Better Late Than Never

Passion never ceases to amaze me. Once it finds you, so many incredible things and feelings begin to unravel, producing an abundance of purpose and desire to the day. You feel things like never before; so deep and almost uncontrollable, passion can flood a heart and completely take over one’s very soul.

In the beginning we seek out each and every opportunity to bring us closer to this passion. In giving so very much of yourself to it, it can turn into a borderline obsession. It makes it easy to know what your time will be given to and allows for massive personal growth. This type of pull can be a healthy thing as long as it brings out the best in you. If it challenges you to believe in yourself more than you have ever believed, then I can’t believe it could be bad.

I have to say how entirely blessed I was in the beginning of my river hunting. My babes were tiny, my mother was in good health and could help me out with them, and we all were able to pursue what it is we love quite naturally. Leaving in the middle of the night to reach my tiny coastal waters, I could be home a little after lunch. With or without a harvest, I still felt as if I were the richest woman in the world. I watched many a sunrise in total solitude and was able to be the first person to touch the water at daybreak.

That devotion made a passionate woman out of me. I would share my fish tale of the day with my family, and that passion would flow right out of my heart and into theirs. Honestly, it was easy even though it was hard. Passion led the way and I learned to fish the river by leaps and bounds compared to some.

AS WE KNOW, life has this way of reminding us that on the flip side of passion are things we must face head on. For me, I went from fishing those daybreak bites, to not. My babes needed me as I embraced being a single mother and school kept me hunkered down more than I had hunkered down in some time. It wasn’t even a debate, despite the importance of fishing in my life. Steelheading allowed me to check out of my mind and check into nature. Hauling quite the load mentally at the time, I truly wanted nothing more than to work some water and find some fish.

One thing is for sure: My windows of opportunity had shrunk. But instead of feeling sorry for myself, I readied my gear as my babes slept. When I did find the time I would be ready. Even though I hadn’t given the afternoon bite much of a chance in my winter fishing, I knew it was time to give it a whirl if I wanted to catch a steelhead.

It was honestly weird to show up with only a couple fishers still on the river. “Oh, you missed it!” the guys said with a laugh, or “You are late!” The greetings didn’t shock me, but had they known the mental load I was carrying that winter they might not have been so quick to give me a hard time. Given the pressure the water and fish had no doubt endured from my fellow fishermen before my arrival, the anticipation of it all was different for me than waiting on sunrise so I could take the day’s first cast. However, this chapter wasn’t about tugs, even though there were plenty of them. It was about me finding a way to hold onto the only thing I felt I could even control: my love for steelhead.

THE GROWTH THAT took place in this chapter of my life was significant. I had little confidence in showing up on the water at that time of day and as I know, confidence is crucial. However, I didn’t have the pressure of fishermen either, so doing things I was not certain of seemed less scary. I may have been late but I was there and the weights in my heart began to feel easier to carry. Learning to let go of things had always been a struggle for me, but it was within this timeframe that I realized I wasn’t ever going to let them go because these things were also very much a part of me. Yes, they hurt me while they were still turbulent in my heart, but those afternoons on the river helped me find the places within my heart where my troubles belonged. It helped settle things in a manner so that they wouldn’t just keep that turbulence roaring.

The amazing thing was that the fish did indeed bite after noon. I landed the biggest coastal buck of my life one fine evening on the river. I found him where very few men even fish. I was forced to fish spots that weren’t my number one choice, knowing they had less pressure on them at daylight. Learning new water and methods challenged me and ultimately rewarded me. Having the sun on the water was a blessing, as the fish were quite active simply because of that warmth, I think. Moving up into holes, I found fish that would typically be waiting for you at daybreak.

I actually liked it – a lot! I landed many a fish without a soul in sight, and somehow the Lord also blessed me with a couple of true friends who showed up with perfect timing when I needed them most. Had Larry and Zach not been there for me, both in the heaviness of my life and the camaraderie of steelhead, that winter wouldn’t have been what it was. Despite

TIME

Docking and maneuvering your boat in high winds has never been so easy. Let the Joy Stick do it for you.

GPS position hold and heading hold is included.

8 and 99 Kicker Motors in stock. Call such massive change in my life, I began to believe I was going to be OK.

HAD I NOT felt such passion for the river, it could have been easy to tell myself I didn’t have the time to fish. The thing I love about life is that as long as you are truly willing to put in the work – to give it your all in the time that you can give – you shall not fail. In the chapters of life in which we feel lost, so lost that we could possibly even let our passion slip through our fingers, may we always remember it is better to be late than never.

If we are lucky enough to ever find true passion, may we realize the importance of feeding it. Living in yesterday just isn’t enough. Even if you find yourself full of doubt, live for today. Gather your gear, remember who you are, and get your ass to the river. The river won’t judge you, nor will she think you are late. She knows you have arrived at precisely the right time, just like the wild beauty that has settled into your spot. My heart is on the river and I couldn’t change it, even if I tried. NS