39 WAYS TO BE HAPPY

39 WAYS TO BE HAPPY

Jasmine Birtles

“Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.”

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Don’t read books on happiness

They will make you feel stressed and no good because you’re not doing what they say you should be doing and you don’t think you ever will…. on the other hand, though, you could skim through one like, say, this one, and just pick out a couple of ideas that take your fancy and follow them.

Just change one bad habit to a good one

Don’t bust a gut… just pick one thing that you keep doing that makes you down and change that. Even if it takes all year to change it, keep going.

Do the washing up

Yes, really! Studies show that completing a task gives you great satisfaction. If you complete lots of small tasks (like washing up, sorting out drawers and cupboards or mowing the lawn) you will feel a little happier each time as you will have achieved something. In fact, decluttering can even help you lose weight (seriously!)

Never, ever, read women’s magazines… …unless it’s just for the recipes or things to make. They are full of terrible ‘advice’ particularly about relationships, and they make women, and the men they live with, very unhappy.

If only we'd stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.

- Edith Wharton

Giving of yourself gets you out of the house and out of yourself. Pick an activity you like - if you love animals, help at a refuge, if you like trains, volunteer at a local steam railway. You get the idea. Indeed some forms of volunteering can even land you a free holiday.

Try not to compare yourself to others

It’s a tough one as it seems to be part of the human condition to compare, so if you have to do so, at least compare yourself to people or creatures who are in a worse state than yourself. In fact, that’s another good reason to volunteer!

Cut down, or better still cut out, alcohol

It’s a depressant and does untold damage both physically, financially (you can save £1,000’s by cutting it out) and socially. It also messes up your sleep which can make you grumpier.

“Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances.”

- Anonnymous

Exercise regularly…

…ideally outdoors. Regular activity, and certainly proper exercise, even if it’s just walking, lifts our spirits and physical well-being.

Go to church

Really. Over and over, studies show that those who visit a place of worship regularly tend to be happier than those who don’t. The Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index found that people who attend a church, synagogue, or mosque frequently report experiencing more positive emotions and fewer negative ones in general than do those who attend less often or not at all.

Wean yourself off fast foods

They make you sluggish and pasty and they don’t have the nutrition you need.

12. Take joy in little things

After all, it’s the little things that make life good. Consciously appreciate the flowers in the street, the small kindnesses around you, the sunshine when it comes. This is all real wealth and shouldn’t be squandered.

“Be honest. Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”

- Mahatma Gandhi

Turn to the light

Phrases like “life’s a bitch and then you die” are actually not true and part of a darkened, false sense of life. Consciously turn to something good that you know is true any time thoughts like these come up (and they regularly do, let’s be honest!)

Be grateful

Really grateful. Show your gratitude by helping those who have helped you where you can, as well as thanking them.

Use social media sparingly…

…if at all. It fosters rivalry, dissatisfaction and loneliness. If you do use it then ‘prune’ your social contacts so that you only have people you genuinely know and like in your ‘network’.

Try to do it for longer and longer periods. You will find yourself calmer and often nicer for it!

“Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.”

- Dale Carnegie

Cherish and work on all your relationships…

…

whether it’s family, work, friends, or any other types of relationships. Every one matters and every one is far more important than things you own or any of the fripperies of everyday living.

Get into simple living

There are lots of simple-living organisations on the net so check out their tips. It’s about freedom, living on less, needing less, getting rid of stuff and the things that weigh us down. It also tends to mean less work for you too!

De-clutter

Obviously I would say this because I started the national Clear Your Clutter campaign but seriously, de-junking your life of physical, mental and emotional stuff gives you freedom, peace and at least some happiness.

Smile every chance you get

Consciously smile more. It’s the best anti-ageing beauty product on the market - seriously. Smile at strangers: it will make them happy and confuse the heck out of them!

“The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

- Mark Twain

Laugh regularly

Not at people but with people or just on your own at your own little jokes. Laugh at the absurdities of life. Laugh even if you don’t feel like it and that will help you get into the habit. It really can help as you see here.

Be unconditional with your love

This is a tough one but it has to be done. It demands a lot of us and mainly it forces us to be more spiritual and less material in our view of ourselves and others. Not everyone is willing to do this but if you’re up for the struggle it reaps dividends. Dogs can do it so it can’t really be that hard.

Don’t indulge bad moods

We think we’re ‘just in a mood’ but it is in our power to lift ourselves out of it.

Make the effort. The more you do, the easier it gets each time.

Make gratitude a habit

It can be simply going through all the good things you have (including basics that we take for granted like health, trees and flowers, food in the fridge etc).

“Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad.”

- Norm Papernick

Do random acts of kindness

Do things for people or for the world in general to ‘give back’. You don’t have to tell people that’s why you’re doing it. Just do it.

Don’t live in the past

Stop looking at what you have lost, so you can see what you have. Really be disciplined about this one because the world is constantly telling us what we don’t have, what we’ve lost and what we can’t have. Most of it isn’t true anyway but if we keep agreeing with the world’s view, we won’t have what we need and want.

Don’t imagine that things or even activities in themselves will make you happy. It really is an attitude of mind. Right now a lot of people are happy with far less than what you and I have.

“Things” wont make you happy

Focus on the good

Talk about your blessings more than you talk about your problems. Please! There’s no one more tedious than a continuous complainer. The ones who complain the most are usually the ones who have been given a lot more than the rest.

“A bad attitude is like a flat tire, you can’t get very far until you change it.”

Watch the ‘grass is greener’ mentality

Sometimes people throw away something good for something they think is better, only to find out down the road that the ‘good’ was actually more than good enough and the ‘better’ never even came close.

Give love to get love

The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give. Yes, that might sound twee but it’s actually, measurably true. Stop complaining about the love you’re not getting from others and really work at loving them, whatever the situation.

Don’t care what others think of you

One of the greatest freedoms is truly not minding what we imagine everyone else thinks of us. To do that, though, we need to be a lot more tolerant of and ‘merciful’ to others. Brene Brown has some useful things to say about that here.

Don’t be afraid of change

If you go with it, you will often find that even if you have lost something good, because of that ‘loss’, you gained something even better.

“Happiness is not a goal, it is a by-product.”

- Eleanor Roosevelt

33 Stretch yourself

Being willing to get out of our ‘comfort zone’ is an instant happiness booster.

Worry is the mafia of the mind

It doesn’t change anything. All it does is steal our joy and hinder our ability to make positive changes. Stop it. Just stop - even if it takes years to do!

Grudges are a waste of happiness

Drop the weight. What other people do or have done are not what make us happy or unhappy. It’s our thought of them.

Be different

Eccentrics are often happier than ‘normal’ people because they don’t care what other people think and they do things based on their own judgment of something as opposed to what’s popular.

“Happiness cannot be travelled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed.

Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.”

- Denis Waitley

Think for yourself

Do your own research. Just because other people are doing something doesn’t mean it’s good. In fact, the more popular something is, usually the stupider it is (look at what’s popular on social media and on the TV – it’s mostly junk!)

Keep learning new things

You are never too old to learn and grow. It keeps you healthy and happy.

Don’t look for happiness

Happiness itself isn’t the right thing to look for anyway. It’s really too ephemeral and self-centred. It’s joy that we should be aiming for - a deeper, more fulfilling and less selforiented thing. You can usually learn about that in spiritual writings.

“Happiness is never stopping to think if you are.”

- Palmer Sondreal