Mom care

Moms

The case for practicing self-care this holiday season

BY HANNAH SCHMITT

The term “self-care” seems to be getting more and more popular among moms, but a true definition for it is as elusive as the time many mothers feel they have to practice it.

The New York Times humorously defines self-care as “The practice of taking action to ‘preserve or improve one’s own health,’ according to Oxford Dictionaries. Self-care is for anyone who wants it. It can be as easy— and as free— as taking a walk, or as complex as learning a trade. Self-care can include, but is not limited to: saying no; buying things; refusing to buy things; taking a long walk; helping others; exercising; crafting; stockpiling and organizing things like coins and arranging them meticulously into Ziploc bags; stretching; listening to disco; spending time alone; singing karaoke (sometimes, alone); intending to one day start meditating.”

Thai-An Truong, a local therapist and mother, said a great way to take care of yourself is to stop trying to stay on top of the parenting game. That’s especially true at the holidays.

“There’s no competition and you will burn out continuing to try to stay on top,” she said. “Let go of external comparison with other moms. Look inward on your inner joy and sense of connection with the kids to gauge parenting health.”

She suggested moms who feel spread thin should give themselves grace, stop chasing perfection and simplify their lives a little. Mindful moments with no distractions or technology can be very restorative, she said, even if that means saying “no” to some extracurriculars or other activities. In some cases, it may be necessary to even see a therapist to discuss how to take care of yourself, she said.

If you’re not quite to the point of needing a therapist but you know you need to take better care of yourself in order to pour into others, practicing some simple routines and rituals can help.

Angela Hodgkinson is a local mom of two and the co-owner of Solare, a Plaza District shop focused on natural beauty. She’s learned first-hand that although women are often taught to take care of everyone but themselves, spending a little time focused on herself goes a long way.

“I think mothers have a really hard time in general taking care of themselves,” she said. “I’m learning myself that I have to take care of myself to have something to give to work, to my family and my other relationships.”

Being in the beauty industry, Hodgkinson has realized the connection between looking good on the outside and feeling good on the inside, so she has a handful of simple beauty routines she recommends for moms who are short on time. With 4-year-old Nico and 1-year-old Cy getting ready with her every morning, she makes time to do just a few beauty rituals that help her feel cared for, including using a body brush and oil on her skin and a copper tongue scraper.

Women are often conditioned not to tell others exactly what they want or need, but adding beauty or self-care items to your Christmas list or even buying them for yourself is a great first step toward self-care this season.

Find specific items Hodgkinson recommends at www.metrofamilymagazine.com/selfcare.

Editor’s Note: To learn more about selfcare tips from local experts, visit our Ask the Experts panel on the topic at www. metrofamilymagazine.com/Ask-the-Experts- Mom-Care.

6

METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / DECEMBER 2018