Building Bridges

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Building Bridges

—Baruti Kafele Author, Educational Consultant, and Retired Principal

“Building Bridges is an insightful guide packed with information for educators, especially those who work with students at risk. Author Don Parker cites evidence-based research and offers practical strategies to help educators build and maintain strong teacher-student relationships.”

Readers will: • Understand how to effectively reach students at risk • Read and learn from the author’s firsthand experience leading and teaching students at risk • Discover how school culture and climate affect student behavior • Use chapter-ending questions to reflect on the book’s content • Create a plan to help students at risk, using each chapter’s action steps Visit go.SolutionTree.com/behavior to download the free reproducibles in this book. ISBN 978-1-947604-35-3 90000

SolutionTree.com

9 781947 604353

Don Parker

—Rose M. Thomas Former Administrative Dean of Students, Bremen High School District 228, Midlothian, Illinois

B

uilding Bridges: Engaging Students at Risk Through the Power of Relationships features evidence-based strategies to create positive relationships with students at risk to help them succeed in school and life. Based on his own experience teaching and leading students at risk, author Don Parker explains how zero-tolerance policies are not effective and, instead, how building trusting teacherstudent relationships improve students’ behavior and lead to academic achievement. Parker provides the guidance necessary for K–12 teachers and leaders to create a school culture that promotes student success.

Engaging Students at Risk Through the Power of Relationships

“In Building Bridges, author Don Parker delivers a powerful book on how to build meaningful relationships with students at risk of failing in school. As a seasoned and effective urban school teacher and principal, Parker understands firsthand why relationships, compassion, and empathy for students matter and are prerequisites to academic success. This book is a must-read for anyone working with students who are at risk but have the potential for greatness.”


Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press Materials appearing here are copyrighted. With one exception, all rights are reserved. Readers may reproduce only those pages marked “Reproducible.” Otherwise, no part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means (electronic, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without prior written permission of the publisher. 555 North Morton Street Bloomington, IN 47404 800.733.6786 (toll free) / 812.336.7700 FAX: 812.336.7790 email: info@SolutionTree.com SolutionTree.com Visit go.SolutionTree.com/behavior to download the free reproducibles in this book. Printed in the United States of America

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Parker, Don, 1975- author. Title: Building bridges : engaging students at risk through the power of relationships / Don Parker. Description: Bloomington, IN : Solution Tree Press, [2019] | Includes bibliographical references and index. Identifiers: LCCN 2018048545 | ISBN 9781947604353 (perfect bound) Subjects: LCSH: Students with social disabilities--United States. | Students with disabilities--United States. | Affective education--United States. | Social skills in children--Study and teaching. | Teacher-student relationships--United States. | Classroom management--United States. Classification: LCC LC4091 .P356 2019 | DDC 371.826/94--dc23 LC record available at https://lccn. loc.gov/2018048545 Solution Tree Jeffrey C. Jones, CEO Edmund M. Ackerman, President Solution Tree Press President and Publisher: Douglas M. Rife Associate Publisher: Sarah Payne-Mills Art Director: Rian Anderson Managing Production Editor: Kendra Slayton Senior Production Editor: Christine Hood Senior Editor: Amy Rubenstein Copy Editor: Kendra Slayton Proofreader: Elisabeth Abrams Text and Cover Designer: Abigail Bowen Editorial Assistant: Sarah Ludwig


Table of Contents Reproducible pages are in italics.

About the Author. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . xi Foreword by Robert Jackson. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . xiii Introduction. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1 School Discipline. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1 Zero Tolerance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4 Counseling and Relationship Building. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 About the Book. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5

Chapter 1 Develop the Mindset. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Developing a Relationship-Building Mindset. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

Chapter 2 Show That You Care. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Student Questionnaire . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31

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Chapter 3 Establish a Culture for Learning. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38 School Culture and Climate. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39

Chapter 4 Don’t Take Bad Behavior Personally . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47 Finding Solutions to Frustrating Problems in the Classroom . . . 48

Chapter 5 Create an Effective Classroom Management Plan . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58 Classroom Management Plan. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59

Chapter 6 Connect Through Content. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67 Culturally Responsive Teaching Practices Survey. . . . . . . . . . . . 68


Table of Contents

Chapter 7 Use the Back Door. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78 Behavior and Academic Interventions for Students at Risk. . . . . 79

Chapter 8 Take an Ecological Approach. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 81 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 86 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 87 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 88 Ecological Approach to Providing Interventions for Students at Risk. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89

Chapter 9 Develop Empathy. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 95 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 96 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 97 Empathy Survey . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 98

Chapter 10 Teach Life Skills and Give Students Hope. . . . . . . . 101 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 102 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 106 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107 Goal Worksheet. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 109

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Chapter 11 Build Students’ Self-Esteem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 111 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 111 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 113 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 116 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 117 Supporting Students at Risk Through School Policies and Procedures . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 118

Chapter 12 Get to the Root of the Problem. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 119 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 121 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 125 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 126 Conflict Resolution Form . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 128

Chapter 13 Communicate With Your Heart . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 129 What the Research Says About Empathetic Listening . . . . . . . 131 What Empathetic Listening Looks Like in the Real World. . . . 132 What the Research Says About Active Listening. . . . . . . . . . . . 133 What Active Listening Looks Like in the Real World . . . . . . . . 134 What the Research Says About Reflective Listening. . . . . . . . . 136 What Reflective Listening Looks Like in the Real World . . . . . 137 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 138 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 138 Effective Listening Skills Checklist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 140

Chapter 14 Open Up. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 141 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 142 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 144 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 146 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 147 Understanding Self-Disclosure and When It Is Appropriate . . . 148


Table of Contents

Chapter 15 Seal the Bond and Provide Effective Feedback . . . 149 What the Research Says. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 150 What It Looks Like in the Real World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 152 Questions for Reflection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 154 Action Steps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 154 Methods for Providing Feedback. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 155

Epilogue. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 157 References and Resources. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 163 Index. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 177

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About the Author

D

on Parker, EdD, is the principal of Posen Intermediate School in Posen-Robbins School District 143.5 in Posen, Illinois. Previously, he was the principal of Lincoln Avenue School, a K–8 school in Dolton, Illinois, where he improved the culture, implemented a resilience program, managed the implementation of restorative justice, and increased attendance and student achievement. Dr. Parker has been an educator since 1997 with a background as a teacher, dean of students, assistant principal of student life, assistant principal for curriculum and instruction, and assistant principal for activities and athletics. His experience in education includes working in the inner-city Chicago Public Schools district and predominantly low-income, minority suburban schools. Dr. Parker was also an adjunct professor and taught graduate courses to a cohort of students seeking their master’s degrees in curriculum and instruction at National Louis University in Bolingbrook, Illinois. His diverse background in education has provided him with the knowledge of how to best apply evidence-based methods and student interventions to improve student behavior and increase student achievement. Dr. Parker has a strong belief in creating a school climate in which the entire staff goes above and beyond to meet the academic and social-emotional needs of all students. He has presented throughout the United States at the top education conferences, including the Every Student Succeeds Act Conference, Staff Development for Educators, and the National Principals Conference. Dr. Parker is a professional development provider and conducts workshops titled “The Power of Building Trusting Relationships With Students at Risk” and “Implementing a Resilience Program for Students at Risk.” Dr. Parker received a bachelor’s degree in physical education and health from Wartburg College in Waverly, Iowa; a master’s degree in educational administration xi


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from Governors State University in University Park, Illinois; and a doctorate in educational leadership from Argosy University in Chicago, Illinois. To learn more about Dr. Parker’s work, go to www.bestpathwaytosuccess.com or follow @BestPathway on Twitter. To book Don Parker for professional development, contact pd@SolutionTree.com.


Foreword By Robert Jackson

I

have been involved in education in some capacity since 1995. I have authored five books for educators, parents, and students, and I speak across the United States at educational conferences and schools. I understand the importance of building positive relationships with students and how these are key to educators’ success with their students in the classroom. Many educators are lacking in this area, causing our students, especially those coming from tough circumstances, to continue to fail miserably. Don Parker knows something about building strong, healthy relationships with students. He has successfully done so as a teacher, school administrator, and principal in Chicago and its surrounding suburbs since 1997. His research and experience have led him to write this book. Statistics are stacked against troubled students, especially students of color, who researchers predict will be incarcerated at alarming numbers. In 2011–2012, about 3.2 million public school students received out-of-school suspensions (National Center for Education Statistics, 2017a). Suspensions and trouble at school can lead to students’ first contact with the criminal justice system. Schools are actually pushing students into the juvenile justice system by having them arrested at school. Research finds that students who have been suspended are more likely to be held back a grade and drop out of school entirely (Nelson & Lind, 2015). Of students who drop out, 60 percent will be incarcerated at some point. If educators simply take a highly organized approach to keeping students in school, it will make a difference in future crime statistics (Lynch, 2015). Dr. Parker and I are disturbed by these statistics and work tirelessly to create more of a positive destiny for students at risk. Every student is one caring adult away from being a success story. Each chapter of his book gives strategies and solutions to educators who are working with students who come from troubling backgrounds. You can’t teach who you can’t reach. Connecting with students is key to the success of any educator, and this xiii


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book gives clear strategies of how to connect with troubled students. Students learn from their home environments and school environments. We can’t control what happens at home, but we can teach life skills to our students to help them navigate through school. Many students come in daily hurting with low self-esteem and no hope for the future. It’s our job as educators to teach students how to activate their power. In this book, Dr. Parker gives strategies for effectively managing the classroom, getting to the root of the problem with students, teaching students how to grow academically, and helping students envision hope for their future. With his background and research, Dr. Parker clearly has relevant experience in this area. Every chapter provides thought-provoking strategies that educators and administrators can use right away. Our mission as educators should never change from educating, activating, and motivating all students despite their backgrounds. Everywhere, educators are struggling in this area, which in turn causes our students to fail. I’m excited about Dr. Parker’s book because it addresses all the topics that many educators struggle with. Our children are our future and deserve our best. I’m excited that he has shared his successful strategies and solutions with others. You are going to enjoy this book!


Introduction

T

eaching is much more difficult than it used to be. This lament is common among teachers and administrators. Sometimes this sentiment is founded on mounting paperwork and professional responsibilities. Other times, it is a result of the ever-changing bureaucratic requirements of the job. But the most common reason for this complaint is student behavior. Seasoned educators have said that they wish teaching were more like it was when they first started—when students and parents alike revered teachers. Novice teachers come in expecting respectful, hardworking students to be the rule and not the exception; they foresee neither the number nor the depth of the challenges awaiting them. Whether seasoned or novice, teachers having to devote more time to discipline than instruction is a shared frustration. While some believe that zero-tolerance policies are appropriate to deal with discipline issues, I have found in my experience that holding in-depth discussions with students and building relationships with them is far more effective. Because of the inability to build relationships with students and find effective solutions to behavior problems, students are often funneled out of school into the juvenile and criminal justice systems as a result of zero-tolerance policies. The following sections discuss this shift in more detail, after which I provide an overview of the rest of the book.

School Discipline Discipline problems are prevalent in U.S. public schools and continue to be one of the greatest challenges in education (Muscott et al., 2004). According to C. Stephen Wallis (1995), “The bad behavior and loss of respect exhibited daily in America’s 1


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public schools indicate an institution in deep trouble” (p. 17). School discipline is a prevalent problem and does not discriminate among schools; school discipline is everybody’s problem (Barton, Coley, & Wenglinsky, 1998). “Many public school teachers cite student attitudes, such as apathy and disrespect for teachers, as a major problem facing schools today” (Chen, 2019). Schools in cities, in suburbs, and in rural areas serving students from all racial backgrounds experience the same struggles with student behavior. These problems are critical factors in student academic achievement and support, placing the issue of classroom order and school discipline front and center in school reform efforts to enhance student performance. School discipline problems and student misbehavior don’t only negatively affect academic achievement; they also negatively affect teachers’ attitudes (Jackson, 1998). Mike Ford (2013) states: The specific ways a disruptive student might hurt the learning ability of other students are fairly self-evident. One effect might be decreased teacher effectiveness. . . . A teacher who spends large chunks of his or her time dealing with student discipline is not spending time on instruction. Inevitably, other students in a disruptive environment will suffer.

Teachers must maintain control of the class; otherwise, they cannot teach effectively. Even teachers who generally have control of their class and possess strong classroom management skills grow frustrated after encountering numerous class disruptions and abundant disrespect. Such environments have been linked to teacher stress and attrition. Teacher burnout has become a critical concern for many interested in teacher attrition (Chan, 2006). In the United States, half of new teachers are leaving the profession within the first five years (Lambert & McCarthy, 2006). One of the major reasons for teacher attrition is job dissatisfaction, with almost 25 percent of these departures due to problems related to student misbehavior (Ingersoll, 2003). Youki Terada (2018) states: Teacher stress is high partly because the demands of the job can lead to emotional exhaustion, which arises as teachers try to manage the emotional needs of their students in addition to their academic needs. Not all students come to school ready to learn, and distracted or disruptive students can quickly drain a teacher’s emotional energy.

According to Julian Stanley (2014), 91 percent of teachers experience high levels of stress, and as many as 41 percent of teachers leave their jobs within the first five years (Ingersoll, Merrill, & Stuckey, 2014).


Introduction

3

When examining the causes for unruly student behavior that hinders academic success, several factors deserve scrutiny. A majority of the research on school discipline suggests that poverty, lack of social skills, lack of parental involvement, disintegration of family structure, television and media, and students’ home environments contribute to disruptive behavior (Atkins et al., 2002; Bear, 1998; Skiba & Peterson, 2003). These are powerful—and sometimes impossible—factors for educators to overcome. Most schools find it challenging to manage disruptive student behaviors, such as violence, antisocial conduct, bullying, talking back, and absenteeism, with any level of effectiveness (Barbadoro, 2017). Because these factors are beyond educators’ control, it is easy to point to them whenever disruption festers in classroom settings and when a negative school climate persists after failed attempts to repair it. I have been guilty of this myself. When I was a dean of students working in a Chicago suburban high school, I took it personally when students misbehaved or when the negative school climate didn’t improve. I viewed my successes and failures on the job as reflections of who I was as a person. On days when student behavior was good in the building and there were no fights, I felt proud. On days when I had to process numerous discipline referrals for disrespect and insubordination or constantly break up fights, I carried a negative attitude around with me. Unfortunately, for quite some time, I had far more bad days than good. As a result, I started doubting myself. My self-esteem faltered. I questioned whether I could do anything to improve student behavior. The tendency to be hard on oneself is a human affliction, and I certainly suffered with it. I struggled so mightily because I cared so deeply about the students and the success of the school. Meanwhile, I suffered from another human affliction—the tendency to shift blame. The frustration of disrespectful students and murmuring teachers wore on me, as it often does on educators in similar situations. In an effort to protect my image, I shared the school’s statistics when teachers or community members mentioned the school’s failing reputation. This south suburban high school in Chicago had a population of almost 1,200 students, and over 59 percent of the students were from low-income households, 20 percent had individualized education programs (IEPs), and 3 percent were homeless. The student population in this school was 94 percent African American, 3 percent Hispanic, and 1 percent white. The school’s average ACT score was 16.6, compared to the Illinois state average of 20.8 and the national average of 21 (Illinois Report Card, 2018). It became my standby to quote these facts when teachers complained


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about student misbehavior, a gang presence in the school, or the number of verbal and physical altercations that occurred regularly.

Zero Tolerance At this time, zero tolerance was very popular. Many school districts adopted zero-tolerance policies to send the message that certain student behaviors were verboten. According to Russell J. Skiba and Kimberly Knesting (2001) of the Safe and Responsive Schools Project (now called the Equity Project), zero tolerance quickly spread among educators concerned about an epidemic of youth violence, and school boards across the country adopted zero-tolerance policies for a range of disruptive behaviors. Zero-tolerance policies were dramatically expanded by state legislatures and school districts to include not just weapons and drugs, but fighting and misbehavior (Peterson, 2005), which happened to be two of the most frequently referred behaviors at my school. In accordance with zero-tolerance policies, schools took punitive measures in an attempt to get student behavior under control. According to Sandra M. Way (2003) and Jack P. Gibbs (1975), punishment can deter misbehavior either through experiencing a consequence or through knowledge about the punishments others have received. And school officials have long known that if students understand what types of behavior are prohibited and what consequences they will face for engaging in these prohibited behaviors, they will be more likely to conduct themselves appropriately (Yell, Rozalski, & Drasgow, 2001). Knowledge of the consequences can cause students to think twice about committing an infraction. Adopting this school of thought, our institution implemented strict discipline policies. Suspensions increased. But behavior infractions increased as well. I found myself suspending students at an alarming rate. The school community’s belief that tougher disciplinary consequences would serve as a deterrent proved to be misguided. School research has thoroughly documented how ineffective out-of-school suspensions are. In fact, research suggests that such suspensions actually reinforce negative behavior. Suspensions increase the risk of disruption and lead to dropout and delinquency (Skiba & Peterson, 2003). Students at risk view suspension as an attack or rejection, become more aggressive, and disengage from school and teachers (Seita & Brendtro, 2003). Suspension fuels anger and seems to add to aberrant behavior (Parker, 2006). Lacking this knowledge at the time, many educators were surprised when the punitive discipline codes proved futile. Others were caught in the matrix of attempting to follow the new standards while witnessing firsthand the dismal outcomes.


Introduction

5

In an attempt to work with teachers and enforce the discipline policy with fidelity, I suspended students left and right. I spent several years watching many students at risk constantly fail class, get suspended or expelled, commit sundry rule infractions, and drop out. My heart grew heavy, and I went home from work feeling guilty on a daily basis. To be more effective at helping students at risk behave appropriately—and thus free them and their peers to learn—I wanted to learn the best methods for doing so and become skilled in their use. As part of earning my doctorate in educational leadership, I studied research, conducted a study of my own, and wrote a dissertation on the most effective methods to use with students at risk to decrease behavior referrals.

Counseling and Relationship Building My experience and education research have revealed that the most effective methods involve authoritative counseling and building relationships with students (Baker, Grant, & Morlock, 2008; Wang & Neihart, 2015). While the teachers I’ve worked with don’t universally agree that this is the case, ample research and numerous publications indicate that building relationships with challenging students is key to improving behavior and promoting academic success (Boynton & Boynton, 2005; Juvonen, 2006; Rimm-Kaufman & Sandilos, 2018). Building relationships with students increases engagement, motivation, test scores, and grade-point averages while decreasing absenteeism, dropout rates, and discipline issues (Brown, 2010; Martin & Dowson, 2009; Roorda, Koomen, Split, & Oort, 2011). Throughout this book, I share evidence-based strategies for building trusting relationships with students at risk and discuss how these relationships help students improve their behavior and academic achievement. The heart of the book is about disassembling the walls that challenging students put up and opening the lines of communication, with each chapter sharing an essential part of the process. Imagine classrooms full of resilient students focused on their learning, where respectful behaviors are commonplace and caring relationships between teachers and students are the norm. Educators can improve student behavior, and the best, most successful among us are already doing this.

About the Book This book provides the tools and strategies educators can use to build the very sort of classroom atmospheres and cultures in which they dream of working.


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Chapter 1 focuses on the many academic and social benefits of teacher-student relationships and encourages educators to adopt a relationship-building mindset. Chapter 2 explores ways adults in school settings can show students that they care about them. And chapter 3 shares evidence-based research about ways educators can improve the culture of their school by creating an atmosphere in which all students feel welcomed. Chapter 4 discusses why teachers should not take negative student behavior personally and how they can consistently build teacher efficacy to avoid becoming a teacher-attrition statistic. Good teachers are far more than subject-matter instructors, and chapter 5 highlights the importance of classroom management and why it is necessary for teachers to foster and earn respect. Chapter 6 explains how teachers can connect through content and how students at risk are more likely to engage more in school when they see authenticity and relevance in the curriculum. To continue the conversation, chapter 7 looks at how to take something a student is interested in and relate it back to real life. Chapter 8 discusses the different approaches interventionists have taken to support students at risk, from the epidemiological model to the social constructivist model, all leading to the comprehensive ecological model. It also explores the benefits of taking an ecological approach, and educators will learn how to effectively use this approach to help students at risk succeed. Chapter 9 discusses how teachers can develop empathy for students at risk. We explore research into conducting home visits and the connection between these and a more empathetic approach. Following this realistic look at the home environment of students at risk, chapter 10 highlights the importance of teaching students at risk life skills as they contend with arduous living conditions and navigate through crises. Since many of these students have a catastrophic worldview and possess little or no hope for their futures, I introduce research demonstrating the importance of countering fatalism. Featured is a resilience program that worked to infuse hope in the students at my school. Chapter 11 discusses the psychological approach necessary to increase the selfesteem of students at risk, and chapter 12 discusses techniques educators can use to get to the root of a problem. Chapter 13 reveals how the most effective educators use empathetic listening, active listening, and reflective listening with students at risk. After listening, educators must be willing to open up, which is the subject of chapter 14. Educators who


Introduction

7

open up and share their own personal experiences with students at risk build trust and can use these opportunities as teachable moments. No one is perfect; students at risk need to know that we can all bounce back from mistakes. Chapter 15 shows how educators and teachers can promote social bonding among all students, especially students at risk, and emphasizes the importance of maintaining strong teacher-student relationships once they are established. The epilogue concludes the book and makes the case that building relationships with students at risk works. Its importance to the academic prospects and general well-being of students cannot be overemphasized. Each chapter in this book appears as an imperative, emphasizing the to-do factor. Educators must put forth the effort to bring about the achievement of their students at risk. The beginning of each chapter briefly introduces the topic of the chapter. The chapter then explores the research supporting the imperative. We will look at how the topic plays out in the real world with examples from firsthand experience. Then the text turns to the reader, encouraging you to reflect on a number of questions to both understand where you are in relation to the topic and where you want to go. The final section of each chapter charges readers to implement their new learning through a series of action steps. Note that while the stories in this book are true, I have used pseudonyms to conceal the identities of teachers, students, schools, and school districts. Many students put up barriers to avoid relationships with teachers because they have experienced abuse, neglect, or have been let down by an adult in the past. This puts students at risk. They need understanding, support, nurturing, and encouragement from their teachers and other school staff to be successful in school. This book gives teachers the tools to build the bridge to fill the gap between risk and promise and engage students through the power of relationships to help them succeed in school and in life.



Create an Effective Classroom Management Plan

S

ome educators show a lack of interest in relationship-building with students, and this may stem from a number of misguided concepts. One is a belief that they are subject-matter instructors only and, as such, are not responsible for discipline in the classroom. It is difficult to understand this viewpoint. No matter what subject you teach, the lessons are more effective when strong classroom management and positive relationships exist. Regardless of where we teach, getting to know students is essential. Only then do we foster relevant and engaging instruction and curriculum. If we fail to ask students who they are, where they live, and how they learn, we might create a curriculum lacking relevance and impact, which can adversely affect students’ academic success (Polleck & Shabdin, 2013).

Pride in subject-matter knowledge and content delivery is well and good. But without solid classroom management and authentic relationships, send does not equal receive. Teachers who state that their primary job is delivering subject matter and that building relationships is unimportant may simply be cloaking a shortcoming. Good teachers are far more than subject-matter instructors and require a classroom management plan that fosters respect. Perhaps the teachers need classroom-management skill building, or perhaps they are emotionally stung by previous failed attempts to establish relationships with students at risk. There is a distinct relationship between a teacher’s ability to assert

51

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

{ CHAPTER 5 }


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BUILDING BRIDGES

In this chapter, we will discuss what the research says about classroom management, how that caring environment plays out in the real world, as well as questions for reflection and action steps you can take to ensure students know you care about them.

What the Research Says Classroom management has been widely studied. Great Schools Partnership (2013b) defines classroom management as: The skills and techniques teachers use to keep students organized, orderly, focused, attentive, on task and academically productive during a class. When classroom-management strategies are executed effectively, teachers minimize the behaviors that impede learning for both individual students and groups of students, while maximizing the behaviors that facilitate or enhance learning.

Harry K. Wong is widely recognized as a guru on classroom management (Wong & Wong, 2009). He asserts that effective teachers implement “classroom management procedures that create consistency. Their classrooms are caring, thought-provoking, challenging and academically successful” (Wong & Wong, 2009, p. 3). Teachers can accomplish this by understanding the multiple purposes of classroom management and always striving for the objective of creating and maintaining positive relationships with students.

A Multifaceted Activity It is worth repeating that establishing relationships is paramount and foundational to being an effective teacher. This is also true in the classroom-management arena. As a staunch advocate for the necessity of building trusting relationships with students, I find the classroom management methods presented by Carolyn M. Evertson and Carol S. Weinstein (2006) to be particularly thoughtful. According to Evertson and Weinstein (2006), classroom management has dual purposes: “It not only seeks to establish and sustain an orderly environment, so students can engage in meaningful academic learning, it also aims to enhance student social and moral growth” (p. 4). They identify five tasks that show classroom management is a multifaceted activity.

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

effective classroom management and form positive relationships with students. Where the goal is to foster academic achievement, teachers need both of these skills. Every teacher faces struggles and endures failures; the best learn from these experiences and continue to strive.


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1. Developing caring, supportive relationships with and among students 2. Organizing and implementing instruction in ways that optimize students’ access to learning

4. Promoting the development of student social skills and self-regulation 5. Using appropriate interventions to assist students who exhibit behavior problems (p. 4)

Positive Relationships With Students Teachers, administrators, and educational researchers—whether it be due to daily practices, qualitative studies, data from observations, or implications resulting from recent studies—are all reaching the conclusion that positive relationships with students are a necessary component of effective classroom management. While discipline, conformity, and obedience have littered discussions of classroom management in the past, these terms and corresponding methods no longer are sufficient to address diverse urban classrooms. Karrie A. Jones, Jennifer L. Jones, and Paul J. Vermette’s (2013) study explores classroom management rich in context and relationships. They derived eight components of managing a highly productive, safe, and respectful urban environment. According to Jones et al. (2013), “Student-teacher relationships are the single most important component of classroom management and an essential part of creating a highly effective community of learners” (p. 24). Topping their list of eight components is teacher-student relationships. Jones et al. (2013) cite John Hattie (2009), who undertook an extensive review of more than eight hundred meta-analyses—including over fifty thousand studies and two hundred million students—and report that of the 130 factors considered, teacher-student relationships were the third most significant contributor to a student’s academic success. As the article progresses, Jones et al. (2013) cite Steven Wolk (2003), who also expressed that teacher-student relationships are the most important components of classroom management: “Such relationships manifest themselves in every aspect of the classroom, from the curriculum to the choice of teaching methods” (p. 24). Finally, as Jones et al. (2013) share their observations of an effective teacher interacting with her students, they urge that for highly successful classroom managers, relationships with students are the foundation on which all classroom management takes place. Gary Reglin, Joretta Akpo-Sanni, and Nonofo Losike-Sedimo (2012) also conclude that teachers can improve classroom management and student behavior by

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

3. Using group management methods that encourage student engagement with academic tasks


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establishing relationships with students at risk. They found that teachers are much more effective at classroom management and working with these students when they form relationships.

Effective professional development helps a range of teachers to develop or revise classroom management plans that aid in all-important relationship building. Although classroom management plans are useful tools for establishing procedures that foster respectful behavior toward teachers, they are not a panacea for dealing with the myriad of problems that students carry into the classroom. Teachers must establish classroom management plans that include a continuous effort to build and sustain relationships with their students. It behooves teachers to veer away from the subject-matter-expert-only mindset. Without effective classroom discipline, best achieved through positive relationship-building efforts, the most well-delivered content will fall flat. In Joshua M. Englehart’s (2012) article “Five Half-Truths About Classroom Management,” Englehart delves into the premises of five widely accepted classroom management principles, one of which is that it’s all about relationships. Englehart (2012) shares the premise that classroom management is all about relationships because respect naturally “accompanies teacher-student relationships in which genuine caring is demonstrated” (p. 70). Englehart (2012) effectively explains that one of the benefits of teacher-student relationships is its motivational effects. Students who like their teachers are motivated to please them and actively work to maintain positive relationships. Once the relationship is established, they avoid negative behaviors that could jeopardize the relationship. So, teachers who invest the necessary time and energy into establishing positive relationships with students reap not only the personal rewards that manifest from those connections but also the benefits of having a classroom atmosphere that is more conducive to learning. Even though Englehart (2012) considers the notion that “it’s all about relationships” to be only a half-truth, he still conveys that “beyond the returns relationships

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

After identifying a problem in which elementary students at risk were too often disrupting their classrooms, they investigated the effect a Professional Development Classroom Management Model (PDCMM) would have on reducing students’ misbehaviors. A focus of the PDCMM was to train and encourage teachers to treat students with respect, warmth, and support. This study finds that a proactive and preventative intervention is effective in curbing discipline problems and suspensions when implemented in individual classrooms after intensive teacher professional development.


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While firmly establishing the benefits that relationships have on classroom management, Englehart (2012) warns that these alone are not sufficient for all students. This especially applies to students who may be at risk for repeated behavior infractions because their individual needs have gone unaddressed. Englehart (2012) cites Ross W. Greene (2008), who describes that the process of addressing the needs of students involves “demonstrating empathy, defining the problem, and inviting the student to find solutions in a collaborative way” (p. 73), all of which are addressed in later chapters.

What It Looks Like in the Real World As an assistant principal, I worked with several teachers to help foster caring and efficient educational environments in their classrooms. Mr. Z. was a veteran English teacher who had expert content knowledge in his subject area but little knowledge of how to connect with students. He would send students to the discipline office every hour on the hour of the school day. Most of his referrals read, “Disrupting the class.” There was not any specific information about the students’ actions or what behavior resulted in the referral being written. It was almost as if he had prewritten referrals with the phrase “Disrupting the class,” added the student’s name and date, and handed out the referrals like hotcakes. The frequency with which he sent students to my office prompted me to schedule time to do an observation in his classroom. I pulled Mr. Z.’s lesson plans for the week for his freshman English class and went to the classroom where the majority of his referrals came from. Mr. Z. was inside the classroom when students came to the class, not at the door greeting students. I inconspicuously sat in the back of the room. The students milled around the room for a couple of minutes before sitting at their desks. Mr. Z. repeatedly yelled out, “You all are going to receive zeroes for not completing the sponge activity in time.” Eleven out of twenty-four students began doing the bell-ringer on the board. Mr. Z. did not give positive praise to the students who were completing the activity, nor did he encourage his off-task students to focus on their work. As the students who finished the assignment started walking their papers up to the teacher’s desk, Mr. Z. said, “Who told anyone to get out of their seat?”

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

provide in terms of instructional and classroom-management effectiveness, quality relationships also feed students’ developmental needs. Relationships provide a sense of emotional security that would otherwise be missing for some kids” (p. 72). They provide important models for social interaction and are necessary for classroom management.


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This showed me that he had not established any routines in his class—he and the students were not on the same page as to how to distribute and collect papers.

Instead of addressing the talkative students from each group by name, Mr. Z. yelled, “Hey, haven’t I told you guys to stop talking when I’m talking? You are disrupting my class, and I’m going to send you to the dean’s office.” Then I discovered that I was correct about how Mr. Z. gave students referrals and sent them to the office, but it was even worse than I had imagined. Mr. Z. said, “Hey, you in the red shirt, what is your name?” The student replied, “Marcus.” Mr. Z. pulled a referral form from his desk, wrote Marcus’s name and the date on it, and sent him to the dean’s office with a prefilled referral that read “Disrupting the class.” The next day, I met with Mr. Z. I asked him to be reflective and tell me two good things about how his lesson went and two things that needed improvement. After listening to his response, my most pressing question for him was, “How is it the third week of school and you have not learned your students’ names or demonstrated any evidence that you are building relationships with them?” Mr. Z. admitted that he had a difficult time getting to know his students and instead focused on delivering content in response to feeling overwhelmed by his department chairperson to cover the content within a particular amount of time. To support Mr. Z., I supplied him with several models of classroom management plans and advised him to tailor them to his needs and the needs of his students. We then discussed the importance of building relationships with students, and I gave him ten strategies for getting to know his students and learning more about them. I gave the following list to Mr. Z. 1. Use icebreakers with students. 2. Issue a questionnaire to your students.

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

Mr. Z. then tried to teach his lesson. He discussed the importance of citing textual evidence when answering questions. He did not use a hook to gain students’ interest, nor did he explain why the objective of the lesson was relevant to students. As he attempted to explain the assignment, two small groups of students on opposite sides of the room continued to have sidebar conversations. Instead of using proximity and walking near the students, Mr. Z. stayed near the front of the class by the SMART Board and raised his voice to talk over the students.


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3. Have one-on-one conversations with one or two students per class per day.

5. Have students write goals they have in life and share yours with them as well. 6. Invite students to share personal artifacts that help show their interests. 7. Have students interview each other and share what they learned about one another. 8. Have students write and share a short poem about themselves. 9. Give five students two compliments per class for a week. Choose five different students every week. 10. Community-build in class through circles or morning meetings at least once per week. As Mr. Z. implemented these ideas, his classroom management skills grew along with his relationships with his students. This newly attained knowledge about his students helped him intervene early to avoid problems that he had previously experienced in his classroom. Students also responded more respectfully to his redirects because mutual respect was finally being established. One of the biggest differences was that Mr. Z. learned how to plan more engaging lessons that included his students’ interests. In addition, he became more empathetic toward his students, sought to understand them, and preferred to keep them in class learning as opposed to sending them to the dean as swiftly as he had in the past. Along these lines, as teachers become more adept at classroom management, they can use the very content they teach as the vehicle for strengthening relationships; I cover this in more detail in the next chapter.

Questions for Reflection Use the following four questions to reflect on what you have learned in this chapter. You may choose to journal about them or discuss them with a partner or small group to gain further insights. 1. What behaviors that your students display tend to make you upset? 2. Anticipating the behavior, what plan can you put in place to handle it appropriately without allowing your emotions to show?

Copyright Š 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

4. Have students write goals they have for your class and how you might help them.


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BUILDING BRIDGES

3. What actions have you taken to get to know your students better? Have they been effective?

Action Steps Following are three action steps you can take right now to apply what you have learned and help students at risk in your classroom. 1. Conduct at least two hands-on and engaging icebreaker activities with your students to get to know them better and to help them get acquainted with each other as well. 2. Plan meaningful and engaging lessons that are relevant to students, and teach bell to bell. This will limit the likelihood of students being disruptive in class. 3. Use the reproducible “Classroom Management Plan” to create a classroom management plan and enforce it consistently. The first half is an example of a classroom management plan that may give you some ideas on how to set up your own. Write a plan that works for you and your students, and carry it out consistently.

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

4. What are some actions you can take to build a stronger community in your class?


REPRODUCIBLE

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Classroom Management Plan

Example First infraction:                                Warning Second infraction:                               Conference in the hall Third infraction:                               Accountability and reflection paper Fourth infraction:                               Phone call home Fifth infraction:                               Teacher-issued detention Sixth infraction:                               Office discipline referral

Classroom Management Plan First infraction:

Second infraction:

Third infraction:

Fourth infraction:

Fifth infraction:

Sixth infraction:

Building Bridges © 2019 Solution Tree Press • SolutionTree.com Visit go.SolutionTree.com/behavior to download this free reproducible.

Copyright © 2019 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.

Use the following example to help you develop an effective classroom management plan.


Building Bridges

—Baruti Kafele Author, Educational Consultant, and Retired Principal

“Building Bridges is an insightful guide packed with information for educators, especially those who work with students at risk. Author Don Parker cites evidence-based research and offers practical strategies to help educators build and maintain strong teacher-student relationships.”

Readers will: • Understand how to effectively reach students at risk • Read and learn from the author’s firsthand experience leading and teaching students at risk • Discover how school culture and climate affect student behavior • Use chapter-ending questions to reflect on the book’s content • Create a plan to help students at risk, using each chapter’s action steps Visit go.SolutionTree.com/behavior to download the free reproducibles in this book. ISBN 978-1-947604-35-3 90000

SolutionTree.com

9 781947 604353

Don Parker

—Rose M. Thomas Former Administrative Dean of Students, Bremen High School District 228, Midlothian, Illinois

B

uilding Bridges: Engaging Students at Risk Through the Power of Relationships features evidence-based strategies to create positive relationships with students at risk to help them succeed in school and life. Based on his own experience teaching and leading students at risk, author Don Parker explains how zero-tolerance policies are not effective and, instead, how building trusting teacherstudent relationships improve students’ behavior and lead to academic achievement. Parker provides the guidance necessary for K–12 teachers and leaders to create a school culture that promotes student success.

Engaging Students at Risk Through the Power of Relationships

“In Building Bridges, author Don Parker delivers a powerful book on how to build meaningful relationships with students at risk of failing in school. As a seasoned and effective urban school teacher and principal, Parker understands firsthand why relationships, compassion, and empathy for students matter and are prerequisites to academic success. This book is a must-read for anyone working with students who are at risk but have the potential for greatness.”


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