“Why should I stick my neck out on the line when I’m only going to get rejected? I’ll just go home and try again a different day.” “I’m not prepared enough...I’ll buy a [training program, self-help guide, dating course] and study harder before trying.”
Tell yourself to stop making excuses to avoid an uncomfortable situation, and step outside of your comfort zone. You’re working against yourself if you are creating constant excuses and roadblocks. The best recommendation is to just do it. By having excuses and self-defeating internal dialogue running through your head as you are trying to meet a woman, you are hurting your chances for success. How do you counteract your negative thoughts and improve your selfesteem and confidence? You will need to re-invent your internal thoughts so that they are positive and constructive.
Positive Reconstruction of Negative Self-Talk How do you re-think what you are telling yourself? The following is a closer look at common statements, and what they really mean. 1. “She’s too attractive for me. She’s out of my league.” It is up to her to decide if someone is a suitable mate. Don’t assume anything! Everyone has seen a stunning woman on the arm of an average man. That guy didn’t let his internal thoughts get in the way. If you are saying this to yourself, you have a poor self image about the way you look. If you listen to this type of talk, you will start to act unattractive. The woman you are trying to get a date with will sense that you think lowly of yourself. Try replacing this thought with a new, more positive view:
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