NEWENT BODY REPAIR CENTRE

5 Englishmen drive up to the Italian border in an old o -white Audi Qua ro. The polizia at the border post says one of them must get out of the car : “Ees illegal”, he declares, “to ‘ave 5 people in a car built for 4 — qua ro.” The Englishmen think this is silly and ask to speak to his superior, but he says : “Sorry, ees no possible. You see, over zere, my Inspector, he cant-a come. Ee’s abusy with zose two men in ze green Fiat Uno.”

Have you had too many people in your car? Did it cause an accident? Or has your car got other dents or scratches. You wouldn’t want to travel round Europe in a damaged car, so why drive round here at home in one? Time to give us a call, capiche? It’s the number for all repairs. www.newentbodyrepairs.co.uk

We are an independent family run funeral directors that was established in 1969 by John Hall and now operates as a partnership of his sons and grandsons. From our premises in Churcham, Gloucester we offer a nationwide service 24 hours a day. We understand that every family has different requirements and we are happy to work with you to fulfil your loved ones wishes, from a traditional service to an eco friendly funeral.

• We undertake all necessary arrangements

• Private chapel of rest

• Hearse, limousines and other transport options available

• Funeral services of all faiths and cultures