The McGill Tribune Vol. 24 Issue 13 by The Tribune

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NEWS: Poutine? No, Putin. Oh. Russian democracy? Gravy.

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Curiosity delivers. Vol. 24 Issue 13

P U B L I S H E D BY T HE S T U D E N T S ' S O C I E T Y OF M C G I L L

A&E: Goodbye to the cheesy DJs, CKUT's got a new edge.

SPORTS: Steve Young & the Restless? Sports & Soaps alike.

UNIVERSITY

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Exec takes one to the face Irate stu d e n t uses shaving cre a m pie to protest tuition, M o n ty Python-style JENNIFER JETT Students' Society Vice-President (Community and Government) Daniel Friedlaender was already having a bad day. Early in Thursdays SSMU council meeting, councillors blocked the Community and Government committee from presenting its full report, claiming committee members had not properly consulted with students when formulat ing SSMU policies. . It only went downhill from there. M id w ay through Friedlaender's regular report, student Lazar Konforti walked in wearing a toque and scarf to conceal his identity. Reaching from behind, he shoved a shaving-cream pie into Friedlaender's face as witnesses stared in disbe lief. "W ha t just happened was shocking, com pletely disrespectful, and inappropriate to what is supposed to go on here," Speaker Ewa Krajewska said at the meeting, and councillors passed a motion to that effect. Friedlaender called the act "despicable." "I don't think that there's any place for that kind of behaviour at any level of politics, espe cially student politics, when all people are trying to do is what's best for students," he said. "If you disagree with how ' someone is trying to go about it, that's fine, but that kind of behaviour I think is ridiculous."

in sid e

Pie for policy change The pie incident coincided with the release of a Community and Government committee report that signals a reversal of SSMU tuition pol icy. The report proposes that SSMU lobby the government to peg provincial tuition to the infla tion rate—if the province returns the $ 103-mil lion in financial aid cut from the budget this sum mer. This is a significant change from SSMU's uncompromising support for the legislated tuition freeze. The proposed change reverses 10 years of SSMU policy, said Konforti, and breaks ranks with provincial lobby group la Fédération étudi ante universitaire du Québec. "I chose to throw a pie because it is a silly w ay of protesting," he said, "and the events I'm protesting are rather silly, but not the' Monty Python kind of silly. They're dangerously silly, and Friedlaender is on the verge of destroying 10 years of student action." By offering a compromise, Konforti said, Friedlaender is legitimizing the $ 103-million in cuts to financial aid. "[Friedlaender is] trying to play it as a bar gaining tactic, but when you bargain that w ay it's kind of telling the government it's all right that [they] made the [$ 103-million] cuts," he said. Konforti, U3 Psychology, said he was

t »

See TU IT IO N , page 2.

2&8 VASEMIN EMORY

How do you like it? Banana cream, custard cream, shaving cream? We like pie so much (well, maybe not that last kind) that the creamy treat has spread itself all over our pages.

The (usually) dependable last-minute exam recipe One all-nighter, plus four large coffees, two Ritalin, two coursepacks, three donuts, and one set o f another student's notes. Combine in one tired body and add a dash of nervous anticipation. Fry overnight. Perform under intense pressure for three hours for one semi-satisfactory exam. See pages 14 and 15.

This Week in McGill Athletics Fri., Nov. 26 at 7:30 pm Redmen Hockey vs Brock (McConnell Arena) Fri., Nov. 26 Volleyball (W) 6pm (M) 8pm vs Laval {McGill Sports Centre) Sat., Nov. 27 at 7 pm Redmen Hockey vs W LU (McConnell Arena) Sat., Nov. 27 at 9 am McGill Open (Tomlinson Fieldhouse) Sun., Nov. 28 Volleyball (W ) 1 pm (M ) 3 pm vs Sherbrooke

Sun., Nov. 28 at 1 pm Martlet Hockey vs Carleton

(McGill Sports Centre) (McConnell Arena)

news

CAMPUS NEWS

Tuition p o lic y d is a p p o in ts

CAMPUS NEWS

The merits of protesting with pastry

Adm inistration is firm under CAFS pressure

Continued from cover.

Students and profs disagree over secretive com m ittee plans

C H A R L T O N R. D W IG H T

The structure of the Dining at M cG ill advisory committee, which will examine food services on the down town campus, came under fire from both students and professors at Wednesday's university Senate meet ing. The university created the commit tee in response to demands from the Coalition for Action on Food Services, which collected 7 ,5 0 0 signatures last year protesting the possibility of a cor porate monopoly over campus cafete rias. Student senators spoke outagainst the w ay administration offi cials established the committee as well as the parameters of its charter. Arts Senator M a x Reed ques tioned w hy the administration had cir cumvented traditional governance pro cedures by unilaterally appointing stu dents to the committee and why the committees recommendations will be kept confidential until Vice-Principal Administration and Finance M orty Yalovsky releases his decision on the

issue. According to Reed, the adminis tration's decision to appoint students to the committee undermined the princi ple of student representation. Reed also worried that keeping the commit tee's report confidential will hinder public debate. "This is a very disturbing w ay to set up a committee," said M ic ro b io lo g y and Immunology Professor Nicholas Acheson, vice-pres ident internal of the M c G ill Association of University Teachers. "As far as I'm concerned, the w a y this committee was set up avoided consul tation, rather than seeking consulta tion." Yalovsky said that the administra tion has solicited written submissions from members of the M cG ill communi ty who wish to share their concerns so that the committee can hear all points of view. The Students' Society unani mously endorsed the CAFS submission at Thursdays council meeting. The committee's recommenda tions will remain confidential until he announces his decision, Yalovsky

said, "so as not to have the work of the committee debated in public prior to the -completion of the committees report, recommendations, and myresponse." Yalovsky also said there is no need for a more permanent oversight committee. Computer Science Professor Sue Whitesides urged the administration to take student concerns into account. "The food service and the space within which it is administered has an enormous impact on the quality o f stu dent life," she said. After the Senate meeting, Achgjion said that he thought the stu dent questions were right on and that all members of the M cG ill community should be allowed to take part in the food service debate to legitimize the administration's final decision. Principal Heather Munroe-Blum defended the administration's methods of seeking opinions. "I really ask for some understand ing in this regard, because let me say the university's operated for 18 0 years without doing this," she said. ■

SSMU BRI EF Public censure o f B oG rep fails

Students' Society councillors voted 6-9 against pub licly censuring Students' Society Board of Governors Representative Matthew Howatt at Thursday's council meet ing. If the censure had passed, SSMU would have taken out ' ads in campus publications denouncing Howatt's actions. SSMU councillors' displeasure stemmed .from Howatt's disagreement with a Board motion that would have cleared the w ay for SSMU acting President Andrew Bryan to replace Howatt as a voting Board member. Howatt stated his disagreement with the motion at the November 1 Board meeting. The motion later failed. Howatt said he expressed his personal disagreement to underscore that only SSMU, not the Board, can decide its representative. "I proposed this motion, I argued for this motion, and

I voted for this motion," he said. The criticism he has received, Howatt said, is based upon secondhand information. M anagem ent Representative Joshua Lebovic agreed. "W hile I personally d o not agree with what happened that day, the information that we've been given is some what vague and unclear," Lebovic said. An incensed H ow att challenged councillors to impeach him, claiming that publicly censuring him "w ill do irreparable harm to our relations with the Board of Governors." Education Representative Rob Green said that the pro posed cènsure was symbolic, and that Howatt should feel fortunate that council was not seeking impeachment. "The bottom line is [the Board is] a political forum, and any noise you make has an impact," Green said. "W e can't deny fhat." —Jennifer Jett

under the impression that the long-term goal of the broader student movement is to abolish tuition altogether. "In a way, having, tuition, albeit frozen, is a concession made b y the student movement, and then here we have Friedlaender wanting to make further concessions, which is wrong," he said. One thing he wished he had done differently, Konforti said, is to use whipping cream instead of shaving cream. "Shaving cream is mean. It stings, and it tastes bad," he said. "W hipping cream is more funny, but I didn't have time to get it." In addition, Friedlaender claimed that M c G ill Daily editors knew about the plan to pie him. "The fact that people knew it was going to happen and they didn't do anything is extremely shameful," he said. The Daily was indeed tipped off in advance, said News Editor Erika Meere. She said it was not her responsibility to warn Friedlaender. "M y job is just to report on that," she said. "I don't want to interfere in what's going to happen."

IW ONA LINK

Friedlaender said the entire affair has left him disillusioned. "It's fairly ridiculous to me, the whole thing, on top of the fact that council didn't even want us to present something for them to discuss, some thing important and something that would not have hurt anyone to just talk about," he said. "The whole thing is just very disappointing to me." ■

A sampling of other reci-pie-entsr • Conservative commenta tor Ann Coulter (custard, 2004), speaking at the University of Arizona. • Alberta Premier Ralph Klein [banana cream, 2003), speaking at his annual Stampede break fast. • Former prime minister Jean Chrétien (whipped cream, 2000), in protest of his reluctance to regu late genetically modified food. • Former Human Resources Minister Pierre Pettigrew (cream, 1999), in protest of his stance on unemployment insurance. • Jesse Ventura, governor of Minnesota (coconut cream, 1999), in potest of his budget cuts to arts programs.

• San Francisco Mayor W illie Brown (cher',. 1999), in protest of !» policies on homelessnes. • Economist Milton Friedman (coconut cream 1998), at a conference on the privatization of educ ation. • Microsoft cofounder Bill Gates (cream, 1998), n Brussels. • local notables Roger Landry, president of a Presse (19 99 ), former Quebec premier Jacques Parizeau (1998), former Montreal mayor Pierre Bourque (1998), Alliance Quebec president W illiam Johnson (1998), Montreal Canadiens executive Serge Savard, and Bank of Montreal chief executr. officer Matthew Barrett.

SOURCES: MOVEMENTBUIlDING.ORG, TECHSPOT.COM 1W IGGS.CO M , FARINA! .CO M , UNDERCURRENTS.ORi ■

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A chan ce a t your 15 minutes

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Is former prime minister Pierre Elliott Trudeau deserving of the 'The Greatest Canadian" moniker? CBC filmed part of a documentary in the Redpath Museum on Friday, inviting students to appear in the film as pro-Trudeau extras.

the mcgill tribune ] 23.11.04 | news

CAMPUS NEWS

S c ie n c e b e a ts Arts e-Business

Online recorded lectures next to nil for Arts students N A T A L IE E A R L

Final exams are looming, and as students are scrambling to get their notes in order and to understand the details of each lecture, Arts students are once again wishing they could obtain recordings c i any classes they may have missed. Science students have an advan tage over students in other faculties because they can find recordings of their lectures online, either through a W e b site called Courses Online, www.cool.mcgill.ca, or, more recently, through their W ebC T accounts. Recently, the Instructional M e d ia Services began offering the recording option to professors who teach courses in any of 1 1 campus classrooms listed on their W e b site. There are currently 4 9 such courses available, mainly in the faculties of Arts and Science. "Usually [setting up the account] is done at the beginning of the semes ter and it can be done the same day," said Blake Markle, who is in charge of this service. "It is pretty much automat ed." He said the setup is simple because the recording process uses the public address system that is already in place in each of these rooms. If the pro fessor speaks clearly into the micro phone, the entire lecture can be posted on the Internet for studens to access later that day. In addition, Courses Online offers recorded lectures for 1 1 Science cours es and one Nursing course, but no Arts claSses. This is because the site is organized by the O ffice for Science and Society. The service was originally created for-students in the W orld of Chemistry courses, which often cover large

amounts of material, including slides and visuals that are necessary to under standing each topic. "The idea was to allow students to be able to review the lectures at their leisure," said Dr. Joe Schwarcz, direc tor of the O ffice for Science and Society and a chemistry professor. Schwarcz and Society co founders Dr. Ariel Fenster and Dr. David Harpp teach the W orld of Chemistry courses as a team. They found that the course information was being dealt

course material. "The material is very fact-oriented and so much of it is visual, whereas in Arts courses that is not necessarily the case. For example, philosophy is more about the spoken word," he said. Having the spoken word record ed, however, can be helpful. Eren Bilgin, U1 Dietetics, is in PSYC 100, a recorded class. "The w ay [the professor] does the course, when you have the recorded audio, you have pretty much every

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with very quickly and the students “were behaving like secretaries" rather than understanding the material. "If they had a mechanism to review the lectures, it would allow stu dents to improve grades," said Schwarcz. M cG ill supports this idea, as the recording service is now being offered on a classroom basis. Markle said that there are 1 1 classrooms that enable this service, which is the only restriction that dictates whether this service can be offered. Even through the W ebCT service, however, the Arts faculty offers fewer on-line lectures than the Faculty of Science. Schwarcz believes that this is because of a difference in the type of

thing," he said. One of the few problems with the service is that students ask questions that the microphone does not pick up. "It can be annoying when there are questions, but he often repeats them back in to the microphone so that you have almost all of the lecture, Bilgin said. Some of the other courses that have offered this service include American Literature 1 and Symbol Systems and Ideologies, showing that some Arts courses do in fact record lec tures. Markle said that as the service becomes more widely known, more professors in every faculty will use it. "W e are expanding the service right now." ■

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R e m e m b e rin g a n d e d u c a tin g TransAction promotes awareness of trans issues X IA N G G U

Coinciding with the International Trans Day of Remembrance, the sec ond annual TransAction was held this weekend to address issues of violence against trans communities and to memorialize the victims. Jointly organized by M cG ill and Concordia groups, TransAction sought to raise public awareness about vari ous trans issues. "W e want to concentrate on strategies of survival in and across our communities," said Robin Taylor, a member of the M cG ill Trans/Gender Alliance and facilitator on Friday's speakers panel. "W e hope that the momentum generated by these events... will improve collaboration and shared action.” Four speakers each addressed a different issue, ranging from personal experiences to how to organize clubs and events on campus. Anais Zeledon of Project M ax shared her experiences and views on transsexuality and sex work. "I am speaking on behalf of sex workers," she said. "N ext time you see us, think about it before you start giving us bad looks or make any kind of comments, because you don't know

why we're here." Aboriginal speaker Denise David spoke about her people, roots, and personal identity. "The more and more I draw on my inner spirit, the more and more I respect both sides [of my spirit], she said. "The more and more I respect my spirituality... the more and more I get rid of the anger and hate." The ensuing discussion raised doubts about the reach of universityorganized events. Organizers said they postered across the city to pro mote the event in an attempt to extend its reach beyond university grounds. Devin Butler Burke, a former M cG ill student, said that it is the responsibility of university students to reach out to critical communities. Sometimes simply offering time and understanding is enough, he said. "I think it is really basic and important that people in university can break out of their bubbles of activism or academia or whatnot," he said. "For mé it's been scary to make that step—to call up an organization and put myself out there and to be honest about where I'm coming from and what I don't know, and to not be afraid to make mistakes." TransAction was organized by a

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STUDENT NEWS

CAMPUS NEWS

FEUQ: Give us our m oney back, Charest! Student group lobbies for return o f $103-m illion

Sexual Assault centre calls on others to take up anti-violence cam paign

COURTENAY ADAM S

Student activists hoping the province would reverse $ 103-million in recent cuts to financial aid left this weekend's Liberal Party convention dis appointed. The convention was held two weeks after la Fédération étudiante uni versitaire du Québec organized a 12,000-strong student protest against cuts to the grants and loans program. From Friday to Sunday, several FEUQ representatives attended the conven tion, specifically to discuss the cuts with provincial Liberal party delegates, including members of the National Assembly. FEUQ also met with representa tives from the Liberal Youth Commission to receive updates on Resolution Two, the commissions proposed policy plan. The resolution demanded that the Quebec government reinvest all $ 103million in the next budget. At the con vention, however, Education Minister Pierre Reid modified the proposal to more vaguely read "reinvest massive ly." Convention delegates subsequent ly adopted the resolution. "W e're obviously very upset that the minister showed a complete lack of courage on this issue, and the youth wing showed no backbone by allov^ ing their proposition to be completely watered down," said N ick Vikander,

Passing the torch

SEPAND TE H R A N !

VLADIMIR EREMIN

Education Minister Pierre Reid neutralized the Liberal Youth Commission. FEUQ vice-president {university affairs). Vikander said that Charest's plan is unacceptable. "They basically cut one third of the budget for grants. That's $ 103-mil lion in extra debt for the poor students of Quebec," he said, adding that FEUQ members are not alone in their battle against the budget. Several Students' Society members also attend ed the function. Daniel Friedlaender, SSMU vicepresident (community and govern ment), said he was anxious for money to be reintroduced into the system, as addressed in the Youth Commission's resolution. "The cuts hurt the most disadvan taged students. This $ 103-million is directly hurting the people w ho are the

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most vulnerable w ho try to get an edu cation in Q uebec," he said. "W e think that this money should be put back in right aw ay to ensure that access to education in Quebec isn't further ham pered." Friedlaender said that having the money rerouted back to where it came from would not be enough. "In my opinion, this is still not suf ficient," he said. "W e need a much more open and generous financial aid system." Vikander is not going to back down from the ultimate goal any time soon. "The campaign is going to have to continue," he said, "and we're going to have to keep on increasing the pressure on the government." ■

Members of the Sexual Assault Centre of the M cG ill Students' Society have decided not to organize their tra ditional campaign against violence against women in the nope that more mainstream groups will take up the cause. The white ribbon cam paign began in 1991 when a handful of Canadian men decided to speak out against violence targeting women. W earing a white ribbon has since come to symbolize a male gesture of

"Men are not well represented in our volunteer body." —Kate Stinson, SACOMSS protest and solidarity in the face of vio lence and misogyny. SACO M SS has organized a white ribbon campaign for several ears. This year, however, SACOMSS as decided not to shoulder the responsibility. "The cam paigns mandate is to facilitate social change by men, as it is a campaign of men to end men's violence against women. This is a mandate that SACOMSS supports,

but not one that w e can fulfill, as men are not well represented in our volun teer body," said Kate Stinson, co-coor dinator of SACOMSS. ‘ SACOMSS volunteers hope that other groups on campus, notably ones with male members, will take on the task of organizing the white ribbon campaign this year. During the cam paign, men demonstrate their opposi tion to gender violence by pinning the white ribbon on others. "W e want to encourage student societies, clubs, services, and other groups on campus to get involved in this important cam paign," Stinson said. For those who choose to do so, the white ribbon is worn between November 2 5 , the International Day for the Eradication of Violence Against W omen, and December 6, Canada's National Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence Against Women. December 6 is also the anniver sary of the 1 9 8 9 Ecole polytechnique shooting, in which a lone gunman murdered 14 female students on the basis of their sex. SACOMSS will still hold its annual memorial service in the Birks Chapel. ■ Contact SACOMSS at 3982 7 5 1 , 3 9 8 -8 5 0 0 (helplineI, or at sacomss@yahoo. ca

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the mcgill tribune |23.11.04 | news

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In addition to organizing protests, la FEUQ gets in the provincial government's face. interventions that are in English." ith recent government cuts to student loans SSMU lost its unique status, however, when the and bursaries, and more education battles Concordia Student Union joined FEUQ last week. with the provincial government ahead, the Friedlander hopes that CSU's entry into the associa role of la Fédération étudiante universitaire du tion will change the dynamic slightly. He said that Québec is increasingly coming under the spotlight. Concordia and M cG ill have similar backgrounds Founded in 1 9 89 in response to a substantial and goals that could lead to a furthering of SSMU's tuition hike, FEUQ's mandate is to "defend the rights policy recommendations. and interests of students with the governments and CSU Vice-President Internal Relations Melissa the other actors of the education system. The Gruber agreed. Students Society is currently a member. "O ne thing w e definitely have in common with Nick Vikander, FEUQ vice-president (university SSMU is the international student tuition issue," she affairs) and a former Students' Society executive, said. "The CSU's membership in FEUQ will proba said that it is a marriage of involvement at the provin bly give them more incentive to push to keep it from cial and federal levels that makes FEUQ an asset to being privatized." students everywhere. CSU joined FEUQ partly because its member "Because education is a provincial jurisdiction, ship is already so large, Gruber said. most of the important decisions are made by the "Considering all the cuts that the government is Quebec government," he said, referring to tuition making right now to education, it just makes sense fee levels, the Quebec financial aid system, and overall university funding. Strong provincial lobbying is important because Quebec's "We are at a critical time in the student movement in Ministry of Education is a direct Quebec. FEUQ will have to evolve and adapt in order target, he said, adding that to stay the relevant and credible actor that it is." although no similar department —SSMU Vice-President (Community exists in the federal government, and Government) Daniel Friedlaender involvement at that level is also imperative. Daniel Friedlaender, SSMU to have a united student movement in Quebec." vice-president (community and government) said that Vikander stressed the importance of student SSMU membership is worth the annual membership unity to produce results. Fee because of FEUQ's influence with the Quebec "Quebec is the province where the student government. movement is the most united, and that helps FEUQ "FEUQ is a provincial student lobby associa get concrete results for students," he said. "Looking tion representing over 1 7 0 ,0 0 0 students in at our 15th anniversary, you see that FEUQ is get Quebec," he said. "As members, we have a ting more and more representative—English institu stronger voice in provincial matters relating to educa tions, French institutions, in both big and small tion, and we are also able to get our positions sup cities—and students must remain united to be effec ported by many other groups." tive." Vikander underscored that sentiment. Friedlander agreed. "As one of the larger student associations in "W e are at a critical time in the student move Quebec, SSMU plays an important role in FEUQ," ment in Quebec. FEUQ will have to evolve and he said. "During the FEUQ congresses that bring adapt in order to stay the relevant and credible actor together all the different student associations through that it is," he said. "SSMU and other members of out Q uebec... about six times per year, SSMU has FEUQ will be bringing many policies and proposals a large number of votes that can influence FEUQ's to the table in order to renew and re-energize positions and our campaign plans." FEUQ. W e believe that FEUQ can continue to be a Until recently, SSMU represented the only key actor in Quebec." English-language university among mostly francoph SSMU will host a gala and congress in cele one schools. bration of FEUQ's 15th anniversary from Friday to "SSMU representatives have to make the effort Sunday. ■ to take part in meetings that occur mostly in French,"

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news | 23.11.04 | the mcgill tribune

ANGLES

D o o m s d a y sce n a rio s ju st in tim e fo r finals Putin's love affair with the bom b REBECCA G RABER

EU-Canada Young Journalist Award Students are invited to enter by February 11,2005

"W e are not just carrying out research and missile tests o f new nuclear missile systems, l.am confident that they w ill be commis sioned in the next few years. And no other nuclear power will have

★

such developed systems in the next few years."

* ★

—Russian President Vladimir Putin at the annual Defence Ministry meeting in Moscow, November 17, The M oscow Times ttention all Cold W ar kooks: there be some strange goings-on, and they have nothing to do with the borscht sitting heavily in my tummy. Lately I've been eying Russian President Vladimir Putin—partly because my inter nal narrative insists on pro nouncing his surname "poutine" and I am trying to re-train it. But mostly my surveillance is due to the increasingly anti dem ocratic nature o f. the Russian presidency. All televi sion channels are now govern ment-operated and the remain ing independent press is under threat. Earlier this year Putin dis missed his prime minister and cabinet in efforts to consolidate his power. N o w Putin has announced that the country w ill be develop ing new nuclear missile systems that would overwhelm those of any existing nuclear stash. Russia is developing maneuverable land- and seabased ballistic missiles that could elude missile defence sys tems, including the planned US system, and carry up to 10 nuclear warheads, weighing a total of four tons. The technolo gy is based upon the Topol ground-based intercontinental ballistic missile that Russia already possesses. Putin has vaguely cited international terrorism as his motivation — presumably he means*“ from Chechen rebels, though nukes would be of little use in fighting this particular threat. The move instead seems to reflect the beliefs of Russian mil

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itary planners w ho consider parity with the United States a priority. The recent Beslan ele mentary school siege in the Northern Caucasus provides a potent emotional backdrop to this supposed precaution against terrorism. I'm hardly predicting a return to Soviet Russia, but the world should be a tad con cerned that Putin, with his authoritarian tendencies, is developing new forms of nukes. One should also question the logic of a world wherein the US and Russia can mutually pledge to substantially reduce their nuclear stashes, even as each continues to develop new and more dangerous nuclear technologies. Hey, w e can trash the old bombs—we're making even better ones! And getting erections in the process! Putin's announcement shouldn't encourage. Prime Minister Paul Martin to sign up for US President G eorge W . Bush's inane missile system when the North American lead ers meet this w eek—no, sir. W hile C anada doesn't have the clout needed to dissuade Putin, Martin has recently man aged to extract a commitment to human rights from the Russians—not an insignificant accomplishment. Canada could take this opportunity to force a re-evaluation of nuclear technology's role in the w o rld —starting with two of the greatest nuclear powers. In the meantime, I'm going down to my nuclear bunker to warm up some poutine and study for exams. You w on't catch me unprepared. ■

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the mcgill tribune [23.11.04 | news

U p to S p e e d rpfoy Day» cdcbfi»’ f W lU A l i i

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NEWS

Louisiana police found thousands of US dol-

* fk • I a i J A < lars in st° len cas^ woven into a beaver's dam. They '*■ % * 1L said the beavers had not torn any of the bills. • The ItV W est Vancouver district council is considering amending a business licence by-law to make excessive odours an . * j offence after complaints of restaurant odours from nearby |B M M | r residents. However, councillor Rod Day assures the proposed ts c t^ te $ 10 ,0 0 0 fine will only be applied in cases in which there is a * * I written complaint. • If you were wondering why Canadians ittly have a reputation for being sweet, naïve, and not very smart, wonder no more. Prime Minister Paul Martin is considering an offi 9 ttp t cial visit with Libyan dictator Muammar Q addafi, who has been tak ing steps to gain international approval. Martin seems to have for gotten that Q addafi stands accused of harbouring terrorists, mistreat wn ing his people, and developing the weapons of mass destruction other is* leaders thought were in Iraq. • M cG ill researchers say that the birth control pill might improve joint flexibility, making female athletes on the pill less susceptible to knee injuries and ligament tears. • Peruvian if police discovered US$1 7 .5-million worth of cocaine hidden in frozen squid bound for M exico and the US • A woman in N e w Zealand start r ed breastfeeding her puppy when her infant daughter stopped taking ¥ her milk. • O ntario Premier Dalton M cGuinty bet British Columbia Premier Gordon Campbell 2 0 pounds of O ntario beef against the same amount of BC beef that the Toronto Argonauts would win the G rey Cup jjt against the BC Lions. Looks like McGuinty will be treated to some fine ’fr> BC steak • On-line trading giant eBay pulled a lO year-old grilled cheese sandwich its owner claims bears the image of the Virgin Mary, saying that it does not allow items that are intended as jokes. It later fc allowed bidding to resume on the sandwich, which the owner says has not grown any mold. • Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan residents disi l , > covered that their sleepy prairie town might not be so sleepy after all. Prohibition-era crime ringleader Al Capone is thought to have p u ■- f operated from underground tunnels in the town, and for the past Ü I? f t * few years, Moose Jaw has been taking advantage of this as a tourist draw. • A drug originally tested to combat obesity and smoking may help recovering drug abusers stay on the wagon, ’ - iÏaccording to scientists. • Thirty-three years after she had her » 1 .M tubes tied, a 59-year-old great-grandmother from G eorgia r WB f (^ e state, not the country) is expecting twins. ■

BRIEFS Linguistics building robbed

The Linguistics building on avenue Docteur Penfield was broken into recently and equipment was stolen from two offices. The break-in occurred sometime last weekend, and was discovered last M onday morning. The thieves stole computers from two offices, and there were also marks on doors indicating unsuccessful attempts to break into other offices. Entry into the building is controlled by key-card access during the weekends, and it was not immediately clear how the thieves got past security. "I don't believe w e know how they got into the build ing... N o bo dy saw or heard anything," said Lydia W hite, chair of the Linguistics department. In the wake of the robbery, security has been beefed up. "W e're going to have extra strong locks put on," W hite said. —James Gotowiec

One more vice-principal Janyne M . Hodder has joined the university adminis tration as the first vice-principal governmental and inter-insti tutional affairs. The position entails interacting with the city of Montreal, the provincial government, and other post-sec ondary institutions with the aim to build partnerships and strengthen working relationships. For the past nine years, Hodder has been principal of Bishop's University, and before that, she held the post of associate deputy minister at the Quebec Ministry of Education. Although she is coming to M cG ill from.Bishop's, Hodder is not on foreign ground, having earned her B.A. and M .A . at M cG ill. Nam ed to the post over the summer, Hodder official ly joined the administrative staff on November 1. Her goals are to create an overall strategy toward government, and to not just lobby, but also shape public policy in regard to education, she said. Hodder is the second new vice-princippl to be named in the past year, bringing the total number of vice-principals to seven. —Jay Pale/a

is jtt&I 1 l i tf t , L , »i ifftn t i ■ " , I A ft» m C

Sources: The Globe and Mail, The N e w York Times, M cG ill Newswire, The Vancouver Sun, www.cnn.com.

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opinion

^ th in k Factory

Blame Chrétien JAM ES S C A R F O N E

The three SSMUooges "W e re not normal people; we're morons" —Curly o f the Three Stooges

e llo ... hello... HELLO! W elcom e to today's Three Stooges short, featuring Generic Students' Society Councillor as Larry, SSMU Vice-President (Community and Government) Daniel Friedlaender as Curly, and concerned pie-thrower Lazar Konforti as M oe. Special guest star Detached Student. The scene is a typical SSMU council meeting, Thursday at 6pm in the Shatner building. [Detached Student walks in.] DETACHED STUDENT: Hi. In the past year or so we've had four presidential elections, two presidential resignations, and this building was shut down for 24 hours. You guys are looking pretty absurd. So I thought I'd watch you in action in the hope that you'll prove me wrong. LARRY: Soitenly. CURLY So as I was saying, the Q uebec government has no plans to reinvest in post-secondary education. W e may need to rethink our lobbying strategy. [M oe skulks in, wearing a toque and scarf to disguise himself. He pulls a shaving-cream pie from behind his back, reaches around Curly and pies him in the face.] MO E: Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk. This is for reversing 10 years of SSMU tuition policy. [M aking a slick getaway, M oe runs toward the win dow and tries to jump out, but the w indow is barred, and he bangs his head instead.] CURLY: I'll show you! [Curly readies himself with a pie, but before he can throw it, M o e creams him again. Repeat several times. Curly finally catches on and pies himself in the face, then sticks his tongue out at M oe. M oe prompt ly hurls another one at him.] MO E: I'm making a statement. I disagree with what you have to say, so I'm taking you down a peg, and

drawing attention to my cause in the process. CURLY: But you haven't even heard what I have to say yet. And a pie? Really? It's been done to death. M O E [sneering]: So why don't you pass a motion about it? LARRY: I second that. CURLY: M oe, your shoe's untied. [W hen M oe looks down, Curly punches him in the jaw.] [M oe slaps Curly, as Larry looks on bemusedly.] [Curly slaps M oe.] [M oe slaps Curly.] [Curly slaps M oe .] [M oe slaps Larry.] DETACHED STUDENT: This is not how grownups behave! Are you really the best people to represent me to the government? M O E: Are we! CURLY: Are we! LARRY: Are we? [M oe and Curly turn to stare angrily at Larry, but crash their heads together. M oe pokes Larry in the eyes.] CURLY: All right, you knuckleheads. University funding is a serious issue that requires unconventional solu tions and calm, reasoned debate. N ow , what can w e do to persuade the province to return the $ 103million in financial aid cuts? LARRY: I got it! I got it! MO E: W hat? LARRY: A terrific headache! DETACHED STUDENT: Don't w e all. Final scorecard Eye pokes: 1 Head bonks: 1 Face slaps: 5 Pastries thrown: Lost count Unimpressed students: 1 8 ,0 0 0 . ■

e need not explain Carolyn Parrish's uproarious remarks the past cou ple of years. Indeed, they have disgraced her parly, her country, and the Prime Minister, who finally had enough of her tirades and decid ed to give her the boot. Parrish's comments are not under scrutiny solely because of their content, but because of the environment in which she was allowed to spew out such nonsense. She couldn't have put it more perfectly when she told the CBC that "it's not the same party we had even two years ago” under former PM Jean Chrétien. W e all remember this arrogant dimwit—a man who secured his legacy in his final months by disapproving an unpopular war, ratifying the Kyoto protocol, putting the decriminalization of marijuana into the limelight, began the process of the legalization of gay marriage, and all of this for the wrong reason: countering those infuriating Americans by showing them we're different. W hy not accomplish these goals in the previous 10 years of Liberal dom ination? Little wonder why US President George W . Bush rejected numerous invitations to Canada. W ho would want to shake the hand of a phony? Chrétiens administration certainly did not hide its hatred' of the Bush W hite House, calling the President a "moron" and actively supporting an Al Gore win in the 2 0 0 0 election. This deplorable, undiplomatic attitude put a black eye on Canada-US relations and jeopardized further discussion on important issues such as softwood lumber and the beef industry. I'm sure the

I hardly think John A. Macdonald and the Fathers of Confederation would deem the nationally televised stomping on presidential effigies an effective form of gov ernance. Canadian companies and farmers that are going bankrupt because of this childish rift are cursing at the w ay Ottawa is handling these debates. Chrétien also bred a group of loudmouth twits who now rival those from the Bloc Québécois. Parrish is the new Sheila Copps who was the new Brian Tobin. Even at their finest, Crouton's loyalists revealed inappropriate stances with not-so-impeccable timing. The beauty of freedom of speech, as these folks would like Canadians to believe, is that you can pipe up your backbencher voice no matter how ridiculous your words and actions may be. Don't worry about endangering the country's relationship with other nations so long as you have something important to contribute, they argue. I hardly think John A. Macdonald and the Fathers of Confederation would .deem the nationally tele vised stomping on presidential effigies an effective form of governance. The worst part about Chrétien is the w ay he departed, leaving Paul Martin with a huge mess to clean up. Now, the current PM has to deal with renegade MPs who shoot off their mouths everytime Bush comes up in conver sation which was so poorly handled in the previous administration that Martin now looks like the devil to bleeding-heart liberal freedom of speech advocates. Throughout the tumult, he must also be a strong leader while work ing with a minority government—something he owes to Chrétien as well. The former PM and longtime liar pulled a Ronald Reagan and explained that he didn't know the details regarding the sponsorship scandal. Sure, buddy, and Clinton wasn't aware that Monica was under his desk. It is not surprising that the folks in the Chrétien bloc, as loyal to each other as Eastern European fig ure skating judges, are reacting the way they are over the new regime Like corrupt companies that have to undergo major renovations to repair the dam ages caused by previous executives, new leaders are entitled to conduct affairs however they see fit, even if that means ruffling a few feathers to weed out the inadequacies of parliament. Parrish may wish for the good old days of rampant idiocy, but Prime Minister Martin has put his foot down, forever crush ing whatever legacy the Crouton left behind. ■

I know something you don't know LA U R A SABA ey, can you keep a secret? I'll tell you if you promise not to tell the person w ho told me that I blabbed. You can tell anyone you want, as long as everyone knows not to tell it was me who opened my big mouth. Think back to the last time you actually kept a secret and told absolutely no one, not even your mother, significant others, or cat. If you don't remember, you are not alone. W e seem to have forgotten how important it is not to betray someone's con fidence. Instead, we put a substantial amount of effort into mak-

Think back to the last time you actually kept a secret and told absolutely no one, not even your mother, sig nificant other, or cat. ing it look like w e can restrain ourselves from shooting our mouths off. Keeping a secret no longer entails not telling a soul about your friend David's recent foray into the controlled substance industry. W h a t it really means is that you will tell somebody, or

everybody, but you will do your best to ensure that the person who told you never finds out you publicized David's double life. G one are the good old days when you only spilled a damning secret when you were drunk. H ow did w e get to a point where 10 people in a room will know that Meredith tapdanced topless on the table at a party they weren't even at? And why will only nine of them know that they know? If Meredith's shirtless episode had no impact whatsoever on the 10 people's lives, how did it get out there in the first place? Our need to seem interesting-has gotten out of hand. Nothing livens up an awkward conversation with a co-worker like a story about the kinky sex life of someone else you work with. Sometimes you find yourself stuck having coffee with a posse member with whom you never really had much in com mon. W hen the conversation inevitably turns to the tangled fam ily life of another clique member, you suddenly have a common ground, and your coffee date from Hell becomes a bonding exercise. All the while, it wouldn't do to be caught being an unwor thy friend or a shameless gossip, so when we're done picking

apart people whose lives are none of our business, w e make absolutely sure that it doesn't get around that w e can't be trust ed. If we can't keep from yapping about each other, what if we all stopped trying to keep our personal lives private? Nobody likes to be the subject of gossip, but w e all ask that people stay out of our business even as w e can't seem to stop sticking our noses in theirs. W e make sure to ask that people keep our secrets when w e know w e won't keep theirs. So maybe we can extend the same courtesy to the people w e gab about and give them something to dissect when we're not around. . Or, instead of trying to be interesting by telling everybody we know everything we know, maybe w e can start actually talk ing to each other. Whether it's a shared interest in collecting shower caps ôr vehemently opposed views on the nutritional value of fried eggplants, there's always a place to start when you want to break the awkward silence. And the best part? It does not have to involve what a slut Amy was behaving like at St-Sulpice on Friday or whether or not Kevin told his brother he boinked his girlfriend. ■

The

IVlcGill Tribune

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Natalie Fletcher

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read the news today, oh boy... well, I just had to laugh... he blew his mind out in a car." Poetic oracles of an age where old orders once again arrived at uncertain crossroads, John and Sir Paul artfully foresaw a world in which the stimulatory atmosphere of the nascent information/consumer age would lead to an environment chronically under duress. Now, in a time when one must inte grate meaning from a multitude of directions at lev els heretofore unknown in our history, time-honoured ways of emotional response ironically find them selves in existential crisis as well. The growing sur realism engendered by the ripple effects of Western society threatens to cross the Rubicon into perma nence, as associations first seen loosened on the canvasses of Dali and Magritte become less like artistic commentary than mirrors reflecting the con fused and overwhelmed state of the societal soul. The perception that economic prosperity is the greatest end towards which to direct one’s life has become so well woven into societal fabric that we no longer notice its harmful presence. Much like mil itaries created to defend ideologies, consumerism has been delegated to guard the paradigm, encouraging citizens to continue buying often superfluous items. The desire to do so is brought about by creating artificial needs, coupling emotion and self-worth with product attainment through

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Jennifer Jett

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BRETT SCHREWE

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the mcgill tribune | 23.11.04 | opinion

Deconstructing the facade

increasingly intense advertising. Further, novelty and the encouraging of rapid turnover in consum ables have wreaked havoc on our attention span and commitment. The above appears completely irrelevant to the topic at hand, until w e realize that how we get our information about the world is intimately wrapped up in the same line of thought processing; news has never before been so in touch with its own definition. Opening the BBC News W eb site, we are bombarded with stories about suffering or injustice across the globe more often than not. W e are given paragraphs on Darfur, the HIV pandem ic, beheadings, the heat waves sweeping France, and the melting of the Matterhorn. The next day, the slate of articles has largely changed, from stories of terrorist takeovers of grade schools to Iran’s nuclear desires. The song remains the same, but the lyrics change at incredibly fast rates. And, while we wish to keep up with events as they seem to hold some sort of ramifications for our own lives, there seem to be too many tracks on the CD to really focus and listen. W e are by nature a compassionate people. However, this innate sense can be overloaded, and we can not only become easily blinded to the amount of suffering before us but also rendered immobile by its sheer enormity. W hile the desecra-

tion of four Western contractors prompted a quick reaction that culminated in the first siege of Fallujdh and the beheading of Nicolas Berg provoked an international outcry, the everyday litany of kidnap pings, car bombings, and draconian measures of security forces no longer seem to generate anything more than a shake of the head and a click to the next story. As it stands, vve have access to all kinds of suf fering and not very much time to form meaning from it before we are told of another war that distracts our attention, having been conditioned by the whims of the consumer culture to preferentially seek out and pay attention to the new. Thus, we are forced to put our niptural responses of anger at injus tice and compassion for the hurting on the backburner while we learn about yet another nexus of pain. The danger inherent in all of this is that with out the brake of getting involved, the cycle of suffer ing spins unchecked and threatens permanent psy chological damage to us as a group. Perhaps, then, before our only recourse of dealing with the senseless pain of others is by senseless laughing, we should follow the wisdom of Oscar Romero— "we cannot do everything, and there is a certain liberation in that"—and take the steps to help whom we can while concurrently not falling prey to seeking the news for the sake of the new. ■

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kay, I'm not really Canadian, but... I'm currently in the process of filling in appli cation forms for Canadian citizenship, so I've been reflecting a lot on Canadian identi ty. This is probably what motivated me to take a look at Harvard Professor Samuel P. Huntington's new book W h o Are We? The Challenges to America's National Identity. The author explores the question of what it means to be American today. W hile the book's rhetoric tempted me to just dismiss it as anti-immi grant or WASP-chauvinist, it definitely got think ing about what it means to be Canadian. Huntington's big point seems to me to be that one must put being American before anything else, if one is to be American at all. (He delights in the fact that 4 5 per cent of respon dents to a survey said that being American is the most important thing in their lives.) His thesis really puts into relief a substantive idea of patriotism that I find makes much more sense: Canadian patriotism isn't about Canada being the most important thing in life. This is in large part w hy I'm happy to become Canadian: as the child of Indian parents, born and raised in Nigeria, I w ill be proud to be a loyal Canadian, but I'm glad I w on't be expected to make being Canadian the most important thing in my life.

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Publisher Chad Ronalds

However, apart from this one substantive insight, the rest of my insights had more to do with the lack of substance in modern Canadian identity. For Huntington, national identity is articulat ed by a "creed." The American creed—the prod uct of the distinct Anglo-Protestant culture of the founding settlers o f America — is apparently exemplified by the Declaration of Independence. W h a t is the Canadian creed? In the minds of the Fathers of Confederation, the creed seems to be centred on loyalty to institutions, the equal ity of the provinces, and being British. Not English, but British—Sir John A. M acdonald, for example, was of Scottish stock and proud of it— because the Fathers believed that the Scottish, French, and all Canadians were just as British as the English were. The British North America Act exemplifies this creed, which is why it's worrying to see Canada's sense of the BNA Act's impor tance wither, even as our historical emblems are rendered irrelevant. I'm not saying w e have to think of the creed as being completely static, but I think that it's absolutely necessary that w e not lose sight of its importance in order to get a sense of who w e are. Pierre Trudeau, probably the last prime minister with a strong vision for Canada, had a tremendous sense of this creed—he rooted

his vision of the Charter of Rights and Freedoms in the foundation of the BNA Act. Today on the other hand, it's much too easy to be "Not-America." Sure, Paul Martin says things like "Canadians are not anti-American. W e are pro-Canadian," in response to questions from Conservatives about American-hating and former Liberal MP Carolyn Parrish, but Martin has notoriously failed to articulate any part of what he thinks it means to be Canadian. Being "N ot-Am erican" was around _ at Confederation too, but it was secondary to the substantive ideas of the Fathers of Confederation; it certainly wasn't conceived merely in the sarcas tic, superior w ay that is so popular today. O f course, there's a whole subset of Canada that takes pride in the notion that not being able to articulate what being Canadian means is pre cisely what it means to be Canadian; as ridicu lous as it is to even entertain this sort of reason ing, it's apparently what defines Canada. Ultimately, I don't pretend to know exactly what Canadian identity is; perhaps I'll have the seeds of an answer by the time I take my oath of citizenship. But even if I don't, I'm sure as hell not going to settle for, "I don't know what it is, but there's got to be something valuable about it." And nobody should. ■

C ollaborators

Courtenay Adams, Rachel Bâcher, M ike Bick, Dave Brodkey, Narvan Bouzari, Susan Cooke, Kira Costanza, Simone Cruickshank, Kim D'Souza, Charlton R. Dwight, Natalie Earl,Hilary Elkins, Vladimir Eremin, Jospeh Gilgoff, James G otowiec, Xiang Gu, Ricki Gurwitz, Emily Harris, Cleve Higgins, Dany Horovitz, G racia Jalea, Seema Jethalal, Cristina Markham, Judy Murphy, Danny Nguyen , Jay Paleja, Thomas Pajliarulo, Brett Schrewe, Clara Schwarz, Julia Shonfield, Elisha Siegel, Sepand Tehrani

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Editorial. Shatner University Centre, Suite

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Throw pie guy in jail The events that transpired Thursday night at the SSMU Council meeting were absolutely abominable. Upon hearing that Vice-President (Community and Government) Daniel Friedlaender was assaulted by being pied in the face and that nobody responded quickly against the situation, my arms went up in the air. This is not about the ideas espoused by the VP, nor is this about your agreement or disagreement with such ideas. This is about respect and I have none to give these days. I hope that, like Christopher Peter Geoghegan or Evan W a d e Brown, some one will be slapped with a 3 0 d a y jail senfence. I once was very proud about being a member of this diverse student body. Yet after reading letters that associate M cG ill IDaily contributors to the likes of the KKK and the Nazis, and after hearing com

plaints about electoral acclamations from cowards like pie throwers who choose not to step up to the plate of being a SSMU executive, I am mortified by the narrow minded actions by some of "McGill's finest." Undoubtedly, the (shaving) cream of the pie was too much. M cG ill Daily, you were right about one thing: I am angry and bitter, not because of what I have done dur ing my time here, but because I held too much respect for students who refrain from according each other with a fundamental level of courtesy and respect. —Vivian K. Choy, U3 Environment/Sociology Let them stump I completely disagree with Noah Scheinman in his bashing of Curt Schilling for stumping for George W . Bush (Shilling for Busn less than heroic—09.1 1.04). Countless actors, musicians, and athletes

have not only endorsed, but gone on the | | stump to promote politicians. Bruce Springsteen brought John Kerry his biggest audience during the campaign with a con cert held in his honour Does this make the | | Boss less of a man because he used his popularity to gain favour for his preferred candidate? Kerry tried to play the Red Sox card |j too, with references to the team during | | speeches and in the debates. The Republicans just did a better job. I think the Republicans play the political game with | | genius. They're strong both on the offensive | | and on the defensive. I'm not a Republican and I'm not even a Red Sox fan, but I think it's shortsighted and another example of lib eral whining to criticize an admirable athlete for using his popularity for political sway. —M M Caldwell, U2 Political Science/Cultural Studies | |

collaboration with the Tribune Publication Society. All submissions, including letters, Dispatch Box, Parry The M cG ill Tribune is an editorially autonomous newspaper published by the Students' Society of McGill University, in i

lO opinion j 23.11.04 | the mcgill tribune The Dose

4» Intellectual Snob vs. Pop Enthusiast Copy editor has bouts with multiple minds SAM C O FFM A N

Sam the Snob I went to the cinema the other day and was met with quite an alarming spectacle. In aur theatre, showing I Heart Huckabees, a charming yet sagacious study on the excess es of our quiescent First W orld core, were sealed no more than five individuals, each of whom appeared to be separate from the common mainstream cultural definition. Before the theatre opposite was a long queue awaiting a screening of National Treasure, the latest Hollywood factory ordure designed merely to appeal to peoples fasci nation with violence and bloodshed, and interesting only in its ability to play upon their blind and uncomprehending brainlessness. The experience was an unwelcome reminder of the overarching stupidity of our culture.

Sam the Dud

You "intellectual" snobs make me sick, with your fancy words for simple ideas and your uncompassianate observations and your predictable preference for things that most people don't like. You don't even give pop stuff a chance If you did, you would find that there is a wealth of material to ana lyze in "brainless" movies, not only in the art5y-fartsy flicks that you love. W hat's more, they provide good, plain, old-fashioned fun, something that you could clearly use more of in your banal and unexciting lifestyle.

Sam the Snob That's going a bit too far, don't you think? M y lifestyle is far from banal. I have not yet had the pleasure of witnessing any stirrings of brain activity within these popular films that you speak of, and as for "fun," apes can have fun throwing bananas at each other, but that does not mean this activ ity is worthy of a superior intellectual being such as myself (You, however, may find great amusement in this sport; I suggest you try it.) You stick to your preferences and I'll stick to mine; I suppose if the masses can't be enlightened, they might as w ell be kept docile. ■

Write for oped! W e n eeed you. G o ffm an 's m an y p ersonalities a re running out! A cccck ! E x a m s schexam s. You know you w an t to w rite a sin in e , selfindulgent rants. W h o doesn't?

oped@tribune.mcgill.ca

G ettin' o u t while th e gettins' g o o d ELISHA SIEGEL

elis na.siegel@ mail.mcgill.ca

aybe I've listened to College Dropout too many times, but I have serious doubts about the value of higher educa tion. In my humble opinion, most of what we learn in university amounts to a steaming pile of horse shit. They teach you things you don't need to know and skip over all the essentials. I don't care about Estonia's free trade policies. I want to know how to get through a semester without spending all my money on booze and cheap women. I want to learn how to sleep my w ay to the top of the corporate ladder. I want to get high marks for important things like beer drinking and my freakish knowledge of M C Hammer, not for "demonstrating my understanding of the materi al." Siegel get serious, the McGillians cry. If you want doctors, you have to teach biology. Can you imagine life without engineers? W e'd all be riding donkeys to Ye O lde Haberdashery. Take aw ay the political science department and where would all the douchebags congregate? It would be chaos!

You're right. W e need these things. But you don't have to get all your credits sitting in the classroom. Cue the music. I'm making an impas sioned speech. G o study abroad! There, I said it. You can stop the music. As my roommate Dan says, "trussme." Seriously friends, whether it's a semester or a year, I highly recommend getting aw ay for a while. London, Melbourne, le i Aviv, wherever, it doesn't matter, there's a whole big world out there and you need to see it. W hen I was in my second year, I started to feel boxed in at M cG ill. I wasn't getting what I wanted out of the experience. There were only so many coursepacks I could read before I started considering various ways to dismember my bowels. I had to get the hell out of dodge. So I went through the motions and took a year off to study at Tel Aviv University. Needless to say, it was a fantastic time; fun parties, good friends, amazing food, and exotic women. Most importantly, I got a break from the M cG ill machine. It was a chance to rest some tired

bones that hadn't seen the outside of a classroom in 15 years. - Is it too cliché to say that the country became my classroom? W ell, fuck it. I don't care. I love clichés. Just slap my ass and call me "yer eus" because I was just tickled pink by the whole year: happier than a kid in a candy store, more excited than Michael Jackson at Wonderland, I played with a lot of heart and tried to do what ^ a s best for the team. ™ W hat can I say? Studying abroad rocked. It's hard to say why. In truth, it wasn't all that dif ferent from my life in Montreal. I still spent count less hours in front of the TV ripping bong hits and playing Playstation 2. I went out drinking on the weekends and put off'all my studying until the last minute. But there was something special about seeing the world from a 180degree angle. I got to witness things you only read about in textbooks and I got to see what happens when C N N stops rolling. I lost myself to a new life. The hard part is realizing that once gone, everything was still going on without me. ■

Neurotica

Culture shock CRISTINA M A R K H A M Cristina.ma rkham@ma i I. megi II .ca have always had a secret appreciation for action films—such a perfect amalgamation of gratuitous violence, transparent stock charac ters and partial nudity can only be found in these often overlooked masterpieces. M y personal favourite, though its hard to choose, is definitely Die Hard. John McClanes ability to single-hand edly save an entire airport from dozens of mili tary-trained terrorists is overshadowed only by his aptitude for one-liners. If only real cops made such witty rejoinders as, "W hat sets off the metal detectors first; the lead in your ass or the shit in your brains?" During a recent bout of midterm induced procrastination, I realized it had been months since I had seen Die Hard 2: Die Harder, so I headed out to Movieland to rectify the situation. Fifteen minutes later, the tape was in the VCR, and I was in Optimal Movie Viewing M o d e feet up, 'jammies on, bag of Oreos at arm's reach. Another 15 minutes later, I turned the

movie off, so livid that no amount of Oreos could pacify me. Despite my best attempts to stop, I had analyzed and deconstructed the movie to shreds, and was forced to recognize it for the piece of cinematic crap that it was. Die Hard had been ruined, and there was only one possible culprit: Cultural Studies. Over the course of my two and a half years as a Cultural Studies major, I have supposedly been learning h o w to "analyze the different forms of cultural expression and symbolic interaction, and of the various media through which these may be disseminated and transformed." W hat I have not learned is how to stop. Toothpaste com mercials, music videos, and even cereal boxes have all become "texts," begging me to deter mine their signifies and signifieds. Grocery shop ping now makes me uncomfortable, as my Freudian analysis of the produce section has determined that Provigo is obsessed with breasts and phalluses. And don't even think about turning

PgRK HUMOUR

Bring b a c k th e c a ta p u lt

on the TV—TLC's daytime programming is blatant ly an ad campaign for the patriarchy. M y obsession with analysis has become so severe that only the most tolerant of my friends can bear to watch a movie with me. Before the opening credits have finished rolling, I'm pointing out how the directors choice of font reflects the protagonist's views of the economy, or how the male lead's hairstyle is a metaphor for the objec tification of women. The responses range from. "Mmhmm" to "Cristina, this is Finding Nemo . . stop analyzing and eat your Glossettes." I've come to terms with the fact that this con dition is only going to get worse... by the time I graduate, I'll be lucky if I can reaa a cookie recipe without wondering what is really meant by "bake until done." M y only hope is that there is a lucrative future in cultural studies—a Marxist deconstruction of my last phone bill has deteimined that I'm broke. ■

o n 't kid yourself. Protest marches and pie throw ing are for sissies. They a in 't cuttin' it. It d id n 't w o rk on Chrétien, it isn't g o in g to w o rk on Friedlaender. And com e on, 1 0 ,0 0 0 stuaents protesting a id cuts... itjd id .n o th in g . N a d a . Z ip . Zilch. W e advocate a harsher, more attention-grabbing method o f protest. W e 're thinking catapulting and d ra w ing and quartering and d ro w n ing and hangings (the slo w Braveheart-like w ay) and Chinese w a te r torture and stonings and burnings a t the stake and crucifixion and im paling. O r some com bination thereof. W e w a n t to revert to the simple times o f medieval punishment in front o f hordes of people. Public execu tions are such m orale boosters. It sure m ade the Scots fight. Sit-ins are too '6 0 s . Burning effigies just leads to a lot o f straw scattered about. But a g o o d catapult sends the remains far, far aw ay. And just think of the photo ops! Really, if w e lined up Charest, Bryan, and Parrish and said, "G o back on your policies o r w e w ill stone yo u !", o f course they'd give in. N o questions asked O th e rw ise ... hem... bring out yer de ad . Those medieval thinkers had some g o o d ideas for d e aling w ith offenders. The rack, to be situated on M c G ill C o lle g e and Sherbrooke for all our view ing pleasure, w o u ld be a great deterrent for administrators w h o think that their only source o f tuition are our pock ets. Just im agine w a lkin g b y a bound and g a g g e a vice princip al. C ra ba pples and c a b b a g e w o uld be provided for hurling, o f course. A nd really, if you are g o in g to protest, remember: you 're young, ana crim inal records d o n 't last forever. W e ll, not in this soft-hearted country anyw ay. ■

CHATTERBOX

campus

An activist in our midst Social Work's Shari Brotman

SI LHOUETTE

D ro p p in g th e stitch Knitting Knetwork rides the trend M IK E B IC K

emember that first baby blanket, knit by good old Aunt Fanny? Little did you know at the time the precision and dexterity that went into crafting that blanket. W hat once was a necessity during the W orld Wars and later considered a "granny" activity is now becoming trendy among younger generations. Aunt Fanny isn’t so boring and old-fashioned, after all. It is surprising how many people know how to knit because it is only now becoming more common to see peo ple knitting in public. The M cG ill Knitting Knetwork is a club founded on the idea of making knitting better known and bringing knitters and

DAVE BR O D K EY

Putting the needles to good use so mama w on't get mad.

people who would like to knit together in an environment where creativity and ideas can be shared. Closet knitters of all ages are coming out to show the world their craft, and they're not holding back. Although knitting is considered by many an elderly active ity, this stereotype can be blamed on second wave feminist movements. "Women in the '60s and '70s began to tie knitting to the home. It wasn't considered progressive," explains Abigale Miller, U3 Biochemistry, president and founder of the Knitting

Knetwork. "For our generation, knitting is not a symbol of sub mission." Quite the contrary, knitting is actually a trend among young people. The craft is even shared by celebrities like Sarah Jessica Parker'and Russell Crowe. The Knitting Knetwork recognizes knitting and other simi lar crafts as art forms because it is no longer necessary to hand knit clothing, although hand knit articles make great

gifts. "During the wars, knitting was a necessity, says Katherine Nadeau-Noel, U3 Arts student, VP communications for the Knetwork. "Knitters today have to enjoy their craft because knitting has become an expensive leisure activity." Aside from bringing knitters at M cG ill together, members of the Knetwork help to spread knitting "awareness" to the Montreal community. "Bar knitting," a concept introduced by the Knetwork, combines the desire to make knitting more known with the concept of knitting as a fashionable trend. It's not every day you see a group of people knitting sweaters in a bar room. "Bar knitting is a strange way to bring knitting to the pub lic eye," reflects Nadeau-Noel. "However, our experience with it was successful because our posters attracted not only M cG ill students, but members of the Montreal community as well." Knitting and the future The real focus çf the club is on communication and ideas. For the most part, members bring their own projects to meetings and share techniques. Recently, however, members of the Knetwork have been knitting quilt squares for a charity project involving Dans La Rue, an organization that helps homeless youth. "Our goal is to create a blanket out of knit squares to donate," explains Miller. "The good thing about knitting squares is that members of all levels can contribute." Members from the club also make weekly visits to a sen ior centre in Westmount, to bridge the gap between young and old knitters. W ith contribution from the Knitting Knetwork, knitting may become as trendy as Ugg Boots. "Knitting is more fashionable than ever in the States, says Nadeau-Noel. "Hopefully this'trend will spread and it will become bigger in Montreal." ■ The Knitting Knetwork will be at Blue Dog 13958 St-Laurent/ on Wednesday, November 24, for "Oops!... I Knitted Again," the club's bar knitting sequel. Check out www.ssmu.mcgill.ca/knitting.

My favourite aspect of Montreal is... that Montreal is the best city in Canada in which to live because of its mul ticultural, multilingual flavour. There is so much to explore, share, learn, and experience in this city which celebrates its diversity. Montreal is also a leader as a queer-friendly city and that is something to be real ly proud of. Oh yes and I also love the fact that in Montreal w e still find time to sit out on our balconies and talk with our neighbours... and help each other shovel out from under 10 feet of snowl The best part of my day is... w aking up my 10-year-old

DAVE BRODKEY

son in the morning,., or should I

say... having him wake me up! He starts every day singing and smiling and talk ing... its a great way to get up every day—even when I am tired and crabby! The School of Social W ork is unique because... McGill's School of Social W ork is a dynamic place. There are many people here, staff and students, who contribute to social change both locally and argund the world. W e have a long tradition of social activism, critical pedagogy, and the development of programs and clinics that provide really new and cutting-edge service. Project Interaction, the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and two-spirit initiative that I am involved with got off the ground thanks to the energy-and commitment of so many people. This proj ect is a first of its kind in social work schools in Canada and we could only achieve what we did because of the school's tradition of supporting unique ini tiatives. The hardest part of Social W ork is... when you make a commitment to working not only as an educator but as a social change agent you have to find ways to keep your balance, not get overwhelmed, and take one step at a time. It is very challenging to be involved in social change within a university context where power and privilege regulate relationships. Also the neo-liberal agenda which has driven cutbacks to social programs has made it much more difficult to be a progressive social worker today. Burnout is a real threat. I have found that building alliances with like-minded people is the thing that sustains me and my work. Queer and trans issues are important to Social W ork because... the mis sion of social work is to. create environments, institutions, and societies based upon equity, solidarity, and the respect of human rights. This requires, us as social workers to work against oppression and discrimination. Since queer people con tinue to face marginalization and discrimination, we social workers must see it as our responsibility to fight homophobia and transphobia in our midst. If one per son is not free then we are all not free! I do believe this. I got into social work because... I wandered around several departments before finding social work. In my second year of my undergraduate degree (BA) at M cG ill I happened upon a course in community organizing taught by Jim Torczyner. He spoke in class about social action, liberation struggles, community solidarity... I was totally hooked.and never looked back! M y favourite dessert is... anything with chocolate in it... yummy. —compiled by Cleve Higgins The complete interview with Professor Brotman can be found on-line at www.mcgilltribune.com.

STREETER

Helping out the homeless: How much are you willing to give?

tADRA SABA

Nicholas Sinoyannis, U 4 Biology. Do you give to the homeless? Occasionally, yes I do. [I give to] the most dedicated ones, people I see from time to time. Last February I was coming down rue Peel, and it was literal ly brutal... and there she was, that lady at Peel. There was no one on the road that day. The girl was playing her recorder and she didn't have a hat on or anything. It really shocked me to see that because she's been there for so long with the temperature changes, she lost proba bly a lot of sensitivity in her face. You see her there all the time, and you think they have places to go, but when you see someone who's there at this temperature, you wonder if they really believe that's their place Are your views on the homeless shaped by your parents or socie ty? I used to travel a lot to developing countries and Third W orld countries when I was young, and we saw [peo ple who were homeless because of physical disabilities].

Joann Dim itrakopoulos, U2 Biochemistry. Do you give to the homeless? if so, what do you g iv e money, food, clothing? Is there a limit? I would not give all the time, obviously. If I have some change to spare, I will. The clothing that doesn't fit us anymore, that we don't want any more, [my mother] gives it to church. I don't have a limit. It depends [on] how much I can afford to give. Have your views changed at all since com ing to McGill? Not really

Daina Carlisle, U1 Finance. Do you give to the home less? If so, what do you give? Once in a while. Very sel dom. In the Caribbean it used to be food, but here it's money. Usually just the change in my pocket, so that's about a dollar. Do you give more when it gets cold? Yeah, I think so. I feel sorry fc- them, because I'm cold, and they're cold, so they can at least buy some coffee. W hat is the homeless situation where you're from com pared to Montreal? They're the same everywhere. The only thing is, I know the homeless in the Caribbean bet ter because everyone knows everyone, so you know why they're in that situation. You know who to give to and who not to. Here you don't. Here they may not get the food, but at least they have the shelters to go to. In the Caribbean, there's only one shelter They re poorer here, for sure, because in Dominica, where I m from, you can go pick people’s food from their land, sell it if you want, eat it if you want.

Angela Schafer, UO Management. Do you give to the homeless? If so, what do you give? Through charities, but not on the street. [I give] money and time. I guess I give clothes, too. I don't really agree with sitting on the street with a cup. I give what I can, but I'm not going to make myself poor over it. Do you give more when it gets cold? N o Are your views on the homeless shaped by your parents or society? M y parents. They've always given to charities.

i j j

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compiled by Jennifer Jett

images Behind

H U

thelens The hardest part about being a Tribune photographer is making the mundane exciting... O oh goody another picture of the Shatner buildÂ ing! This year we have tried to make the most ordinary photo assignment interesting and stimulating to the eye, and thanks to our dedicated photogÂ raphers we think we've succeeded. On behalf of the photo editors, we would like to thank the photographers for all their help this semester.

VLADIMIR EREMIN

Better get your grad photo taken to be included in

OLD MCGILL 2005

The Official McGill Yearbook ■

JOSTEN'S Canada are the official photographers for the Students' Society o f M cG ill University

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E xam s now

available flavours! With testing options expanding exponentially, you have even more reasons to procrastinate

in each academic sphere, and strives to demonstrate ones active skills in a specific subject area.

Nothing says lovin' like an aced exam, fresh outta the oven.

YASEMIN EMORY

NARVAN BOUZARI

f reading this article is merely serving as yet another study avoidance tactic, then you are probably all too aware of the time of the year. Endless romps to the library for late-night pleading with the self-check out machines, an impossibly nar row selection of microwaveable dinner options, vibrating home from a 24-hour coffee shop after an evening cramming experi ence. It is finals season, the insufferable curse of all university students. O r is it?

Tradition does not equal efficacy For clarification purposes, the term exam hereby refers to the process of learning specific course material, which is sub sequently regurgitated in written form within a limited time peri od. To better understand this practice, one has to go all the w ay back to 19th century England. In 1887, the British g o v

ernment came up with the idea of "payment by results." This method determined how much each university would receive in grant funds, based on an annual inspection that tested individual students' performance on reading pas sages and arithmetic test cards. The direct link between teach ers' salaries and government funding led to an increasing emphasis on performance assessment. As the pressure on school accountability intensified, so did the instructors' focus on reparing students for forthcoming tests, arguably neglecting roader academic objectives. But the system endured and, over a century later, it continues to be the primary form of per formance assessment in most higher education establishments. In spite of this, much disagreement has generated in recent years over the efficiency of conventional examinations. Students have argued that, given the external factors that can affect them during the test-writing period, in-class exams are not true assessments of knowledge. As a result, a number of alter natives have been developed. The US-based Educational Resources Information Center, for instance, maintains that a reasonable substitute for the more traditional form of testing, referred to as a "norm-based assess ment," is "performance-based assessment." This system varies

Modernizing traditional exams For instance, in the fine arts, it has been suggested that a portfolio assessment that evaluates ones ongoing creative progress is the best approach. In both the sciences and the humanities, on the other hand, an oral examination would best illustrate one's grasp of the facts and theories taught. The stu dent's abilities are then measured according to a criteria level, rather than against the performance of others. This avoids mass comparisons and, instead, ensures that each individual's knowl edge satisfies a predetermined set of objectives. However, the performance-based assessment does come at a cost. W hile it may measure what the education system sets out to provide, namely, a real-life applicatiori~of the knowledge and skills acquired, it is also more costly and time consuming than standardized testing, and relies on a subjective and less consistent evaluation procedure. Sign on the dotted line Another alternative to the traditional testing method is “contract grading." This method demands that the instructor and student agree-af the beginning of a course on the tasks that are to be completed by the student, on the support provided by the teacher and, finally, on the evaluation system that will be implemented. The student's achievement in relation to the previ ously mentioned tasks w ill be documented in the contract. Upon their completion, the two parties w ill cooperatively evaluate the work, choose new assignments and, if necessary, revise the objectives. Nevertheless, the level of communication required by this form of assessment is not practical, or even possible, in the large classes that often characterize Canadian universities at the undergraduate level. Something old, something new As such, some universities have taken a more practical approach to the problem at hand, and merely modified the tra ditional in-class tests through the creation of take-home or the open-book exams. M any students would rather test with new methods, such as the open book exam, than the more rigid examinations of undergraduates past. "Take home exams are more relevant to real-world situa tions. You almost always have access to reference material and are rarely under those kind of ridiculous time constraints," claims Dave Piccin, U3 Biochemistry. Jordan Langlois, U3 International Business, agrees. "I pre fer open book as opposed to memorizing something and then

the mcgill tribune | 23.11.04 | feature 15

UNDER PRESSURE

The anatom y o f stress

JÜDY M URPHY

Eat drink, sleep, and be merry

t's when your dog/room m ate ate your homework. Your girl friend left you for your best friend. You've put on seven pounds in the last month. Your alarm clock doesn't go off before a final exam, you accidently put in a pair of naughty red panties with your pristine whites, you w alk in on your parents doing the matress dance and you have a giant chin-zit that it about to errupt with the force of Vesuvius. Stress is a something we've been dealing with for years, but only now is it on a daily, nay, hourly basis. It's a physical and emotional response to change. The severity of change usu ally determines the amount of stress a person experiences. A lit tle stress acts as a motivator, forcing you to study for an exam or crank out and actually proofread your papers. But just as it can be beneficial, stress, whaen it causes you to feel powerless and out of control can be negative, causing your health and mental state to deteriorate. According to www.teenhealth.org when the body experi ences a stressful situation it automatically prepares to meet the challenge. The hypothalamus signals to the adrenal gland to secrete adrenaline and cortisol, which speed up the heart and breathing rate, dilate pupils and blood vessels, and cause the liver to secrete stored glucose for energy. W hen working prop erly, stress allows the body to function efficiently under pressure. If a stressful situation is prolonged and the body doesn't have a chance to shut off this activation system, the resilience of the immune system will decline. A study conducted in 2 0 0 0 by Décima Research for the Heart and Stroke Foundation found that "4 3 per cent of Canadian adults are frequently overwhelmed by stress.” According to the survey, the top sources of stress for those polled were workplace, family, finance, and time pressure: four factors which manage to get under the skin of not only adults employed in the workforce, but university students as well. M ore recently though, the Heart and Stroke Foundations Annual Report Card on the Health of Canadians (2002) placed the number of Canadians who are frequently stressed at 5 7 per cent.

You can shut the blinds, turn off the lights, and hide under the mattress as much as you want; stress is the inevitable glum reality of many North American workaholics. Therefore, it is not a matter of avoiding stress altogether, but simply learning how to handle it properly. According to Décimas study, three-quar ters of respondents said they were likely to, "watch excessive amounts of television, eat comfort foods, smoke cigarettes, or resort to alcohol to help control stress." And while these are all fine methods of coping, bear in mind that moderation, also known as the thorn in our side, is key to a healthy lifestyle. The body will tell you when it needs a break. Panic attacks, insomnia, stomach problems such as ulcers and irritable bowel syndrome, depression, abnormal heart rate, high blood pressure, and severe mood swings are physical indications that you need to slow down and relax. Identifying these symptoms and finding a solution to these problems can be very difficult. Being students in a competitive environment like M cG ill, it may seem like there is not enough time to reorganize one's schedule and take a break. Jim Robinson, a senior counsillor with McGill's Counseling Service, says, "planning something, taking the time to do it and finding a w ay to implement it are important steps towards fighting stress." The best w ay is to give the body a natural rest to recreate the state that it is in when sleeping. Meditation is "taking a moment to breathe in awareness," says Robinson. By taking 10 minutes twice a day to meditate and concentrate on the breath low in the abdomen while pulling the mind aw ay from the chaos of society, you will become more aware of yourself and your surroundings almost immediately. Additionally, by treating your body w e ll—eating three meals a day, drinking plenty of water, exercising regularly, and develop ing a sleeping pattern (six to eight hours a night, going to bed and waking up around the same time each day)—will help make stress a positive factor in your life. Change is part of life and there will be setbacks. In order to overcome change you need to identify and act on your problems, while at the same time allowing yourself time for leisure and mental rest. ■

BENJI FELDMAN

EXAMI NOLOGY blurting it out. In an open book exam you have to prepare how to relate the class material to practical situations." Using a similar line of reasoning, Political Science Professor Sam Noumoff has come up with his own twist on mid-term and final examinations. A week prior to tests, students in his Comparative Revolutions class receive a sheet with three potential exam questions pertaining to each section of the course. On the actual day, one question is eliminated in each section, and the student picks one of the remaining two to answer in essay format. According to Noumoff, "This type of exam places an emphasis on what students know, rather than what they do not know." However, there are students w ho enjoy the mass congrega tions that take place in the gym at the end of each semester. Leiselle Pilgrim, U3 Physiology, is one of these. "I prefer regular exams because being in the exam room with other students helps you to concentrate better and therefore do better, instead of put ting off a take home exam."

"Take home exams are more relevant to realworld situations. You almost always have access to reference material and are rarely under those kind of ridiculous time constraints." —Dave Piccin, U3 Biochemistry

"Plus," she adds, "with an open book or takehome test, the professor expects a lot more of you than they would otherwise. The access to references means that the questions get harder and may not necessarily reflect how well you understand the materi al." At the end'of the day, there is just no pleasing 'em. However you may feel about exams, they have become an integral part of the educational process. W ithout them, little effort would be made to grasp the everyday material taught in lectures. Students would not spend time pulling together a semester's worth of infor mation, to then make some sort of sense out of it. The more chal lenged students would not be faced with their shortcomings, while the more academically talented ones would not be rewarded for their hard work. Because, let's face it, how each student performs in a subject is not a direct result of the examination method imple mented. Rather, it is due to the amount of work put in by a student who benefits from an egalitarian evaluation system. W ith luck, if you put in the hours going to class and studying, your mark will reflect the effort and if you don't, well, our friends at Burger King are always hiring. ■

Who be responsible for all this business? Behind the scenes of exam season ho are those people who stare at us with those beady little eyes, as if they're using X-ray vision to peek through our flashy "comfort" exam wear? Invigilators—trained to tend to our examination needs and keep any sneaky behaviour in check. In the Faculties of Arts, Science, and Engineering, current ly registered graduate students are invited to apply for invigi lator positions. For Engineering, applications were due before October 8, for Arts and Science, between O ctober 13 and November 2. Forget elaborate cheating schemes with your second-year friends for next year because undergraduates are not eligible to apply. Invigilators are paid 10 dollars per hour, and because Arts and Science invigilators are expectecf to show up an hour before the scheduled start time, they can receive up to $ 4 5 per exam. According to Recorder and Chief Invigilator for Arts and Science Sharon Bezeau, the Iw o faculties are scheduled to administer 2 9 5 exams for the December exam period. Exam scheduling begins after add-drop period has ended, and when the process does begin, they take into account the seating capacity tor each exam time sbt. "W e schedule 1 ,0 0 0 students every exam time slot into the gym; 6 4 5 into the main gym,” Bezeau says. Additionally, "the gym is always filled to capacity. W e also make use of class rooms with tables in the Arts, Leacock, Burnside Hail, Rutherford, O tto Maas, Trottier, W ong, and W ilson Hall buildings." W hat to do when the gym's at maximum capacity? "W e sometimes schedule up to 1 ,0 0 0 students in one exam time slot across those buildings as well" she says. Because Arts and Science often give exams for fac ulties like Education, Music, and Nursing, the office hires invigilators to supervise all administered exams. Other faculties hire similarly. But what if you're an English Literature student enrolled in a bunch of engineering classes? Bezeau explains that for these students, "the only w ay to minimize their exam conflicts is by using software that takes their regis trations into account." This software is used to make sure that students are not scheduled to have three exams in one day or four exams over the period of two days. ■

Chatting on M S N does not count as studying... even if you do have your books open.

-compiled by James Golowiec

BENJI FELDMAN

^^usic B ringing d e a th m e ta l to th e c a m p u s s c e n e -

At CKUT radio, there's something for everyone HILARY ELKINS

COURTESY OF CAROLINE DIX

Dix is no weather girl—we re talking M y Dying Bride and M egadeth here. aybe I have a dark side," muses Caroline Dix, host of the weekly Saturday night CKUT 9 0 .3 FM death metal show, "Legion of Brutality" (10-11 pm), but if so, you wouldn't know it at first sight. Before meeting Dix, it would be almost natural to expect a pasty, disgruntled, pierced and tattooed young woman shrouded in black and smoking a cig arette: Instead, this fourth-year student waiting cheerfully inside Second Cup looks more like the mainstream, pop-lovin' stu dents that dash in and out of M cG ill's front gates everyday. W ith a shock of glossy brown hair and legs clad in jeans, Dix's only hint of the expected black was a simple leather jack et, which leaned more towards "hip" than "head-banger." Dix's enthusiasm didn't fit the above stereotype, either. She is fanatical about both death metal and her experience at CKUT, M cG ill's non-profit campus community radio station. "I love it," she says. "I've always liked heavy métal. It's very passionate. It's very honest. Technically, I love the sound —it's all about individuality." The individuality, not sur prisingly, is one of the perks she values most about working at the station: "It's free-form radio. I call all the shots. I play what I w ant to play. It's great." CKUT's W e b site, www.ckut.ca, ; boasts a manifesto-like description that encourages experimentation. "CKUT's music programming emphasizes the uncommon, the new, and the

HANDS

OFF

THE

daring," Dix confirms. "W e have a variety of specialized music programs as well as open format programs that span many musical genres. Deejays make their own musical selec tions without the aid of a play list, choosing from recordings sent to CKUT by artists and record companies around the world as well as from their ow n private collections." "I want to make sure M cG ill students w ho are interested in radio can take part," she adds. "There's so much you can learn." W hat's her advice about getting in on the action? "Sign up for an orientation; familiarize yourself with the equipment," she explains. "You could also sign up for the newsletter, which always has information. CKUT prides itself on having quality programs. You need to get experience working the boards and volunteering, so the best thing to do is work on someone's collective show. It's very easy to get involved." CKUT holds volunteer sessions every third Thursday of the month at noon, 3pm, and 6pm. There are two levels of involvement. Initially, students sign up as members, and after they demonstrate committed involvement at the station, they become full-fledged volunteers. If you don't have any prior radio experience, fear not—the station offers training in every thing from on-air broadcasting to digital sound editing and

interviewing. CKUT's theme-based collective shows are also a good w a y to get some experience. "Venus," for example, is a CKUT collective show focused on women in music. N e w vol unteers can cut their teeth on-air by building their own play list of female musicians in any genre and taking over the program one week. The only necessary step is contacting the program coordinator and signing up. W hen asked about her own process of climbing the CKUT ladder, Dix lists a seemingly endless, diverse portfolio of early volunteering activities. "Promotion, fund-raising, assisting the music librarian, pre viewing and reviewing..." she lists. Some quality on-air expe rience and a few program proposals later, she landed her own show and named it "Legion of Brutality." "I knew the music they needed. M etal was underex posed," she says. W hen asked what graduation w ill bring her, Dix waxes a bit melancholic—"I'm going to miss the show." She hopes to pursue a career in the radio industry, but she's not necessarily focusing solely on metal. "I'm a fan of music in general," Dix says. "I don't limit myself." W ith that attitude, she'll certainly go places. Limits are the one thing that w on't be killing this radio star. ■

CANVAS

Three ye a rs in prison fo r sh a rin g ? 'm not made of moneyl Twenty bucks for a 25-cent hunk of plastic? I like music, but I'm not unloading a thousand bucks a year just to listen to new tunes every month. I am now thor oughly convinced that mp3s are the w ay to go. The idealists that defend "the artists," in declaring their stance against downloading free music, leave in their wake a trail of hypocrisy. Anti-corporate as many of them may be, thisattitude ends up actually promoting big business, if I don't download music from Kazaa or now defunct Napster, where

W ill I play ball with snivelling, insincere, ignorant Republicans? No siree, Bob. I just don't feel sorry for the multimillionaires. am I to go? HMV? Tower Records? Screw them! I'd my soul to Satan than CEOs. I was once a little torn on this issue myself, until thoughts of a few snarky politicians. M y mind is now In September, Republican congressman Lamar Smith

rather sell I read the made up. proposed

a bill that could give a maximum sentence of three years in the slammer to anyone in the states who "illegally" shares music files. He likened sharing music files on the Internet to shoplifting from a record store. W hat a load of horseshit! Such O ld Testament-style commandments may fool some folks, but it sure ain't fooling me. W ill I pay to see concerts? N o doubt. W ill I buy a band's album at its concert? Absolutely. W ill I play ball with snivelling, insincere, ignorant Republicans? N o siree, Bob. I just don't feel sorry for multimillionaire spoiled rock bands like Metallica that harp on about the evils of mp3s. The fact is that they still have a multitude of ways to make money: con certs, DVD sales, endorsements, even clothing lines—you can't burn a T-shirt onto a CD. Last year, I downloaded some new and exciting underground house and hip hop tracks and then proceeded to attend two of these artists' concerts within a month. Sure, you may retort, there's no reason to pity huge bands, but consider the fate of developing artists and independent music labels. But where exactly will I find their records? Ultra corporate W al-Mart has successfully cornered the CD market,

DANIEL C H O D O S

ostensibly driving out chains that carry more than its stock of 5 ,0 0 0 albums. As such, indies and up-and-comers ate seeing progressively less shelf time than they used to. Wal-Mart, like most filthy-rich companies, treats their products like nothing more than commodities. This leaves little room for the little guy, or the artist. Besides, it's misguided to insist that artists themselves, who are paid a mere $ 1 .6 0 per CD sold at a retail outlet, suffer from on-line music sharing. As a potential solution, I propose Kazaa and other media-sharing W eb sites pay this fee to the bands, which could be easily recouped through advertising rev enue. But smaller bands and their promoters are not the ones blowing the whistle on this thorny issue. True artists are more concerned about sharing their music with their fans, regardless of the means. M any smaller bands are simply concerned about not going broke while on tour. It is today's corporate culture that makes us feel evil for robbing from the rich. At the end of the day, we're not stealing, we're "sharing." Isn't "sharing is caring" what w e were always taught in grade school? ■

^^ilm

the mcgill tribune j 23.1104 | a&e 17

PREVIEWS

Q uod m e nutrit m e destruit RIDM shows the graveyard where ships—and their handlers—go to die

LISE TREUTLER ship a day, a death a day," claims the thick capi tals on the poster. Is this truth or simply an alluring film tagline? Shipbreakers, a co-project of the National Film Board of C anada and Storyline Entertainment, premiered last Saturday as one of the many documentaries presented at this year's seventh anniversary Rencontres internationales du documentaire de Montréal, which ran from November 1 121 at g variety of venues. Storylines Ed Barreveld, the doc umentary's co-producer, introduced the film in an intimate downtown theatre with a heartfelt, grateful speech, though he ended it with very telling words: "I can't say I hope you enjoy the film, but I hope you realize its importance and take something aw ay with you." Mere minutes into the lucid, spellbinding film, it became clear that the ominous tagline was indeed the sad reality of Along, India. Through brilliant cinematography, viewers are instantly transfixed by both the beauty and strength of aging ocean liners, and then transported to scenes of horror along a once beautiful beach, now carpeted by rust, metal, debris, and danger. And yet thousands of workers young and old, male and female, walk back and forth across the death trap as they break the mountainous ships that w all them in, piece by piece. W e ignorant North Americans become introduced to shipbreaking, as the controversial Third W orld industry is called, "the ultimate paradox." “ For the shipbreakers, the job that will likely kill them is their only hope of survival," explains Barreveld. That's the truth of which Shipbreakers speaks. O n average, one worker dies each day in the shipbreaking yards of Along. Those who live to go home night after night have at least a one-in-four chance of dying of cancer because of their constant exposure to toxic fumes on the job. And yet Along, created purely for the industry, is a busy Indian com munity of 4 0 ,0 0 0 migrant workers with more arriving each day. W h y do they go when they're aware of the dangers? They go to live, and more often to help their families live—shipbreaking is one of the highest-paid industries in

.India. Barreveld, along with co-producer and director Michael Kot, spent a month in Along filming and interview ing locals, ranging from six-year-old orphans to the elderly victims of their former profession. Looking into the eyes of the young men who left home for Along despite constant warn ings, viewers see and feel the hope, energy, and determina tion of the community. W hen a captain describes how it feels to be on his former home's last voyage—to the grave ya rd -p o w e rle ss to the decision of the ship's owner, viewers empathize with the ships themselves, too, as they die and even as they kill. Shipbreakers proves how remarkable a documentary this

NFB.CA

has become. Today, w e have more secrets to probe than ever before, in every hidden corner of the globe. N o one can leave a theatre after seeing a documentary—be it comedic and light-hearted or serious and sometimes appalling—without being affected in some way. N ot every one will venture to Alang to see for themselves, but all will know, and the documentary will have accomplished its mis sion: to move and to inform. Montreal may be more famous for the upbeat summer fes tivals, but those who made it to even one film at RIDM 2 0 0 4 know why it's one of our city's most eagerly awaited annual events. ■ If you missed the festival, log on to ww w.ridm .qc.ca to find out about this year's favourites.

^ ^ ilm A Do Vinci C ode for dumbasses N a tio n a l Treasure should be buried forever SUSAN COOKE & SIMONE CRUICKSHANK I t's just so darn nice to see a return to good old American lvalues in a movie: no sex, no swearing, no (believable] vioI lence, no plot, and no humour. W h o needs any of that, anyway? National Treasure is truly a treat for the whole family. Bring the kiddies and let the movie do the thinking for you. Seriously, any individual thinking at all is not recommended, as it will only provoke rage towards this ridiculous film, and there ain't nothin' wholesome alqout that. The story itself is literally unbelievable. The—ahem— "action" begins with our hero, Benjamin Franklin Gates (Nicolas Cage) searching for treasure in a ship that has been buried under the ice for over two centuries. The treasure was hidden by America's founding fathers w ay back in the histo ry books, and the map too was hidden—on the back of the Declaration of Independence, of all places. The treasure was just too large for one person, Ben tells us, because with great power comes great responsibility. W ait, isn't that Spiderman's line? Ben is accompanied on his journeys by his trusty oT Riley (Justin Bartha), who conveniently acts as five sidekicks in one, being an expert in several completely unrelated fields. Also along for the dig is a naughty British man (Sean Bean) who coincidentally has no respect for the Declaration of Independence. After shooting Ben, he sets out to steal it, prompting good oT patriotic Ben to save the Declaration by stealing it first. That's right—our boy is a feisty historian who suddenly becomes a master thief! The rest of the movie plays out in much the same vein, stretching the audience's sanity until they gasp for mercy. The clues in the search for treasure are totally unconnected, so all the fun of viewer guessing is completely ruined. National Treasure gets no help from its cast, which flounders in a sea

MOVIES.YAHOO.COM

It's my constitution, I saw it first.

of nonsensical plot turns and stereotypical "action movie dia logue"—minus, of course, the action. Cage should have plenty going for him. He's a member of the Coppola film dynasty with a few good movies under his belt, but someone must have driven a truck full of money up to his house for this one. Unfortunately, he. just can't seem to get aw ay from the Nicolas Cage Acting Equation: eye brow lift + nostril flare = raw emotion. His earnest effort is somewhat pathetic and charming, but probably not what the filmmakers were aiming for. He and his love interest (the beautiful but robotic Diane Kruger) do have chemistry between them, of course culminating in a wholesomely tightlipped, no-tongues-allowed kiss. This film will neither offend you nor keep you awake at night, but eventually its ridiculous plot and stiff acting will cause you to wince and race for the nearest exit. ■

THEATRE. The Tempest—Saidye Bronfman Centre51 70 Côte-Ste-Catherine—November 21 to December 6.

■

Shakespeare's final play will be performed beginning this week at the Saidye Bronfman Centre for the Arts in the Leanor and Alvin Segal Theatre. The Centre is committed to delivering high-quality productions for a wide tastes. Last season, the theatre gave a welkreceiv tation of Shakespeare's The Merchant o f Venice sion, Shylock. The Tempest is arguably Shakespe est romance, combining elements of comedy an Directed by Madd Harold, this production inco ent from all over the globe, including renowned dancer Kayla Fell. ART. Timelength—Leonard and Bina Ellen Art Gallery, Concordia University—1400 boul. de Maisonneuve O .— until December 22. In this intriguing exhibition, the nature and unfolding of time is explored through delicate imagery and projection techniques. Young Canadian artists and older ones alike will MUSIC. Samcollection, Roberts Band—Metropolis—59 Stebe featured in this which opened earlier thisrue month and will run right up to Christmas. In addition to the films, Catherine E.—November 24. the past fewwill years, Singer-songwriter Sam Roberts essaysOver on filmic time be presented by, among others, has accomplished more than his simple roots might dictate— gallery director Michèle Theriault. In conjunction with the a good Montrealer, Roberts loves Canadiens and Sta event, mark your calendar for La Salaour Rosa's (4848 boul. good pint of Labatt HisWarhol's 2003 album, We Were Born in Laurent) showing of50. Andy eight-hour film, Empire, a Flame, was12,a beginning hit in Canada, on December at 4pm. the US, and Europe. Exploring all sorts of themes, this recording re-released many of the tracks from his original EP, The Inhuman Condition. His songs prove that he's a man on a mission, advocating an overtly socialist message, such as in hit folk song "Brother Down," which stresses that we should help those less fortu nate. His work is also considered an ode to the hard, pump ing rock 'n' roll artists of the days of yore. ART. Armstrong S/xand Room 112—Optica—372 rue Ste-Catherine O :—until December 11. Artists David Armstrong and Adad Hannah converge for this creative, multi-dimensional vernissage, which Com bines elements of music, stage theatre, visual art, photogra phy, and video projection. In adjacent corridors, Armstrong Six and Room 1 12 contrast one another magnificently. Armstrong Six denotes the wreckage of a party the previous night (or so it seems], complete with reflective mirrors that make the viewers feel as though they were a part of the fun. Next door, in Room 1 12, actors pose, replicating images that flash up as photographs on the projection screen above. The audience becomes so much a part of the performance in both these works. MUSIC. JackSOUL and James Brown—Nov. 2 7 Metropolis. The Godfather of Soul himself is headed our way. Alcoholism and drug abuse aside, he is an icon that should not be missed by any jazz aficionado. Opening for him is JackSOUL, led by frontman Haydain Neale, a modern crooner who is endowed with one of the most rhythmic, nur turing voices ever to hit the R&B/jazz scene. With the suc cess of his recent release Resurrected, including hit songs "The River" and "Love Jones," JackSOUL is doing very well for itself. DANCE. Moon Water—Place des Arts—260 boul. de Maisonneuve O. —November 26-27, 8pm. East meets West as the acclaimed choreography of Moon Wafer hits the Place des Arts stage this weekend for two highly anticipated shows. Set to J.S. Bach's composition Six Suites for Solo Cello, water and moonlight are used to create a magnificent collage that enraptures the audience. Moon Wafer was created in Taiwan by celebrated choreog rapher Lin Hwai-min. Presented in part by Les Grands Ballets Canadiens de Montreal and Danse Danse. CLASSICAL. An Evening of French Music—5035 boul. de Maisonneuve O .—November 27, 8pm. This is a night of quality performances not to be missed. Compositions by Fauré, Franck, and Francoeur will be played on piano and cello, by Sandra Hunt and and Gary Russell, both of whom were winners of CBC's Young Performers Award in their careers. Russell is a cellist for the Montreal Symphony Orchestra. W ine and cheese will be served for those in attendance.

credits: saidyebrongman.org, ellengallery.concordia.ca, samroberts.com. hour.ca, ukrecordings.com, tag.bc.ca, classicalgreats.com

v"'y ' ''

Check out A&E on-line for a preview for the ■Golden Dogs: this Thursday at Le Swimming!

18 a&e | 23.11.04 | the mcgill tribune

S w e e t o n th e inside, b u t u ltim a te ly s ta le Ethnic jokes do not a good gag make HILARY ELKINS ugar Sammy, Indian ex-pat and self-proclaimed urban-come dian, took the stage twice Saturday night at The Comedy Zone (1 7 4 0 bout René-Lévesque). The second instalment of a three-day marathon of performances, the nights highlights will be crafted into the comedian's first DVD. Judging by the attention he's garnered from Id, Hour, and M irror—where he was named Montreal's *#1 Comedian of 2 0 0 4 ," his talents warrant such a production. Having also appeared on BET, the Comedy Network, and most recently at our beloved 2 0 0 4 Just for Laughs Festival, Sammy's accolades announce the beginning of a promising career. However, his live act casts a dubious light on the previous positive receptions. Roughly 125 people settled into the dark, semi-circular room for the first of the evening's two-show program. Stoked with a healthy supply of Smirnoff Ice and stale Doritos, the crowd's enthu siasm escalated as the emcee, followed by two other comedians, warmed them up for the headliner. W aco, Texas native Steve Levesque offered commentary on fundamentalist Christians and Montreal, replete with jabs at the city's interesting parking regula tions, while the African-American emcee made full use of his race in a variety of quips. These early, semi-successful jokes were ulti mately forced to prop up the entire show, ending up highlights compared to the simple, obvious, and oftentimes lazy material that Sammy disappointingly served up.

N o t to say he's without stage presence; Sammy builds a solid rapport with his audiences. He's warm and demonstrates a mean Indian accent. W hen he calls out to crowd members, he's likely to poke fun at himself instead of the front row. There's no denying that he can win any group over during a 45-minute set. Audience intimacy aside, his material—more shocking than smart—needs an overhaul. Sammy focuses on deviant sexual behavior and stereotypes of Indian and Asian populations, and pantomimes compromising bedroom situations and little Chinese men with aplomb. But, since when is simulating masturbation and mocking an Asian affinity for karaoke innovative comedy? Eddie Murphy, Bill Cosby, M argaret C h o —these names are synonymous With biting social commentary and spot-on impersonations that deconstruct stereotypes while providing a fresh perspective on why they're partly true. Sugar Sammy merely perpetuates the well-worn assumptions. The audience already knows that cows are wor shipped in India and arranged marriages are still an accepted cul tural practice. But the determined Sammy likes to make fun of his Indian roots—with a mostly Caucqsian audience. Unfortunately, he scores points for doing it. "Down with Brown," the late show, tried to present more eth nic material than the early set. However, there were two distinct obstacles to this attempt: the large amount of ethnic material in the first set, and the fact that the second's most ethnic offering was a total of three African-American openers as opposed to one. M ore sex jokes and tired ethnic stereotypes resulted in a lacklustre finale. Sugar Sammy's second performance maintained the same trajec-

KIRA COSTANZA

What's the deal with white/black/Hispanic/Asian/Indian people? tory as his first appearance, no more and no less tailored to the diverse crowd he was trying to attract. W hen asked about his plans during breaks between shows, Sammy enthused, "I'd love to get into film and television, but I real ly love live comedy. I can't be aw ay from it for too long. If I'm aw ay from it for more than two weeks, I get depressed.” Depression aside, he may need to take a longer break and freshen up his material, lest his fame be cut down to the—ahem — proverbial 15 minutes. ■

Tickets: Metropolis and Spectrum Box-Offices.

514.908.9090 1.866.908.9090

Ticketpro:

www.ticketpro.ca with special guests

& IL T C X P t P O

1GILLETT. ) M l H I MN ' l l N I cro u p

the mcgill tribune | 23.11.04 | a&e 19

^ |) h e a tr e The o rig in o f e x tre m e m a k e o v e r

CD. Still N o t Getting Any by Simple Plan Following

Shaw's classic bests reality TV CLARA SCHWARZ n the spirit of a Cinderella/Pretty Woman scenario, Pygmalion partakes in the classic tradition of randomly picking a nobody and somehow turning that person into a somebody. In the case of this classical play, Eliza Doolittle plays an uneducated Cockney flower girl from around the corner, who is schooled in upper-class life lessons. She is taught the art of speech by phonetics expert Professor Higgins, and she is coached in proper ladylike manners by Colonel Pickering. From her primitive beginnings, when she would callously pronounce the alphabet, "ay, bay, say, day over the course of six months she learns how to properly spell out a Victorian "hoow do you doo?" The idea was initially to transform this common girl into a Duchess but the lessons learned become far-reaching. This general plot may sound familiar, as the musical M y

COURTESY OF DIANE MOON

Fair Lady was based on Pygmalion, but George Bernard Shaw's masterpiece is mucn more interesting and witty. It reveals the implications of moulding a being suitable to upper-class society, and then projecting that person into unfa miliar social environments, while never returning to the past. The central point remains that a transformation is not a rever sal process; it requires sacrifices as well as amnesia, so as not to betray ones true identity. The Professional Theatre Program of Dawson College, which presents this absolutely amusing and interesting show, is worthy of a standing ovation for its production. Presented at the Dome Theatre (Place-SEHenri metro) until November 27, this play would be a welcome distraction amidst essay writing and exam preparations. The shows only downfall is that,, due to financial restric tions, the décor and setting are quite dry. But the actors are surprisingly talented, especially because the script requires that the players learn to speak Victorian English. Moreover, the story and situations are absolutely delightful. N ot only is Pygmalion a brilliantly funny show, but it is also filled with morals and lessons of which three in particu lar are worth mentioning. The first is that when in presence of high-class society, the only appropriate topic of conversation is one another's health and the weather—everything else is taboo. The second moral is illustrated by Eliza's father, the partially alcoholic Alfred Doolittle, who sells his daughter to Higgins and Pickering. W hen asked, "Do you have any morals?" the father bluntly responds, "I can't afford them!" And the third moral comes from Eliza at the end of the play, who explains the difference between a flower girl and a lady. "It is not the w ay she behaves," says the newly over hauled Eliza, "it is the w ay she is treated." This deep mes sage stands up as a powerful cry for respect, understanding, and most of all, good humour. ■

up their massively successful

debut, N o Pads, N o Helmets... Just Balls, the Montreal-based band Simple Plan continues to demonstrate archetypal all-embracing Canadiana.

m -

r ' i

The band members all hail from Quebec and are well embraced by their home province, but they have also found success- in the more mainstream English market. Simple Plan's music, consisting mainly of pop-rock melodies, are catchy enough for 12-yearold girls at a slumber party, but they do retain

enough edge to satisfy older, more jaded listeners. W hile the pin-up looks of lead singer Pierre Bouvier give the band its heartbreaker status, the crisp and assertive lyrical content remind listeners that "boy band" is not in their vocabulary. Despite their popularity, the new album fails to break any new ground, content with reusing the same faux-punk sing-along melodies and the same parents just don t under stand" lyrics as their first disc. W hile songs such as M e Against the W orld and Jump feature strong guitar riffs, and the disc closer, Untitled, skillfully utilizes a backing orches tra, the rest of the album falls victim to complacency. In the end, one can't help but feel that this Simple Plan needs a complex reworking. —Tim Chan CD. Grab That Gun by The Organ Katie Sketch, lead singer of the Organ, sounds exactly like what Morrissey would if he went and got himself a sex change. She's got that same smooth, velvety, echoey, and generally a w e some voice. The Organ isn't simply a Smiths-worshipping cult, though. Grab That Gun is an origi nal—and freaking am azing—piece of postpunk revival. In the grand tradition of punk, the songs are pretty short, so this 1 1-track album clocks in at only half an hour. That, however, is the worst thing about it. The music is coo! as hell, with glittery guitar that sounds shiny and metallic and, yes, an organ. They manage to sneak it into every song, but their usage ranges from almost unnoticeable enhancement of the other instruments to the right-out-there cascades in "i am not surprised." The whole thing's got a beat that manages to be both doom-filled and catchy at the same time. O f course, if you're not the type of person w ho enjoys music that s apt to make you spontaneously burst into tears, this may not be for you. Sketchs musings on cheating, breakups, and other things that make you stay in bed for days can be bloody depress ing, but hey, the lyrics are great. Grab That Gun rocks so much it makes me have con

^ ^ h e a tre

vulsions. It's easily the best new album I've heard this year. —Melissa Price

B lin d e d b y th e lig h t T N t breaks th e fourth w all an d shines all night

CAMP MASSAD Wanted: some good people!

□ A N Y H O R O VITZ orrice Hall's latest production Too Much Light Makes the Baby go Blind: 3 0 Short Plays in 6 0 Minutes is currently playing at the TNC Theatre. If you like the absurd and the comedic, you'd be a fool to miss it. The show, written by a Chicago-based collective of writers known as the "Neo-Futurists," is a selection of 30 short plays designed to make you laugh and think, often at the same time. W hat makes this play unique is the absence of what's known as the "fourth wall," which separates the actors from the audience. In fact, it is the audience that determines in what order the scenes are to be performed by a "menu" in the play bill. At times, the scenes themselves are fuelled purely by the audience's participation. Directors Kate Walsh and Danny Coleman have put together a fantastic ensemble. There were no noticeable slip ups in dialogue, and they really managed to bring the audi ence into the play. More than that, the actors are supremely funny in their roles. Take, for example, the parody of King Lear, performed in only a matter of minutes and with only four acts. A blind Lear (Gabriel Richter) stumbles across the stage asking if peo ple love him—every time he hears a "yes," he takes off an arti cle of clothing until there are no more "yesses" to indulge. As such, a warning is needed: this play is not for the faint of heart or the easily aroused. It is charming partly because the actors

are clearly having so much fun with it, right down to the guy who pops up to announce the changing of the acts. Lear is only one in a streak of funny shorts. M any scenes, such as "Flammable Pants," make poignant social commen tary. Other scenes, like "It's a Breeze," which depicts the joys of being a young white heterosexual male, get a little too far under your skin. Several of the plays deal with very serious themes, and the cast does a great job of changing between the light and heavy subjects with no real preparation time, since they don't know what play the audience will pick next. The show is at its best when making fun of the ridiculous ways human beings interact with one another. Take, for exam ple, "Title," where Greg (Peter Hibbs) and Betsy (Julia Talajic) engage in a potentially romantic conversation, using only descriptions of the sentence type one might utter in that sitüâtion. It comes out as one of the funniest plays. Because of the.audience-oriented nature of the produc tion, Too Much Light is perfectly suited for the intimate TNC atmosphere. On a larger stage, the characters would seem less real, and the fourth wall would be too much of an obsta cle to overcome. As it stands, Too Much Light Makes the Baby G o Blind is barrels of fun, and if you've never been to the TNC, this is the perfect time to experience its magic. ■ Too Much Light Makes the Baby G o Blind is playing from November 24 -2 7 at Morris Hall, 8pm —$ 6 for students, $8 for adults.

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CKUT

ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING

Tuesday, November 30, 2004 Newman Centre, 3484 Peel Street Agenda: Elections, department and committee reports, proposd by-law changes Proposed by-law changes available at: http://www.ckut.ca/bylaws_revise.html CONTACT: http://ckut.ca / 3647 University / (514) 398-6787

sports PROFILE - REDMEN FOOTBALL

Redmen trio receiving their destiny LeBlanc, Martin, McGuire define an era of McGill football worked together for that long, they know each other well and are very concise. That made Connell's transi tion smoother." Though this season's Redmen were ultimately eliminated from the playoffs with a first-round loss to Université de Montréal two weeks ago, the offensive unit re-energized the whole program and made M cG ill football worth watching again. The receivers' bond was most obvious through their inspired and cohesive play. LeBlanc caught 3 0 balls for 4 8 6 yards and four touch downs, the second-highest yardage total in Quebec, while Martin had 22 grabs for 2 3 7 yards and a major. The two were named to the all-conference team, while M cG uire wasn't too shab by himself, finishing with 1.4 catches for 2 3 9 yards and two scores. "This year w e really came into our ow n," says LeBlanc. "It all started in 2001 when w e had our own rook ie locker room, and then w e went through the four years together. This season was the pinnacle of our rela tionship. It was the most fun I've ever had playing football."

JOSEPH GILGOFF Individually, Rob LeBlanc, Alex Martin, and Chris M cG uire are great athletes and skillful receivers. Together, though, they make up something much more special. These three players have grown up as members of the Redmen football program for the past four years, playing with class and grit while feeding off each other to develop into a fear some unit. W ith LeBlanc and Martin graduating in June, the trio is disband ing, marking the end of an era in Redmen football. Four years ago, LeBlanc, a native of Vancouver; M artin, from TroisRivières; and M cG uire, of O ttaw a, were rookies during head coach Chuck M cM anns first season with M cG ill. W hile LeBlanc returned the kickoff on the Redmen s first play of the year and never looked back, Martin and M cG uire struggled through their first campaigns, fighting to earn playing time for future seasons. "I had a terrible first impression," admits McGuire. "I thought I was going to get cut. "First year was rough," he adds. "You didn't want to come to practice every week.” O f course, M cG uire kept com ing, as did Martin, and eventually the two got quality playing time and joined LeBlanc on the field in time to revel in McGill's national semi-final appearance in 2 0 0 2 . However, the group then suffered through a sub-par 2 0 0 3 season. Martin lamented how tough it was to hit such a low. "For all the guys who started my year, [last season] was hard because w e came from a good year and sud

YASEMIN EMORY

As M artin (right) can testify, McGuire has very soft hands. denly offensively w e weren't able to produce at all," he says. The highs and lows of the first three years were only a buildup for the 2 0 0 4 season, during which the receiving core gelled like never before. They combined with new start ing quarterback M att Connell to form

one of the most exciting and produc tive offences in the nation. M cM ann explains that without the receivers' experience and pres ence on the field, such success would not have been possible. "They've been together four years," he remarks. "W hen guys have

N ot always fun and games The corps, though, did face numerous setbacks. M cG uire has fought injuries the majority of his uni versity career, while the diminutive Martin faced one crushing hit after another. Just this season, LeBlanc played while hurt the for the majority of the year, a feat that didn't fail to impress his mates. "He didn't have to play with that broken finger," M artin comments. "Everyone already knew he was a good football player." LeBlanc played through his ail ment for the same reason that

M cG uire fought so hard to recover after each injury and that Martin played every game in a M cG ill uni form like it was his last. These men were true team players, and couldn't stand the thought of letting each other down. W hen LeBlanc travelled this past summer, he found himself without a weight room in which to train, and had to employ ridiculous means to stay in shape. W h y go through all the trouble? "A lot of it was my teammates," says LeBlanc. "W ha t would get me up in the morning was the thought of guys like Chris and Alex training. To show up out of shape would have been a disrespect and disservice to them." Indeed, a unique quality of these receivers is their ability to mix business with pleasure; they know how to enjoy playing football as friends, but also know when it was time to go to work. As LeBlanc decides between attempt ing to pursue a career in the CFL and taking a job in the business world, and Martin ponders a master's degree in psychology, M cG uire has one year left, during which he will pass the torch to receivers like G reg Hetherington and Andrew Dodd. "I look forward to playing a big ger role in the offence," asserts M cG uiip. "I know w e're going to have a great team. O n the flip side, I'm sad Rob and Alex won't be there with me." Even after the playing days of these three receivers are long over, however, their mark on the Redmen tra dition will remain. For four years, Rob LeBlanc, Alex M artin, and Chris M cG uire have given their all while sporting the Red 'n' W hite. Needless to say, this class act has laid the FieldTurf for Redmen success in the years to come.B

TH E R E D Z O N E

P laying fo r th e m o b g o t C la re tt w h a c k e d he number one rule of the mob is that if you get pinched, you don't say anything that could incriminate your partners in crime. Former O hio State running back M aurice Clarett fol lowed that imperative, remaining loyal and tight-lipped when he, the Buckeyes, and coach Jim Tressel were under investigation by the N C A A in 2 0 0 2 . Two weeks ago, though, Clarett came forward in an interview with ESPN The Magazine, claiming that he did indeed receive cash, cars, cushy jobs, and inflated grades from those involved with O hio State football. He said that he kept quiet at the time of the initial investigation to shield Tressel and the pro gram. Now, though, Clarett feels he's been silent long enough, and has to clear his name with NFL personnel, by whom he may be drafted this coming April. Like DeNiro says in Goodfellas, "Never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut," and that's exact ly w hat Clarett did two years ago, after completing a fresh man season during which he ran for more than 1 ,2 0 0 yards and led the Buckeyes to a national title. He protect ed his coach, teammates, and the university. So why did Clarett become a pariah in Columbus? W h y did the boost ers stop lining his pockets, the tutors stop helping him get

by, and all the extras to which he was accustomed disap-, pear after the investigation? It seems extremely unjust that Clarett was singled out and his reputation so sullied that he felt it necessary to speak out and try to strike himself from football's blacklist. College athletes don't get paid, so it shouldn't come as a shock to anyone that they don't mind receiving hand outs, and Clarett's situation doesn't exist in a vacuum. He's just one of many athletes w ho took illegal money during their university days. If every single player who did so was shunned, the NBA would be reduced to Europeans and walk-ons, and the NFL just wouldn't exist. The system is bro ken, and Clarett became a sacrificial lamb. Clarett is no different than anybody else. Morals tend to fall by the wayside when everyone around you is trip ping over themselves to help you out, and Clarett shouldn't be isolated. If someone offered to pay my cellphone bills because I wrote an especially brilliant column one week, you'd better believe I'd go over my minutes. The really sad part is that pundits keep holding college students, teenagers even, to a higher standard than they hold most adults. Corporate scandals disappear quietly from the headlines, but Maurice Clarett can't catch a

ELISHA SIEGEL

break. W hen LeBron James accepted throwback jerseys a few months before the NBA draft and his high school eligi bility was in question, everyone blamed him for putting his career at risk. But he was 18 years old. W hen I was 1 8, I was excited to get a free cup of coffee at work, and I was getting paid. W hen grown men are bending over back wards to please them, can you really blame young athletes for believing they're superstars, immune to consequences? Shouldn't Clarett be considered a hero? He fell on the grenade for an entire football program that had been cor rupted. As he told The Magazine, "W ha t would have become of O hio State if I said everything [in 2 0 0 2 ]? Half the team would have been suspended and it would have been worse for everybody." Instead, he's been made a scapegoat for the failings of the university and the NC AA, which continually neglect to look out for the best interests of student-athletes. Clarett deserves a clean slate, but he's not going to get it. The former first-round lock will go in the fourth round of the upcoming draft to a team with some sense, and it will be a bargain relative to his skills. And as for Clarett's char acter, that team shouldn't’worry about it. He'll be in good company in the clubhouse. ■

the mcgill tribune | 23.11.04 | sports 21

PREVIEW - REDMEN BASKETBALL

PREVIEW - MARTLETS HOCKEY

They g o t g a m e

M cG ill looks to e a rn its n a tio n a ls s p o t

Redmen bailers filled with potential

Tough com petition in Q uebec could hold Martlets back from qualifying on merit alone MOH1T ARORA

YASEMIN EMORY

Rembeyo's high-flying act wasn't enough to lead McGill over Bishop's.

TH O M A S PAGLIARULO An interesting observation from Friday night's men's basketball game: this year's team will work for noise. The more fans cheer, the harder the Redmen play. And that could lead to impressive results. M cG ill lost a heartbreaker at Love Competition Hall on Friday 908 6 to Bishop's, but things are looking up for the Redmen. Led by guard Denburk Reid and Derek Armstrong, this is a team with a lot of potential. The two w ill be counted upon to lead a young team that features five rook ies, and McG ill's 5-7 record (0-4 in conference play) underscores the fine balance between talent and inexperi ence that the Redmen possess. Friday's game showed glimpses of greatness. Armstrong ignited the crowd with two impressive dunks in the first half, and guards Daniel Martin and J.P. Begly were deadly from threepoint range. Even the injured Reid put up his seemingly-obligatory 1 8 points. Against Bishop's the Redmen showed they can put the brown thing in the round thing. But what happens at the other end of the court is of press ing concern, according to Assistant Coach Bill MacArthur. "This year's team is younger," he said. "They've learned a whole new defensive system. Right now they need to work on their commitment to the defensive end of the basketball court. W e can't win games when other teams score that many points." Though the Redmen had trouble shutting down the run-and-gun offence of the Gaiters, it was not for lack of effort. To everyone in the crowd, it was apparent that the team was leav ing it all on the court for each of the 20-minute halves. McG ill's Achilles heel this year

may prove to be its lack of an on-court presence, as the team is without a dominant post player. In fact, there is no centre listed on the roster. Despite this, though, the team played bigger than its size would indicate, with 6 '2 " forward G regory Rembeyo grabbing nine rebounds, netting 14 points, and adding three blocked shots against taller and w ider opposition. The hard work put forth against Bishop's gives the Redmen much opti mism. And under new Head Coach C ra ig N o rm a n —former C anadian university coach of the year—there is a sense that the learning curve is steep for this young team. "Right now our team has an opportunity," noted MacArthur. "Our team is very young. Some of the teams, like Laval and Concordia, they've peaked already. W e're going to get better as the season goes on." There may be truth to this state ment, as first-year players Sean Anthony and Begly are starting to make their presence known. Anthony scored 10 points and Begly showed poise when it counted, hitting a threepointer with seven seconds left to keep M cG ill alive. There's reason to believe good things will happen, Armstrong predicts. "W e're on the upswing, and I definitely think we're going to give teams a good run," said the fifth^ear forward, who led the Redmen with 2 4 points on the night. "W e'll bounce back and come out strong. It's still early." The 2 0 0 4 -0 5 edition of the men's basketball team is like a fire cracker. It's pretty harmless at first glance, but can explode when lit. It appears that an enthusiastic crowd is going to help ignite this team, and when this young squad comes togeth er, fans can expect to see quite an aer ial display. ■

In 2 0 0 3 -0 4 , M cG ill played host to the Canadian Interuniversity Sport women's national ice hockey tournament. Though the Martlets fared well on home ice, nabbing a bronze medal for their efforts, some thing was amiss. McG ill's women were unable to topple the University of O ttawa for the Quebec Student Sport Federation title, and limped into the national tourney by virtue of their position as hosts. This year the Martlets again will host the CIS championship, but are set on earn ing their w a y into the national title hunt. If the first two months of this sea son are any indication, the road to national gold may run through Quebec. In addition to the Martlets, ranked sixth in the country, the QSSF is home to ■fifth-ranked O ttawa and N o. 7 Concordia, against whom M cG ill faced off on Sunday after noon at McConnell Arena. In a typi cally hard-fought effort by both squads, the Stingers topped the Martlets 3-1, a loss that came on the heels of a 6-1 defeat at the hands of O ttaw a the previous night. This weekend's results set the stage for a season in which M cG ill knows exact ly whom it is gunning for if it hopes to compete at both the provincial and national level.

Sunday's game was at turns encouraging and dispiriting. M cG ill held off a strong Concordia attack w ith superb penalty killing and strong play by rookie netminder Catherine Herron, w ho stopped 30 of the 35 shots she faced. The disap pointment came on the other end of the ice where, save for an early goal by fourth-year veteran Katherine Safka to knot the game at 1-1, the Martlets failed to capitalize on their numerous scoring chances. The inability to solve the Concordia goaltender was the difference in the game. "W e had opportunities, but w e did not put the puck in the net. That's why w e lost," explained Safka. The scoring drought through which the Martlets suffered this week end has been frustrating for a team that is capable of lighting up the opposition's red light with frequency. M cG ill concluded their East Coast road trip last Sunday with an 8-5 win over St. Mary's, and potted 12 goals against an overmatched Carleton University squad earlier this season. W ith hockey being the twow a y game that it is, the impotent offence took its toll on the other end. "It was not a good weekend for us offensively, so it's hard to play well defensively," said Herron after the Concordia loss. "W e missed many chances, but it was a good

goaltending duel. The other goalie did very well and I did my best." But don't be fooled into singling out the offence as a pressing con cern for this team. Head Coach Peter Smith believes his squad is a work in progress in all aspects of the game, a challenge to which the Martlets are responding. "This is a year of development, and w e're working to play our best hockey all the w ay to the nationals," he said. "There are many things to adjust—our team is learning as we go along, but w e are doing a good job." The Martlets view this season with a long-term perspective, and hope to hit their stride in time for when the provincial and national hardware are made available. "The expectations are very high," said Smith. "W e are fortunate to have Concordia and O ttaw a as opponents in the division. The play ers want to be competitive every time out. I think that's a sign of matura tion." Safka, on the other hand, sum marizes the team's goals more suc cinctly. "O ur goals are the same as last year," she confirmed. "W e want to win the QSSF championship as well as the nationals." — W ith files from Danriy Nguyen

IW O N A LINK

The Martlets were solid in front of rookie goalie Catherine Herron, but still fell to Concordia

Disagree with something we said? Don't get all Artest-y; send us hate mail or contribute to the section-before we go David Stern on your ass. sports@tribune.mcgill.ca

2 2 sports | 23.11.04 | the mcgill tribune

PREVIEW

TWO- POI NT CONVERSI ON

Thorne, Martlets thinking big

The Bolts and the Beautiful

Cagers h o p e pair o f six-footers can

Sports a n d soaps are m ore similar than you think

bring b a ck Q u e b e c title

R IC KI G U R W IT Z As a female Torontonian and a sports fan, I grew up enamoured with all things M aple Leaf, purple dinosaur fever, and not surprisingly, Andy Roddick. And while men may have scoffed at my obsession with the tennis hottie, they didn't question the legitima cy of my fandom. However, when I made it known that my other life-con suming passion was soap operas, my declaration was met with confused looks and doubtful expressions. How could I have the same level o f interest in daytime TV—forever labelled "a wom an th in g "—and sports, which are largely directed at a male audience? The simple answer: sports are soap operas for men. N o w boys, I know you may be gasping aloud, your manly image for ever tainted by the mere comparison to such a chick pastime, but relax, and I shall explain. First, professional sports are made up of continuously evolving storylines, much like their more femi nine equivalents. So keeping up to date is very important, and one does this by perusing Sports Illustrated, a magazine quite similar to its counter part, Soap Opera Digest. M any of the stories you'll find in SI concern two rivals with a long and colourful history, and when they're

scheduled to do battle, sports fans everywhere tune in to watch the ensu ing drama unfold. N o bo dy wants to miss the next time the Pistons and Pacers tangle and the same can be said of The Young and the Restless. W hen 1:3 0 rolls around, fans are glued to the screen when the prominent Newman family, led by the ruthless Victor, squares off against Jack Abbott and his clan. They bring their fight to the boardroom, where opposing busi nesses become the subject of gripping television—not unlike the Yankees-Red Sox corporate battle, except that Steinbrenner's a lot less telegenic than Peter Bergman. The inevitable triumph of one party in an ongoing feud over another, in both soaps and sports, makes for excellent viewing. Next, often in soap operas, love triangles become very complex, taking up Ipts of airtime and sparking much debate. Fans must decide where their loyalties lie and which character they want to see end up lucky in love. Now, such a storyline may seem quite distant from the sports world, but I assure you it is not. Take, for instance, the over publicized bad blood between Kobe and Shaq this summer. Although not competing for a lover's attention, they formed a triangle with the Laker team placed squarely in the middle. Both players were fighting for the position of team superstar, and after a long wait, ,

which included surprise twists and con siderable speculation from the media, Kobe was crowned the winner. But don't worry fans, Shaq has promised to come back with a vengeance... Another enthralling aspect of sports is that the athletes have skills far above those of the average couch potato, and the same can be said of soap opera actors. Although their act ing abilities are underrated, they are very talented and versatile—crying on demand or faking a slap in the face, for instance. They must cope with amnesia, an affair, and a paternity test all in one episode—basically, a day in the life of Shawn Kemp. In both gen res, the main players surprise their audi ence at every turn, always keeping them in suspense about what will come next. The purpose here is not to get all men to watch soap operas, or every woman to start sporting hockey jer seys—I realize that may be going a lit tle far. However, it is impossible to deny the obvious similarities between the two genres, and hopefully the stig ma of the "male" football game and the "female" soap opera may be less ened ever so slightly. After all, Shaq beating Kobe in LA would make for excellent television, as would Jack retal iating against Victor's latest scheme. And I'm sure we'll all tune in next time to find out. ■

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MARTLETS

BASKETBALL

YASEMIN EMORY

Julianne Noseworthy (22) rises above the competition for the Martlets. A N D R E W SEG AL At six feet, four inches, rookie centre Julianne Noseworthy stands head and shoulders above the other nine players on the basketball court. However, second-year head coach Ryan Thorne is optimistic that the Kanata, Ontario native will help the Martlets tower over the rest of the Quebec conference when the 20 0 4 0 5 season wraps up. "Realistically, w e expect to win this thing," said Thorne, despite a 705 2 loss to Bishop's on Friday night that dropped M cG ill to 0-3 in leaguë play and 0-9 overall. "The whole confer ence is open. There's not a dominant team in it right now. A lot of our [early] losses came against top-ranked teams, so w e'll be fine." The Martlets will fall well short of this goal, though, if their performances on a regular basis are reminiscent of Friday's outing against the Gaiters. M cG ill allow ed Bishop's to make nine three-pointers in the first half and failed to score in the final seven minutes, as the squad from Lennoxville jumped out to 37 -19 lead at the break. W hile the Martlets came alive offensively at the start of the second half, their porous defence allowed Bishop's too many open looks and second chances, snuffing any possibility of a rally, Thorne chalked this up to his team's immaturity. "W e were playing against a team with a lot of fourth- and fifthyear players, they're experienced, they're poised, and we're not," he said. "And when you are inexperienced, you have lapses. Turnovers are killing us, and that's a result of inexperience." Indeed, the Martlets did lose several key players from last year's group that finished 6-10 in conference play, the team's highest winning percentage since 1996-97. Graduated are guard Cheeka Mitchell and forward AnneM arie Scherrer, and sidelined by injury is last year's second-leading scorer and rebounder, Sarah Gagné. Though Gagné is bringing her expertise to the team as an assistant coach, Thorne noted that her absence really hurt the Martlets' game plan for the season. “Sarah's loss was unexpected," he said. "She was supposed to play this year, and then she had knee surgery. W e found that out in August.

She's a talented player, so [we were] building around her." Stepping into the void, though, is guard Keify-Rae Kenyon w ho returns a ^er missing the 2 0 0 3 -0 4 season w hile studying in S w eden—and Noseworthy, w ho scored 2 4 points against the nationally-ranked Laval Rouge et O r in a game earlier this season and has been strong on the boards. "Julianne was a top recruit, we went after Lier really bard, and I think sf>e H be the rookie of the yeai Thorne said. She has a great attitude, aRb the best is yet to come from her " Size UP front 3 hey to success Thorne stated that bringing Noseworthy to the program is part of his drive to make the Martlets bigger and allow them to compete not only in Quebec, but nationwide. To do this, though, the Martlets need to play to their forte, and not be sloppy with the basketball or take bad shots, W h a t w e re looking for is interior P^aY> he said. "[It's] our biggest strength, and thats why our focus is to 9 ° inside-out. O ur plan f ° r the future of this program is to be big, Thorne added, I m not aiming to win the conference, !'m trying to win a national championship, and if you look out west, being big is the w a y to do that. So we brought in Julianne this year and we're 9 ° in9 *o bring in another young woman w hos 6 3 next year, Although her play can be inconsistent, Noseworthy has put up solid overall numbers while endorsing her coachs philosophy, W e re trying to go big," she said- "[Leading scorer and fellow sixfooter Alisen] Salusbury and I, w e try and work inside and look for opportunities, because w e are one of the big9er teams in the conference." ■ As Lier rookie campaign prograsses, Noseworthy plans to work on improving her execution and her presence on defence, as well as providing encouragement for her teammates, She believes that all of this will lead to a title before her time at M cG ill is done. "W e can definitely go for a championship, she said. All this rebuilding is going in the right direcLion, ancf hopefully heading towards a championship. ■

the mcgill tribune | 23.11.04 | sports 2 3

STAN DI NGS HOCKEY (M)

OTL

PTS

Concordia

O UA FAR EAST 7

McGill

B-BALL (M)

Ottawa

UQTR

Concordia

PTS

R O U N D THE HORN

PTS

B-BALL (W) Concordia

Laval

Bishops

Bishop's

U Q ÀM

McGill

UQÀM

Hockey Redmen split games on road trip The men's hockey team traveled up the 401 this week end for two games in Ontario University Athletics action. The road trip garnered mixed results for the Far East division-lead ing Red 'n' W hite, as they dropped a 4-2 decision to York before thumping Guelph 8-4. M cG ill's Pierre-Luc Gosselin opened the scoring at 1 3 :1 9 of the first period, but the game swung in York's favour in the next frame. Both teams picked up their play, with M cG ill recording 14 shots on goal, one more than the host Lions, but it was York who succeeded in lighting up the scoreboard, solving Redmen goaltender Patrice Godin twice in the • second period. The Lions, who sit atop the O U A M idwest division, extended their lead to 4-1 in the third before Doug O rr netted a power-play goal with less than 9 0 seconds remaining in the game to close out the scoring. The next night saw the Redmen travel to Guelph, where they handily defeated the host Gryphons by a score of 8-4. As of press time, further details were not available.

OUA MID EAST Toronto

RMC

Queen's

Ryerson

Playoff formats: Men's hockey—division winners and the four next best teams, regardless of division, qualify for the playoffs. Basketball (men and women)—the top four teams qualify for the playoffs.

BOX SCORE

O N DECK REDAAEN H O C KEY-Laurier @ M cG ill, Sat. Nov. 27, 7pm, McConnell Arena The men's hockey team returns to the barn for its final homestand of 2 0 0 4 , and they're aiming to head into the new year by reclaiming the top spot in the Far East. VANIER CUP—Laval vs. Saskatchewan, Sat. Nov. 27, 1pm on TSN The Quebec champion Rouge et O r defend their title against the Huskies of the C anada W est conference. The game will be played for the first time at Ivor W ynne Stadium in Hamilton. NFL—Thurs. Nov. 25, Colts @ Lions, 12:30pm on CBS; Bears @ Cowboys, 4 :1 5pm on Fox The NFL's Thanksgiving tradition continues, with Detroit and Dallas resuming their duties as holiday hosts for the turkey day cel ebrations. If you feel like celebrating the holidays with family, tune in to the late game for a matchup of brothers Thomas and Julius Jones. NHL— Bruins @ Canadiens, Game 7 of the 1 9 7 9 W ales Conference final, W ed. Nov. 2 4 , 7pm on TSN In lieu of actual NHL hockey, Canada's sports leader has been airing the classics, and this matchup between Boston and Montreal was a dandy. Check out M cG ill law grad Ken Dryden between the pipes for the Habs.

M artlet V-ball squad fails to medal at tourney The women's volleyball team put together a strong show ing at the Omnium Vert & O r this weekend, posting a 2-1 record in round robin play before a semi-final loss to' the Université de Montréal. M cG ill started the tournament off on the right foot, sweeping their first two opponents in three sets each. In the first match, Christine Borisov led the Martlets with 15 kills and Maxime Lefebvre paced the squad with 21 digs against McAbbott, a team comprised of former M cG ill and John Abbott players. M cG ill followed that up with a win over Université du Québec à Trois-Rivières, with Emily Doran reg istering 10 kills for the Red 'n' W hite. After, a three-set loss to host Sherbrooke, M cG ill was overcome by the Carabins in the semi-final, losing in four sets. G illian Johnson led the Martlets with eight'kills in the match, and Borisov added six on her w ay to being named to the all-tournament team.

Concordia Stingers 3 @ McGill Martlets 1 Sunday, Novem ber 21 at McConnell Arena SCORING SUMMARY First Period: 1. Concordia - Genevieve Dupuis (M.P. Cantin-Drouin, R. Dupuis) 0 1 :5 9 2. M cG ill - Kathryn Safka (V. Lapierre, V. Paquette) 0 4 :2 6 PENALTIES: Concordia - S. Beaudry (Hold) , 1 1:45 M cG ill - j. Lepage (Hold) , 17:21 M cG ill - P. Donohue (Knee) , 17 :54 Concordia - J. Gosse (Trip) , 18 :44 Second Period: 3. Concordia - Dominique Rancour (S. Roy, R. Dupuis) 18 :15 PENALTIES: M cG ill - L. Ruhnke (High-stick) , 0 8 36 Concordia - BENCH (Too M any Men) , 10:12 Concordia - M .H . DeBlois (Trip) , 10 :55 M cG ill - j. Carlton (Hook) , 14:44

Redmen V-ballers take one of four against beasts of the East The men's-volleyball team won its first match of the sea son on a four-game road trip against Atlantic teams in inter locking play this weekend, but that was all the Redmen had to show for the East Coast swing, losing their final three games. M cG ill started off by defeating Université de Moncton in four sets on Saturday before falling to Memorial University later that night. Sunday was a rough day for the Redmen, as they were swept by both Dalhousie University and the University of N e w Brunswick. Paul Grinvalds led the Redmen in kills in all four games, registering a gaudy total of 5 8 over the weekend.

Third Period: 4 . Concordia - Angela Di Stasi (D Rancour, I. Caron) 13 :45 PENALTIES: M cG ill - V. Lapierre (Rough) , 0 6 :3 9 Concordia - L. McPbee (Rough) , 0 6 :3 9 M cG ill - K. Leuszler (Hit From Behind) , major & game, 16:53 GOALTENDERS McGill: Catherine Herron (L, 6 0 :0 0 , 3G A, 3 0 saves) Concordia: Cecilia Anderson (W, 6 0 :0 0 , IG A , 2 7 saves) SHOTS BY PERIOD 1 2 3 Total M cG ill 7 9 12 28 Concordia 15 11 7 33

GREY CUP TRIVIA M C G IL O E W .C A

—compiled by M ohit Arora

Vanier Cup matchup set Saturday afternoon saw the two entrants in this year's Vanier Cup decided, with a pair of M cG ill nemeses earning the right to compete for the national football title. Defending champions Laval will try to repeat against the Saskatchewan Huskies, who left the Redmen one game short title match in 2 0 0 2 by defeating them at Molson Stadium. The Rouge et O r gained their berth by knocking off O U A champion W ilfred Laurier University 30-1 1 in the Uteck Bowl. Running back Jeronimo Huerta-Flores led the charge with a 161-yard, tw o touchdown performance. Saskatchewan enters the title game after defeating the AUS champion St. Mary's Huskies 31 -16 in the Mitchell Bowl. The Vanier Cup takes place Saturday at 1pm in Hamilton.

INTRAMURAL CORNER

W in Sheldon ♦ U3 Management ♦ Men's Rowing

Q; Why did you take this fall off from the team? A: I took this fall off to actually focus for an entire semester on academics and to not get behind. The first three years o f university i found that I did as little work as possible for the first month and a half of school because of the time commitment of row ing. The other part is that t wanted to be able to go out at night. Q : W hat's it like having a life again? A: I’ve definitely enjoyed it a b t. The funniest thing has been going out at night and having people so surprised to

see me out. They see me and ask, "Don't you have to get up in like tw o hours?" It’s fun to be able to say that 1can sleep in. Q: Do you miss being part of the team? A: I miss rowing to a cer tain degree. I drove and w atched a couple of the regattas. W atching the guys compete and understanding what they go through, there are pangs of jealousy when I see them doing well. I miss the camaraderie, but I also became better friends with people outside of rowing, so there's a give and take.

O n Sunday, the Toronto Argonauts defeated the BC Lions 27 -1 9 to win the Grey Cup. That's an easy one— but how well do you know your G rey Cup history? 1. The Cup is named for Lord Earl Grey, who donated the trophy in 1909. W h a t post did he hold in Canada at the time?

Basketball — Men's Division B playoffs Manaba

W h e re Is M y Sunday

N o v 2 7 , 6 :3 0 p m

G Unit

2. In what four-year period was the G rey Cup not contest ed? 3. H ow many G rey Cup championships has Toronto won?

Cobra Kai

Nov 28, 4:30pm

Sharpshooters

4 . W h o was the starting quarterback for BC in Sunday's game? 5. In 19 62 , this Cup was played, over two days after being suspended due to the harsh Canadian weather. W h a t would this game eventually be nicknamed? |Mog 6o_] ©ujj^ ç uosuepiQ 9L

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Mounties David Blumenthal Nov 24, 8:30pm Clipper:

Nov 27, 7:30pm

Canada's Search for the Coors Light Maxim CM

FEEL LIKE A KID IN A CANDY, MANDY, BRANDY AND SANDY STORE. (YOU BE THE JUDGE.)

Vancouver October 18 Caprice Might Club

Thunder Bay November 5 The Outpost

Windsor November 20 The Thirsty Scholar

Calgary October 24 Outlaws Nitedub

Ottawa November 8 Capital Music Hall

Montreal November 25 Complexe Millennium

Edmonton October 26 The Standard

Toronto November 10 This is London

Quebec City November 27 Le Palace

Regina October 29 New Yorx

London November 14 Club Phoenix

Moncton December 1 Oxygen Night Club

W innipeg November 3 Cowboys

Hamilton November 17 Fever Night Club

Halifax December 3 The N ew Palace

You have a chance to win a judge's seat at the Regional Finals

Visit www.coorslighi.ca for details. No product purchase necessary. Must be legal drinking age. Dates/venues subject to change without notice