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WALKING WITH JESUS written by: Chuck-JOHNEL artwork by: Roger Augustin
I pray and hope that these little reports do not give you the impression that I'm some kind of "special" person to GOD. My unique intimacy with JESUS is more the result of being kept out of the church for the formative years (I 968-1974) when it was just JESUS and me and there was no one around to tell me this was not possible or to be afraid of deception or to begin questioning the Lord as if I knew more than He did. The relationship I grew into with JESUS was pretty basic, I was touched deeply by His Love and Kindness and that worked a change in me over the months and years whereby this intimacy became "normal" and not all that unusual. It was evident to
me that anyone, and I mean "anyone," could have the same kind of relationship with the LORD JESUS CHRIST as I did, in that I was not special; rather I was afforded the opportunity and time to grow into that relationship without the hindrances that every other brother and sister in Christ had. Because I was unfettered I found myself in this wonderful reality of GOD'S Holy Presence surrounded by His Love, Acceptance and Compassion as was taught by Him and by no man.
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What I share here is out of my joy and excitement of having walked with JESUS to the ends of encouraging each and everyone of you to break away those fetters men sling on us; and to walk freely `In The Spirit' with JESUS as your Lord, Savior, Teacher and Best Friend.
SITTING IN JESUS' LAP In the early years (1971-1975), while I was a bachelor, there was the opportunity to spend 3 to 6 hours a day in prayer and abiding in Christ. These were the teaching years where JESUS brought me to His garden spot in Heaven, where I sat at His feet as He taught me. While I retained some of what He taught me. much of it was "imparted to my spirit." Those hours of "impartation" are best described as being a deep, restful and serene quiet. Did I ever fall asleep? Actually, no! This sweet quiet in Christ was also lively, uplifting and while quiet it had the dimension of a crescendo of a massive symphonic presentation. I was deeply stirred while being gently soothed. There is no human experience to parallel it. JESUS always sat on this rock in His garden place and I sat like an eager student at His feet, but one day I called me to come closer and as I rose and came to His side, He swept me up and placed me on His lap. I was both surprised and awed at once. There are no words to rightly define the experience but one day many years later I had a peek into the Lord's side. My son Stefan was maybe four or five years old, bright-eyed and happy, and now and then I'd pick him up unexpectedly and put him on my lap. His expression was a mixture of joy, excitement and awe wrapped in an expression of contentment and happiness. Sitting on JESUS lap I definitely felt like a child, like my sun Stefan did, only I was a full grown man experiencing the exquisite joyful delight of a child. Did I feel safe? No, because in Heaven there is no such think as `unsafe', rather I was drawn by His sweet and gentle Love. JESUS' Love is pure and while human-earthly love can be stirring, warm and sweet it cannot compare to the Love of Christ which is a fire, a cleansing fire and the power of GOD.
KNOCKING JESUS DOWN! It was probably in the year 1984 while I traveled across North America extending the
Seal of the Living God to His people that I had this experience. From the time JESUS sent rzie out to minister His Word to America (1974) the daily opportunity to spend
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hours with JESUS in Heaven diminished as the demands of the ministry consumed my day. It came to a point for many years that I worked upwards of 19 hours a day and now and then more. This contributed to an illness that has dogged me for years (diabetes) - it is stress and lack of sleep that had more to do with my contracting diabetes (1994) than sugar or diet. JESUS had prepared and equipped me for this grinding schedule and I learned to take ti me with the Lord, in prayer and abiding, as I drove across this nation and Canada. While JESUS' Angel was always with me (I saw him day by day) I missed the depth
of the intimacy I enjoyed with JESUS in the early years. All those years with JESUS in Heaven had grounded me in Christ so when He sent me out to do His Will and to warn His people it was understood that the extent of our relationship would change as I engaged the work He set before me. I would always KNOW that He was by my side, but I would not necessarily see Him or speak to Him as in the early years. Being on the road alone, months at a time, facing hostility from brethren who rejected JESUS' Word and verbally attacked me personally was very difficult to bear. The "bitter cup" had prepared me for this and I overcame, coped and pressed on regardless; nonetheless, I was being wounded and the wounds were surfacing in my body as a variety of illnesses. JESUS' Angel with me was very present, he protected me, helped me find the various homes to extend the Sealing (I get lost easily), instructed me on how to eat, when to rest and a couple of times actually drove the car when I fell asleep at the wheel. One day, in this time period, while driving down the road, I saw JESUS coming to me `In The Spirit'. By this time I'd learned to continue functioning in this world and to move `In The Spirit' at the same time. I was so happy to see JESUS that I literally ran to Him `In The Spirit' and in my exuberance ran into the Lord and knocked JESUS down! We both fell to the ground with me on top. JESUS rolled around with me in His anus laughing and smiling and said, "Oh, that all my children were like you!" I was horrified, I'd knocked JESUS down; but then His Good-natured nonchalance about it all calmed me down. We both sat on the ground face to face, cross-legged, JESUS took hold of my shoulders and looked into my eyes. His eyes are electric, a deep awesome blue that are so alive and gentle and powerful all at once. His love for me only deepened my love for Him and
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the example He set is the one I wanted to be patterned after. The more we are near to JESUS, the more we want to be like Him and the more we KNOW Him, the more we can be like Him.
THE PRICE HE PAID FOR US
I remember reading a conclusion by some theologian who questioned if JESUS was nailed to the cross through His hands. In essence this professor said that the soft flesh of the hand could not hold the weight of His body and His body would have ripped away from the nails. I recall that this professor also advanced the idea that JESUS was nailed to the cross through His wrists. I read his study but didn't know anything more than what Scripture said. JESUS in His resurrection shewed His disciples the nail prints in His hands. How could that be? I didn't know but I believed the Bible account. In the early years when FATHER GOD was chewing me many things `In The Spirit' (like the creation for one) He did something equally unexpected. By this time I had an intimate relationship with JESUS, a loving one.
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One day FATHER GOD drew me `In The Spirit' during my abiding time. I became aware of traveling in ways I'd never done before, it was as if time and space were put aside. FATHER'S HAND was on me and I found myself in a place of darkness; at first I could not see much as the sun had ceased shining and the darkness covering the earth was, to be blunt, scary. There were some men with torches and the scene FATHER GOD brought to me cleared up. They were removing JESUS' body from the cross. I was stunned, FATHER GOD had taken me back in time (something only He can do) to the crucifixion. They were working the nails out of JESUS' palms and I noted that the Romans had tied JESUS' wrists to the cross with a rough hewn rope. I cannot describe the horror that swept through me when they removed the ropes and nails. JESUS' body, limp, cold and moist slumped over the shoulder of the man who had a ladder up to the cross to remove His body. I couldn't breathe, it was if my heart stopped and all I could do wass weep. The broken heartedness and sorrow that swept me was a pain unlike I'd ever experienced. To this day I can hardly talk about what I saw at the cross without getting choked up. Salvation is a very personal thing, I knew that He died on that cross to set me free of my sins, He paid the price for me, you, all of us. Beholding this scene I was keenly aware of the fact that all of nature, the whole of creation was stunned, holding its breath, so to speak, horrified at what had been done to the Son of God. The sun in the sky above was a black globe and this was not a lunar eclipse - the sun had simply shut off, the stars no longer gave light - all of creation had shut down shocked by the reality of what had been done. Years later I'd read accounts of some Romans who believed it was the "end of the world" when JESUS died on the cross. What I was seeing in this day told me that this estimation that this was "the end of the world" was not an exaggeration of that moment in time. Then out of His Goodness and Mercy, GOD The FATHER awakened His creation and I saw the sun stir and begin to shed its light and all of nature awakened and took a breath. Suddenly I was back in my prayer closet and opened my eyes which were streaming tears. I was shaken by the horror and sadness of what FATHER GOD had shewn me. The reality of the price JESUS paid for my sin, our sins, sunk deep inside my soul. Having been deeply touched by JESUS' love, kindness, compassion and
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gentleness brought the impact of what happened home. I would later reflect on the times when we walked hand-in-hand in the gardens of Heaven talking about everything one could imagine that I noted how all of creation jumped to excited life when JESUS came by. The animals (and there were nlaÂŤy
kinds in great numbers) would follow JESUS jumping and hopping in delight. JESUS had the capacity to acknowledge each and every creature with a smile and a word that calmed them in joy. Reflecting on this I understood that when JESUS walked the earth it was much the same; His creation recognized Him and were delighted at His Presence and then horrified at His execution on the cross.
ANGELIC ASSIGNMENT In the early years (1968-1971) of daily reading my Bible, praying and looking to JESUS, I would at times note seeing bright lights, almost Iike pin lights that seemed to be clustered together. At other times I noted black dots nearby that didn't stick around when the bright lights showed up. I concluded that I was seeing some parts of an Angel or Angels and the black dots likely being the fallen ones, demons or devils. On March 20, 1971 while at a Franciscan Monastery for a weekend retreat,* while waiting to enter the chapel for morning prayers, I saw an Angel standing in the corridor to our right which lead to this chapel, then another Angel in the corridor to our left. I was a bit stunned in seeing Angels so clearly for the first time that I blurted out to my dad (who was attending with me), "Dad, there are Angels all around us!" He didn't respond and at that moment the chapel doors were opened. *Note - A time of prayer and reflection under the governance of Franciscan monks,
The Angels were all the same size, they looked to be about five foot eight inches or so; their garments were awesome, some kind of glistening white fabric that flowed as if immersed in water. More, there was a distinct musical quality to the motion of the Angels' garments. Their faces were beautiful, which shone with the Glory of GOD their hair was a brilliant white, almost golden color. I remember that as I gazed at them, they smiled at me - they were aware that I saw them. That shook me up a bit at the time although I felt no threat or danger from them whatsoever, to the contrary they were an assuring and calming presence. Later this day. I would "conceive Christ" which is more commonly called "being born again." My walk with JESUS would begin that evening during which I came to know Him intimately. More later.