Trolls Band Together

by Reverend Jen Miller

My name is Reverend Jen and I love Trolls. Not Internet Trolls: the other kind with big hair and smiles that turned the whole world on while it tuned in and dropped out. In 2000, my love for Trolls led me to open “Reverend Jen’s Lower East Side Troll Museum” which was open to the public and situated in my old tenement apartment. The Troll Museum quickly became world famous and was featured on news networks in Japan, Spain, and Brazil, and on the Smithsonian Network’s “Stories from the Vaults” and New York’s Channel 11 Evening News. The Troll Museum operated on the LES until 2016 when it was evicted and became a “Troll Pantry” in Brooklyn. While I look for a permanent museum location, it has become a “traveling Troll Museum” and has been exhibited at Ace Hotel in Manhattan and MF Gallery in Brooklyn. It is important to note that while another Troll Museum located in Ohio called “The Troll Hole” opened in 2014, Reverend Jen’s Lower East Side Troll Museum is the original American Troll Museum.

It’s therefore no surprise that many consider me to be the world’s leading Trollologist and I am often summoned to write opinions on all things Troll like the latest trailer for Trolls Band Together, Dreamworks’ third installment in the Trolls series. So let’s dig right in. For lack of a better word, the trailer is trippy. Like, if you’ve never done LSD, you don’t need to. Just watch this trailer. Actually, watch it a few times because so much happens, it will like totally blow your mind, man.

The trailer begins in the three-dimensional Troll Village with a Troll rolling out a psychedelic carpet for the Royal Wedding between Ogres, Bridget (Zooey Deschanel), and Gristle Junior (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) who we first met in 2016’s “Trolls” when Bridget’s love for Gristle Junior transformed him from a would-be TrollEater into a benevolent ally of Trolls everywhere.

We then see our two protagonists, Branch (Justin Timberlake) and Poppy (Anna Kendrick) who float into the scene on anthropomorphic clouds. After months of flirting, they are now officially a couple (#broppy!) Branch says, “Poppy, We are gonna be late for the Royal Wedding! Let’s go get married!” He then corrects himself, “I mean, let’s go get Bridget and Gristle married.” Though it’s obvious to viewers that Branch and Poppy are soulmates, they are still in that awkward phase. Avoiding further conversation, they float into the sky where they are joined by other Trolls on clouds for a Busby Berkeley-style dance number. Transition to Cloud Guy (Walt Dohrn) who is passed out on a cardboard box, surrounded by half-eaten slices of pizza, recovering from a crazy bachelor party. Wearing nothing but striped tube socks, jelly bracelets, and neon Glow-Stick Raver glasses, he then proceeds to vomit rainbow glitter. Back at the wedding, Tiny Diamond (Kenan Thompson), the smallest and scrappiest Troll is not cool with being dressed as a Flower or being the Flower Boy. He sheds his flower and pronounces himself the “Flower Man.”

And it’s time for the nuptials! The ceremony barely gets underway when it’s interrupted by a blue Troll dressed in a Vegan Sherpa jacket and ski goggles careening into it on a zip-line. This Troll’s name is John Dory (Eric André) and he is one of Branch’s four older brothers. Unbeknownst to Poppy, Branch had a whole life before he met her. He was once part of her favorite boyband phenomenon, BroZone, along with his brothers. BroZone disbanded when Branch was still a baby, as did the family, and Branch hasn’t seen his brothers since. In the Peanut Gallery, Tiny Diamond watches the drama unfold alongside Mr. Dinkles (Kevin Michael Richardson) a worm of few words who looks like he’s permanently stuck in a k-hole. He is dressed for the occasion, wearing an Elizabethan Ruff and a monocle. But, it looks like Poppy won’t have time to catch any bouquets because this John Dory character has convinced them they must go at once to find the rest of the family and reunite BroZone. (Not revealed in the trailer: Branch’s other bro, Floyd has been kidnapped for his musical talents by a pair of nefarious pop-star villains.) Branch, Poppy, John, and Tiny Diamond then all jump in their touring “Caterbus”, which is, you guessed it…a hybrid caterpillar/bus with a mouth, eyes, and stripes on the sides. When Tiny D hits the “hustle” button on the Caterbus all hell breaks loose. The Caterbus jolts into the air and goes through a kaleidoscopic star-shaped portal whereupon they are transformed into twodimensional characters in a cartoon landscape reminiscent of Peter Max, the Freak Brothers, and R. Crumb. After being psychedelicized, they are dropped back through the portal and returned to three-dimensional life. “Too much hustle is a thing,” Poppy states while all Branch can do is stare at the rainbow-hued visual trails projecting forth from his hand. The doors of perception have been opened for these Trolls and there is no going back. All that in just two minutes and eighteen seconds. I can't believe there's a whole movie that comes after it. The overall groovy tone of the Trolls Band Together trailer is fitting, given the movie is based on The Good Luck Troll, which was invented by Thomas Dam in Denmark. Dam’s Trolls shot to fame in 1960s America where countless companies who knocked off the original design flooded a booming economy with Trolls. Collected by children, they quickly became associated with the counterculture Trolls, with their dilated pupils, outstretched arms, colorful clothes, frequent nudity, and long shaggy hair, looked an awful lot like hippies. But, if I am being totally honest, I will never love Branch and Poppy the way I love my vintage troll dolls with their musty smells and lopsided smiles. Though each Troll is a mass-produced variant of another, no two are alike because each has a human who imparts their own magic onto the dime-store talismans. And much like a movie can almost never be as good as the book it’s based on, a movie can never be as good as the toy it’s based on. With a toy, you write the script using only your imagination.

My 1967 Caveman Troll stares out the window onto modern-day Brooklyn. He doesn't know it’s not still the Summer of Love or that the world’s passed him by. He’s still grooving with the eternal now. But, Branch and Poppy are modern Trolls for the Digital Age. They are talkative, neurotic, and cleaned up. Their faces are symmetrical, their hair is combed and their felt outfits are pressed. But, they just aren’t as cute as the original doll. Almost like Dreamworks tried to “make” them cute and didn’t realize everything cute is also a little ugly. I don’t hate them the way I hated Scrappy Doo who was so at odds with Scooby’s stoner lifestyle. In fact, when I see a little child wearing a Poppy backpack (there are a lot of them) it’s thrilling to realize Trolls have persevered and found new fans. It should also be noted that the Troll movies were produced after Dreamworks made a financial deal with Dam Things in Denmark. Hopefully, it was a large chunk of change to make up for the fact that Dam Things lost millions to imitators before their copyright was restored in 1996. And maybe those kids who dig Branch and Poppy now will take a look at the colorful history of Trolls. Maybe they’ll even visit the future Troll Museum. Throughout my life, people have asked me why I collect Trolls. Is it good luck? The hair? The big eyes? That’s just a small part of it. Trolls, with their outstretched arms and blissful smiles, symbolize hope. They offer unwavering grooviness in the face of adversity, which is why you see them everywhere. And that is why, for all my issues with these modern trolls being too modern, I’m gonna see this movie.

Reverend Jen is a painter and writer who lives in Brooklyn. Prints of her artwork are available at https://www.etsy.com/ shop/RevWorld