The McGill Tribune Vol. 24 Issue 22 by The Tribune

O P IN IO N : T h e professional stu d en t-lib rary over life?

Curiosity delivers. Vol. 24 Issue 22

A&E: M o u rn in g G o n zo journalist H u n te r S. Thom pson.

T r ib u n e

SPORTS: Fed up with the Oscars? Try this sportistic twist.

Wednesday, March 2. 2005

B u d g e t m a k e s c o m p r o m is e s But was education left out in the cold by the federal minority government MAX SHAPIRO W hen the federal government unveiled its first minority budget in 25 years last week, it aimed to please with spending promises and tax cuts. Student groups, however, were not impressed. In his budget address to the House of Commons, Finance Minister Ralph Goodale announced the Liberal parly's eighth consecu tive balanced budget and touted the fact that Canada's economic performance is the strongest among the Group of Seven industrial ized nations. "This is the longest unbroken string of sur pluses since Confederation," said Goodale. Conspicuously absent from the fanfare of the budget's release was any significant feder al investment in education. Although the budg et pledged $375-million over five years to three federal agencies that provide research grants, there were no major funding announcements for post-secondary students. The Canadian Federation of Students issued a press release accusing the government of reneging on its 2 0 0 4 election promises to students. "During the election [Prime Minister] Paul Martin promised to restore core funding by cre ating a dedicated transfer payment for post-sec ondary education of $7- to $ 8-billion, said CFS National Chairperson George Soule. "He broke that promise today." Soule pointed to numbers from a recent Statistics Canada Youth in Transition Survey that showed more than 5 0 ,0 0 0 qualified young Canadians are denied access to post-second ary education each year because of financial hardship. The C anadian Alliance of Student Associations labeled the budget as "anti-social toward students. "I don't see how the government can merely pick and choose which major promises

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they would like to fulfill, let alone major social funding promises such as post-secondary edu cation," said CASA National Director Jamie Kusie. M cG ill Students' Society Vice-President (Community and Government) Daniel Friedlaender was equally disappointed that education was "relatively ignored" by the feder al government. "Due to the minority setting, the govern ment seems to have caved to many Conservative demands in an effort to not be toppled, which has resulted in lots of money being put toward the military and tax cuts and hardly any attention given to the education port folio," he said. Liberal M cG ill President Devon Kirk agreed - that there could have been more emphasis on education. "I know the Liberal Party is fundamentally committed to education as a universal right, but I also know they were faced with tremendous constraints in making this budget—both eco nomic and political," Kirk said. Kirk noted that "the federal and provincial Liberals are very separate and that many edu cation issues are well beyond the control of the federal government.” Broader reaction was mixed. Antonia M aioni, director of the M cG ill Institute for the Study of Canada, saw the budg et as moving ahead on Liberal promises while at the same time reaching out to opposition par ties. "It's not an arrogant budget," she told CBC. "It's a minority government budget." Surprisingly, the most supportive opposi tion leader was Conservative Stephen Harper, who said "there's nothing in the budget that would justify an election at this time." "If you look at the major initiatives in this budget... they're really tax reduction and

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IN T E R V IE W

A look at FEUQ

A r e Q u e b e c s tu d e n ts ' p ro te s ts b e in g h e a r d ? well as the government's use of students as "lab rats" to test its "destructive reforms."

TRIBUNE PHOTOGRAPHER

LAURA SABA ince the provincial government cut $ 103-million from student financial aid last fall, Quebec students, led by various student organizations, have been staging demonstrations against Premier Jean Charest and former Education Minister Pierre Reid in efforts to have the amount reinstated. Students began by peacefully voicing their protests against the redistribution of $ 103-million from bursaries to loans, but in the past few months, their actions have become more aggressive. The Tribune high lights the actions taken against the provincial government.

Calling it in In October, La Fédération Étudiante Universitaire du Québec began a phone campaign, urging students to call members of the National Assembly and protest the cuts. Students' Society Vice-President (Community and Government) Daniel Friedlaender active ly supported the campaign, setting up phones in the lobby of the Shatner University Centre and calling on students to participate. W hile this effort was initially keenly pur sued, SSMU's interest in it eventually waned. FEUQ has not ended the campaign, however, and interested students can still take part via the organization's W eb site, www. feuq. qc. ca. Taking to the streets More than 1 0 ,000 Quebec students

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peacefully demonstrated on the streets of Quebec and Montreal on November 10, the same day that Charest and Reid defended the cuts to the National Assembly. The stu dents asked for the $ 103-million back even as Charest said that Quebec currently enjoys the most generous loans and bursaries system in North America. Less than 2 0 0 of the students in atten dance were from M cG ill, and SSMU Provincial Affairs Commissioner Ashley Becker blamed the lack of commitment to this issue on the part of the current SSMU execu tives.

Shutting the government out A group of FEUQ-led students blocked access to the Ministère de l'Éducation using fences and trees on December 16, but some student associations including SSMU did not agree with this course of action. Friedlaender and Vice-President (Operations) Anthony DiCarlo attempted to ban SSMU members from blocking access to or occupying government buildings, but their proposed motion was killed at the first coun cil meeting of the semester. Letting the mice do the talking The premiers office in Sherbrooke was closed on the afternoon of February 2 while exterminators removed 103 mice that protest ers had released into the building through vents. In an email, the students said the mice were meant to symbolize the amount cut as

Welcoming Charest On February 9, Charest was scheduled to give a speech on healthcare at McGill, but canceled it at the last minute. The Quebec Caucus of the Canadian Federation of Students and McGill's Grassroots Association for Student Power had mobilized a group of Montreal students to demonstrate against the premier, but instead unsuccessfully attempted to access his Montreal offices when he did not turn up/appear. Demonstrators said that Charest did not come to M cG ill because he feared student opposition brought on by the cuts. His spokespeople, however, said that a ministers' meeting in Quebec ran late and held him up. Breaking and entering A week later, a group of about 100 stu dents stormed the hotel where a provincial Liberal caucus was being held in Montebello, Quebec. The students used a wooden battering ram to break hotel doors and windows, and several protesters were injured when police used handcuffs, pepper spray, and batons to control the crowd. Seven arrests were made, and Charest called the incident "intolerable behaviour." Friedlaender issued a statement con demning the use of the battering ram, saying that violent acts were not supported by SSMU and would not achieve students' goals. Looking ahead On February 18, Charest reshuffled his cabinet and demoted Reid, following the reversal of a plan to allocate special funding to Jewish schools in the province. Jean-Marc Fournier, who has already been called upon by both FEUQ and La Fédération Étudiante Collegiale du Québec to reinstate the $ 103million, who argue that the provincial budget allows for it, replaced Reid. Less than a week later, CÉGEP students across the province staged a strike that FECQ had been planning for months. However, Friedlaender said that since Fournier was not responsible for the cuts, he is not under a strict obligation to abide by them. "I think that he can change things, and it's our job to make sure he does," he said. ■

Vikander, keep pressure on Liberals •

YASEM IN EM ORY

efore he joined the executive of la Fédération étudiante universitaire du Québec two years ago, Nick Vikander was Students' Society vice-president community and government. Here, he talks about la FEUQ's evolution and what's next for the Quebec student movement. H o w has la FEUQ's approach to activism changed, especially since last spring's $ 103-million cut to financial aid?

"Overall, the tactics and strategy are similar now to what they were two years ago...[But] this year specifically, there have been more strong actions, demonstrations [and] student strikes. Circumstances have changed in the last year—I think that's dictated us having to raise the level of action." Student activists drew criticism last month when they tried to break down a d oor at a meeting o f the Liberal cau cus. Does aggressive action do more harm than g o o d ? "It had its positive and negative impacts, but it's in the past and we're moving on to different types of things in the future. There's a need for people to work in support [of] each other and in solidarity... Some students are on strike now since last week. M cG ill students are not on strike. It doesn't mean M cG ill is bad as such, but it means different associa tions work in different ways." W hat's next for la FE U Q ? "There's a TV ad that [came out M onday]... the idea being that we want to reach out to the population at large and reinforce the support we think we have against the cuts... There's also grassroots student action all across the province. There are already 3 0 ,0 0 0 students in Quebec who are on strike... A lot of pur work over the next month is going to be supporting [them] logisficaily on the ground." Jean-M arc Fournier has been appointed Quebec's new education minister. H o w does that bode for students? "It was very difficult for students and many other groups to try and deal with [former Education Minister Pierre Reid], Nobody was happy with his performance and he was show ing no flexibility to go back on the $ 103-million in cuts. Having a new education minister... doesn't mean the govern ment's necessarily going to change policy, but it nonetheless provides them an opportunity to do so. W e met with JeanM arc Fournier last week. It was a good first meeting and he said he had a willingness to try and come to some kind of solution to reduce student debt. So that's a positive first sign. But we have the responsibility to keep on applying pressure to the government until there's a concrete offer with a dollar sign.” —Jennifer Jett

SECONDS

Herring in limbo Funding for the Red Herring remains uncertain after the Finance Committee granted the satirical magazine $ 3 0 0 of the $ 1 ,3 4 5 requested on February 15. Red Herring executives meet with SSMU again this week. "Given that there's enough time left and they do give us enough money, we will publish again [this year],” said editor-inchief Daniel Oettl. The Finance Committees minutes cite "pressure" from Dean of Students Bruce Shore as a factor in its decision. Shore said he alerted SSMU acting President Andrew Bryan after an article in the most recent issue containing alleged anti-Semitic comments was brought to his attention. SSMU responded by removing the remaining copies of the Red Herring from stands on February 1 1. The author of the article apologized for the offending material in a February 14 letter to the M c G ill Daily. Shore also took issue with the fact that the Red Herring labeled itself "The M cG ill University Humour Magazine and Satire

Concern." The magazine is not affiliated with the university. W e ve been using that for years, and just now did someone at SSMU notice," said Oettl, who was unaware the slogan vio lates the letter of agreement. Shore said SSMU reacted appropriately to the charges of anti-Semitism. "I welcome the fact that .SSMU lakes its communication with the univer sity very seriously," he said. "It is an organization with great freedom, and with this freedom comes great responsibility." Note to councillors: read your docs Council representation of clubs and services, Residence, Athletics, and Senate/Board caucus will not change. The debate over whether to reduce or eliminate these positions became moot February 17 when council lost quorum. As the meeting entered its seventh hour, not enough councillors were present to vote on the proposed constitutional amendment, part of a series of amend

ments students will vote on starting March 1 1. Because council must approve referendum questions 21 days before the start of advance polling, this amendment will not appear on the ballot. Students will, however, vote on whether to eliminate the positions of treasurer and Board of Governors representative. — Jennifer Jett

T H E

N U M B E R S The cost of eight large piz zas, which SSMU councillors fli ordered at students' expense more §f than five hours into their February | | 17 meeting when it became clear that the meeting would not end I I any time soon.

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th e m cgill tribune | 2.3.05 | new s

SPEAKING

OF...

Canadian

Politics

C a n a d a 's cho ice s on th e w orld s ta g e Minister of Foreign Affairs insists upon focus JESSE GUTMAN Canada must choose its foreign policy wisely or else the country will be overextended, said Minister of Foreign Affairs Pierre Pettigrew at the Canada in the W orld conference on February 1 8. Pettigrew delivered the keynote address at the McGill Institute for the Study of Canada's annual conference, now in its tenth year. The Canada in the W orld conference ran from February 16 to 1 8. Other notable speakers included Minister of Defence Bill Graham, Minister of International Cooperation Aileen Carroll, and US Ambassador to Canada Paul Celluci. Pettigrew's speech was topical, as the Department of Foreign Affairs is cur rently preparing an international policy review. The minister labeled the framework for reviewing Canada's foreign policy, as the politics of choice. "How do we [give foreign aid] effectively without spreading ourselves too thin and trying to do too much?" he said. Canada is universally "considered a faithful and reliable partner almost uniquely seen to have a policy position

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that Canada should actively respond, often above and beyond its relative capacities? He said that this question only requires the exercise of discipline in the face of constant pressures. The government's attempt to dis play a greater commitment to multilater alism was stifled by the House of

"Foreign p olicy-m akin g has alw a y s been difficult in C a n a d a hom elands, a n d o u r relative freedom from obvious a n d im m e d i a te security threats." — M in iste r o f Foreign A ffa irs Pierre Pettigrew

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based on fairness [and] the rule of law, particularly international law,” he told an audience of students and Blackberrytoting bureaucrats. How then, Pettigrew said, is such an altruistic country to deal with rein forced ongoing assumptions brought on by Afghanistan, Haiti, and tsunami relief, yielding immediate expectations

Commons on February 15, he said, when a motion to split the Department of Foreign Affairs and International Trade into two separate portfolios was defeat ed. "Throwing more money at our for eign policy is not, in itself, sufficient," he said. "Our foreign policy needs focus, supported by dedicated resources."

He identified three priorities in his portfolio: strengthening the role of Foreign Affairs, selectively determining a role for Canada in advancing global peace and security, and using the diplo matic service to reform multilateral institu tions such as the G 20. Following the speech, student activists challenged the minister on the RCMP's role in training police in Haiti. Pettigrew answered that Canada will strengthen its presence there. M cG ill History Professor Desmond Morton said he was "too old to take such speeches as expressions of govern ment policy." Morton warned against quick criti cism of Canadian diplomacy. "Foreign policy-making has always been difficult in Canada because of our diversity, our residual loyalties to remem bered homelands, and our relative free dom from obvious and immediate secu rity threats," he said. Pettigrew is the Member of Parliament for Montreal's Papineau rid ing. He was first elected to the House of Commons in 1996. ■

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increases in national defence, which are pretty close to the things we were advocating in the last election,” Harper said. The N e w Democratic Party and the Bloc Québécois were much less sat isfied, however. Jack Layton, leader of the NDP, said he felt betrayed by Paul Martin's government. "N o w what we see is a budget that doesn't invest in education, that doesn't invest in climate change the w ay it should... and instead w e see a corporate tax cut which came out of the blue," said Layton. Bloc leader Gilles Duceppe blast ed the budget as being "totally unac ceptable for Quebec." The budget represents a confi dence vote for the government. If it fails to pass, the Liberals, who lack a major ity because they hold only 135 of 308 seats in the House of Commons, will be forced to call an election. The vote will be held on March 9. W ith minority politics, it is never certain what the out come will be. ■

To check out the full version of the budget, visit w w w .fin .g c .c a / b u d ioce/2 0 0 5 /budliste.htm.

Budget highlights • $ 1 2 .8-billion over the next five years for Canada '4 -military—the largest increase in defence spend ing in two decades... • $ 4 .7-billion ovef five years for the environment, including $ 1-bil lion to cut greenhousf gas emis sions and $200-m ilfeh to boost wind energy use. • Implementing a pledge to share $ 5-billion worth of gôs-tax revenue with municipalities over the next five years. • $ 4 .9-billion in corporate tax breaks and modest across-the-board tax cuts for all Canadians. • $ 5-billion over five years for a

national child-care program. • $ 3 .4-billion more for interna tional assistance over the next five years. • The budget also accounted for billions of dollars promised to the provinces and territories in two agreements signed in the fall—the $ 4 1 .3-billion health care deal, and the $ 33 .4-billion agreement on equalization payments. • Some also hailed the budget as the "greenest" in Canadian history, with $ 3-bi!lion in newly announced spending over five years to cut pol lution, protect national parks, and promote alternative energy.

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Bursting th e K yoto b u b b le The foul stench of futility JOSH WILNER

For only a toonie, you can get o listing in the print and online editions of the Trib. Drop by the SSMu office (Brown Student Building. Suite 1200) to pick up a form Deadlines are Fridays at 3:30pm. For more information, e-mail calenctor@tribune mcgill co

"N o decree w ill solve climate change. There are no short-term answers. But to fight it, this government w ill use every available tool. " -F in a n c e Minister Ralph G ooda le, Feb. 23, as he presented the federal budget to the House o f Commons w o weeks ago, as M cG ill students were writing cling is not so environmentally friendly. their midterms and looking forward to the prom W hat is a "commitment" to Kyoto worth when ise of Reading W eek revelry, the Kyoto Protocol the word "Kyoto" does not even appear in the feder entered into force and became international law. al budget? Gur government has offered no concrete, One hundred and forty-one nations have ratified substantive (or realistic) strategies as to how Canada Kyoto, and the 35 industrialized nations among them will meet its obligation under the treaty of 2 4 0 to 3 0 0 have pledged to reduce their combined greenhouse megatonnes of greenhouse gas abatement by the end gas emissions by an average of about five per cent of the first commitment period. below 19 9 0 levels over the first commitment period of - The quick and dirty is this: it won't. ApologiesTo 2 0 0 8 to 2012 . Rick Mercer, but given historical trends in the rates of In 2 0 0 2 , former prime minister Jean Chrétien change in population growth, GDP per capita, ener decided that he wanted Kyoto as part of his legacy gy intensity of output, and carbon intensity of energy, (defying those big bad Americans was a bonus), and it will be practically (if not physically) impossible for when Paul Martin became prime minister, his govern Canada to meet its mitigation target. ment could not pass up the opportunity to maybe, just That makes the Kyoto Protocol as dead as Hunter maybe, be noticed on the international scene. S. Thompson. One can only hope that this sorry Lots of hands were shaken, many nice things excuse for a treaty will be disposed of in accordance said, there were photo ops galore, and Canada even with what the acclaimed gonzo journalist wished for signed the thing. But when the cameras stopped flash his own remains: the Kyoto Protocol should be burned ing, reality set in. and shot out of a cannon. A Prime Ministers O ffice audit of Canada's pre W hat we need, and what we are not even close vious spending on greenhouse gas abatement found to possessing right now, is a carbon-free energy in December of last year that the 2 0 0 2 implementa source sufficient in magnitude to meet our base-load energy needs. tion strategy, known as the Climate Change Plan for Canada, had fallen apart. Canadas greenhouse gas Improving energy efficiency is only a Band-Aid emissions have increased by 20 per cent since 1990. solution, and investing billions in Kyoto—even if Last week, the Prime M inister—a.k.a. "Mr. undertaken with a green conscience—is staking a Dithers," according to The Economist— came through claim on a sinking ship. Our federal government on his election promise to honour Kyoto by earmark should take the advice of Hoffert et al. (Nature, ing $4-billion in the federal budget for combating cli October 1998) and invest taxpayers' dollars in a mate change. But not so fast! The same PMO audit massive energy technology R&D venture with the found $ 2 .7-billion in Kyoto dough in the federal cof urgency of a Manhattan Project or Apollo space pro gram. ■ fers, unspent from previous budgets. This kind of recy

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health care costs, less sick days." Conservative Society of M cG ill The Kyoto Protocol went into President W illiam Palumbo has a dif effect on February 16, but disagree ferent view on the matter. ment over whether it w ill make a dif "The protocol has a pretty good ference in the global environment con chance to hurt the C anadian econo tinues to grow. my, not help it," he said, explaining To date, 141 countries have that the regulations could discourage signed the treaty, agreeing to combat companies from building plants or global warming by reducing their factories in the country, instead estab greenhouse gas emissions. Canada lishing themselves in countries with ratified Kyoto in December 19 9 2 . Its more lenient policies. own target is to reduce its greenhouse O ne of the biggest problems gas emissions to six per cent lower with Kyoto, Palumbo said, is the fact than 1 9 9 0 levels. Three of the largest that countries can trade emissions producers o f greenhouse gases—the credits. A country whose emissions United States, China, and India — are too high can buy credits from a have not signed on to the agreement. country that has lower emissions, to Questions have been raised as decrease its total emissions without to whether the adoption of Kyoto will making any changes. hurt the C a na dia n economy, as "It's hard to get reliable informa adjusting to the new policies w ill be tion on emissions, and there's a prob costly. lem with not having a terribly influen Greening M c G ill Coordinator tial enforcement bo ard ," Palumbo M ichelle Lee disagrees with that view. said. "I imagine that any change in Lee applauded the Canadian the direction of the economy w ill result government for its actions to help stop in winners and losers," she said, "but global warming, adding that the pub overall, I believe that renewable, non lic must do its part. polluting energy is good for the econ "Every individual can make omy. " choices about energy use and trans According to Lee, the positive portation that w ill increase or impact of Kyoto on the Canadian decrease emissions," she said. "The economy will far outweigh any adjust role o f the public is therefore essen ment costs. tial." "Greater energy efficiency low Palumbo is skeptical. ers everyone's costs in the long run," "The goal of international coop she said. "Fewer emissions leads to eration is promising [but] it is a very better health, which is good for the poor solution to a problem that should econom y in many w a y s —fewer be addressed more completely." ■

C A M P U S

the m cgill tribune | 2.3,05 j news

NEWS

Fresh set of nine to g o v e rn A U S Voter turnout low a t 16 per cent of Arts students EMILY HARRIS Even after the voting period was extended, student apathy reigned in the Arts Undergraduate Society election. The executives for next year were cho sen with a mere 16 per cent voter turnout among Arts students, compared to 21 per cent last year. Three major positions— president, vice-president (academic), and vicepresident (internal)—had already been acclaimed. In the heated three-way race for vice-president (finance), Teo LerouxBlackbum won 34.1 per cent of the vote, finishing 2.5 percentage points ahead of the second-place candidate, M ike Pinsky. "The fact that my opponents were of such high calibre makes me really

received 3 7 .4 per cent. "I think I had the edge in terms of experience, as well as political connec tions and demonstrable achievements," said Itzkowitz. He plans to begin the new year by establishing ties with individuals and groups involved in the political process es on campus. He also would like to continue in the footsteps of out-going Vice-President (External) Jamie FergusonW oods by inviting schools to the Graduate School and Career Fair as early as possible to maximize turnout. The most pressing issue for Arts students is the current state of advising, said Itzkowitz. "[I plan to] voice Arts concerns in the building of a model for advising and making sure that Arts students are consulted on the shape of whatever sys tem of advising is adopted by the uni

" W h i l e c a m p a ig n in g , h a lf o f th e A r ts students I ta lk e d to h a d n e v e r e v e n h e a r d o f A U S ,"

— Corey Shefman, Arts Representative Elect appreciate the position, and take it all the more seriously," Leroux-Blackbum said. Her first priority is to develop a good rapport with the other incumbent executives and to learn as much as pos sible from outgoing vice-president (finance) Andrea Navin. Jacob Itzkowitz was elected vicepresident (external) with 5 4 per cent of the vote. The runner-up, M ike Dineen,

versity," he said. Gillian Prendergast was elected vice-president (communications) with 56.1 per cent of the vote. Her oppo nent, Lisa Ross, received 36.1 per cent. Prendergast's first step in the upcoming year will be to closely exam ine the AUS table-booking policy. "I've heard many complaints about the current table-booking policy

and its need to be revamped," she said. "I'd like to make significant changes with how it currently functions to make it easier for student groups to rent tables for fundraising and other functions." The new AUS executives have their work cut out for them, she said. "There are many challenges fac ing the AUS next year—among them the tuition increase situation, the AUS budget, and the beer sponsorship agreement," she said. "Students won't know [about AU$ initiatives and events] without more visibility and more exchange between the students and AUS." The three positions for Arts repre sentative to the Students' Society went to M ax Silverman (25.3 per cent), Kay Turner (23.1 per cent) and Corey Shefman (16 .9 per cent). Shefman beat the fourth-place candidate, Chris Sullivan, by a single vote. Turner and Shefman ran together on a slate with Itzkowitz. Turner noted that the low voter turnout was a major factor in the fiveperson race, resulting in a large split ting of the vote. "This was a difficult race as the majority of the candidates were similar ly qualified and talented,” she said. "It was a very close race in which every vote counted—had there been a larger voter turnout, we could have been look ing at a very different set of elected individuals." Other candidates had the same impression.

JULIA SHONFIELD

Teo Leroux-Blackbum was elected AUS vice-president (finance). "In terms of average voter turnouts at M cG ill, 16 per cent is fairly aver age," Shefman said. “[But] that is not to say it's high enough." He said that the use of the Online Voting System makes casting a vote easy for students and added that it was upsetting more students did not do so. As such, Shefman said that the greatest challenge facing AUS is creating more of an interest among the students it rep resents. "W hile campaigning, half of the

Arts students I talked to had never even heard of AUS," he said. "The other half, while they'd heard about it, had absolutely no idea what it did. I would say that less than 10 per cent of Arts students have a good idea of what AUS does for them." Based on his experience cam paigning, Shefman said that AUS must strive to increase visibility and "get more students interested and involved and actually make a name for the organization." ■

Choose from hundreds of day and evening Arts and Science courses Pick up credits toward your degree at your home university Take advantage of U of T s great libraries and athletic centres Experience the excitement of summer in Toronto

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The Board of Governors has approved Physics Department Chair and James M cG ill Professor Martin Grant to succeed Dean of Science Alan Shaver, whose term ends in May. Grant said he will be looking closely at several issues of concern to students, among them the introduction of two new programs, undergraduate research opportunities, and the status of undergraduate laboratories. The new programs, Earth Systems Science and Space Science, w ill provide students with the opportu nity to study research areas spanning several fields. "I think that's [an] opportunity— you can get an interdisciplinary back ground, which is essential," said Grant. Earth Systems Science will inte grate facets from a few departments, but w ill be structured around the sci ence of the environment. The Space Science program is being motivated by changes within the field itself. "The next generation of [astro physics] is going to address funda mental issues of -physics—that's our pitch for astrophysics," Grant said. "[The plan] is not to do astronomy, but to do real quantitative astrophysics." Grant said that research should be better incorporated within the Faculty o f Science undergraduate degree. "I like the idea of undergraduate research a lot and w e're trying to push it," he said. "At the least professors can integrate their research into their lectures and explain the link [with course material]." O ne change Grant said is in the cards is a plan to set up an undergrad uate research office. Christopher Lee, vice-president (academic) for the Science Undergraduate Society, sees

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the office being set up within the con text of larger changes. "The Student Affairs O ffice , Dawson Hall, [is] being split," he said. "Science is going to have its own SAO. Realistically, the under graduate research office might come out of a new Science SAO." Lee said that while such an office might not create research opportuni ties for students, it could make them more accessible. In terms of the present enrolment rate within the Faculty of Science, Grant said he foresees neither an increase nor decrease in the number of admissions. "The number of students is pegged at a specific number," he said. "W e couldn't double the enroll ment if w e wanted to without doubling the lab space." W hile Grant said increasing lab space is not an immediate priority, investments in undergraduate laborato ries might take place in another form. "The priority I have is not to increase the size but to increase the quality of the undergraduate labs," he said. Grant's own research and per sonal interests are reflected in some of the courses he has taught in recent years, such as Advanced Statistical Mechanics and Musical Acoustics. He is a theoretician w ho studies the prop erties of material science systems that are far from equilibrium—non-equilibri um statistical mechanics. W hen Grant is not occupied with matter models or administrative issues, he said he enjoys spending time with his band, The Red Shift Blues, which he formed with fellow physics profes sors Charles G ale and David Hanna. "It's so amazing that these physi cists can crank it up," he said. Grant will officially take over dean of Science responsibilities on June 1. ■

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Up to S p e e d ___________ ’

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Blaring soon, from a screen near you: TVMcGill is now being loudly broadcast on four television screens in the r Shatner University Centre. • Infuriating Red Sox fans everywhere: The new owner of the Boston Fleet Center is selling 24J * hour naming rights for the sports arena on eBay to raise money liflfli,® . » for the Jimmy Fund, the official Red Sox charity. A Manhattan Efcjwr*' lawyer Won the fight for M atch 1 and decided to name the cen ter after N e w York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter. • Keeping the .•W i: • Yankees Out of Boston: After much controversy, a friend of the lawyèr eventually trumped his bid and the name JimmyFundCenter I was agreed upon. • Giving new meaning to the w ord "birdbrain": M cG ill scientist Louis Lefebvre has discovered that crows and jays: » « V f have the highest IQ on the bird scale. The research w a s based on •ftr ¥ the feeding behaviour of birds in the wild. • Expecting sympathy pains: Scientists across the world are researching Couvade v O : Syndrome, a phenomenon experienced by 1T per cent of expectant ■ : fathers, thought to be brought on by anxiety about the impending : , birth. These men experience morning sickness, backaches, and # ;« p weight gain while their partners are pregnant, and as the birth draws nearer, hormonal changes are detected. • Going through the trash: An Indiana café employee found a discarded lottery tick Ww I et in a trash can, which turned out to be a US$ 1 0 0 ,0 0 0 winning ticket, lotrery officials believe a store clerk told the original tic.k: T ill « - it ! e* ^°U e r that the numbers were not a winning combination for „ t I I $ 4 0 , but did not check for any other combinations. • N ot try-fftlfti If ing to hook a man: A Japanese poll shows that most single r women are happily single and would rather be unmarried. The country's falling birthrates, however, have been an fU T p % Â ïÛ ongoing concern for the government. ■ I fo r h im m m SOURCES: ASSOCIATED PRESS, BBC.CO.UK, FLEETCENTER.COM, PRAVDA.RU, REUTERS, ? * * * | $ | l I* J l l i i Y A H O O .C O M

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T h e S S M U is s e e k i n g s t u d e n t s f r o m A p r i l 3 0 t h u n t il J u n e 3 0 t h t o s e ll a d v e r t i s i n g s p a c e f o r t h e s t u d e n t h a n d b o o k a n d o t h e r p u b lic a tio n s . T h e s e p o s itio n s a r e p r o v e n m o n e y -m a k e r s fo r ta le n te d , d y n a m ic , a r tic u la te in d iv id u a ls w h o c a n c lo s e s a le s . P ro te c te d T e rrito rie s • O nly se rio u s c a n d id a te s n eed ap p ly T H E S E

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To g e t the low dow n, co n tact

PAUL SLACHTA 398-6806

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A n n o u n cem en t of R e fe re n d a Elections McGill will subm it the following SSMU Council-initiated referendum questions to student vote during the 2005 Spring Electoral Period from March 11-16,2005 SSMU CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT 1 W HEREAS the Students' Society of McGill University (SSMU) Legislative Council has reviewed the SSMU Constitution, and has recommended changes to reflect the reality of the Society; WHEREAS the SSMU Legislative Council has reviewed the SSMU Constitution, and has recommended changes to the membership and procedures of Council to more accurately and equally represent members of the Society; WHEREAS any change to the SSMU Constitution must be placed before the members of the Society in a referendum; Do you agree to make the following changes" to the SSMU Constitution, effective May 1,2005?

SSMU CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT 2 WHEREAS the Students' Society Legislative Council (SSMU) Legislative Council has reviewed the SSMU Constitution, and has recommended changes to clarify the procedure in case of resignation, removal, or inability to act of an SSMU Executive Officer; WHEREAS any change to the Constitution must be placed before the members of the Society in a referendum; Do you agree to make the following change" to th e SSMU Constitution, effective May 1,2005? YES / NO *To view th e current a n d rev b e d constitutional articles p le a s e visé www. electionsm cgill.ca/constéu2.pdf

YES / NO *To view th e current a n d re v ise d c o n sté u ib n a l articles p le a s e visé www. electionsmcgill. ca/consi itu1.pdf

SSMU HEALTH AND DENTAL PLAN QUESTION 1 W HEREAS the Students' Society of McGill University (SSMU) Health and Dental plan fee has not increased since January 1st, 1997; W HEREAS in recent s/ears, the volume of claims made by students on the SSMU Health and Dental plan has increased by approximately 15% annually; W HEREAS if the current level of SSMU Health and Dental plan fee is unaltered, students will continue to see a progressive decrease in coverage; W HEREAS the SSMU has the intention to maintain approximately the same level of plan coverage for the next four (4) years; Do you agree to increase the current SSMU Health and Dental plan fee paid by students by $36,13 (pro rated to th e applicable Health or Dental component) in order to maintain the approximate current level o f plan coverage? Y E S /N O

______________ ___ _______________ _

CALL FOR REFERENDUM COMMITTEES Students have the opportunity to form YES and 'NO' Referendum Committees for the questions in the upcoming 2005 Spring Electoral Period. Referendum Committee Kits are now available at our office, Suite 405 Shatner University Centre, or online a twww.electionsmcgill.ca/nominations.htm. SSMU Council has struck Yes Committees for both constitutional amendments. Completed kits must be submitted by Friday March 4

SSMU HEALTH AND DENTAL PLAN QUESTION 2 WHEREAS in the future the Students' Society of McGill University (SSMU) Health and Dental plan may require small annual adjustments to offset rising health care and dental care costs and in order to maintain a given level of cos/erage; Do you authorize the Students* Society of McGill University (SSMU) Legislative Council to increase the cost of the SSMU Health and Dental plan by a maximum o f 10% per annum? YES / NO

SSMU HEALTH AND DENTAL PLAN QUESTION 3 WHEREAS currently only students covered by another comparable extended health and dental plan have the right to opt-out of the Students' Society of McGill University (SSMU) Health and Dental plan; WHEREAS allowing the option to opt-out of the plan without providing proof of comparable coverage would increase the premium of the plan by approximately $40 (or 25%); WHEREAS many students opt-out of SSMU fees because they are financially constrained; Do you agree that students should be allowed to opt-out of the SSMU Health and Dental plan without proof of coverage from a comparable plan? YES / NO

opinion

A cadem ic dis-integrity a t McGill? JEREMY C O O P E R S T O C K

The seed s of workaholism W ork is a fine thing if it doesn't take too much o f your spare time. " — Anonymous

any M cG ill students did little reading the generosity of certain instructors that exam questions last week. Despite the university's best are ever hinted at in advance. efforts to cast "spring" break in an aca Although taking school seriously may be applaud demic light, it is widely accepted that ed, the idea that being a student is a job neglects much our so-called Reading W eek is the time of what student life should be about. Professional student to do anything but school work. For a select group of syndrome contradicts the tenet that education is valudedicated students, however, having last week off did . able in itself. Contrast a sincere interest in learning with n't mean a break from the books. N ot every student wel the professional students reasoning that studying is comed the week for the opportunity to consume copious important purely because it will return good grades, amounts of alcohol with classmates, without having to and, by extension, admission to graduate school. attend class hung over the next day. Instead, some stu Realistically, simply having high marks does mean dents viewed the time aw ay from class as a chance to admission to many post-graduate programs. Does that get ahead in their courses. mean you should be studying more, mimicking the The student who treats school as a workaholic behaviour of those blossoming workaholics who treat would approach a job can be dubbed a "professional school as a career? Don't despair if your GPA isn't student." In circles of friends, there is often at least one 3 .8 9 . ^ person willing to forgo partying on the weekend to Even if grades will get students some places, they are no guarantee. Competitive graduate programs in journalism, for instance, consider more than an appli A lth o u g h ta k in g sc h o o l s e rio u s ly m a y b e cant's GPA. The reason isn't difficult to discern: extracur ricular activities are among the most valuable aspects of a p p la u d e d , th e id e a th a t b e in g a s tu d e n t is a student life, up there with learning for learning's sake. jo b n eg le cts m u ch o f w h a t s tu d e n t life s h o u ld Activities, shunned by the one-dimensional professional b e a b o u t. student who is too busy studying, produce skills. Leading or being a member of a student club is a time commit ment, but that fosters time management skills. In other study. This individual stresses over the smallest assign words, it's impossible to study compulsively, so what ments, incapable of putting them into perspective. time is spent working had better be more efficient. Skills Driven to be at the top of the class, the professional stu are necessary to secure an internship—which can only dent steadfastly holds the belief that an immaculate tran be viewed as an asset by professional schools. The script is the key to being a "professional" once "student" result, after years of school, should be job acquisition. is dropped. Extracurricular activities necessarily take By avoiding a balanced student life, the profession time aw ay from school work, and are therefore al student is also closing the door on another benefit of shunned. Like the devoted employees they are on their being absorbed in more than books: networking oppor w ay to becoming, a vacation is the time to inhabit the tunities offered by extracurricular pursuits. The library—a workplace—not relax. Workaholism has Government of Canada may have a university recruit taken root. ment program—a database for students nearing gradu W hile professional students can usually blend in ation which asks for GPA and neglects extracurricu with other faces in the classroom, they are easy to iden la r. Yet considering the importance of personal connect tify during midterm season, such as the weeks that booktions, isn t the individual who has been active in the end spring break. These gradeoriented achievers youth wing of a political party more likely to secure a assume that professors and teaching assistants should job than the professional student? support fanatical work habits. For example, the profes An undergraduate degree is not enough, more sional student is not satisfied after the format of a test has often than not. Studying to the detriment of all else been announced. He or she demands to see past means obtaining impressive grades but sapping aw ay exams or be given sample questions, as though this is the personality that could be most useful when an actu some kind of student right, when in fact it is only due to al professional. ■

etter grades of A and B typically correspond, respectively, to eval uations of excellent" and "good," while C is considered mediocre or borderline. Such distinctions are all the more impor tant in professional disciplines such as medicine and engineering, where students, following graduation, often end up working in safety critical areas. If given the choice between flying on an aircraft where the flight control electronics were designed by an A student versus a C student, the response for most would be obvious. It is normally the prerogative and responsibility of the instructor to evaluate the learning of students by assigning such letter grades. To maintain academic integrity, these should be assigned fairly and con sistently. However, last year, following the complaints of two students who received C + grades in my 500-level class on artificial intelli gence, the dean of Engineering abandoned such principles and inflat ed each of these marks to a B. The rationale for doing so was that according to the undergraduate calendar, "In Engineering, letter grades are assigned according to the grading scheme adopted by the professor in charge of a particular course," though no sucfi policy is articulated in the graduate calendar. This would be quite sensible were it not for the fact that most pro fessors in Electrical and Computer Engineering do likewise, yet their grading decisions have not been overruled. A survey of grading prac-

To m ain tain ac ad em ic integrity, it is n o rm ally the p rero g ativ e a n d responsibility o f the instructor to evalu ate the learn in g o f students by assigning such letter grades.

tices found that only a relatively small percentage of 500-level cours es actually follow the graduate studies guidelines— 37.5 per cent of courses used a threshold that was within one percentage point of the suggested 6 5 for a B— and of the courses that do not follow these guidelines, none of the professors informed their classes of the numeric-to-letter grade scale used. Moreover, the grade inflation from C + to B fails to consider whether or not the students' performance actually warranted the higher marks. If the graduate studies' formula was spec ified as the rule at the start of term, the difficulty of assignments and final examination would have been increased, and the resulting letter grades would likely have ended up the same. For the graduate students in question, the difference between a C+ and a B is significant. The latter is a pass while the former requires that they retake the course. W hile this certainly explains why these stu dents might complain, raising their grades is not the solution... it is sim ply unfair. In the interests of academic integrity, the faculty must apply its policies consistently, not just to a few students, nor to all the students in one class, but to all the 500-level classes in Engineering. ■ Further details concerning this matter are a va ila b le at www.cim .m cgill.ca/~jer/courses/grading.htm l. Jeremy Cooperstock is an associate professor o f Electrical and Computer Engineering.

All d re ss e d u p a n d n o w h e re to p e e L IZ A L L E M A N G n residence, on campus, at bars, and at restaurants the city over, any time a girl or guy—but let's be realistic, since most boys can hold it— has got to go, they face innumerable strug gles. It doesn't take much for me to compromise my short-lived "no booty in public toities" policy. After all, the pea-sized blad der that heredity w ill refuse to take responsibility for requires many an opportunity to peruse ladies' rooms. Beyond the occasional w adding up of toilet paper, an over arching sense of vanity, resulting in the frequent need to reapply

B asic h u m a n n e e d s r e q u ir e th e m o st " s tr a ig h t f o r w a r d " a m e n itie s — c e le b s w o n 't d o c o c a in e o r th r o w u p $ 4 0 0 w o r th o f ro a s te d p h e a s a n t in just a n y to ile t, y o u k n o w .

lip gloss and adjust the amplitude of cleavage, also requires mir ror spacé. And of course, there is the added charm and privacy of a dimly lit squatting space that screams "Romance" to lovers who choose to cozy up stall-style. The water closet can also be useful every now and again as self-imposed solitary confinement. In short, the advantages of an immaculate bathroom are impres sive to a gal about town.

Even after resigning oneself to the benefits of stall hopping, the dank, dark, and depressing reality of the situation is enough to amend one's public piddling policy. Think ciggy butts in the sink, used sanitary napkins that are anything but adorning the floor, and that someone one stall over taking pride in relieving herself in the noisiest manner possible. Yet politesse and bathroom etiquette, though evasive, are not what make me peevish to the point of writing my grievances. Alas, it is the sad state of public washrooms today. Toilets on campus, in particular, are hardly thrones fit for kings and queens. Perhaps it has to do with a lack of mainte nance funds or an intentional effort on M cG ill's part to discour age doddling, recreational drug use, and toilet-side canoodling. Regardless, there are few places to do your business that can't be described as undesirable. Be it in the basement of Leacock or on the main floor o f Shatner, there is nary a facility without a ueue 10 deep, that isn't missing the majority of the locks, or ripping a mystery substance (please don't let that be toilet water) from the ceiling. And while I am hardly a self-conscious lass, there are times when it would be swell if my unmentionables remained private domain, something which proves to be impos sible when people keep walking in on me. Off-campus, the situation rarely improves. As if knocking back all that tequila hasn't made you queasy enough, you see things in bar bathrooms worthy of a Stephen King novel; even at

places where the martinis cost as much as tuition, and the designer-clad undergrads mingle with businessmen promising to buy them steaks. Despite the money, the porcelain seats are nasty as sin. I don't understand the business aspect.of it. W hen I go out, if the facilities are gross, I will drink less, which effectively elimi nates time spent in the bathroom. If I hit up Bifteck they want me to spend cash so that they'll be able to cover expenditure and turn a profit, right? But if I don't want to pee there, I'm not going to buy a beer, let alone seven. W hen you stop and think about it, having disgusting toilets is actually quite bad for the economy. Business owners should take inspiration not from the rat-infested alley across the way, but rather, economist John Keynes's Multiplier concept, which entails that increasing expenditure can augment national income. It's so basic, St-Laurent: you give a lit tle, you get a little. M ayb e witnessing the crème de la croppers has spoiled me, from the automatic everything at Dallas-Fort W orth airport, to the W indsor Arms Hotel in Toronto, complete with a velvet chaise longue, to the luxe lavatories of über-hip fusion eateries in N e w York—celebs won't do cocaine or throw up $ 4 0 0 worth of roasted pheasant in just any toilet, you know. But I don't expect that. Basic human needs require the most straightforward amenities. Honestly, I'd be happy with a just a lock and some two-ply. O f course, a velvet chaise longue couldn't hurt. ■

the m cgill tribune | 2.3.05 | opinion

M c G ill T rib u n e Curiosity delivers. Editor- in -C hief

Natalie Fletcher editor@tribune.mcgill.ca M anaging Editor

James Scarfone seniored@tribune.mcgill.ca N ews Editors

Jennifer Jett Laura Saba Lisa Varano tribnews@tribune.mcgill.ca Features Editors

Liz Allemang Panthea Lee features@tribune.mcgill.ca A&E Editors

Daniel Chodos Lise Treutler arts@tribune.mcgill.ca

Th e principal's c h a rm offensive JEFF ROBERTS

jeff.roberts@ elf.m cgill.ca kinder, gentler M cG ill? Veterans of this place w ill likely snort with skepticism, and harrumph that they will believe it when see it. Yet, this seems to be what the principal envisions with “ making the best years better, a new task force that seeks to effect a rapproche ment of sorts between students and the adminis tration. H ow this w ill play out is anyone's guess. O n the face of it, the principal's initiative is not a bad idea. For as long as anyone can remember, this school has been characterized by an institutional culture that is dysfunctional, and even hostile, towards its own community. M any students arriving from other universities are aghast to discover that simple procedures like obtaining a student card or changing programs can quick ly take on the dimensions of a Kafka novel. M ore seasoned students simply become resigned to the school's bureaucratic intransigence, and treat it as unchangeable as the Montreal winter. To be fair to the administration, much of the problem can be laid at the feet of successive provincial governments, which have found it politically expedient to strangle M cG ill financial-

ly. The result has been that many administrative units at M cG ill are overworked and understaffed, and simply lack the time or resources to deliver a higher level of service. This, in turn, has pro duced a sort of siege mentality on the part of decision-makers that is often reflected in the uni versity's interactions with its students. To reform this state of affairs will reauire more than just a communications offensive. If the principal is serious about changing M cG ill's insti tutional culture, she will have to take care that her initiative does not come to be regarded as a series of mean-nothing platitudes. If the cam paign misfires, it will only increase the sense of disconnect and alienation felt by many students. It is also imperative to recognize that M cG ill students don't need to be mollycoddled. As noted by a recent American survey, "overachievers and independent types” are the ones w ho flourish on this campus. This is as it should be. Students seek ing a more gushy university experience can always pursue encounter sessions at UVic or bas ket weaving at Nipissing. W h a t students here do need from the

administration is genuine recognition and respect for the places and people that matter to them. The ancillary services department, for example, has been particularly cavalier in disregarding day-to-day student concerns such as eating spaces, coursepacks, and copy facilities. This must stop. Likewise, the administration must overcome its antipathy of the student press. M cG ill is fortu nate to have several good newspapers, and those in power must cease to regard them as a public relations liability to be coerced or discred ited. Those w ho believe that M cG ill must stay on message.forget that the school's mandate is not a corporate one, but a moral one. Dissent and crit icism are an inherent part of a university's mis sion, and the campus papers— regardless of their shortcomings— represent a crucial means of fur thering this mission. The w a y in which students and the adminis tration perceive one another is hardly going to change overnight. W hether change occurs at all will depend on whether the principal can trans form slogan into substance. ■

Swift kick

Th e outright fascism of

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Chad Ronalds

ne of the fundamental tenets of a liberal democracy is equal access to education. W e, the citizens of these pluralistic soci eties, pride ourselves on the openness and inclusive ness of our universities. W e value the policies of multiculturalism and affirmative action that ensure that our universities are and will continue to be places of diversity and tolerance. But let me tell you that there is one group that continues to taste the cold bitter steel of closed doors. Yes, people, this group of very special people is cast out of the ivory tower to be spat upon and chased from the waking hours figuratively—and occasional ly literally—by crazed torch-bearing mobs. Yes, peo ple, I am talking about our brothers and sisters who are sadly afflicted with Vampirism, and it is a crime and a shame that they continue to be denied the pleasures of a university education. Simply put, vampires cannot go to university or, at the very least, graduate from one. Any university worth its reputation insists that students take a fair smattering of daytime classes. As vampires turn to salt when exposed to the sun's harsh rays—an unfor tunate allergy to gamma radiation—they are uninten tionally discriminated against in the modern upper tier education system. Thus, a vampire teen may

dream of becoming a doctor or a teacher or a lawyer, but those careers will forever remain the inac cessible bittersweet tear-soaked play of his subcon scious. Even older vampires are precluded from valu able skills-retraining. Please tell me how a vampire, bitten during the 1870 Paris Commune, is supposed to adapt to a 21 st-century knowledge-based econo my? Frilly shirts aside, if they can't attend trade school they are barred from all computer-based industries. As humankind continues to evolve beyond the sooty, smelly world of the Industrial Revolution, they are literally left behind in the dust. N ow the only venues for educational advance ment left open to vampires are second-rate William Shatner-endorsed correspondence courses or some dank, inner-city, adult high schools. But forget about governmental financial assistance if your chosen vocation is "gothic blood-sucker with a penchant for crypts." This tends not to fly well with student-assis tance bureaucrats who know how to sniff out a degenerate when they see one. Vampires, left with out the means for financial support, generally abstain from such courses and continue to fall behind in the knowledge race. Still, this is nothing compared to the torment that

vampire youths experience once they actually man age to enter a university or college. Night in night out, they hear nothing but insults and jibes. "Oh look who's here, Mr. I'm-too-cool-for-sunshine," or "Oh, wow that petticoat is so fin de siècle... and covered in blood. That is such a tacky faux pas." As vampires tend to be homeschooled, they often lack the neces sary social graces to respond civilly to such provoca tion. N ow I ask you, why should we expect from a vampire anything but his wrath, confusion, and jeal ousy? Trapped in dead-end jobs, pursued by the police and Blade "The Daywalker," cursed and spat upon as "undead filth," it is no surprise that vampires turn to violence. It has long been supposed that blood-sucking is sexual, but it is in fact class-based. It is the response of a trapped individual who feels a loss of entitlement at the economic opportunities granted to others. The frilly silk shirts, exquisitely tai lored cape and the whole Victorian super-pimp look is the product of an individual dangerously overcom pensating for his menial status. In sum, this is a hum ble plea for tolerance of the undead in education policy because, as we judge them as plasma-crazed devourers of the living, aren't we also judging our selves? ■

C ollaborators

Dave Barber, Susan Cooke, Jeremy Cooperstock, Christine Cullen, Vladimir Eremin, Tony Esteves, Jesse Gutman, Emily Harris, Michael Ichioka, Cristina Markham, Dan M cQ uillan, Jeremy Morris, David Nataf, Danny Nguyen, Caroline Olechowski, Sid Pharasi, Resham Popat, Julia Raponi, Jeff Roberts, M a x Shapiro, Elisha Siegel, Steve W aldm an, Josh Wilner, and very bitter, jaded, unimpressed, selfless, and oh-so-modest (errr, anal) secret agents. Shhh. T ribune O ffices

Editorial. Shatner University Centre, Suite 110, 3480 McTavish, Montreal QC Tel: 514.398.6789 Fax. 514.398.1750 Advertising. Brown Student Building, Suite 1200, 3600 McTavish, Montreal QC H3A 1Y2 Tel 514 398 6806 Fax. 514.398.7490

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■8

Queen's, actually David Blye notes that the CIS moved Q ueen’s out of the O ntarioQ uebec Intercollegiate Football Conference (The G old vs. the Red— 15.2.05). Actually, it was Queen's that divorced itself from the O Q IF C despite numerous attempts by M cG ill and others to have it reconsider its decision. Queen's was followed by Ottawa, and as such was born the Q uebec Intercollegiate Football Conference, which for two years was a four-team conference. W e toiled for one year as a four-team conference looking for acceptance from Ontario, which also fell on deaf ears. W e then moved east and found a willing partner in the AUAA. Both conferences at the time needed varied competition, and so was born the AUAAQIFC Interlock. Shortly thereafter,

Université de Montréal joined the QIFC and soon after, Sherbrooke. Looking back, the Queen's and Ottawa departure was the driving force in strengthening today's QIFC. Yes, there are many that would like to see Queen's play M cG ill in football, but the leadership has to come from M cG ill to come up with a creative scheduling alternative that would benefit all concerned, such as an A U A A /Q IF C Q U A interlock weekend on a twoyear homeand-home rotation. This would only happen if there is enough sup port in Ontario. In the meantime, McGill w ill have to play Laval, Montréal, Sherbrooke, Concordia, and Bishop's, while looking for ways to elevate its game within the present alignment. — H arry Zarins, O Q I F C and Q IF C Commissioner 1997-2002

Heavenly lovin' to an extent I love the birth control pill just as much as the next guy or girl but I think it might be causing more harm than it's worth. In the good old days, condoms were used to prevent pregnancy while at the same time reducing the risk of catch ing an STD. Have students at this universi ty forgotten that 5 ,0 0 0 new Canadians contract HIV every year? The birth control pill is a heavenly invention, but because it removes the immediate fear of pregnancy, condoms may be getting left out. I think people in our age group need to wise up and start bagging it. Remember people, HIV doesn't discriminate. —Jamie Ferguson-Woods U2 Political Science Email your (very) random thoughts to oped@tribune.mcgill.ca

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10 opinion j 2.3.05 | th e m cgill tribune N e u ro tic a

U gly p e o p le ta k e th e train cristina. markham@ mail. mcgill. ca

CRISTINA MARKHAM ary Grant has ruined my life. After seeing North b y Northwest, I came to the obvious conclusion that only attractive, dapper, and well-spoken individuals travel by train. I became convinced that if I ever travel on a sleeper train, my life would be turned upside down by a handsome man in a three-piece suit with a questionable past. Men in the diner car would all don fedoras, always lighting two cigarettes at a time before offering one to the lady sitting opposite them. Imagine my delight when the chance to test my theory came up. I'd been invited to Halifax for Reading W eek, and my crip pling fear of heights and lack of drivers licence left me one option: the train. I booked my cabin and began daydreaming of the debonair and mysterious men I'd meet on my journey. M y fantasy crumbled before I even boarded. I scanned the cro w d —aside from two snarly-looking girls, I was the youngest by at least 15 years. W hile there were easily 5 0 men in line, there was not a single fedora in sight. Instead, I found myself surround ed by beer bellies and moustaches. It dawned on me that, since

this trip was more expensive by train than by plane, these people probably shared my aviatophobia. It was doubtful that I was going to find an eloquent and shadowy man to light my cigarettes amid this bunch of Luddites. M y first observation about my deluxe cabin, aside from Via's egregious misuse of the word "deluxe," was that it smelled like pee. Before I could question the source, the attendant came in to show me how to "use" my room. M y tiny coffin-sized room had a toilet, a sink, a seat, and a bed—all carefully hidden in the wall like some 1960s bachelor pad. By 1Opm, I had defeated all my previous Minesweeper records, stolen all the free chips from the empty cabins, and attempted, unsuccessfully, to Feng Shui my cabin. Bored stupid, I ventured to the back of the train to visit the "observation car." The scowling girls, apparently as bored as I was, had gotten there before me and befriended several of the moustachio-d men. I turned around to return to my state of hermitage when one of the girls offered me a beer.

An hour later, my new best friends had told me all about their impromptu trip to Moncton. They had no family, friends, or logical reason for going to M oncton— let alone by train—but they felt like going and nothing was going to stop them. Moustache #1 was in a heated debate with Bad Toupée about US politics, and Bifocals was telling Moustache # 2 and anyone else who would listen about the creepily Freudian play he wrote about his mother Around 2am, I swaggered back to my cabin and de-scrunched my bed. I don t know how I survived the night, as I apparently didn't properly de-scrunch and was almost eaten by it three times. Nine hours and half a province later, I woke up to an announcement that our train would be two hours late. I cursed Via for being so consistently behind schedule, the scowlers for getting me so drunk on their powerful East Coast beer, and myself for being too ridiculous to get on a plane. I swore to myself that I would get over this stupid fear and never, ever suffer the inhuman ity that is the sleeper train again. Except, o f course, for my trip home. ■

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The com p etitive , c u tth ro a t a n d a th le tic side o f chess C A R O L IN E O L E C H O W S K I here aren't many sports that require no field or arena, no special equipment or uniforms. N or are there many sports that can boast a history that spans more than a millennium. Like many other com petitive games, chess has rules, referees, coaches, and time limits. W hile the dialogue of "what qualifies a sport?" roars on, similarities between typical athlet ics and the intellectually affiliated hobby have pushed a group of chess enthusiasts to fight for the game to be considered a sport for the 2 0 0 8 Beijing Olympics. M cG ill Chess Club president Andrei Moskvitch, U4 Mechanical Engineering, would probably echo

this desire. "A chess competition is the same thing as any other sports competition, except that [players] exercise their mental strength and endurance more than their physical," he says. "O f course, if the game is six hours long and there are two games a day, a chess play er's body has to be very fit to survive the constant men Behold the chess player's dumbbell: the pawn. tal concentration and the stress," he adds. "Often the best chess players are semi-professional athletes in tra skills sharp. The successful player needs to stay in good mental, physical, and psychological shape, ditional sports." W e can debate whether or not chess is in fact a and it doesn't hurt to develop your creativity. sport, but the M cG ill Chess Club still takes on its share "Chess is not only a 'mental sport,' it is also an of intense competition. The club currently boasts art," says Moskvitch. "W hen you play a game, you between 6 0 and 7 0 members, of all skill levels, who create a work of art or science, which can be under participate regularly in tournaments, exhibition stood and admired by someone else. It is the player's games, lessons, and chess shows. This year, the club imagination that brings to life the dead pieces on a has travelled as far as Toronto, where they ranked fifth square universe." overall in the Canadian Inter-University Chess Despite these similarities, the Chess Club still . Championship. The inter-university chess scene has its doesn't receive the same benefits as your average own checklist of "teams to beat," including past "Cansports team. Moskvitch complains that SSMU gave Champs" U Q ÀM and Waterloo. W hile the M cG ill the club only 15 per cent of their requested budget, Chess Club's moves are impressive, the team's reputa ' which meant that the team had to fundraise in order tion, representative of M cG ill and Montreal, is just as to go to the Canadian Championship. Unfortunately, likely to instill fear in the heart of any competitor. they didn't make enough to travel to the Pan-American "Everyone knows about us, since we're the loudest, Games. Until chess is recognized on par with other most fun, and strongest team to play against," says competitive sports, it seems as though problems such as this lack of funds will continue to plague chess Moskvitch proudly. The parallels between chess and competitive clubs everywhere. Getting recognized in Beijing sports are striking: Moskvitch explains that chess play2 0 0 8 would be a good start. ■ The M c G ill Chess Club meets every W ednesday ers need to practice four times a week in order to from 5-7pm in Burnside 1024. Email andreim@free.fr become skilled—many members like to play on a daily basis in the basement of Burnside to keep their for more information.

What's the worst part of being a prof? Hiding from students that try to squeeze out an extra point from me to get an À+ instead of an A. What's your favourite book? Among a couple, "L'écume des jours" by Boris Vian comes to my mind, a testimony to the creativ ity of our brains, the most astounding aspect of life. W hat's your favourite type of motor bike? Those that have an addictive intake roar and are not really intended for street use. Do you prefer Toronto or Montreal? Montreal, without a doubt. Do you have any particular organism names that you like to pronounce? I like to say "Brassicaceae" with an American accent. What's your most memorable lab expe rience? A light-exposed bottle of hydrogen peroxide solution exploding in my back... Do you like coconut? Sure. I like the song "Coconut Woman" by Harry Belafonte even more! If you weren't in biology, what would you do? Big time construction engineering.

Christian Hardtke is an assistant profes sor in the b iology department. He is spending this semester teaching and researching at University o f Lausanne in Switzerland. Specializing in plant b io lo g y Prof. Hardtke received his M S c and PhD from University of M unich— doing postdoc work with Yale and University o f Toronto— before arriving at M cG ill. W hat made you want to w ork in plant biology? I was fascinated by the prospect of genetic engineering after watching "The Blade Runner" in 1984, and studied biology as a result. During my undergraduate studies I avoided plant biology, mainly by fault of the sleepy botany department of the University of Munich. I stumbled into plant genetics when looking for a Master's thesis project, after being attracted by a poster offering a project in embryogenesis of Arabidopsis, illustrated by a funny picture of a mutant embryo. At the time, I had no idea that Arabidopsis was a plant. But I was caught and never regretted it. What's the best part of being a prof? All that is covered by a quote from nobel prize winner Sydney Brenner: "Science is a life style!"

— Com piled b y Geraldine Anania

STREETER

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the vainest o f them all? Is it important to you that your friends are hot? "N o. I used to think it was important that I had hot female friends, until I real ized that most girls won't date their male friends. N o w I just stick to people w ho are good company." — M ike Farber, U 2 Psychology

How much time do you spend getting ready for school? "Three minutes. I wake up, put on clothes and, if there's time, I brush my teeth." — A ndrew Chan, U3 History

W hat's your biggest pet peeve with other people's looks? "There are so many fixable appear ance flaws that the majority of the popula tion overlooks. Unibrows, obvious lip liner, and pit stains are all gross. Does bad breath count?" -J e n Fiorella, U1 Chemistry

Do you think people judge you based on the way you look? "I think / judge myself based on the w ay I look.” -M a rie -F ra n c e Tremblay, U ] Political Science — Com piled b y Liz Allem ang

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F a cin g o u r fa c e s W e m ig h t as well understand them , as those aro u n d us a lre a d y think th e y d o BY LISETREUTLER

or too long, beauty has been defined by narrow, stifling stereotypes. You've told us it's time to change all that. W e agree." These opening words of Dove's "Campaign for Real Beauty" mission statement do not express a novel sen timent, but they do speak the truth. From the moment we wake up to shower aw ay our smudged eyeliner and bar stink from the previous night's excursions, we are judged by our appear ances. W hen we go for job interviews, we're told time and time again to dress appropriately, smile, and remember that our body language counts just as much as our words. W hether w e're assess ing our own value in the looks chain of survival or being continu ously deconstructed by inner posses and strangers alike, the clichés ring true. Never has the proverbial book's cover been so scrutinized as in the last few decades, when digital photography, the Internet, and the surplus of advertising have increasingly emphasized the importance of the image. You, likely, have been a player in the Image W orld since elementary school, with your judgments evolv ing from "four-eyes" to "stoner-grunge cum pseudo-punk kid." Our subcultures have their stereotypical dress: if you were told to pick the A student, would you pick the girl in pinstripe pants and a blouse, or the girl with dreadlocks and a tattered, floral-print dress? N o matter how often we're told "it's what's on the inside that counts," the outside determines whether w e will even bother taking a peek.

Been there, seen that W e hear it from parents, friends, professors, and co-workers. It's taught in a plethora of sociology and womens studies courses. O ur therapists long to drill the message into our brains: the mass media are exerting more of an influence every day, and we con tinue to be affected by the trend, especially with regards to our self esteem. Did you need to be told that right now? Probably not, as the debate over the harmfulness of certain ad campaigns is cited

endlessly, especially among academic communities, and you have more than likely glanced at one of the many style ads in the past 2 4 hours, whether while taking a Vogue break or rolling your eyes at still more "Expand Your Penis Size!" spam. But no matter how many times w e are told to ignore the media influences surrounding us, the numbers prove we haven't got the message. As part of the above-mentioned "Campaign for Real Beauty," in September 2 0 0 4 , Dove commissioned an indepth survey of 3 ,2 0 0 women across the globe and found disturb ing statistics. "By an overwhelming majority, women around the world are most comfortable using the words normal or average to describe their looks," the survey maintains. "O nly two per cent of women around the world choose the world beautiful." Worse still is that 88 per cent of women listed "being loved" as the most important fac tor in making themselves feel beautiful. Evidently, women still need approval from others to hold themselves in good esteem. As for men, their image concerns are often categorized under the umbrella term of "masculinity." In the February 2 0 0 4 issue of the Journal o f Social and Clinical Psychology, researcher and pro fessor Stacey Tantleff-Dunn expressed her opinions on how the media affect men. "The level of muscularity and attractiveness that are idealized in the media often are not attainable for the average man," she explains. "Men see more of a discrepancy between how they want to look, or think they need to look, and the image they see in the mirror." Backing up her claim is a 1 9 9 7 Garner-commis-sioned study comparing men's and women's physical worries. Though body concerns for both genders have been rising steadily over the decades, as early as 1 9 9 7 men's insecurities about their chests had already outweighed women's. Coincidentally, the prevalence of topless men in commercials for deodorant, cologne, and the like has also been on the rise. Yes, w e are a society con sumed by unattainable media-image goals, which in turn imbed

sky-high standards into our judgment systems. But we do not need to be told this. W omen know that when they flip to, for example, Cosmopolitan's monthly "G uy W ithout His Shirt" and log on to the magazine's W eb site to rate the smiling lad, they are judging based on a five-section ogle of an airbrushed photograph. Men know that porn films—even of the Paris Hilton genre—are completely staged, and that the men and women are actors w ho go through makeup and many takes in order to get that darn money shot right. Yes, w e know all this, so why do we con tinue to criticize? W omen are ubiquitously attacked as the superficial sex, yet scathing remarks about bad hair days, saggy breasts, and cellulite can be matched any day by a man bemoaning his penis size, beer gut, and height. W e are all guilty of self-hatred and dis creet—or not so discreet—insulting of others. If you're going to laugh at a prospective boob job client, then you'd better level that playing field and giggle over the "small fries" who rush to compen sate with big cars. Can we as a society move past this circular argument about the media? W e can only hope, for if not, we're in for many more sociological lectures on the damage those airbrushed, tanned bod ies are doing to us. Realize, for example, that the oft-bashed beau ty and fashion magazines don't claim to be anything but—Cosmo, Glamour, and the like are marketed as what they are. The same goes for the famed Playboy and Hustler subscriptions men so care fully hide: yes, if you purchase a porn magazine, you are going to see picture after picture of perfect-looking young women who you can t have. Sorry, but take the issue—no pun intended—real istically. If you enjoy reading about new clothes, flip through the pages. But if those magazines make you sick to your stomach, sim ply don't buy them. It's as simple as that.

Oh coed, how do I judge thee? O ur campus provides the perfect opportunity to log measures

th e m cgill tribune | 2.3.05 | feature ] 5

If s not you, if s m e Like m eets like—a n d likes

p f No m atter how fly you are, some hotties just can't be hooked

Further evidence that we really just want to d ate ourselves f opposites really do attract, how come you run into so many couples that look like each other? Look closely at Sting and his wife, Trudie Styler, or Jude Law and his fiancée Sienna M iller Are you getting the heebie jeebies? Yes, i* is rather disturbing that your brothers girlfriend looks more like him than you do, and w e were all a little relieved when Brad Pitt and Gwyneth Paltrow called off their creepy we-could-have-been-twins engagement. But is there an underlying reason why pretty dates pretty and ugly marries ugly? Researchers at the University of St. Andrews in Scotland found that volunteers, when shown a group of images, said they were attracted to faces that most closely resembled their own. The subjects gravitated most toward modified images of their own faces. The researchers con cluded that people are most attracted to other people that resemble their parents, subconsciously reasoning that if your parents were able to have children, someone that looks like them w ill be able to as well. This conclusion is supported by the age-old idea that girls choose boys w ho remind them of Daddy Dearest. According to a University of Pécs study published in the N e w Scientist, women tend to marry men who look like their fathers. The process of choosing mates based on your parents' attributes is called sexual imprinting, and is seen in humans and animals alike. W hile w e d o see unattractive people walking the streets on the arms of gorgeous partners, In Paths to M arriage (Sage, 1986) Bernard L Murstein details his research during which he found that peo ple tend to choose significant others with the same level of attractive ness as themselves. After ending his engagement with Paltrow, Pitt married Jennifer Aniston, w ho may not look as much like him but is arguably as attrac-

tive. Even if you don't end up with a partner w ho could have been born into your family, you might eventually wake up next to your mirror image. Couples that have been together for extended periods of time begin to resemble each other as well. After spending a significant amount of time with a particular person, a partner will start to mimic their speech, gestures and facial expressions, leading the couple to appear to look alike. This disquieting trend may creep us out, but sooner or later, lookalike coupledom w ill hunt us all down. ■ — Laura Saba

finding each other and identifying themselves with a com ou throw yourself at someone and they pass. "Is it mon label." Westphal adds that becoming a part of soci because they don't find me attractive?" you question ety allows for asexuals to accept their orientation, making in self doubt. "There, there," your friend soothes, them comfortable enough in some cases to "come out" to "He's probably just gay." And so it continues. The perpet their friends and family. ual cycle of validating your self-worth—and stroking your In past months, asexuality has been highly publi friends' fragile egos—by snuggling up to suspicions of oth cized, and not simply because sexually rejected people ers' sexuality. But now, after years of being on the moral everywhere are finding it to be a handy excuse. Once blacklist and feeling guilty for attributing physical rejection only depicted as the sexual language of worms and inac to your dates sexual orientation, it has become clear that curately associated with celibacy and moral depravity, it may not be your sixth toe or glass eye that sends a date recent studies on asexuality prove that it is a common sex packing. It is entirely possible that your would-be lover is ual orientation, like homo- or bisexuality. In the 1980s, sci just not interested in tapping it with you—or anybody. entists found that 12 per cent of male rats and gerbils Asexuality Visibility and Education N etw ork were uninterested in the female population, though it is [www.asexuality.org], an online forum which creates a unclear as to whether they were asexual or simply interest much-needed dialogue for the asexual community and ed in males. Teams affiliated with the U.S. Sheep educates those who know little about the orientation, quite Experiment Station, Oregon State University and Oregon sparsely describes asexuals as people who do not experi Health and Science University presented their own find ence sexual attraction. AVEN founder and asexuality ings in the early 1990s, concluding that two ta three per advocate David Jay insists, however, that the various lev cent of rams studied were asexual. In August 2 0 0 4 , The els of asexuality indicate that it is possible for asexuals to Journal o f Sex Research published the results of a study by swoon over another's assets. “ Some asexual people find Anthony Bogaert, psychologist and human-sexuality expert themselves strongly attracted to others. They will experi at Brock University. Bogaert's research provides tentative ence a desire to become intimate with the people that they are attracted to, but no desire to express that intimacy sex figures for the amount of asexual people in the population, which he represents at one per cent, close to the amount ually,'' insists Jay. "Asexual people w ho experience of homosexual individuals, which stands at about three attraction will often identify themselves as gay, bi, or per cent. straight as well as asexual." As the asexual population continues to grow, estab Though asexuality is still a completely foreign con lishing themselves as a legitimate sexual orientation, it cept to most, a recent upsurge in media coverage, corre becomes more plausible that your getting turned down has lating to a small but strong “A" pride movement, has thrust less to do with you and more to do with them. W hile this asexuality into the spotlight. Author Sylvia Pagan attitude— "I'm perfect and any rejection stems from lack of Westphal, who's article on asexuality in N e w Scientist sexual interest, period" —is likely one that your therapist M a ga zin e (October 20 0 4 ) shed insight on the lifestyle, would advise against. It is, however, not altogether suggests that asexuals are finally finding their place in unfounded, and for those of us used to heavysociety. "Until recently these people felt ... petting our self-doubts, it may provide isolated, never suspecting oth ****** », some comfort. ■ ers felt the W estphal. "But — Liz Allemang now, they are

of appearance. W e, the student body, appear to enjoy filling our between-class time with debates about dating adventures, self-improve ment, and the odd, unconcealed insult. Case in point: the following sample of unaltered—and anonymous—quotations, both overheard from strangers and among friends. Appearance-related judgments abound. Though some prefer the traditional— "Oh my G od, she should not be wearing those pants!"—others work harder, often resulting in the indecipherable insult: "You look like a demented, crotchety oak tree come to life." Instead of scratching our heads, some of us turn to dry humour to brush off our faux-pas. Has someone commented on your resemblance to a troll recently? Throw back unaffected sarcasm. Oh, great. I am so glad I remind you of a Treasure Troll. Just don t forget to let your tummy-jewel shine in all its glory. But has our superficiality gone too far? Are w e sick of the physical image and thus turning to different—yet equally ridiculous and shal lo w -w a y s to bully? „ "He's really nice and all, but I still find it so hard to tarR to him, says the girl at the Shatner ATM. Her male companion offers up his logic: "M aybe it's because his name is Chester.' Apparently, this poor Chester has nothing wrong with him other than an unfortunate name. There is no "solution" to the image-crazed culture w e live in. It has evolved over time, in conjunction with daily life becoming busier and thus resulting in less time for discussion. "Instantaneous" is the constant key word. The important action is to understand and recognize when judgments are being made simply on appearance, whether you yourself are making them, or you feel it's being done to you. Its clear that w e re sick of the mixed messages from the m edia—to listen or not to listen? so it's time w e turned to ourselves. Unless you re a rising model on a gosee, your appearance is not the complete story. And even then, remem ber... Photoshop. ■ The full report on the Dove-commissioned study on women's feelings about beauty can be found at ww w.cam paignforrealbeauty.com /uploadedf i les/dove_wh ite_paper_fi nal. pdf

-m m

^ Jligh tlife F ig h tin g fo r th e ir rights to p a rty Young entrepreneurs take over Montreal nightlife RESHAM POPAT amous—or infamous, if you're so inclined—for its host of wild personalities frequenting amazing clubs, the city of Montreal has one of the best nightlife scenes in North America. Underneath the glitz and booming speakers, a new trend has been quietly developing: as our favourite clubs get older and better, their owners seèm to be getting younger—and cuterl All over the island, more and more nightclubs are owned and run by a younger gen e ra tion -m ost under the age of 3 0 —w ho seem to know exactly what they are doing. In other cities, the nightlife is generally controlled by middleaged men who have been in the game of making people dance for years. So who are these "kids" running our clubs and how do they succeed in this industry? A prime example is Pavan M agon, a club w hiz who is taking over our evenings one club at a time. Currently 26, M agon, a cur rent M cG ill student and Concordia graduate, has been in the game since the age of 14, well-known by his very appropriate nickname, Paw-T. By promoting at different clubs around the city, M agon acquired a taste for the nightlife very early on. After throve ing many a party in clubs like Del Ray and Groove Society, includ ing McGill-affiliated events at Element and Gert's, he decided it was time to open his own club with fellow promoter and bartender Troy Lournesse. That was where their shared success story truly began.

During Magon's last semester at school in December 2 0 0 2 , the pair opened up Club Blu (1 4 2 6 rue Stanley), and asked W ill Hum, another friend who had just sold his shares at Tokyo club, to join them. Following the success of this funky nightclub, the trio opened Boodha Bar (1401 rue MacKay) and M ojito (1 2 2 2 rue Bishop), which they later sold, only twelve months later. So, what is the secret of their success? "Diversity," emphasizes M agon. By owning three different clubs, they were able to broad en their clientele, a key factor in this city. M ojito, a Latin club, has a very different crowd than the other two, while Blu has been the

HANDS

OFF

THE

location of choice for many M c G ill and Concordia parties, as well as charity parties, fashion shows, and fundraisers. The club has also hosted many in te rn a tio n a lly renowned deejays and emcees, like Quest Love of the Roots and Jin o f the Ruff Ryders. M ag on also explains how he and his team prefer to staff stu dents, which keeps the club young, and gives the students a chance to get their foot in the door. In contrast, Boodha Bar was opened for an older, more mature crowd. W ith an oval shape and big Buddhas on the windows, the lounge has been host to guests such as Deepak Chopra, Alec Baldwin, and, most recently, Eddie Murphy. M agon, Lournesse, and Hum are not the only young club owners in the city. Jet Club ( 1 0 0 3 rue SteCatherine E.) and Club Extreme (2 0 2 0 rue Crescent) are owned by W ally Patel, and both clubs are tremendously sue-

cessful. Along the M ain, Jon Jay, Vik Fehgal, and Vijay Patel acquired O rchid (3 5 5 6 boul. St-Laurent) at the end of 2 0 0 1 , and since then the club has been consistently packed. Yasser W aly, Randy G oonada, and Amit Chopra recently sold Mint Soundbar ( 1215 boul. de Maisonneuve O.), but "loved every minute' of their time on the throne. The common thread? All of these clubs have a diverse range of party-goers, many of university students. W h a t keeps these M clubs going strong, and how do these young own ers know how to manage successful venues while other cities rely on the balding —but seasoned — demographic? The answer: some experience, and a lot of guts. After all, who better to run the clubs than those who love to party? "You have to have a vision" says M agon He explains that it is one thing to bring in a crowd, but completely another to keep them coming back. His strategy is to change every thing about the club around once in a while "You don't have to always open up a new club," he says. "Just change what you already have. It's not about new capital investment, but using the tools you already have." So what does the future hold for M agon, Lournesse, and Hum? Soon, they are going to close Club Blu for renovations, including the addition of a new upstairs floor, which will serve as a lounge for live bands. Boodha Bar will now be open as a shisha/internet café by day and the usual nightclub/lounge by night. In Magon's opin ion, the sky's the limit when it comes to nightlife, and many more young entrepreneurs around Montreal are realizing just that. ■

CANVAS

R e q u ie m for a G o n z o JULIA RAPONI

ith the death of writer Hunter S. Thompson, the world lost one of its truest mavericks. Most will remember him as the man behind Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, but there is far more to his legacy than immortalization by Johnny Depp. As the obituaries roll in, one has to wonder about the state of journalism—and the arts—today.

Most of what he dared to write wouldn't be fit to print in today's mainstream media.

Thompson is credited as being the founder o f "gonzo journalism," a style that was part reporting, part fiction, and part experience. His days as a drug-fuelled, excessloving reporter earned him a reputation for an unblinking prose that described the day to day habits of the average

Joe humping the American dream. Thompson didn't need to seek out his stories; the stories sought him out instead, and he was more than willing to go along. In the words of the writer himself, "True gonzo report ing needs the talents of a master journalist, the eye of an artist/photographer, and the heavy balls of an actor. Because the writer must be a participant in the scene while hes writing it, or at least taping it, or even sketching it. O r all three." Thompson's total immersion in his work is what made it ring true, and it was his experiences that in turn lent him the credibility he needed to criticize the current state of affairs of journalism. Today's journalism seems a far cry from what Thompson and his contemporaries offered. Most of what he dared to write wouldn't be fit to print in today's main stream media, and whatever credibility a journalist has now is often dismissed or destroyed by the presence— either real or perceived—of a vested interest. Take M ichael Moore, for instance. His immersion in his films and what's seen as a no-holds-barred portrayal of his reality fits into the gonzo genre. Back in his Roger and

M e days, M oore was the advocate for the downsized G M workers in his hometown of Flint, M ichigan. In The B ig jp n e , he continued his attack on major corporations under the guise of one small person representing every other small person in America. His successes as corporate hell raiser, however, have been overshadowed by his recent attempts at political criticism. It seems whatever credibility he built up with his documentaries isn't enough to gain a foothold in the political opinions of everyday America. As his films get flashier and take on bigger foes, it becomes clear that he's no longer the little guy from Flint. Moore's a big budget director now, and the average Joe can no longer relate to him. It's not like journalism is the only field in which a little realism and bitter experience go a long way. The promis ing young upshots singing on American Idol about the per ils and pitfalls of life ring hollow when compared to the emotion and brutal honesty recorded by someone such as the .late Ray Charles. The willingness to live what one writes may not be required for commercial success, but it is definitely what elevates a writer above the pack. ■

the mcgill tribune j 2.3.05 j a& e ] 7

PREVI EWS COMEDY. Lewis Black—Le Spectrum—318 rue SteCatherine O .—Sunday, March 6. "It's my firm belief that the United States has lost its mind." The famous first words of Lewis Black's stand-up performance resonate throughout the rest of his show. The politically-inclined comedian and popular special commentator on The D aily Show rolls his frustrated act north of the border, where his controversial but hilarious views generally receive a warm welcome. The Silver Spring, M aryland native sounds off on just about any topic, but his favourite topic is always simple human stupidity. Accordingly, President Bush is spoken of quite often. Call 9 0 8 -9 0 9 0 for ticket information.

P a p e rb a c k vs. p a p e r b a c k Great Canadiana fight during CBC's literary competition DAVE BARBER eading week is a time of relaxation, adventure, and escape. For many in the undergraduate world these pursuits are realized in package vacations. But for those of us lucky enough to be burdened by a Herculean debt or course load, escape comes easily and cheaply in the form heralded in the title of the week: reading. Reading during reading week? Perhaps a mystery novel idly perused in between laps to the swim-up bar, yes. But to indulge in literature as an end in itself—crazy, right? But for those who have been lost between the pages over the past week, perhaps not so crazy after all. Fittingly, our break coincided with CBC's Canada Reads, described by host Bill Richardson as a "literary bruha-ha." Broadcast daily from February 21-25 on CBC Radio O ne and Newsworld, the Canadian battle-of-thebooks pitted five novels against each other with an eclectic panel of five distinguished Canadians, each assigned to defend one book in particular. W ith a vote at the end of each debate sending one novel back to the bookcase, the week ended with the championing of one book which "Canada reads." The panel was a spirited bunch, tossing strictly critical jabs and eschewing personal commentary throughout the week. Donna Morrissey, an aw ardW nning East Coast nov elist, promoted fellow Newfoundlander Frank Parker Day's novel, Rockbound. Sherraine MacKay, an Olympic fencer residing in Budapest, believed in Mairuth Sarsfield's tale of Montreal's black community in the 1940s, N o Crystal Stair. Quebec's own Roch Carrier, most famous for The Hockey Sweater, was curiously the only panelist to choose a FrenchCanadian novel, Jacques Poulin's Volkswagen Blues (the English version translated by Sheila Fischman). Toronto city councillor and wife of NDP leader Jack Layton, Olivia Chow, chose the post-apocalyptic O ry x and Crake by our famed Margaret Atwood. Finally, following the dropout of musician Rufus W ainwright, singer-songwriter M olly Johnson adopted Wainwright's choice, Beautiful Losers, by the icon ic Leonard Cohen. The books were as varied as the persons representing them, ranging in recognition from the unknown to internation al best sellers, and in style from speculative fiction to harsh realism. Surprisingly, the first novel to be voted back onto the shelf was Cohen's Beautiful Losers. M olly Johnson, not hav ing personally chosen the novel herself, did an apt job of

FILM. Be Cool—various theatres—begins Friday, March 4. Director G ary G ray reunites a few Pulp Fiction veter ans—along with Vince Vaughn, Cedric the Entertainer, Andre Benjamin, The Rock, Danny Devito, and other colourful characters—in Be C oo l, the sequel to 1995 s G et Shorty. Most important, John Travolta and Uma Thurman get a chance to boogie on the dance floor once again! Travolta plays Chili Palmer, a hit man who abandons his movie industry aspirations to start his own record label, meeting Thurman—the w ife of a powerful music executive—along the way. ART. Michel De Broin—Pierre-François Ouellette A rt Contemporain—372 rue Ste-Catherine O .—March 5 to A pril 17. Have you ever climbed a staircase to nowhere (besides the one near Burnside)? Take a walk to Parc Maisonneuve-Cartier, and you can lay your eyes upon one. W hile you're at it, take a good look at the artist's name and flex your memory muscles, because starting this week you can feast your eyes on some of Michel De Broin's fascinating "modern art" drawings. De Broin, whose artwork is designed to com ment on the nature of urban dwellings, is one of 15 inhouse artists at Pierre-Francois Ouellette Contemporary Art Museum, all of whom boast impressive credentials and unique ways of approaching their craft. Call 3956 0 3 2 for more information about the exhibit or visit De Broin's personal w eb site at w w w .kloud .org/m d b .

U T PPU BLISH IN G .C O M

describing, but not necessarily of defending the book. "It's disturbing, annoying, even boring, evocative, diffi cult, challenging book, but it changed the w ay Canada writes and changed the w ay Canada reads." The next to be nixed was Carriers choice, though he left the debate glad for the opportunity to promote lesserknown Québécois fiction. N o Crystal Stair and its tales of the jazz age in Montreal was axed on Thursday, leaving a David-and-Goliath meeting between Atwood's vision of the future and Day's colloquial prose of the past. W hen all stones had fallen, Rockbound was declared the novel that Canadians should read, though it was a slim majority of three votes to two that sent the Newfoundland novel to the podium. W hether you agree or not with the final decision is unimportant, as all books represented are excellent forays into Canadian literature, providing lush escapes for those of the literary mind. M aybe, just maybe, your course pack/highlighter combo can wait, and you too will discov er Canadas literati—and maybe even tune in for next year's debate. ■

MUSIC. T-t-t-tours galore! Taste o f Chaos Tour— Stade Uniprix— 2 8 5 rue Faillon O. —March 2 & 3. If your break was spent in a tamer manner than you would otherwise have liked, make up for it by attending the "Taste of Chaos" tour this week and head-banging along to a collection of "nu-punk" bands, including the Used, Senses Fail, M y Chemical Romance, and others. Epitaph Tour— C lub S o d a — 1225 boul. St-Laurent— M arch 1 1. Epitaph proves to be a record label that's more fun than a barrel of monkeys, sending a group of their artists out on tour together for collective support and exposure to each others' fans. Catch M atchbook Romance, Motion City Soundtrack, From First to Last, and Scatter the Ashes at next week's show, which w ill also feature give aways and prize packs.

123 Punk Tour— Le Spectrum— 3 18 rue Ste-Catherine O . — March 5. If you're sick to death of all this "nu" business, head down to the simply arithmetic punk extravaganza at one of Montreal's finest concert venues. Rise Against, Belvedere, and other energetic bands w ill surely com pensate for the music industry's inability to spell.

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^ ^ iim C a p tu rin g origins

F a n -d e e p -th ro a tin '-ta s tic !

African dance highlights rich history

Porn meets politics Inside Deep Throat

SID PHARASI

SUSAN CQOKE here are three things you should know about Inside Deep Throat: One: it is not about the Watergate Scandal. Two: this documentary is more entertaining than any feature film this year. Three: the original Deep Throat was a hell of a lot more than the simple story of a woman with no gag reflex who believed that her clitoris was in the back of her throat. The documentary sets out to examine the politics and uproar surrounding Deep Throat, the smash hit 1972 porn film. This was a gentler time in the porn industry, when movie-making was still about "art" and sexual liberation, as opposed to the factory operation that exists today. Upon release, Deep Throat was attacked by the Nixon government, which of course only served to increase its popularity. Suddenly, sex had come out of the closet and people were lined up around the block to see it onscreen. As one adorable grandmother tells teporters in archived footage, "I came here to see a dirty movie and that's what I got!" The censorship and moral outrage that flooded the political scene is eerily familiar; if you think that the days of the Vice Squad are over, think again. Inside Deep Throat centres around footage from the early '70s as well as present-day interviews with those caught up in the old Deep Throat frenzy. Among interviews with countless celebrities is the inclusion of Richard Nixon's now painfully ironic moralizing speech about pornography's corrupting effect on America. Inside Deep Throat bounds along with dry humour, energy, and great archival footage. A favourite a clip in which an irate feminist challenges Hugh Hefner to attach a bunny tail to his ass and see how "empowered" he feels. From Hef's claim that

he recognition of a culture's artistic icons from the past forges its identity in current society. The foray of creative endeavours by its modern artists into the fabric of contem porary culture cements it. The fact that Montreal's black community is mostly com prised of the African Diaspora explains the abundance of Afro-centric shows and festi vals in the city. Zab Maboungou, a home grown choreographer, philosopher, author, and professor has managed to intertwine her knowledge of African dance with modern Western theatre and present it to the world audience with an admirable poignancy. Maboungou's latest piece, Lwâza, is a fifty^minute dance performance—currently set in the classy Montreal Arts Interculturels (AAAI) theatre space—with three dancers and two drummers. This creation, with a title that implies the word "chatting" in the Kikongo dialect, plays on the concept of agitation and rhythm with various personalities deconstruct ing speech and language through their cho reography. The dances themselves vary from the delicate and subtle to feverish unisons of movement, while the drumming is nothing short of crisp and precise, seducing the audi ence in a rhythmic trance throughout the per formance. W hen one glances at Maboungou's endeavour, the fact that she is a highly acclaimed choreographer consistently touring the dance-theatre circuit for the past decade is not enough to fully appreciate her accom plishments. Her Montreal ..dance studio, Nyata-Nyata (4 3 7 4 boul. St-Laurent), offers

DEEPTH R O A TM O VIE.C O M

porn "liberates" women to Linda Lovelace's condem nation of the whole industry—and her Deep Throat role in particular—the film gets the debate going but by no means takes sides or exhausts the topic. Forget the Michael Moore brand of partisan fury—what w e have available at our nearby Cinéma du Parc is real documentary filmmaking. It's a fascinat ing story with the perfect soundtrack, scandals galore,and more than a little food for thought. You'd best take your friends when you go, because here's one porn experience you won't have to enjoy alone. ■

a variety of programs in African dance from the regions of G hana, M ali, the Ivory Coast, and Zim babwe that cater to novices and experienced dancers alike. Every summer, intensive two-week workshops in dance and African drumming are also available. For those deeply immersed in choreography, Nyata-Nyata offers a twcryear artistic degree program in African dance. W hen M aboungou is not busy teaching or choreo graphing dance, she engages in less physi cal philosophical pursuits. "In the West, rhythm is either an abstract thing, or limited to a sequence," she explains at a recent discussion regarding her latest book. "Rhythm is far more important than that. It links you to the universe, to the present and the past." To complement her w riting, M aboungou also teaches Western philoso phy at Laval's Collège Montmorency and reg ularly participates in academic conferences that involve the interpretation and develop ment of African artistic forms. As Maboungou's numerous theatrical pieces such as Lwâza, attest, this performer's take on rhythm is a complete manifestation of her harmonic view of life. It is a refreshing source of pride for Montreal's African commu nity to have a local artist among its midst who can educate the public about the history of African origins through art. Heya Dansel Poétique, didactique et historique de la danse africaine is Maboungou's latest published work. For more information, or to order copies, call 8499781. Check out future events at the M A I (3 680 rue Jeanne-M ancel b y calling 9821812. m

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G o tta g e t a w a y ? One big book will get you there—with enough money, too DAVE BARBER hether you've whipped by in three years or calmly meandered for seven, the impending freedom of graduation can sometimes feel like the approach of the Nothing from The Never-Ending Story. You had a blast hanging out with Atreiu, but one day the storm will come through and you'll wake up in your high school attic, alone. The reality of graduation is such that you must choose either to place your belief in books and head back into the fantasy world of academia, or to pull up your socks and venture into

the real world. Adherence to this allegory may not get anyone very far, but for those with an adventurous spirit, what will help is JeanM arc Hachey's (who spoke at M cG ill recently) The BIG G uide to Living and W orking Overseas. An incredible resource for any coed or young professional, the new fourth

edition is the perfect starting point to international careers. On top of the 2,000 organizational profiles that pinpoint where said jobs are, this big guide—a hefty load at just over 1000 pages—gives a step-by-stëp breakdown to help job seekers ensure they get the job they want, saved from the cesspool of 9-to-5ers. The guide is divided into five parts and 41 chapters, covering all aspects of international employment from profes sional placements to volunteer positions. You wouldn't think it of such a heavy volume, but The B IG G uide is quite concise and navigator-friendly. Whether you're unsure how to write an effective international CV or can't decide which N G O to work with, this guide provides—painlessly. Supported by CDROM material and a cutting-edge W eb edition, The B IG G uide to Living and W orking Overseas is a book you can bury your head in, only to come out transported to far-off, exciting lands of opportunity. I just can't guarantee any racing

REVIEWS CD. Life Begins A g a in by Jimmy Chamberlin Complex. Jimmy Chamberlin, famed as former drummer for both the Smashing Pumpkins and Zwan, has finally released a solo effort. Despite years of living the Corgan-life, his associations haven't stopped him from creat ing his own distinct sound, with only a few snippets playing homage to the "Smashing sound. Solo, Chamberlin tends to favour key boards, creating a much jazzier feel. Tracks such as the instrumental "Streetcrawlers" might leave fans of the old band scratching their heads, but they'll find refuge in the much heavier numbers such as "Cranes of Prey.” Corgan's guest appearance on "Lokicat" completes the circle between the old and new material. Life Begins Again provides a great avenue for Chamberlin's technical skill, and as a bonus, listeners are treated to talented guest performers who came along for the ride: the aforementioned Corgan, as well as Rob Dickinson of the Catherine Wheel and Bill Medley of the Righteous Brothers. Life Begins Again allows listeners to rock and chill out at the same time.

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sports HOCKEY

MARTLETS

OTTAWA

1 ( B E S T - O F- T H R E E S E R I E S )

McGill prevails over Gee-Gees in epic playoff tilt Series victory means Martlets will battle Concordia for top spot DANNY NGUYEN After an impressive stretch to conclude the regular season, as well as a 10-1-3 mark in its last 14 games against the University of Ottawa, the women's hockey team had high expecta tions for its first-round playoff matchup versus the Gee-Gees. But O ttaw a was up to the task and pushed M cG ill to the brink before the Martlets pulled out a 2-1 series win to advance to the Quebec Student Sport Federation final. Game 1 of the series took place at McConnell Arena on Wednesday, and right from the start M cG ill looked shaky. "The girls put too much pressure on them selves," said Head Coach Peter Smith of his charges, who hurt themselves with poor pass ing and shot selection while on the power play. Though Shauna Denis opened the scoring for M cG ill, O ttaw a tied the score before the end of the first period, and took a 2-1 lead early in the third. Gee-Gees goaltender M egan Takeda was strong in net, turning aw ay 2 6 saves in the second and third periods, but Valérie Paquette finally netted the equalizer with a mere 17 seconds remaining, forcing the game into overtime. After the first OT solved nothing, the two teams dropped the puck for a fifth period, and Ottawa's Jennifer Ancona finally potted the game-winner after 81 minutes and 4 5 seconds of play, sending the Gee-Gees home with a chance to wrap up the series. M cG ill regrouped in time for Friday's game in O ttawa, and was rewarded for its efforts. Goals by Denis and Katherine Safka held up, with help from Catherine Herron's 33 saves, giving M cG ill a 2-1 win that brought the series back to Montreal for the rubber match.

Series finale an intense battle Sunday afternoon's game was fast-paced from the start, though the Martlets showed a strong commitment to defensive play as well. "It was in the game plan to cut passes [and not] let them go in our zone," said blueliner Julie Lepage. "It was the only w ay to win."

THE

RED

M cG ill's ability to break out of its zone allowed Véronique Lapierre to let fly a wrist shot that beat the O ttawa netminder for a 1-0 lead. Safka extended the lead to two, midway through the second, giving M cG ill some breath ing room. But the Gee-Gees stormed back, cutting the lead in half early in the third and setting up a frenetic final period. O ttaw a outshot M cG ill by a 13-5 margin, but Herron shut the door on the G eeG ees season, as the Martlets held on for a 2-1 win in the game and the series.

Clutch leadership The series seemed to turn on the play of M cG ill's top performers. Safka scored the win ning goals in each of the final two games, and she and Lapierre asserted themselves after the Martlets spotted the Gee-Gees a one-game lead. "I believe that our leaders are always the ones to become more important in games like this, and they did their job wonderfully," said Paquette. W ith the win, M cG ill earns the right to face Concordia in another best-of-three series beginning tonight. Though the Stingers w ill be well rested after their first-round bye, it doesn't seem to phase the Martlets. "The fact w e played three intense games while they didn't play may give us the advan tage," Lapierre insisted. "W e know what w e need to do." "I'm not worried about anyone on that team," added Safka. W ith M cG ill's defeat of O ttaw a, Concordia is now assured a berth at the nation als, as the Martlets have an automatic berth as tournament hosts. But that doesn't mean there will be any decline in the intensity of this series. "It's going to be a great series between tw o very hard-working and skilled teams," Smith assured. "There's going to be great hock ey." Despite the gruelling series M cG ill just escaped, there is no reason to think that the Martlets won't be able to get fired up for a post season clash with their cross-town rivals. ■

Led by Katherine Safka's (bottom) two game-winning goals, the Martlets overcame Ottawa.

ZONE

A Te m p le w ithout a n idol M O H IT ARORA always liked John Chaney. The Temple University men's basketball coach has always been particularly fun to watch on the sidelines because he wears his heart on his sleeve, and his teams have always played in his im a g e tough, passionate, and hardworking. Chaney built the Owls program from the ground up, and now ranks fourth among college basketball's winningest active coaches. He has taken in hundreds of kids with nothing but hoop dreams, and turned them into men with degrees. Chaney has always employed a heavy hand in mould ing his players, and sometimes that tough love is toughest on him. So maybe the hall of fame coach displayed a rare moment of weakness last Tuesday, but there was no love present when he sent in a seldom-used player to rough up opposing Saint Joseph's, resulting in a season-ending injury for a Hawk player. After protesting a number of hard picks and illegal screens employed by Saint Joseph's that went uncalled by the referees, Chaney decided to take matters into the hands of reserve forward Nehemiah Ingram, sending him in for the sole purpose of committing hard fouls and, as Chaney him self put it, "sending a message." Ingram proceeded to foul

out in four minutes, but not before breaking Hawks forward John Bryant's arm, ending the senior's basketball career. Chaney's lov^brow coaching strategy is disappointing on several levels. I am as jaded and cynical as the next sports fan about the declining importance of respect and sportsmanship, but to me, Chaney was one of the few remaining footholds on those antiquated notions. I always thought of Chaney as one of those coaches who stayed true to the spirit of athletics, playing to win, but only in the right manner. But now, I don't know if that's the case. The pessimist in me is pretty convinced that this wasn't the first time Chaney employed such tactics. 'When Sammy Sosa's bat shattered, it didn't take long for me to decide that it wasn't the first time the slugger had corked his bat. It was just the first time he got caught. I get the same nagging feel ing that it's no different for Chaney. The Saint Joseph's game also .brought home the point that basketball has evolved into a much more physical game than many people notice. Basketball players are no longer just tall, skinny guys who can jump out of the arena. These are strong and powerful athletes. But with great power comes great responsibility, as they say. Saint Joseph's coach

Phil Martelli said after the game, "It's very disappointing, because the welfare of the players is all of our responsibility, and for whatever reason... [Temple] chose not to consider the welfare of my players." Consider that the National Association of Basketball Coaches passed a resolution a few years ago requesting that its members be referred to as "teacher-coach." If that is now the case, Chaney should be ashamed of the lesson he ended up teaching. But the worst part of this ugly incident, that which I will never be able to forgive Chaney for, is the fact that his actions now call into question those of every other coach. Sending in a "goon" was, I always thought, strictly the domain of Slap Shot-loving idiots in hockey. But now I won der if Scotty Bowman never resorted to "sending a mes sage." And I'm convinced that Vancouver Canucks Coach M arc Crawford ordered the hit on Steve Moore. N o w I know for sure that the Denver Broncos' strong running game is purely the work of illegal and dangerous cut blocks rather than the genius of M ike Shanahan. And I will forever assume bad intentions to be behind every batter hit by a pitch. And it's all your fault, Coach Chaney. Thanks. ■

TRACK

A N D

FIELD

QSSF

th e m cgill tribune | 2.3.05 | sports 21

C H A M P I O N S H I P S

Lady tracksters take Quebec crown

OFF

Men drop to third, making victory bittersweet for coach

THE

BEATEN

PATH

To o legit to quit

ANDREW SEGAL Based largely on their strong performances at the Quebec championships held at Tomlinson Fieldhouse on Friday and Saturday, the M cG ill track and field teams will be sending 22 competitors to the Canadian Interuniversity Sport nationals March 1 0 1 2 in W innipeg. The women’s side was especially remarkable, earning 17 medals, including six golds, in beating Sherbrooke 12 9 points to 12 0 for the overall title. Leading the w ay for the Martlets were Laura W ilson, w ho captured the 150Ometres and the 3000m , and Catherine Foley, who was a part of M cG ills vic torious 4 x 2 0 0 and 4 x 4 0 0 relay teams. Genevieve Jenkins, last week’s Athlete of the W eek, was another bright spot for M cG ill, as the third-year runner from California nabbed three gold medals and a silver. Jenkins was impressed by her team, Doth on and off the track. "W e put on a really good show, not only for performance but for team spirit,” she said. "The pole vaulters didn't have to compete at all on Saturday, but they came to support us. It shows what mind frame this team is in." According to Jenkins, the psyche of team members is important as they head into nationals. She noted that if the squad hopes to rebound from last year's disappointing finish — the women tied for 15th of 16 teams, while the men were in last place of 19 at the championships—the returning athletes will have to put their 2 0 0 4 experience behind them, some thing that is difficult, but possible. "Last year, people let the pressure of nationals get to them, and it is scary," Jenkins said. "They'll be more relaxed this time because w e've raced a lot this season." However, for Head Coach Dennis Barrett, the meet did n't come off as smoothly as it could have. He felt that a num ber of runners weren't able to compete at the standard he knows they're capable of. This was particularly true of the men, who haven't won a conference title in seven years. The Redmen placed a distant third with 7 8 points, well back of Sherbrooke, who won the meet with 150 points. "W e've been lacking on the men's side," he said. "The team was a little down, and I would have liked to have more people going to nationals." W h ile there are 10 males among the 22 M cG ill repre sentatives to nationals, only two Redmen won individual gold medals over the w eekend— Dan St. M ichael and Rob Salvatore, both converted football players, in the high jump and shot put, respectively—something for which Barrett, as coach, takes the blame.

HOCKEY

REDMEN

PLAYOFF

Buzz off if you don't think trivia's a real sport ANDREW SEGAL

T VLADIMIR EREMIN

The T&F crew is jetpackin' it to the Pegger. Indeed, the coach claims he can't be happy unless both teams win titles, and that any victories are bittersweet because of the athletes w ho are left behind. "That's the difference between track and a team sport—a team win isn't the same," Barrett said. W hen a team goes to nationals, everybody gets to go. And you want everyone to make it, to share it with the team." Barrett plans to address his team's shortcoming in the future by recruiting heavily, especially locally, and filling out the field events. For now, though, the key for Barrett is looking ahead to nationals. His goal is having his squad return to prominence by placing in the top 10, a position M cG ill hasn't achieved since star runner Sarah Ali-Khan departed two years ago. To do that, there need to be some national medal winners within McG ill's midst, which Barrett believes there are. "I think the relays can medal," he said. "The men's 4 x 2 0 0 , the women's 4 x 2 0 0 ; the men's 4 x 8 0 0 has an outside chance if it can pull together, so does the women's 4 x 8 0 0 . Genevieve Jenkins and Jeff M cC abe can do it in the 1000m , and Troye Carrington has an outside shot in the 300m ." Jenkins, for one, is ready to take on Canada's best. "W e're really strong," she said of the 4x8 00 m relay group, for which she won a gold medal while running the sec ond leg on Saturday. "I know that everyone on the team can run faster, so it's good to go into nationals with a team you feel that w ay about." ■

PREVIEW

Big Red machine hopes to avoid rusting Battle-tested O ttawa to provide a challenge dan

M cQ u il l a n ............. ..........

Fresh off a first-round playoff bye—courtesy of finishing atop the standings for the first time in 5 9 years—the mens hock ey team had better be ready to get right into the thick of post season hockey action when it hosts the Ottawa Gee-Gees in a best-of-three Ontario University Athletics playoff that gets under w ay tonight at 7pm at McConnell Arena. M cG ill would also host game three, if necessary, on Sunday at 7pm. The GeeGees got here by winning two hard-fought games over the Concordia Stingers in the first round of the playoffs, emerging victorious in Sunday's third and deciding game by scoring in the second overtime period. Ottawa is clearly pre pared to take on the Redmen after a week-long battle with Concordia; the question now becomes whether McGill's pass to the second round will be beneficial or detrimental. The Redmen's playoff position was in doubt until the final day of the regular season, when M cG ill overcame its longtime nemesis, the Patriotes of Université du Québec à Trois-Rivières, 21 on February 2 0 at McConnell. The Redmen, the best defen sive team in the league, were able to hold the offensive-minded Patriotes in check, keeping things scoreless through two. In the third, though, leading scorer Doug Orr put the Redmen on the board, courtesy of a great pass from Shawn Shewchuk that set Orr up perfectly. UQTR tied things up three minutes after Orr's marker, but Mathieu Leclerc made sure that the near sellout crowd would go home happy, scoring the eventual game winner at 12 :46 of the frame, making a nice move with the puck to deke Patriotes goalie Dany Dallaire. This season marked only the sixth time in 35 campaigns that the Redmen had taken a season series from the Patriotes. That makes the victory quite significant, according to Head Coach Martin Raymond, who is just 41-128-15 lifetime against

he first tournament was held in October, a pre-season invitational that allowed teams to warm up for the gru elling regular season that lay ahead. Following that, for the next few months, members of the teams would regularly congregate, scrimmage against each other, hone their reflex es and skills, and leave knowing they had a better shot at the championship for having done it. After weeks of practicing, the regular season hit its apex. The teams' members were raring to go for last month's national championships, where one squad emerged victori ous, having successfully dispatched of all comers from across Ontario and Quebec. Now, all that is left for this group of warriors—of which I am a member—is to compete for conti nent-wide supremacy in April. Is this crew composed of McGill's wrestlers? Please w e would body slam them. Is it the tennis team? N o w a y — they don't have the balls to take us on. Instead, these intrep id heroes are none other than the members of M cG ill trivia team, and, above all, practitioners of a legitimate sport. G o ahead. Scoff at the notion of considering trivia, that battle of all brains and no brawn, a sport. But recall for a second those events you intuitively consider sports: basket ball, baseball, hockey, and race car driving are probably among them. W ell, trivia's got them beat worse than the English navy beat the usurper of the throne of Zanzibar in

the Pats. "I'm very proud of this hockey club—it showed great char acter," he said. "It means so much mentally to win a big game. It proves w e can win a big game like this [against UQTR when it counts.]" The Redmen are going to need to summon that big game mentality against the dangerous GeeOees, who bring a bal anced offensive attack that features five players who scored 20 or more points this season. Should M cG ill get past Ottawa, the Redmen are then in line for another confrontation with the Patriotes, who will battle the University of Toronto in their quarter final. But despite a 4-3 loss to Ottawa in the season's penultimate game, the Redmen should have little to worry about if they con tinue to play as they have of late. Since completing its own ver sion of tne Tour de France—in which it played five games over winter break in France and Switzerland—the squad has truly started to hit its stride. The red-hot Redmen ran off seven straight wins while going 9-2 in the season's second half, and it seems that M cG ill really benefited from competing against the superior European clubs. O f course, Shewchuk's 17 points after the break and Mathieu Poitras' league-leading 1.99 goals against average didn't hurt, either. So it comes as no surprise that, according to defenceman Daniel Jacob, if the team just keeps playing at the same level it has been over the past couple of months, victories should come easily in the playoffs. "W e need to get rid of the injuries, the bumps and bruises," he said of the team's plans for the post-season. "Then just go over the basics; hockey is not rocket science." Perhaps not, but after so many years of falling short, it looks as though the Redmen are finally ready to blast off to the nation al championship. ■ — W ith additional reporting b y Andrew Segal

1896. W hen you first think of the NBA, what comes to mind? N o, not child support payments, but close. Groupies. And, truth be told, trivia players are busy fending off members of the opposite sex with a stick. W hen I played on my high school team, w e ordered shirts for team members to wear for our televised games (yes, that's right, they broadcast trivia matchups; in fact, it's likely more Torontonians watched us than tuned in the Argos on any given night), and were then inundated by requests from women who wanted to have their very own version of our uniform—some even went so far as to try and rip it off our backs, in deranged David Beckham-fan-style. So while LeBron may have his marketing empire across the continent, I'm content in knowing that the "SEGAL" jersey will always be number one in north-central Toronto, if you get my drift. H ow about M ajor League Baseball's most defining fea ture? If my girlfriend has taught me anything, it's that play moves far too slowly. W ell, in trivia, there's no waiting for the polar ice caps to melt while Nomar does his pre-pitch rou tine. W e dive right into the action, doing nine straight min utes of questions and answers at breakneck speed. W e then take about 6 0 seconds for halftime (and to think the sissies in other sports need 15 minutes), and then go for broke for the final nine minutes—and w e repeat this up to 15 times in a given single-day tournament. By w ay o f comparison, Curt Schilling's foot would have fallen off if he had needed to replicate the feats of the average trivia player. Another way we've got baseball clobbered? Forget the long ball—as I noted above, chicks dig the quick buzz. But that aside, what really brings a sport into the pan theon is the ubiquitous, feel-good movie. Basketball has Hoosiers, baseball The Natural, and hockey has Miracle. Trivia, however, can compete with this noble triumvirate. Ever heard of Pray for me, Paul Henderson? It's only the finest coming-of-age movie ever to link high school trivia with the 1972 Summit Series. O f course, w e also can't forget about the trivia-centric episodes of classic shows like Saved b y the Bell and Undergrads. Clearly, when it comes to on-screen drama, trivia's got a metaphorical, if not physical, leg up on the com petition. Sure, you can argue that true sports require actual phys ical activity, or that they don't involve a bunch of people sit ting around desks. But how does driving a stock car make a guy more athletic than using quick reflexes to hit the buzzer before someone else does? Is there more thinking involved in the perfect golf shot than pulling the perfect trivia answer out of your ass? I think not. Plus, I sweat while playing, which must count for something—although, then again, I do tend to sweat while eating. So if you attend a meeting of the Trivia Club, or watch these masters of the mind in action as they prepare to do bat tle with North America's best in N e w Orleans from April 89, don't look down upon them and disparage them. They're athletes, plain and simple—after all, heading out to the bars after a day of tough competition does involve some exercise, right? ■

2 2 sports | 2.3.05 | the mcgill tribune

BASKETBALL

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Forces.

d a n s les Forces

After a stirring 57-52 victory over Université du Québec à Montréal Friday night at Love Competition Hall, the women's basketball team had no choice but to play the wait ing game. The Martlets emerged from their final contest of the sea son at 3-13, needing the 2-13 Citadins to lose Saturday against Concordia in order to get into the playoffs. And when the Stingers put the finishing touches on a 62-41 trouncing, Head Coach Ryan Thornes late-season philosophy seemed to have paid off. "W e put ourselves in a pretty good position, in that we could make the playoffs by winning two or our final three," he said. "W e wanted that game to mean something, playing our last game at home." The team's final three games came against Laval, Concordia, and UQÀM, and it seemed unlikely that the Martlets would defeat either of the two strong opponents in order to set up Saturday's decisive matchup. But after falling to Laval 58-41 on the road, the Martlets came home stunned the then 1Oth-ranked Stingers 57 -49 after trailing by as many as 20 points in the second half. Despite refusing to term it "unexpected," Thorne does see the penultimate victory as something of a turning point for a team that has struggled much of the w ay this season. "You always want to finish strong, and we're starting to do a little bit positively," he noted. "It showed that we could beat this team, and it inspired our players, especially some of the graduating ones." The glow from that victory seemed to resonate with the Martlets on Saturday, when three players scored in double fig ures, as M cG ill overcame an eight-point deficit with under six minutes to go. Thorne now has to hope that the momentum of the Martlets' two-game winning streak carries over into the team's single-game semi-final against Laval tonight. M cG ill will defi nitely be in tough in Ste-Foy, as the Martlets have lost all four games against the Rouge et O r by double-digit margins. However, Thorne saw improvement in the teams' last meeting, when M cG ill trailed by only five right before the end of the first half. W ith that in mind, the coach has a plan to knock off the talent-laden squad, which is currently ranked sixth in the

VLADIMIR EREMIN

The women wouldn't let U Q À M keep them down. country. "W e've just got to execute properly," he said. "Last time we played them to a five point first half, one of the closest we've had against them. So we just have to go out and exe cute, play solid man-to-man defence, and attack through the high post, where we've got one of the best shooters in the conference [in Alisen Salusbury]." Thorne also needs to ensure that the Martlets get over their tendency to start slowly; even in its victories this season, M cG ill has never led at the half, and trailed 25-19 Saturday night. But Thorne feels that if the Martlet squad that launched some impressive second-half comebacks comes to play, the outcome of the game will be up in the air. "I feel we have a pretty good chance to win, about 505 0 ," he said. "It depends on which team shows up. W e have to play like we do in the second half, because we can't dig ourselves into a hole against Laval." After tonight, however, speculation will no longer be an option; Thorne and the Martlets need to put together a full 4 0 minutes if they plan to prove they can take on the best team in the province, and move on to the next round. ■

c an a d ie n n e s .

TWO-POINT

CONVERSION

• Physiotherapists

• Ingénieurs

• S o c ia l W orkers

• Physiothérapeutes

• Pilots

• Travailleurs

Oscar a t the bat: Hollywood just can't create stories like the sports world

• Engineers

• D octors

s o ciau x/

• N urses

travailleuses

• P h a rm a cis ts

s o ciales

• N aval O fficers

• Pilotes • M éd e cin s

To learn m o re,

• In firm ie rs /

c o n ta c t us today.

infirm ières • P h a rm a c ie n s / p h a rm a c ie n n e s • O fficiers de m arin e Pour o b ten ir d e plus a m p le s re n se ig n em e n ts , veuillez c o m m u n iq u e r a v e c nous d ès au jo u rd ’hui.

Strong. Proud. Today's Canadian Forces. Découvrez vos forces dans les Forces canadiennes. 1 800 856-8488

www.forces.gc.ca

Canada

M O H IT ARORA On Sunday night, the stars of the big screen were on display in all their glamorous glory at the 77th annual Academy Awards. In honour of the wonderful tradition that is the Oscars, the Tribune has decided to hand out its own awards to some of the more memorable stories and perform ances in the sporting world. W e bring you the Shatners. Million Dollar Baby— A touching tale about an athletes will and determination in overcoming adversity. B ab y is the story of Vince Carter, who shatters the conventional notion that the best and highest-paid player on a team is somehow obligated to be a leader of the franchise that did its best to cater to him. Notice the tortured expression Carter maintains as he is forced to endure horrific abuse such as hacks on the wrist and defensive assignments. The Aviator— In this tragic tale of a wealthy and talent ed individual succumbing to his mental fragility, Ricky W illiams shuns the world he has always known in his relent less pursuit to take flight. He discards his natural abilities for those of holistic medicine and a magical green substance. Sadly, the story ends in disappointment, as his magnificent bong, the "Spruce Goose," cannot grant him the liftoff he so desperately craves. The Passion o f the Christ— Devout Christian Deion Sanders spent a tremendous amount of time, energy, and money into creating the story of His involvement in the sport ing world. This true-to-the-Bible tale explores the idea that He really does care w ho wins football games. This film was very controversial, as it raised the ire of a legion of viewers who firmly believe that the outcome o f sporting events rests on something as trivial as athletic performance. A Very Long Engagement’— Star-crossed lovers do what they can to be together despite the pressure and scrutiny they face. G ary Bettman and Bob, G oodenow are caught in the middle as their dueling families, the NHL and the NHLPA, w age a vicious w ar against each other. Bettman and G oodenow maintain public support for their respective camps, but this is all a ruse to allow them to meet privately in a series of passionate "negotiations."

O f course, not all splendid achievements in sports get the recognition they deserve. Here are some of the more critical ly acclaimed but unher alded productions. A Series of Unfortunate Evente—This documentary follows the up-and-mostly-down lives of the Toronto Raptors brain trust, Head Coach Sam M itchell and General Manager Rob Babcock. The film details the numerous fistfights between Mitchell ana his players, as well as Babcock fighting an NBA.COM uphill battle in getting Vince Carter... the NBAs own other G M s to return his calls, or even remember million-dollar baby. his name, for that matter. Sideways— Jose Canseco directs this absurd comedy about the presence of steroids in baseball and the w ay in which these enormous athletes must walk through doorways. Eternal Sunshine o f the Spotless M in d — Maurice Clarett is irva race against time as his 15 minutes of fame quickly wind down and he struggles to prevent being erased from the memory of NFL scouts. The M otorcycle Diaries— In this story, Chicago Bulls point guard-jay W illiqms recounts all the bitchin' times he had riding his Hog. (What, too soon?) In comparing the cinematic achievements of the past year to those that happened in sports, w e see that one thing is clear: Hollywood could never create the vast array of char acters, comedy, and drama that the world of sports seems to churn out so effortlessly. This is surely one well that will never run dry. ■

th e m cgill tribune | 2.3.05 | sports 2 3

PLAYOFF

RESULTS

A N D

SCHEDULES

O U A men's hockey (all series best-of-tnree)

Semi-finals (begin March 9) O tta w a /M cG ill vs. Toronto/UQTR W estern/W aterloo vs. Lakehead/York

QUBL women's basketball (all series single-elimination)

First round UQTR def. RMC 2-0 O ttawa def. Concordia 2-1 W aterloo def. Laurier 2-1 Lakehead def. Guelph 2-0

QSSF women's hockey (all series best of three)

Semi-finals (both W ednesday at 7pm) Laval vs. McGill Bishops vs. Concordia

Semi-finals McGill def. Ottawa 2-1

Finals (Saturday, time TBC) Laval/M cG ill vs. B ishops/C oncordia

Quarter-finals —upcoming series (all series except Western-Waterloo begin tonight; all to be completed by Sunday) McGill vs. O ttawa Toronto vs. UQTR York vs. Lakehead Western vs. W aterloo

Finals C oncordia vs. M cG ill, W ednesday 7:30pm McGill vs. Concordia, Friday 7:30pm Concordia vs. McGill, Sunday 4pm (if nec essary)

ROUND

QUBL men's basketball

McGill finished in fifth place in the confer ence with a 2-14 record and did not quali fy for the playoffs.

! j

I 1

McGill skier wraps up Heil of a season Jennifer Heil became the W orld Cup champion of moguls skiing for the second time in as many years last weekend despite narrowly missing a podium finish in the season's final event in Voss, N o rw a y last weekend. Heil finished fourth in ikie event, only 0 .0 4 seconds behind the third-place finisher, but it was inconsequential as she has already wrapped up the title going into the compe tition. The results at Voss left Heil with 7 8 0 points for the season, w ell ahead of N orw ay's Kari Traa, whose 571 points were good enough for second. Heil won five of 1 1 events on the year, despite competing with a broken right thumb. As a result, she was unable to hoist the trophy with her right hand.

j ! |

SCORING SUMMARY First Period 1. M cG ill - V. Lapierre [). Lepage, C. Smith) 9 :2 9 PENALTIES: (none)

INDOOR S O C C E R -A did as M cG ill Indoor Classic, Friday through Sunday, Tomlinson Fieldhouse Between 32 and 3 6 teams will battle for the title as the Redmen and Martlets host the ninth edition of the classic, the largest indoor tourna ment in Eastern Canada.

M cG ill swimmers François Castonguay and Heather Bell enjoyed a productive weekend in the pool, with Castonguay collecting two gold medals and Beli totaling a silver and tw o bronze over the three-day meet in Edmonton. Castonguay captured his first event on Friday, winning the 400-metre individual medley in a time of 4 :2 0 .5 5 . Bell finished second in the 100m breaststroke in 1 :1 0 .4 0 , good enough for the silver medal. Bell then took bronze in the 20 0m breaststroke on Saturday, and both took home medals after Sunday's events, Bell added another third-place finish in the 50m breaststroke, while Castonguay won the 20 0m IM in a time of 2 : 0 2 . 5 8 . Both were named All-Canadians for their efforts this season. M cG ill's men finished 1 1th out of the 2 4 teams in competition, while the Martlets finished 10th.

McGill Martlets 2 vs. Ottawa Gee-Gees 1 Game three of a best-of-three semi-final Sunday, February 2 7 @ AAcConnell Arena

HOCKEY PLAYOFFS—See above for schedules The Martlets are already guaranteed their spot in the national cham pionship, but would prefer to win Quebec outright and attempt to avoid a date with the Alberta Pandas in pool play; the Redmen, on the other hand, need to advance to the O U A final to get in, which means they need to take two more post-season series.

HORN

Castonguay, Bell enjoy medal rush at swimming nationals

BOX SCORE

DECK

THE

j | I

Second Period 2. M cG ill - K. Safka (V. Paquette) 6 :0 9 PENALTIES: AAcGill - N . MacDonald (Interefere), 12: 38

COLLEGE BASKETBALL—Illinois @ O hio State, Saturday, noon on CBS N o team has gone undefeated through an entire N C A A season (including the tournament) since Indiana did it in 1976. If the lllini keep up their current pace, they have a shot at completing the feat.

Third Period 3 O ttaw a - R. Jennison Ü- Ancona, J. Garneau) 0 :5 3 PENALTIES: AAcGill - B. Privée (Rough), 12 :38

N LL-B uffalo @ Toronto, Friday, 7:3 0pm on Sportsnet The visiting Bandits (how come no other sports team has picked up this amazing nickname?) faceoff agiainst their Q E W rivals the Rock in an epic matchup for first place in the premier lacrosse leagues East division. The teams hate each other and the sin bins are consistently occupied. It's as close to hockey as you're gonna get, alright.

SHOTS BY PERIOD 1 2 3 Total M cG ill 17 13 5 35 O ttaw a 7 7 13 2 7

QUICK HITS

Redmen bow out of basketball contention

i !

POWER PLAYS (goals/chances): M cG ill: 0 / 0 O ttaw a: 0 / 2

GOALTENDERS: AAcGill: Catherine Herron (W, 6 0 :0 0 , I G A, 2 6 saves) O ttawa: AAegan Takeda (L, 5 8 : 18 , 2G A, 33 saves)

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Skiers speed to title

ii VT Li yW ~, i.UHjk ” %!l Hana Askren ♦ Wrestling ♦ AAAI Arabic Literature ♦ Los Angeles Q: The wrestling teams at McGill are pretty unique in that the men and women train er so much. How does that each wrestle/s develop ment? A: W e're a small team, so w e have to throw the girls against the guys to get a matchup in weight. But it's impor tant for a wrestler to train against a combination of bigger and faster competitors, so it works out well, especially since our women's program is more expe rienced, whereas many of the men are beginners. Q : If it's so effective, why don't other wrestling teams do this? A: I guess because they don't have to. Bigger teams have enough wrestlers on both sides, so they don't put the guys and girls against each other because it's the status quo That way, nobody has to deal with being uncomfortable wrestling someone of the opposite sex. Q ; You caused quite a stir

earlier this year when you won at the US Maccabiah trials comagainst men. W hat was e? A: To me, it was just anoth er tournament. But everyone was standing around and cheering. I got a lot of approving looks from older coaches. Q: You're also the assistant coach of the wrestling teams. What's on your agenda in that capacity? A: W e're trying to expand our recruiting and find wrestlers outside of Quebec, because the sport isn't very big here. W e also do the bake sale thing and try to get money from alumni, like all the smaller sports at AAcGill. Q : W hat's next for the wrestling teams this season? A: The nationals are com ing up [on March 4 and 5 in St. Catharines, Ontario]. W e sent three girls and four guys to a qualifying event in New Brunswick last month, two of the guys and all three girls qualified for the CIS championships.

SPORTS

M O V | !

TRIVIA

W ith Sunday night's Oscars still on our minds, we 1 have decided to celebrate Hollywood's great love of sfx>rts with this week's trivia questions.

| I |

1 .W hat was the name of Rocky Balboa's opponent in the title fight at the end of Rocky?

The ghost of which baseball player visits Kevin Costner

in the Iowa cornfields in Field o f Dreams? 3.

A vocal crowd of 9 1 2 packed Love Competition Hall Friday night, hoping to urge the Redmen on and propel them into the playoffs. But their efforts, as well as those of the Red 'n' W hite, were to no avail as M cG ill dropped on a 80 -69 decision to-the Université du Q uébec à Montréal, eliminat ing the Redmen from playoff contention. Derek Armstrong led M cG ill with 19 points on the night in what turned out to be his final outing in a Redmen uniform. Three others played their final games as well, with Andrew Bier and Denburk Reid tallying 1.5 points apiece, while G reg Rembeyo chipped in six points and a game-high 10 rebounds. But M cG ill was unable to overcome a balanced U Q À M attack that saw five Citadins reach double figures in points. After the game, the fans in attendance showed their appreciation to Reid, w ho leaves M cG ill as its all-time leading scorer, with 2 , 2 2 4 points in 143 career games for the Red 'n' W hite, with a lengthy standing ovation at the conclusion of the game.

Hickory High was coached by what actor in Hoosiers?

4 . Robert De Niro, Joe Pesci, and Martin Scorsese team up in Raging Bull, based on what boxer? 5. The three goon brothers in Slap Shot share the same name as what effeminate boy band?

By winning two races this past weekend at Le Relais resort in Lac Beauport, the M cG ill women's alpine ski team has assured itself of its sixth straight conference title. The team has been particularly dominant this year, w in ning six straight races and clinching the title even with a week left to go in the season after opening up a lead of more than 1 ,0 0 0 points. The only thing remaining to be decided is the individual scoring title, which features a fierce battle between M cG ill teammates Kaylyn M orton and Alyson Bobby. M orton and Bobby finished 1-2 in each race on Saturday and Sunday, so M orton maintains a slim 30-point lead heading into the season's final competition, which w ill be run at M ont Garceau in St-Donat from March 18-19. O n the men's side, M cG ill sits fifth overall with 1,91 2. . Daniel Forest and N icolas Zyromski are the top Redmen scorers, with Forest ranked 21st of 9 2 skiers in the overall scoring race, while Zyromski, last year's overall winner, is ' tied for 28th, in part because he took some time off to com pete in January's W orld University Games.

N C A A pool

W hat Oliver Stone movie stars Oscar-winner Jamie Foxx as quarterback W illie Beamon?

Join the Sports section's March

7. W hat former talk show host played third base for the Rockford Peaches in A League o f Their O w n ? )

8. W h a t game show host is paired with Happy Gilmore

in a pro-am tournament?

Madness pool, and compete |

for (fabulous) prizes. E-mail sports@ tribune.mcgill.ca

by March 16 at 11pm for jo s p g qog g yeuuoQ U 9 A IQ A u y

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McGill Alumni Association Presents

BACKPACK TO BRIEFCASE Look out. w orld, here you com e! The M cGill Alum ni Association is hosting its first annual life skills conference, First Annual "Life After McGill" Backpack to B riefcase, from M arch 10th to 13th, 2 005. S uccessful M cGill alum ni w ill lead sem inars and talks Conference: real-w orld life lesson s, including how to m anage your personal finances, dining etiquette, graduate sch ool, and m ore. Events are free o f charge u nless otherw ise indicated, "Success occurs when and hosted at M artlet House, 1430 Peel S treet. W e're still preparation meets adding new sem inars and gu e st sp eakers; look for updates! opportunity" Register for three or more seminars,

and receive this complimentary M cGill briefcase.

Backpack to Briefcase Conference Agenda 2005 KEY From M ontreal to M oscow: A Guide to Marketing Yourself

Keynote Speaker: Heidi Hollinger B A 90 Join us for an afternoon with Heidi Hollinger, a unique McGill alumna who went from her studies at McGill to a career as an award-winning photo journalist in Moscow. Ms. Hollinger will share practical career tips, including how to m arket yourself, how to make career opportunities work for you, and how to have a professional adven ture. Ms. Hollinger has photographed many world leaders including Vladm ir Putin, Fidel Castro, Mikhail Gorbachev, and the Dalai Lama. Faculty Club Ballroom 3450 McTavish Street 2:00pm to 3 :00pm Capacity: 200 students

NOTE

Conference Welcome: "From Backpack to Briefcase”

Keynote Speaker: Richard Pound OC, OQ, QC, FCA, BCom'62, BCL'67 Don't m iss an evening with the Chancellor of McGill University, as he discusses his McGill experience and his four exciting careers, includ ing founding Chairman o f the World Anti-D oping Agency, m ember International Olym pic Com m ittee, partner in the Stikeman Elliott law firm , and distinguished author. Faculty Club Ballroom 3450 McTavish Street 4:00pm to 5:30pm Capacity: 200 students

See

our

w e b s i t e

S P E A K E R S Keynote Speaker: Donna Nebenzahl BA'75 Join us for an interactive lecture by Donna Nebenzahl, a feature w riter and colum nist for the Montreal Gazette, as she shares her life experi ence as an journalist and international author in both print and televised media. Ms. Nebenzahl's first book. Womankind: Faces of Change Around the World, traces the journey she made with photographer Nance Ackerm an as they encountered 45 activist women around the globe. Faculty Club Ballroom 3450 McTavish Street 1:00pm to 2:30pm Capacity: 200 students

for

First Downs and Deadlines

Keynote Speaker: Larry Smith BCL'76 New Course Join us for an exciting lecture with Larry Smith, current President and CEO o f the Montreal Alouettes Football Club, and form er Publisher and President of the Montreal Gazette as he shares his professional experiences and insight into working in both official languages. Faculty Club Ballroom 3450 McTavish Street 3:00pm to 4:30pm Capacity: 200 students

d e t ai l

A G E N D A Thursday, March 10 Action Plan: Everything You Need to Know Before You Start Your Job Search Looking for a job requires lots of organization. This workshop will provide you with the tools you need to plan your job search. Cindy Mancuso M Ed'98 Career Developm ent O fficer at M cGill's Career and Placement Service M artlet House (Gales Room) 10:00am to 11:00am Capacity: 30 students Register Now Dining Etiquette (Four-Course Dinner) Only a few spaces left! (Course also offered on Friday and Saturday) Not sure which fork to use? How to pick up the cheque? Which bread plate is yours? Business and social m eetings are often held over a meal, and people can find them selves confused and self-conscious while navigating a table setting. Our course on dining etiquette will teach you the basics and let you concentrate on the m ost im portant part of the meal -- the conversation. Mayme Vineberg BA'72 MLS'74 Director o f Intim ate Settings Etiquette School Faculty Club Dining Room 3450 McTavish Street 6:00pm to 9:00pm , Capacity: 40 Meal Choice o f Tropical Mango Chicken Breast or Vegetarian Dish Cost: $15 for course materials*

Friday, March 11 Staying Healthy in the Real World Breakfast Join us fo r the m ost im portant meal o f the day and learn all about how to manage your person al health after graduation without spending a for tune. Anne-M arie Mitchell BSc(NutrSc)'04 Nutritionist at M EDISYS Health Group M artlet House, Main Floor Conference Room Com plim entary breakfast will be served. 9:00am to 10:00am Capacity: 40 students How to Manage Your Personal Finances Only a few spaces left! If you have questions about how to manage your m oney after you graduate, what kinds o f services banks and investm ent com panies offer, o r how to get out of debt (or avoid it), this sem inar is for you. No financial know-how required. Daniel Lalonde BCom'76 Financial Advisor at National Bank Financial M artlet House, Main Floor Conference Room 11:00am to 12:00pm Capacity: 40 students C ivic Duties Lunch: How to Become an Active Member o f Your Local Community and Charities There are many opportunities to contribute to the

world around you. But why is it im portant to know who you are and what you like to do first? As every McGill graduate is a unique addition to his o r her local community, this humorous and insightful sem inar will discuss what kinds of vol unteer opportunities are out there, and how to find the tim e to make a positive change. Douglass McDougall BA '67 Form er President of the Westm ount Municipal Association M artlet House, Gales Room, 2nd Floor Com plim entary lunch will be served. 11:00am to 12:00pm Capacity: 40 students Dressed for Success (Feminine Dress) Only a few spaces left! Want to know about professional dress codes, but still want to maintain your personal sense of style without spending a fortune? Our fashion consultant and hair and m ake-up artists will teach you about dressing for the business world, offer personal groom ing tips, and provide guid ance as to how your wardrobe needs to grow to suit the needs o f your new job. This hands-on sem inar will be a blast! Led by Francine Langevine BA’78 Director o f Personal Shopping at Ogilvy M artlet House, Main Floor Conference Room 3:00pm to 5:00pm Capacity: 40 students Dining Etiquette (Four-Course Dinner) Not sure which fork to use? What about how to pick up the cheque? Or which bread plate is yours? Business and social m eetings are often held over a meal, and people can find them selves confused and self-conscious while navi gating a table setting. Our course on dining eti quette will teach you the basics and let you concentrate on the m ost im portant part o f the meal - the conversation. Mayme Vineberg BA 72 MLS 74 Director of Intim ate Settings Etiquette School Faculty Club Dining Room 6:00pm to 9:00pm Capacity: 40 students Meal Choice o f Dore Am andine or Vegetarian Dish Cost: $15 for course materials*

Saturday, March 12 Interview Skills Breakfast Only a few spaces left! So you finally get an invitation to a jo b interview. What will you say? How will you make a good first im pression? How will you dress? The answers to these and other questions will be addressed during the workshop. Gregg Blachford, Director of M cGill's Career and Placem ent Services Martlet House, Main Floor Conference Room Com plim entary breakfast will be served.

9:30am to 11:00am Capacity: 40 students Networking Your Way to the Job You Want Networking, schm oozing, bonding... whatever you call it, an effective jo b search involves m eeting people who work in your target career area. This workshop will dem onstrate techniques to help you get started. Gregg Blachford, Director of M cGill's Career and Placem ent Service M artlet House, Gales Room, 2nd Poor 11:00am to 12:30pm Capacity: 30 students Dressed for Success (Masculine Dress) There's m ore to dressing for work than putting on a suit and tie. Join us for this fun, easy, no-non sense sem inar on m asculine attire and style for young people in the professional world. Our instructor will offer practical tips and exam ples (like how to tie a bowtie). Scott Rivard, District Manager o f Harry Rosen Martlet House, Main Floor Conference Room 11:30am to 1:00pm Capacity: 40 students Health Insurance 101 Finishing school or starting a new jo b often means you need to find your own health insur ance plan - but what is health Insurance any way? What kinds o f coverage will you need? What about dental insurance? Or life insur ance? This inform ation sem inar will discuss all the basics of health, dental, and life insurance available fo r people getting ready to finish school, what kinds o f coverage options are out there, what you actually need, and how to avoid insurance gim m icks. Enna Kaplun, Relationship Manager of Manulife Insurance M artlet House, Main FToor Conference Room 1:15pm to 2:45pm Capacity: 40 students Get Covered: An Easy Guide fo Property Insurance - New Course Going to be on your own for the first tim e? Many young adults don’t realize their posses sions aren’t covered by their parents' insurance until it's too late. But what kind o f insurance do you need? And what kinds can you definitely do without? Join us for this sem inar to learn about the different liabilities and responsibilities that apply to you and what insurance options are out there for students once they finish school. Our instructor will discuss home, tenant, property, and auto insurance. Chantel Langelier Developm ent and Training Officer at Meloche Monnex Insurance M artlet House, Main Floor Conference Room 3:00pm to 4:00pm Capacity: 40 students

Dining Etiquette (Four-Course Lunch) Not sure which fork to use? What about how to pick-up the cheque? Or which bread plate is yours? Business and social m eetings are often held over a meal, and people can find them selves confused and self-conscious while navi gating a table setting. Our course on dining eti quette will teach you the basics and let you concentrate on the m ost im portant part o f the meal - the conversation. Mayme Vineberg BA’72, MLS’74 Director o f Intimate Settings Etiquette School Montreal Athletics Association Dining Room 2070 Peel Street 1:00pm to 4:00pm Capacity: 40 students Meal Choice of Poached Salmon or Vegetarian Dish Cost: $15 for course materials*

Sunday, March 13 Work and Study Abroad Breakfast: Guidelines for Success This workshop will discuss the advantages of working and studying abroad and exam ine the steps needed to enhance your chances o f suc ceeding. Janice Tester Career Developm ent Officer at M cGill's Career and Placem ent Service 9:30am to 11:00am M artlet House, Main Floor Conference Room Com plim entary breakfast will be served. Capacity: 40 students First Year on the Job You've got the job, now what? This business and workplace etiquette sem inar will teach you how to succeed at your new job, the do's and don'ts o f being the new person in the office, and how to clim b the com pany ladder. Janice Tester Career Developm ent Officer at M cGill's Career and Placem ent Service 11:30am to 1:00pm M artlet House, Gales Room, 2nd Roor Capacity: 40 students Is Grad School Right for Me? Interested in graduate studies, but not sure if it's the right career move for you? Join us for a dis cussion on what to expect from graduate and post-doctoral studies, and if they are right for you. Martha Crago BA'68, M A'70, PhD'88 Associate Provost (Academ ic Program s) o f McGill University M artlet House, Main Floor Conference Room 11:30am to 1:00pm Capacity: 40 students

•Please m ail cheque payable to "McGill University" to Backpack to Briefcase, M artlet House, 1430 Peel Street, Montreal. QC, H3A 3T3; cash acceptable if exact change is hand delivered).