22 SPORTS MOPEDS
The smell of two-stroke, the tall tales of derring-do and the local chippy – for a generation, these two little stink-wheels represent nostalgia at its very finest.
WORDS: ALAN DOWDS AND DAVE SMITH PHOTOGRAPHY: JOHN GOODMAN Variety: it’s your actual spice of life, isn’t it? And it’s one of the things that I was missing when I was sat down in the middle of ‘Lockdown Three’. I guess we all suffered our own ‘daily grind’ – mine was a Groundhog Day mix of wake up, work, home schooling, internet trolling, work, looking out the window, going for a walk, Netflix, bed – which was getting us all down. Thankfully I had my various project bikes – the Yamaha Fazer 600, my turbo ZRX1100, the mighty Burgman 650 – to keep me going and (just before winter gripped London last year) I got out for one of the most hilarious road tests I’ve done in recent years. Like all the best stories, this one starts off almost by accident. I’m chatting to John Goodman, ace snapper, about the good old days. For him that mostly means Z1s in the 1970s and drag racing, but he’s got a million mates with interesting old two-wheelers, including his very good friend Stuart, who’s got an immaculate Yamaha FS1-E apparently. I mention it to Bertie, who immediately seizes upon it, and sends us out to find another 1970s moped for a two-bike test. John comes up trumps after a week or so, tracking down a totally mint Suzuki AP50, owned by a fellow called Mark just up the road in Ashford – only a few miles away from Stuart’s house. Bingo! A few weeks later I’m stood on a residential Middlesex street, watching two mint-condition 1970s mopeds burbling and tinkling and smoking away in front of me, the exhaust fumes rising up into the chilly-yet-sunny blue sky. I always get a weird ‘time travel’ feeling when I ride a mint version of an old bike, because the tech is obviously from the past – but in as-new condition. The cast metal switchgear, with hilariously scant functions, fresh paint, shiny chrome rims, every nut and bolt with the original finish in place, not a bit of rust – it’s absolutely nothing like a normal old bike. Dave Smith is sucking on his roll-up, checking the bikes out too, and there’s a real Life on Mars feel about the whole scene, like I’ve been transported back to the late 1970s. I half expect a Vauxhall Viva or Ford Anglia to appear round the corner at any minute.
Honesty time: I completely missed out on the moped thing, partly because I only really got into bikes when I was already 17, so could go straight on to a CG125, and mainly because the laws had changed so much by the late 1980s. By then, mopeds were generally basic automatic step-thrus, restricted to 30mph, and I’d written them off as mere shopper/ commuter fare, suitable only for district nurses or spinsters on the way to Fine Fare, or lessthan-masculine Frank Spencer types who worked for the council. I couldn’t miss the moped lore though, especially from guys a few years older than me. Alongside the fabled 250cc learner law and Sidewinder leaning-tea-tray sidecars, it was the stuff of moto-legend. Tall tales of 60mph Yamaha Fizzies, arcane tips for fitting C90 parts to Honda SS50s, heated debate over which version of the AP50 was fastest – it all trickled into my subconscious; useless, but utterly intriguing knowledge, which I eagerly soaked up. Time to see what I can remember… Dave, stub that fag out (in an eco-friendly way), let’s saddle up! I pick the sweet little FS1-E first, its purple paint gleaming in the sun. As I swing a leg over, I’m really struck by the front-mudguardmounted numberplate, as it’s the first time I’ve ever ridden a bike with one of these. It’s hard to believe that curved, scythe-like edge ever got past the drawing board, but maybe life was much cheaper in the old days. Like my last CMM road test on the Kawasaki H2 750, there are a few little tricks in the FS1-E. The gearbox has neutral at the top, and a fourdown change, which catches me out instantly. I’m a fast learner though, and soon adapt. It’s obviously a small machine, but has more of a ‘proper bike’ feel than many other 50cc machines I’ve ridden. That proper bike feel lasts right up until the end of the road when I hit the brakes… and nothing much happens. I’ve not ridden a bike with a drum front brake for a fair while, and honestly, the little Yam has worse brakes than my old push bike at home. Terrifying, but at least I know now, and the rest of the test sees some very cautious distancing indeed.
