www.accracare.org
ISSUE 12
VOLUME 31
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How to have the tech talk Keep communication open when it comes to setting boundaries around screen time and online safety.
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Not just noise
Indoor options!
These tot-oriented musical ensembles will hook kids and entertain grownups, too!
White Bear Township and Minnetonka are home to two new play venues for families with cabin fever.
About our cover kid Name: Saraya
Age: 2 1/2
City: Woodbury
Parents: Christopher Barnes and Deanna Laemmle Siblings: Half-sister Eliana, 9 (age 10 in January) Personality: Joyful, social, energetic and curious Favorite toy: First Builders Mega Bloks Favorite book: Sick Simon by Dan Krall Favorite activities: Jumping on our trampoline and playing in our sandbox Favorite foods: Strawberries, chips and guacamole Photos by Tracy Walsh / tracywalshphoto.com
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
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Face-to-face time Board games teach kids valuable skills and give families time to laugh, chatter and uplug.
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Holiday Out & About
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Out & About
8 FROM THE EDITOR
Short lived
The most unlikely scenario in parenting is having it all figured out. 10 CHATTER
Win a ski trip! Lutsen Mountains is giving away a family vacation valued at $500. 12 BABY ON BOARD
Stop counting Keeping score of who’s done what — and how often — doesn’t pay off.
18 TEENS AND TWEENS
iPhone positives
My daughter’s had a mobile phone since fifth grade for a few reasons. 20 GROWS ON TREES
Gifts for teacher
How can we parents possibly repay educators for all they do for our kids? 22 ASK THE PEDIATRICIAN
Bleach for skin?
Used in moderation, this chemical solution can heal skin problems. 24 IN THE KITCHEN
Veg out
Your kids won’t believe how tasty broccoli is roasted.
26 BOOKSHELF
14 TODDLER TIME
I’m with you If you’re struggling to limit screen time, you are so not alone. 16 SCHOOL DAYS
Witching hour 101 It’s not just babies who struggle around the dinner hour. Here’s what to do.
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Holiday joy These seasonal tales are truly heartwarming.
50 FROM OUR READERS
Santa pics
Our readers share their best photos with St. Nick.
FROM THE EDITOR mnparent.com
PUBLISHER Janis Hall jhall@mnparent.com SALES MANAGER AND CO-PUBLISHER Terry Gahan tgahan@mnparent.com EDITOR Sarah Jackson 612-436-4385 • editor@mnparent.com CONTRIBUTORS Eric Braun, Jamie Crowson, Megan Devine Dr. Kristen Hook, Shannon Keough, Tina Mortimer, Amy Sutton Tracy Walsh, Jen Wittes, Jennifer Wizbowski CREATIVE DIRECTOR Sarah Karnas skarnas@mnparent.com PAGE DESIGNER Dana Croatt SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER Valerie Moe CLIENT SERVICES Delaney Patterson 612-436-5070 • dpatterson@mnpubs.com CIRCULATION Marlo Johnson 612-436-4388 • distribution@mnparent.com mnparent.com/find-a-copy ADVERTISING 612-436-4360 • sales@mnparent.com 50,000 copies of Minnesota Parent are printed monthly, available at news stands statewide. Get Minnesota Parent mailed to your home for just $12 a year. Call 612-825-9205 for more information.
Minnesota Parent (ISSN 0740 3437) is published monthly by Minnesota Premier Publications. POSTMASTER send address changes to: MINNESOTA PARENT, 1115 Hennepin Ave. Minneapolis, MN 55403. Minnesota Parent is copyright 2016 by Minnesota Premier Publications. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or part without written permission is prohibited. Address all material to address above.
Parenting hypocrisy? W
elcome to our Technology Issue! Yes, it’s that time of year when we address one of the biggest distractions human children have ever known — digital media. Given our issue theme, I thought this might be a good time to return to the story of my 8-year-old son and his technology use. Maybe you remember how, in our June Issue (mnparent.com/less-tech), I wrote about the success I had in scaling back screen time for my son to 1 to 2 hours per day. (Check out the online safety story in the pages to come for new tech recommendations from the AAP.) As usual, I had it all figured out (or at least under Photo by Tracy Walsh / tracywalshphoto.com control). And, as usual, I was wrong One month after my words hit print, something big happened: Pokemon Go! Then came Just Dance 2016, introduced at my son’s summer-care program. My son loved both tremendously. I was torn. Both of these forms of screen-time were inspiring him (and me) to get up and out and do things: We explored our new neighborhood on bike literally for the first time entirely because of Pokemon Go!, and we even conquered a 10-mile bike ride because of it, too (with a LOT of stopping to catch Rattatas). At home, it was all about the dancing: Instead of sitting like a bump on a log for his requisite 30 minutes of screen time, my kid was telling me to get on my dancing clothes so we could flail our way through Blame and Let’s Groove. I was getting exercise because of screen time. How could I resist that? So I turned myself into a hypocrite and let the screen-time limit more than double. We weren’t right back where we started (unlimited), but it went like all parenting goes: Just when you think you’ve got it figured out, it changes, and your perfect rules/plans/ kids/you have to adjust. I’m happy to say — due to the novelty wearing off — we’re no longer obsessed with the games mentioned above, but I still struggle to force myself to set screen-time limits and stick to them. I’m trying. And I haven’t given up. And I feel good about that. On that note, I want to announce that this will be the last time we use a Technology theme for our December issue. In 2017, we’re going to change our December theme to Travel (formerly our May theme) to help families plan for holiday vacations, spring-break trips and adventures in the year ahead. And we’re changing our May issue to a brand-new theme — Special Needs — a huge topic area we’ve been wanting to explore more deeply for a long time. So Happy Holidays and Happy New Year: See you in 2017!
Sarah Jackson, Editor
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CHATTER
A NEW HOLIDAY TRADITION You’ve heard of The Elf on the Shelf. The 2004 children’s book and doll set has become a beloved, playful tradition among many families. It’s also caused backlash from parents who dislike the concept of a nanny-state elf who spies on kids and evaluates their behavior for gift worthiness. Well, what if you could enjoy the whimsy of an annual holiday tradition without the espionage and consumerism (and nightly hiding duties)? Two Eagan parents — Sean and Catherine Green — have created their own book and character to inspire a new kind of tradition with Adventure Santa. The 12-inch-tall plush doll doesn’t spy, but instead wears hiking boots and carries around a backpack that holds
notes to the kids about things the whole family can do together. Catherine Green said she came up with the idea when she was working crazy hours. She wanted to make special memories, but in her own way, on a realistic schedule. The Greens started by writing down things they could do together as a family, like cutting down their own Christmas tree, decorating, sledding and making cookies. They put those ideas in a little backpack they’d made for a Santa doll. “I pretended those were Santa’s ideas for things we should do during the holiday season and this helped the magic come alive for the kids,” Catherine Green said. “The kids absolutely loved it,” Sean Green said. This holiday seasons, after two years of development (including 50 test families), Adventure Santa is available for sale, along with a hardcover book, which tells the tale of St. Nick’s top elf, Tavi, who creates a doll that allows the man in red to go on virtual adventures. Adventure Santa kits cost $29.99 at adventuresanta.com. He’ll also be for sale at the Mall of America Candy Cane Craft and Gift Expo on Dec. 10 and the Carousel Craft Show on Dec. 17 in Maplewood.
Win a trip! Minnesota Parent is giving away a FREE Winter Family Fun vacation for a family of four at Lutsen Mountains (valued at more than $500). This prize package includes 2 nights lodging, 2 days of lift tickets and 2 days of ski rentals for a family of four, all coinciding with the Family Fun Nights at the Summit Chalet, featuring magic tricks, art projects, face painting, a pizza party, fireworks and live music from bands such as Kitty & Jack, The Teddy Bear Band and The Bazillions. Family Fun Nights include Dec. 16-18; Jan. 20-22; Feb. 10-12; March 24-26. To enter to win, send a photo of your child(ren) playing in the snow to editor@mnparent.com. Families must use the subject line LUTSEN GIVEAWAY and must include the pictured child’s first name, age and city of residence to be entered in the drawing. Deadline: Dec. 31.
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
The perils of scorekeeping “M
y marriage is like The Walking Dead, OK? We’re all just trying to get out alive.” — Paula from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. As every new parent will come to realize, bringing home a new baby is weird. Before the baby, you can do your own thing. Tired? Head off to bed — no one’s stopping you! Want some exercise? Trot on down to the neighborhood yoga studio. Hungry? Take yourself out for a leisurely lunch. Hey, you’ve earned it! After the baby, these things tend to change a bit. Unless you’ve hired a full-time night nurse, you’ll be woken at all the wrong times, and you’ll be tired. As for exercise, there’s always bring-your-own-baby yoga — where you’ll pay $15 to do a few baby massagetype things to your infant until she starts wailing and you spend the rest of the class trying to soothe her in the corner. And you can always take your colicky newborn to a Japanese restaurant, absolutely. Simply have everyone at the table take a turn walking her around the block while she screams. The negihama can wait.
⊲⊲The new normal In short, your life is no longer your own — at least, not in the way it used to be. You’re now suddenly in charge of caring for a small person who can’t feed or clothe herself, who can’t crawl or walk and who can communicate only via her cries. This is a lot of responsibility. As you embrace your new parental duties, you may begin keeping track of various things. In fact, you may be instructed to track various things, such as the number of wet diapers your baby produces in a day, when your baby breastfeeds and so on and so forth. These practices are generally intended to make sure your baby is getting enough food and is developing healthily.
⊲⊲Tallying the workload However, this new habit of tracking various things (feeding schedules, sleep patterns and more) can sometimes encourage an insidious tendency to keep
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
track of other things — like how many times you got up last night with the baby while your partner slept; how many loads of laundry you did last weekend while your partner was reading a book; or how many completely unappreciated meals you prepared while your partner was working late. In other words, there can be a tendency to keep score — who did or didn’t do what, and when, and how often. And it’s a tendency that can lead very quickly to resentment and all those arguments about “stupid” things such as garbage cans, forgotten wet laundry, kitty litter, filthy kitchens and many other scenarios.
⊲⊲What to do? First, notice when you’re keeping score. For example, maybe your blood is boiling because you put the baby to bed every single night. (Evidently your partner can’t be bothered to pitch in once in a while.) When these sorts of thoughts come up, resist the passive-aggressive urge to internalize your discontent and then express it later through sarcasm: “Wow, glad to see you’ve been taking care of important business on Facebook while I’ve been dealing with the baby for the last two hours.” Instead, consider that these thoughts are expressing an unmet need and then figure out what you can do to address it.
This new habit of tracking various things can sometimes encourage an insidious tendency to keep track of other things — things like how many times you got up last night with the baby while your partner slept.
BABY STUFF
Soft-block toy ⊲⊲Babies love tags! What’s up with that? Satisfy your infant’s fixation with a city-themed soft block from Rose & Rex, which includes four tag-like tabs with holes just right for babies’ fingers (plus an actual tag). Locales so far include London, New York, Brooklyn, Paris, Tokyo, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Seattle and Sydney. All the blocks — made with organic cotton, water-based inks and a corn-derived biodegradable filling — feature iconic imagery from each city and an interior jingle bell that tinkles musically with even the slightest movement. $25 • roseandrex.com
For example, maybe you’ve had a long day and cleaning up the kitchen is going to push you over the edge. Instead of making some snippy comment — “What do you think I am, your maid?” — or sighing dramatically while you do it yourself, seething not-so-silently, consider simply stating what you need: “Hey, I’m exhausted. It would be really great if you could clean up the kitchen tonight.” For those of us who grew up suppressing our true feelings and pretending that everything was just fine, asking for what we want can feel daunting if not impossible. But seriously, give it a try. It’s good for you, good for your relationship and good for your kids, too.
Prairie Care MNP 0516 H4.indd 1
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Shannon Keough lives in Minneapolis with her husband and two children. Send questions or comments to skeough@mnparent.com. Stages Theatre MNP 1216 H4.indd 1
11/7/16 4:25 PM
mnparent.com • December 2016
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Looking up I
recently took a walk around Como Lake in opposition of typical traffic flow. Not only did I see the knockout fall colors from another angle, but I also looked upon more faces. Intrigued, I actually made an effort to smile and nod — maybe say hello — to each and every person (and dog) I passed. Even if I felt shy, even if the passerby looked grumpy, I smiled. It was kind of amazing how my spirit elevated with so much eye contact, so much exchange, so much, “I see you, too.” I was also thinking about this month’s column for the Technology Issue.
⊲⊲Screen at your side Truth be told, I’ve been putting off talking to you about screen time, Toddler Parent. Because what can I say that hasn’t already been said? What can I say that doesn’t sound nagging or insufferably superior? You, my dears, are the first generation to have babies and toddlers through an omnipresence of pocket media — weather, news, sports, snark, a virtual high school reunion, misogyny, rage, Pokémon, offshore casinos, all on your body, at your fingertips, lighting up your pretty face ALL THE TIME. The benefits are obvious. A 75-plus-minute bedtime struggle can be eased with a quick “Why did I just read that?” escape into Hello Giggles. Need a soothing lullaby on command?
Done. Looking for 1,000 Minneapolis moms in the exact same parenting stage as you? Easy. Modern parenting technology can be a Godsend.
⊲⊲The rise of the app But, if I may sound about 500 years old and a little bit like a know-it-all, I have to tell you that my firstborn is now 12. I didn’t have a smartphone for her infancy or toddlerhood. And it was awesome. I looked at her; I sat restless in the dark for minutes 74, 75 and 76 — alone with my own thoughts. I noticed the smell of my daughter’s hair after the bath and the feeling of her soft, squishy arm on mine as it became heavy with sleep. Yes, I’m aware that those pleasures can also be enjoyed while playing Cooking Fever and Instagramming the pictures you took of that smiling lunatic at Como Lake. That’s me, looking down at an electronic little device more than I’d like to admit. Yes, I, too, hand my iPhone over to my kids — their brains and eyes and hearts all still developing — while we’re all waiting for
TODDLER STUFF
Locally crafted toys ⊲⊲During research for our annual Minnesota Parent Toy Test, we came across a local company — DoodleTown Toys of Big Lake, established in 1972 — that produces beautiful, handcrafted wooden toys. Michael and Linda Poisson use northern white pine to create their toys, which feature signature smooth edges thanks to painstaking sanding and routing. We loved the school bus (found at Moss Envy, Minneapolis) for a stocking stuffer. If the grandparents need gift ideas, you might suggest a ToyTote gift set ($49.95), which includes eight vehicles in a bag, lab-tested safe for all ages. $7.95 • doodletowntoys.com
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
food at a restaurant I’m mindful, I’m careful. I’m thinking about this, I’m talking about this. But I’m still a part of this. As I bounced and bubbled and spread good will around Como that day, I was listening to my iTunes playlist, while also (sigh) trying to hatch an ever-loving Pokémon egg — like it was my job.
ATTENTION WOMEN 21-33: Would You Consider Being an Egg Donor?
The Center for Reproductive Medicine is seeking women between 21 and 33 years of age to donate eggs for couples who cannot otherwise achieve pregnancy. You will be compensated for your time and dedication.
⊲⊲Zero hours a day While I could tell you that the recommended amount of screen time for ages 18 months and younger is ZERO — and the recommended amount above age 2 is now just ONE HOUR a day (according to new recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics) — I know that the reality for families can be quite different. It was true for me, even WAY BACK in 2006 when all I had to contend with was an Elmo fixation and what craziness my tot would eventually come across on the big scary desktop computer with the fancy new DSL modem. What I really want to tell you, instead, is that I’m with you. You’re the guinea pigs. The moon walkers. The new normal. I’m with you as you make these choices, as you struggle to look up instead of down. As you perhaps decide to put your phone in another room (I know … bananas) while you sleep, because you’re parenting a toddler and you need your rest that badly. I’m with you as you both lap up and mistrust instant gratification. I’m with you as you realize that satisfaction is harder to come by these days. And with gratitude and love and solidarity, I want to remind you to walk the wrong way around the lake, every once in a while.
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Jen Wittes is a freelance writer and mother of two who lives in St. Paul. Send questions or comments to jwittes@mnparent.com. Learn more about her work at jenwittes.com.
mnparent.com • December 2016
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The witching hour I
’ve often referred to the time between after-school pickup and dinner as “the witching hour.” Especially with my youngest children, the time between 4 and 5 p.m. is often the most difficult time of the day. After a long day, my young children crave my attention — and I want to relax and spend time with them. But our reality is that dinner needs to be prepared, the dog needs to get out and I don’t have fairy godmother who is going to wave a magic wand and get it all done for me each day. The witching hour isn’t going away, so we as parents just have to be smart about how we go about this time of day with our children. Over the years I’ve learned these valuable lessons, which have helped make the transition to home smoother:
⊲⊲Anticipate Know that this time can be a challenge, and do what you can to adjust your schedule so that it isn’t packed full of errands with children in tow. I try to run quick errands on my lunch break, if I can, instead of after work. It also helps me to set a meal plan for the week (ideas for meals sketched out for the week, along with all the ingredients for those meals on hand). This takes some thought and planning, typically on the weekends, but it can be a sanity saver for busy weeknights.
⊲⊲Acknowledge your own needs It took me a while to figure out that I had to address my own witching-hour needs before I could be the mother I wanted to be for my children after a full day of work. For me, I’ve found it’s best to schedule a little pause between the end of my day as a kindergarten teacher and the start of my afternoon after-schooling my own children. Even a few intentional moments to myself on a quiet commute or a short break for a bit of aromatherapy or calming music can help me to transition from work to home. ⊲⊲Reconnect
Without getting caught up or worrying about the tasks ahead, I try to connect with my children for at least 10 minutes, working to be fully present, before I start my responsibilities of home. I know this mindful connection is beneficial for me and my children.
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
⊲⊲Help your child calm down
Encourage your child to participate in some relaxing activities to decompress after school. On weeknights when I’m preparing dinner, my youngest kids may be found at our family table decompressing (and having fun!) with some sensory activities such as playing with balls of playdough or running their hands through shaving cream on a tray. Other simple activities such coloring or painting, or working on sticker books and mazes, are ideal ways for young children to decompress and stay occupied while you’re nearby, working to make dinner. Playing some calming music can set the tone nicely as well.
SCHOOL-AGE STUFF
Hot new toy ⊲⊲Your kid wants LEGOs for the holidays: Again. Had enough? We highly recommend the latest iteration of building toys from Lauri as an alternative. Lauri’s new Action-Stackers Big Builder Set includes new joint connectors that allow children to build out (instead of just up). New spinning connectors can be used to create wheels and other features with movement. Our LEGO-loving 8-year-old home tester played with this set for hours during a recent weekend. There’s also a smaller set for $25.99. $40.99 • ABC Toy Zone of Burnsville, Chanhassen, Rochester
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Megan Devine is an elementary school teacher who lives with her husband and four children in Northeastern Minnesota. Follow her on Instagram @megtdevine. Write her at mdevine@mnparent.com.
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612-825-9205 • mnparent.com/campfair
My daughter’s iPhone T
hree years ago, I reluctantly bought my then-fifthgrade daughter her first cell phone. We were new to the state and I didn’t have the comfort of known friends/neighbors to count on if a soccer practice ended early, or if I was running late to pick her up from school. I broke with my own firm belief that no elementary schooler should need his or her own mobile phone. But I made that rule when I was in a place I already knew how to get around in and a city my daughter knew well — and we had a big support system in place. I remember feeling overwhelmed exploring all the available apps and trying to decide which ones I felt comfortable with. Honestly, I didn’t really like that she could have the Internet at her fingertips. I’m not what you’d call a screen queen. (To this day, all the bedrooms in our house are free of computers and TVs.) Well, this fall, my daughter started the eighth grade and I’ve discovered an appreciation for that iPhone that I never would have expected:
⊲⊲We’re always connected I absolutely love being able to text my daughter when I know it’s been an especially rushed morning or if she’s worried about a big test that day. If I was the one who was rushed — and just want a re-do — I can text her quickly to tell her I’m proud of her. And I can always send a text that tells her, “You can do it!” when she’s nervous about a test. I’m also not afraid to admit, I’ve used our mobile connection to text-yell, too. (I can’t be the only one!) You know the message: I just saw your grade in bio. Why didn’t you turn that assignment in? Also, maybe best of all, there are times she’s used
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her phone to ask me questions that maybe — face to face — would’ve otherwise been too hard for her. And she’s even been known to ask me about my day if her friends aren’t on the bus.
⊲⊲Heroes in our midst My girl’s an athlete. She’s both a soccer player and a ski racer in training. She loves to follow the players of both the WNST (Women’s National Soccer Team) and skier Lindsey Vonn. Because of her phone, she knows what her favorite sports stars like to eat for breakfast as well as some of their detailed workout schedules. What she’s learned online has even played a role in how she approaches her commitment to her own sports. When she was in elementary school, I would drag her along on light runs, telling her it would make her a better soccer player. She would be on the verge of tears, complaining of side aches. Fast forward to age 13: She let me know, just last week: “I’d like to start running on the weekends; for me to keep up at soccer, I need to keep up my running; it will help my racing, too.” Seeing her role models on social media has made it OK for her to be unlike the cover girls of Teen Vogue or Seventeen. She likes seeing physically tough, strong women reaching their goals wearing ponytails, not mascara. She’s isn’t comfortable with short jean shorts and stringy summer tanks. Her phone shows her that sport shorts and muddy ankles are OK. She can be herself.
⊲⊲Learning responsibility My daughter has a better sense of time and scheduling, thanks to the phone in her pocket. She’s aware of when her activities start and stop. On her own, she’s figured out how much time she needs to get ready in the morning and still feed the dog and make her lunch. I don’t even have to tell her when to
TEEN STUFF
A teen-safe show ⊲⊲“Watching TV with your teens presents all kinds of pitfalls: out-of-the-blue raunchy sex scenes, a surprise bloodbath (Game of Thrones, anyone?) and other awkward moments you never wanted to share with your kids.” So says Common Sense Media’s TV Editor, Polly Conway, who recommends 10 teen-safe shows to bridge the gap at tinyurl. com/teen-parent-shows. Our favorite is the riveting Netflix Original Series, Stranger Things. This retro sci-fi mystery, with a second season coming out in 2017, will have you binge watching as a family in no time. Warning: There’s some mild cursing. Get the details in the full review of the series (rated by parents and kids as safe for ages 13 and older) at commonsensemedia.org.
walk to the bus. She knows her schedule and keeps it on her own. Her soccer team has an ongoing group text. They text each other what color of socks they’re wearing and to remind each other to remember their extra jerseys. In the middle of those conversations, you can see them pumping each other up for their games as they ride in their separate cars to the soccer field. I know there’s a lot that’s scary about cell phone usage and teens. But, in my family, it’s allowing my kiddo to grow up in ways I couldn’t have predicted a few years back. And it doesn’t hurt that she can pull up a map for me on our drive to the soccer field — because sometimes, I’m still figuring out where I’m going. Jennifer Wizbowski lives in Excelsior with her husband, and daughter and son, ages 13 and 15. Send comments, questions and story ideas to jwizbowski@mnparent.com.
A guide to teacher gifting W
hat’s that heavy weight you’re carrying over your shoulder? A big bag of gifts — or your holiday stress? Wow, it’s heavy this year. And why not? There’s plenty to stress about: Who will get mad if you don’t split up your family visiting time just perfectly? Will everything ship in time? Should you let Grandpa give the kids more video games? How will you seat that huge group for the holiday dinner? And of course: What on earth should you get your children’s teachers? You probably can’t eliminate all the anxiety from the season. (Hey, why mess with tradition?) But by embracing a few simple guidelines, you can at least lighten the load.
⊲⊲What’s the right gift? Giving to teachers can be a source of stress and confusion. Suggestions I found online were all over the board, including at least one writer who recommends giving lavish cash tips.
Most folks want to recognize the efforts of their children’s teachers. But what’s appropriate will depend on your school, the age of your kids and other factors. To help find clarity, I asked the “Manners Guru to the Youth of America” — Alex J. Packer — a psychologist, educator and author of many books for adults and kids including How Rude! So what about those lavish cash tips? “Absolutely not,” Packer said. “While we all enjoy being gifted with money, it is totally inappropriate in this context.” However, Packer said, it’s almost always appropriate to express one’s gratitude and warm feelings with a gift. “This is especially true for parents whose children are in the elementary grades, where kids have one primary teacher for the entire year whose ministrations can have a profoundly positive impact on a child’s development,” he said.
⊲⊲It’s the thought that counts A good general guideline is this: Be generous, but stay within your budget. A gift card for iTunes credit turns the crassness of a “tip” into a gift of music. A restaurant gift card can provide an excuse to have dinner out, even if it doesn’t cover the entire tab. You can always ask other parents what they’re giving to get a feel for what’s appropriate, but don’t feel pressure to keep up with peers. After all, it’s still true that it’s the thought that counts. As Packer reminds us, many of the best gifts cost nothing. “The most treasured gifts are often handmade or heartfelt. A child and parents, as a joint gift, could each write sincere notes
ETIQUETTE
Book for teens ⊲⊲Billed as a Teen Guide to Good Manners, Proper Behavior and Not Grossing People Out, Alex J. Packer’s book, updated in 2014, is billed as a “wacky, comprehensive, and insightful etiquette book that shows teens how to use good manners to build fulfilling relationships, get what they want out of life, feel good about themselves and save society from a total manners meltdown.” $23.99 • freespirit.com
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WANT MORE IDEAS?
of appreciation,” he said. “In the United States, teachers do not receive anything near the respect, gratitude and support they deserve.” Parents — who take the time to think and handwrite their thanks (yes, handwrite, not email or text); who include anecdotes and descriptions of how much little Liam or Emma blossomed under their care; who send notes throughout the year, rather than just on obligatory occasions — can deliver far more value than a storebought, generic gift, Packer said.
⊲⊲What about a group gift? If a parent in your child’s class is organizing a collective gift, this can be a nice way to not only make things easier on yourself, but also potentially provide something really nice for the teacher. Packer said: A teacher may much prefer to receive, say, a weekend getaway package rather than 18 bottles of eau-de-fancy-perfume, 13 scarves and 11 boxes of candy. If you’re offered the chance to contribute to a class gift, you don’t have to give the suggested amount. You can give less, and you don’t need to explain yourself if you do. It’s also fine to opt out of the class gift if you prefer. Just thank the gift organizers for the
Minnesota Parent’s own School Days columnist Megan Devine, a Minnesota elementary schoolteacher and mother of four, tells all in her article — What teachers really want for the holidays — at mnparent.com/ teacher-gifts.
invitation to participate and let them know that you’ll be giving something directly to the teacher.
⊲⊲What if money is tight? You have plenty of options. If you have a unique profession or passion, consider a gift such as a free concert (if you’re a musician), a print (if you’re an artist) or a tennis lesson (if you’re a coach). A low-cost gift that shows attentiveness to the teacher’s interests or background will also be appreciated — a wacky tie to a teacher who covets them, for example, or a CD to a jazz lover. The bottom line? The best gift is one that shows thought, caring and emotional investment. Packer said: “Thus, a child’s card or drawing — a pictorial hug — has more meaning to a teacher than a box of chocolates and a store-bought card.” Eric Braun is a Minneapolis dad of two boys and the co-author of The Survival Guide for Money Smarts: Earn, Save, Spend, Give, a book for young readers. Send comments or questions to ebraun@mnparent.com.
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mnparent.com • December 2016
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Kristen Hook
How to soothe dry winter skin W
hite snow, bright sun and dry skin — it’s wintertime in Minnesota! This time of year, typically November through March, people of all ages struggle with skin issues. And for kids, winter can be a particularly uncomfortable time of year. In fact, roughly 20 percent of babies develop dry, sensitive skin, and older kids face special skin challenges as well. Fortunately there are some basic techniques parents can use to help keep kids more comfortable. Lukewarm water: Although it’s cold out, it’s important for all ages to avoid taking hot, steamy baths. Hot water can actually dry out skin in the long run. Instead, bathe daily with lukewarm water for 5 to 10 minutes. Non-soap cleansers: It sounds counterintuitive, but non-soap cleansers are a great option for people with sensitive skin. They have lower pH levels and are gentle on skin because they’re more likely to leave behind natural oils. (What is soap? Find out at tinyurl.com/soap-mnp.) While we don’t endorse any specific products, a couple of examples include Cetaphil cleanser and Aquaphor hair and body wash. Pat dry and moisturize: For kids with sensitive skin, even rubbing a towel on the skin can exacerbate their condition. After your child’s bath or shower, pat her dry, and then, within three to five minutes, apply a creambased moisturizer. Cream-based moisturizers typically come in jars and are thicker than lotions, which often come in squeeze bottles. Examples include Cetaphil, CeraVe and Eucerin creams.
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⊲⊲Eczema One of the most common conditions we see in the dermatology clinic is called eczema (pictured below). It’s caused by an impaired skin barrier due to dysfunctional proteins in the skin. By using these techniques, you can help repair your child’s skin barrier, which will then prevent the development of rashes and itching caused by eczema: Bleach, it’s what’s for winter: Older kids in Minnesota face a unique set of skin issues stemming from a popular yet unassuming activity: Hockey! Sweating under hockey gear can cause skin problems like eczema and related skin infections. Kids are most susceptible when protective pads make contact with the skin. Surprisingly, regular household bleach is both anti-inflammatory and anti-bacterial. One of the best preventions is taking a “pool bath” — ¼ cup bleach added to a full bathtub. Bathing daily or every other day for at least 5 minutes
It sounds counterintuitive, but non-soap cleansers are a great option for people with sensitive skin. in a diluted bleach bath reduces the bacterial load on their skin, and can heal minor skin infections and rashes. Be sure to rinse off the bleach water after, and apply a cream-based moisturizer at least twice daily, too. Parents might also consider soaking or washing hockey pads in diluted bleach water as well, to prevent reinfection. If your child has persistent itchy rashes in these areas, talk with his or her doctor. Sunscreen: Not just for snowbirds: You can’t avoid the sun in the winter — especially on the slopes. All ages should apply sunscreen to exposed skin on the face, neck and hands during outdoor activities. SPF 30 or greater is recommended by the American Academy of Dermatology. Sunscreens containing zinc oxide and titanium dioxide block the sun’s rays without being absorbed into the skin, and are generally recommended for people with sensitive skin. Even if it’s cloudy, people can still receive 80 percent of the sun’s harmful rays, so it’s best to maintain proper protection — even during winter. Dr. Kristen Hook is an assistant professor in the Department of Dermatology at the University of Minnesota Medical School. She practices at the University of Minnesota Health Pediatric Dermatology Clinic at the Masonic Children’s Hospital and subspecializes in pediatric dermatology. Learn more at dermatology.umn.edu.
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IN THE KITCHEN
VEGGIE POWER!
By Sarah Jackson
Trying to get kids to eat broccoli has long been a parenting cliché. But not anymore. Today’s foodie parents don’t boil or steam veggies into oblivion. They know the power of roasting veggies quickly at high temperatures to bring out their sweetness. Not in the Candied Broccoli Club yet? Try this recipe. If you’re already a veggie-roasting pro (and have adventurous young eaters), try the variations, all perfected in America’s Test Kitchen.
ROASTED BROCCOLI INGREDIENTS
DIRECTIONS
1¾ pounds broccoli (one large bunch with multiple heads) 3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil ½ teaspoon salt ½ teaspoon sugar Freshly ground pepper, to taste Lemon wedges (optional)
Place a rimmed heavy-duty baking sheet in the oven and heat the oven to 500 degrees. Cut broccoli into bite-size pieces. Florets should be cut in half to maximize the flat surface area of each piece. This will allow for more browning and caramelization. Peel the thick stalks with a vegetable peeler and cut them into bite-size pieces, too. (This is extra trouble, but is worth it.) Put broccoli in large bowl and drizzle with oil and toss well until evenly coated. Sprinkle with salt, sugar and pepper, and toss to combine. Remove sheet from oven and quickly (and carefully) transfer broccoli to the baking sheet. Spread the pieces out into even layer, placing flat sides of broccoli pieces down. Return sheet to oven and roast until stalks are well browned and tender and florets are lightly browned, 9 to 11 minutes. Transfer to platter and serve immediately with lemon wedges.
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VARIATIONS Garlic Stir 3 minced garlic cloves into oil before drizzling it over prepared broccoli in Step 1. Shallots, Fennel Seeds and Parmesan While broccoli roasts, heat 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil in 8-inch skillet over medium heat until shimmering. Add 3 thinly sliced shallots and cook, stirring frequently, until soft and beginning to turn light golden brown, 5 to 6 minutes. Add 1 teaspoon coarsely chopped fennel seeds and continue to cook until shallots are golden brown, 1 to 2 minutes longer. Off heat, toss roasted broccoli with shallots, sprinkle with shaved Parmesan cheese and serve immediately.
Olives, Garlic, Oregano and Lemon Omit pepper when seasoning broccoli in Step 1. While broccoli roasts, heat 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, 5 thinly sliced garlic cloves, and 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes in 8-inch skillet over mediumlow heat. Cook, stirring frequently, until garlic is soft and beginning to turn light golden brown, 5 to 7 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in 2 tablespoons finely chopped pitted black olives, 1 teaspoon minced fresh oregano and 2 teaspoons lemon juice. Toss roasted broccoli with olive mixture and serve immediately.
Source: Adapted from America’s Test Kitchen 100 Recipes: The Absolute Best Ways to Make the True Essentials
BOOKSHELF
Holiday joy! By Sarah Jackson
It’s almost winter and the holidays are near: What better time could there be to snuggle up and read? Check out the following titles, all new this year, that help celebrate the season.
Maple & Willow’s Christmas Tree These two adorable, sometimes snarky sisters — captured, as usual, in gorgeous drawings by author-illustrator Lori Nichols — are back in a holiday tale that explores yet another life challenge: Allergies! After finding the perfect holiday tree, the family gets home only to realize one of the girls is allergic to the conifer they’ve just plucked from the forest. Can Christmas be saved by the other sister, despite her exasperation? Yes, and the outcome is truly heartwarming. Ages 3–5 • $16.99
The Biggest Smallest Christmas Present Giving the perfect gift isn’t easy — sometimes even for Santa! Pixie-like Clementine isn’t just small for her age. She’s so little, she actually takes her baths in a teacup and sleeps in a matchbox. Every year, Santa brings Clementine and her brother amazing toys, but they’re always too big for Clementine to even hold. She must figure out how to show Santa who she is, despite years of frustrating setbacks during the holidays. Well, spoiler alert, she does, and Santa nails it with an incredibly thoughtful, ideal gift. Ages 3–5 • $16.99
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The Great Spruce ST O even louder when he screamed,
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The tall man turned off the saw. A breeze blew
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was terribly loud. But Alec was
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“
whispering a sigh of relief. “You don’t have to cut this tree down,” Alec said. He was shaking and felt so many eyes on him, but when he found his grandpa’s face in the crowd, he knew. “We can dig it up! You can borrow the tree instead!”
P!
Alec loves to climb trees, especially the big spruce on his family’s farm. What happens when the city wants to cut it down to make it an official holiday tree? Alec and the tree go on a remarkable journey in which he discovers the power of courage, creativity and conservation. ”
Active Kids Association of Sport
Ages 5–8 • $17.99
Christmas Fun This Berenstain Bears sticker and activity book — just the thing for long winter-break days and epic car rides to Grandma’s — includes puzzles, mazes, crosswords, activity pages and 50 reusable stickers, featuring Christian as well as secular holiday themes. Papa, Mama, Brother, Sister, Honey and the rest of the Bear Country gang come to life on 32 full-color pages.
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By Jen Wittes
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Tech safety 101 how to navigate the ever-changing, app-happy world of today’s digital natives.
T
tech safety 101
The group of parents now raising tweens is the last to grow up — basically — without the Internet. The good news is that, having received our first email addresses on dinosaur systems as college students, we DO know how the web works. We all have Facebook (well almost all of us), plus most of its cousins. We’re hooked on getting answers to questions instantly as well as the ease of texting versus calling or — oh, please — talking face to face. We know, too, of the web’s dark corners — limitless pornography, angry gamers, false information, lurkers and trolls. This puts today’s parents in a crazy sort of limbo: I get it, I use it, I’m scared to death of it when it comes to my kids. There’s also inappropriate content, predators, cyberbullying and technology addiction. And that’s not to mention the risk of growing up without knowing how to communicate verbally and always needing to know an answer or order that product — instantly, now, yesterday, if possible.
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What’s a parent to do?
Tips for parents
While you can and should limit use of the Internet in a way that’s age-appropriate and encourages other activities — such as participating in sports, reading books and playing outside — you can’t keep your child from going online forever. In fact, complete avoidance could do more harm than good. “Parents shouldn’t focus on instilling fear of the Internet in the child. Instead, start a conversation about technology and the Internet in today’s world,” said Karina Hedinger, a training and education coordinator for the Minnesota Crimes Against Children Task Force, a group led by the Minnesota Bureau of Criminal Apprehension. Much like your family rules for exploring the neighborhood, true online safety comes from preparation and communication. (Check out the AAP’s new screentime recommendations on Page 32.)
Don’t freak out. Teaching your kids to fear the Internet isn’t going to keep them safe.
December 2016 • mnparent.com
Do talk. Discuss the proper use of websites and what behaviors are inappropriate. Discuss the dangers in a nonthreatening way. Ask. Get your kids talking, too, so you’re not just in boring lecture mode. What do you most like to do online? What if someone online asked you to meet? Befriend! Sure, you can have a Facebook or Instagram account … if you make me your first friend. Be a watchdog. “Monitor, monitor, monitor. Monitor what your children are doing on all technology. Have daily conversations about being safe and keeping information safe,” Hedinger said. Be aware that you can set up “restrictions” on various devices (under Settings) to block or allow specific websites or types of content. You can also set blanket permis-
sions based on age ranges. Also know that the top three internet browsers — Mozilla Firefox, Google Chrome and Apple Safari — offer settings and add-ons to help make your kids’ online experience’ more age-appropriate. There are even kid-safe browsers for a variety of age ranges. (See Page 33 to learn more.) Limit locations. Keep the family computer in a communal space in the home. Insist that all phones go to charge or “rest” in a designated location at a certain time each night (not your kid’s bedroom). Get an all-access pass. Though most parents wouldn’t read a child’s diary (at least not without cause for concern), many parents today reserve the right to read their kids’ phones each night after they’re placed in a designated “rest” location. Why? A diary is private by nature, and one might argue that everyone is entitled to his or her own private thoughts. But when it comes to living life on Instagram — where children can easily “go public” with things that perhaps should be private — the rules are bit different.
Resources Software: Netnanny.com is a popular site that also offers parentalcontrol software, used to protect kids from pornography, online predators, cyberbullying and other dangers. Explore: Curious about a game, movie or app your child wants to try? Check out ratings, reviews and parent comments at commonsensemedia.org. Safety tips: Netsmartz.org, a program of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, provides ageappropriate resources to help teach children how to be safer online and off. iPad primer: The Student and Family iPad Handbook (a PDF document) is a guide for families and students in Saint Paul Public Schools who receive iPads during the school year. Learn more at personalizedlearning.spps.org/handbook.
mnparent.com • December 2016
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tech safety 101 Phone reading not only keeps parents involved, but it also helps kids practice better behavior (or self-censoring) if they know Mom or Dad might take a peek. Research and explore. The list of apps you should know (and perhaps even know how to use) is honestly too long to name and goes beyond what you might think (SnapChat, Tinder, Musical.ly, Kik and the like). Did you know there are actually apps to hide apps? Yep. And there’s also a whole language developed to keep parents clueless. Deep breath. It’s going to be OK. But do study up! Talk to other parents as often as you can (ideally with kids a bit older than yours) and make friends with commonsensemedia.org, an indispensable website and app for evaluating all media. Think beyond your home. Which friends have smartphones? Which friends use SnapChat? Would your child’s friends be willing to create an account in your child’s name to get around your rules? What are the rules at the neighbors’ house, where your kid spends half his time? Make your expectations clear. Setting up formal house rules can help you stand firm in your decisions around digital media. Check out the new, free Family Media Plan tool from the American Academy of Pediatrics — at healthychildren.org — for help creating written guidelines for your entire family. If your child is receiving a smartphone this year for the holidays, you might want to customize one of the many mobile phone contracts online such as those at connectsafely.org and joshshipp.com as well as Gregory’s iPhone Contract written by author Janell Burley Hofmann for her 13-year-old son. Hofmann is the author of iRules: What Every Tech-Healthy Family Needs to Know About Selfies, Sexting, Gaming and Growing Up (janellburleyhofmann.com).
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The AAP’s latest screen-time update The American Academy of Pediatrics recently announced new recommendations for children’s media use, including a reduction in maximum daily screen time for ages 2 to 5 from 2 hours to a maximum of 1 hour. Other recommendations include: Children younger than 18 months: Avoid use of screen media other than video-chatting. Parents of children 18 to 24 months of age who want to introduce digital media should choose high-quality programming, and watch it with their children to help them understand what they’re seeing. Ages 2 to 5 years: Limit screen use to 1 hour per day of high-quality programs. Parents should co-view media with children to help them understand what they are seeing and apply it to the world around them. Ages 6 and older: Place consistent limits on the time spent using media, and the types of media, and make sure media does not take the place of adequate sleep, physical activity and other behaviors essential to health. Designate media-free times together, such as dinner or driving, as well as media-free locations at home, such as bedrooms. Have ongoing communication about online citizenship and safety, including treating others with respect online and off
How to safety-tweak your kids’ web browser The top three internet browsers — Mozilla Firefox, Google Chrome and Apple Safari — offer settings and add-ons to help make your kid’s online experience more age-appropriate. Find step-by-step instructions for setting up Google SafeSearch and for customizing your kid’s browser at tinyurl.com/browser-tweaks. Read about 11 kid-safe browsers (ranging from as Zoodles for ages 3 and up to Google Scholar for ages 15 and older) at tinyurl.com/kid-safe-browsers.
sync in your pajamas? If the answer is “no,” reevaluate your public social media “brand.”
Tips for teens and tweens Be discrete. The saying goes, “If you would feel uncomfortable with something plastered on a billboard, don’t share it on the Internet.” Personal information should never be shared in public forums. Turn off location services for most apps, and set them to “On While App is Running” for things that make sense, like navigation programs. Be private. Gaining scores of fans and followers might feel like popularity — but it’s really just broadcasting a bunch of stuff that could embarrass you someday. Would you invite your whole block over to watch you lip
Create a Family Media Plan The AAP, as part of its new recommendations, also launched a free online Family Media Plan tool to help families set guidelines for each child, with suggested items based on the AAP’s age-specific recommendations, plus space to add or substitute your family’s own rules. You can specify screen-free areas and situations for your household, device curfews, recharge areas and how you’ll consume media as a family, including what you’ll avoid.
Know real people. You should be friends with someone in real life before being friends online. And you should spend screen-free time with your real-life friends. Trust your gut. If something feels scary, weird or inappropriate, it probably is. If you feel tempted to hide something on a technological device from your parents, you probably shouldn’t. Tell. If you see something inappropriate, violent, suspicious or mean online, talk to your parents or another adult you trust. Be skeptical. It might be normal for an adult to mentor a child or teen, but it’s never normal for an adult to seek a relationship as a peer or romantic partner with a child or teen. Also note that online, a person can say they’re anyone or anything. An adult can easily claim to be 15. Shut it down. In cases of cyberbullying, be a heroic bystander and report bad behavior when you see it. If you’re the victim of cyberbullying, shut down your device, walk away and talk face to face with someone who cares about you. Jen Wittes is a freelance writer and mother of two who lives in St. Paul. Learn more about her work at jenwittes.com. Send questions or comments to jwittes@mnparent.com.
Find it at healthychildren.org. mnparent.com • December 2016
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A
re you looking for some children’s music that won’t drive you crazy?
Check out the latest albums from an array of children’s artists who all offer — in their own ways — silliness to attract and engage kids, but also enough wry humor and up-tempo beats to charm their parents. Puns, jokes-so-bad-they’re-good, energetic rhythms and even inspiring messages of hope and kindness can all be found here. But don’t take our word for it. You can stream most of this music for free before purchasing anything. Enjoy!
KOO KOO KANGA ROO
Known for her sparkly, catchy-yetheartfelt, acoustic pop songs, England is back with her fifth album — Explorer of the World — to inspire children and adults to be curious and pay attention.
This Minneapolis-based “comedy/band/ interactive dance duo” — yes, they do their own GoNoodle videos — is out with yet another album. The Triangle of Success: A Motivational, Inspirational Audio Guide to Achieving Your Dreams delivers fun and quirky songs that include rhythmic spelling lessons (B-E-L-I-E-V-E), growth-mindset discussions (Working Hard) as well as inspirational thoughts and advice, including how to pick yourself up after a bad day (Pancakes for Dinner).
Her songs encourage kids especially to keep their heads up and hearts awake so they don’t miss the magic in the everyday experiences of their lives. She’s also created a gorgeous, 42-page art and observation activity e-book to accompany the album with beautifully illustrated lyrics, quotes, thoughtprovoking questions, photos of iconic travel destinations and exploratory missions for families. $5.99 (e-book) $9.99 (album) francesengland.com
If you enjoy the wry sense of humor of Parks and Rec, the musical stylings of They Might Be Giants and the electronic sounds of synthesizers, you’ll feel right at home with these bright, goofy guys, who offer name-your-price music sales on their website. kookookangaroo.com
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SPIN
FRANCES ENGLAND
SMILES AHEAD This compilation CD — Cool Music for Cool Families — comes from Mighty Mo Productions, a Kansas City-based independent record label that features independent “kindie” artists who create music families can enjoy together. Smiles Ahead features songs by Brady Rymer and The Little Band That Could, The Okee Dokee Brothers, Katydid, Frances England, Secret Agent 23 Skidoo, The Verve Pipe, Rissi Palmer, Kira Willey, Johnny Bregar, Casper Babypants, Mista Cookie Jar and The Chocolate Chips, and Grenadilla.
THIS
$9.99 • mightymoproductions.com
By Megan Devine
ANDREW & POLLY These award-winning music makers — and hosts of Ear Snacks, “a radical podcast for kids and families” — recently released: Ear Snacks: Songs From the Podcast. This album includes the song Grapes, which was SIRIUS XM’s No. 1 kids song of 2015, plus many other goofy, catchy songs and conversations. If you buy a physical CD, it comes with a 20-page Snacktivity booklet. If you buy a digital download, you’ll get a PDF of the booklet. $12 • andrewandpolly.com
THE OKEE DOKEE BROTHERS New to the Okee Dokees? Check out the Grammy Award-winning duo’s new-this-year picture book and compilation CD — Can You Canoe? & Other Adventure Songs. The CD includes 12 hit songs taken from Justin and Joe’s three concept albums — Can You Canoe?, Through the Woods and Saddle Up. And the large-format picture book is filled with vivid illustrations and inspiring lyrics about enjoying the outdoors. $17.95 • okeedokee.org
Megan Devine is an elementary school teacher who lives with her husband and four children in Northeastern Minnesota. Follow her on Instagram @megtdevine. Write her at mdevine@ mnparent.com. mnparent.com • December 2016
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TWO NEW PLAY SPACES! This winter you don’t have to stay cooped up with the kids, thanks to two new Twin Cities venues.
InnerActive Playground in Minnetonka
The Wishing Tree Play Cafe in White Bear Township
By Tina Mortimer
I
magine sitting at a cozy corner table, sipping on a latte and eating fresh crepes and fruit. You’re happy. You’re relaxed. You’ve got free high-speed Internet. Now imagine your kids are there with you. Hold up. The fantasy isn’t ruined! You’re still in your happy place. That’s because your kids are occupied. They’re using their imaginations (gasp!), playing dress-up, constructing castles out of giant building blocks and swimming in a pool of foam rings, all within your sight. Maybe they’re eating crepes, too, but they can’t knock over your latte because they’re at their own kiddie table with their friends. Is it possible for parents and kids to coexist in such perfect harmony? Husband and wife team Jennie and Bryan Enloe of White Bear Lake hope so. They recently opened The Wishing Tree Play Cafe in White Bear Township, about 12 miles north of St. Paul, near I-35E and Highway 96.
mnparent.com • December 2016
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PLAY SPACES!
Photo courtesy of Davin Brandt and C7 Studios
A NEW PLAY CAFE
The Wishing Tree Play Cafe ⊲⊲1011 Meadowlands Drive, White Bear Township ⊲⊲9 a.m.–7:30 p.m. Monday–Friday, 8:30 a.m.–1 p.m. Saturdays–Sundays ⊲⊲Daily admission for children ages 9 months and up is $5–7 and $3.50–$5 for additional siblings (includes in-andout privileges). ⊲⊲thewishingtreeplaycafe.com
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Their 4,500-square-foot indoor playground and restaurant — designed for ages 6 and younger and their caregivers — includes areas for infants and toddlers, as well as a play area for older kids. Enrichment classes include yoga, music and sign language. Six-week programs for kids include a Prehistoric Pals Dino Club Dino Diggers and Princess Preparatory. Workshops for adults include options such as Teach Your Children to Listen the FIRST Time, The Ins and Outs of Toilet Training and more from Behave Your Best. They’ve also struck up partnerships with two other local businesses — Pretty Princess Parties and the Teddy Bear Band — to enhance their birthday-party offerings. The Wishing Tree gets its name from the weeping willow tree that Jennie Enloe made wishes on as a child. Enloe, who herself is a mother to five boys, said she takes pride in the fact that The Wishing Tree is an environmentally friendly place, with a focus on green toys and equipment, organic food and non-toxic cleaning methods. “We created this place out of necessity,” Enloe said. “Being a mother and understanding that families are looking for something more, I wanted to design an environment where parents and kids could bond, enjoy healthy food and have fun.” The Enloes aren’t new to the culinary arts either. They also operate The Pizza Shoppe at the Minnesota State Fair and Leimon’s Pizzeria, which travels to other fairs and special events around the U.S.
A NEW INDOOR PARK The opening of the White Bear Township play cafe, comes not long after the 2016 closure of the Play & Learn Cafe at 10982 Cedar Lake Road in Minnetonka. Founded by a Golden Valley mother of two after a $15,000 Kickstarter campaign, it was the first facility of its kind and opened to much parent fanfare in March 2015 due to its play spaces, tasty coffee and family-friendly food. Minnetonka, however, didn’t have to wait too long for another indoor play space to open just four miles away. Enter InnerActive Playground — an 18,000-square-foot indoor attraction for all ages near the I-494 and I-394 interchange. Ted and Stacy Anderson of Golden Valley (parents to two boys, ages 4 and 6) recently opened the super-size indoor park. It includes a large playground area for older children, a separate toddler area for ages 5 and younger, a giant jumping pillow, a full-size basketball court, a full-size turf field and large building blocks from Imagination Playground (pictured above). There’s a cafeteria with vending machines and private party room (which costs $50 for two hours with an eight-kid minimum). Outside food is welcome. The Andersons are able to keep the facility open 365 days a year — similar to an outdoor playground — because of its self-service nature. “That means that we will not have staff on site at all times,” Stacy Anderson said. “Our guests purchase their play passes or memberships online, and then receive a five-digit code to enter the park.” Parents like the facility because they can sit in the cafeteria and see all the play areas for all ages, Stacy Anderson said. A 2-year-old can be playing with building blocks while a 4-year-old can be on the bouncer while the 7-year-old is shooting hoops. And the tots area? It’s given new life to the play equipment from the former Play and Learn Cafe, Ted Anderson said.
InnerActive Playground ⊲⊲131 Cheshire Lane, Suite 100 Minnetonka ⊲⊲7 a.m.– 9:30 p.m. daily (365 days a year) ⊲⊲Daily admission is $9 for ages 1 to 17 (infants and adults can visit for free). Memberships range from $21 to $48 per month and $168 to $362 per year. ⊲⊲inneractiveplayground.com
mnparent.com • December 2016
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PLAY SPACES!
INDOOR PLAY SPACES IN THE TWIN CITIES
Check out these places of all types and sizes when it’s time for the kids to burn off a little energy (and you can’t — or don’t want to — go outside)! Adventure Peak in Edinborough Park, Edina, edinboroughpark.com
Playworks, Prior Lake, playworksfun.com
AirMaxx, Eden Prairie, airmaxxtrampolinepark.com
Plymouth Fieldhouse, plymouthmn.gov
Big Thrill Factory, Minnetonka, bigthrillfactory.com
Pump It Up, Twin Cities, pumpitupparty.com
Brown Family Adventure Park, Ham Lake, adventureparkmn.com
Sky Zone, Plymouth and Oakdale, skyzone.com
Eagle’s Nest, New Brighton, tinyurl.com/nbeaglesnest
The Blast, Eagan, tinyurl.com/blastplayground
Good Times Park, Eagan, goodtimespark.com
The Giggle Factory, Hudson, Wis., thegigglefactorykids.com
InnerActive, Minnetonka, inneractiveplayground.com
Tropical Adventure, Shoreview, shoreviewcommunitycenter.com
Jump City, Otsego, jumpcitymn.com
Turf Tots and Pavilion Play Place, Hopkins, hopkinsmn.com
Kids Oasis, Stillwater, stillwaterkidsoasis.com
Vertical Endeavors, Minneapolis, St. Paul and Duluth, verticalendeavors.com
Lookout Ridge, Woodbury, woodburylookoutridge.com Maple Maze, Maple Grove, tinyurl.com/maplemaze Monkey House, White Bear Lake, monkeyhousemn.com Pinwheel Play, Chanhassen, pinwheelplay.com
Wishing Tree Play Cafe, White Bear Township, thewishingtreeplaycafe.com Williston Treehouse, Minnetonka, tinyurl.com/willistontreehouse
Tina Mortimer lives in White Bear Lake with her husband and two children. Follow her work at tinamortimer.contently.com. Minnesota Parent editor Sarah Jackson contributed to this article.
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
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Unplug! Turn off the TV/tablet/ phone/LeapFrog and play face to face with these awesome, familyfriendly games.
Rock Me Archimedes
By Amy Sutton and Sarah Jackson
Objective: Move your marbles from the center of the teetering platform to your end without letting either end touch the ground or tabletop.
Spot It! Hip Objective: Race to spot picture matches on cards featuring kitschy objects, hipster expressions, guilty pleasures and popcultural icons.
Ages: 8 and up Cost: $34.99 Why you’ll love it: This game helps kids develop strategizing and estimation skills. But it also incorporates the often-neglected idea that sometimes one must retreat in order to ultimately move forward. And the finished real-wood and polished marbles of the game are pleasing enough to the eye that you won’t mind leaving the game out on a table.
Ages: 13 and up, but come on, any kid who won’t eat the cards can at least try to play any version of this game. Cost: $12.99 Why you’ll love it: Though there’s only one matching object between any two cards, the objects’ varying sizes make it surprisingly hard to spot them. Plus, like all versions of this game, these circular cards come in a cute tin, not a flimsy box.
Where to buy it: Marbles the Brain Store
Where to buy it: Amazon.com
Pengoloo Objective: Collect the penguin’s eggs by remembering their colors when your turn rolls around. Ages: 4 and up Cost: $29.99
Why you’ll love it: This imaginative twist on the classic Memory game helps little ones develop recall skills. Additional rules for older players allow for more complex play. And you can feel ecofriendly about this one because
the manufacturer has vowed to plant two trees for every tree used to create the game’s ultracute wooden pieces. Where to buy it: Marbles the Brain Store mnparent.com • December 2016
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analyzing probability, short- and long-term planning strategies and logic.
3. Language Skills
Board game benefits By Jan Pierce
My parents taught my brother and me to play Monopoly and then spent the next five years finding excuses not to play the game. After all, it takes a lot of time and patience to play board games with children. They forget the rules, they may cry when they lose and sometimes they try to cheat. But there are good reasons for introducing board games to children when they’re young — and for continuing to play increasingly more complex games as they’re ready for them:
1. Basic Civility and Manners During the life of a board game, there are a number of skills tested and honed. Players need to help set up the game and learn the rules. They must agree to abide by the rules and stick with the game until the end. They have to wait their turn and interact with other players in a positive manner. And, most challenging of all, they need to be able to lose the game (without negative behaviors) or win (graciously). That’s actually a lot to expect from children. Parents and older siblings can model good game-playing behaviors. One way to soften the experience for younger children is to play in teams that are age-appropriate or provide support for the younger members.
2. Math Skills The simplest math board games will involve matching of pictures and numbers. They’ll teach the skill of counting spaces while moving a board piece. Then they’ll move on to number recognition, shape and color recognition and sequencing. Later math board games will require operations skills — addition, subtraction, detecting patterns,
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Many word games begin with simple skills such as matching, sequencing and building simple words. Letter- and word-recognition skills grow as children play. They must read directions to play games and be able to refer to written rules along the way. Word-building games such as Scrabble reinforce knowledge of the structure of words, spelling skills and manipulation of patterns found in words such as rhymes, prefixes and suffixes and root words.
4. Decision Making A side-effect of enjoying board games is a gradual awareness of the consequences of our decisions and choices. In games, much is accounted for by sheer luck, but as difficulty levels increase, the player increasingly needs to make good decisions at the appropriate times. A mistake can mean a loss. Cause-and-effect thinking comes into play; probabilities must be considered. The player must balance risk versus reward. Tough decisions must be made in real life — games are a safe place to practice making them.
5. Quality Time In our fast-paced lives, we have to be intentional about making room for family time. While movies and other online games clamor for our free time, there’s something to be said for quieter, unplugged family time. Board games offer a space of time in which to laugh and chatter with one another and simply enjoy being together. Jan Pierce is a freelance writer and author of Homegrown Readers: Simple Ways to Help Your Child Learn to Read. Learn more at janpierce.net.
Unplug!
Bugaloop Qwirkle Objective: The first player to get three Sock Puppet Charades Objective: Act out what’s on your card using sock puppets and a collection of provided props. Ages: 8 and up Cost: $24.99 Why you’ll love it: What could be more whimsical than a game of charades with the kids? Charades with sock puppets! And these sock puppets are adorkable.
plastic bug pieces to the finish — without getting pushed off course by a wandering HexBug — wins. Ages: 6 and up Cost: $30 Why you’ll love it: This sequel to the Bugs in the Kitchen board game sends the Hexbug through two clear pipes — and underground beneath the game board — creating a suspenseful scene for players who must move their little plastic bugs forward by rolling a die. Where to buy it: ABC Toy Zone
Where to buy it: Marbles the Brain Store
Slapzi Objective: Match your picture cards to the right clue cards as fast as you can. Ages: 8 and up Cost: $20 Why you’ll love it: This pictorial game merges the urgency of the card game Speed, the tricky matching of Spot It! and even the judgement calls of Apples to Apples. And it has staying power, thanks to 65 clue cards, 120 double-sided picture cards and numerous ways to vary play. Also, it’s from the makers of the must-have dice game, Tenzi. Where to buy it: Kiddywampus
Objective: Earn points by building rows and columns of tiles that share a common color or shape without allowing duplicates. The player with the most points wins. Ages: 6 and up, but we think preschoolers could get an early start on this game, too. Cost: $29.95 Why you’ll love it: This game mixes the matching fun of Dominoes with the excitement, scoring and strategy of Scrabble with 108 colorful, kid-friendly, wooden tiles. Where to buy it: MindWare.com
Suspend
Ticket to Ride
Objective: Hang all your pieces, suspended only by other pieces, without causing the whole structure to fall down.
Objective: Create railways between destinations according to your drawn cards.
Ages: Ages 4 and up for Suspend Jr. and ages 8 and up for Suspend (pictured) Cost: $16.99–$19.99
Ages: 8 and up Cost: $34.99–$49.99
Why you’ll love it: Similar to games like Jenga, the goal of not being the one to cause the structure to fall down adds excitement and dramatic tension. With each turn, the structure changes.
Why you’ll love it: A board game doesn’t win Game of the Year awards in eight countries unless it’s really something special. Players race to connect train routes throughout the U.S. and Canada before other players capitalize on the same limited track.
Where to buy it: Games by James
Where to buy it: Games by James mnparent.com • December 2016
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Holiday ut
Out & Abo DECEMBER
mnparent.com/calendar
Holiday Train ⊲⊲See a Canadian Pacific train decorated for the holidays, making 21 stops in Minnesota to raise money, donations and awareness for local food banks. Festivities, which last about 30 minutes, include a brief presentation from local food bank officials and a short concert, featuring holiday tunes and hits from Kelly Prescott and Colin James. When: Dec. 9 arrival times include 5:45 p.m. in Cottage Grove and 7:15 p.m. in St. Paul. Dec. 10 arrival times are 2:20 p.m. in New Hope, 3:35 p.m. in Golden Valley, 4:35 p.m. in St. Louis Park and 7 p.m. in Northeast Minneapolis. Where: See cpr.ca for exact locations. Cost: FREE; donations are encouraged. Info: cpr.ca
ONGOING
Kids in the Castle
Santa & Albert Rock Christmas
⊲⊲Visit the historic Turnblad Mansion for a variety of holiday events, displays and children’s activities, including a free holiday open house on Dec. 14.
⊲⊲Santa and his elf friend celebrate the holidays with 20-minute theatrical performances for families. Guests are encouraged to participate in a sing-along of holiday carols at the end and to take their own pictures with Santa. Kids can also visit a corral of live reindeer and take part in craft activities. When: Saturdays and Sundays through Dec. 18 Where: Bachman’s on Lyndale, Minneapolis Cost: FREE Info: bachmans.com
When: Nov. 25–Dec. 23 Where: American Swedish Institute, Minneapolis Cost: Various. Museum admission is $5–$9 for ages 6 and up. Info: asimn.org
Holidazzle ⊲⊲Join in the city of Minneapolis’ annual holiday celebration with food and drink, movie nights, carriage rides, shopping, fireworks and visits from Santa. When: Thursdays–Sundays
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Nov. 25–Dec. 23 Where: Loring Park, Minneapolis Cost: FREE Info: holidazzle.com
Macy’s SantaLand ⊲⊲Walk through an animated story of Santa’s elves preparing for Christmas at the North Pole. Meet Santa for a chat and a photo, and visit Mrs. Claus’ bakery, too. When: Through Dec. 24 Where: Macy’s, Minneapolis Cost: Free. Fees apply for photos and special events. Info: See macys.com/believe and macysrestaurants.com/santa.
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer ⊲⊲Rudolph and friends are back for an encore production of this all-ages musical. When: Through Dec. 28 Where: Stages Theatre Company, Hopkins Cost: $18–$25 Info: stagestheatre.org
Holiday Saturdays ⊲⊲Make your own holiday cards, enjoy community concerts and shop for unique Minnesota gifts at the Minnesota History Center’s museum store at this new event, which also features a StoryWalk based on the book North Woods Girl. When: Saturdays Nov. 26–Dec. 31 with art activities from noon to 3 p.m. and concerts at 1 and 3 p.m. Where: Minnesota History Center, St. Paul Cost: Free with museum admission
($10–$12 for adults, $6 for ages 5–17 and free for ages 4 and younger) Info: mnhs.org
Holiday Lights in the Park ⊲⊲View more than 60 holiday light sculptures and animated displays as you drive through Phalen Park to benefit the St. Paul Police Foundation. When: 5–10 p.m. daily through Jan. 1 Where: 1615 Phalen Drive E., St. Paul Cost: $10 per car at the gate ($8 online) Info: lightsinthepark.org
Gingerbread Wonderland ⊲⊲This second-annual exhibit features elaborately decorated gingerbread houses from community members alongside iconic Twin Cities buildings made out of gingerbread by local bakers.
Holiday
Out & About When: Nov. 22–Jan. 8 Where: Norway House, Minneapolis Cost: Free for ages 12 and younger and $5 for ages 13 and older Info: Recipes and patterns are available at norwayhouse.org.
DEC. 1–4, 8–11
European Christmas Market ⊲⊲Meander through decorated booths modeled after German Christkindlmarkts, featuring the work of local artisans. When: Dec. 1–4, 8–11 Where: Union Depot, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: stpaulchristmasmarket.com
mnparent.com • December 2016
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Out & About Photo by Dan Norman
Cinderella ⊲⊲Back by popular demand, this rambunctious musical — created by Minneapolis’ own Children’s Theatre Company — tells the iconic story of Cinderella’s transformation, including holiday carols, updated pop-culture references, physical comedy, audience participation and silly gags, plus grand sets and lavish costuming. When: Through Jan. 8 Cost: Tickets start at $15.
Where: Children’s Theatre Company, Minneapolis Info: childrenstheatre.org
DEC. 2–18
The Littlest Angel ⊲⊲Based on Charles Tazewell’s beloved book, this all-ages musical adaptation follows the adventures and misadventures of a little angel who creates one disaster after another after he gets to heaven. When: Dec. 2–18 Where: Youth Performance Company, Minneapolis Cost: Tickets start at $5. Info: youthperformanceco.org
DEC. 3
Discovery Days at The Bakken ⊲⊲Join in an exploration of science, technology, engineering, art and math topics with hands-on activities and
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December 2016 • mnparent.com
demonstrations, including demos of a TI LaunchPad Board used by real engineers, an Arduino electronics workshop and coding activities with CoderDojoTC (a local coding club), all with an event theme of Cracking the Code. When: 10:30 a.m.–3:30 p.m. Dec. 3 Where: The Bakken Museum, Minneapolis Cost: Free with admission, which is $10 for ages 25 to 61 and $8 for all other ages, except for ages 4 and younger, who can visit for free Info: thebakken.org
DEC. 6
Ballet Tuesdays ⊲⊲Take in a ballet performance on the second Tuesday of each month, courtesy of Saint Paul Ballet students and company members, offering excerpts
from productions such as The Nutcracker and the company’s diverse repertoire. Children are invited to wear their dance shoes and tutus and to practice techniques demonstrated by the dancers. Bring a lunch to eat during the show or stop by Anita’s Cafe at Landmark Center. When: 1 p.m. Dec. 6, Jan. 10, Feb. 7, March 14, April 11 and May 9. The ballet will also perform at the Mall of America at 10 and 11 a.m. on Feb. 7 and April 25. Where: Landmark Center, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: spballet.org or landmarkcenter.org
DEC. 9
Every Woman Can ⊲⊲Celebrate women working together to empower, inspire and support each other to inspire positive changes in themselves
Be Someone’s Sunshine When Their Skies Are Gray
and their communities. Special guests will include Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein, the makers of The Business of Being Born film, and a performance by the folkrock duo, the Indigo Girls. A portion of the proceeds from the event (sponsored by Health Foundations Birth Center of St. Paul) will go to Esther Homes and Nurture Project International.
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Monster Jam ⊲⊲After a three-year hiatus, this monstertruck show is returning to Minneapolis — this time to dirty-up the new U.S. Bank Stadium with 7,500 tons of dirt. When: Dec. 10–11 Where: U.S. Bank Stadium, Minneapolis Cost: Tickets start at $15. Info: monsterjam.com Poser Design MNP 1216 H6.indd 1
11/9/16 2:30 PM
DEC. 11–MAY 14
Sundays at Landmark ⊲⊲This annual fall-to-spring series of mostly free cultural and arts events is designed to entertain, enrich and educate all ages. When: Events start at 1 p.m. and are free, except where noted: Dec. 11 (Santa’s Workshop); 1 and 3:30 p.m. Jan. 8 (Minnesota Boychoir); 3 p.m. Jan. 29 (Saint Paul Civic Symphony); Feb. 19 (Carpathian Celebration, $4–$6); 11 a.m. March 19 (Day of Dance, $6); 11 a.m. April 1 (Scottish Ramble, $6); 3 p.m. May 7 (Rose Ensemble); and May 14 (Saint Paul Civic Symphony Mother’s Day Concert). Where: Landmark Center, St. Paul Cost: Various Info: landmarkcenter.org
17 or 20 now f our Dec. 6 ll o r n E tory H Info hool S Presc dergarten, 10, & 12 Kin s: Jan. 5 ing e M et
Is your child’s growth on target? How about his learning growth? In Minnetonka schools, the average student grows more than one grade level each year. By 5th grade, most students are reading at the 11th grade level compared to national norms.1 We believe . . . there is no limit to what children can learn!
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FROM OUR READERS
The 5 stages of Santa Thank you to all our readers for sending in so many photos of their kids with Old St. Nick! And congrats to the winner of four passes to the children’s museum — Jessica Pasek, whose daughter, Macy, is pictured here.
THE SLEEP-THRU
UNHAPPY RETURNS
Macy, 5 months and 17 months, of Richfield
SPLIT DECISION Will, 5 days old, of Mound
Cort and Kendall, ages 1½ and 3, of Woodbury
BEST DAY EVER
Adelia and Callan, ages 3 and 2, of Minneapolis
GROUP EFFORT
Kennedy, 3, of Minneapolis
Parker, 4, Drew, 6 months, Cooper 6, of Chaska
Andrew, 5, Alison, 7, Abby, 9, of Robbinsdale
Want to see your kid on this page? Send photos with your child’s first/last name, age and city to editor@mnparent.com.
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December 2016 • mnparent.com