CNSTC: April 19, 2023

Art in the open

Around Town

The 20th annual Augusta Plein Air Festival gives artists the opportunity to create their art outdoors in Missouri Wine Country

By Brett Auten

Watching art spring forth has been part of the Augusta Plein Air Festival for 20 incarnations.

Set to begin Thursday and run until April 29, it is an opportune chance to escape to Missouri Wine Country where you will watch art being created and also have the chance to purchase the art straight from the easel.

The festival (which showcases artists of all levels) provides artists with the opportunity to expand their markets, enhance their skills and receive recognition for their art. Whether you are a serious buyer or

someone who just appreciates a swath of colors or a naturalistic scene, it’s unique in that you get to know the artists all while surrounded in the beauty of spring in Missouri.

“They are all so open to people speaking to them,” Lynn Buchheit, of the festival, said.

Plein Air, meaning “in the open air,” is simply a form of art created outdoors. The artist listens to their senses, paying particular attention to the light. Focusing on the scenery around them, they listen to the sounds, take in the atmosphere, and feel the climate, which inspires them to express their vision on canvas.

The root of Plein Air goes back to 19th century Europe. At this time, the impressionists deviated from the rules of art and headed outdoors to paint peasant life. The expansion of the railroad allowed artists to paint unchartered territory with an endless number of beautiful landscapes to be explored. By the mid-19th century, the realists began an artistic revolution, paying close attention to the light in nature. They began painting pictures by trusting their eyes and using the colors they saw the light creating.

Today, in keeping with the cultural heri-

Features

Recipe, Movie & Sudoku. Pg. F-1

CLA SSIFIEDS AND HOME & GARDEN. Pg. F-2 /F-3

Moore On Life, Lifestyle & Crossword. Pg. F-4

St. Charles County Prosecuting Attorney announces retirement. Pg. 2

Summer hours at August A. Busch and Jay Henges Shooting Ranges. Pg. 4

Submitted photos

The public is invited to observe art unfolding before their eyes at the 20th annual Augusta Plein Air Festival will be held April 20-29.

Around Town

‘ART’ from cover

tage of Augusta, artists are invited to come and share their interpretation of the beautiful countryside and historical structures.

On April 29, the final judging and awards will be held in the Town Square from 11:30 a.m. – 5 p.m.., and the Whiskey Club Band will be providing live music. There will be a kid’s hand-on activity tent along with plenty of local food and beverages. That is also a great time to purchase the perfect piece of art.

“We love to invite artists into the area and then get a look at how they see our town,” Buchheit said. “You see their work and you’re like, ‘Hey, I know where that is.’

Some of the programs include, Breakfast with Alpacas on April 21 at 11 a.m. where artists paint out at Midwest Alpaca Farm, a family-owned farm in Defiance, beginning

at 6:30 a.m. with judging at 11 a.m. The public is invited to view the art as it is being created.

Later on, Friday, an Evening at Balducci Vineyards begins at 4 p.m. There will be paint outs at Augusta Shores, Lake Sherwood, Daniel Boone and many others. A workshop – Options and Exploration in Plein Air – John Lasater, and the artist’s Choice Voting and People’s Choice Voting and Theme Paint Judging will be held April 28 from 8 a.m. - 6 p.m.

“The two-hour quick paint is always fun to see what comes out,” Buchheit suggested. For more information, visit www.augustapleinair.com.

St. Charles County Prosecuting Attorney

Tim Lohmar announced his decision to retire from public office on March 30.

“For the past 12 years, I have had the privilege of serving the citizens of St. Charles County, first as an elected judge, and for the last 10 years as the elected prosecuting attorney. I am proud of what we have accomplished during this tenure in protecting the St. Charles County community and consider it to be one of the greatest honors of my life,” Lohmar said. “This community has honorable police officers, dedicated prosecutors and staff, and, perhaps most importantly, citizens, who support the law enforcement community.”

St. Charles County Executive Steve Ehlmann has begun the process of filling the vacancy of the office of prosecuting attorney.

“When there is a vacancy in the office of prosecuting attorney, the county charter charges me with appointing someone to fill that vacancy,” Ehlmann says. “My appointment is subject to confirmation by the county council.”

Lohmar addressed his future plans after moving on from the office of prosecuting attorney.

“I am excited to say that I will be entering the private practice of law. St. Charles County will always be my home, and I look forward to continuing to be a part of serving this community in different ways.”

The charter requires that the person appointed shall be a member of the same political party as the previous occupant. Once appointed, the person holds office until Jan. 1, 2024, following the next general election at which a successor shall be elected for the unexpired term. The attorney chosen to serve as prosecutor will need to stand for election for the remainder of the term at the August 2024 primary and, if successful there, at the November 2024 general election.

Lohmar explained the timing of his announcement as wanting to spend more time with his family.

“Inevitably, there will be questions about my decision and about its timing mid-term. Let me answer them this way: this is not a sudden decision nor an easy one. The job of prosecuting attorney is rewarding, challenging and at times grueling. My family and I came to the conclusion several months ago that it was time for me to consider other professional opportunities as I realized I could no longer give this job the energy and attention it requires and still have time for my family and for my own health and well-being,” Lohmar said. “I did not want to shortchange my colleagues, my family, the people of St. Charles, or myself. Because of that, we knew it was time to begin a new chapter.”

To fulfill the charter, Ehlmann will set up interviews of potential candidates. Ehl-

mann will then submit his appointment to the county council for confirmation. An acting prosecutor will be appointed by Ehlmann until the position is filled.

To serve as prosecuting attorney, applicants must meet the following qualifications as outlined in the county charter:

• Must be a registered voter in St. Charles County who has resided in St. Charles County for a period of not less than two years immediately prior to the general election.

• Does not at the time of assuming office, and during the term in office, hold any other remunerative office with the United States, the State of Missouri, St. Charles County, or any political subdivision of the State. This does not apply to membership in the military forces of the United States, the State militia, or notaries public.

• Be currently and for at least five years have been duly licensed to practice law in the State of Missouri.

Lohmar expressed his gratitude to the citizens of St. Charles County as he moves on to the next chapter of his life.

“I will be forever humbled and grateful to have been given the responsibility and opportunity by voters to do my part to ensure that St. Charles County is truly one of the very best places to live and raise a family,” Lohmar said. “To all who have played a role along the way, I thank them from my heart.”

Submitted photo

Over 100 artists from next week’s Augusta Plein Air Festival will be scattered about the small towns of Defiance, New Melle, and Augusta, capturing and recreating wine country, the Missouri River bluff, farmlands, the Katy Trail and historic structures.

St. Charles County Prosecuting Attorney announces retirement from public office

Ameren Missouri proposes new ways for customers to save money

Ameren Missouri filed a plan with the Missouri Public Service Commission (PSC) to provide 25 programs with $200 million in total rebates and incentives for residential and business customers over the next three years. The proposal also includes $67 million in expanded programs for income-eligible customers and social service agencies.

The proposed group of programs, under the Missouri Energy Efficiency Investment Act, focus on:

• Helping customers use energy more efficiently and save money.

• Educating customers on how to have more control over their energy use.

• Making it easier for customers to participate by providing something for everyone.

• Expanding programs to provide energy savings for customers most in need and increasing program participation in underserved communities.

If approved by the PSC, the programs will run from 2024 to 2026.

“Helping customers use less energy not only saves them money but it also benefits the environment,” said Mark Birk, chairman and president of Ameren Missouri, a subsidiary of Ameren Corporation (NYSE: AEE). “With just a 15% reduction in energy use through energy efficiency programs, customers can save the equivalent of about two monthly bills. Ameren’s robust energy efficiency programs also keep overall emissions lower by reducing the demand for energy.”

Ameren Missouri’s plan invests $122 million annually in energy efficiency and demand response over the next three years. As a result, the proposal intends to save over 800,000 megawatt-hours of electricity, which is equal to the annual energy consumption of 66,500 average-sized Missouri homes. It also supports Ameren’s commitment to clean by being an integral part of reduc-

ing Ameren Missouri’s emissions and the transformational changes toward net-zero carbon emissions.

“This proposed three-year investment is a testament to the commitment Ameren Missouri has made to help our customers use energy more efficiently to save money and meet future needs,” said Tara Oglesby, vice president of economic, community and business development at Ameren Missouri. “We also want to make certain these cost-saving programs are accessible for everyone, so the programs are expanded to ensure funds for income-eligible customers.”

Ameren Missouri’s proposal includes income-eligible initiatives such as a multifamily program, a single-family program and a business social services program. The multifamily program will include incentives for Building Operator Certification training to assist building managers in maintaining their building’s energy efficiency upgrades. The single-family program will provide

energy assessments and install a comprehensive package of whole-house energy saving measures at low or no cost to customers. Finally, the business social services program will deliver, install and assist with paperwork for low- or no-cost energy efficiency measures in facilities that serve income-eligible individuals.

The company’s proposal also includes a demand response program, which would incentivize participants with smart thermostats to reduce energy usage during times of peak consumption on the Ameren Missouri system. The goal is to enroll more than 80,000 customers in the program by the end of 2026.

Ameren Missouri has requested a decision from the PSC by the end of the third quarter. There is still time to participate in current energy efficiency opportunities offered through the company. Visit AmerenMissouri.com/EnergyEfficiency to learn more.

Lake Saint Louis Police Department partners with American Red Cross to host community blood drive

The Lake Saint Louis Police Department will host a community blood drive with the American Red Cross on April 26 from 1 to 6 p.m., at the Lake Saint Louis Civic Center at 200 Civic Center Drive.

“Lake Saint Louis Police Department is committed to strengthening our community and helping meet hospital and patient needs through blood donations,” said Officer Susie Ochs, Community Resource Officer. “This blood drive is our way of giving staff, colleagues and neighbors an opportunity to help save

lives.”

Blood is a perishable product that can only come from volunteer blood donors. With someone in the U.S. needing blood every two seconds, blood products must be constantly replenished, according to the Red Cross.

“We urge community members to donate blood and help ensure that patients in local hospitals have a supply of blood ready and waiting before an emergency occurs. There’s no better feeling than knowing that your blood donation may give someone a second chance at life.”

Qdoba Mexican Eats celebrate grand opening with ribbon cutting

Qdoba Mexican Eats opened its new location at 6005 Mid Rivers Mall Drive in Cottleville. To commemorate the opening, the company held a ribbon-cutting ceremony on March 22.

Members of the Cottleville Weldon-Spring Chamber of Commerce, Mayor Bob Ronkowski, and other community leaders were in attendance.

“This is the fourth company-operated drive-thru and the first in the St. Louis market. Our goal is to bring flavor to people’s lives. Come out and

visit us for a Free chip and queso when you sign up for Qdoba Rewards,” said general manager Michael Jones.

For more information or to make an appointment to donate, call 1-800-REDCROSS (1-800-733-2767) or sign up online at redcrossblood.org with sponsor code LSLPD. Completion of a RapidPass online health history questionnaire found at redcrossblood.org/rapidpass is encouraged to help speed up the donation process.

Presenting donors at this drive will be automatically entered for a chance to win a three-night trip for two to Sonoma County, California. Getaway includes flights, hotel, $1,000 gift card and a behind-the-scenes tour of the Charles M. Schulz Museum and Snoopy’s Home Ice, courtesy of Peanuts Worldwide.

Submitted photo

Nine Fort Zumwalt seniors named National Merit Finalists

Fort Zumwalt School District has nine 2023 National Merit Scholarship Finalists. These Fort Zumwalt seniors are among the top scorers on the Preliminary SAT/National Merit Scholarship Qualifying Test (PSAT/NMSQT) taken by more than 1 million high school juniors at more than 22,000 high schools across the nation.

They represent less than 1% of high school students and are among almost 8,000 seniors across the nation to share in roughly $35 million in scholarships.

Fort Zumwalt’s National Merit Finalists are:

East High: Andrew Hoette

North High: Alan Meyer and Hope Wheeler

South High: Sathvik Enturi, Hayden Reinhold, Varun Vasireddy and Rajyalakshmi Yarlagadda

West High: Ava Baker and Lakshita Senthil

Summer hours begin at August A. Busch and Jay Henges Shooting Ranges

Shooting enthusiasts can take advantage of the longer daylight hours at both Missouri Department of Conservation’s (MDC) staffed shooting ranges in the St. Louis region.

The August A. Busch and Jay Henges Shooting Ranges and Outdoor Education Centers began their summer hours of operation on April 1. Both ranges’ summer schedules include evening shooting opportunities during the week – Jay Henges Range is open until 7:30 p.m. on Wednesday evenings and Busch Range is open until 7:30 p.m. on Thursdays.

The summer hours of each range are as follows and will be effective through Aug. 31:

Busch Range

• Wednesday: 10 a.m.-4:30 p.m.

• Thursday: 1 p.m.-7:30 p.m.

• Friday-Sunday: 10:00 a.m.-4:30 p.m.

• Closed Monday-Tuesday for maintenance and special use Henges Range

• Wednesday: 1 p.m. to 7:30 p.m.

• Thursday through Sunday: 10:00 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.

• Closed Monday-Tuesday for maintenance and special use

Both shooting ranges offer shooting lanes for rifle and pistols up to 100 yards. Use fees are $4 per hour at both facilities and include paper targets and eye and ear protection if shooters don’t have their

own. Both shooting ranges feature trap fields, static archery ranges, and shotgun patterning boards. The Busch Range also offers skeet shooting. $4 covers a round of shotgun shooting and clay birds at either facility, or an hour at the patterning board.

The August A. Busch Shooting Range and Outdoor Education Center is located at 3550 Route D, approximately five miles west of Highway 94 in Defiance. The Jay Henges Shooting Range and Outdoor Education Center, is at 1100 Antire Road, just off I-44, exit 269 in Eureka.

Ava Baker Rajyalakshmi Yarlagadda

Varun Vasireddy Hayden Reinhold Sathvik Enturi

Hope Wheeler

Alan Meyer

Andrew Hoette

Submitted Photos

Lakshita Senthil

Submitted photo

August A. Busch and Jay Henges Shooting Ranges began summer operating hours on April 1. The new seasonal schedule includes evening shooting hours during the week at both ranges.

Take Notice .

The events listed in this section are the latest updates as of press time, please check with individual sites for the most up to date cancellations and reschedule info.

EVENTS

April 22 and 23: Choral Art Singers celebrating 50th Anniversary!

Choral Arts Singers announce our spring concert, “Let Heaven and Nature Spring” featuring folk song Bright Morning Stars, jazzy Blue Skies, and uplifting Song of Creation. Our group is celebrating over 50 years as a choir with performances Saturday April 22, 7pm, at Wentzville United Methodist Church, 725 Wall St, Wentzville, MO and Sunday April 23, 3pm, at Assumption Parish Chapel, 403 N Main St, O’Fallon, MO. Concerts are free, donations are appreciated. Visit our website, www. concertarts.org, and Facebook (Choral Arts Singers) for more concert details and to learn more about our choir.

April 29: Writers’ meeting

Saturday Writers April Meeting takes place from 11 a.m. - 1 p.m. at Spencer Road Library, Room 240. Writers encouraging writers. Special guest speaker George Sirois. For more information, visit www. saturdaywriters.org. $5 for visitors, free to members.

April 30: Bunco Bash

The KC Ladies Auxiliary, Council 7198, is sponsoring a Bunco Bash fundraiser. Doors open at 1 p.m., bar opens at 1:30 p.m., dice roll at 2 p.m. Cost is $25 per person and includes snacks, appetizers, desserts, soda and tea plus two complimentary adult drink tickets. Donations made to Mary Queen of Angels and Our Lady’s Inn. To reserve a seat or for more information, email ladiesauxbunco@gmail. com.

May 24: Theater auditions

Registration is open now for auditions for St. John UCC summer show for Performing Arts Camp, “Matilda the Musical Jr!” for grades sixthrough-12. Call Anna DiVesta at 636-946-0961 or visit stjohnucc.org/PAC-audition.

May 31: Book launch and signing event

Saturday Writers presents a book launch and signing event for “Anthology #16 A World of Writing,” the group’ sixteenth anthology, filled with award-winning prose and poetry, which will take place at Spencer Branch Library Room L (Room 240) from 6 – 8 p.m. There will be free admission, books available for purchase, refreshments, panel discussion by contributors and door prizes.

ONGOING EVENTS

Mondays: Optimist Club meetings

The Wentzville/Lake St. Louis Optimist Club meets on the second and fourth Monday of each month at 6:30 p.m. at

Spotlight on O’Fallon Plaza: GRACE’S

MERRY-GO-ROUND

Weare the premier consignment shop in the St. Louis area.

We are a full family consignment shop, meaning we accept gently used women’s, children’s, young men’s, accessories, household miscellaneous, toys, furniture, holiday clothing and decor. We have new items being dropped off every minute of every day so our inventory is ever changing. We hope to provide customers and consignors alike with the best possible consignment experience.

We welcome you to visit us at: GRACE’S MERRY-GO-ROUND

130 O’Fallon Plaza, O’Fallon, MO (636)281-4555

www.gracesmerrygoround.com

the Wentzville IHOP, 10 Layla Lane, Wentzville, MO.. For more information contact Ed Jurotich at 314-560-1868.

Mondays: Alcoholics Anonymous

If you want to drink, that’s your business. If you want to stop,

SUDOKU answers from page F-1

we can help. Call Alcoholics Anonymous at 636-970-0013.

CROSSWORD answers from page F-4

Sports you see with Gary B . . .

Lindenwood picks up championship trophies in Florida

Lindenwood University’s Cheerleading captured the Division II Intermediate Small Coed title and the Division II Advanced Large Coed title at the NCA/NDA Collegiate Cheer and Dance Team Championships April 8 at the Bandshell and Ocean Center in Daytona Beach, Florida.

The Lions also took third in the Intermediate All-Girl Division II competition, finished fourth in Advanced Small Coed Division II, and took fifth in Group Stunt. At the end of the week, Lindenwood competed in the Large Coed Grand Championship and finished third.

The busy week of competition began with preliminaries in Intermediate Small Coed. In a field of 18 squads, the Lions posted the top score at 24.1482 to sit in first place ahead of second place Arkansas – Fort Smith by 0.0649 points.

Lindenwood performed a near flawless routine in the finals and was one of only two teams with no deductions. With a final event score of 96.9815, the Lions finished over two points a head of Arkansas – Fort Smith (94.8542) to hoist the national championship trophy.

It was a similar theme in the Advanced Large Coed competition as Lindenwood led wire to wire, leading preliminaries with a score of 22.5301 compared to second place Columbus State University with 20.9884. The Lions again nailed a deduction free performance to earn a finals event score of 93.7524 and win their sec-

ond title of the week. Columbus State finished second with 87.8704.

Lindenwood was solid during the Intermediate AllGirl prelims, posting a score of 24.2361 to sit in third place in a field of 17 squads behind Dallas Baptist University (24.4908) in first. The Lions brought their A-game to the finals, but some deductions dashed any hopes of climbing up the standings. Lindenwood finished third with 97.0625 behind the eventual champion Dallas Baptist (98.3519).

The Lions looked poised to hoist a third championship trophy after prelims in Advance Small Coed. Lindenwood easily led the field with a score of 23.5324 ahead of McKendree (22.8912) in second but disaster struck in the finals with multiple deductions that knocked the Lions all the way down to fourth with an event score of 91.2184. Hawaii Pacific (92.7037) claimed the national title, Limestone University (91.9306) leaped all the way from fifth to second, and Shorter University (91.3125) rounded out the top three.

The Lions entered a four-person squad in the Group Stunt competition and finished fifth with a score of 91, edging out California Baptist in sixth. Western Kentucky (94.9444) won the event.

In the final event of the week, Lindenwood competed its winning squad in the Large Coed Grand Championship and finished third with an overall score of 93.6296. Weber State won with a mark of 98.0833.

The two national championships become the 12th and 13th in program history for cheerleading. The Lions won the Small Coed Open and Intermediate Small Coed Open titles in 2021, won Large Coed division crowns in 2022, 2019, 2018, 2017, and 2015, and captured the Small Coed Division II championship in 2022 and 2018, the Small Coed Division II in 2016, and Small Coed in 2011.

Recipe: Simple, sweet energy bites

Energy Bites

Servings: 20

Having enough energy and fuel to make it through a long day can be challenging. No matter if you’re a stay-at-home parent, corporate worker or small business owner, having a high energy level that lasts throughout the day is important for both you and those around you. Having enough energy helps you stay alert and attentive to what is going on around you, whether that’s cleaning up after your little ones or filing a report your boss asked for.

When it comes to snacking during the day, these delicious, mouth-watering Energy Bites can give you the boost you need. They are made with creamy peanut butter and honey to curb your sweet cravings but still provide plenty of texture with shredded coconut and raw oats.

INGREDIENTS:

1/2 cup creamy peanut butter

1/3 cup honey

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup raw oats

Movie:

By Steve Bryan

Born and raised in South St. Louis, Steve Bryan is now based in Anaheim, California, and has been allowed access to movie and television sets to see actors and directors at work. Though his writing has taken him far from St. Louis, Steve is, at heart, still the same wide-eyed kid who spent countless hours watching classic movies at neighborhood theaters.

1/2 cup sweetened shredded coconut

1/2 cup flaxseed meal

6 tablespoons mini chocolate chips

DIRECTIONS:

In medium mixing bowl, stir peanut butter, honey and vanilla extract until combined.

Add oats, coconut, flaxseed meal and chocolate chips. Mix until combined.

Shape into 1-inch balls. Store in airtight container in refrigerator until ready to serve.

FindmoresnackrecipesatCulinary.net.

During the summer of 1981, my friends and I were looking forward to “History of the World, Part 1,” the latest comedic outing from director Mel Brooks. When we arrived at the theater, tickets for that film were sold out. One friend suggested driving down the street to the Mark Twain Theater to see another new film, “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” With nothing to lose, we settled into our theater seats for nearly two hours of action and adventure. Steven Spielberg directed the film, which was based on a story by George Lucas and Philip Kaufman. Suffice it to say, we forgot all about Brooks’ film.

Preview audiences weren’t impressed with the film, but “Raiders” went on to become the highest-grossing film of 1981. It also has been considered one of the best films ever made. The 1984 sequel “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” attempted to capture the thrills of the original, but the violent tone was reportedly responsible for the creation of the “PG-13: Parents Strongly Cautioned” rating. However, teaming Harrison Ford with Sean Connery for 1989’s “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade” was a brilliant move.

After “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull,” however, it looked as if Dr. Henry Walton “Indiana” Jones, Jr. would hang up his whip and fedora for good, but he will return in “Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny.” Unlike previous films, it’s important to note that Spielberg and Lucas only served here as executive producers. Set in 1969, Indiana Jones discovered that the U.S government recruited former Nazis to help them beat the Soviet Union into space. In the film, Mads Mikkelsen (“Fantastic Beasts”) plays Jürgen Voller, one of the ex-Nazis with his own outer space agenda.

With her engaging “Hunger Games” trilogy, author Suzanne Collins introduced readers to Katniss Everdeen, a young woman who

lived in the nation of Panem in District 12 in what was once North America. After her father was killed in a mine explosion, Katniss became breadwinner for the family. Every year, the Capitol demanded each district produce a male and female tribute to participate in “The Hunger Games” where only a single tribute would survive. The tributes were chosen by lottery but, after her sister was selected, Katniss volunteered to take her place in the deadly games.

Katniss’ actions in the games displeased Coriolanus Snow, the President of Panem. In the upcoming prequel film, “The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes,” an 18-year-old Coriolanus has fallen from grace and must mentor the defiant female tribute from District 12, Lucy Gray Baird. In the film, Peter Dinklage (“Game of Thrones”) will play Casca Highbottom, a co-creator of the Hunger Games.

“Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny” will be released on June 30.

“The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes” will be released on November 17.

Fill in the blank squares in the grid, making sure that every row, column and 3-by-3 box includes all the digits 1 through 9.

SEE ANSWERS ON PG. 5

(Left) ‘Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny’ photo courtesy of Walt Disney Pictures. (Right) ‘The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes’ photo courtesy of Lionsgate.

Movie previews: ‘Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny,’ ‘The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes’

Photo courtesy

Moore on Life

I am not the most athletic of people. Oh sure, I can bench press a fork-full of pie to my mouth without pulling a muscle or do an impressive sit-up as the alarm clock buzzes then give it a good swat as I return to my slumber. I can also do crunches along with the best of them; my finest crunches result around breakfast time with crispy strips of bacon.

Fiscal fitness

But that is pretty much the extent of my physical exertion. However, there is one activity I take very seriously and am quite skillful at – shopping: extreme shopping to be exact.

Extreme shopping is not your standard breadand-butter-run-to-the-grocer’s type of action. No. This type of activity is a sport which requires stamina and talent.

Keen math skills are required. One must be able to search out the best bargains possible. I can quickly calculate a 50-percent-off clearance priced item then toss in a 30 percent store coupon along with a freebie early bird shopper discount; this all results in the store writing me a fat check for the merchandise selected.

One must also have strength and tenacity. If the last Captain Robo-Cat is on the shelf and another women has her outstretched hand reaching towards it; I must be able to duck, dive, grab, roll and run while yelling, “Snoozers are losers!” before the lady can mutter, “Hey, Jerk! What’s the big idea?!”

Nimble brainpower is imperative along with instant recall abilities. I must be able to remember each of my seven grandkids’ individual sizes, sexes, style preferences, favorite colors, special allergies, and least favorite cartoon characters.

By Cindy Moore

I once made the tragic mistake of buying my granddaughter Ninja Turtle underpants for her birthday. She became so traumatized she wore the same pair of Princess Sugar Sparkles underwear for the next month.

An extreme shopper must also be able to sift through seven aisles of clearance racks to locate the missing bottoms to the last pair of Spider-Man pajama’s, size 4T, which are needed to reward a grandson for doing his first pootie in the potty. I then must be able to whip out my cellphone coupon without the internet shutting down as I approach the checkout counter.

Afterwards, I will lift two bulging bags of goodies affixed to each arm thus further sculpting my biceps, while at the same increasing the bulk of my wallet by saving $96.78. I will receive a wad of Kohl’s Cash ensuring I return again for more cardiovascular, and all without breaking a sweat. That, my friends, is an intense workout!

Cindy Moore is the mother of three superlative kids, servant of two self-indulgent felines and wife to one nifty husband. Her ficticious occupation? Archeological Humorist: someone who unearths absurdity and hilarity in strange and unusual places including public restrooms, the lint filter, and church meetings. Most recently, she excavated a find in her neighbor’s bird feeder.

The opinions expressed in this column are Cindy Moore’s alone and do not reflect the opinion of the owners or staff of Community News.

CROSSWORD: CARTOON CHARACTERS

ACROSS

1. Unsuitable

6. Agency behind food labels, acr.

9. Pastoral sounds

13. More painful

14. "Maggie May" singer

15. Secret storage

16. Hajj destination

17. Inflated feeling

18. One in a quiver

19. *Scooby-Doo's best friend

21. *Stone Age Fred's best friend

23. Zip

24. Type of wave

25. "Mangia!"

28. Apple leftover

30. Unlike Pinocchio

35. Law school test acronym

37. Tiger's forte

39. Jack Black's Libre

40. For____ kitchen counter

41. Jewish folklore creature

43. Singer Whitman of "Secret Love" fame

44. Formerly known as dropsy

46. Spanish Surrealist

47. Stay out of its way!

48. Make a remake

50. Shawm

52. Yoda: "Do or do not. There is no ____"

53. Like hard times

55. Tube in old TV, acr.

57. *Jessica or Peter

60. *Anthropomorphic squirrel's last name

63. Small and elegant

64. Mozart's "L'____ del Cairo"

66. Like a whistle?

68. Optical illusion creation (2 words)

69. "Time," e.g., colloquially

70. Hint of color

71. "The Way We ___"

72. Farm pen

73. Skedaddle

DOWN

1. What hedonism and idealism have in common

2. Rejections

3. Flatfoot's lack

4. Pie option

5. Calamitous

6. One of the Eagles

7. *Pluto or Snoopy

8. Acrobat maker

9. Rural building

10. Homesteader's purchase, sing.

11. Nabisco's "Chips

12. To use a Singer

15. Dairy industry missing person-seeking prop

20. Nordic glühwein

22. Ooh and ____

24. Troublemaker

25. *Fudd's first name

26. Line to the audience

27. "It is silent," in sheet music

29. Living space

31. Don Johnson's Bridges

32. Plaudit and pomp

33. Bake an egg

34. *One of the Pickles

36. Like a broken horse

38. *Phineas' stepbrother

42. Be a parasite

45. Just about (2 words)

49. Hula necklace

51. Builds a tower, e.g.

54. Very small particles

56. Opposite of ecbatic

57. Ready for picking

58. A bit cracked

59. Not the life of the party

60. Same as cagey

61. Lotto variant

62. Palm starch

63. Gift topper

65. *Garfield or Tom

67. Butterfly catcher

‘Yeggs’ is a comic series about Robert and Bill, two rabbits who have opened their own egg franchise in the Midwest (St. Louis area). We follow their day to day lives, watching as they go about the hectic task of preparing for their one big day every year. Along the way they have adventures filled with fun, comic doings and pathos.

John Hanna Yeggs