Northeastern Pennsylvania Edition Volume 1 Issue 5
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Denying yourself the foods you love is a recipe for weight-loss disaster.
Finally, a plan that leaves room for the good stuff
By Joy BAUER From “THE 90/10 WEIGHT-Loss PLAN” When Lisa, a 35-year-old mother of two, came to see me, she was 45 pounds overweight. She had struggled with a weight problem her entire life, and had tried hundreds of diets since the age of 17. She was a classic “yo-yo” dieter. The problem with Lisa’s past attempts at weight loss was that all of the diet programs she had tried completely ruled out the fun, fattening foods that she loved and that her kids were always eating. By midafternoon, when she was physically exhausted and emotionally drained, she would give up and start nibbling on something “off limits”-usually her kids’ snack foods like crackers, candy or cookies. Then, feeling she’d ruined her day, Lisa would follow up a few bites of what she considered to be a “bad food” with an all-out binge. Of course she would vow to start fresh again tomorrow. This cycle-deprive, cheat, binge-would continue for a few days or even weeks, until she gave up completely.
Lisa’s struggle is a common one. A recent survey suggests only one in four overweight dieters successfully keeps the pounds off. I have met thousands of unsuccessful dieters, and time after time I see the same pattern to their failed efforts: They tried to lose weight with an eating plan that is radically different from the way they normally eat. These people are perfect candidates for what I call the 90/10 weightloss plan. I designed the plan around the timetested principles of healthy, long-term weight loss that can really work: portion control and cravings satisfaction. The idea is that each day, approximately 80% to 90% of your calories come from nutritious food, and about 10% to 20% come from delicious indulgences. Because the foods you crave and enjoy are built right into the plan along with more nutritious fare, you’ll feel satisfied both physically and emotionally. Even after you’ve reached your weight-loss goal, you can easily incorporate the 90/10 plan into your life on a regular basis, because everything your body needs and wants is part of the program. continued next page
INSIDE
When It’s Time to Talk, Say What You Really Mean!
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Start by choosing between two different barrier and finish the day with a calorie levels for weight loss-either 1400 healthy dinner. calories per day, or 1600 calories per day. If Lisa went overboard at a meal, I I’ll help you out by giving you guidelines for The guidelines that follow offer a good idea of urged her not to give up on the day how much you can cat. You’re on your own which route to choose. But be flexible: If you aren’t but simply count it as a regular meal with the fun foods-each day you can enjoy happy with your progress you can always change plus her fun food allotment. an indulgence of your choosing, up to 250 plans. Lisa and I also discussed the imporcalories of cookies, chips, cake, wine, nuts, tance of exercise. Studies show that etc. You can have your treat at any time 1400-Calorie Plan Generally, this level will work people who exercise are more likely of day whatever works best for you given well for women, especially those who do moderate to maintain their weight loss. I counexercise three to five times a week. But this is too your hunger level and cravings. sel my clients to work up to 20 to 60 It’s not about exact math. The plan is a low for the majority of men, with the exception of minutes of aerobic activity three to lifelong weight-management strategy. If guys who are under 5’5” and who lead a sedentary five times per week. you can satisfy your taste buds while diet- life. If you’re a small woman who’s inactive or over In Lisa’s case she had little or no 50 - when your metabolism is often slower - you ing, you can be a successful dieter. solo time to get to a gym, so I sugNo foods are forbidden. Instead, you learn could be a candidate for an even lower calorie gested she purchase several exercise to include all types of foods in your diet, plan. videos and play them in her living and how to recognize and eat appropriate room, encouraging her kids to jump 1600-Calorie Plan This plan is right for most men, portions. Depending on the plan you decide around with her. Other days, she and women taller that 5’6”. If you’re normally a to follow and the fun foods you choose, the hearty eater, opt for this route. could put her youngest child in the plan can range from 80% healthy and 20% stroller and take a power walk while fun to 100% healthy. her older child was in school. For everyone, I recommend a multivitamin with Here’s how the plan worked for Lisa. She 100% of the RDA, and for women, a 1200-milligram In just 14 days, Lisa had lost seven chose the 1600-calorie level. Given her calcium supplement. Finally, remember that conpounds on the 90/10 plan. After two history of binge-eating, I worried that the sistently following a food plan requires satisfaction and a half months she was 20 pounds fewer calories could leave her unsatisfied and pleasure. - J.B. thinner and looked and felt great. and likely to splurge. She decided to eat Two years later, all the extra weight her fun food in the midafternoon while her plus an additional two pounds is off. kids were snacking, since this was the time she usually craved a treat. Even more important, Lisa no longer views foods as “good” or “bad.” Feeling satisfied and confident, she would then be able to break the binge Instead, she continues to choose healthy foods about 90% of the time
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His entree could be a moderate sized steak, while satisfying her need for fun and variety the bread with lettuce, tomato and two slices of rest of the time. She’s finally found a diet she cheese-helped keep his energy level high and although I did encourage him to alternate with grilled chicken or fish to lower his cholesterol can stick with for the long haul. eliminated his afternoon headaches. Let’s look at how Steven, a 50-year-old busiTo avoid feeling ravenous at dinnertime, Ste- numbers, which were on the high side. Steven replaced his usual fat-laden baked nessman, benefited from the potato and creamed spinach with 90/10 plan. Steven was 20 a salad and plenty of steamed pounds overweight and felt vegetables. And of course, skim heavy, sluggish, unattractive You don’t have to weigh and measure foods or constantly consult calorie charts to follow this diet. By milk in his coffee instead of cream and uncomfortable in his tracking how many servings you eat, you can estimate your total calories with ease. I derived the overall nutrient breakdown of this plan by consulting the American Dietetic Association, the American Cancer and sugar. clothing. But diets didn’t fit Society, the American College of Sports Medicine and the American Heart Association: All agree that fat I persuaded him to take the stairs his on-the-run lifestyle, he should comprise roughly 30% or less of your calories, protein about 20% and carbohydrates around 50%. First, you’ll need to know what a serving is. Here are some examples: at work and to park half a mile from claimed. his office, so that he would be forced I asked him to keep a food diGrains, breads 1/2 cup rice or pasta; 1 slice bread; 1/4 to 1 cup cereal to squeeze at least a little physical ary for five days and bring it to Vegetables 1 cup leafy raw; 1/2 cup non-leafy cooked Fruits 1 medium apple, pear or banana; 1/2 cup applesauce; 15 grapes activity into each day. (That’s not our first visit. He would start Dairy 1 cup milk or plan yogurt; 1 oz. cheese; 1 1/2 oz. low fat-cheese bad for someone who swore he had the day with a mug of coffee Protein 3 oz. lean meat, poultry or fish; 1 cup beans, 6 to 8 oz. tofu no time to exercise.) laced with sugar and cream. What surprised Steven the most Lunch was a corn muffin or For each serving, figure you’re getting roughly the following number of calories: was that even with all the satisfying a bagel with cream cheese, Grains, breads 80 Dairy 90 to 150 foods to choose from, he was eating along with orange juice. No Vegetables 25 Protein 150 to 250 only 1600 calories per day, which wonder he complained of Fruit 60 to 90 Fat 45 was guaranteed to result in weight afternoon headaches and In the dairy and protein categories, shoot for foods that are low - or nonfat (or in the case of meat, loss for him. And it did-Steven lost fatigue. lean). The fat category can be puzzling, so think of it this way: If you eat a dish prepared with oil (sauteed ten pounds in 14 days and watched Then Steven would really vegetables, fried chicken) or use a spread (tsp. of butter, mayonnaies, or peanut butter, or 1 tbs. of low-fat cream cheese or salad dressing), count it as at least one fat serving. Now following your plan below. more weight come off over the gorge himself at restaurants Don’t forget that your 250-calorie fun food is in addition to the servings shown. If you choose a lowerfollowing weeks. His cholesterol several nights a week. After calorie fun food, you can tack on extra servings. levels decreased to normal and his eating virtually nothing satisFood Number of Servings blood pressure, which had been fying or nutritious all day, he 1400-calorie plan 1600-calorie plan high, decreased enough to get him was ravenous by dinner and Grains, breads 3 4 off medication. Four years later, the would typically fill up on bread Vegetables 3 3 Fruit 2 3 weight is still off. and butter, three alcoholic Dairy (low-fat choices) 1.5 2 Steven is a prime example of drinks, a large steak, a baked Protein 2 2 someone whose eating habits were potato with sour cream and Fats 2 2 Source: The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Total Nutrition so ingrained that they seemed imbutter, creamed spinach and possible to change. The 90/10 plan a piece of cake. convinced him that weight loss and Based on his size and lifeven would have a healthy, low-calorie afternoon a little self-indulgence could go hand in hand. style, the 1600 calorie plan made the most snack, and then indulge in, his fun food at dinner sense for Steven. He and I planned hearty, wellwhen he was most apt to crave it. Joy Bauer is a New York City dietitian who balanced breakfasts and lunches that were apFor Steven, that fun food might be strawberserved as the primary nutrition consultant to pealing, easy and effortless. Fruit and yogurt for ries and a dollop of whipped cream, a scoop a major eating-disorder study conducted by breakfast, for lunch a salad and soup, or a salad of vanilla ice cream with hot fudge, a small Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center. She is and sandwich such as turkey on whole-wheat piece of cake, or even a couple of extra slices also the author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to of bread. He could also consider two glasses of Total Nutrition. wine at dinner as his fun-food allowance.
Weight Loss: Quick, Easy and Fun
You h a v e an authentic voice hiding inside you, and Harriet Lerner wants to help you find it. in her new book The Dance of Connection (HarperCollins), the psychologist explains how best to talk to people when you’re mad, hurt, frustrated or betrayed. The key she says, is arguing
calmly-and using your authentic voice. When you decide you need to talk things over, consider these guidelines: Speak up only when you need to. Don’t do it because you need an apology or validation. Remember that you don’t have to address every issue; it’s an act of maturity to let some things go. Strike when the iron is cold. Intensity is contagious, so be calm. If something challenges your core beliefs and values, then strategize before you speak. Listen to understand. Don’t plan your reply.
The person you’re talking to is more likely to consider your point of view if she feels she has been heard. Practice kindness. Be kind even when the person you are talking to is less than kind to you. And never criticize someone while she is criticizing you. Draw the line. It’s okay to object if someone calls you a name in anger. Stop the conversation, and agree to revisit the issue when you’re both more relaxed. Warm things up. Don’t forget to praise the other person’s positives. Nobody values criticism if there is not first a surrounding climate of care.
Him Tarzan.
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sk Harvard psychologist and researcher Alice Domar to describe the way that men and women approach stress, and she paints a primitive picture: “If you think about it from an evolutionary standpoint, cavemen were concerned about hunting to feed themselves and their families,” says Domar, who is director of Harvard’s Mind/Body Center for Womens Health and the author of Self Nature. “Cavewomen were busy doing everything else, gathering, watching the kids, maintaining the cave.” Ever since Homo erectus first started fires, women have been largely responsible for putting them out. But as you nod your head in stress-filled agreement, know this: The busier women become, Domar says, the less likely they are to maintain critical support systems-their network of family and friends who help them manage the load. And that’s leaving them more vulnerable to the health risks associated with chronic stress. Until recently, very little research was available about women and the psychological and biological effects of balancing career and family responsibilities. But several important studies, coupled with a new book on the subject, signal a tectonic shift in our understanding of the way women keep their cool. The news, says Domar: Women and men experience and cope with stress in very different ways. When women do what comes naturally, namely, commiserating with others, they can diffuse the negative effects of stress very well (and much more efficiently than men, who tend to worry alone). And that’s a good thing, since research also shows that women stress more than men-especially during the parenting years. Domar cites a ground breaking 1998 study by Harvard sociologist Ronald Kessler and David Almeida, a psychologist at the University of Arizona. The team studied 166 couples, who kept detailed diaries of their emotions for six weeks. “Men tended to worry about their immediate family, money and work,” Almeida says. Meanwhile, women worried about those same three issues but also about a host of other concerns: Were their children doing well in school? Was their family reunion on schedule? Were their pets healthy? Their friends happy? All told, women cycled through an average of 12 stressors-four times as many as men at any given time. “This challenges the idea that women merely ruminate more and hang on to bad feelings
longer than men,” Almeida says. In fact, women feel stressed more often about more things. And at midlife, when the demands of children and work are often greatest, mothers experience the most stress of any group or combination of groups. Technically, stress is defined by a change in body chemistry. We know it as our reaction to danger, a perceived threat or life challenges that can range from rocky relationships to demands at work. Stress isn’t all bad, either. It motivates us to get out of bed and, ultimately, stay alive. But for working mothers, who often fill several social roles, the levels can become extreme and have serious consequences. Chronic stress can suppress immune function and may make women more susceptible to depression, coronary artery disease, heart disease and cancer, as well as a host of other conditions. Fortunately, women are coping machines by design. Two years ago a team of UCLA psychologists released a controversial study that concluded that women typically undergo a different response to acute stress than was previously thought. For decades, behavioral specialists believed that humans and many other animals of both sexes reacted to acute stress with a “fight or flight” response, in which the body prepares for either aggression or a quick getaway. The UCLA study argues that women and females of many other species “tend and befriend” instead. When stress mounts, women are more prone to protect and nurture their loved ones and rely on social networks of other females for support in their efforts. As fundamental as its results may seem, the study almost didn’t get published, says Shelley Taylor, the lead researcher on the project and author of a new book, The Tending Instinct (Times Books). A reviewer with the journal Psychological Review felt that the results might be wrongly interpreted as a justification for restricting women to traditional roles of hearth and home, Taylor says. But the journal eventually published her findings, and Taylor insists most people now understand that the message is actually one of empowerment. “The tending pattern probably developed because women were working at the same time they were gathering,” she says. “So they had to form these social networks to protect their children while they were out and about.” Taylor says the tend-and-befriend response has a physiological basis in the hormone oxytocin, which is secreted at high levels during childbirth and has a calming effect. It is also triggered in both sexes by stress, but while the female sex hormone estrogen seems to amplify oxytocin’s calming effect, the male sex hormone androgen dampens it. That’s one reason why men are more likely to deal with anxiety by lashing out in violence, Taylor says. Or they withdraw, which helps explain why alcohol and drug abuse are more common among men than women. Eventually, men do get around to sharing their stresses. And when they do, who are they most likely to turn to? Their wives, of course. When you factor in the demands on modern-day working mothers, millions of whom have streamed into the workforce in the last three decades, the natural order can break down fast. Every commitment competes for time that women don’t seem to have, so spending it with friends can seem like a luxury. And that has experts like Domar worried. “Our society has changed more in thirty years than at any other time in human history, and this pattern of self-denial has got to end,” she says. “It’s a matter of role modeling for our kids.” It’s a matter of survival.
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3. Keep Things Simple: Only buy gifts for people you really want to. (Most of us have too much stuff already.) Eighty percent of what I get ends up in the charity box, or I give it away as a gift to someone else. Insist on pulling names if you attend large family gatherings, and then donate to that person’s favorite charity or cause. I just know that we put ourselves under unnecessary stress at the holiday season. One real important bit of advice is to learn to say, “NO!” 4. Exercise!: When I get stressed during the holidays, I run to the Jazzercise Fitness Center! It reduces stress tremendously, and it only takes an hour out of my day. Then I feel refreshed and relaxed before I begin cooking and cleaning for my guests.
S
taying sane for the holidays is no easy task. With the kids out of school and five guests staying for a week (not including the extra 10 coming for dinner this year), finding time to relax takes a bit more effort than you might have realized. Get advice from our members on getting ready for the holidays -- without driving yourself crazy. 1. Make Time for Yourself: I think the most important way to reduce stress is to make sure you create time for yourself. The next important thing is to realize that a Martha Stewart Christmas is fantasy for anyone without an unlimited budget, a myriad of advertisement assistants and no children underfoot. Go with the flow and enjoy even the mishaps -- you will laugh about them in the future. 2. Have an Open House: I have a holiday open house every year. I used to spend an incredible amount of time and money on entertaining because I love to cook for people. One year I just didn’t have the resources and asked everyone to bring a dish. I still prepared a few special dishes, but the stress, time and financial burden were dramatically lessened. I also buy a few Christmas jars or tins and send everyone home with a gift of cookies from the ones I baked for the party.
5. Take a Day Off: I always take at least one day off work to give myself extra time for all the preparations, and I do things in advance when I can. I usually address my Christmas card envelopes in September or October. That helps free up the necessary time to make my own cards -- something else I love to do! 6. Plan Ahead: I plan ahead when hosting a holiday party or dinner. I make sure I have lots of candles and festive decorations around the house to set the mood. I make what I can a few days in advance and then reheat on the day it’s needed. You’d be surprised what you can do when you spread it out over a few days instead of a few hours! I start making lists about a month ahead and begin scouting the grocery stores for sales on the items I’ll need. I’ll even wash the china, check the silver and prepare cold appetizer trays a day or two before the event. 7. Find a Relaxing Moment: I take a bath when everyone starts driving me crazy. I tell my husband that I need some “alone time,” then light a candle, jump into a bath full of lavender salts and close my eyes. I always feel like I can handle demanding guests if I allow myself to have that relaxing moment.
HappyHolidays!
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