Pretty in Pink: The Expectations of Women in Rome Haley Bodner

Pretty in Pink: The Expectations ofWomen in Rome

Haley Bodner

Ancient Rome was a hotbed of masculine ideals, an empire built on the military triumphs

and the powerfulambitions ofmen. However, oftenforgotten to history are the women who

stood beside their fathers, husbands, and sons throughout their military and political careers.

Women, often confined to the household and rearing of children in many other ancient societies,

had a prevalent rolein Ancient Rome. Their responsibilitieschanged from the time of kings to

the time of emperors, but whatwas expected of their personalitiesremained constant. The purity

and grace of a daughter, the loyalty of a wife, and the kindness and knowledge of a mother were

all essential qualities for women throughout Rome’s historyas is shown through the works of

Livy and Ancient Roman funeral descriptions.

The instrumental role played by women in the founding of Rome isquite clearlyevident

even from its first origins; their significance is seen through the actions of the Sabine women.

When Romulus foundedRome, he invited the exiles of the surrounding towns. These men

wished for a new start, which Romulus offered

them in his new city on the hill. However, a

glaring problem struck the new Romans. Alack

of women would result in their city dying out in

the generation. Romulus’ legacy was to find a

great city, not one that would succumb to

fading out in his lifetime. To remedy this problem, Romulus called on the neighboring cities to

join Rome in the festival of Consualia, a festival honoring a deity of the harvest and stored

grains. Recently snubbed by the Sabines, Romulus’ plan primarily targeted them. As Livy tells it,

“The show began, and nobody had eyes or thoughts for anything else. This was the Roman’s

opportunity: at a given signal all the able-bodied men burst through the crowd and seized the

young women” (Livy 41). This is the story of the first women of Rome and how their actions

would make a lasting impression on the expectations of women for centuries to come.

To ease the worries of the taken women, Romulus moved among them and assured them

that married women would share in the fortunes of Rome. The men themselves echoed Romulus’

sentiments, speaking sweet words and promising that love had prompted their offense. These

words touched the women’s hearts and prompted them to forget their anger andforge proper

bonds with their new husbands. The frustrations of their fathers and brothers werenot so easily

talked away, however. The Sabines, along with several of the neighboring tribes, attempted to

wage war against the Romans, ending in a series of military defeats for the challengers.

Meanwhile, Rome grew stronger and improved their own reputation with their military victories.

The final advance of the Sabines was led by Mettius Curtius, who suffered humiliationfromthe

Roman’s charge. However, thebattle was never completed.

Seeing the slaughter of their fathers, brothers, husbands, and sons, the Sabine women

stepped intobattle. In Livy’s words, “With loosened hair and rent garments they braved the

flying spears and thrust their way in a body

between the embattled armies” (Livy 45). While

separating their warring families, the women

begged their fathers, protesting that “our children

are your sons-your grandsons: do not put on them

the stain of parricide…turn your anger against us. We are the cause of strife…we would rather

die ourselves than live on either widowed or orphaned” (Livy 45,46). Moments after this call for

peace, the rival captains stepped forward to officially outline the terms of peace. These brave

women united the two cities, doubling Rome’s population with their plea.

As one can see in the story of the Sabines, women were influential in Rome from the time

of the city’s foundation. The women had sway over their husbands and fathers, showing that

their opinions must have been valued by the men at that time. Thebravery and loyalty exhibited

by the Sabine women remained crucial traits to women in Rome. They were expected to defend

their husbands’ and fathers’ honor while still remainingloyal to their husbands.

These virtues of bravery and loyalty are once again praised in the first century BC, as

seenin funeral inscriptions made by husbandsto their wives. Most notably, inthe “Praise of

Turia” a mourning husband recounts his wife’s bravery throughout the turbulent civil wars.

While her husband was absent, Turia persecuted those who wished to steal her inheritance. After

her parents were murdered, she defended her and her husband’s claim to the inheritance “with so

much dedication, even if we [her husband and brother-in-law] had been present, we could not

have presented a better case than you did” (Inscriptions 453). As a result of her strong

arguments, the case was dropped against her. As told by her husband, “you had succeeded in the

task you had taken entirely upon yourself, namely to defend obligation to your father, your

familial duty to your sister, and your loyalty to me” (Inscriptions 453). This source was written

several hundred years after the Sabine women ended the war of their fathers and husbands, thus

exhibitingthat Romanmen continued to value the women in their lives.

In the “Praise of Turia,”her husband outlines the significance of her bravery and courage.

He dedicates several paragraphs of her funeral speech to outlining the amazing deeds she did.

Additionally, he highlights other praised virtues that she had in common with other women. Her

modesty, religious dedication, wool working, and general kindnessare all admired by her

husband (Inscriptions 453). These virtues were also praised in other funeral speeches to mothers,

wives, and daughters, showing how widely these qualities were desired in the society.

Although many of these funeral inscriptions are shorter than“Praise of Turia”, they

convey the same raw emotions of grief and love. Children wrote of their mothersso that they

could “recall her many great deeds, as a way of healing the terrible wound of grief that gnaws at

our hearts” (Inscriptions 470). In these speeches and engravings, people praise the other

significant virtues that Turia’s speech breezed over. A father highlights his daughter’s superior

beauty along with her skills in wool-spinning and singing. Grieving children remembertheir

mother’s truthful nature, reverence for the gods, good sense, fertility, and chastity(Inscriptions

469).

While many of these virtues expected of women originate from the Sabines, the

expectations of chastity can be traced back to the founding of

the republic. Under the reign of King Tarquin the Proud, the

princesdecided that they would have a contest of wives. One

soldier claimed that Lucretia will win without a doubt. When

they met her, she is spinningwoolwhile the otherwives were

engaged in a gluttonous feast (Livy 100). Sextus Tarquinius

fell in love with her at first sight and made plans to take her.

When night fell, Sextus snuck into Lucretia’s room and threatened her with death. She did not

fear death butsuccumbed to his threat of dishonoring her and allowed Sextus to have his way

with her. In the words of Livy, “even the most resolute chastity could not have stood against this

dreadful threat” (Livy 101). Lucretia wrote to her fatherand husband, urging themto come toher

immediatelywith a trusted friend. Upon arrival, she explained what had happened. All three men

claimed she was innocent of the sin as “it was the mind…that sinned, not the body: without

intention there could never be guilt” (Livy 102). Despite this, Lucretia committed suicide after

they promised thatSextus would be punished. The trusted friend, Lucius Brutus, swore on her

blood that he would avenge her. Returning to Rome, Brutus and the others present drove the

Tarquin family out of the city by turning the population against the tyrant.

Lucretia’s chastity was valued among women throughout Rome’s history. Adulterous

actions were punishable by death or banishment for women. At the fall of the Republic, the

loyalty and chastity of a man’s wife had significant ties to the man’s reputation as well. Gaius

Julius Caesar divorced his second wife, Pompeia, on the suspicion of adultery with a Roman

politician (Suetonius 3). The suspected action led to a judiciary inquiry into the politician and

Pompeia, thus beginning the Bona Dea scandal. However, this same code of conduct was not

held to men as Julius Caesar became knownas “every woman’s husband and every man’s wife”

(Suetonius 25). This emphasis on women’s loyalty was ingrained into many ancient societies,

and Rome was no exception to this rule.

However, compared to many civilizations present in the Mediterranean basin and Middle

East during this time, Roman women enjoyed many freedoms. The women of classical Athens

were expected “to live secluded lives, out of the public eye, largely segregatedfrom men and

male social life” (Beard 307). In contrast, Roman women seemed to enjoy much more freedom

in a more integrated society. The household was not divided into male and female spheres, and

many women in Rome did assist their husbands in business. In an epigraph in dedication to his

wife, a Romanman spoke of his wife as an “ally in [his]business dealings in Rome” crediting her

with keeping the house safe. The epigraph also mentions that the wife helped her husbandin

advising him in business, showing that a women’s intelligence in business, and the home was

valued among the populace(Inscriptions 471).

This involvement in business andmore flexible household gender rolesallowed for women in

Rome to have much more freedomthan their counterparts in other ancient civilizations.

Most shocking compared to other ancient civilizationsis the right to property that women

held. When married, a womandid not have to become the property of her husbandor take his

name, insteadshehad the choice to remain the property of her father, thus securingher

inheritance. After her father’s death, a woman was entitled to aninheritance, buyingand selling

property in her own name, creatinga will, and freeingher slaves, provided that she was still a

member of his family(Beard 308). These rights werenearlyunheard of in the ancient times, as

the woman often lost her inheritance to her husbandwhen she married. By giving women the

choice to remain the property of their father’s family, Rome once again shows to be more

progressive then other ancient civilizations. Not unlike other civilizations, Rome required

women to have a guardian, known as a tutor, approve her decisions and transactions. When

Augustus came into power during the early Empire, one of his reforms was to remove the

required guardian for freeborn women who had three children; for women who were ex-slaves,

four children were required. When Roman women fulfilled their womanly virtues, in this case

having threeor more children, they were granted additional freedoms. However, in other

societies, these virtues were merely expected of the women. In these other societies, a woman’s

virtues were not acknowledged in a political or social sphere.

As was custom in every ancient society, women in Rome were expected to marry and

have children. When belonging to the higher classes, women had little control overwhomthey

married. Their marriages were often to secure their father’s or brother’s political campaigns by

using a marriage to gather allies. During the First Triumvirate, Gaius Julius Caesar married his

daughter Julia to his allyPompey to secure his loyalty. These political marriages were not always

unhappy. Pompey and Julia were believed to have been deeply devoted to each other, to the point

where her death led to the breakdown of Pompey’sand Caesar’s political alliance (Beard 310).

Through her marriage, thewoman wasexpected to give birth to an heir for her husband.

A wife’s fertility wasone of the many praised attributes in the epigraphs recovered from the

Roman Empire. However, this expectation carried a

large risk to a woman’s health during this time.

Childbirth was the biggest killer of young women

throughout the ancient world, to which Rome was

no exception. The lack of hospitals and modern

medicine led to many deathscaused by hemorrhages, infections, and obstructionsthat are now

preventable. Also lacking any form of reliable contraceptives, women spent a large portion of

their lives pregnant. If theysurvived childbirth, women were still not guaranteed an easy life. As

manyas half ofthe children born in Rome died before reaching ten years old, creating a cycle of

mourning for the family. Despite past speculation that the high infant mortality rate meant

ancient parents did not create emotional attachment to their children, they in fact did mourn the

loss of each of their children (Beard 317). Many touching epigraphs expressedthe grief of

fathers and mothers, oneto an infant who left behind her “grieving mother and father” tells that

they both“weep for her as she lies, little body enclosed in a marble tomb” (Inscriptions 472).

The expectation to bear children with terrible odds for their own survival while also having to

overcome the depression thatmust follow losing a child, show that the women of the time were

expected to be both mentally and physicallystrong.

The expectations for Roman women spana wide spectrumof traits: bravery,

courageousness, modesty, loyalty, chastity, intelligence, beauty, fertility, and strength. Despite

the factmany ancient societies expected women to take a subservient role in society, the

personality expected of Roman women clearly painted by Livy and the funeral epigraphs shows

them in a brighter light. The women ofAncient Rome were valued for more than just their

beauty and fertility, with many having to be the main breadwinner when their husbands were in

political exile. The more diverseduties expected of a woman in ancient Rome also lead to a

lengthier list of personality traits for an ideal woman, but with this came more freedoms than

anywhere else in the ancient world.

Works Cited

Beard, Mary. SPQR: A History of Ancient Rome. New York: Liveright, 2015.

David, Jacques-Louis. “The Interventionof the Sabine Women.”1799. Daily Art Magazine. Musee du Louvre. http://www.dailyartmagazine.com/the-time-intervention-sabinewomen/.

“Inscriptions.” In Ancient Rome: An Anthology of Sources. Edited by Christopher Francese and R. Scott Smith. Indianapolis: Hackett, 2014.

Livy. The Early History of Rome. Translated by Aubrey De Sélincourt. London: Penguin Classics, 2002 “Marble plaque showing parturition scene.” c.400BCE-300CE. Brought to Life. Science Museum London. http://broughttolife.sciencemuseum.org.uk/broughttolife/objects/display?id=92258.

Mazzanti, Ludovico. “The Death of Lucretia.” c.1730. Britannica. Los Angeles County Museum of Art. https://www.britannica.com/topic/Lucretia-ancient-Roman-heroine.

Poussin, Nicolas. “The Rape of the Sabine Women.” Sartle. Louvre Museum. https://www.sartle.com/artwork/the-rape-of-the-sabine-women-nicolas-poussin.

Suetonius. The Twelve Caesars. Translated by Robert Graves. London: Penguin Classics, 2007.