NadiyaAminaA.M. Mohado Sheikh Nur 30-11-1995
September 2021
The Ignored One,Apoem
The Ignored One Everytime, a goodbye
There where I for once welcome a beautiful soul I seem to already have to say goodbye
With that gaze of mine
Why? I want Love
Can I Love?
No more a goodbye after a deserved hi! Even with a gaze
But a, I hope to see you soon!
With a gaze?
Have a good day and Having plans for the weekend?
May I?
Say hi?
One gaze?
Can I really amaze Men?
Without only stealing pleasure as plan? Or should I be quiet and forever alone
Being the silent?
Loud but silent? With my gaze?
Kept frozen in a photograph they seem to marry While the World its suffer I carry Somehow I wonder, who wants me right now? I have nothing
Nature I ask: Can someone look me in my eyes? I want to share a moment
Dont be shy
Men seem to start confident but end up Shy
Did they told you to say Goodbye?
Heroes only seem to be left to my imagination and hope While others hurt me to hurt them and hurtThe Earth until its left to the dirt
As I had to say goodbye
Before I met time
With you
That you stopped right there In my bedroom, but also In France Time
That left me Why?
When I saw you
To be real
I feel left alone to a crime to never shine You showed your face and there was I
You left a moment in my past
Can I make it go further on?
Who are you that I want to Share more of these moments with Moments I can lay down with On a bed I these days dont have As I left a hateful, destroyful past
Could it be my future feelings we fly on As we daydream maybe together
Who knows?
Your thoughts I keep pulling from that questioning gaze in the clouds I was staring at Were you amazed?
On what line were you on?
Right or left?
Stuck in crimescenes and theft? Could this be somehow a test?
I am more worth than just a start Or some words or clicks about that girl
Endless counts endless thrills
Untill I die left alone on crimescenes to appear on Sick minds and his fantasies?
I think he is different
I look like a whore but true men seem to adore Me
I distract and forget ones sick past
To climb further on future time I wish I could make you feel as much
Love, attraction and care
Apossible future I could share
But I always seem to be left alone somewhere As no one seems to dare To say hi
Were you scared?
I still care
It makes me scared
Only a single gaze we shared
Thoughts saved on a single gaze?
I imagine too much
Care too much
Hide it too much
As I died because of it too much
In the mind
Because I feel
Aface shown, there where I was blown away by: Why you?!
It left a mark in my shy being saying why that French guy?
I always end up saying goodbye With the gaze of mine
As I never have to talk They just walk, further on
Ignoring me
Could i be boring?
Do i look stupid? Or ugly?
Could I be maybe just too free?
On hate, forever I wait, To erase hateful gazes from my lovable memories How to fill in darkness, a lonely search for some love and awareness
To love more and hate less
As I barely hate I must confess I confess that I was lost
I still am lost
In Paris Gare du Nor Lost
Looking for a small room to be alone with things hanging on my line in my cloud
I was still alive and so proud Daydreams somewhere to be found on terabyte and gigabyte Did you went on mine? Got something to hide?
Like to intertwine as you have stopped my time? Why not just say hi? In real daily life? These things I question myself and feel as stupid as I am these days
Le stupide
Communism kept me stuck in my hopeless dreams trying to copy and steal what should be only meant for the real To for once mean something to the world
To make and share true love
Art and love
I feel no love as I feel unsafe How to make, create, while feeling lost these days? I only imagine of how it could feel
The silent should win from the loud
In my current daydream i came, silent but loud With someone i wish to talk to on my count
Time
You kept it right there
Dimensions I daydream about With you
Did you come as loud? But only for me to hear? What if you would come near? Would it let insanity disappear? It kept me stuck on our time
But they keep walking further on
Men who just seem to pretend in the end
And say goodbye
With empty gazes
Money that amazes
Those lost gazes
Or gazes filled with others pain and shame turned into empty faces
Too late to just stay and say hey
Brainwashed to be passed
By my time
I even say goodbye
With the gaze of mine
To those who only seem to steal away treasures of my time
The silent talks for me
The future decides for me
The patient one cares for me
The lovable one stays with me And will wait
Can we erase together a past it's hateful gaze? And make love? Share love? Become love?,
Who is he
And who am I to him?
I keep questioning
The Ignored One Stuck here in Düsseldorf HBF
With 2 procent phonebattery left
NadiyaAminaAwei(y)s Mohamed Mohado Sheikh Nur
30-11-1995
03-09-2021
10:33PM
No phonenetwork. I feel embarrased and alone
I wish i could have friends At least Ajob or getting shelter seems impossible. I asked strangers for a place to stay in the beginning I slept on benches but felt strong Shelters and hotels
I miss a cosy warm place for my own or ..? I feel weak
Used and weak
I miss my parents and family But they are stuck with insanity and want me to be free Every hope is leaning on me Why?
Its heavy I barely know I just go And follow Love? ....
Love to be there for once for my own I dont want to share Someone who cares Do you dare? I always wait For someone who Dares to Wants to Be with me to Love
What takes it to love? No illusion No confusion Only love .