SUPPORT GROUPS

WRITTEN BY JULIE ZICKOVICH

As the Program Assistant at Roots, I recently attended a support group facilitator training and have been excited to lead our weekly Feeding Support Circle ever since. When my son was born, he struggled with gaining weight. I thought we were doing OK, and then suddenly we were overwhelmed by clinical advice and trips to providers followed by breastfeeding, pumping and bottle feeding – all in succession in the middle of the night. I felt isolated, alone and like I was failing. My son is older now, but I often reflect on my early days of being a mom with some regret. My son was cared for, all eyes were on him, but I needed someone to ask how I was doing. No one ever genuinely did.

At Roots we offer support groups to provide new moms and dads with the social support that all parents need. Our Feeding Support Circle, one of our many groups, is a place for moms to break the isolation, be listened to and find connection. It’s the group that I really needed when my son was little.

Now I know everyone needs support. As humans we are social beings; we crave relationships and belonging. Social support is not only important, it is essential through all stages of life. As women and new moms, we are taught we can do it all, that breastfeeding should be easy or that we should be overjoyed to be a mom. However, we often (if not always) have challenges and struggles and are not able to voice how we really feel. Research shows that not having community, connection and social support makes us feel even more isolated, alone and – in the case of early parenting – increases the potential of postpartum depression, anxiety or rage.

At Roots we offer weekly and monthly groups to families in various stages of parenting. There is a group for families experiencing loss, a group for dads, three groups for new moms (virtually and in person) and a special group centered around the joys and challenges of feeding a baby. We also offer Re:born, our Sunday evening gathering at Farmer’s Daughters Café for moms in all stages of parenting. Check out the centerfold in the Roots Perinatal Resource Guide for all the details on our groups.

Our support group facilitators are trained using the Group Peer Support (GPS) model, which recognizes the importance of social peer-to-peer support and has a beautiful framework for creating a space that is as safe as possible for participants. At every session, we create a welcoming environment and begin each group with guidelines requesting confidentiality, listening with nonjudgement, no advice, welcoming all emotions. All parents are welcome, and for many just showing up is enough.

I also help plan our annual event, Moms Like Me, and have watched the storytellers work through their stories and speak their truth on stage. After witnessing these courageous mothers tell their stories, I believed in the power of storytelling but could never explain it. Doing the GPS training and facilitating our support groups have given me more clarity on the subject. Throughout history, we women have not had power in our voice and I would argue this is still true today during pregnancy, childbirth, parenting and even into menopause. Speaking your truth is a revolutionary act. It normalizes the experience of motherhood and it leads to resilience, power and transformation. We all have our own experiences but collectively we find strength, courage and power.

All families need support and connection. Becoming a parent is not easy. I would encourage you, wherever you are, to connect with Roots and join us at one of our support groups.

Julie Zickovich is a Bozeman native and the Program Assistant at Roots Family Collaborative. Two of her favorite things are finding new trails and snuggles with her son Ivan.