Postpartum Depression and Anxiety Infographic by Gabrielle Edgecombe

Anxiety i dead tired and desperate

by Dezyrae Batzer by Gabrielle Chavarria

please, i beg writhing with my hand on the headboard and sobs escaping in ragged breaths, please. want me like i want you, fuck me like i fuck you, rip me apart or rip me open. figure out what makes it tick so you can dig it out and break it. dig. i’m so fucking tired of excavating myself. my ribcage is a tomb and my fingernails are filled with dirt and decay.

but you whisper you love me.

i play mary in my Pieta wearing an impenetrable sheet of sheer fabric sculpted out of marble to cover my unseeing eyes wondering why why why won’t you reach for me? or give yourself to me? or take me? please just take me. this knowing, or unknowing, it’s the same, my doubt sits stone heavy, balanced on the edge of our bed and mocking me for my faith in you: when will you remember that no one is ever who you want them to be when you want them to be that?

i’ve closed every door and every window between you and me so i live alone in an empty room in the home you built for us. and i’m sorry that it’s my fault.