The FAMILY Magazine August 2012 by FAMILY Magazines of Michiana

Complimentary • Priceless • Free

Family Reunions

Why They Matter

Back to School: De-Cluttering With a Purpose After-School Activities: The good, the Bad and the Insanely Busy Kid Stages We Could Do Without Making Face Time a Family Priority Serving: Granger • Mishawaka • Elkhart • South Bend • Goshen • Niles • Edwardsburg • Middlebury • Plymouth • St. Joseph • New Buffalo & Surrounding Communities

Every woman needs a mammogram For those over 40 and uninsured, there is help Lakeland HealthCare and Susan G. Komen For the Cure – Southwest Michigan are providing 100 free breast cancer screenings for women in Berrien, Cass, and Van Buren counties. Call (269) 556-2866 to learn more about the Compassion Card Program Check with your doctor or search “mammogram” on Lakeland’s health encyclopedia at www.lakelandhealth.org to find out when you should get your mammogram

Working Together for a Healthier Community!

www.lakelandhealth.org

Congratulations! To the talented March Coloring Winners.

Contributors Publisher & Editor-in-Chief:

Betsy Tavernier Betsy@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com EXECUTIVE Editor: Kerri Hagens Kerri@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com FAMILY MAGAZINES Advertising Account Manager: Jessica Marietta Jessica@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com Creative Director: Jena Bontrager Jena@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com GRAPHIC DESIGNER: Zuzanna Zmud Zuzanna@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com GRAPHIC DESIGN INTERN: Katie Brenneman Katie@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com Fashion Editor: Kathy Friend Kathy@MMProd.com

Isabella – Age 6p Angelina – Age 1 0 u Courtney – Age 3 q

Medical Editor: S. Jesse Hsieh, M.D. Distribution Managers: Richard Cox – St. Joseph, Cass & Berrien Counties John Ferguson Michiana Family Magazines would love to hear from you! Please submit press releases, event information and inquiries to: Media@Michianafamilymagazine.com The FAMILY Magazines 1233 E. University Drive Granger, IN 46530 PH: 574.387.5420 (3261) • FX: 574.217.4700 www.michianafamilymagazine.com The FAMILY Magazines August 2012 Established in 2006. All rights reserved. Permission from the publisher is required for any reproduction or reprint of this publication. Read The FAMILY Magazines online each month! Go to www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com and flip the pages, cover-to-cover the organic and green way!

IN THE NEXT ISSUE:

Volume 6: Number 8

Charities • Local Businesses Who Give Back

If you would like your business and/or service to be included in the next issue, call The FAMILY Magazines at 574.293.FAM1 (3261) to reserve your space. Space is limited. on the cover: The Osei Family of Goshen

www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

Photography: Classic Image Photography, Granger

The FAMILY Magazine is a proud member of PMA

Please use the information compiled by Michiana Family Magazines for your research. Michiana Family Magazines recommends that parents and families interview each business or organization to make sure that it is safe and a good fit for your family. The information presented here and provided by Michiana Family Magazines is for informational purposes only and although every effort has been made to present accurate information, Michiana Family Magazines does not, in any way, accept responsibility for the accuracy of or consequences from the use of this information and/or for the businesses and organizations presented herein. We urge all parents and families to confirm any information given herein through additional research. The views and opinions expressed by the writers, event organizers and advertisers do not necessarily represent those of Michiana Family Magazines LLC, its officers, editors, staff or contributors.

FROM THE PUBLISHER

Things We (at FAMILY)

Do What You Say... ...you are going to do. Always. How many times have you had great intentions and then something threw a monkey wrench into your plans and you failed on what you said you were going to do? This often results in excuses, apologies, regrets and simply feels just bad, bad, bad. Not doing what you said you would do lessens one’s credibility for sure. Right? Right.

Love

Right Now!

1. Sunflowers

The ones that really get me are the ones that don’t even try to give a lame excuse, explanation or apology ... this is just becoming the norm these days and I’m concerned. Oh, hi, election year! I digress.

2. Cool Breezes

Credibility, integrity, reliability. Would our kids describe us, as parents, with these words or feelings? hmmmm ...

4. The Morning News

My 10-year old recently busted me when I dropped the ball and didn’t do what I said I would do. I was to make a simple phone call about something for him, which I promised I’d do, and I failed. When he asked me about it, I quickly said, “Oh, buddy, I’m sorry, I got busy and I didn’t do it. I’ll do that tonight.” And, he said, “Mom, you said that yesterday!” It stopped me in my tracks. He was right and he busted me. Now, this seems simple and common but I got to thinking how huge it really is. What am I teaching my kids about doing what I said I would do, keeping my word and being responsible. I did own it by saying I was sorry but I don’t think he quite believed me. He’s heard me say that many times before too.

3. Long Days

5. Win/Win Business Partnerships 6. Learning Something New 7. Silver Thong Sandals 8. Family Ice Cream Night 9. Prayers

Doing what you say you will do applies everywhere, to all things. I used to have to ask prospective employees that I was considering for employment that very question in a canned interview questionnaire which was required by my employer: How often will you do what you say you will do? My boss and the pros above me told me to never hire a candidate that didn’t answer that question with “Always!”.

10. Pistachio Dessert

So, my hot button for this truly hot summer is cooling down as I am trying much harder to do what I said I would do. I like to under-promise and then over-deliver lately and it is working for me. I certainly have far less excuses, apologies and regrets - but I’m still a work in progress ...

13. Quick Wit

11. Baby Fawns with Spots 12. Funny Commercials

14. Thoughtful and loyal co-workers (Special thanks to my great staff/magazine team!)

Do what you say you will do. Integrity is such an important characteristic to display as our kids are watching and learning. Enjoy this back-to-school month with your kiddos!

Check it Out!

Betsy & Family

Don’t forget to pick up your copy of the NEW SASSY Magazine! For your Find the enjoyment and fun! Hidden Acorn!

Want the "organic"/green version of The FAMILY Magazine each month with bonus articles? Sign up for our Email Newsletter on our website and get your own organic copy delivered to your email inbox each month!

AUGUST 2012 § SEPTEMBER

NO6

CONSULT THE

JEAN GENIE!

OUR FASHIONABLE KICKOFF TO

TAILGATE SEASON

SEVEN WIDELY ACCEPTED MAKEUP TIPS YOU SHOULD

IGNORE

2012

The FAMILY Magazine: Live Your Best:

SPECIAL FAMILY FEATURES

8 The FAMILY Month Calendar

22 No More School’s-Almost-Here Zombie Eyes

5 Find the Acorn Contest

Kids Book Review: 10 Diary of a Wimpy Kid

Back to School

Taming the Jitters Before They Start By Michelle Wegner

Reviewed By Nicholas

24 Skipping the Dorm. Opting for Home.

Book Review:

By Stephanie J. Salisbury

10 Ninety Days: A Memoir of Recovery Reviewed by Lynell Wolff

11 Death Cloud (Sherlock Holmes: The Legend Begins) Reviewed by Margo Ferguson

Family Matters: 14 It’s Your Cup of Tea By Evelyn Kirkwood

16 Family Reunions Why They Matter By Marcy Blesy

Family Boomers: 18 Mindfullness

A Free (But Priceless) Tool for All Caregivers

Insights to Help You and Your At-Home College Freshman Make the Transition

26 Back-to-School:De-Cluttering with a Purpose

Thanks to Goodwill, there are new benefits to getting organized this school year By Meagan Church

28 Art Smart

Making Art a Part of Your Family’s Life By Sarah Martin

34 Back-To-School Trends The 80’s Are Back! By Kathy Friend

36 After School Activities

The Good, the Bad and the Insanely Busy By Stephanie Graham

By Mary Carroll

20 The Osei Family By Chelle Costello

Calendar of Events:

38 Go to www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com for tons of additional family events – updated daily!

MiChild:

Special Parenting Resource Section

Story Time:

44 Sporty Reads For Your Little Ones!

Reviewed by Vicky Westphal and Tina Emerick

MiCorner:

45 Tips to Build Your Childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Vocabulary

Mommy & Daddy: 46 Swimming Lessons By Jane Suter

Parenting:

48 Kid Stages We Could Do Without By Meagan Francis

Big Kids: 26

50 Making Face Time a Family Priority By Amy Allen Clark

Play Dates: 52 Dates

live your best

The FAMILY Month Calendar 5

On the River Festival on the St. Joe River, South Bend

International Friendship Day!

St. Joseph County Night Out Against Crime

International Left-Handers Day

2nd Annual Toscana Park Summer Wine & Art Festival, Toscana Park in Granger

August is National Immunization Awareness Month This awareness month calls attention to the importance of improving immunization coverage and encourages the community to get immunized to help prevent the spread of infectious diseases. It’s a great reminder with back-to-school coming up this month! Be sure your children are up-to-date and are scheduled to get their back-toschool physicals!

records together. Schedule sports physicals, and update any shots.

Quotes to Share With Friends In celebration of International Friendship Day this month, here are some words of wisdom and inspiration about the nature of friendship: “A friend is one who knows you and loves you just the same.” ~Elbert Hubbard

Write a Letter While you might be an avid Facebooker, we challenge you to do something rather unprecedented this month. Grab a pen and paper, sit down and write a letter. Yes, it might seem archaic, but that extra time and effort to personally write a note of appreciation, thanks or encouragement, will make your friend’s day. Trust us. Who doesn’t love getting something other than a bill in the mail! Get Organized! Rita Walt, an experienced teacher and dedicated parent, has some great advice to help you get and stay organized this school year. Here’s a checklist of suggestions to get you started! • Family calendar posted in a central location: Assign each family member a different color to keep organized. • Daily schedules and chores: You can color code this as well. Rita posts this chart on the refrigerator. As the chore was completed, a check mark was placed on the chart. • Baskets by back door: Rita has two baskets by the back door. Each night, items needed for the next day – uniforms, briefcases, book bags, etc. – are placed in the baskets. • Medical information: Get your immunization

Ship N Shore, New Buffalo

Empty That Drawer! Before the first day of school, go to that drawer where you’ve been hoarding all your kids school and art work from the previous year. Decide what is important to keep and get rid of the rest. (Note: To learn the best way to do this, check out Sarah Martin’s article entitled “ArtSmart” which is in this issue!) Famous Left-Handed People Who knew? There’s an International LeftHanders Day in August! So to celebrate this most hallowed day, here are a few famous people who are believed to be lefties. Bill Clinton Napoléon Bonaparte Lewis Carroll H.G. Wells Jimi Hendrix Paul McCartney

“A friendship can weather most things and thrive in thin soil; but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often – just to save it from drying out completely.” ~Pam Brown “Friends and good manners will carry you where money won’t go.” ~Margaret Walker

I Have a Dream On August 28, 1963, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his famous and inspirational “I Have a Dream” speech on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C.: “I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.’”

Hawaii becomes our 50th state, 1959

Mount Vesuvius Erupts, 79 A.D.

Running Wild: 5K Trail Run & 3K Fun Walk, St. Patrick’s County Park

Michiana Renaissance Festival

Fabulous Events St. Joseph County Night Out Against Crime This is a free event open to the public and will be held Tuesday, August 7 at Ferrettie/ Baugo Creek County Park, Osceola. See demonstrations by the St. Joseph County Police Department divisions, including K-9 and SWAT. Visit booths of local organizations and businesses to learn about the resources in the community. Free food and beverages, children’s carnival rides, fingerprint kits, and safety information. Many giveaways and drawings for prizes! Organized and sponsored by St. Joseph County Police Department. From 5:30 to 8:30 PM. For more info, visit sjcparks.org. On the River On August 3 and 4, head on over to Colfax Ave on the St. Joe River, South Bend. Each summer a group of young professionals take a vacant downtown lot and transform it into a full-fledged beach-themed venue, complete with 2,000 tons of sand, tiki huts, real palm trees and more. The event boasts three distinct parts: Teen Night, Family Day and the ever-popular 21+ Beach Bash. Enjoy activities like live entertainment, food, fireworks and volleyball. Cost is $5-15. Visit ontheriverfest.com for advance discount tickets and more information.

22 M

23 Tu

Good Morning, Waffles! Mother extraordinaire, Amy Allen Clark of momadvice. com, has a killer recipe for a great batch of waffles. Surprise your family one morning using this recipe! Oatmeal Cookie Waffles 4 cups quick oats (grind the oats in your food processor or blender until it is a fine powder) 1 cup all-purpose flour 2 teaspoons salt 3 cups milk (you can use prepared powdered milk) 2 tablespoons baking powder 2 beaten eggs 2 tablespoons molasses 4 tablespoons canola oil 2 teaspoons vanilla 2 teaspoons cinnamon 1/4 cup sugar

Congrats to The Penn High School Academic Super Bowl Social Studies Team In one of the closest finishes in state finals history, the Penn High School Academic Super BowlSocial Studies team won its third straight state crown on Saturday, May 5, edging out Orleans and Jac-Cen-Del for the overall crown at Purdue University’s Loeb Auditorium in West Lafayette. For Penn, in addition to being their third straight state title, it was also the 9th crown in the past 14 years and the 11th title since 1996. Pictured left to right: Caitlyn Chase, Sarah McGinness, Chris Mitchell, Phillip Weldy, Tim Liu, Ajith John, Katie Bauschka, Victoria Humphreys and coach Pete DeKever

Mix all ingredients together until there are no lumps. Pour batter into well-greased waffle iron and allow each waffle to cook 4 minutes. Serve immediately. Note: If you make the batter ahead of time, be sure to add milk to thin it out. Viggle For all you TV junkies out there, download Viggle, an app for iPhone, iPad, iPod touch and Android devices. Viggle is a loyalty program that actually rewards you for watching TV! The app automatically identifies what television shows its users are watching and awards them points when they check-in. Viggle users can redeem their points in the app’s rewards catalogue for items such as movie tickets, music, gift cards and much more. We love it! For more information, follow Viggle on Twitter @Viggle or like Viggle on Facebook.

live your book reviews best

Diary of a Wimpy Kid By Jeff Kinney

Reviewed by Nicholas Do you want to know an amazing book that you should read? Well, you should read “Diary of a Wimpy Kid.” The book is about a child that is in middle school and has funny experiences any other teenager would have. I like this story because this is mostly how any other teenage boy’s life would be. This book is great for the whole family to read. Greg Heffley is the main character in this book. Greg is basically just a huge trouble maker that does not like his brothers and thinks his parents are weird. There are a lot of funny moments in the book, like when Greg’s mom makes him participate in a school play and terror happens. The book also follows Greg as he tries to weight up so he can be in the same weight class as Rowley in wrestling. Greg’s best friend is Rowley Jefferson, who is a big goofball and likes to hang out with Greg all the time. I recommend this book because it is going to make you laugh, and you’re going to love it. “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” is also a good bedtime story for kids and is great for all ages. If your kid does not like to read, then this is the perfect story because this is one hilarious book.

My name is Nicholas and “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” is my favorite book. Basketball and football are my favorite sports, and I am in seventh grade. I earn the honor roll every year for my school. The best thing you should know about me is I love the Indianapolis Colts.

Ninety Days: A Memoir of Recovery By Bill Clegg

Reviewed by Lynell Wolff Reference Librarian Harris Branch of the Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Public Library “Ninety Days: A Memoir of Recovery” by Bill Clegg is the sequel to his 2010 national best seller “Portrait of an Addict as a Young Man.” His new title refers to the goal of ninety consecutive clean and sober days to loosen the hold of an addiction. But, as Clegg so urgently writes, an addict will not make it alone. His first sponsor reminds him continually to “stay close.” After five years in recovery, Clegg reminds others and continues to be reminded that everyone in recovery needs to stay close – close to those who count the days they are clean in days, months or years. “Ninety Days” is written like a journal, chronologically sharing what happens almost every day, but the pace is not slow. It is painful to read about someone trying so hard and yet at times failing. It is also painful to see the difficult decisions being made by those who truly care about Clegg but turn away from him. Addiction memoirs might be overlooked by most readers, but my curiosity led me to the question: what did he learn in recovery? After reading “Ninety Days” I also wanted to see if the author just caught the coattails of his earlier success or if the new title has substantially new content – it does. In “Ninety Days” Clegg shares openly the financial pit he has dug for himself when his addiction caused the loss of job, friends and everything connected. Clegg’s book should give new hope to those who have a loved one struggling with addiction and may even encourage those who have taken the first steps toward recovery.

live best bookyour reviews

Death Cloud (Sherlock Holmes: The Legend Begins) By Andrew Lane

Reviewed by Margo Ferguson Young Adult Librarian Bittersweet Branch of the Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Public Library For someone who has not read any of the mysteries, this book is a great introduction to the Sherlock Holmes character. It is also a wonderful new story for those who are Sherlock Holmes fans and who want more to read. The book starts in the summer of 1868 at the end of a school term. Sherlock is 14 years old and is looking forward to spending the break at his family’s home. He is surprised when his older brother, Mycroft, arrives to pick him up in the family carriage. Mycroft explains that their father’s regiment has been sent to India. Sherlock will be spending the summer with an aunt and uncle he has never met. Mycroft has just started his new job with the foreign office and is working long hours. Mycroft also believes he would not “be a fit guardian for a boy, especially an inquisitive one.” Sherlock arrives and gets settled into his new home, thinking his summer will be boring and the boarding school he is attending is actually starting to look better. His mood improves when he meets a friend, Marty Arnatt, who lives on a narrowboat on the canal and appears to be close to his age. Life is starting to look better until Mycroft hires a tutor so Sherlock can continue his studies during the summer. To his surprise, the tutor, Amyus Crowe, is a most interesting individual and comes from the territory of New Mexico. Crowe is the one who encourages Sherlock to think in the manner we are accustomed to in stories by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Soon Sherlock has reason to use all the deducting powers he possesses. He discovers a dead body on his Uncle’s estate and starts investigating the cause of death with the assistance of Mr. Crowe. It turns out this is the second death of this sort. During the investigation Sherlock gets trapped in a burning building, becomes an unwilling participant in a violent boxing match, gets kidnapped more than once and ends up in France. “Death Cloud” has a lot of action as Sherlock Holmes – with the help of his new friends –investigates the mystery. The book is so much more than simply figuring out why and how the men died. Will you be able to sort through the clues that enable you to solve the puzzle, or will you miss it? I highly recommend this book for all Sherlock Holmes fans and for readers who enjoy a great mystery. The School Library Journal recommends the book for students in the 6th to 9th grade. I would not have stopped the recommendation at 9th grade. I think this is a great read for all who enjoy a good mystery! Also worthy of note: The book is the first teen series endorsed by the Conan Doyle Estate.

Been tracking this jack rabbit all afternoon for the #michmag. This is as close as he'd let me get. Tricksy rabbit! ~ ellewhite7

Today was a perfect day to ride with your head sticking out of the window. ~ tishamattei Rainy Sunday. ~ momadvice

Use Instagram, a fun photo editing and sharing app for the iPhone, to show us what you see around town and what your family and friends are up to. Your photos may make an upcoming issue! Include the hashtag #michmag in your photo captions, and follow us on Instagram too: thefamilymag.

~justashleigh

Great day to enjoy Silver Beach! ~ ashley49031

Cuddling sisters. ~ meaganchurch

Sookie wanted some attention. ~ heatherbelle654

Best buds. ~torilg82

Macro Mantis. ~ michellewegner

~courtneyekema

Find out what your artwork, antique or garage sale find is worth.

The Heritage Road Show Saturday, Aug. 18 10 AM - 2 PM The Center for History 808 W. Washington St. South Bend www.CenterForHistory.org

Heritage Square www.shopheritagesquare.com Guest Services: 574.855.3774

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family matters

It’s YOUR Cup of Tea By Evelyn Kirkwood

It can be as simple as dropping a few spearmint leaves in your sun tea jar, or as complex as mixing dried flowers to steep in your favorite tea cup. Shelley Chaffee, leisure services assistant supervisor at St. Joseph County Parks, has taught workshops on making herbal teas with plants often found in backyard gardens. “If you have any sort of herb garden, chances are some of the plants growing there can be used to make tea,” she says. She likes creating homemade herbal teas because they have no caffeine, are inexpensive and fun to try. Rose hip, chamomile and anise hyssop are just a few examples of easy-to-make teas if you have access to the plants. Shelley says one flower that is plentiful now is Echinacea, or purple coneflower. She brews the tea by steeping a handful of the flower heads in boiling water and straining it into a mug. Natural remedy enthusiasts say this plant helps combat colds. Another plant flowering now is bee balm or Monarda. Depending on the variety, it has pale lavender to bright red flowers. The leaves and flowers make an aromatic tea with a hint of citrus. If they aren’t already growing in your garden, search farm markets for fresh spearmint and lemon balm. Both make excellent teas. Shelley has steeped tea using fresh and dried plants. “An advantage to drying the plants is that you can save them to brew a steaming cup in winter,” she suggests. 14 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

To dry leaves and flowers, hang them in bundles in a cool place for several days. A single layer of plants on a baking sheet in an oven set on 125 degrees is also an option. “Line the baking sheet with parchment paper and crack the oven door to allow steam to escape,” she adds. Check the herbs every hour until dry. Many teas benefit from a touch of sweetener, and Shelley favors natural selections. Her dad, Don Dodd, is a maple syrup producer

in Niles. “Although most people don’t think of maple syrup in their tea, it can be a tasty addition,” she says. Honey or crushed berries are also flavorful and healthy choices.

artBeatSouthBenD.org

A few more tips from Shelley for best flavor: •Store your dried leaves and flowers whole, not crushed •Use them within a year •Keep them in an airtight container in a cool, dry place

Downtown South BenD

Making tea at home also allows you to experiment with different combinations at brewing time. Some of Shelley’s suggestions include the following: Chamomile and lemon balm, catnip and lemon balm, bee balm and mint, or lavender and chamomile. When making iced tea, you’ll get the best flavor from brewing hot tea, then pouring it over ice or chilling it.

Sat, auguSt 25 R a i n d at e S u n , a u g u S t 2 6

11 am - 6 pm

Ultimately, it’s your cup of tea; make it any way you like it!

Family Activity Your Cup of Tea

Gather 1 tablespoon or more of mint, lemon balm or Echinacea flowers and place in a tea strainer, (or use 1 teaspoon dried herb). Pour 8 ounces of boiling water over the herbs. Cover to prevent aromatic steam from escaping. Steep for 3-5 minutes. (A longer time produces a bitter tea.) For stronger tea, add more herbs. If making in a tea pot, use an extra spoon of herbs (this is called “one for the pot”).

Summer Quencher

For a cool summer thirst quencher, place several slices of cucumber in a pitcher of ice water. Add a handful of spearmint leaves and refrigerate. Pour into a glass. Add a few strawberries for color!

art

me BY e

on Se r

IV e aY r

32 Pearls T Conservative

Family Dentistry... Treating Patients Of All Ages

T Flexible

Hours

T Visit

Our Website For Information On Procedures Provided...

Evelyn Kirkwood is Director of St. Joseph County Parks in Indiana and host of Outdoor Elements which is broadcast Sundays at 9:00 a.m. on WNIT Public Television.

Like Us on Facebook! 32pearlsfamilydentistry.com

574.855.3829

15045 State Road 23 • Granger, IN 46530

“She has a smile that can light up a room.” - John Link Equipment Specialist

Avis L. Barker, D.M.D.

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family matters

Family Reunions Why They Matter

By Marcy Blesy

The Conley/

Wozniak Reu

Busy. Busy. Busy. It’s the American way, right? Cram as much as we can into one day, crawling into bed at night only to get up and do it all over again. Maybe that’s why we look forward to the slower pace of summer – the longer hours of sunlight, the steady cadence of crickets in the evening, the late night s’mores over a fire pit. Well, that’s what we’d like to envision, but truthfully, many families still micromanage the calendar with baseball games, swimming practice, basketball camp, art class, Boy Scout camp, you name it. Sound familiar? We are certainly guilty in our house. Many families are still trying to hold on to one summer tradition despite the ink on the calendar: family reunions. And this is one tradition that may just give your family the emotional boost they need to remind them what’s really important. Sue Hardy of Stevensville has been attending the Conley/ Wozniak family reunions for twenty years now. Relatives from both her mom and dad’s sides of the family meet at a local hotel every year coming from California, Florida, Georgia, New York, Virginia, Illinois and Michigan. “It started after my brother’s wife died. A cousin got him to come home for a weekend and surprise my folks. Some other relatives came, too, and that’s when we decided to start having family reunions,” she says. Jessica Tellez of Bridgman has been attending her husband Shawn’s family reunions for fifteen years, but her husband never remembers a time without the annual family get-together. Meeting in a local park, the families travel from Missouri, Arkansas, Colorado and Texas to join the Michigan relatives.

The Importance of Tradition

Robert Wagner, a licensed professional counselor in private practice and former middle school counselor in Bridgman, stresses the value of reunions. “Family gatherings anchor us in the past within which we have grown. As we connect with the voices and faces of earlier years, reunions give us an opportunity to connect deeply with who we’ve been. This might be through remembering family stories or reenacting old traditions – anything from giving of the grace for the meal (who gives it, the actual words spoken) to how the meal is served, what games are played afterwards, and so on.” 16 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

nion

Sue Hardy’s family revels in traditions that keep the reunions exciting and fresh. “We have started having a different theme each year with decorations, costumes and entertainment,” she says. Some of the themes have included crazy hats, Hawaiian, country-western, sports and ‘50s. “The Elvis impersonator we hired had so much fun at our reunion that he actually comes back every year just to hang out with our family,” says Hardy. Along with the fun of the theme and an annual cherry pit-spit contest, they also honor a special tradition by having a flag retirement ceremony where they burn an old United States flag and say what the flag means to them. “It can be very moving,” she says. For the Tellez family, they vote each year on the best dish from their potluck meal. “Each year’s winner signs and dates a chef ’s hat,” says Tellez, who has won for her brownies with cream cheese frosting topped with fresh fruit. Even just conversations can bring a sense of tradition. “Laughing and chatting about trees climbed, neighbors remembered and games played can anchor us quickly and deeply in the world from which we’ve grown,” says Wagner. “Reunions bring back to us old affections, even for those who might not be present.”

Avoiding Reunion Pitfalls

Planning a reunion is a lot of work, and people often have to make arrangements months in advance for calendar crunching. For the Tellez family, holding the reunion the same day every year helps it to be more successful. “I think being consistent helps. Our reunion is always held the first Sunday after the Fourth of July, so that makes it easy to remember year to year,” says Tellez. Hardy recommends sharing responsibilities, too. “It can be a lot of work to put it all together. We created a free website that has all the current year’s information plus pictures from previous years,” she says. Of course, while reunions are times for sharing the “good ‘ole days” and showing off new babies and new talents, there are likely to be old issues that may arise between family members that lead to conflict. Says Wagner, “The effect of all of those emotions and memories can have on us will be unpredictable at best. In addition, since many emotions tie into our youngest

years, the potential for regressing quickly, or acting childish, is tremendous. If old grievances are aired, old alliances are likely to reappear and thus increase the hurt feelings.” He recommends being aware of the conflict potential and to be sensitive to emotions. “Make specific plans to connect with the person in another time and setting to handle concerns thoroughly,” he suggests.

Why Reunions Matter

We all love a good story, right? What better venue from which to get a good story than at a family reunion? Trying to top themselves this year, the Conley/ Wozniak family is preparing for a circus theme. “My brother can come up with some pretty crazy ideas,” says Hardy. “This year, he was trying to rent an elephant for the day and give rides.” (But, alas, the elephant was booked. Who knew you could even do this in Michigan?) “What I remember most about these reunions is the fun times we’ve had and the times when we’ve been able to get all of my siblings and folks together,” says Hardy. Wagner adds, “Family gatherings provide a well supported place in which to repair broken or injured ties with others, giving a genuine “second chance” for moments of questionable wisdom. These gatherings also can provide a valuable multi-generational experience.” Tellez seconds the value of the family reunion being felt across the generations. “Shawn’s grandma had been sick with cancer that had spread throughout her body. She said that her dying wish was for the whole church pews to be filled with her family. So the morning before the reunion, we all went to church and filled almost every pew and then headed over to the family reunion. That year had the most people in attendance. His grandma was so happy and overwhelmed with joy. She passed away just two weeks later.” Yes, my calendar is booked, solid. But I’m making time. That family reunion in Illinois that we missed last year because of baseball won’t be missed this year. I’m reminded of the importance of family bonds. We will be there. Won’t you consider your plans, too? Marcy Blesy is a mother, teacher, and freelance writer. She is the author of the upcoming picture book “Am I Like My Daddy?” which will be published in fall 2012.

LEARNING TO BE FRIENDS & SCHOLARS Busy Bees Preschool

We help toddlers become kindergarten-ready in a playful and safe way. Remember, this is the only area program that includes Swim and Gymnastics lessons. > > > >

Registration ALWAYS open! Half-Day and Full-Day 2, 3 or 5 days a week September 5 through May 24

Enroll now for Fall Youth Sports programs beginning August 25! YMCA OF ELKHART COUNTY, INC. 200 E Jackson Bl. (P) 574 389 7878 (W) www.elkhartymca.org

ATHLETIC DEVELOPMENT FOR ALL SPORTS Students

as young as 1 1/2 years old

Progressive Small

program from recreation to competition

class sizes

Birthday

parties

Martial

Arts

Zumba

(kids/adults)

3390 N. HOME STREET  MISHAWAKA  574.256.0502  GYMMICHIANA.COM THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family boomers

Mindfulness “ ” A Free (But Priceless) Tool for All Caregivers

By Mary Carroll

People forget what you said. People forget what you did. But people never forget how you made them feel. ~Maya Angelou

Are you a caregiver and notice that you are feeling overwhelmed, depressed and physically sick more and more often? Do you feel like you are on a roller coaster with a blindfold on – not knowing what is coming next? Caregiver stress and burnout is a significant and wide spread issue today. Many of us are caring for our own family members with whom we live, but we are also faced with having to care for other members of our families and friends who need more assistance as they age. When providing care for others, there is constant change that is often impossible to foresee and plan for. Caring for those you love can last years and can cause problems for your own personal health as well as negatively impact the quality of care you provide to your loved ones. Although there are many tools that can be used to help us through this time, mindfulness is a wonderful skill that each of us can learn and utilize during times of stress and frustration, but also can be used in our daily lives.

What is Mindfulness?

The basic idea behind mindfulness is living your life in the here and now. In his book, “Mindfulness For Beginners,” Jon Kabat-Zinn writes, “Mindfulness is what arises when you pay attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally, and as your life depended on it.” The practice of mindfulness is focused on slowing down and connecting with ourselves and with those we are caring for. Transforming our attention to the present instead of focusing on past hurts, negativity and the unfairness of our situation redirects the focus from living in the past to living in the present. Mindfulness helps us grow in our compassion for others, but also in our forgiveness for ourselves and those in our lives. It helps us reduce our reactive tendencies during stressful and emotional times and helps improve patience and understanding for ourselves and for others.

How is Mindfulness Helpful for a Caregiver?

According to the website mindfulnet.org, “The benefits of mindfulness include helping individuals to recognize, slow down or stop automatic and habitual reactions, respond more effectively to complex or difficult situations, see situations more clearly, become more creative, and achieve balance and resilience at work and at home.” Many times when we are in caregiving mode, we are focused on what we may have done wrong and what we could have done better. Also, we may find ourselves focusing on what may happen in the future if the person continues to decline and needs more assistance than we can provide. We are often practicing mindlessness due to being overwhelmed, anxious and exhausted. This kind of future thinking often causes undue stress and 18 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

worry, but also takes us away from the current moment where we could be doing something within our current situation. It is important to plan for the future, but also being in the present through mindfulness is a skill to utilize when feelings of being overwhelmed happen more and more often.

How Can I be More Mindful?

There are many things that each of us can do to become more mindful when we are caring for others. The most important thing is stop and breathe! By stopping your mind and body and focusing on taking slow, deep, and refreshing breaths, you reset yourself and are better able to move forward in a more calm and positive way. Focus on the person who is in front of you today, not who the person used to be or may be in the future. Be present and active within their current strengths and abilities, and make your time together meaningful and enjoyable. Be patient with yourself as you walk through this journey, and refocus yourself often by taking each moment as it comes. Take time to feel the sunshine, enjoy a cool breeze, or laugh until your belly hurts. Enjoy the smell and taste of a favorite food, or enjoy the beauty of a sunset. These are the memories that will last, and you will be surprised at what you will learn about yourself in being mindful while caring for others. In your journey as a caregiver, be sure to take care of yourself so that you can better care for others. Practice mindfulness often and reach out for help and support whether it be from natural supports such as family and friends, or professional supports such as therapists, support groups, or care managers (caremanager. org). Also, there are numerous websites such as the family caregiver alliance (caregiver.org) as well as websites on mindfulness (for example mindfulnet.org) to provide support and education. If you would like to read more about mindfulness, the following authors present useful information: Jon KabatZinn, Sharon Salzberg, Thich Nhat Hanh and Eckhart Tolle. Mary Carroll, MSW, is a geriatric care manager at REAL Senior Solutions through REAL Services and the Area 2 Agency on Aging. She is a lifelong resident of the Michiana area and currently lives in South Bend with her husband and daughter. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

The

Osei Family By Chelle Costello

Our August cover family doesn’t just have beautiful smiles; they have a beautiful story. I spoke with Adwoa Osei, mom and board-certified pediatrician, along with her husband Kwabena – also a board-certified pediatrician – about their journey from Ghana to the U.S., the stark differences between preventative and tropical medicine and how their experiences in Africa gave them an edge in America

Climbing the Ladder

Adwoa and Kwabena were born and raised in Ghana and trained and worked there for a few years, until they moved to Baltimore in 2002 so Kwabena could earn his master’s in public health at John Hopkins University. Their 9-year-old son, Sean, was only 6 months old at the time. The couple studied for the medical licensing exam and two years later moved to Michigan to complete their residencies in pediatrics – while living two hours apart.

20 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

On the upside, during their residencies, since both of the Oseis were trained physicians in Ghana, they realized this had given them deeper experiences in medicine than some of their American counterparts. “In Ghana, we deal with a lot of infectious diseases – malaria, pneumonia, meningitis, anemia,” Adwoa ticks off the list. “But in the U.S., we practice medicine that is more preventative – ear infections, sore throats and the like. Tropical medicine is very different. In Ghana, we learned to pick up the variations of

diseases clinically with little or no support in terms of lab work and x-rays. But in America, you get the added advantage of technology/labs to assist you with making the right diagnosis.” So the Oseis were prepared to spot and quickly make diagnoses, setting them apart as having a strong foundation in clinical skills. And since the Oseis had practiced and been trained in Ghana, they were used to seeing the medical extremes of that country, which gave them nerves of steel. Instead of being shocked or overwhelmed by critical situations, they simply did what they needed to do with empathy and compassion for their patients – something that can’t necessarily be taught. When asked about the inevitable culture shock she and her husband must have experienced when coming to the U.S., Adwoa laughs and admits, “We experienced culture shock everywhere!” For Adwoa, life in the U.S. moved at a much faster pace than in Ghana, and her residency demanded long hours, but prepared her to practice medicine on her own. “We also had to learn to speak without an accent,” she adds in her perfect American diction, a testimony to her hard work and study. Her interactions with patients changed as well: “Back in Ghana, the patients don’t really question what the doctor does, either. In America, I would describe the relationship as more customerservice based. There are very well- informed (or sometimes misinformed, due to what’s on the internet) patients and parents who are asking intelligent questions.” But perhaps one of the biggest differences between practicing medicine here versus Ghana has to do with the long-term relationships she can now build with her patients. “In Ghana, there was instant gratification – you got to see the kids go from very ill to much better. But here you have a long-term relationship with the children and experience the pleasure of seeing them grow into healthy toddlers and adolescents, while in Ghana you would only see the children when they were very ill. There are also more resources available for doctors. When I came here, it felt like a luxury, getting whatever you wanted to help aid your patient. We feel blessed to have had the opportunity to see both ends of health care spectrum.”

The Balancing Act

Being far away from home, we don’t have the luxury of having grandparents or family members to watch our children when they fall sick. Some days, however, we don’t have much of a choice but to have the sick child hang out at the office with us.” Living in a household with two pediatricians makes for kids who are used to their parents being on call. “Every time I head towards the garage door, my son Sean asks, ‘Daddy, are you going to work again?’” Kwabena says. Their 5-year-old daughter, Rosie, loves mimicking her parents, often playing doctor with a pager and stethoscope. But these busy parents always carve out special time for family. “Our favorite time together is having dinner together, which we can do about three weeknights in the week, and we absolutely enjoy it. When we both have a weekend off, we have to be together as much as possible,” Adwoa says, describing to me their several road trips to Lake Michigan. The Oseis do plan to go back to Ghana at some point. “The children need to get a sense of the other part of the world,” Adwoa says. They visited last Christmas, where the children happily blended right in with their family. The Oseis attribute their success to their family, especially their parents who have made a point to cross continents and see the children at least once a year. Even with busy schedules, the kids keep up with extracurriculars and hobbies. Sean plays soccer, basketball, golf and loves to watch most sports – especially the LA Lakers. “He is our goto guy for sports statistics,” Kwabena says. Meanwhile, Rosie participates in ballet, soccer and loves to paint. As for mom and dad, in their spare time, Kwabena enjoys golf and soccer, while Adwoa blogs about her baking, crafting and party planning and is even learning to play the violin. She also volunteers to talk to expectant mothers at prenatal classes and teenage mothers at the Merit Learning Center. Like so many families in our area, the Oseis strive to fill their lives with service to others and time with family. And with as much care as they put into both, we feel truly fortunate to have them as part of our community.

For the last two years of the Oseis’ residencies, the couple lived two hours apart in Michigan and began looking for a place to work closer together. Luckily they found positions at Goshen Pediatrics, and life changed dramatically. “We see patients in the office and hospital during the day, and both of us work full time now, so we are always shuffling the kids between us,” Adwoa says. “Our life is a little different.

Chelle Costello lives in South Bend and teaches English at Indiana University.

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family features

Back to School!

No More School’s-Almost-Here

Zombie Eyes

Taming the Jitters Before They Start

By Michelle Wegner

Summer is over. My children slowly deflate with each pool toy that is put away until next year. They dread what’s coming – school. No more late summer nights playing in the yard until their tired little legs can’t run anymore. No more chasing the ice-cream truck down the block. No more sleepovers with friends, and saddest to our older two girls, no more sleeping in until lunchtime. Worst of all, I start to see the dreaded school’s-almosthere-zombie-eyes-from-not-sleeping-and-worrying-too-much look plastered all over my children’s faces. With all these adjustments to their cozy routine and schedule, predictably comes the “Before The School Year Jitters.” All three of our children experience these jitters at different levels. We get everything from simple nervousness about what teacher they will get all the way to tummy aches and serious insomnia starting about August 1st until around the second week of school, once they finally get settled in. It’s difficult to find ways to ease their little minds, especially when their anxiety is something I cannot talk them down from. To get some advice, I spoke with Dr. Ron Craker, parent coach to families with young children, about some ways to help ease this transition from summer bliss to school year chaos. Dr. Craker says the key to alleviating your child’s anxiety is to learn what makes your child feel comfortable once they have adjusted to the school routine. “The key to the solution is what makes your child relax come the second week of September,” Dr. Craker says. “Have a talk with your child, and instead of asking why she gets nervous or can’t sleep, ask her what’s different after the second week of school that helps her feel more relaxed. We know anxiety is a mind game we play with ourselves.”

T.I.F to F.I.T

Dr. Craker offers an easy acronym to help parents better understand what feeds into our child’s anxiety: “We fuel anxiety into a “T.I.F.” by having certain Thoughts, Images or Imaginings, and certain Feelings that turn fleeting “butterflies in the stomach” into more serious anxieties that stop us from doing things.” He goes on to explain that parents often help fuel their child’s anxiety by asking the wrong question. We’ve all been there; we want to know the cause of our child’s fears, so we prod and continually ask him or her what’s wrong in order to get to the root of the problem. Dr. Craker says that by taking this approach we actually keep the child fixated on those negative thoughts, images and feelings. “Instead of asking ourselves as parents, ‘How do I deal with the before-school-year jitters?’ a better question is, ‘How do I tap into the calm feelings kids have after the first couple of weeks of school.’ As Dr. Craker explains, the answer to this question can begin to change everything, flipping TIF into a FIT child who is ready for the transition to school. 22 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

“Helping your child tap into the Feeling, Images, and Thoughts they possess when they are feeling confident about school is the key,” he says. So, how do you go about getting your child from TIF to FIT? Dr. Craker suggests sitting down and saying the following to your child:

“Let’s pretend it’s early October. You have been in school for a few weeks; you feel confident, relaxed, prepared, and you’re enjoying school. What thingsaboutschoolorwhatwe’redoingathomehelpsyoufeelconfident and relaxed?” While you have this discussion with your anxious kid, Dr. Craker says to have the child focus on the feelings, images and thoughts that are positive and instill a confident, relaxed feeling. He notes, “You will probably find your child’s answers revolve around one of three issues: Being confident about the environment of the school, the social life of school, or the transition of going to school (the rhythm of getting ready, going to school, coming home and studying).

Putting Yourself in Their Shoes

Understanding where our kids are coming from isn’t difficult to do, even if it has been a while since we’ve done the whole back-to-school routine ourselves. Nevertheless, we’ve all been in similar situations, even as adults. “Think about yourself for a moment,” says Dr. Craker. “Have you ever had to go to a conference in a strange hotel or tried to meet friends at a very large, crowded event where you haven’t been before? I guarantee this is what you do: You prepare for the ‘transition’; you think a lot about it before you go. You spend extra time planning what to wear, getting a GPS map to the place, double checking the schedule, and so on. When you get there, you need to ‘own the environment.’ You stop just inside the entrance to the large hall and scan the whole place. You scope where the coffee table is, how big, hot, noisy, or cold the room is. You get your bearings. Only then can your brain shift focus to the social demands of the environment. Now you can find your friends, meet people you didn’t know before, or walk the long way around so you wouldn’t have to face the person you don’t really want to talk to. “Each year when your child starts school, it is the same for them. Usually there is one of these three issues (the transition, the environment or the social aspect) that is the most difficult for your child to manage, and the clue will be in the answers they give about what is now making them more confident about school.”

Practical Steps and Ideas

So, now that you know what anxieties are bothering your child, how do you begin to address them and help alleviate their worries?

Transitions

Dr. Craker says that if the issue is with transitions, then you can proactively start moving to your school-day schedule early: “Go through the getting-up

routine, and instead of getting on the bus, plan a trip to the library so you actually get up, eat, grab a backpack and leave the house.”

School Environment

If your child is worried about the school environment itself, Dr. Craker recommends going to any school open houses or walk-around days offered before class begins. “Even better, call the school and ask for permission to come in and walk around the school when it is quiet and mostly empty,” Dr. Craker suggests. “Meeting the child’s teacher ahead of time can be a great help, too. Even if your child has gone to the same school for five straight years, it doesn’t matter. If a child needs to ‘own the space’ before they feel comfortable, they need to do this.”

Here’s what makes Growing Kids special:

Educational Excellence: Our students enjoy educational activities designed to inspire growth. And they have fun along the way.

Extraordinary Care: Staff members are committed to providing individualized attention in a creative environment with an unmatched level of safety and security. Exceptional Value: Don’t take our word for it. Visit other child care facilities in the area. It’s the best way to see for yourself what makes Growing Kids such a great value. Five centers in South Bend, Elkhart, and Valparaiso. • Full or part-time care • Evening care as late as 11:30 pm • Infants (6 wks) through school age • Camps–winter, spring, summer • Monday-Friday; only 6 holidays • Before/after school care For more information, call 574-220-6400 or visit GrowingKids.com

Save $50

Social Life

There are ways to help your kids feel better about making friends and reconnecting with their classmates. Dr. Craker says, “You can start to make reconnections with favorite classmates by intentionally getting the kids together for play dates, meeting at the school playground, or taking a school walk-through together.”

Enroll NOW!

New emrollments only Cannot be combined with other offers. Expires 12/31/12 4 years in a row

Your Homework: Focus on Strengths

The key to a successful back-to-school transition with minimal anxiety is focusing on the positive. “Take your parental focus off the anxiety, and put it on the strengths your child feels when they are confident and relaxed about school,” recommends Dr. Craker. “This change of focus will also help you keep your own anxiety at bay. You can even share an example with your child of a time when you had “butterflies” about something you had to do, but did it anyway, with confidence, and how proud you felt about it.” Just like you, around the beginning of August, when I start to see the dreaded school’s-almosthere-zombie-eyes-from-not-sleeping-andworrying-too-much, I’m going to pull out some of Dr. Craker’s ideas and approach the topic with a less worried stance on my part. I’m going to remain positive and calm like he suggests and try to pull out of my girls what brings them comfort, not what or why they are afraid. We may have butterflies this fall when school starts again, but hopefully – no zombie eyes.

Michelle Wegner is mom to three spirited little girls, Maddie-12, Whitney-10 and Isabelle-6. Her husband is a pastor at Granger Community Church, and they have been married for 17 years. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family features

Back to School!

Skipping the Dorm.

Opting for Home. Insights to Help You and Your At-Home College Freshman Make the Transition By Stephanie J. Salisbury

t happens overnight. One day, you have a 17-year-old child in your house with a curfew, chores, allowance and a firm desire to follow your every rule. Then they have their eighteenth birthday and suddenly, magically, they are fully adept at making financial decisions, moral judgments, and have perfectly mature reactions because, of course, your teen is now an adult. (If you are an 18-year-old, you are nodding vigorously. If you are a parent, you’re laughing your head off with me, right?) Often these days, more parents and teens are coming to the conclusion that their student should live at home while attending a local college. It makes fiscal sense, of course, but it also helps both the parent and the child (excuse me, “young adult”) with the transition out of the nest.

Setting the Ground Rules

If you and your teen have come to the conclusion that he or she should live at home during part of their college experience, it is 24 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

important that you sit and talk about the expectations on both sides of the table. Parents, you will not have as tight of a rein on your teens as you did before they graduated high school and turned eighteen. Students, you will have to maintain a balance between your independence and your responsibilities to the household and your parents. It all boils down to mutual respect. If you can lay a firm foundation there, the transition can be very simple. Carlie Barr, who attended IUSB and lived with her father, says, “A 17-year-old should have many of the same rules and expectations an 18-year-old. Some rules should become more lenient while others become more firm.” For instance, in regard to a curfew, Barr says, “Even a dorm has a curfew. At home, a curfew may be set,” she suggests, “but it ought to be flexible. The balance of allowing freedom and imposing rules is delicate and tough to manage, but the parent should try to maintain it.” Julie Musser, a parent with both a son and a daughter at IUSB, agrees. “They are expected to stay in touch, and just let us know when they will be home,” she says. “They are becoming adults

and want their own lives, but they are still under our roof.” This thought pattern is a common one amongst parents or guardians of live-at-home college students. When it comes to rules and expectations, Meredith B., whose teen attended Oakland Community College, says, “The rules didn’t change because they weren’t suddenly less important to us once she turned 18. Also, it is very little to ask of anyone, especially a capable young adult, to keep their room clean and contribute to other household chores. We all make the mess; we can all work together to clean up.”

Measuring the Pros and Cons

Besides living at home rent-free, which most students do, there are other benefits to remaining under a parent’s care. “Often times I would have food at home that I didn’t have to pay for, or have dinners and other meals made for me,” says Amy Hershberger, who attended Goshen College while living at home. “If my car broke down, I could call my dad and he could come fix it while I was in class. Also, it was a special treat when he would call me and we could meet for lunch somewhere.” There are drawbacks as well, of course. “I wasn’t as involved with school activities as I could have been,” says Hershberger. “I didn’t attend a lot of games, or go to the social events that they had – but then, I didn’t really have time with working so much.”

Since a lot of students attend classes and work, they are able to save up quite a bit of money while living at home and can graduate college debt-free. It’s a tradeoff, in most students’ eyes. Amanda Van Ness attended John Wood Community College in Quincy, IL, where her family resides, and says, “I felt like I couldn’t really experience the full college scene, but home-cooked meals? That was a double bonus of living at home!” Whether you maintain strict rules or are more lenient with your young adult as they begin to taste their freedom, communication and respect will, again, be the key. They need to remember it is your home, your rules, and your pocketbook that foots the bill for most things. You, on the other hand, need to remember that your teen will never grow into a full-fledged adult without you allowing them some independence and freedom. Ultimately, they will succeed in flying the nest and you will secretly have had a few extra nights where you peeked at them while they slept, smiled, and thought, “That’s my baby.”

Stephanie J. Salisbury, University of Michigan graduate, has published two books and maintains a well-followed inspirational blog. She and her husband sing, act, direct and work together.

Fashion has evolved.. so has your bleach!.

NO spills, NO splash, NO mess.TM Never need to use liquid bleach again!TM Find it at your local Big Box SupercenterSupermarket Retailer near you

Evolving new concepts for cleaningTM

www.novabella.com THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family features

Back to School!

Back-to-School:

De-Cluttering with a Purpose s e v o Thanks to Goodwill, there are new benefits to L getting organized this school year. will

Good

Soon enough a flood of school papers, backpacks and more will descend upon your home in the whirlwind of back-to-school craziness. But instead of getting overwhelmed, get organized. Thanks to Goodwill and its collaboration with certified professional organizer Lorie Marrero, moms have even more reasons to get organized and stay that way. And there’s no better time to get organized than as the kids head back to school. Goodwill has partnered with The FAMILY Magazines to kick off a new donation program called Goodwill Loves Moms during luncheons September 13 at Windsor Park Conference Center in Mishawaka and September 14 at the Strongbow Inn in Valparaiso. This new offering is a rewards program designed especially for moms. “We have a constant need for donations, and we also know that moms are our primary donors,” said Debie Coble, vice president of Workforce Development Services for Goodwill Industries of Michiana. At the luncheons, guests will receive a re-usable donation bag, a program enrollment form and a rewards card, as well as Lorie’s book “The Clutter Diet.” Each time a mom brings her bag to one of Goodwill’s 22 drive-thru stores, she will get her card validated. After 10 validations, she will be given a pre-postage paid envelope to send in her card to receive a reward valued at no less than $25. The program is a win-win for moms and the community as a whole. According to Debie, “Donations are our lifeline. If we don’t have donations, we don’t have sales. It is the revenue from the stores that funds many of our programs that assist people with barriers to employment to prepare to go to work, find jobs and retain them. By individuals donating, they are helping us fulfill the mission of making a stronger community by having more people employed. Last year, we assisted 844 in going to work. Donors are also helping themselves by getting rid of the items in their homes that are simply taking up space and are no longer needed. We are often able to relax better when our homes are not cluttered with all the ‘stuff ’ we don’t need or use.” 26 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

By Meagan Church

To Purchase Tic

kets

Lunchetoonthe Visit s, tick ets.goodw -ni.org ill

Lorie couldn’t agree more, as she said, “I am passionate about de-cluttering because I hate how it gets in the way of peoples lives. I don’t organize because things need to be perfect and lined up on a shelf. I do it for efficiency sake. It’s a means to an end. It’s not just something you do because it is fun. All of this extra stuff in our lives and heads and closets holds us back from things that are more important to us, such as the people we love and the things we want to create.” So what do we do with all that extra stuff? There’s a simple enough solution; before school begins, go through your home and bag up any unnecessary, unneeded or no longer used items. Then drop them at your closest Goodwill. With the Goodwill Loves Moms punch card, you’ll be rewarded each time you drop off a bag full.

Get Organized!

But, how do we prepare for the extras that will be coming once school starts? Lorie has a game plan to help create a smoother, more organized transition to the year: 3 Weeks Before Make a family calendar. Start a family binder that can hold important information and phone numbers. Find out orientation times and meetings. Go through clothing. Check back-to-school sales. Get the school supplies list. Plan for the papers that will come home from school, but limit the amount of containers. 2 Weeks Before Shop for supplies and clothes. Consider bed and wake-up times. Confirm childcare arrangements.

Write down morning, afterschool and evening routines. Create a place for kids to do homework.

NOW ENROLLING!

1 Week Before Talk to the kids about school to allay any fears and concerns. Make a menu plan for the first two weeks. Create a rotation menu for breakfasts. Buy groceries. Practice routines. Set rules for homework and screen time after school. Adjust bed and wake-up times. Practice the drive to school, walk to the bus stop, etc. Wash clothes. Day Before Establish the new evening routine. First Day Get up and work the plan. First Week Review the teacher’s instructions and discuss with your child. Buy any additional supplies needed. Put information on the calendar and the family binder. Fill out forms, buy lunch tickets, etc. Make adjustments as necessary. With some forethought and planning, back-to-school time can start smoothly, but the work doesn’t end once the school bell rings. “We can’t forget that all of this back-to-school prep doesn’t stop the first day of school. The real work begins that first day,” Lorie warned. But, as she continued to say, “It’s a lot of work to be organized. I’m not going to lie to anyone and say it’s easy. It takes work, but we need to remember why we are doing it and the benefits it can have.” Getting organized does take work, but the benefits of saving time, money and stress make the payoff even better. Plus, thanks to the Goodwill Loves Moms program, the benefits are extended to the community by helping more people find employment and purpose. So, let the de-cluttering begin! Meagan Church is a writer and mother of 3 kids. Her current projects include DefiningMotherhood, and Unexpectant where she explores the realities of modern motherhood for her book project.

♦ ONLY Accredited Montessori school in Michiana ♦ Nationally recognized for high performance ♦ Comprehensive curriculum for all ages www.aneducationforlife.org 574-256-5313 530 East Day Road, Mishawaka, IN (East of Grape Rd. and Main St.)

A Healthy Start for a

Brighter Future $ 100 OFF ANY SERVICE

New patients only. Patients with insurance DO quality. Must have a signed treatment plan and work must be completed. Cannot be combined with any other offer or discount. Must present coupon. No refunds. No cash value. Expires 11/30/12. PROMO CODE: FM10008

GAS CARD

All qualifying patients must be new patients who obtain an Exam, any required X-Rays and Cleaning. Oral health must qualify. Patients with insurance DO qualify. Must present coupon. Must be 18 years of age or older to qualify. Cannot be combined with any other offer or discount. No cash value. Expires 11/30/12. PROMO CODE: FM2512

We accept most insurance, including Medicaid, Cigna, Delta Dental and many more.

574-968-3719

6502 Grape Road, Suite 882 Monday - Thursday 8-5 Mishawaka Friday 8-1 www.universitymeadowsfamilydental.com THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family features

Back to School! By Sarah Martin

ART SMART Making Art a Part of Your Family’s Life

At the end of each week during the school year, your budding artist brings home an armful of newly minted masterpieces. While

you love seeing these amazing works of art and want nothing more than to share them with everyone who comes into your home, you’re running out of room! Your fridge is wallpapered with prints and drawings; your hallway is lined floor to ceiling with paintings; and every horizontal surface in your living room is covered with sculptures of varying size. Short of starting your own museum, what’s a parent to do?

Show It Off

You don’t have to sacrifice your home’s style (or your sanity) to display your child’s artwork. Here are some display options starting with the easiest to implement and ending with a few more elaborate ideas.

Art Line

Laundry shouldn’t have all the fun hangin’ out on a line! Artworks look amazing clothes-pinned to a line of twine, ribbon or cord. Simply pin each end of your line to the wall and start hanging artwork. You and your child can swap artworks of varying size in and out with just the squeeze of a clothespin.

breeze. With a hammer, some small nails, and a handful of binder clips (or a few clipboards), you can create a wall display that’s both attractive and easy to use. Binder clips now also come in fun colors that can complement any décor. Clip away! Another helpful office supply is the good ol’ 3-ring binder. Filled with clear sheet protectors stuffed full of your child’s artwork and topped off with a fun, decorated cover, 3-ring binders hold and protect artwork neatly with style (they also store very nicely).

Curtain Call

A basic curtain rod strung with curtain rings with clips makes an attractive hanging rail for art and can easily be tied into your décor. Whether hung at child height or in multiple rows covering a wall, curtain rods can create a unique gallery for your child’s artwork (or any artwork for that matter).

Magnetic Personality

Magnets have made the move from the fridge to pretty much any surface in your home thanks to magnetic paint. Walls, dressers, cabinets – you name it – can now be magnetized! This opens up a world of possibilities for displaying your child’s artwork. With a couple of coats of magnetic paint, followed by a few coats of latex paint in the color of your choice, you can turn any wall in your home into a magnetic gallery.

Pop the Cork!

Put it Away (or Purge, Store, Repeat)

News flash: corkboards can be sophisticated. Cork has come a long way, baby! Cork tiles can be found at craft and home improvement stores and are easily attached to walls with double stick tape. Works of art can be pinned up in a flash and changed out just as easily.

More artwork comes home with your child than you can possibly display or keep. It can be overwhelming to look at it all and feel that you not only need to display everything, but that you must preserve each and every piece for posterity. The solution? Purge, store, repeat.

For an even more sophisticated cork installation, cut cork tiles fit into frames of different sizes and styles (keep costs low by collecting frames from garage sales, thrift stores and the dollar store) and then arrange the frames on a wall.

Every month or so, take the stack of artwork your child brought home that month, sit down together and talk about each piece. Start by asking them which ones are their favorites (limit it to a first, second and third choice), and then tell them which ones are your favorites. From the selected favorites, choose several for display. Next, go through the remaining artworks and decide which ones can be given as gifts. Grandparents and other relatives are obvious potential recipients, but don’t forget neighbors, babysitters, pediatricians and dentists. Anyone who interacts with your child on a regular basis is fair game. Your child will enjoy sharing their work with others, especially the response they get from the recipients.

Tip: Paint the frames to match your décor and to unify frames of different styles.

From Office to Art Gallery

Give your office supplies a second look. Sure, binder clips and clipboards come in handy at the office, but they also make displaying artwork a 28 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

Once you’ve selected the works to display and the works to give away, you’re left with a pile of works destined for a storage container or a more serious fate we’ll get to in a minute. To determine which works head to storage, ask your child which of the remaining pieces they would like to keep as a memory of their current school year (again limit it to a first, second and third choice). Those pieces then go directly into a plastic bin or tote designated for this purpose. Now you need to address the remaining artworks, the ones destined for a more serious fate – that of the recycling bin or garbage can. At first it may be hard for your child (and you) to put a work of art in the trash, but talking about it together and allowing your child to make the call as to which works stay and which ones go is far less traumatic than having them finding a prized artwork “stored” in the garbage the morning after they brought it home. At the end of each school year, you can repeat the storage/ purge process so that you don’t end up with a basement packed to the rafters with storage containers filled with artwork.

Be sure to put your child’s name and their age on the back of each work before you display it, give it away or store it. When they’re adults, it will be fun for both of you to go through their stored artworks and take a trip back to their childhood. If you and your child absolutely, positively cannot bear to be separated from a single work of art, you can always scan or digitally photograph an artwork. These digital files will take up much less space in your home (though maybe not on your hard drive) and can easily be looked through and shared at any time. These digital versions of your child’s artwork can also be printed onto mugs, puzzles, calendars, t-shirts or anything else you can dream up. Whatever display and storage method you choose, choose one that works for your lifestyle, and art will become an integral part of your family’s life.

Sarah Martin is the Curator of Education, Public Programs at the Snite Museum of Art at the University of Notre Dame. She is most likely responsible for at least a few of those artworks that come into your home with your child. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

30 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

The FAMILY Magazines 1233 E. University Drive Granger, IN 46530 574.387.5420 michianafamilymagazine.com

Hey Kids!

Color this page and 3 coloring winners will each receive a family four pack of tickets to LegoLand provided by The FAMILY Magazines! One winner will be selected from each of the three following age categories: 3-5, 6-9 and 10-12 years of age.

NAME: _________________________________________ AGE: ______ ADDRESS: __________________________________________________ CITY: ___________________________ STATE: ______ ZIP: _________ DAY TIME PHONE: __________________________________________ PARENT’S NAME: ___________________________________________ E-MAIL: ____________________________________________________

For your chance to WIN, color your best picture and mail or drop entries to: FAMILY Magazines • 1233 E. University Drive • Granger, IN 46530. – Coloring contest is open to children 12 years and under, and entries must be mailed or dropped by September 2nd. Winners will be notified via phone or email service by The FAMILY Magazines by September 12th, and their artwork will be featured in an upcoming issue along with their first name, age and city. For additional coloring contest entries, this coloring page may be photocopied and printed off. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

FAMILY Magazines 1233 E. University Drive Granger, IN 46530 574.387.5420 michianafamilymagazine.com

V X O P S R D W E N B J N T T N S I B T

K Z N A L W C Y L O S I V G W D H B L E

X G E W I X P S E I I E Y T N N A Y R X

L H S N C E L A M T B C L E U C N E R T

O O U Y N O S H E A L F I U K C B V H B

Have Fun! Backpack Firstweek Highschool Notebooks Paper Registration September 32 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

E G O S E E M F N R N R I P D M R I U O

Z Z H H P T H P T T F E A R E E G I L O

I E N W C H N W A S X C W T S H H B A K

Y B E Y I S A U R I K U P S S T Y C B H

R E P A P R E Y Y G M E W C H X W E S O

H V O V U K H L H E S Z H Q W O C E D K

C L A S S E S D D R X O C W P P E G E G

B D P U T V W E F D O B L P G L G S A K

N O T E B O O K S L I S U B L O O H C S

Find the words below in the Premier Arts Crossword puzzle. Words can be forwards, backwards, diagonal, vertical or horizontal.

Classes Friends Middleschool Openhouse Pencils Schedules Textbook

Elementary Haircut Newshoes Orientation Pens Schoolbus

N O I T A T N E I R O M G A X T B P F O

We have it all more at &

St. Thomas the Apostle Catholic School!

Now Registering for NEW Students! • Outstanding Academics • Safe Environment • Excellent ISTEP Scores • SMART Board Technology • Before and After School Care • Christian Family Atmosphere • Community Service Activities and Involvement • Specialty Classes: Art, Music, Computer, Physical Education • Extracurricular Activities ranging from Sports, Band, Scouting, Drama & More! • 21st Century Learning Facility Recently Renovated and Expanded St. Thomas the Apostle School is Catholic in character, but open to all faith traditions. Approximately 12% of our current enrollment is non-Catholic. Please call our school office at 574.264.4855 for more information or to schedule a tour. Visit us at www.stselkhart.com or www.stthomaselkhart.com! St. Thomas the Apostle Catholic School 1331 North Main Street • Elkhart, IN 46514

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family features

Back to School!

Back-To-School Trends

By Kathy Friend

The old saying “what goes around comes around” is more than a saying in the world of fashion. The truth about trends is that most are reincarnations of things we’ve seen somewhere in the past. Some bring back memories we wish would have stayed in the past. For some of us, the 80s were a great time of hair bands, college friends and living life to its fullest. For others, the 80s were a tragic exercise in bad music, crazy clothes and an over-obsessed generation of head bangers. Whatever your feelings on the subject, the bottom line is that the 80s are back in the world of fashion – especially in the world of back-to-school 2012! Here are some trends to be on the lookout for if you have a fashion maven in the making in your household:

Stacks of Bangle Bracelets

Neon

Love It! Mixing textures and colors will be a key way to be on trend with this look.

Remember the neon of the 80s? It came back this summer and is following us into fall. Love It! Neon denim, shoes and sweaters. Not So Sure? Try neon in small doses – maybe in a Chuck Taylor type tennis shoe or a handbag.

Bleached

We all did this in the 80s. We got a pair of jeans and bleached them. Problem with our “home method” was that we then smelled like bleach for weeks. Love It! Over distressed and bleached denim will be all the rage this fall. Not So Sure? Skip the jeans and opt for a bleached jean jacket.

Ah, the memories of Madonna during her material-girl days.

Not So Sure? Try a simple stack of maybe three at first. Trust me, this trend will grow on you, and you’ll soon be stacking on the bracelets up to your elbows!

Granny Boots

Confession – I loved my 80s granny boots and wore them with everything, and I do mean everything! I am very happy they are back! Love It! Get a few pair with varying hardware – maybe a black pair with strong military details and a chunky heel and then add a brown pair with a slim heel for something more feminine. Not So Sure? All of the discount shoe stores will have a variety of this style in the fall, so you can try out this look without spending much.

Boat Shoes

Big Shoulders

When I say Sperry Topsider, what do you think? I remember a time in the 80s I fondly remember as the “gator bowl.” No, it wasn’t a football event, but rather a “preppy” contest between me and a few girlfriends. Boat shoes were key to this middle-school event – boat shoes of all colors!

Love It! Layer up your shoulder pads! Be sure to get some that you can add into every shirt and jacket.

Love It! Some of the cutest boat shoes I’ve ever seen are in stores this season, everything from a dressy metallic to a sporty tartan. Be sure to pick up a pair in your team’s colors!

Big shoulders always make me think of the days of “Dynasty” and “Dallas,” and if you have no idea what I’m talking about, then you are probably under 35!

Not So Sure? The good news is that shoulder pads have been making a comeback for several seasons, and you probably didn’t even notice! 34 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

Not So Sure? This trend is one that you can be safe in trying. I

promise; it’ll work well for you, especially in those times when a tennis shoe is appropriate, but you just aren’t in the mood for an athletic shoe.

Boyfriend Jackets

A boyfriend jacket is simply an oversize unstructured blazer. I have many photos (that should be burned) of me and my girlfriends proudly wearing the boyfriend jackets with our granny boots and miniskirts. Yes, we thought we were amazing, big hair and all! Love It! Bring on the pins! The best way to don your boyfriend jacket this season will be to accessorize it with a plethora of pins and brooches, a la 80s style. Not So Sure? Go basic with black or grey. There are some styles that have a bit more structure.

Super Skinnies

The super skinny jean is here to stay. This season, if you want to embrace all that is 80s, then do this look with a granny boot and a boyfriend jacket. Love It! Bring on the skinnies in hot neon colors! Not So Sure? If you aren’t sure the skinnyjean trend is for you, then skip it! This trend brings a lot of attention to your bottom half of your silhouette.

Kathy Friend is a fashion expert, image Evelyn Kirkwood is Director of St. consultant, speaker and writer. She is Joseph County Parks in Indiana and a regular on the WFRN Morning Show host of Outdoor Elements which is and on WSBT-TV. She is also the broadcast Sundays at 9:00 a.m. on fashion expert for Goodwill stores. She WNIT Public Television. is joyfully married to Marty, and a mom to one little fashionista in training. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

family features

Back to School!

After-School

Activities

The Good, the Bad and the Insanely Busy By Stephanie Graham

Sports, clubs, art, music, volunteering – all of these activities can be fantastic opportunities for your children to grow and excel during their after-school hours this year. For some kids, it’s a chance to do something they love instead of spending the afternoon in an empty house while their parents are still at work. For others, it will look great on scholarship and college applications. And for some, it’s simply a chance to practice something they enjoy. There are plenty of benefits to extra-curricular activities. When it has a good, positive team atmosphere, it offers great social interaction, according to Kim Dodd, MA, licensed therapist of Center for Marriage and Family Therapy in Granger. “That is going to help kids socially engage with each other and know how to work together as a team.” Local father Sean Burns has a high schooler who plays soccer each fall. For them, the health benefits are a huge bonus. “The kid’s in good shape,” he says. It also gives children a chance to work at something they are specifically interested in. Kids spend most of the school day exercising their brains on subjects that are required, so this can be a fantastic outlet for them. For Niles mom Gail Bliss, it was a great opportunity for her kids to foster their particular interest, be it art, music or sports. “It also gave them some good exposure to people who were professionals in their fields,” she says. This was a great chance to see that their interests could some day be pursued successfully as careers.

bit overwhelming,” she says. With so many options, your kids can feel pressure to be everywhere at once, taking advantage of every opportunity that comes along. The demands on the children’s time can affect the entire family as well. With sometimes two hours of practice and about two hours of homework each school night, it can take a toll on other important aspects of life, like relaxing with family or going on vacation. Dodd says that sometimes it’s not the actual sport or club that’s the problem. Many times, it can be the people there. “If they’re on a negative team that is not a good role model for them, then they’re going to develop those negative traits.” This can manifest itself in your children adopting whatever negativity they are hearing and seeing on a regular basis, or they can feel that pessimism or resentment toward the teammates, coach or teacher.

How Can You Tell?

Remember when your children were first born and you learned to understand which cry meant they were hungry, wet or tired? How about when they were small children and from another room you could tell if their cry meant they were hurt or simply angry with their siblings? Though it gets more complex as children grow, parents need to pay similar attention to their teenagers’ nonverbal communication.

How Much is Too Much?

Some would argue, however, that kids are pushed too far to perform, filling every spare minute with something for school or other events. This is often the case, but it depends on the family, Dodd says. “I think every family is different, and some families are more high functioning. They have a lot of energy and need to get it out. Others aren’t.”

Signs can show up in various forms if your children have had a little too much of a good thing. Always pay close attention to their reactions before, during and after their activity. Do they complain about going? Do they get quiet and reserved? Sulky? These are not always signs that they should quit, but they are clues that you may need to investigate further.

For Bliss, the pressure lies mostly in the massive scope of choices. “There are so many possibilities out there today that it can get a

Often, the physical signs will come first, as sometimes people don’t realize they are stressed until their bodies start to tell them. “When

36 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

you’re going, going, going, your body is going to get sick more often,” Dodd says. Most of the teens she counsels for stress don’t come directly to her, but are referred by their family doctor.

do that. I’d pull my hair out,” he says. However, the three-month commitment to a more hectic schedule is doable, since there is an end in sight.

Friendships and family relationships can suffer as well. Generally, teenagers’ lives naturally revolve around their friendships, so avoiding their friends can be a good clue. As for the family, as Dodd puts it, “The more stress that is in my life, the less room there is for me to be able to deal with other people and their issues.” Home is where you will probably catch the first glimpses of more subtle lifestyle changes: eating poorly, sleeping less, and seeming edgy or depressed.

It is always important to look at the big picture with your kids. Talk to them and decide what your short- and long-term goals are. What do you want the end result to look like when they graduate from high school, then move on to college and beyond? Are all these activities helping or hindering? Can you stagger them so you have a break and are not involved in something continuously?

How to Strike a Balance

So is there a way to balance extra-curricular activities with school and life? Bliss took a strategic approach early on with her children. When they were little, she put them in a wider variety of sports and activities, then, “I watched them to see what they had a natural affinity for.” They played baseball, basketball and soccer, but once Bliss and her husband realized they did well in soccer, they stopped focusing on the other sports. As with many parents, for Burns it’s a little less strategic: “A lot of times we’re shooting that from the hip,” he says. What helps their situation is that they are a one-sport, one musical-instrument family. “Some kids go from soccer to basketball right into baseball. I couldn’t

It truly is a matter of balance in multiple ways: balancing parents’ desires with their children’s, and then balancing busy time with relaxation. Dodd refers to her earlier comment about how families function: “If I’m high functioning and my children are low functioning, I need to be aware and not push them to be like me. Some kids are pushed way too far and way too hard. Other kids are exactly where they need to be.”

Stephanie Graham and her husband have been married six years and have a hilarious 16-month-old son. She has been freelancing for eight years and loves to write about the most important privileges in life – parenting and family. Stephanie also blogs about how to get a loan-free degree.

When is the best time to clean your closets & save on a new wardrobe? Donate & Shop NOW!

Recycle Your Old Computers FREE at Goodwill.

$5.00 Off

Purchase of $10.00 or More With This Ad

Items sold in Goodwill Stores fund Goodwill’s mission to provide jobs, training and placement services for people with barriers to employment. Like Us Goodwill Family & MiChild 2012.i1 1

A Great Place To Shop! Valid at Goodwill of Michiana Retail Stores. No duplication of coupon. No other discounts apply. One coupon per customer. Excludes New Goods. Expires 12/31/12 Fam&MiCh 2012

www.goodwill-ni.org 37

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012 5:02:16 2/17/12

August 2012

Calendar of Events

Sunday

songs, finger plays and fun for children up to two years. Call 574.282.4641 for more info.

Imagine That! Toy Store, Mishawaka

Toddlertime

Drop-in Craft Day Every Sunday enjoy “Drop-in” Craft Day from 1 to 5 PM. All ages are welcome and an adult must accompany children. Pay $5 for the craft of the day to create and then take home with you! Call 574.254.1600 for more information and for a schedule of upcoming classes also available at the store.

Monday

Storytime Sampler Bittersweet Branch Library, Mishawaka

Storytime Sampler is held every second and fourth Monday of the month from 10:30 AM to 11 AM. This fun library time provides a sampling of the materials used in the preschool and toddler programs. Registration is not required. Call 574.259.0392 for more information.

Tuesday

Storytime at Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore

Every Tuesday near the fireplace in the bookstore, join story time with books, interactive songs and an art project or other activity for young children. Story time is at 11 AM and 1 PM and lasts 45-60 minutes. Check out the Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore Facebook page for an upcoming list of readings (click on the ‘Storytime’ tab).

Storytimes Francis Branch Library, South Bend

Every Wednesday at 10:10 AM and 11 AM, enjoy early literacy activities for children ages 2 to 3 ½, including stories, songs and games. Pre-register at www.libraryforlife. org or at 574.282.4607.

Storytime at the Library

Friday

St. Joseph County Public Library, Storytime Room

10:15 AM– Centre Township Branch, South Bend; Lakeville Branch, Lakeville 10:30 AM – South Bend Branches: River Park, Tutt, LaSalle, German Township

Every Wednesday enjoy stories, music, and movement that build early literacy skills and help your young child prepare for future learning success while developing a love of books. Open to children ages 5 and younger; families welcome. Visit www. libraryforlife.org for more info.

Drop-in Craft Day Imagine That! Toy Store, Mishawaka

Every Wednesday enjoy “Drop-in” Craft Day from 3:30 PM – 5:30 PM. All ages are welcome and an adult must accompany children. Pay $5 for the craft of the day to create and then take home with you! Call 574.254.1600 for more information and for a schedule of upcoming classes also available at the store.

Mom and Baby Exercise Class Thomson’s Physical Therapy, Niles, Michigan

Come get that pre-pregnancy body back while you stimulate your child’s development and learning. Classes are offered every Wednesday morning at 9:30 AM, and free childcare is provided for toddlers during the class (for mothers with more than one). Call for pricing info. For more info call 269.687.9110.

Lapsit for Prewalkers

Thursday

Every Tuesday at 10:10 AM, enjoy books, songs, finger plays and fun for children up to two years who haven’t yet mastered walking on their own. Pre-register online at www.libraryforlife.org or at 574.282.4607.

Wednesday Lapsit

Francis Branch Library, South Bend

Every Wednesday at 10 AM enjoy books, 38 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

Imagine That! Toy Store, Mishawaka

Every Thursday enjoy “Drop-in” Craft Day from 3:30 PM – 5:30 PM. All ages are welcome and an adult must accompany children. Pay $5 for the craft of the day to create and then take home with you! Call 574.254.1600 for more information and for a schedule of upcoming classes also available at the store.

Every Tuesday at 10 AM, enjoy stories, music and movement that build early literacy skills and help your young child prepare for future learning success while developing a love of books. Open to children ages 5 and younger; families welcome. Call 574.282.4641 for more info.

St. Joseph County Public Library, Storytime Room

Drop-in Craft Day

Storytime at Hammes Bookstore & Café on Eddy Street

Every Thursday at 11:30 AM, join story time with books, interactive songs and an art project or other activity for young children. Story time is at 11 AM and 1 PM and lasts 45-60 minutes. Check out the Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore Facebook page for an upcoming list of readings (click on the ‘Storytime’ tab).

Downtown South Bend’s First Fridays

The first Friday of each month explore downtown South Bend from 5 PM-9 PM. Visit www.dtsbfirstfridays.com for a listing of events taking place, including activities and experiences for kids, adults and families.

Saturday

Family Programs at Curious Kids’ Museum Curious Kids’ Museum and Discovery Zone, St. Joseph, MI

Every Saturday from 12 PM – 4 PM, the museum hosts family-friendly programs that are fun for all ages. Check out the new Discover Zone (for children ages 3 and up); also hosting Saturday family programming at the same time. Call 269.983.2543 for more information. Admission fee or membership to museum is required.

August Events Thursday, August 2

Diary of a Wimpy Kid Celebration Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown Branch

At 2:30 PM, children entering grades 3-6 are invited to enjoy an afternoon of fun and discussion to celebrate the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books by Jeff Kinney. Participate in the “know-it-all” trivia contest and play the Cheese Touch tug-o-war! Registration is required. For more information, call 574.259.5277, ext. 242.

Friday, August 3 On the River

Colfax Ave on the St. Joe River, South Bend

Each summer a group of young professionals take a vacant downtown lot and transform it into a full-fledged beach-themed venue, complete with 2,000 tons of sand, tiki huts, real palm trees and more. The event boasts three distinct parts: Teen Night, Family Day and the ever-popular 21+ Beach Bash. Live entertainment, food, fireworks, volleyball,

*Please be sure to call ahead to confirm times and information. Have an event you’d like to submit? Visit www.michianafamilymagazine.com! and excitement are just a few of the things you’ll find on the beach in downtown South Bend. August 3 and 4. Cost is $5-15. Visit ontheriverfest.com for advance discount tickets and more information.

Saturday, August 4

2nd Annual Toscana Park Summer Wine & Art Festival Toscana Park, Granger

Guests will receive a souvenir wine glass to sample over 100 quality wines from around the world. Enjoy live entertainment, and a runway fashion show presented by Flourish Boutique. There will also be unique paintings, ceramics, wine bottle chimes, sculptures and quality jewelry displayed by artisans. From 3 to 6 PM. Tickets can be purchased ahead of time at Villa Macri Ristorante/The Wine Gallery for $20 until August 3rd. $30 day of the event. Tickets are limited. All must be 21 years old to attend. Visit villamacri.com for more info.

Paws to Read Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Bittersweet Branch

Children entering grades 1-6 will have fun reading aloud to a canine companion from 2 to 3 PM. Children will be paired with Lady, a Great Pyrenees and her handler for one 15-minute session. Registration is not required. Just check in at the Children’s Services desk. For more information, call 574.259.0392.

Monday, August 6 Let’s Have a Picnic!

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown Branch

Children aged 2-7 are invited to celebrate National Picnic Month at 10:30 AM. Cozy up on a blanket, enjoy the story The Bunnies’ Picnic by Lezlie Evans, and make a craft. Just watch out for ants! Registration is not required, but children must be accompanied by an adult caregiver. For more information, call 574.259.5277, ext. 242.

Schedule in Style Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown Branch

Keep track of your schedule in your own style! Teens in grades 6-12 are invited to decorate their own calendar book to keep track of their schedule from 1 to 4 PM, or while supplies last. For more information, call 574.259.5277, ext. 218.

Tuesday, August 7

St. Joseph County Night Out Against Crime Ferrettie/Baugo Creek County Park, Osceola

This is a free event open to the public. See demonstrations by the St. Joseph County Police Department divisions, including K-9 and SWAT. Visit booths of local organizations and businesses to learn about the resources in the community. Free food and beverages, children’s carnival rides, fingerprint kits, and safety information. Many giveaways and drawings for prizes! Organized and sponsored by St. Joseph County Police Department. From 5:30 to 8:30 PM. For more info, visit sjcparks.org.

Friday, August 10 Ship N Shore

Whittaker Street, New Buffalo, MI

New Buffalo is home to the largest street fest in Southwest Michigan. Enjoy three days packed with great live music, food, kids’ activities and more! The highlight of the event is watching the floating parade through the harbor when yachts, sailboats and more are transformed into floating pieces of art. All decorated with lights, dancing on the water through the harbor followed by a huge fireworks display over Lake Michigan! From August 10-12. $5 suggested donation. Please visit newbuffalo. org for all event details.

The Hunger Games Discussion Group

will cover: The benefits of breastfeeding, how to know when your baby is hungry, proper latch-on methods, checking your baby’s input (feeding) and output (dirty or wet diapers), how to prepare to return to work and weaning. From 6 to 8:30 PM. $30 due at registration. For more info, visit lakelandhealth.org/breastfeeding.

Bug Lovers Camp Woodlawn Nature Center, Elkhart

Woodlawn Nature Center has a wonderful large bug collection. Kids will learn all about bugs, do fun activities and much more. They will spend part of their time in the woods and museum. From August 13-17. Cost $60. Starts at 8 AM. For more info, email cathy_deitch@yahoo.com.

Tuesday, August 14 Morning Book Discussion

Lincoln Township Public Library, Stevensville, MI

Come and discuss “What Alice Forgot” by Liane Moriarity. Copies will be available at the library. Free event. From 10:30 to 11:30 AM. For more info, visit lincolntownshiplibrary.org.

Diggin’ in the Dirt: Kids Garden Club Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Bittersweet Branch

Young adults entering grades 6-12 will continue to talk about the popular Hunger Games trilogy in the Young Adult Room at the downtown Mishawaka Library. Stop by and discuss Mockingjay on Friday, August 10 at 2 PM. New participants are welcome. For more information, call 574.259.5277, ext. 218.

Children entering grades 1-6 are invited to have fun gardening at 11 AM. A variety of hands-on activities are planned to beautify the library grounds. Garden gloves are optional, but dress for a mess to plant flowers at the library. Adult caregivers must attend to help with the planting. Space is limited. Registration is required. For more information, call 574.259.0392.

Saturday, August 11

Wednesday, August 15

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown Branch

Mutt March

St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

Bring your dog to the park for some exercise and show your support for Pet Refuge! Organized and sponsored by Pet Refuge. Registration at 8:30 AM, walk at 10 AM. Be sure to bring your pledge sheets along. For more information and to obtain pledge sheets call 574.256.0886 or log onto petrefuge.com.

Monday, August 13

Breastfeeding Class for Moms and Dads at Lakeland HealthCare Lakeland Community Hospital, Niles

Breastfeeding provides the best nutrition for your baby and is a special time for mothers and babies to bond. The class

Lose Weight Free Education Seminars Lakeland Comprehensive Weight Loss Center, Niles

Free seminars to learn about solutions to permanent weight loss. Dr. Michael Schuhknecht and staff members of the Lakeland Comprehensive Weight Loss Center will discuss programs available for losing weight and maintaining a healthy weight for years to come. Free seminar. From 6 to 8:30 PM. For more info, visit lakelandhealth.org/weightloss.

Saturday, August 18

Running Wild: 5K Trail Run & 3K Fun Walk St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

Help raise funds for park projects, including scholarships to help schools cover the THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

cost of transportation to the parks for programs. Dogs on leashes are welcome for the family fun walk. Fun walk will have a nature scavenger hunt. Age division prizes for timed run. Organized by the St. Joseph County Parks Foundation. Pre-registration $20 individual/ $40 family. Day of event: $25 individual/$50 family. To register log on to greatlakeschampionchip.com/schedule.htm.

Wednesday, August 22

Geocaching: The Great GPS Stash Hunt St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

Learn how to use a GPS device on a hightech “treasure hunt” to find caches at the park and throughout the world! Bring a GPS unit if possible, limited loaner units are available. Check out geocaching.com to learn more about the sport. A special geocache course will be set-up just for this event! Registration and payment are required by July 20. (Min. 4; max. 15). From 6 to 9 PM. Cost $3 per person. To learn more, visit sjcparks.org.

Thursday, August 23 2012 River Bend Quilt Show

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown Branch

and the Mishawaka Parks Department and features live shows, street performers, historical demonstrations, kids quest games, music and more. The event covers multiple historical time periods including the English Renaissance (16th and 17th centuries, Vikings (1st and 2nd centuries), The Golden Age of Piracy (17th and 18th centuries), and Fairy Tales. Each area has its own specific shows, vendors and more. Cost ages 5 and under free; Ages 6-12 $7; Ages 13 and up $12; Senior $10; Military w/ID free. For more information, visit www. MichianaRenfest.com.

Beginner Canoe and Kayak Lessons St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

Join certified instructor Ted Beatty for a basic canoe/kayak lesson including safety, paddling strokes, loading/unloading and transporting a canoe/kayak. Fee includes gate fee and use of canoe/kayak, paddle and life jacket. Bring a snack or sack lunch. Registration and payment are required by August 22. (Min. 4; max. 12). Cost $15 per person. From 9 AM to 12:30 PM. For more info, visit www.sjcparks.org.

The 2012 River Bend Quilt Show will begin August 23 and continue through August 25. More than 60 quilts will hang from the banisters and on stands. Made by members of the River Bend Quilters Guild, quilts range from king-sized to small wall hangings and table runners. The quilts represent work by experienced, intermediate, and beginning quilters, mostly from St. Joseph County. Visitors may vote for their favorite quilt. In addition to the show, quilters will be on hand for demonstrations and advice. For more information about the guild or the show, contact Kirsten Campbell at 574.277.3696.

Bonneyville Millers Vintage Base Ball Match

Thursday, August 23

Snite Museum of Art, Notre Dame

Archery Lesson

St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

For ages 12 and up, accompanied by adult. Join a local archery instructor for archery lessons. Equipment provided. Get hands-on experience with all the equipment and enjoy a personalized shooting lesson. Registration and payment are required by August 20. (Min. 4; max. 18). Cost $10 per person. For more info, visit sjcparks.org.

Saturday, August 25

Michiana Renaissance Festival Kamm Island, Mishawaka

The 2nd annual Michiana Renaissance Festival will take place on August 25 and 26 from 10 AM to 6 PM. Hosted by the non-profit group, Entertaining History, Inc. 40 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

Ox Bow County Park, Elkhart

Come see your Elkhart County Vintage Base Ball Team take on the Douglas Dutcher’s in a “gloveless” game of base ball. The “ballists” play in Civil War Era attire with rules from the 1860’s. Fan participation is encouraged. Fun for the whole family! Free (but there is a $3 per car fee to enter Ox Bow Park by vehicle. From 2 to 5 PM. Visit elkhartcountyparks. org/bonneyvillemillers.htm for more info.

Sunday, August 26 Moderni-TEA

Feed your body and your mind at the Snite. Savor delicacies from Les Deux Soeurs Tea Room and Treasures and enjoy stimulating conversation about modernity in art with Curator of European Art Cheryl Snay in the exhibition Cassatt and Beyond: Paintings from the Flint Institute of Arts. Cost $5 members; $10 non-members. From 2 to 4 PM. Visit sniteartmuseum.nd.edu for more info.

Tuesday, August 28 Craft of the Month Group

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Bittersweet Branch

Are you new to the monthly craft group? Are you a regular attendee, but missed one of the monthly crafts? It’s crafter’s choice when the Walk-in Craft of the Month Group meets anytime between 4 to 6 PM. This is your chance to choose from a variety of crafts

presented over the past 16 months, while supplies last. This program is open to teens and adults. Children aged 7 and up may attend with an adult helper. Registration is not required. For more information, call 574.259.0392.

Upcoming September Events Sunday, September 9 Lake Cliff Garden Tour

Lake Cliff Gardens, St. Joseph, MI

Lake Cliff Garden is a 5-acre botanical wonder located on a dramatic cliff overlooking Lake Michigan, with a focus on tropical plants from all over the world. These plants, which are dug each fall and moved to a greenhouse, are supported by over 2500 additional plants that Barbara and Ron Weirich start from seed each year, along with outstanding exotic specimens of trees, shrubs, and perennials that are hardy in a Zone 6 garden. With this almost unlimited plant palette, the garden is designed around a series of garden rooms dedicated to various specialties, with sculptures. Featured three times in Fine Gardening Magazine, Lake Cliff Gardens is an amazing showcase of garden and landscape art at its best. Cost $10. From 9 to 5 AM. For more info, call 269.429.9741.

Saturday, September 15

Michiana Heart Walk: St. Joseph County Heart Walk Robert C. Beutter Park, South Bend

The St. Joseph County Heart Walk is the first of two walks being held in Michiana. The Heart Walk features a free family-friendly health festival that includes health information and giveaways. The Heart Walk raises critical funds for the American Heart Association’s research, educational and awareness programs in Indiana and across the country in the fight against cardiovascular disease, the nation’s No. 1 killer. 9 to 11 AM. Free. For more info, call 574.274.1783. *Please call ahead to confirm times and information.

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

Special Section Sporty Reads For Your Little Ones Tips to Build Your Kidâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Vocabulary

Swimming Lessons Kid Stages We Could Do Without

Making Face Time a Family Priority Play Dates Photography: Classic Image Photography, Granger

The Local Parenting Resource for Expectant Parents and Families with Younger Children

42 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

Suffering From Back or Neck Pain? It's Time to Get Back to Life! Call 574-247-5145 to request a FREE 36-page Home Remedy Book.

574-247-6556 • www.southbendspine.com • 60160 Bodnar Blvd. • Mishawaka MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

M i C H I L D • S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

Story Time

Sporty Reads For Your

Little Ones!

With all the excitement that comes with the summer Olympics, your curious kids likely have sports on the brain! Here are some great children’s books that deal with sports and hobbies your kids might want to learn more about.

Reviewed by Vicky Westphal, Children’s Services Library Assistant and Tina Emerick, Children Services Coordinator Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Public Library

The 2012 London Olympics By Nick Hunter

It’s time for the Summer Olympics! In this book, your child can read about how London was chosen to be the host of the world’s greatest sporting event. Learn about the bidding, planning and preparation, the games involved, and how London hopes to keep the legacy alive! (Ages 8 and up)

Archie, Payton and Eli Manning: Football’s Royal Family By Jeanne Nagle

The Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Public Library offers several books with sport statistics as well as the history of your child’s favorite team and players. Two of the big names in football are Eli and Payton Manning. In the book, “Archie, Payton and Eli Manning: Football’s Royal Family” by Jeanne Nagle, she highlights both the sport and the players, on and off the field. (Ages 10 and up)

The Kingfisher Soccer Encyclopedia By Clive Gifford

“The Kingfisher Soccer Encyclopedia” by Clive Gifford is also a recommended read. This informative book is filled with facts on the rules, skills, teams, legendary players and coaches in the field of soccer. Detailed information, pictures and additional resources, such as books, magazines and websites are included. The reading level for this book is grade 4 and above, but it has an appeal for all ages. Men and women’s team statistics are included, making this a valuable read for anyone interested in soccer. 44 MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

For Horse-Crazy Girls Only By Christina Wilsdon

Equestrian sports are also part of the Olympics. If your daughter wants to find out about the different horse breeds, learn how to care for horses or gain the skills of riding a horse then the book “Horse-Crazy Girls” by Christina Wilsdon is for her. Girls can also find ideas for decorating their room or hosting a horse-themed party. There are even suggestions for the best horse movies to watch. (Ages 7 and up)

Karate Kick By Matt Christopher and Stephanie Peters

“Karate Kick” by Matt Christopher and Stephanie Peters will get your child into the world of karate through the eyes of Cole Richards. Cole is learning to become a green belt, but also learns about jealousy, competition, motivation and most importantly respect. This and other titles by Matt Christopher are great reads for third to fifth graders interested in the world of sports.

Stink and the Ultimate ThumbWrestling Smackdown By Megan McDonald

Is your child just not into physical sports? Join Stink and his alter ego, Shark Hammersmash, in the sixth book of the “Stink” series by Megan McDonald. In “Stink and the Ultimate Thumb-Wrestling Smackdown,” Stink’s parents encourage him to take up a sport after he has been given a poor grade in his physical education class in school. Second grader Stink tries his hand at the sport of thumb wrestling and finds out karate might be a better fit. Younger readers will get a kick out of this book filled with humor and good fun. (Ages 7 and up)

mi Corner Our tips, picks, news and advice.

Tips to Build Your Kid’s

While a fondness for reading can come naturally, for some children, it can be difficult to ge t started, especially with competition from va rious electronics an d toys. But you can encourage a love of reading an d help expand your child’s vocabular y as they grow using these simple tips.

Vocabulary

For Young Children Even very young children can begin to learn new words. Be mindful of talking to them and teaching them the names of objects you encounter each day. Whether you’re running errands, or making dinner, explain to them what you’re doing, and they’re sure to pick up on new vocabulary words. Read often. Simply the act of reading to your child on a regular basis – such as prior to bedtime – can really help to encourage a fondness for reading, as well as improve their vocabulary. Don’t be afraid to stop and explain difficult words to them. Keep your child engaged by asking them to describe different words as you go along. Draw and describe. Ask your child to draw a photo of events that happened throughout their day and to describe each part of the picture. Even very young children will be able to put together a narrative of their daily activities. Storytelling will challenge them to remember the names of certain objects, people and places. Engage on the go. When you’re out running errands, ask your child to describe different objects they can see from the car, such as people, animals, buildings and parks. In this way, you can help them recognize colors, as well as build upon their vocabulary.

For Older Children Once your child is learning their letters and beginning to read full sentences, you can really begin to encourage their vocabulary. Label it. As your child begins to learn to read on their own you can look to items around the house to help support their education. Use index cards or sticky notes to label household items such as “bath tub,” “door” and “floor.” Make it fun. One great way to encourage reading is to get your child involved in vocabulary building and letter recognition. Give your child vocabulary games such as flash cards and word searches that will help further encourage your child to read. Find activities and ideas via “Kidsville News!” and a new word search at kidsvillenews.com each month. Visit the library. Enroll your child in a reading program at your local library. Make sure they are exposed to new books, which will help them continue to develop an extensive vocabulary. Research books. To make sure you know what your child is reading, look to sites that offer suggested book listings for children of various ages such as ReadKiddoRead.com and teachersfirst.com. Ask for a story. Just as a drawing can help encourage your child to build storytelling abilities so too can writing their very own stories. Start by asking them to write a few sentences about their favorite pet, a neighbor, or a family member. You can also encourage them to write letters to grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends as well. MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

M i C H I L D • S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

Mommy & Daddy

Swimming

Lessons By Jane Suter

Little boys are stinky – and it only gets worse in the summer. Imagine an olfactory mixture of worm guts, asphalt and wet dog. So, I make them bathe. They hate this. So I yell, demand and threaten just to get them into the tub each night. What confounds me about their dislike of bathing is their absolute love of swimming. Can anyone explain this to me? I mean, isn’t a swimming pool basically a super humongous bathtub? Anyway, instead of fighting with them about personal hygiene, I take them to our local pool. A lot. Based on our almost daily visits, I’ve noticed a few things:

Beware the Baby Pool!

Nothing says bio-hazard like this shallow infant oasis. And why can’t we just call it what it is: The pee pond. Yes, there’s a reason why the water temperature hovers at a steady 98.6 degrees. Nevertheless, mothers still flock to it. They shyly giggle as their adorable newborns scrunch-up their wee faces and bear down into their swim diapers. Let’s face it; the baby area puts the poo in pool...literally.

It’s Sink or Swim in the Deep End.

The big pool is not much better. I am on high alert the entire time my kids are swimming here. To be honest, I don’t trust that the 16-year-old lifeguard, sunning himself in that oversized highchair, is going to rescue my child if he goes under. So I equip my kids with water wings and flotation devices. But what does it matter? Vigilant as I am, I always end up losing sight of one of my boys. Thus begins my frantic scan across a sea of tiny bobbing heads. I sort by hair color and mentally cross off the good swimmers. Finally I spot him – flailing like a steerage passenger the night the Titanic sank. And the lifeguard? Oh, he’s checking out the babe-a-licious vixen in the bikini.

and four-person raft (complete with oars) you broke your back lugging to the pool today? The ones your children swore they would play with the whole time? They will sit, abandoned, next to your towel. But that discarded plastic cup Suzy found in the parking lot on the way in? That piece of refuse will bring her unending joy for the entire afternoon.

It’s Not a Bathroom. It’s a Science Experiment.

I strongly suspect the sheer number of germs present in the pool bathroom would keep the CDC busy for decades. But when you have to go, you have to go. So I march my crew into the Petri dish, our flip-flops squishing through the papier mache mixture on the floor. After locking ourselves in the stall, I now have to wrestle my son’s bathing suit off him. Not an easy task since it’s suctioned to his skin like an octopus tentacle. However, in one grand heave, it finally comes loose – and falls to the floor. It must now be burned.

The Final Rinse.

Showering at our public swimming pool is the closest I have come to experiencing what a life of incarceration would be like, so I try to get out of there fast. I dump a glob of shampoo on my children’s heads and quickly lather them up. Oddly, despite the vast array of temperature settings on the dial, there are really only two options: iceberg and lava. This actually speeds things up and the next thing you know we’re dodging the rogue, floating Band-aids on our way to the locker room. As I jockey towels to shield our nakedness, while simultaneously navigating dry underwear over tiny wet feet, I begin to reconsider my battle against little boy stink. Maybe my kids are right. Smelling like worm guts isn’t so bad, is it? I mean, compared to the baby pool ...

Inflatable Fun Has a Formula.

I may not be very math-y, but I have found that the degree to which your child bellyaches and cries over bringing a toy to the pool is inversely proportionate to the amount of time they will actually play with said toy. Remember the snorkels, flippers 46 MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

Jane Suter is an award-winning writer and mom of two very energetic boys, one in kindergarten and the other in second grade. Born in Chicago, she is proud of her Midwestern roots.

MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

M i C H I L D • S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

Parenting

Kid Stages We Could Do

t u o h Wit By Meagan Francis

A few years ago, I saw a mom with her first baby, a sweet thing about 9 months old. Nine months old is one of my favorite baby stages. A 9-month-old baby is curious and mobile, chubby and cute, and when you pick them up, they cling to you like a little monkey. “Awww, that’s the best age,” I said, giving her baby’s chubby leg a squeeze. “Isn’t every age the best age?” said the beaming mother. Only too late – after I’d snorted – did I realize she’d been completely sincere. She looked at me quizzically. “Uh, well, not really,” I floundered. “Between a year and 18 months is probably my least favorite age. And then there’s that time right before they turn three; that’s no fun either…” I trailed off, aware that the other mother looked a little uncomfortable with where the conversation was going. Who could blame her? No new mom wants to hear that she might not feel enthusiastic about her child every single day for the rest of her life. Sometimes I think about that mom today and wonder whether she has, by now, run into some stages she’d just as soon never encounter again. Not long after our conversation, her baby entered the 12-18 month phase I so dreaded, a time of whining and grunting and getting into absolutely everything. A year-old baby is too big to carry around easily at a social event, but too little to plop down on the floor. A 15-month-old baby is old 48 MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

enough to know exactly what he wants, but usually too little to tell you what it is. An 18-month old baby has developed certain opinions about the world, from what she likes and dislikes to whether or not she’d like to be buckled into her car seat, and woe to the person who tries to convince her otherwise. They’re all impulse and ability with no self-control or reason. I know mothers who get bored with newborns, looking forward to a time when their baby will be walking, babbling and interacting with them more. Other moms admit that they aren’t “baby people” at all and enjoy their kids most when they’re schoolaged. I, on the other hand, love nothing more than cuddling and smelling and diapering a newborn baby and feel cheated by the fact that the newborn period is gone in what feels like a blink of an eye. It didn’t help that my babies grow so fast that they barely look like newborns at one week old. I adore the sweet gurgling of a 4-month-old, the big-baby solidness of a 9-month old, and the curiosity and independence of a 2-year-old. It’s just that 12-18 month phase that exhausts me every time. I used to try to hide my dirty little secret – that some stages just weren’t my cup of tea. I thought being a good parent meant loving every minute of it, and that included embracing every developmental milestone. But as I added more kids to the mix, I realized that my love affair with certain ages and stages and my aversion to others was pretty consistent from kid to kid. I think it’s a personality thing; I just mesh better with my children at certain ages than others.

With my daughter Clara, I tried to tell myself things would be different. Maybe I could will my way out of my toddler bias. Clara had been a joyously easy small baby; no reason to think she’d be any different as a big baby. I held fast to that belief as we rode out the end of the first year. And then the whining began. Clara spent almost her whole day complaining in some way. She didn’t like when I put her down. Sometimes she didn’t like when I pick her up. She didn’t like the food I gave her. She got mad when I didn’t give her enough food. “No!” became her constant refrain. It was hilarious and endearing in its own way. But it was also maddening. My only comfort was knowing that as quickly as this age of un-reason begins, it will end.

It's not too for earlyanything to shop for Back to Schoolprices ... Prepare without that melt Get the Best selection by shopping early at Once Upon A Child!

your wallet. We $$$ payon the spot for gently Smokin’ hot deals is what we‘re about. used clothing, toys, We pay $$$ on the spot forfurniture gently used kids’ and equipment yo toys,outgrown. furniture and equipment. kidsclothing, have Plus low prices on No appointment needed. everything they now. Walk in with goods, need walk out with cash. Snuggle into that. 5936 Grape•Road • Mishawaka • 574.247.1099 5640 Sunrise Highway Sayville, NY 11782 HOURS: Mon-Sat 10am-8pm • Sun 12pm-6pm 631-244-9400 • www.onceuponachildsayville.com 4024 Elkhart Rd. • Goshen • 574.830.5332 HOURS: Mon-Sat 10am-8pm • Sun 12pm-6pm (Near Dunlap area, by Walmart)

Come and see our new huge expansion at our store in Mishawaka!

Loving your kids doesn’t mean forgetting that you don’t care for changing diapers or endlessly washing (or losing) the spout part on a sippy cup. I smother my toddlers with affection just like my babies and my big kids, but there’s something freeing in being able to think “I love you, but your developmental stage stinks!” At the same time, I think I did the right thing this time around by keeping an open mind. Sometimes anticipation of the thing is worse than the thing itself. I joked about the dreaded toddler months when Clara was a baby, but didn’t spend much time dwelling on how bad it might be or how crazy they might make me. As a result, I didn’t really notice the stage was creeping up on us until we were in the thick of it. I kept a sense of humor and perspective about the whole thing, keeping in mind that this stage can’t last forever, and clinging to the joys – the occasional laughing fits and hugs – to ride me through the whining…and the whining…and the whining.

Contests, events and exclusive offers at your fingertips. OPEN!!! **Notes go here**

Meagan Francis lives in St. Joseph, Michigan and is a mother of five children. She is also the author of the books “The Happiest Mom: 10 Secrets To Enjoying Motherhood” and “One Year to An Organized Life with Baby.”

michianafamilymagazine.com MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

Big Kids M i C H I L D • S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

Making

Face Time a Family

y t i r o i r P

By Amy Allen Clark

When my children were small, it seemed that all they wanted to do was play with me, draw with me and read with me.

that had the hardest time were the two of us grown-ups. The kids took the change in routine surprisingly well.

As they get older, it seems all they want to do is play on the computer, play on the DS and play on the Wii – and not with me?

Do Screen Time Together

What a change it has been to be so low on the activities totem pole! I say this tongue-in-cheek, of course, because I am just as guilty as my kids of making screen time more of a priority than it should be. I could spend hours on my phone checking all of my social networks and being disconnected from the three people that love me most in my life. One evening, I looked around and saw each of us in our respective corners with our screens, and I knew that something had to change. I want my children to have their downtime after school, but I also want us spending time together as a family. I wanted to share with you our solutions for making family time a priority again.

Declare Face Time

When my kids get home from school, it is time for snacks and homework. After that, they are free to do screen time alone until 5 PM. At 5 PM, I declare it, “Face Time!” Face Time is not FaceTime on the iPhone; instead it means that we will have time together as a family until bedtime. It means having a family meal together with great conversation, reading books together, playing a board game, or spending an evening playing outside together. I thought Face Time was a genius idea, but the first night my husband looked at me and said, “So we are all supposed to not be on the computer?” Yes, admittedly, I had to flip my phone upside down because each time the screen popped up I was dying to know what was happening in the world. The two people 50 MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

If we use screen time during our Face Time, it must be all done together. Some evenings we spend Wii bowling together, and other evenings it is a night of wild dancing on our Just Dance game. I will admit that I often request a rousing round of Band Hero so I can sing with my very own Partridge Family. We recently added a new screen time feature to our family that we are absolutely loving. For about seven years now, I have made homemade pizza every Friday night for our evening meal, and we have watched a family movie. In the last few months, we have changed our pizza night to a “Docu-Pizza.” The evening consists of one pizza, one documentary and one great family conversation afterwards. We have exposed the kids to lots of different cultures and watched documentaries about everything from the art of origami to puppetry to a senior citizen dance crew. It has led to amazing discussions and allowed us to use our screen time in a way that benefits our whole family. Screen time done together connects us, and the kids are learning to include us in the gaming fun instead of doing the games on their own.

Use a Screen Time Monitoring System

I find it is much easier to monitor screen time hours during the school year since the kids are in school during the day. The summer months are when screen time can really get out of control. I wanted a way to monitor their screen time, so we decided to create a printable ticket that could be used for just this occasion. These tech tickets have made us all more aware of how much

screen time we are using, and they have been a great way for us to monitor the use. Each child gets one chore ticket and two tech tickets for the week in our house. The chore ticket must be punched before they can start with their first hour of screen time. Tech tickets grant the child one hour of computer or video game time. We do not count television time as tech time in our house. Kids can watch two shows daily on Netflix. (You may recall that we cut our cable television, as I discussed in a past FAMILY Magazine article, so that has really helped us do a better job of not zoning out in front of the television.) A timer is set once the child begins time on the computer or playing a video game, and once it dings, the card is punched for that hour. It is as simple as that!

Are These Systems Working? My husband and I keep shaking our heads as we see the kids getting back to the root of what it means to play together again. Without the screen distractions, they are playing more outside, playing more together, reading and creating more. It makes my heart happy to see them getting back to this again and embracing imaginative play. This is what being a child is about, and this is what being a family is about. I am glad we are rediscovering these simple pleasures again.

We made an agreement that if the child wants to save computer/video game time that they can save and transfer the hours to another day. They cannot, however, cash in on an advance for their ticket. If you like this system, hop on over to the MomAdvice site to snag your free printable tech and chore tickets for your family!

Amy Allen Clark: Foodie. Bookworm. Novice photographer. Java junkie. Knitter & hot glue gun toting extraordinaire. A lover of the simple and family-centered life. Happily living this contented existence within a pennywise budget and showcasing it on momadvice.com.

WELCOME WELCOME OUR NEW PEDIATRICIAN

David E. Stiasny, M.D. Dr. Stiasny joins Dr.’s Daniel Barrett and Melissa Hickey in the Pediatric Department at The South Bend Clinic Granger. Dr. Stiasny graduated from Indiana University with Distinction. He received his medical degree from Indiana University School of Medicine and completed his residency at Children’s Hospital of Michigan. Prior to joining The South Bend Clinic he was a Pediatric Hospitalist at Beaumont Hospital in Michigan. He is a member of the American Academy of Pediatrics and Board Certified by the American Board of Pediatrics. To schedule an appointment with Dr. Stiasny, contact The South Bend Clinic, 574-204-7050. You can also visit us online at www.SouthBendClinic.com.

0 1 2 3

NUMBER 123 NOW SERVING YOU!

MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

M i C H I L D • S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

P lay Dates

While many moms and kids might have back-to-school on their minds, don’t forget that August is still packed with fun activities to do both before and after school begins. Just check out these fabulous activities that will have your kids thrilled it’s August, even if it does mean back-to-school!

Still Time To Sail Away!

Yes, summer break is winding down. With all this back-toschool talk, your kids are likely starting to get a little more sullen and beginning to feel those back-to-school jitters (we can still remember those). But while you’re doing all that back-to-school planning, don’t forget to enjoy the end of summer! One great option to remind the kids that summer isn’t over yet is to visit New Buffalo, Michigan, for Ship N Shore. Starting on Friday, August 10, you and the family can enjoy the largest street fest in Southwest Michigan. Just head over the Whittaker Street and enjoy three days packed with great live music, food, kids’ activities and more! The highlight of the event is watching the floating parade through the harbor when yachts, sailboats and more are transformed into floating pieces of art. The boats are decorated with lights, and the parade is followed by a huge fireworks display over Lake Michigan! It’s a steal of a deal, too. Admission is a $5 suggested donation. You can learn more about all the events and fun activities available by visiting newbuffalo.org. 52 MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

Dog Days of Summer Saturdays

Escape the dog days of summer by heading over to the MishawakaPenn-Harris Library, Downtown Branch, for a variety of activities on August 11. There’s tons of fun stuff going on that day: Paws to Read Children entering grades 1-6 can enjoy a special reading-aloud experience as they read to a canine companion. Children will be paired with Barney, a Saint Bernard, and his handler for one 15-minute session. Starts at 11 AM, and Barney appreciates punctuality, especially when it comes to reading and getting pets and hugs! Walk-in Craft Make no bones about it! All ages are invited to “wag” on over to the Children’s Activity Room anytime from 1 to 4 PM and choose from an assortment of dog crafts. Registration is not required, and the program will continue while supplies last.

Family Movie Enjoy a family movie based on the series of books “The Adventures of Tintin” by Herge at 2 PM. Join Tintin and his trusty dog, Snowy, as they travel in search of a good story which thrusts them into a world of high adventure against the nefarious Red Rockham. Free tickets are required and will be available beginning Wednesday, August 1. For more information on any of the following programs, contact Children’s Services at the Downtown Mishawaka Library or call 574.259.5277, ext. 242.

It’s a Renaissance!

Costumes, games, performers, festival food: We think this looks like a fun family event a kid couldn’t help but love! Visit Kamm Island in Mishawaka on Saturday, August 25, for the 2nd annual Michiana Renaissance Festival! Hosted by the nonprofit group, Entertaining History, Inc. and the Mishawaka Parks Department, the festival has live shows, street performers, historical demonstrations, kids’ quest games, music and more! The event covers multiple historical time periods including the English Renaissance (16th and 17th centuries), Vikings (1st and 2nd centuries), The Golden Age of Piracy (17th and 18th centuries), and Fairy Tales. Each area has its own specific shows, vendors and more. The festival is from 10 AM to 6 PM. Kids ages 5 and under get in free; ages 6-12 get in for $7; ages 13 and up for $12; Seniors for $10; Military with ID get in free. For more information, visit MichianaRenfest.com.

MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

Thank You!

to our Annual Advertising

Magazine Partners

who support FAMILY and our Magazine every single month! These annual advertising partners make it possible to produce this magazine and offer it for free to Michiana Families. Please support these local partners in Michiana! Elkhart General Hospital South Bend Clinic Midwest Orthotics

Advertiser Index: 32 Pearls Family Dentistry

Once Upon a Child

MutualBank

Camellia Cosmetics

Pulse FM/WHME

Once Upon a Child

Creekstone Properties ADV

South Bend Clinic

Menno Travel

Debbie Werbrouckâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

South Bend Clinic / Villing & Co.

32 Pearls Family Dentistry

DTSB, Inc.

South Bend Medical Foundation

Classic Image Photography

Edible Arrangements

South Bend Orthopaedics

Elkhart General

Back Cover

Southhold Dance Theatre

Eye Site Optical

St. Thomas the Apostle School

Goodwill Industries

The Montessori Academy

Mathnasium

Goodwill Industries

Inside Back Cover

Novabella Inc.

Growing Kids

Wagon Wheel Theatre

Premier Arts

Gymnastics Michiana

YMCA-Elkhart

Gymnastics Michiana

Heritage Square Mall

Early Childhood Development Center at

Indiana Backyards

Notre Dame Federal Credit Union

Eye Site Optical Goodwill Industries Heritage Square Mall Lakeland HealthCare

Notre Dame South Bend Medical Foundation

Lakeland HealthCare

Inside Front Cover

Mathnasium

Momadvice.com

Notre Dame Federal Credit Union Novabella Inc.

54 MI CHILD SPECIAL SECTION | AUGUST 2012

3 25

Transitions Dental Company c/o Univ. Meadows 27

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | AUGUST 2012

The little things are important to us. When it comes to your newborn’s health and safety, the little things are probably pretty important to you, too. Which is why we offer a Level 2-B Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, along with certified neonatologists and experienced neonatal nurse practitioners right here in our Special Beginnings Maternity Center. This way, you can be sure that should a situation arise, we’ve got the right people in place, ready to help. Because when it comes to watching over your little one, no amount of caring is too big, or too small.

To schedule a personalized tour of the Special Beginnings Maternity Center, call 574-523-3444.

600 East Boulevard • Elkhart, IN 46514