Hogspore News: Senior citizen gallon size of Blu-Emu

By Clet Litter as told to Bob Simpson

I seen Old Man Grimely in Bickum’s Hardware. He said, “Clet, Bickum’s now carries Blue-Emu Topical Pain Reliever that eases my aches every day. Hardy Barkins showed me where it was, the paint department. I purchased the senior citizen gallon size can that I use. I come to realize why they keep it with the paint, cause I saw a paint roller to help slather it on in the mornings.”

Before the emus get ‘harvested’ for their oil and lean meat, they live a pleasant life in Australia. Emus are real curious in the first years. Sometimes the young ones do some time in theme parks. The most famous one is the Outback Emusement Park.

The last Pharaoh to rule Egypt wasn’t Egyptian. He was a mean-tempered Viking, specially if he didn’t get his way. He was Thor, son of Loother. King Thor

Loother’s people, the Pharacites, hated him. When he became Pharaoh, he took the name Nuttin-In-Commin.

Larry’s Funeral Home and Assisted Living Facility added a hospice. The building is behind the Assisted Living Facility on a hillside that slopes to the cemetery. The hospice opened this week. There was some changes made after the residents’ loved ones saw the place. Larry removed the sign from the entrance that said, “Roll On In” and the exit saying, “Roll On Down To Your Last Stop.” He also took down the warning in the family visiting area,“Do Not Feed the Residents.”

* (March 29, 2023) This is the last issue of the Hogspore News: First Place Humor Column Winner, 2008 National Society of Newspaper Columnists; July 2007 to March 2023. It’s been fun.

Bobsimpson2007@aol.com

“The Women of Country Music,” featuring singer Lana Gail, Ouachita Little Theatre, 610 Mena St., Mar. 31 - Apr. 1, 7:30 p.m. and Sunday, Apr. 2, 2:30 p.m. Tickets: Adults - $15, Students -$10. Buy in advance at box office or online at OLTMena.org. Tickets also available at the door day of show, but reservations recommended.

Keith Wood will perform, accompanied by Ernest Whitmore, in a concert at First United Methodist Church, 501 Ninth St., 4 p.m., Apr. 2, Palm Sunday. The concert is free to the public.

Applications for lifeguard positions at McMillan Pool may be picked up at City Hall, 520 Mena Street, between the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 4:30 p.m.

2800 Craftsy meets every Tuesday at 10 a.m., 2800 Jerry Lee Dr., Mena. Free to all who are interested in crafting. (501) 617-7261. Visit 2800 Craftsy on Facebookgroups.

Narcotics Anonymous meet at 5 p.m. and 7 p.m. on Monday, noon - 1 p.m. on Wednesday, 7 p.m. on Thursday, 7 p.m. on Friday, and 6 p.m. on Saturday at the old bus barn at the Crossing Church. For information call Erica at (479) 234-5289 or Candice at (501) 356-8300.

The Polk County Housing Authority has Rental Vouchers available. They are also in need of Applicants and Landlords. Contact them at 509 S. Morrow, Mena, (479) 394-1565 or polkarhousing.com

First Presbyterian Church will be presenting a study, “The Evolution of the Bible”, in its Adult Sunday School Class on Sunday mornings beginning at 9:45. The class will be conducted by Earl Harrell. Anyone with an interest in this study is invited to attend. Classes will be at the church in the parlor, 904 Church Ave., Mena.

Around Town

Cakewalk & food sale for the Choctaw Nation Community at the Smithville Nation Senior Center, Hwy. 259 in Smithville, 4 p.m., Saturday, Apr. 1. There will be chili dogs, hot dogs, Frito pies and nachos. Fundraiser proceeds go to Smithville Nation Senior Citizens trips. For more information call Ruthie Bohannon (580) 306-8628.

Disabled American Veterans and Auxiliary of Polk County will be holding their monthly meeting on Thursday, Apr. 6, at Veterans Park in Acorn. Potluck will begin at 6 p.m. with meetings to follow.

GriefShare continues to meet every Thursday from 10 a.m.-noon at First Presbyterian Church Mena for anyone in the community who is grieving the loss of a loved one.

The Hatfield Branch Library is open every Tuesday and Friday from noon - 4 p.m. The library is located at 121 Cemetery Rd. (old Agri building) in Hatfield.

The Cove Branch Library is open Monday and Thursday from noon - 5 p.m. The Library is located next to Cove Town Hall at 5568 Hwy. 71 S.

The Mena/Polk County Senior Center will have The Gator and Friends band performing in Mena every Thursday, 10:30 - 11:30 a.m.

The Center has an exercise class on Mondays and Thursdays, 9:30 - 10:30 a.m. Contact Trena Looney with questions, (479) 394-5459.

The Cossatot Senior Center in Wickes has meals and activities for seniors. If you need to make delivery arrangements or changes call (870) 385-2373.

Hatfield First Baptist Church “Shepherd’s Closet” Open Wednesdays, 10 a.m. - noon. Large selection of good, used clothing & a limited supply of non-perishable food items. Free to anyone in need.

Alcoholics Anonymous meet at The Crossing Church, 3 p.m., Sundays; at 5 p.m., Tuesdays; and at 8 p.m. Saturdays at the old bus barn. For information call (479) 234-8366 or (479) 216-3786.

The Food Pantry at the Mena Seventh Day Adventist Church is open every first and third Monday of each month, 4 - 6 p.m., located at Fair Grounds Road. For more information, call (479) 437-4018.

American Legion meets every 2nd Tuesday at the Legion Hall in Acorn. Potluck at 6 p.m., meeting follows. Come play Bingo, Saturdays and Mondays, starts at 6 p.m., doors open at 4 p.m.

Reynolds Gardner Community Men’s Breakfast every Tuesday, First United Methodist Church, Mena, 8 a.m. (full breakfast for small donation). All men from the community are invited to attend.

Alcoholics Anonymous meet at 7 p.m. Fridays at the First United Methodist Church, Ninth Street and Port Arthur. Discussion/Book Study for information call (479) 243-0297.

Bluegrass Jam Session is open to musicians and fans alike. Bring your instruments for an unplugged session to the Daisy Room (behind Janssen’s Avenue Florist & Gifts) the first and third Thursdays of each month, starting at 6:30 p.m. Free event. Some snacks are provided.

It’s easy to have your event listed in Around Town, which will be read on radio stations KENA and KQOR daily. Simply send your Around Town announcement to news@mypulsenews.com or call (479) 243-9600 and let us know about your event! To have it in the Polk County Pulse newspaper, we need to know by FIVE on FRIDAY. We look forward to continuing to serve the community!

Oklahoma says ‘no’ to recreational marijuana

By Patrick Massey

Oklahoma voters overwhelmingly rejected an initiative on Tuesday, March 7, that sought to legalize recreational marijuana as a follow up to the state’s medical marijuana program passed by double-digits in 2018.

Tuesday’s referendum on recreational marijuana ended in defeat with a margin of more than 20 points. Supporters of the effort hoped it would pass in part to reduce what they call a detrimental surplus in Oklahoma’s medical marijuana stockpile – and the reduction in marijuana prices caused by that surplus.

The measure would have legalized the possession of up to one ounce of marijuana as well as the cultivation of as many as six marijuana plants. If passed it would have also included a 15% sales tax for all recreational marijuana sales in Oklahoma.

Opponents of the measure pointed to the “wild west” nature of Oklahoma’s medical marijuana rollout in recent years. They have suggested that loose regulations – the most relaxed of any other medical marijuana state – and entrepreneurial activity has encouraged organized crime while also reducing community cohesion. Reporting by Politico suggests there are around 12,000 licensed medical marijuana businesses in Oklahoma. That’s more than three times the total in California, which boasts 10 times the population of Oklahoma.

Anyone traveling through Oklahoma’s McCurtain County will quickly discern that medical marijuana has been a booming industry for the state. One might even lose count of the dispensaries between Idabel and Hochatown alone.

According to the Oklahoma Medical Marijuana Authority, roughly 400,000 Oklahomans are enrolled in the state’s medical marijuana program - nearly one in 10 residents.

State officials were nearly unanimous in their opposition to Tuesday’s referendum. During a recent press conference, Gov. Kevin Stitt said the matter is better left to federal action.

“I believe the feds need to make a decision about marijuana,” he said. “There shouldn’t be a patchwork of states doing different things. We need to let the feds tell us if it’s legal or illegal. We shouldn’t let the states tell us that.”

Currently, recreational marijuana is legalized in 21 states as well as the District of Columbia. A total of 37 states have legalized medical marijuana.