MINDIE’S MUSINGS OVERCOMING INSECURITIES

By Mindie Barnett

uthor and motivational speaker Mindie Barnett answers your questions about life, navigating these stressful and uncertain times, while steering you down a more straightforward path.

We welcome your questions and invite you to reach out to Mindie at mindiesmusings1@gmail.com.

Dear Mindie,

I turn to chocolate and junk food to protect myself from insecurities. Unfortunately, I then end up feeling worse about myself after eating. How do I break this habit?

Sincerely,

Sweet & Salty

Dear Sweet & Salty,

Don’t beat yourself up. We all have shortcomings we turn to cope and soothe ourselves. Some of us, unfortunately, select maladaptive mechanisms to self-medicate. This can look like many things: drugs and alcohol, sex, shopping, cheating on our partners, binge eating/ starvation, or eating junk food, to name a few. But, of course, indulging in some chocolate occasionally when you feel low is not the biggest crime you can commit. I appreciate the aftermath leaves you feeling less than others; however, as with almost everything in life - small doses are best.

Scientifically, chocolate does make us happy. The ingredients release serotonin, which boosts our mood, which is why chocolate is typically the go-to food for comfort. In addition, chocolate contains anandamide, a neurotransmitter whose name comes from Sanskrit “ananda,” meaning joy and delight. Anandamides stimulate the brain in a similar way that cannabis does. So, it’s perfectly normal to gravitate toward chocolate to feel good and comfortable.

The bigger question, the issue, is why you feel insecure. We all have insecurities and elements of ourselves we wish we could change or are not confident about. That’s perfectly normal. How we manage such feelings is where the road can become a slippery slope of pitfalls. Why not explore your insecurities, one at a time, and create an evidence chart to back up why you feel you lack in these areas of your life or about yourself? Then create an opposite list of reasons to contest your feelings. Then pen another list of healthy alternatives to eating chocolate that brings you joy and comfort. That may look like listening to a good podcast, indulging in a mindless show on Netflix, cuddling with a pet, talking to a good friend, or listening to some of your favorite music while doing an activity you love. Make that your go-to routine when you need self-soothing instead of turning to chocolate. your feelings of insecurity and anxiety at bay.

Another way to ensure you adhere to this healthier form of coping is to incorporate a piece of the ritual daily. For instance, if you choose to assume vegetating in front of the TV and watching Netflix, try and allow yourself 30 minutes of such leisure a day.

Another way to ensure you adhere to this healthier form of coping is to incorporate a piece of the ritual daily. For instance, if you choose to assume vegetating in front of the TV and watching Netflix, try and allow yourself 30 minutes of such leisure a day. That could be before bed, after a long day at work, or after dinner as a treat. Science shows that implementing an act consistently will help solidify a habit faster. In addition, you’ll proactively keep your feelings of insecurity and anxiety at bay.

The routine will become a form of self-preservation instead of only selfsurvival. The more you keep at it, the faster the pattern will be set in stone, and your desire for chocolate as a coping mechanism will melt away.

Love, Mindie