My Expectations for Hiking with my Kids were a Joke

(A personal story of a hiking mishap)

WRITTEN BY LORI JO BERG

Expectations. One little word that carries so much meaning.

As I walk this journey with my third child, I’ve come to realize the biggest change from my first to my third lies in my expectations.

With the first, my expectations were unrealistically high in every area possible and led to severe anxiety and the constant feeling of failure in all areas of life.

Hiking with my firstborn was no exception, as my expectations went something like this: » She was going to LOVE it, because I would time everything perfectly so that she could sleep while I walked. » I’d have plenty of wonderful snacks on hand so we wouldn’t have to stop or deal with meltdowns. » I’d pick the perfect trail at the right time of day so the barking dogs wouldn’t wake her. » The best part? I’d get a workout in and spend time with my little girl all at once. How hard could it be? I had it all figured out for my first outing with my 8-month-old.

As you can imagine, our hike went something more like this: » She slept in the car on the way there, strike one. » She pooped her pants 10 minutes in and we stopped for 20 minutes, strike two. » When she did fall asleep, a frantic dog woke her, strike three. (Note to self, Sourdough Trail on a weekend is not the place to go for a peaceful, somewhat dog-free zone). » We topped the day off with a sunburn on the top of her head because I may have forgotten to pull the sunshade up on the pack, the strikes just kept coming.

Oh, how things have changed as I wander into the woods with my now three young children. Simply put, my perspective and expectations are in a completely different place.

The goal isn’t to keep moving or reach some landmark destination. Simply being present in nature with my kids and teaching them all it has to offer is what fills my cup.

I’m happy to stop 50 times to pick up rocks, sticks, flowers or any other oh-so-fascinating object simply because my perspective has changed. I now expect to take off my backpack (still filled with snacks) at least 15 times because someone absolutely needs something. If they sleep, great. If they don’t, they’ll fall asleep eventually, somewhere at some point.

Don’t get me wrong, I still miss summiting peaks, getting my heart rate up and zoning out as the birds chirp.

One thing I’ve found helpful is to get my body moving before the hike so I can stop and relish the slow, stop-and-smell-the-roses pace children like to move at.

I’ve also come to learn that my 5- and 7-year-olds enjoy hiking much more when there is a treasure hunt involved. Who can spot the tiniest pinecone, a squirrel, a chirping bird or a yellow flower first? They seem to forget their walking as they focus on the hunt, which means less complaining.

Oh, and an adventure pack is essential. Pack it with binoculars, a first aid kit, a flashlight and whatever else you can think of.

Kids are so great at teaching us life lessons. They’ve taught me to manage my expectations in all that I do, and that has made all the difference on this parenting journey.

Lori Jo is a Montana Native, mother of three and freelance writer who enjoys writing about the tougher side of life and connecting with her audience on a deeper level.