“My Sweet Boy” - 3rd Place - by Jenny Butterworth

MY SWEET BOY - THIRD PLACE

Jenny Butterfield*

It felt like a lifetime, I was a mom of two. Two beautiful girls who filled my heart, And made me feel the type of love I never even knew.

By some kind of miracle, I was blessed to mother three. But never could I understand, How things will really be.

Months later I had my first ultrasound, I learned I was blessed to raise a boy into a man. I knew it would be different because I only had daughters, But I also knew no matter what, I’d do the best I can.

Finally the day came and I got to see my boy, That same love I felt for my girls came rushing in. I couldn’t ease the need to want to kiss him so much. As the days and months went by, I quickly realized, He didn’t like my touch.

Long hours away from home, not seeing him all day, I’d rush back home, run through the door, but he wouldn’t even look my way.

He didn’t respond to his name, He didn’t like hide and seek. It wasn’t too long after that, I realized he couldn’t speak.

He was diagnosed with severe autism At the age of two, People say that he tested too early, But deep inside my heart I feel... like I already knew.

The worries I feel on a daily basis is on another level, What happens when I die? What happens when the person who cares for him, Doesn’t know what he wants when he cries?

You see, kids with autism prefer certain types of foods, What if he doesn’t ever speak? What if he goes hungry? Because the person that cares for him doesn’t know what he eats.

What if he wanders off, And gets lost all by himself. All alone with no words to speak, And no way to ask for help.

If all that isn’t enough to worry about, We all know that bullying is big these days. But for my boy, the “zero tolerance” won’t be the same. Because if my sweet boy comes home with a bruise, They’ll have no idea of who’s to blame.

What about his social life? What if he doesn’t make any friends? What if they just leave him alone, And he’s lonely to the end?

All those worries that I can’t help, I pray god makes a way. To protect my baby and help guide him, To always make sure that he’s okay.

I knew things would be different, To raise my sweet boy into a man. I still know that no matter what, I’ll do the best I can.