The Ride or Die Chick

The Ride or Die Chick: A Cautionary Tale

A Conversation with Lana Hampton

by Sherifat Mohammed

Many women, myself included, take pride in being a ride or die chick for our men. We hold him down when times get tough or we uplift him when he needs encouragement. We hear it in all the songs about men needing a “ride or die chick”. Now, there is nothing wrong with being the ride or die chick for your man. It’s a cruel world and it’s a very cruel world for black men or men of color. However, what happens when being the “ride or die chick” lands you in prison? I got the opportunity to have a conversation with Lana Hampton about how being a ride or die chick sent her to prison. She is currently waiting to turn herself in to serve a three and half year sentence. In our conversation, we discuss how she landed in this situation, what her definition of love is, and what advice she has for other young ladies who are “ride or die chick”. Check out our conversation.

SM: Where are you from? Where did you grow up?

LH: Well, let me start from the beginning. My name is Lana Hampton. I’m originally from Belle Glade, Florida, but I was raised in a little town in Yemassee, South Carolina.

SM: Do you remember when you met your ex-boyfriend?

LH: Which one are you referring to? I’ve got a lot of those.

SM: (Laughs) Don’t we all. The one who got you involved in the situation that you happen to find yourself in now.

LH: Ah… I met him maybe five years ago—through a best friend of mine. She was actually dating his cousin. I met him in 2013.

SM: He is your ex-boyfriend right?

LH: Yeah… even though he tried to pretend to his lil girlfriend that me and him were never romantically involved, but everyone knew [we were].

SM: Got it. What are you charged with?

LH: I’m charged with wire fraud. Wire fraud is the only charge they gave me. However, my initial charge was money laundering, bank fraud, and deceiving the MBE. They only charged me with one—one count which I’m grateful for.

SM: How did you get involved with doing wire fraud?

LH: He (my ex-boyfriend) presented it to me. He and I did a lot of other business ventures together. None like this. I trusted him. I was romantically involved with him for a short period of time. And then we became very good friends. Then he began dating a 90s R&B Singer. He [allegedly] started to re-vamp her career. It was a necessity—for money at that time [for me] at that point. He [allegedly] funded her latest project. Then I met her. She and I became cool. [Regarding the wire fraud] What was told to me, was that the construction manager over the whole thing is a personal friend of [my ex-boyfriend’s]. I met him twice. I flew to Houston to pick up some money from the guy and we never really had a formal introduction. So, I just thought he was a business partner—only because I trusted [my ex-boyfriend]. So, when he came to me with the business opportunity, [he said] all I need you to do is be a minority business owner. I need you to open a business with the secretary of state in Texas and his friend was going to be the contract manager over a big project in downtown. [My ex-boyfriend] said he would pay me 20 percent. [He told] me that I didn’t have to go to Texas. I didn’t have to oversee the work. He said we were going to sub-contract it out. I thought cool. I trusted him. I thought, that’s good money for me. We’ll continue to do other projects. So, I obliged.

SM: When your ex-boyfriend asked you to open the business—did you get a sense that it may be illegal? Or something was funny about it?

LH: No, I did trust him. I didn’t get a sense that it was something illegal or wrong. I was the first one [out of the co-defendants] to open any business which was Lucent and Wholesale Lighting and Fixtures. The first invoice that came to me was $128,000. I thought they were ordering fixtures. So, I thought everything was fine. [Not only did I open a lighting business] I got a warehouse [in Texas] and I got insurance on the warehouse. I was told that’s where they would keep the supplies. It wasn’t until I got the second invoice for $349,000—by this time [my ex] had recruited his best friend’s girlfriend. I sat down and showed them how to open a business with the secretary of state and everything that I had done. But when I saw the second invoice—I questioned it because it didn’t have fixtures attached. When I questioned [my ex and his best friend] his first reply was that the vendor that he’s sub-contracting the work out to— hadn’t sent their inventory sheet over yet. Just sign it and it will be fine. I thought hmm… that’s a little sketchy, but I trusted him. [I thought] you know [he] would never do me like that. Right then, I could have made a choice to dig in a little deeper. I tried to be like— I’m going to put this in your court. [He] asked his best friend’s girlfriend to get involved, her god-daughter and his brother— so [he’s] recruiting all these people— [everything] must be on the up and up even though there’s something about that invoice that wasn’t right—and I’m smart enough to know that. One of the co-defendants called me to let me know that the singer he was "dating" was getting sued for $3.16 million for [allegedly] using illegal proceeds to fund her latest project and all of our names were in the lawsuit. I called [my ex] and asked him about what was going on and he said they are [allegedly] suing her and I would never hurt you Lana. I was jaded because I was sleeping with him—you know how sometimes women get a little jaded—not that I’m not a smart woman. I just wanted to believe that he was being who he said he was. He’s been good to me and my family—I wanted to believe what could be the possibility—even though he was still dating someone else.

SM: Why did you do it? Why didn’t you ask him to open the business in his name—you know tell him I got myhands full?

LH: I worked for a small company prior to that—I did a lot of project management for AT&T. The company wasn’t paying me what I felt like I was worth. I had been there for maybe five and half to six years. I met him at the brink of all of that. We started dating and in the midst of all that—he was taking care of me and helping me out. He was like you’re working for these people, you’re not making money like that. Why don’t you help me with some of my things. I was his personal assistant in a sense. I was helping him with his real estate.

SM: Wow, that’s heavy for real.

LH: He was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde—He was like whole other man. When I sat for my briefing with the feds—and I’m reading the paper work—some of things he said—I’m like who is this person. I don’t even know this man. Now, I’m feeling crazy.

SM: Dang. That’s crazy. So, when you got caught—what happened?

LH: It was really subtle. I didn’t see it coming. I did not. I had an inkling that something may happen because that same guy—the construction manager—he told me to create another, on his own, company. It never came from my ex-boyfriend. So, I called Ex and asked him. The construction manager reached out to me about another company—do you know anything about that? He was like naw, I’m going to call him. So, when he called me back —I was like, do you think he’s involved in something? Or he working for the feds? He was like naw that (expletive) know better. No, not at all. You tripping. Its [a] gut [feeling] happening, but he talked me down, basically and told me it was nothing illegal that went on—it was on the up and up. I was tripping. It was sort of a feeling.

SM: That gut feeling.

LH: Yeah. It was more of a feeling. Again, that one invoice always stood out in my mind. Even though I got my money and everybody got their money. And he lied so much. I didn’t even know the money was going to other people’s account. Once, I showed them how to open up their business with the secretary of state. He had full control. When I got picked up by the feds they gave me supervisor role—saying that I was controlling everyone. I told them that wasn’t the case, and I had to prove that.

SM: What? Really?

LH: Everybody was giving him the money.

SM: What?

LH: Hmm. Hmm. He was duping everyone. When I tell you he was a crafty individual. I thought I was smart and met all the street dudes, but by far he goes down as the craftiest individual when it comes to manipulation.

SM: You have to give me a second to catch my breath.

LH: I was blindsided by the feds. I happen to be at my house and one of my really good girlfriends whom I brought in at the last part; called me and she was like (expletive) the feds are at my house. Her husband called her and told her that I had a warrant out in Texas. I was like what? And she was like yes. She asked did I know what was going on? I didn’t have a clue. So, at that same time, at my child’s father house—his sister called me and she told me the feds were swarming his house.

SM: What?

LH: It’s a lot going on. I called my Ex I told him the feds are at my friends house, my good girlfriend, and at my child’s father house. What is going on? He said: “What? You’re kidding right?” I said what the (expletive) would I be kidding about something like this. So, then he said: “I’m going to call you back.” I guess he made a call to see if they were looking for him and the other people he knew. So, by that time I get another call from a relative— telling me they’re looking for me. This is how crazy life is. The agent that arrested me 14 years ago—was looking for me. He got my number and called me. He said: “Hi. This is an old friend of yours. I’m going to ask you to turn yourself in because I have a warrant out in Texas for you”. I said for what? He says wire fraud, money laundering and defrauding the MBE. He asked me where I was at. I said that I was out of town in Florida with my mom. He was going to send a car to get me. So, then I thought let me stop playing because I remembered he was one those policemen you didn’t want to play with. So, I was like I’m home—I don’t live at that home anymore. I said I will meet you wherever you want me to. He said I will give you till tomorrow to turn yourself in. That was a Thursday. He gave me till Friday morning to meet his agents to turn myself in. I went down to the [Richard B. Russell Building] and turned myself in. They let me sign myself out on bond and I ended up coming home and I was on probation from that point up until now.

SM: Whew. That’s heavy. Let me ask you this. This is a two part question. What is your definition of a ride or diechick. When I hear your story—I can tell you really loved and trusted him. So, I want to know what your definition of love was then and what your definition of love is now?

LH: A ride or die chick—well I guess I can say I’ve been that for a lot of men in my life: that means it doesn’t matter what you’re doing—whether it’s illegal; whether it’s right or wrong, you got him. If we want to put it in not even in the context of [the] street. Like if my husband— if he got sick on his job, and he couldn’t work anymore as a ride or die—

Lana Hampton

Michael D. Photography

I’m getting up and doing whatever I got to do to make sure the bills are paid. I’m riding with him. I’m going to die with that (expletive). And if we’re doing something illegal and a shoot out came—Ride or die (expletive). If we robbing a bank and I agree to it—we riding. We get in a shoot out, we dying together. We don’t care about rules. It means that by any means necessary you riding for that dude you messing with. Whether it’s legal or illegal. And the second part— you know, I’m going to really go deep with you. I go to counselling for bipolar depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. I can tell you love to me then— My definition was that I would love you till I self-destruct. I can care about someone until I self-destruct. I loved him, because I was willing to put up with anything he gave me. Meaning he could talk crazy to me. Meaning I could see him doing something that was disrespectful and I accepted it. And that’s why I said I love so much that I self-destruct. I loved to the point where I would hurt myself before I hurt you. That’s what it is to me. But now, that I’m going to therapy, I’m beginning to understand that I need work, which coming from the background I come from—it’s like when you don’t know your self- worth, you’re willing to take anything anyone gives you. When you feel like you can’t say no because you’re not being loyal. You can’t set boundaries because you don’t want that person not to be with you or love you back even though it’s not love. You are so delusional on what you’re supposed to be getting because you don’t know what it is. I’m still up in the air with setting boundaries with understanding how I’m supposed to feel. Understanding how I’m supposed to be treated. Understanding my worth and when I look in the mirror—I know that I am a beautiful woman inside and out.

SM: What advice would you give to other ride or die chicks?

LH: I would encourage women to not to be a ride or die chick, and if they are— have boundaries to what that means. When you’re out doing things that could jeopardize your family, your freedom—I would definitely re-evaluate that. Because no other person is worth your life. So, that means you have some issues you need to work on—that you’re willing to sacrifice yourself for someone else. Because everyone is not worthy of that. Personally, I don’t think anyone is worthy of your life other than your children. My kids. I would ride for my kids, but we’re talking about loving men. Someone that could possibly not love you back the same and probably got two or three of you doing the same thing. So, I would ask them to dig deep and evaluate who their giving that love to and who their riding and dying for.