Leading to Support Our Communities

Michelle Bihary, B App. Sc. (OT), Grad. Dip. Family Therapy

One of the best ways to support our communities, whether clients, professional colleagues, or our personal network, is to strengthen how we lead ourselves and others.

In the Spring 2020 issue of Connections, Associate Professor Carol McKinstry respectfully questioned whether, as occupational therapists, we adequately adopted our role as influencers. She invited us to level up, and consider how we could be more proactive and strategic. Perhaps we can all learn to step outside our constraints—like thinking we’re not good enough—to help us better support ourselves and our communities.

For a profession that has felt undervalued and ignored, a psychodynamic lens would encourage us to consider whether we value and appreciate ourselves. Through many years in this profession—as a leader, supervisor, coach, and trainer—I share a common acknowledgement about how self-critical occupational therapists are. Unnecessary self-criticism shadows our strengths, skills, and practice wisdom.

Many occupational therapists and professionals expect positive and empowering leadership from others, that they do not give themselves. On the contrary, many of us lead ourselves the opposite to how we would lead others, or want them to lead us. This discrepancy highlights a powerful opportunity. By leading ourselves more positively and effectively, we can elevate how we support and lead others.

“Exceptional leaders distinguish themselves because of superior self-leadership.” —Daniel Goleman

Leading Yourself

Most of us give scant attention to how we lead ourselves, yet it is pivotal in how we lead and support others. We often consider leadership as being attached to a position or formal role, when we are actually all leaders. We lead ourselves 24/7 and build leading relationships, whether we manage others or work in teams.

When we consider how we can strengthen the leadership of our communities, the starting point is leading ourselves. We need to step up and be our own best leader.

What is Self-Leadership?

Self-leadership is an emerging concept that encourages us to apply leadership principles, values, and practices to ourselves. It requires a high level of self-awareness, self-direction, and self-management. Taking personal responsibility for our energy, performance, wellbeing, and openness to learning ensures we function optimally and have a more positive impact on others.

Self-leadership is an intrapersonal relationship. We all have an internal relationship with ourselves that, like all relationships, has unique attributes, strengths, weaknesses, and dynamics. This intrapersonal relationship reflects how we treat and relate to ourselves. In his groundbreaking book Emotional Intelligence, psychologist Daniel Goleman points out that the best leaders place significant attention on leading themselves.

We can’t lead others if we can’t lead ourselves. Yet most of us are unaware that by actively leading ourselves, we will more positively impact our communities, clients, colleagues, and loved ones, too.

Conversely, poor self-leadership has a negative impact on ourselves, our relationships, our professional lives, and our wellbeing. It can lead us to being significantly depleted and unable to offer our best selves to our communities. At worst, it can lead us to operate below the line in ways that are detrimental to ourselves and those around us.

Positive self-leaders operate above the line. Through high-level self-care, selfawareness, and self-leadership they bring their best selves to their communities. They naturally create a climate that is psychologically safe, where relationships are built on respect, authenticity, and integrity. This forms fertile ground for a highperforming environment in which clients, colleagues, or loved ones can flourish.

CASE STUDY

Steps to Build Self-Leadership

Samantha (not her real name) owns a very successful, large, occupational therapy private practice. Through a leadership development program, Samantha recognised how poorly she was leading herself. She ran herself into the ground, rarely switched off, felt overly responsible for everything, and continually let her battery run dry.

Consequently, she didn’t feel she was being the mother, partner, and leader she wanted to be. Although she prioritised her client community through her specialist clinical work, she lacked the emotional capacity to invest in her personal or professional communities in ways that aligned with her values.

Although she spent time with her family, she worried about how often she was preoccupied with work, and mentally and emotionally absent to them. She was concerned that she did not step back from her practice and delegate more effectively, or apply the values that inspired her practice.

She was astounded by the concept of self-leadership, having never considered how she was leading herself and the impact it was having on her communities.

Through coaching, Samantha took steps to build self-leadership in three critical ways. Continual self-criticism undermined Samantha’s capacity to recognise and appreciate her strengths, skills, and practice wisdom. By turning the volume down on unnecessary selfcritical talk, and recognising her skills and strengths, Samantha developed a more balanced view of herself. This helped her to significantly reduce her high self-expectations and perfectionist tendencies. She became far more relaxed, centred, and grounded in herself and her own potential.

1Self-Awareness First, Samantha focused on establishing a deeper level of selfawareness and self-acceptance. Every time we speak to ourselves, we build an internal dialogue that can either support or undermine us. Over time, this forms a template for other relationships. If we are critical of ourselves, we may be more critical of others, or more aware of their weaknesses, even if we don’t express them. 2Self-Direction Samantha clarified her personal and professional values, and ensured they informed every aspect of her life. This highlighted values she was striving to fulfil in serving her community, yet were absent from interactions with herself, colleagues, and loved ones. To bring out the best in herself, Samantha strengthened her self-direction and personal agency. She planned how to live in alignment with her values and aspirations, describing a far more balanced lifestyle that nourished her physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing. She has made huge inroads into fulfilling all her occupations with greater ease.

3Self-Management Thirdly, Samantha self-managed her tendency to regress into old habits when stressed. Although she made considerable progress, she still needed deeper awareness of the triggers that set her back. Setbacks provided valuable lessons in how to support herself during tough times, to ensure she didn’t go backwards. This learning created sustainability.

We can’t lead others if we can’t lead ourselves.

Final Thoughts

The steps towards enhancing self-leadership will be unique to us all. One of the best approaches is to lead ourselves as we would like to be led, or would lead others.

Self-leadership allows us to optimise our occupational functioning and build on our potential, strengths, values, and practice wisdom.

Positive and empowering self-leadership is a psychologically responsible and sustainable way to bring out the best in ourselves, to best support the communities we seek to serve.

About the Author Michelle Bihary is a mental health occupational therapist, trainer, supervisor, coach, and author of Leading Above the Line: Applying Neuroscience to Build Psychologically Safe and Thriving Teams.

References Bihary, M. (2020). Leading Above the Line: Applying Neuroscience to Build Psychologically Safe and Thriving Teams Blanchard, K. (2020). Developing Self-Leaders: A Competitive Advantage for Organizations. The Ken Blanchard Companies. https://resources.kenblanchard. com/whitepapers/developing-self-leaders Bryant, A., & Kazan, A. L. (2012). Self-Leadership: How to Become a More Successful, Efficient, and Effective Leader from the Inside Out (1st ed.). McGraw-Hill Education Goleman, D. (2005). Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (10th Anniversary ed.). Bantam