A catalogue record for this book is available from the National Library of Nigeria. ISBN: 978-978-52058-9-3 ŠThe Staying Alive Foundation Inc. All rights reserved No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in a retrieval system, in any form or by any means, without permission in writing from the copyright holder.
story illustrations letters colors edits
ADENIJI Adeniran OLUSANYA Babajide OBIAKOR Ikechukwu Quatermax Media OYEGUN-MASADE Yona
creative team
Designed and printed by: Kachifo Limited 253 Herbert Macaulay Way, Yaba Lagos, Nigeria www.kachifo.com
Lagos...
It’s beautiful...
What did I do to deserve this?
Baby, I can’t. I have an assignment to hand in.
Well, aren’t you taking the day off to spend with your gorgeous husband?
Let’s do something special later instead. Will be home by 4pm.
Later, on Campus.... Awww....Nii spoils you.
Hey! He’s the lucky one.
Okay...what do you want?
Yeah, you’re so lucky.
Mally... my best friend in all the world, the smartest, freshest girl on campus.
Mally... please now.
I need your help with an assigment. Have to submit by midnight.
Ah! Sophie, how do you expect me to write an essay from scratch by tonight. I promised Nii we’d spend time together.
Here’s my key. Go and chop a/c. My laptop is there....
Okay! But this is the last time.
just let the words flow. I’ll organize car hire to take you home. You know I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t desperate.
Baby. I have to stay a little longer than expected. Will make it up to you.
Thank you...my bestie.
Later that evening in Sophie’s dorm room. Done! Where is this girl...
Hey! Sophie... is this fair?
she’s going to get me in trouble with Nii if she..
You said you’ll be gone for only a couple of hours. I don’t have time to...
Man trouble.
Sophie... what’s wrong?
Nii will be seriously angry that I’m not home yet...
but I can’t leave Sophie like this... She needs me.
7 7 misse
d calls
You still haven’t given me a sensible reason for not picking up my calls earlier. Your last class was at 3:30, and you’re just getting home at 7:30?
At home, later that night...
INFO
What is Domestic Violence? Domestic violence is violence between people in a domestic relationship (whether married, unmarried and living together, dating or family members), including physical and sexual abuse, emotional, verbal and psychological abuse such as humiliation or insults, intimidation, harassment and controlling or abusive behavior. Did you know that domestic violence is against the law under Lagos State’s ‘Protection Against Domestic Violence’ law?
Sophie and I had some school work to take care of. I told you I would be late.
I don’t like Sophie. She’s a bad influence.
But you know she’s my best friend...we even used to be roommates.
Well, you live with me now.
Morning the next day, on campus....
You sure?
I’m really sorry about last night.
It’s okay...I’m fine now.
Let’s do something together tonight.
We can go to Ocean Basket. I know how much you like seafood.
Great! Be ready by seven. Malaika, I love you.
I would like that very much.
Later in Sophie’s dorm room...
I love you, Nii.
I can’t. Nii and I have special plans.
Hey Sophie... you feeling better?
Yes o! Abeg, I’m going to Badoo Tree Night Club. Escort me now.
Hmmph... ok o.
6:47pm at Home....
I can’t make it. I’m going somewhere with the boss.
Hey Baby, I was just getting ready. This could be a good career move for me.
Love you.
Oh...ok... that’s great. Try not to stay out too late.
Love you.
Hey Sophie....still going to Badoo tonight?
At Badoo, that night....
Nii..?
Hey...
We’re going home now! Bad belle.... Abeg let her have some fun.
Hey brother... Real men don’t treat women like that.
I’m not your brother.
Later at the house...
I’m sorry. you said you’d be out so...
So you thought you would go out with that Ashawo? Embarrass me in front of my boss?
Nii, I’m sorry.
You want to be my wife? The mother of my children?
INFO
Ye..yes.
Gather Proof! If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, collecting evidence is important to prove what happened: • Record the date and time of every occurrence • Take photos and/or videos soon after with your phone of any injuries or damage to furniture • If you report to the police or visit a doctor for treatment afterwards ask for a copy of the medical or police report • And remember to bring family and friends when you visit the police
Then start acting like it.
The next morning....
Later on Campus...
?
Thanks for abandoning me at the club last night. What’s your husband’s problem anyway?
I have to get to class.
Nii did this to you?! And don’t tell me you fell because I won’t believe it.
Mally...
Owwww....
INFO There’s No Excuse for Domestic Violence! Domestic violence is the fault of the abuser. Survivors of domestic violence don’t cause it to happen. What Sophie says is correct: Don’t blame survivors of domestic violence and help them stop blaming themselves.
Hold on! You’re pregnant?
I shouldn’t have been at the club last night. I embarrassed my husband in front of his boss. I was irresponsible...I can’t be a mother if....
No. But that’s what started the fight. Nii wants children. I told him we could after I graduate. Wh.. where are we going?
Babe...we are going to the pharmacy. It’s your body. You get pregnant when you’re ready. We are going to get some birth control pills.
INFO
There are many different forms of contraception. In Shuga, Malaika chooses to use the pill based on her friend Sophie’s suggestion. We would advise consulting with your doctor or a health clinic, so you can get a comprehensive understanding of the safe and effective contraceptive methods available to you. This will allow you to make more informed decisions about your sexual health and choose a contraceptive method that suits your lifestyle, budget and personal needs.
At the pharmacy...
Hey Malaika... you should see this.
Malaika, did you know that the Law protects YOU from domestic abuse and assault?
Please use as directed.
Thank you.
Look at this.
FOUR DAYS LATER…
Birth control pills! When did we decide when not to have a baby?
Babe… what’s wrong? Guess what I found? Hidden in the bathroom?
I can explain. I thought we should wait till I finish. I onlyhave....
Nii…Nii... please.
MORNING, TWO WEEKS LATER…
Sorry, I have to get to class.
Malaika! I know you can hear me. Open this door! I…I’m…just wait please.
INFO
What were you doing?
What is a Protective Order? If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, they can get help by applying for a protective order from a court. A court can order the abuser to stop committing domestic violence, prevent the abuser from entering the home of the person who is experiencing domestic violence (even if the abuser lives there) and order the abuser to make emergency payments to the person who is experiencing domestic violence to cover rent, food and other expenses.
Babes...you ok? Just checking on you.
What’s his name?
You need to stop gossiping with this Sophie girl. Why did you lock the door again?
It’s my period...it started today. I’m not pregnant. A barren gossip! Don’t know why I put up with you.
Now you’ve made me late for work.
ON CAMPUS, THE NEXT DAY…
Malaika, this is a first for you.
You’ve never been late with an assignment before.
Ma - I have a question. Yes?
INFO
Who can Apply for a Protective Order? Anyone who is experiencing domestic violence as well as anyone else who has an interest in their well-being, as long as the person experiencing domestic violence consents. Parents, relatives, counselors, doctors, nurses, social workers, teachers, police officers – all of these people can help by applying for a protective order. No one has to go through domestic violence alone! How do I defer a semester or school year? I have a family situation to take care of.
For a whole year?
Malaika, you are one of my brightest students. Tell me what’s going on. Maybe I can help.
It’s nothing serious Ma....I’m fine.
Afternoon...on campus. You’re pregnant! I thought you were on the pill. Nii made me stop taking them. What? But you told him you weren’t ready! You haven’t even finished your education. Being your husband doesn’t give him the right to control or belittle you. He... he forces himself on me but he’s my husband. I’m so confused...
don’t know what to do.
INFO
And he is still hitting you abi? Do you know that there are laws against assault to protect you?
There are even laws against domestic violence! You can press charges! You don’t need to suffer in silence!
Malaika! There is a word for that. It’s called Abuse. Husband or not, he can’t do that to you.
He beats you and forces himself on you and now you wan born pikin for am? Mally Haba!
What can Sophie do to Help? Friends and family play an important supportive role in encouraging their loved ones who are experiencing domestic violence to seek a protective order. They should also document domestic violence and give evidence as witnesses in court to help to obtain a protective order. He’s my husband Sophie. I love him.
It’s going to be alright Mally…after classes I will take you to this doctor in ‘Lere who will prescribe something to help you get rid of this problem.
The next day, Malaika is at home… Sophie, I keep throwing up… is that meant to happen?
Err…those herbs don’t come with side-effects warning. Drink lots of water. It’s going to be alright Mally. I’ll call you after class to check up on you.
Thank you Sophie
oohhh...
Malaika... Malaika!
Hey...
You had me so worried... the doctor said you almost miscarried.
You’re pregnant..we are going to have a baby.
Hello Malaika, Nii.
How are you feeling Malaika?
They are keeping her overnight as a precaution. aunty...
Hmmmm....I have a feeling that all is not well with these two.
She gets discharged tomorrow.
Next day....
Sorry I kept you waiting. How are you feeling?
F…f… fine
“That’s good”
See you in the morning, Malaika.
next day.
You only cook my favorite meal when you want something. So what do you want?
I just hoped we could talk about me finishing uni...
Wow! You’ve outdone yourself. Not too stressful I hope.
It..it was nothing.
I see...
By the way we need to celebrate...
Celebrate? Yes. Celebrate how our baby survived despite your attempts to kill it. The doctor told me what you did. What kind of sick mother does that? If you ever try anything like that again…
…Pass me the salt
Next day...Afternoon
I’m not scared of him. And you shouldn’t be either. You don’t have to live like this.
Malaika. Are you okay? You haven’t been coming to class.
Nii will be home soon. hello Sophie... haven’t seen much of you lately. Your aristos been keeping you occupied?
Isn’t that what you told me, Malaika. Sophie is always busy sleeping with men for money, right?
What?
Oh... congratulations.
Please don’t come again.
Morning...next day.
I asked for an omelette
We were out of cooking oil. So I...
Can’t you do anything right?
I’ll stock up
You think? Look...I’ll drop you off at the stores.
You can go shopping. OK?
Mally! Mally!
At the Mall, Malaika is done with the shopping...
I’m sorry...I have to go. Nii’s waiting.
I’m looking for someone. Former campus queen, 4.2 average, fine, smart, sweet. Where is she?
She’s better than all this.
What do you know about anything? Your life is a complete mess.
Mally? Me?
You’re running away from me?
Outside... You really took your time. I’m sorry. I lost track. What did you say?
Ah! You forgot the cooking oil. Honestly, you can be stupid sometimes.
No...
I’m not stupid. I’m fine and smart and...and sweet.
INFO
How do You get a Protective Order? You can apply on your own behalf or someone can apply for you – you don’t need a lawyer! An application for a protective order is made before a magistrate or state high court. An application can be heard immediately if delay would cause undue hardship (like risk the safety of someone experiencing domestic violence). There are people who can help you prepare a protective order application – check out the back cover for places where you can find help.
Get in the car. I’ll get the cooking oil.
I can’t take this anymore...
need to get away...
aunty... I’ve had enough. I won’t be abused any more
It’s ok Malaika. You’re safe now.
INFO
Is Someone You Know Being Abused? With your support, they can take steps to end the abuse and plan for their safety. You should support them by encouraging them to seek medical treatment, report the abuse to the police or get a protective order. You should also help them by accompanying them to the police, court or hospital.
Resources SUPPORT AND COUNSELING Project Alert Tel: +081 8 009 1072 Email: info@projectalertnig.org cobi.asekun@projectalertnig.org http://www.projectalertnig.org/ about.html Project Alert 21, Akinsanya Street Off Isheri Road, Taiwo Bus Stop (Behind FRSC) Ojodu – Berger P.O. Box 15456, Ikeja Lagos, Nigeria
Women’s Empowerment and Legal Aid Initiative (WELA)
Action Health Inc. (AHI)
Tel: +08120799122
Email: info@actionhealthinc.org
Email: kennyjustice444@yahoo. com
http://www.actionhealthinc.org/
http://welaonline.org/
Action Health, Inc. 17 Lawal Street, Off Oweh St Fadeyi, Lagos
WELA 25, Adekunle Fajuyi Way GRA Ikeja, Lagos
Tel: +234 1 774 3745
GENERAL Nigeria Police
Hospitals
The Mirabel Centre
Tel: 199
Lists of hospitals, health clinics and medical centres available online at
Tel: +0701 349 1769 +0811 555 4877 +0815 577 0000 +0803 123 0236 (toll free)
http://www.npf.gov.ng/
Global GSM Emergency Number Tel: 122
http://www.hospitalsworldwide. com/countries/nigeria
http://pjnigeria.org/category/ sexual-assault-centre/ The Mirabel Centre Lagos State Teaching Hospital Ikeja, Lagos