Movie Manners Go MIA Tribute Bands e We’d Like to Se
AUG. 6, 2009 - AUG. 19, 2009
Enter the Mad, Mad World of Author
Nick Belardes
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E D I TO R ’ S N OT E ick Belardes and I are bonafide media freaks. In conversation, we usually have so much information to share, we never let each other finish a thought! The first time we were introduced was via his blog 'Paperback Writer' in '05. I was living in LA at the time, so I always looked for news from back home. I somehow stumbled upon his blog while surfing the web. No one I knew had any idea who this “Nick guy” was, other than he was writing about the Bakersfield arts scene. It wasn't long before we began exchanging e-mails, and becoming "media" colleagues - even before either of us worked for the media. With the exception of a few others, Nick was really one of first local “power bloggers” who got people to read what he had to say - everyday. It bounced from art to the social scene, to who knows what? You either wanted to hit this guy, defend him, or laugh along with all the heated exchanges between him and his critics. Sometimes it got really hot. Remember the Jimmy Holiday incident? Or Enrique "Queen of The Downtown Fur"? It was out of hand just the way everyone liked it! With those crazy days behind him, Nick's ready to go national with his bizarro new book, "Random Obsessions". Read his story on page 8 and make plans to meet him at one of his upcoming book tour party stops. Or log-on to www.bakotopia.com for a chance to win a free signed copy! Congratulations, Nick! Shots are on you, woohoo! Thanks to all of this week's contributors and advertisers for keeping Bakotopia free for you and yours.
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August 6, 2009
Korner
Radio’s Funky Familyhood Miranda opens up about her beloved brothers in radio - Meathead and Francis from KRAB morning show. By Miranda & Francis/KRAB, Bakotopia.com contributors orking for KRAB Radio has proven to me that you should never underestimate your coworkers. While there may be times I feel like a den mother for a troupe of 30year-old Cub Scouts, I have learned that when push comes to shove the boys deliver in a way that makes the KRAB Morning Show unforgettable. If you want a behind-the-scenes look at the morning lifestyle I can’t deliver. What I can give you is a little insight into life with my fellow morning show co-defendants, Meathead and Francis. To know what it’s like to work with Meathead and Francis, you must know the men behind the characters. Meathead is a large, sweaty, tattooed teddy bear that is adored by women and comic-book enthusiasts alike. He has taken his knack for entertainment beyond the radio and can be seen on and behind-thescenes of many Bakersfield events including the Thunder Run, the upcoming Funhouse Rock Fest on Aug. 15 at The Dome, and anything involving a bikini or Jell-O wrestling contest. While I don’t like to use the term hippie to describe Francis, he is a bearded and ponytailed bicy-
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Francis PHOTOS BY JOSEPH GOMEZ
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cle rider that has turned his suburban plot of land into a working farm complete with chickens. Francis has also cancelled his cable, leaving his family beholden to the Xbox 360 and its profitable venture with Netflix. To put these two men in the same room together for hours at a time seems to be more of an experiment for science than the formula for a good morning rock show, but I would like to think that we have defied the odds. Besides, in a world full of Michael Jacksons, Lindsey Lohans and John and Kate Plus 8s, it is hard not to come up with a sarcastic comment or a tasteless joke. If you are a listener of the show, you know that ruthless sarcasm and an extreme lack of taste is our bread and butter. Do I recommend working with Meathead and Francis? Sure, if you don’t mind granola, the Green Lantern and an endless string of terrible pickup lines. As for what it’s like to work with Miranda? I am perfect in every way. Don’t argue with me, I will hurt you. wwwkrab.com -------------------------------------------------
3. Francis: T minus 4 minutes 25 seconds. (KEY: T = 5 a.m. or start of the show!)
Funky Factoids about KRAB Staff:
Most “Consultations” with Clear Channel Legal
Order of studio arrival in the morning:
1. Francis: 15 (2nd tour) 2. Francis: 13 (1st tour) 3. Meathead: 9
Daily Coffee Consumption by KRAB Staff Member 1. Far and away Danny Spanks: 2 + pots a day plus energy drinks and Dr. Pepper 2. Miranda Whitworth: 1 + pot, I get here at 4 am! 3. Robin: 1 + pot. Peace out b****es! 4. Meathead: Less than 1 pot, but it's a coffee / hot chocolate hybrid. 5. Francis: Really prefers a Cherry Coke first thing in the morning. 6. Bruce Wayne: If this was about LIQUID consumption Bruce would win hands down.
Morning Show Favs! (Current Bands) 1. Francis: Blue October, Taking Back Sunday, and Silversun Pickups. 2. Meathead: Rise Against, Offspring and I Hate Kate. 3. Miranda: The Killers, Incubus and The Foo Fighters.
1. Miranda: T minus one hour. 2. Meathead: T minus 20 minutes.
Meathead Miranda
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August 6, 2009
There in a
Nano second Local artist is ready make some serious moves!
From far left: An MJ inspired design by Nano, the artist at work inside The Basement Gallery in downtown Bakersfield. COURTESY PHOTOS
By Greg Goodsell, Bakotopia.com contributor ano Rubio is a very soft-spoken young man who has made some important strides on the local Bakersfield art scene in a relatively brief time. While he has been creating art from a very early age, his first real showing was as recent as 2006, when he impressed many with his oil painting of “Gollum” from the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Rubio cites former Bakersfield art instigator A. S. Ashley as inspiring him to share his work with the public. I've been doing art ever since I was a kid. I got into showing my work when I met A. S. Ashley, I started doing graphics for him, and I began paintings to show in the shows that he used to do,” Rubio says. Rubio has since lent his talents to doing layout and paste-up for the late, lamented Random Times newspaper and has contributed several important pieces to local art shows. His first solo show, “There Will Be Paint” is currently at the Empty Space Theater. One piece in particular caught this reviewer's eye. Against a stark blackand-white industrial backdrop, two
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bizarre creatures, reminiscent of the ones found in the classic B-picture Attack of the Giant Leeches (1957) lurk in the foreground. As expected, there is a fascinating story behind the artwork. “My girlfriend, Theresa Tate, she works with special needs kids. She brought home this drawing that this kid had done, and they're really detailed. They have a story for everything, everything was colored in the lines, and it's really interesting. I got some of the images from that, and it really reminded me of the images that I used to do as a kid. I tried to mix that with some 'mature' drawing …. Things that I remember, it contains all that,” Rubio explains. Many of Rubio's pieces involved mixed media and collage. “When I do my art, it's kind of jumbled. I have to do it the way I think. I like to put in a lot of my processes, stuff like that.” Rubio has since earned a scholarship from the Arts Council of Kern and is excited about attending Claremont College in the fall. Visit Nano at Bakotopia!: www.bakotopia.com/users/NANO13 BAKOTOPIA 5
BAKOBIT from Bakotopia.com
August 6, 2009
Missing Movie
Manners
The wonders of daily common courtesy ... try it sometime!
By Jordan Russell Bakotopia.com contributor ecently I’ve grown increasingly disturbed by people’s lack of manners these days. The other day is a prime example of this. So I pay $10.50 (yes, it’s $10.50 now) to get into a movie, and I sit myself down in the seats. The movie previews are already over by now, so I silence my cell phone. It’s a pretty intense and scary movie, from what I had heard, so I began preparing for ways to play it off like I didn’t just jump five feet out of my chair. About half of the movie goes by, and I’m so enthralled that I forget about anything’s existence but the movie. Just as an intense part comes, a guy roughly 20 years old decides it’d be cool to answer his phone like he’s in the middle of a warzone. Believe it or not, guy, I don’t enjoy hearing about your commentary on the movie to your friend while I’m watching said movie. Not only was he extremely loud, but his phone resembled a searchlight. If I remember correctly, I’m in a movie; not trying to escape the Cave of Wonders. So of course, my focus was completely turned to this person, and from then on, all I could think about is what I
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wanted to throw at the back of his head. Why didn’t the guy just ignore the call? Why did he choose to stay on the phone for about 5 minutes? Why does the person he’s talking to need to be informed - through a series of profanities - that someone just got decapitated? With technology advancing more and more rapidly, it seems that it is directly proportional to declining manners. In my opinion, people spend too much of their time with their gadgets, and too little time is being spent actually interacting
with other human beings. The less people interact with one another, the worse they become at it. It’s a downward spiral. Common courtesies seem like a stretch nowadays. Technology isn’t the only culprit of this decline of manners though. It seems that parents aren’t teaching their kids manners in their childhood either. The other day I saw a kid throwing a fit over not getting the food that he wanted. I gave a courtesy smile at the parent (me and this parent are close) and asked what she was going to do about it. She said
“he’s just a kid.” I couldn’t believe the kid wasn’t going to be punished in the slightest way for his defiant and outrageous behavior. Without discipline how is the kid going to cope with things later on in life? Where is he or she going to learn basic manners? It’s not going to fall out of the sky. While I’m not meaning to sound like a bitter old man, it’s hard not to when we, the young whippersnappers, are absent of common manners. In an on-demand world, everyone feels entitled to be pleased and taken care of that very instant, and in the process simple “thank-you’s” and “yes, please’s” get lost into the atmosphere. While I’m no expert in social etiquette (in fact social awkwardness seems to be my expertise), I can still manage to show some respect towards others. There are simple actions to take that can make a huge difference in someone’s day; a simple smile, a common courtesy, silencing your cell phone, apologizing for any behavior that may have seemed rude, and etc. So, the next time you feel your phone vibrating in your pocket during a movie, go ahead and answer it - but I can’t guarantee the safety of your dome.
BAKOBIT from Bakotopia.com
August 6, 2009
How to get your stuff in Bakotopia Magazine Follow these steps and you are in - it’s so easy! Best local promotion in town! By Matt Munoz Bakotopia Editor
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Follow these steps and you are in, it’s so easy! YOU BECOME THE MEDIA! The web is buzzing with good stories and blogs about everyday life in Bakersfield and the surrounding areas, and readers want you to share! 1) Get your ideas together: a story, event, photos, band, show, food review ANYTHING FLOATING AROUND YOUR MIND & COMMUNITY IS COOL! 2) Start writing to your heart’s content! 3) 400-500 words will do, but if you’re on a roll, keep writing, or if it’s short and sweet, go ahead and submit it online or via e-mail! 4) Don’t worry about being the best writer out there - we’ll help you with editing. 5) Make sure to include a high-res photo or graphic to accompany your piece. If you don't have one, we'll find one for you!
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Lord of Trivia Local author breaks into the national literary scene with some help from the strange and unusual in “Random Obsessions” By Matt Munoz Bakotopia.com Editor eave it to the chaotic imagination of Nick Belardes to find a way … Colorful, funny and always controversial, the writings of this local advocate of the literary arts are about to invade a bookstore near you. It was bound to happen. Belardes is not the type of writer who will take “no way” for an answer, just try him. Over the past four years he’s angered as many people as he has made them laugh as one of a handful of Bakersfield residents who’ve harnessed the power of the personal Web blog. Following his original “Paperback Writer” blog in 2005, his novel “Lords Part One,” attempts at Web news reporting (including his current venture, Face News,) and his brand new trivia book, titled “Random Obsessions,” out on Viva Editions, Belardes is back to books. “I wrote this book (“Random Obsessions”) in about a month and a half,” Belardes smiled. “I kicked ass.” For fans of trivia and bathroom reading, “Random Obsessions” is 258 pages of facts, and funky frolic. It may not be what you’d expect from the author of “Lords,” a creepfest that claims to be the most “controversial work of fiction to come out of the Southern San Joaquin Valley,” but it does pack its share of the peculiar. Let’s start with some of the book’s chapters “Unnatural Sciences,” “Odd Occupations,” and “Saturday Night Fever?” Each section is filled with brief blasts of information everyone with an appreciation for the odd can enjoy. Similar to the ever-popular, “Uncle John's Bathroom Reader” series found at many a friend's latrine, “Obsessions,” also features interviews with various characters associated with the book.
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“This book has interviews that other trivia books don’t,” explained Belardes, 40, on gathering info when creating his latest monster. “And I interviewed some really strange people.” Take for example, photographer/author Andrew Colvin, who claims to have a photo with the legendary “Mothman” of Virginia - a ghostly winged monster/prophet of doom. You may remember the 2002 movie dud, “The Mothman Prophecies,” starring Richard Gere. Belardes managed to dig up some strange coincidences connected to the Mothman phenomenon, including some deaths. Coincidence or not - forget Big Foot, that hairy lug is old news compared to ol’ Mothy. And that’s just the beginning. What about people who suffer from “Alice In Wonderland” syndrome, a depth-perception ailment where sufferers often see themselves stretching, or the “UK teddy bear space program?” Oh, it gets better - try the lady who travelled to the farthest reaches of Fiji. Not only did she bask in nature, but also had a quaint ‘woman-to-woman’ conversation about cannibal culture with a native in the area! Wouldn’t you like to have sat in on that exchange? “Ooooh girl, when she found him flirting, guess what she cut off and cooked first?” It’s enough to make you want to throw on your Indiana Jones’ fedora and leap into action - a state of mind Belardes feels at home with being a quiet kid from Northern California. “My childhood was filled with adventure stories. I had a lot of maps, and exploratory interests,” he said. “My dad used to bring home comic books and novels from swap meets, and I was attracted to them right away. I remember reading, “Back To The Stone Age,” by Edgar Rice Burroughs. I saw the cover with the saber-toothed tiger. After I read it, I wanted more novels like that. I loved dinosaurs …”
Growing up, Belardes admired his late father Abraham’s adventurous life as a truck driver and laborer, but growing up wasn’t easy. After awhile, our conversation shifts to his childhood. Sharing stories about his father’s puppeteer days in San Jose, where the family lived, his late mother Sherry’s difficult youth, being the youngest boy after older siblings Tom and Cathy, and the re-locating … It’s no wonder his imagination is triggered when he needs it the most. “When I was a kid in San Jose, my parents would place me in programs with mentally gifted kids. My dad was always on the road, and my mom was a housewife who read a lot,” he said. When we came to Bakersfield in ‘76, we landed right in the rough part of East Bakersfield. I was kept out of school for three months. Then I had trouble fitting in as the new kid and because of my parents being so wary of our south Bakersfield neighborhood. They wouldn’t even let me ride the bus to a gifted program. I ended up being very sheltered. We didn’t have many friends.” But where he lacked friends, he filled the void by being creative. “I became an artist in many different ways - I read a lot, worked with clay, and when I was at Emerson Jr. High, I began doodling. Art classes were no big deal to me. I read Archie, Sgt. Rock and MAD Magazine. Goofy, cartoonish art from outer space … ” he laughed. Artist Sergio Aragones (famous for his illustrations in MAD,) soon became a big influence on a young Belardes. “I had a big map of the U.S. made by Aragones on my wall and I used to look at it all the time,” he said. “I loved maps - Disneyland’s Adventureland, anything with theme parks.” Entering South High School, Nick’s interest in writing began to sprout. But it was during his college days at Bakersfield College as an art major that he felt free to explore more of his interests. It was also during this time he married and became a father to sons, Jordan and Landen. Due to responsibilities, he took a break from school to tend to family duties and worked in factories. “I bounced from art to writing and back all the time when I was at BC,” he said. Re-entering BC as a history major, life changes continued. After completing the CSUB master’s coursework in history, Belardes began travelling around the U.S. with an area full of urban legends in Ohio known as Helltown as a familiar destination. “I consider the ‘90s to be my formative writing years,” he explained. “In ‘96 I knew exactly where my life was going. After my second trip to Helltown in ‘98, that’s when I decided I wanted a job as a creative writer.” From there, the story becomes another mix of jobs and dreams. After a stint as the storyboard artist/creative writer for the Fremont Street Experience in Vegas, Belardes stayed closed to his sons by driving the lengthy trip to Bakersfield and back. Then, like many former Bakersfield residents - he was suddenly single and moved back to Bako to work and be a full-time father. Belardes stops to give credit to two key writing mentors from his college years. “Professors Oliver Rink and John Arthur Maynard from CSUB, helped me in so many ways - learning about early exploration in America and the counter-
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COVER & STORY PHOTOS BY JOSEPH GOMEZ / ADDITIONA
August 6, 2009
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culture - Jack Kerouac once spent around three months living with farm workers in the Central Valley. My writing early on was not very good. I pretty much had to teach myself how to write, and became obsessed with it.” Back to the present, local blogosphere beginnings - and “Lords Part One”… Yes, Belardes had reached some goals, completing some early writing projects (“Citrus Girl,” “Thick White Crust,” etc…) along the way. Some saw the light of day, others remain in the vault or works in progress. Around ‘03, Belardes received a phone call from Maynard, his old CSUB professor, who told him about a lengthy investigative piece, local journalist Robert Price had written about the mysterious “Lords of Bakersfield.” The story dealt with a secret underground society of prominent business men who preyed on young boys and had wild parties. The story was similar to the Hellfire Club, rumored to boast famous historical figures like Ben Franklin, and others from the period. “Dr. Maynard told me all about those articles in the Californian,” he said. “Maynard was on fire with curiosity.” Belardes soon went to work on his own fictional version of Price’s “Lords” story with different plot lines and mystery. Although the original “Lords” story sounds like an urban myth for the ages - it was enough to put Belardes to the task with backing from his writing agent, Don Ackland. In true imaginative marketing fashion, he created his own mythos surrounding his big project to make a splash. Now, all he had to do was drum up interest - enter the age of internet marketing. Unfortunately, tragedy soon struck. His agent Don Ackland dies suddenly in a car wreck. This left Belardes all alone with his plan. There was only one choice on the table where he could get immediate results - to put the book out himself, but how? “After my agent died in ‘05, I went to the Web. I thought about blogging along with an idea to start a publishing company, Noveltown, but people thought blogging was a dumb idea,” he said of testing new media still experiencing growing pains. “I was an introvert, but blogging made people think I was an extrovert.” After a year at the helm of his “Paperback Writer” blog, Belardes’ local online exploits helped spread his name and gather fans and enemies. One day, you might read a story on a local band he admired, easily gaining favor in Bakersfield. The next, a critique of a local art show he didn’t necessarily enjoy. Little did he know the power he possessed, which always ended with a crafty plug for, “My upcoming controversial novel, Lords Part One coming soon!” “Lords Part One” was finally released in October 2005 and although success was minimal nationally, it still stands as a powerful testament to the spirit of self-publishing. To this day, “Lords” lore continues to live on in Bakers-
/ ADDITIONAL COVER ART BY NICK BELARDES
field - with plans for an upcoming indie film based on interviews about the Lords of Bakersfield. You can even see a teaser trailer on MySpace, reminiscent of the Blair Witch Project. “It was hard work learning how to promote with “Lords” and Noveltown,” he admitted. “Mark Twain and Beatrix Potter also published this way.” Belardes has always been a familiar face among Central Valley writing circles attending workshops, and making connections. During the Yosemite Writer's Conference in ‘06, he met Brenda Knight with Viva Editions, a division of Cleis Press publishing. Known more for gay and lesbian erotica, the Viva Editions division of Cleis approached Belardes about writing a book of trivia for their mainstream line-up. “Viva approached me about writing something bizarre and fascinating,” he said. “They knew I was a history professor.” A deal was soon reached and off he went in search of every wild tidbit he could find. “I would go to CSUB, grab about 30 to 50 books and pile them on a desk along with my laptop - which got killed in the process,” he laughed. “It became an all day thing. I had to speed read, visit Internet sites, and make sure facts were accurate.” Praising his copy editor, the result is “Random Obsessions” out now and available
at every major book selling chain including Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble, and Borders. There are plans for a book tour all over California, starting with a big local celebration on Saturday, Aug. 22, at Borders Books, 4980 Stockdale Highway, at 2 p.m. There will be a signing and entertainment courtesy of local musicians and fellow authors from L.A. (D.R. Haney), and Hollywood (Rich Ferguson). A smaller show is set for 2 p.m. Aug. 29 at Barnes & Noble in Bakersfield as well. After the promotion hoopla is over, Belardes plans on continuing his literary crusade with some help from the exposure he’ll receive from “Random Obsessions.” And like a true evangelist - minus the cheesy suit and grin, he’s always ready to share a bit of wisdom with those who’ll listen. “The imagination is a gift,” he said. “But not everyone can wield it in a successful way.”
www.nickbelardes.com
BAKOTOPIA 9
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August 6, 2009
AGENDA WHAT’S ON IT B
= Highly recommended
AUG. 6
8 p.m. / 21+ / 852-0493
Karaoke (Every Thurs. & Sun.) The Belvedere 3090 Brundage Ln. 9 p.m. / 21+ / 325-2139
AUG. 7
Last Comic Standing’s Jay London - LIVE The Nile, 1721 19th St. 8 p.m. / 21+ / $15-$20 332-8804 BSWS, Rust Belt Lights & United Underground Jerry’s Pizza, 1817 Chester Ave. 6 p.m. / All Ages Reggae Thursday's “Dub Seeds” (every Thurs.) Camino Real Restaurant 3500 Truxtun Ave.
Spider Baby - The Musical The Empty Space 706 Oak St. 8 p.m. / $10 / 327-9493 Comedian “Gallagher” LIVE! The Crystal Palace 3233 Buck Owens Blvd. $37 - $27 7 p.m. / All Ages / 322-5200 Dave Alvin & The Guilty Women Fishlips,1517 18th St. 9 p.m. / 21+ / $20
1989, Sleepwell Darling, Shane Michaels and more. The Dome 2201 V St. 6 p.m. / $8 / All Ages
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Crosby Tyler LIVE! Mama Hillybeans 426 E. Tehachapi Blvd. 7 p.m. / $10 / 822-BEAN
Derby Revolution Roller Derby (2 BOUTS!) Rollerama, 1004 34th St. 6 p.m. & 7:15pm $12 - $15 - $5 www.derbyrevolution.com
AUG. 9
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Really Big Midgetz (also Sat.) The Belvedere 3090 Brundage Ln. 9 p.m. / 21+ / 325-2139 Suffokate, Knights of The Abyss and more The Dome, 2201 V St. 6 p.m. / $10 / All Ages
“Dog Sees God” BCT Playhouse 2400 S. Chester Ave. 8 p.m. / $12: adults $10: students & seniors 831-8114
Refresh Rhyme Scheme “Spoken Word Night” The Basement Gallery 1532 19th St. 8 p.m. / Free / All Ages
“Hip-Hop Night” w/ Lethal Lungs, Natty Movement and more… Jerry’s Pizza, 1817 Chester Ave. 9 p.m. / $5 / All Ages
AUG. 8
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Mento Buru’s “15 Crucial Traxx” GIGANTE CD Release Party! w/ Mezcal & DJ Noe G FOLLOW US ON TWITTER! TWITTER.COM/BAKOTOPIA Fishlips, 1517 18th St. 9 p.m. / 21+ / $5 IT’S MANIC, BABE! 324-2557 - RESERVATIONS!
DO IT LEGALLY
“Spider Baby - The Musical” The Empty Space 706 Oak St. 8 p.m. / $10 / 327-9493
“Rock The Bells 2009” w/ NAS, La Coka Nostra, EPMD and more! San Manuel Amphitheater San Bernardino, CA. www.livenation.com
Bakersfield Country Museum Annual Fundraiser Music & more! Trout’s, 805 N. Chester Ave. 1 p.m. / 21+ / 399-6700 The Modern Jazz Trio w/ David Baron Stevens The Basement Gallery 1532 19th St. 7 p.m. / 21+ / 900-9887 $5 if you mention 'Bakotopia' “Dog Sees God” BCT Playhouse 2400 S. Chester Ave. 8 p.m. / $12: adults $10: students & seniors 831-8114
AUG. 10 Alisa’s Karaoke Nation (Every Mon.) Riley's Tavern, 1523 19th St. 9 p.m. / 21+ / 324-3268
Wild West $10 OF F w
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Trout’s Nightclub ~ 7 Days a Week (399-6700) Lone Oak Lounge ~ Tue. & Thur. 8pm-1am Le Corusse Rouge ~ Tue. 8pm-Midnight The Wright Place ~ thur. 8pm-midnight Esquire Lounge ~ SAT. 8pm-1am 2507 S. Chester Ave.
661-343-5602
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SPOTLIGHT
THURSDAY, AUG. 13 2 LIVE CREW - LIVE! w/ DJ Mikey & Dirty Politicians Fishlips, 1517 18th St. 9 p.m. / 21+ / $15 324-2557 - Fishlips
www.vallitix.com 322-5200 - Vallitix
AUG. 14
“Oakland Raiders Football” Bksfld. Booster Club Mtg. Cross Roads Pizza 4200 Stine Rd. 6 p.m. / 588-8441
“Dog Sees God” BCT Playhouse 2400 S. Chester Ave. 8 p.m. / $12: adults $10: students & seniors 831-8114
AUG. 13 “Oakland Raiders Fan Club” Pre-Season Opening Game! Cross Roads Pizza 4200 Stine Rd. 6 p.m. / 588-8441
AUG. 15 “Meathead’s Funhouse Rockfest & Rockin’ Rave”! 16 Live Local Bands! Bands: 1 p.m. - 8 p.m. Rave: 9 p.m. - ? $20/ $10 with “golden ticket” www.funhouserockfest.com For info and band line-up!
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AUG. 11
Mac Attack’s Karaoke (Every Tues. & Wed.) The Junction 2620 Buck Owens Blvd. 8 p.m. / 21+ / 327-9651
Divided Highway (also Sat.) The Belvedere 3090 Brundage Ln. 9 p.m. / 21+ / 325-2139
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“Dog Sees God” BCT Playhouse 2400 S. Chester Ave. 8 p.m. / $12: adults $10: students & seniors 831-8114 ALSO SUN. AT 2PM!
AUG. 21
Silo Rags - LIVE! Mama Hillybeans 426 E. Tehachapi Blvd. 7 p.m. / $15 / 822-BEAN
AUG. 22
AUG. 16
John Anderson - LIVE! The Crystal Palace 3233 Buck Owens Blvd. $31 - $21 6:30 & 9:30 p.m. / 322-5200
“Micro Midget Wrestling” Fishlips 1517 18th St. 7 p.m. / $20 Adv - $25 Door 324-2557
Abigail Williams Abysmal Dawn and more Jerry’s Pizza 1817 Chester Ave 6 p.m. / All Ages www.timgardeapresents.com
“Hip-Hop Night” w/ C-Rayz Walz, and more. The Basement Gallery 1532 19th St. 9 p.m. / $10 / All Ages
AUG. 19
Stephanie Bettman & Luke Halpin Mama Hillybeans 426 E. Tehachapi Blvd. 7 pm / $12-$15 / 822-BEAN
“Krotch Summer Jam” w/ Rocky Nash and R.A.O. Le Corruse Rouge 4647 White Ln. 7:30 p.m. / 21+ / 21+
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“The Player’s Ball” w/ Too Short - LIVE! The Nile Bar, 1721 19th St. 8 p.m. / 21+ / $30 322-5200 / VALLITIX.COM
NL Belardes’ “Random Obsessions” Book Release Bash! Border Books 4980 Stockdale Hwy. 2 p.m. / 328-9800 Mento Buru “15 Crucial Traxx” CD Release Party 3! w/ DJ Mikey BRyder’s 7401 White Ln. 9 p.m. / 21+ / $5 397-7304
VANS Warped Tour 2009! w/ NOFX, Millionaires, Jeffree Star, and MORE! Save Mart Center 2650 E. Shaw. Fresno, CA 11 a.m. / All Ages /$33.25 www.ticketmaster.com
ENTER TO WIN FREE TIX TO THE VANS WARPED TOUR IN FRESNO ON AUGUST 19TH! VISIT: WWW.BAKOTOPIA.COM TO ENTER NOW!
MYSPACE.COM/BAKOTOPIA
DON’T DRINK & DRIVE!
BAKOTOPIA 11
BAKOBIT from Bakotopia.com
August 06, 2009
SEEN ON
SCENE
Bakotopia.com/seen
See more photos at:
THE
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Velorio, The Natural Movement, and Likhy2, July 25 at Sandrini’s PHOTOS BY DAVID KARNOWSKI
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BAKOBIT from Bakotopia.com
August 6, 2009
Rock The Bells 2009 The greatest hip-hop festival in the world returns and reunites Aug. 8 & 9.
Top: NAS and Damien Marley
By DJ Mikey, Bakotopia.com contributor
Reflection Eternal, legends EPMD, Big Boi from Outkast, Busta Rhymes, Common, the Roots, Cypress Hill and Damien Marley along side NAS performing off their up coming album “Distant Relatives” will all be blessing the mic this year. RTB is also known for surprise acts and reuniting artists like The Pharcyde to perform once again. This year, Everlast, Danny Boy and DJ Lethal are back together as House of Pain. Alongside the Irish hip hoppers, who taught us how to “Jump Around,” are Ill Bill and rapper Slaine together as La Coka Nostra. With their debut album called, “A Brand You Can Trust,” as the current No. 6 most popular rap album in the country, be prepared for some hardcore, punk rock, and rap. General admission and VIP tickets are still available at Ticketmaster.com. VIP includes a festival T shirt, backpack, meet and greets, and much more. Peep out lacokanostra.com for group info. Their new album, “A Brand You Can Trust,” is in stores now. Check out www.rockthebells.com for set times and a full artist lineup.
hen it comes to true Hip Hop, no one expresses it better than the Rock The Bells International Festival Series. The annual festival strives to expose all elements of hip-hop and bboy culture and has succeeded every year since its inception in 2003, with the reunited Wu-Tang Clan, their last show with the late ODB. This year’s RTB kicked off in Chicago on June 27, and is making its way to the West Coast birthplace of Rock the Bells. Two shows - Aug. 8 in L.A. at the San Manuel Amphitheater and Aug. 9 in the Bay Area at the Shoreline Amphitheater promise to be the biggest yet! The “Bells” is an indoor/outdoor festival with traditional vendors for all your hip hop needs, that also includes a full multimedia experience with nothing but the best DJs and MCs in the game. Some past performances include, A Tribe Called Quest, De la Soul, Mos Def, Jay Z, Public Enemy, Lauryn Hill, Eryka Badu and even hip-hop rockers Rage Against the Machine.
Bottom: House of Pain featuring La Coka Nostra. COURTESY PHOTOS
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Rock the Bells has become more of a stage for the hip-hop hall of fame, and this year is no different.
Artists like Psycho Realm, Necro, Rza, Gza, Raekwon The Chef, Talib Kweli and Hi Tek performing as
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BAKOBIT from Bakotopia.com
August 6, 2009
Tribute Bands We’d
Like to See
Above: The members of “Cash’d Out” - The Johnny Cash Tribute want to remind you that if you want to live like your idol, you best keep it real. COURTESY PHOTO
By Matt Munoz, Bakotopia Editor & Bakotopians aying tribute isn’t easy, especially if you SUCK! Inspired by one of our favorite local live music watering holes, Fishlips, and its love affair with booking great tribute bands like the incredible “Aeromyth” - A Tribute to Aerosmith, and “Bon-Fire” - A Tribute to AC/DC, my fellow Bakotopians and I decided to have some fun. Many of you have bore witness to the aforementioned great tribute bands, but have also been stuck watching snoozers like, “Mommie’s Little Monsters” - A Tribute to Social Distortion. Tip: If you’re going to start a tribute band, at least TRY and act like the artists you’re portraying. The Rage Against The Machine Tribute band singer didn’t even have Zach De La Rocha dreadlocks, or even sound like him. Even worse, the band Arden Park Roots opened up for themselves magically re-appearing after a few beers as “The Livin’s Easy” - A Tribute to Sublime, not as a three
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piece, but as a four piece! What the? Listen, some bands aren’t even worthy of a tribute! Next thing you know we’ll be seeing tributes to Aqua and Sugar Ray! Spare us, please? Take a lesson from the real deal, like “Cash’d Out” - The Johnny Cash Tribute. That band looks, acts, and sounds like they stepped out of the era, and engage their audience in character. Plus, even our locals, “The Afterparty” have outrageous costumes and can play their ‘80s rock tribute tunes better than Poison ever did. Here’s a list of non-existent tribute bands we’d like to see one day. Ranging from the absurd to the absolutely stupid, Bakotopians came out in force to add their requests. LOCALS BANDS TOO! “Section 8” - A Tribute to Big House “The Cost Effective Hookers” - A Tribute to Cheap Trick “PMS” - A Cramps Tribute to PM Dawn
“Gishbone” - An Early Smashing Pumpkins Tribute to Fishbone
“Fruit and Weed” - A Reggae Tribute to Peaches & Herb
“The Tone Deaf Lobotomy” - A Tribute to Michael McDonald
“Dantanna” - The Robert Urich / Vega$ Tribute to Santana
“Yeast” - A Tribute to Bread
“S**t Creek” - A Punk Tribute to Nickle Creek
“Batteries Not Included” - A Tribute To Steely Dan “Crap” - A Tribute to Creed “Maranna” - The X-Rated All-Spanish Tribute to Madonna “Which One’s Stink?” - A Pink Floyd Tribute Band That Smells Like Pink Floyd “Philly Midol” - A PMS’ng Chick from Philadelphia Tribute to Billy Idol
“Dub Spleens” - A Musical Anatomy Reggae Tribute to Dub Seeds. “Skeezer” - A Union Avenue Tribute to Weezer “Snuffalufagus City” - A Sesame Street Tribute to David Bowie “Mental BooBoo” - A mispronounced Lyrical Tribute to Mento Buru
“Extenze” - A Tribute to Limp Bizkit
“Dradle of Thorns” - A Klezmer Tribute to Cradle of Thorns
“Pearl Spam” - A Junk Mail Tribute to Pearl Jam
“NOFEMA” - A Post Hurricane Katrina Tribute to ADEMA
“PopKORN” - NSYNC Tribute to KORN
“Dharmagreglist” - A Dharma and Greg Tribute to Karmahitlist
BAKOBIT from Bakotopia.com
August 6, 2009
COURTESY PHOTO
Calling All Musicians Forget American Idol! Here's your shot to get some real exposure - get on up! By Arts Council of Kern, Bakotopia.com contributor re you a Kern County musician (solo or in a group) that hasn't yet hit the big time? If so, there is an opportunity to get you closer to that dream. The Arts Council of Kern has received a grant from the Irvine Foundation to give professional training and to provide concert opportunities to a lucky few who will be selected to participate in this program. The first part of the process is to submit photos of yourself or your group, a CD or DVD of your work, and a resume or other materials that describe your efforts and accomplishments, to date. Next, a panel of professional music pro-
A
ducers and musicians will review the submissions and make their recommendations for auditions. After auditions, the selected musicians will be trained in marketing, brought to a recording studio, and provided an opportunity to play for audiences in Kern County. Submissions should be mailed to the Arts Council of Kern, 2000 K Street, Suite 110, Bakersfield, CA 93301. Submissions are due by August 28, and auditions will occur in early October and will be completed by October 28. The Arts Council can be reached by calling 661-324-9000. Tell them BAKOTOPIA sent you!
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