The McGill Tribune Vol. 26 Issue 3

Published by th e Students'Society o f McGill University

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Volum e 26 Issue 3 • S eptem ber 1 9 ,2 0 0 6

R e lig io u s ta lk s d is a p p o in t C o n fe r e n c e b y

p r o b le m

p la g u e d s

Jo sh Stark

F e r r is B u e l l e r d i d it, w h y c a n ' t w e ?

S la c k e r s y n d r o m e

a t M c G ill has asked fo r his n a m e a n d m a jo r to re m a in a n o n y m o u s ), s u g g e s t­ in g th a t g re a te r s o c ie ty d o e s n o t fo s te r e th ic a l b e h a v io u r, m a k in g c h e a tin g a n e ce s sity fo r su rvival in th e N o rth A m e ric a n e c o n o m ic clim a te . "N o o n e cares h o w y o u d o it, ju s t th a t y o u d o it w e ll. If g e t­ tin g an e x te n s io n is th e w a y to g e t th e b e st grade , th e n y o u k n o w w h a t, so be it. I'm n o t sa ying it is s o m e th in g I d o . . . b u t if I n e e d e d to , I guess, I w o u ld n 't b e a g a in st it o r a n yth in g ."

S o m e s tu d e n ts e v e n o ffe r a d v ic e fro m th e ir p e rso n a l m e d ic a l n o te successes. "D o n 't e a t th e e v e n in g a n d m o rn in g b e fo re y o u g o in to th e clinic," ad vises a U i H is to ry s tu d e n t. “ Use th e w o rd s 'v o m it' a n d 'na use a ,'a n d sp e a k as little as p o ssible. T h e less w o rd s y o u use, th e m o re b e lie v a b le y o u are,"she c o n tin u e s a n d la u g h s."S ick p e o p le d o n 't w a n t to speak, th e y w a n t to sleep!"

E lizabeth Perle

M o s t s tu d e n ts w o u ld n ’t m in d ta k in g a d a y o ff fro m sc h o o l, à la Ferris B ueller, b u t b e a tin g th e syste m in u n iv e rs ity re q u ire s m o re c o m p le x ta c tic s th a n th o s e u sed b y th e q u in tis s e n tia l h ig h s c h o o l slacker. For s o m e u n d e rg ra d u a te s , a m e d ic a l n o te is a c a d e m ic p a y d irt; a d e v ic e th ro u g h w h ic h th e y score e x te n s io n s o n - o r e v e n e x e m p tio n s fro m - c o m p le tin g a s sig n m e n ts , exa m s a n d o th e r aca­ d e m ic re sp o n sib ilitie s . A s u rp ris in g ly h ig h n u m b e r o f s tu d e n ts a t M cG ill a d m it o p e n ly to a b u s in g th is system to th e ir o w n b e n e fit, s h ru g g in g o ff th ë id e a th a t it c o u ld b e a t th e e x p e n se o f tru ly ill s tu d e n ts , s o m e o f w h o m c la im to fe e l m a rg in a liz e d b y th e g ro w in g g ro u p o f "fa k e rs "'clo g g in g u p th e clinics.

H ardy, har, har...

A cheating culture

"T h e system is all a b o u t g ra d e a n d n u m b e r va lu es - a n d th a t d o e s n o t s tric tly a p p ly to un iversity," asserts a U2 A rts s tu d e n t (w h o

O th e r stu d e n ts, h o w e ve r, w o rry a b o u t th e level o f s o b rie ty w ith

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M c G ill R e d & M

Organizers had high hopes for last week's World Reli­ gions conference, which aimed to combat the increasing­ ly negative perceptions surrounding religions. However, the event fell far short of expectations according to most attendees.

The event was organized by McGill Professor Arvind Sharman, and brought together speakers of all faiths to discuss the role of religion in today's world and to pro­ mote the adoption of a United Nations-style Universal Declaration of Human Rights by the world's religions.

Dr. Anis Malik Thoha, an assistant professor from the International Islamic University of Malaysia, agreed in his speech Wednesday that different religions must commu­ nicate with each other, but added that he did not see this happening effectively in the near future. He later spoke about the low turnout to the event.

"Unfortunately, the organizer didn't organize the pro­ gram properly.... so not enough people showed up,” said Thoha. "When I was in Japan, in Tokyo at a similar event, there [was] a larger number of people, so we [had] more interaction.”

Less than eight people attended Dr.Thoha's session, which was given in a room built for over 100.

Dr. Seyyed Hossein Nasr, an Islamic studies scholar, also spoke to a sparse audience.

"Considering how famous a scholar he is, it was fairly poorly attended," said Heather Empey, a fourth year PhD student at the McGiil Institute of Islamic Studies. "It was maybe a quarter full."

Empey added that she thought the conference orga­ nizers aimed too high with their goals.

"I think that the objective was too lofty and too com­ prehensive,"she said. "An intelligent public could handle a more in-depth talk on religion. It was good intentioned, but what was the point? It would be better to have a more honest, more real conversation about these things."

Empey said that she found the conference was preaching to the converted, as the people who were will­ ing to sit down in dialogue with other religions are not the people who needed to go to a conference to be encour­ aged to do so.

Professor Arvind Sharman, chair of the organizing committee for the conference, said that although there were problems, many of them were out of his control particularly the low attendance.

"This is something I naturally regret; that there were

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C IT Y

R a lly m a r k s I n t e r n a t i o n a l D a r fu r D a y M o n tr e a l

p a r tic ip a te s

Fariduddin Rifai Montreal's rally for International Darfur Day brought attention to the inaction of the inter­ national community and common misconcep­ tions about the controversy and violence in the region on Sunday.

Held on the future site of Concordia Uni­ versity's John Molson School of Business Build­ ing, hundreds of Montrealers partook in the rally, pressing for what organizers called "effec­ tive [United Nations] intervention" in the warravaged region of western Sudan.

“What really strikes us is that the situation in Darfur was going on right around the same time with the anniversary of Rwanda and we were asking ourselves'why did we let that hap­ pen?"'said Gordon Nelson, U2 Political Science.

"Now the same thing is happening in Darfur."

The rally expressed worries over a possible dramatic escalation of the conflict if the UN does not deploy peacekeepers to Darfur.

"We need to put pressure for the UN to intervene in Sudan," said rally organizer Tara Tavendar. "Without new peacekeepers, no one would be able to protect the civilians in Darfur."

The 7,000 African Union peacekeepers that are currently stationed in Darfur are ex­ pected to leave the region once their mandate has expired on September 30.

The UN Security Council has assumed the role of peacekeeper and signed a resolution on Aug. 31,2006, to send a force of 20,000 blue hel­ mets to the region.

The Sudanese government in Khartoum

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w o r ld - w id e

has since refused entry for the international force on grounds that it violates their sover­ eignty.

The Rally for Darfur is one of several other similar events held in other major cities coincid­ ing with what organizers call Darfur Day. "The idea is to gather as many people from all kind of backgrounds to tell the people in Darfur that we are in solidarity with them," said Anne Sainte-Marie of Amnesty International.

Speakers urged action from the Canadian government and people as well.

"As students, we should demand that the Canadian government do something to end the atrocities in Darfur," said Emily Bennett of McGill Stand Canada.

She went on to remind the crowd that "we already have the capacity here in Canada, we have the ability, what we need is the will to lead."

Fighting between the Sudanese govern­ ment's proxy militia and rebels has continued despite the Darfur Peace Agreement signed be­ tween the two parties in May 2006.

Estimates of direct and indirect casualties from the conflict that began in February 2003 ranged from 300,000 to as many as 400,000 people with as many as 2.5 million people inter­ nally displaced.

Organizers stress that if Darfur can be left unnoticed as Rwanda was a decade ago, we still lack awareness.

"Sometimes Darfur just disappears from the news and people just forget about the.situ-

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o n s tr a tio n s

c a llin g

ation there," said Sainte-Marie. "Once we find out that half a million have died, then we'll ask why we didn't know much sooner about the conflict."

In response to the world-wide demonstra­ tions, Khartoum says that the protesters have misunderstood the situation in Darfur. They argue that the reportage of the conflict has been one sided and is "unfortunately moved by political agendas."

According to McGill professor Khalid Medani, focusing on the conflict in Darfur as simply genocide can obscure the real problems in the region.

Invited to speak at the Rally for Darfur, Pro­ fessor Medani told the Tribune that the fighting is part of a wider political and economic prob­ lem.

"It's not to say that it's less bad. But if you just tell people it's genocide they will focus less on the government and the comprehensive problem and focus very specifically in trying to call one group victims and them the other groups killers.That's unfair to the people of Dar­ fur."

He went on to explain the problems with this conception.

"All Darfurians, both from the Africanized and Arabized tribes, demand the Sudanese government in Khartoum open up the politi­ cal system, give them more representation and more economic services."

When violence escalated in February 2003, Khartoum was negotiating a deal with the

fo r a c tio n

Southern Sudanese, who demanded greater political autonomy and control over their eco­ nomic resources, a concession they did not grant to the Darfurians.

"This is why the conflict in Darfur is differ­ ent from genocide," said Medani. "The conflict is not one where one community wants to, in whole or in part, exterminate another, but it is a problem where a central government is using a proxy militia to pacify a region for their own interest."

A report by the Human Rights Watch men­ tions how the division between "Africans" and "Arabs" in the region has "failed to capture the ethnically diverse society of Darfur and the nuanced relationships among ethnic groups."

Speaking to the crowd at the rally last Sun­ day, Medani reminded the audience that the majority of Sudanese are opposed to the regime in Khartoum and that the crisis in Darfur is part of a wider problem of political disenfranchise­ ment and excessive economic centralization.

The effort of finding a solution is made more difficult when countries like Russia and es­ pecially China (which holds 75 per cent owner­ ship over the oil in Sudan) threaten to veto any resolutions for direct UN intervention in Darfur.

Medani says that the conflict thus broach­ es another issue, the absence of democracy in the UN, which hampers its ability to mobilize and act as they should in violent crises such as in Sudan. ■

C IT Y

P e d e s t r ia n s t a k e o v e r c ity 's d o w n t o w n C a r fr e e

d a y

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S o n y a B ell

If your back-to-school shopping included a new pair of sneakers, Fri­ day, Sept. 22 is the day to put them to use. For the fourth straight year, the city of Montreal will be participating in International Car Free Day, known locally as “ En Ville, Sans M a V o itu re !" o r "In Town, Without My Car!" by trans­ forming its downtown core into a pedestrian paradise.

"It's becoming a tradition," said Melanie Nadeau of Agence Métro­ politaine de Transport. "The first year, we had complaints from some down­ town businesses, but now we're get­ ting more support. People know it's coming back year after year."

Nadeau was optimistic about the effect of Montreal's event among those staged simultaneously in 1,500 cities and towns across Canada and the rest of the world.

"Its large and centralized loca­ tion makes a real impact,"she said.

Montreal's car-free perimeter, ranging from De Maisonneuve Blvd in the north to Rene-Levesque Blvd. in the south and from McGill College in the west to St. Urbain in the east, is the largest in North America.

The goal of the annual event is to educate citizens about the negative impact of cars on quality of life and on the environment. But the onus to move to a more sustainable means of transportation does not fall solely on the traveller. Québec Transport Minis­ ter Michel Després wants the day to "promote a joint process of reflection

w a lk e r s

t h e

concerning the behavioural changes needed to improve urban transporta­ tion." "'In Town, Without My Carl' gives everyone a wonderful opportunity to think about the environmental impacts related to car use, the impor­

r ig h t o f w a y tance of making responsible choices in terms of sustainable development and more specifically, what we can do to reduce greenhouse gas emissions," said Claude Trudel, chairman of the Montreal Transit Corporation's Board of Directors. "In this context, the STM

is convinced that the use of public transit is undoubtedly an excellent way of contributing to collective ef­ forts in this area."

This year, "In Town, Without My Car!"will expand and diversify in terms of themes and activities. The down­

town perimeter will be divided into three districts: Environment, Health and Sports and Active and Public Transportation. Corresponding ac­ tivities, such as a'children's ecological and education rally, salsa lessons and an acoustic concert by Les Respect­ ables will be held free of charge.

In past years, pedestrians have enjoyed strolling down a traffic-free Ste-Catherine, but even this will be improved upon in 2006. A section of the street between McGill College and Phillip's Square will be laid with grass to give Montrealers the unique opportunity of enjoying a park in the middle of a downtown road.

Greening McGill and the McGill Environmental Students' Society will expand the city's green perimeter by staging their own set of events on lower campus in the name of Car Free Day and Envirofest, respectively.

Encouraged by the Senate Commit­ tee on the Environment, the McGill administration approved the trans­ formation of lower campus roads into pedestrian and cycling paths for the day. Lower campus will host a variety of information tables, recreational space, arts and crafts and food and drink stands.

Participants are encouraged to bring bicycles for travel or repair, hockey sticks for organized games of street hockey and mugs for drinks, but Saima Sidik of Greening McGill says that the event is flexible.

"Bring anything you want. The goal is to make it fun and entertain­ ing." ■

19.09.06 • The McGill Tribune • 3

@ MAC

N e w lib r a r y s l o w l y r e v e a l in g i t s e l f L ib r a r y

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o v in g

V incci Tsui Students are finally beginning to see some results of the summer's renovations on the Macdonald Cam­ pus Library.

Only the upper level of the li­ brary, which houses the print jour­ nal collection, the photocopiers and some computers, was made available to students after being closed since May 1. The remainder of the library will be available by the first week of October and a grand opening is later in October as a part of homecoming celebrations.

However, the opening is about four weeks late according to Head Li­ brarian Erica Burnham.

"The thing we are really waiting for," she said, "is the completion of the link [between the library and the main building on campus] because that's going to be how everyone will get to the library and we can't really open the library until the link is fin­ ished."

After the completion of the link, the library materials as well as instruc­ tional courses will be moved into the new space.

Burnham emphasized that the new library will have more group study space as well as a greater focus on technology.

o u t o f t e m

p o r a r y

"When the library is finished, there will be a total of 25 comput­ ers. We have tables with electricity and data jacks in them, so it will be a better place in terms of working with print materials and the computer at the same time. In general, we hope that it will be more comfortable for people to sit and read, and we will

h o m

e

"There is some confusion, but we're trying to get the professors to understand what materials are avail­ able," Burnham said. "It's certainly an inconvenience, but one that couldn't really be avoided."

The feedback on the new library has been mixed and students have many suggestions for what will be

"Th e re is som e confusion, b u t w e're try in g to get the professors to understand w h a t materials are available."

— Erica B u rn h a m , Head Librarian also have some quiet study spaces."

Prior to the partial opening, a temporary setup was made in the faculty lounge. At the beginning of the summer, all of the books and journals— 6,500 boxes in total— were packed up and made inaccessible, but as the library purchased new books and had materials returned to them, they were able to circulate a limited amount of materials to the gradu­ ate students and staff who were still on campus. Additional books were made available via inter-library loans.

Undergraduates, on the other hand, were less affected since the clo­ sure happened after final exams and courses have yet to kick into full gear for this semester.

made available on the main floor of the library.

"It's less depressing," said Kath­ leen Shaw, U3 Dietetics. "I don't know what the other floor is going to look like, but I don't like the open tables, I liked the individual carrels they had before and I hope they'll have them."

Anik Girard, U1 Bioresource En­ gineering, had not seen the library pre-renovations, but liked the light­ ing and ambiance that this library provides.

"For now it's nice, but I hope they'll have more public computers, because most of the ones here seem to only access the library catalogue."

The library will be officially opened on October 21. ■

VINCCI TSUI

Studying is just that much more fun when there's light.

O r g a n iz a tio n a l p r o b le m s h u r t e v e n t s C o n fe r e n c e

p la n n e r c la im s

Continued from cover not enough people," he said, "but it is something over which we have very little control - people vote with their feet."

Amy Wanounou, a Masters student from York University in Toronto, was also critical of the event.

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"I'm a little disappointed," she said. "I thought it would be more of a critical, academic look at the real issues that need to be discussed, as opposed to what I found, which was a lot of great rhetoric about how we all need to interface and dialogue" Ms. Wanounou, who is studying female suicide bombers,

c o n tr o

was hoping to find information that might help in her own stud­ ies. However, what she found was not so useful.

Echoing Dr. Thoha's sentiments, Wanounou said that the event suffered from poor organization.

"A lot of people haven't even shown up for their talks which was a little disappointing since they were the ones that were planning on talking about the specific studies they've done,"Wanounou said.

Sharman regretted that some speakers did,not show.up, but explained that the problem was unavoidable with such strin­ gent border security and the inevitable complexity of travel.

"A person coming from Egypt," he said, "flew to America to visit his daughter first, and then came to Canada. But the US au­ thorities would not let him leave [because of] some problem with him landing in USA and not going straight to Canada."

Sharman took issue with Wanounou's assertion that the conference lacked critical academic analysis.

"It was not meant to be a purely academic conference. It had a strong academic component, but it was not meant to be a purely academic conference,"Sharman said. “Anyone who heard [a number of the speakers] would realize that it had high intel­ lectual content. I would disagree ... that there was no academic treatment of the issues. This was not the sole concern of the conference. But that was by design, and not by accident."

He went on to explain that the conference did accomplish more than rhetoric.

"The reason why we proposed the draft of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights was to provide a basis for these religions to come and work together," Sharman said. "The draft is a concrete thing, something to work on -. how can that be denied?"

Sharman was hopeful that similar conferences could be or­ ganized in the future.

"If we don't have this very conference again, we are sure to have a conference which is very close to it... the Parliament of World Religions, which will meet in 2009."

— a d d itio n a l re p o rtin g b y K ayvon A fs h a ri

Not everyone shows up to church on Sunday.

4 • News • 19.09.06

The McGill Tribune

CAMPUS

IM A G E S

A c tiv itie s n ig h t r e a c h e s n e w h e ig h ts C lu b s

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Representatives of the Gamer's Guild, also on the fourth floor, were more enthusiastic.

'Look at all these names we have," said Andrew Bernstein, keyholder of the Gamers Guild, pointing to his list. 'Plus, all the clubs in this lounge are intellectual clubs. These [board] games are intellectual games.”

Although the smaller clubs didn't mind the change, the larger clubs were less at ease.

Dan Radmanovic, president of the Interna­ tional Relations Students'Association of McGill

lo c a tio n

U nive rsity, w as d is a p p o in te d w ith th e d e cisio n .

"SSMU p u t th e p re s tig io u s c lu b s u p here," he said. "L o o k w h o else is u p here. There's b e e n n o tra ffic . Last ye ar w e w e re c lu b o f th e year. W e ha d 550 p e o p le sign u p [a t A c tiv itie s N ig h t] a n d th is ye a r w e 're ju s t u n d e r 200."

R a d m a n o v ic stressed th a t A c tiv itie s N ig h t is im p o r ta n tfo r re c ru itin g s tu d e n ts ra th e r th a n h a v in g a q u ie t a tm o s p h e re to fu lly e x p la in th e m a n d a te o f his clu b .

"P e o p le have b e e n a skin g us 'W h y a re n 't y o u d o w n s ta irs ? '! d o n 't k n o w ,"h e said.

T h e M cG ill D e b a tin g U n io n c ite d s im ila r co n ce rn s , a n d n o te d d ra m a tic a lly fe w e r s ig n ­ up s th a n in p re v io u s years.

C e rta in c lu b s n o te d a d v a n ta g e s to b e in g o n th e fo u rth flo o r, n a m e ly g ro u p s w h o c u r­ re n tly o c c u p y o ffic e s o n th e to p level o f S ha t­ ner.

M att. C ampbell

A d d in g th e S h a tn e r b u ild in g 's fo u rth flo o r to last w ee k's A c tiv itie s N ig h t re ce iv e d m ix e d re vie w s fro m c lu b s a n d services. A c c o rd in g to S tu d e n ts ' S o c ie ty V ice -P re sid e n t C lu b s a n d S ervices Floh H erra-V ega, th e d e c is io n to o p e n th e to p flo o r w a s m a d e b e ca u se th is ye ar SSMU re c o g n iz e d m o re c lu b s th a n e v e r before.

To h e lp d ra w tra ffic , la rg e , p o p u la r c lu b s w e re a ssig n e d to th e to p flo o r. H ow e ve r, m a n y o f th o s e c lu b s w e re u n h a p p y w ith b e in g p la c e d in th e o u t-o f-th e -w a y clu b s lo u n g e .

S abrina M a w a n i, U2 IDS a n d B io m e d ic a l S ciences o f H a b ita t fo r H u m a n ity w as in itia lly w o rrie d .

"A lo t o f p e o p le d o n 't use th e fo u rth floor," she said. "A lth o u g h , I th o u g h t it w o u ld b e a lo t w orse."

H a b ita t w a s n 't p a rtic u la rly s u ffe rin g fro m re d u c e d tra ffic . “It's m o re sp a cio u s [u p here], a n d less c ro w d e d . You g e t a c h a n c e to te ll m o re p e o p le as o p p o s e d to sh o u tin g ."

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Pascale Dequen of le Centre pour les Étu­ diants Francophones pointed out the benefits.

"It's less crowded, less loud and there's less traffic," she said. "Also, it's an advantage to be right in front of our office."

"I think it would be better if we were [also] handing out pamphlets downstairs," she added.

Meg Atkinson, U2 Anthropology, who was representing the McGill Global AIDS Coalition, summarized the general feeling.

'I was kind of surprised when I found out [our table would be here]. There's not as much traffic, but it's not detrimental. I do have mixed feelings but I'm happy to go with the flow." ■

JAMESGOTOWIEC

Two children finish colouring posters to place at the memorial for the victims of Wednesday's shooting at Dawson College. Classes resume at the CEGEP today.

CORRECTION: In last week's S SM U H a n d b o o k story, Je nna W akani's nam e w as spelled incorrectly. T h e T rib u n e apologizes for th e error.

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T o be held on CAMPAGNE ANNUELLE DE RECRUTEMENT UNIVERSITAIRE - AUTOMNE 20 06 Une carrière à la mesure de vos ambitions !

Vous te rm in e z vos é tu d e s u n ive rsita ire s d ’iei a o û t 2007 ? Vous êtes titu la ire d 'u n d ip lô m e d 'é tu d e s u n ive rsita ire s e t vo us é tu d ie z to u jo u rs à te m p s p le in ? Vous ch e rc h e z u n e m p lo i s tim u la n t en lien avec v o tre d o m a in e d 'é tu d e s e t vo u s v o u le z releve r des d é fis ?

Ne m a n q u e z pas la c a m p a g n e d e re c ru te m e n t u n iv e rs ita ire d e la fo n c tio n p u b liq u e q u é b é co ise q u i se d é ro u le d u 18 s e p te m b re au 13 o c to b re 2006.

En p lu s d 'o ffrir des e m p lo is intéressants, le g o u v e rn e m e n t d u Q u é b e c p ro p o s e des c o n d itio n s d e tra va il c o n c u rre n tie lle s , un a m é n a g e m e n t s o u p le d u te m p s d e tra v a il e t des a c tiv ité s d e fo rm a tio n . Un e m p lo i dans la fo n c tio n p u b liq u e , c'est aussi la p o s s ib ilité d e tra v a ille r dans d iffé re n ts secteurs, dans d iffé re n ts m in is tè re s e t o rg a n is m e s o u m ê m e dans d iffé re n te s ré g io n s d u Q u é b e c !

Pour p lus d e d é ta ils e t p o u r c o n n a ître les dates des visites dans v o tre u n iv e rs ité , c o n s u lte z le site In te rn e t

[www.recrutementquebec.gouv.qc.ca] ou renseignez-vous a uprès d u service de p la c e m e n t d e v o tre é ta b lis s e m e n t.

O n vo u s a tte n d ... à b ie n tô t !

Centre de servicespartagés Q u éb ec a n

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5 th

A n d can fo r

A G EN D A ITEM S. In accordance with the constitutional amendment o f Winter 2006, the SSMU shall call a General Assembly for the 5th week o f each semester.

Agenda items must be submitted at least 14 days in advance, either directly by students or by reference from the SSMU Legislative Council. Questions or agenda items should be submitted to speaker@ssmu.mcgill.ca by midnight of Thursday September 21ss. According to the SSMU Constitution, a 2 2 , a general assembly may propose motions on a l l matters except changes to the SSMU Constitution, membership fees or financial matters, and the composition o f the SSMU staff.

The SSMU Speaker o f Council shall determine the order o f the agenda items.

19.09.06 • News • 5

www.mcgilltribune.com

CAM PUS

CAM PUS

4 F lo o r s p o s t p o n e d

M c G ill u n v e i l s

P a r ty

M e d ic a l C e n tr e

g e ts

fa c e lift t o

K a t e S p ir g e n

T h e re c e n t e v e n ts a t D a w s o n C o lle g e ca u se d th e S tu d e n ts ' S o­ c ie ty t o re s c h e d u le th e tra d itio n a l S e p te m b e r 4 F loo rs p a rty in S h a tn e r last w e e k. H o w e ve r, a fte r lo w a tte n ­ d a n c e in p re v io u s years, m a n y are w o n d e rin g if 4 F lo o rs ca n e v e r b e re ­ v iv e d to its p re v io u s g lo ry days.

T h e c a n c e lla tio n w as "o u t o f re s p e c t fo r th o s e w h o are p e rs o n ­ a lly a ffe c te d b y th is tra g ic event," ac­ c o rd in g to th e SSMU w e b s ite , w h ic h w e n t o n to e n c o u ra g e a n y o n e a f­ fe c te d b y th e s h o o tin g s t o b e w ith frie n d s a n d fa m ily .

The event has been tentatively rescheduled for Sept. 29. "I don't want to push it back any farther than this month," said SSMU Vicepresident Communications and Events Gill Prendergast.

Last year, th e in fa m o u s 4F lo o rs p a rty w a s re v a m p e d a n d n a m e d "M é n a g e à Trois," w ith o n ly th re e flo o rs a n d a re d -lig h t d is tric t th e m e , b u t th e e v e n t d id n 't q u ite liv e u p to its fo rm e r g lo ry . H o w e ve r, th o s e w h o d id a tte n d e n jo y e d th e m s e lv e s .

"I m ig h t g o th is year," said M ik e 1G a rfin k le , U2 C h e m istry. "I lik e d it a lo t last year." ' T h is year's e v e n t has re tu rn e d to th e o rig in a l n a m e , b u t has a n e w th e m e .

r e g a in

"Last ye a r n o o n e k n e w w h a t it was," said P ren d e rg a st. "W e w e n t b a ck t o th e n a m e b e ca u se it's fa ­ m ous."

A lth o u g h th e p a rty has b e e n b ra n d e d in th e p a st as a fre s h m a n e v e n t, th is year's o rg a n iz e rs are h o p ­ in g to a ttra c t a m o re d iv e rs e p o p u la ­ tio n . D rin k specials are a v a ila b le w ith Frosh sh irts o r m u g s fro m a n y Frosh, fro m a n y year.

"W e w a n t to g e t b a c k to th e o ld sc h o o l w a y o f d o in g th in g s ," P re n d ­ e rg a s t said. "W e're n o t try in g to d o a n y th in g s u p e r fa n c y b e ca u se it's n o t s u p e r fa n cy. It ran w e ll w h e n it w a s ju s t a b o u t b e in g g ross a n d [h a v in g ] c h e a p beer."

T h e th e m e is "T a gge d," w h ic h a llu d e s t o th e g ra ffiti p a rty th a t w ill sp re a d th ro u g h th e b u ild in g o n Fri­ day.

A tte n d e e s are e n c o u ra g e d to w e a r w h ite T -sh irts o r u n d e rs h irts , o r p ic k u p a fre e SSMU Frosh T -s h irt a t th e d o o r. T h e y w ill th e n b e a b le to use h ig h lig h te rs th a t s h o w u p U nd er u ltra v io le t lig h t t o d ra w o n o th e rs th ro u g h o u t th e n ig h t. T h e p e rso n w ith th e m o s t'ta g s 'a t th e e n d o f th e p a rty w ill w in a prize.

H o w e ve r, th e UV lig h ts w ill n o t b e in e v e ry ro o m a n d p a rty -g o e rs m u s t tra c k d o w n a lig h t b e fo re th e y ca n see w h a t has b e e n w ritte n o n

s ta tu s th e ir sh irt.

B u t w ill th is year's e v e n t b e a n y m o re o f a success th a n last year?

"Last ye a r w e h a d ju s t p u t SSMU Frosh o n a n d I th in k th a t e v e ry o n e w a s ju s t tire d . T his ye a r it's later, so h o p e fu lly p e o p le w ill b e re a d y to party," P re n d e rg a st said.

P re n d e rg a st also trie d to a d ­ v e rtis e th e e v e n t w id e ly , u tiliz in g In te rn e t se n sa tio n s like YouTube a n d F a c e b o o k b y p o s tin g a v id e o m a d e b y T V M cG ill.

B u t m a n y M cG ill s tu d e n ts are still u n a w a re th a t th e e v e n t exists.

"I've n e v e r h e a rd o f it, so I p ro b ­ a b ly w o n 't go," said M ic h e lle Rosem a n , U2 P sycho lo gy.

T h e p o te n tia l fo r fre e a lc o h o l a n d prizes m a y-a lso d ra w o u t m o re p e o p le .

"W e're try in g to g e t flo o r fe l­ lo w s to b rin g d o w n th e ir e n tire floor," P re n d e rg a st said. "If th e y d o , th e y 'll g e t a b o ttle o f liq u o r th a t w e 'v e g o t­ te n as p ro m o tio n s b e ca u se w e 'v e b o u g h t so m u ch ." T h e re are 12 b o t­ tle s a v a ila b le tp b e w o n .

T h e re is a PSP to b e g iv e n a w a y as w e ll to th e p e rs o n w ith th e m o s t e n th u s ia s m . T h e c o m p e titio n m a y in v o lv e a d a n c e -o ff.

"It's h a rd to ju d g e th is k in d o f th in g , b u t w h o e v e r is h a v in g th e m o s t fu n w ins," P re n d e rg a st said. ■

S im

u la tio n

m u c h

c e n tr e

n e e d e d

K a y v o n A fshari

T h e tra n s itio n fro m m e d ic a l te x tb o o k s to a c lin ic a l s e ttin g o fte n leads t o m istake s b y w e ll-m e a n ­ in g b u t in e x p e rie n c e d m e d ic a l s tu ­ d e n ts. T o try to h e lp th e m learn in a risk-free s e ttin g , M cG ill has o p e n e d a M e d ic a l S im u la tio n C e n tre to o ffe r h a n d s -o n tra in in g . S itu ­ a te d in th e b a s e m e n t o f th e G al­ eries d u Parc, th e c e n tre is th e larg est, m ost c o m p re h e n s iv e m e d ic a l skills s im u la tio n and le a rn in g fa c ility in C anada.

It c o m b in e s tra in in g te c h n iq u e s fro m h ig h -ris k p ro fe ss io n s like a v ia tio n a n d e m e rg e n c y re spo nse w ith th e la te st m e d ic a l s im u la tio n te c h n o lo g ie s .

"This w as an in itia tiv e fro m a g ro u p o f surgeons," said Lind a C re lin sten, m a n a g e r o f th e m e d ic a l s im u la ­ tio n ce n tre . "T h e id e a w as ju s t to d o s u rg e ry a n d th e n p e o p le fo u n d th a t a fte r s o m e discu ssio n , th a t it w o u ld b e b e s t to tr y to in c o rp o ra te a lo t o f o th e r skills th a t a lo t o f c lin icia n s need."

o ffe r s

p r a c tic e T h e W o rld H e a lth O rg a n iz a tio n e s tim a te s th a t o n e in e v e ry 10 h o s p i­ ta l p a tie n ts suffers fro m m e d ic a l m is­ takes le a d in g to se rious a n d s o m e ­ tim e s fa ta l c o n se q u e n ce s.

T h e fo c u s o f th e s im u la tio n ce n ­ tre m o v e d a w a y fro m te c h n ic a l skills a n d to w a rd s d e v e lo p in g a m u ltid is c i­ p lin a ry c e n te r fo r all h e a lth care p ro ­ fessions, a c c o rd in g to C re lin s te n .T h e c e n tre w ill b e used b y M cG ill s tu d e n ts in m e d ic in e , n u rsin g , o c c u p a tio n a l th e ra p y a n d p h y s io th e ra p y , as w e ll as th o s e d o in g th e ir re sidencies.

T h e fu n d in g fo r th e c e n tre ca m e fro m th e F aculty o f M e d ic in e , th e M in ­ istry o f E d u c a tio n a n d fro m d o n o rs.

A c c o rd in g to C re lin s te n , th e use o f th e c e n tre is c u rre n tly o n ly o ffe re d to classes.

"It's class-based. A n u rs in g class has b e e n h e re th re e tim e s , w h ic h has b e e n p la n n e d sin ce A p ril. T h e in s tru c ­ to rs k n o w e x a c tly w h a t th e y w a n t th e m to do , so p e o p le h a ve to have o b je c tiv e s fo r th e ir co urse. W e h o p e to have so m e tim e fo r s tu d e n ts to p ra ctice , b u t th a t h a sn 't b e e n set u p as o f ye t,"C re lin ste n said. ■

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it's inthebag!

6 • News • 19.09.06

The McGill Tribune

CAM PUS BUZZ W h a t d o y o u t h i n k o f W e b C T V is ta ?

U n iv e rs ity o f O tta w a

"For the most part it works and it's a convenient way to get your homework done."

— Tania Zhang, Uo Science

Attend law school in Canada and the United States

"I have no problems whatsoever. It's always worked for me. A lot of other people are complaining, but I've never had problems."

— Matt Pokinko, Uo Psychology "I've only ever used Vista, as a TA. I like it - it's good for students exchanging notes. Besides, a lot of students are on the Internet anyway.”

— Chelsea Honeyman, Graduate student English Literature "It's fine. I'm used to the old one where the courses are divided by semester.

It's a little more pleasing and about as fast. It's also nice to have tabs."

— Kristin Maich, Ü2 Political Science and English

Earn two degrees:

"I have a Mac, so it doesn't work all the time. And I'm kind of scared that the Internet is going to go down."

— Marina Fridman, Uo Science

• a J D f r o m M ic h ig a n S ta te U n iv e r s ity C o lle g e o f L aw *; O R

• a n LL B fr o m t h e U n iv e r s ity o f O tta w a ; A N D

• a JD fr o m A m e r ic a n U n iv e r s ity W a s h in g to n C o lle g e o f L aw .

"WebCT Vista is trying to be cool, when it's really not. The first version was easier to use, and I knew where everything was. Also, last year it was confus­ ing. Some classes used Vista, while others used WebCT original and others used neither."

— Sarah Profit, U2 Political Science

*Pay Canadian tuition for all four years when attending Michigan State University College of Law.

"It doesn't really phase me. Vista is pretty self-explanatory. It's not an incon­ venience for me."

— Lindsay Sanders, U2 Politial Science

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"I'm indifferent. Although, I had trouble logging in. All but one of my courses use it. It's taking a long time to get science recordings online. I'm not sure if that's because of Vista or something else."

— Anna Trowbridge, U2 Arts and Sciences

u O tta w a

"I prefer the old one. The new version has bugs in it. There are crazy win­ dows which open and crash my computer. The sign-in function is hiding too. It's not that obvious.They should make it stand out."

— Flyun Soo Kin, U3 History

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19.09.06 • News • 9

w w w.m cgilltribune.com

IM A G E S

N e w s

B r ie fs

SSMU used book sale still needs work In the seemingly never-ending search for cheaper textbooks, the Students' Society book sale may provide an alternative to the budget-breaking prices at the bookstore.

Students can put books up for sale at their own price and keep the profit for themselves, paying a commission of one dollar to SSMU to pay for advertis­ ing costs. If the book doesn't sell, it is returned with no charge. Any unclaimed books are donated to international charities.

To purchase books, students first search the SSMU website to check for availability, condition and price. They can then find the book at the volunteerrun sale held at Gert's.

"The point here is not to make money,” said book sale coordinator Dave Shiroky."It's a service, not a fundraiser."

Although the SSMU book sales have been taking place for several years, they have yet to gain popularity among students.

"I didn't know about the SSMU book sales," said Christina Krygier, U1 Bio­ chemistry,"! am just familiar with the McGill Classifieds, which is where I got the majority of my books."

Most of the customers came after seeing advertisements in the McGill Dally and Facebook, but many have heard about it through word of mouth.

SSMU Vice President Clubs and Services Floh Herra-Vega hopes to develop the sale further in the coming months and years.

"We're looking for new ways to expand and use new strategies in order to become more available to students as well as adapt services to what the student wants," she said.

—Isis Ortiz Montreal experiencing bus shortages

U

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■

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sp eed

In response to increasing violence in one of Colombia's most violent cities, wives and girlfriends of gang members have called a sex ban, called the "strike of crossed legs". The move is backed by the mayor of Pereira and is aiming to disarm the gang members. • A shoplifter was caught in Germany as he returned to the clothing store where he had committed the crime, sporting the very same clothes that he had stolen. He returned to the scene of the crime because he had stolen a pair of shoes in two different sizes and wanted to fix his mistake. "It seems he may not have been the brightest of thieves,"said a spokesperson for the Bielefeld police. • Animal rights groups are on the lookout for a suspected cat torturer and killer who recently adopted at least two cats. The man had recently adopted a cat from a local organization and when they contacted the man in question to do a follow-up, he became nasty and told them he was enjoying torturing the cat. • Elephants in West Bengal's state forest de­ partment are to undergo a birth control scheme due to a lack of funds for their upkeep. The department spends nearly $130,000 USD annually on the upkeep of the elephants in its service. • A top judge in the Seychelles Island said that some criminals and lawyers are conspiring to delay court cases so the felons can enjoy Christmas before serving their sentences. Some prisoners in the Indian Ocean islands have been known to bust out for festivals and then return back to their cells.

—Sources: BBC, Yahoo!, Can West News Service, Reuters

T o m o r r o w 's P r o f e s s io n a ls A p p ly T o d a y

A p p ly O n -lin e !

OM SAS

Rush hour commuters have been enduring long lines and delays due to a Société Transport de Montréal bus shortage and are beginning to take their frustration out on drivers. Between Sept. 12 and 13, the bus driver's union passed out 400,000 informational flyers asking commuters not to harass the drivers when over-crowding and delays occur.

The current bus shortage is the result of several years of low funding. STM has been unable to get enough money to replace its aging buses. This situa­ tion is the result of the mechanical problems that occur more frequently with first generation (APS 1) low-floored buses than in other vehicles.

According to the STM's Sept. 12,2006 press release,'The bus transport sys­ tem is operating at more than 99 per cent of its capacity. The Montreal transit corporation recognizes that there is a disruption of service during mornings and afternoons. This is a consequence of the limited availability of our vehicles, where hundreds of hours have to be cut from a system that operates 14,000 hours per day during the week."

"It's been two years and the Quebec government has not come up with a permanent financial plan to fund the transportation system. We want the public to understand that it's not the fault of the drivers when the buses are late," said Stéphane Lachance, vice-president of Montreal's bus drivers union, the Syndicat des Chauffeurs, Opérateurs et Employés des Services Connexes de la STM. Many of the low-floored buses built in 1996 are having mechanical trou­ ble. Long and expensive repairs are putting between 100 and 120 buses out of commission, leaving 100,000 daily commuters without sufficient transporta­ tion.

"I get complaints in the morning, but it's business as usual,"said one driver who refused to give her name.

—Elaine Radman For m ore in fo rm atio n

www.ouac.on.ca/omsas/

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Something blue

Oral sex is great

J. F. Kostuck

J esse C haser

JFKOSTUCK@GMAIL.COM

JESSE.CHASER@GMAIL.COM

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arning: The following column is writ­ ten with a heterosexual audience in mind (which is something I wouldn't normally do), but generally I think the queer community is much more open to the joys of oral sex and doesn't need a talking to on the subject.

W h y has p e rfo rm in g o ra l sex b e c o m e a d e ro g a to ry th in g ? W h y d o th e m e d ia , m u s ic in d u s try a n d p o rn (okay, b a d e x a m p le ) m a ke it o u t to b e all a b o u t p o w e r fo r th e p e rso n re ­ c e iv in g it?

I th in k it's a b o u t p o w e r fo r th e p e rso n g iv in g oral sex. In th a t m o m e n t th e y are c o m ­ p le te ly c o n tro llin g th e ir p a rtn e r's p le a su re — in th a t m o m e n t th e y o w n th e ir p a rtn e r.

Sorry, b u t w h o e v e r th o u g h t "I kn o w , I'll m a ke oral sex se e m d e m e a n in g to give,''is s tu ­ p id . I'm a b ig fa n o f oral sex, a n d w o u ld like to d o n o th in g to d is c o u ra g e th o s e w h o w o u ld like to p e rfo rm it o n m e. M a k in g it se e m d e ­ m e a n in g d o e s ju s t th a t— b o o -u rn s !

For e x a m p le , w h y is "suck it" an in su lt?

A re m e n re ally th a t s tu p id th a t th e y d e c id e d to m a ke it d e g ra d in g fo r w o m e n — o r an yo n e , as th is is o fte n said in a h o m o p h o b ic fa s h ­ io n — to g iv e th e m su ch pleasure. W h y o n E arth w o u ld th e y d o su ch a th in g ?

W h y w o u ld m e n sh y a w a y fro m d o in g s o m e th in g th a t b rin g s th e ir fe m a le p a rtn e rs so m u c h pleasure? Is it be ca u se th e y w o rry a b o u t lo s in g p o w e r in th e re la tio n s h ip o r fe e lin g in fe rio r? A g a in , th is is s tu p id . B e in g so c o m p le te ly in c o n tro l s h o u ld m a ke th e m feel, if a n y th in g , su p e rio r. S a tisfying one's p a rtn e r s h o u ld b e a w in -w in fo r b o th pa rtie s, n o t a b iza rre p o w e r s tru g g le .

W h y has th e re b e e n a d e b a s e m e n t o f o ra l sex in p o p u la r c u ltu re ? is it a h o m o p h o biG re a c tio n to a p ra c tic e th a t is s tro n g ly asso­ c ia te d w ith th e q u e e r c o m m u n ity ? Is it p a rt o f

th e tra d itio n a lis t b a ckla sh a g a in s t fe m in is m ?

Is it s im p ly an u n in te n d e d re s u lt o f w a n tin g to use c le v e r q u ip s like " b lo w m y w h is tle , b itch ? " R egardless o f th e reason, th e . o u tc o m e is a n o -w in s itu a tio n .

S o m e m ig h t a rg u e th a t p e rfo rm in g fe l­ la tio o r c u n n ilin g u s is ju s t p la in d is g u s tin g .

Fair e n o u g h , b u t if y o u th in k a b o u t it, so is sex; all th o s e b o d ily flu id s m in g lin g a n d all th e s w e a t-in d u c in g fric tio n — e w w .

You m a y say, 'b u t Jesse, th a t's n o t in m y m o u th ". T ha t's tru e , b u t h a ve y o u seen s o m e o f th e fo o d w e e a t to d a y ? A e ro so l cheese, g re a s e -la d e n fre e z e -d rie d fa st fo o d h a m ­ b u rg e rs a n d d e e p -frie d e v e ry th in g , a t least e ja c u la te is a ll-n a tu ra l.

In fa c t, I've h e a rd o f several w o m e n w h o fin d th e id e a o f c u n n ilin g u s so d is g u s tin g th a t th e y d o n o t e v e n like h a v in g it p e rfo rm e d o n th e m . A lth o u g h I fin d th is h a rd to b e lie ve , I have h e a rd it fro m several sources. Excuse m e fo r b e in g cy n ica l, b u t I c a n 't h e lp b u t w o n d e r w h e th e r th is is re a lly a n in d ic a to r o f s o m e ­ th in g else.

P erhaps it's a m a n ife s ta tio n o f so cie ty's s u b tle m essages th a t w o m e n s h o u ld feel b a d ly a b o u t th e ir b o d ie s a n d th e ir se xu a lity. It c o u ld also b e th e — ra th e r bizarre, in m y h u m ­ b le o p in io n — p re fe re n c e s o f a fe w w o m e n , o r m a y b e th e ir p a rtn e rs are ju s t so b a d th a t th e y c a m e u p w ith th is lie ra th e r th a n p ro v id in g a little re -e d u c a tio n .

If y o u d o g e n u in e ly fin d o ra l sex d is g u s t­ in g , th a t's fin e (w e ll, m a y b e n o t fo r y o u r p a rt­ ner, b u t th a t's a n o th e r sto ry). I'm n o t sa ying e v e ry o n e has to b e an oral s e x -lo v in g fie n d .

M y p o in t is th a t it s h o u ld n 't b e s o m e th in g th a t m ake s th e g iv e r fe e l d e m e a n e d . It s h o u ld b e s o m e th in g fre e ly e n jo y e d b y e v e ry o n e , n o t a s u b je c t fo r m is o g y n is tic ra p so n g s like 50 C en t's "C a n d y shop." ■

h e b ig fash io n tre n d th is fall is n o t th e skin ny je a n , n o r is it th e sw eater-dress, p e e k-to e p u m p s o r m ilita ry coats. The h o t accessory fo r a u tu m n , as I w as in fo rm e d th is past w e e ke n d , is th e e n g a g e m e n t ring.

Ah, e n g a g e m e n t rings. T he w orld 's sm allest set o f ha ndcuffs, so m e m ig h t say.

S peaking fro m th e p e rsp e ctive o f o n e w h o has lo n g a c ce p te d h e r in e v ita b le spinsterh o o d , it b o g g le s th e m in d as to w h y an yon e still y o u n g e n o u g h to g e t ca rd e d a t a bar . w o u ld c o m m it to s p e n d in g th e rest o f th e ir lives w ith a single, so lita ry sp ecim en.

It be gan , as I b e lieve S hakespeare in ­ te n d e d all tra g e d ie s to, o n in sta n t m essenger.

I w as accoste d b y a h ig h sch o o l acqua in ta nce , o n e w ith w h o m I th a n k fu lly have precious fe w conve rsa tion s. A ssum ing th a t he r send­ in g m e a m essage w as a re sult o f b o re d o m , I b e n e v o le n tly d e c id e d to e n te rta in Suzy's va lia n t a tte m p t a t c o h e re n t b a n te r (all nam es have b e en ch ang ed). A fte r a fe w exchanges, it b e ca m e e v id e n t th a t she w as fa r s tu p id e r th a n I re m e m b e re d h e r to be, a n d I fa r m ore cynical th a n she re m e m b e re d me.

W h e n I b e g a n to feel m y IQ decreasing, I p repa re d to e n d th e co n ve rsa tio n w ith th e c o n v e n ie n tly pla ce d B lock b u tto n . It w as ju s t th e n th a t Suzy m a n a g e d to fu lly c a p tu re m y a tte n tio n w ith a s h o ck in g p ie ce o f in fo rm a ­ tio n . xS u zyE m o H ig hschoo Ix: d id u here a b t Ashley?

B itte ra n d C o n te n t: No, w ha t? xS uzyE m o H ig hschoo Ix: She g o t e n ­ gaged.

B itte ra n d C o n te n t: W ell, d a m n .

D is c o u n tin g m y d e te s ta tio n fo r h a p p y e n d in g s an d ig n o rin g m y a b h o rre n ce fo r af­ fe c tio n , th is ne w s le ft m e w ith a ba d taste in m y m o u th an d a b u rn in g in m y loins.

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N o rm a lly a fte r he aring o f such scandal a Joan C ra w fo rd -ca lib re o u tb u rs t w o u ld ensue, o n e lib e ra lly fu e lle d by hard liq uou r. This tim e how ever, I re m a in e d s e lf-c o n tro lle d and sober. T he reason, yo u ask? As it happens, I had b e en h it w ith id e n tica l ne w s n o t th re e days before.

A n o th e r girl w ith w h o m I had th e d is­ pleasure o f a tte n d in g h ig h schoo l w as p la n ­ n in g o n w a lk in g d o w n th e aisle. H ere w ere tw o passably c o m p e te n t girls, w illin g ly sig n ­ in g th e ir fre e d o m away. I w o u ld a lm o s t u n ­ de rsta n d th e n o tio n if th e se w e re c o m m is ­ sion ed acts, o rg a n ize d o n th e Russian black m arket, b u t th e y w e re n o t. These girls w ere g e ttin g m arrie d fo r "love."

There are m u ltitu d e s o f w o m e n w h o la m e n t th e ir s in g le d o m as th e y w a tc h m o re a ttra c tiv e a n d less in te llig e n t frie n d s g e t m ar­ ried. Sayings such as "alw ays th e b rid esm a id , n e ver th e b rid e " have w o rk e d th e ir w a y in to p o p u la r cu ltu re , so as to fu rth e r stress th e im ­ p o rta n c e o f h a vin g a p a rtn e r w ith w h o m to sh u ffle o ff th is m o rta l coil.

Sure, m a yb e th e s e g irls w ill m a rry y o u n g , d ie o ld an d sp e n d th e tim e in b e tw e e n liv ­ in g o u t a N icholas Sparks novel, b u t m ayb e th e y w o n 't. M a yb e th e y 'll b e g in to lo n g fo r th e ir days as sin g u la r n o u n s an d lo o k u p o n us spinsters w ith envy. W e m a y b e th e ones in m e ta llic seafoam as o p p o s e d to w h ite lace, b u t brid e sm a id s d o n 't g e t in tro u b le fo r sle e p in g w ith tw o th ird s o f th e g ro o m s m e n . b e fo re /d u rin g /a fte rth e rehearsal dinn er.

I c o u ld use th is c o n clu s io n as a place to m ake so m e so rt o f radical social c o m m e n ta ry o n th e in s titu tio n o f m arriage, b u t fo r n o w I'm g o in g to h it th e snooze b u tto n o n m y b io ­ logical clo c k an d g o have so m e p ro m iscu o u s sex. H o p e fu lly w ith som eone's fia ncé . Eat it, Ashley. ■

IN F O R M A T IO N A T IO N

Privacy lost: browsing in the fishbowl society A n dr ew S c h a af ANDREW@ANDREWSCHAAF.COM

o ffe r y o u q u e s tio n s , n o t an sw ers. P rivacy is a c o m p lic a t­ e d issue, w ith m a n y p ro b le m s d w e llin g a t th e c o llis io n o f o u r v a rio u s h u m a n values.

W e fe e l d iffe re n tly a b o u t o u r in fo rm a tio n b e in g in th e h a n d s o f o th e rs d e p e n d in g o n w h o th e y are. In fo rm a tio n in th e h a n d s o f stalkers is c re e p y a n d p o s s ib ly d a n g e ro u s .

In fo rm a tio n in th e h a n d s o f frie n d s is u s e fu l a n d le ts us see c o n n e c tio n s w e m ig h t h a ve m isse d. In fo rm a tio n in th e h a n d s o f o p p re s s iv e g o v e rn m e n ts g e ts g o o d p e o p le k ille d o r to rtu re d . In fo rm a tio n in th e h a n d s o f d e c e n t g o v e rn ­ m e n ts ca n c o n v ic t c rim in a ls . A n d in fo rm a tio n in th e h a n d s o f la rg e c o rp o ra tio n s ca n b rin g g re a t e ffic ie n c ie s . In th e rig h t h a n d s o r th e w ro n g ha nds, d a ta d o e s th in g s .

W h a t m o s t o f us are m is s in g is ju s t h o w m u c h d a ta has b u ilt u p a n d in w h o s e h a n d s it lies.

W ith e v e ry w e b p a g e y o u visit, e v e ry lin k y o u click, a c ry p tic HTTP q u e ry lo g is m a d e b y th e se rve r o n th e o th e r e n d , s to rin g th e fo llo w in g fa cts a b o u t y o u r visit.

IPAddress: T his u n iq u e n u m b e r fo r y o u r c u rre n t in te r­ n e t c o n n e c tio n can b e tra c e d to yo u .

Timestamp: H o w m u c h tim e d o y o u s p e n d re a d in g w h ic h pages? A n d w h y , exa ctly, w e re y o u b ro w s in g Face-

I

book p ro file s u n til 4 3 0 a.m .?

What software you're using: T h e s o ftw a re e q u iv a le n t o f "O ffice r, his ca r w a s a lig h t g re e n 1989 C h e v y C am aro."

Referring page: A W e b site ca n te ll w h ic h w e b p a g e y o u c a m e fro m . In th e case o f se a rc h in g , it ca n see y o u r se arch te rm s .

In d iv id u a lly , th e s e q u e rie s a re n 't to o bad, b u t th a t is n o t h o w th e y are ta k e n . T h e y are ta k e n en masse a n d ca n b e lin k e d to g e th e r b y th e ir c o m m o n fe a tu re s o r b y c o o k ­ ies, a n d lin k e d to p a g e s w h e re y o u lo g g e d in o r id e n tifie d y o u rs e lf in s o m e w ay.

Each a d o n a p a g e also g ive s th e a d c o m p a n y o n e o f th o s e q u e rie s , w ith y o u r c u rre n t p a g e as th e re fe re n ce , le t­ tin g th e m learn y o u r c lic k tra il.'S e a rch e n g in e s lo g all y o u r searches a n d h a ve a lre a d y h a n d e d o v e r d a ta to va rio u s g o v e rn m e n ts a ro u n d th e w o rld .

T h e re are a fe w w a y s o f e n s u rin g s o m e a n o n y m ity . For e x a m p le , y o u ca n d o w n lo a d th e p ro g ra m T or fro m eff.org, g e tth e T o r b u tto n p lu g in fo r F ire fo x fro m addons.mozilla.org a n d c ry p to g ra p h ic a lly b le n d in to th e c ro w d o fT o r users.

"C h illin g e ffe c ts " are w h e n w e are n o t fo rc e d to se lf­ c e n s o r b u t fa c e s ig n ific a n t in c e n tiv e s to d o so. Im a g in e fo r

a m o m e n t th a t all y o u r w e b b ro w s in g a n d p e rs o n a l d a ta w e re acce ssib le to y o u r in s u ra n c e c o m p a n ie s a n d p o te n ­ tia l e m p lo y e rs . S o m e e m p lo y e rs a lre a d y use Facebook p ro ­ file s t o d is q u a lify s o m e a p p lic a n ts .

Im a g in e th a t e v e ry th in g y o u c h o o s e to re ad o r w a tc h w ill a ffe c t th e im p re s s io n s o m e p e o p le o r a lg o rith m s w ill h a ve o f y o u . D o a te rm p a p e r o n a lc o h o l a d d ic tio n o r lo o k u p a se rio u s illne ss fo r a frie n d , a n d w a tc h y o u r in s u ra n c e p re m iu m s c h a n g e a b it. E x p lo rin g c o n tro v e rs ia l a n d u n ­ p o p u la r th in g s c o u ld a ffe c t y o u r im a g e .

N o w w h a t if y o u r o n lin e d a ta w e re v is ib le to all y o u r frie n d s , th e w a y s o m e o f it is n o w w ith th e Facebook m in i­ feed ? T h e re w o u ld b e re m a rk a b le n e w b e n e fits a n d e ffi­ c ie n c ie s a n d s e re n d ip ity w o u ld g e t an a lg o rith m ic b o o s t, b u t w e w o u ld also fe e l pressures to se lf-c e n s o r o r c o n ­ fo rm .

C o m b in e w e b d a ta w ith o th e r d a ta su ch as d e ta ile d p u rc h a s e h isto rie s, p h o n e logs, th e p o s itio n o f y o u r cell p h o n e o v e r tim e , a n d so o n , a n d y o u 'll fin d th e re is a lo t o f in fo rm a tio n flo a tin g a ro u n d w ith .no cle a r so cial a g re e ­ m e n ts o n priva cy. W h a t p riv a c y b a la n c e d o w e n e e d ? W h a t b a la n c e d o w e a c tu a lly have? ■

19.09.06 «The McGill Tribune • 11

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E D IT O R IA L

T h e 4 F lo o rs c o n u n d r u m

r ib u n e

w w w .m cg illtrib u n e.co m

Editor- in-C hief

James Gotowiec editor@mcgilltribune.com

Managing Editors

David Blye Traci Johnson seniored@mcgilltribune.com

Production Manager

Tiffany Choy production@mcgilltribune.com

N ews Editors

Kayvon Afshari M att Campbell Kate Spirgen news@mcgilltribune.com

O pinion Editor

Adam Smith opinion@mcgilltribune.com

Features Editors

Rachel M elnik Elizabeth Perle features@mcgilltribune.com

A rts & Entertainment Editors

Crystal Chan Ben Lemieux arts@mcgilltribune.com

S ports Editors

Charlie Blore Aaron Sigal

When an issue is too divisive for our editorial board to reach a consensus on it, we feel that our readers are better served by two competing editorials that look at all sides of the debate. With that in mind, we tackle the party everyone loves to hate: 4Floors— ^should it stay or should it go? t

GET RID OF IT

UNLEASH THE POTENTIAL cGill students are spoiled.

Not only do we get a qual­ ity education for a pretty reasonable price, but we get it in a city with a nightlife that can rival any other in North America.

This, along with our status as Canada's best university, has given us a great sense of pride in our school, but surprisingly little school spirit.

We've got the inflated ego and the smug sense of superiority over other universities, but no real affection for the school itself. After Frosh, most of us leave our enthusiasm for McGill behind and continue on with our academic careers, occasionally look­ ing back with fond memories of our eagerness to party on campus.

4Floors is a perfect example of this phenomenon. No one goes to what should be the biggest party of the year because it's "only for fresh­ men." Apparently only freshmen are stupid enough to go to a party on campus. The rest of us (supposedly) sophisticated, intellectual types forgo the event, making it a serious flop in recent years.

Now the formerly famous bash is pulling the dead weight of a few

M

years of failure, but that doesn't mean that we can't turn it back into the kind of party it could— and should— be.

4Floors isn't problem-free. Huge lines have always been an issue, so some people who make it down to Shatner leave after standing around for an hour. SSMU needs to figure out how to get people to actually come out, and then shorten the waiting time once they get there.

Maybe with shorter lines and a few freebies to entice the masses it can be revived.That and a little school pride without the condescending at­ titude.

What could be better than a huge party on your own campus with your fellow students, where you don't have to worry about tipping the bartender? Maybe we're just too cool for school spirit. Whatever the case, McGill is famous for great par­ tying, so why can't we throw a good party on campus? With $2 beers, free T-shirts and an opportunity to draw obscene pictures on your friends, this year's should be one of the best par­ ties of the year. Cheap beer is cheap beer and even the kids from Concor­ dia understand the merit of that. ■

eing number ten on Playboy's list of top ten party schools should mean something. For starters, it should mean that we're capable of throwing a pretty good party. But if the annual 4Floors bash held in the Shatner building is any indication of our standing, then we must have been ranked there in spite of our inability to do so.

Hailed this year as "the return of a campus legend,” one has to ques­ tion at what point in time these par­ ties were ever worth talking about.

Sure, there are cheap drinks and food,-but that's no different from any departmental beer and pizza. More­ over, a party spanning four floors is no longer a marquee event; by head­ ing a couple of blocks south from the Shatner building towards Ste-Catherine's, one can find a plethora of bars and clubs with better music, better booze and most importantly, a bet­ ter crowd.

More renowned as a campus fable for the ihcoming froshies, the majority of students avoid 4Floors for its legendary long lines and no­ toriously younger crowd. And who can blame anyone in second, third

or fourth year for staying away? At! the end of the night, no one wants to wade through the remnants of first-year vomit, spilled beer and who knows what else on four different floors.

Many argue that this is a reputa­ tion problem. We all remember our first 4Floors, and so will never go back again. But even when the party was: revamped last year into the Ménage à Trois, the event still failed to bring in crowds worthy of anyone's plan­ ning or party time. Perhaps it was the French name that confused the resi­ dents of our mostly English-speaking campus. Nevertheless, this should be: an indication that no matter how you dress it up, 4Floors no longer reso­ nates with the general student body.

When it takes place, this year's party has a lot to live up to. It needs to be the place to be on Friday night and it needs to shed its historically dreadful reputation. If it doesn't suc­ ceed in doing so, SSMU should take it as a final sign that the glory days are gone and it's time to stop trying to resurrect the party, cut the dead weight and move on to more prom-; ising ventures. ■

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work at a record store and we have a listening counter on the basement level: a broad semi­ circular counter with a half-dozen control pan­ els and headphones jutting out of it at two-foot intervals. Customers stand about shoulder-length apart, skimming through the liner notes of a po­ tential purchase, bopping their heads rhythmi­ cally. I'm the dude who stands behind the counter rewrapping discarded and unloved CDs, placing them in section-specific piles which ascend grad­ ually towards the ceiling as the day wears op.

Every day, without fail, someone steps up, quickly examines the goings-on of my work envi­ ronment, turns to me and ventures a guess: "Is this the check-out line?"

Brilliant. The answer, to myself, invariably: “Fuck, man. I dunno. Are you paying in cash or in headphones?"

The situation is very much the same in other parts of the city. Public transportation users en­ gage in daily struggles with the back doors of bus­ ses: I'm sure we've all seen those irate passengers madly waving their hands a few feet away from the motion detectors while the bus is moving or heatedly pressing against the doors without even bothering to contemplate the possibility that the steps beneath them are pressure activated. I mean, it's not like it's written right in front of them.

I

Or take an Off the Board piece yours truly wrote last week proposing "masculinism."For what I felt was an utterly harmless piece of writing, the Tribune received letters of complaint and accusa­ tions of sexism and misogyny. You would figure that people in their third year of university would clue into the fact that the mere use of the term "masculinism," in addition to denoting General Tao's chicken as exotic foreign cuisine and arbi­ trarily combining laundry loads as economical and productive, is fairly laced with irony and sar­ casm. Or not. Maybe Perceiving Irony is a fourthyear course.

See that? That was sarcasm. I know full well that irony isn't taught in school, the same way that I know women are equal beings metaphysically speaking, though underrepresented in govern­ ment and certain areas of the workforce.

All these shenanigans came full circle last week while I was reading about McGill's no. 8 list­ ing in High Times's counterculture heavyweights.

Naturally, some McGill tight-ass stuck his neck out to say, "This is so ridiculous. It makes us sound like a bunch of stoners when we're actually all so busy studying that we don't have time to get high."

And this, dear readers, is the nature of the beast. We're all too busy studying.

I'm not proclaiming that people should put

away them lame-ass books and start rockin' the ganj 'round the clock, just that we take stock of what our environment is doing to us. McGill's campus comprises some of the brightest young people this side of the tropic of Cancer. I mean that. Any number of the people whose paths you cross daily could write you a hefty dissertation on why Africa is in such pitiful political and economic shape, explain in detail how J.B. Watson changed the way we examine the human mind or build you a snowmobile in a couple of days. And yet these very same people have trouble grasping irony or how to open motion-activated doors.

As a society, we've all become gifted at read­ ing, retaining facts and contributing in pur work­ place and occasionally at home, but lost touch with just about everything else. We're seeing gen­ erations of people who are book smart but not street smart.

We must embrace this duality within our­ selves. We must become hybrids: part Hawking, part Shaft. We must observe our surroundings with an eagle's eye and a fox's sly wit. We must take time away from our books and our work to nourish the person inside of us who desperately wants to not look like an idiot, and in doing so, give ourselves a teleological rebirth. Ashes to ashes, funk to funky. ■

The McGill Tribune is an editorially autonomous newspaper published by the Students' Society of McGill University in collaboration with the Tribune Publication Society. Letters to the editor may be sent to letters@mcqilltribune.com and must include the contributor's name, program and year, and contact information. Letters should be kept under 300 words and submitted only to the Tribune.Submissionsjudged by the Tribune Publication Society to be libellous, sexist, racist, homophobic or solely promotional in nature will not be published. The Tribune reserves the right to edit aHcontributions. Editorials are decided upon and written by the editorial board. All other opinions are strictly those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the McGill Tribune, its editors or its staff. Please recycle this newspaper.

12 • Opinion • 19.09.06

The McGill Tribune

L e tte r s t o t h e e d ito r hierarchies sh o u ld be m a in ta in e d if th e y w ere an d N e w York State ru n d e e p e r th a n his first is n o n e th e le s s h a rd a n d p e rh a p s im p o s s ib le We thought he was kidding I am w ritin g in response to th e o p in io n e q u a lly d is trib u te d a m o n g genders, b u t that's d a y as head co ach o f th e N e w York G iants in t o fix a b s o lu te c rite ria th a t can d e te rm in e th e piece e n title d "P roud to be a m an a g a in "b y Ben . a w h o le o th e r story.

2002. F urth e rm o re , o n e need n o t have be en o v e ra ll w o rth o f e v e ry a rtis t o r w o rk .

Furthermore, I find it is very dishonest to b o rn in N e w York C ity to b e a N e w Yorker o r to Le m ieu x th a t a p pea red in th is last Tuesday's — E zra G lin te r e d itio n o f th e Tribune. I fo u n d b o th its basic present recent improvements in men's cooking be c o n ce rn e d a b o u t th e c ity itself. Such a n o ­ U2 E n g lis h L ite ra tu re p ro p o s itio n an d th e a rg u m e n ts offe re d in su p ­ capabilities and housework participation by tio n serves o n ly to insu la te N e w York C ity fro m p o rt o f it to be n o th in g s h o rt o f preposterous. presenting a few examples that cannot be ap­ th e re st o f th e state. I d o agree w ith Blye, h o w ­ It's pronounced hawnbook First, it is d isin g e n u o u s to ju d g e an e n tire m o v e ­ plied generally. A recent British study showed ever, th a t C ou ghlin's c h o ic e to w e a r an FDNY I d o n 't w a n t to d ra g th is h a n d b o o k m e n t b y its m o s t e x tre m e m em be rs. As a m an that women still do almost twice as much ca p o n th e sidelines a t G iants S tadium w as b u siness o u t a n y lo n g e r th a n n e e d be, sin ce housework as men do. And this is not count­ in d e e d sincere a n d a p p ro p ria te , b u t he an d I fra n kly, it's p re tty a w k w a rd fo r e v e ry o n e in ­ a c tive in progressive p o litic s w h o has w o rk e d an d c o n tin u e s to w o rk sh o u ld e r to sh o u ld e r ing for the fact that women do more childcare have each reached th a t c o n clu s io n fo r d iffe r­ vo lv e d , b u t I can s im p ly n o t le t s ta n d s o m e w ith d e d ic a te d an d even radical fem in ists, I can and are now working às well. Of course, a good e n t reasons. o f th e in a ccu ra cie s a n d u n fa ir s ta te m e n ts say fro m firs t h a nd e x p e rie n ce th a t th e "rabid, proportion of men out there are now more re­ — T im o th y G o rta m a d e in th e tw o a rticle s in th e la te st issue o f d o m in e e rin g , a n ti-m a le stan dard bearers" are spectful and involved in housework, but there U2 Classics th e T rib u n e . First o f all, th is is n o t an issue o f in fa c t fa r fro m b e in g stan dard bearers, an d are is still a lot of work to do to achieve some sort c e n s o rs h ip o f ra cy c o n te n t. T h e sexual p h o ­ Don't be dissin' Leonard Cohen in re ality a sm all frin g e o u ts id e o f m o s t fe m in is t of equality. The very structures of our society to s w e re in a p p ro p ria te (and fu n n y ), b u t th e y In his S e p te m b e r 6 "P op R h e to ric" c o l­ w e re n 't a c tu a lly th e issue. T h e in itia l e d ito rs th o u g h t. T he o v e rw h e lm in g m a jo rity o f fe m i­ and the attitudes of a lot of men— I'm sure you nists d o n o t in d is c rim in a te ly th ro w th e ir scorn know some of them— still have to change. And u m n , Ben L e m ie u x arg u e s th a t L e o n a rd C o ­ c h a n g e d th e ir p ro p o s e d th e m e fro m 50s o n all m en, b u t seek instea d to th ro w lig h t o n they will have to change, whether masculinists hen's m u s ic "sucks," d u e to lack o f vo ca l a b il­ style g ra p h ic s to s e x /n u d ity w ith o u t in fo rm ­ ity, ta c k y b a c k -u p vocals, a n d "soulless a n d in g o r c o n s u ltin g a n y o n e .T h e h a n d b o o k also th e in s titu tio n s in o u r so cie ty an d c u ltu re th a t like it or not. w o rk to m arginalise w o m e n , an d keep th e m — P h ilô m e La France u n in s p ire d " in s tru m e n ta l parts. H e preface s in c lu d e d a series o f fa c tu a l erro rs a b o u t im ­ fro m re ach in g th e ir fu ll p o te n tia l. th e s e c o m m e n ts , h o w e ve r, b y a d m ittin g th a t p o rta n t w e b site s, c o n tra c e p tiv e in fo rm a tio n , U3 E n v iro n m e n t "th e d u d e 's a g re a t po et," a lin e in v a ria b ly u t­ a n d in c lu d e d c o n te n t e x tre m e ly o ffe n s iv e to I also c h a lle n g e Lem ieux's basic su p p o si­ te re d b y th o s e w h o d o n 't e n jo y th e m u s ic o r fra n c o p h o n e s a n d Q u e b e c re siden ts. N o t e v ­ What makes a New Yorker? tio n th a t w e have progressed to th e p o in t th a t It w as w ith g re a t in te re st th a t I read s in g in g o f a h ig h ly a c c o m p lis h e d lyric is t (B ob e ry o n e w h o a tte n d s M cG ill is w h ite , s tra ig h t, fe m in is m is an o u td a te d p h ilo so p h y. A n y o b ­ je c tiv e lo o k a t th e state o f o u r so cie ty w o u ld D avid Blye's piece o n 9/11 an d its s till-c u rre n t D yla n c o m in g to m in d as th e o th e r m a jo r ex­ C hristia n , u p p e r-m id d le class a n d fro m T o ro n s h o w us th a t w o m e n have a lo n g w a y to g o resonance, especia lly in N e w York City, m y a m p le ). I su sp e ct, h o w e ve r, th a t if critics su ch to .T h e h a n d b o o k s h o u ld re fle c t th a t. B lanket b e fo re re ach in g fu ll eq uality. H o w m a n y fe ­ h o m e to w n . W h ile I u n d e rsta n d Blye's a tte m p t as L e m ie u x w e re g e n u in e ly a p p re c ia tiv e o f s ta te m e n ts w e re m a d e a b o u t th e c o n te n t o f m ale p rim e m inisters have be en e le cte d in to disp el th e n o tio n o f a necessary d iffe re n ce . C ohen's p o e try , th e y w o u ld q u ic k ly realize th e o rig in a l h a n d b o o k in th e T rib u n e , b u t it th e ir o w n rig h t? H o w m a n y C anadian c o m p a ­ b e tw e e n 's o -c a lle d "N e w co m e rs" a n d "S urvi­ th e re la tiv e in s ig n ific a n c e o f his vo ca l d e fi­ s h o u ld b e n o te d th a t o n ly te n p e o p le e ve r nies have fe m a le CEO's? W h y is it th a t fo r e ve ry vors," his use o f N e w York G iants head coach cie n cie s. J im i H e n d rix, fo r e x a m p le , w as also sa w th e h a n d b o o k in its o rig in a l fo rm . T h e six d o lla r th a t a m an in Canada earns a w o m a n Tom C o u g h lin as an e x a m p le o f a "N e w c o m e r" n o t a g re a t vo ca l ta le n t, b u t th a t is g e n e r­ SSMU execs, th e tw o in itia l e d ito rs, a n d th e earns 75c? Yes, g e n d e r in e q u a lity has been re­ is s o m e w h a t p ro b le m a tic. First, his cla im th a t a lly o v e rlo o k e d in lig h t o f his o v e rw h e lm in g se co n d set o f e d ito rs. A n d if a t least e ig h t o f d u cin g , b u t it is still alive an d w e ll in Canada, C o u g h lin is "n o t a N e w Y orker" is s o m e w h a t a b ility as a g u ita r player. L e m ie u x also states th o s e te n p e o p le fo u n d it u n a c c e p ta b le a n d an d a n yo n e w h o w o u ld say o th e rw is e m u s t be c o n te n tio u s an d is, perhaps, th e re sult o f a th a t "y o u w o n 't m e e t a s in g le -p e rs o n o n th is o ffe n s iv e , it seem s re a so n a b le to a ssum e th a t d ivo rc e d and o u t o f to u c h w ith th e social reali­ m isa p p re h e n sio n a b o u t w h a t c o n s titu te s a ’ p la n e t w h o w o u ld n 't ra th e r h e a r J e ff B uckley m a n y o th e r s tu d e n ts w o u ld have fo u n d it ties in w h ic h w e live. If m e n like Le m ie u x really N e w Yorker. Yes, C o u g h lin w as n o t b o rn an d sin g o n e o f his tu n e s th a n th e m a n him self." likew ise. Je nna a n d I e n te re d a d iffic u lt s itu ­ w a n t to ch a n g e w o m e n 's m inds, th e y had best raised in N e w York City, b u t he is still a N e w C erta in ly, if y o u d o n 't a p p re c ia te th e p o e try, a tio n w ith an in te n s e d e a d lin e . W e d id e v e ry ­ keep th e ir m ouths, s h u t instead o f s p o u tin g Yorker in th e sense th a t he w as b o rn and th e n it is easy to d ism iss th e c h a rm o f h e a r­ th in g w e c o u ld to re sp e ct a n d a c k n o w le d g e th e laug hab le , baseless p o sitio n s expressed raised in N e w York State, sp e cifica lly in W ater­ in g it d ire c tly fro m th e m o u th o f th e p o e t, th e w o rk p u t in b y th e o rig in a l e d ito rs. M u c h in th e T rib une , an d in th e process re in fo rc in g loo, a to w n ro u g h ly th e sam e d ista n ce fro m as L e m ie u x u n h e s ita tin g ly does. But, as w ith o f th e c o n te n t w a s le ft u n to u c h e d (a lth o u g h th e stere o typ e s a b o u t m e n th a t he poses to N e w York C ity as T o ro n to fro m O tta w a . A nd th e w o rk o f a n y v a lu e d a rtist, th e re is alw ays ’w e d id m o v e th e m a rg in s o v e r b y h a n d b y b e against. A n d also, sh am e o n th e T rib u n e fo r yes, C o u g h lin w as n o t e d u ca te d in N e w York s o m e th in g d is tin c t a n d in im ita b le a b o u t 1/8 o f an in c h o n o v e r 20 0 in d iv id u a l pages). p u b lis h in g such a u n fo u n d e d , s h o d d ily -w rit- C ity eith e r, b u t he d id a tte n d Syracuse U nive r­ th e cre a to r's o w n p e rfo rm a n c e , rather- th a n Sara a n d G en also re ce iv e d b o th fu ll c re d it as sity, a N e w York state in s titu tio n n o t far fro m te n article. a n o th e r's in te rp re ta tio n th e re o f. W h a t w o u ld e d ito rs o f th e fin is h e d p ro d u c t a n d w e re pa id — D evin A lfa ro his h o m e to w n o f W aterloo . C o u g h lin , as Blye a n y classical m u sic fa n g iv e to h e a r B e e th o ve n in fu ll, d e s p ite th e fa c t th a t th e fin is h e d p ro d ­ J 2 S o c io lo g y again c o rre c tly p o in ts o u t, w as n o t in N e w York p e rfo rm in g his o w n w o rk , e v e n if th e s o u n d u c t th e y p ro d u c e d 'w a s d e c la re d in a p p ro p ri­ C ity w h e n th e attacks occu rre d , b u t his c u rre n t q u a lity w a s p o o r? C ritic is m s o f C o h e n aside, ate. So, trib b ie s , g o a h e a d a n d bash SSMU, o r G e n d e r equality?. In Ben L e m ie u x' fa n ta ­ te n u re as head co a ch o f th e G iants is n o t his h o w e ve r, L e m ie u x m ake s th e v a lu a b le p o in t Finn, o r th e c u rre n t h a n d b o o k , o r e v e n m e. sies! Even th o u g h th e re have b e en so m e im ­ first e xp e rie n ce w ith th e city. He w as th e w id e th a t "th e re are o b je c tiv e crite ria b y w h ic h B u t k n o w th a t e v e ry o n e in v o lv e d w as tr y ­ p ro ve m e n ts since th e suffragettes, w e still live receivers co ach o f th e sam e te a m fro m 1988 to all m usic, film a n d visu al a rt ca n b e ju d g e d in g to m a ke th e b e s t o f a b a d s itu a tio n , a n d I in a pa tria rchal so cie ty w h e re m e n d o m in a te 1990. Blye tries ve ry hard to p o rtra y M r. C o u g h ­ q u a lita tive ly." It s h o u ld also be k e p t in m in d , th in k th e e n d re su lt d o e s n 't suck. th e to p o f th e social, p o litic a l an d e c o n o m ic lin as a "N e w c o m e r" w h o em braces N e w York h o w e v e r, th a t w h ile th e re are c e rta in ly o b je c ­ — C a rly B oyce hierarchy. Just lo o k a t th e n u m b e r o f fe m a le C ity a n d its 9/11 legacy, b u t I fear it is a false tiv e c h a ra cte ris tics th a t ca n a n d s h o u ld be M o S o c ia l W ork MPs an d CEOs. This is n o t to say .th a t th o s e po rtra yal. C ou ghlin's ro ots in N e w York C ity used to e v a lu a te m u s ic a n d o th e r a rt fo rm s , it

We're Hiring!

U n a b le to g o a n y­ w h e re w ith o u t a ca m ­ era in to w ? K n o w y o u r w a y a ro u n d P h o to ­ shop? W a n t to have y o u r n am e in th e p a p e r o n a w e e k ly basis? You m ig h t be th e p e rfe c t c a n d id a te fo r a T ri­ b u n e P h o to Editor.

W e also need an O n ­ lin e E d ito r to h e lp us w ith o u r w e b site . Re­ s p o n s ib le fo r p u ttin g th e c o n te n t o f th e p a p e r o n lin e e ve ry w ee k, as w e ll as m a n a g in g th e fo ­ rum s a nd p o lls o n th e w e b site , th is p o s itio n w o u ld re q u ire a p p ro x im a te ­ ly fiv e to seven h ou rs p e r w eek.

If yo u are in te re s te d in a p p ly in g fo r e ith e r p o s itio n , send an e m a il to sen io re d @ m c g illtrib u n e .c o m fo r m o re in fo rm a tio n .

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CELEBRITY CHATTERBOX

H O W T O ...

R u s s e ll P e t e r s is

J u st d o n 't g e t c a u g h t!

/ /

T h e

a ll f o r c h e a t i n g "

C a n a d ia n

c o m

e d ia n

la u g h s

then go for it. As long as you feel that it wouldn't affect your conscience.

C a n a d ia n c o m e d ia n Russell Pe­ ters p e rfo rm e d la s t w e e k a t P lace des A rts a n d c a u g h t u p w ith th e T ribune to discuss college, c h e a tin g , a n d b e in g C a n a d ia n .

You're very p o p u la r w ith college students. W hat's yo u r fa v o u rite col­ leg e experience?

I never went to college.

H o w d o you feel a b o u t M o n ­ treal?

I love it here. It's a great city.

If you could n a m e th re e o f your favo u rite th in g s a b o u t M on treal, w h a t w o u ld th e y be?

Strip clubs, massage parlours and friteries.

H o w w o u ld you fe e l if you had a doctor, a n d he w as a b o u t to c u t you o p e n , and h e h a p p e n e d to cheat his w a y th ro u g h school, a n d th e n you died?

Well, I think that if he was such a talented cheater that he managed to get to the point where he was about to cut me open, then I think that, as a doctor, he's gotta be pretty damn good.

Yes, I've heard of McGill.

W h a t was y o u r im pression o f it?

It's hard for me to answer a ques­ tion like that because I never went to university. McGill is a university. I don't have impressions of any universities. I performed there once. The thing is, if they had me [perform there], it's probably not a very good university, (laughs).

D o you th in k it's right for college students to ch eat o n exams?

Yes! Absolutely. I'm all for cheat­ ing. If you can get ahead that way.

o f h ig h ly

Every path in life has a shortcut, a simple approach and an easy way out. It is common knowledge that the masses cheat in school, work and even dieting. Although we hate to admit it, almost every one of us has, at one point in our lives, found ourselves cheating at something or, even worse, on someone.

Of course, cheating in relationships has always been prime fodder for greedy gossipmongers. Bill Clinton's political career, for example, was tarnished by his pub­ licized affair with a Whitehouse colleague. The fact that he is a Rhodes scholar and great political thinker simply did nothting to justify his act of infidelity in the eyes of the media. Even though everyone knows that everyone cheats in Elollywood, Jude Law - once People magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive"- lost respect from his contemporaries and fans by cheating on his fiancé last year with his chil­

I didn't have to. I went to retard high school.

p la y a s

dren's nanny.

Although adulterous affairs can certainly have some serious repercussions, large numbers of people still con­ tinue to conduct them every day.Those that risk exposure claim to do so for a number of.reasons: personal insecurity, sexual boredom, stressful work environments, alcohol... the list goes on. Therefore, before we, the younger gen­ eration, settle down into extremely serious relationships and are forced to commit ourselves to merely one person for the rest of our earthly existences, it is important that we get any cheating inclinations out of our systems while we still can!

How does one accomplish said cheating without a guilty conscience? Byjustifying the act through a number of loopholes that tighten and close with the acquisition of a marriage licence. Here are a few basic rules for cheat­ ing on your significant other:

Rule # 2: What happens in Cabo, stays in Cabo. Reading week is the best week ever!

Your boyfriend will never, ever, run into the hot Spanish pool boy with a sexy accent, so go for it!

Favourite food?

Chocolate.

It was July, and somebody said 'I heard it was freezing up there.' And I looked, and the temperature was ac­ tually hotter in Toronto than in LA.

e ffe c tiv e

Rule # 1: "Hos in different area codes!” For all you students in long distance relation­ ships: if they are more then 200 miles away, how are they going to know?

D id you cheat in high school?

W hat's th e stupid est th in g th a t you've heard Am ericans say a b o u t C anada, living in LA?

H ave you heard o f McGill?

h a b its

J o a n n a R e z n ic k

a t M c G ill s tu d e n ts Rachel M elnik

s e v e n

Rule # 3: What happens in Utah, stays in Utah! Take a summer internship here, because only in this great state do they turn a blind eye to polyga­ my.

Rule #4: "We were on a break!" This infa­ mous line can be used in a number of situ­ ations. For example, pick a tiny fight with your significant other, then take part in an act of cheating. It didn't count because you were in a fight, right?

There's th e co m m o n m e ta p h o r th a t th e US is a m e ltin g p o t an d th a t C anada is a m osaic. Today, I read a q u o ta tio n th a t says C anada is m ore like a tossed salad th a n a mosaic.

W h a t is Canada like to you?

Rule #5: "I did it for charity." If the guy claims he has a terminal illness, then you performed a good deed... even if you had never heard of graft-versus-host syn­ drome (Arrested Development, anyone?).

Canada, to me, is a country that never addresses how racist it really is.

I'm not afraid to say it.

Rule # 6: Claim mental insanity. They do it in court, why not do it while courting?

W h a t do you th in k o f th e CBC?

I think the CBC stands for "Cana­ dians Buying Content."

W eirdest th in g a jo u rn a lis t has asked you:

Journalists always ask me the same kinds of questions. I don't get weird ones very often. But the most annoying question I get asked is 'What did your parents think when you told them you were gonna be a comedian?' because it's not like I told them I was going to molest children for a living, or something. It's not like they didn't get it [my decision to be­ come a comedian]. They were like 'al­ right, whatever.'

cc

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M onday

T u e sd a y

Rule #7: It isn't cheat­ ing if you don’t re­ member it! This rule is self-explanatory.

Alcoholic influence is a part of the uni­ versity experience.

Although these rules may serve you well as you delve into the art of relationship cheating, keep in mind that our generation's affinity for shortcuts is exemplified through our avid use of technology. Therefore, your unfaithful activities can be caught on camera and posted in a "friend's" Facebook album in a heartbeat. Consider yourself warned. ■

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Volunteers needed at the Cystic Fibrosis Society's Shinerama event. Email mcgill_shinerama_o6@ yahoo.ca

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Movies in the Park: Cult Classics of the 80s

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24

19.09.06 • The McGill Tribune •' 15

CHATTERBOX

T u r n in g t h e o r y in t o p r a c t ic e P r o fe s s o r o f e th ic s , m R a c h e l M e l n ik

As a former cookbook writer and antique dealer, this Austrialian-Canadian law professor and founding director of the Faculty of Law's Centre for Medicine, Ethics and Law is interested in everything from evolution to poetry.

What is the biggest issue at the forefront of the bioethics field?

Respect for nature, the natural and life...

Scientists tell us that early life on Earth came from meteorites and took 8oo-million years to develop... We're thé wondrous outcome of stardust and time. We're the first humans ever (and this is just the last 45 years) that are able to alter that development in less than a nano­ second.... So trying to decide on the ethics of what we should do and most importantly, what

e d ic in e

a n d

la w

we should not do is an amazing thing to think about.

What's the most inspiring thing about your profession?

It's extraordinarily exciting. You're right out there in... The debates, faiths and values.

An image I like to use [to describe medical eth­ ics] is a tree with roots. We need to have a hand grounded in the Earth and at the same time, we need to have our other hand reaching out to the sky.... We're exploring a vast amount of knowl­ edge, and what's inspiring to me is, the more that we learn and think we know, the more that we learn that we don't know. I was at the World Religions after 9/11 Conference hosted by Mc­ Gill and I heard a speech about Spirituality and Quantum Physics. It was absolutely fascinating.

One way to look at things [in the world] is that

m a k e s

life -a lte r in g

we're nothing but a mere reduction of atoms and molecules or energies. This is so extraordi-. nary, because we know so much that we know hardly anything. My field is a very strange com­ bination of the theoretical and the practical, of wonder and of hard science, and trying to hold those things together in what I call a creative tension.

What would you do if you weren't a pro­ fessor?

I've done quite a number of things. I wrote a cookbook at one stage; I was an antique deal­ er. ... If I weren't in law, medicine and ethics (and many other things)... I'd be a poet...[or] a journal­ ist. And I do write in the newspapers; it's my tiny contribution to the world of journalism. I love... putting ideas out there and seeing what hap­ pens. I like writing.

d e c is io n s

What is your favourite book?

I can't give you a favourite book— there are so many. I read many books and I have some old favourites. I just read Kazuo Ishiguro's Never Let Me Go. It intrigues me because of the work that I'm doing, in terms of what we might do with these new technologies. ...There's a great deal of potential for doing uniquely good things with them, and there's an equally strong potential for unbelievable harm and destruction of what it means to be human.... I'm very interested in the concept of what we have to hold on to for future generations. I think the Aboriginal, or First Nations Peoples' approach to that is that you should look seven generations backward and forward when making decisions.... You're not trying to deal with the immediate impact of things, but rather the future impact. ■ TELU S S T O R E S & AUTHORIZED DEALERS

O V E R H E A R D A T M C G IL L Last week, Features profiled the Web site OverheardinNewYork.com, which posts the bizarre dialogue of the savvy and not-so-sawy inhabit­ ants of the Big Apple, it may come as no surprise that students engage in some pretty peculiar - and in this case, downright wacky - tête- â-tête at McGill, too. The following conversa­ tion was overheard outside of the Mc­ Connell Engineering building.

d a ily

MONTRÉAL Carrefour Angrignon

Talk for h o u r s with h o t e x c h a n g e s tu d e n ts .

G e t u n lim ite d

Centre Rockland Centre commercial Le Boulevard Complexe Desjardins Fairview Pointe-Claire Galeries d’Anjou 5554, av. de Monkland

lo c a l c a llin g f o r t h e e n tir e s c h o o l y e a r.

Centre Eaton 4202, rue Saint-Denis 950 rue Sainte-Catherine Ouest 6146, boul. Henri-Bourassa Est Place Alexis Nihon Place Versailles Place Vertu

Girl: Hi cinsert name here> Guy: Hey, how was your summer?

Girl: It was great, thanks! (dramatic pause while she puts her books away) Guy: So, what are you taking again?

Girl: Oh, I'm in Behavioural Sciences.

Guy: Oh, awesome.

Girl: Yeah, we're doing a series of ex­ periments about how animals feel pain.

Guy: Oh, that's really cool. How can you tell if an animal is in pain though?

I mean, it can't yell, can it? (Thinks he's being clever, but the girl is much too serious for that.)

Girl: Oh, no, but the same kind of chemicals are released in their brains, works for pain and pleasure.

Guy: Oh so they get the pleasure too?

You know, I read somewhere that dol­ phins are the only other animals that have sex for pleasure.

Girl: Well, I guess that's half right, but animals do get pleasure from sex.

Guy: Oh cool, people have done stud­ ies and everything?

Girl Yeah, there's some studies done, and... well... it's not a real study, but I've seen it first hand.

Guy:... what do you mean?

Girl: Well, a couple weeks ago my cat was in heat... so I ... uh...

Guy: (horrified) You masturbated your cat. Seriously? Wow. Girl: Yeah... (the girl stands to up to leave) Guy: How did ...

Girl: Friend of mine held it down and I used a Q-tip.

Guy: Ah, it's a girl cat then.

Girl: Yeah.

Guy: I'll catch you later.

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Eavesdrop for the Tribune!

Send us any funny or strange conver­ sations you overhear around McGill campus:fea-

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F

E A T U R E S

B a n g a T A — it's t h e o n l y s l e e p t h e y w ill g e t D o

M c G ill

p ro fe s s o rs

Rachel M elnik Engaging in a one-on-one meeting with a professor at the front of Leacock 132 for more than five minutes is a fantasy envisioned by many McGill undergraduates. Professors have their own agenda to attend to (think: "publish or perish") and cannot provide personal atten­ tion to each of the hundreds of students in their classes. Consequently, these professors rely on the help of teaching assistants to grade papers, administer exams, lead conferences, labs and tutorials, and tutor students during of­ fice hours. As a medium between the students and instructors,TAs play a pivotal role in McGill's educational system.

Most TAs have a positive experience. Not only do TAs gain valuable insight into the world of teaching, but they also build a connection with their professors, many of whom become valuable future resources. Farrah*, a TA in the Faculty of Arts, claims that "the professors are

ta k e

a d v a n ta g e

really such a wonderful resource for us. They put in so much work and effort on behalf of the students."

Unfortunately, not every TA benefits from their position. Due to extremely long hours, low wages, and bad communication with their em­ ployers, a growing number ofTAs are victimized

by McGill's "poorly funded” academic environ­ ment.

According to the constitution created by the Association of Graduate Students Employed at McGill, teaching assistants are legally allowed to work only 12 hours a week, a total of 180 hours a semester. Certified in 1993, AGSEM represents approximately 2,000teaching assistants, roughly a third of McGill's graduate student population.

Twelve hours a week seems like a reasonable amount of time to attend classes, hold office hours and lead conferences and/or tutorials. But most TAs end up working more. "I usually put in over 25 hours a week," says Leslie*, another TA in

o f t h e ir T A s ? the Faculty of Arts. "That seems like an awful lot, but it's probably average, at least with the other TAs I have spoken to," Because TAs spend so much time working with their undergraduate students, their own graduate studies are often neglected. Emily*, works as aTA in a humanities course, claims that "the work that we're rewarded for, that we're ex­ pected to do ...in a timely fashion...often takes a back seat to our teaching." Lilian Radovac, presi­ dent of AGSEM and head of the TA union, as­ serts that“being a grad student is a full-time job. ... At a certain point, a grad student can spend well over 40 hours a week preparing his or her work." Holding what feels like two full-time jobs at once, many teaching assistants find the over­ all amount of time spent working to be unbear­ able. "The time-management aspect can be extremely challenging," says Farrah. "I'm having a difficult time balancing my TA duties with my regular [graduate] schoolwork." Even the pro­

fessors agree. "It's an extremely heavy workload," admits a Faculty of Arts professor, who teaches a large entry-level freshman course. "Ideally, the TAs are psychologically and academically pre­ pared to assume their resposibilities. But some­ times it doesn't work out."

A lot of these problems depend on the relationship between the TA and the profes­ sor that they work for. Emily admits that "some professors have been very respectful that kept track of the hours and shouldered most of the burden themselves. But I've also had some very frustrating working relationships. There were times when I felt totally overwhelmed, when I didn't sleep, where I was grading an obscene amount of papers." Alan*, a TA in the Faculty of Management, claims that"right now, the TAs are putting in a lot more time than the professors."

Professors often take advantage of their TA's position. "Occasionally, we get a complaint that a TA is asked to do some of the professors'

M c G ill W illia m & M a ry B r o w n S tu d e n t H e a lth S e r v ic e s , R o o m M c G ill U n iv e rs ity M c T a v is h S tre e t, R o o m M o n tre a l. Q C „ C a n a d a H A Y

3600 514 398-6017

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F a k in g it o n l y p r o l o n g s t h e a g o n y

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M E D IC A L N O T E

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_was seen at Student Heaith

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which their peers regard this "habitual and growing" problem across faculties. "It happens all the time. It's a joke," says a bitter Shaamini Yogaretnam, U2 Political Science. "According to some of my friends, the slightest cough, runny nose or even perfectly timed frown results in a signature on a paper that gets you out of something you should've been prepared for!"

Jennie Sardo, U2 English, agrees. "This is university, not high school. You pay to be here. If you don't want to do the work, well, no one is making you stay here. Other people would kill for this opportunity."

Others argue that the excess of students in the McGill Health Services center during exams is not the fault of slacker students who want to skip out on studying, but rather, a num­ ber that is representative of the time of year. "Stress can lead to illness. The less sleep you've had, the more prone you are to catch something. I honestly think that more people are sick dur­ ing exam season; not because of fakers, but because no one is taking care of themselves," a U3 Science student argues/'l don't know many people who would be willing to brave hours in line at that center, anyway, unless they really did need to see a doc­ tor!"

Director of Student Health Services, Dr. Pierre-Paul Tellier, offers some insight into the process behind this so-called prob­ lem at McGill. "It's important to understand that the notes that we give [at Student Health Services] do not tell a professor or dean that they should excuse a student from an exam," he ex­ plains. "What it does do is essentially outline what the problem is and what th e. p o s s ib le impact is on the abilities for the stu­ dents to study.’This means that a medical note does not, in fact, guarantee an excuse from assignments or exams, contrary to what many students are led to believe. It is the academic of­ fices that assess the seriousness of the case in relation to the assignment, not the doctors."It's all very unique to each faculty," Tellier adds.

He maintains that the academic deans are "quite fair" and suggests that McGill does, in fact, have a very good handle on the situation."Frequently, people are actually ill and that is a rea­ son for them not to write an exam. Other people are not physi­ cally ill, but extremely anxious, for example, or maybe drank too much coffee during the night and are in no shape to write the exam.Things of this nature do sometimes occur. But, again, we simply document that information, and it is up to the faculty what they can do."

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U n d e rs ta n d in g P la n e t Earth (EPSC 2 0 1 ) Fall and w in te r

T erri A lderfer As the so-called "Harvard of the north," McGill is well known both within Canada and internationally for its high academic standards. Students of this lauded institution like to think that their diploma will grant them an edge over other recent grads in the Canadian job market and place them somewhere near the top of the gradu­ ate school application pile. But is the value of a degree from McGill being undermined by the ease with which one can pull off an"A"grade in so many intro-level and elective courses?

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Meant to teach students about the origin of the Earth and its place within the solar system, this course has intro-level written all over it. Professor Anthony Williams-Jones says that while his inten­ tion is not to give out easy grades, "most people do very well," with about 25 to 30 per cent of the class receiving an A or A- each semester. Jenny (last name withheld), U3 international Develop­ ment, took the course last semester and received a grade of A-, despite her less-than-stellar atten­ dance record. 'I just took it as an elective because I heard it was an easy class," she says. Indeed, the class is as straightforward as it gets - all PowerPoint slides are online and Williams-Jones does not even require that students read the textbook, which he designates as an optional purchase.

T h e A rt o f Listening (M U A R 2 1 1 )

N atu ral Disasters (EPSC 2 5 0 )

Fall and winter Of all the arts, listening might just be the easiest to master. One of very few classes de­ signed for students who have no musical ex­ perience whatsoever, this course-introduces the sounds of classical music and their his­ torical context to students through, well, lis­ tening. Instructor Liz Blackwood says that the class average is usually on the high end, at either a B+ or an A-, based on two midterms, two assignments and a final exam. Alex Kang, UO Management, is hoping to snag one of those high grades."I heard it's an easy course. ... I want to boost my GPA," he says. Black­ wood tries to "keep the course atmosphere relaxed" and distributes handy course notes and review sheets before exams.

Fall only This course is offered through the De­ partment of Earth and Planetary Sciences to "examine the science behind different types of disasters," such as hurricanes, volcanoes, torna­ does, meteorite impacts and tsunamis. For all closet science geeks out there, this is definitely the course for you. Professors John Gyakum and John Stix provide an extensive explana­ tion of how to write the five-to-ten-page term paper, something few university profs take the time to spell out, and provide examples of possible exam questions in their syllabus. For Julia Barone, U3 Biology, Natural Disasters was an obvious elective choice since it is still sci­ entifically focused, but her friends "said it was pretty simple compared to biology classes."

A lso ru m o u re d to be o n th e lis t o f b ird courses: Terrestrial P lanets (EPSC 200), Children's L ite ra tu re (EDEE 325) a n d P o p u la r M u sic A fte r 1945 (M UAR 392).

19.09.06 «The McGill Tribune - 17 duties," says Radovac. "There are a lot of situations where professors askTAs to give guest lectures, or write manu­ als, in the case of science students. This can be a great opportunity for the TA, career-wise, but it is not techni­ cally part of their job description." Professors claim that, generally, the work is divided up fairly. Nevertheless, "there were some instances of professors being ap­ proached by overworked TAs," says another Faculty of Arts professor.

While teaching can be a full-time job, the majority of the TA's work remains unpaid. Emily insists that TAs "have to prepare conferences, grading, reading-materi­ als, which [is time] we don't get paid for, so if you re­ ally want to know the materials, inside and out—which most of us do, we want to be competent teachers— we're spending a lot of time pouring over the text and making it digestible to students in the class."

Radovac claims that graduate students are put into a very vulnerable financial situation. "Many TAs don't just work as TAs, [they] will also work as research assistants

and hold other off-campus jobs. ...They need to find a way to support themselves." Legally, TAs earn $21.52 per hour for their designated 12 hours a week. Radovac as­ serts that'McGill has one of the lower pay rates ofTAs at major universities in Canada. Teaching assistants at York University make $40 per hour."

TAs at McGill find themselves trapped within a sys­ tem that aims to exploit them. But they're not the only ones that are impacted. The plight ofTAs at McGill also has a huge effect on the undergraduate student body.

Radovac explains that "The biggest quality for good education is one-on-one attention. The bigger the classes become, the harder it is to provide a good qual­ ity of education. As negatively as the professor and the TA are affected, the person affected the most is the undergraduate...there would be no university vvithout the undergraduate students." ■

*Sources for this article have chosen to remain anony­ mous. Names have been changed accordingly.

Breaking th e hab it

While it is not the responsibility of the doctors and nurses on staff to assess the seriousness of the illness - be it mental or physical - in relation to the student's academic abilities, Tellier maintains that feeling stressed out "is not an excuse. We will write that on the note, but an academic dean will probably say'sorry.'Stress is part of writing the exam, part of the process... Unless it is something ongoing, or it is a pathological mental health disorder that causes anxiety on an ongoing basis."

One Ui Cultural Studies student and over-zealous cheater has admitted to faking illness to get out of com­ pleting over 20 assignments and exams in the past two years. This medical note maharaja shares these words of council to those who find themselves following a simi­ lar path: "You know, you may feel like you gain a victory every time you pull one over on the nurses, but in the end, it will bite you in the ass... trust me." ■

V

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G e o g ra p h y o f th e W o rld E co nom y (GEOG 216)

Fall only This is an economics course for the non-economics major. If you are interested in how the global economy functions on a macro level, but would rather pull your hair out than take an eco­ nomics course at McGill, this is a great alternative. Anna Neilson, U3 International Development, is excited about the course because it counts toward her major, but she admits, "at the same time, it's so basic and the professors are really good." Professors Breau and Akman teach using a variety of case studies to maintain student interest and use a simple évaluation system: three tests and a final exam.

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C o n tin u in g a fte r

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u n iv e r s ity A d a m S m it h

Most people think that getting ahead in business requires brains, hard work or good connections and sometimes more than one of them.

But if you're not the sharpest tool in the shed or you're just plain lazy, there are ways to cheat your way to the top.

The biggest advantage to cheat­ ing is that there is a lot of freedom in how you do it. This means that virtu­ ally anyone can engage in the fine art of deception, not to mention that it's a perfect outlet for pent-up creativ­ ity.

If you like to write, make up parts of stories like Detroit Free Press sports columnist Mitch Albom, or if you're really ambitious, imitate former New York Times writer Jayson Blair. After lying about his education to get him­ self hired, he filed dozens of articles containing false information. In some pieces, the fake details were small, but at other times he made up entire interviews or stories. After being fired, he wrote a book in which he accused the Times of racism.

If numbers are more your thing, fiddle the books a little bit. Account­ ing scandals have been all the rage in the last few years. Enron dazzled us for years with new and innovative ways to make money from the oil and gas industry before going bust when it turned out that it was all a sham, but even boring old telecom compa­ nies like Qwest and Worldcom have gotten in on the game.

Many people find accounting boring, but still like money. In that case, there's nothing bett e r than playing fast and

but that's peanuts compared to Nick Leeson. Leeson is the man to beat in this area after spectacularly— and sin­ gle-handedly— bringing down Bar­ ings Bank in 1995 by losing $i4-billion speculating on the Singapore Inter­ national Monetary exchange. Barings had been in business for nearly 250 years, so this was quite the feat.

If you would rather be spending other people's money than losing it, there are a number of great role mod­ els out there. Take Dennis Kozlowski, former CEO of Tyco International. He treated the company like a piggy bank, using it to pay for things like $6,000 shower curtains and a si-mil­ lion birthday party for his wife.There's also former newspaper baron Conrad Black, who is currently the target of a $20o-million lawsuit from Hollinger International— one of his former companies—after allegedly taking millions of dollars to pay for things like his Florida mansion (currently on the market for over $30-million).

Unfortunately, there is a down­ side to all of this cheating. Should you happen to be caught, the con­ sequences can be quite unpleasant: Former Enron CEOs Ken Lay and Jeff Skilling were recently convicted on several counts of fraud; Leeson spent six and a half years in jail in Singapore; Kozlowski was sentenced to eight years in prison; and Black is awaiting trial on over 20 criminal charges.

Going to prison does not exactly qualify as getting ahead, so if you plan to win by cheating the system, the trick is the same in the business world as it is elsewhere— don't get caught. ■

l o o s e w i t h

Cheater, cheater pum pkin eater: creative exam strategies NOT to use.

L T h e

O n c e a c h e a t e r ...

c o u rs e s

NOT AS EASY AS 1,2,3 ...

In tro d u c tio n to P sychology (P S Y C 100)

Don’t be deceived by the 100-level code that accompanies Dr. Donderi's class, which focuses on complex human behaviour, including perception, psychopathology and human learning. The level of scientific knowledge necessary to pull off a high grade may be more than the science-illiterate student can handle, In tro d u c tio n to P h ilo so p h y (PH IL 2 0 0 )

Contemplating the complexities of life is not exactly child's play. Professor Storrs McCall is as cute as a button, but his essay assignments (worth 60 per cent of your grade) can be killer. Does the existence of an omniscient God, who knows exactly what the future will bring, imply that free choice is an illusion? I don't know, you tell me.

S exual Ethics (RELG 2 7 1 )

Do not be fooled. This course, despite what it sounds like, is not a lesson in the ethics of freshman sexual escapades. More likely, students will be expected to debate the merits of social constructivism with relation to pornography in a six-page paper.

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other peo­ ple's dough.

Citigroup recent­ ly announced that it had fired a trader a few years ago after she cost the bank $20-million (all figu res U S ),

M c G ill S o m e ad vice fro m th e exp erts

So, when it comes to choosing courses to fill those cherished elective slots in your schedule, should you be looking to boost your GPA with ease, or taking an academic hit for the sake of challenging yourself to reach unprecedented levels of knowledge?

It depends on individual post-graduate goals and the strength of your record, according to Donald Sedgwick, senior advisor for the faculties of arts and science. "An employer is probably not looking closely at the individual courses... [but] admissions to gradu­ ate programs would look more closely," he says.

In any case, it is always beneficial to take a course that genuinely interests you. Deputy Provost Morton Mendelson explains that often, students take a course based on- rumours that it is easy, but by the third or fourth class they have already lost interest. Mendelson believes these students are "cheating themselves out of an opportunity to learn," not to mention wasting countless hours studying something they despise and probably will not retain anyway.

Grade as you will Though it may come as a surprise, McGill does not have a school-wide system in place to regulate class averages or en­ sure equal distribution of grades amongst students. "The content and difficulty of each course is made the control of the course instructor," says Sedgwick.

Only in instances where distributions are inexcusably high or low will there be an in­ vestigation as to why, explains Mendelson. However, this Mc­ Gill administrator sees no harm in soaring grades. "Just because everyone does well, doesn't mean there is a problem," he says. ■

18 - The McGill Tribune • 19.09.06

S T U D E N T P E R SPE C TIV E

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As I sat down to write this article, I was feeling less than inspired. Plagiarism is a topic that has been covered excessively, and it is also a rather boring one.

I've read the same warning paragraph on each of my course outlines this semester, as has everyone else.

Needing a fresh new angle, I did what any self-respect­ ing university student would do: I googled 'articles on plagiarism’ -ju s t for encouragement, of course. I came up with a bunch of ways to avoid plagiarizing, instances of cheating in the corporate world and some guidelines for teachers to combat plagiarism in their classrooms.

Unfortunately nothing I could...use. Damn it, I’d have to write this article all by myself.

Everyone plagiarizes, steals, and cheats just a little bit. People tell tiny white lies, recycle gossip from one friend to the next and repeat jokes from last night's Family Guy in everyday conversation. When students are taught to write essays, they learn to emulate these habits: go to the library, take out five books on your topic, see what the experts have to say. Later, blend them into one long paper, putting everything in your "own" words. No original ideas required, just remember to cite whenever necessary. Every essay becomes rev­ erent flattery of what all the "esteemed" writers have to say on the subject. It's a flaw in our educational system, which values "academic integrity" without requiring genuine originality.

Academic integrity. It's the part everyone skips on the syllabus in favour of checking how much participa­ tion counts for and whether the class includes a final exam. As soon as the professor begins the extremely vague but compulsory speech about the con­ Tumitin Ortytownry Rspor sequences of cheating B By SmUKson T oy3STZ MMSM&SSPM ID 4 in the university, our eyes glaze over. Thank­ fully, most professors finish discussing the subject within seconds, ending with the oftheard "for further infor­ mation, check the code of student conduct on­ line." Great. Except that no one ever does (ex­ cept me of course, but that was only yesterday In the context of this ar­ ticle). The problem with

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plagiarism is not so much the deliberate offender, who lifts entire paragraphs out of textbooks or off the Inter­ net and deserves their meetings with the Dean of Stu­ dents. It's the unintentional plagiarizes who need help discerning what is cheating and what's legal, which is made more confusing by the copy-and-paste manner in which we are all taught to write.

Article 15(a) of McGill's Code of Student Conduct and Disciplinary Procedures "No student shall, with in­ tent to deceive, represent the work of another person as his or her own in any academic writing..." It is that intention that makes it such a prevalent issue, because most of the time, students get caught plagiarizing without even knowing they had committed the crime.

Professor Monique Morgan of the English Department explains that plagiarism is a multi-faceted issue. When reading her students' work, she is now forced to be more suspicious, which she would of course prefer not to have to be. More than that though, students are get­ ting cheated out of the learning experience they de­ serve. In discussing McGill's method for dealing with plagiarizing students, Morgan affirms that the crime is, "taken very seriously in the cases where it should be taken seriously." She goes on to state though that more could be done to educate students early on about what the parameters are.

Students are not getting enough information about how to stay out of trouble with plagiarism and are receiving mixed messages about what formal es­ says should encompass. The disclaimer repeated year to year makes the offence sound like the kind of thing "that could never happen to me,” meaning most stu­ dents never imagine the real consequences of such a debilitating and ugly transgression. Most Mc­ Gill students are straight out of high school, where the speech on plagiarism runs along the lines of not copying off your neighbour dur­ ing a test.The university needs to emphasize that the word plagia­ rism signifies more than wandering eyes and students need to educate themselves on what academic integ­ rity really means. ■

Research: Research papers are, after all, founded on research, and research implies sources. A good rule of thumb is one book for every two pages and two journal articles for every three. So for a 10-page paper, you would want at least five books and seven articles, plus as many pri­ mary sources as you can get your hands on.

Prim ary Sources: A primary source is a direct piece of evidence about an event, rather than a work by a third party about that event. Com­ mon primary sources are statistics, personal journals, news articles, trea­ ties, government documents, etc...

Whenever possible you should use primary sources - they look good to professors and they provide the best kind of evidence for your thesis. The library has numerous primary-source collections, including the govern­ ment documents section and news­ paper collections (accessible through the LEXUS-NEXUS database).

Thesis S tatem ent: always have a clearly stated thesis! Because the whole point of an essay is to support a thesis, having a poorly-defined thesis - or no thesis at all - will get you into serious trouble. A thesis should be a single declarative sentence of what you intend to prove. It's often a good idea to ask a friend to read your intro and underline what he/she thinks is your thesis. If he/she can't find one, or underlines a different sentence than the one you had in mind, it might be time for a revision.

Body: It's hard to really make sug­ gestions about the body, since there's no "best" way to go about proving your thesis. For a 5-10 page paper, you should probably have between three and five main points, each of which is at least a large paragraph in length. Deal with each point sepa­ rately, proceeding in a logical manner from one to another. If you're talking about the impact of money on Amer­ ican politics, it would make sense to discuss primaries before elections, for example. Always make sure your points relate back to your thesis; if a given paragraph does not contribute to proving your argument, cut it out.

This applies in particular to historical

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background; it is all too easy to get carried away with descriptive stuff.

Lit Review: Human knowledge is acquired cumulatively, with each scholar building on the work of previ­ ous scholars and using their results as the foundation for the new insights he or she provides. For this reason, you should always do a quick search of influential books and articles relat­ ing to your topic. In many cases this will be part of your research process (see above) but in longer essays, you may want to review current thinking on your topic before proceeding with the essay. A good lit review should summarize the major perspectives on your topic, as well as the specific con­ clusions drawn by influential authors.

It is usually a good idea to provide opinions that differ from your own, if only to refute them later.

Citations: The library has a num­ ber of reference and citation guides that explain how to properly credit the research used in your papers. Al­ though it is usually not necessary to cite common historical knowledge ("Penicillin was discovered in 1928

by Alexander Fleming"), you should always cite direct quotations, theo­ retical concepts -and statistical data.

Additionally, any time you rely on a potentially controversial conclusion by another scholar, provide a cita­ tion of where you got that informa­ tion. That way your readers can assess whether your argument rests on valid information.

Conclusion: Your conclusion should remind readers of everything you told them and summarize your arguments and then assess whether or not your thesis has been "proven".

It usually makes sense to write a few sentences for every paragraph devot­ ed to a particular point in the body and then throw in one or two new points to tie everything together. As much as possible, try to use different words and phrases than you have used previously in your intro and body. This makes your points stron­ ger and easier to read because you avoid repetition. Another suggestion is to understate your points and use the language of probability, rather, then "proof". Examples would be: "the hypothesis is strongly confirmed""evidence clearly supports"; etc. ■

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J osh T ouyz "In the beginning, there was lust," and in the end, there was still lust. Alexandre Marine's latest stage production, Eevangile selon Salome, is a har­ rowing tale of a struggling youth, Salome, trying to resolve internal and external conflicts.The clas­ sic tale follows a series of modern theatrical twists, boasting musically inspired moments comple­ mented by a world of incestuous perversion, de­ ception and homoeroticism.

Viewed through the eyes of 13-year-old Sa­ lome (Marie-Eve Beaulieu), the play is a retelling of John the Baptist's beheading. It begins with a brief introduction of characters and history that serves as a prelude for a misanthropic clash between mother Heroditias (Monia Chokri) and her daugh­ ter, Salome, over John's affection. Although the play shoots off in many directions, it is centered on a dysfunctional family where - through their sexual wiles-women, rather than men, command power.

The piece weaves through a series of subplots involving uncle-stepfather Antipat's pedophiliac obsession with Salome, father Phillipe's neverending confusion and Salome's first sexual experi­ ence. The conclusion of the play, while abrupt, is in line with the notions that characterize the text and performances. It provides resolution for undeserv­ ingly nasty male characters, yet does not assign

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any redeeming qualities to female protagonists. • Marine's spot-on casting and sprinkled irony provide brief comedic pauses in the rather intense narrative, allowing viewers to enjoy the complex sous-entendus that would otherwise be lost in passing.

Monia Chokri gives a wonderfully sensual performance as Heroditias, while Marie-Eve Beaulieau's Salome is a mesmerizing portrait of innocence. Phillipe Cyr's interpretation of John is in line with classic elegiac figures and presents nothing innovative in terms of theatrical expres­ sion, whereas Vitali Makarov's (Antipas) fulfillment of a particularly deranged character yields a more liberal interpretation.

Various symbols in the play are employed to reinforce plot and character identity.The most no­ table include money, balls and a table. "The balls are supposed to represent innocence and at the same time are pieces of a phallic symbol"says Ma­ rine.

In a brief post-performance interview, Marine explains that the crux of the work is "its focus on the development of youth and how it relates to current adolescents. It's about female mendacity, sex as platform for power and the reconciliation of one's desires." He adds that as an artist, "it is for the audience to take away what they want from the play and not for me to tell them."

This play gets a favourable re­ view, though with a few disclaimers.

Some audience members might be shocked at the sight of partial or complete nudity, and all who attend should be able to understand quick­ ly spoken French. A working knowl­ edge of contemporary theatric pro­ ductions as well as an overview of Salome's historic importance would also be helpful; otherwise the piece may appear somewhat strange or even a bit offensive. But for those who enjoy boobs, balls and twisted family relations: two thumbs up! ■

Catch L'evangeline selon Sa_________________ \ome at Theatre Prospero (1371 OntarCOURTESY THÉÂTREDEUXIÈME RÉALITÉ io E) until Sept. 23.' Call (514) 526-6582 L'évangeline selon Salomé— innocence meets vice.

^or reservadons. Showings are at 8 p.m.

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renditions of newer songs that even some die-hard Snow Patrol fans had dismissed as fluff. Rather than leap right into "Hands Open," the first U.S. single from Eyes Open (which, incidentally, was not heard through­ out the entire evening), the band elected to play lesser known, smaller marvels like "Chas­ ing Cars"and "Open Your Eyes."Granted, none of these songs achieve the grandeur, or the sheer majesty of the Final Straw years, but the band truly committed to the songs onstage, embracing them with as much overt passion and dedication as they did any other song on their set list, which, aside from being truly ad­ mirable in and of itself, taught the audience a good lesson. Any band good enough to pro­ duce a record like Final Straw ought not be underestimated while still in their prime.

L.A. quintet Augustana opened the show with a bang, echoing Dylan and the Wallflowers in a smouldering set that not only transcended their merely average debut, All the Stars and Boulevards, but practically upstaged the headliners of the evening.

Be on the lookout for their return. ■

B en L emieux Unending curiosity regarding the con­ tent of the evening's set list was likely at the forefront of a Snow Patrol fan's mind on their way to the band's Sept. 12 Metropolis perfor­ mance. In 2004, the Irish heartthrobs relased The Final Straw Stateside and it was among the 30 best sellers in the U.K. that year and one of the best records of its generation. It was — and still is— a breath of fresh air in the ever-tiring, over-burdened realm of indierock songwriting. Cut to the present and the 2006 release of Eyes Open, a significantly less impressive studio effort that plays to the crowd — and to every pop-rock radio sta­ tion this side of Istanbul. The burning ques­ tion of the night: "Will they pull out the triedand-true Final Straw material to appease the crowd, or will they impress upon their loving masses the strength of their newer songs?"

They elected to do what any band of Snow Patrol's stature ought to do. They pulled off both.

After some off-setting technical diffi­ culties early in the show, the band slid into a more comfortable rhythm, displaying a much stronger command of the stage than in live recordings from two or three years ago. The five-man touring lineup, which has only been in effect for the past year, gave the band room to move and to do their more epic arrangements justice onstage. Old fa­ vourites "Chocolate" and the momentous "Somewhere a Clock is Ticking" — which singer/guitarist Gary Lightbody dedicated to all the hard-working, emerging Montreal groups of recent years — were performed with all the depth and texture that were pres­ ent on the album versions, infused with the more emotive dynamics of what was inarguably a stellar live performance. The audience ate the songs up like Biftek popcorn.

"To those of you who are here for the first time: welcome,"quipped Lightbody early in the show."You'll find it's very much like the Borg. You will all be assimilated."

By then, much of the audience could feel the allegorical nanotechnology running through their veins. Surprising to most of them, however, were the rather staggering Snow Patrolers setting Montreal ablaze.

P O P R H E T O R IC

M o s h in g t o M o z a r t V alerie G ordon et's talk about a typical concert experience. First, there is the jazz concert, the one at a trendy bar downtown. You go to swanky clubs such as Upstairs and listen to some whacked out players spin out jazz tunes. These tunes are so full of energy and funk that you won't hesitate to scream and shout, whistle and holla', especially considering all the noise from the drunken 45-year-olds in the back of the room, in fact, the more enthusiastically you appreciate the music, the better. It is deemed socially acceptable to express yourself as loudly as possible. At rock concerts this is particularly true, as fans are expected to react to the music both vocally and physically: Throw your entire body onto the stage and yell like a horse... or until you are hoarse. I wouldn't personally recommend this action because you might get kicked (liter­ ally) off the stage and break a bone or two, but some people seem to dig it.

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Now, imagine another scenario: You arrive at a differ­ ent type of concert. As you enter the auditorium, the usher hands you a program filled with everything you would ever want to know about the Grieg String Quartet in G minor.

Perfectly respectable and spectacled people arrive in po­

lite fashion; everyone whispers amongst themselves as the lights dim. Four performers take the stage wearing glittering black gowns, stringed instruments in hand. As the first chord sounds from the violinist, you show your anticipation with a good loud holler: "Now THAT'S what I'm talkin' ABOUT!!"

The socialite crowd, noses slightly higher than the average person's, turns around in silent shock. Meanwhile, the con­ cert continues without a flinch from the performers onstage.

A few moments later, there is an amazing demonstration of perfect vibrato from the violist. Of course, you are beside yourself, so you letoutagood loud "WooohtWoooht," which takes care of that. It's all about personal expression after all.

The grand finale of the concert ends in a frenzy of chro­ matic scales followed by a few good loud chords, all of which require something emphatic to exhibit the full extent of your appreciation for the music. Therefore, you launch yourself up onto the stage, arms waving above your head and bellow: "YAAAAA!" I guarantee that you will not get thrown off the stage, that there will not be any broken bones involved and that everyone will remember you for a very long time. And un­

like at the overrated rock show, you will not be deaf for a week afterwards due to high decibel levels. The adrenaline rush from a classical music show can be just as intense as any other concert experience, if not more so, due to the fact that everyone else is watching YOU the whole time. Talk about performance art.

While many classical concerts are perceived to be lowkey unemotional events, there is no reason why they cannot inspire energetic audience' participation. There needs to be more spunk, funk and roar to Beethoven and more jubilant, intoxicated Mendelssohn concerts. Both performers and audience members need to be in hysterics, or balling their eyes out, for at least a third of the duration of the show. I'm not suggesting that fans go to these concerts drunk out of their minds, however, classical concerts are not just extended naptimes either. When listening to classical music, let your­ self loose. If you feel like screaming, do so without hesitation; if you have an impulse to stomp your feet, go for it. Please do not bore the musicians to sleep with your lack of enthu­ siasm. We appreciate a few good loud bellows from offstage to keep us on our toes... so roar away. ■

The McGill Tribune

20 • Arts & Entertainment • 19.09.06

THEATRE C o m p il e d b y C r y s t a l C h a n

P r e v ie w s

Music: Pentanniversary: five good reasons to celebrate!,

T a k in ' o f f

Sept. 21 a t 8 p.m .; Pierre-Péladeau C en tre (300 M aiso n­ n e u ve E.). W a n t to see w h a t all th is classical m usic fuss P la y e r s ' T h e a t r e s e a s o is a b o u t a fte r re a d in g Pop Rhetoric? For its 2 0 th season Ensemble Pentaèdre is p re se n tin g a special c o n c e rt w ith B e t h a n n M c L aren g u e st p e rfo rm e rs A nya A lexeyev (piano), Y annick C hê neve rt (d oub le bass) an d th e P enderecki S tring Q ua rtet. M u ­ The air was filled with a sense of unholy curiosity at sical trib u te p e rfo rm a n ce s w ill ce le b ra te th e 250th an ­ Player's Theatre on Friday night. The playbill of Around the niversary o f M ozart's b irth , th e 150th an niversary o f S chum ann's d e a th an d th e World with les Dames en Disdress unabashedly labels the 100th an niversary o f S hostakovich's b irth . Tickets are $10 fo r stu d e n ts an d can be « show burlesque, a term that for most conjures up risqué mental images of scantily clad females and provocative p u rch ase d a t th e b o x o ffic e b y c a llin g (514) 987-6919.

Literature: A d rie n n e C larkson, Sept. 19 a t 7 3 0 p.m.; M a iso n

T h é â tre (245 O n ta rio E.). A n e v e n in g w ith fo rm e r G ove rn o r G eneral A d rie n n e C larkson w ill ta ke place to n ig h t rig h t o ff St. D enis o n Rue O n ta rio at M a iso n T hé âtre . T he focu s o f th e ta lk w ill be her n e w m e m o ir, Heart Matters, p u b lis h e d o n Sept. 12 - ju s t u n d e r a year since Clarkson's p u b lic title w as passed o n to M ich a ë lle Jean. In th e bo ok, Clarkson discusses e v e ry th in g % ■ - ! fro m her c h ild h o o d to h e r ta ke o n th e inside m a ch in a tio n s o f th e C anadian p o litic a l m a ch in e and th e historical b o n d to th e c ro w n .T h e p re se n ta tio n w ill be b ilin g u a l. Tickets are b e tw e e n $5-10. Call (514) 933-4201 fo r m o re in fo rm a tio n .

V

Art: N eo Rauch, O pe ns Sept. 14; M ontreal's M u se u m o f C o n ­ te m p o ra ry A rt (185 S te-C atherin e 0 .).The in flu e n tia l G erm an artist's first C anadian e x h ib itio n w ill b e a t o u r v e ry o w n M u ­ seum o f C o n te m p o ra ry A rt. His w o rk is h ig h ly s o u g h t a fte r by galleries an d a rt c o lle c to rs all a ro u n d th e w o rld . His p a in tin g is ico n o g ra p h ie , dream like, an d o fte n m akes use o f d iffe re n t visual m e d iu m s in c lu d in g c o m ic stirips, a d ve rtisin g an d film im ages an d is h ig h ly in flu e n c e d b y a rch ite ctu ra l d e sign an d E uropean history. Réal Lussier, c u ra to r at th e M M C A, explains th a t'th e in sta n t w e lay eyes o n a p a in tin g b y N eo Rauch, w e can scarcely re m ain in d iffe re n t. T he n a tu re o f th e s u b je ct m atter, th e tre a tm e n t o f space, ru p tu re s o f scale an d in c o n g ru ity o f ce rta in m o tifs -co n sp ire to rive t o u r a tte n tio n an d de stabilize us."

Film:' All the King's Men, o p e n s Sept. 22. This m o v ie a b o u t a p o litic ia n th a t tu rn s c o rru p t (surprise, surprise) trie s to g o fo r O sc a r-w in n in g pu nch es, p e rha ps try in g to recreate th e A ca d ­ e m y A w ards success o f its 1949 prede cessor o f th e sam e nam e, w h ic h w o n th re e Oscars in c lu d in g Best Picture. Based o n th e P ulitzer Prize w in n in g no vel b y R ob ert Penn W arren, th e m o vie tells th e sto ry o f p o p u lis t S o u th e rn p o litic ia n W illie Stark, played b y Sean Penn. T he d ire c to r a n d w rite r, Steven Zaillian, w as also th e sc re e n w rite r o f Schindler's List an d Gangs of New York.

O th e r b ig hitte rs in c lu d e A n th o n y H opkins, Ju de Law an d Kate W inslet. Perhaps to o m u c h p o te n tia l fo r its o w n good...

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only minutes for the cast to completely engage their spectators. Small though the audience was, I have seen many a high budget West End or Broadway performance that failed to engage its audience even half as much as les Dames did. Adding to the energy in the room was the wonderful support of a live band. In a small venue, it is refreshing to experience the talents of real, live musicians, as opposed to recorded music only.

Around the World with les Dames en Disdress is a highenergy, bawdy, musical and dance performance that will leave you toe-tapping and dancing long after the music stops.This show has the rare ability to impart to its viewers an original kind of sexual energy not often seen on stage.

Oh, and as an added bonus, if you sit near the front, you'll get one genuine shot of vodka courtesy of Luci Furr, Miss Sugarpuss during the "Those Russians" scene. ■

striptease acts. From the first scene, the performance succeeded in fulfilling .preconceived notions of the bur­ lesque genre. The show was brimming with slapstick humor, bawdy songs and yes, striptease acts and nearly nude woman (and men!). Oh, and tasseling, lots of tasseling.That said, les Dames is worlds away from a Super Sexe style performance. In the words of co-producer and head choreographer Shauna Feldman, "while there is some nu­ dity in the show, we focus more on the art of the tease, reminding people that sometimes it's what you can't see that turns you on the most." Feldman points out that "in ’ Runs Sept. 21-24 at 3480 McTavish, 3rd floor. Call a city like Montreal where there is no shortage of naked (514)398-6813 for reservations; tickets are $8 for adults,. $6 for flesh, it's nice to revive an older, more traditional version students/seniors. Thursday and Friday shows at 8 p.m.; Satur­ day at 2p.m. and 8 p.m.; Sunday at 2p.m. of'sexy" This was exactly the most striking feature about les Dames in Disdress. In a society continually inundated with very specific ideals of beauty and sexuality, it was a plea­ sure and a relief to watch a performance that used the body, sensuality and nudity to celebrate a different kind of sexy; These girls and guys do not just conform to any consumerist notion of what it is to be sexy. As Feldman puts it, a burlesque performance like les-Dames "allows women, [and men] to own their performance and by the nature of that performance, their own sexuality as well." Maxime Bégine, who plays M. E. Norme, pointed out that one way in which the actors of les Dames are able to own their per­ formances is through the huge amount of improvisation that constantly occurs on stage. Also, unlike many tradi­ tional forms of theatre, many of the les Dames' performers are actively involved in the staging and choreography of their show. The show is brimming with highly talented in­ dividuals, many of whom are seasoned veterans in opera, dance and musical theatre.

Unlike some more traditional forms of theatre, it is blatantly evident from the beginning of this show that the performers are all fully comfortable with themselves and with each other, and as a result, have an outrageous Cinched up and sexy. amount of fun. The energy on stage is infectious; it took

Event: In te rn a tio n a l Car Free D ay an d Envirofest, Sept.

22. S tarted in Paris in 1998, Car Free Day has b e en an an­ il H D nual g lo b a l e v e n t ever since an d its c o rre sp o n d e n c e to ’ ■ M cG ill's E nvirofest m akes it o n e o f th e best reasons to V skip class. Roads a ro u n d th e city, in c lu d in g m o s t o f Sher­ r i brooke, w ill be closed fro m 6 a.m. to 4 p.m . A ctivitie s II A V w ill b e run o n ca m p u s fro m 10 a.m. to 3 p.m ., in c lu d in g Uf l I S h u g e ga m e s o f stre et h o cke y an d soccer, synch ron ized b ikin g , an d an im p ro v show . E nvirofest a c tivitie s w ill be ta k in g place a t th e sam e tim e o n th e B urnside fie ld . You can also p a rtic ip a te in th e c ity w id e ' La marche des entreprises o n S te-C atherin e b y m e e tin g at 11 a.m . a t th e e splana de o f Place V ille M arie. See th e N ew s se ctio n fo r m o re in fo rm a tio n .

when is the last time a movie made you beg for mercy?

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in theatres September 22

19.09.06 • Arts & Entertainment *21

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F IL M R e v ie w s

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company it initially conjures Garden State: the Sequel, the most telling comparison for The Last Kiss is its true parent, L'Ùltimo Baccio. In many respects The Last Kiss is so similar

C rystal C han

In The Last Kiss, a Hollywood remake of the 2001 Ga­ briele Mauccinofilm L'Ultimo Baccio, Zach Braff finds him­ self almost-30 and on the verge, looking dazedly around in the suspended moment before he walks quietly into baby-and-coupledom for the rest of his life.

Michael is a 29-year-old stuck in a happy yet me­ diocre life, with "no more surprises." He is well employed and waiting the birth of a child with his girlfriend of three years, Jenna. All is well until his eye is caught by the sexily immature Kim, played by Rachel Bilson of The OC fame, who is a politically correct and less-shocking college coed instead of a high school student as in the movie's original version. The mediocre and mundane lives of a host of connected characters surround Michael, includ­ ing Jenna's parents and Michael's three close friends.The result is the interweaving of three characters in wildly different stages of life, whose problems are suspiciously similar. Everyone is in a deteriorating relationship, and the movie operates unconsciously on a sense of morbid curi­ osity from the audience.

Although the movie may point out that wisdom does not necessarily increase with age, the players in this ensemble drama seem to prove otherwise. Perhaps it was her comfort and admiration for director Tony Goldwyn, whom she has known since he was 10, but Blythe Danner as Jenna's philandering and aging mother gave the strongest performance by far. The wife trapped in a marriage with an unappreciative husband is not a new Zach Braff searches for something more. story character, but Danner offers a simple and honest portrayal that smartly avoids histrionics. Her passive-ag­ to LLUItimo Baccio that it is not so much a remake as a gressive husband Stephen, played by movie veteran Tom mere repackaging. Dialogue is almost word for word in Wilkinson is the other strong characterization. Stephen's the majority of the scenes. The difference is in the ulti­ confrontation with Michael over the sexual betrayal of mate message- the Italian L'Ultimo is more cynical, and his daughter Jenna is the focal scene of the movie. Mi­ therefore more honest, managing to be more entertain­ chael laments his prestructured life, but vows that Kim is ing in the same go. his "last kiss.” Stephen then becomes the bullhorn for the Goldwyn tries too hard to dress to impress, so the movie's message, that“what you feel only matters to you!" film's reality is thwarted by a desire to shoot a symbolic The older, seemingly wiser man explains that it is what birds-eye-view of Zach Braff curled around a doormat you do to the ones you love that matter, not the feeling that says HOME on it - an image that you may have seen itself. How do you show your love? By telling the truth. in-the movie's trailer. The movie is slow-moving, trying The moral of the story: the truth will set you free. It to express visually what it could be doing emotionally, is a fitting one; the American response to the movie's real trying too hard as well to aim for the loftier moral that European origins, yet it is also the key difference that il­ love needs work. The edge that made LiUltimo work was lustrates why the first try was worth it and the second precisely that it did not try to deny that truth is overrated just a stale copy. Even though a new movie with Zach and often ignored and that in the end, sexual desire is Braff at a standstill in his life with a great soundtrack to ac­ the real catalyst for relationships - both their beginnings and endings.

The Last Kiss tries to be profound amongst the profane and silly. It tries to be a mirror to reality, but by doing so it fails to be nothing more.than a string of soap opera vingettes that the audience watches from afar. It is decent enter­ tainment fare, as are soap operas, but the success of the movie will be most affected by the movie's unsure footing in any genre of experience. Too much of a cold relationship wake-up call for a date movie, too silly in parts to be a gritty drama, too much a cinema vérité attempt to be a comedy - the movie is difficult to digest. One leaves the the­ atre as uneasy as every character in the movie is in their twisted personal rela­ tionships. ■

The McGill

IT WORKS! Call Paul at 398-6806

R e m e m b e r y o u a d v e r t is in g r u n s fo r 7 d a y s in T h e M c G ill T r ib u n e a t a v e r y lo w r a t e - b o o k y o u r s p a c e n o w !

B en L emieux

Walter Trout. Full Circle. If you manage to ignore the truly horrendous cover design on this one, the re­ sult is likely the most listenable and enjoyable record Trout has ever released, or perhaps simply the least assaulting. A guitarist who has been known for his overextended, overblown solos, fiery fretboard work and musical showiness exercises a pleasant dose of re­ straint on his latest, offering the powerful eight minute opener "She Takes More Than She Gives," which boasts a pleasant guest performance by British blues legend John Mayall and the most soulful, expressive guitar playing Trout has ever laid down. Following in the motif of recent B.B. King and Buddy Guy releases by having guest musicians in the studio for every track on the album, Full Circle is a winding, unpredictable first listen, but ultimately a track-by-track, hit-or-miss affair. Other master blues axemen such as Jeff Healey and Junior Watson offer some fresh, innovative turns forTrout, keeping him on his toes all the while. On the other hand, cham­ pion yawners like Coco Montoya and Joe Bonamassa have some flashy chops but remain predictable and uninspired as ever. It's like Jay's grandmother used to say, "What's a good plate with nothing on it?" Many of the tracks on Full Circle, however, are worth repeated listening for aficionados of guitar-driven contemporary blues-rock.

John Mayer. Continuum. Roughly three years ago, it was fair game to exhibit disdain towards John Mayer. As a songwriter, he brought nothing new to the table, neither lyrically nor sonically. His early, songs were radio-friendly vignettes, auditory crack to bevies of impressionable teenage girls who sent Mayer into platinum territory. Whoopee. But lo and behold, last year.Mayer threw the music world, a curve ball with Try!, which not only helped to distance his image from the good-looking Dave Matthews everyone figured he was, but was a doggamn good record. Joining forces with Steve Jordan and Pino Palladino - two of the finest live players and more prolific musicians on the planet - Mayer began to show his true colours. Not only does the Berklee lad have a genuine passionand a deft touch for blues and old-school R&B soul, but also has the guitar skills to put the rest of his generation to miserable shame. On the Autobahn to critical success, Mayer now releases Continuum, a 12-track confirmation that his lively trio was not a commercial distraction and that the new - and im­ proved— John Mayer is here to stay. No more prototypical glam shots on the cover. No more tepid, withholding songwriting to be found here. Continuum is back-to-basics with style and class. Mayer lays right into the thick of it with "Waiting on the World to Change,"an anti-war anthem which speaks directly to an entire generation. Also enjoyable are studio cuts of "Vultures" and "Gravity," some of the finer adult pop moments on Try! enhanced by devilishly smooth production and poignant vocal deliveries by Mayer himself."In Repair" provides a lustrous, penultimate climax to an album which also reveals him to be at the top of his guitar-playing and lyric-writing abilities. Continuum will make you swear off of Dave Matthews for life and think twice about ever calling Mayer a hack again.

This dog ate all of our stories.

A n d w e d o n 't p a rtic u la rly w a n t to ta n g le w ith h im .

W ill y o u h e lp us w r ite s o m e n e w ones?

M e e tin g s fo r A&E: M o n d a y s . 530 p.m .

G e rt's P ub 3480 M cTavish. a rts @ m c g illtrib u n e .c o m

514-398-3666 is t h e

by

Now playing at Paramount Montre­ al, Cavendish and Marché Central, among others.

Rachel Bilson makes her film debut as... a ditzy ingenue.

T h e M c G ill T r ib u n e

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22 • Arts & Entertainment • 19.09.06

A&E r e t r o s p e c t iv e Even th o u g h he d ie d 36 years a g o ye sterd ay, his m u s ic is a m o n g th e m o s t tim e le s s a n d in flu e n tia l e v e r p ro d u c e d . Jim i H e n d rix a rg u a b ly c h a n g e d th e e le c tric g u ita r s o u n d m o re th a n a n y o th e r g u ita ris t in his­ to ry . H e w a s th e g u ita r p la y e r w h o b ro u g h t d e ft use o f o v e rd rive , fe e d ­ b a ck a n d th e w a h p e d a l to th e m asses a n d fo llo w in g in th e fo o ts te p s o f Eric C la p to n 's days w ith C re am a n d Jo h n M ayayll's Bluesbreakers, w as a m o n g th e firs t to sw e a r b y th e M arsha ll S tack (a m p lifie r) to g iv e h im o n e o f th e lo u d e s t, m o s t b lis te rin g g u ita r so u n d s to a c c o m p a n y his le g e n d a ry p la y in g te c h n iq u e .

H a ilin g fro m S eattle, Jim i H e n d rix m o v e d to N e w Y ork C ity in th e m id -1 9 6 0 s to e s ta b lis h h im s e lf as a m u sic ia n . H e p la y e d as a rh y th m g u i­ ta ris t in a n u m b e r o f loca l o u tfits , m a n y o f w h ic h he w as kick e d o u t of, b e in g th a t e v e n his rh y th m p la y in g w o u ld o v e rs h a d o w th e ba n d 's lead g u ita ris t. H e w a s fin a lly n o tic e d b y A n im a ls bassist C has C h a n d le r in 1967, c o n v in c e d to fo rm a g ro u p a n d s ta rt re c o rd in g in B ritain a n d ro c k e te d to s ta rd o m th e re a fte r w ith b a c k -to -b a c k -to -b a c k to p 10 sin g le s in th e UK. T h o u g h he o n ly released th re e s tu d io a lb u m s b e fo re his u n tim e ly d e a th in 1970, w e ll o v e r 50 a lb u m s o f live d a te s a n d u n re le a se d s tu d io m a te ria l w e re m a ste re d a n d released p o s th u m o u s ly . T h e v o lu m e o f w o rk h e g e n ­ e ra te d in th e re a lm s o f p s ych e d e lic, p ro g -m e ta l (in its e a rlie st fo rm ) a n d b lu e s excee ds w h a t a n y o th e r ro ck g u ita ris t (w ith th e o s te n s ib le e x c e p ­ tio n o f Frank Z a p p a ) has a c c o m p lis h e d in su ch à b rie f span o f tim e . • N o te w o rth y a lb u m s : Band of Gypsies (live re c o rd in g ), Electric Ladyland, South Saturn Delta, Are You Experienced?

VLADIMIR EREMIN African artifacts and authentic sculptures on display at Galeries Simon Blais, 5420 St. Laurent blvd.

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F R O M r : i E D IR E C T O R O F “ T H E F U G IT IV E ”

RISK EVEj?¥1H*Mt« SEPTEMBER

A F amed C oast G uard R escue S w imm er is re - assig ned to teach at the legendary C oast G uard “A ” S chool and inspires one cocky rookie to learn the true meaning H eroism and S acrifice P ick up passes to the special advance screening of T H E G U A R D I A N at the T ribune office 110 S hatner building ' RATED G in theatres SEPTEMBER 29,, 2006 No p u r c h a s e n e c e s s a r y

S p o r t s R ED M EN FO O TB A LL— LAVAL 4 3 , R ED M EN 2 7

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There's an old cliché in sports: "You have to play 6o minutes to win." McGill found out the hard way on Saturday that there's still a lot of truth in that expression. Despite going into halftime with an n point lead, the Redmen failed to pull off what would have been a huge upset against the top ranked team in the country, losing to the Laval Rouge et Or 43-27 in' front of 1,749 spectators at Molson Stadium.

McGill was dominant in the first two quarters, amassing 303 yards of offence to Laval's 147. But the second half was a completely different story. The Rouge et Or exploited the McGill defence, scoring on all but two of their second half possessions.

"I told them they have to play 60 minutes and we didn't do that,"said Head Coach Chuck McMann.

"They were intense in the first half but we lacked a bit of that in the second half. I told the guys I was proud of how they played and that if we start playing like that the whole game, we're going to start winning".

C o m in g o u t w ith guns blazin g

The Redmen came out like they had something to prove. Coming off an embarrassing 27-16 loss last week at Bishop's and going up against a team that had beaten them in 13 of their 18 meetings, few would have given McGill a chance in this one.

But a quick start on offence and a motivated showing on defence made it clear that this was not going to be a cake walk for Laval. Quarterback Matt Connell led the Redmen into the end zone on their first two possessions with drives of 57 and 107 yards respectively, while the defence pressured Laval Quarterback Benoit Groulx, forcing an interception and causing two sacks.

"I think we should have won," Connell said. "I think we outplayed the number one team in the country, so I hope people actually start realizing that we're a team that can play. Hopefully we can come out and play like we played in the first half the rest of the season".

McGill's offence proved potent, if not one dimensional, in this affair. Connell went 38 of 53 for 426 yards with two touchdowns and an interception— setting new school records for most passing attempts and completions in a game. It was also only the third time a McGill quarterback has thrown for over 400 yards, with Connell holding all three of those marks.

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That didn't leave much work for star running back Michael Samman who carried the ball just five times for five yards, giving him 15 yards on 11 carries on the season.

"We watched tape all week and were well prepared," Connell said. “We knew what we wanted to do, we have a great group of receivers; we wanted to hit the underneath stuff and let the receivers make a play" That's just what they did. The receiving corps was led by slotback Greg Heatherington, catching eight passes for 172 yards, including a 57-yard bomb for his only touchdown of the game. Not to be outdone, Erik Galas racked up a career high 12 receptions for 112 yards and a touchdown of his own.

U p set dashed b y u g ly th ird q u a rte r

Whatever magic the Redmen had. in the opening half, they lost it on their way backfrom the locker room. On their first play from scrimmage of the half, Connell threw the ball right at two Rouge et Or defenders giving Laval the ball at the McGill 22 yard line. It was a sign of things to come. Laval would go on to score on every one of their third quarter possessions. In 15 minutes, McGill would see their 11 point lead evaporate into a six point deficit.

"I don't think we played badly in'the second half, they just came out stronger," said linebacker David Riendeau. "They're a team that's known for closing out games well. We have to be better in­ coverage, we were too loose and they burned us on it".

Coverage was only the beginning of the defence's troubles. Groulx led the charge for his squad completing 21 of his 26 pass attempts for 316 yards, with two touchdowns. But McGill also failed to stop the run for a second consecutive game as running backPierre-LucYao ran for 128yards on just 11 carries.

To pile on the Redmen's woes, they may also have lost the services of defensive leader JeanNicholas Carrière. The third year linebacker had to be helped off the field in the third quarter with an apparent knee injury and was seen on crutches after the game.

McGill will look to notch their first win of the season next week at home against Mount Allison. It's R e d m e n le ft k ic k in g th e m s e lv e s . certainly a game they should win as the Mounties didn't win a single game last season. ■

T H IR D M A N IN

Tw o Lo n g s d o n 't m ake a right A a r o n S ig a l

oes anyone else hear that laughing? It's coming from the south, somewhere below the 49th parallel. That sound is our American counterparts buckling over at our blind devotion to this pastime of ours— one which, yet again, has embarrassed us for taking it seriously.

That laughter is a direct result of the actions of the New York Islanders. Do the Isles realize that the lockout produced a new salary system? Under the NHL's. new collective bargaining agreement, salaries were to be regulated by multiple caps on player earnings. A direct by-product of this new rule was supposed to be the extinction of long-term contracts. With a. hard cap system, teams could no longer afford to bind themselves to one player for an extended period of time as that salary would count against the cap each year. Now, NHLers would have to settle on frequent trips to unrestricted free agency and shorter-term engagements with any team.

But clearly, the Islanders missed that memo. Maybe their former general manager Neil Smith shredded it on his way out of town. Either way, it's led to problems. Last week, Charles Wang— the enigmatic owner of the once dynastic

D

Islander franchise— signed goaltender Rick DiPietro to a

15-year contract worth $67.5-million, amounting to roughly $4.5- million per season. So for the next 15 years, no matter the level of DiPietro's play, he will be earning $4.5 million.

When this goalie is 37 and on his last legs, the Islanders will have to shell out $4.5-million each season for another three years. The contract is sheer lunacy and shows a total lack of foresight.

DiPietro, a former first overall draft pick, has been, at best, an average goalie in the'NHL up to this point in his career— he has a .900 save percentage and a goals-against average of almost three. Additionally, and probably most tellingly, he has won exactly one playoff game in his career. Finally, DiPietro's strongest attribute— his puck handling ability— is a skill that has been severely restricted under the new NHL rules. The simple truth is that DiPietro isn't very good.

Now, the Islanders are stuck with a mediocre goaltender forthe rest of his career. Why the rest of his career? Because the way the contract is strüctured makes DiPietro untradeable.

NoGM will ever take a player under contract for such a long term, and no GM will ever relieve the Islanders of a signing

that will cripple them for the next 15 years and, possibly, j beyond. When DiPietro's skills inevitably decline due to age and the Islanders become interested in a new goaltender, Ricky D's $4.5-million will still appear on their balance she* eating up a large fraction of now valuable cap space. And for | good measure, Wang, being the nice guy that he is, included a clause which allows DiPietro to receive the full value B of the contract should the goalie suffer a career-ending | injury. Hypothetically, if DiPietro blows out his ACL this year in preseason and can never jump in the crease again, the | Islanders will be stuck paying a ghost $4.5-million each year j for 15 seasons. Also, DiPietro has ultimate job security now.

Where is his incentive to play? He will never have to elevate his game to earn a new, higher-paying contract.

What is happening on Long Island? Wang is already J paying hack Alexei Yashin top dollars because of an ill advised' 10 year contract he signed when he first arrived on the Island.

One would have thought that experience would have ber the ultimate teacher.

What else is there to say?. Charles Wang signed Ri DiPietro to a 15 year contract! ■

The McGill Tribune

24 • Sports • 19.09.06

P R O F IL E — M A R T L E T S S O C C E R F R O M T H E C H E A P SEATS

R is h w o r th b r in g s a

Canada, T o m su cks!

w o r ld o f e x p e r ie n c e K iw i a d d s

in te r n a t io n a l fla r e

A aron S igal

.

Aside from its claims of Canadian superiority, McGill loves to boast about its international flavour. It is a magnet for many foreign students who wish to study in the West, or more specifically, in Canada. However, the international character has typically been confined to the lecture halls and seldom seen on the soccer pitch.

Hannah Rishworth is the only player on the McGill Martlets soccer team who hails from outside North America. Not only does she provide a unique worldly perspective to the already powerful Martlets side, but she also adds something even more valuable and rare: international experience. < While most of her fellow students were enjoying their last moments of summer freedom, Rishworth— a native of Auckland, New Zealand— spent this past August in Moscow representing her country at the

"I'm not a flashy player and I'm not the fastest person out there but I think I'm very consistent and dependable back there. Those are the qualities you need in a defender.

— Hannah Rishworth FIFA Women's Under-20 World Cup. Although the Kiwis did not advance past the initial group stages, the experience of playing for her country and participating in the top-flight competition was a treasured moment in her soccer career, as well as her life.

“FIFA really treats the women like they treat the men in the competition," Rishworth said. "We stayed in five-star hotels in Moscow and we had police escorts driving us around. It was really cool. But no one really expected us to make the World Cup, and we were an underdog team. We put in a lot of hard work and the whole team stepped up."

It is this international experience, along with her sense of hard work and attitude of winning that makes Rishworth such an important addition to an already talented Martlets squad. When he recruited her, Head Coach Marc Mounicot quickly noticed Rishworth's skill and knew she would be a valuable a piece of the Martlet program.

“You always have to recognize the players with international experience," Mounicot said. "You never see these typés of girls at McGill who have played at the World Cup. For me, this experience is priceless."

to

s q u a d

New Zealand to Canada Born and raised in Auckland, Rishworth spurned New Zealand's premier sport— rugby— and found her passion on the soccer pitch early in life. Quickly, she developed into a tenacious central defender with a keen ability to make the solid defensive plays.

"My strength is in understanding and reading the game," Rishworth said. "I'm not a flashy player and I'm not the fastest person out there but I think I'm very consistent and dependable back there. Those are the qualities you need in a defender."

Although she lived and played soccer in Ottawa earlier in her life, being in Canada at McGill has been a new experience for her. Only here on exchange for a semester, Rishworth will have a short stay in Montreal.

Coming out of high school in Auckland, she considered going on exchange to an American university for soccer, although she eventually settled on Canada and the academic-athletic synthesis of the McGill Martlet program, where she could play a pivotal role as one of the team's central defenders. She clearly picked the right time to join the system - the Martlets have an extremely potent squad this year and their focus is undoubtedly on capturing an elusive national championship.

"I've always said that I'd like to see this team [McGill] play my Under-20 team," Rishworth said. "I think that it would be a really good game. We have a strong side and we're very similar."

Down but not out Unfortunately for Rishworth, the sports gods have thrown her a cruel twist of fate. Last week, the star defender severely damaged ligaments in her foot when making a slide tackle during practice. Although no bones were broken, th e injury will threaten her season with the Martlets. While she will be fully healed in about three months, because she is only at McGill for a semester, her career here may be over as soon as it began.

"She is a very humble person with great skills and I'm just so upset that she may be out for the majority of the season," Mounicot said.

Even though the injury has derailed Rishworth's contribution, to McGill, the international flavour and experience she provides will still be crucial intangibles necessary to any championship run. Relegated to cheerleader for the time being, hopefully McGill will have one last chance to see Rishworth's talent before she hops a plane back to Oceania— in the national championships. ■

M att S egal

guess I'm unpatriotic.Though, born and raised in Canada— and a lifelong fan of the gridiron game— I have never made a secret of my disdain for this country's knock-off brand of football or its ramshackle convening body, j the Canadian Football League. What mystifies me most about the CFL isn't < » its poor management, weak talent pool, inferiority complex or laughable quality of play.These things I understand. I am confounded by the fact that, in spite of all these problems, people actually enjoy this stuff. Believe it or .

I not, the CFL has many fans. Though watching this tripe in minus-28 degree weather doesn't appeal to my sensibilities, I know people who squirm with excitement just at the thought. May the Lord have mercy on their souls.

After my attempts at letting sanity prevail, invariably the intransigent J lover of single points and cumbersomely large pigskins will ask me whether I've ever actually watched a full game— surreptitiously assuming that I'll I instantly fall in love with this Canuck junk once I do. Mostly out of protest, but partially because of my short attention span, I've always responded ! sheepishly that, despite my best efforts, I had never seen an entire match. I | have now rendered that argument null and void. I viewed every last I excruciating moment of Friday night's snowy mid-September match-up I between the Calgary Stampeders and the Winnipeg Blue Bombers. Some ■ things I noticed: 1. There is actually a CFL player named Tom Canada. It's not too good * to be true. He plays defensive end for the Blue Bombers. I like to think that his parents uncovered a World War ll-era propaganda comic at the exact j moment of their son's naming. Except for the fact that was born in Iowa!

2. You know that curious play where the kicking team can get a single | I point even if it screws up? Apparently, they don't call them “rouges"anymore.

I What a shame; it truly incorporated the unique bilingualism 6f Canada. Sadly, j Francophones can no longer fête their favourite team scoring a "red".

3. Bluebomber's cornerback Robert Bean picked off a pass in the end ! zone and was pushed out of bounds. How come that's not worth a point?

Consistency people, please.

4. Announcers Chris Cuthbert and Glen Suitor were acting like a coup of codgers over last week's touchdown celebration by the Stampeders. TSN replayed the clip and it was quite possibly the most amusing thing a CFL • broadcast has ever known. Receiver Elijah Thurman teamed up with the other wideouts and used the track that surrounds Commonwealth Stadium's football field to run a mock 4 x 100 relay, with the football as the baton. It was brilliant. Personalities are what keep us watching:_Everybody knows Warren Sapp despite the fact most NFL teams have a better defensive tackle. Market ! the entertainment, folks.

5.The CFL promises scoring and wide-open play. On a night when one team scored 43 points, the pace was lethargic— I can only imagine what a I low-scoring contest must be like! All that punting seems to be the culprit; the three-down format requires frequent changes of possession— it's not t I theteams'faults.

6. Wait, maybe it is their fault! I noted three times in the first half where Winnipeg-ran the ball on first and second down, then punted. Infuriating!

7. The quality of fflay is remarkably lousy. Passes routinely sailed yards away from their targets and there were several big gains that were only permitted by shoddy tackling, including one where Bombers defenders j | missed Stamps RB Joffrey Reynolds six times before bringing him down.

8. Though the score was 43-9 after two late scores by the Stamps, : j some 30,000 hardy fans were still sitting in the stadium, despite the blustery, j winds and sub-zero temperatures. This was oddly reassuring; Instead of concluding that the sport must be worth braving these conditions, I was | more convinced than ever that there was something wrong with them and I not me. | Either way, I did it. I actually made it through all four harrowing quarters.

Should someone engage in the CFL versus NFL debate again, I can now j defend my contempt for the CFL with a little more credibility. More than ever, I have little doubt in my ability to settle the dispute once and for all.

I Unless, of course, my opponent pulls out the ultimate trump card: What else is there to do in Calgary, Winnipeg or Regina on a Friday night? ■

I

A

R is h w o rth a n d N e w Z e a la n d h e a d e d t h e ir w a y in to t h e U -2 0 W o rld C u p .

T h e re re a lly is a T o m C a n a d a !

w w w .m cgilltribune.com

19.09.06 • Sports • 25

MEN'S SOCCER— REDMEN 2, SHERBROOKE 1

Redmen stutter to victory McGill earns tight win over Sherbrooke H aydar M ah d i 'W ith Sherbrooke having prevented the Redmen from reaching the playoffs in each of the last tw o seasons, it's not difficult to imagine why this meeting was such a scrappy affair.

And while it won't erase the memories o f post­ season dreams dashed, McGill managed to exact a little revenge by edging out a 2-1 victory at Molson Stadium.

Despite sloppy play which resulted in a slew of giveaways and four yellow cards, the Redmen managed to eke out a narrow victory on Friday night. McGill dominated play throughout but struggled to bury its chances, needing an own goal by Sherbrooke defender Charles-David Racine to earn the win.

"I know, and the players know, that we can do a lot better than that," said Head Coach Philippe Eullaffroy. “In terms o f quality, it was a little bit disappointing— but we won, and that's the most im portant thing. It's very promising because we won while not playing very well."

McGill opened the scoring in the 4 3 rd minute when midfielder Alec Milne tapped in a deflection from inside the six yard box. The setup came off a corner which was flicked on by midfielder Olivier Brett through a crowd o f defenders to a wide open Milne.

Vert et Or goaltender Elie Saint-Laurent was kept busy all night stopping six shots en route to earning himself player o f the match honours. Despite being peppered early and

often, Saint-Laurent managed to keep his team alive with big first half stops, especially off the foot of Shawn Amarasekera who found himself frustrated on tw o golden opportunities.

The Redmen would finally break through again in the 56th minute as striker James Scholefield took a throw-in and banked a low pass o ff Vert & Or defender CharlesDavid Racine into the net for a 2-0 lead.

Redmen take fo o t o ff the gas too early

F rom th e re , M cG ill se e m e d to le t u p a b it, a n d a lm o s t a llo w e d S h e rb ro o k e to g e t b a ck in to th e m a tc h . D e s p ite ra re ly th re a te n in g th e R e d m e n n e t, th e V e rt e t O r a lm o s t sc o re d a lu c k y g o a l in th e 59th m in u te after McGill carelessly gave away possession in their own If a Redman third. Defender Dominik Desbois was forced to clear the goal line with an impressive header.

Sherbrooke also took advantage o f some complacent defending, playing a few solid through balls and using their speed in the latter part o f the second half. Most notably in the 72nd minute, when substitute Guilhelm Couderc sprinted past the Redmen backline, forcing

VLADIMIR EREMIN

kicks a ball and no one is there to hear it. keeper Olivier Boulva to race out o f the penalty area to save a loose ball.

Sherbrooke would finally get on the board in injury time on a goal from Adrien Durand but it would be too little too late. ‘ Our focus is an area we need to work on," captain Daniel Jones said.‘ We need to maintain our focus for 90 minutes.’

In spite o f fielding a very defensive 4-6-0 formation, the Redmen struggled in their own end, as poor positioning opened up gaps for Sherbrooke. McGill will need to work on playing in their own end if they hope to be competitive in tough upcoming fixtures against Concordia and Laval. ■

WOMEN'S SOCCER— REDMEN 2, SHERBROOKE 0

Second half surge sinks Sherbrooke Win keeps Martlets on track J ohn D ingle The third ranked Martlets got o ff to a slow start in Friday night's season opener at Molson Stadium. But a much stronger second half allowed them to escape w ith a 2-0 victory over the visiting Sherbrooke Vert et Or. Neither side had been able to find any rhythm or assert itself during the first frame. But the second wasa differentstory. Forward Magalie Kolker opened the scoring three minutes after the break, swinging the momentum in McGill's favour. Defender Anna Gruending put the game away in the 6 8 th minute with a fortuitous strike

from long-range.

"I think we got o ff to a nervous start," said Martlet captain Shari Fraser. "We were kicking the ball around and not really keeping it and playing our game.”

The best chance o f the first half fell to McGill in the 2 2 nd minute. A bouncing ball from a Martlet corner deflected straight to Fraser who, standing alone just outside the Sherbrooke six yard box, put her shot over the bar.

With McGill unableto capitalize,Sherbrooke grabbed the momentum and began to threaten the Martlet defence. Fraser more than made up for her earlier mistake in front o f goal with a number o f key defensive interventions that

kept the Vert et Or attackers frustrated.

At the break, Head Coach Marc Mounicot knew that his Martlets were not playing up to their capabilities.

'It's always a question for them to stay a little more composed," Mounicot said. "I think they were a little bit nervous during the first half. We were not able to keep the ball and play our normal soccer".

Cooler heads prevail The Martlets opened the second half much more composed and they were quickly rewarded with a beautiful goal which more than made up for the drab performance up to that point. Midfielder Carolyne Pelletier managed to shake o ff a defender before whipping in an inch-perfect cross for Magalie Kolker who expertly headed the ball into the top left-hand corner o f the net to put McGill ahead 1-0.

McGill doubled its lead on 6 8 minutes when a long ball pumped into the Sherbrooke area by Anna Gruending was misplayed by Sherbrooke keeper MarieMichelle Coulomb. Coulomb allowed the ,ball to bounce over her head and into the net. While clearly not as pretty as the opener, the fact that McGill had controlled play throughout the half meant it was nonetheless deserved. McGill continued to dominate the rest o f the way, maintaining possession and dictating play.

Lofty goals

Martlets blast their way to a 2-0 victory.

The game demonstrated that the Martlets have some areas which they need to work on if they hope to achieve their lofty goals for the season. Coach Mounicot singled out the relations between the midfield and the strikers as being one that needed improvement. Nevertheless, the

team recognized the importance o f opening with a win.

“It was really important," Kolker said. "We've had a lot of goals right from the preseason: We want to win every game in the league and come out first to go to Nationals being one o f the top teams. We also wanted no goals against so it was nice we had that outcome. It's good momentum."

Momentum Which these Martlets hope to continue to build on all the way to the CIS Championships in Victoria. ■

Coiffure P ie r r e

Barber 5 0 0 SHERBROOKE WEST LOTO QUEBEC BUILDING (BETWEENAYLMERANDCITYCOUNCILLORS) CALL US

( 5 1 4 ) 8 4 4 -1 8 3 7 S hampooing , ^ C ut & B lowdry ^ - * - 4

Business hours: Mon: 8:00am to 3:00 pm Tues to Fri: 8:00am to 6:00pm Saturday: 8:00 am to 3:00pm

The McGill Tribune

2 6 -S p o r ts -19.0 9 .0 6

Sports Briefs

La

C

st

COMPILED BY CHARLIE B lORE AND AARON SlGAL

all

STANDINGS Football

W

L

p

PF

PA

Rugby(W)

W

L

PF

PA

p

Rubgy (M)

W

L

PF

PA

P

Laval

2

0

4

25

21

McGill

2

0

177

0

4

McGill

2

0

121

17

4

Concordia

2

0

4

43

26

Laval

2

0

0

4

13

4

41

41

2

Sherbrooke

1

1

2

Bishop's

1

1

2

.

53

36

45

54

McGill

O

2

O

43

70

Montreal

O

2

O

32

50

Concordia

1

1

88

5

2

Ottawa

1

1

41

36

2

Bishop's

0

2

0

120

O

Sherbrooke

O

1

0

186

O

ON DECK Redmen Rugby - McGill vs. Concordia; Wednesday, 9 p.m.

I When McGill faces its cross-town rival in any sport, the game I I takes on a certain edge and heightened intensity. After Ip last year's loss in the QURL final, the Redmen are hungry for I revenge. In what has quickly emerged into a two-team league, | ] the Stingers seem to be the only challenge that wilj be offered 1 ; by the opposition this year. Expect a tight, hard-hitting affair Jj: from the tw o premier rugby programs in the province.

| ?

J |

Redmen Hockey - McGill vs. Carleton; Saturday, 7 p.m.

The OUA East Champion Redmen return to the ice on Saturday hoping to make another drive for the National Championship.

With many returnees from last year's powerhouse squad— including standout goalie Mathieu Poitras— expect the Redmen to kick o ff their season with a thum ping of Carleton.

Grab a seat on the Redmen attacking side— most o f the play should be at that end of the rink.

Redmen Lacrosse - McGill vs. McMaster; Sunday, 1 p.m.

Like rugby, lacrosse is a perennial point of pride at McGill.

And similar to rugby, the Redmen have a strong squad for the lacrosse season. Playing on Forbes Field in the Shadow of McConnell Hall, McGill should be able to hammer their opponents from the Hammer w ith steelworker-like precision.

OK, enough Hamilton jokes.

MLB - Florida Marlins at Philadelphia Phillies; Friday to Sunday While a Marlins-Phillies series may not seem like an appealing way to spend a weekend o f TV watching, the games will probably be extremely entertaining. These unlikely NL East teams are locked in a bitter dog-fight to claim the NL Wild Card spot with only three games separating the tw o teams. Being squads from the same division will only intensify what already should be some high-energy affairs.

NFL - Atlanta Falcons at New Orleans Saints; Monday, 8 :3 0 p.m. on TSN Are you ready for some football? The Falcons should win this game handily, but this clash is rife with storylines. Reggie Bush, the NFL's new wonder, makes his first appearance on Monday Night Football. Not only that, but the game will pit him against another prized NFL possession, talismanic QB Michael Vick.

The NFL also takes MNF to New Orleans, highlighting the hurricane-ravagepi city and possibly bringing the national spotlight back to its plight.

Concordia

1

0

43

Bishop's

1

2

55

Sherbrooke

1

1

23

64

2

ETS

0

3

22

14 0

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BOX SCORE Saturday_Sept.1 6 , 2 0 0 6 Laval Rouge et Or 4 3 vs. McGill Redmen Molson Stadium

27

Scoring Summary: First Quarter 03:30 MCGILL - Erik Galas 2 yd pass from Matt Connell (Robert Eeuwes kick) 10:59 MCGILL - G. Heatherington 57 yd pass from Matt Connell (Robert Eeuwes kick) 14:26 LAV - Cameron Takacs 30 yd field goal Second Quarter 03:27 LAV - P.L. Yao 58 yd run (Cameron Takacs kick) 08:45 MCGILL - Robert Eeuwes 22 yd field goal 13:11 MCGILL - Matt Connell 1 yd run (Robert Eeuwes kick) 14:05 LAV - Cameron Takacs 24 yd field goal Third Quarter 01:39 LAV - Cameron Takacs 29 yd field goal 08:25 LAV - Matthew Leblanc 21 yd pass from Benoit Groulx (Cameron Takacs kick) 13:46 LAV - P.L. Yaoi yd run (CameronTakacs kick) Fourth Quarter 05:06 LAV - Cameron Takacs 21 yd field goal 07:26 M C G ILL - Robert Eeuwes 42 yd field goal 10:23 LAV - G. B-Normand 7 yd pass from Benoit Groulx (Cameron Takacs kick) 14:44 LAV - Cameron Takacs 37 yd field goal Score by Quarters

12

Laval McGill

3 10 17 13 - 4 3 1410 o 3 -27

3

4

W o rld S e rie s !

Attendance: 1749

t h e s e . . . b u t w e d o n 't .

H ey , y o u h a v e to s ta rt so m e w h ere .

W rite rs w a n te d . C o m e to th e S p o rts S e c tio n m e e tin g o n T h u rsd ay a t 5 p m

in . t h e

T r ib u n e o ffic e ( S h a tn e r 1 1 0 ), o r e m a il u s a t s p o r ts @ m c g illtr ib u n e .c o m

Redmen hang on The Redmen soccer team maintained their top spot in the QUSL Sunday with a 1-1 draw against Université de Québec à Trois-Rivières. Striker Jamie Scholefîeld scored an early second half goal to even the score after the Patriotes had jum ped out to a 1-0 lead tw o minutes from halftime.

Scholefîeld scored his second goal in as many games in the 52nd minute o f what turned out to be a physical contest.

In all, eight cards were issued including four to McGill. The Redmen have a difficult week ahead o f them as they will play tw o games in tw o nights against Laval and Concordia on Saturday and Sunday, respectively.

Walton wins on Mount Royal McGill's Adrian Walton took the gold medal at the 2006 McGill Open, held Saturday on M ount Royal. Walton ran the 10 kilometer race in a time o f 19:25, 14 seconds ahead of his nearest rival. As a team, the Redmen finished fifth out of 10 with 123 points. In the women's race, Stephanie Magrath won bronze, completing the five kilometre course in 15:01, 21 seconds behind gold medalist Diana Purtz. The Martlets wound up finishing third in the seven team field with 70 points. Williams College from Williamston, Mass, were the overall champs, finishing first as a school in both categories.

Friday, Sept. 1 5 , 2 0 0 6 Sherbrooke Vert et Or 0 vs. McGill Martlets Molson Stadium

2

Scoring Summary

Quick Stats LAV MCGILL FIRST DOWNS.............

25 19 - 1 Rushing...............

5 22 12 Passing...............

2 2 .

Penalty...............

28 NET YARDS RUSHING..... . ’ 156 306 NET YARDS PASSING.........

409 TOTAL OFFENCE YARDS.... ... 4 6 2 437

SACK OF THE WEEK This week's winner: Roy Williams, wide receiver for the Detroit Lions.

S p o r t s w r i t e r s g o t o a ll o f

Redmen la-cross out competition Attacker Ben McBeth scored four goals and added three assists as McGill defeated Laurentian 20-2 in a non-conference men's lacrosse game in Ottawa on Saturday. Midfielder Marc Purdonand attacker Jake Safarikalso fared well, each notching themselves a hat trick. Purdon added three assists to give him a six point performance. Earlier in the day, three other members of the Redmen— Scott Bailey, Nick Moreau and Luke LaCava— also scored hat-tricks as McGill crushed Carleton 221 in the Canadian University Field Lacrosse Association regular season opener.

Score

S u p e r B o w l!

S t a n e l y C u p F in a ls !

Martlets annihilate Sherbrooke Centre Sandra Simpson scored 28 points and tied a league record for conversions as the McGill Martlets rugby team destroyed the Sherbrooke Vert et Or 98-0 at MacDonald Campus on Sunday. Simpson scored a pair o f tries and nine converts, equalling her own Quebec University Rugby League single-game record. A trio o f McGill players added three tries each, with fullback Julianne Zussman, scrum-half Melany Waring and prop Emma Kennedy all crossing iiito the end zone thrice. The win extended McGill's nine-year regular season undefeated streak to 55-0-1.

In case you missed this, Williams was quoted at the beginning of this week as saying: "It's stupid how close we were to putting 40 points on the board,” after his Lions were on the losing end of a 9-6 result against the Seattle Seahawks. Williams would go on to say of the team's upcoming game against the Chicago'Bears,"We will win this game. You all can take that as a guarantee or whatnot, but we will win this game".

You know what else is stupid Roy? Guaranteeing wins! : When has that ever worked? Athletes have tremendous pride : and even bigger egos. Attacking those, founding pillars o f a pro athlete's emotional makeup invariably draws a predictable response: A pissed off competitor who is playing with more I intensity and desire than you are.

Of course the Lions are not immune to this phenomenon and were shellacked 34-7 by the Bears. Would the Bears have won if Williams hadn't run his mouth? No one can answer that question, but judging by Chicago's quick start— 24 points in the first half— it probably didn't help.

FIRST HALF: (no scoring) SECOND HALF: 1 . McGILL: Magalie Kolker (Carolyne Pelletier), 4 8 :0 0 2 . McGILL: Anna Gruending (Eloise Vandal), 6 5 :0 0 GOALKEEPERS: McGILL: Victoria Villalba (W, 3 - 1-1 overall, 9 0 :0 0 , 0 GA, 2 saves, SHO) SHERBROOKE: Marie-Michelle Coulomb (L, 0 - 1-0 ; 9 0 :0 0 , 2 GA, 4 saves) TOTAL SHOTS: McGILL: 21 SHERBROOKE: 6 SHOTS ON GOAL: McGILL: 6 SHERBROOKE: 2

McGILL's STARTING LINEUP: GK:Vctoria Villalba DEF: Shari Fraser DEF: Morag Mitchell-Carvalho (7 0 :0 0 ) DEF: Ali Mooers DEF: Anna Gruending MID: Antonietta Pascale (6 5 :0 0 ) MID: Eloise Vandal MID: Sarah Chmielewski (8 8 :0 0 ) MID: Catherine Scott (out: 8 5 :0 0 ; in: 8 8 :0 0 ) FOR: Magalie Kolker (7 8 :0 0 ) FOR: Carolyne Pelletier (7 8 :0 0 )

VH *'*j *' - ;

Hey Frank, w ith Internet that's alw ays fast, w e can h an g o u t m ore.

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S y m p a tic o H ig h S p e e d I n t e r n e t s e rv ic e f r o m B e ll A lw a y s fa s t, w i t h o u t f r u s t r a t i n g s lo w d o w n s .1

A vailable w ith o u t a c o n tr a c t a n d a t a r e d u c e d p ric e exclusively to s tu d e n ts , S y m p a tic o â&#x20AC;&#x153; H igh S p e e d I n te r n e t se rv ic e is alw ays f a s t- e v e n d u r in g p e a k h o u rs. In sta lla tio n is q u ick, easy, a n d y o u g e t full te c h n ic a l s u p p o r t 2 4 /7 .

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V isit a Bell r e t a i l e r n e a r y o u

Service available to residential customers where technology perm its. $15 shipping fee applies w ith phone order. Offers end September 30,2006; subject to change w ithout notice and cannot be combined w ith any other offer. Early term ination fees apply for all term agreements. Taxes extra.

Other conditions apply. 1. "Always fast" and "w ith out slowdowns" apply to the access dedicated from the subscriber's modem to Bell's switching equipm ent. Speeds may vary w ith your technicalconfiguration, internet traffic, your server or other factors. 2. Available to new Sympatico subscribers.

M onthly rate is $29.95/mo for months 1-8, a savings of $120; the then current m onthly rate (now $44.95) applies thereafter. 3. No purchase necessary. The contest closes October 13,2006, at 11:59 p.m. (EOT). The contest is open to students enrolled at a recognized Canadian university, college or post secondary educational institution who reside in the province of Ontario or Quebec, have reached the age of m ajority in their province of residence at the date of entering the contest and have a valid original student card. There are 30,012 pitres w ith an approximate total value of $98,250.00 CDN. The odds of winning are based on a projection o f 30,012 participants. Actual odds depend on the number of eligible people who enter for and play the game. Winners must answer a skill-testing question. Full details at www.backtoschool.sympatk:o.ca.

Sympatico is a trade mark of Bell Canada. '*02005, VANOC, Used under license.

A s a student, w h a t inspires you to le a rn ? W h a t drives you to a p p ly y o u r k n o w led g e w ith com m itm ent a n d distinction?

Shell C a n a d a believes p a ssio n is w h a t m otivates excellence. That's w hy w e 'r e p ro u d to su p p o rt a variety o f innovative student-driven initiatives in the fields o f science a n d business.

Shell h a s g iv en $ 1 2 m illion to C a n a d ia n universities, co lleg es a n d tech n ical institutions o v e r the p a s t d e c a d e â&#x20AC;&#x201D;a n d h a s com m itted to a fu rth er $ 1 2 m illion o v e r the nex t six y e a rs .

These funds will su p p o rt ev erything from field re s e a rc h trips to student d e sig n contests. It will build student la b s a n d m ak e th e latest tech n o lo g y a c ce ssib le to g r a d u a te s a n d u n d e rg ra d u a te s .

Equally im p o rta n t is th e tim e a n d e n e rg y Shell p e o p le g iv e to students a s m entors, te a c h e rs, a d v iso rs a n d , hopefully, em p lo y ers.

A s a C a n a d ia n e n e rg y c o m p a n y com m itted to h ig h er lea rn in g a n d su sta in a b le d e v elo p m en t, o u r g o a l is sim ple: To b rin g out th e b e st in C a n a d a 's students to d a y know ing they will b e c o m e the le a d e rs o f tom orrow .