East Bay Magazine November 2022

Celebrations

A RESOURCE GUIDE FOR WEDDINGS AND THE BIGGEST PARTIES OF OUR LIVES

Fearless,

Pursue

Love Marriage &

Celebrating unions of all kinds in the East Bay

The last wedding I attended was for Oakland friends on a beach in Carmel, five years ago. It was an elegant occasion, covered by global media outlets, including The Guardian.

The bride wore white lace, her bouquet outfitted with fresh, large buds of cannabis. Instead of an endof-ceremony kiss, the bride and groom united at the altar by taking “dabs” (i.e., inhaled cannabis concentrate). Infused cotton candy, joint-filled gift bags and a dapper pot sommelier provided 70-plus reception guests with an array of event enhancers.

I always imagined my own nuptials would more closely resemble the extended wedding scene in the 2008

Isabella Cook is a Bay Area-based journalist who strives to highlight local nonprofits, events and businesses (especially foodrelated).

film, Rachel Getting Married. Tragic lead character drama aside, the scene depicts a weekend of bohemian bliss: A steady stream of multicultural musicians plays, while friends and family pontificate about love amidst an abundance of flowers, bejeweled and feathered samba dancers, and endless plates of Indian food and barbecue in the backyard.

Now, I’m not married, but this month I’ve entered a union of a di erent kind: editing this magazine.

Previously I’ve edited and written for publications throughout California and Hawaii. Oakland has been my home, happily, for the past 14 years. And it’s a real joy to discover the wealth of local resources we have for all things celebratory and matrimonial.

Nikki Silverstein is an award-winning journalist who lives in Sausalito with her Chiweenie and an assortment of foster dogs.

Janis Hashe regularly contributes to the East Bay Express and other Bay Area publications.

Everything from o eat venues to catering tips, custom-order bakeries and data to support your impending proposal is here to bolster your big event. Plus there’s a bit of local country twang and Parisian decadence, since we’re into that sort of thing.

In its own way, this magazine is a celebration of love—for the East Bay. I’m grateful to prior editor, Daedalus Howell, for crafting within these pages a dinner party worth attending, as he suggested in our premiere issue. While he continues his prolific editing elsewhere, I’m thrilled to catch the figurative bouquet (sans buds) and expand our party into a grand, nearmonthly a air.

– Samantha Campos, Editor

PHOTO BY SHOSHANA IRJA

j. poet has been writing about music for most of his adult life and has interviewed a wide spectrum of artists including Leonard Cohen, Merle Haggard and Godzilla. He lives in San Francisco.

Jef frey Edalatpour ’s writing about arts, food and culture has appeared in KQED Arts, Metro Silicon Valley, Interview Magazine, Berkeleyside.com, The Rumpus and SF Weekly

SETTING THE SCENE The calm before the storm… or where a good time will be had.

Love is Colorful, Bold and Exciting. Love is worth celebrating!

AMonique

Affair is all about effortless and colorful elegance. We are a collective of designers, planners, and producers who are dedicated to creating heartfelt and unique events.

We are a full-service wedding, corporate, and milestone event planning and execution firm serving the Oakland–San Francisco Bay Area. Our professionally trained event team has been celebrating colorful love for over 45 years combined!

AMA was founded on the belief that all love deserves to be celebrated. In fact, we’ve been celebrating marriage equality since 1999. Our founder, Chanda Daniels, is a celebrated industry leader on the topic of marriage equality and inclusion. You belong here. Weddings belong to everyone.

Tell us your colorful love story and we’ll help you curate a highly creative, comfortable, elegant, and unique event. We’ll be beside you as you select your design aesthetic, choose creative partners, and host one of the best events of your life. We’ll be by your side throughout the entire planning process.

Confessions of a Wedding Caterer

Advice on working with event staff on your special day

BY Isabella Cook

My very first day as a server for a wedding catering company, I learned an important lesson: Weddings are not for the faint of heart. Whether you’re a guest, a worker or an expectant fiancé(e), the day dawns bright with the promise of high emotions, festivity and very little time to sit down and relax.

I remember pouring wine to a table of well-dressed men and women, praying to any deity that would listen that I wouldn’t spill a drop of red on the pristine white tablecloth. And, when I thought I’d finished and turned to fill

more glasses, a man grabbed me by the wrist and said, “Leave the bottle—I’m the father of the bride.” This, perhaps, was the best advice I was lucky enough to receive on my first day of work.

Since then, I have been to hundreds of weddings, watched just as many ceremonies, and have heard about every existing variation of wedding toasts and speeches (including a particularly moving Star Wars-themed soliloquy from an ever-so-slightly tipsy best man).

My role in these weddings? To hand out tasty bites of decadent appetizers on silver plates and to do my best to blend

WEDDING TOASTS Strawberry pea shoot crostini gets the party started.

into the wedding venue walls while simultaneously performing clandestine acts of chaos mitigation. After all, preventing mishaps before they have a chance to happen is the unspoken job of wedding catering staff. On the surface, it may appear that the servers are simply handing out food and pouring out red, white and bubbly like candy on Halloween, but that’s not all there is to the job.

A local Bay catering company, Area Fork Full of Earth Organic Catering, and I have joined forces to share our experiences in the industry and, hopefully, give future brides and

PHOTO COURTESY OF LYNN BAGLEY

We

And for 35 years, The Cooperative Cleaning Company has met this need for the East Bay and Southern Marin Counties’ most discerning clients. CCC delivers exceptional service with a highly reliable, steady staff of professionals whose compensation, platinum level health, dental and vision care, PTO, and 401K benefits exceeds anything offered to housekeepers in the Bay Area, if not the industry as a whole. Licensed. Bonded. Insured.

grooms-to-be some valuable firsthand insight and advice on working with (not against) their caterers.

“During the early years of Fork Full, we were hired to cater a wedding in a beautiful home in Sonoma,” said Jasmine Uyer, sales manager at Fork Full of Earth. “The home was a work in progress, and the groom-to-be was an employee of the homeowners, who were both architects. I conducted a site visit about six months before the wedding, so I thought we had all of the information that we needed about the venue's location and layout.

“But when we arrived to set up, we found that they had renovated the space, and there was a pool in the place where the ceremony was planned to be. The groom figured we could ‘make it work,’ and we did. But lesson learned, always ask if there is a pool in the plan!”

I myself experienced an unexpected pool in the plan when I catered a wedding at a venue that boasted a stunning fountain with turquoise blue waters splashing temptingly in the hot summer afternoon. Even on the clock, the urge to take a quick dip for just a moment was hard to resist. But the venue had a strict $1,000 fine for anyone who dared escape the heat in their purely decorative water feature.

This would have been okay, except for the multitude of (frankly unsupervised, rambunctious) children attending the wedding who were eyeing the fountain as though it were a shining Shangri-La. And so, this pool that was certainly not in the plans became the reason that our company was suddenly short-staffed, sacrificing our servers in shifts to stand watch like pseudo knights of the realm

TASTY SEASONS Fork Full of Earth Organic Catering creates flavorful memories with an autumnal soufflé, beluga lentils and hazelnuts.

to guard the fountain from surprisingly perseverant children.

“Like any relationship, it’s really important to articulate your priorities and limitations to your caterer,” said Angela Ginsburg, executive chef and owner of A Fork Full of Earth. “We have brides come in and apologize for being wordy, demanding or crazy, but I would rather know someone’s dealbreaker before we start than after.

“Tell us how much you want to spend, how much is too much, if you want to separate your brother’s friends from your sister’s friends. Tell us if you absolutely can’t stand it when people put a cheese board out and it’s attacked by wasps and bees. It’s important to lead with your truth—the good, the bad and the ugly.”

These wise words of advice bring another story to mind: the day I catered an extravagant wedding located on the bride’s family’s ranch. No expense was spared in decking out the venue for the special day, and there were even air-conditioned porta-potties that, I’ll confess with no guilt, I used as an unofficial break room a few times, since they were impeccably clean and cool. It seemed as though everything had been considered, except, of course, the combination of outdoor catering and ranch life.

Guests began arriving—one by one their cars careened past our flimsy tent, tires kicking up enough dirt to form opaque dust clouds. We tried our best to shield the food with our bodies, but didn’t achieve much except ensure we got dirty too. After the dust storms died down, we began setting up a cheese board next to, you guessed it, the

LOCAL MEATS California’s wild abundance of ingredients is celebrated with a spring lamb and pistachio dukkah.

PHOTOS COURTESY OF LYNN BAGLEY

»

barn. The flies began swarming before we’d even had a chance to set the plates on their designated tables, and roughly $350-worth of fine meats and cheeses were fed to the flies that day.

“In catering, the one thing you don’t ask is the one thing that will get you,” said Ginsburg. “If you want someone who is meticulous or if you’re the kind of person who flies by the seat of their pants, clearly know what you want and go with someone who aligns with that. There’s no one way to do it right, and every character is different. Being honest about everything is the best way to get the most out of us. Be willing to build trust—it’s hard because you have ideas about how you want things to go, but there’s a real give and take.”

One particular soon-to-be motherin-law (who shall remain unnamed— you know who you are) showed a particular lack of trust in our staff during what was set to be a relatively easy workday. She was always one step ahead of us and, even though her heart was in the right place, her micromanaging created more problems than it resolved. The most notable, i.e., annoying, thing she did was arrive early and pre-set the head table to show

the staff how a “properly made table” should look.

The thing is, she had all the knives facing the wrong direction and switched the proper placement of wine vs. champagne glasses. We fixed it up and continued setting the other tables, only to realize we were two tablecloths short. She had used them to set the head table.

So, we unmade the entire thing, remade it, and wished the mother-in-law had

trusted us enough to go and enjoy the big day with the rest of her family.

Serving delicious food to a wedding full of dashing dudes and dames may seem exciting, and it is. But it only takes a few of these events to realize that many nights will inevitably end with you filling in on unofficial duties, like politely explaining to a guest, in front of their date, that staff isn’t permitted to flirt with them. Or standing on a

‘Like any relationship, it’s really important to articulate your priorities and limitations to your caterer.’ —ANGELA GINSBURG

LOVE BITES Dainty beef tenderloin tataki sets a romantic tone.

PHOTO COURTESY OF LYNN BAGLEY

TOTAL RECYCLING is no end-of-the-pipe dream

The resource pipe has no end - that’s the

and

After

ROASTED ROOTS Fennel aioli accompanies local root vegetables in a feast for the eyes and mouth.

» barstool in front of a riotous crowd, yelling over the din of their unified chant for “whisky!” that the bar is now closed.

“It’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for the bride and her people and a not once-in-a-lifetime thing for the caterer,” said Ginsburg. “For the bride, it’s a totally organic, unique, bespoke experience, which is only possible because it is part of a system that works.”

There is a singular joy in being a part of someone’s most special day, and I always wanted to honor that. Most people who work in the wedding catering industry will bend over backward to ensure the bride and groom have everything their hearts desire. You want a carnival-

themed wedding? We’ll grab our red suspenders and popcorn machine. You want only yellow food? We’ll sort the M&Ms! And if you want the entire staff to break out mid-reception into a seemingly impromptu rendition of the “Macarena”? We’ll be practicing in the back, where no one can see us.

Ultimately, I loved every second I spent catering weddings. It is a privilege and an honor to work behind the scenes, ensuring that every little detail goes off without a hitch while you and your loved one get hitched. The chaos is part of the charm, and preventing it from reaching the wedding party almost becomes a game of sorts.

You cover for the bridesmaid and groomsman that you saw disappearing

into the woods 15 minutes ago, push aside high-heels discarded by dancing guests from the walkway so no one trips, and you do it all with exuberance because, ultimately, this day isn’t about you at all. It’s about making sure everyone is enjoying the wedding and, of course, the food.

Fork Full of Earth Organic Catering strives to create flavorful memories with California’s wild abundance of ingredients. They bring the best the Earth has to offer to Bay Area tables by supporting local farms, preparing with thoughtfulness, and staying committed to preservation and sustainability. And, most importantly, they’ve been in business long enough to know to expect the unexpected pool.

To contact Fork Full of Earth Organic Catering, visit their website at forkfull.com, email info@forkfull.com or call 415.448.5178.

PHOTO COURTESY OF ANGELA GINSBURG

The Financial of Marriage Benefits

BY Nikki Silverstein

SEXY TALK Knowing your mate’s money mindset is crucial to a happy partnership.

Somehow, in a world of eight billion people, you found the one. Whether you got to this point after years of swiping right or a few months of exchanging come-hither glances at the dog park, it probably took a fair amount of work.

Well, gear up for one important last step before you start two-stepping at the wedding reception. Invest time in acquainting yourself with the financial advantages and risks of marriage. From tax breaks to increased retirement savings to spousal death benefits, getting hitched and staying that way certainly has its rewards. Yet there is a flip side to that coin—the clash over cash with a spouse can lead to the downfall of a marriage.

PHOTO BY OLENA YAKOBCHUK/HUTTERSTOCK

Arguing about money, more than any other marital disagreement, is the strongest predictor of divorce, according to "Examining the Relationship Between Financial Issues and Divorce,” a Kansas State University study of 4,500 couples.

"It's not children, sex, in-laws or anything else,” said Sonya Britt, the researcher who conducted the study. “It's money—for both men and women."

While marriage could be a boon to your bank account, it could also leave you in temporary or permanent financial straits. But getting to know your mate’s mindset towards money and their financial situation will play a crucial role in reaching your happily-ever-after goal. Addressing financial topics isn’t romantic, and some couples might find talking about them uncomfortable; it’s a must do before saying I do.

Having these conversations now will build a stronger foundation for your marriage. Both of you need to provide an honest accounting of your overall finances and obligations. This isn’t the time to hold back information, even if it’s negative. And it might alleviate some of those pre-wedding jitters.

Consider marriage as a type of merger. It’s unwise to enter a business partnership without the necessary due diligence, and the same goes for wedlock.

Understanding the balance sheet

their credit score,” she said.

of your betrothed wasn’t much of an issue in past decades when people were getting married earlier in life. Couples were hardly old enough to be financially established. For instance, in the 1960s, the bride’s average age was 20, while the groom was 23, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

Today, folks are getting married for the first time later in life, which means they may have already acquired substantial assets or racked up significant debt. Last year, the average age for a first marriage was 33 for women and 35 for men, as reported by The Knot 2021 Real Weddings Study.

Financial Compatibility

To get a clearer picture of money and marriage matters, we turned to Jacqueline Amrikhas, who has more than 30 years of experience as a certified public accountant in Sausalito. Amrikhas recommends that couples planning on tying the knot sit down together and discuss how each person approaches their finances.

“If you’re going to get married, you really need to find out about the potential spouse’s personal spending, saving habits, overall responsibility when it comes to filing tax returns and

Asking questions is an essential part of the process to determine the financial compatibility of a couple, says Amirkhas. Does the person I’m going to marry have a budget, or do they live paycheck to paycheck? Do they spend more than they make? Before making a purchase, do they consider whether they can afford it or just buy it now and plunk down a credit card? How much credit card debt do they have?

“One person says ‘you’re spending too much’ and the other says ‘you’re not making enough,’”Amirkhas said. “This is very common.”

Different approaches to money are common, and you probably shouldn’t expect your partner’s spending behavior to change. You can blame your future in-laws.

“By the age of seven years, several basic concepts relating broadly to later ‘finance’ behaviours will typically have developed,” according to Habit Formation and Learning in Young Children, a University of Cambridge study.

Financial incompatibility leads to trouble. but there are ways for couples to work together on money management strategies—and ways to protect yourself if you can’t.

Consult Experts

Amirkhas suggests that couples meet with a certified financial planner and a certified public accountant prior to the nuptials. Each person should consult separately with their own CPA to advise on their circumstances. Both partners should sit down together with the financial planner.

Consider marriage as a type of merger. It’s unwise to enter a business partnership without the necessary due diligence, and the same goes for wedlock.

« “It’s good to meet with a financial planner to see what you need to save every year for retirement and make a plan,” Amirkhas said. “Both of you want to get on board for that. If you each have an employer with a 401K program, anything you contribute is pretax.”

A financial planner can also advise on other long-term goals, such as the best way to pay down large amounts of existing debt or saving for a home.

A CPA can help determine whether it would be better for you to file taxes jointly with your spouse or file separately. The IRS offers tax incentives to married couples who file joint tax returns; however, there are cases where you might want to file separately.

When filing a joint return, both spouses are responsible for the taxes due, regardless of whether one spouse earned all the income or claimed improper deductions or credits, according to the IRS.

“If you’ve got a spouse who has a business and they’re not reporting all the income, you’re on the hook when you’re filing a joint return,” Amirkhas said. “The IRS says, ‘we can go after you.’ They treat it as if you both are liable. That’s an advantage of filing separately—the government can’t come to you to collect.”

Personal Choices

Another important consideration is determining whether to combine your finances. Consolidating finances may simplify budgeting, bill paying, saving and investing. Yet if your partner has a great amount of debt or vastly different spending practices, you could opt to keep your accounts separate. In that case, each

of you can contribute to a fund for shared expenses.

Sometimes a partner wants a prenuptial agreement, a written contract a couple signs before the marriage that specifies what will happen with assets and debts after a marriage ends. Sure, it’s not the cheeriest subject when you’re planning on growing old together. But a dissolution of the marriage is a possibility with the divorce rate in the United States at about 40%, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention/National Health Center for Statistics.

A prenup is beneficial if you’re coming into a marriage with more assets than your partner and want to ensure that you keep them in the event of a divorce. Even if neither partner is wealthy, a prenup is a tool to pass assets to children from a previous relationship. You might need a prenup if you plan to delay or forgo your career to stay at home with children because it will provide you financial security in the event of a divorce.

Basically, you want to plan for until death do us part and just in case you fall short by a few years, have provisions in place to protect yourself financially.

Now, let’s move on to the good stuff— the financial advantages of matrimony.

Reaping the Benefits

That old adage about two living as cheaply as one is true. And assuming you’re both working, your union upped your household income. You’re on your way to accumulating more wealth than when you were single.

Two cars. One insurance policy. Your premiums will go down with the multicar discount most insurance companies

offer. Get your homeowner’s insurance from the same insurance company and you should receive a discount for bundling the policies.

Each spouse should check their employer’s health insurance. It may be less expensive for both spouses to be on the same policy.

Bay Area home prices may have kept you from becoming a homeowner when you were single, but you have increased buying power now. You may qualify for a mortgage for that charming cottage in your favorite neighborhood.

When you sell that home, you get a huge tax advantage. Homes in the Bay Area have been increasing in value substantially. A married couple can exclude $500,000 in capital gains on the home’s appreciation, versus $250,000 for a single person.

On the other hand, if you don’t own a home yet, then you’re not paying property taxes and most likely won’t have itemized deductions, according to Amirkhas. Still, being married will lower your tax bill in most cases.

“Tax brackets are more advantageous when you’re a married couple filing jointly,” Amirkhas said. “If you’re single, the standard deduction is $12,550. But when you’re married, it goes up to $25,100. You basically get double the amount to reduce your taxable income.”

Life Changes

Take time to assess your financial situation at least once a year. When you have a major life change, such as a job promotion, going back to school or a baby on the way, new priorities come into play. Adjust your plan and get back to enjoying your wedded bliss. ❤

Mega-Bash to Intimate Vows

East Bay nontraditional settings for ‘I do’

BY Janis Hashe

Where to tie the knot is one of the biggest decisions couples face when planning their weddings. For some, it’s easy. The church they both attend. The park where they met. The dream resort on Maui.

But for those wanting to stay local, and still pondering, here are some ideas for venues that might just be the solution for an unforgettable—and unique— ceremony. Be aware that pent-up demand during the pandemic has meant a flood of weddings, so be prepared

PHOTO BY MAJESTA PATTERSON

THE LOVE BOAT Berkeley Weddings on the Water gives couples their romantic ‘Titanic’ moment, without the iceberg.

to book any of these venues as far in advance as possible.

The Mega-Bash Wedding

THE CRANEWAY PAVILION, RICHMOND

Your wedding is you and 2,199 of your closest friends? Then the 45,000 square-foot Craneway may be just the ticket. Part of the 1931 Ford Assembly Plant Building on the bay at Richmond, the venue can accommodate really large events, up to 2,200 seated.

The adjoining 20,000 square-foot open-air patio can blend indoor and outdoor spaces, accessing spectacular views. In addition to being an historic landmark, the Craneway is also stateof-the-art technically, as it often hosts concerts, with a world-class sound system. There is ample parking, and guests can also arrive by ferry, if they prefer.

The venue will provide an in-house event manager, but couples must provide their own wedding planner or coordinator. The Craneway is the exclusive alcohol provider, and on-site Assemble Marketplace is the default caterer, although outside catering is allowed under some circumstances. Noted the Craneway’s Spenser Dill, weekends at the Craneway are already booked through most of 2023, so the mega-bash will need to be scheduled even further out.

The Craneway Pavilion, 1414 Harbour Way S, Richmond. 510-735-1133, www.craneway. com/book-an-event/

The Family-andQuite-a-FewFriends Wedding

CHILDREN’S FAIRYLAND, OAKLAND

Many Oakland kids grew up asking to go to Children’s Fairyland at Lake Merritt. Now’s your grown-up chance to have a fairyland wedding, if your guest list is between 100 and 300. Children’s Fairyland has been back hosting weddings for more than a year.

Its 10 acres of gardens and whimsical settings will host a canopied amphitheater, both indoor and outdoor seating options, an expansive lawn, water features, and a number of themed areas for receptions and sitdown dinners. Guests can rediscover

childhood with a pirate ship and dragons or take a ride on the Jolly Trolly train. The Chapel of Peace offers a picturesque backdrop for wedding and engagement photos.

Although booking at least three months in advance is recommended, the venue does have some flexibility, and has accommodated weddings which have lost their first venue. It does not do catering, but can provide a list of suggested caterers. Some alcohol and amplified music restrictions are in place. The package will include unlimited pre-event site visits, an event manager, a front gate manager, parking and security.

Children’s Fairyland, 699 Bellevue Ave., Oakland. parkrentals@fairyland.org or 510452-2259, www.fairyland.org/birthdaysand-park-rentals/park-rentals/

PHOTO BY JUNIPER SPRING PHOTOGRAPHY

DOWN TO EARTH Near-centenarian trees bear witness to a ceremony in Stephen T. Mather Redwood Grove at UCB Botanical Gardens.

HANGAR 1 DISTILLERY, ALAMEDA

Industrial chic with great sunsets and views of the bay await the couple who chooses Hangar 1 Distillery. The former plane hangar (now an actual vodka distillery) on the Historic Alameda Naval Base is very large, with multiple staging areas, and can accommodate weddings as small as 50 people, or as large as 600.

There are no cookie-cutter weddings here. “Every single client wants something different,” said events manager Emily Webster, and she goes out of her way to customize each event to their specifications. The idea is to

incorporate the place into the wedding, from including tours of the distillery, to offering cheese-and-vodka pairings at the reception.

Hangar 1 has become a popular wedding venue, and is already taking bookings for September 2024, although Webster noted that there’s more flexibility at certain times of the year.

Hangar 1 Distillery, 2505 Monarch Dr., Alameda. (510) 871-4950, www.hangarone.com/visit/private-events/

UC BERKELEY

BOTANICAL GARDENS

The world-famous, 34-acre UCB Botanical Gardens can be the site for

the most amazing garden wedding ever. Home to more than 10,000 species of plants, it also offers numerous lovely places to take your vows, including the Stephen T. Mather Redwood Grove, as up to 200 guests are seated in a demi-amphitheater built into the hill, surrounded by trees planted in the 1930s.

Historic Julia Morgan Hall, designed by the renowned architect in 1911, was moved to its current location in 2014, and is ideal for small receptions (82 seated) and rehearsal dinners. A short ways away is the elevated Tour Deck, where the wedding couple can be toasted. “Micro ceremonies” of up to «

»

RUSTIC LUXE Historic Julia Morgan Hall at UCB Botanical Gardens is ideal for small receptions and private dinners, seating up to 82.

PHOTO BY JUNIPER SPRING PHOTOGRAPHY

toasted. “Micro ceremonies” of up to 25 people are also possible.

Because of the sensitivity of the site, there are multiple restrictions, such as no hanging of any materials on trees, light cables, walls, ceilings. No flames, sparklers, embers or candles are allowed in the grove or hall. Pets and animals, the release of birds or butterflies, use of rice, confetti, poppers and fake flower petals are also not allowed.

The gardens uses a list of preferred caterers, who will understand how to make the most of a truly special, Earthbeloved site. Some 2023 dates are still available (minimum two months in advance), and 2024 bookings open Feb. 1, 2024.

UC Berkeley Botanical Gardens, 200 Centennial Dr., Berkeley. 510-642-03352, gardenrentals@berkeley.edu, www. botanicalgarden.berkeley.edu/rentals

CHABOT SPACE AND SCIENCE CENTER, OAKLAND

Celebrate the science of love at Oakland’s Chabot Space and Science Center, which o ers multiple wedding packages. Depending on where the ceremony takes place, “under the stars or just partying among them,” as the center puts it, special experiences await.

Marry in the Planetarium on a spotlit stage beneath a 70-foot dome of night sky studded with stars, while guests gaze in comfortable tiered seats. Or, choose the Observatory Complex with fresh air and gorgeous views of the sunset over the surrounding redwoods.

Some packages include star-gazing through the center’s three historical telescopes. The observatory seats 175, the amphitheater seats 130 guests,

the planetarium seats up to 241, and Astronomy Hall accommodates up to 250.

The center also o ers “miniwedding” packages, including a onehour Planetarium ceremony and Planetarium show for 50 people, or a

two-hour Observation Deck ceremony and one-hour private telescope viewing for 30.

Chabot Space and Science Center, 10000 Skyline Blvd., Oakland. 510-3367300, rentals@ChabotSpace.org, www. chabotspace.org/visit/rent-chabot/ weddings-private-events/ «

PHOTO COURTESY OF CHABOT SPACE AND SCIENCE CENTER

STARRY EYED Couples-to-be can take their special event to another dimension, exploring the night sky through Chabot’s historic telescopes.

– EMILY WEBSTER

» The Wedding on the Water

BERKELEY WEDDINGS ON THE WATER

Perhaps you’d like to cruise happily into married life. Then “Berkeley Weddings on the Water,” offered by City Cruises, can make that dream come true aboard one of their three vessels, the Empress Hornblower (capacity 250), the Pacific Hornblower (capacity 120) or the Sunset Hornblower (capacity 100).

City Cruises will custom design an event for you, with chef-created menus, and a team of wedding professionals in all-inclusive packages. Glowing views of both the East Bay and San Francisco will be the backdrop for your floating reception.

The “Elegant Ceremony” package includes the captain presiding. Follow this with a Silver, Gold or Platinum Wedding Reception package. Also offered is the “Sweet & Simple” Ceremony for anyone wanting no frills—but there is an extensive list

of possible enhancements for those wanting a treasure chest of frills.

City Cruises/Berkeley Weddings on the Water. 800-668-4322, www. cityexperiences.com/berkeley/city-cruises/ ceremonies-receptions

The Intimate Wedding

EAST BROTHER LIGHT STATION, RICHMOND

If your wedding party is limited to 40 people or less, and you are planning at least nine months in advance, how about getting married on an island—a local island?

Richmond’s East Brother Light Station, a beautifully restored California Victorian, an active lighthouse since 1873, is now a B&B, perched atop an island in the strait that separates San Francisco and San Pablo bays. Guests are treated to spectacular views of the San Francisco skyline, Mount Tamalpais and the Marin coastline.

It’s possible to rent all five rooms at the Light Station for the bridal couple

and a few guests, and the wedding meal can be catered by the inn, but again, planning far in advance is essential.

Other things to keep in mind: The journey to the dock where boats ferry guests back and forth is over a winding, narrow road. Boat capacity for each trip is only six guests at a time, so there is a 20-minute wait between trips. The Light Station does not like to do night ferrying, so non-overnight guests need to be ferried back before nightfall. For the right wedding, though, this is a dream choice.

East Brother Light Station, 1900 Stenmark Dr., Richmond. 510-233-2985, www.ebls.org

There are no cookie-cutter weddings here. ‘Every single client wants something different.’

The Great East Bay Bake O

Wedding and specialty cakes for the win

Aparty without cake is just a meeting,” Julia Child purportedly said, and we’d have to agree. Allow us to present the following confectionary options in the East Bay for your next big gathering or special day.

Two Chicks in the Mix

Two high school besties started this conscientious bakery over a decade ago, now with two locations. Their Alameda outpost sources ingredients from the Temescal Farmers’ Market and Oaktown Spice Shop, with the duo committed to “preserve and protect our environmental and social »

CAKE LIFE We want s’more of what Malaka Wilson-Greene and Erica Freeman are baking.

ecosystems.” All manner of baked goods are on display; wedding cake flavors include lemon olive oil with French lemon curd, lavender Earl Grey and honey, funfetti and s’more, among others.

2400 Monarch St., Alameda, 510.213.8542, www.twochicksinthemix.com.

Full Belly Bakery

A designer cake studio based in Oakland, Full Belly Bakery specializes in made-to-order cakes for birthdays, showers, weddings and more. Signature cakes include strawberry vanilla, triple chocolate, citron, mixed berry and caramel pecan carrot, in sizes from cake jar to multi-tiered. Contact them at least two days before your party or a month before your wedding—longer if during the holidays. Curbside pickup or delivery available.

1014 Fruitvale Ave., Oakland, 510.214.2507, www.fullbellybakery.com.

East Bay Cakes

All the usual milestones can be made better by boozy cakes, cake pops, push-up pops and all manner of fanciful offerings at this “by order only” Pittsburg bakery. Need a fourtiered castle cake for your niece’s quinceanera? A Batman-SupermanSpiderman cake for your 50th? Perhaps an elegantly sculpted bridal dress cake topped with pearls for your engagement party? Expert baker Sandra Forrester has you covered.

1560 Norine Dr., Pittsburg, 925.354.5404, www.eastbaycakes.com.

ANTIQUE VIBES Whimsy and elegance with layers of buttercream and sponge cake.

Natty Cakes

Specializing in uniquely flavored buttercream cakes baked in a certified home kitchen in Emeryville, Natty Cakes doesn’t skimp on design. Decor flourishes like pressed flowers, marbled or ombre frosting and gold leaf details add sophistication to your edible centerpiece. A kintsugi cake, based on the ancient Japanese art of mending broken pottery with powdered gold lacquer, stuns and delights. Vegan or gluten-free options available.

2940 Seventh St., Berkeley, 604.644.7145, www.lovenattycakes.com.

Lavender Bakery and Cafe

European-inspired cakes and pastries await at this new Albany favorite, with two sister bakeries in Silicon Valley Known for their burnt almond cake with Amaretto custard filling, as well as mousses and tarts galore, Lavender Bakery provides an array of filling and frosting choices for your custom artisanal cake, along with a color palette akin to what you’d find at a paint store.

1820 Solano Ave., Berkeley, 510.982.2318, lavenderbakeries.com.

PHOTO COURTESY OF NATTY CAKES

California love and timeless country from Oakland’s

Laura Benitez and The Heartache

ROCK ’N TWANG

TWANG

COUNTRY LEGENDS “I loved the perspective of artists like Dolly Parton, Loretta Lynn and Gillian Welch and fell in love with the music,” Benitez said.

The songs on California Centuries, the latest album from Laura Benitez and The Heartache, developed slowly over the last few years. “I love California,” Benitez said from her Oakland home. “It’s the best place in the world. The last three years have seemed like centuries, but the title’s also a nod to the timelessness that I aim for in my songs.

long-distance cyclist—a randonneur. When you ride 100 miles, they call it a century.”

“It's a tribute to my partner, Bryan Kilgore, as well. He’s a non-competitive,

The album has a larger-thanlife sound, with bedrock rhythms complimented by washes of steel guitar and reverberating electric guitars that take up an immense sonic space. It opens with “Bad Things,” a rocker with a solid groove and sinister steel guitar fills, supporting Benitez as she describes the anxiety caused by the COVID lockdown and California’s wildfires.

BY j.poet »

PHOTO BY EMILY SEVIN

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“All Songs” is a lullaby, with a realistic lyric that balances the comfort of parental love with the realities of life’s limitations. Benitez croons softly, while the steel guitar sighs in the background. “On Sept. 9, 2020, the day the sky turned orange, it felt a little apocalyptic. At the same time, I’m with my nine-month-old child, who is full of wonder and delight. The song’s reconciling those two realities. I was lullabying myself, as well as my child.”

“God Willing and the Creek Don’t Rise” is a bluegrass rave up, with Dobro mimicking the sound of a banjo, while “Gaslight (We Shouldn’t Talk About It)” addresses America’s addiction to guns and violence, with a loping country beat. Benitez assumes a male persona in the last verse, to offer excuses for inexcusable behavior. “That voice is based on comments on a Facebook thread,” Benitez explained. “I know Trump speaks that way, but I was thinking about men I’ve directly encountered.”

“I moved to LA and got a few jobs, but you can’t act until you have a job,

and that depends on other people. It’s not like music, where you can sing in your backyard, or on the street, or anywhere you want to. I moved back to Oakland and started singing with a country cover band. I loved the perspective of artists like Dolly Parton, Loretta Lynn and Gillian Welch and fell in love with the music. About 10 years ago, I thought I’d try songwriting. After I wrote three or four, I liked what I was doing and I kept going.”

She quit the cover band and started thinking about performing her own tunes. “I recorded my first album, For Duty or for Love, almost as a demo. I managed myself and I needed a way to book shows. It seemed like having a recording would be a way to do that. The first version of The Heartache was Michele Kappel drums, Bob Spector on guitar, Ted O'Connell on bass and steel player Ian Sutton. They also recorded and toured with me for my second album, Heartless Woman, in 2014.”

Since then, the band has been through more personnel shifts. The core band for California Centuries included Spector on guitar, Russell Kiel on bass, drummer Steve Pearson, Sutton on steel guitar and Dobro, and a few special guests. Now, with things opening up again, Benitiz is ready to start playing live.

“After all the stops and starts of the last few years, I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to gig regularly. Some shows got canceled, and everyone in the band had different feelings about what gigs were safe to play. Right now, it feels a bit like that scene from Forrest Gump, when after the hurricane, his shrimp boat is the only one left. That’s how it feels to still have a band after a pandemic.”

You can see Laura Benitez and The Heartache on Saturday, Dec. 3 at The Mystic Theater, Avery (mystictheater. com); Saturday, Dec. 11 at The Torch Club, 904 15th St., Sacramento (thetorchclub.net); and Wednesday, Jan. 11 at The Hotel Utah Saloon, 500 4th St., San Francisco (hotelutah.com).

‘The album has a larger-than-life sound, with bedrock rhythms complimented by washes of steel guitar and reverberating electric guitars that take up an immense sonic space.’

Bistro Noir

Prohibition-era history and eclectic Parisian romance at the Rendez-Vous cocktail bar in Oakland

BY Jeffrey Edalatpour

Recently, I sat down at Rendez-Vous Café

Bistro, right next door to the Albany Twin movie theater. When the host said they’d been in business for nearly 20 years, it dawned on me that my robot-car-map machine had misled me. I’d intended to try The Rendez-Vous, a new Frenchified boîte on the other side of Temescal.

A friend of mine had recommended it by sending enticing photos of lovely dark green booths and newly revealed frescoes from the 1930s. I sheepishly left Albany that day to subsequently make my way to the correct address on Martin Luther King Jr. Way.

An early post on The Rendez-Vous’ Instagram account surmises that the 1910 building was “a private member’s social club during prohibition and was

SQUID GAME The heavily charred cephalopod came with peppers and kiwi, along with hunks of avocado.

a cocktail lounge called Jax Club for a couple of decades.” Over the years, the post adds, the space has also housed a florist, a record store, a barber shop and stored car parts. The transformation of the interior is a complete departure from those utilitarian businesses.

The Rendez-Vous captures the spirit of a Parisian restaurant in a venue that embodies the original idea of shabby chic. The mood cast inside is of a »

PHOTO COURTESY OF JANELLE HESSIG

Art by Scott Laperruque

Off-duty espionage agents and ill-fated lovers could meet there and feel right at home sipping a strawberry-infused whiskey sour.

fin de siècle decay, thanks to the layers of peeling paint and the series of partially rescued frescoes. One of the loveliest recovered murals features a topless dancer, her head and her blouse missing. But she’s wearing a pair of sheer billowing harem pants, jewelgreen in color. Painted against a field of blue tile, she’s posed, mid-dance, with one heel in motion.

Outside on the back patio, there's a red neon sign in the shape of a heart. The overall effect of the décor is hypnotizing, transportive and cinematic. Off-duty espionage agents and ill-fated lovers could meet there and feel right at home sipping a strawberry-infused whiskey sour, just one of many inventive cocktails on the menu.

When I walked inside, the architectural layout reminded me of eating at Doña Tomás, way back when it was one of the first restaurants that made Temescal a culinary destination. There are few pedestrians walking along the stretch of MLK Way where The Rendez-Vous is located. BART

trains travel overhead, while cars race towards the 580, Berkeley or downtown Oakland.

The hand-drawn menu and sign out front above the doorway contribute to the feeling that you’re dining out in someone’s particular fantasy. It seems an off-the-beaten path oasis serving potent, yet restorative potables and tasty meals that supplement them. The drinks are served in charming mismatched glasses and the food eaten with antique silverware.

A bowl of green olives ($12) bettered their usual, casual presentation. The chef slices them, adds chunks of feta cheese and oregano, and then bathes the ingredients in a golden olive oil. We used thin slices of crostini, cut from baguettes, to scoop the mixture up. The Caesar Salade ($16) convinced me, once again, that I’ve grown to like bitter lettuces. Radicchio tastes vaguely poisonous—something Snow White’s stepmother might enjoy—but was complemented by much sweeter little gem leaves.

My friend recognized two dishes on the menu from her previous visit, but the presentation of both was different from what she remembered. The squid ($22) that arrived didn’t match the menu’s description. Instead of stone fruit, the heavily charred cephalopod came with peppers and kiwi, along with hunks of avocado. Adorned with microgreens, the plate was pretty, but the mélange of fruit and veggies didn’t gel well. The textures all landed as soft on soft on soft beneath a kosho vinaigrette. But I could see the potential of the dish if it were accompanied by heartier sides such as squash, potatoes or asparagus.

We tried both desserts. First was a vanilla bean custard ($12) with a cassis “drizzle” that was more of a drenching. It was a comforting version of a pudding without being overly sweet. Next was a dense chocolate cake ($12) that tasted flourless. When we left the table, the plate was empty, dotted with a few tiny crumbs.

The Rendez-Vous, open Wed to Sun 5–11pm. 5526 Martin Luther King Jr. Way, Oakland. instagram.com/therendezvousoakland.

Engaging and eclectic in the East Bay.

Adams Point just steps away from Lake Merritt, St. Paul’s Towers offers

views and easy access to the best of the East Bay and beyond.

a mid-century modern architectural gem, you can bask in the light of floor to ceiling

that open to private balconies in every apartment. Enjoy community spaces or the neighborhood that offer opportunities for walking around the lake, digging in the garden, socializing with friends, discussing the news or following an old or untapped artistic talent. Whatever your passion, we have what it takes to make you feel at home and more.

100 Bay Place Oakland, CA 94610