To Montreal, My Second T

it’s the only place where I can afford to impulsively shop. When I walked in one day this fall, the entire store was covered in shades of orange and yellow, in preparation for Thanksgiving. Shortly after, the store dons an outfit of red, green, and white in anticipation of North America’s most celebrated holiday: Christmas.

As I see the store changing its dress according to every (Christian) occasion, I see Montreal doing the same. The week leading up to Halloween, for example, I see everyone on the street fitted out in their best costumes, on their way to a party, or perhaps already tipsily walking back from one. All of December, I see every building ornament ed, often excessively, and hear Christmas jingles ringing in my ears. As I walk home, they haunt my already-looming fears that my brother—and room mate—has devoured that last bit of cake I left in the fridge.

But as Montreal changes its colours, I also turn blue, wallowing in a mostly unexplainable sadness. I think back to how white and green for the month of independence, or how a spirit of joy and celebration would overtake us in anticipation of Eid, or how the sky would be overtaken by colourful polka dots for Basant. See ing all these families and friends happily celebrating a holiday doesn’t make me nauseous because I’m heartless, but because my heart is mourning its own loss.

So I call my parents up and make some dal chawal and I sit in my bed kameez— sickness over me as I try the first place. Why is it that I rethink my decision twice every week, like it’s a task on my daily agenda set to ‘repeats weekly until eternity’? And then, to make myself feel better, as I’m sitting alone in my room, I tell myself that I’m probably not the only one who feels this way—because suffering in soli darity is the best antidote. Right?

In all seriousness though, with 30 per cent of the student population being international students, there’s bound to be scores of people on McGill’s campus struggling with the idea of living in a new and strange place, away from their family, away from their feeling of safety, and away from their home.

This “fish out of the water” experience often registers in the health services that students turn to in their time of need. Homesickness, therefore, is a phenomenon that’s clear to Vera Romano, Director of the Student Wellness Hub.

“A Counselling and Mental Health Benchmark study conducted in 2019 indicated that our interna tional students report higher levels of social anxiety than Canadian students,” Romano wrote in an email to the challenge for international students.”

Out of place, everywhere

When I sought out international students to talk to, I found many who had similar experiences to

An international student’s on making a home

By Mahnoor Chaudhry,

areas of Quebec, people kind of look at you weird when you either stumble through a French sentence or respond in English.” a.m., and I’ll be fine,” Horta said. “Comparing it to São Paulo, most of my friends have been robbed […] and walking home at night is something that you