My daughters are like my left and right brain

Words HELEN JOY

It’s a true blessing to be gifted with two beautiful daughters, both now grown into beautiful women and so different from each other. I feel blessed because we have an honest and beautiful connection.

Sadly, the connection I had with my own mother just didn’t exist. I grew up in a poor and abusive family with an older sister and three younger brothers. My mother, who married three times, seemed to have nervous breakdown after nervous breakdown. It felt as if she didn’t have enough love for all of us.

Growing up with violence makes you think twice about having a big family yourself. So, I imagined I would only ever have one child. Funny how life takes you where you least expect it.

My first daughter, Emmagen, was a dream baby, and I never had to worry about her. She was always happy, content and easy to please. I remember my friends saying, “You wait until she turns two, then you’ll know about it”. Know what? She was just lovely. Even to this day, I never worry about her. She’s married to a great guy, they’ve bought a house, and they both have great jobs.

But Louise was coming into this world no matter what I thought I wanted. I am so grateful she did, because she teaches me so much. She is my butterfly. She created the balance I didn’t know I needed to find.

Louise is so different to her older sister. She has been one challenge after another. At the age of 17 months, Louise drowned in our pool in Cairns. Fortunately, I had recently done a first aid course and was able to save her life.

The guilt I felt for leaving the gate open was life-shattering, and painting seemed the only thing that helped ease the pain. Each painting represented one of the ‘Kids Alive – Do The Five’ scenarios. I joined the Kids Alive committee, and my paintings were used in their promotional material. We handed out pool safety information packs at shopping centres throughout Cairns to thousands of people.

I’m sure I’m not alone in having two daughters (or even sons) that are like chalk and cheese. Funnily, I see a lot of me in each of my daughters: one the corporate, the other the hippy. I could even describe them as my left and right brain. Emmagen is more the left analytical, logical and practical girl, while Louise is more right-brained, creative, intuitive and spiritual.

Helen recently published her first book, Coffee Stains for Balanced Brains, which is based on lesson eight of her empowering training course Right Brain Genius. To learn more, visit: www.rightbraingenius.com.au