but i f th ey d o n ’ t, the December 7th show was a fine way

to say goodbye. Neil Young once cau tio n ed ag ain st the about the dangers o f fading away but perhaps M ick Jagger said it better when he confessed that in the end, it’s only rock and roll. O f course the only problem with that i s . . . he likes it.

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Castaway good but not great

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'Survivor7them e works, but ending doesn't CATHOLICS ON C A M PU S: AN EN D A N G ERED { j Is your faith going down the drain now that you are at university? G

Do you ever get the feeling that Catholic bashing is a popular classroom sport?

G Feel intimidated or confused when it is time to speak about your 'faith '? V? When introduced as a "Catholic" do you feel like you have Just been "outed"? G

Tempted to dump the practice of your 'faith ' and join the in-crowd?

Looking for a way to make sense of your Catholic faith in a secular university milieu?

January 15

Catholic on Campus

• Being Catholic at McGill? • A Call to Leadership • The Road Less Traveled

January 22

Catholic and Intellectual

• The Catholic Mind on Campus • The Catholic Scholar: Oxymoron, Moron, or Sage?

January 29

Catholic Bashing on Campus

• Popular Myths about Catholicism • Thinking Critically vs. Political Correctness • How to do more than just opt out

Press shot

B y Jeremy K u z m a r o v

On the scale o f Tom H anks’ films, Castaway rates somewhere b etw ee n F o r r e s t G um p and P hiladelphia on the high end, and J o e Versus the Volcano on the low end. Hanks stars as Chuck Boland, a Fed E x em ployee w hose life is d ictated by the c lo c k . His fa stp aced sch e d u le ta k e s a n in ety degree turn when his plane crashes over the P acific Ocean and, after m ira c u lo u s ly s u rv iv in g , he ■becomes isolated from human con tact on a reftiote island in the mid dle o f nowhere. For the first two thirds o f the film, the storyline is captivating.

D ir e c to r R o b e rt Z e m e c k is , who first teamed up with Hanks in the hit epic F orrest Gump, magnif icently captures the psychological and emotional struggle o f Hanks as he tries his best to maintain his san ity while also trying to physically survive the rigours o f his new life. T h e scen ery o f the desolate island is beau tifully film ed, and Hanks’ acting is superb. The view er develops a firm attachm ent to his character, and can empathise with his intense desire to return to his girlfriend and with his fading se n se o f hop e th a t th is g o a l is obtainable. W hile Hunt’s stock seems to be on the rise in Hollywood circles, her p e rfo rm a n ce in th is film is

la c k lu stre . Sh e u n in te n tio n a lly comes across as cold and unsympa thetic, and the film dwells too long on the aw kw ard ness o f H a n k s’ return. Like Homer’s Odyssey, which centres on the similar theme o f the quest to return hom e, Z em eck is sh ou ld have le ft the fo c u s o f C astaw ay on H anks’ ch a ra cter’ s courageous and riveting journey in the South P acific Seas. The m is guided and subpar ending spoils what could have gone down in the annals o f Hollywood movie history as one o f the great ones.

Kuz gives this film three stars ★ ★ ★

February 5

Catholic Moral Teaching

• Finding Black and White in a World of Greys • Catholic Moral Teaching: Facts & Fiction. • Moral Backbone vs. Jellyfish Morality

February 12

S e x and Catholics

• Who? What? Why? When? • Illusions, Ideals, and Realities • Sex & Destiny

February 26

A Survival Kit for the Catholic on Campus

• How not to be a stanger in a strange land • Piecing the Puzzle Together: Finding Holiness & Wholeness This six-part series helps students to discover and vibrantly live their Catholic faith with confidence on Campus and elsewhere. The series is sponsored by the Newman Centre of McGill University Sessions will take pace with refreshments on Monday nights at 7:00 at Newan Centre located at 3484 Peel Each session wil consist of a.short 15-20 minute presentation followed by a question period and discussion. . For more information phone: Newman Centre at 398-4106

po rts

Page 19

T he M c G ill T ribune , T uesday , 9 J anuary 2 0 0 1

This week

M artlet hockey team a bit puckish Team ta kes tw o o u t o f th re e a t Theresa H um es to u rn a m e n t and up 5 th because o f d ra w B y Jo n a t h a n C o l f o r d

T h e 33 rd annu al T h e re sa Humes In vitation al Tou rnam ent ended on a sim ilar note as it did last year fo r the M cG ill M artlets h o c k e y te a m , w ho d ro p p ed a c lo s e o p e n in g g a m e and th e n won the next two to fin ish fifth out o f eight teams yet again and tops in the consolation round. T h e U n iv e rs ity o f T o ro n to h a lte d h o s t te a m C o n c o r d ia ’ s streak o f eight consecutive tour nament championships with a 6 -2 w in in the to u rn a m e n t’ s fin a l. T h e W ilf r id L a u r ie r G o ld e n Hawks took third place with a 4 3 win over the N C A A D iv isio n III c h a m p io n M id d le b u r y Panthers, while the C E G E P A llstar team won seventh place with a 7 - 0 b la n k in g o f th e S a in t F ran cis-X av ier X -W om en. M cG ill and O ttaw a m et fo r the third tim e this season in the to u rn am en t’ s co n so la tio n fin a l, with M cG ill taking its first win over the G ee-G ees since last sea son in a tig h t, a g g r e s s iv e 1 -0 game marked by low shot totals and a higher-than-usual 18 penal ties given out. T h e M a r tle ts lo s t 5 - 4 on O ctob er 6 at hom e and tied 1-1 on the ro a d on S e p te m b e r 3 0 a g a in s t O tta w a , w h ich jo in e d th e C a n a d ia n I n te r u n iv e r s ity A thletics U nion’ s w om en’ s hock ey league in 1999. “ W e b o th h av e th e sa m e sty le o f p lay er, that is , a g g re s siv e, strong along the b o a rd s,” said G e e -G e e s a s s is ta n t c o a c h P ie rre T h é ria u lt. “ W e hav e an o ffe n siv e s ta r in K a r in e Bom bardier and M cG ill has Kim S t - P i e r r e , so th a t m a tc h e s up there. It’ s always a challenge to play M cG ill, and I think our girls rose to the occasio n .” T h e on ly g oal o f the gam e cam e with 4 :2 2 rem aining in the opening period as M artlet rookie Ashleigh Cranston poked a loose p u ck p ast G e e -G e e g o a lte n d e r N atasha D an sch in k o w h ile le ft alone m omentarily in front o f the goal. “Everyone had a player, the o n ly th in g is , the p la y e r w ho scored, we didn’t have her stick o f f the ic e , so the oth er p lay er made a really nice pass in front o f the net and she put it in,” said O tta w a d e fe n c e m a n K a r in a V erdon. “She didn’ t even know she had scored.” T h e M a r tle ts w ere a b le to blank one o f the C IA U ’ s hottest r o o k ie s , G e e -G e e fo rw a rd Bom bardier, who is fourth in the c o u n try w ith 13 g o a ls and 16 points in e ig h t gam es. M a rtlets h e a d c o a c h P e te r S m ith w as esp ecially proud o f the way his team played the last five minutes

o f the game. “ I th o u g h t we p lay ed very in te llig e n tly , k ep t th e p u ck in their end, never got caught with three girls deep,” he said. “I t ’s a

Sarah Lomas lunges for possession sign o f us improving, w e’ve had a lot o f one-goal games where we panicked, and we didn’ t panic in this one.”

G a m e 1: Wi l fr id L a u r i e r G o l d e n H a w k s 4, McGi l l Martlets 3 A th ird p e rio d n atu ral hat tric k by G old en Hawk forw ard Heather A llan did in the M artlets in the first gam e o f the tourna ment. A lla n ’ s trife c ta was scored w ith in fo u r m in u te s h a lfw a y through the third period, erasing th e M a r tle ts ’ h a rd -fo u g h t 3-1 lead by the fourteen-m inute mark o f the frame. The floodgates opened while M a r tle t d e fe n c e m a n A llis o n T ic m a n is w as s e r v in g a tw o m in u te ro u g h in g m in o r. S h o rt one blu eliner, M cG ill left A llan open in front o f goaltender Kim S t-P ie r re who, spraw led on the ic e in fr o n t o f th e g o a l in an attempt to force A llan to go high, could not prevent the sixth-lead in g s c o r e r in th e C I A U fro m making the top-shelf score. A llan ’ s second marker o f the game cam e two minutes later on a shot from centre ice 3 0 feet out w h ich b e a t S t-P ie r r e o v er her s h o u ld e r . B a r e ly 9 0 s e c o n d s later, Allan tipped in left-w inger Ashley C olter’ s shot from the top o f the circle to put Laurier ahead 4 -3 . T h e lo s s o v e r s h a d o w e d a g o o d d e f e n s iv e e f f o r t by th e M a rtle ts fo r m ost o f the gam e.

M c G ill w as a b le to h o ld th e C I A U ’ s le a d in g s c o r e r , L is a B a c k m a n , to one a s s is t in the g am e (w h ic h ca m e on A lla n ’ s first g oal) w hile the top line o f Sarah Lom as, S o p h i e A cheson, and P a u l a M ailloux pro d u ce d th e M a r tle ts ’ three goals. W ilfr id L a u r ie r o u ts h o t M c G ill 3 1 - 2 7 in the game. Golden H aw k n e tm inder Jo y c e T o r r in g to n m ad e 24 saves fo r the w inning side w h ile S tP ie r r e m ad e 2 7 fo r th e M artlets. The w in a llo w e d Patrick Fok th e G o ld e n Hawks to advance to the champi on sh ip s e m i-fin a l round w h ile r e le g a tin g the M a r tle ts to the consolation round. “It w asn ’ t my b est gam e, I ju s t re a lly w asn ’ t into i t ,” said St-P ierre. “W e were ahead 3 - 1 ,1 think we were thinking the game was already won, but that w asn’t the case and we got surprised by them .” “ I th in k we learn ed a lo t... that it’ s never over until the end. A t le a s t we le a rn e d fro m th a t gam e.”

G a m e 2: M cG i l l M a r t l e t s 4, C E G E P All-Star team 2 A thrilling third period fe a turing several sp ectacu lar saves by Kim St-Pierre made up for an oth erw ise sloppy gam e by both teams in the consolation round’ s sem i-final, which M cG ill took 42 on the strength o f a highlightreel breakaw ay goal by Sop h ie A ch eson at the th irteen -m in u te m ark o f the fin a l fram e w hich put M cG ill ahead 3-2. A c h e s o n to o k a lo n g p ass fro m lin e m a te P au la M a illo u x and b le w p a st th e C E G E P d e fe n d e r , b e a tin g g o a lte n d e r Annie St-O nge down low in the g love-sid e corner. M aillo u x got the M a rtle ts ’ fourth goal on an e m p ty -n e tte r w ith 3 4 se c o n d s re m a in in g and had a g o a l and two assists in the game. The win put M cG ill into the con so lation final for fifth place in the tourna ment. T h e A ll- S t a r s o u ts h o t the M a rtle ts 4 1 - 2 4 , w ith S t-P ie r re

making 39 saves for the win. “ I cam e to th is tournam ent wanting three good gam es,” said Sm ith after the win against the A ll-stars; “Sure you want to win them all, but we need three good gam es to get us ready after the break, particularly for this w eek end as w e’re playing C oncord ia and U Q T R .” T he victory snapped a fiv eg a m e w in le s s s tr e a k fo r th e M artlets. They went 0 -4 -1 since defeating the Y ork Y eow om en 41 on Novem ber 18.

in Sports M a rtle t B asketball vs. To ro nto Jan. 12 6:00 pm Love Hall M a rtle t Hockey vs. C oncordia Jan. 12 7:00 pm

N o te s

M cC onnell A rena

N a tio n a l te a m s ta r

R edm en B asketball

jo in s C o n c o rd ia

vs.

C a ro lin e O u e lle tte , a 5 '1 1 star left-w inger on the Canadian sen ior w om en’ s national team , jo in e d the C o n co rd ia S tin g ers this winter. She currently plays fo r the M ontreal W ingstar in the s e m i-p r o N a tio n a l W o m e n ’ s H ockey League and will contin ue to play for both the Stingers and th e W in g s ta r . O u e lle tte , who has com pleted her require m ents to becom e a p o lice o f fi c e r , w ill be ta k in g c la s s e s in s o c io lo g y at C o n c o r d ia and hopes to improve her English. She recorded 17 goals and 41 p o in ts in 16 g a m e s (a s o f D ecem ber 16), and was the sec ond-leading scorer in the NWHL behind Bram pton Thunder fo r w ard Ja y n a H e ffo rd , w ho has played four more games and has 4 6 points. O u ellette ch o se C o n cord ia b e c a u s e o f th e S tin g e r p r o gram ’ s “tradition o f exce lle n ce,” she said in a press release. In the T h eresa H u m es to u rn e y , O uellette led all scorers with 5 goals and 4 assists in 3 games.

To ro nto Jan. 12 8 :0 0 pm Love Hall R edm en B asketball vs. Ryerson Jan. 13 4 :0 0 pm Love Hall M a rtle t B asketball vs. Ryerson Jan. 13 2:00 pm Love Hall M a rtle t Hockey vs. UQTR Jan. 14 1:00 pm M cC onnell A rena

R e g u la r season resu m e s

R edm en H ockey

The M artlets play a crucial hom estand this w eekend. They w ill fa c e C o n c o r d ia F r id a y , January 12, at 7 pm and U Q TR on Sunday, January 14, at 1 pm. T h e M a rtle ts are cu rre n tly in la s t p la c e in th e Q u e b e c University Hockey League with an 0 -3 record, behind U Q T R (22) and C oncordia (4 -1 ), though have games in hand over the two teams. The M artlets are 9 -9 -4 over all in 2 0 0 0 -0 1 .

vs. O tta w a Jan. 14 2 :3 0 pm a t O tta w a

M cG ill Squash O UA T o u rn a m e n t Jan. 13, at W estern

Page 20

Sports

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

What's on

Roundball resolutions for the New Year M en's te a m needs to e lim in a te

W o m e n 's b a s k e tb a ll te a m s e e k in g to o v e r

"m e n ta l letd o w n s"

com e "lim ita tio n s "

B y James Em p r in c h a m

Redmen basketball head coach Nevio Marzinotto is not a propo nent o f bold predictions. “I ’m not w illing to fo recast into the future but I will say that I believe w e’re right up where we want to be.”

sistently high level o f play exhibit ed by rookie point guard Denburk Reid. “I knew Burkie [Reid] was a great player, but it’s been a pleas ant surprise that he has developed so quickly,” explained Marzinotto. “He was an A ll-Star at our tourna m ent as w e ll as at th e B r itis h Columbia tournament and it’ s for

B y Jam es Em p r in g h a m

L is e n M o o re c o n fid e n tly assures you that the M artlets are going to get better in 2001. “ I f we w ere an old er team , we’d be soul-searching right now. But we’re young and w e’re going to improve.”

This is a failure which Moore does not feel is solely attributable to the forwards. “Everyone has to box out and rebound the ball more in the sec ond h alf o f the season. W e have lim itations. W e ’re not a physical team and we lack depth so we have to play good fundamentals.”

Snow-AP: January 8-12, noon-6 PM daily. Lower Field. Drinks, food, bands, D Js, friends all in a heated tent. Featuring Pigeonhole, Bear Left, Modem Stories, The Delegates and so much m ore!!! Be There. For more info con tact us at snowap@ssmu.mcgill.ca or call 398-3010 ext. 094917. Activities Day: Wednesday, January 10, 4-9 PM. Get Involved!!! Come check out over 130 clubs. WHEN: Wednesday, January 10th from 4-9:00. Where: Shatner Ballroom. For more info contact Chris Gratto at 398-8944. Mini-Course Registration: Wednesday, January 10, 6-9 PM. Shatner Building room 107/108. For more info email Sarah at mini@ssm u.m cgill.ca or check the website at www.ssmu.ca/mini. SSM U Council Meeting: Thursday, January 1 1 ,6 PM. Shatner Building, 4th Floor Clubs Lounge.

Coach Moore puts a positive spin on a tough season

Redmen set for p layoff scramble in the QSSF Pat Fok

He is a firm believer, howev er, in destiny, and he believes that his team controls their own. “I f we can eliminate our ten dency to let down mentally, we’ll succeed. T hat’s our biggest prob lem right now.” W ith h is team en te rin g the New Year at 4-2 and currently tied for second in the Quebec Student Sport Federation conference with Laval, the Redm en are in a good position to make a playoff run. But i f the Redm en hope to have any chance at making a successful post season run, they must play smarter basketball. The two gam es th ey ’ ve lost were by a com bined score o f 4 9 points, the first to provincial rival L aval, and the second to pow er house squad from Carleton. The 72 -6 0 loss to Laval is the kind o f defeat which could com e back to haunt the Redmen due to the play o ff implication placed upon it. The team did show a lot o f mettle after the defeat, however, by reeling off a fo u r-g a m e win s tre a k , a lb e it against lesser competition. U ltim ately, M arzinotto must be re a so n a b ly p leased w ith h is team’s first half performance. They are a lock for a p layoff spot and have re ce iv e d strong play from their returning starters. Domenico M arcario has been a standout o ffe n siv e ly and Fred Bernard has been a tenacious pres ence on the defensive side o f the ball. O f particular note, is the con

goo d re a so n . He b a s ic a lly ju s t makes everyone on the court better by being there.” A lso o f note for the Redmen as they prepare to restart play in the New Year is that it seems that th ey w ill be c lo s e to c o m p le te health for the first time in recent memory. “Ari H unter should be back next weekend which will help our inside game and we’re looking for ward to get Kirk Reid back again,” Marzinotto eagerly declared. The return o f Reid will be a big boost to an offense which sput tered at tim es. The Redm en also lo o k to r e c e iv e a b o o s t fro m a favourable early schedule w hich sees them open the New Y ear with five games at home. H ow ever, d esp ite the o p ti mism which surrounds the Redmen camp entering the 2001 portion o f the season, the road to the playoffs promises to be a challenging one. The Redmen find themselves in a tough division which features the 5-1. Concordia Stingers sitting at the top. The Redmen have yet to play Concordia, but will host them in January. “Concordia’s always got kids w ho can p la y ,” reason ed co a ch Marzinotto. “Laval also has a lot o f the right ingred ien ts. I t ’ s rea lly going to come down to the three o f us fighting it out at the end o f the season.”

As you sit listening to Moore orate her o p tim istic outlook i t ’ s hard to fig u re out why s h e ’ s so c o n fid e n t. T h e f a c t is th a t the Martlets are entering the New Year at 0 -6 and have shown little proof that th e y ’ re b e tte r than th at. H o w e v e r, th e f a c t is a ls o that som ehow they are s till in good position to make the playoffs, as Concordia has only won one game, and they are capable o f the type o f s k ille d guard p lay w h ich w ins games in the playoffs. “Our guard com bo is one o f the top five in the nation,” explains M o o re . “ C h e e k a M itc h e ll is arguably the quickest point guard in the co u n try and C y n th ia Santamaria is a great leader on this team. Our guards are our engine. A s ou r g u ard s g o , so d oes our team.” T h e play o f M itc h e ll and S a n ta m a ria as w ell as fe llo w guards M au d e V a lliè r e s and Collette Anderes has been one o f the few bright spots for the Martlet squad this season. V a lliè re s is a rookie on the team, and Moore pre dicts that her success will continue. “Y o u ’ re g oing to see som e re a lly crow d p lea sin g num bers from Maude,” she promised “She’s only going to get better as the sea son progesses.” W h ile good guard play has been a staple, it has still not been enough to make up for the team’s com plete lack o f an inside game.

Wri t e, wri te, write for sports Wat ch your favouri te team Merrily, merrily, merrily Sport s is but a dream

Crytstal Wreden

On top o f their lack o f depth, m ental lapses have also hurt the Martlets at important moments this year. “ W e s till have not p layed smart for an entire forty minutes,” said Moore. The team has played great in spurts like when they scored 42 second half points against a great Q u e e n ’ s squad in N o v em b er. T h e y ’ ve also played horribly in spurts like the first half o f the same Queen’s game in which they man aged on ly 19 p o in ts p ro v id in g Q ueen’ s with an evidently insur mountable lead. Still there is reason for tem p ered o p tim ism . T h e team is expecting Sara Gagner back from an A C L injury, and she will be a force on the boards. As well, like th e ir m ale c o u n te rp a rts, the Martlets open the New Y ear with five consecutive games at home, in c lu d in g a v irtu al m u st-w in against Concordia next Tuesday. M o o re d o e s n ’ t h e s ita te to make a prediction on the remaining portion o f the campaign. “W e ’re going to finish third and then steal one on the road at B is h o p ’ s and then p rep are fo r Laval.” Moore said. W hile, M oore’s forecast may seem out o f line, i t ’ s the sort o f attitude w hich her and the team must assume if they hope to have any chance o f improving.

“HOMO HOP”: Queer McGill presents M cG ill’s first ever “Homo Hop” : a dance for boys and girls o f all ages. Friday, January 19, 9 p.m., at Thompson House 3650 McTavish. $5, Everyone wel come! SU S Blood drive: January 2326 in the Shatner ballroom. Voicing our Vision: Wednesday, January 24, 2:30-4:00 PM. Leacock 232. A forum for M cG ill students to express their views on how to improve McGill. For more info email Clara Peron, V P University Affairs at ua@ssm u.m cgill.ca. SSM U Council Meeting: Thursday, January 25, 6 PM. Shatner Building, 4th Floor Clubs Lounge. SSM U Party or Concert: Friday, January 26, 10 PM. Shatner Ballroom. More info to follow. Quebec City Trip for Carnival: Friday, February 2 until Sunday, February 4. Two nights in downtown Quebec during one o f the most exciting weekends in the province’s capital. To reserve your spot (4 People per room) please bring a cheque payable to Uniropa Vacations for 150$ by January 19, or cash before February 1 to the SSM U offices (Brown Building, 3600 McTavish, suite 1200), atten tion Mark Chodos.

Mark Chodos SSM U VP Communication and Events ce@ ssm u.m cgil!.ca 514-398-6799 www.ssmu.mcgill.ca

Sports

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

Page 21

Tis the season to be folly A th lete s c o n tin u e th e ir in fa n tile b e h a v io u r th ro u g h o u t th e h o lid a y season B y A n d r e w Raven

B e lie v e it or not, the sports w orld d o e sn ’ t take a C h ristm as break. Athletes continue to shoot, score, rebound, and submit to fed eral warrants throughout the holi day season. Here are some things you may have m issed i f y o u ’ ve been buried in books or perpetually inebriated for the last month or so.

H o w lo w can yo u go The Spanish Paralympic team, w hich p laced third in the medal count at Sydney in November, is at the cen ter o f scandal that could on ly b e a s s o c ia te d w ith the International Olympic Committee. Apparently, some members of the Spanish delegation did not have mental or physical disabilities. A member o f the men’ s gold winning basketball team made these accusa tions in a Spanish daily newspaper — the same newspaper that current ly em ploys him as a jo u rn alist— Nobody said reporters were genius es b u t...

M a k in g P a tr ic k lo o k lik e a S ain t C o lo ra d o R o c k ie s r e lie v e r Bobby Chouinard agreed to a plea bargain with the prosecution fo l lo w in g h is a rre st fo r b a tte ry . A cc o rd in g to the p ro s e c u tio n , C houinard b eat h is w ife, held a loaded gun to her head and made her beg for her life. He received a year sentence to be served in three four month installments during the o ff season. Apparently, the judge thought that being a breaking ball pitcher in C olorado was punish ment enough.

G ood Cop, Bad Cop And h ere’ s one from the “I f you ever get pulled over by a cop

lo o k at the b a d g e ” d ep a rt ment. Jazz center O lden P o ly n ice w as ch a rg e d with impersonat ing a police offi cer tw ice within a tw o-m on th span. F o llo w in g www.espn.com two separate tra ffic altercatio ns, Polynice approached the other car and fla sh e d an hon orary badge given to him by the Salt Lake City P o l i c e D e p a rtm e n t. P o l y n i c e claim ed that he was an o ff duty p o lic e o f fic e r and told one o f th e d riv e rs “ I can fin d out where you live”.

www.espn.com

O n th e w ro n g side o f th e "L aw " On D e c e m b e r 1 9 th , New E ngland P atriots co rn erb a ck Ty Law was arrested at the Canadian border in possession o f four ecstasy pills following a game against the B ills in Buffalo. In a b r ie f sta te m e n t to the press Law said, “I did not knowingly commit an illegal act. I had no idea that it was in the bag. I know this sounds stupid and maybe a little bit unbe lievable, but that’ s the honest-toGod truth”. W ell, he’ s right in one regard; it does sound stupid and unbeliev able. Regardless, headline writers ev ery w h ere sh ou ld thank him. Imagine the p o s s ib ilitie s “ L aw v io la te s law” , “Unlawful L a w ” or “ Ty UnLawful”. www.espn.com

B reaking th e b a n k W e ll, it fin a lly h ap p en ed . During this wild baseball off-sea son, a contract was signed that will mean the end o f the game as we know it. The deal was so exorbitant and unjustified that it will probably lead to a lo ck o u t fo llo w in g the expiration o f the current collective bargaining agreement in 2002 and a com plete overhaul o f baseball’ s economics. All o f this over Darren Dreifort (admit it, you were think ing A-Rod weren’t you). D r e ifo r t is a rig h t handed starter who he went 12 -9 with a 4 .1 6 E R A la st season and has a career record o f 39-45 with a 4.28 E R A . He signed a five year, $55 million deal in with the Dodgers in D ecem ber. L ast season, D reifort ranked 21st in the National League in E R A , 18th in wins and 30th in innings p itched . I f you take his average position in those three cat egories, Dreifort ranks closely with such notables as Shawn Estes and Jim m y H ay nes: N ot e x a c tly Cy Young material. The problem with Dreifort’s deal is the precedenct it sets. It drastically raises the market value for pitchers who are above average at best. There are dozens o f potential D arren D reifo rts in baseball, and there is no way small or even medium market teams can survive in a league that pays 11 million dollars a years for medioc rity.

All hail F e rn an d o Tatis A m id th e in s a n ity o f fre e agency, the E xpos pulled o f f an e x c e lle n t trade and m anaged to acquire their first real third baseman since Tim Wallach. The ‘ S p o s sen t D u stin Hermanson and Steve Kline to the Cardinals for Fernando Tatis and Britt Reames. Tatis hits for power

and average, has good speed (2 0 ste a ls in ’ 9 9 ), gets on b ase and plays gold glove calib er defense. He’ s a soothing sight after years of M ike M ordecai, M ichael B arnet, Shane Andrews, Sean Berry, Bret B arberie and the im m ortal Frank Bolick. The other player acquired in the deal, Britt Reames, is bit old for a rookie (27) but has the potential to be a good fourth starter or mid dle man. The Expos w on’t really miss Dustin Hermanson who was maddeningly inconsistent over the last two sea sons. S in ce ’98 his ERA has risen from 3.14 to 4.77 and his 14 lo s s e s led the team in 1999 and 2 0 0 0 . The rotation should be solid with Javier V a z q u e z , C arl P a v a n o , T o n y A rm as J r . and tw o o f M ik e Thrum an, R eam es, H ideki Irabu and possibly Donnie Bridges. The Expos will be hurt by the loss o f Steve Kline who made 77 or more appearances in each o f the last 3 seasons and anchored a bullpen plagued by injuries last year. But it’s a small price to pay for the pop that Tatis brings to the middle o f the lineup, which is looking meati er than it has in years.

R etu rn o f M cSorley? A s o f Ja n u a ry f ir s t, M arty M c S o rle y was e lig ib le to begin practicing with a National Hockey League team and not surprisingly, there was a complete lack o f inter e st in h is s e r v ic e s . M c S o rle y almost signed a deal with a German club but backed out o f the arrange ment because the team would not include a clause that would allow him to return to the NHL after his su sp e n sio n ends on F e b . 2 1 s t.

www.espn.com M cSo rley wants to make another go o f it, but h is N H L ca re e r is probably over. At 37, M cSorley has recount like speed and the defensive aware ness o f Patrice Brisebois. He would have enough trouble landing a jo b without the public stigma o f being the epitom e o f all that is wrong with hockey.

H a b s fo r Sale? A fte r re ad in g through the

G azette c la ssifie d s, 1 found this interesting offer. For Sale: National H ockey League fran chise with a d evou t fan b a s e , sto rie d p ast, w orldw ide reco g n itio n and new management. Complete with fiveyear-old arena located in the heart o f downtown. Valued at 250 m il lio n . S e llin g fo r 125 m illio n or highest offer. Motivated seller. Call 514-347-7109.

Dumbass Americans and college sports jo u r n a l is ts and coach es v o te on who they b e lie v e the b est team is. Through these rankings, the “win ner” is chosen. W ouldn’t it make m ore sense to have a p la y o ff to crown a champion? . I f F lorid a S ta te would have beaten Oklahoma, then there would have been many teams who could have rightfully claim ed that they d eserv ed to be the num ber one team in the nation. The University o f Miami beat Florida State earlier in the season and the University of W a sh in g to n d e fe a te d the University o f M iami. All o f these teams would have had one loss and so the champion would have been chosen based on opinion and not on performance.

Out of left field

Neil Schnurbach

he United States may be the land o f the fr e e and the home o f the brave, but when it com es to cro w n in g a c o lle g e fo o tb a ll N a tio n a l C h a m p io n , Americans are just plain dumb. On January 3, the Sooners o f the University o f Oklahoma defeat ed the Florida State Seminoles 13-2 in the O range B ow l to earn the NCAA championship. The Sooners were the only unbeaten team in all o f c o lle g e fo o tb a ll so it m akes sen se th at they w ere d ecla re d champions. What does not make sense is the way that the National champi onship is determined. A panel o f

Here in Canada we have a sys tem that makes sense. The top four teams from each conference make the playoffs. Eventually through a series o f playoff games, the top two teams in the country play for the Vanier Cup. This year, the Ottawa G e e -G e e s d e fe a te d the R e g in a Rams 42 -3 9 to win the cup. There were no arguments about who the w inner was unlike in the United States. T h e A m e ric a n sy stem a lso rem oves an extrem ely im portant aspect o f team sport: the ability to gel as a unit. In the N C A A i f a team loses its first two games, its season is over. There is no chance fo r that team to b e ch a m p io n s. Even if that team meshed together and won its next nine games, they would be ranked only seventh or eighth. It does not matter that this was the best team at the end o f the season. The first game matters just as much as the last game.

And what i f a star player is injured fo r one game and con se quently his team loses? Should the team then not have the right to play for the championship? Sports should be about athletic competition and not about politics. Voting is an extrem ely important right, but it should not be exercised on the playing field . A m ericans would be smart if they took the top sixteen teams in the country and let them have a playoff to determine a cham pion. That would solve the problem that is plaguing American college football today. So for once in our existence, it seems that Canada has a better sys tem in place than the United States. T h e N C A A should tak e its cue from the CIAU and implement the Canadian system. It would be good for the future o f the game.

Whiteface Mountain & Stay P ack ages fro m $ 4 4 ( u .s ) p p , p d .* Great deals for midweek skiers and riders with accomodations Sunday - Thursday. Rates include one" ..**••* night’s- , day Æ lodging and one-day ket. Whiteface lift ticket. R e stric tio n s^ Apply 8 8 8 -w h ite fa c e (9 4 4 -8 3 3 2 ) w w w .w h ite fa c e r e g io n .c o m

Page 22

Sports

T he M c G ill T ribune, T uesday, 9 January 2001

Quoth the Ravens B a ltim o re w ill w in firs t AFC ch a m p io n s h ip since th e y w e re th e Colts by

eil

fo r the M V P award this season. L o o k f o r th e V ik i n g s to destroy the G iants this weekend a t th e M e a d o w la n d s in N ew Je rse y . W h ile th e V ik e s do h a v e som e d e fic ie n c ie s in th e ir s e c ondary, the G ian ts do not have the o ffe n s iv e e x p lo s iv e n e s s to ta k e a d v a n ta g e o f th a t. N ew Y o rk quarterback K erry C o llin s has had his best year since 1997 but he may fa lter under the pres sure this Saturday. On the other hand, V ik in g s fir s t y e a r s ta rtin g q u a rte rb a c k Culpepper look s lik e a veteran. H is c o n f id e n c e and w id e re c e iv e rs w ill m ake the G ia n ts d efense look lik e am ateurs. A ll o f th is ad d s up f o r a blow out victory fo r the V ik in g s. S c h n u rb ’ s fe a r le s s p r e d ic tion: V ikings 37 G iants 14

Sc h n u r b a c h

A fte r a w eekend of b low ou ts, lo o k fo r som e b etter g a m e s th is S u n d a y w h en th e A F C and N F C c h a m p io n sh ip s w ill take place. In the N FC a ffa ir, the su r p ris in g N ew Y o r k G ia n ts w ill play the M in n esota V ik in g s led b y th e t r iu m v ir a t e o f R a n d y M o s s , C ris C a r te r and D au n te Culpepper. M in n e so ta stru gg led at the end o f the season but looked to b e in top fo rm in th e ir 3 4 - 1 6 v ic to r y o v e r th e New O rle a n s S a i n t s . R a n d y M o s s w a s h is e r s t w h ile s e l f w ith tw o lo n g touchdow n catch es. T h e G ia n t s w e re e q u a lly im p ressiv e in th e ir 2 0 - 1 0 romp o v e r the P h ila d e lp h ia E a g le s . T h e G iants ste lla r d efense neu tr a liz e d th e E a g l e s ’ D o n o v o n M cN abb who was the runner up

In the A F C co n test the s ti

flin g B a ltim o re R aven s d efense w ill ta k e on th e a ll a ro u n d attack o f the Oakland R aiders. B altim o re is com ing o ff o f a great win at T e n n e sse e ag ain st the defend ing Su p er B ow l run ner up T itan s. D efen siv e player o f the year R ay L ew is was dom in an t in retu rn in g an in te rc e p tion 5 0 yards fo r a touchdow n. T h e R a id e r s d e fe a te d th e D o lp h in s on S a tu rd a y by th e score o f 2 7 -0 . The R aid ers were great on both sides o f the b a ll. T hey are led by the A F C ’ s pro bow l startin g q u a rterb a ck R ic h Gannon. W h ile the crowd in Oakland m ay be one o f th e m o st e n e r g e t ic in a ll o f th e N a tio n a l F o o tb a ll L eag u e, the h om efield advantage w ill p ro bab ly not be enough fo r the R aid ers. O a k la n d ’ s r u n n in g b a c k s T yrone W heatley and N apolean K a u fm a n a re on th e lim p and

w ill n o t b e v e r y e f f e c t i v e against B altim o re. B a ltim o re ’ s seco nd ary w ill a ls o b e a b le to n e u t r a li z e O a k la n d ’ s a ir a t t a c k . T h e R a id e r s ’ m ain th re a ts at w id e r e c e i v e r a r e T im B r o w n and A n d re R is o n . B o th o f th e s e r e c e iv e rs w ere o n ce top w id eouts in the leag u e but are now c le a r ly in the tw ilig h t o f th e ir careers. B a ltim o r e ’ s C h r is M c A llis te r and R od W o o d so n w ill certain ly be m ore up to the challenge o f stopping O akland. T h e problem fo r B a ltim o re lie s in th e ir inep t o ffe n se . T h e R avens are led at quarterback by the much m aligned Trent D ilfer. In th eir v icto ry over the T itan s th is w eekend D ilfe r only c o m pleted fiv e passes fo r 116 yards. A perform ance like that w ill not be enough against the R aid ers. T h a n k fu lly th o u g h , D ilfe r

w ill b e h e lp e d o u t by r o o k ie s e n s a tio n Ja m a l L e w is . L e w is w as o n e o f th e b e s t r u n n in g b acks in the league this year and h e lp e d th e R a v e n s to a 1 2 - 4 r e c o r d . H is r u n n in g g a m e sh ou ld be enou gh to ca rry the R avens to a v icto ry in a d efen sive struggle. I t lo o k s l ik e th e fo u r o ’ c lo c k gam e th is Su n d ay w ill be the m ost e xcitin g game o f the p layoffs. S c h n u r b ’ s fe a r le s s p re d ic tion: R avens 14 R aid ers 10 I f these pred iction s com e to p a s s , o n e o f th e N F L ’ s to p offen ses w ill play one o f the top d efen ses fo r the cham p ion sh ip. T hat is a recip e fo r a Superbow l cla ss ic betw een the V ikin gs and the R avens.

Kickimus maximus buttimus NHL 2001 v id e o g a m e review :

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(U -W IR E ) B E R K E L E Y A fter w aiting in line sin ce 5 :3 0 o n ly to fin d ou t th a t th e E l C errito , C a lifo rn ia , T a rg e t only had sixty PlayStation 2 ’ s to sell, th e re w as no w ay I w as g o in g hom e em pty-handed. I had been 67th in line - so close and yet so far - and figured i f I was going to home without a new console, the le a s t I co u ld do w as p ic k up a new g a m e fo r m y v e n e r a b le PlayStation zero. T h e gam e I c h o se , N H L 2 0 0 1 , was a more than adequate consolation prize. Though it lacks the stu n n in g g ra p h ic s its P S 2 cousin no doubt boasts, the latest in sta llm e n t in E le c tr o n ic A r ts ’ dom inant pro hockey series has gameplay to die for. M a k in g th e b e s t o f th e ir r e s o u r c e s , the gam e d e sig n e rs h a v e s c a le d b a c k th e g ra p h ic detail from last year’ s model a bit in order to provide the speed and action o f real NHL games. Add in the obligatory season and playoff modes, plus the inclusion o f sev eral international team s, and the re su lt is one o f the b est sports games available on any platform. H o ck e y , w ith its fa s t p lay , big hits, and fistfig h ts, has long b ee n th e b e s t-s im u la te d m a jo r sport in video games. As far back as the Sega G enesis’ s NHLPA or ev en th e 8 - b it N in te n d o ’ s Ic e H o ck e y , q u a lity ic e title s have c o n v e r te d g a m e rs w ho d o n ’ t know an ic in g c a ll fro m a plus/minus rating into m aniacal puckheads. P e rh a p s w e h a v e v id e o g am es to b la m e fo r the a n o m a lo u s p r e s e n c e o f p ro h o c k e y f r a n c h is e s in T a m p a B a y , N a s h v ille , and P h o e n ix . I f so, NHL 2001 is worth it.

T he gam e’ s lightning speed is unlike any hockey gam e I ’ ve played before, and the manner in which E lectro n ic Arts integrates th is w ith r e a l i s t i c s c o r in g , d e fe n se , and p en alty c a llin g is impressive. W hile the excitem ent o f one-tim ers, give-and-gos, and b lis t e r in g s la p s h o ts is to be e x p e c te d , p la y in g d e fe n s e in N H L 2 0 0 1 is i f p o s s ib le even more fun. Rather than the lim ited onebutton bashing o f hockey games past, here you can poke ch e ck , body check, and cross check with the effectiveness o f your strategy d epending on the situ ation and the s k ills o f the p lay ers on the ic e . P en a lties corresp o nd a ccu rately to what happens on the ice — try and poke with your stick fro m b e h in d an o p p o n e n t and y o u ’ ll get a h ooking c a ll, body c h e c k at th e w ro n g a n g le and y o u ’ ll g e t s e n t to th e b o x fo r roughing. In ad dition to regu lar stick and body check buttons, there’ s a third op tio n — the fie r c e “big hit,” which can knock Pavel Bure out for the season, or ju st as easi ly send B o b Probert to the com m issio n er’ s o ffic e fo r a suspen sion. Balancing the dangers o f the hit system makes for frantic and excitin g gam eplay, esp ecially in N H L 2 0 0 1 ’ s e x e m p lary seaso n mode. Behind in a game, do you play aggressively and risk penal ties, or do you play conservative ly and give the enemy the chance to put the game away? In season m ode, w here players go on and o f f h ot and co ld s tre a k s , your stars can be beset by freak off-ice inju ries, and the electro n ic Gary B ettm an hovers w aiting to take you r e n fo r c e rs o f f the ic e , the c h a lle n g e o f team m anagem ent b e tw e e n g a m e s is n e a rly as

relentless as the actual contests. W h ile th e s e d e t a ils w ill appeal more to hardcore hockey fans like m yself, th ere’ s enough o p tio n s in N H L 2 0 0 1 to allow m o re c a s u a l g a m e rs to e n jo y them selves. You can adjust game speed (b e lie v e it or not, it gets e v e n f a s t e r th an th e fla m in g default m ode) and disable icing, tw o-line pass, and offsides calls. G et rid o f the blue lines for an in te rn a tio n a l-s ty le gam e, or tu rn p e n a ltie s w ay d ow n fo r Stanley Cup-type action. Like the a lso e xem p lary E A title T rip le P lay 2 0 0 1 , p e rfo rm in g ce rta in fe a ts in gam ep lay rew ards you with points you can use to boost your self-created players’ stats. T h e re ’ s also a “m om entum m eter” fo r each team in a game th a t g o e s up and d ow n w ith p e n a ltie s , b ig c h e c k s , in ju rie s , and breakaw ays. It doesn’t seem to have a trem endous a ffe c t on gameplay on the higher difficulty le v e ls , and the oth erw ise w ellin te g ra te d a n n o u n ce rs tend to com m en t on m om entum m o v e m ents too m uch, but it is a fun touch, and like m ost o f the fe a tures in the game, can be turned on or o f f at the p lay ers’ d iscre tion. W ith the added to u ch e s o f s h o o to u t m o d e , a h a n d fu l o f p la y a b le in te r n a tio n a l te a m s ( q u ic k : w h o se r o s t e r is m o re anonym ous, the Colum bus B lu e J a c k e t s ’ or th e K a z a k h s ta n national team ’ s?), and a boatload o f other options to diverse to go into here, NHL 2001 for P S X is the best hockey game out there, PlayStation 2 be damned. Spend a fe w h o u rs w ith th is t i t l e , and y o u ’ ll alm ost fo rg et w aking up b e fo r e su n ris e and s t ill g o in g home empty-handed.

Sports

T he M cG ill T ribu n e , T u esd a y , 9 J an u ary 2001

Global don't got it

Sports briefs R edm en hockey team 's E uropean V acatio n

Out of right field Jeremy Kuzmarov F o r those o f us who lik e to k ic k b a c k on a S u n d a y a f t e r noon and w atch som e fo o tb a ll, the G lo b a l te le v is io n netw ork, lik e Newm an on the form er hit te le v is io n s e rie s S e in fe ld , is a m a jo r n u is a n c e — to sa y th e least. S in ce the b egin n in g o f last y e a r , th e C a n a d ia n n e tw o r k b am b o o zled its way in to p ic k in g up th e fe e d fo r v ir tu a lly every N ational F o o tb a ll leagu e gam e b road cast. T h e e ffe c t is m iserab le fo r C anadian view ers. B e c a u s e o f it s n e e d to to o t its ow n h orn , C an ad ian f a n s a r e f o r c e d to s u f f e r through co u n tle ss m inutes o f dead air tim e w ith the a b h o r rent G lo b a l’ s G ot It in sig n ia. A d d it io n a ll y , th e G lo b a l co m m e rcials are redundant and id io tic. Instead o f w atching the e n te r ta in in g and c u ttin g ed g e A m e r ic a n a d s, C a n a d ia n s are fo r c e d to s lu d g e th ro u g h th e sam e p o o rly m ade B u d w e is e r b e e r and R i c o l a c o u g h d ro p c o m m e r c i a l s o v e r an d o v e r again. T h e fr u s tr a tio n is m a g n i fie d te n fo ld during the b ro a d c a s t o f th e S u p e r B o w l w hen Fortune 5 0 0 com p anies in vest a larg e portion o f th eir a d v e rtis in g b u d g e t f o r c o m m e r c ia l

s p a c e , and s u b se q u e n tly show o f f the cre a tiv e geniu s o f their ad vertising e x e cu tiv e s. I n s te a d o f e n t e r t a i n in g c o m m e r c ia l s h o w c a s e e v e n ts l i k e B u d B o w l 1 0 , and th e u n fo ld in g o f th e la t e s t P e p s i s lo g a n , a ll w e g e t h e r e in C a n a d a — b e c a u s e o f G lo b a l — is the tired and sen seless ad fo r th o se R ic o la C o u g h drops that few o f us w ill ev er buy, let alone see in a store. T h o se G lob al fo lk s are also sn eaky, th e y d e v is e d a d e c e p tiv e sch em e o f s u p e r im posing th eir own a d s o n to th e b r o a d c a s t p ic tu re . Any a s tu t e o b s e r v e r is a b le to r e c o g n is e th at P iz z a P iz z a and C an ad ian T ire ads are sh a m efu lly out o f p la c e in G ia n ts s ta d iu m and o t h e r A m e r ic a n p a r k s . T h e q u e stio n is how low is G lo b a l w illin g to go in order to b oost its a d v e r tis in g s a le s . W h a t’ s n e x t? R e p la c in g p la y e r s ’ j e r sey n u m b ers w ith R ic o la s lo g a n s, and p a la c in g a G lo b a l’ s G ot It add on the fo o tb a ll? T h e b ig g est d isg race about G lo b a l is the fa c t th a t it b ills i t s e l f up as a l o c a l C a n a d ia n

te le v is io n n e tw o rk . T h e q u e s tio n is w h e r e ’ s th e C a n a d ia n co n ten t? Is C anadian te le v isio n and film -m a k in g c a p a c itie s so m eagre that G lob al has to pan d er to its A m e r ic a n c o u s in s ? A n d w h a t a b o u t C a n a d ia n sp o rt? W hy d oes G lo b a l have to b ro a d ca st N a tio n a l F o o tb a ll L eag u e gam es when th e re ’ s an e x c itin g brand o f p igskin being played in the C anadian F o o tb a ll L e a g u e and in th e C a n a d ia n un iv ersity ranks. F o r m any y e a rs C a n a d ia n cu ltu re has struggled to em erge from the shadow o f the U nited S ta te s , and G lo b a l’ s p rim a rily A m e r ic a n p r o g r a m m in g c e r tain ly d o esn ’ t help m atters. As th e C a n a d ia n B r o a d c a s t i n g C orporation show s, Canada has a lo t to o f f e r in te rm s o f the m o v ies, te le v is io n , and sp orts. It is about tim e that we begin to c e le b r a te ou r ow n c a p a c itie s , an d a c h i e v e m e n t s , and g iv e lo ca l talen ts the opportunity to e x c e l. It is tim e fo r G lob al to help f a c i li t a t e — and n o t s t if le — this p ro cess.

Page 23

N o, C h ev y C h a se w a sn ’ t there, but the Redmen posted a 3-1 record in the Old W orld, beating three German teams after losing their opener to a Dutch team. The finale o f the four game set took place on Jan.5 in Ulm-NeuUlm, Germany, some 150 kilome tres northw est o f M u nich. The Redmen beat EHC Atlantis 6-4, a fir s t-p la c e team in the B ez irk slig a a n d . G reg D avis o f Calgary snapped a 3-3 tie only 18 seconds into the third period and added an insurance goal along with one assist. Freshman right winger Chad Blundy o f O akville, Ont., scored the winner on a shorthanded goal at 3 :5 3 o f the third. Junior centre D avid B u rg e ss o f C ry stal C ity , M an., scored one goal and added three assists for the Redmen. Other Redmen goals were scored by cap tain Dan McClean o f North York, O n t., and ju n io r S té p h a n e Ducharme of Joliette. Que. G oaltend er M urray C obb o f Roxboro, Que., received credit for the victory, his third straight win on the 4-gam e European tour. He saved 10 o f 11 shots while playing only the third period as M cG ill used three netminders in the game.

Marlets basketball still w ith o u t v ic to ry On Su n d ay in K in g s to n , Cheeka M itchell scored 33 points and had 7 rebounds, 6 assists, and 4 steals in the M cG ill M artle ts’ h eartb reakin g 7 3 -6 9 loss to the Q ueen’ s G olden G aels w om en’ s basketball team. Lysiane van der Knaap was perfect from the floor and the line and finished with 10 points and 5 rebounds. Erin Mullan also had 10 points and 2 rebounds. The M artlets played well in the second h alf as the halftim e score was 43-36 for Queen’s. “Our second half performance has b een g o o d ,” o ffe re d co a ch L isen M oore. “Our problem has been getting into foul trouble in the first half. The most important thing has been our offense and transition in the second half.” A t the end o f 2 0 0 0 , the Martlets lost all three games they p lay ed at the S t. M a ry ’ s T ou rn am en t. On D ece m b e r 2 9 , M cG ill lost 6 1 -4 9 to St. M ary’s. On December 30, the Martlets lost 6 4 - 5 9 to S t. F ra n c is X a v ie r in w h ich M c G ill did a goo d jo b

d efen d in g th e in te rio r. On D e ce m b e r 3 1 , P .E .I . o v ercam e McGill 97-94 in overtime, a game in w h ich C h ee k a M itc h e ll and Maude Vallieres led the team with 3 0 and 2 9 p o in ts re s p e c tiv e ly . M itchell and V allieres both aver aged about 15 points each in the other two games. -David Schipper

M cG ill-A d idas a th le te s o f th e w e e k D ave B u rg e s s and C h e e k a M itchell were named the M cG illAdidas athletes o f the week. B urgess, a third year center from Crystal C ity, M antioba had five goals and six assists in four games on the Redm en’s European tour. Mitchell, a second year guard fro m L a c h in e Q u e b e c had 33 points along with seven rebounds and six assists in the Martlets 7368 loss to Queen’s.

R edm en w in one o f th re e in UBC to u rn e y After dropping their first two g am es in the to u rn am en t, the R edm en cam e back to beat the ev en tu al to u rn am n et cham p ion from Trinity W estern University 81-67. D om enico M arcario led the triumphant Redmen with 26 points and 10 rebounds. Tournament allstar Denburk Reid added 13 points and seven assists. T h e R edm en lost th eir first contest 81 -74 to Calgary. Reid led the troops w ith 18 p o in ts, fo u r assists and four rebounds. G am e tw o w as a ls o d is a p pointing for M cG ill’ s squad. They were trounced 90 -7 3 by the U BC Thunderbirds. Swingm an Hidesh Bhardwaj led the Redmen with 14 points.

M c G ill star to p la y in S hrine Classic After winning the J. P Metras trophy as the best defensive line man in the country, M cGill captain Randy Chevrier is headed to San Francisco to play against the top senior talent in American college football. He will be lining up on Suday in the Shrine Classic as one o f two Canadian representatives. Y o u can c a tc h C h e v rie r, who enjoyed a stellar five year career with the Redm en, on The Sports N etw ork(TSN ) on Saturday at 4 PM . C h ev rier is hoping that the Sh rin e B ow l w ill be a stepping stone to a succesful professional career.

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