December 2012 Metro Christian Living by Mississippi Christian Living

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CONFLICT: His and Hers

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C hapter 1 -W recked for Life The setting sun painted a backdrop of cotton candy pink clouds over the roadside bar and grill w here w e w ould soon hear our favorite acoustic guitarduo sing Jim m y Buffetsongs.Itw as an idyllic W isconsin sum m er nightlate in June of 2005.U nder norm al circum stances, I w ould have enjoyed the w arm breeze and the glow of the festive colored tiki lights on the outdoor deck w ith the sense of carefree recreation that m idw estern fam ilies enjoy w hen school is out and the days are longer. Randy shook his head, sm iling as our tw o daughters took turns throw ing harm less jabs atone another,each laughing hysterically at her ow n jokes. I felt as if I w ere w atching the scene from a distance, fighting back tears as m y m ind returned to the children I had seen tw o days earlier in a squalid hospitalin droughtand fam ine-stricken eastern G uatem alaÂ˛a scene that w ould change m e foreverand w reck m e once and for allforthe relentless pursuitofthe A m erican D ream .I w as haunted by the forlorn faces of tw o children w hose hopeless situation had laid the fram ew ork for the restofm y life. Elias,the severely starved tw o-year-old boy, w as scarcely m ore than skin and bones.H airw as a luxury his body could notafford,as the nutrients available to him w ere barely enough to keep his vital organs functioning.H is face w as sunken and pale,the outline of his ribs and spine clearly visible through his thin layer of skin.H e had been carried by his barefooted ten-year-old sister from El V olcancito, their rem ote m ountain village several m iles aw ay, into the sm all tow n ofJocotan,in hopes thathis life could be saved. The m other of the children w as bedridden w ith a debilitating illness for w hich she could not afford treatm ent.M y heartbroke as m uch forthe boy,barely hanging on and suffering m iserably,as for the young girl, exhausted and saddled w ith the crushing responsibility of keeping her baby brother alive. A

fraillittle girlsatw eeping on a tattered bench atthe entrance to the facility, her body em aciated and her abdom en severely bloated,revealing the presence of parasites w ithin her w eak,trem bling fram e.She had been brought to the hospital for nutritional rehabilitation, and because she w as four years old, and herm otherhad tw o sm allerchildren to care forat hom e,she had been left alone.Lidia could not have understood w hy she had been left behind by her fam ily in this unfam iliar place.She had been sitting on the bench since early m orning w aiting forthem to return. In her hand she clutched w hat w as probably her only toy, a com fort and rem inder of hom e. The lum p in m y throat returned each tim e I recalled opening her tiny hand to find that she held a black plastic vulture. Randy and Iw ere m arried in M ay of1993.D uring our early years together, w e w ere blessed w ith tw o beautifuldaughters and w ere pursuing careers in real estate, clim bing the ranks am ong our colleagues in term s of sales volum e. W e purchased an enorm ous house on four acres, and although it w as only four years old, w e com pletely rem odeled it to suit our tastes. W ith luxury vehicles and an ever-increasing incom e,w e w ere living the A m erican D ream .There w as m uch to be thankful for, but som ething w as m issing. Randy and I had both grow n up near M adison, W iscRQVLQ LQ PLGGOH FODVV IDPLOLHV 5DQG\ÂśV M ethodist and m ine Catholic. W e had attended Sunday services and believed in an all-pow erfulG od, butfaith and religion w ere notplaying a m ajorrole in our adultlives.H aving agreed as new lyw eds to raise ourfam ily in faith,w e dutifully attended services ata congregation near our hom e for seven years.Butw e eventually feltthatw e needed a change and in spring of 2000,w e setoutin search of a new church hom e. W ith no predeterm ined denom ination in m ind, w e experienced a variety of church cultures, som e too form al, som e too w eird, others seem ingly insincere.

W e eventually stum bled across an Evangelical Free church on the w estside ofM adison,nearourhom e in the suburb of V erona. I w as surprised to find that instead of an organ and a choir, this church had a band that played upbeat contem porary Christian m usic on keyboards, guitars and drum s. The young pastor spoke w ith passion,bringing the Bible to life by applying scripture to issues faced by the generations of the tw enty-firstcentury.It w as atthis church thatourfaith cam e alive. O ur new understanding of the gift of salvation through Jesus Christ and the resulting sense of love and gratitude w e felttow ard G od,inevitably began to pose problem s for us.W e w ere em barrassed to invite our new Christian friends to our supersized hom e, and conflictsbegan to surface in ourhearts abouthow our tim e and m oney w ere being spent. O ne of the m any bedroom s in ourhom e had been turned into m y personal closet and w as loaded w ith clothing and shoes,m ostofw hich Idid notneed.Ihad becom e so busy in m y careeras a RealtorthatIbegan to feellike a gerbil on a w heel. M y tw elve-hour w orkdays did not leave room for the peace and joy I had heard should com e w ith our new ly authenticated Christian faith. O ne frantically busy day I decided to return phone calls w hile w aiting in line for lunch at the 0F'RQDOGÂśV GULYH WKURXJK :KHQ D YRLFH FDPH RYHU the speDNHU VD\LQJ Âł&DQ , KHOS \RX"Â´ I w as so preoccupied that I m istook it for a phone call and VDLG Âł+HOOR WKLV LV .LP 7HZV ZLWK WKH 7HZV 7HDP 5HDOWRUVÂ´ 'XULQJ WKH DZNZDUG VLOHQFH WKDW IROORZHG the kid m usthave been thinking,Âł<HDK ZKR FDUHV" :KDW GR \RX ZDQW IRU OXQFK"Â´ That night I arrived hom e from w ork late in the evening to find ourthree-year-old daughterasleep on the couch clinging to a shirt I had w orn the day before. W hen I asked Randy about the shirt he H[SODLQHG Âł6KH VDLG LW VPHOOV OLNH \RX DQG VKH PLVVHV \RX Â´

Itw as tim e for a change.

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CHRISTIAN LEADERS OF THE FUTURE is an opportunity for high-school seniors to share their story of faith and leadership. The top finalists are selected by a panel of judges from around the metro area. They will receive a recognition plaque, gifts, and will be featured on the cover of the March 2013 edition of Metro Christian Living. The most outstanding student will receive a scholarship for the college of their choice. Applications are available at: www. metrochristianliving.com or through your school counselor or youth pastor.

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contents DECEMBER 2012 columns 13 The Way I See It Fallen Idol

15 HomeWorks 4 Weeks to a Low-Stress Christmas

16 Outside In Humility

19 This Is My Story I Choose Joy and Trust God with the Rest!

20 Modern Motherhood Reality Christmas

23 Let’s Talk It Over Gifting a Full Love Tank

24 Salt & Light Gift Giving from His Heart to Ours

34 Think Tank The Energizer Bunny Ain’t Real

36 Let’s Get Real Conflict: His and Hers

37 Single Still, Single Again Steady My Heart

features

38 Pastor’s Perspective From Coveting to Contentment

Ted DiBiase, Jr.

42 Education Connection

WrestleMania Hero With a Heart for God

Magnolia Speech School Passes the Torch

51 Legal Advice Unique Opportunities with the Fiscal Cliff and the Close of 2012

departments 32 Food For Thought Delicious Gifts

40 Fresh Finds 2012 Holiday Gift Guide

43 Welcome Home

Create Your Own Christmas Wreath

44 Healthy Living Exercise Plans that Fit Your Lifestyle

46 Sports Victories Ryan Buchanan – Leadership and Character on the Gridiron

49 Money Matters

Sound Investment Strategies in the 2013 Market

50 Christian Commerce The DORE Program Unlocks Learning Potential

52 Rave Reviews Books, Movies, and Music

What’s Coming Next Month? Drake Bassett President of Palmer Home for Children

➺

8 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

in every issue 10 53 54 54

Editor’s Letter Event Calendar Quips & Quotes Ad Directory

metro ®

Volume 7, Number 6 Publisher: MHS Publications, Inc., Member, M.I.P.A. Editor: Marilyn Tinnin marilyn@metrochristianliving.com Administrative Assistant: Carol Rodgers carol@metrochristianliving.com Associate Editor: Suzanne Tanner Art Direction/Graphic Design Sandra K. Goff Sales Marilyn Tinnin, Kimberly Stephens, Suzanne Tanner Contributing Writers Ariel Anderton, Marla Baker, Lydia Bolen, Julie Crump, Shawn Dean, Nancy Flowers, Cathy Haynie, Jason Hester, William B. Howell, Amy Ingram, Read Meadows, Robin O’Bryant, Janie Pillow, Susan E. Richardson, Christy Solovechik, Neal Stephens, John Hugh Tate, Becky Taylor, Martin E. Willoughby, Jr., Robert Wilson, Andy Wimberly Cover Photography Stegall Imagery Distribution Assistants Laura Kidder, Randy Fortenberry, Carol Rodgers, Andrea Sabillion, Rachel Schulte, Jerri Strickland, Priscilla Sullivan, Tim Waldon, Bob Whatley

Metro Christian Living 573 Highway 51 North, Suite C Ridgeland, MS 39157 Phone 601-790-9076 • Fax 601-790-9078 www.metrochristianliving.com Metro Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Metro Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Metro Christian Living staff to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2012 by Metro Christian Living, Inc. Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of International Bible Society.

Metro Christian Living is published monthly and is available at high traffic locations throughout the metropolitan area. Copies are also available by subscription, $29 for one year. Single issues available for $3 an issue. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Metro Christian Living, 573 Highway 51 North, Suite C, Ridgeland, MS 39157.

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➺editor’s letter Christmas Reflections For millions of people who have lived since, the birth of Jesus made possible not just a new way of understanding life but a new way of living it. It is a truth that, for twenty centuries, there have been untold numbers of men and women who, in untold numbers of ways, have been so grasped by the child who was born, so caught up in the message he taught and the life he lived, that they have found themselves profoundly changed by their relationship with him. – Frederick Buechner

ran across this quote today as I was poring over the jumbled notes I had made over the past month while collecting thoughts for my Christmas letter to you. I have this unorthodox habit of jotting down random ideas as I work on each month’s issue, and then right before the drop-dead deadline, I pull out my scribbles, read all the articles submitted by our contributors, and try to organize my thoughts in some coherent manner. If any journalism professor knew that, he would probably use me as the prime example of what NOT to do! The December letter is always the toughest to write because, as I have pointed out before, my Thanksgiving turkey is probably still strutting around the barnyard somewhere while I try to wax wise and inspired on the subject of Christmas. I have a hard time living beyond the present moment. But I love Buechner’s words, “the birth of Jesus made possible not just a new way of understanding life but a new way of living it.” That would be another way of calling attention to Isaiah’s often quoted words that “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Obviously, God knows we are going to spend a lot of our lifetime in the flesh being baffled about events, circumstances, and relationships that we can’t completely understand or fix, and He is checking in to say, “Don’t worry because I have it under control.” There is a moment in a Believer’s journey when this profound truth really takes root. We realize it is only because of our relationship with Him that in this imperfect and broken world, it is indeed possible to know peace, joy, and the absence of fear even when we don’t understand the “why” or the “what comes next” of it all. He, the Babe of Bethlehem––He is our “new way of living.” And it is that Jesus we celebrate in this Christmas season. As I read over the familiar Christmas story in Luke’s gospel, I realized that after the shepherds worshipped the Baby at Bethlehem, they returned to their posts, guarding their sheep, and there was nothing new or improved about their circumstances. They were still poor shepherds keeping watch over their sheep, but scripture says, “they returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen…” So, no magic acts, no prizes behind the curtain, no sweepstakes. But they were changed by an encounter with the living God, and so––like Buechner says, they had received “a new way of living life.” I am certain through personal experience that knowing Jesus does change our perspective even when it doesn’t change our circumstance. Sometimes, just like the ancient Hebrews who were eagerly awaiting a savior to deliver them from Roman rule, we fix our eyes on this world praying for rescue from a multitude of injustices and uncertainties. Jesus, God’s only begotten son, did not leave the splendor of heaven with that kind of rescue in mind. And when the light comes on in our hearts and mind, we realize that Jesus Christ came to earth with a mission larger than our human minds can ever fathom, but for something our human hearts can embrace with a depth that defies every depressing and pessimistic thought on planet earth. Merry Christmas from all of us at Metro Christian Living. May the true Peace––which is the Christ child––keep your hearts and minds, as you celebrate Him this Christmas season. Y

I was created of ❝ aHemother whom He created. He was carried by hands that He formed. He cried in the manger in wordless infancy. He, the Word, without whom all human eloquence is mute.

❞

– Augustine

10 OCTOBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Marilyn H. Tinnin, Publisher and Editor marilyn@metrochristianliving.com

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the way i see it

by MARTIN E. WILLOUGHBY, JR.

FALLEN IDOL We really like our heroes in this country, and it is sad and tragic when they fall from their pedestal. For some, that fall can be a long and painful crash back to earth. Lance Armstrong has certainly experienced that in the last few months. After years of denials by Armstrong, the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency issued a report that said Armstrong had been involved in the “most sophisticated, professionalized and successful doping program that sport has ever seen.” The International Cycling Union subsequently banned Armstrong from cycling, and his seven Tour de France victories have been stripped. He also stepped down as the Chairman of Lance Armstrong Foundation-, which has now officially dropped his name and become the Livestrong Foundation. Armstrong continues to vehemently deny any wrongdoing, but the damage appears to have already been done. His life’s work is crumbling before him. His titles are gone, his earnings in jeopardy, and his loyal sponsors have abandoned him. Most importantly, his good name has been severely tarnished. Armstrong is someone we wanted to root for. To come from the brink of death from cancer to winning the Tour de France is simply incredible. To repeat that feat six times put him in an elite category of athletes. He not only became a champion, but a genuine celebrity. He had high profile relationships and used his celebrity to do good through his foundation to fight cancer. His Livestrong yellow armbands became a symbol of hope worldwide. However, by all accounts, Armstrong was not a person of faith. In retrospect, it appears that his rise to fame was about his glory and not his Creator’s. In light of that, it is no wonder that he perhaps went to extreme measures to chase the prizes he sought in life. Perhaps achieving those victories became his own personal god. For a follower of Christ, life is viewed through a different lens. It is not about us, but about Him. It is not about our personal fame and ambition, but about His glory. It is not about our wealth, but about storing up heavenly treasure. A believer dies to self, and lives in

Christ. Non-believers can certainly accomplish many good and noble things. However, the motivations and purposes are ultimately different. I certainly don’t know Armstrong’s motivations. As a fallen hero, he is a reminder to us that none of us are worthy of worship. We are worshipping creatures in search of something to worship. That is what leads us to have hearts that are “idol factories.” Fortunately, there is one who is worthy of our worship that will not disappoint. Christ alone is worthy to dedicate our heart, soul, and mind. We see the wisdom in Proverbs that, “A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.” Our health, wealth, and loved ones can all be

For a follower of Christ, life is viewed through a different lens. It is not about us, but about Him. stripped from us–but in the end, we have our good name and our assurance of a faith in Christ. Nothing else really matters. While it is certainly fun to root for great champions, let’s make sure we realize that they are people just like us who are fatally flawed and in desperate need of a savior. As for Armstrong, I pray that he will one day find his ultimate prize in Christ and that God will use in him in powerful ways for advancing His Kingdom. That would be a prize that no one could ever take from Him and would be a victory with eternal rewards. Y

Martin E. Willoughby, Jr,. is Chief Operating Officer of Butler Snow Advisory Services, LLC located in Ridgeland. He and his wife, Nicki, have two children, Ally and Trey, and live in Madison. metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 13

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homeworks by CATHY HAYNIE

4 Weeks to a Low-Stress Christmas It is so easy to feel stressed in December. We add to our regular,

✴ ✴ ✴ ✴

already-full lives a special occasion that seems to pull us into redecorating, giving gifts to everyone we know, and cooking for the masses––all amidst crowds and traffic. The easiest way to de-stress December is to pull back from what our culture expects us of and simplify how we celebrate. Take it a step further by folding a piece of paper in half, and then half again, to give you four columns for dividing December into four blocks. Then, make your to-do list accordingly. Your fourweek planner might look something like this (removing all those things that send you to the breaking point of course):

WEEK 2 ✴ ✴ ✴ ✴ ✴

WEEK 1

✴ Make a holiday budget ✴ Plan gift giving, spiritual emphasis, and ministry opportunities ✴ Shop for gifts to be mailed ✴ Make a super shop day to stock up on things like toilet paper and cereal–then avoid those crowded megastores the rest of the month ✴ Order or purchase Christmas cards ✴ As you cook dinner this week, double and freeze a couple of meals for the rest of the month

Decorate the house Mail out-of-town gifts Address and send Christmas cards Shop for family and friends Double and freeze a couple of meals again this week

WEEK 3 ✴ ✴ ✴ ✴ ✴

Finish online orders Finish shopping for family and friends Wrap gifts Clean the house Begin cooking

WEEK 4 Finish wrapping Finish cooking Deliver gifts Relax and enjoy the season

Another approach is to have a single focus each week: devote one week to decorating and cleaning; one week to gifts––shopping, wrapping, and delivering; one week to cooking; and one week to celebrating and relaxing! Regardless, the best thing you can do is stop and think before the hustle sets in. What is important to you this season? What are the must do’s and the things to set aside? I have found that renewing my focus on Christ the Savior throughout the season and not doing everything every year is helpful––whether it’s Christmas cards or special outings. What is your plan? Y Cathy Haynie and her husband Jack have three children and live in Madison. Cathy is the Headmaster of Christ Covenant School in Ridgeland. Contact her at chaynie@ccs.ms.

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December 13, 6 to 9

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➺outside in by SHAWN DEAN

There’s excitement in the air! You can feel it everywhere! Christmas Time is FINALLY here... Filling our hearts with love and cheer! There’s expectation in their eyes– As kids look for Santa across the skies! It’s hard to describe the feeling of joy Found on the faces of each girl and boy! In the churches, the malls, or down the street... The children are telling everyone they meet, “Santa’s Coming!” they say with a grin! “Yes, Santa Claus is coming again!” “We’ve been ready for him for weeks, you see... With the decorations and our Christmas Tree! Soon, we’ll put out milk and cookies, too! I wonder what Santa will bring for you!?” But, when they awaken on Christmas morn– How many remember their Savior was born? As they take gifts from under the tree; Will they remember Calvary? Will they remember how He died on that Cross, To keep all people from being lost? Or, that He rose again the Third Day? He paid the price we could not pay! Because of Jesus, we won’t die in sin; And better yet, HE is coming again! He’ll take us to a far more wonderful place, Where we’ll see Him daily Face to Face! So, as you take gifts from under your tree– Remember God’s Gift to you and to me! The TRUE meaning of Christmas will be very clear! And, best of all; it will last all year! There’s excitement in the air! You can feel it everywhere! Christmas Time is ALWAYS here... Filling our hearts with love and cheer! There’s expectation in our eyes– As we look for JESUS across the Skies! In the churches, the malls or down the street... His children are telling everyone they meet, “JESUS is coming!!” they say with a grin! “Jesus Christ is coming again!” “I’ve been ready for Him a while, you see... I’d love to take you to Heaven with me!! Soon He’ll be here! You’ll know it, too!” I wonder if Jesus is coming for You?!” Merry CHRISTMAS and a Blessed 2013!

Eugene C. Brown, Jr., D.D.S., M.S., P.A. www.dreugenebrown.com 125 Jones Street, Madison, MS 39110

601-853-0303 5800 Ridgewood Road, Suite 103, Jackson, MS 39211

601-957-1711 Visit us on Facebook at Dr. Brown’s SMILES BY DESIGN “The American Dental Association recommends that a child see an orthodontist by age seven.” MEMBER OF THE AMERICAN ASSOCIATION OF ORTHODONTISTS

16 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Humility “He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8) who is humble and contrite of spirit, and who trembles at My word” (Isaiah 66:2). The greatest book, besides the Bible, ever written on the subject of humility is Humility by Andrew Murray. I double-dog dare you to read take it from him and learn to ride. First, he said, it. I selected a few tidbits for your consumption. They should give you an idea of the depth of the I needed to sign a release form. subject at hand. It looks so easy. If a clown in the circus can He writes, “He prays for humility, at times ride one while juggling three knives and a very earnestly; but in his secret heart he prays flaming torch, I knew I could do it. No more—if not in word, then in wish—to be kept problem. I’m an athlete and that’s better than a from the very things that will make him humble. clown. I can juggle three balls, pop a wheelie, He is not yet so in love with humility— spin a basketball on all ten fingers, walk on esteeming it as the beauty of the lamb my hands, throw popcorn in the air of God and the joy of heaven—that and catch it in my mouth, flip he would sell all to procure it.” cornbread at Cock of the Walk, I picked this up along the and catch it behind my back. Humility is one way. “The humble man is So, I pump up the tire. My of those words thrown exalted for he is relieved of audience––three daughters, about like love, family, self and filled of Himself, the wife and Harvey the and blessed. Something filling ratio equivalent to the cat––gather around with relieving. Thus is the worth anticipation. The first thing I gets lost in the definition of humility.” ~ Anonymous. couldn’t figure out was how with the flippancy in Humility is one of those to get started on the thing. I which it’s used. thrown about words like love, leaned it backwards, sat on the family, and blessed. Something seat, put one foot on the petal gets lost in the definition by the and pushed. It didn’t work. I tried flippancy in which it’s used. In my that a few more times. Still didn’t work. opinion, it is the chief character trait of the Then I tried to lean on the garage wall and transformed man and the one that clearly stands push off. Then I tried to hold on to something out in Jesus, because, for a man, it’s the hardest and just start peddling. I hit the ground a few one to obtain. It’s the deepest form of worship. times. My wife couldn’t watch any more. My To have it, I’ve got to get rid of me and kids got bored with this form of entertainment replace it with Him. I have to be in this world, and left me. Harvey went with them. Then I but not of it. The slow procurement of it is an went back to my first idea––still didn’t work. All evolution of deep spiritual change, and just a alone, I worked with that thing in disbelief. little bit of it is a significantly great achievement. For about a week, I would grab that oneBut yet, it wasn’t achieved. It was afforded to us wheeled circus toy and give it another go. by Him. Y Failure. I couldn’t believe it. I returned it to my neighbor when he wasn’t home. Such is humility. It doesn’t look hard––until Shawn Dean is Regional Sales Manager for Airflo Sales, Inc., located you try it. It’s the trying at it that gives you in Ridgeland, MS. He and his wife, some understanding of its complexity. And, Laura Beth, have three children, failing miserably at humility teaches an important lesson—a lesson in humility—if you Isabelle, Ann Mabry, and Mary Frances. They live in Madison. want to learn it. “…But it’s to this one I will look, to him

here’s more to it than meets the eye. It reminds me of a unicycle. Say what? Yeah, my neighbor had a unicycle in his garage collecting dust. So, I asked him if I could

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Family Medicine metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 17

18 DECEMBER 2012 â?&#x2DC; Metro Christian Living

this is my story by BECKY TAYLOR

I Choose Joy and Trust God with the Rest! hen Marilyn first approached me about writing this article for her magazine, I gasped and kind of laughed.You see, I am no writer; I am a talker. So I guess you can call this a

importantly, my information booth. He can walk every inch of MD Anderson with his eyes closed and never get lost. I still can’t find the front door. Eventually, we settled into our new surroundings and tried to make the best of our “situation.” Still, we missed home. My future conversation on paper. Ironically, because I am was uncertain, and at times I was afraid. Luckily, NOT a writer, as I sat down to begin typing, I with Jeff’s help and God’s help, most of my days prayed, “God please give me YOUR words, not during radiation treatment were joyful and my own, and thank you for giving me a story to happy. Remember the verse I mentioned tell.” Thanking God for my story comes as a earlier, 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “Be joyful always shock even to me, but 1 Thessalonians 5:18 tells and pray continually.” The praying part we had us, “Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is no trouble with, but we chose the joyful part. God’s will for you in Jesus Christ.” God gives us free will to make our own Thanking Him in ALL circumstances is the decisions and choices in almost every aspect of kicker here. In August 2010, I was diagnosed our life. My circumstances from a bird’s-eye with Stage 4 brain cancer called view, if you will, may have looked bleak––if I glioblastoma–the deadliest of its kind. I was chose to look at them that way. Therefore, my referred to MD Anderson–to see the “wizards,” choice was to lean on God to help me through as I lovingly refer to my doctors there–where I each and every day. I prayed to be a beacon of was scheduled for brain surgery to remove the light for Him, that people would see the largest of my three tumors. I was also told I blessings and comfort He had shown to me and would be awake for a large part of my my family, and that they would be made surgery in order to assist the aware of His love, graciousness, and surgeons with my motor skill power. God had used me in an functioning. Psalms 46:10 incredible way to show His My circumstances suddenly became my anthem mercy and faithfulness. I was from a bird’s-eye verse, “Be still and know that taught a new appreciation for view, if you will, may I am God.” My immediate each and every day, and I thought was, “I will be still, have looked bleak—if prayed that my will for my life and God, you just be You!” would be aligned with God’s I chose to look at We both did well! A successful will for my life. I was filled them that way. surgery was followed by 12 with joy for Jesus and wanted to weeks of radiation and a become an example for anyone scheduled full year of chemotherapy. dealing with “situations.” Soon, I We would have to leave our children, family, would learn the truth of these familiar and friends and relocate to Houston for the next words––be careful what you wish for! phase of my treatment. This was the hardest In August 2012, almost two years to the day part by far. I leaned heavily on 2 Corinthians of my brain cancer diagnosis, I was told I had 5:7, “For we walk by faith, not by sight.” I could breast cancer during a routine yearly not “see” where God was leading me, but I had mammogram (get those mammograms, ladies!!). great faith that HE would “walk” me through it. Soon a mastectomy was scheduled, and as you We came home two days before Christmas that are reading this, I have most likely completed year, and being home was the best Christmas two sessions of treatment during my six-month present ever, even though we knew we had to regimen of chemotherapy. And God is still the go back to Houston after Christmas. tower of strength and remains at my side. I must This was a very trying time for our entire admit there have been times of “REALLY?” and family. We had one child in college, one senior “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” Those are the in high school and one eighth grader–hard ages times I envision God smiling down at me and to be so far away. My husband, Jeff, became my saying, “Yep, really, now let’s get to work, girl. I rock, my strength, and an even better friend have plans for you and I won’t be needing your than he was before. He has always been our help. I have this covered.” He confirms this, leader and “calm-in-the-storm” kind of guy. “For I know the plans I have for you, plans to This, however, was different. He became my proper you and not to harm you, plans to give protector, comforter, tour guide, and, most you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).

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Jeff and I continue to travel to MD Anderson every eight weeks indefinitely for repeat MRIs of my brain. The “wizards” maintain that this type of cancer has a history of returning; therefore, they want to keep a close eye on it, for which I am grateful. However, I am most grateful, regardless of the circumstances, to my Great Physician, for HE is actually calling all the shots! My path at times has not been easy, but I still choose JOY. It is so much more fun than sorrow and dread, and it is so much more contagious. In reality, none of us can predict our futures, so don’t waste time trying to plot and plan or get caught up in the “what if’s.” Choose to be JOYFUL! It’s an attitude thing, a heart thing––and totally a God thing! JOY to the World, The Lord has come. May this be your most joyful Christmas ever!! Y Becky Taylor lives in Madison and attends Broadmoor Baptist Church. You can follow Becky on Caring Bridge under beckyataylor.

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➺modern motherhood by ROBIN O’BRYANT

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Reality Christmas hristmas is really almost here. It would be hard for me to believe if I didn’t have the battle scars to prove it. After a week full of Christmas plays

and pageants, I was swept away in the Christmas spirit and decided it would be a grand idea to head to Birmingham, Alabama, from the Mississippi Delta to spend some time with my family for the holidays. It’s laughable now, as my two-year-old sits at my feet and cries inconsolably, that my sister and I actually made plans to bake. I don’t know what we thought we were going to do with five kids under sixyears-old while we went all Keebler Elf; but needless to say, the only cooking we’ve done has been the 12 meals each day these kids have scarfed down. There have been a few shining moments of Christmas bliss: watching my kids laugh hysterically with their cousins in my rearview mirror while we sat in traffic on our way to finish some Christmas shopping, and helping all the grandkids make ornaments to decorate my mother’s Christmas tree. But for the most part, it’s been screaming and gnashing of teeth around here. As I drove the 200 miles to Alabama, I had plenty of time to listen to Christmas music and I began to wonder, “Where is the music for my people?” My people don’t start Christmas shopping until December 1st and have no idea how to safely roast a chestnut on an open fire. My people love Christmas and spending time with their families, but are ready to climb into a snowy cave on a mountainside in Whoville by Christmas morning. I mean, really? Silent Night? Not at my mother’s house. We’d be lucky to hear a tornado siren going off, much less cattle lowing. It took us around three hours to wrestle five kids into makeshift beds on every flat surface in the house. There’s a reason there’s no place like Home for the Holidays— and I’m pretty sure it has to do with screaming babies and toddlers that can climb out of Pack ‘n Plays. Where are the songs that celebrate Christmas “Clark Griswold-style?” I couldn’t think of any, so in my free time, I jotted down a little ditty just for you––because you are my people. It’s in print, so you’ll have to sing it to yourself, but I think you’ll get the idea.

Mommy’s 12 Days of Christmas On the 12th day of Christmas my three kids gave to me: 12 days out of school, 11 days trapped inside, 10 babysitters, 9 days of shopping, 8 cars a’honking, 7 time outs, 6 Christmas parties, 5 DEAD…GOLDFISH, 4 doctor’s visits, 3 co-pays, 2 ear infections, And a trip to the loooooooney bin. Merry Christmas to all and to all a—wait, I think I hear somebody. Y Robin O’Bryant is mother to three daughters, wife to one husband, and debut author of Ketchup Is A Vegetable And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves. She shares the drama and hilarity of motherhood in her syndicated family humor column, “Robin’s Chicks” and on her blog by the same name (www.robinschicks.com).

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let’s talk it over by ARIEL ANDERTON, MT, MA, LPC, LMF

Gifting a Full Love Tank hristmas is in honor of Jesus: the greatest gift given to us, so we give gifts to each other to celebrate.

When giving gifts, you probably focus most on the kids in your life—whether your own kids or extended family. Parents, I expect your gift list for your child does not have things like “say ‘no’ to them,” “limit their time with their electronics,” or “highlight how their opinion is different from yours.” Though you likely already have some version of these things in your parenting, you might think of these as just a necessity. But these boundaries are an essential gift, because your kids will need them in order to hold on to the love you give them. Remember when your kids were little babies and you would put a toy out in front of them and they would reach for it? Then you would put the toy behind your back and your baby would forget it existed, because they did not understand object permanence yet. Something similar happens around feeling loved. At first, your kids feel loved only when you’re right there loving on them, but when you leave they start to feel insecure and cry for you to come back. As they develop and gain experience of your leaving and coming back to love on them again and again, they start to be able to hold that love feeling even when you’re not right there in front of them being loving. Including boundaries is another key to growing this ability inside your kids. Their experience of boundaries becomes like a holding container inside of them, a vessel to pour love into. Without an adequate loveholding tank inside, your children can be loved and adored, but it will leak

out as soon as there is a pause—or something less than ideal happens. You want them to be able to hold on to all the love you’re giving them when they are gone for a school day, a camping weekend, or a mission trip. Increasing their experiences of boundaries with you will increase the size of their love tank. And like a bank account, the more they can hold in the account, the more interest will accumulate, so they will start being able to give love and care to themselves too. So what are boundaries again? Boundaries are defined as where you end and someone else begins. You are made up of thoughts, emotions, physical parts, relationships, experiences, etc. So whether you’re saying “no”, affirming how their opinion differs, or how they feel that way, you’re showing your kids how they are separate people from you and building the tank for love inside. You may be thinking “my teenager is doing the separate-from-us thing pretty well,” but they need regular feedback that you see their differences and still value them. Though your kids probably won’t say “thank you for the gift” when you include boundaries year round, be confident that you’re building the ability for them to feel loved in your absence or in the midst of difficulty. You are growing their ability to feel loved always. Merry Christmas! Y Ariel Anderton, MT, MA, LPC, LMFT, is the child & adolescent therapist for Summit Counseling. She and her family have lived in the area since 2006.

Now I can...

keep up with my kids

It was the scariest Halloween ever for registered nurse Hollie Harvey. While on a family hayride, Hollie fell under the wheels of a wagon and broke her back. Surgeons predicted she would never walk again. But staff at Methodist Rehab said: “Let’s see what you can do.” And with their support and guidance, the Magee mother of three gave it her all and got back on her feet. “When they would tell me to do 10 reps I would do 20,” she said. “I wanted to be able to kick a ball with Hooks, Anna Grace and Honey Beth. That was my motivation.”

specializing in care for stroke, spinal cord injury, brain injury and amputation. An amazing United Methodist ministry of recovery and hope—supported by an exceptional team of caregivers. For information, visit methodistonline.org or call 601-364-3434 or toll-free 1-800-223-6672, ext. 3434. metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 23

➺salt & light

by MARILYN TINNIN, JASON HESTER, CHRISTY SOLOVECHIK, NANCY FLOWERS and MARLA BAKER

GIFT GIVING

from His Heart to Ours Truly He taught us to love one another; His law is love and His gospel is peace. O Holy Night!

In the middle of the rush—and the pressure of again locating that unique something for the person who already has more stuff than he wants, needs, or has room to store—why not consider giving a gift in honor of that person? And to give to someone who has absolutely no means of giving to you in return? We offer a few of our favorite suggestions! In a tough economy, when the family purse is tight, imagine the squeeze on those organizations that rely on the generosity of others to meet overwhelming needs. John 13:35 says, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” Giving is a tangible witness of that most precious kind of selfless love and a testimony of its power and purpose in the lives of believers. And, yes, all of our suggestions are tax deductible.

drinking water. Largely agricultural and rural, the landscape is populated here and there with small villages of a few hundred people where livestock roam freely and everyone—animals and people alike—shares the same water source. Hygiene is poor. In Malawian households, the average woman spends 26% of her time collecting water for her family— walking as far as three or four miles to draw water that is frequently contaminated. Over 30,000 people lose their lives every year to waterrelated illnesses, and most of these lives are children. Clean Water for Malawi is an organization headquartered right here in Jackson. Since its beginning in 2011, the ministry has been able to drill 56 wells in the country. Each well will provide clean water for approximately 347 people. $3,500 will drill an entire well, but $70 will provide water to one family, $350 will provide water to five families, and $1,750 will sponsor half of one well that supplies water to an entire community. Visit www.cleanwaterformalawi.org or contact 601.208.0936 or info@cleanwaterformalawi.org.

Clean Water for Malawi

Restoration Hope

Malawi, a land-locked country in Southeastern Africa and sandwiched between Zambia, Mozambique and Tanzania, is home to 15.8 million people—85% of whom are Christians. There are three metropolitan cities in Malawi, but 85% of the citizens live in rural areas, and 52% of them survive on less than $1 each day. Life expectancy is only 50 years and the infant mortality rate is one of the highest in the world. A major contributor to the dismal statistics is the lack of access to safe

Restoration Hope is a 501(c)(3) organization based in Jackson, MississippiWe resource local-based work in South Africa that honors the Father, encourages the saints, strengthens the weak, and restores the hope of the fatherless. An estimated 5.6 million people were living with HIV/AIDS in South Africa in 2009–more than in any other country worldwide—and the province of KwaZulu-Natal has the highest infection rate in the country. The impact of the AIDS pandemic on children is appalling. Because children born in South Africa are extremely likely to have a parent infected with the virus, the chances of them being orphaned due to AIDS is astronomical. In fact, it is estimated that worldwide, more than 16 million children have been orphaned because of AIDS. The latest estimates show that South Africa is home to over 1,900,000 AIDS orphans. Restoration Hope works in an impov-erished community in the

– Charles Haddon Spurgeon.

What are you giving for Christmas this year?

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601.985.9120 • 800.880.7606 • Colonnades, Suite 603 • 501 Marshall St. • Jackson, MS 39202 • eyegroupms.com 24 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

The Miles Corporation Traumatic brain injury (TBI) is a serious public health problem in the United States. Each year, traumatic brain injuries contribute to a substantial number of deaths and cases of permanent disability. Recent data shows that, on average, approximately 1.7 million people sustain a traumatic brain injury annually. When Brad Jones almost lost his life in a car accident in 2002, he was left with a new “normal” because of his TBI. There was really no longterm care facility available in Mississippi. The cost of care for a TBI patient is astronomical, and there is no one-size-fits-all rehabilitation fix. Brad’s mother, Mary Bates, became a determined champion and warrior for proper treatment and rehabilitation for victims of TBI. Her son defied the prognosis the doctors had given him. He even completed an associate’s degree in Liberal Arts from Holmes Community College. Founded in 2007, the Miles Corporation is a 501(c)(3) organization that includes a transitional home, a transportation service, and a degree of rehabilitative training for TBI victims. To date, Mary has cared for more than 31 people whose lives were pulled out from under them because of a TBI. Miles’ New Freedom Transportation Service has been made possible through a federal grant and the MS Department of Transportation. She says, “If one of our community wants to go to a movie, see a friend, go to a restaurant, or to a store for shopping, New Freedom is there.” Simple excursions like these are impossible for those with the disabilities that Mary cares for every day. The primary fundraiser for Miles is selling their homemade peanut brittle. It can be purchased on their website, but they are always looking for retail outlets to help provide more exposure. Miles has operated on a shoestring since its inception, but, by God’s grace and Mary Bates’ perseverance, many have felt that they got their lives and a great degree of independence back. There is hardly anything Miles wouldn’t appreciate–any donation is huge to Mary. She has a great ability to stretch a dollar. Volunteers are always needed to help make the peanut brittle, to drive residents, to help with bookkeeping, or perform handyman-type jobs around the residence. See http://www.milescorp.org or contact Mary at 601.826.1859.

province of KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa, called Sweetwaters, which lies at the epicenter of the destructive HIV/ AIDS pandemic. It is estimated that as much as 50% of the population has HIV or AIDS. Poverty is rampant and the area is characterized by poor housing, a limited supply of essential services, and high levels of unemployment. Tradi-tional family and community structures are disintegrating as families are forced to restructure. There is an escalation in the number of children made vulnerable and orphaned. In Sweetwaters alone, there are an estimated 6,000 children living in child-headed households. People in the community face HIV-related stigma, social ostracism, lack of social support, poor education or no education at all, and family, economic, and social difficulties. You can get involved with Restoration Hope by supporting us financially, joining us on a short-term trip to serve in South Africa, serving on a committee for an event, or by allowing us to speak to your organization. If you have a heart to get involved with the amazing work that is taking place in South Africa, please contact me at jasonhester@restorationhope.org. To find out more about Restoration Hope, the work we support, and our local partners in South Africa please visit us at www.restorationhope.org or like us on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/restorationhope.

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Fellowship of Christian Athletes The mission of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes is to present to coaches and athletes, and all whom they influence, the challenge and adventure of receiving Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord, serving Him in their relationships, and in the fellowship of the church. We have been so blessed to have the opportunity to be on junior high, high school, and college campuses all across Mississippi sharing the Gospel through on-campus Huddle Meetings and other events. Mississippi FCA has grown tremendously over the past few years. We currently have over 30 staff serving as missionaries on more than 350 campuses throughout the state. Their tireless efforts have led many coaches, athletes, and students to make life-changing decisions to follow Christ and then use their influence to lead others to Christ. Locally, we have three staff in the Metro Area serving on the campuses of the schools in this area. They are Lester Walls, Kiel Higginbotham, and Swayze Waters. One of our most impactful projects has been the Mississippi FCA Bible Project. In 2006, the Mississippi FCA State Executive Board was inspired to raise money to place an FCA Coach’s Bible in the hands of every coach in Mississippi. We were able to raise the money quickly and gave out over 6,000 Bibles that first year. Then, FCA produced the FCA Competitor’s Bible and the idea was promoted to have booster clubs or local churches raise money to provide each athlete on their campus with a Bible. Athletes from South Panola High School, who attended our 2011 summer Leadership Camp and heard this idea, were inspired to go back home and impact their campus by making sure EVERY student on campus received a Bible. They gave out over 2,000 Bibles and have created a plan that will allow future FCA Leaders to give out Bibles to the students of South Panola. Other students and coaches are catching this vision and working to make this happen on their campuses. Since 2009, we have given out nearly 13,000 FCA Competitor’s Bibles and 8,000 Coach’s Bibles. We continue to see God’s hand at work through this project and other events and activities provided through the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. For more information, contact us at 601856-3224, or visit us online at www.fcams.org.

We Will Go Ministries: Loving Jesus and Loving People The love of Jesus changes people. It does. Since 2005, We Will Go (WWG) has been loving people in downtown Jackson, and we’re seeing lives made new, addictions broken, families reunited, and hope restored. Jesus has grown WWG from one family and one house to 30 missionaries, 12 houses, a clothing shop, and a community garden. Base 1, at the corner of North Congress and Barksdale Streets, includes four houses, our food and clothing ministries, and a worship pavilion. Base 2 is in the historic Farish Street District, with eight houses and a community garden. Every day Jesus brings hungry hearts to our doors so we can share His love and truth as, we also share the food and clothing He provides. He also sends hundreds of visitors and volunteers every month who come to help us pack food bags, hang up clothes, and restore our formerly condemned houses. People come to help, but are surprised to find that, in serving Jesus, His love has healed and restored them. WWG also has a base in Tacna, Peru, where missionaries care for abused and abandoned children, and children belonging to inmates of the nearby women’s prison. WWG Peru has one missionary family, two 26 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

houses, three interns, and three Peruvian “moms” who share Jesus’ love with seven children. If Jesus leads you to share, here are some things we always need: • Food – pop-top canned items, such as pastas, meats, vegetables, fruits, meaty soups • Clothing – gently worn casual clothes, especially for men; new socks and underwear for men and women; toiletries, such as shampoo, soap, toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant • Financial gifts – used to supply daily needs for the poor, building materials for restoring houses, garden supplies, Bibles, traveling expenses mission trip to carry the Gospel to places like Peru, Africa, the Middle East, and China. All financial gifts to WWG are tax deductible. For more information, visit www.wewillgo.org and www.wewillgoperu.org. “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Luke 6:38).

Be a Santa to a Senior The power of a single gift can be life changing. The gift of Christ to this world is the most extraordinary gift that God gave us on earth. And so we take God’s example and celebrate the spirit of Christ through giving—one gift at a time. “Be a Santa to a Senior” was based on this premise. We know there are many wonderful projects and options of giving to children, but this community outreach was born out of the realization that seniors are needy and overlooked at this time of year. The project is much like the Angel Tree program, but instead of the angel ornaments representing children, the ornaments represent senior adults. The names of the seniors are qualified then submitted by the CMPDD Medicaid waiver program. Locally, the project began in 2004 with only 100 names on one tree at Wal-Mart in Clinton. This year, we are helping 1,000 seniors in the metroJackson area. Multiple trees have been up since the second week in November at many Kroger and Wal-Mart stores. Nationally, the project has given over 1.5 million gifts to seniors since it began in 2004, and was featured on NBC Nightly News in 2011. Here’s how to help: 1. Find the nearest Be A Santa to a Senior tree location by visiting http://www.beasantatoasenior.com or by texting “Santa” to 601-574-4155. 2. Receive an ornament from the tree 3. Purchase the gift 4. Bring ornament and gift back to participating store or location by December 10 Franchise owner, Darron Byrd, extends an invite to our annual wrapping party at 807 Monroe Street Clinton, MS, on December 14, from 10 a.m.-12 p.m. Holiday refreshments will be provided while we wrap gifts collected for seniors. Y

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Teddy DiBiase, Jr. WrestleMania Hero With a Heart for God Steven Smith, College Pastor at First Baptist Church in Jackson, has discipled and mentored Teddy DiBiase since he was a freshman at Mississippi College in 2001. He calls him “a true man after God’s own heart,” and adds, “Now with over 200,000 twitter followers, he has a continued role in the largest entertainment industry in the world. He is doing some amazing things as a Christian in a very secular entertainment industry.” ed (“Teddy”) DiBiase, Jr., grew up in his father’s shadow, proud of who he was and eager to follow in his footsteps. Ted DiBiase, Sr., the “Million Dollar Man,” was one of the biggest names in the World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) organization while his three sons were growing up. Living in Clinton, Mississippi, the family enjoyed a very normal small town life despite the fame of the father. However, Ted, Sr.’s career in WWE almost cost him his marriage and his family, and he was adamant that his sons not spend a single day pursuing the career that was rife with temptations and a lack of accountability. Forty years ago, wrestlers enjoyed something of a rock star lifestyle. Drugs, infidelity, a hard fast life on the road––it was all part of wrestling. Teddy’s mom, Melanie, was not blind or deaf to any of it even though her sons had no idea. Ted, Sr., called one day from the road to tell Melanie that he was on his way home, and she surprised him by telling him, “No. You don’t live here anymore.” What a sobering wakeup call that was! With counseling and a completely fresh and real commitment to Christ, the DiBiases did put their marriage back together. Teddy describes a radical change in his father as he began to seek Christ with a hunger he had never had before. “I wish other people could know my dad the way I do and to see the complete transformation from the big star to the guy he

28 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Ted in the ring where it is part performance, part entertainment, and lots of skill and grit.

became after that. It was just amazing the way he began to talk about character and integrity and the certain qualities he started to instill in his children––those things are the things that really molded me, and the things I can fall back on, and the things I will never forget.” Ted, Sr. began to speak publicly about his journey from the bleached-blonde, barrelchested, wrestler role he had once played to the redeemed and restored husband and father he is today. God used his willingness to speak in powerful ways. He eventually became an ordained minister and today heads Heart of David Ministry––an evangelistic organization that encourages and challenges men and women to become dedicated followers of Christ. Living about twenty minutes away from his son, he is a font of wisdom and encouragement for Teddy. He is also a doting grandfather to six-month-old Tate McKinley DiBiase.

The Extremist Teddy calls himself an “extremist,” smiling as he explains that he just never does anything halfway. Following the themes of good versus evil that framed the backdrop for the wrestling exhibitions, he developed a strong desire to live and breathe adventure. Even as a child,

his ambitions were anything but dull. If wrestling was out of the question, maybe he would become a Navy Seal. After his father’s conversion and subsequently his own, he even thought about becoming a missionary. Teddy’s prayer was a little unusual, however, as he prayed that God would send him to the darkest place in the world––a mission field where nobody else wanted to go. He was a great fan of the apostle Paul. In his young mind, he focused on Paul’s daring escapes and great tests of faith and strength. “I was drawn to the thought that it would be exciting as a human being to endure so much and to experience God’s ability to supply the endurance and the strength.” At that time, Teddy’s idea of the darkest place on earth was a jungle in an untamed wilderness. Instead, God’s plans involved another dark place––the entertainment industry through World Wrestling Entertainment, the largest professional wrestling promotion in the world. He had almost relinquished his childhood fantasy of wrestling out of respect for his dad’s strong desire that none of his son’s choose that road. While Teddy was completing his college education at Mississippi College and trying to

decide what he was going to do with his Bachelor of Science and Bachelor of Business Administration degrees, the WWE asked his father to come back in Kristen and Teddy have been a a behind-the-scenes couple since their first days at role to help with Clinton High School. production, and to help mentor the younger talent coming up. A lot of good changes had transpired during the decade or so that he had been out of the business. Teddy explains that The milestones in their the WWE became a publicly traded company relationship go back to Senior and cleaned up its image a great deal. They Prom days! Kristen and Teddy married at Lake Caroline on began to gear their product toward children October 30, 2008. and families. Gone were the halfnaked women and the beer drinking and foul language that had characterized the previous years. opportunity was the springboard to Another change involved drug testing the career he had dreamed of his and other procedures that provided entire life. It was also the place he for more accountability. The entire was going to find out what real testing environment had been cleaned up. looked like, and he was going to find Ted DiBiase, now an evangelist, was out that he was not the invincible man now less adamant that his son not of God that he had so naively thought follow in his footsteps. he would be. With his father’s blessing, Ted, Jr., Six months after his television took his final exam of his senior year debut, his managers at WWE told him and did not wait to march in the they wanted him to read for a part in a graduation procession. Instead, he left made-for-DVD movie, Marine II. the very next day for Harley Race’s Thinking he was probably going to be Wrestling Academy in Eldon, Missouri. some kind of extra, he looked at the Race, a retired professional wrestler script once or twice before the Teddy and fellow wrestler, brother Brett, inducted their dad, and former World Heavyweight audition, but he told himself he was Ted DiBiase, Sr., “The Million Dollar Man,” into the WWE Hall Champion, had trained both Ted, Sr., really going to go for it. He gave it all of Fame on March 27, 2010. and Teddy’s grandfather, “Iron” Mike he had performing in three different DiBiase. was a combination of being away from home scenes. A week later he got a call that he had Although Teddy had never had the and the fact that the weather was cold that the part. opportunity to do any wrestling––he had been gave him the incentive to learn what he “Cool,” he said, “Which one?” He nearly the quarterback on Clinton High School’s needed to learn as quickly as possible. He dropped the phone when the reply came back, football team and he had played years of worked odd jobs stocking groceries, cutting “The lead character.” Ted DiBiase, Jr., could soccer––as a natural athlete, he picked up the fabric in a Polo outlet, and cleaning a gym now add “actor” to his resume. moves fairly quickly. The most difficult thing while he completed the course in an unheard His star status soared. He was traveling the about the sport is learning to tolerate the pain, of 10-months time. world, wrestling before hundreds of millions of Ted says. Although there is a great deal of people, being asked for his autograph acting involved in the story line and the The Career wrestlers do try to protect each other to some After a brief stint with Pro Wrestling Noah, everywhere he went, seeing his character in action figures and video games––it was all quite extent, the falls are real and the injuries are Ted got a call from the WWE offering him a heady for a 25-year-old from Clinton, inevitable. contract. He headed to Tampa and their Mississippi. He had prayed for testing, and it He says, “I was very motivated to complete developmental facility, Florida Championship was all around him, but he failed to recognize it the program which usually takes anywhere Wrestling (FCW). Something akin to a until he almost self-destructed. from 18 months to two years to complete.” It baseball minor league farm club, this metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 29

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“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If any one loves the world, love for the Father is not in him.” I John 2:15. In February 15, 2008, Teddy was arrested for DUI in Hillsborough County, Florida. Fortunately, when he crashed his SUV into another vehicle, no one was seriously injured. He was released on bond, the press carried the story everywhere, and what he calls “the worst day of my entire life” became a turning point of monumental proportions, as well as an experience he shares in frequent speaking engagements before youth groups. Teddy reflects on that season of life with a generous amount of transparency and spiritual maturity. “It was soon after the action movie that I began to lose my focus and I started to believe my own press. I enjoyed all that stuff way too much. I had started to climb that ladder of success, and I was never satisfied. My priorities had shifted. Kristen and I were not married then, and I was away from home, away from the friends who held me accountable.” Teddy’s conversation is filled with the word, “accountability.” He is quick to point out that it matters who your friends are because you become like the people you spend your time with whether you intend to or not. If he had just disciplined himself to stay in touch with those relationships from his past, the friends who did not mind asking him the tough questions and holding him accountable, he thinks he would not have made the series of poor decisions that resulted in his arrest. “Still to this day,” Teddy says, “it is terrifying to me when I think back on that incident and that God had blessed me with so much. I let my family down. I let my friends down. I let

everyone down around me when I wasn’t living what I professed. Now, however, that experience has become a tool because I can talk to kids and can relate to them. I understand the struggle and the deceptions they grapple with, and I understand what peer pressure is, too.”

Turning a Failure into a Victory Just like the prodigal son in Luke 15, Teddy quickly “came to himself.” It took little more than a look at himself in the mirror to remember who he was, what his real values were, and how hungry he was to be back in fellowship with the Lord he had long professed, and the close friends who had been part of his spiritual support system. He made a 180-degree turn. Success has continued to mark his career path, but his perspective changed as he began to view his career as a platform for giving credit to God––and as an open door to speak out as a Believer to a wide and diverse audience. Whether he is speaking to a church youth group, a cancer ward at Blair Batson Children’s hospital, or a school assembly, Teddy possesses a great gift of communicating the gospel message and reaching out to each person he meets. “I’ve been down the dark road,” he says. “I’ve also done most everything the world says is cool. I’ve lived both places without seeking God, and either way I was totally miserable. There is nothing in this world, nothing at all, that matters as much as your relationship with Jesus Christ.” Just this year, Teddy, along with a few of his best friends, organized The Ted DiBiase Foundation. A 501(c)(3), the purpose is to provide what Teddy calls “Be Happy”

experiences for special needs children, disabled or wounded soldiers, or others who would like to come to a wrestling event. The group arranges transportation, pictures with the wrestlers both backstage and in the ring, and a gift package to make the day memorable. A second focus for the new foundation will be a leadership program that brings together metro-area, high school youth for projects and special events––inspiring and encouraging them to be those leaders who stand for character and integrity. He dreams of creating a leadership team, of providing real-life experiences that help ground them before they go to college and have no one to hold them accountable. Jordan Ash, a Jackson attorney, who has been Ted’s lifelong friend, is one of the foundation’s board members. Their friendship goes back to four-year-old kindergarten. Ted’s desire to start a foundation that helps other people came as no surprise to Jordan. He says, “The one thing that always sticks in my mind about Teddy is how he treats people. He is one of the most humble guys I know, and he doesn’t let the success he has achieved affect the way he lives his life. I am most proud that

he has decided to use his success to make a difference in people’s lives for Christ. He wanted to show God’s love to people, kids especially, by taking advantage of the public platform he has been given by God.”

Ted’s Future Ted is 30 years old, but when he lists the injuries he has suffered in his brief career as a wrestler, it is clear that the physical wear and tear on the body has been enormous. Dislocated shoulders, torn labrum, bone spurs, broken wrist, broken ankle, torn ACL, fractured knee—sounds more like he has been to war than to WWE! Even so, he enjoys what he does and considers himself so blessed to have had the chance to live his dream. His career has provided well for his family. However, he and Kristen welcomed Tate McKinley DiBiase into their family this past May, and life on the road is less attractive than it was previously. Wrestling is a 52-weeks-ofthe-year sport, and he does not like being away. The WWE sets his itinerary, and he is gone for weeks at a time, spending each night on the road in a different city and often a different country as well!

A new season for the DiBiases may be just around the corner. He cites his favorite scripture, Matthew 6:33, “But seek ye first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well.” He and Kristen have been praying to find a way for him to be home more. “I want more than anything to be a father and to be here for Tate and for her. God let me do this job. He says he will give you the desires of your heart, and I prayed that God would send me to the darkest place there was, and He did both.” But he adds that he has a new dream today, and that would be to be the very best husband and father, by God’s grace, he can be. “One of the things I love doing is sharing my testimony—and not for any recognition but because it gives God the glory, and I can say publicly that I would never have been able to do any of these things I have been blessed to do except that He allowed me to.” It looks like Teddy’s heart is firmly planted in missions, but he might be giving up the “darkest place in the world,” for one that is equally challenging right here at home. There are a lot of kids, including his own, who are going to be incredibly blessed by that fact! Y

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metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 31

➺food for thought

“My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of Him that sent me, and to finish His work.” – John 4:34

by LYDIA BOLEN

Delicious Gifts holiday season is a time of gatherings with T hechurch, family, friends, and co-workers.

Gift exchanges are part of a wonderful tradition we all look forward to each year. And edible gift giving is always a welcome choice! These three recipes are favorites my family has shared through the years. Jezebel Sauce is a delicious dipping sauce for turkey or ham on your holiday table. It can also be spread on cream cheese as an

CHEESE BALL 1 pound Cheddar Cheese (I prefer the extra-sharp) 1 pound American cheese 6 ounces Cream Cheese 2 tablespoons Worcestershire 1 teaspoon Tabasco 1 large clove garlic, crushed Coverings: paprika and chili powder blend, parsley flakes, or crushed nuts Mix cheeses together and add Worcestershire sauce, Tabasco, and crushed garlic. Chill this mixture until firm. Shape mixture into several medium size balls. Roll balls in equal parts of paprika and chili powder, dried parsley flakes, or crushed nuts.

appetizer. It’s great with egg rolls too! This sauce can be given in clear jelly jars and wrapped with colorful raffia or ribbon. Peppermint Bark is especially festive with the red of the crushed peppermint and white chocolate. The bark can be made in advance and presented in decorative seasonal tins. My mother’s cheese balls are the perfect gift for entertaining. This recipe makes several cheese balls, which can be wrapped in colored saran and tied up with ribbon for an attractive presentation.

JEZEBEL SAUCE 1 1 1 1 1

(18-ounce) jar pineapple preserves (18-ounce) jar apple jelly small can dry mustard small jar of horseradish tablespoon cracked black pepper

Combine all ingredients in food processor. Blend well. Put sauce into jars and refrigerate.

PEPPERMINT BARK 2 packages (16-ounce) white candy coating 1 pound starlight peppermints or candy canes, crushed (Try mixing green candy canes to the red for a red and green appearance.) Prepare the work surface by laying out wax paper or parchment paper across the counter, securing ends with tape to prevent curling. Melt the candy coating in microwave (use plastic bowl) on medium or defrost setting. Stir after each minute with spatula. Once completely melted and smooth, add the crushed peppermints to the melted candy coating, stirring well. Immediately pour onto wax paper and spread thin, using an offset spatula. Allow it to harden about 45 minutes. Break into pieces and store in airtight containers. Will keep fresh up to one month. Note: (I like to use Merckens White Chocolate Wafers, which can can be found at local bakers’ supply stores.) Y

Remember to make memories through the kitchen— “the heartbeat of the home.” E-mail me at lbbolen@gmail.com for any questions. 32 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

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➺think tank by ANDY WIMBERLY

Accents The Energizer Bunny Ain’t Real

Southern

Accents A Gift Boutique

Ever feel like the “Energizer Bunny,” but your battery is running low? We are all so busy that we get addicted to the habit of being busy. Once this busy habit is entrenched and in our veins, it keeps us away from the things that are most important: • Our health and our physical well-being; • Time to build or rebuild our spiritual relationship with JESUS; and • Quality time with our family. We are all just so busy--. Busy doing good things—really good things. Busy with our jobs, appointments, families, churches, hobbies, kids, grandkids, parents, traveling, tailgating,

Don’t let your BUSY get in the way of your spiritual and physical health, or your relationships with God and family.

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Southern Accents Ridgeland 34 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

cooking, cleaning, mowing, and just doing and doing and doing. There is nothing wrong with being busy. I always have too much going on and that’s OKAY for those of us that enjoy that, but don’t let your BUSY get in the way of your spiritual and physical health, or your relationships with GOD & family. We spend so much time being busy we miss what is most important. Today, let’s take the challenge of finding time to work on important area # 1—our health & physical well-being—and develop some new habits that will make us feel, act, and look better! I know what you’re thinking: “Andy, this sounds good but I don’t have the time – I’M TOO BUSY!”

Jim Sones, a friend and well-known and respected gastroenterologist, said to me a few weeks ago, “Andy, what if there were a pill that would lower your blood pressure, improve your cholesterol, relieve tension, help you lose weight, make you feel and look better, give you more confidence and increase your energy level? Would you buy it? Would you take it?” “Of course,” I answered, “but there is no such pill is there? Where would we get such a pill?” Jim said, “It is already available—it’s called EXERCISE!” Jim went on to say that it has been proven that exercise, even just a little bit every day, would provide the health benefits that this imaginary “MAGIC pill” would. We’re not talking about completing an Iron Man, running in a marathon, or taking a spin class five times a week—we’re referring to simple exercises such as: • Stretching for five minutes each morning; • Taking a walk around the block; • Riding your bike around your neighborhood; • Not taking the easy way out—take the stairs instead of the elevator, and walk to your mailbox instead of driving. No one would be “too busy” to swallow that “MAGIC pill.” In fact, it would probably be flying off the shelves. So, why not try a few of these simple steps that have the ability to give you the same results? Break old habits and make new habits! Take time to take care of yourself. Stop the addiction of TOO BUSY and spend some time taking care of YOU! I promise you will be amazed at the results, and your family and friends will be amazed too. Y Wimberly & Associates provides executive coaching and financial advising. They use The Discovery Process™ for clearer thinking to assist people and businesses in transition and in life. Email him at andy@thediscoveryprocess.com

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➺let’s get real by JANIE PILLOW

Conflict: His and Hers onight I came in from work all ready to write this article. Last night I read Max Lucado’s little book, The Greatest Gift. It is a

heartwarming little story of the first Christmas. I put a lot of CDs in my player and sat down ready to write a warm, fuzzy, and inspiring article on Christmas. I was listening to “Silent Night” and all the Christmas classics. Then I reflected on the day I’d had in counseling. Many of the sessions were very painful for the clients—both individuals and couples. These poor people were anything but joyful, peaceful, and looking forward to a wonderful Christmas season. Their hearts were broken, angry, disillusioned, or anything other than what my music was expressing. Thus, I decided I would write on how to turn conflict into happiness and try to give some insight on conflict. Realizing that I could write page after page on this, I started trying to come up with some salient points that might help. People don’t get married hoping that in the years to come they can grow apart and be hurtful to their partner. They don’t wake up one morning and say, “I think I will make my life miserable.” They just don’t know better choices to make. So, they do the best they can, and when that doesn’t work, they try what didn’t work harder. If I call conflict a struggle to connect, would you think I was nuts? But that is really what it is. Or more specifically, it’s a method people use to try and be heard and understood. Here is the trick. God put you with the one perfect person that will help you grow and mature. Proverbs 27:17 states that “as iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Years ago, my husband and I had just graduated from college and moved back to a town close to where I grew up. I knew so many people there and was thrilled to see them. I flitted around from person to person hugging and doing brief catching up. My husband was from Greenwood, and there may have one or two people he knew there. When we got in the car to leave, he said, “Have you ever stopped to think people don’t want to know everything you know?” Well, as far as reputations went, his for verbosity far exceeded mine. Wow—did I have a thousand comebacks spinning around in my head as I was filled with dismay! I sat there and gathered myself, or should I say, God’s grace. I could easily have spoiled the evening with my comebacks (remember, the last person to speak 36 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

When people fight or complain, usually there is a deeper issue under “the thing,” or “the thing is not the thing.” It’s not about the toothpaste.

determines the way the conversation goes). So, my thought process went like this: this man is supposed to love me more than anyone in the world. And when I could finally speak, I said, “No, to tell you the truth I have never wondered that. But obviously, you have. Tell me more about your thoughts and especially your feelings.” After doing a lot of inquiring to understand, I realized I had hurt his feelings by abandoning him in the midst of strangers. I probably would have felt the same way at a big gala in Greenwood. I learned something that night about both of us that I put to work in my practice. When people fight or complain, usually there is a deeper issue under “the thing” or “the thing is not the thing.” It’s not all about the toothpaste. That is a symptom of primary feelings of something negative or discounted underneath the secondary reaction.

Now guys, I hate to tell you this, but you have probably already experienced the phenomena. It’s usually the women that bring the issue to the table. Most men take the “I’m fine” approach (i.e. Feeling Inside Not Expressed). They are more allergic to conflict than women. Reason being, women’s brains are different from men. Women’s brains can more easily get in touch with emotions and are more equipped (biologically) than men to express their feelings. So, men reason, why bother to get into a verbal debate when I’m probably going to lose. Thus, women are usually the pursuer when there is an issue that is coming between them. What do men do? They take the approach that the best offense is a good defense. They flood, freeze, stonewall, or get defensive. What happens next? The woman thinks he is disinterested in her feelings. She chases him around the house saying the same thing a dozen different ways trying to get him to “understand how she feels.” You know the cycle—the more she pursues, the more he distances, until it’s late and he goes to bed. Man, now she is really furious. He can go in and sleep and she’s so upset. That proves he really doesn’t care. NOT SO. It has been scientifically proven that while she is seeing him as unaffected, his blood pressure is escalating; his heart rate goes up until he is just exhausted, and he hopes it will all be better in the morning.

single still, single again by AMY INGRAM

Steady My Heart Or he finally apologizes to shut her up. She accepts and forgives (word meaning not returning wrong for wrong). They recommit to work harder, but nothing has changed. Neither has learned anything about the other, and no one has grown in sanctification. It’s only buried until they have another conflict, which is usually harder because the original one has not yet been resolved. I can only be very brief because of space (and hope to continue this line of thought in a series of articles). But for now, I’ll give a few pointers to not leave you hanging. 1. Sit down before you start. Ask the other person if this is a good time for you to bring an issue up. 2. Soften your blame. Speak softly and slowly. Use “I” statements, not “you” statements. In using the “I” statements, try and frame them something like this: a. “When I notice” (Something) b. “I think it means” (Give your perspective on the offense. It’s usually not what they meant at all. Remember the message sent is usually not the message heard). c. “And I feel ________.” 3. Now that is what I call the “expresser.” And I call the listening person the “inquirer.” His role is to ask who, what, when, or how questions until the expresser feels truly understood. He should be able to say, “If I were you, and I saw it like that I would be hurt too.” (That’s always true. If you had her history, current circumstances, and biology, you would feel exactly like she does. (Remember you do not have to agree. Just get to a point that you truly understand her situation). Now this is guaranteed NOT to work if you don’t try it! But I ask you—is that the way your conflict usually goes? And what you have magically done is work together to solve the misunderstanding or problem, and not declare the other person the enemy. Feeling understood is very connective, and it’s certain to help. So next time someone makes you mad, say to yourself: they really need to be understood or they are trying to connect with me. Y Janie Pillow is in private practice at Janie Pillow Counseling (601- 8534788) She is also Co-founder of Third Millennium Ministries and has served since its inception as Chairman of the Board. See www.ThirdMill.Org. “Seminary Education for the World for Free.”

ast night, my mom and I packed up in Oxford, headed to Memphis, and prepared to board a plane to Cleveland, Ohio to see my brother, sisterin-law and their two boos. We were excited to have a direct flight into Cleveland, knowing in just two short hours we’d see our family and start celebrating Thanksgiving. As time passed in the airport, we noticed they kept pushing our departure time back due to a maintenance issue. It didn’t phase us, though, because we had a direct flight and knew we’d be there later that evening. We loaded the plane, piled in like sardines, and waited. First, we waited for cabin services to bring more drinks, and secondly for the crew to shut the plane door. My mom and I were sitting up front and noticed the flight attendant call the pilot out of the pit, “Do you think that door is shut? It’s not properly locking in that one area,” she said. After messing with it he said, “Yes, it should be fine. It’s locked.” And then the journey began. We took off and immediately noticed a few issues––the plane was incredibly hot and the air wasn’t working properly, the engines were running funny, and it seemed like we never hit the 10,000 feet mark (I feel confident we must have, it just felt like we were flying low). So somewhere over Indiana the pilot came on, “Folks, I have bad news. The door to the landing gear is telling us it’s not opening properly, and we are going to need to divert and land at the nearest airport. We won’t know until we get down what issues we are experiencing.” Meanwhile, we sat calmly and watched the flight attendant continue to answer the phone from the pilots and stare fearfully at the cabin door. They were able to land the plane safely at a closed airport in Indiana and we spent the night in the middle of a field, patiently waiting on a plane to come pick us up. The next morning we boarded the plane to head to Cleveland. As we prepared to take off, the pilot came on the loudspeaker, “Ladies and gentlemen, it’s going to be a rough flight. There will be no cabin service and we ask you use the bathroom now and tighten your seatbelts.” I started shaking. As if the

night before hadn’t been enough, here we are preparing to be bounced around the sky. I never have been one for rollercoasters. So here’s what you need to know about me. I have started hating flying. Even though I travel regularly, I find myself begging the Lord to get me down fast, but more importantly— steady the plane while we are in the sky. I had sent a text to three people begging them to pray for calm air and a steady airplane. And equally important––a calm and steady AMY. So as I braced myself for this turbulent flight, I began thinking about this. Is it more about me resting in knowing God’s in control, or believing in the miracle of Him quieting the air outside that airplane? We know He can issue one soft, sweet breath and tell the air to equalize, creating a much smoother ride for us; however, sometimes He doesn’t quiet the air. Instead He pushes us to learn how to be quiet in the longing and create steadfastness—in our hearts and minds. Today as we traveled on our last flight, I found myself singing the Kari Jobe song, over and over again:

Even when it hurts Even when it’s hard Even when it all just falls apart I will run to You Cause I know that You are Lover of my soul Healer of my scars You steady my heart I’m not gonna worry I know that You got me Right inside the palm of your hand Each and every moment What’s good and what gets broken Happens just the way that You plan This doesn’t just apply to bumpy planes and unstable air. Be steadfast in your wait. He steadies your heart, your mind, and your longings. Quite honestly, He’s the only stable, unwavering being that will never change. And He has you in the palm of His hand. Y Amy Ingram is a Senior Account Executive at a local advertising agency. She lives in Madison with her little boo, Mabel. Feel free to contact her at amyeingram@gmail.com and/or follow her on twitter @ingramjackson. metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 37

➺pastor’s perspective by JOHN HUGH TATE

From Coveting to Contentment

he holiday season is upon us. It’s a time for giving, receiving, and catching up with those dearest to us. It is also the time when we covet the most.

Coveting. What is it? The dictionary defines it as “to desire wrongfully” or “to wish for, especially eagerly.” Simply put, we covet what other people have. We covet what our neighbors have, whether they live across the street, work in our offices, attend our churches, or go to our parties. Coveting enters our thoughts as we say, “I wish I had their house. I wish I could take that trip to St. Croix. I wish I could give my children that gift. I wish our home could be decorated that way. I wish I had their job. I wish I could be invited to that party. I wish I had more money. I wish I lived in that zip code. I wish I had their status. I wish I had those friends. I wish—I had their life.” In the Ten Commandments, God establishes “you shall not covet your neighbor’s house, you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male servant, or his ox, or his donkey, or anything that is your neighbors” (Exodus 20: 17). A servant, ox, or donkey, we may not have. A country club membership, a flat screen TV, a Lexus, or J Crew suit, we may have. Or, we might not. And we can easily covet such things. It is in this season—when what we have, what we give, and what we receive are on full display—that we covet. Thus, it is so important to grasp the reality of the incarnation, God becoming flesh as Jesus Christ. Paul writes of this to the church at Philippi, and to us today, as he states, “Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born into the likeness of men” (Philippians 2: 5-7). God, in all His majesty, came to us, for us, to be with us, to save us. When we have Him, we have everything. There is nothing else we need. This passage from Paul takes on new meaning as we realize he penned these words while in prison. At that moment, in the eyes of the world, he had nothing. Yet he had everything. So he is able to claim, “I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:11-13). As followers of Jesus, we are called to be content. When He lives within us, we can be content in all things—whether we abound or have been brought low, whether we have abundance or need. In Christ, we can do all things by Him who strengthens us. When we covet, we believe the great lie that such things will bring us true fulfillment and happiness. Many have discovered, they will not. Only one thing, One Person, brings us purpose and fulfillment, even to a place where coveting simply does not exist. Who is He? He is the Child born in a donkey’s trough, to poor parents, who felt the cold

38 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

winter’s night in a stable, and yet to whom angels proclaimed and rejoiced at His birth. The question is not, “Do we covet?” It is, “What are we coveting?” And how do we move from coveting to true contentment? On December 26 or on January 2, many of us still will not be content. We wake up wishing our Christmas had some resemblance to It’s A Wonderful Life or Miracle on 34th Street. We enter our Christmas season with great expectations. We depart it with great regret. Instead, may we take time this season to reflect on what the incarnation, God with us, truly means for our life. That is, Christ came to bring us true contentment. Nothing else gives us what He offers. As we begin to walk with Him, we will enter a life more profound and adventurous than we dared dream or imagine. What a tremendous Christmas gift—to move from coveting to contentment! The Good News is all of us can have this gift. It is given when we, too, bow before the born and Risen Savior. At this place of humbly giving our lives away, we find the content life we were meant to live. So it was for Paul. So it can be for us. Y John Hugh Tate is a graduate of the University of Mississippi and Harvard Divinity School. He is Lead Pastor at Bellwether Church in Jackson. He is also the chaplain at Jackson Academy. He and his wife, Linda, are the parents of two sons, and he is presently working toward his Doctorate in Ministry at Fuller Theological Seminary.

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➺fresh finds

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40 NOVEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

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metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 41

➺education connection by JULIE CRUMP

Magnolia Speech School Passes the Torch Dr. Tina Atkins, Executive Director of Magnolia Speech Charlie Alexander was handed the unenviable task of pointing the Board School, feels like she moved through the 55 years of her life of Magnolia in the direction of a new executive director. Anne Sullivan, knowing God’s plan was for her to work on behalf of children. Executive Director, who had served Magnolia and the region for 32 Not just any child, but the child with no voice. She has taught, counseled, years, had determined she would retire at the end of 2012. and advocated for special needs children in public schools for more than With the Executive Director Search Committee–led by former Board 25 years. When she stepped out of the area of special education, her life Chair Brooks Buchanan, and consisting of Donna Kaye Byrd, Tommy was miserable. For her, this was a direct indicator from God that she had Darnell, David Landrum, Mitch Stringer and Dr. Ian Windmill–the moved herself out of His plan. As soon as she moved back into the area Board of Magnolia Speech School had a daunting challenge. It was of special education, her life became calm. (“For I quickly determined that the search should be know the plans I have for you,” declares the focused on both the local and national levels. LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm Word was disseminated far and wide via you, plans to give you hope and a future” publications, personal letters, and (Jeremiah 29:11). personal contacts. From an early age, God was preparing her to Certainly, knowledge of the local service area be the Executive Director of Magnolia Speech was deemed to be a key asset since fundraising, School. She holds a bachelor’s degree in Deaf educational, and administrative capabilities all Education and completed training in the seemed to weigh equally in the balance. The Mildred McGinnis Association Method (a part Committee knew from the beginning that it was of Magnolia’s curriculum). All of this, she feels, necessary to have a strong person of faith in the prepared her to be a better teacher for children role of executive director. Acquiring a new with a variety of disabilities. She furthered her interim executive director–in a rapid timeframe education in school counseling and received her that still allowed for a “shadowing period” of Ph.D. in School Administration—she should several months–was of paramount importance to know everything by now, right? Unfortunately, the Board and the Committee. Candidates were she did not. identified, interviews were held, and the Her first grandson arrived in June 2009. He intensive search was on. was perfect in every way. As time progressed, it “We were amazed when we were looking for was obvious his speech and language were not a new director earlier this year,” said Charlie developing appropriately. At age two, he was Alexander, 2012 Board Chair, “Both Brooks and not using words to communicate and could not I could see God’s hand steady at the till during express his wants or needs. The whole family this process!” was in deep denial regarding his developmental Since its humble beginnings in the founder’s progress. When Dr. Atkins finally realized home in 1956, Magnolia Speech School has something was not right, she knew the answers been considered a local ministry and mission. Passing the torch are Anne Sullivan, Outgoing should be within her; she would have the School founder, Elizabeth Matthews, Executive Director and Dr. Tina Atkins, new expertise to “fix” the problem. Through acknowledged her “calling” to found the school Executive Director with Elizabeth “Libba” searching, she and his parents located Magnolia Matthews (seated), school founder. in her memoirs, “My Father is Rich.” In it, she Speech School. They knew he was extremely relates that she dedicated the work to God and intelligent and thought he needed a little help. frequently went to her knees to pray for the At age two-and-one-half, he began attending MSS full time. children, the staff, and the future of the program. She shares that she MSS has offered Dr. Atkins’ grandson a safe and loving environment. had a great peace about the future of Magnolia even though she had no Experts there are working with him and other students to help them funding and no community support in the early days. She claimed the learn to speak for themselves. It was after she met the staff of Magnolia words of the old hymn, “My Father is Rich and will provide all my and observed their Center of Excellence as a grandmother, that she needs,” and to this day (she’s now 96 years of age) she attributes the found herself being considered to become Magnolia’s new executive school’s amazing success to the care of the Heavenly Father and the director. Longtime Magnolia Director, Anne Sullivan, observed, “God has angels He has sent to watch over it. Local churches, civic groups, and chosen Tina to lead this special program and continue this ministry. It is organizations have rallied around the school’s staff over the years, and my belief that the best is yet to come for Magnolia Speech School and Magnolia has become one of the most respected programs of its kind in the children we serve.” Dr. Atkins’ plans include bringing more/better the country. The school’s dependence on prayer and divine guidance was technology to the school, making Magnolia’s services accessible to more another reason Dr. Tina Atkins accepted the position as Executive of Mississippi’s children with communication disorders (through regional Director. She too has a deep and abiding faith that “where God guides, classrooms,) and partnering with the University of MS Medical Center to God will provide.” The Magnolia family believes that just as scripture strengthen both Magnolia’s Early Intervention and Clinical Services. records the miracles of Jesus, when the ears of the deaf were opened and It is remarkable how God has blessed and extended the outreach and the mute began to speak, with God’s good grace, such miracles will ministry of Magnolia just through the search for a new executive director. continue at 733 Flag Chapel Road in Jackson, Mississippi. Y After becoming the new Board Chairman of Magnolia in late 2011, 42 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

welcome home by SUZANNE TANNER

Craft Your Own Christmas Wreath At Metro Christian Living, we love Pinterest! There are so many wonderful ideas for recipes, crafts, do-it-yourself projects, inspirational ideas, decorating tips, and on and on and on! For the holidays, we thought we would share one of the great ideas we found for a fresh take on the Christmas wreath in a cheerful, red burlap. Grab your supplies and get going on your own today!

WHAT YOU WILL NEED • Burlap (About 1-1/2 yards) • Wreath base (12-inch ring used here) • Hot glue gun and glue sticks • Spray paint to match the color of your burlap 1. Spray paint the ring red so that the overall color of the wreath is uniform. If you don’t paint it, the base color could show through the burlap. 2. Cut burlap into 5-inch squares. 3. Fold burlap in half and then in half again. 4. Holding the folded corner, round off the top of the square. 5. Your burlap will then look like the photo. 6. Grab the center of the burlap and gather to look like a flower. 7. Snip off the folded point of the flower. 8. Apply hot glue to the tip. 9. Glue to the wreath base. 10. Repeat until your base is fully covered. Y

Heather Thoming is the creator, author, photographer, editor, bookkeeper and janitor of WhipperBerry––a place where she likes to take the simple things in life and make them beautiful. Visit www.whipperberry.com for more of her wonderful ideas!

metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 43

➺healthy living by MARILYN TINNIN

Exercise Plans that Fit Your Lifestyle have never made this a secret—I hate to sweat. Nevertheless, I have attempted to maintain some sort of fitness regimen over the past 100 (give or take a few) years. Until the past few years, it was all about vanity and about holding on to some distorted compulsion to be the same dress size I was when I graduated from high school. I was, like so many American women, intimidated by the whole aging process. I disliked and feared everything associated with the thought. I finally confronted the most depressing reality when my hours in the gym became few and far between. My metabolism slowed, and the pounds began to pile on. It took breast cancer and a brain aneurysm to change my perspective on exercise. It became a lifestyle necessity more than an obsession to disguise the fact that I am getting older. Americans spend about $42 billion annually on weight loss products, but 67% of us are overweight. In addition, 49% of us exercise for at least 30 minutes, Katie Black, one of numerous certified three times a week, and another and personalizes my fitness regimen. 18% give exercise a halfhearted, two-day-a-week effort. For all the hype and all the available health info, we should be doing better. The options these days are limitless for people like me who don’t get fired up at the thought of perspiring. We visited briefly with a few of our friends at The Club, a multi-location fitness center that is part of the

St. Dominic family. Take it from one who has learned the hard way. Exercise makes you feel great and maximizes every good thing about being alive. And like my doctor told me, it is not optional. I did something in 2012 I never thought I would do. Because I really do not like to sweat, I knew it was going to take more than my New Year’s resolution to hold me accountable, and so I invested in a personal trainer. It has been money well spent. The benefit of the personal trainer is a truly customized workout that takes into consideration individual issues, challenges, and limitations. My trainer, Katie Black, has a Personal Trainer Certification from the National Strength and Conditioning Association, and a Bachelor of Science in Sports Medicine and Exercise Science from Belhaven University. She has helped me stick with it, and we have focused on my individual concerns with the residual effects of my health trainers at The Club, customizes crises—my balance and coordination, and my overall strength. I have also had her expertise to be certain that I am using the machines and the weights correctly. It has been the perfect way for the non-athlete that I am to achieve a new level of fitness. Jillian Michaels I will never be, but I am becoming a healthier version of Marilyn. Lori Johnson is the Group Fitness Director at The Club. She advises

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that even if you work with a personal trainer several times a week, being part of a group on the remaining days keeps the momentum going and the exercise habit fresh. The leadership at The Club offers the Les Mills™ curriculum—a trademarked exercise program with a variety of classes— which offers something appealing for just about every personality and preference. Within the classes, highly-trained instructors offer different options that allow each participant to customize the workout to their own level of strength and agility. Lori adds that an added benefit for class participation is the sense of camaraderie that evolves. If anyone is looking for friends, an exercise class can be a great place for bonding and encouragement! Take a look at these offerings, and consider putting membership to The Club on your wish list for 2013! The following are just a few of many group classes that are a part of the cutting-edge fitness instruction available at The Club. BODYATTACK™ is a high energy, calorie-consuming, athletic workout that will push you past the limit with strong, simple moves and pumping music. It burns up to 750 calories in an hour!

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metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 45

➺sports victories by ROBERT WILSON

RYAN BUCHANAN Leadership and Character on the Gridiron ackson Prep senior quarterback Ryan Buchanan has a 30-minute talk every night.

It’s not with Prep coach Ricky Black. It’s not with coach Hugh Freeze at Ole Miss, where Buchanan had decided to play college football. It’s not with friends or teammates. It’s not even with his parents. The most important 30 minutes of Buchanan’s busy day comes before he goes to sleep when he has a conversation with God. “I started doing that about two years ago when I decided to have a more serious relationship with God,” Buchanan said. “And I’m not going to sleep until I have that long talk. It’s become routine. It is a special time for me where I thank Him for everything He has given me. I’m very blessed where I am today. I never take what I have for granted. Where I am right now in my life is a rare place for a high school student. I’ve been given an opportunity to play college football in the SEC and not many can say that.” Buchanan is definitely in a class by himself. He is the only true quarterback named this summer to the Clarion-Ledger Dandy Dozen, which recognizes the top 12 players in Mississippi each year before the season begins. He decided to verbally commit to Ole Miss after receiving many scholarship offers from around the country. The 6-foot-4, 210-pound Buchanan also led Prep to an undefeated season, and capped it off with a 34-10 victory over MAIS Class AAA, Division I, three-time defending champion Jackson Academy for the championship. “The biggest thing about Ryan is that he is very unselfish,” Black said. “If he was on another team he might have better stats, but that wasn’t his focus. He played within the team concept and his goal was winning a state championship. Ryan is a good leader in every organization he is in. He also displays Christian character all the time.” “Ryan has the perfect demeanor to be a great leader,” Prep athletic director and defensive coordinator Will Crosby said. “What has impressed me the most about him throughout this entire process is his ability to stay humble and grounded. With all the national attention he has been getting, it would very easy for an 18-year-old to get caught up in the hype. But Ryan didn’t do that. He was very focused on the goals he and his teammates wanted to accomplish this year. He has handled this entire recruiting process as well as you could ask anyone to handle it. I think that is a testament to his commitment to his beliefs and having a

46 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

good family around him.” Buchanan, the son of Holly and Brooks Buchanan, is a member of First Baptist Church Jackson. “I grew up in a Christian home and accepted Christ and was baptized when I was eight years old,” Buchanan said. “I made sure that I made a public profession of faith when I was younger, but as I became older I wanted to get more serious about my commitment to Christ. That came for me when I was a junior and I decided to be committed to Christ daily–in everything I do.” Buchanan’s character and leadership qualities have influenced his teammates. “Ryan is a friend that you can always trust and count on when you need him,” Prep senior lineman John Gathings said. “He has the leadership skills that not many people have and that has translated to the field. Both his teammates and friends respect Ryan. He is very humble and that leads to respect. Ryan is always interested in helping others before himself.” “I know it is so important to be a leader when you are a senior for the younger players because I remember when I was a sophomore,” Buchanan said. “I had seniors like William Brant, Luke Love and others who took time to talk to me and be great examples to follow. I wanted to do that with those sophomores now that I’m a senior. I’ve tried to be open, not stay to myself, and share things with these younger guys.” “Ryan is very straightforward,” Prep sophomore wide receiver Parker Caracci said. “If you’re doing something wrong, he will tell you how to fix it and practice it with you until you can’t do it wrong again. Ryan is positive about everything. If something goes wrong, he looks for the positive side of it. Ryan will take time before and after practice to work with you. He always has a good attitude.” Joel Waters, executive director of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Mississippi, has been Buchanan’s big brother while he was in high school and has seen him mature. “Ryan is a special young man,” Waters said. “He has so many great qualities that I admire such as humbleness, leadership, compassion, and willingness to help others. Ryan has had a tremendous influence on me, and also his teammates and classmates at Prep. The future is bright for Ryan and I’m looking forward to seeing what great things God has in store for him.” Y Robert Wilson is Business Developer for BFAC . He is a freelance writer, author, and the publisher of Victories in Metro Jackson magazine. He is a member of Broadmoor Baptist Church. Contact him at Robert@bfac.com.

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money matters by READ MEADOWS

Sound Investment Strategies for 2013 “I really can’t stay—Baby it’s cold outside / I’ve got to go away - Baby it’s cold outside…” – Frank Loesser

rank Loesser’s 1944 Christmas song speaks to many investors’ sentiment of feeling like you’ve been “left out in the cold,” and wanting to “go away” from the stock market by moving your money to cash. This has been a recurring theme with

our clients since the 2008 financial crisis, and I can’t say I completely fault them. Add this to the uncertainties from the recent election and looming fiscal cliff, and “room for concern” is an understatement. As an investment manager I am not tasked with solving these problems (thankfully), but helping our clients navigate the environment they create. Fortunately, it is not all bad news. Here are some insights into what is happening.

Tailwinds for the market Seasonally Strong Returns – According to the Stock Trader’s Almanac, the stock market tends to perform far better in the six month period from November to April versus May to October. Since 1950, $10,000 invested in the Dow Jones Industrial Average during the weak six months would only be worth $8,976. The same money invested in the Dow Jones Industrial Average during the best six months would be worth $674,073! (That was not a typo, but don’t be confused: it does not mean positive returns are impossible in the bad six months and negative returns impossible in the good six months.) This month is no exception says Jeff Saut, Raymond James Chief Investment Strategist, “December has been the best performing month of the year over the past 100 years with positive returns 73% of the time.” Chief Market Technician Art Huprich says that according to the book titled, The Little Book of Stock Market Cycles, (authored by the same gentleman who wrote The Stock Trader’s Almanac,) “December is the number-two month on the Dow Jones Industrials and number one on the S&P 500 since 1950...The Dow and the S&P 500 start the month off slower and do not become undeniably bullish until the third trading day. But, on the fourth trading day becomes more guarded and remains so through the first half of the month as tax-selling wraps up. It is not until the

middle of the week after December ‘TripleWitching Week’ that stocks begin to rise consistently on the majority of days.” Market Backstop – With Obama’s reelection, Ben Bernanke is likely to remain the Fed chairman. This means his policies of exceptionally low interest rates via “Quantitative Easing” or “QE” as you probably have heard it called, will likely continue. Whether the policy’s merit is good, bad, or indifferent the stock market’s trend has an upward bias in the months following more “QE.” (The third round was enacted in September.)

Headwinds for the market The Fiscal Cliff – Lots of ink has been spilled on this subject, so I will only mention the high points. First off, “It’s not really a ‘cliff’—the economy won’t grind to a halt on January 1. Washington has several weeks in 2013 to work out a deal without a major impact on the economy,” says Scott Brown, PhD, Chief Economist for Raymond James. More than likely, a deal will be struck. Politicians can’t help but think about re-election, and they don’t want to be the ones blamed for a recession if the fiscal cliff’s full effects are not curtailed. The question is really when, not if the deal will be hammered out. Sooner would obviously be better because it would reduce “uncertainty,” and remember, the stock market hates uncertainty. When a compromise is reached, look for GDP growth to be around 2% in 2013—mostly in the second half of the year.

Europe – The much maligned debt crises across the EU countries will continue to add uncertainty to the global markets. So as an investor, what do you do from here? Don’t be surprised to see volatility creep up in the coming months. This usually leads to investor’s blood pressure moving up in tandem, but remain calm and use wide price swings to your advantage (buy good stocks cheaply and exit bad stocks on rallies.) Gold has entered a seasonally strong period from the beginning of November to the end of February, just be careful how you own it. Lastly, Raymond James’ Chief Investment Strategist, Jeff Saut, made a statement in a press release prior to the election about the market sectors that tend to perform well under Republican or Democratic White Houses. Since we have the latter, “A

Democratic Presidential win should favor the following: Consumer Discretionary, Infrastructure, Clean Energy, Internet, Communications, and Muni Bonds.” The holidays are in full swing. We are surrounded by the craziness of shopping, cooking, stock market volatility, and scrambling in Washington. Despite all of this, enjoy the time you are able to spend with your family and never forget, “For unto us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:6). Merry Christmas! Y Read Meadows is a Financial Advisor with Raymond James Financial Services located in Jackson. He and his wife Elizabeth live in Madison. To contact him, call 601-321-2090 or email Read.Meadows@RaymondJames.com. Inclusion of these indexes is for illustrative purposes only. The Dow Jones Industrial Average is a price-weighted average of 30 significant stocks traded on the New York Stock Exchange and the Nasdaq. Keep in mind that individuals cannot invest directly in any index, and index performance does not include transaction costs or other fees, which will affect actual investment performance. Individual investor’s results will vary. Past performance does not guarantee future results. The information contained in this report does not purport to be a complete description of the securities, markets, or developments referred to in this material. The information has been obtained from sources considered to be reliable, but we do not guarantee that the foregoing material is accurate or complete. Any information is not a complete summary or statement of all available data necessary for making an investment decision and does not constitute a recommendation. Any opinions are those of Read Meadows and not necessarily those of RJFS or Raymond James. Expressions of opinion are as of this date and are subject to change without notice. Investments mentioned may not be suitable for all investors. Past performance may not be indicative of future results. You should discuss any tax or legal matters with the appropriate professional. Gold is subject to the special risks associated with investing in precious metals, including but not limited to: price may be subject to wide fluctuation; the market is relatively limited; the sources are concentrated in countries that have the potential for instability; and the market is unregulated. Investing in the energy sector involves special risks, including the potential adverse effects of state and federal regulation and may not be suitable for all investors. The companies engaged in the communications and technology industries are subject to fierce competition and their products and services may be subject to rapid obsolescence. Every investor’s situation is unique and you should consider your investment goals, risk tolerance and time horizon before making any investment. Investing involves risk and you may incur a profit or loss regardless of strategy selected. The forgoing is not a recommendation to buy or sell any individual security or any combination of securities. Income from municipal bonds is not subject to federal income taxation; however, it may be subject to state and local taxes and, for certain investors, to the alternative minimum tax. Income from taxable municipal bonds is subject to federal income taxation, and it may be subject to state and local taxes.

metrochristianliving.com ❘ NOVEMBER 2012 49

➺christian commerce by NEAL STEPHENS

The DORE Program Unlocks Learning Potential was one of the first Americans to complete the program back in 2002 as a high school sophomore. As I began the Dore Program, I first noticed changes on the basketball court in my ball control, dribbling, and movement around the court. I noticed changes in my spatial awareness, and my free throw percentage increased significantly. Of course that encouraged me, and as I continued the Dore Program, I retook the ACT—which I had already taken a few times in preparation for college—and my reading score increased enough to greatly impact my composite score! Still today, I notice that I continue to be a quick learner and am able to comprehend what I read so much more easily than I did before Dore. And, like other Dore champions— those who complete the program—the changes that take place are permanent. I now serve as the director of the Dore Program. Having completed the program successfully, I have observed countless individuals around the world who have experienced life-changing results from the program, and I am excited to play a role in bringing the program to those who may benefit. I work with all our Dore team members to make sure that we are best-equipped to serve each and every person, school, and organization we work alongside. We know Dore is a journey, and we want to ensure that each individual is able to reach his or her maximum potential! Every day, my faith is inspired by the lives I see changed because of the program. For me, Dore is a way that I am able to give back to my community and the state of Mississippi. In a way, you could say it has become my mission as God has led me here. I feel that I am able to help families, schools, and students become stronger and more successful each day. I feel so privileged to be able to bring such a lifechanging program to families and, without a doubt, each time I see and hear the remarkable changes in our clients I know that God has brought us together and blessed all of us!

“I

50 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

My sister, Natalie, has been called to serve as a long-term missionary in the Philippines and watching her journey has been inspirational as she serves and loves orphans. For my family, we have always sought to serve God by serving others and, particularly, students. For me, serving my community through the Dore program has been my personal opportunity to do that. Often, I hear that the program sounds too simple or that there must be more to what we are doing. In fact, the program is simple to complete, and the activities last only about 10 minutes, twice per day; however, each program is individually customized to target each person’s specific needs, and the given activities are designed to be challenging. Students still need great teachers and mentors. Adult learners and athletes continue to benefit from additional practice and training. But Dore is the piece that allows individuals to unlock their potential, to enhance skill development, and so the complexity of the program lies in its specificity and the program’s tailored regimen of clientspecific exercises and progression. Dore is an effective resource for students and athletes seven years and older, as well as adults of all ages. In fact, our oldest Dore champion was a young lady in her 80s! Y Editor’s Note: Neal Stephens, President of NewEdge, LLC, is a Harvard graduate and the director of the Dore program. This novel approach helps both children and adults maximize their ability to learn in both the academic and the physical realm. An added benefit is that this is a drug-free approach. As one who personally benefitted from the Dore regimen, he has a passion to help others unlock their highest potential. The Dore offices are located on Lakeland Drive, but its clients have come from as far away as New York, Florida, and Canada for the specialized help that Dore offers. Neal, a leader whose faith shapes his work ethic shares a little about Dore with us this month.

legal advice by WILLIAM B. HOWELL

Unique Opportunities with the Fiscal Cliff and the Close of 2012

here has been much conversation about the “fiscal cliff” that is coming at the end of the year. But relatively little has been said about the opportunities that will no longer be with us after the end of December. For example, during 2012 each of us has the ability to gift to anyone (or any combination of “any ones”) up to $5.12 million dollars tax-free. That means no gift tax to the giver and no income tax to the recipient, and the assets gifted will not be in the estate of the giver at death to be taxed. But on January 1, 2013, the gift tax limit will be back to a $1 million dollar lifetime exemption. That is unless Congress acts in the meantime. Given the track record of recent years, that would truly be a year-end miracle. When the reduction in gift tax exemption amount is coupled with the reduction in the death tax exemption, moving the latter back to $1 million also, this is a time for unmatched planning opportunity. For anyone having a total estate value above $1 million, the next few days and weeks are an ideal time to bring down the size of their estate with some calculated gifting. Not only is the death tax exemption scheduled

to go from $5.12 million back to $1 million, the top death tax rate is set to go up to 55%—so avoiding that outcome with some good planning can be of great benefit. Some people are surprised to learn that their death taxable estate consist of not only their home and other real property, their savings, investments and bank accounts, but also life insurance proceeds if the policy owned by the decedent are included. Retirement funds like IRAs and 401ks are also a part of one’s taxable estate. When all of these are added together, many of us have a potentially taxable estate, even though we do not consider ourselves as being “rich,” whatever that means. Some families have had a father or mother pass away in 2012 or prior, leaving a surviving spouse with all the assets. If the assets total above $1 million dollars, then prior to the end of this year is a very good time to gift away enough to keep the estate of the surviving spouse below the taxable amount. Gifting does not have to be done directly to the child or children, especially if you are concerned about their losing the gifted asset in a divorce, bankruptcy, lawsuit or just to poor judgment.

Instead gifts can be put into a Gifting Trust that provides protection to the assets from those dangers. Also, the Gifting Trust can be structured so that the surviving spouse continues to receive the income produced by the gifted assets. And then there is the issue of your retirement funds. A surviving spouse can inherit an IRA and take only the required minimum distributions. But if the retirement account passes to a child, they generally have to take it all out and pay any income taxes due immediately. On the other hand, a child can be allowed to take small taxable distributions over their lifetime if proper arrangements are made ahead of time (before the IRA owner passes away). This opportunity is not expiring at the end of the year, but planning still needs to be done before something happens—and who knows when that will be? There are opportunities for all of us. Don’t let this unique time pass without at least consulting a knowledgeable estate planning attorney. That will sure help keep down regrets later which could result from not doing anything. Happy New Year! Y

We are all living longer. But we are not all going to be in good health, or aware of our families, or both. Then what happens? Someone has to take over. The question is: Will this be someone you chose? And will it be outside of court or in court? The same with the distribution of your assets after you pass away: In court or out of court? The choice is yours. What about protecting your assets from lawsuits, or a child’s inheritance from a divorce? And will most of your hard-earned savings go to the nursing home? Or have you planned? Here are a few ideas for you to consider: –

. –

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52 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Margaret Campbell travels home to Stirling for Christmas, only to find that nothing has changed. Unable to bear her brother’s bitterness, Meg takes the train back to Glasgow where she lives and works. Unfortunately, the weather refuses to cooperate and when the locomotive stalls in a huge snowdrift, she’s forced back home again. Gordon Shaw has his own reasons to want to leave Stirling for Glasgow, where he works as a newspaperman. He hasn’t returned to Stirling since he left in shame after accidentally crippling a boy. He’s shocked to recognize Meg as the boy’s sister. Yet his faith and his desire to apologize draw him to her when snow stops the train. The two begin with mutual attraction, but the past quickly comes between them. When Margaret’s parents invite Gordon to their home for Christmas without recognizing him, he must walk a fine line between the truth of his past and his remorse in the present. Will forgiveness finally remove the guilt he carries? Best-selling author Liz Curtis Higgs takes readers to Victorian Scotland in her lovely new novella A Wreath of Snow. She incorporates the same depth of character development and setting readers expect into the shorter format. Higgs deftly weaves all strands together with a plot that includes a surprising twist and a message of grace. A Wreath of Snow would make a wonderful Christmas gift for anyone who loves Higgs’ other Scottish novels or provide an introduction to her work for any historical fiction lover. Y Susan E. Richardson is a writer, critique reader, and former Christian retailer with a passion for meeting people’s needs through the written word. You can reach her through her website www.nextlevelcritiques.com.

Crave His Presence Written by Kate Boudreaux of The Collective

Ross Hebert, frontman for up and coming Houma-based worship band Crave, is not only a gifted musician, he also has another unique ability: in his 24 years of life, Ross Hebert has never met a stranger. Ever a free spirit, Hebert’s easygoing smile immediately sets souls at ease, and ten minutes after introductions, even complete strangers will find themselves relaxed and comfortable, feeling as if they have been sitting across from a long-lost friend. The same warmth and authenticity that describe Hebert’s personality also embody the sound and feel of Crave, and the heartbeat of both is “to create music that helps draw people to make better decisions and know that no matter what, God is for them and loves them.” Inspired by Coldplay, Mutemath, and Jason Morant, Crave’s catchy pop/rock sound has developed over time from the eclectic musical backgrounds of its band members. There is nothing pretentious about Hebert, who adds, “We have been a band for 14 years and have no plans of stopping! It all started with a simple jam session, and it ended up sounding so good that we decided to start a band! All those years of traveling, playing, writing and recording new songs are starting to pay off, and we’re wrapping up a deal with Sony.” Three of Crave’s songs will be featured in the upcoming film Ring the Bell, slated for release in January 2013 by Provident Films, a division of Sony Music Entertainment, responsible for faith-based films such as October Baby, Courageous, and Fireproof. Find more information about Crave at www.cravehispresence.com. Y

events calendar December 1 Mustard Seed, a Christian community for mentallychallenged adults, is having their open house from 10:00 a.m. – 3:00 p.m. Enjoy music from the “Bells of Faith” handbell choir, bake sale, and an opportunity to buy Christmas ornaments made by the talented seedsters. For additional information, call 601-992-3556. December 4 The Mississippi Museum of Art in partnership with St. Andrew’s Cathedral will host The Lighting of the Bethlehem Tree beginning at 5:45 p.m. Enjoy music performed by the Parish Choir of St. Andrews. For more information, call 601-960-1515.

carols, a ride on the trackless train, a view of the living nativity, and much more. Admission is $1 per person or $5 max per family. For additional information, visit www.parents-kids.com. December 7-9 First Baptist Church of Jackson will be the site of their annual Carols by Candlelight. This free family event is sure to get you into the Christmas spirit with beautiful music and Biblical truths of the “reason for the season.” For more information, call 601-949-1900. December 10 Looking for a meaningful Christmas present? Just head to Lemuria Bookstore and pick up How Big is Your God? The Spiritual Legacy of Sam Patterson, Evangelist. Meet Rebecca Hobbs, author, from 3:00 p.m. – 6:00 p.m. and get your own personalized signed copy.

December 5-13 The Mississippi Puppetry Guild presents Junie B. in Jingle Bells, Batman Smells at Belhaven’s Center for the Arts located on 836 Riverside Drive. Bring the entire family for this fun and laughter filled event. For ticket information call 601-977-9840.

December 15 Kids of all ages will enjoy a Nature Made Christmas at the Mississippi Museum of Natural Science. From 10:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m. have fun making ornaments using natural objects. Regular admission applies. For more information, call 601-576-6000.

November 30 – December 1 Enjoy a metro Christmas tradition with Belhaven University’s 80th Singing Christmas Tree. The event takes place in the University Bowl on the Belhaven campus at 7:30 p.m. This family-friendly event is free to the public, and attendees are encouraged to dress in warm clothes, and bring blankets or chairs to sit on. Call 601-974-6494 for more information.

DECEMBER 2012

JACKSON

November 30 – December 2 The Chimneyville Crafts Festival, featuring the works and wares of some 150 members of the Mississippi Craftsmen’s Guild, is also a tradition that will never disappoint. One-of-akind gifts that are true works of art—at the Mississippi Trade Mart on the fairgrounds property off High Street. See www.mscrafts-org for details.

December 8 and 9 The Nutcracker will be performed by the Mississippi Metropolitan Ballet at Jackson Academy Performing Arts Center. Matinee and evening performances. See www.msmetroballet.com for tickets and information. Y

Now through January 6 December 6-8 Parents & Kids Magazine’s Christmas Fest, a gift from Patty Peck Honda, will be held at the Mississippi Museum of Natural Sciences with festivities sure to please the entire family. Enjoy local choirs performing Christmas

Ice skating at Christmas on Ice! Located at Baptist Drive in Madison, right off Highland Colony Parkway and Hwy 463, the rink and ice slide are open Sunday – Thursday, noon – 9 p.m.; and Friday and Saturday, 10 a.m. – 11 p.m. $15 per person.

WHAT’S GOING ON Looking for a meaningful Christmas present? You can t do better than a copy of How Big is Your God? The Spiritual Legacy of Sam Patterson, Evangelist. Meet the author, Rebecca Hobbs, and get a signed copy at Lemuria Bookstore in Jackson on December 10, from 3-6 p.m. Incredibly well-researched and written, the volume traces the life of a beloved Christian who dedicated his adult life to serving Christ by reclaiming souls for Christ. Not only does the book explore the vast influence of a compelling educator, pastor, and evangelist, it also details for the first time the founding of Reformed Theological Seminary, the primary catalyst in the formation of the Presbyterian Church in

America. Patterson s 17 years at French Camp Academy detail the strong influence he had on young children with problems not of their own making. The chapter on evangelism shows vividly how God used “Mr. Pat” so effectively in leading large numbers of men, women, and children into eternal life with Him. Enjoy voluminous bits of history and countless moving vignettes told in a warm, sincere, and often humorous way. Much more than a “one-time read,” the book contains chapters with a wealth of material from “Mr. Pat s” sermons—especially on prayer and evangelism—that are suitable for Bible classes, family devotions, or personal study for all ages. Y

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metrochristianliving.com ❘ DECEMBER 2012 53

➺quips & quotes {

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“Who can add to Christmas? The perfect motive is that God so loved the world. The perfect gift is that He gave His only Son. The only requirement is to believe in Him. The reward of faith is that you shall have everlasting life.” – Corrie ten Boom

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end.” – Isaiah 9:6

“There has been only one Christmas—the rest are anniversaries.” – W. J. Cameron

“We consider Christmas as the encounter, the great encounter, the historical encounter, the decisive encounter, between God and mankind. He who has faith knows this truly; let him rejoice” – Pope Paul VI

“This is Christmas: not the tinsel, not the giving and receiving, not even the carols. But the humble heart that receives anew the wondrous gift—the Christ.” - Frank McKibben

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54 DECEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

PAGE

Apple Annie’s .................................................................22 BankPlus..........................................................................17 Baptist Medical Center....................................................7 Baptist Medical Clinic, Clinton......................................17 Beautiful Image of Jackson ...........................................27 Belhaven University..........................................................3 Blue Cross Blue Shield of MS........................................18 Bravo/Broad Street/Sal & Mookie’s..............................27 Callaway’s Yard & Garden .............................................14 C Spire...............................................................................5 Chandelier Luxury Linens ..............................................39 Christ Covenant School.................................................33 City of Clinton ................................................................14 Covenant Caregivers .....................................................20 DORE Program ..............................................................50 Edible Arrangements.....................................................33 Energy Insulation, Inc.....................................................35 EyeCare Professionals....................................................22 First Presbyterian Day School .......................................39 Gameroom Gallery ........................................................52 Gentiva Hospice.............................................................31 Grantham Poole Certified Public Accountants............45 Highland Village .............................................................27 Home Instead Senior Care............................................22 Jackson Academy ............................................................2 Jackson Heart.................................................................27 Jackson Orthopaedic Clinic, P.A...................................48 Jackson Preparatory School..........................................47 Joel Clarke & Sons Jewelry...........................................19 Kids Kloset/The Kloset...................................................31 King’s Daughters Hospital.............................................35 L. D. O’Mire Financial Services .....................................53 Lake Forest Ranch..........................................................45 Law Firm of William B. Howell, Ltd. .............................51 Methodist Rehabilitation Center ..................................23 Metro Christian Leaders of the Future ...........................6 Mississippi Breast Center/Phillip B. Ley, MD, FACS....18 Mississippi College.........................................................30 Novella ...........................................................................22 N. State Animal Hospital...............................................54 O! How Cute ..................................................................15 Palmer Home for Children ............................................17 Parents & Kids Magazine ..............................................47 Persnickety......................................................................13 Pennington & Trim Alarm Services, Inc........................21 Pilates V Studio ..............................................................25 Raymond James.............................................................49 RTS Book Signing...........................................................39 Rugged Bliss...................................................................33 Sew Smocking Cute.......................................................44 Sitters, Inc. ......................................................................47 Smiles by Design............................................................16 Southern Accents, A Gift Boutique..............................34 Southern Farm Life Insurance Co. ................................33 St. Catherine’s Village ......................................................9 Star 93.5 FM...................................................................55 Stegall Photography ......................................................55 Summit Counseling........................................................21 Sunnybrook Estates .......................................................52 Tears for Water (Outreach for World Hope) ..................4 The Waterford ................................................................17 The Club at the Township .............................................56 The Eye Group of Mississippi........................................24 The Orchard ...................................................................48 The Veritas School..........................................................35 ThinkWEBSTORE.com...................................................39 Tinnin Imports.................................................................11 Transformations River Oaks...........................................12 Trustmark ........................................................................35 Venable Glass Services ..................................................21 Woodridge Capital Portfolio Management.................31 Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home ...............................48 Written in Stone.............................................................21

metrochristianliving.com â?&#x2DC; DECEMBER 2012 55