January 2013 Metro Christian Living

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JANUARY 2013

January Soup Medley Thrifty Living in Tough Times

COURAGE TO SPEAK

5 Transformational Habits

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contents JANUARY 2013 columns 13 All in the Family

Editor: Marilyn Tinnin marilyn@metrochristianliving.com

14 Education Connection Resolving to Raise Children Who Love to Read

15 HomeWorks

Transformational Habits

16 This Is My Story

Compassion International Offers Hope and a Future

20 Living My Call Real Girl Magazine for Real Girls

22 Chewed Petunias Courage to Speak

26 Pastor’s Perspective

19

The Unified LIfe

33 Modern Motherhood

Resolutions From a Rule Breaker

Drake Bassett Driven by Love

36 Single Still, Single Again

Special Feature

37 Outside In

Thrifty Living in Tough Times

38 Let’s Talk It Over

Happily Ever After in the Meantime The Kingdom of Me Relationships Are a Risky Business

41 Lagniappe

16

Women and Children Are at the Mercy of the Court

46 Salt & Light The Child Evangelism Fellowship

50 Think Tank

Reaching Your Full Potential

42 Legal Advice 10 Good Reasons to Plan Your Estate

14

departments 24 Healthy Living

34

Vivian Taylor, Pilates by V

32 Food For Thought January Soup Medley

34 Money Matters

Things to Consider in 2013

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40 Fresh Finds 44 Welcome Home 5 Keys to Declutter and Make Room for God

48 Sports Victories Keith Williams – Madison Central’s Own Michael Oher Story

51 What’s Going On Bible Study

What’s Coming Next Month?

Larry Grantham

52 Rave Reviews

Mississippi Sports Hall of Famer Shares His Faith Story

in every issue

Books, Movies, and Music

➺

8 53 54 54 6 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Volume 7, Number 7 Publisher: MHS Publications, Inc., Member, M.I.P.A.

Anything Worth Doing Is Worth Doing Poorly

28

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10 The Way I See It

Your God Is Too Small

features

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Editor’s Letter Event Calendar Quips & Quotes Ad Directory

Administrative Assistant: Carol Rodgers carol@metrochristianliving.com Associate Editor: Suzanne Tanner Art Direction/Graphic Design Sandra K. Goff Sales Marilyn Tinnin, Kimberly Stephens, Suzanne Tanner Contributing Writers Glen Allison, Elizabeth Bennett, Lydia Bolen, Kimberly Grace Bowman, Dr. John L. Cox, Shawn Dean, Cathy Haynie, Terri Herring, William B. Howell, Amy Ingram, John C. Kwasney, Susan Marquez, Gary Maze, Robin O’Bryant, Susan E. Richardson, Mike Traylor, Danny Williams, Martin E. Willoughby, Jr., Robert Wilson, Andy Wimberly, Kim Wolinski, Beverly Yearwood Cover Photography Palmer Home Distribution Assistants Laura Kidder, Randy Fortenberry, Carol Rodgers, Andrea Sabillion, Rachel Schulte, Jerri Strickland, Priscilla Sullivan, Tim Waldon, Bob Whatley

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Copyright 2012 by Metro Christian Living, Inc. Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of International Bible Society.

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➺editor’s letter Best Advice for the New Year: Encourage Yourself in the Lord Our God! “…But David encouraged himself in the Lord his God” (1 Samuel 30:6). recently finished a 12-week study on the life of David. He is always identified as “a man after God’s own heart,” and if you have never studied him, that title might conjure up images of a near perfect man who rarely strayed from the straight and narrow. Actually, the opposite is true. If ever there were a

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O God, our help in ❝ ages past, Our hope for years to come, Our shelter from the stormy blast, And our eternal home.

❞

– Isaac Watts

8 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

saga of the good, the bad, and the ugly laid bare before the eyes of the world, it would be David’s life story. His humanity bleeds through the intriguing tale of heroic moments as well as disappointing failures. It is always encouraging to me that God did not gloss over or omit the times David’s willful disobedience or lack of faith resulted in heartache. David’s life experience may have been set against the backdrop of ancient times, but his human nature was an awful lot like ours.

And oh, how evident and beautiful is God’s powerful grace and redemption again and again as the story unfolds.

Here, on the brink of a new year, as we are inundated with painful news on every front, the verse from 1 Samuel 30:6 bounces around my brain constantly. David and his army had been away, and when they returned to their village, they discovered the Amalekites had swept through, burned everything, and taken all the wives and children captive. Circumstances seemed to go from bad to worse as the angry and grieving men began to talk of stoning David. Scripture says, “They wept until they had no more strength to weep.” And when the tears finally stopped and the dust settled, the grief was still fresh when David “encouraged himself in the Lord.” I would think he retrieved a sense of hope and comfort by intentionally remembering God’s faithfulness, God’s nature, God’s promises, God’s providence, and the fact that God was still God. And so, for us today, God is our refuge and our fortress every bit as much as He was David’s 3000 years ago.

Sometimes, in the middle of breaking news, it is good to remember that, and to encourage yourself in the Lord!

As we roll out this first issue of the New Year, we hope you find much to encourage and inspire.

Drake Bassett, President of Palmer Home, left a very successful career at the top of the corporate ladder, to take the reins of a relatively small ministry in Columbus, Mississippi. His story, and indeed, the Palmer Home story, will definitely encourage in the Lord because it is a true picture of what can be accomplished when God takes complete hold of a Believer’s heart.

One of my favorite new columns comes from our familiar guru of books, Susan E. Richardson.

“Chewed Petunias” will speak to any discouraged hearts that feel that life has literally chewed them up and spit them out. You will love Susan’s insight and appreciate her transparency.

Even those of us who don’t make resolutions anymore still have good intentions of reforming a bad habit or creating a good new one. While we adopt a million self-improvement strategies for everything from diet and exercise to organizing closets to nurturing our spiritual lives, we cling to optimism that this year we will succeed where in the past we failed. You will find plenty of ideas and lots of tips, but just for good measure, read Dr. Cox’s consoling column, “All in the Family.” He will help you toss your guilt in case you don’t achieve total success with all of those good intentions.

Broadmoor’s Gary Maze wrote our “Pastor’s Perspective” this month, and I love his thoughts on the pitfalls of compartmentalizing our lives. Imagine the ripple effect in the world around us if we, as Believers, considered every experience of our lives in the context of our life in Christ.

There is so much more here—I’m anxious for you to meet the array of amazing people featured this month. You cannot read very far without being energized and—yes—encouraged in the Lord because He is very much alive and at work no matter what the “breaking news” broadcasts!

Happy New Year, and, by all means—encourage yourself every new day in our magnificent and glorious Lord. Y

Marilyn H. Tinnin, Publisher and Editor marilyn@metrochristianliving.com

➺the way i see it

by MARTIN E. WILLOUGHBY, JR.

Your God Is Too Small ometimes I find myself drifting into a view of God that is just too small. J.B. Phillips in his short but impactful book, Your God is Too Small, does a great job of unpacking this issue. Phillips notes that

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God is moving all around us in mighty and powerful ways.

The question is whether we have our eyes open.

there are many reasons for this challenge including the fact that many people believe, “Christ and the Christian religion is a soft and sentimental thing which has nothing to do with the work day world.” He points out that Christianity is not just a religion.

Instead, it is a “revelation of the true way of living, the way to know God, the way to live life of eternal quality.” As I have been re-studying Henry Blackaby’s Experiencing God, I am challenged to refocus on my love relationship with God and to reflect on how truly big God really is.

I read in Scripture of people who encountered the bigness of God and how it changed their lives. For example, Moses worked through his fear to lead the Israelites out of captivity. Peter and John were regular people but became men of boldness and courage that healed in the name of Christ (Acts 3:6). I am encouraged that this type of life change is not just in the Bible. I have met countless people who have shared with me their story and report of God’s grace and transformative impact on their lives. While some Christians may disagree, I have seen and heard reports of too many ways in which God’s supernatural powers still exist to believe that God does not still work in mighty ways.

God is moving all around us in mighty and powerful ways. The question is whether we have our eyes open. I had the opportunity recently to visit with Tammy Brun, member of Rehobeth Baptist Church in Pelahatchie, to learn about some of the miraculous ways God is at work. She and now many others have become involved in a ministry called Ever Reaching Community Outreach (ERCO) that is serving the needs of the poor in our community. They are not following a grand plan or fancy methodology. Instead, they lean into God. As Brun shared, “When we hear of a need in our community, the group comes together, pools our ideas, resources, and funds, and then we hit the ground running.” The amazing way in which ERCO has grown and helped so many in need is simply a work of God. We need more of this in our society.

As Blackaby notes, “Our world is not seeing God because we are not attempting anything that only God can do.”

One day (hopefully some years from now), I will lie on my deathbed. As my life on this earth drifts away, I will cling to the eternal hope and assurance I have in my faith in Christ. The reality is that we all cross the final valley alone. As I have spent time with people in their final months and days, I see the intensity of the hope in the bigness of God to help them with that final challenge. Unfortunately, we have a hard time having that level of clarity about our daily lives and God’s bigness. Surely, the Creator of the universe who raised Christ from the dead is worthy of my worship, love and surrender.

The sin of pride can creep in and delude me to think that I have it all under control.

The reality is that we miss God’s real plan for our lives and the peace and comfort in knowing who we are and what our ultimate destination is if we make our God too small.

As we enter the New Year, perhaps now is the time to reflect on the bigness of God, and what God-sized plans He has for our lives. Y

Martin E. Willoughby, Jr,. is Chief Operating Officer of Butler Snow Advisory Services, LLC located in Ridgeland. He and his wife, Nicki, have two children, Ally and Trey, and live in Madison.

10 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

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all in the family

by DR. JOHN L. COX

Anything Worth Doing Is Worth Doing Poorly t’s January, which means it’s time for you to reevaluate your life and begin swearing to change all those bad habits that you’ve been meaning to rid yourself of. Only, if you’re like me, you’ve

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probably had this conversation with yourself before on other Januarys— unsuccessfully. But by golly, you’re going to succeed this time. No more wasting time online, more regular workouts, consistent Bible reading.

“Lucky 2013” will be the magic year! Or maybe not.

Don’t you hate failing? Don’t you wish you could just flip a switch and be different? But we can’t. We still drop the ball-—and we all HATE that! We are 21st Century Americans, who, as General Patton said, “... love a Winner!” We are trained to win. We are dressed for success. We are 10 feet tall, good-lookin’, and bullet proof! And if we fail, Monday Night Football has even given us a new Americanism to issue our complaint: “COME ON MAAAAN!” But the problem is still this: You are going to fail sometimes. Let me say it again: You are going to fail sometimes! Everyone has some area in their lives in which they struggle and are unable to “succeed.” Even though many of us devote our lives to never letting others down or never messing up, failing is an inevitable part of life, just like growing old and paying (more) taxes. So our options are to fight it forever, or to learn how to “fail well.”

So why is it that so much of our lives are governed by our fear of this unavoidable thing we call failure? We obsess, we spend hours in front of the mirror, and we blame others—all so we don’t have to face the fact that we sometimes fail. Well, the culprit is that most of us live our lives being plagued by a constant unspoken question: Is it OK to be me? And because of that nagging question, everything that we do—every success or failure—gets presented to “the court” as evidence either for us or against us. Today’s failure becomes “Exhibit A” for the prosecution to further their case that we are guilty. “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I submit that Dr. Cox is a complete “nogoodnik” because he tried to write a good article for Metro Christian Living and FAAAAAILED!” Now at that point, Dr. Cox can feel awful about himself because he got an awful answer to his core question: It’s not OK to be him! No wonder we all fear failure! We goof up and then “throw the book at ourselves!” By the way, emotionally speaking, this feeling is called shame, and it governs our lives—constantly.

When Adam and Eve ate of the tree that was called “The Knowledge of Good and Evil” they gained an ability that God never wanted us to

have: the ability to know Good and Evil. (Am I going too fast for anyone?) In other words, they developed the ability to judge and to feel judged. Ever since then, we have been scared to fail. As Paul says, we live “under the Law.” You can see this in Adam’s first act after sinning. God asks, “How did you know you were naked?” and Adam says, “The woman, who you gave to me, gave me the fruit and I did eat.” Adam blames God AND Eve in one sentence! (Pretty good for your first day as a sinner, I think. Like making a double play in your first game as a rookie!

Impressive!) But this is why we fear failing. We think that we will not be loved if we are bad.

So the options are obvious. We either need to not be bad (which is the solution we all try), or we need to get loved. Which one do you think is more possible? The truth is that, if you look at your life, there will always be areas where you are ABLE, and areas where you are UNABLE. Both exist. Both are unavoidable. And unless you can single-handedly overcome the Fall of Man, and become successful at everything, you will need safety, forgiveness, and love, to survive the disappointment and shame in the areas in which you are UNABLE. Fortunately, God has a different approach to our New Year’s Resolutions than we do. His approach is to say to his people, “I know that you will grit your teeth and try harder—and you want to know what else—I know that you will fail at many of those things. But I’m the judge in that courtroom in which you are being tried.

And because of the blood of My Son, I have made it safe for you to fail.

The punishment has already been paid. Case dismissed. You are a failure—and I love you.”

To the degree that we can realize that our core question (Is it OK to be me?) has been answered already, we can stop living under the pressure to succeed at everything. To the degree that we humbly confess our failures to God and to each other, we can finally learn what it means that “His strength is made perfect in our weakness,” and then it really CAN be OK to be me. Warts and all!! Y

鵻鵼

The truth is that, if you look at your life, there will always be areas where you are ABLE, and areas where you are UNABLE.

鵻鵼

Dr John L. Cox is a clinical psychologist in practice here in Jackson. He works with adults, marriages and children. You can contact him at 601-352-7398. metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 13

➺education connection

by JOHN C. KWASNEY

Resolving to Raise Children Who Love to Read ecently, a Facebook friend with a two-year-old daughter posed the following question:“Moms or dads—InnoPad or LeapPad?” Now I

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typically don’t respond to questions in my social media newsfeed not specifically directed to me, but I couldn’t resist this time. I tapped out on my iPhone, “Books. Lots of books.” Yes, I know, my Luddite response could be construed as a lessthan-subtle slap on my friend’s wrist. But thankfully, she took it in stride and retorted, “Got it, John. But she isn’t into books as much as I would like her to be…she will sit longer with stuff moving than a book.” Which sums up a very modern dilemma—how do we raise children who love to read in this age of excessive entertainment media?

Now don’t get me wrong; I absolutely love technology. From my very first Atari (yes, I’m dating myself) to my iPad, I have been and still am quite the techno-geek. In my home, you would find more than one family’s fair share of media devices. Even my two-year-old son is remarkably talented with a touchscreen. Yet I have also always been a voracious reader, and thankfully so are my children. So I understand the struggle to train children to love reading books in an age that has too much “stuff moving.”

My guess is that most parents want their children to read well and even to love reading. If that describes you, why not make a resolution towards that end this year? Better yet, let me suggest a complex of resolutions that will help your family move towards the high goal of literate, book-loving children.

Resolution 1 EXAMPLE As with much of our parenting, resolving to raise children with a love for reading begins by example. Do they see you reading? Are you reading to them? Do you read books as a family?

Your affections will often be embraced by your children. A love for reading—whether for stories or study—must be put on display by parents.

Resolution 2 INTERACTION Both the research and common sense is clear: Reading to children increases the real possibility of a lifelong love for reading. It’s essential to start young, when children want to read the same book hundreds of times. Do it, even if you have to employ the time-tested trick of turning two pages at a time! Handing them a tablet that 14 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

reads to them is not the same. They need your voice, your laughter, your questions, and maybe even your tears. Resolve to interact with your children about what they learned from the story and/or a study book.

Resolution 3 TIME Stepping up your resolve a notch requires making time available for your children to read. Many families have chosen much too busy lives, often from fears of their children either being bored or left out. Reading takes time. You may have to make that time for your child. It certainly is easier when they’re young, but make sure to persist through the elementary and teen years too. Hopefully, the love of reading will compel your children to make the time for their self!

Resolution 4 SPACE Modern homes tend to design spaces for everything except reading. We have huge kitchens and bathrooms. Entertainment and recreation rooms dominate most floor plans.

The living room has the flat screen television as its focal point. It may sound radical, but readers need quiet spaces to read. With our family of ten, my wife has taken great pains to develop as many reading nooks as possible. If you want children to enjoy reading, they could use places that are pleasant and quiet, so they can focus.

Resolution 5 – Books Yes, you actually must have books on hand to develop children who love to read. Even ebooks are acceptable, as long as you follow all the rest of the above resolutions! Book lovers require a large quantity of tomes, as well as good, quality material. And, our children should be exposed to a wide range of literary genres, even if they later settle into just a few.

In days past, only the wealthy with abundant luxury time read books. The poor were too busy trying to survive to even learn to read. So what does it say about a society that doesn’t read primarily because there is too much useless and trivial “stuff moving” around us? And, most important of all, how do we expect our children to have a love for the greatest BOOK of all if they don’t have a general love for reading? If you think about it, that’s really the best motivation to resolve to develop children who love to read. Loving books should lead our children to love the knowledge, the wisdom, and the stories of Scripture! Y John C. Kwasny, Ph.D. is a Biblical Counselor, Director of Christian Education and Children’s Ministries at Pear Orchard Presbyterian Church, and the Director of One Story Ministries (www.onestoryministries.org). He and his wife, Martie, have eight children.

➺

homeworks

by CATHY HAYNIE

Transformational Habits A new year, a new you? Everywhere you look you will find opportunities to improve your life, and finding such advice in overload may keep you set in your ways. Before you dismiss the idea or the opportunity, take a step back.

Haggai 1:5 says, “Give careful thought to your ways.” God’s Word is full of opportunity regarding renewal, transformation, and a changed heart through Jesus Christ. Where in your life would God call you to change or to renew?

In 2013, we will begin a series on Transformational Habits. Taking a look at everyday things, from your pantry to your quiet time, there are a few habits that can change the way you approach something even as insignificant as a stocked pantry. I hope you will join us as we consider what those habits might be. We will look at a list of at least five habits for each topic, so that you can pick out one or two difference-makers to try in your own life. To get us started, consider what is required of you to change.

5 1.

Transformational Habits on the Art of Change Recognize the need. I

have found that when I live a more orderly life, I am freed up for other things. For example, if you know what your family is having for dinner tonight, it is easier to have someone join you at the last minute or take something to one who will be blessed by it. I need to stay on top of meal management in order to practice hospitality. With each of our transformational habit topics, consider your own needs and how change will be of great benefit.

Consider your options. I’ve said it often: the best way to get a good idea is to get a lot of ideas. You don’t have to do everything an article suggests to eat healthier, for example, but one or two new habits can truly be life changing. Find as many options as you can in order to find something that will work for you.

2.

Stick it out. If you find yourself particularly habit-resistant, quit thinking it is a fast fix. Oliver Burkeman’s

3.

article in Psychology Today—“How Long Does It Really Take to Change a Habit?”—resists the 21-day notion and says that difficult habits really are hard to die. He encourages you to give yourself more like 60 days before you call it quits.

If at first you don’t succeed— try something else. I have found

4.

over the years that it really did only take one or two new habits to change an area of frustration, or a target area, as I like to call it. But finding that key habit or two can be the challenge. If something isn’t working, try something else, but don’t give up altogether.

Make it a matter of the heart.

5.

Without over-spiritualizing something like a stocked pantry, most of our bad habits do come down to heart issues.

Whether we are over-spending, overeating, or cramming way too much stuff in our closets, we can usually find where our heart has gone astray. Get to know yourself and your sin better and discover how this new habit will bring honor to the Lord and grow you in Christlikeness.

I hope you will join us in 2013 as we look at Transformational Habits. Maybe there is something to the “new year, new you” after all. Y

Cathy Haynie and her husband Jack have three teenagers and make their home in Madison. Cathy is the Headmaster of Christ Covenant School and occasionally speaks to groups on Honoring God in the Home and Balancing Work and Home.

Contact her at chaynie@ccs.ms

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➺this is my story

by BEVERLY YEARWOOD

Compassion International Offers Hope and a Future caption for photo

became a born again Christian in 1978 during a devastating African Famine.

The images on the television of sick, crying, starving, fly-infested children were forever branded into my heart. I remember as if it was yesterday throwing my tear-covered face down into our shag carpet and begging God to take their suffering away. That day I made a vow to God that one day I would make a difference for children suffering because of extreme poverty.

In 2011, I sponsored Daniel from Uganda through Compassion International. I learned a lot about being a good sponsor through Compassion’s online community (ourcompassion.org). I fell in love with this ministry during my training to become a volunteer child advocate. It amazed me how Jesus is the focus of every aspect in this

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16 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

ministry. Compassion International exists to glorify God. They are giving the eternal hope of Jesus to these children. There is no greater tool for releasing a child from poverty than having child-like faith in Jesus.

As a blogger for Compassion, I decided to interview formerly sponsored child Laurent Hategekimana. This interview became the beginning of a partnership in which God would perform countless miracles in just a few short weeks.

Laurent proudly told me how God provided for him through Compassion’s ministry, through an encouraging sponsor, and by helping him to achieve a full academic scholarship to Kigali Health Institute where he graduated with Honors receiving his Bachelor of Dental Therapy Degree. He told me of his struggles to find employment in his third world community.

Instead of becoming discouraged, he refuses to sit at home with knowledge and skills, so he volunteers his services to the people in his community where the average wage is $15 USD per month. He enjoys giving back to his community and chose this field of study due to being treated and healed from oral disease while enrolled in the Compassion program.

Laurent is now assisting me with my advocacy ministry. I find sponsors for the children at this center, and Laurent spends his Saturdays at the center telling the children about their new sponsors, taking pictures, and being a mentor.

Laurent’s grandmother is paralyzed, forcing her to spend her entire life in bed. Laurent often carries her outside to enjoy the sunshine, but she is unable to go to church because she lacks a wheelchair. Finding out that there were others like her in the community, Laurent and I have developed an outreach ministry in his Compassion-assisted church to provide wheelchairs so that the church can go into the community and bring these immobile citizens to church. This will allow the church to meet the needs in the community and spread the gospel to un-churched people. This ministry not only makes life better here on earth, it gives them a chance at having an eternal life.

He told me that he hopes to be an encouragement to young people to show them that your circumstances don’t dictate your future. He wants others to hear his story so that they will put their faith in God. The Rwandan genocide did catastrophic damage to the country’s infrastructure, but Laurent believes that through hard work and faith in God it can be restored. Laurent wishes to pursue his education in the USA since there is no opportunity for higher learning in his field in Rwanda.

I knew that God wanted me to be an advocate for this young man’s education. I knew this burden I felt for Laurent was placed upon me for God’s purpose to be fulfilled. I am completely inadequate for this difficult challenge, but I know that God is working through my weaknesses for his power to be revealed.

I committed to help Laurent figure out a way to study in America. After researching his options, I told him that it would be impossible.

He reminded me that with God all things are possible. I thought that he was being unrealistic in trying to achieve such an impossible dream.

He reminded me of how unrealistic Noah, David, and Moses were in everyone else’s eyes; but faith brought them victory. He honestly feels that becoming a surgeon is God’s will and that it will be done, so giving up is not an option. This will not be easily accomplished, but Laurent has never had it easy, so adversity simply motivates him.

We have been busy preparing documents, submitting applications, making phone calls,

sending emails, setting up appointments, and telling his story to all who will listen. Some say we are wasting our time, but we are doing all that we can so that we will be ready when God does what we can’t! We believe that God is already preparing the hearts of others to provide him with a way to finish his education.

It amazes me how God has brought a network of people around the world together all because of God’s love for one young man in Africa. God provides through the hearts of others.

Laurent needed support; God sent Compassion. Laurent needed encouragement; God sent a sponsor. Losing his father at two, Laurent needed a father figure, and God sent Bob Becker, who Laurent proudly refers to as “Dad”. Laurent needed a voice so that his story could be heard, so he sent me. God did not need me to complete this mission, but I am so thankful that he allowed me to be part of it.

Although Laurent lives in extreme poverty with no running water, no electricity, and no income, he is rich in faith. As for his education, where there is a will there’s a way and where there is God’s will, Jesus will make a way.

I am so thankful that God put Laurent in my life to teach me to never put a limit on what God can do. Y Beverly Yearwood is a Vicksburg resident and a member of Bowmar Baptist Church. Learn more about Compassion International through www.ourcompassion.org. metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 17

Valentine’s Weekend Couples Retreat FEBRUARY 15-16, 2013

EVERYONE NEEDS A HELPING HAND SOMETIMES

LOCATION: Lake Forest Ranch Christian Camp and Retreat Center, 2 hours from Jackson (near Louisville MS)

COST: $150 per couple, includes private room/bath plus 4 meals.

GUEST SPEAKERS: Ron and Kathy Mumbower Ron serves as Counseling and Congregational Care Pastor at First Baptist Church in Jackson, Mississippi

MAXIMUM OF 35 COUPLES, RESERVE YOUR SPOT EARLY!

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special feature

by SUSAN MARQUEZ

Thrifty Living in Tough Times he extravagance and excess of the holidays is over and many are making resolutions to slim down— both their bodies and their budgets. But that doesn’t have to mean giving up the things you love. It’s time to get creative and look for thrifty alternatives that will add up to some extra jingle in your bank account. There are myriad ways to save money in all aspects of your life that can actually make stretching a dollar a fun and rewarding challenge.

After food and shelter, clothing is often the largest budget item for most people. What’s a fashion maven to do if trying to look, well, fashionable while saving money? Jacqui Katool of Madison regularly shops area consignment stores and has found some great finds over the years.

The stores she shops are spacious and clean, and the clothes are carefully chosen for quality and current style. “I’ve found some incredible deals on name-brand apparel. Often, someone purchases an item and they get it home and it doesn’t fit right or they decide it’s not right for them. They may have good intentions of returning the item, but for whatever reason, they never do and it eventually ends up at a consignment store. Much of what I’ve purchased still has the original tags on it.”

One of the consignment stores Katool frequents is Repeat Street in Ridgeland.

Michelle Austin started the store in a small space on Highway 51 several years ago, then moved it to Ridgewood Road Extension as it grew. Today the sprawling store is located in a former outdoors store on Highway 51 in Ridgeland. In addition to clothing and accessories for both men and women, the store carries furniture and home decor.

Katool once bought four skirts and two pair of slacks for $32. “The skirts were from premium stores like Harold’s, Banana Republic, and Chico’s, and the pants were Izod—and most were brand new!” None of the clothes had to be altered, but Katool said that if something doesn’t fit just right, it’s worth the effort to take it to a good alterations person.

“You still come out ahead.”

The items in the consignment stores come primarily from local residents who clean out closets, drawers, and rooms in their homes. They can clear the clutter and make a few bucks at the same time. In most cases, if an item hasn’t sold within a specific period of time, the owner can

T

Do-It-Yourself Laundry Detergent Cleans 576 loads of laundry for $6 Equipment needed • large pot • cheese grater • funnel • long spoon • 2 plastic jugs (1-gallon each) Ingredients • 1 bar of soap (any kind) • 1 cup Borax • 1 cup washing soda • 2 gallons of water Grate the entire bar of soap and put into the pot. Add 1 gallon of water and cook over medium heat until the soap dissolves. Add the Borax and washing soda and mix well.

Bring to a boil. Mixture will coagulate somewhat. Turn off the heat and add the second gallon of water. Mix well. Then, using the funnel, divide the mixture between the two separate gallon jugs.

Use 1-2 tablespoons for each load of laundry. The detergent will not make suds like commercial detergent, but there will also be less soap residue on clothing after washing. This mixture works equally well in hot, warm, and cold water. come back and reclaim it. They can also choose to allow the consignment stores to donate the unsold items to charity. It’s best to call ahead to find out what days/hours the stores accept merchandise, the type of merchandise they will take (most won’t take clothes out of season), and what their payment policy is.

Nicole Davis’ Private Collection opened in 1990. Women’s clothing, including shoes, purses, jewelry, and other accessories are never more than two years old, and her policy of keeping items for no more than 60 days means the inventory is constantly fresh. The customer gets a substantial discount, and the original owner pockets 40% of the selling price. Located in Madison on Highway 51, Private Collection definitely offers upscale quality at a great value.

There’s a new breed of housewives who are not only very Internet savvy, but thrifty as well.

They share their ideas for homemade items such as laundry detergent and repurposing items on sites and blogs like pinterest.com, thriftyfun.com, and ourthriftyideas.com.

Thethriftycouple.com features the parents of five children who found themselves with over $100 thousand in consumer debt, not counting their house. Together, they tackled the debt, paid it off, and now share their ideas for thrifty living on their website.

Being thrifty can extend into all areas of your life. Such simple things like using leftover pasta water for houseplants and turning off the water when brushing your teeth can add up to savings on your water bill. Filling 2-liter bottles with water and putting them into the freezer helps the freezer to work more efficiently. The frozen water bottles can then be used to keep items in an ice chest cool.

Entergy has a “Save Money on Your Bill” tab on their website (www.entergy-mississippi.com) that allows customers to tour a virtual house to save money. The first of three no-cost ways to save money on your power bill, according to the Entergy site, are to set your thermostat to recommended winter and summer settings (68 degrees in the winter, 78 degrees in the summer). This simple solution can save you up to 15% on your monthly energy bill. Next is to adjust the water heater thermostat to produce as much as a 10% savings on your bill each month.

And managing window shades and drapes makes a big difference. Just the simple act of closing shades or drapes on a window in direct sunlight in the summer will reduce radiant heating of your home by as much as 45%. In the winter, opening window shades or drapes will help heat a room. There are plenty of other money-saving ideas on the site on topics such as lighting, appliances, electronics, and home maintenance.

One of the easiest ways to save money is by using coupons. With television shows such as Extreme Couponing, the awareness of how much money can be saved has grown. There are websites dedicated to couponing, but before getting started, it’s best to read the “Coupon Etiquette” article on the couponing.com site.

Locally, Hope Staples teaches a “Couponing 101” class. Staples, a Madison resident, now gets many of the things she and her family needs for free or at drastically reduced prices. “I had certain things I bought each month, such as laundry detergent and shampoo. I figured it was about $60 each month, and now I get those same items for about $7. That’s not generic, either—all the items I buy are name brand!” Y metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 19

➺living my call

by ELIZABETH BENNETT

Real Girl Magazine for Real Girls ifteen years ago, God gave me a dream to create a magazine for teen girls that focuses more on inner beauty instead of outer beauty.

That dream became a reality in September 2011, when Real Girl Magazine was born.

F

I have always loved reading and writing. My dad was a professor and my mom was a librarian so I had a natural inclination and love for books and the written word. Growing up in Northport, Alabama, I loved to read The Tuscaloosa News everyday when it was delivered to our house. Since elementary school, I knew I wanted to be a writer. All of these things led me to major in print journalism. I began college in August 2002 and after transferring college three times, changing my major, going through my dad’s death and much more; I finally graduated from the University of South Alabama in December 2007. This was a glorious day for me and one that I worked very hard to complete.

I first moved to Mississippi in September 2008 to be a news reporter for a small newspaper. In August 2011, my husband and I were driving back from the beach when we made a stop in Mobile to have lunch with a friend from college. She asked me how the magazine was going. I had started and stopped the magazine a few times and was at the time working on writing a book. I told her I had put it off again, but that was what I was really passionate about. She said, “Why don’t you start it again?” And, she agreed to work with me and be my business partner. From that

Come

Celebrate

point on, things moved forward very rapidly.

It was definitely God that opened the doors for Real Girl Magazine to begin because it was a long journey getting to that point and starting a magazine is such a big job—you cannot do it on your own. Although I have been the only full-time staff member since the beginning, God has provided people and resources every time I needed them. We have had an excellent team of writers, photographers and graphic designers as well as interns from Mississippi College and Belhaven University.

When you go to the grocery store or WalMart and see magazines with scandalous women on the cover and pages filled primarily with a focus on outward appearance, it only exemplifies the need for Real Girl Magazine.

The media has had such a negative impact on young women from influencing them to focus on things that do not ultimately matter to providing fuel for eating disorders and unhealthy self-image issues. Real Girl Magazine is a quarterly magazine for teen girls that is positive and promotes Biblical values such as purity and modesty. The magazine is also a platform for the arts and it features original artwork and poetry from readers in every issue.

Youth Solutions is presenting the Real Girl Magazine One Year Birthday Celebration. It is on January 26, 2013 from 3:00-5:00 p.m. in the

Jackson Medical Mall Community Meeting Room. There will be entertainment from college and high school choirs, dancers, and local artists’ artwork will be displayed. This will be an opportunity to join in the celebration and find out about how you can get involved with the magazine. Please come out to the Birthday Celebration and celebrate with us! For more information, visit www.realgirlmag.com or like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter.

I know this is what God has called me to do and He has so graciously given me talents to

I want to make a positive difference in the lives of young women and provide resources for them that are encouraging and uplifting. use and the opportunity to use them. I want to make a positive difference in the lives of young women and provide resources for them that are encouraging and uplifting. I am grateful to be able to be the editor and publisher of Real Girl Magazine and hope it can continue for the glory of God! Y Elizabeth Bennett is the founder and publisher of Real Girl Magazine.

Contact her at Elizabeth@Realgirlmag.com

Real Girl Magazine’s First Birthday!

Saturday January 26, 2013 3:00-5:00 p.m.

Jackson Medical Mall Community Meeting Room Sponsored by: Enjoy LIVE ENTERTAINMENT, win door prizes & more! www.realgirlmag.com 20 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Checking Out of the Hospital?

It’s Time to Sta-Home.

Leaving the hospital doesn’t mean you have to leave expert medical care behind.

Sta-Home works hand-in-hand with your doctor to provide professional care in your home. Sta-Home’s nurses and therapists offer the expert medical care you need, in the place that truly makes you feel better. Ask your doctor if home healthcare is right for you. And then, ask your doctor to call Sta-Home.

The right care. The right place. The right choice. www.sta-home.com | .. | A Mississippi Home Health and Hospice Provider.

Medicare, Medicaid, or private insurance may cover home healthcare services.

Jackson Prep 2012 Championship Football Team Boasts 17 Eagle Scouts.

Did you know that less than 5% of Boy Scouts earn EAGLE SCOUT rank? ✓ This year, 17 Jackson Prep Varsity Football Players (20% of the team) are Eagle Scouts. ✓ They are champions both on and off the field! ✓ Who says scouting isn’t cool?

Tell that to these guys!

FRONT (L to R): Peyton Parker, Carl Upton, Wesley Kerce, John Gathings, Ryan Buchanan, Harrison Putt, Harrison Moore and Cossar Morgan. BACK (L to R): Andrew Davidson, Will Keeler, Richard Baird, Campbell Vise, Charles McEuen, Hollis Burrow, Burney Threadgill, William Townsend and Wilkes Skelton

BOY SCOUTS OF AMERICA®

“On behalf of the Andrew Jackson Council, we are amazed and very proud of not only these 17 Eagle Scouts and their championship team, but also of Jackson Prep and Susan Lindsay for promoting this level of excellence. America needs more leaders like this!”

– Andy Wimberly, Council President

“Preparing Young People For Life”

FIND US ON FACEBOOK @ Hood Scout Reservation, BSA or Andrew Jackson Council, BSA •

www.bsa-jackson.org metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 21

➺chewed petunias

by SUSAN E. RICHARDSON

Courage to Speak “Therefore I will not keep silent; I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit, I will complain in the bitterness of my soul” (Job 7:11).

In 2008 I wrote an article called “And Sometimes I Feel Like a Chewed Petunia” for Metro Christian Living about the ways life can yank us up and chew us down. I told my story of peer abuse, comparing my life to a petunia my dog, Libby, had pulled out of its pot and chewed to the roots. The petunia survived to bloom, and I did, too, after God led me through a period of healing and growth.* My journey began in a place I didn’t choose, with pain I didn’t want.

We don’t choose how people or circumstances rip up our lives and leave jagged holes in our sense of self. The pain that follows is not our choice, but something we must learn to live through and around.

Whether we’ve suffered abuse, betrayal, or some other trauma, something turns our world upside down.

When something or someone first rips us up, the shock and pain often prevents us from seeing anything around us. Intense pain pulls the focus inward. Just bearing the pain requires all our resources. We may live for years coping as best we can.

School was like that for me. I never knew from the time I got on the bus in the morning until I returned home in the afternoon when my peers might verbally attack me. I tried developing different ways to deal with the pain and uncertainty. Sometimes I overachieved. Often I underachieved so my grades wouldn’t make me a target. I tried becoming invisible and staying out of the way. Occasionally I tried to stand up and retaliate, but that didn’t work, either.

My attempts reflected the stages of grief, where shock and denial come first. Shock numbs us to the damage and denial leads us to try to fix things on our own, because, after all, nothing is really wrong.

Eventually anger moves in, as it did for me. I lived many years angry with God and estranged from Him even though I went through the motions of living a Christian life. Since we may grieve several things at once, the stages don’t stay neatly arranged in order. Over the years I bounced around through a range of painful emotions.

Anger leads to depression, and often that brings us to a place where we recognize we need help. The Scripture above from Job shows us the way forward. He says, “I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit.” We each must choose to speak of what caused our pain.

Doing so puts whatever situation we’re facing out into the open. We can see issues better ourselves, but someone else may be able to help us see them, too.

When I knew I needed to talk about my pain, I chose to work with a Christian counselor. She gave me direction and insight I couldn’t find on my own. Choosing counseling can be a good decision. We need someone who has been through these areas before, who knows that, though we may not follow the exact path others have used, a way to healing does exist.

Something powerful happens when we put events into specific words. What method might work for you? You can journal, as I’ve often done, using the computer because I can type more quickly than I can write. Others prefer the slower, more contemplative process of handwriting thoughts.

Do you have a friend you can trust with your story? Not everyone can handle hearing another’s pain, so choose carefully. If you’re not sure, share small pieces and be sure the person is safe. Or simply spend time alone with God verbalizing your story. Speak to Him aloud or use a prayer journal.

In the mess of what fallen humans choose to do in this world, God can heal what has been broken. When the evil in this world yanks a human petunia out of his or her pot, God is there. He is here now, listening.

Father, give us the strength and courage to speak our pain, whether to You or another person. Draw us closer to You and bring us healing. We put ourselves into Your hands. Y (*To get started with the full chewed petunias story, please visit www.chewedpetunias.com. You’ll find the story plus other material that may help you along the way.)

Susan E. Richardson has a passion for meeting people’s needs through the written word. You can reach her by email at Susan@chewedpetunias.com or check either of her two websites: www.chewedpetunias.com or www.nextlevelcritiques.com 22 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Your “Happily Ever After� begins at Highland Village.

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➺healthy living

by MARILYN TINNIN

Pilates V Studio

Q&A with Vivian Taylor MCL: What makes the Pilates method unique?

VIVIAN: Developed by Joseph Pilates, the Pilates method is unique in that it is ageless and emphasizes the mind and body as correlates to transforming the total body. Anyone at any age can do Pilates, while gaining greater awareness of the body and its integrated parts in relation to holistic development.

MCL: What are the major benefits of a regular Pilates class?

VIVIAN: Pilates enhances core strength, torso stability, posture, balance, flexibility, agility, and range of motion among clients. It is also associated with back pain reduction, improvements in the ability to sleep, as well as stress reduction. The method additionally helps clients to become stronger, leaner, more confident, and graceful—while also helping to improve energy. The more they move, the more energy they have; and the more energy they have, the more they move. The results can lead to flat abs, strong abs and backs, and toned bodies. And equally important, our clients have lots of fun engaging in the Pilates method.

Some of them actually take two classes per day. (Hi Susan, Christine, and Kate!)

MCL: How does the Reformer machine work?

VIVIAN: The Pilates reformer is a flat, bed-like platform with a movable carriage, which rolls back and forward within the frame.

Progressive springs, with various levels of resistance, are attached to the carriage—allowing it to be pushed and pulled along the frame of the reformer. Body weight, coupled with the springs, facilitates movement on the carriage, while lying down, sitting, or standing on the machine. The 24 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Vivian (far right) at the studio’s grand opening.

movement results in eccentric muscle contractions, which lengthen muscles as they resist the tension of the springs. An adjustable headrest, shoulder blocks, foot bar, handles, and straps are also attached to the reformer, allowing clients to be comfortable, supported, and safe in the execution of movements on the machine.

At first glance, the Pilates reformer can appear intimidating to some, but once they are orientated to its use, they can’t wait to climb aboard in the context of private sessions or small group classes.

MCL: What kind of training did you undergo to be a Pilates instructor?

VIVIAN: During my initial college experience, I was a health and physical education (PE) major where I was first introduced to Pilates in my curriculum. When I moved to Kentucky, I served as assistant manager for She Physical Fitness Spa and was trained and taught Mat Pilates.

Summarily, my training has involved integrated coursework, training workshops, observation hours, studio hours taking classes, and taking a certification examination. I am currently certified in the Pilates Method through the Leslee Bender Training Academy—one of the leading training centers in the industry—and through the American Sports and Fitness Association.

MCL: How young and how old should someone be to take Pilates?

VIVIAN: One of the great advantages of Pilates is that any age group—children, teens, adults, and senior citizens—and both males and females, can do it. Baby Boomers are especially attracted to Pilates

because it places less stress on joints and muscles and is basically low impact. It is important to note, however, that as with any form of exercise, clients should consult their doctors before beginning an exercise program.

MCL: Can Pilates help weight loss?

VIVIAN: That is a good question! Pilates in combination with proper nutrition does support weigh loss, yielding the appearance of a trimmer, more toned body. Although Pilates is generally done somewhat slowly, it can be done in acceleration, at the intermediate and advanced levels, to expend greater energy needed to burn calories. Using the Pilates jumpboard accessory, which can be attached to the reformer, also allows for a high level of cardio workout. Weight loss results from a balance of good food, nutrition, and lifestyle choices, combined with exercise.

MCL: Tell us about yourself and why you chose to open up a Pilates studio?

VIVIAN: I am an educator, professional consultant, and community advocate for children. I am very concerned about the alarming statistics related to obesity and its impact on health and wellness, particularly in Mississippi. I believe that education, awareness, and exercise are key to helping to improve the outlook on this issue.

Fitness has always been an integral part of my family’s life. As an only child growing up in Kentucky during snow months, my husband’s bench

press was our son’s best friend. My husband ensures that exercise equipment is a mainstay in our home décor—a point that does not always thrill me!

In planning for my second career, I wanted to do something meaningful, enjoyable, and beneficial to others and myself—and I knew that opening a Pilates studio would be the answer. The studio will serve not only as a place to exercise, but will also serve as a community outreach engine helping to enhance public awareness regarding the importance of incorporating fitness in our lives. With my knowledge, training, experience, and teaching skills, I hope to be a small part of the catalyst for change in the fitness arena—whether I am in the Pilates studio, in school settings, in the faith-based community, or in workplaces.

After all, what good is it to create a “bucket list,” and not be physically fit to enjoy it?

MCL: Anything else you want to add?

VIVIAN: I’m glad you asked! Our studio specializes in reformer-based classes that infuse the use of top-of-the-line reformers, towers, magic rings/circles, stability balls, bender balls, kettle bells, hand weights, gondola poles, dowels, Pilates boxes, and gliders, to enhance fitness in both small group and private class sessions. We have been blessed to work with a diverse clientele of beautiful people, inside and out, and we look forward to seeing them each day! Y

“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”– Joshua 24:15

GAMEROOM GALLERY 660 Ridgewood Road • Ridgeland, Mississippi

601-853-7777 www.gameroom-gallery.com metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 25

➺pastor’s perspective

by GARY MAZE

The Unified Life THE SHEMA “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates” (Deuteronomy 6:4-9).

A

As each year passes, it seems that life speeds up with an exponential increase in the number of opportunities, demands, and distractions. Like most of the people I know, I often find myself evaluating and assigning priority levels to most aspects of my daily life. Each task can be given a ranking based on time, urgency, and my ability to address its needs with efficiency.

While each season has specific challenges, some logically demand greater increments of time and energy than others. Some stages of life— becoming a newlywed, living the joys and stresses of parenthood, realizing an empty nest, and dealing with the shifting responsibilities of caring for aging parents—stick out in my mind. In light of our busy world, it has been my observation that nearly everyone has a tendency to compartmentalize competing demands for attention. As I’ve strived to consider my life in the context of a Biblical worldview, I’ve gained perspective with age and I’ve come to see compartmentalization as a plan for life management that left unchecked can have a dark side.

The first step toward avoiding a problem is often to define and analyze it in order to avoid its pitfalls. A simple definition of compartmentalization is to place two or more values, demands, beliefs, or responsibilities in separate mental compartments for the sake of control or management.

Psychological compartmentalization has been defined as a defense mechanism to avoid cognitive dissonance—the discomfort caused by conflicting ideas, beliefs, values, or demands.

Clearly, disciplined focus to meet important or urgent needs can be accomplished by compartmentalizing. For instance, dropping less urgent tasks to care for a medical emergency, or mentally deciding to think about some troublesome issue at a later time can be helpful. However, separating our life into isolated compartments without the benefit of an applied Christian worldview can be disastrous.

Unhealthy compartmentalization is easy to spot in high profile cases of “hypocritical” behavior. For instance, when a Christian leader is caught in adultery, or when a secret sin is made known to others, many of us say to ourselves, “What were they thinking?” However, there is a more subtle, spiritually debilitating compartmentalization that is less obvious. This might be evidenced by the business person who sees a clear demarcation between their “religious” or “church” life and their “business” life. Maybe it’s the sports fan separating “church” language from “game day” language, or the parent who says, “Do as I say, and not as I do.” Why are we so misaligned in our beliefs and behaviors? How do we align our lifestyles Biblically? What does the Bible say?

The starting point for living a life from a Biblical worldview is to examine the scripture with the intent of not only understanding God’s

26 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

character, but with a yielded heart committed to applying the truth to our lives. It is a process not suddenly realized, but rather one that we, as Christians, constantly seek to gain through prayer, the study of scripture, and fellowship in Christian community. Threaded throughout scripture are countless passages both describing God’s character and mandating our behavior.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9, known as the Shema, is one of the most quoted passages in the Old Testament. For three millennia, Jews have quoted this passage, or portions of it, in daily prayers. Christians often point to these touchstone statements as a sweeping command from God to transmit our faith to our children. Certainly, the passage demands we use every experience in life for the sake of teaching that we are to love the Lord our God with all of heart, our soul, and our strength. Yet, central to this passage is the call to seek God as the Lord over every area of one’s life.

The fact that the Shema begins with an acknowledgement of God being one cannot be overstated. This understanding that God is One stood in stark contrast to a world which had assigned false deities to virtually every known celestial body, environmental condition, and life experience.

The danger of compartmentalizing without a Biblical worldview is that while we maintain control over some parts of our life, we can easily rationalize our failure to apply godly principles to other parts—out of sight, out of mind. The simple truth is many of us will be faithful to our spouse, but not faithful financially. We’ll teach a Sunday School class, but treat colleagues and employees poorly. We’ll have a quiet time, but fail to yield to the transforming power of the Spirit that brings His patience to difficult circumstances. I, for one, want to begin the year with a fresh surrender to the one God and His transforming power in every area of my life, not just in self-serving categories of my own choosing. Y Gary Maze is the Associate Pastor at Broadmoor Baptist Church in Madison, Mississippi. Gary has been in the Jackson area for over 35 years. During that time, he has served as a church planter, Executive Director for Youth for Christ, and has been an adjunct faculty member at Belhaven University. He and his wife, Kathy, have two children: Josh, a worship pastor at Highpoint Church in Memphis, Tennessee; and Karleigh, a sophomore at Mississippi College.

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by GLEN ALLISON

he leadership of Drake Bassett, new president of Palmer Home, was forged in the corporate canyons of New York—and nurtured by God’s grace.

T

I am frowning.

My tires spin in the Connecticut snow as I make my way up the hill to the house with the red door. Behind that door awaits the man and his family who will be moving to Mississippi to lead Palmer Home for Children.

Snowflakes float, the wheels gain traction. Up I go to meet the future.

Each doily of ice might as well be one of the myriad questions in my mind. Will this man be right for Palmer Home? Does he know what he’s getting into? Will he love these kids as much as they deserve? I answer them quickly, the unspoken queries inside my head, with assurances of God’s sovereignty that He has guided the process to His satisfaction.

Still, the honest questions swirl. Here we go.

“Funny thing, it was a snow like this one, except worse, back in October (2011). The Palmer magazine had just come in the mail,” says Drake Bassett.

We are standing inside the relatively modest home. I’ve stomped the snow off my boots and now we are warming by the fireplace. “The power was out,” Drake continues, “and we were reading by the fire right here to stay warm. The search company had sent a packet of information on Palmer, so the magazine was passed around to 28 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Kelley, Drake, Claire and Hope

my family and they read it by firelight. They looked at me and said, ‘This is you,’ and that was the start of it all.”

Of course, that wasn’t really the start of it all, in God’s providence. But it seems like a nice confirmation. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

We have a few moments before eating a home-cooked meal so I get a chance to just hang out with Drake for a while. We snap a few photos of him for the magazine. We make small talk about the weather. I keep observing him, not just visually but emotionally. Who is this man and what makes him tick? What has made him decide to give up being CEO of a big company with headquarters in New York City to become president of a relatively small ministry for children in Mississippi?

Drake, of course, keeps turning the tables on me, wanting to know about me, about my background, about my involvement with Palmer Home.

Outside the snow still flutters. Inside the warmth of the home, I’m beginning to thaw out now.

Other family members stroll through the den to meet me. Kelley is Drake’s wife of 24 years, a woman of quiet strength with a quick, gentle wit that appears long enough to make you want to see more of her humor; Hope, a 12-year-old with the well-curbed intelligence of someone twice her age at least; and Claire, a high-school senior with a calm spirit and the look of a volleyball star. The other two Bassett offspring—Evan, 21, and Grace, 20—are off at

college in Kentucky and Florida.

More small talk ensues as I walk with Drake throughout the first floor of the house. The house isn’t overly decorated, a positive thing in my opinion. In fact, I realize that it has the feel of a comfortable lodge—an exceedingly pleasant impression. The more I ponder it, the more I see that the house reflects this family: accessible but not effusive, warm but not intrusive, attractive without ostentation. After a while, I stop analyzing how they come across. I just enjoy their presence.

Besides, lunch is calling.

The kitchen and dining room share an open space surrounded by windows overlooking a small deck and the bare branches of hardwood trees glazed with snow. Tiny dark birds flit about a feeder outside the window above the sink, their playfulness backlit by the brightness.

Homemade chicken hot pockets, broccoli casserole, and fresh fruit appear on the tabletop.

Somehow I’ve failed to mention my low-carb eating regimen. By the time the chocolate pie arrives, I’ve become resolute in my determination to set aside this day in my conscience.

The conversation roams undirected. They raised chickens for a while living in upper New York at a property that actually included a working stable. “Yes, we loved having fresh eggs and the chickens were like pets,” says Kelley.

(Kelley’s uncle raises a few chickens at his suburban Tampa home. One of the hens will actually come and sit in his lap) “Yes, we learned about horses and horse owners, a special breed

unto themselves,” says Drake. And back to food talk. “One of the challenges of moving back to the South is the wonderful food. Everything begins and ends with a biscuit,” says Kelley.

Young Hope sits at the table quietly knitting a small square of fabric. It’s part of a project that her home-school association has designed.

The squares knitted by children in the group will be sewn together into a quilt to be donated to a woman’s shelter in nearby Danbury, Connecticut. I’m impressed both by this girl’s willingness to join in the project and her casual knitting, surrounded by so-called adults, while interjecting a point or two into the conversation.

The pie has been served with coffee. It’s the first dessert I’ve had in months. I only eat one piece. I promise. Ask them.

The table talk circles back to Palmer Home without my urging. Drake has visited both campuses and the horse farm, spending time with board members and houseparents and staff.

Kelley and Hope came down last December and came away with friendships already taking root.

Hope plays Words with Friends on Facebook almost daily with Deborah, wife of Columbus director Steven Scott.

“When we touched down back here after that visit and were driving back home on the interstate, it struck me: We would have time to rest and plan our next week in relative calm but those houseparents at Palmer Home were right there in the middle of it all the time. That sort of commitment is uncommon. And it is valuable,” says Kelley. metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 29

Drake agrees. “When I read the centennial issue of The Southern Charity Ledger, I saw what a fantastic background the Lord has laid for His work through Palmer Home. It is humbling to me, to see what Dr. Waldron has done; those are big shoes to fill but I’m excited to get started. I’m appreciative of the foundation that has been built, down to the daily work of the houseparents, and I’m ready to go at it full speed.”

Again, I’m getting ahead of myself. We are just talking around the table. Finally, I get all writerly and ask the question: “How did you get to this point where you are leaving your job in the corporate world to lead a ministry?”

And he tells me.

“I grew up as a preacher’s kid, I lived in a lot of different places and saw a lot of things from many angles, many opportunities for service. I saw how people approached that service in various ways. I saw it as a privilege, that chance to serve. And you don’t always know how it’s going to play out for you.” Though his father led a church, Drake was never pushed to consider that being a “professional” minister was the only avenue of Christian service.

Drake worked his way through college at The University of South Florida and ended up with a Bachelor of Arts degree in History and Russian Language. He relates that his career began with a big “No!” from God. “I was fully engaged in a student co-op program with IBM while at college. But I had set my mind to become a military officer with an emphasis on Military Intelligence. So I took Russian Language and joined the U.S. Army’s Officer Corps. I loved the leadership training, boot camp, and for two years prepared to be an Intelligence Officer. In the final stretch, I was 30 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

exited on a medical release due to a loss of high frequency hearing. It was a small item to generate a discharge, but it was a big deal to me at the time. Over the years, I’ve come to see that the Lord had other things in mind, and as our family began to grow, so did my career.”

He entered the work world at IBM, a place that taught him a lot about managing people and team work. With his career firmly locked into the business world, he put his relationship with God first, a commitment shared by his wife Kelley. Various ministry commitments beckoned the young couple from the early days of marriage. “We’ve had the privilege of working with children through the years—little kids, grade school, high school—so I’ve also gained a comfort level with them and have had the opportunity to see them in different circumstances.”

He also actually taught Sunday school classes at churches they attended and even served as a minister part time in churches that were transitioning between pastors. All the while, Drake and his growing family were being relocated to different parts of the United States as his career grew.

His position with IBM as a Junior Account Executive in Tampa, Fla. was a blessing from the Lord in many ways. “It was my first fulltime position in a business environment. I was proud to work for such a great company but the greatest satisfaction came from learning that the essence of business providing a service or product that solved a problem for clients. I also learned that I was good at building relationships and I took pleasure in delighting customers.”

After five years in that job, he was selected as a Senior Account Executive for Strategic Mapping, Inc., in San Jose, California. SMI was a software development company specializing in geo-demographic applications. Drake was chosen to open an Atlanta office for the company and, when SMI was acquired by another company, Claritas, in 1996, Drake became Director of Sales & Client Service.

While at that position, he was recruited by the former CEO of Strategic Mapping to become Regional Manager for another new software company, Prism Solutions, also in Atlanta. At Prism, Drake helped launch a new product initiative, but the fit was better for him back at Claritas, where he returned as Vice President of Business Development.

It was at Claritas he received recognition in a series of positions with increasingly expansive responsibilities. He and his family moved to Ithaca, New York to become General Manager and Senior Vice President. While at that position, he was requested by the president of the company to assume all human resource functions as the chief HR Resources Officer.

From there he was promoted to Chief Operating Officer and, then, the top job—Chief

Executive Officer, overseeing 250 employees and more than $90 million in annual revenue.

Claritas, a division of Nielson, is the leading provider of consumer segmentation and local market insights for a wide range of industries. It serves more than 1,800 clients, from Fortune 100 leaders to small businesses.

Around the dinner table, the coffee is savored as whiteness piles up on the deck outside the French doors. It’s something I might not see again for a while, maybe never again in this New England setting. I drink it in, the soft sprinkling of white that blurs all hard lines outside.

Inside, the conversation flows easily. Drake talks with enthusiasm about his business experience. He obviously has enjoyed it, all the challenges, all the clients served, all the people he has helped motivate and manage to become better at what they do.

So, when did he decide to abandon all that and go in another direction?

“In the past two or three years, we were in a church that became increasingly involved in the community, and in mission work with the poor in Jamaica, among other places,” Drake shares.

“We found ourselves becoming students of hands-on ministry. I thought to myself, ‘Some day, why can’t I take these business skills and use them in a different context, where my 12or-14-hour days aren’t spent in dealing with products and services, but actually doing something we are passionate about, something with eternal value.”

That question circulated through his consciousness for months until finally, in the spring of 2011, he did a preliminary search on the Internet to find out “what was out there” in the way of ministry leadership opportunities.

“At that time, I was thinking the next three-tofive years I might make a change. I didn’t know what the direction would be.” In the same logical step-by-step fashion that typified his success in the business world, Drake was formulating a schedule of possibilities.

As He is wont to do, however, God had arranged his own timetable in this situation.

“I had talked to a guy in my church, Phil Smith. He had left the corporate world and went to work with World Relief in Rwanda as director of the ministry for that region. He told me that this was a journey, that I wouldn’t just be able to ‘make things happen,’ but that I’d pray about it and keep my eyes open and when the Lord brought the right opportunity, I’d know it.”

Drake and Kelley began talking about the possibilities, about the things their family needed to work through to make a transition.

He still, however, had the mind-set that it was a process of years in the future. He continued his Internet searches to research the types of positions available.

In the fall of 2011, Drake had progressed to the point of discovering organizations that actually specialized in helping people transition from the corporate world to ministry. One of them was called SIMA International. On their website they listed leadership positions that were open. One of them was for the presidency of Palmer Home.

“I thought it might be an exercise in futility, but I took a step, of sorts,” remembers Drake.

This was last October.

In addition to his attraction to Palmer’s mission, there was another contributing factor that made the position intriguing: Drake’s parents had moved to the Memphis, Tennessee, area. Still he proceeded with his preconceived notion of a comfortable timetable. He called SIMA. “You may have already found someone,” said Drake.

No, they haven’t found the right person yet, SIMA responded.

“Well, we are probably in two different galaxies,” said Drake.

Doesn’t it sound like he was giving the Lord every opportunity to close that door?

The discussions continued on and off, without pressure. Drake kept noticing other possible directions for him. But he kept drifting back to Palmer Home’s opening, looking at it, noticing it. Even while wondering if the time was right, he agreed to come visit the campuses.

Kelley piped up. “Oh I know what’s going to happen, you’re going to go down there and you are going to come back and this is what you’re going to want to do.” “She knows most of the time what is going to happen before it does,” says Drake. “As soon as he called, I said, ‘Okay, let’s start packing. I told a friend that our life was about to turn upside down,” remembers Kelley.

Drake chuckles. “It was one thing to read about a place up here in snowy Connecticut and another to actually meet them, to see it face to face.”

Within an hour of his first meetings with the Palmer search committee, Drake had connected with the heart of the organization.

“You can tell pretty quickly how people are wired, how they are grounded, what their faith is, what their passion is. I felt privileged to be in their presence. I remember thinking, ‘I don’t know where this is going, but I do know I have connected with some great people in a great organization and, in some way, I was going to be involved with them.”

And the Palmer search committee shared Drake’s feeling. “When we met Drake, we immediately had a good feeling about him, about his experience and his abilities, but most of all about how he had sought the Lord in his quest to find His will,” says Charles Guest, interim president of Palmer Home. “We were thankful for how God had brought someone like Drake Bassett to help lead Palmer Home for Children.”

We say our goodbyes and swap embraces as I gather my camera goodies and pack them in the backpack. Outside the snow has stopped.

The sun glitters on gilded branches.

The house is warm and, I’ve learned, that warmth lives inside this brave, blessed family.

They are our family now, all of us who call ourselves lovers of the children of Palmer Home for Children, who have received the immeasurable treasure of seeing a smile where none had crossed before. It is a time like this I thank God for my job even more than usual.

I trudge through the snow with the careful steps of a Southern boy in a realm infrequently experienced. The car starts up just fine and the wheels make their tentative way back down the hill.

And I am smiling. Y Glen Allison (glen@netga.com) is the author of the Forte suspense novels (http://torturedhero.com).

ABOUT PALMER HOME FOR CHILDREN History: Founded in 1895 by Presbyterians and other concerned friends, Palmer Home remains committed to helping children achieve their full God-given potential, however scarred or shattered their family background. Palmer Home for Children is a ministry to children in need; children who are growing up as social orphans without the nurture and support of a loving family.

It is a home for children who need a place to be and to become.

Goal: Palmer Home continues to be a leader as a privately funded organization with a Christ-centered mission to provide long-term care for children who lack adequate family structure.

How We Do It: Palmer Home is governed by a board of directors and does not accept government funding.We rely solely on private gifts generously donated. There are over two-dozen

house parents caring for anywhere from 75 to 95 children at a given time. A staff of nearly 50 manages and maintains the organization, oversee the well-being of the children and manage two 100+ acre campuses.

What Is Provided: Palmer Home is structured to provide longand short-term residential care and foster care as well as counseling and educational services for as long as necessary including higher education opportunity.

What Makes us Different: Palmer Home is faith-based and provides its services free of charge to needy children and families without regard to race or creed. They are able to serve large sibling groups who would otherwise be split up in state foster care. Y metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 31

➺food for thought

“My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of Him that sent me, and to finish His work.” – John 4:34

by LYDIA BOLEN

January Soup Medley Happy New Year! Have you made your New Year’s resolutions yet?

Whether you are on a diet, or resolving to eat healthier, a one-pot meal of soup with variety is a good start.

I love to make soup when it is cold outside. Soup makes a substantial, well-balanced meal. A bonus is that a pot of soup can feed the entire family—twice over. If you are one of those who prefer not to eat the same thing two days in a row, then freeze the remaining soup for a later date.

Get outside and enjoy this brisk cooler weather. When family members come in from the day, then “soup’s on”!

BAKED POTATO SOUP 4 2/3 2/3 6

4 12 1 1/4 1

large baking potatoes cup butter cup flour cups milk Salt (to taste) freshly ground black pepper (to taste) green onions, chopped slices bacon, cooked and crumbled cups Cheddar cheese, shredded cup sour cream (may use light)

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Wash the potatoes and pierce several times with a fork. Bake for 1 hour, or until soft. Cool. Cut the potatoes into halves and scoop the pulp into a bowl; discard the skins.

Melt the butter in a heavy saucepan over low heat. Stir in the flour. Cook for 1 minute, stirring constantly. Add the milk gradually, stirring well after each addition.

Cook over medium heat until thickened and bubbly. Continue stirring. Season with salt and pepper.

Add the potato pulp, 2 tablespoons of the green onions, 1/2 cup of the bacon and 1 cup of the cheese. Cook until heated well. Stir in sour cream. Add additional milk if needed for the desired consistency.

Sprinkle each serving with the remaining green onions, bacon and cheese, as desired.

Serves 6 to 8. Can be doubled and freezes well.

32 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

HAM AND LENTIL SOUP

CHEESE SOUP

1 ham bone (if you don’t have one, they can be purchased at Logan’s Farm or Honey-Baked Ham stores, and are very inexpensive) 6 cups water 1 1/4 cups dried lentils, rinsed 1 can (28 ounces) diced tomatoes, undrained 3 carrots, sliced 2 to 3 celery ribs, sliced 1/4 cup green onions, chopped 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano 1/8 teaspoon black pepper 12 ounces pork sausage, cooked and drained 2 tablespoons fresh parsley, chopped

3 6 1 2 1 1/2 1/2 1 3 2

In a Dutch oven, bring ham bone and water to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for one and one-half hours.

Remove ham bone. To broth, add the lentils, tomatoes, carrots, celery, onions, and seasonings; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 30-40 minutes or until lentils and vegetables are tender. Remove ham from bone; coarsely chop. Add the ham, sausage, and parsley to soup. Heat and eat.

Makes 10 to 12 servings.

tablespoons butter green onions, finely chopped rib celery, finely chopped cans chicken broth can cream of chicken soup teaspoon white pepper teaspoon garlic powder (or to taste) pound Velveeta cheese cups sharp Cheddar cheese, grated cups half-and-half cream (can use fat-free)

Sauté onions and celery in butter until soft.

Add chicken broth and soup; stir until smooth. Add seasonings and simmer on low for 20 minutes, covered. Add cheeses, then cream. Cook all on LOW heat for 20 minutes. Do NOT boil! Serve with crackers or cornbread. Makes 2 quarts. Y

Remember to make memories through the kitchen— “the heartbeat of the home.”

E-mail me at lbbolen@gmail.com for any questions.

modern motherhood

by ROBIN O’BRYANT

Resolutions From a Rule Breaker am vehemently against New Year’s Resolutions—for myself, anyway. By nature, I’m a rule breaker. If I say I’m giving up carbs for a week, I can think of nothing but pasta and bread constantly until I indulge. It’s not something I like about myself but it’s who I am. Whatever the rules are, I’m going to try to push the limit to see how much I can get away with.

I

The only resolution I’ve ever successfully kept was in 2010 when I resolved to stop buying clothes at Wal-Mart. My children were moving out of the “spit-up-wipe-my-nose-on-mommy” stage and it was time to stop dressing in the equivalent of a hazmat suit.

I needed motivation to exercise and not to “let myself go.” My solution was to bribe myself with clothes from exotic and expensive designers like Target and JC Penney. It worked, and for the first time in my life I successfully kept my resolution.

I’m not a fan of rules and resolutions, but I am a fan of reflection—without it, we continue to make the same mistakes.

Socrates said on Pinterest, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” (That was a joke. I know Socrates is still on MySpace.)

There’s no better time of year to pause and reflect on how you want to live your life than at the end of a year, as a new year stretches out in front of us. I’ve said it before, the gift that God has given us in the monotony of motherhood is that we have one million chances to get it right. As the New Year rolls in, I am taking time to pray, to look critically at how I spent my time and my resources last year and asking, “What can I do better? What can I give up? How can I give my kids and my husband the best version of me possible?”

I’m pretty sure of the answers I’m going to come up with: less online time, more Jesus time, more face time with my kids and husband, and continuing to wear my exotic, designer clothes. Y

Robin O’Bryant is mother to three daughters, wife to one husband, and debut author of Ketchup Is A Vegetable And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves. She shares the drama and hilarity of motherhood in her syndicated family humor column, “Robin’s Chicks” and on her blog by the same name (www.robinschicks.com).

metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 33

➺money matters

by DANNY WILLIAMS

Things to Consider in 2013 We have recently had the privilege of voting to elect our country’s 57th President.

Of course, we know who won at this point, but there was uncertainty until the results were tabulated on election night. The race seemed to become closer, according to the polls, as Election Day approached. It was anyone’s guess as to who would serve for the next four years. Some polls were showing a virtual tie and many thought that the difference would come down to key battle ground states like Ohio and Florida.

One of the most popular questions I was asked over the past few months was, “What will be the effect on the market if President Obama wins another term versus Governor Romney winning the election?”

34 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Many investors are looking for an edge on how to go forward with their investments. This is very understandable.

According to Fox Business, history shows that the U.S. economy, stock prices, and corporate profits have generated stronger growth under Democratic administrations than Republican ones.

According to McGraw-Hill, the S&P 500 has rallied an average of 12.1% per year since 1901 when Democrats occupied the White House, compared to 5.1% for Republicans. One thing that should be pointed out is that there is a relatively small sample size over the time period this information has been calculated.

I think back on the past several years of current events. The financial crisis of 2007-

2008 was devastating to many. Our own banking system and many other large, corporate businesses took significant losses, and many went out of business or merged into others. This housing bubble created this situation.

The recent uncertainty of a Presidential election and the worst housing bubble in our nation’s history has probably made you think a little more about your financial wellbeing. These are only two of the issues that have driven our market’s direction over the past number of months and years. To a great degree, there are many opportunities for us to allow our emotions to come into play when making our important investment decisions. Now, it seems like the impending “fiscal cliff” has captured the attention of

value of their account go through a major decline. Many of these professional managers have a disciplined approach and do a great job when the markets are favorable, but they still stay fully invested in the market during good and bad markets. Many times this leads to disappointing results. Someone

鵻鵼 Many investors are looking for an edge on how to go forward with their investments.

鵻鵼

the political and business world. Our political leaders are once again making decisions (or not) that can have an impact on our economy and the markets. This is another current event that make most investors even more concerned. It also makes them wonder how to be successful in this type of environment—and my experience has been that if we let emotions enter into our decision making process, we will usually be wrong.

There are many investment strategies in the market place. Many investment advisors and investors who will say, “I am just going to take what the market gives me and let asset allocation take care of my investments.” This is an especially easy decision after we have just enjoyed a 10% up year. The choice is not so easy when you have a 25-50% down year.

The market statistics point towards this type of experience occurring again—and the longer you stay in the market, the more likely you will experience one or more of these down periods. The decline is difficult enough, but living through the decline and recovery may take a decade. Unfortunately, this experience may occur when you are retiring or have limited earning capacity.

There are alternatives to adopting a buy and hold strategy or counting on asset allocation to take care of you. Some strategies have predefined rules that are put in place to reduce risk or volatility in the portfolio.

When I mention alternatives, I don’t necessarily mean investing in a mutual fund or separate account. There are many people who have turned their money over to a “professional money manager” just to see the

needs to be in a position to manage the manager, if hiring professional managers— and this person needs to have a predefined rule that is used to manage risk in a declining market.

When we are investing in the market, volatility will be a part of the process. Simply said, in order for you to benefit, you must be willing to accept negative returns during certain time periods. We wish that we could say otherwise but it’s one of the “givens.”

Our beliefs do not try to paint a picture of the future. Think about it for just a minute.

If we looked back just a year ago, we would not have been able to say for certain whom the Republican nominee would be, much less who would be the next President of the United States.

What strategy will you adopt to help navigate the future markets? It seems that many investors have selected an approach that requires them to treat all markets the same. We think there are times that we need to take advantage of a great long-term bull market or nice uptrend, but we also know that we need to make adjustments if we enter a period of stormy conditions. We believe it is imperative for us to keep our emotions out of the process, and to recognize changes that will take place along the way. We have to be willing to look for the signals that are given to us and act accordingly.

I encourage you to think about your past investment experiences and commit to ask thoughtful questions about how your money is being managed today, as well as plans for the next downturn.

Happy New Year! Y Danny Williams, CFP®, is a partner with Woodridge Capital, a registered investment advisory company located at 800 Woodlands Parkway, Suite 201, Ridgeland, MS. For more information, call 601-957-6006 or danny.williams@woodridge-capital.com.

metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 35

➺single still, single again

by AMY INGRAM

Happily Ever After in the Meantime was lying in bed earlier this week thinking about how often I dream about my knight in shining armor. How our story will be written, how he will propose, and how many kids we will have in our cute house with a red door and a white picket fence.

I

When will it be my turn?

Everyone else has someone.

Longings are not wrong; however, longings can become our idols if we don’t offer them back to Jesus.

36 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

I’d wager to say that most single folks longing for earthly companionship have some sense of mind wandering when it comes to the right person entering their lives. And sometimes I blame that on princess movies we watched when we were younger. You know, that beautiful perfect princess found by the perfect, most gorgeous man, and they live happily ever after in a beautiful castle. For girls, you grow up believing marriage is just that. And I would wager to think men probably dream their woman will be perfect just like the princesses.

But let’s be honest, that’s not reality.

I don’t want to sound like Debbie Downer, and I certainly believe we can have our own beautiful story written by our God above, so hear me out.

It all starts with our longings. Do you think longings are wrong? Listen to what David had to say in Psalm 38.

“All my longings lie open before you, Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you…”

(Psalm 38:8).

“I will wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God” (Psalm 38:15) Longings are not wrong; however, longings can become our idols if we don’t offer them back to Jesus. I find myself dreaming so much about the future and having that longing fulfilled, that I lose sight of the present. And when I live outside the present, I can’t glorify God in my daily life.

I had a very sweet friend recently tell me about a conversation she was having with a girl who didn’t understand why this season of singleness had to be so long, and had such a strong desire to see the end in sight. My friend, in a brief word, spoke all over me. She said, “Stop longing. Sit and rest. Enjoy his presence.”

Is it really that simple? Yes. “Be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10).

I’d be the first to tell you this is something I really have to wrestle through. Figuring out how to glorify God right now, in the present, and

seek Him as I wait. I have no concept of how much longer that wait will be, but I have to trust the Almighty God has his hand on it, and I long to soak up as much of this quiet time as I wait.

That does not mean that I don’t imagine the day my strong, handsome prince will come. I do believe it will be the perfect way that God intends and I will rest in that. In the meantime, as I fight through those dreams, and taking it to a place that doesn’t bring glory to God, I call on this verse from 2 Corinthians 10:5, “we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

So if you are anything like me and find yourself making up great love stories in your head, stop. It can quickly become an idol. Speak that verse over your thoughts.

This starts a new year—full of resolutions and a time to reevaluate where/who we are.

One thing I’ve learned over my years is that God is the only one who can change us. So my charge to you this 2013 is to wake daily and ask Jesus two things: (1) “to satisfy you, fully, with his unfailing love, that you may sing for joy and be glad everyday” (Psalm 90:14).

(2) “to search you and know your heart, and know your anxious thoughts. To see if there is any hurtful way in you, and lead you in the way everlasting” (Psalm 139:23-24).

Rest in this. He will answer, for he cannot deny His word: “…so is my word that goes out from my mouth: it will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it” (Isaiah 55:11).

Happy 2013! Y Amy Ingram is a Senior Account Executive at a local advertising agency. She lives in Madison with her little boo, Mabel. Feel free to contact her at amyeingram@gmail.com and/or follow her on twitter @ingramjackson.

outside in

by SHAWN DEAN

The Kingdom of Me ou see and hear that not only in Ephesus, but in almost all of Asia, this Paul has persuaded and turned away a considerable number of people, saying that gods made with hands are not gods at all. Not only is there danger that this trade of ours fall into disrepute,

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but also that the temple of the great Artemis be regarded as worthless and that she whom all of Asia and the world worship will even be dethroned from her magnificence” (Acts 19:26-27).

My grandfather, Charles Dean, was an architect. If you’re from here and in the construction industry, the name Dean and Dean/Associates should sound familiar. Although there was no interest in me—or skill set—to follow that trade, the family history adds to my appreciation of it.

In great architecture, the details are exhausting, the vision is big and bold and the work it takes to convert the vision to a tangible expression is enormous. It can have a significant effect on a community’s economy and notoriety. So before the work begins, the question that needs to be answered is why. Why build it? When I read the above passage from Acts 19, the question raised in my mind was, “Why would someone go through the trouble of building an extravagant temple to a manmade idol?”

Artemis was arguably the most exalted of the Greek deities, the twin sister of Apollo and the daughter of Zeus and Leto. She was the goddess of the hunt, virginity, childbirth, protector of young girls, and responsible for the bringing and relieving of sickness in women.

How someone could go so far as to believe such a thing is incomprehensible, but what’s even more ridiculous is that they built a monstrosity of a temple to worship this female goddess. It’s listed as one of the seven wonders of the ancient world; it was rebuilt seven times— and some say that the first construction took 160 years to complete and the second took 83 years.

I have set eyes on the wall of lofty Babylon on which is a road for chariots, and the statue of Zeus by the Alpheus, and the hanging gardens, and the colossus of the Sun, and the huge labor of the high pyramids, and the vast tomb of Mausolus; but when I saw the house of Artemis that mounted to the clouds, those other marvels lost their

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brilliancy, and I said, “Lo, apart from Olympus, the Sun never looked on aught so grand.”- Antipater of Sidon (Ancient Greek poet and writer who lived in the 2nd century B.C., he is credited with creating the list of the “Seven Wonders of the Ancient World”.)

Today, it’s rubble under the earth.

The Architect, the stone masons, the carpenters, the stone salesmen, the artists, the weavers, the sheetrock hangers, curtain designers, the temple priests, the guy at the gate punching the tickets, etc, are all dead.

Their memory is as gone as the pillars that held it upright.

Demetrius, the silversmith and entrepreneur, he’s dead. All the Paul haters in Ephesus that were in a rage because he slandered her, their bones have decayed by now. But Artemis, the great Artemis, she lives on. She just doesn’t go by that name anymore.

She changed it to The Goddess of Self; she lives in the Kingdom of Me. Artemis was just another bad excuse to disobey God and justify what satisfies the flesh. In the real world, it’s all about the glorification of me and how to build my kingdom. I refuse with a stiff neck to make painful sacrifices to the Kingdom of God until the Kingdom of Me is satisfied—whenever that is.

Every company I’ve worked for makes the Kingdom of Me its greatest priority. It’s where the money goes—stackin’ it up. It’s where the energy goes. It’s why we hold meetings and offer incentives. The reward is now. In 30 years in the work force, never, ever, ever-—and not even once—have we discussed how the company plans to build the Kingdom of God. Nothing has changed since the 7th century B.C. Their efforts were misdirected and served a purpose altogether perishable. Their lives a wash and their talents squandered and history repeats itself for a Goddess with a new name. All the while, the great Architect searches for employees who will build things eternal—and whose reward waits. Y Shawn Dean is Regional Sales Manager for Airflo Sales, Inc., located in Ridgeland, MS. He and his wife, Laura Beth, have three children, Isabelle, Ann Mabry, and Mary Frances. They live in Madison.

We believe that every moment matters. Maybe that’s why so many families believe in us when it comes to choosing a hospice provider. For more information or to receive our free DVD, “Hospice and Your Loved One,” call 601-983-3193. gentiva.com/hospice

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metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 37

➺let’s talk it over

by MIKE TRAYLOR, LMFT

Relationships Are a Risky Business ave you ever had a relationship with someone that seemed to be risky?

What I mean by risky is a relationship where you were hurt, betrayed, frustrated, or disappointed in the relationship with that person.Was that relationship painful to you?

How did that relationship make you feel?

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One behavior I have noticed, in others and myself, is that many of us avoid painful relationships at all costs. Nobody likes to get hurt.

That being said, how many risk-free relationships do you have? To my knowledge, I am not aware of any risk-free relationships that exist. All relationships involve some risk—and risk means the possibility of loss or injury.

Should we avoid loss or injury in our relationships? I believe this is a tricky question. Over the years, I have seen people in unhealthy relationships where it was evident they should have avoided them.

These were relationships where there was abuse or addiction involved, or they were one-sided relationships where one person was the giver and the other always the taker. On the flip side, I have seen people who do not want to take any risk relationally. Some want to know for certain how life is going to turn out for them. Others, once hurt, will no longer take any risk at all.

So how do you determine whether to take a relational risk or to avoid it? I know I have asked more questions to this point rather than providing any helpful information, but I think we all struggle with one or more of these questions at some point in our lives.

Here’s another question: In looking at the life of Jesus in the Bible, did He take many relational risks with people? I believe He did. In studying the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John), we can find many occasions where Jesus took relational risks with people. We can also read stories of Jesus asking His followers to take relational risks.

How many of us would choose 12 men, teach them for three years, and then leave them responsible for the future eternal fate of the human race? This is exactly what Jesus did. Jesus took a risk by entrusting the message of His life—God’s message of salvation—to 12 guys. And what was the result? One of them (Judas) betrayed Him, others fled before His crucifixion, and one of His three closest

38 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

disciples (Peter) denied three times even knowing Jesus! Again and again, we see that Jesus took risk after risk after risk relationally with His 12 disciples. Yet He never stopped believing in them, He never stopped loving them, and He never tried to protect Himself from being hurt, disappointed, betrayed, or even killed. It appears to me that Jesus was the ultimate risk-taker when it comes to relationships.

It’s interesting that the people closest to Jesus also took the most relational risks. Peter took a big risk in trusting Jesus about getting out of the boat and walking on water (Matthew 14:28-32). Eleven of the disciples died a martyr’s death for their commitment to the message about Jesus.

Often in the Christian life we are taught about the importance of being obedient to God’s commands. But how often are we challenged to take risks in our relationships so that we are obedient to the faith?

Acts 6:7 says, “Then the word of God spread, and then the number of disciples multiplied greatly in Jerusalem, and a great many of priests were obedient to the faith.” Becoming obedient to the faith means I must take some risks relationally with people. In reflecting on the idea of relational risk, it appears that the power of Jesus is made known and is seen most often where people have taken the most risk. Neither Jesus nor His followers appeared to play it safe at all where relationships were concerned.

So, what kind of life are we called to live as Christ followers?

Should we choose to play it safe and protect ourselves from being hurt or rejected? Or should we be willing to lay down our lives for others and take some risks with them? My hope for you in 2013 is that you will be given the opportunity to take some risks relationally with others. Maybe that means forgiving someone who hurt or betrayed you. It could mean mending a broken relationship or befriending someone who appears to be different from you. Or it might mean opening up and revealing something about yourself that does not paint you in a positive light—with the hopes of bringing healing and acceptance with another person. Taking these kinds of risks won’t guarantee relational success, but assuredly your faith will grow in 2013.

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Mike Traylor is a Marriage and Family Therapist at Summit Counseling and can be reached at 601-949-1949 or mtraylor@fbcj.org

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lagniappe

by TERRI HERRING

Women and Children Are at the Mercy of the Court his January 22, 2013, will mark the 40th Anniversary of Roe vs. Wade, the Supreme Court decision that legalized abortion right up until birth.

Over 55 million babies have died from abortion—more than all of our nation’s war fatalities combined. The so-called “War on Women” is actually a war on the unborn.

Women are the second victims of abortion.

Please let me make myself clear. We are not trying to make women feel worse about their decision to abort. We are striving to encourage women to choose life. Those of us who are endeavoring to end abortion want to make it unthinkable. For many, what is legal makes it is right, but abortion is the wrong solution for both mother and child.

Once again we find ourselves defending Mississippi’s new abortion regulations in the court. The new law HB1390 requires the abortion clinic doctors to obtain admitting privileges at a local hospital. The abortion industry has operated below the standards of the rest of the medical community for far too long. Outpatient facilities across the state require all physicians to have hospital admitting privileges. This requirement provides the best medical care possible for the patient if an emergency occurs. Doctors can follow their patients to the hospital to provide necessary care in normal circumstances. Hospitals also check the doctor’s medical background to be sure they do not have an unusually high number of injuries, ensure that they have malpractice insurance, and are qualified for the procedures they are performing. There are

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currently at least seven other states with similar laws that have been upheld. This is the last abortion clinic in Mississippi.

District Judge Jordan, a President Bush appointee, will have a hearing to determine whether the new law is Constitutional under Roe. The clinic will claim these are impossible standards to meet and that those who proposed the law were not concerned about women’s health, but are simply interested in closing the clinic. This simply is not true. We lobbied the legislature with pictures of women injured at an abortion clinic in Birmingham.

This clinic has the same abortion doctor and owner. After three women went to the emergency room in one day, the Alabama Department of Public Health closed the Birmingham clinic due to numerous violations. Mississippi has no obligation to keep an unsafe clinic open.

Elected officials must have the right to free speech and certainly have the right to be pro-life. Those who want this clinic open are openly opposing the law to remain open because they are pro-abortion. Women and unborn children are at the mercy of the court once again. The clinic must either meet the same standards as the rest of the medical facilities, or it will have to close unless the Judge issues a Permanent Injunction preventing the law from going into effect. We are reminded again of the importance of how a presidential appointee to any federal court is for life and determines the fate of all preborn children.

This abortion clinic aborts babies up to four months gestation. These second trimester

abortions are made possible because Dr. Carl Reddix is the “medical director” for the clinic; and while he supposedly does not perform any abortions, he provides the clinic with compliance to previous abortion laws. Just think—in 5 more months over one million families who are waiting for a newborn to call their own could adopt these babies.

If the last abortion clinic in Mississippi closes, it will be because it is unable to provide adequate care for women. It is a lie to say that abortion is simple, good healthcare for women.

Those of us who are involved in pro-life ministry see firsthand the physical and emotional wounds women suffer from abortion.

Our elected officials are outspoken about being pro-life. Suddenly we find ourselves defending our right to free speech to prevent it from being used against us in court. The intent of this law is to protect the health and safety of women. If it results in closing the last abortion clinic, then Mississippi will be a better place!

We will have a Memorial Service in the State Capitol Rotunda, Tuesday, January 22, at Noon to remember the lives that have been lost in this war on the unborn and discuss our PLAN for a future of equal protection under the law. Please help us bring Mississippi back to LIFE. Y Terri Herring, PLAN, (Pro Life American Network) www.terriherring.net terriherring@comcast.net

metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 41

➺legal advice

by WILLIAM B. HOWELL

10

Good Reasons to Plan Your Estate A further benefit gained with a Living Trust is that your chosen successor trustee can act for you during your lifetime if you should be unable to act for yourself, not just after your death, all without court.

Protect your spouse and children.

Only by putting into place the necessary and legally sufficient documents can a person appoint the chosen guardian for their minor children should both parents pass away before the children reach their majority. Assuring financial resources for your spouse and your children is only one of the benefits you will have.

1.

Avoid delay in getting your property to your beneficiaries.

Property (including money) passing through probate is held in your probate estate until an order of the probate court releases the property. If you plan to pass your property at your death by a Will, probate is the required process for distributing your property, and it will take time, sometimes years. Probate can be avoided. A Living Trust is a solution for most people, for lifetime protection as well as handling your estate at your passing. No court is involved and no order is needed.

2.

Are any extended family members dependent on you? Do you have a disabled adult child? Without special planning, your death may end the essential support you have been providing for an elderly relative and/or a disabled adult child. Even worse, if that disabled adult child is receiving governmental benefits, and then receives an inheritance from you, that child may lose those benefits. Instead, you can put into place a special needs trust which designates such a financially dependent adult as beneficiary, and the trust will continue to provide for these special family members after your death.

3.

What protection can you provide yourself and your family in the event of your own incapacity? No one plans to have dementia, stroke, or a disabling auto accident. Those planning ahead put into place proper documents naming the person or persons of their own choice to

4.

42 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Provide a legacy of thoughtfulness to your family. Good planning eases the burden for your surviving family.

Times of grief are stressful and not conducive to good decisions about important financial matters. Take that burden off of them by having your wishes spelled out, so that all is simple, not complicated. Also consider preplanning for your funeral arrangements.

7.

manage their financial and medical needs when they cannot manage for themself. And the proper authority must also be given. Powers of attorney are often not honored. A Living Trust is ideal for disability planning.

The wise person also executes an Advance Health-Care Directive specifying whom they want to make health-care decisions for them if they are not able to do so and what end-of-life decisions they want to be made. The Advance Health-Care Directive also allows you to direct that you be kept pain-free in your last illness.

But this document does not always work if you cannot speak up for yourself. In order to allow your family to communicate with your health care providers (your doctors and others) you will also need a HIPAA authorization to waive your federally imposed medical privacy restrictions.

Preserve the value of your estate by minimizing expenses of distribution. Good planning can significantly reduce the expenses necessary to transfer your assets to your intended beneficiaries. Being prepared is a must to keep unnecessary expenses from reducing the value of your estate, both during your lifetime and at your death.

5.

Appoint your personal representative of your estate. At your death, someone must act for you.

Hopefully, it will be someone you have chosen.

6.

Protect a family business. Planning allows you to put into place legal arrangements for the smooth transition of ownership and management of a family business. Not only will good estate planning help assure the continued good health of the business, but can protect those very important family relationships.

8.

Eliminate or minimize death taxes.

Only advance planning by married couples can save the death tax exemption of the first spouse to die. If you are single, good estate planning can help minimize, or in some cases, completely eliminate death tax liability.

9.

Support a favorite charity or your church. Estate planning can carry out your chosen gifting program. It doesn’t have to be complicated.

Many people leave something to their church, to Blair Batson Children’s Hospital, or other worthwhile entities. The charity benefits and you may well benefit in tax savings, too. Y

10.

William B. Howell is a member of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys and practices law in Ridgeland.

We are MOBILE! Metro Christian Living Now available in the palm of your hand.

Y FREE download at the App Store, Android Market, or by scanning the QR Code.

What Do You Know About a Living Trust?

Do you know the four critical documents for a complete estate plan?

• Why a Living Trust? Why not just a will? It really depends on what you want for yourself and for your family. How much protection do you want, or need?

• What about probate? A Living Trust is a great way to avoid probate, but is probate something you really want to avoid?

Do you know what probate actually is, and what it does? If not, you need to know, so you can make up your own mind.

• Are death taxes avoidable? For the vast majority the answer is “absolutely”.

• What about protecting your assets from the nursing home? Medicare pays only a tiny part, if any. And you pay the rest.

Or not. Mr. Howell coauthored the Mississippi edition of How to Protect Your Family’s Assets from Devastating Nursing Home Costs. These issues will be discussed in depth at the Seminar.

• Free Living Trust and Asset Protection Seminar. Get true insight into effective planning that actually works. Join us at one of these free and very entertaining Seminars. Nothing is being sold, just knowledge being given, and it’s yours absolutely FREE and with no obligation on your part whatsoever.

WILLIAM B. HOWELL Member of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys

Monday Jan. 14, Jackson Old Capitol Inn 226 N. State St. at 10:00 am or 2:30 pm

Tuesday Jan. 15, Pearl Holiday Inn Trustmark Park 10:00 am or 2:00 pm or 6:00 pm

• Free Books and More. You will also receive a free copy of the 31-page book The Living Trust and Estate Planning written

by Mr. Howell, who has forty years of legal practice experience in Mississippi. You may also receive a free, private consultation valued at more than $350.00. Reservations are required.

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1-800-524-4694 Wed. Jan 16, Madison Hilton Garden Inn 320 Mannsdale Road 10:00 am or 2:00 pm

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metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 43

➺welcome home

by KIM WOLINSKI

5to Declutter KEYS and Make Room for God Do you have clutter and disorganization that takes your energy away from living a peaceful, Spirit-centered life?

Does dealing with clutter leave little room for God? It’s easy to feel embarrassed, angry, frustrated, and even afraid when you can’t find something, lose items or waste time, energy, and money running out to buy the same things that you already own, but can’t find. This kind of mental and physical activity limits our connection to God, making no room for His Spirit to work through us easily.

Getting organized doesn’t have to be hard, but it is a consistent and mindful activity to keep a home—your sacred space—decluttered and streamlined. Here’s a simple way to think

44 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

about it: being organized means “being able to find what you need when you need it.” And, no matter how perfect a home may look, if you can’t find items, you’re still not organized.

In my 12 years of organizing in homes and offices across the country and teaching workshops on organizing, I find that there are just a few clear steps to set up, prep, and then do to get—and stay—organized for good.

Follow these 5 keys and remind yourself while decluttering that this IS your spiritual practice!

God is in the details and all space is sacred.

1.

Choose one room and then narrow it down to just a corner or small, doable space in that room.

income from all the work it takes to put on a garage sale. Otherwise, put in the next box.

2.

Schedule uninterrupted, exclusive time.

If you don’t make this serious and schedule in the time, it won’t happen.

Plan 30-90 minutes and more in some areas when you can. Shut off the phone and computer; tell everyone what you’re doing so that you are not interrupted.

You might however stay focused and ontask by asking for assistance.

• Re-purpose/Donate: Unless an item is completely worn out or ripped, etc., give it to thrift and let them decide. They have very big trash bins to dump it there if they can’t use it.

3.

Set a timer. In order to not get overwhelmed, set a timer for increments of the allotted time so that you don’t feel anxious and quit early.

4.

Collect your “prep” tools. Specific containers as listed below will keep you in the room and from zig-zagging around getting little done.

• Have basic cleaning supplies available.

• Sorting boxes/containers. Label them when necessary to simply remember what they are for.

• Trash Can: For real trash, i.e., if something can be used or donated don’t put it into the trash which goes directly to the landfill.

• Shredder: For paper that has important data that could be used against you if stolen.

• Recycle: For glass/paper/plastics.

• Reroute: When you find something in the room you’re working in that belongs in another room or to someone else, sort it into the reroute box. Then, when you’re all finished, or your time is up, take this box around and drop off the items where they belong. This box will really keep you in the room, otherwise, you know what happens; you take that little sticky note you found out to the kitchen and never come back!

• Repair • Garage Sale: Use only if you really have a lot of items and could make some good

• Gift and Re-Gift: Ahh, the fun box!

You’ve received those gifts that are great, but—you’ll never use them, right? Put a note on the item of who gave it to you (so that you don’t re-gift it to them!) and then put in the box, ready to re-gift to someone in the future who might like it!

5.

Dive in! I call this sorting activity “Chunk and Chip.” Take one “chunk” at a time, whether clothes from a closet, shoes, toys, paper piles, etc. and then “chip” away at it until you’re done. Don’t move onto the next chunk until you’re finished with the pile. This is very important because if you start zig-zagging around, grabbing from other areas and piles, you’ll easily feel overwhelmed and quit.

How much room for God do you want in your home, your sacred space? Even Jesus warns us about mistaking our material goods for our value and having too much in Luke 12:15, “a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” Realistically, you only use 20% of what you have, 80% you will never use or see again. You are not your stuff. Cull back closer to the 20% and really enjoy what you have, enjoy your home and life more, inviting others in to play and pray more often. Y Kim Wolinski, MSW “Dr. DeClutter” is a stress, change and organizational skills expert, international speaker, professional organizer, lifestyle coach and the author of several books, including Letting Go With All Your Might, A guide to life transitions, changes, choices and effective redecisions; Burn Your House Down!

And 99 Other Ways to Create an Organized Life; How to Organize Important Documents and others to help you let go of clutter on every level. Kim lives in Longmont, CO. www.DrDeClutter.com

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➺salt & light

by KIMBERLY GRACE BOWMAN

The Child Evangelism Fellowship “…He said to them,‘Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.’ Then He took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them” (Mark 10:14-16). ver the past century, our children have become more and more vulnerable to the garbage of this world. They have easily become unguarded victims

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of what this world tries to offer them. And some have even been left without knowledge of the salvation and saving love of Jesus who came to give us life and joy. Whether it be because they have never heard a message from within church walls or have simply never been told of the amazing love Jesus has offered to each and every one of them, the Child Evangelism Fellowship is one of many ministries who work consistently to bring Jesus to this younger generation inside—and especially outside— church walls.

In 1937, God placed within Jesse Irvin Overholtzer the desire to reach out to young children who, unlike many adults, could understand the message of the salvation of Jesus if they were to be taught in a manner they could comprehend. As a child, Mr. Overholtzer was told he was too young to understand salvation. Jesse Overholtzer would not receive Jesus as his Savior until his college years as result of these comments. Later in his life as a pastor, Overholtzer was inspired by one of Charles Spurgeon’s sermons and the statement within, “A child of five, if properly instructed can as truly believe and be regenerated as an adult.” Therefore, Pastor Overholtzer at age 60 founded the Child Evangelism Fellowship. Since its founding, the CEF has grown into state divisions, overseas missions, and a resulting 12 million children who have been impacted through the tireless efforts of the CEF to fulfill the Great Commission.

In recent years, the public school system has become a frequent target of the enemy to introduce un-Godly teaching and ideas into the hearts and minds of young children, while the truth that comes from God 46 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

is usually left outside of the school building.

The CEF is one method that God is using to greatly impact the children within the public school systems for the glory of Christ.

Among the many avenues within the Child Evangelism Fellowship, the CEF utilizes a program called Good News Clubs to reach out to children within public settings such as the public school system. Although the CEF has been in operation since 1937, a Supreme Court ruling passed in 2001 allows religious organizations such as the Child Evangelism Fellowship to meet in public schools.

These Good News Clubs, which serve as the flagship program of the Child Evangelism Fellowship, are primarily weekly half-hour classes which are led by trained teachers who minister the gospel to young children. A typical Good News Club is usually started by a church, which chooses to adopt a school under the name and supervision of the Child Evangelism Fellowship.

In Mississippi, Director Andrew Ward leads the Child Evangelism Fellowship. He can be reached at cefdirector@gmail.com or by telephone at (601) 573-2850.

Within the CEF, there are many opportunities to reach out to boys and girls by way of Good News Clubs through the commitment of a church to adopt a school. If you or your church might be interested in spreading the gospel to children by being part of starting a Good News Club within a school, contact Andrew. Visit their website at www.cefofmississippi.com. And for more information about the Child Evangelism Fellowship and to learn more about the ministry opportunities within the CEF, visit their main website www.cefonline.com or call the US Ministries and Ministry Opportunities at (800) 300-4033. Y Kimberly Grace Bowman resides in Florence, Mississippi, and is a junior in high school through A Beka Academy homeschooling.

Contact her at kimberlygraceb@gmail.com.

➺sports victories

by ROBERT WILSON

KEITH WILLIAMS Madison Central’s Own Michael Oher Story eith Williams gave high school football fans plenty of excitement on Friday nights this fall when he became as a key player on Madison Central’s football team. The senior wide receiver set a school record for receiving yards and helped the Jaguars to the Class 6A semifinals. He is recognized as one of best receivers in Mississippi.

But more importantly, Williams is making an eternal difference by telling students about Jesus Christ on Friday mornings in his role as the president of Madison Central’s chapter of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes.

“I take my role very seriously because I am in position to change lives through FCA,” Williams said. “We started off the year without many students coming to FCA, but I am proud to say that we have more than 100 coming now. It’s great. We have guest speakers, divide into small groups, give devotions, and hopefully give encouragement to the ones who come and show them that Christ loves them all the time. I have students who come to our meetings who will stop me in the hall and talk about their problems with me and get advice. It’s a great honor to hold this position.”

Williams’ journey is definitely an interesting one. Similar to the book and movie The Blind Side—about Michael Oher being adopted by a family and his success story at Ole Miss and now the NFL—Williams was adopted by Michelle and Tim Ellison six years ago when Williams was in middle school.

Williams grew up in West Jackson and became involved in Calvary Baptist Church through Minister of Missions Linda Smith.

“I met Keith when he was about four,” Smith said. “You can imagine Keith’s smile on a four year old. He was this beautiful kid with this great personality that made it easy to fall in love with him. As a kid, he loved to do front and back flips. He could do them one after another all the way down the street. He was so athletic even as a kid. The area that he grew up in was just rough.”

The Ellisons became close to Williams when Tim coached him in the Metro Jackson church basketball league when Williams was in elementary school.

Williams accepted Christ, was baptized and joined Calvary when he was 12 years old.

“We fell in love with him,” Michelle said. “And he latched onto us. Tim believed it was crucial to get him out of the situation he was in or he would be a possible dropout at some point. We saw a lot of potential in Keith even at a young age. We asked God to show us a way if He wanted us to take Keith out of the situation he was in.”

God did. Keith’s mother (Barbara Bailey) agreed to allow the Ellisons to adopt him. Williams still has a close relationship with his mother.

“Keith wanted to live with Ellisons and by God’s grace and some friend’s legal help, the Ellisons and Keith became a family,” Smith said. “It took courage on both of their

K

48 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

parts. Keith left everything he had ever known. The Ellisons became parents of a teenager. They are an amazing family. They have a deep love and respect for each other. And they have a lot of fun. They are gifts to each other. I am so proud of the man that Keith has become. He is kind, thoughtful, respectful, and happy. He has accomplished many great things on the football field. However, his great accomplishment is his passion to live out his faith in Jesus in the classroom, on the football field, and with his friends.”

Michelle and Smith’s relationship spans more than three decades.

Smith was Michelle’s youth minister when she was a senior in high school at First Baptist Church in Summit. They’ve been close ever since.

Michelle became involved in Calvary’s community missions program called HIS Heart in 1998. Michelle met Tim in 2004 and Smith married them in 2005. Michelle didn’t have any children and Tim’s were adults.

Williams was legally adopted by the Ellisons in the fall of his seventh grade year, near his 13th birthday. The Ellisons and Williams moved to

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Michelle Ellison, Keith Williams, and Tim Ellison

Madison after his eighth grade year and he attended Rosa Scott and now Madison Central. Tim coaches cross country and track and field at Madison Central and teaches eighth grade English at Madison Middle School. The Ellisons and Williams are now members of Broadmoor Baptist Church in Madison.

“Keith is a wonderful child,” Madison Central football coach Bobby Hall said. “He played a great year for us, but the story isn’t about Keith Williams the football player, it is about Keith Williams the person. He is a tremendous person and a devout Christian. He doesn’t force his faith on you, but he isn’t ashamed of it either. I have met very few people in my life who never have a bad day. Keith is of them. He always has a smile on his face.”

Williams isn’t sure about his college choice yet, but he knows one thing. “I want to be involved in the FCA wherever I go,” Williams said. “I want to tell people about Christ and what He has done for me.

“Keith wants to play college football and become a policeman,” Smith said. “I am prayerful those dreams can come true. I am confident that whatever path God lays down before Keith that God will use him in a great way to impact the Kingdom. It has been a great joy to witness his life unfold into a godly young man that will impact the world.”Y Robert Wilson is Business Developer for BFAC . He is a freelance writer, author, and the publisher of Victories in Metro Jackson magazine. He is a member of Broadmoor Baptist Church. Contact him at Robert@bfac.com.

French Camp Academy— serving young people and families for the glory of God Now accepting applications for deserving young people in grades 1–12.

One Fine Place • French Camp, Mississippi 39745

w w w. f re n c h c a m p . o r g • 6 6 2 - 5 4 7 - 6 4 8 2 metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 49

➺think tank

by ANDY WIMBERLY

Reaching Your FULL Potential

J

ohn Maxwell says, “Identify your mountain, your purpose in life, so that the work (or play) you do is meaningful. I meet people every day who are basically climbing the wrong mountain. People have spent 20

years of their life doing something that has no deep purpose for them and they suddenly look back and say, ‘What have I been doing?’ They’ve been working on something that has no deep purpose for them and something they are not passionate about.” Sound familiar?

I was introduced, by my friend and Butler Snow Advisory associate Martin Willoughby, to a new word last month: Arête, an ancient Greek word that means the fulfillment of one’s purpose or the act of living up to one’s full potential.

This got my thinker thinking. What is our full potential? And once we know what our full potential is, how do we go about moving towards it and reaching it? Why don’t more people even attempt this journey? A word of caution about my thinker—it doesn’t think like most folks do, and keep in mind that I was in the half of my class in school that made the top half possible.

A persons full potential always starts by working in their Sweet Spot, their Unique Ability, their Zone. I’ve found that when a person performs in their sweet spot for even a brief period of time, the following breakthroughs often appear: 1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

They know they have superior skills in this area; Their work is rejuvenating, creates energy, and is not tiring; They are always improving; They are passionate; Soon it attracts others just to watch them do what they do.

Test the jobs, projects, positions you are currently in against these five measurements.

Whether you are a doctor, farmer, entertainer, truck driver, preacher, bookkeeper, housewife, or schoolteacher. If you’ve been in the workforce for 30 years or 30 days, test yourself against these breakthroughs. Stop reading this article and DO IT NOW! Do it honestly and openly (no one will know how you did but you). How did you do? Are you close to your Sweet Spot?

Once you find your Sweet Spot, you are about to begin a most delightful journey—the road to your FULL POTENTIAL (Arête). The trip will be exciting, eventful and sometimes a bit challenging, but well worth the effort and time. It won’t happen overnight and remember, “this

50 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

journey to your full potential is about progress, not perfection.”

Obviously reaching your full potential sounds wonderful. Then why don’t more people try to reach their potential? I think there are four main reasons: 1. They’ve never thought about reaching their potential—they are too busy; 2. They think they don’t have the time—they are too busy; 3. They have no clarity, vision, or direction on how to even start—they are too busy; 4. They don’t know their sweet spot—they are too busy climbing the wrong mountain.

We are all too busy, don’t you think? What can we do to refocus, get some direction, clarity, and vision for our life that will at the very least head us toward the path of reaching our full potential.

Here’s your homework until the next article: Set the alarm clock just 30 minutes earlier, grab your coffee, get in a room by yourself, and just RELAX. Take a few deep breaths and think about what gives you energy, pleasure, and passion. Focus on jobs, projects, and activities that you just love to do. Then think how that passion could help other people. Focus on usefulness. Think about how you can help people and really bring value to the world!

Good luck on identifying your mountain and starting on your path of reaching your full potential (Arête). Call or email me if you get stuck in a rut and we’ll get unstuck together. Y Wimberly & Associates are executive coaches and financial advisors that use THE DISCOVERY PROCESS™ to help individuals and businesses reach their full potential. beth@thediscoveryprocess.com

what’s going on

“For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” (Mark 8:36).

W

hile you are mulling over all the ways you resolve to clean up, simplify, and vastly improve yourself in 2013, put spiritual nurture at the top of your list. Join a Bible study.

It is a great place to deepen your relationship with others and with God, and an amazing way to live with joy in the middle of these uncertain times. We did a little research and thought we would mention a few we know about.

■ Explorers Bible Study is an in-depth curriculum that meets for lecture and group discussion. A group made up of men and women meet on Tuesday nights at 7:00 p.m. at Riverwood Bible Church at 5228 Old Canton Road in Jackson. The group is studying the book of Romans. Contact Kathy Hays at 601.362.2693 for details. This is a great choice for couples!

■ MOMS is a ministry of Jackson’s First Presbyterian Church and is open to moms of children, sixth grade and under. Beginning January 16, their topic will be “Treasuring God’s Word.” What’s the big story of the Bible? How do all the pieces fit together? The study will focus on how God reveals himself, his plan for the world, and his will for his people in the Bible. They will also look at principles of Bible interpretation and how to use the whole story of the Bible to share the gospel with others. MOMS meets from 9-11 a.m. on Wednesday mornings. There is a $10 registration fee. To register, please call Laura at 601.366.3073 beginning January 1. There is limited nursery care available.

■ Explorer’s Day Group began meeting in 1978. They meet on Wednesday mornings at 9:30 a.m. at Christ United Methodist Church at 6000 Old Canton Road in Jackson. They will begin a new series called “Making Sure of the Truth” on January 23—studying the Minor Prophets and Philemon, Jude, Colossians, 1 and 2 Peter and the three letters of John. The format is lecture and small group discussion. Contact Martha Holt at 601.956.1052.

■ Riverwood Bible Church at 5228 Old Canton Road hosts a weekly Wednesday morning bible study led by Grace Bible Church pastor, John Ward. The study resumes January 9 and the study is Romans. The time is 10-11 a.m.

■ Riverwood also hosts a Thursday evening study led by Grace Bible Church pastor, John Ward. The new study begins January 10, 6-7 p.m. and will be an Old Testament survey course.

■ The Ridgeland Recreational Center is located at Old Trace Park right off Post Road in Ridgeland, and Mr. Bob Shirley, a seasoned student of scripture, leads a weekly men’s bible study on Tuesday’s from 9-10:30 a.m. The group resumes on January 8 and will be in the 11th chapter of John’s gospel. Mr. Shirley can be reached at 601.856.6761.

■ Ladies Thursday Group is a multi-denominational group that meets at Christ United Methodist church on Thursday afternoons from 1-3 p.m. Beginning January 10, they will begin Beth Moore’s Beloved Disciple, The Life and Ministry of John. The format is small-group discussion and DVD lecture. Contact marilyn@metrochristianliving.com for more information.

■ Gulf Coast Blessings is now a non-profit organization and ministry that began with a small ladies Bible Study around a kitchen table in 2007. They now meet in their own Blessing Place on Intraplex Parkway in Gulfport with a morning group from 9 a.m. to 11 a.m. on Monday’s and a night group on Monday’s from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. Many ages and stages of life are represented and regulars come from the entire South Mississippi, Alabama, and Louisiana region. Currently working through an original study on the Letters of John, you can find more information on their website at www.gulfcoastblessings.org.

■ Broadmoor Baptist Church offers several unique and exciting opportunities for women of all ages to plug-in and experience real spiritual growth. Broadmoor is located at 1531 Highland Colony Pkwy in Madison. Offering classes on Wednesday evenings from 6-7 p.m. and Thursday mornings from 9-11 a.m.

Upcoming studies include James: Mercy Triumphs by Beth Moore starting January 16 and Nehemiah by Kelly Minter beginning January 24. For a complete listing of classes and times for women, men, and couples, visit www.broadmoor.org or call 601.898.2345.

Y metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 51

MID-SOUTH Men’s RALLY

âžşrave reviews

First Presbyterian Church, Jackson

FRIDAY, JANUARY 25, 2013

BOOK

MUSIC

The REVEREND DR. W. Wilson Benton, JR.

Fixing My Eyes on Jesus Reviewed by Susan E. Richardson

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1390 North State Street Jackson, Mississippi 39202 (601) 353-8316 shannonc@fpcjackson.org

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52 JANUARY 2013 â?&#x2DC; Metro Christian Living

When a new year begins, many people look for a new devotional book to guide their daily quiet time. Publishers anticipate this need by releasing new titles along with old favorites.

Among this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s releases is Fixing My Eyes on Jesus, a year long devotional from Anne Graham Lotz.

Anyone who has heard Lotz speak or read one of her books knows that she is passionate about calling Christians into a deeper relationship with God through His word. In Fixing My Eyes on Jesus, she has designed each reading to combine with Scripture to help the reader focus on Jesus before the busyness of every day life gets in the way.

Readings are deceptively short.

These carefully chosen pieces from the best of Lotzâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s previous work pack an amazing amount of thought into a brief space. You will want to give yourself time to ponder and allow Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Spirit to speak to you after each entry.

Anyone struggling to combine a time-challenged schedule with material that offers depth of meaning will appreciate this book. Get your focus set, take the point from your reading, and begin your day refreshed. Yet a reader with plenty of time will find it equally valuable, and may want to follow up with journaling. Whether readings encourage, challenge, or inspire, Fixing My Eyes on Jesus provides rich food for daily reflection.

Y

Susan E. Richardson is a writer, critique reader, and former Christian retailer with a passion for meeting peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s needs through the written word. You can reach her through her website www.nextlevelcritiques.com.

Abide by Ben Ford Written by Kate Boudreaux of The Collective

Unfazed by the weight of his own talent and influence, singer/songwriter Ben Ford is about as down-to-earth as they come. Mississippi born and raised, his heart and music are free from pretense and hypocrisy, and grounded in the truth of the Gospel and the wonder of grace. Fordâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s versatile, soulful voice rises and falls with emotion, telling stories of celebration and longing, ringing out with tenderness and strength, seeming to carry years of history hidden beneath every breath. His insightful songwriting evokes an almost visceral response from the listener, as illustrated in â&#x20AC;&#x153;I Am Redeemed,â&#x20AC;? a song that addresses the paradox of Christâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s servant leadership with the lyrics â&#x20AC;&#x153;Still Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re the King, and You wash my feet.â&#x20AC;? As an artist, Ben Ford holds greatness in his handsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;hands that craft beauty and coax music from the strings of a guitar. But following in the footsteps of Christ, he leads by example, not seeking greatness or glory for himself, but desiring to serve the Lord and others through music, hoping that his songs can be used by God to encourage, to uplift, and in essence, to wash someoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s feet.

You can also see more of Ben Ford at North Ridge Church in Ridgeland every Sunday. Listen to Benâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new EP/ Abide on iTunes. Y

➺

events calendar

JANUARY 2013

JACKSON January 5 Mississippi Blues Marathon and Half Marathon, a USA Track and Field certified event, is coming to Jackson and welcoming runners throughout the region. Put on your running shoes or cheer for the runners as they wind throughout Downtown Jackson. For additional information, visit www.msbluesmarathon.com.

pencil drawings from this extraordinary artist. For additional information, call the library at 601-825-2672.

January 18 Mississippi’s own B.B. King is coming to Thalia Mara Hall with show time beginning at 7:30 p.m. Jam out to the Blues from one of the top Blues artists in the nation. Tickets start at $35 and can be purchased through Ticketmaster.com

January 18-19 Belhaven University’s Arts Ablaze will be presenting Little Opera for Children: The Pied Piper of Hamelin by Seymour Barab at their Concert Hall on Riverside Drive. Bring the entire family to this clever oneact classic.

Complimentary admission, with doors opening 30 minutes prior to show time. Call 601-965-7026 for show times.

BRANDON January 1-31 The Brandon Public Library and the Friends of the Brandon Library will be hosting The World of Walter Anderson Art Exhibit during regular library hours.

The exhibit includes watercolors and

FLOWOOD January 18 Praise 18, a non-profit organization to raise community awareness about organ and tissue donation, will host a charity event at Crossgates Baptist Church beginning at 7:00 p.m. Enjoy performances by Finding Favour and Shelly E. Johnson while supporting a great cause. Tickets are $10, and children 10 and under are free. Tickets may be purchased online at www.crossgates.org or at the door the night of the event.

RIDGELAND Every Friday Have fun learning to Paint with Pastels with instructor Cecilia Baker every Friday morning from 9:30 a.m. - noon. This class is open to all levels from beginner to advanced and will be located at Old Trace Park. Cost is $65 per month. For additional information, call Linda at 601-856-6876.

metrochristianliving.com ❘ JANUARY 2013 53

➺quips & quotes

ADVERTISING INDEX

}

{

Cut out the scriptures and quotes and place them around your home for daily encouragement!

✂

ADVERTISER

PAGE

Anjou Restaurant ......................................................23 Belhaven University ....................................................5 Blue Cross Blue Shield of MS .................................11 Boy Scouts of America ............................................21

“Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.”

“I love the Lord, because he hath heard my voice and my supplications.”

– Anonymous

– Psalm 116:1

Broadmoor Baptist Church .....................................27 Callaway's Yard & Garden .......................................12 C Spire ........................................................................3 Christ Covenant .......................................................23 Choose Life .................................................................2 CMMC ......................................................................56 Covenant Caregivers ................................................15

“People nowadays take time far more seriously than eternity.”

– Thomas Kelly

“People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas.”

– Anonymous

He who testifies to these things says,“Yes, I am coming soon.” Amen.

Come, Lord Jesus.

– Revelation 22:20

DORE program .........................................................53 Energy Insulation.......................................................50 EyeCare Professionals...............................................11 First Presbyterian Day School .................................18 French Camp Academy ..........................................49 Gameroom Gallery ..................................................25 Gentiva Hospice .......................................................37 Grantham Poole Certified Public Accountants .....49

“Lost wealth may be replaced by industry, lost knowledge by study, lost health by temperance, but lost time is gone forever.”

– Samuel Smiles

Highland Village .......................................................23 Jackson Academy ......................................................2 Jackson Heart ...........................................................18 Jackson Preparatory School ....................................27 Joel Clarke & Sons Jewelry......................................39

“The Lord has promised good to me...

His word my hope secures.

He will my shield and portion be as long as life endures.”

– Hymn: “Amazing Grace” by John Newton

“The LORD is righteous in all his ways and faithful in all he does.

The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.”

– Psalms 146:17-18

“Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.”

- Genesis 2:3

King's Daughters Hospital ......................................39 Lake Forest Ranch.....................................................18 Law Firm of William B. Howell.................................43 L.D. O'Mire Financial Services .................................52 N. State Animal Hospital..........................................54 Novella ......................................................................39 Persnickety ................................................................17 Pennington & Trim Alarm Services, Inc...................12 Private Collection......................................................37 The Center for Marriage & Family Therapy ...........45 Sitters, LLC ...............................................................18 Southern Farm Bureau Life Insurance Company....27 Sta-Home Health & Hospice....................................21 Stegall Imagery .........................................................55 Summit Counseling .................................................39 Sunnybrook Estates .................................................39 Tears Water the Seeds of Hope ................................4 The Club at the Township .........................................7 The Veritas School ...................................................33

NORTH STATE ANIMAL & BIRD HOSPITAL 5208 North State Street • Jackson, MS 39206

601-982-8261

The Waterford ..........................................................27 Tinnin Imports ............................................................9 Venable Glass Services ............................................45

Dr. Adrian Whittington Dr. Jeb Cade Dr. Melissa McLendon

WHJT Star 93.5.........................................................55

OFFICE HOURS: Monday-Friday: 7:30 am - 6:00 pm Saturday: 8:00 am - 12:00 pm Sunday: Boarding only 5:00 pm - 6:00 pm

Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home .........................23

Boarding & Grooming Services Available

54 JANUARY 2013 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Woodridge Capital Portfolio Management ...........35 Written in Stone .......................................................39

Best Wishes for a Blessed and Prosperous New Year!

www.star93fm.com

metrochristianliving.com â?&#x2DC; JANUARY 2013 55