Underlings

JACK COEY

it was that night at malecky’s when it fi rst came to me that you’re not all you think you are and i certainly didn’t like the way you spoke to the waiter who was only trying to make sense of what you wanted and you couldn’t be gracious about it i wasn’t rude — i may have been a bit sharp but i wasn’t rude well you hurt shirley’s feeling when you dismissed the death of her dog oh really now it was only a dog for pity sake it’s not like it was her father or something still it was insensitive on your part not to be more compassionate ok how about this i’ll go to sensitivity training (smile) i don’t think you’re funny sorry but you’re being judgmental the fault dear brutus is not in the stars but in ourselves that we are underlings huh? your bad behavior is the point and not as you would make out my pointing it out to you what bad behavior? what you are doing right now your clueless act is annoying pardon me i wish it were that simple you’ve lost that loving feeling (smile) your fl ippancy is a defense mechanism thank-you doctor to whom do i make the check out you couldn’t see shirley was emotional maybe i was threatened somehow (pause) wow a sliver of illumination (stare) i have feelings too you know really wouldn’t it be lovely if you shared some of those every so often okay i feel like you don’t like me much how astute i had other feelings about the night i came to the apartment and you and shirley were in the bedroom together and you acted funny it would have been considerate if you’d let me know you were coming remember but in ourselves that we are underlings yeah oh look who’s defensive now i have no reason to be defensive nor offer any justifi cation for my behavior (laugh) but you can nail me to the cross this is impossible ok so what were you and shirley doing none of your business we can discuss my shortcomings but not yours you’re more fl awed than i (grin) from your point of view what else matters by golly why didn’t i think of that because all you can think of is yourself you should ask shirley which of us is the more selfi sh why would she know because she was with me last week oh that’s where the rash came from (grin)

Jack Coey is a washed up actor living in bitterness. He lives in Keene, NH.