Wedding Planner
2017
2 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Make proposals special and successful
marriage proposal is a couple’s first of ficial step toward the altar. Tradition dictates that men pop the question, with their surprised — and hopefully soon-to-be-fiancées — ultimately deciding if wedding bells will be on the horizon. Proposing mar riage can be ner vewracking. However, if the time seems right and love is in the air, popping the question can be exciting. Regardless of who is proposing marriage, the following strategies can help make proposals memorable and successful.
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Turn the tides An old Irish tradition known as “The Lady’s Privilege” was established in the fifth century by a nun named St. Brigid. She decided to create an opportunity for women to propose marriage. This day fell on every leap year, February 29. Centuries later, women can still use this tradition as the impetus to take the marriage reigns into their own hands. But women need not wait for the next leap year to propose. Many women view proposing as an empowering action that is tied to the evolving view of independent women. Couples are negotiating more in the marriage process, and the dissolution of commonly held practices is occurring more often. Choose a sentimental location Couples will remember the proposal for the rest of their lives. So choose a proposal location that has sentimental connections. Think about where the first “I love you” was uttered or where a first date occurred. These can be prime locations to pop the question.
Note her style Engagement rings play a big role in many couples’ proposals. One person’s style is not necessarily what his partner will like. Bigger isn’t always better. Rather, choose a ring that reflects your partner’s preferences and personality. Take your partner jewelry shopping and see which types of jewelry he or she is most drawn to. Certain preferences can serve as a jumping off point for ring designs. Ask for the family’s blessing Men no longer need to ask their girlfriends’ fathers for “permission” to wed their daughters. However, asking your partner’s family for their blessing is a sign of respect and can add a romantic and heartfelt touch to the proposal. Capture the moment Though we live in an age when every moment of people’s lives is documented with videos and photographs posted to social media, proposals still stand out as extra special moments. Hire a professional photographer to discreetly capture the proposal and your partner’s reaction so it can be cherished for years to come.
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
Wedding Planner 3
Stunning engagement ring alternatives W hite diamonds have been the traditional engagement ring stones for decades. While shoppers have experimented with gold, silver, platinum, and other precious metals for ring bands, the star of the show has long been that twinkling, pristine diamond. Even though diamonds may be a “girl’s best friend,” they may not fit every woman’s style, particularly the bride who likes to buck tradition and think outside the box. According to Money magazine, the average engagement ring costs more than $5,800. In addition to being one of the most expensive gemstones, diamonds have become quite commonplace. Some women even eschew diamonds for moral reasons. Whatever the driving force behind shopping for alternative gems, women who want to set themselves apart from others — and men who want to “wow” their significant others with unique and eye-catching rings — may opt for other dazzling stones. • Moissanite: This cr ystal naturally occurs in meteorites and is nearly as hard, dense and scuff-resistant as a diamond. Some feel moissanite offers more brilliance and fire than diamonds. Moissanite is a white-colored stone, so it can mimic the look of a diamond. And since it can be made in the laboratory at a fraction of the cost of even lab-made diamonds, it’s a frugal option. A nearly flawless one-carat moissanite gem can cost less than $1,000. • Lemon quartz: This is the trade name for a lemon-yellow stone that is a variety of color-enhanced transparent quartz. Quartz is turned into this sunny hue through an artificial gamma ray irradiation process. Like other quartz gemstones, lemon quartz is considered to be very durable and is therefore suitable for all types of jewelry.
• Sapphire: Sapphires tend to be blue stones (of varying intensity), but they also come in peach, pink, yellow, green, and white. Sapphire may not sparkle as much as a diamond or even moissanite. However, with the right cut, it can be hard to distinguish any lack of luster. Sapphires are the third hardest mineral, and at about one-third the price of diamonds, they make an ideal diamond substitute. • Morganite: According to the blog Bridal Musings, morganite is currently one of the most popular choices for engagement rings. Its pretty pink hue is romantic and feminine. It also sits at around the same hardness as sapphires, ensuring the rings will endure. Vividly cut rubies, emeralds and tanzanite — all gems that are rarer yet less expensive than diamonds — can make beautiful engagement rings. Some couples also may opt for rings without gemstones, such as traditional Claddagh or “true lover’s knot” rings to signify their union.
4 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Wild, natural and local: trends in floral centerpieces
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hether designing with flowers for a huge formal event or a small casual affair, the trend is toward a more wild and natural look, according to floral designer Ariella Chezar of the FlowerSchool in New York. That can include blooms, branches, fruit and foraged materials, like rosemary and jasmine, she said. And the best place to start is with your local flower farmer or farmer’s market. “It’s impor tant to consider the setting before deciding on the arrangement. Mason jars are great, but they wouldn’t work at the Waldorf,” said Chezar, who has designed floral arrangements for hundreds of weddings as well as for the White House. She is co-author with Julie Michaels of the new “The Flower Workshop” (Ten Speed Press, March 2016), which has tips on ever ything from textures and colors to foliage and containers. It includes step-by-step instructions for more than 45 floral projects. Another important factor in selecting flowers and arrangements is which colors suit the bride, Chezar said in an interview from her home in upstate New York. “It seems like 90 percent of the blonde brides choose pastels and 90 percent of brunettes opt for jewel tones, since people tend to be drawn to the colors they look best in,” Chezar said. But the most crucial element is finding out what flowers are in season in the vicinity of the wedding, said Chezar, who is also a flower grower.
Containers are also important
“The idea is to let things extend beyond the edge of a vase, to give a sense of movement and direction. Cylindri-
cal vases are the least friendly to this because they are too ver tical. Urns or bowls or anything that allows flowers to extend outward is much more wonderful to work with,” Chezar says. Besides flower growers and farmers markets, she said, “another great resource is nurseries. If you don’t want to deal with cut flowers, you can have a mass of pansies in a pot. Nice containers elevate even humble plants to something more elegant, and a plant is almost always cheaper than cut flowers, plus it lasts.” She war ned, however, that those
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Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
tr ying to make their own wedding centerpieces should think carefully before deciding to do so. “Nobody realizes how much work it takes to do your own flowers,” she said. “Don’t think you can do it the last week. You need to plan way ahead, do some research to get a sense of what’s going to be available when you’ll be needing it, put together an idea board of varieties and colors, and practice doing it ahead of the event itself.” For those who do opt for creative homemade arrangements, there are infinite options. “I’ve found wild grapevines contor ted in shapes I could never reproduce, fiddlehead ferns unfurling with the day, and spiky chestnuts still green on the tree. Take advantage of generous gifts like these,” Chezar writes in her book. “They are nothing you can plan, but they can make all the difference between an ordinary arrangement and one that turns heads.”
FULL EVENT DESIGN
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6 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Selecting a comfortable wedding gown
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any brides-to-be visit bridal shops with specific goals in mind regarding the style of their wedding gowns. Some women come equipped with magazine tear-outs or pull up ideas on their mobile phones. Others may have an entire scrapbook filled with various ideas they’ve been compiling for years. Much consideration is given to wedding gowns. The cost and silhouette of the dress may garner the bulk of that consideration, but brides might want to spend more time considering comfort. Depending on the time of day their weddings take place, brides can spend 12 hours or more in their wedding gowns on their wedding day. However, when shopping for their gowns, brides may prioritize beauty over comfort, even though it’s entirely possible to find a gown that’s both stunning and comfor table. When staf f and friends or family who have come along to offer advice start to blush over wedding gowns, brides-to-be may feel pressured to downplay any discomfort they feel. To make sure brides look flawless and elegant but are still comfortable in their wedding gowns, consider the following tips. • Know what to highlight and what to cover up. No two body types are the same, and many women feel certain parts of their bodies are their best assets while they want to downplay others. Tr y on gowns that play up your best features. If you have shapely legs, consider a dramatic gown with a slit to show them off. Certain gowns can enhance the decollete or
show off an hourglass shape. Remember, many gowns can be modified so that you feel secure and confident. Sleeves can be added or fabric placed to cover up any perceived flaws. Confidence and pride are important parts of the comfort factor. • Get sized correctly. Bridal gown sizes do not coincide with street sizes. Depending on the manufacturer, brides may have to select gowns that are several sizes larger than they would normally wear. This should not be a cause for alarm. Brides should go by their measurements. Attempting to squeeze into a dress that is too small will only lead to discomfort on the wedding day.
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
• Purchase the right undergarments. Improperly fitting bras, shapewear and other undergarments can lead to discomfort as well. Some seamstresses can sew in supportive cups to remove the need for separate bras. Brides can explore various options to reduce the visibility of certain accoutrements. • Move around in the gown. Brides should not just stand in front of the mirror and smile when trying on gowns. Put them through their paces. Tr y sitting, bending and even a little dancing. Make sure the dress is comfor table to move around in. • Tr y dif ferent options. The gown brides have in mind may not be the one they ultimately go home with. Explore dif ferent styles and materials. Choose cooler, breezier fabrics and lightweight gowns, like crêpe, georgette or organza, for summer weddings. Heavier fabrics, such as brocade, may be more comfortable in the winter.
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Wedding gowns can be both beautiful and comfortable for those who know how to shop.
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8 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
How to build your wedding budget
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ouples engaged to be married have a lot on their plates as they begin planning their weddings. Whereas tradition once demanded parents of the bride pay for a couple’s wedding, nowadays more and more engaged couples are completely or partially financing their own nuptials. That means prospective brides and grooms must develop wedding budgets that won’t ensure their first act as Mr. and Mrs. is paying down debt. Owensboro bride Bailey Cummins said she and her husband both agreed that setting a budget was “absolutely important.” She also encouraged couple to budget 10-20 percent more than planned for unexpected expenses that pop up. “The wedding is about the happy couple, so unless someone else is footing the bill, do not let them push you into making decisions you do not agree with,” Cummins said. “We heard a lot of complaints from family about having a Sunday wedding that’s what we wanted so we stuck to our decision since Andrew and I paid for our wedding entirely by ourselves.” In its 2015 Real Weddings Study, online bridal resource The Knot found that many couples still receive substantial financial support from their parents to pay for their weddings. The survey found that, on average, the bride’s parent’s contributed 44 percent of the overall wedding budget in 2015, while couples financed 43 percent (the remaining 13 percent was financed by the groom’s parents and additional sources). Couples who hope to follow that formula or pay for their weddings on their own can heed the following tips to build wedding budgets that won’t break the bank but will still ensure a day to remember forever. • Examine your collective finances. Few couples know the details of each other’s finances before getting engaged. While some
may still hesitate to share their personal financial information upon getting engaged, an open and honest discussion and examination of each person’s finances is the only way to develop a realistic wedding budget that both partners can live with. Once couples know what they can contribute, they can then consult their parents to determine if their mothers and fathers are intending to contribute. • Develop a preliminary guest list. A preliminary guest list can give couples an idea of how large and expensive their weddings will be. According to the Real Weddings Study, the average cost per wedding guest in 2015 was $237. While that cost can vary greatly depending on geography and other factors, couples should keep that figure in mind when drafting their guest lists. If need be, keep costs down by trimming the guest list so it includes only close family members and friends. • Don’t count on gifts. Many couples justify runaway wedding budgets by telling themselves that they will ultimately get the money back via wedding gifts. While many guests will give financial gifts, counting on such windfalls is a recipe for accruing debt. Do not build potential wedding gifts into your wedding budget. If you do so and your expectations fall short, you could be facing considerable debt upon returning home from your honeymoon. • Gather quotes before choosing where to tie the knot. Where couples get married will have a great impact on how much money they will spend on their weddings. For example, the Real Weddings Study found that, in 2015, the average wedding in Manhattan cost couples slightly more than $82,000, while the average Alaskan wedding cost just over $17,000. Venues within the same city can vary greatly with regard to pricing and offerings as well, so couples should give themselves ample time to gather quotes and find an affordable venue they like.
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
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How to save money on the wedding cake A
long as you don’t advertise where you bought the cake, there’s a good chance no one will be able to detect a discounted cake. • Choose ready-made cakes and stack them yourself. Find a bakery near you that keeps a constant supply of specialty cakes in their display cases. Purchase 2 to 3 cakes of the same variety and find cake pedestals from a party or craft store. Embellish the tiers with a few fresh flowers and you have a tiered cake for a minimal cost. • Think about an alternative to cake. Tarts, pies, cream puffs, and other culinary creations may be more affordable and just as delicious as a lavish cake.
THE CUP CAKERY ng & i d d We
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wedding cake is a crowning finale to a momentous wedding day. Couples spend hundreds of dollars on tiered confectionary creations, which provide great photo opportunities and even better desserts. For couples who prefer not to spend too much on a cake, there are ways to save money and still savor a delicious dessert. • Ask a local bakery or restaurant if the pastry chef will create your wedding cake. Oftentimes, bakers who do not specialize in wedding cakes will make a cake at a much lower cost than bakeries known for their wedding cakes. If you adore a dessert at a particular restaurant, ask to have it duplicated. • Commission an amateur baker, such as a friend or family member, to make your cake. There are many budding cake artists out there, several of which have the cursory skills to create a delicious and aesthetically appealing cake. Friends or family members may even make the cake for little or no cost. • Keep decorations and flavors to a minimum. The more embellishments and designs you put on the cake, the more expensive it will be. Stick to the basics, and the cake won’t cost as much. • Skip the tiered cake. Tiered cakes require careful stacking and engineering. Also, if the tiers themselves are made of crystal or another expensive material, it could inflate the cost of the cake. Choose a lowerprofile cake to save money. • Serve guests from a sheet cake. Some couples opt to have a dummy cake on display or just a small cake for cutting purposes, and then have waitstaff serve from a simple sheet cake. Guests rarely recognize the difference. • Shop at a warehouse center. Warehouse centers often have an in-store bakery capable of producing cakes for large crowds. These cakes can be delicious and inexpensive. As
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10 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Wedding guest books now take many forms BY LISA A. FLAM
A
ASSOCIATED PRESS
lexis and John Roulette don’t have to look far to remember the love that friends and relatives showered upon them on their wedding day. The 7-foot-long surfboard mounted above their living room couch says it all. In silver Sharpie, guests wrote messages of love, congratulations and advice on the board that the couple used as a guest book at their wedding in Huntington Beach, California, last summer. “It’s a constant reminder of our special day and the love we had around us,” says Alexis Roulette, 30.
A 3L size bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon that was used as a guest book for a wedding in Austin, Texas. After the attendees signed the bottle, it was engraved and painted over to preserve it.
As weddings have become highly personalized, the guest book, too, has come a long way. What was once a traditional white bound book has become elaborate and creative, often taking the shape of something that reflects the couple’s personalities or wedding theme. “What it’s morphed into is more of a way of delivering messages and notes and keepsakes for the bride and groom, while at the same time it’s become more interactive and creative in its display,” says Darcy Miller, editor at large of Martha Stewart Weddings. Guests might sign a giant wine bottle, a
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Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
piece of sporting equipment, seashells or stones, maps, artwork, or fabric squares that get stitched together to form a quilt. Miller has seen a vintage typewriter displayed for guests to peck out messages, a dictionary in which guests circled words relevant to the couple, and a globe on which guests signed near places they felt the couple should visit. “If you love to ski, it’s signing vintage skis,” she says. “If you’re into boating and the nautical theme, then it’s a buoy.” Guests might snap an instant photo and leave it behind with a message, to be compiled in a scrapbook. Or a couple might offer a published book for guests to sign, Miller says, such as a book on birds for a natureinspired event. Because guest books are so individualized, they often become part of the couple’s home. “It becomes personalized decor you live with,” Miller says. “These are no longer things getting stuck in a box and never looked at ever again.” The Roulettes’ surfboard guest book fit the laidback feeling of their beach-themed wedding at Don The Beachcomber. “It’s a really nice piece that I appreciate that we have and can admire,” Roulette says. “I like that we can see it every day rather than a book. Any guest book, you normally put it away and won’t see it.” Jane Kernen, a wedding planner with Austin Busy Brides in Texas, specializes in events held in nontraditional venues. Most of her couples shy away from the traditional guest book, she says. And while traditional guest books were often set out in church, her couples tend to display their alternative guest books during cocktails. “Couples want something for people to talk about and an activity during the cocktail hour,” she says. The nontraditional sign-ins also help guests get to know the couple better. Kernan once worked with a pair of pilots who were married in an airplane hangar; they asked guests to sign a propeller that was later hung over their mantel. A couple who married at a botanical garden put out self-addressed, stamped postcards featuring botanical prints, on which
Wedding Planner 11
A surfboard guest book that was appropriate for the couple’s beach themed wedding. guests could write well wishes and marital advice. Such alternatives to guest books can become “a keepsake of something that’s personal to you, but made that much more personal because it’s been touched and signed by people you love,” Miller says.
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12 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
12-Month
Wedding Planner Use this handy guide to keep important notes as you decide the details of your event. Keep these notes for reference so no details are missed!
RECEPTION SITE (12 months before wedding)
Headpiece_____________________________
Address_______________________________ Contact/phone__________________________ Setup date/time_________________________ Reception time/length____________________ Minimum/maximum # guests_______________ Size of tables___________________________ Tables/chairs rental fee___________________ China/linens rental fee___________________ Parking_______________________________ Handicap accessible?____________________ Total cost of venue_______________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due______________________________
Gloves________________________________
THE GOWN (9-12 months before wedding) Store_________________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Style__________________________________ Train length____________________________ Color_________________________________ Size__________________________________ Order date_____________________________ _____________________________________ Expected date__________________________ _____________________________________ Fitting dates___________________________ Total gown cost_________________________
Shoes_________________________________ Earrings______________________________ Necklace______________________________ Lingerie_______________________________ Slip__________________________________ Hosiery_______________________________ Total accessory cost _____________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due______________________________ FOOD AND BEVERAGE (9 months before) Caterer_______________________________ Contact/phone__________________________ Price range of menu_____________________ Menu_________________________________ Price each_____________________________ Child price____________________________ Punch and soft beverages_________________ Alcohol_______________________________ hors d’oeuvres__________________________ Total cost of food _______________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due______________________________
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
FLORALS (9 months before wedding) Florist_____________________________ Contact____________________________ Address____________________________ Phone_____________________________ PHOTOGRAPHY (9-12 months before wedding) Photographer__________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Arrival time/place_______________________ Hours of work__________________________ Photography cost_______________________ Film/developing cost_____________________ Travel cost_____________________________ Wedding albums________________________ Additional prints________________________ Engagement photo______________________ Wedding announcement photo_____________ Special requests_________________________ Who owns negatives?____________________ Total cost of photography_________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Date album will be ready_________________
BRIDAL ATTENDANTS (6 months before wedding) Store_________________________________ Dress_________________________________ Style__________________________________ Color(s)_______________________________ Sizes__________________________________ Headpiece_____________________________ Shoes_________________________________ Sizes/colors____________________________ Gloves________________________________ Jewelry_______________________________ Order date_____________________________
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Expected arrival________________________ _____________________________________ Fitting dates___________________________ Total attendant cost _____________________ WEDDING CAKES (6 months before wedding)
Bakery________________________________ Contact/phone__________________________ Setup date/time_________________________ Cake flavor/shape_______________________ Filling/Icing___________________________ Side/Icing toppings______________________ Decoration/Top_________________________ Tiers/servings__________________________ Groom's cake flavor/shape________________ Servings_______________________________ Total cost of cakes_______________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due______________________________ TRANSPORTATION (6 months before) Limousine service _______________________ Contact/phone__________________________ Make/model____________________________ # of vehicles/passengers__________________ Hours needed__________________________ Total transportation cost__________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due ______________________________ PRINTING (6 months before wedding) Printer________________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Invitation style__________________________ Enclosures__________ Responses __________ Announcements_______Envelopes __________ Thank you cards_____ Stationery __________ Pew cards___________ Programs __________ Change-of-address cards_________________ Date ordered___________________________ Date expected__________________________ Total printing cost_______________________ Deposit due__________ Date due __________ Balance due__________ Date due __________ Total postage cost _____________
14 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
GIFT REGISTRY (6 months before wedding) Registered at___________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Items registered ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ Registered at___________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Items registered ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ Registered at___________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Items registered ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ Registered at___________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Items registered ________________________ ________________________ ________________________ HONEYMOON (3-6 months before wedding) Travel agency__________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Destination____________________________ Passport or Visa needed__________________ Departure date & time___________________ Airline________________________________
Flight Number__________________________ Cost__________________________________ Car rental company_____________________ Cost__________________________________ Estimated taxi cost______________________ Hotel name____________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Meals included_________________________ Spending money estimate_________________ Total cost of honeymoon__________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due ______________________________ TUXEDOS (3 months before wedding) Store_________________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Contact_______________________________ Jacket style/color________________________ Shirt style/color_________________________ Cummerbund/Vest style/color______________ Tie style/color__________________________ Shoe style/color_________________________ Total Tuxedo Cost_______________________ Deposit due____________________________ Date due______________________________ Balance due____________________________ Date due______________________________ CEREMONY MUSIC (3 months before wedding) Recorded Music_________________________ Soloist/group___________________________ Contact_______________________________ Address_______________________________ Phone________________________________ Time of arrival_________________________ Song details_________________________ Total cost of ceremony music___________ Deposit amount______ Date due_________ Balance due_________ Date due_________
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
RECEPTION MUSIC (3 months before wedding) Recorded Music______________________ Band/DJ___________________________ Contact____________________________ Address____________________________ Phone_____________________________ Time of arrival______________________ Hours of play________________________ Total cost of ceremony music___________ Deposit amount______ Date due_________ Balance due_________ Date due_________
CEREMONY
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Delivery Times____________________ Altar____________________________ Pew markers______________________ Bridal bouquet____________________ Attendants’ bouquets________________ Flower girl bouquet________________ Groom’s boutonniere_______________ Groom’s attendants’ boutonnieres_____ Ring Bearer boutonniere_____________ Fathers’ and grandfathers’ boutonnieres_ Mothers’ and grandmothers’ corsages__ Officiant RECEPTION Room/Hall________________________ Head table________________________ Guest tables/number________________ Cake table________________________
ENGAGEMENT ANNOUNCEMENT
Beverage table_____________________ Tossing bouquet____________________
(6 weeks before wedding) Contact the Messenger-Inquirer to announce your engagement
Going-away corsage________________ Others___________________________ Total cost of flowers________________ Deposit due_______________________ Date due_________________________ Balance due_______________________
HAIR AND MAKEUP (6 weeks before wedding) Hairstylist__________________________ Makeup artist_______________________ Address____________________________ Phone_____________________________ Appointment time____________________ Total hair and makeup cost_____________
Date due_________________________ GOWN MAINTENANCE (after wedding) Cleaning cost_______________________ Storage cost_________________________ WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT (after the wedding) Contact the Messenger-Inquirer to announce your wedding
16 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Trending: campgrounds, bubbles and food trucks BY BETH J. HARPAZ
I
ASSOCIATED PRESS
f your idea of a wedding involves throwing rice and eating a slice of white, three-tiered cake, you’ve got some catching up to do. These days, guests blow bubbles or light sparklers instead of throwing rice. Trendy couples are getting married in barns and campgrounds, and they’re hiring food trucks for dinner and serving doughnuts for dessert. And how did anyone get married before the internet? From Pinterest inspiration to emailed invites and hashtagged photos, everything but the “I do” can be digital. We got input from more than 100 sources — including wedding planners, hotels and caterers, newlyweds and guests, websites, magazines and Mindy Weiss’ “The Wedding Book” — to compile the following look at what’s new in weddings.
The Ceremony
Instead of a printed program, look for chalkboard signs telling you where to go, what to do and when. Online certification and relaxed legal requirements for officiants in many states means it’s much easier for couples to have friends or relatives perform their ceremony instead of a minister or justice of the peace. Why make a mess throwing rice? These days, newlyweds are feted by bubbles or sparklers distributed to guests beforehand. Dogs are on planes, in stores and everywhere else, so why shouldn’t they walk down the aisle with their owners? Couples are also inviting those nearest and dearest to join them at the altar regardless of gender. A bride can have a male friend by her side and a groom can have a female friend. Some even call them bridesmen and groomsmaids. Shelby Roberts of Owensboro, did decade
dance at her wedding instead of the traditional garter and bouquet toss.
The Setting
Beaches and gardens have been popular alternatives to hotel ballrooms for a while. But venue options are getting even more rustic. Barns are a big trend, as are campgrounds where guests bunk for the weekend and line up for grub in the dining hall. These relaxed, semi-outdoor settings also lend themselves to weddings that feel more like summer camp or bar mitzvahs than formal occasions. Think scavenger hunts, trivia games, color war, campfires, singalongs, volleyball, bocce, croquet and glow necklaces for dancing in the dark.
Food
Anything goes as fun alternatives to staid seated dinners: wedding brunches, food trucks, vegan and gluten-free spreads, barbecues, cheese trays, oyster bars and sliders. Multicultural menus include make-your-own taco bars and sushi stations. And with guests wandering around nibbling this and that, assigned seats can be replaced by a mix of informal tables, chairs, stools, counters, sofas and picnic tables. Booze trends include craft beer and signature cocktails. Some couples still want that three-tiered cake, but lots of wedding desserts are going rogue. Cupcakes were the darling alternative a decade ago, but today’s trendy sweets include milkshakes, gourmet doughnuts, s’mores, pies, churros, candy buffets and make-your-own ice cream sundae bars. There’s also a “naked cake” craze — filling between the layers but no frosting!
Technology
Pity the baby boomers who had to plan their weddings back in the Stone Age.
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
Today’s couples need Pinterest, Instagram and Etsy for inspiration, the WeddingWire database for vendors and WeddingHappy for planning help. They may reject paper invitations in favor of emails. Directions, schedules and other FAQs can be found on personal wedding websites. Digital registries are no longer limited to individual retailers. Amazon has a wedding registry, MyRegistry.com allows you to aggregate products from any number of retailers, and Zola offers a curated selection of products from various brands. Couples with enough towels and silverware might prefer donations toward a honeymoon via sites like GoFundMe or HoneyFund.com. What’s that you’re mumbling about writing a check? Stop living in the 20th century! For photos, the happy couple will provide a custom hashtag to make it easy to find all the Facebook, Instagram and Twitter posts, and they may also ask you to upload your images to a website like WedPics. Are you ready for the wedding video shot by drone? Or are you still trying to wrap your head around weddings that are livestreamed or Skyped for those who can’t be there in person? And what’s that in the side of the wedding gown? A POCKET? Of course! The bride needs to keep her cellphone handy. Because if there were ever a day for selfies and Snapchat, this would be it. Of course there are anti-cellphone couples too. They might ask guests to please put cellphones away to reduce distractions during the ceremony. This policy also prevents you from posting pics that aren’t as flattering as the ones shot and edited by a professional photographer.
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Flowers
Floral arrangements are trending green and wild — eucalyptus, pine boughs and holly berries, wildflowers in jam jars, plants instead of cut flowers and environmentally friendly succulents. Some brides may still toss the bouquet to all the single ladies, but many have tossed that tradition into the garbage. Meghann Richardson contributed to this story.
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18 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Why brides chose Owensboro “We chose to have our wedding at Smothers Park because we didn’t want a traditional church wedding. On our first date, my husband Andrew and I went to lunch at Fetta’s and sat on the swings at Smothers Park for hours to talk so it was nice to have a nod to our first date at our wedding ceremony. Plus, the overlook is absolutely gorgeous so we didn’t even need to decorate for the ceremony.” — Bailey Cummins “The Pioneer Village is beautiful. You need minimal decor and it has a great rustic feel with all the barns and old wooden structures. It’s free to reserve and there was no charge for the venue. It is set back from the rest of the park. With a huge parking lot. And a back gate for vender entrance.
“We are getting married at Preservation Station. Our caterer is Moonlite Bar-B-Que Inn. My mother didn’t want that extra job and did not want to put extra duties on anyone. So thats when we decided to go with Moonlite. Moonlite was chosen because we are both are from Owensboro and love barbecue. There was no question about it.” — Kasey Westerfield
Our wedding was the same weekend as the Owensboro Air Show and the Thunderbirds flew over in the middle of my vows. It was awesome. The air show also gave our out of town guests something to do over the weekend.”
“We chose to get married in Owensboro because not only do most of our family live here but we love the beauty of the riverfront. The riverfront has always been special to us as we have spent many a date nights walking along the park, holding hands and enjoying the scenery. My husband even proposed at the fountain in the middle of Smothers Park. I wanted most of our wedding pictures taken at Smothers so we could have those memories forever.”
— Jacqui Stanley
— Nicole Houp
It’s free to reserve and no charge for the venue. They have everything — electricity, restrooms with running water, plenty of room for littles to run around.
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
Wedding Planner 19
How to find a limousine
E
very bride and groom will need his and her transportation from home to the wedding ceremony and reception. Although there are several options to get couples to and fro, many choose a limousine or another fancy rental car as the preferred mode of travel. It may seem like little work goes into renting a limo. Though transportation might be one of the more hands-off components of wedding planning, that does not make it any less important. After all, if something goes awry, you can be left stranded with no manner of getting to the wedding. It is important for you to get the best service and the right vehicle for the occasion, which requires some comparison shopping. The car service also will need some information from you. Here’s how to start. Initially, seek word-of-mouth recommendations, which can be the best way to narrow down potential limo companies. Ask others which business they used for their special events -- be it weddings, proms, Sweet 16 parties or other important events. If you work at a company that often relies on hired cars for business meetings or transportation to the airport, you may already be familiar with a reliable service -- and they might be familiar with you. Not all limousine services are the same. Price should not be your only method of comparison. Much like a hotel room or a meal at a restaurant, there may be different levels of service among companies. It’s important to compare apples to apples. Figure out a package that will work for you, including size of car, duration of time and any other special features, such as a stocked bar, and then compare this package among the different limo companies you’re considering. The right vehicle also can make all the difference -- and may help you narrow down your choices among companies. For instance, a business might not have the model you want or that vehicle isn’t available the day of your wedding. Also, be sure there will be enough room and if there is trunk space for luggage
for honeymoon essentials. Check whether there are certain add-ons, such as fuel surcharges or tolls that are not factored into the base price. Also, some companies include a driver tip in the cost, while others will leave that to your discretion. Here are some other things to keep in mind. • Book early. Limos, like services from other vendors, will book fast, especially during peak wedding or other seasons. • Consider a package. Most companies have put together a package for special events, like weddings. They may be the best value. • Check registration. Limo companies need to have a license to operate and proper insurance. • Confirm the details. Be sure that the duration of the service, how many people will be transported and all costs are spelled out in a contract for everyone’s protection.
270-684-4688 877-836-5842
20 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Choosing a photographer BY JONATHAN ELDERFIELD
Y
ASSOCIATED PRESS
our wedding is fast approaching and you have an un-blissfully long to-do list, from finalizing your flower selection to choosing your menu to deciding on your dress. Near the top of that list you might want to put “select photographer.” That way, one of the most important parts of your wedding — the memories — will be preserved. Think about booking your photographer soon after you have selected your venue, and make sure he or she is a good fit with your personality. As a photographer with over 25 years of experience, including more than 50 weddings, I know the importance of selecting the right person. Not only will you be spending your entire day together, but the resulting photos will influence how you remember your wedding. Look at potential photographers’ electronic portfolios, pricing and availability, and plan to meet several candidates to gauge their sensibility. Below are five tips on choosing and working with a wedding photographer:
Look For Depth
Ask to see a complete portfolio from beginning to end for at least one or two weddings. You don’t want to see only a few “best” photos. “It’s easy to show a bunch of terrific single images taken at many weddings,” says Radhika Chalasani, “but a great wedding photographer has to capture an entire wedding beautifully from start to finish.” The New York-based Chalasani has been photographing weddings since 2004. Looking at portfolios will ensure that the photographer wasn’t just an assistant or a guest with a camera. You can see how the photographer handles all parts of the wedding, including the
preparations, ceremony, cocktails, portraits, speeches, dancing and cake-cutting.
Get A Contract
A wedding photographer without a contract (and without liability insurance) is likely not a professional. The contract should spell out what the photographer will provide, and whether the pictures will be on DVDs, an online gallery, a finished album, etc. It will include the hours worked, and what happens if you ask the photographer to work longer. In addition, you want to know how things will be handled if the photographer becomes unable to work on the wedding day due to illness or injury. He or she should have a back-up. The contract also should spell out the cost, the amount of any deposit and when the balance must be paid. Small, casual weddings might not seem to require a contact, but having one will protect both you and the photographer.
Don’t Be Shy About What You Want
“There’s no harm in being specific,” says Chicago wedding photographer Candice C. Cusic, a photojournalist for 15 years and a teacher at Northwestern University. Tell the photographer what the most important aspects of the day are to you, whether it’s exchanging rings or walking
Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
Wedding Planner 21
talk loudly over you when you first meet, and who seems cool and composed. The right photographer, says Warga, is someone who leaves you thinking, “it’d be nice to have that person as a guest at my wedding.”
Sweat Some Details
down the aisle. “Brides should be realistic about their day and make every possible effort to help their photographer capture great imagery,” Cusic says. A bride or groom getting ready inside a messy hotel room, for instance, will not make for strong pictures, she notes.
Make Sure Your Personalities Jibe
Other than your significant other, the person with whom you’ll spend the most time on your wedding day might well be your photographer. He or she will be with you as you get ready and as you go through the emotional highs of the day. The photographer might guide you and your family through a portrait session, walk backward as you process up the aisle, and hang close by during your first dance. So this person’s personality — sense of humor, demeanor, even appearance — should be a good fit with both of you. Craig Warga, a New York-based wedding photographer, says “good photography happens when you can get close to your subjects, and they feel completely comfortable being natural and themselves in front of your lens. If you don’t like someone, you’re not going to have that level of comfort in front of them, and it will affect the pictures.” If you like a sassy personality who will add some color to your day, then by all means hire a vibrant, outgoing photographer who exudes energy. On the other hand, if you want a subtle documentary photographer who will capture important moments without being intrusive, go for someone who won’t
Ask if the photographer has a full set of equipment: multiple bodies and lenses with back-ups. Will he or she be working with an assistant or second photographer? If so, what is the additional cost and does that person need to be there all day? If your venue will be dark, can the photographer handle it? Is the photographer able to work in adverse conditions such as rain at an outdoor ceremony? Finally, make provisions for your photographer to eat; it’s hard to be “on” for eight to 10 hours straight. A 15-minute meal break might just be the best thing you do for the photographer. Since 1946
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22 Wedding Planner
Messenger-Inquirer Sunday, January 22, 2017
Add music to your wedding
S
treaming music providers have revolutionized the way consumers listen to and enjoy music. Gone are the days of huddling around a boom box, switching mix tapes or queuing up a multidisc player on the stereo. It’s now possible to make playlists that combine music from various genres in a matter of seconds. Apps from services such as Amazon, Spotify, Pandora, and iTunes enable customers to select among pre-made music playlists or compile their own. These same services also make it easier than ever before for hosts to set musical moods for their parties.
As you prepare playlists for your next party, keep these tips in mind
• Gear the songs toward your key demographic. Even if your party features an eclectic guest list with invitees of various age groups, cater to the masses. Select songs from an era during which the majority of your guests grew up. For corporate events, a selection of instrumental numbers will set the background score. • Go with popular tunes. Scour the Billboard® charts to find today’s most popular music. This may also be helpful when choosing among different genres. • Slow it down for dinner. Regardless of the guest list, when a meal is being served or you want to encourage guests to mingle, the tempo of the music should slow and the volume should be adjusted so guests can engage in conversation without feeling a need to scream. • Rely on the expertise of professionals. Disc jockeys and bands have experience playing for crowds at weddings and other occasions. They’ve grown accustomed to getting requests for certain songs time and again. Use song lists distributed by DJ Intelligence to help shape song selections. For example, their Top 200 Most Requested may be fitting for many parties. That list includes favorites like “Don’t Stop Believin’,” “Cupid Shuffle” and “I Gotta Feeling” in their top five.
• Use a predetermined playlist. Establish a playlist in advance of the party so you have time to mingle and enjoy yourself. Planning ahead also ensures nothing offensive will begin playing once the party begins. • Solicit input from guests. Involve guests in the process of planning your playlist. Guests like having a say in the music they sing along to, and they’re more likely to get out of their seats and cut a rug if the songs are among their favorites. Spartify and Festify work with the Spotify app and allow guests to choose which songs to play next. Spartify will fill in the playlist gaps if guests are indecisive, while Festify works by creating a new party and an exclusive code. Guests then enter the code in their mobile browsers before voting to decide which tracks to play.
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Messenger-Inquirer, Sunday, January 22, 2017
Wedding Planner 23
Guide to a second marriage C
ouples are returning to the altar in increasing numbers, as second and third weddings are becoming ever more popular. Pew Research Center indicates that, as of 2014, 64 percent of divorced or widowed men have remarried, compared with 52 percent of previously married women. Lavish second weddings were once uncommon, but that trend is also shifting. Couples who are taking another crack at marriage are tying the knot with renewed vigor and with weddings that may rival some first-timers’. Men and women who are remarr ying after divorce or being widowed may not know how to approach planning their upcoming nuptials. The following are some guidelines to making the wedding sequel a success.
Wardrobe
Couples who have been married before often find that they have more leeway with regard to their wedding wardrobes than they did when tying the knot for the first time. Brides may choose something less traditional than a long, white dress. In fact, this can be a time to let loose and select something that is festive or even funky. This also may provide a great opportunity to choose clothing styles from different cultures or ties into one’s heritage. This freedom also allows brides to broaden their horizons with regard to where to buy their wedding wardrobes. Grooms may opt for something more casual than a tuxedo or coordinate with their brides-to-be so they are on the same creative page. Colored tuxedos and vintage suits are acceptable, even though such attire might have raised a few eyebrows the first time around.
Guest list
The guest list doesn’t have to be a source of anxiety. Others will understand that there may be a melange of people at a second wedding. Children from previous marriages as
well as divorced spouses or former parentsin-law are not out of the question. Even if exes will not be included, make sure they know about the nuptials in advance of others. It’s common courtesy, and it can help head off feelings of ill-will. Some couples choosing to tie the knot again scale back the size of the wedding this time around, feeling something smaller and more intimate — with only the closest of friends and family — is more suitable.
Registries and wedding gifts
Considering couples who have been married previously likely have many of the housewares and items for daily living that first-timers may not, registering for these gifts is not necessary. What’s more, some of the same guests may have been present at first marriages and gifted then. In lieu of gifts, couples may ask guests to donate to a specific charity or forgo gifts altogether.
Vows
Couples can use experience to draft vows that have personal meaning to their unique situations and make the wedding ceremony even more special. People getting married again can impart their own personalities into the ceremony and party to follow. There are no hard rules governing second weddings, so couples can plan their weddings with good times in mind.
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