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PIC Life Why clashing egos are a cause of harm By Moira Billinge The wind and the sun were disputing which was the stronger. Suddenly they saw a traveller coming down the road, and the sun said: ‘I see a way to decide our dispute. Whichever of us can cause that traveller to take off his cloak shall be regarded as the stronger.’ So the sun retired behind a cloud, and the wind began to blow as hard as it could upon the traveller. But the harder he blew, the more closely did the traveller wrap his cloak round himself, till at last the wind had to give up in despair. Then the sun came out and shone in all his glory upon the traveller, who soon found it too hot to walk with his cloak on. The moral of Aesop’s fable is ‘kindness achieves more than severity’.
I was enthralled by this fable at the age of seven. At face value it had all the ingredients to delight a child – culminating in a villain receiving his comeuppance as kindness and gentleness overcame brute force. Looking back on the story now with the experience of life and hindsight, I have come to believe that both the sun and the wind were manipulators to some extent. If the traveller had not taken his cloak off because of the heat, how long would the sun have continued to shine on him? How much more intense would it have had to become to produce the desired effect if he had insisted on keeping it on? He was, after all, only removing his cloak because the sun had made him so very uncomfortable. If we need somebody to understand our position or opinion and want them to meet us even halfway, then they are not
likely to listen if we become aggressive and start shouting at them. And if they are less able to deal with confrontation and back down under the onslaught, unresolved issues could well be left to fester in the background and probably make a bad situation worse. Perhaps mutual empathy, respect and listening might have prevented the problem in the first place or at least helped towards resolving the difficulty. Both the sun and the wind were unjust in their treatment of the unsuspecting man, who became the unwitting and innocent victim of their selfishness and greed. Determined to prove which was stronger, bigger and better than the other, they used the traveller for their own ends, ignoring his rights and their duty of care. In today’s world it is the innocent who are too often trapped between the conflicting egos of the self-centred. Wars are declared and fought, often with great violence and bloodshed. Far too many are needlessly hurt, killed and bereaved. When peace finally comes to Syria, will history judge the conflict to have been worth the tens of thousands of deaths, hundreds of thousands of injured, millions of refugees and the destruction of some of the world’s greatest and most irreplaceable historical treasures? When traumatised and shattered families can rebuild their lives, will they be grateful for the conflict and hardship forced upon them? Will they not, rather, wish that they might have been left alone in the security of their homes and villages?
Worth a visit - Harrogate The town of Harrogate in Yorkshire is well known for its quaint streets, historic houses and landscaped gardens, writes Lucy Oliver. The Royal Pump Room is among its most celebrated Grade II-listed buildings, now converted from a spa-water pump house to the town’s museum. In the 19th century, Harrogate’s affluent population and gentrified visitors from further afield visited the Pump Room to ‘take the waters’, drinking the spa water with its distinct sulphur smell for the believed medicinal properties and health benefits. At the height of its popularity, the spa was attracting 15,000 people in the summer months and esteemed guests even included Tsarina Alexandra of Russia in 1911. Visitors today can enjoy a well tour at this museum, learn more about Harrogate’s history and see temporary exhibitions such as ‘Make Do and Mend’ which explores the impact of World War Two on fashion. As we count down to Christmas, consider a visit between Friday 3rd and Sunday 12th December to enjoy the popular Christmas market and,
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of course, don’t leave without a stroll through the Stray, Harrogate’s central park, and a visit to Betty’s Tea Rooms for sandwiches, cake and light refreshments.
