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THE MEN’S ISSUE
Johnny & Stacey
Donaldson From the farm to the board room
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contents JUNE 2021 VOLUME 15, NUMBER 12 PUBLISHER
MS Christian Living, Inc. EDITOR
Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com MANAGING EDITOR
STEGALL IMAGERY
Suzanne Durfey
South Mississippi natives Johnny and Stacey Donaldson have come a long way — and they give all the glory to “He who is within them.” See page 16.
ART/GRAPHIC DESIGN
Sandra Goff SALES
Suzanne Durfey, Ginger Gober CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
Libbo Crosswhite, Chris Fields, Dan Hall, Branden Henry, Laura Lee Leathers, Geralyn Warfield COVER PHOTOGRAPHY
columns 8 Mission Mississippi Moments Honoring one another Haiti was home for this family for 13 years. Now they’re on mission in the Magnolia State! See page 24.
10 Modern Motherhood
DISTRIBUTION ASSISTANTS
Michelle and Randy Fortenberry, Rachel and Nettie Schulte, Jerri Strickland, Bob and Rachel Whatley
Hope for the grieving on Father’s Day
12 Health & Wellness
cover story
Only God can create, heal, restore
Mississippi Christian Living 601.790.9076 mschristianliving.com
14 As I See It
16 Johnny & Stacey
Neanderthals? Maybe… But cut us some slack
Donaldson
15 Let’s Talk It Over
From the farm to the board room
An open letter to the heart of men
feature
29 Food for Thought Recipes approved by Dad
24 Matt and Stacey Ayars How God brought them from Haiti to Mississippi
30 This Is My Story How I made it through my unplanned pregnancy
32 A Cup of Encouragement Lessons from Dad’s toolbox
in every issue
Coming Next Month Veteran/minister Bubba Holifield and his wife — a life of love and sacrifice
6 31 34 34
Editor’s Letter The Roman Road Quips & Quotes Advertiser Index
CONNECT WITH US: facebook.com/MSChristianLiving 4 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
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Mississippi Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Mississippi Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Mississippi Christian Living staff to ensure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2021 by MS Christian Living, Inc. Mississippi Christian Living is published monthly and is available for free at hightraffic locations throughout the tri-county area. Subscriptions are $29 a year. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Mississippi Christian Living, 115 Kristen Cove Madison, MS 39110.
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EDITOR’S LETTER
STEGALL IMAGERY
What ‘song’ is stuck in your head?
Interviewing Johnny and Stacey Donaldson for our cover story.
I
’ve written before about how God spoke to me during my senior year of college, when I was questioning everything about Christianity. He spoke through the Bible and through trusted believers. He also used music, and not just KLOVE. For instance, on Christmas Day that year, my brother turned on “Wild Horses” by The Rolling Stones. The second verse says, “Graceless lady, you know who I am / You know I can’t let you slide through my hand,” followed by the chorus: “Wild horses couldn’t drag me away / Wild, wild horses couldn’t drag me away.” To be clear, Mick Jagger and Keith Richards were not writing this song as God speaking to a fearful young woman. But God used the lyrics above to speak directly to my heart. I only wish they’d stayed stuck in my head for the next five months. Has a song ever impacted you like that? Or, do you have one playing on loop in your mind right now? Maybe not even a meaningful one, but an earworm that won’t go away? Just as a song gets stuck in your head, assumptions about reality can often lodge themselves in our brains without our permission. Not all of these assumptions are true or pleasant. For instance:
● I’ll never get caught up on everything I need to do. ● I’m a terrible parent.
● Today is shot, so there’s no point in trying to make it better. We might not verbalize these statements, but 6 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Happy Father’s Day to my dad, who has a habit of pointing me to good songs!
how often do we believe them? How often does our mind just let a song in, without realizing it’s a funeral dirge? In order to get rid of the false and unhelpful “songs” in our heads, we’ve got to learn better songs, and repeat them till they start playing by default. But how do we do that? The short answer is, get to know God through His Word, prayer, and Christian community. Maybe you’re already doing those things but could use more specific help. I have two recommendations: 1) Read Ginny Owens’ new book, “Singing in the Dark.” 2) Come to our Fear to Faith Women’s Retreat on Saturday, Oct. 30, and hear Ginny speak and sing in person!
If you read our Author Q&A with Ginny last month, you know she grew up in Jackson and is a Christian singer-songwriter, as well as an author and speaker. Blind since age 3, she attended both Murrah High School and the Mississippi School for the Blind. But Ginny’s book isn’t just about physical blindness. Instead, the book takes us on a tour of different songs, prayers and laments from the Bible, and shows us how biblical people “sang” to God in seasons of spiritual and emotional darkness. As I prepared to interview Ginny about the book, I looked at her website and noticed a list of topics she often speaks about. One of the topics was “Love Be the Loudest — Hearing God’s Voice Above the Noise.” This was exactly what I wanted us to learn about at our next women’s retreat, and I still needed a keynote speaker and worship leader. Thank You, God! More details about the retreat will be forthcoming, but ladies, go ahead and save the date for Saturday, Oct. 30! In the meantime, check out Ginny’s book, and above all, seek God in His Word and in prayer. Try memorizing verses that remind you of heavenly realities so you can fix your eyes on Christ and not your circumstances. Here’s a verse I read yesterday and need to memorize (broken up to emphasize how POWERFUL each phrase is!): “But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name, thou art mine.” - Isaiah 43:1, KJV. I hope Mississippi Christian Living also gives you positive “songs” on which to meditate. Here are some I’m excited about: ● Johnny and Stacey Donaldson went from plastic dining room furniture to visiting the Rose Garden — and they give God all the glory. (page 16) ● Yes, God can use your grief. (page 10)
● God brought Matt and Stacey Ayars from Haiti to Mississippi, and they’re still on mission. (page 24) Y
Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com
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MISSION MISSISSIPPI MOMENTS
by GERALYN WARFIELD
Honoring one another
M
ore than in many places, Mississippians often easily connect with one another. We may unite over
Since being involved with Mission Mississippi, I have been empowered to focus even more on others, particularly on brothers and crawfish, football or other sports. School functions. Where sisters who are homeless. I work to take time to have honest, heartfelt our families are from. interactions, listening to their stories and thoughts as I meet them on While it is important to nurture these relationships, Christians are the street. I’ve heard God’s voice in my heart and shared coffee or meals called to more. Not only do we nurture relationships with those who with a few individuals. Getting to know someone’s name and story can share our interests, but God also be a powerful way to honor them calls us to put our faith in action and be a light in the world. and reach out to those we do not These interactions are an know. To those with whom we We may unite over crawfish, football or extension of my intention to make disagree. And to those around the day better for every individual other sports. School functions. Where our whom we might be (if we’re with whom I interact — to honor families are from. … but God also calls us to honest) a bit nervous. others as we are called to do in the Jesus inspires us to be a beacon, put our faith in action and reach out to those gospel. I’m the stranger who smiles to “love one another with mutual at you as we pass along the street, we do not know. To those with whom we affection; anticipate one another in and I could even say hello. I am also disagree. And to those around whom we might the person who offers aid if you showing honor” (Romans 12:10, New American Bible, Revised drop something, stumble, or have be (if we’re honest) a bit nervous. Edition). For nearly three decades, been in an accident. And I am that Mission Mississippi has led the way person who will pray for both the in providing opportunities to go beyond the secular and take action that first responders and those in need when I hear a siren (thanks to my connects us in meaningful ways. We can find common ground with mom for sharing that gem). anyone, although the search might take some effort. Thanks to the God calls us to expand beyond cursory relationships and love presence of God in our lives, we can relate — in ways small and large — everyone. Is it easy? Not always. But every time, His grace allows us to to others and honor them by putting their needs before our own. It is be successful in putting our faith into action, to honor others no matter not just in marriage vows that the word “honor” holds significant their background and circumstance. meaning, but in our everyday actions. It is thanks to Mission Mississippi that I continue to be blessed with The folks I’ve met through Mission Mississippi are inspirational in opportunities to listen and learn alongside incredible people. how they honor others. From the very first Mission Mississippi prayer #HonoringOneAnother Y breakfast I attended in 2011, I was made to feel welcome, and was inspired by the sense of community among people who otherwise might Geralyn Warfield was a member of the Mission Mississippi prayer not have connected with one another. They were intentional, gracecommittee before moving out of state. She and her husband live in filled, open, and willing to share even difficult conversations. They Lincoln, Nebraska. They have one daughter and two exemplified JOY: focusing first on Jesus, then Others, and finally grandchildren. themselves (You). What a countercultural idea!
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'PS BEEJUJPOBM JOGP PO VQDPNJOH FWFOUT WJTJU NJTTJPONJTTJTTJQQJ PSH PS DBMM mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 9
MODERN MOTHERHOOD
by LIBBO CROSSWHITE
Hope for the grieving on Father’s Day
T
he older I get, the more I value learning about the character of Christ. The snippets of Him
throughout the Old Testament prophecies, and New Testament eye-witness accounts, give us a real sense of both God’s power and His human form. Perhaps my favorite in the last few years has been His ability to connect with others via the stories He told, all of which pointed to our greatest need: Him. Paul David Tripp writes that, “In love, God lets pieces of creation die in our hands so that increasingly we are freed from asking earth to give us what only He can give. He works through loss to protect us from giving our allegiance to things that will never, ever deliver what our hearts seek. We learn to give our hearts to full devotion and worship of Him.” Part of what we’re called to do here on Earth is tell our stories, the good and the bad, that hopefully point to our need and reliance on a Savior. I can personally attest that those who know great grief have a story to tell. I met a student this past semester in my leadership class at Mississippi College who shared a story similar to mine: Her dad lost his battle with cancer far too soon. A bright young woman of God, Raley Holman was a joy to teach. One of the assignments I give students in the leadership class is to write a paper on someone who has personally influenced their life. The second part of the assignment is to give that person the paper. As I read Raley’s personal account of her dad’s influence in her
and many others’ lives, part of my heart broke knowing that Raley wanted nothing more than to be able to complete the second part of the assignment. It has become increasingly clear that God wants this space to be used for the stories He has written in my life and others’ lives, so I asked Raley for permission to introduce you to Ron Holman, a man of God, a warrior until the very end, and perhaps most precious to Raley, a father. Raley writes: “Growing up with Ron Holman as my dad was equivalent to being too close to a masterpiece of a painting (so) I was not able to appreciate (its) beauty entirely. The same guy that developed leaders in staff meeting on Tuesdays, preached from the pulpit on Sundays, traveled to help develop and serve other ministries all throughout the year, and the plethora of other titles he juggled was the same guy who never missed a Thursday night softball game, laughed with my family at the dinner table, and always prayed over me before bed every night. I never realized how many places he managed to be at one time yet also was able (to) maintain full devotion to every area he touched, especially home life. A good leader can be defined by several varying attributes but a great leader is defined by someone who understands their life is not about themselves and leads others to the One it is about through their actions and my dad is, to this day, the best example of a great leader I have ever seen. There are an infinite number of
reasons my dad was and still is the best leader I have ever known. Not only because of how he loved and (led) my family but because of how he loved and humbly (led) every person he ever met. It has been almost four years and people still feel the loss of him no longer being here but because of how he lived, his life is still changing other people and I believe will for generations to come.” Max Muller said, “I know well there is no comfort for the pain of parting; the wound always remains, but one learns to bear the pain, and learns to thank God for what He gave, for the beautiful memories of the past, and the yet more beautiful HOPE for the future.” I haven’t met Ron Holman yet. But I have hope that one day we will meet as believers in a God who restores all earthly grief for eternal joy. For many, this month brings the joy of celebrating fathers and maybe also the heartache of longing for a person gone too soon. Tell your stories, share your fatherhood journey, and above all, know there is hope in Christ that restores each of us. Y
Libbo Haskins Crosswhite and her husband, Clay, live in Madison and attend Pinelake. They have one daughter, Mary Thomas, who is 7 years old, and a son, Russell, who is 5 years old. She is the high school guidance counselor at Madison-Ridgeland Academy and can be emailed at lcrosswhite@mrapats.org.
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HEALTH & WELLNESS
by CHRIS FIELDS
Only God can create, heal, restore
“I
n the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” Genesis chapters 1 and 2 are the only true accounts of
the Creator meant for us to discover. We forget to see the Creator in the discovery. We forget to see His goodness and His love and His mercy on display in the discovery. creating everything ever created, and it was done by the Creator, This last year introduced us to a deadly virus that was new to the God. Everything since then has just been a discovery of what God created. general public but known to those who had studied it and its effects. Musicians have discovered how to put sounds together harmoniously Before the latter part of 2019, only those who studied the coronavirus and melodically. Artists have discovered how to translate images onto knew of its existence. What they didn’t know was canvases. Inventors figure out how to take one how deadly it would be when introduced to the preexistent substance and put it with another world, but God knew. preexistent substance, thus discovering Genesis chapters 1 and 2 are With the introduction of COVID-19 came one something totally new to humankind. Scientists the only true accounts of of the more remarkable achievements of medical do the same, discovering but never creating, while another comes along and finds flaws in (creation), and it was done by the science in discovering an immune response against the virus, which enabled the development the initial discovery, thus making the discovery Creator, God. Everything since and testing of an effective vaccine for COVID in better — and the cycle continues. then has just been a discovery less than 12 months. (The next-fastest vaccine What’s unrealized is that it’s all just a development was the vaccination for the mumps, of what God created. discovery of something already known by the which took four years.) all-knowing God. The Bible tells us in What makes this even more remarkable was Ecclesiastes 1:9, “There is nothing new under the that science could never grasp the pathology of COVID-19 or its symptoms. sun. What has been will be again and what’s been done will be done again.” They couldn’t discover or predict who was going to be affected, how they Creation accounted for everything. God gave us everything we need to were going to be affected, or how they would recover, so everybody went be successful and excel. Our purpose is to maximize what’s already been on lockdown. But they discovered a vaccine faster than any other in the created, and we’ve done that exceptionally, Christians and heathens alike. history of humanity. Imagine that! If this doesn’t sound like God, I don’t But it seems in all our discovering, we forget we are only discovering what know what does. For all of a year, I had to listen as Christians prayed and pled for relief and deliverance from the effects of COVID-19, and now that relief has come, Christians are reluctant to accept it. I had to sit and listen to Christians pray for a return to normalcy and life pre-pandemic, and when the answer came, they rejected it. It’s no surprise, though, because the Bible is full of examples of how the Israelites prayed the same prayers of deliverance and providence, only to reject the answer when it came. Funny thing is, the main instance of answered prayers for deliverance and providence came in the form of Jesus, God Himself in the flesh, and Jews are still rejecting it to this day. So it’s no surprise that a lot of Christians today don’t see the miracle in the COVID19 vaccination. They don’t see God’s providential hand moving and healing the nation. They don’t see His restoration power restoring and replenishing what’s been stolen. I hear Christians day after day talk about how they aren’t going to get vaccinated and why, citing God as their source of reason and quoting Bible verses to justify their reasons, and I think, “Do you even know God?” The God I know heals, restores and provides. The God I know makes the discovery of His creation available to His created as they need it for their benefit. Not to be divisive but to display His goodness, grace and mercy. To display His wisdom and power and to display His love. So if you haven’t been vaccinated and you are citing God as your reasoning for not being vaccinated, stop. Only He can create, heal and restore. Humanity can only discover it. Y
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”
Chris Fields is the founder and executive director of H.E.A.L. Mississippi and a graduate in kinesiology with advance studies in nutrition. He serves as a clinical exercise physiologist/CPT and is credentialed in Exercise Is Medicine through American College of Sports Medicine. 12 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
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AS I SEE IT
by DAN HALL
Neanderthals? Maybe… But cut us some slack
A
llow me to thumb my nose at political correctness and simply state: Men and women are different. Harvard clinical psychologist William Pollack demonstrates this in his book “Real Boys.” Referencing horrifying statistics such as dropouts, juvenile crime, ADD diagnoses and alcohol/drug violations, Dr. Pollack goes into great detail on simply the biological differences and their implications. Dr. Pollack explains how a man’s brain has more white matter, with a longer, more complex nerve system head to toe, leading to greater gross motor skills. A woman’s brain has more gray matter, able to deal with the quicker acquisition of information, leading to better communication skills. Another study shows why men and women deal with conflict differently. The part of the man’s brain that deals with problem-solving is connected to his motor skills; the part of a woman’s brain that deals with problem-solving is connected to her communication. Simply put: When men want to solve a problem, they want to do something. When women want to solve a problem, they want to talk about it. Often, when I share this, I get knowing chuckles from women. But stick with me here. I use this principle whether I’m doing corporate training on conflict resolution, or personal relationship coaching. I see the light come on in many eyes.
It’s the age-old exasperation between a man and his wife. In all sincerity, he seeks to “solve the problem.” She throws her hands up, declaring, “I’m not asking you to solve it. I just wanted you to listen!” I’ve heard it in many sessions. Heck, I have lived it!
warn women that “I try toterrifying words to
the most a man are some combination of, ‘We have a problem. Would you please sit down so we can talk about it?’
”
So I try to warn women that the most terrifying words to a man are some combination of: “We have a problem. Would you please sit down so we can talk about it?” You literally have asked me to go against my natural, internal wiring. I’ve learned I talk better if we are doing something: walking, driving, painting a room or rearranging the closet. ANYTHING but making me sit and concentrate without my hands doing something. Yes, some men have learned this discipline. But why make it complicated?
Anna Mulrine wrote in “Boys: The Weaker Sex?” for U.S. News & World Report about the changes at Thomas Edison Elementary School in Joplin, Missouri. Third-grade teacher Denise Young allowed her boys to stand while doing classwork and play with stress balls when solving problems, which gave them more thinking time to process a question. Principal Debbie Murphy began dealing with boys sent to her by taking them for a walk around the playground rather than lecturing them in her office. The results were staggering: The school went from some of the lowest test grades in the state to the top 10, and experienced a 92 percent drop in ISS (in-school suspensions) in three years. Yes, when it comes to communication, men might occasionally act like Neanderthals, but we really do care what you think. We just hear you differently than you do. So if you have the grace for it, cut us some slack, and shoot some hoops with me so we can “talk about it.” Y
Dan Hall is an executive and strategic coach to leaders and executive teams. He also works with organizations on team building, conflict resolution and communication skills. He and his wife, Hazel, have six children and four grandchildren. You can reach him at Dan@OnCourseSolutions.com.
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14 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
LET’S TALK IT OVER
by BRANDEN HENRY
An open letter to the heart of men
W
hen was the last time you felt alive? And I mean really ALIVE.
Not just the excitement of buying a new thing, watching a great game or closing a big deal. But the kind of alive that gives you a new perspective on life, where nothing feels like it will ever be the same. On the other hand, how often do you feel dulled, like a knife that has lost its edge? Or even worse, numb? Not feeling much of anything, little to no sorrow to go along with a lack of passion. Maybe you are intentionally numbing with alcohol, pills, spending or sex, or maybe it’s the more insidious kind of numbing that comes by always being nice, dutiful and dispassionate. What if when Jesus said that He came to give you life to the fullest, He really meant it? What if His great design was that you live life fully alive, rather than merely managing it? The caricature of the American man is that he is stoic — needing only food, work and sex — and that he’s most pleased when life goes the way he’s planned. I would argue that this kind of life is a shadow of what could be. Most men that I know, be they 13, 38, or 83, are longing for more but are unsure how to find it. Often in the life of a joyless man, his marriage is dull, parenting is strained and friendships are thin. While he looks to work for adventure, his wife is left lonely and bored. And so these men start a second life that is parallel to the one they live in public. They show a life that’s nice, compliant and riskavoidant, all while their shadow life is full of resentment, escape and some kind of striving. Solomon writes about this in Ecclesiastes as he reflects on the vanity of toiling away at work, the weariness of striving to be satisfied, and the exhaustion that comes with endless achievement. He writes that he sought pleasure — through alcohol, sex, work, wealth, experiences, etc. — and he came up empty. Like trying to clutch smoke in his hands, it was never enough. He realized that no matter how much he learned or how hard he worked, the suffering in this life would not stop. Solomon seems to come to terms with this, to live life on life’s terms, as we say in 12-step rooms. He says community, the act of caring
for the poor while receiving in our own poverty, is critical to living with joy. Most of us reading this have a poverty that is often relational, emotional and spiritual, rather than material. Solomon ends his teaching by telling us to be awed by God and do what He tells us. Usually, becoming alive starts with being awakened to a reality greater than yourself. Years ago, my friend Bill Blair and I started leading men on summer adventure intensives in the Rockies. Bill developed a rhythm for these trips: Awake, Aware, Alive. What reality do you need to be Awakened to? Maybe you have lived numbed by addictive substances or behaviors, or maybe you have desensitized your life by ignoring your longings, avoiding risk, and isolating from community. What longing have you put on a shelf and tried to ignore? What are you not Aware of? It is impossible to become aware of yourself without honest, loving feedback from those around you. Maybe they cannot give you that feedback because of how walled-up, hidden, isolated and calloused you have become. How many people really know you: your fears, doubts, dreams and desires? Try to double that number. What makes you come Alive? This is a question you can only answer through lived experience with others. You will not live life to the fullest in isolation, without risk, and numb to reality. Joy can often be found in a community that is awed by their Creator, and for many of us that comes most naturally by spending time in His creation. My advice is this: Find some men to help you dig into these questions, or if you don’t know where to start, find a counselor to help you gain some traction. Go to a 12-step meeting or a small group at your church. Ask God to awaken and enliven you, and then pay attention to whom He sends your way. Y
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COVER STORY
by KATIE EUBANKS
‘He That Is Within Me’ As you read these words, my earnest prayer is that you will NOT see me, BUT, HE that is Within Me. For you see, HE that is Within Me, is Far Greater, than he that you see. Some people say the things we possess make the manner of a man. I beg the difference! For you see, I am convinced that he that you see can NEVER be Greater than HE that is Within Me. For you see, HE is my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
16 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
STEGALL IMAGERY
By Johnny Donaldson
Johnny & Stacey
DONALDSON From the farm to the board room This painting that hangs at BankPlus’ Jackson headquarters reminds Johnny of his farming roots in Prentiss, Mississippi.
T
here’s a painting at the Jackson headquarters of BankPlus that might take a trip down the hall by the time you read this.
If you visit Johnny Donaldson, the Jackson president at BankPlus, he’ll probably show you the painting, a landscape by Charlie Buckley that hangs in the “Lexington” conference room — or in Johnny’s office, if he heeds his instinct to move it there. He says the crop rows on the canvas capture his childhood in south Mississippi. “I would look at this view (growing up) and think, ‘Is this it?’” he recalls. Was farm life his only future? Apparently not. Now Johnny’s family watches as he’s photographed standing next to the painting, and he reminds his daughters: God is the one who brought him from the crop rows to the board room. mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 17
Johnny with Stacey, front, and two cousins before deploying to Desert Storm with the Army National Guard.
Johnny and Stacey during their college dating years.
Kris, the Donaldsons’ terrier mix. 18 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Altar calls and toy trailers Dr. Stacey Donaldson, director of Instructional Design at Belhaven University, grew up on another farm in the same county as Johnny, but she lived in Bassville and he lived in Prentiss. They wouldn’t meet until college. While Johnny and his family raised cattle and grew soybeans, watermelons and wheat, Stacey’s father was a lab analyst at GeorgiaPacific pulp and paper company. He raised pigs on the side. Stacey spent lots of time outdoors with her brothers, and on Sundays she could be found at church, where her father was a deacon. “Every Sunday, in the Missionary Baptist church, you go up to the altar at altar call. The pastor makes this plea to those who want to be saved,” she says. “One Sunday, I thought, ‘Yes, I do (want to be saved).’ But there was this disconnect. I kept doing it over and over. Eventually I realized, once you’re saved, you don’t have to keep going (down front).” Similarly, Johnny didn’t have “this earthshattering thing” happen in one specific moment, he says. He just knows he has trusted in Jesus for a long time. He recounts an early memory: “As a little kid, when I wasn’t old enough to work on the farm yet, I had a toy tractor,” he says. “Going to church, I heard them saying you could ask God for something and He’ll hear you. So I said, ‘God, can You give me a trailer
Johnny on the morning he left Mississippi for his Desert Storm deployment.
to go on the back of this tractor?’” God graciously met Johnny where he was at. He got that trailer. Pageants and pocket money When Stacey was in junior high, “a teacher saw something in me,” she recalls. “There was this silent part of me that wanted someone to see me.” Thanks to a certain Ms. Griffith, Stacey entered her first talent show, and later participated in pageants. “I hate the stage, but I hate the fear of the stage more,” she says. Meanwhile, by 14 years old, Johnny was supervising men who were decades older than him. “I was the tattletale,” he says. “My uncle would say, ‘If they don’t do (their job), come back and tell me.’” Johnny spent his summers “dusty from head to toe” while his friends were riding bikes or swimming. “I can’t tell you how many days I drove a tractor from sunup to sundown.” The plus side? He always had a little pocket money. And God was giving him the discipline he’d need when he finally left the farm. ‘Lord, am I making the right decision?’ After high school, Johnny joined the U.S. Army. “I remember praying, ‘Lord, am I making the right decision?’ There were academic scholarships I turned down,” he says, though
Johnny and Camaryn.
Stacey and Cailyn, the Donaldsons’ miracle baby.
Camaryn, who turns 23 this month, attended The University of Mississippi and Tougaloo College.
Cailyn, a graduate of Clinton High School, plans to attend The University of Southern Mississippi in the fall.
the Army would pay for his degree. Good thing he asked God, and not his drill sergeant, for assurance. At basic training, the sergeant wrote in Johnny’s book, “This one’s not going to make it.” The sergeant shared that prediction with Johnny later, and added, “You proved me wrong.” At Johnny’s permanent duty station at Ft.
Hood, Texas, another sergeant urged the men to go to church on Sunday mornings. “Uh, we’re off duty,” they’d say. “We don’t have to go with you.” “Oh, you’re going. And we’re going tonight. Bring your girlfriend with you.” Johnny and two of his friends attended church with the sergeant, and the trio are “still
like brothers today,” Johnny says. One of those friends, Brockston White, or Brock, was also a believer. “He would be reading his Bible as we’d be getting ready to go to the party,” Johnny says. “(He’d say) ‘Y’all both come in here.’ We’d have to read that chapter and talk about it before we left.” Even later, when Johnny was deployed mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 19
20 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
‘Ninja Turtles,’ tithing, and toilet-seat notes Johnny and Stacey both enrolled at The University of Southern Mississippi. She was a couple years younger and had just finished high school. “I knew we were from the same county,” Stacey says. “I was appalled because the first few times we’d pass on the sidewalk, he wouldn’t speak.” Finally, Johnny’s best friend introduced them at breakfast in the cafeteria. “Johnny looked at me like he’d never seen me before,” Stacey says. He couldn’t believe she was from Bassville. He thought he knew the girls from Bassville. The two were just friends at first. They were both gun-shy due to recent relationships. “Our first date was (to see the movie) ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,’” Johnny says. “I asked where she wanted to eat…” “I said, ‘McDonald’s is fine with me,’” Stacey says.
Later, Johnny heard a (false) rumor that another male student was trying to rub Stacey’s feet in class. He charged into the cafeteria to find the alleged culprit. “Then I realized, ‘Whoa, what is this? You’ve never been ready to fight over a girl before.’” After college, Stacey moved to Tupelo to continue a career in broadcast journalism. Johnny moved to Birmingham, and later Tampa, to start his banking career. They dated long-distance before eventually marrying and settling in Tampa. Like other newlyweds, the Donaldsons had to learn effective communication. “Early in our marriage, I had a hard time expressing myself verbally, so I had to write it out,” Stacey says. “Oh, yeah!” Johnny says, laughing as he remembers: “I’d wake up and there’d be a note on the toilet seat.” He’d take the letter to Stacey and ask, “What is this?”
PHOTOS BY STEGALL IMAGERY
during Desert Storm, “my tent-mate was a minister.” Johnny couldn’t get away from God. “Donaldson, we’re going to have devotion,” the tent-mate would say. “We’re in war!” “No, you and I are getting ready to pray.” Johnny’s feelings about the Army changed over time. While enduring a surprise training exercise in a cold, muddy foxhole at 2 a.m., he and Brock made a pact to “do something (else) with our lives,” he recalls. “It was storming, freezing … We almost had frostbite.” But after two years of active duty, Johnny cried as he drove from Texas back to Mississippi to attend college. Again, he asked God if he was making the right decision. “This was a career that I’d been in for two years, where I was thriving.” Again, God gave him assurance. He also gave him a wife.
“Did you read it?” The inevitable “no” made her even angrier. But Johnny would say, “Just tell me what you want me to know.” Eventually, she learned to talk through conflicts, and he learned that if she’d written him a note, he’d better read it. Also, Stacey got her husband, the banker, to tithe on their earnings. “Our first dining room set was plastic outdoor (furniture),” Johnny remembers. “We were sitting at that plastic table, and she said, ‘We’re going to pay our tithes.’” He was taken aback and tried to argue. “You don’t understand. (The money’s) not there.” He was paying bills at the time. Finally, he decided to trust his wife. As soon as Johnny wrote the tithe check, Stacey noticed the due date on one of the bills. Johnny thought it was due in a few days, but the date was still a couple weeks off. Since then, tithing hasn’t been a question. ‘You could abort if you like’ While pregnant with she and Johnny’s eldest daughter, Camaryn, Stacey started pondering the future. “I prayed, ‘I want (my career) to be what You have for me,’” she says. It turns out that meant teaching, which she started when Camaryn was 10 weeks old. As a rookie teacher, “it took me a good two weeks to understand why I need Jesus,” Stacey says with a laugh. “You really have to love God and love children to teach. I really learned what love was.” Stacey taught English, but her only experience was as a journalist. “The kids didn’t like English, but they loved real-world language arts. That’s what I called it,” she says. “I didn’t know what I was doing, except to use what professionals do … and give kids real-world experiences.” Meanwhile, the family had moved to Prentiss. Stacey taught in nearby Bassville, and Johnny commuted to Deposit Guaranty in Jackson. A few years later, while expecting their second daughter, the Donaldsons heard a horrifying statement: “You could abort if you like.” During a routine ultrasound, a technician noticed what turned out to be a tumor resting on baby Cailyn’s windpipe. The doctor explained that if the child was born, she might have Down’s syndrome and “no quality of life.” Then he left the room. The Donaldsons decided to move forward
with the pregnancy and trust God. At Cailyn’s birth at Ochsner Medical Center in New Orleans, doctors had to first establish an airway, since the tumor was blocking her windpipe. “She was attached to the umbilical cord for 30 minutes (after birth),” Stacey says. “She was breathing on me while they tried to find an airway.” Then Cailyn was taken to another room for the tumor removal. “It took less than an hour (and the tumor) wasn’t attached to anything,” Johnny says. “(The
doctor said) ‘I’ve been doing this 30-something years, and I’ve never seen anything like this. This is a miracle.’” Another miracle soon followed: The Donaldsons received a hospital bill so huge, “I wasn’t even going to try to budget it,” Johnny says — and then they received another bill. The total at the bottom of the second bill was $0. Johnny and Stacey have never figured out what happened. “I never looked into it,” he says. “I don’t want to know who paid it,” mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 21
PHOTOS BY STEGALL IMAGERY
whether the hospital gave them a break, or some rich, anonymous benefactor donated. Instead, they rest in God’s provision. “He showed Himself to be that ever-present help,” Stacey says.
22 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
‘Stacey’s husband’ and ‘Johnny’s wife’ About a year after Cailyn was born, the family moved to Clinton. Ten years after that, in 2014, when Johnny was asked to be president of BankPlus Jackson — with all the Jackson branches reporting to him — he didn’t understand what was happening. The CEO called him in, and Johnny started ranting about why the bank needed a Jackson president. (He was vice president at the time.) “Yes, you’re right,” the CEO said. “That’s why you’re here.” Even as vice president, Johnny didn’t get the drift, he recalls. “In my mind, I’m still that farm kid from Jeff Davis County. I said, ‘You didn’t hear me. We need a president.’” His boss finally got the point across: The job was Johnny’s if he wanted it. He prayed about it and talked with Stacey, close friends and loved ones. He recounts what happened to seal the deal: “I got a text the next morning from somebody who said — ” He pauses to collect himself. “He said, ‘God is lifting you up so that others would see Him in you.’” After reading that, Johnny said, “I think I’ve got my answer.” Johnny became the first-ever AfricanAmerican president at BankPlus, though he’s quick to say his boss didn’t just want to “check
a box.” The CEO told Johnny it was how he came up in the banking world — from a drivethru teller to a branch manager and beyond — that made him “creditable in the board room and the community center.” In his new role, Johnny felt the Holy Spirit reminding him to point others to God and not himself. At his first meeting as president, he opened with a prayer. And his leadership philosophy is about teamwork, not titles. “Yes, I’m the president, OK, but let’s move past that. Let’s roll up our sleeves together,” he says. Similarly, as Stacey has exceled in her career, earning National Board teaching certification and master’s and doctoral degrees, she is reaching back to help others excel too. In addition to her day job designing courses to improve the student learning experience at Belhaven, she serves as candidate support for teachers who are going through the National Board process. “National Board certification is voluntary, not required, but it should be (required),” she says. “Students deserve the best teachers, and teachers deserve professional training to help them be their best.” Believe it or not, “Mississippi is seventh in
the nation as far as (percentage of) boardcertified teachers,” Stacey says, and the state Legislature supports the effort financially. The more Stacey talks about improving education for teachers and students, the more excited she gets. “I love it. I love it!” she says. Johnny brags on Stacey being named Mississippi Teacher of the Year, traveling all over the country as a representative of Mississippi, and even getting to visit the White House. “I went to the Rose Garden because of her,” he says. In college, Johnny was known as “Stacey’s boyfriend” due to her budding TV journalism career. Today, in her teaching context, he’s known as “Stacey’s husband.” And at BankPlus functions, Stacey is “Johnny’s wife.” Each is willing to step back and support the other. “He wants what’s best for me; I want what’s best for him,” Stacey says. Whether God’s best includes farm work, news reporting, soldiering, banking or teaching, “I couldn’t have written the story the way God has,” Stacey says. And in the end, the Author of that story is much more important than the Donaldsons, Johnny says. “We truly want Him to get the glory.” Y
Johnny and
Stacey
We so appreciate who you are in Christ and the role you both play in making Him known in our community, our state and our world. We love you, Sheree Tynes and Jacqueline Mack BOARD MEMBERS OF MISSION MISSISSIPPI
BankPlus was founded as a true community bank. And we’ve been serving our communities for over 100
Community is an investment.
years. To us, this means much more than banking. We’re committed to improving quality of life and making a positive di erence for our customers and neighbors. BankPlus. It’s more than a name. It’s a promise. Learn more at bankplus.net.
AND TOGETHER WE MAKE IT GROW.
© Copyright 2021 BankPlus. Member FDIC.
mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 23
FEATURE STORY
by KATIE EUBANKS • Photos courtesy of Stacey Ayars except where noted
Matt and Stacey Ayars How God brought them from Haiti to Mississippi
I
magine accepting a job in a foreign culture in another country, preparing
HANNAH HILLIS
to move in a couple months — and then suddenly being told you no longer have months, but hours. You have to move tomorrow. That’s what happened to Matt and Stacey Ayars and their four children as the COVID-19 pandemic hit in spring 2020. The “foreign” culture they were about to enter? Ridgeland, Mississippi. The beloved home they were leaving after 13 years? Haiti. To be fair, Mississippi isn’t “foreign” to Matt and Stacey in the traditional sense. After all, they are American. She’s from Columbus, Ohio, he’s from New Jersey, and they met at Asbury University in Wilmore, Kentucky. But before arriving in the Magnolia State, they spent about a third of their lives in Haiti. They moved there as soon as they could get married, grab their degrees and launch out. Haiti is where they raised their kids and made friends. And it’s where they learned the value of community — the fact that “it’s never about a project or program or budget. It’s about the personal relationships,” says Matt, president of Wesley Biblical Seminary in Ridgeland. That’s a lesson he and Stacey never want to forget as they continue following God’s call in Mississippi.
Clockwise from top left: Stacey, Benjamin, Matt, Sofia, Nora and Lily Ayars on Easter Sunday 2020, shortly after moving to Ridgeland after 13 years in Acul-du-Nord, Haiti. 24 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
A five-year commitment While Matt and Stacey were dating, she felt a call to work in full-time missions, and he felt led to preach God’s Word. So they got married right after their junior year “because we wanted to go to the mission field as soon as we could,” Matt says. They found the perfect opportunity that fit their skill sets: Emmaus University, in Acul-duNord, Haiti, was “desperate for Bible teachers and needed a marketing director,” Stacey says. Matt could teach, and she had a photojournalism degree. Plus, she had already worked in Haiti. They moved to Acul-du-Nord in 2007. “We committed to five years,” Stacey says. “We thought we’d not have kids for five years, and just pour ourselves out.”
In April, Stacey and the kids visited Pastor Enick and his family. Enick has been friends with Matt and Stacey since they first moved to Haiti.
The Ayars kids with Haitian family.
The market where the Ayars family bought produce in Haiti. mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 25
Sofia Ayars with classmates in Haiti.
Matt and Stacey at the house they lived in when they first moved to Haiti in 2007.
JEFF BAKOS
A higher quality of life “For me, compared to our culture, it’s exotic,” Matt says. “It’s super hot, super dusty, super poor. It’s mountainous. You’re a minority everywhere. You’re adapting to new cultural norms — and the burden of being a teacher.” There were no paved roads, no convenience
26 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
stores, and minimal electricity where Matt and Stacey lived. They take turns rattling off the challenges they dealt with: Getting a fan to work. Not getting malaria. Teaching biblical Hebrew to non-native English speakers. (Insert panicked laughter here.) “I was still trying to figure out how to cook anyway, how to be married,” Stacey says. “And (Matt was) trying to deal with electricity and water.” There was no city water, so they had to pump their own. For electricity, they had diesel generators at first, and later solar power. The electricity went out at night and wasn’t enough to keep the refrigerator cold. But Matt and Stacey were the only people in their village who had a refrigerator. When asked to describe Haitian food, Stacey says: “Everything is rice. So rice and beans … some kind of vegetables. Maybe a small amount of meat (usually goat). Because there’s no refrigeration, there’s no dairy. The main meal is lunch, and that’s rice and beans. For dinner it may be a cup of tea.” The Haitian dish that the Ayars kids still crave today is something that might not sound appetizing: spaghetti for breakfast. “It’s like a garlic and oil spaghetti, with a big glob of mayonnaise and a big glob of ketchup,” Stacey says. Sometimes folks would put spaghetti and milk in a blender and drink it like a smoothie — warm, remember, because no refrigeration. It’s actually good, Stacey and Matt say, and is sort of like Cream of Wheat. When they weren’t navigating a new menu,
new jobs and new people, they were struggling to get in touch with family due to poor internet. But as with the fridge, “nobody else even had a laptop. It was humbling,” Stacey says. “When we first got there and we didn’t have friends and family, that first year was rough. But after we (found community), all those other (convenience) things became secondary.” Matt says simply, “Their standard of living is low, but their quality of life is high.” Not just a job Two years into their time in Haiti, Matt and Stacey welcomed their oldest daughter, Lily. So what happened to not having kids for five years? “I think we realized we weren’t doing a job,” Stacey says. “(Haiti) was our life.” Secondly, “(the work) was never done,” she says. The things they thought they’d accomplish in Haiti in five years? No way. They stayed for 13. “It took us years to even get to a place with people where they trusted us,” Stacey says. Lily, now 12, was followed by Sofia, 10; Nora, 5; and Benjamin, 2. While the family thrived, especially the kids, Stacey and Matt did struggle with some parts of their lives in Haiti, beyond the lack of firstworld amenities. Matt, an introvert, was “used to being able to just go to Barnes & Noble or take a drive” to have some time alone, he says. But there is no “alone time” in the Haitian culture, and there was no place to get away to. Instead, he found solace playing guitar. Stacey missed her family. “While we were there having our babies, my sister was here (in
Matt led a weekly men’s Bible study in Acul-du-Nord for years.
America) having her babies. But I got to be an aunt to plenty of kiddos there.”
“We thought we’d be going back (to Haiti) in two weeks,” Stacey says. Instead, she and Matt slowly adjusted to life in metro Jackson — a place they’d never lived before — in the middle of a pandemic.
New calling, new adjustments From 2008 to 2012, Matt and several Haitian friends took online courses at Wesley Biblical Seminary. Once a year, he traveled to the metro Jackson campus for a three-week intensive. Then in 2019, WBS President John Neihof suddenly passed away. “They reached out to me (to apply for the position),” Matt says. He said no at first — more than once —but then, “not thinking we’d ever get it in a million years, and at the counsel of some trusted friends, I sent in the paperwork.” When he was offered the position, “we sensed God saying yes,” he says. “We shared with the (Emmaus) Matt at the Emmaus University chapel. school board in February that we felt the Lord calling us here,” Stacey says. Then on “I didn’t know one person,” Stacey says. March 25, they got a call from their mission “I was here in community with my organization, One Mission Society, saying they coworkers (at WBS) every day,” Matt says. “She’s had to leave Haiti the next day due to COVID-19. at home with the kids homeschooling. It was By that time, Matt was president of Haiti all over again: new place, exotic culture.” Emmaus University. He was leaving in the At times, Stacey says, it was hard to make middle of his final semester in that role. sense of awkward interactions: “‘What if this is
COVID? What if this is Mississippi and the South? What if this is this person’s personality?’ I felt very lost for a while. “I wouldn’t want to do that part again, ever,” she says. “But you look back now and go, ‘OK, the Lord was here, and He was doing this.’” The kids have had to adjust, too, and not just because of COVID. “In Haiti, we lived on a seven, eightacre walled campus,” Matt says. “It was summer every day. They had full reign … to go to the kitchen and help make blended spaghetti, or help butcher the goat. Here, it’s like, you can go play in this tiny little backyard, but not out front because there’s traffic.” “And I have to be able to see you at all times,” Stacey says. In addition, “(our kids) know how to make friends in Haiti,” Stacey says. “It’s a totally different culture here.” For instance, Haitian kids are more likely to welcome a stranger than American kids are. The Ayars children have had to initiate a lot of friendships here. But they’ve done it. “They’re very comfortable in their skin,” Stacey says. “They can talk to anybody.” That comes from living in Haiti, where mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 27
neighbors spend quality time together and you’re never alone. That sense of community is one of the main things the Ayars family is determined to keep with them in their new home. ‘People are people’ In Haiti, if people found out you were sick, “you knew the next day there’d be a line at your door,” Stacey says. That kind of direct, personal support doesn’t always happen naturally in America’s individualistic culture. But every Sunday night in Ridgeland, the Ayars family has dinner with their neighbors. “It’s our favorite night of the week,” Stacey says. “We (also) take lots of walks so we can be visible and suck people into being our friend.” In Haiti, the kids went three days a week to the Haitian school, and spent three days a week homeschooling. The latter was unheard-of in Haiti since many mothers don’t have the education to teach their kids. But in metro Jackson, homeschooling is pretty common, especially after COVID. “I was really shocked that all kinds of people homeschool here,” Stacey says. On
Fridays the kids attend an enrichment program with other local homeschoolers, so their siblings aren’t their only classmates. The family has also been able to find a church, after visiting “tons and tons” of
Lily Ayars gets a cooking lesson in Haiti.
different ones, Stacey says. They’ve settled in at Foundry Church in Flowood, where most of the congregation are twentysomethings. One night at a church function, Stacey made a self-deprecating joke about being older and “not cool” compared to their young friends, and one of those friends replied, “Did
it ever occur to you that that’s exactly what we wanted?” Point taken. In fact, that’s part of why Matt and Stacey felt led to Foundry. “We wanted to go where we were most needed,” Matt says. Stacey still works remotely as marketing director for Emmaus, and will visit in person once a semester. In April, she spent two weeks there with the kids, who ate their weight in spaghetti for breakfast. Matt still teaches a three-week intensive at Emmaus once a year. Meanwhile, he’s excited about where WBS is going. “We’ve got a really healthy culture, we have more students than we’ve ever had, financially we’re in good shape, and we’re the most racially diverse seminary in the nation,” he says. He and Stacey both have found the next step of their calling. They always said they’d go wherever God sent them — whether Haiti, Mississippi, or anywhere else. And in the end, living on mission doesn’t change as much from country to country as we might assume, Matt says. “People are people are people.” Y
MASTER OF DIVINITY DOCTOR OF MINISTRY MASTER OF ARTS GRADUATE CERTIFICATE BACHELOR OF ARTS (BEGINNING FALL 2021)
AUDIT CLASSES
28 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Wesley Biblical Seminary exists to train men and women to be effective ministers of the gospel. For forty-seven years, WBS has been equipping students with the knowledge and skills to communicate the gospel to a world that needs a Savior.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
recipes by KATHERINE COWGER
Recipes approved by Dad In honor of Father’s Day, we asked our friend Katherine Cowger for a few dad-friendly recipes we could share with the men in our lives this month. Not only did she deliver, her dad personally approved the recipes, and so do we! Y
BACON-WRAPPED, WALNUT AND GOAT CHEESE-STUFFED DATES 12 4 ¼ 12 2 1 ¼
fresh Medjool dates, pitted ounces creamy goat cheese cup finely chopped walnuts slices bacon tablespoons honey teaspoon fresh chopped rosemary teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes Salt and pepper
Preheat oven to 425 degrees and line a baking pan with foil. Prepare dates by removing the pits, slicing lengthwise, being careful not to slice all the way through, to create a pocket for the filling. (Gently pressing the sides of the date can create more surface area.) Next, stir together the goat cheese and walnuts. Stuff each date with the mixture and wrap in a slice of bacon. Place dates on baking sheet and bake 15-20 minutes or until bacon reaches desired crispiness. While dates are baking, combine honey, rosemary, red pepper flakes and a pinch of salt and pepper. Drizzle honey mixture over dates once removed from oven. Best served warm! Makes 12
SMASHED RED POTATOES WITH BACON DRESSING 1 pound petite red potatoes 1–2 tablespoons olive oil or cooking spray 2 teaspoons grilling seasoning such as Shapley’s, Ely’s or Sprouts 1 teaspoon paprika Bacon dressing: 2 slices bacon, chopped 1 tablespoon honey 2 teaspoons Dijon mustard 1 clove garlic, minced 1 teaspoon fresh chopped rosemary
Bring a large pot of water to a boil. Preheat oven to 450 degrees and line a baking sheet with foil. Spray the pan with cooking spray or drizzle olive oil, and set aside. Add potatoes to boiling water and cook about 15 minutes or until tender. Strain potatoes and place on baking pan. Smash each potato gently with a spoon or the bottom of a glass to create a disk shape. Coat with cooking spray or olive oil, and season each side with grilling seasoning and paprika. Place in oven for 20–30 minutes, flipping halfway through, until crisp and golden brown. Make the dressing by cooking bacon in a saucepan until crispy. Once cooked, turn off heat and remove bacon from pan. Add honey, mustard, garlic and rosemary to the pan with the drippings, whisking until smooth. Add bacon back to the mixture. Once potatoes are crisp, remove from oven, serve over a plate of mixed greens, and drizzle with bacon dressing. Serves 3-4
HONEY-WALNUTROSEMARY SALMON 1 pound salmon, sliced lengthwise into 3 pieces 3 teaspoons Dijon mustard Salt and pepper ¼ cup finely chopped walnuts 2 tablespoons panko breadcrumbs 1 large clove garlic, minced 1 tablespoon olive oil, plus extra for pan 1 teaspoon fresh chopped rosemary 1 tablespoon honey ¼ teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
Preheat oven to 425 degrees, line a sheet pan with foil or parchment, and spray with cooking spray or coat with olive oil. Coat each fillet with mustard, salt and pepper. In a bowl, mix the chopped walnuts, breadcrumbs, garlic, ½ teaspoon of the rosemary, and olive oil. Top each fillet with walnut mixture. Bake about 12 minutes until the top is crisp and golden or salmon reaches 145 degrees. While salmon is cooking, mix honey, red pepper, and ½ teaspoon of rosemary. Drizzle over top of salmon once removed from oven. Serve immediately. Serves 3 Katherine Cowger is a sophomore from Madison studying health sciences and nutrition at Samford University in Birmingham, Alabama. In her free time, she enjoys working out, running, and spending time in her kitchen. mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 29
THIS IS MY STORY
by DANIELLE (last name withheld for privacy)
How I made it through my unplanned pregnancy
RICH PERSPECTIVES
ERICA BURLESON
W
hen I first found out I was pregnant, I was devastated. I was scared, angry, bitter and lost. The Center for Pregnancy Choices (CPC) helped me regain myself. They helped me sort through my fears and concerns by giving me the support that I needed when my life felt so shaken. At my initial visit with the CPC, they offered me a complimentary sonogram. Being able to see the heartbeat of my baby and knowing there was a life growing inside of me was something that gave me the confirmation that I needed to keep the baby. The CPC is not just about preventing abortions, though. They provided support to me throughout my entire pregnancy with classes for labor/delivery, lactation, postpartum care and meal planning. They also host many events such as a baby’s first Christmas and mommy–and–me photos. Additionally, they connected me with a group called Embrace Grace, which is a ministry that partners with the CPC. Embrace Grace uses a biblically based curriculum that lasts for 12 weeks. When the leader reached out to me, we just met for coffee and talked. She didn’t pressure me. She listened to me and gave me encouragement. The sonogram helped me decide to keep my baby, but if it hadn’t been for Embrace Grace, I wouldn’t have had the joy that I developed for my pregnancy. In that group, women who also had unexpected pregnancies were able to support one another, which made me feel like I wasn’t alone. That support meant the world to me. Embrace Grace helped me tremendously on this journey that I once thought I could not travel. The women from my group, as well as previous Embrace Grace members, join together to support one another both at the church and outside of the church. Many of us come back after we have given birth to encourage the new moms in the group with our stories and to help provide baby showers for their babies. My life is now a reflection of what Joseph said in Genesis 50:20 — “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” While in Embrace Grace, I realized the need of fully giving my life to Christ. I was baptized at The Pointe Church by my leader, Betty Hodge. After giving my life to Christ, everything changed for me. My faith in God is now stronger than it has ever been. I have been able to transform during my journey because “I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame” (Psalm 34:4-5). I am still connected to the church and Embrace Grace. This semester I am helping lead a group. I have been balancing a job, college, and raising my two children, but being on this journey with God has me looking for a deeper purpose. I want to make a difference in the lives of women who can’t find their purpose, who feel alone, or who just need support, because I know that there are so many women like myself who don’t have it, are afraid to ask for it, or simply don’t know where to find it. I am so thankful that God led me to the CPC and rescued me from a life that wasn’t meant for me. God has big plans for me and my children. I love that the CPC and my church leaders are still walking this journey out with me, and I am looking forward to the ways that God will use my story to help other women with unplanned pregnancies. Y
30 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
If you aren’t sure whether you have a relationship with God or where you’ll go when you die, please don’t put this magazine down until you’ve read the following:
✝ THE PROBLEM
For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. – Romans 3:23 For the wages of sin is death… – Romans 6:23a The natural result and consequence of our sin is eternal death, or hell (Revelation 20:15), separated from God. This is because God is completely perfect and holy (Matthew 5:48), and His justice demands that sin be punished (Proverbs 11:21).
✝ THE SOLUTION
…but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. – Romans 6:23b But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8 Jesus Christ died in our place on the cross and took on the punishment for all our sins (Isaiah 53:4-6). Then God raised Him from the dead (John 20)!
✝ HOW TO RECEIVE SALVATION
If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. – Romans 10:9 Trust in what Jesus has done for you — His death for your sins and His resurrection — and trust Him as Lord.
✝ IS IT FOR ANYONE?
For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. – Romans 10:13
✝ THE RESULTS
Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. – Romans 5:1 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39
✝ WHAT TO DO NEXT
So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. – Romans 10:17
If you decided to trust in Jesus, grow in your faith by reading more of God’s Word in the Bible. We recommend the gospel of John (it comes just after Luke) as a good starting point — or Romans! Finding a church close to you that teaches faith in Christ is another important step. It’s crucial to spend time with other believers so we can encourage each other in our faith. If you have questions about anything on this page, please contact us at 601.896.1432, or send us a message on Facebook @MSChristianLiving, Instagram @mschristianmag or Twitter @MSChristLiving. mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 31
A CUP OF ENCOURAGEMENT
by LAURA LEE LEATHERS
Lessons from Dad’s toolbox
M
y dad had a shop that any man would envy. He had every tool imaginable for every need — and each item in its place. As his eldest daughter, I learned about the tools and how to use them. I also learned (the hard way) to put each tool back in its assigned spot. And shovels and hoes were to be returned with the dirt cleaned off, and a coating of oil applied with a paintbrush. I recently pulled Dad’s toolbox from the barn and placed it on the patio, and my thoughts turned to lessons learned from him — including a strong work ethic. Here are a few thoughts: Work is not a curse (though the fall did make work harder). Helping Dad wasn’t at the top of my list as a young person. But it was all for my good, and things I learned then are beneficial to me today. In Genesis 2:15 (ESV), “The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.” God gave man work. There is dignity in work. Humanity, created in God’s image, represents Him, and we serve Him through work. If you don’t work, you don’t eat. When my children were growing up, I would quote the last half of 2 Thessalonians
Each child would proudly give me a rundown of what they had accomplished. Do your work for the Lord, not man. Confession time: This isn’t easy for me. I tend to look at the circumstances, the injustices, and comparisons. Paul wrote, “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ” (Colossians 3:23-24). This verse convicts my heart every time. I often fall short of “doing my work heartily for the Lord.” Two words come to my mind: attitude, and servant. When my perspective, aligned with God’s Word, is correct, it’s incredible how my focus is better. I do the work heartily because I’m doing it for Him, not my employer. But the employer also benefits. A servant heart speaks volumes of Christ’s transforming work in our lives as we share Him with a world that is selfcentered, rude, and unwilling to work.
Dad in his shop, with each item in its place.
3:10, “If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat,” a practical principle written by Paul to the church at Thessalonica. Before supper I would ask, “What work did you do today?”
Work brings rewards and blessings. Joseph is an excellent example of God’s provision and blessings. Read Genesis 39:2-6. Let’s hone in on several phrases: “The Lord was
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with Joseph, and he became a successful man” (v. 2); “His master saw that the Lord was with him (and) caused all that he did to succeed” (v. 3); “Joseph found favor in his sight and attended him” (v. 4); and Potiphar “left all that he had in Joseph's charge” (v. 6). Are you giving your best effort and trusting God’s provision to equip you with what you need in your work? Joseph did! As we do our work unto the Lord, our employer recognizes that we are trustworthy and that our goal is to see the business grow. You are making a difference, whatever your “work.” Each individual is uniquely gifted with talents, abilities and knowledge. However, believers also have God’s presence, His wisdom, and the opportunity to share Christ in the marketplace. We also receive monetary benefits as we “work for our bread,” a wage for the work we produce. Jesus completed His Father’s work. Joseph, Jesus’ earthly stepfather, was a carpenter. Usually around 12 years old, a Jewish son began to learn his father’s occupation (see Mark 6:3, Matthew 13:55). But Jesus’ most significant work was fulfilling what His Heavenly Father sent Him to complete: Through His death, burial and resurrection, He provided salvation for everyone who repents and believes, “that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9, NKJV). God is always at work. Paul wrote, “for it is God who works in you both to will and to work for His good pleasure” (Philippians 2:13). God is our provider! It is a comfort to know that God is always at work accomplishing His purpose and plan in us, no matter what. Y
In this new season of her life, Laura Lee hopes to focus on her three passions: freelance writing, sharing and serving through hospitality, and cultivating Lady Laura’s Garden, a cut-flower farm. You can contact her at LauraLeeLeathers.com.
mschristianliving.com ❘ JUNE 2021 33
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Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is in the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.
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~ JEREMIAH 17:7, ESV
In the fear of the LORD one has strong confidence, and his children will have a refuge.
The righteous man walks in his integrity; his children are blessed after him. ~ PROVERBS 20:7, NKJV
~ PROVERBS 14:26
And I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty. ~ 2 CORINTHIANS 6:18, ESV
As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust. ~ PSALM 103:13, ESV
The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family. ~ Reed Markham
Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. ~ PROVERBS 10:9
If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him! ~ MATTHEW 7:11, ESV
Dads are the most ordinary men turned by love into heroes, adventurers, storytellers, and singers of song. ~ Unknown
Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.
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~ PROVERBS 14:29
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A good man obtains favor from the Lord. ~ PROVERBS 12:2A, NKJV
The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice; he who fathers a wise son will be glad in him. ~ PROVERBS 23:24
“Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. ~ EPHESIANS 6:2-4, ESV 34 JUNE 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
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