On a scale of one to ten, with ten being a trip to the moon eating s’mores and dancing to 80s synth pop hits, this will be a .0017. But a good .0017.
It had only been a week. I was already searching craigslist. My roommate was having the loudest orgasms ever and I had no way to escape the “oooohs,” “aaahs” and “ommfgs.” Then I realized all I needed to get away was a pair of noise cancelling headphones.
Bose
Portals to your secret dimension.
I’ve been a preschool teacher, babysat since eleven years old and watched the birthing video on a planetarium dome. One thing is clear to me. Babies are not the same humans you and I are.
Fisher Price Welcome to earth.
Leaked files from the inception of Fisher Price, served as episodic ads on Hulu I.
Welcome to Fisher Price Observatories. After extensive investigations, we have made an unprecedented discovery. What we refer to as “babies” are actually extraterrestrial beings. Aliens from the planet Wombella, located 800 billion light years away in the Stork-99 galaxy.
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The babies planet can only sustain life for nine months, so to continue survival, they travel to earth, abundant with life-supporting humans. After several longitudinal studies, data confirms the babies intent to one day rule over us. Leaving us with the dilemma, to help their quest or to defend our planet.
III.
To facilitate peaceful relations, we have made it our mission to assist the babies in their take over, building gear to acclimate them to our world and toys to teach them our ways of life. We are currently working with parent ambassadors to help with the distribution process.
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WELCOME TO EARTH | FISHER PRICE
WELCOME TO EARTH | FISHER PRICE LOGIN SHOP
YOUR BABY’S JOURNEY
WATCH THE STORY
ALIEN-YOUR-BABY
LEAGUE OF EARTHLY AMBASSADORS
LOGIN SHOP
YOUR BABY’S JOURNEY
WATCH THE STORY
BABY’S SPIRIT ALIEN
YOUR BABY’S JOURNEY
WATCH THE STORY
ALIEN-YOUR-BABY
LEAGUE OF EARTHLY AMBASSADORS
YOUR BABY’S JOURNEY post-landing
LEAGUE OF EARTHLY AMBASSADORS
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Alio Huma
Huma Huma
WELCOME TO EARTH | FISHER PRICE
Alio Rolliton
LOGIN SHOP
YOUR BABY’S JOURNEY
ALIEN-YOUR-BABY
WATCH THE STORY
At five months old, your little alien is beginning to reach out and grasp the world around it. Increasing eye-hand coordination and tummy-to-back rolling allows it to navigate and explore its new environment with a greater sense of discovery. We recommend a variety of safe objects and toys in different shapes, sizes and textures to help improve its earthly learning.
LEAGUE OF EARTHLY AMBASSADORS
ALIEN ACTIVITY TRACKER
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BABIES on the way
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The Welcome to Earth section of the Fisher Price website gives parents the ability to track their baby’s progress from womb through childhood. And along the way, creates tie-ins to sell Fisher Price toys and gear.
Service
The League of Earthly Ambassadors is a club to help busy parents and increase Fisher Price sales. Parents will sign up for yearly memberships and each month, Fisher Price will recommend age-appropriate toys and gear. Parents can review options online, select what they would like to receive and have the products mailed directly to their home. As their children develop, Fisher Price is there every step of the way.
What could happen if you launched an album’s lyrics before its music and voice?
Anticipate By You + Faith Hill
Mystery creates.
Six weeks before Faith’s album is released, the website anticipatefaithhill.com would launch the album’s lyrics. Visitors would be able to download a song booklet, but also record and submit their covers, created by mouth or by hand.
We gave song lyrics from Faith Hill’s previous album Fireflies to friends at school. They had never heard the music, and came back to us with their own rap covers, acoustic guitar songs, shirt designs and photography.
Beyond the site, covers would live on Flickr, Twitter and Youtube and the project would be seeded to influential music bloggers to get them spreading the word.
A PR push would also start the campaign and land Faith on talk shows like Ellen, where instead of being the musical guest performing, she would be the musical guest listening to Ellen’s cover song. Out-of-home recording booths in urban shopping malls would collect spur-of-the-moment covers. Fans would be able to create accompanying music, record the lyrics and have their songs instantly uploaded to the website.
These engagements would let Faith distribute her lyric booklet to audience members.
When the anticipation finally comes to a crescendo and the album is released with Faith’s voice and accompanying music, in-store listening stations and online players would allow fans to compare Faith’s versions to what the public created. The best lyric creations could be integrated into Faith’s tour as merchandise, set design and opening acts. Faith could even cover her own covers. By sharing the same set of lyrics with the world, Faith would elevate her album launch to a higher level of excitement and engage a wider audience of fans. GreenLight called the idea “brave” and is working with its possibilities for the future.
How do you get your mean older brother who ignores you and gives you no respect and calls you a hat to all of a sudden really really like you? Making him laugh is a good place to start.
Tim Hortons Proof that Canada exists.
Bus shelter ads
Newspaper
In-store
The weekend before new Tim Hortons open, “lost” Canadian backpackers will go around town, asking for directions. If people are nice enough to help them, they’ll receive this coupon.
Window cling
Daily blog to bring Americans Timbit-sized facts, additional proof that Canada is, in fact, still up there.
If being smart is a competitive sport, then why can’t NOVA, the ne plus ultra of fascinating science documentaries, foster some friendly competition?
NOVA zap
WARNING: You may be at risk for zombism and not even know it. An outbreak of mind numbing substances has resulted in a sudden epidemic of boring brains. Monitor your brain levels and score joules of energy to destroy mindlessness. It’s as easy as downloading zap as your personal brain gadget.
NOVA zap is a low-impact game that rewards curiosity with NOVA and related science content. The object of the game is to trigger curiosity to zap “zombism,” or mindlessness. To start playing, users download a plug-in for their browser from the NOVA section of the PBS website, install and the game is on. Players monitor their brain activity and score energy points, called joules. Earning points lets players level up through five tiers of brain power and become masters in the 13 NOVA topics. Players receive NOVA suggested search results, making NOVA an authority on what’s science and what’s science fiction.
Visiting accredited sources earns players joules, making their brain energy brighten and expand. But mind-numbing sites, like Perez, would actually subtract points.
Players can show off their zap scores on blogs and other social sites through an embedded badge.
NOVA will have a leader board on its website so players can stack themselves up against the whole country, even popular scientists like Neil De Grasse Tyson.
Just like Nike+ or Wii Fit, players will have metrics to monitor and analyze their activity, visualizing their progress or demise in real time.
Microgames related to specific NOVA shows will bring in new players. A zap player could challenge her Facebook friend in a game of evil science, for example.
And zap could be bigger than just online, rewarding players for real life science activities, such as visiting a museum.
When people watch NOVA shows, they’ll be informed that they’re earning joules and be asked at the end of the show to activate their brain energy. Just like Fantasy Football helps promote the NFL, NOVA zap is a game bigger than a start and finish line. It creates a NOVA mindset.
“What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.� -Charles Bukowski
874 Lived Dickies don’t die.
1) 874lived.com launches with 100 tests
2) Targeted online ads drive traffic to the site 3) Fans can participate in the remaining 774 tests
4) In-store point-of-purchase displays calls out tests the pants have recently survived
100 tests to launch 874lived.com 001 - Or Are You Happy to See Me?: See how many bananas fit in pant pockets 002 - Chess Boxing: Perform game of chess wearing pants; then box wearing pants 003 - A-Show: WWE wrestler gives the pants a professional smack down 004 - Field Day: Stage massive water balloon fight, Dickies vs. non-Dickies 005 - Apocalypse: Mob of zombies attack pants 006 - Mom, I Can’t Find Pudgie: Hamster tunnels through pants wearing mounted camera 007 - Recess: World-class jump rope crew does routine wearing matching pants 008 - Slaughterama: Play game of bike jousting in pants 009 - Crankflip: BMX rider learns how to do a crankflip while wearing pants; many falls 010 - Psycho: Reinterpret shower scene from the movie Psycho with actress wearing pants in shower 011 - Man Cave: Paint bullseye on pants; hammer to wall; play darts 012 - Tug of War: Two men on stilts hold opposite pant legs and play game of tug of war 013 - Soup of the Day: Boil pants in chicken broth for 10 minutes; attempt to serve to unsuspecting bystander 014 - Magician’s Assistant: Divide pants in two in live performance 015 - Lonely in the Desert: Rub pants on cactus 016 - Gym Class: Use pants as pull-up bar 017 - Gnarly: Wear pants while surfing the Pipeline 018 - Hat Trick: Have pants body checked by three hockey players 019 - The Smoker: BBQ Pit Masters compete for the title of best BBQ Dickies 020 - LA Afternoon: Ghost ride the whip in pants 021 - Houston, We Have Liftoff: Attach pants to firecrackers and bottle rockets; light 022 - Birds Beware: Fill pants with hay; make scarecrow and leave in corn field for two weeks 023 - Mosh Pit: Slam into people wearing pants for three Gwar songs 024 - First Grade Arts and Crafts: Cover pants with peanut butter and birdseed; let birds eat 025 - Under Pressure: Hose pants with pressure washer 026 - Man’s Best Friend: Dog buries pants in backyard 027 - 4x100: Use pants as finish line for track race 028 - Plays Well With Others: Friend writes 1-page short story about pants; other friend acts out short story 029 - Be Back Soon: Ride across a state on motorcycle wearing pants 030 - Venice Beach: Skate the Venice boardwalk in pants 031 - Rapids: Kayak down river wearing pants 032 - Avalanche: Roll pants into ball; roll down snowy hill 033 - Salsa: Perform a salsa number wearing pants 034 - Optimum No Rinse: Strap pants to roof of car; put through car wash 035 - Dummy: Crash dummy wears pants in crash while listening to Crash Dummies “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm” 036 - Be All You Can Be: Wear pants and complete NAVY SEAL obstacle course 037 - Punching Bag: Fill pants with sand; use as punching bag 038 - Worst Date Ever: Date throws glass of red wine on lap during argument 039 - Full Moon Party: Party all night in Thailand beach rave; fall asleep in pants under the stars 040 - Ice Tray: Freeze pants in water until it forms block of ice; break apart 041 - Crazy Cat Lady: Rub pants in cat nip and let loose in house with multiple cats 042 - Mad Scientist: 1 hour to transform Dickies into new type of gadget 043 - Cannon Ball : Shoot pants out of T-shirt cannon at professional sporting events 044 - Summer Camp: Throw flour, chocolate sauce and mustard on pants in 200 person food fight 045 - Too Much Tequila: Ride mechanical bull at bar while wearing pants 046 - Slip ‘n’ Slide: Wear pants down world’s largest slip ‘n’ slide 047 - Sand Angels - Travel down a beach by making angel prints in the sand 048 - Water Skiing Girlfriend: Use as water ski handle 049 - Canada’s pet: Run pants over with Zamboni 050 - Stay Out: Scale barbed wire fence in pants
051 - Chemistry Class: Pour hydrochloric acid on pants 052 - 100m: Use pants as finish line for 100m sprint 053 - New Game: Put pants in front of camera for game of Chatroulette 054 - Rush Hour: Put pants in street to get run over by cars 055 - Sasquatch : Go “missing” in the woods for a couple weeks; pants only article of clothing 056 - The Rescue: Throw cabbage patch doll out burning window; catch with pants 057 - Anchor: Attach pants to cinder block; leave in lake for a week 058 - Bear Trap: Catch pants in bear trap 059 - Door Mat: Throw party; let guests wipe shoes off on pants 060 - Bubbles: Blow bubbles at pant 061 - Liar Liar: Set pant leg on fire 062 - Sand Down My Pants: Power sand pant leg 063 - Windy Day: Attach to kite; fly 064 - Bait ‘n’ Primed: Set 100 mousetraps; try to sneak pants past them 065 - Where’s Rabbit?: Magician pulls pants out of a top hat 066 - US Postal Service: Put pants through rain, snow, sleet and hail 067 - Hell’s Angels: get in a bar brawl in pants 068 - Piñata: Fill pants with candy; let kids beat with sticks 069 - LIT 301: Read poetry to pants 070 - State Fair: Attach pants to front of bumper cars and take them for a spin 071 - “Untitled”: Hang pants on wall in modern art museum; film visitors reactions 072 - Fashion week: Streak across a runway show in pants 073 - No AAA: Pull car that’s broken down at side of road with pants 074 - The Naked Ninjas: JabbaWockeeZ dance crew gives special 874 Lived performance wearing pants 075 - Prom After-Party: Jump off roof into swimming pool in pants 076 - Happy Birthday to Me: Clown sets record for most balloon animals made in a minute while wearing pants 077 - It’s Limbo Time: Two people on sidewalk; play limbo song and encourage people to limbo under pants 078 - Strip Poker: Wear 5 pairs of pants of increasing sizes; win game of strip poker 079 - The Gentleman: Hold pants over girl’s head to keep her from getting wet when it’s thunderstorming 080 - Zip line: Fold Dickies over zip line, hold legs of pant and sail on 081 - Las Vegas: Get married in pants 082 - Eternity: Make stop motion film of pants running in a circle 083 - Autograph: Walk around campus with sharpie; collect signatures until pant legs are completely covered 084 - ffffound: Make an emotional love note on pants; take photo and get it posted on ffffound.com 085 - Driving Range: Roll pants into ball, tee off 086 - Escape Goat: Catch and return goat to its pen while wearing pants 087 - Lumberjack: Run across log booms in pants 088 - Son’s Birthday: Build tree house while wearing pants 089 - Best Friend’s Day: Jump off giant rope swing into river wearing pants 090 - Rolly Polly: Roll down ginormous hill while wearing pants 091 - Relax, Max: Teach Yoga class while wearing pants 092 - Rockstar: Smash guitar and drum set while wearing pants 093 - Just Another Monday: Staple pants to desk chair and push off roof of office building 094 - Jingle Bells: Hammer zipper to the tune of Jingle Bells 095 - Greener Napkin Etiquette: Use pants for bib while eating barbecue sandwich 096 - Roger That - Wing walker does routine wearing pants 097 - Special Delivery: Bake pants in brick oven at 450 degrees for 10 minutes; put in pizza box and deliver 098 - Jackson Pollock: Splatter paint pants; attempt to sell as art on street 099 - Florida Vacation: Wrestle alligator wearing pants 100 - Sick’em: Command police attack dog to attack pants
PARTNERS IN CRIME BOSE // Lana Shahmoradian FISHER PRICE // Lana Shahmoradian ANTICIPATE FAITH HILL // Alyssa Collis, Alex Haglund, Kelly Foss, Justin Gamero, Meg Ingraham, Maureen McFee and Brad Getty TIM HORTONS // Maggie McClurken NOVA // Julia Veinberg, Lana Shahmoradian, Jessica Collis, Layne Wilson, Blake Manosh, David Cromer, Drew Dayberry and Talia Ledner DICKIES // Alyssa Collis
“The end is out there somewhere.” -Googlism.com