Bereavement in Obstetrics and Social Media

Bereavement in Obstetrics and Social Media Social media is the easiest way to share your life with your family and friends, and in some cases, complete strangers. It’s the perfect opportunity to make your life seem exactly how you want it to be. Pregnancy announcements are often made on social media, even more now with the trends of ‘gender reveal’ parties and baby showers spreading across the world. It can become almost like a competition, especially for somebody who isn’t in a good mental state.

Who had the cutest baby shower? Who had the most creative/funny/unique gender-reveal? When is it considered too far? You may be familiar with the story that hit the news about a gender-reveal gone wrong. A homemade device that was supposed to release a colourful powder (pink or blue) exploded, “like a pipe-bomb”, and tragically caused the death of a 56-year-old woman.

Bereavement in obstetrics is a tough topic to share on social media, therefore, there is a lack of awareness on the subject. The excitement to share pregnancy news, and the many congratulations that follow, could make it very difficult if the worst were to happen. Sadly, miscarriages are actually very common. You could argue that losing a baby in such a ‘public’ way could at least mean it’s out in the open and you have people to talk to. However, the other side of the argument is that it can emphasise any feelings of failure that come with a miscarriage. Of course, anybody experiencing a miscarriage should not feel like a failure – it’s not their fault; no matter how often it is said, this doesn’t stop those negative feelings making their way in.

There is another side to all of this – those who are struggling to conceive. They too, are bombarded with other peoples’ gender reveals and baby showers, scan photos and newborn shoots. Some couples are trying for many years before they conceive, and depending on the reasons they had difficulty conceiving, there may be a higher risk of miscarriage. All miscarriages are heart-breaking for those involved, but the power to make it less-so is in our hands.

We have the right to share our lives and our news with the world, but do we need to share everything online? Sharing good news in person is rewarding, even more exciting, and it is also very mindful of others. The best we can do is try to be mindful of what others may be experiencing.