Fusion Magazine

FUSION Spring 2017

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Kent State’s LGBTQ Magazine

THIS ISSUE Women’s March Opioid Epidemic

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Why Police Brutality is an LGBTQ Issue

FUSION || Spring 2017

Table of Contents

TABLE OF CONTENTS p06

Disclaimer The cover of this issue is not meant to perpetuate any negative racial stereotypes, but also not to whitewash the reality of racial profiling and police brutality. We hope that our intent is clear.

A BRIEF HISTORY OF CONSERVATIVE POTTY TALK

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THE ELECTION’S EFFECTS ON RELATIONSHIPS

Politicizing restroom use didn’t start with North Carolina.

Divisive politics caused tension between LGBTQ students, their friends and families.

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MOONLIGHT: MORE THAN A MOVIE

WHY POLICE BRUTALITY IS AN LGBTQ ISSUE

Three Kent State students on media representation of the black LGBTQ community.

An intersection of homelessness and criminalized existence.

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HE IDENTIFIES AS A JOURNALIST

GENDER-NEUTRAL PRONOUNS ACROSS LANGUAGES

Language shapes perception and societal perceptions of trans people only recently began to improve.

A look at the ways languages have embraced gender-neutral pronouns.

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LGBTQ PEOPLE AND THE OPIOID CRISIS

THE PSYCHOLOGY OF REPRESSED MALE HOMOSEXUALITY

LGBTQ people face high rates of drug addiction while Ohio’s overdose crisis continues.

Hyper-masculinity, homophobia and projection.

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TO BIND OR NOT TO BIND

TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS IN THE COMMUNITY

A non-binary perspective on binding and the safest ways to do it.

An exploration of toxic relationships through the experiences of Kent State students.

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WOMEN’S MARCH

Masses of feminist, racial justice and LGBTQ rights advocates marched in Washington and elsewhere.

A CONVERSATION WITH AIDS EPIDEMIC SURVIVOR

After living through the AIDS epidemic of the 1980s, a former activist tells his story.

Fusion Staff

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FROM THE EDITORS Dear reader, MJ Eckhouse Editor in chief

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room that was 2016. It was hardly a good or easy year for anyone who’s not a straight cis white person of moderate wealth. It’s not even just the Trump of it all but the emboldened lawmakers and private citizens who question the validity of marginalized people’s perspectives, including those of LGBTQ people. For many, the importance of journalism rose to the forefront. For us, the importance of LGBTQ journalism couldn’t be clearer.

Ella Abbott Managing Editor

This year, we sought to refine our journalistic craft as we watched the legitimacy of reporting come into question. At Fusion, we know that journalists give a voice to marginalized people and by doing so, we share the truth and promote differing perspectives. We hope this issue demonstrates that mission.

Our staff worked extremely hard this year to broaden the range of topics we discuss. With their help, we aimed to illuminate ideas which we feel warrant more attention. We’re proud of this issue and we couldn’t have done it without them.

Over the summer, somebody left a copy of Fusion’s 2016 issue draped over the handrail in a genderneutral restroom. We’re so glad that you’re reading our magazine and we hope you enjoy it. You, the readers, of course are the ones for whom we owe a great deal of gratitude and diligence. From the bottoms (or tops?) of our hearts, we thank you.

Hopefully someday, LGBTQ perspectives will be near-universally regarded as legitimate. Until then, we’ll keep up the good fight for truth and equality. Thank you for being a part of it.

Love and respect, MJ and Ella

FUSION || Spring 2017

FUSION Spring 2017 Staff

Staff

EDITORS MJ Eckhouse Junior, Political science

Ella Abbott Sophomore, Journalism

WRITERS Connor Brennan Senior, English

Sylvia Clark Junior,English

Willemina Davidson Senior, Bachelor of Integrative Studies

Tyler Haughn Junior, Journalism

Jillian Holness Junior, Journalism

Jordin Manning Sophomore, Zoology

Saxen MJ Graduate student, Criminology PHOTOGRAPHERS Carlyle Addy Junior, Journalism

Alyssa Keown Senior, Photojournalism

Sarah Pompeii Senior, Photojournalism

Anu Sharma Sophomore, Journalism

Vinnie Tharnish Sophomore, Fashion design

Kayla Todd Senior, Public relations

Sam Verbulecz Alumnus, Photojournalism ART DIRECTOR

ILLUSTRATOR

Mike Kiczek Senior, Visual communication design

Alexis Scranton Junior, Visual communication design

MARKETER Abby Winternitz Junior, Public relations FACULTY Bruce Zake Fusion Adviser

Kevin Dilley Tami Cindea Bongiorni Director of Student Media Advertising Manager

Katie Barnes Evans Media Specialist

Norma Young Business Manager

To advertise with us contact: ads@ksustudentmedia.com

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A BRIEF HISTORY OF CONSERVATIVE POTTY TALK

A timeline of why trans people are not a threat to bathroom safety.

Story by: Tyler Haughn, Ella Abbott and MJ Eckhouse

1887

First US law requiring sex segregated public restrooms.

1920 Majority of US state laws required sex-segregated restrooms.

1954-1960

Civil rights movement opponents claimed racially integrated restrooms would cause white women to catch sexuallytransmitted diseases.

1972

Critics of the Equal Rights Amendment for women’s equality claimed it would allow men into women’s restrooms.

FUSION || Spring 2017

A brief history of conservative potty talk

“ It’s just another campaign of bigotry and misinformation. ” The right of bathroom usage emerged into the American spotlight after North Carolina enacted the infamous HB2 law in March of 2016. The law requires all government agencies, public schools and state college campuses to restrict trans people’s bathroom usage.

government officials. So far, 19 states grant nondiscrimination protections for trans people in public accommodations. Those states reported no increase of threats to public safety. Historically, framing civil rights battles around “bathroom issues” is not new. It’s just another campaign of bigotry and misinformation.

Opponents of transgender individuals’ rights claim, without any evidence, that sexual predators may exploit anti-discrimination laws and sneak into women’s restrooms by posing as transgender.

This notion has been repeatedly debunked by experts and

1980

During the AIDS epidemic, straight men feared catching HIV from sharing restrooms with gay men.

2013

Arizona lawmaker introduced a bill to discriminate against trans people’s restroom use.

February, 2017 1993

Minnesota passes first law prohibiting discrimination against trans people in public accommodations

March 2016

North Carolina passed “HB2,” which requires trans people to use the restrooms corresponding with the gender listed on their birth certificate.

Trump administration rescinds Title IX protections for trans students

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MOONLIGHT: MORE THAN A MOVIE Moonlight’s Importance for Representation Story by: Jillian Holness Photo by: Carlyle Addy and Sam Verbulecz

FUSION || Spring 2017

Moonlight: more than a movie

On February 26, Moonlight made history as the first LGBTQ film, and the first all-black casted film, to win an Oscar. The cast was primarily African American, making 2017’s Oscars less #OscarsSoWhite. Additionally, Mahershala Ali, who played Juan in the film, was the first Muslim actor to win an Oscar.

Moonlight’s triumph demonstrates that society is starting to listen to the voices of people who were long cast aside and considered “other” because they didn’t fit the unspoken expectation of whiteness.

bullying and he survives by hiding his sexuality and developing a tough exterior. His mother’s addiction worsens. Meanwhile, Kevin and Chiron’s relationship deepens and they explore physical intimacy for the first time.

Moonlight tells the protagonist’s journey in three stages.

Finally, after a sentence in juvenile hall, Chiron lives in Atlanta, where he follows in Juan’s footsteps selling drugs. He returns to Miami to visit his mother, who lives in an addiction treatment facility. While there, he also reunites with Kevin. They discuss their history and come to terms with their feelings for each other.

Viewers meet Chiron in stage one where he is nicknamed “Little” for his size and shy personality. Chiron is lonely and withdrawn at school, making him a target for his classmates’ aggressions. Escaping harassment and his mother’s abuse, Chiron finds refuge in the home of a local drug dealer, Juan, and his girlfriend, Teresa. He also finds companionship in a Cuban-American boy named Kevin.

As a teenager, Chiron continues to endure

Nico Rushh

Nico Rushh, a sophomore philosophy and psychology student explained how his family and peers reacted after he came out as queer at age 12.

“My father specifically told me ‘you were supposed to reproduce and have children with my last name’ because apparently, I’m the last one in the lineage,” he says. “He took it really hard and we don’t talk anymore for a lot of reasons but that was the all in all, we’re done.”

Rushh’s mother also struggled with accepting the news because she comes from a religious background and her views contributed to the strain on their relationship. Today, their relationship is in a better place.

“I told her I was confused about my sexuality, and I liked boys and girls,” Rushh explains. “I offered to do conversion therapy, but me and my mom said it didn’t work and we gave up on it.”

However, some of Rushh’s family reacted differently.

“The first person I told was my stepsister.

Chiron’s story is not exclusive to the film.

Rather, it reflects the experiences of many young black men, growing up in communities where the expectations to “man up” compound the burden of struggling with their sexualities.

She was like, ‘I already knew that, I’ve been waiting,’” he says.

In Moonlight, Chiron is bullied during his teenage years. Similarly, as a biracial, AfroLatino man, Rushh experienced both racism and homophobia.

Growing up, Rushh attended majority-black schools which allowed him to fit in because of his race. He said it was his sexuality that made him stand out.

“Ninth grade was the worst year of my life. I was told to kill myself twice in the same day, in the same period,” Rushh recalls. “I also got the Spanish side of it. People would call me names in Spanish. I understand Spanish and I’m just sitting there like, ‘So, y’all know I understand y’all and y’all are assholes, right?’”

After he transferred to a private school with only five people of color, Rushh faced a different dynamic.

“I think there were like two black kids and three Hispanic kids. People were stereotyping but it

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wasn’t damaging,” Rush says. “It was like, ‘Oh, you don’t do this?’ No, just because I’m gay and I’m black doesn’t mean I do anything.”

“Usually you see gay black men acting really flamboyant or you’ll see them talking about AIDS,” Rushh explains.

Rushh said queer black men are often depicted in the media as either a stereotype or a disease.

However, Rushh believes Moonlight portrays queer black men in a positive light and accurately captures many of their experiences.

Manny Jackson Other viewers agreed and identified with Chiron’s on-screen experience, including Manny Jackson, a junior majoring in public relations.

“No matter how alone I feel in my struggles, there are people out there rooting for me, who love me unconditionally, who are going through the same things I can connect and relate to,” Jackson says.

He believes the film accurately portrays the experiences of black queer youth.

“It really describes and tells the pain we go through, the moments of joy through the characters Chiron came in contact with,” Jackson explains.

Like Chiron and Rushh, Jackson also faced bullying growing up. He continues to deal with discrimination due to the double stigma of being both black and queer.

“When I was younger and coming to terms with my sexuality, people could tell I was ‘different.’ I was more feminine than other boys,” Jackson recalls. “I almost got into a couple of altercations with people, just feelings of hatred directed towards me. It’s just really disheartening to see so much hurt in my life.”

“To be pro-black, I

believe you must be for the liberation and equality of all black people.”

Jackson describes himself as a free spirit. He learned to accept himself and doesn’t feel he

needs to tell people he is bisexual.

“I haven’t had the whole coming out process.

My family in every sense is still not aware of my sexuality. I don’t see the need to have a big reveal party, nothing crazy like that,” he explains.

He doesn’t intend to lie to his parents if they ask him in the future, though.

“I treat it like it’s just me being who I am. My straight counterparts don’t have to tell people they’re straight. Why should I have that pressure on me?”

Besides being free spirited, Jackson also describes himself as a pro-black intersectional feminist. He says being pro-black means extending rights not just for heterosexual, cisgender people.

“To be pro-black, I believe you must be for the liberation and equality of all black people,” he says. “If we’re to call each other our brothers and sisters, we need to act in such a manner.

Misogyny within the black community is really disheartening because as a community, we should be very loving of each other since the world is already against us.”

FUSION || Spring 2017

Moonlight: more than a movie

“ No matter how alone I feel in my struggles, there are people out there rooting for me. ” Jaynell Nicholson Junior conservation biology student, Jaynell Nicholson, alludes to gender disparities while describing her experience as a bisexual black woman.

“When people look at me, they see a black woman. I’m usually pretty feminine presenting, so you don’t get to see my queerness unless you see me with a girl,” explains Nicholson.

Nicholson says her bisexuality offers a unique intersectional perspective.

“Some people call it part time gay or half gay, but it’s kind of cool to have the perspective of someone who has been with a man and with a woman, to see the straight and queer side.”

Nicholson explains the stereotypes that bisexual people encounter.

“Bisexual people are seen as more promiscuous because you’re attracted to more genders.”

Chiron’s character faces opposite stereotypes throughout the film. First, young Chiron’s male peers label him stereotypically effeminate. Later, adult Chiron is forced to perform the stereotype of being hard and tough, so he can survive as a drug dealer.

last September.

“I used to think everyone had a girl crush and everyone feels like this sometimes. Even though I did like this person, [I thought] I’m still going to marry a man and have kids,” Nicholson says. “The past twelve months have been a real growth time for me and finding who I am.”

Nicholson says now that she’s in a relationship with a woman, her views on eventual marriage have changed.

“I’m not really closed off into marrying a man or a woman. It’s equal for me.”

She believes she has a duty to educate people about intersectional experiences, such as those of black bisexual women.

“I think within the black community, there is still stigma between black queer people,” she says.

Moonlight released amidst news stories showing the United States regularly treating young black men as disposable. In contrast, the film cherishes black men, allows them to be vulnerable and develop close bonds with other men. Most importantly, it shows them as who they are: human.

Nicholson adds that bisexual men receive more hatred from straight men than bisexual women do.

“A lot of guys want the woman they’re with to be into girls, like some type of sexual fantasy,” she says.

Nicholson had a few experiences with women before getting into her first serious relationship,

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FUSION || Spring 2017

He identifies as a journalist

HE IDENTIFIES AS A JOURNALIST Language’s Importance in Discussing Trans People Story by: MJ Eckhouse Illustration by: Mike Kiczek

In his iconic dystopian novel, 1984, George Orwell describes how language influences perception and reality. The protagonist works for the totalitarian government, purging words from the language, which prevents citizens from expressing certain ideas. That’s how it felt before I found the language to articulate the fact that I’m a transgender man.

Of those who understand the power of language and word choice, journalists rank high on the list. Journalists learn to write clearly and accurately while avoiding bias. However, some biases are so ingrained within society that nearly everyone, including journalists, fail to realize their impact or even their existence.

The language used to discuss transgender people is a clear example. Many common terms imply that trans people are not actually our respective genders, that we are deceiving others by pretending to be something we’re not. Especially when publicized by reporting, these terms harm trans people by perpetuating the falsehood that we are delusional or deceptive.

“Gender Identity” The phrase, “gender identity” is redundant because gender is a part of identity. Cisgender journalists often write statements like, “MJ identifies as male,” whereas if I were cis they would write simply, “MJ is male.”

Trans activist Asher Bauer writes in an essay titled Not Your Mom’s Trans 101, “self-identifying is the only meaningful way to determine gender.” Bauer continues, explaining that everybody self-identifies, “If you answer the question, ‘are you a man or woman’ with ‘yes’ [or ‘no’], you have just self-identified.”

Bauer adds that cis people don’t consider their genders to be “self-identified,” they consider them “self-evident.”

That’s transphobic. Although gender is an aspect of a person’s identity, there is no reason to say “gender identity” only when referring to trans people. Doing so suggests that trans people’s genders are less real and valid than cis people’s.

A simple example: “Jane is a woman and her gender is female.”

This is more succinct, accurate and respectful than “Jane identifies as a woman and her gender identity is female.”

Saying, “He identifies as male,” leaves the sinister implication, “but he’s actually not.”

“Biologically” or “Born Male/Female” Describing a trans woman as “born or biologically male,” or a trans man as “born or biologically female” is just another way to misgender trans people. Misgendering trans people is extremely disrespectful as well as incorrect.

In a 2014 TV interview, trans actress Laverne Cox interjected to correct CBS host Gayle King, when she described Cox as “born male.” Cox replied, “I was assigned male at birth, is the way I like to put it, because I think we’re born who we are and the gender

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thing is something someone imposes on you.

And so, I was assigned male at birth but I always felt like I was a girl.”

The distinction between “born/biologically” and “assigned at birth” may seem trivial, but it’s important. The phrase “assigned at birth” acknowledges that our society assigns genders to infants based on the appearance of the infants’ genitals. Since gender is a part of people’s personalities, and infants have not yet developed personalities, it’s clear that infants are not born with genders. Rather, adults assign genders to infants.

Some may balk at this, claiming something about “biology,” “chromosomes” or “reproductive organs.” Well-meaning people often differentiate between “gender” and “sex,” to simplify trans existence so cis people can understand it more easily. They might say, “gender is the brain, sex is between the legs.”

However, the reality isn’t that simple.

Intersex people are born with physical traits commonly associated with both men and women. Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) increases testosterone levels in cisgender women, which can cause facial hair to appear.

Hormone levels (which determine gendered traits) can vary due to injury, genetics, illness and age. Human bodies are fragile and changeable, so it’s flawed and reductive to view them as the means of determining an aspect of personality, like gender.

“Misgendering

a person’s body sends the message, ‘I don’t believe you and I refuse to respect you.’”

And of course, body parts are not inherently gendered. A penis is not inherently “male,” and a vagina is not inherently “female.” Last year, Target stopped categorizing kids’ toys by gender.

Rather than assigning dolls for girls and trucks for boys, Target acknowledged that any toy can be for any child. Physical traits are no different.

Facial hair is only masculine because people say it is. But in reality, primary and secondary sex characteristics occur in people of all genders.

Describing people’s body parts as “male anatomy” or “lady parts” denies trans people the autonomy to describe our own experience.

It tells trans people “I know your body better than you do.” Like using incorrect names or pronouns, misgendering a person’s body sends

the message, “I don’t believe you and I refuse to respect you.”

A trans person’s body parts belong to that person. So, if a man has a vagina, then his vagina is male genitals because they are genitals which belong to a male. If a woman has a penis and testicles, then those are her lady parts because they belong to a lady. A non-binary person’s reproductive organs are also non-binary.

Of course, people may choose to describe themselves and their bodies however they please. The point is, it’s up to each trans person to make their own decision.

Birth Names and Pronouns Including a trans person’s birth name in reporting or repeating it to someone is nearly always unnecessary. Using trans people’s birth names, even in a past tense like “John used to be Jane,” implies that birth names are “real names,” which is untrue. Sharing a trans person’s birth name isn’t just irrelevant information, it’s also offensive.

Local media outlets often write about trans people using incorrect pronouns and birth names. This is particularly insulting and tragic when the article is about a transgender murder victim.

Many trans people were never our assigned birth names and genders. So, even when writing or speaking about them before they came out, it’s best to refrain from retroactively misgendering them or using their birth names.

“That Transgender Transgendered” and Other Grammar Errors “Transgender” is an adjective, not a verb or a noun. “Transgender” is correct, “transgendered” is incorrect. “Transgender person” is correct, “A transgender” is incorrect.

Last year, the Washington Post began using the singular form of the pronoun, “they,” to refer to non-binary people who use that pronoun for themselves. Although some people claim “they”

FUSION || Spring 2017

He identifies as a journalist

must only be plural, it’s rude and inaccurate to use “he” or “she” pronouns when referring to someone who uses “they/them” pronouns. Plus, the claim that “they” only refers to plural nouns is simply wrong. Informally, people regularly use the singular “they” when they don’t know or assume the subject’s gender. For example: Person A: “Somebody called for you earlier.”

Person B: “What did they want?”

It’s not difficult nor grammatically incorrect to use the singular “they” when writing or speaking about non-binary people. We do it all the time.

Professional Organizations Taking Note Professional associations have recognized the importance of accurate and respectful reporting about transgender people. GLAAD, the National Lesbian & Gay Journalists Association, Media Matters for America and the Associated Press have developed and published guidelines for writing about trans people.

Media Matters’ guidelines go beyond outlining appropriate terminology. Their 2016 article titled The Do’s And Don’ts On Reporting On Anti-Bullying And Nondiscrimination Protections For LGBT Students, explains that reporters should avoid uncritically repeating false, fear-mongering myths about nondiscrimination policies, focusing on medical issues of transition, asking inappropriate questions about trans people’s bodies and relying on cisgender perspectives about transgender issues.

Although national news organizations are catching up, many local publications still fail to report about trans people with accuracy and respect. In October 2016, the Akron Beacon

Journal published an article which claimed a transgender girl was “born a boy,” and included poll results about trans people’s restroom usage instead of including the evidence showing that nondiscrimination protections for trans people do not increase threats to public safety.

Why It Matters This isn’t an issue of so-called “political correctness.”

In the first 11 months of 2016, there were 26 trans people reported killed, more than any previous year. Cis men killed trans women upon realizing they were trans or after having sex with them, projecting their own self-loathing onto the women. This self-loathing can stem from a misconception that they are gay, because they felt attracted to a woman they view as “actually male.” So, when journalists and others spread the notion that women are male because they’re trans, they perpetuate the incorrect ideas behind these acts of violence.

While the causes behind transphobic violence certainly aren’t limited to reporters misgendering trans people, journalism still influences perception. If cis men didn’t perceive trans women as male, they may refrain from killing them for being trans. If politicians didn’t know their constituents perceive trans people as deceptive sinners, then they wouldn’t propose “bathroom bills” which waste time and money, dissuade businesses from creating jobs in those states and cause trans students to get urinary tract infections from avoiding the restroom all day. Although word choice in journalism isn’t the only factor in transphobic violence and discrimination, it is an important one.

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DISPROPORTIONATE RISK LGBTQ People and the Opioid Crisis Story by: Connor Brennan Photos by: Vinnie Tharnish and Michael Chritton

Ohio’s opioid epidemic has made national headlines due to its horrific potency. In 2014, Ohio led the nation in overdose deaths and the rates have remained high since. Currently, the number of overdose deaths exceed the state’s capacity of morgue space.

The epidemic’s impacts are far-reaching and addiction doesn’t discriminate. However, the LGBTQ community is at particularly high risk for substance abuse.

Trauma is a powerful, recurring reason why LGBTQ individuals turn to substance abuse.

Maureen A. Keating, a chemical dependency counselor at Kent State University explains how trauma pushes people toward addiction.

Keating noted that 80-90 percent of addiction victims have a background of trauma. She elaborated, “There’s a spectrum with addiction. You have people who are in early addiction, and they might have a mild addiction, versus people who are instated, really chronic addiction. When you get down to this end of the spectrum, most people are traumatized. The folks that can get into recovery easily, with family support or

A.A., those folks might not be as traumatized.

But those folks on the other end…in residential treatment, I’ve never seen one person who wasn’t traumatized.”

Trauma isn’t uncommon for LGBTQ people.

Violent attacks or family rejection can easily leave mental scars.

However, family acceptance doesn’t necessarily prevent addiction. The parents of Will Chritton, a former Kent student who died of a heroin overdose in December, accepted their son’s sexuality. But as his father, Michael Chritton explained, opioids prescribed for pain management led Will on a “downward spiral” into addiction.

“He was a wonderful guy and a tortured soul,” said Michael.

He explained that he and his wife figured Will was gay from a young age and that when he came out to them, it was a non-issue. However, some of Will’s friends’ parents didn’t accept their gay children, which made him feel understandably nervous.

“Trying to pass for straight or play straight

FUSION || Spring 2017

Dispropotionate risk

took a toll on him,” Michael explained. “All through his life I was pissed off because I felt like people picked on him because he was different.”

Addiction Center, an informational website, states that LGBTQ people are 9.5 times likelier than heterosexuals to become addicted to heroin.

Sean Cleland, a former Kent State student and ally of the LGBTQ community, noted that being abandoned is a major traumatic factor that easily leads to drug addiction.

“I think that any form of disconnectedness [...] the idea of cognitive dissonance between people’s acceptance of fact, and our perception. I think we want our families to love us, our families to tell us they love us, and sometimes the perceptions and the feelings of how we feel treated by people, I believe that can cause a lot of trauma. And there’s direct correlation between trauma and drug addiction.”

Another traumatic factor that can lead to drug addiction, especially among LGBTQ youth, is homelessness. According to research by The Williams Institute of the UCLA School of Law, 40

percent of homeless youth are LGBTQ. The research notes that this family abuse and rejection are causes of this homelessness.

Keating noted that LGBTQ youth dealing with homelessness thus lack a sense of belonging.

“Homelessness is a huge traumatic experience. People who are homeless live in a state of anxiety, trying to scrounge for a meal, trying to do what they need to do. […] we’ve seen a lot of homeless kids who are from those communities. Because their families disown them. That’s definitely a factor. It’s been my experience, I’ve never had a person who’s had an addictive thing going on that hasn’t said ‘I didn’t feel like I belonged.’”

Keating continued, explaining that dissonance and feelings of abandonment cause LGBTQ youth to seek acceptance elsewhere.

Drugs such as heroin can be a swift choice, especially when they’re easily accessible. According to Keating, heroin gives the user a warm sensation that could feel like a replacement for the love their family and friends deny them.

Miles Ehrman, a trans man and Kent native, shared about his former struggles with drug addiction. Now, he uses his recovery experience to help others by working at a treatment center. He explained why LGBTQ youth use drugs such as heroin to

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escape their shame.

“Substance abuse is one of the most common ways that individuals in the LGBTQ community deal with that shame, that anger, that fear at themselves.”

Will Chritton

Rejection can be especially prevalent for trans people.

“Not until fairly recently have I felt that acceptance. Within the last four or so years, before that, I was in a state of denial. I wasn’t the kind of person that anybody wanted to be around, I didn’t want to be around me. It was easier for me to hide in my use of drugs and alcohol,” Ehrman explains.

Ehrman explained that stigma is another major factor in addiction within the LGBTQ community. This stigma seems to be influenced by fear of AIDS, which, according to Ehrman, recently made a disturbing return.

“There is a resurgence of the HIV/AIDS issues coming about, especially with the extreme uptake in IV heroin overuse. And it’s not just in the LGBT community, it’s everyone. Since there’s so many more people who are using IV drugs, it’s spreading at a really quick rate. And the thing is, people don’t know, so they won’t say something. So, it’ll get passed along, and it’s even more prevalent in the LGBT community, because of that stigma with HIV and AIDS, and with substance abuse itself so they kind of go hand in hand, and they end up causing a whole lot more problems for the community.”

Ehrman discussed the challenges trans people face at rehab centers, both as employees and clients.

“Things are changing, they’re changing slowly, but they’re changing, and that’s what we need to be proud of. In the agency that I work for, I am the only openly transgender employee. That’s breaking a lot of boundaries, and it’s changing a lot of things. It’s teaching my agency not only how to have a transgender employee, but how to have a transgender client. That’s one of the things that this field really needs to know, is how do we have clients who are gay who are in

residential treatment, how do we have clients who are transgender in residential treatment?”

He explained.

Inpatient rehabs are often marginalizing and unsafe for trans people since they are segregated by gender. Concerns about treatment providers lacking empathy or cultural competence can prevent people from asking for help, even when they know that they need it. Ehrman says that whether LGBTQ addiction victims can find knowledgeable providers largely depends on the person’s location.

“If we have a trans woman come to treatment, it’s very likely that the judge isn’t going to understand. Especially if she’s court ordered, it’s not likely that the judge is going to understand, and send her to our women’s facility. That judge will send her to our men’s facility, and that’s where I step in. That’s when I say, ‘now hold on a second here, this is something that we need to look at.’ So, it’s changing very slowly, but it will change. […] Equality is slow, but it’s getting there.”

A major question arises regarding government response to the opioid epidemic.

“No one has [done enough]. City government, state government, counties, no one has. No one knows what to do. Heroin is killing people at such a high rate that all they can do at this point is bury the bodies and pray,” Ehrman said.

However, Ehrman believes that the CARA Act (Comprehensive Addiction and Recovery Act) will help. The act, which President Obama signed into law, increases funding for addiction treatment.

Progress can be frighteningly slow. Both for Ohio’s opioid crisis and LGBTQ equality, people can maintain hope but must keep fighting to survive.

FUSION || Spring 2017

To bind or not to bind

TO BIND OR NOT TO BIND

A non-binary perspective on binding and the safest ways to do it

Story by: Saxen MJ Photos by: Sarah Pompeii

To bind or not to bind? If you are anything like me, you have asked this question more times than you probably care to admit. You may have asked yourself every day when you’ve woken up. You’ve probably asked a medical professional, googled it, and asked fellow trans, nonbinary or gender non-conforming people what they think about it as well.

It’s strange, we do these things because part of us feels like we must. On the days when we don’t do it, we feel not so whole, or like we have not been as true to ourselves as we could be. But binding can be uncomfortable, it can be inconvenient and it has probably been, if you have been doing it a long time, even painful. But as the old saying goes, “we do what we gotta do.” But let me back up. Many of you may be asking yourselves, “what is binding,” or “why would anyone do that?” So, let’s answer these questions quickly, before diving deeper into the question of whether to bind at all.

Binding is the act of making one’s chest appear flat, and for some that’s by any means necessary. It’s a common practice for many trans men and trans-masculine or non-binary people. In the past, the only option for chest compression were just Ace bandages or duct tape. Now, trans people warn each other that those binding methods can damage the body.

But those desperate to relieve the dysphoria associated with their chests have sometimes been willing to risk physical and medical issues to achieve the flat chest they need. That’s when some cool companies got involved and started

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“ Binding makes me feel at home in my body. ” producing safe binders that could relieve chest dysphoria for a relatively low price, and save many the medical costs due to problems caused

by Ace bandage or duct tape binding.

Many of you may be reading this, thinking, “that’s crazy, why would anyone put themselves through that, especially before safe binders were available?” Well, let me reassure you that it’s not crazy. It’s just doing what one needs to do to feel comfortable and at home in the only body they have. Sometimes body modifications like binding are necessary.

“Sometimes body modifications like binding are necessary.”

Don’t get me wrong, binding is a pain and all the effort can feel like a drag. Luckily, there are many companies that help make this process easier. But binding is still uncomfortable and there are still constraints, such as how long binders ought to be worn and how tight they are on the chest. Binders are constrictive, but not

dangerously so, and they can be a major pain to put on and take off. Some roll up under your shirt, some are hot and make you sweat, and others feel kind of like a tight sports bra. People have complained that they leave slight rashes and are not comfortable to do things like swim in. Sometimes we must wear layers to hide the outline of our binder under our shirts, (great in winter, not so much in summer). But with all of binding’s cons, there is one pro that outweighs it all: The simple fact that this body of mine feels more complete when I look down and see a flat chest. That’s the chest I see when I close my eyes and envision myself. Binding makes me feel at home in my body.

The question posed was simple, right? To bind or not to bind? So, let’s look at a few things.

Binding is wholly personal, from the initial decision to bind, to where to get a binder.

Plus, we must confront what happens when

FUSION || Spring 2017

To bind or not to bind

we wear them. Sometimes people recognize us as our actual genders, sometimes they don’t.

Some people may be curious, others may be judgmental. Binding is a personal journey and one that requires brave and honest exploration of one’s body and self.

But to put your fears to rest, if you fantasize about the day you will have a flat chest or have wished for a flat chest, chances are binding may be a fantastic option for you. No one should feel like their body is foreign or alien to them, but activities like clothes shopping, going swimming or tanning, getting fitted for a suit, going to the gym or simply taking a shower can often make trans/non-binary people feel disconnected from our bodies. If you experience these types of feelings, binding may be a good way to mitigate some of that dysphoria.

Some of you may be thinking, “do I have to be trans or non-binary to bind?” Of course not!

Remember, binding is the act of compressing one’s chest make it appear flat. Anyone can do that if they feel like their chest is too big, too heavy, causes back pain, gets in their way at the gym, hates running because of their chest, does

cosplay or just doesn’t like their chest all that much. This is a popular practice in the transmasculine community, but anyone can do it, if it helps them love themselves more and feel more confident.

Binding can help answer the nagging question, “will I ever feel comfortable with this not-so flat chest?” Guess what? For at least eight hours a day, you can. If you are wondering about where you can buy a binder I always suggest my personal favorite, the company Underworks.

Their binders are safe, affordable, come in both black and white, have various sizing options and designs and best of all, they are shipped to your door in confidential packaging, so as not to raise suspicions of those that may not be accepting.

So, if the answer to the question is emerging as a “yes,” take a deep breath and remember that you are not alone. There are affordable and safe options and people out there who will answer your questions. Happy binding!

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WOMEN’S MARCH United against President Trump in one of the largest protests in American history Story by: Ella Abbott Photos by: Joanna Levin, Andy Alex Martinez, and Julia Holmberg

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Madison Kalson protests in front of the Trump International Hotel in Washington, D.C.

On January 20, the 45th President of the United States was sworn into office to approximately 160,000 people on the National Mall. The following day, an estimated 470,000 people occupied the same space during the Women’s March on Washington.

The event, which organizers began planning following President Trump’s election, called on women - and those who care about their well-being - to take to Washington D.C. following the President’s inauguration to protest his many anti-woman policies - particularly, his party’s interest in defunding Planned Parenthood, a top provider of healthcare for women.

The volume of marchers in D.C. came from all over the country in order to rally around issues they felt were important and may be in danger of being neglected by the incoming administration.

Madison Kalson, a senior Fashion Design student at Kent State, drove from Ohio to Washington D.C. in order to participate in the march.

“I was very disappointed with the results of the election and the Women’s March seemed like a very powerful way to express my disappointment and my disapproval and to come together as a unifying group saying that we’re against a lot of the things that Trump’s platform was for,” Madison explained.

Originally, Madison had intended to attend the march in Cleveland before she and a group of friends decided to go to D.C. They left early in the morning and drove until they reached the nation’s capitol. Senior Visual Communication Design student Julia Holmberg was a part of that same group.

“I wasn’t sure how plausible it would really be to get to D.C. during school and everything and eventually I figured I just wasn’t gonna end up going,” Julia explained. “But, my fiancee and I were at Shabbat on Friday night at Hillel on campus and talked to a couple of our friends and they were kind of feeling the same way.”

Earlier in the day, those friends had made the decision to go to the march.

“So, it kind of just started from there. We made our plan and we all went together and marched together,” Julia said.

Joining the march itself was “a very unifying” experience, according to Madison, “You know, there were different groups,” she explained. “There were people [who were] pro-life, prochoice. People who have different views on immigrants or taxes or whatever, but it was kind of a very welcoming community.”

The community of the march stuck with Julia as well.

“It was just like the collective whole of everyone there for every single cause that we all care about and expressing unity through that.”

For Julia, the march wasn’t just about women’s health and the abstract concept of women’s rights, but the very real and present danger to her own rights. She recalled the night of the election as “horrible” and remembers crying a few times throughout the following day. Afterwards, she decided it was time to move her plan to propose to her girlfriend up, due to the confusion surrounding the incoming president’s plans for the protections of the LGBTQ community.

“I decided that day to buy an engagement ring and, kind of, in my own small personal way turn what I view as a tremendous tragedy for our nation into a show of strength and love and defiance against that,” Julia said.

FUSION || Spring 2017

Women’s march

The effect of last year’s election has been felt globally and the Women’s March had the same ripple effect, sparking marches not only across the United States but internationally as well.

Cities such as Paris, Nairobi, Belgrade, Johannesburg, Melbourne, Australia, London, and Vancouver (to name a few) held “sister marches” in support of equality.

Flaws within the Women’s March are hard to ignore, even for participants. As cis women’s genitalia became a rally cry of the demonstration, some trans women felt excluded, as though the movement was not for them. Many people carried Black Lives Matter signs and protested the Dakota Access Pipeline, reminding marchers that racism is also a women’s rights issue.

Marchers in Idaho, Utah and Alaska braved snow and freezing temperatures to make their positions known.

Joanna herself carried a sign to remind fellow marchers that racial inequality isn’t a thing of the past.

Locally, protestors in Cleveland were luckier with the weather as they marched at the edge of Lake Erie and into the newly constructed Public Square. The high was 64 degrees, a shock for a late January day but, according to Joanna Levin, a former Kent State student, it was “perfect weather.”

“A lot of people asked me, when I was making my posters, why I felt the need to make one about race,” she said. “If you’re gonna be mindful about one thing, you should try to be mindful about everything. And, going in, I wanted to actively be a white ally.”

Joanna attended the Cleveland march with her mother and sister, turning the march for rights into a family affair. Her mother is a librarian and her father a photographer. Her sister, Claire, works in an AmeriCorps program. Joanna says she herself has been involved with social justice and activism for as long as she can remember.

“Only because that was how we were raised and because we’ve grown up in a community that explains that more types of people make it a better community,” Joanna explained. “So, our perfect thing to do on a Saturday [...] is, you know, explaining that to people and to do some sort of act of A) civil disobedience and B) something that brings people together.”

Cleveland has become accustomed to hosting large scale events in the past year, having hosted a city-wide parade in June after the Cleveland Cavaliers won the NBA Championship and hosted the Republican National Convention in July.

She noted that it’s important to remember that 53 percent of white women voted for Donald Trump, according to the New York Times, while 94 percent of black women and 68 percent of Latina women voted for Hillary Clinton.

“A lot of people were feeling excluded and it kind of broke my heart, because this is about uniting people,” Joanna said.

Many on the right have consistently questioned whether marching and protesting is effective or if it’s kicking up a fuss with no endgame.

On this, Madison agreed that marching shouldn’t be the last step of someone’s activism, but said that the march itself was an important first step.

“I think it was again a very unifying thing, but I do think there is that disconnect between getting something done,” she said.

According to the Cleveland Police, the city’s own Women’s March brought in an approximate 15,000 people that took to the streets wielding signs. Marchers ranged from young children to older generations of women who are no strangers to marching for their rights.

When traveling in downtown Cleveland, Joanna says the best way to get around is by the city’s Rapid Transit system and she, along with her mother and sister, used this to get to the parade early on Saturday.

“The first thing I saw was, like, six or seven women that had to have been older than 60 who were wearing all pink,” Joanna recalled. “They looked like they were going to war.”

Joanna says they were amazed they had found themselves back in the position of having to protest for the protection of their rights.

After getting off the transit, they ran into the women again a few times throughout the day, which only served to make the march feel more unified.

“It was a total community environment because Cleveland feels really big sometimes and it feels really small sometimes,” Joanna said. “But, there, it didn’t matter if you knew the person or not next to you, you had a like-minded bond.”

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“There needs to be a next step of going further, making sure that people know how to reach their local government, how to make change even in their communities that can become bigger.”

Julia is in her last year of college and admits that it’s hard to find the time for consistent activism outside of being alert and informed about what is happening around her. Many people currently face this problem as they navigate balancing their activism with their personal and professional life.

“I think right now, with everything going on with my schedule, it’s hard to take concrete acts, although I do as much as I can,” Julia said. “But, to try and understand other people and how they’re feeling and what they’re doing and create more empathy within my social circles and family is my on the ground human experience.”

Joanna feels inaction can also come from the overwhelming amount of events young people are exposed to at once, especially in our current political climate.

“We hear so many call-to-actions all day long - especially now, but even before - that it’s not about laziness,” she said. “It’s about ‘I probably would do that, but there’s so much.’ And it’s not easy to wade through.”

Being overwhelmed shouldn’t mean giving up, as Julia explained.

She added that large crowds shouldn’t deter introverted people from participating.

“The tremendous amount of support and unity from a large crowd like that can be a really positive experience,” she said. “So, I would encourage people who are feeling kind of shy and uneasy about going to protests to go and be with like-minded people and find ways to be activists on the ground in their everyday lives.”

She also reminds people who are interested in activism but who don’t have the time that donating is a valid way to show your support to causes that you’re passionate about, such as Planned Parenthood, the American Civil Liberties Union and the Human Rights Campaign.

The Women’s March had a global impact that set a fire in both long-standing activists and those who are new to their causes.

It spread nationally and globally, uniting women in the fight for their own protections and rights, and sparked protests and marches that will follow it.

“There won’t be something as big as the Women’s March for a little while,” said Joanna as she contemplated the demonstrations to come over the next four years of this administration. “We were very, very inspired in that moment.”

Madison reflected on how it felt to be part of such a monumental movement and the empowerment she felt as she marched with other people who shared her own passion for the cause.

“It’s crazy, I mean I’m never gonna forget that.”

FUSION || Spring 2017

The election’s effects on relationships

THE ELECTION’S EFFECTS ON RELATIONSHIPS The Effect of Divisive Politics on Relationships Story by: Sylvia Clark Photos by: Kayla Todd

The 2016 election was a rough one for those both deeply interested in politics and those on the outskirts. It was impossible to go anywhere or talk to just about anyone without the topic of the election coming up. For many people, this led to argumentative conversations and divisions caused by party affiliations and personal beliefs.

To get a better grasp on the effect of this election, students and faculty at Kent State were interviewed.

Kat Flood, non-binary polyamorous pansexual The recent election has certainly been a dividing one among families-

KF: Shocking.

Along political lines, has it affected your personal relationships in any way?

KF: My relationship with my family has been the same, because we don’t really let that get in between us, but I did lose some friends online after the election because of obviously different political opinions, and then some nasty comments here and there. So, yeah.

Do you feel threatened by that sort of rhetoric, or talk?

KF: I personally do feel threatened by the rhetoric, just because it is honestly scary. I know that I have a lot of privilege and there are a lot of other people that definitely have a lot more to fear than myself, but I have to admit that it is scary. But I’m not going to let that rule my life anymore, like I’m not going to be afraid and not be myself.

What do you think the future of LGBTQ rights is going to look like?

KF: First of all, we have to make sure that we’re keeping gay marriage, because we have [vice-president Mike] Pence to deal with. But then continuing on with the fight of getting equal rights for all genders, for everything. Making sure that all health insurance actually does cover all transitional needs and everything else. And then making sure we don’t stop and keep going forward, because once we stop and say, “Oh, we’ve done enough,” then we’re not going to make it.

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Riley Braun, non-binary trans male, demisexual polyromantic

Jon Utz, aromantic asexual

How has the election affected your personal relationships?

Family, friends?

How has the election affected you, your family or friends?

RB: I lost a good amount of respect for family members, and also, they are not a fan of my opinions, and me talking about anything political. Because I kind of try to push and say, “this isn’t right” and “this is what is going on here” and how wrong it is or how right it is. So, I don’t think I lost any friends, really, because most of them are pretty gay and liberal. But mostly family members, it was rough. It’s been rough.

JU: It hasn’t been the best, honestly. My parents – my dad and I – disagree on quite a few things politically.

Did you already have a strained relationship with these people?

RB: With the election, it brought out more of what their principles are, and what their morals are, and what they actually think is right. They show a lot of racism, and homophobia, and transphobia, so it just kind of showed it more from what we’re used to, because it’s been talked about more in our family.

Because my family – we talk, we talk. It’s like drama. It was already somewhat strained with me being trans and in the community, but they’re more vocal about it. So that’s why it’s strained more, and people, like my family, since they’re very vocal about it, they like to shove their opinions on you, like yell, and aren’t really the best about that.

Do you live on campus or away from your family?

RB: I live on campus, and I do not enjoy going home. Not a fan.

I’m moving out in the summer to Kent, so it’s kind of like, you have me, and Kent State, and then you have them, who you kind of want to push away sometimes, but you know you shouldn’t, but I do.

Where do you think the future of LGBTQ rights is going?

RB: I think we’re just going to continue fighting and we’re going to still fight for the right to have same sex marriage, because a lot of people are afraid that’s going to be taken away. We’re going to still fight for all the rights, for equality, for us. […] But I know that no one’s going to stop, no one’s going to stop, because that’s our community.

Have you always disagreed?

JU: Yes, we’ve always disagreed on politics. We have very different opinions. He’s definitely more conservative while I’m left leaning. That’s probably an understatement, but I digress.

Has this only heightened the difficulties?

JU: Absolutely. I tend to avoid the subject of politics with my parents for this reason.

Has this affected your friends in any way? Or the way that you present yourself or talk to people?

JU: It has, especially online. I see people tearing each other apart!

Not even discourse, just full blown arguments attacking each other. I’m sitting on the sidelines watching this all go down and it’s very concerning.

Where do you think the future of LGBTQ rights is heading?

JU: I think at this point all we can do is hope for the best, and just fight back however we can. Seriously, we’re not just going to sit here and take it.

FUSION || Spring 2017

The election’s effects on relationships

Ken Ditlevson, Director of LGBTQ Student Center What are your day-to-day interactions with students like?

KD: So, the day-to-day – really, there is no day-to-day, every day is a little different, it really is one of the perks of the job, because every day is different, there’s a lot of variety. We help students feeling safe and supported at Kent State by doing trainings, though some days we’ll do safe space trainings or ally workshops with students, we sometimes work with students who are just needing referrals on what student groups we have on campus that are supportive and inclusive of LGBT. [...] We have an emergency fund that we operate through the center for when students are cut off from family support, so sometimes we’re helping students that are in crisis. We have a lot of students that come down just for the social aspect that our center offers, so we have a lounge space that’s connected with the LGBT student center. A lot of students come down just because they want to make friends, or want to get connected. [...] So, there’s a lot of variety.

How long have you been here?

KD: I’ve been here for a little over two years.

Have you seen any trends lately? I know you can only speak very generally – and I wouldn’t expect you to speak anything but generally.

We had a very divisive election that has put a strain on many people, their families, their friendships.

KD: We definitely have had a couple trends. The first trend was

right after the election the center was really swamped with people just wanting to come and vent, and express concerns. We had a lot of students who were concerned about what protections there would be going forward, just a lot of uncertainty. And a lot of students who were disappointed with the results, and in particular that the president had some stances that were not as inclusive of the LGBT community. A lot of concern of, “is marriage equality going to be taken back? Are there going to be the trans guidance offered by President Obama?” There was speculation if that was going to continue under the current administration. Unfortunately, as of last week, that was dropped.

The guidance was dropped. So, there’s still a lot of uncertainty, a lot of people just concerned with what this is going to mean for their own lives or to the lives of the people that are important to them. So, that was the big one. The other trend is that we saw a huge upswing in requests for safe space training.

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POLICE BRUTALIT and why it is an LGBTQ issue Story by: MJ Eckhouse and Saxen MJ Photo Illustrations by: Alyssa Keown and Vinnie Tharnish

LITY

In 1959, it was, in many ways, illegal to be

After purporting to check IDs, police arrested

trans or gay. Even in cities which now are well-

five people and tried to shove them all in the

known for their progressivism, law enforcement

back of a police car. Tired of such treatment

officers regularly raided gay bars. Police beat

for just existing, the LGBTQ customers

and harassed queer bar patrons and patrolled

resisted, using what was around them: coffee,

gay neighborhoods, waiting to storm into

cups, donuts, spoons, etc. Overwhelmed, the

the homes of gay couples to arrest them for

police retreated. Seven and ten years later,

engaging in consensual sex. Dancing with a

respectively, similar groups of street youth, sex

same-sex partner was illegal until the 1970s.

workers, and queer and trans people of color

Sodomy laws were not ruled unconstitutional

defended their spaces against police violence,

until 2003. Entrapment was common; police

during the Compton Cafeteria Riots and the

would pretend to cruise for gay partners, then

Stonewall Riots. The latter is often considered

arrest them when they got together. Laws

the beginning of the modern LGBTQ rights

against “crossdressing” targeted trans people.

movement.

Finally, one night in May 1959, queers fought back against this discrimination and brutality at an all-night coffee shop called Cooper’s Donuts, situated between two gay bars in Los Angeles.

So, the advances made by LGBTQ activists began with communities defending themselves against hostile police practices. That fact is rarely acknowledged in mainstream LGBTQ discourse today.

Police violence used to be a central issue within LGBTQ activism. In recent years, though, the issue was largely divorced from mainstream movements, which focused on other goals, such as marriage equality. But criminal justice and police practices remain crucial concerns to the LGBTQ community’s most vulnerable.

History of Gay Rights and Police Brutality The Stonewall Riots of 1969 are often regarded as the start of the modern gay rights movement.

Around the same time, the civil rights movement made tangible progress toward racial equality, including federal legislation prohibiting racial discrimination. Although today’s political perspectives frame racial issues and LGBTQ issues as separate, these movements were intertwined. Gay rights activists adopted tactics from civil rights leaders and many people were involved in both racial and LGBTQ justice.

Dan McCune, a survivor of the HIV/AIDS epidemic and former member of the AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power (ACT UP), explains:

“The advances

made by LGBTQ activists began with communities defending themselves against hostile police practices.”

“A lot of the people who ended up leading the gay rights movement got a lot of their training from the civil rights movement, like I did. There were a lot of people who were in the civil rights movement. If they weren’t in it, they got their idea from it. But I think Stonewall was just, ‘we’ve had enough.’ The poor bar had been raided I don’t know how many times. But how to set up protests and things came from the civil rights movement.”

McCune, like other gay rights activists, participated in Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s nonviolent civil rights training sessions.

These consisted of activists learning how to respond nonviolently to violence and antagonism when participating in a protest, march, demonstration or sit-in.

The Current Reality A 2013 Williams Institute survey found that 48 percent of LGBTQ victims of violence reportedly experienced police misconduct.

The 2015 US Transgender survey found that 58 percent of respondents who interacted with police who knew they were transgender experienced mistreatment, including verbal harassment, persistent misgendering, physical/ sexual assault and being forced to perform sexual acts to avoid arrest.

Nearly half of transgender survey respondents said they feel uncomfortable seeking police assistance.

Some people probably wouldn’t be surprised by this. Others may feel shocked or dismissive. It’s a frightening prospect to accept if you trust the police to keep people safe.

Interconnectivity and Intersectionality Today, the Black Lives Matter movement leads the national conversation about police brutality.

This is no coincidence; a study by a University of California professor found that unarmed black Americans are 3.49 times more likely to be killed by police compared to unarmed white Americans. The deaths of Trayvon Martin, Michael Brown and Tamir Rice, as well as hundreds of others ignited protests and calls for accountability. Research collaborative, Mapping Police Violence, analyses data which show that 69 percent of black people killed by police last year were allegedly unarmed and not suspected of a violent crime.

Black Lives Matter and the LGBTQ rights movement may seem unrelated. However, sociopolitical issues are all interconnected.

Discrimination and family rejection lead to poverty and impoverished people may live in heavily-policed areas or work in illegal economies to survive.

And of course, LGBTQ people aren’t all white. But even those who are should care about police accountability. When some people lack civil rights, others’ rights are threatened.

have genders and people of all races can be LGBTQ. Given the community’s inherent diversity, different populations within it face different experiences of oppression. In terms of violence and discrimination, including involvement with law enforcement, trans women of color have it harder than most.

Kimberle Crenshaw, a civil rights advocate from Canton, coined the term “intersectionality” to describe how intersecting power systems affect minorities, particularly black women. She noticed how black women were excluded from antidiscrimination efforts which were framed as either “a race issue,” excluding gender, or “a gender issue,” excluding race. These omissions and the compound discrimination black women face prompted Crenshaw to speak about intersectionality and how the most marginalized populations are often overlooked.

In the words of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., “injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”

The same holds true for LGBTQ communities. Marriage rights dominated the conversation for years, leaving poverty, discrimination and violence against trans/queer women of color “for later.” If LGBTQ communities seek to protect and increase their own civil liberties, it is in everyone’s interest to work for the rights and safety of those who most often lack it.

Although it may seem like police brutality has nothing to do with LGBTQ people, especially if they are white, the truth is not so simple. As illustrated by its rainbow symbol, “LGBTQ” is a conglomeration, not a monolith. The LGBTQ community is (excuse the wordplay) heterogenous. Some gay people are cis, some trans people are straight, some bisexual people don’t

One notable intersection lies between LGBTQ existence and homelessness. Per the True Colors Fund, “40 percent of youth experiencing homelessness identify as LGBT.” Family rejection and discrimination are both reasons behind this grim statistic.

Ohio is one of 28 states that lack a statewide law protecting LGBTQ people from housing and employment discrimination.

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Consequently, LGBTQ people are often homeless, which leads to more interactions with police.

LGBTQ Homelessness and Police Engagement The impact of police brutality on the LGBTQ community is widespread, as is homelessness among this community. Those who suffer from homelessness have a unique perspective and experience with law enforcement. Police brutality impacts the LGBTQ community in some respects that mirror the experiences of other minorities who disproportionately interact with police.

Belonging to multiple minority groups leads to increased risk for police brutality, homelessness and poverty.

A homeless, genderqueer person shared their experience with police brutality, which happened in California around 2006.

They spoke on condition of anonymity, preferring to go by the pseudonym Turtle. Throughout the conversation, Turtle paused as their voice quivered with emotion.

Where are you from?

“I’m from everywhere. I ran away when I was 16. You wake up in one city and go to sleep in a different one. After a while the cities all blend together. I was gone for eight years. When people asked, I would just say, ‘I’m from wherever you want me to be from.’”

Did being LGBTQ contribute to your running away, for instance your family’s reception of your identity?

“I had a supportive family, one that accepted me for who I was and who I loved, but I had a rough childhood. I was a latch-key child in an immigrant family. My dad was absent because of drugs and passed away when I was a young teen. I was a rebellious teenager trying to cope with and understand feelings of abandonment.”

Did you encounter homophobia and/or transphobia among other homeless people?

“Yes, my masculine presentation was an issue for some people because of machismo and importance of territory amongst homeless community members. It’s a male-dominated population. I was often perceived as a threat to heteronormativity of homeless culture.”

Did you observe that LGBTQ homeless youth were disproportionately harassed, compared to other homeless youth?

“Law enforcement sees all homeless people as the same – a kind of dirtiness that needs to be ‘cleaned up.’ I don’t think they’re quite so specific when it comes to homeless people, but they pay attention to the homeless more than anyone else because they’re

easy targets. Members of the public walk right over you like you’re invisible. They’ll walk their children across the street as though to keep them from your existence.”

What is your personal experience with law enforcement?

“I had some encounters over the years. When you live outside everything you do is in public. Imagine everything you do in your home being visible to the world, including to law enforcement.

When people have already determined that you’re lesser, you start agreeing and your concern for what other people will see you do diminishes. So, people get drunk, high or into fights, in public. Much like incarcerated people, when you’re challenged by someone else you must answer the challenge. One time, about 10 years ago, I got in a fight with someone and got arrested. I sat in jail for almost a week. After being released I left. While I was on the road, hitchhiking, I got stopped by the cops. They said I didn’t have a legal right to be there. They carded me, and I didn’t know there was a warrant for me, for failure to appear in court.”

Most street kids travel alone or with a lover, Turtle explains. But they preferred the company of their dog, Jeter.

“I had my pup with me at the time and she knew to be protective of me around cops. The cops felt threatened by the presence of a large muscular dog. They wanted to confiscate my dog, I got defensive, they got hostile, and it escalated. They threatened to take my dog from me and I refused to let go of her leash.

What ensued was the worst interaction I’ve ever had with law enforcement. I was hit, the handcuffs were too tight, and I was slammed into a police cruiser. I was kicked in the back of my legs, I was brought to my knees, and my head was slammed against the door. They threw me stomach-down into the police car with my hands cuffed behind me. They dragged my dog away. It would be eight days before my release. They never told me what happened to my dog or where I could find her. I was very lucky to recover her from another street kid who took her from the police for me after my arrest. When I arrived at the station my face, knees and arms were bruised, and the handcuffs had cut my wrists.”

Do you think things have changed for homeless LGBTQ youth since?

“The next time you are out and you see someone flying a sign – pan handling – or asleep on a bench, or begging for food, look around. Watch people look through them. Notice how they don’t see or hear the pleas for leftovers or change. The next time you see the police interacting with a homeless person, watch their body language. Watch the way they can stand over them. Then ask yourself if things have changed. I think you’ll know for yourself.”

Do you think your experience is common for LGBTQ homeless youth?

“Yes. You’re perceived as a lesser, an ‘other,’ a punk, as someone deserving the unfortunate circumstances you find yourself in.

Police brutality

FUSION || Spring 2017

“ I was often perceived as a threat to

heteronormativity of homeless culture.

Law enforcement tend to adhere to a rather conservative viewpoint. And, generally, there’s a lack of sensitivity training – especially regarding minority groups. Living on the street is dangerous – you’re hypervigilant. Law enforcement fails to take that into consideration. They have all the power and they’re treating disempowered people as threats.”

How does it feel for you, knowing that people will be reading about your experiences?

“It is strange. It is personal. I’m sure some people will be dismissive, but I think it’s important because my story isn’t unique.

People need to know that. Maybe someone who reads my story will see someone with a mohawk and a Grateful Dead shirt flying a sign, and they won’t step over them. Maybe a cop will read it and remember it on their next call with a homeless kid.”

“Some realities are

hard to face and it’s a frightening prospect to accept, if you believe the police solely or primarily keep people safe.”

Why This Still Happens The 2013 Williams Institute report states that greater amounts of LGBTQ police officers would help reduce police bias and violence against LGBTQ communities. Some police departments have taken steps to improve relations with LGBTQ communities. Akron Police Department has an LGBT Liaison position, currently filled

by Lt. Cynthia Christman, who did not immediately respond to request for comment.

However, internal bias and discrimination often dissuades LGBTQ officers from coming out,

”

staying on the force or becoming police officers in the first place.

The Williams Institute report lists over 50 legal disputes involving discriminatory treatment of LGBTQ law enforcement personnel by other police personnel. These cases include allegations of constant verbal harassment, use of homophobic slurs, ignoring requests for backup, comparing gay officers to pedophiles and other insinuations associating homosexuality with criminality, intentional use of incorrect pronouns for transgender officers, sexual harassment, sexual assault, removal from patrol work and paid administrative leave and retaliation for standing up against this discriminatory treatment.

When police officers turn a blind eye towards their fellow officers’ misconduct, who is left to enforce the law and hold them accountable?

In 2000, Robert Boevingloh, a gay 61-year-old Vietnam veteran, was arrested in St. Louis, MO. An Amnesty International article described the arrest as entrapment. Boevingloh was charged with “lewd and lascivious” conduct. He was found guilty and sentenced to two years of probation.

“Before all this, I had only good feelings about cops. My own brother was a police officer killed in the line of duty. But now? If this is the justice system in America, it’s broken.”

Boevingloh said.

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THE DEVELOPMENT OF GENDER-NEUTRAL PRONOUNS In various languages Story by: Willemina Davidson Illustration by: Alexis Scranton

In 2015, the American Dialect Society declared singular “they” its Word of the Year, beating out the phrase, “thanks, Obama.” They cited the word’s growing social importance and its adoption by publications such as the Washington Post. Uses of singular they date to the early days of English’s development. Contrary to some claims, it is completely grammatically acceptable. While English has long had a gender-neutral pronoun, many other languages still lack their widely-accepted usage. To address this, language academies around the world are now grappling with creating an equivalent. The most publicized result is the Swedish word “hen”, a gender-neutral pronoun, which slowly gained prominence over the last century.

Understanding the situation’s complexity requires looking at the concept of grammatical gender and how it maps onto different languages. For instance, English has lost grammatical gender aside from its pronouns. These include: “she,” “he,” “they” and “it.” Other languages, such as Spanish and Arabic, differ in that they have feminine and masculine cases which apply to all

nouns. Some languages, like Hebrew, even have gendered verbs.

This strict classification system means that “door” is feminine in German and Spanish, but masculine in Hebrew and Arabic.

Some languages have a gender-neutral case, such as German es and English it, but these pronouns usually don’t refer to people.

However, some languages don’t have gendered pronouns at all, so grammatical context clues are used to determine the speaker’s gender.

In the U.S., English is the dominant, but not official, language.

An ever-growing population speaks Spanish, but the white, English-speaking segment of the queer community may overlook this linguistic diversity. Some of the community’s leaders, such as Sylvia Rivera and Gloria Anzaldua, were Latinx, yet history glosses over their language use, treating it like an inconvenience.

Here is a list of languages that have begun to develop and use gender-neutral pronouns. Many of these languages are still figuring out which pronoun, if any, will arise, but maybe you can make Kent a voice in the discussion.

FUSION || Spring 2017

The development of gender-neutral pronouns

Spanish

Arabic

Spanish pronouns vary between different locations. Now that trans communities are organizing for change, there are even more gender-neutral options. Two popular adaptions are the use of “@” or “x” to indicate the inclusion of all genders. For example: Latin@ and Latinx. While there is the gender-neutral pronoun ello, it’s primarily used in the same way as it in English and similarly considered offensive. Consequently, the Chilean non-binary community combined the feminine ella and the masculine él to develop a new pronoun, elle. The ending -e indicates the gender, or lack thereof, for nouns.

Modern Standard Arabic is a direct descendant of the Classical Arabic which was used to write the Quran. This means Arabic inherited the binary gender system, as well as the ability to refer to people and objects in the dual. The masculine form is the default in Arabic, and most Semitic languages. This poses a problem for feminist and non-binary speakers. There has been some effort to adapt pronouns that indicate the dual number, ‫( امه‬huma) and ‫( امتنا‬antuma), due to their ability to refer to both the masculine and the feminine. While this practice is not widespread, it’s still important to include this linguistic community due to their substantial presence on campus and in the world.

German There is a German saying that perfectly explains the challenges faced by the German-speaking community: “Deutsche Sprache, Schwere Sprache.” This translates to, “German language, hard language.” Anyone who studies German as a second language can attest to this. The grammar is more complicated than many languages’. German has four cases and grammatical gender applies to every word. Nouns, adjectives, adverbs, verbs and every other part of speech are conjugated to match case and gender.

This creates an obvious barrier to introducing new pronouns, because new forms of conjugation also need to be created.

However, German speakers often create new words. So, German people have taken on the challenge, starting by using genderneutral nouns instead of gendered ones.

Increasingly, gender-neutral nouns are used in official capacities, e.g. universities and the government. The Guardian reports that Studierende (those that study) is replacing Studenten in universities, with various written, but unpronounced, forms also developing. Some predict that the gender system will simplify in the future. This means that das, die, or der will become as all-encompassing as the English the, though the case-related conjugations would remain. Also, dier is another recentlydeveloped option. Some German dialects have already simplified their gender system. For example, the Niederdeutsch (new German) dialect uses the neutral de.

Esperanto Largely spoken by glossy-eyed peaceniks, Esperanto differs from most languages because someone invented it, rather than the language organically developing. It was created to ease communication between different peoples, including nonbinary people. In its early history, speakers proposed genderneutral pronouns, but they have only recently gained traction.

A viewpoint, called riismo is popular amongst the feminist Esperanto community. Riismo advocates for adopting ri as a gender-neutral pronoun. Ŝli is another option that makes grammatical sense, because it’s a combination of the feminine pronoun ŝi and the masculine pronoun li. Although this is considered kontraŭfundamenta, against the fundamentals of Esperanto, the language’s democratic nature assures that at least some spaces will be comfortable with the pronoun.

Personal pronouns are another development. Many are gaining popularity, particularly xier and x in the nominative case.

Corresponding conjugations are also being created.

37

THE PSYCHOLOGY OF REPRESSED MALE HOMOSEXUALITY Hyper-masculinity, homophobia and projection.

Story by: Connor Brennan Photos by: Sarah Pompeii

Many LGBTQ individuals have dealt with a “manly man,” one who seems bent on denouncing anything even remotely gay.

Sometimes, besides his overbearing anger, fear is seen in his eyes as he shouts homophobic slurs. A possible explanation for this vicious homophobia, is that these men may be deeply closeted.

This theory was the focus of a joint study between the University of England in Essex, the University of California in Santa Barbara and the University of Rochester. The study tested male participants to see if they had underlying same-sex attractions.

The results demonstrated that self-identifying straight men showed strong same-sex attractions in response to certain psychological tests.

The study’s lead author, Dr. Netta Weinstein, remarked that these repressed men may consider gay and lesbian people to be a threat.

Weinstein believes this is because they serve as reminders of the men’s latent orientations.

Projection, a psychological phenomenon, explains the repressed men’s aggressiveness towards homosexuality. Basically, projection serves as a defense mechanism where an individual projects onto others their anger over something they despise about themselves. People use this to deny a part of their being that they consider “faulty.”

Exemplifying projection, an aggressively angry guy might

verbally or physically harass an LGBTQ person. In this instant, he attempts to get rid of his identity-related fears by blaming other, more “openly gay” individuals for it.

When repressed gay men fit society’s definition of masculinity, this poses a specific problem. These “manly men” strive to avoid being perceived as anything “less” than manly. A reason for this is that society purports the stereotypical views that femininity and homosexuality are both “weak.”

From a young age, American boys are taught to uphold certain traits and despise others. Boys’ parents, peers and role models demand that they act aggressive and regard passivity as weakness. Boys are taught that manliness is equivalent to everything strong, and that anything feminine is weak and abhorrent. Unfortunately, being gay is deemed “feminine,” so boys are taught to hate homosexuality as well as femininity.

Jungian psychological notions offer additional insight. Carl Jung, a famous psychologist, dubbed terms for everyone’s masculine and feminine traits, which differ according to the person’s sex.

Jung named women’s masculine traits their “animus,” and named men’s feminine traits their “anima.”

Jungian psychology details that a man who constantly represses his anima will never be able to destroy it. Within this ideological framework, a repressed gay man constantly denies his feminine

FUSION || Spring 2017

The psychology of repressed male homosexuality

side in a bid to be nothing but masculine. But, it will always be there in his subconscious, and it can emerge in dangerous ways.

these will inherit the Kingdom of God.” In this verse, the Greek word, malakoi, has varying possible interpretations.

For example, the anima represents emotional strengths such as sensitivity and compassion.

Repressing those traits could cause a man to be emotionally volatile and easily angered.

Of course, there is a social incentive as well, since an aggressive nature is often cherished in “masculine men.”

The interpretation which probably fuels hatred toward feminine traits is “effeminate.” A reader could easily conclude that the passage means that any man with feminine traits, including homosexuality, is not fit for Heaven.

Conversely, Jungian psychology notes that a man who accepts his anima will greatly benefit.

He can relate emotionally to others, using the sensitivity that his anima is based on. It is possible then that if repressed gay men choose to accept their feminine qualities, they may refrain from homophobic actions.

“Boys are taught

that manliness is equivalent to everything strong, and that anything feminine is weak and abhorrent.”

Of course, many other factors lead to a man repressing his sexual orientation. Religious homophobia is an obvious one. In the Bible, there are a handful of verses called “clobber passages,” because these verses are often used to denounce LGBTQ people. In one of these passages, there is an interpretation that further demonizes feminine traits.

That passage is contained in 1 Corinthians 6:910. It reads “Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are malakoi, or practice homosexuality [...] none of

Homophobic religious preachers have seized upon this interpretation to demonize LGBTQ people. It’s bad enough that anybody would believe that God is against them for a harmless, unchangeable part of themselves. But for others to condemn them, and twist God’s word into a platform for hate speech? It’s another nail in the coffin of repression.

Preachers have used tragedies such as the Pulse nightclub shooting to push their ideas.

For example, Pastor Roger Jimenez from Verity Baptist Church in Sacramento, California asserted that the entire community should be executed by a government firing squad.

These messages tell closeted gay men that if they act on their true orientation, society would deem them worthy of death.

Despite this, some athletes recently came out as gay, demonstrating that traditional masculinity and homosexuality can coexist. Michael Sam,

39

who came out as gay in 2014, is a prime example. Sam played football for the University of Missouri, and his team supported him. However, he also received hateful responses from around the country.

On Twitter, homophobes questioned his maleness, told him to stay in the closet and said that Sam betrayed God by coming out.

Among these detractors was Sam Wheeler, then a Kent State wrestler. Wheeler called Sam a f-g on Twitter and called those who objected queers. Shortly afterward, he was suspended from the wrestling team.

Sam’s father, Michael Sam Sr., was initially unable to process the news when his son came out. He believed that Deacon Jones, a Hall of Famer, was turning over in his grave.

Sam Sr.’s reaction demonstrates a prevalent fear about coming out: betrayal; finding rejection instead of acceptance. It’s one thing for a stranger to harass you for being LGBTQ. But if a close friend or family member rejects you for it, the emotional damage can be devastating.

Fear of betrayal can paralyze people. Repressed gay men may rationally fear that their teammates, friends and family members will refuse to treat them with love and respect if they come out.

So, they may never do it.

Fixing this problem requires action. First, society must renounce its unhealthy obsession with masculinity, and cease its contempt for guys who exhibit “feminine” traits. People need to accept that when they mocks femininity, they demean emotional strengths such as sensitivity and compassion. Strength requires emotional capability, which in turn is necessary for today’s divisive culture.

Second, we must deal directly with religious homophobia. When someone claimed Michael Sam’s sexuality betrayed God, they regurgitated that infamous message, “God hates gay people.”

This leads to repression and it must be completely purged. There is no love in telling someone that their sexual orientation makes them unworthy of compassion.

Lastly, we as citizens must unconditionally accept each other, regardless of unchangeable factors like sexual orientation. It all starts with a choice: to love or to hate. Here, there is no middle ground.

Those of us who have already accepted ourselves can teach others to do the same. Though it’s difficult to look past the hypocrisy of aggressive repressed men, they need as much compassion as they can get. Hopefully then they can finally step out of the closet and into self-acceptance.

FUSION || Spring 2017

Toxic relationships

The fabric of the LGBTQ community is tightly woven and it’s no different at Kent State. Due to LGBTQ students’ closeness, people often know anything and everything about anyone; who’s in your friend group, who your enemies are and who’s in your bed.

According to a 2010 CDC survey, the prevalence of intimate partner violence is “43.8 percent for lesbians, 61.1 percent for bisexual women, 26 percent for gay men and 37.3 percent for bisexual men.” Statistically, the LGBTQ community seems vulnerable to toxic amorous relationships. However, not much is discussed about toxic friendships. To shed light on these topics, six students shared their experiences. They wished to remain anonymous and have been given aliases.

CM: “I identified as a lesbian at the time and I was dating a girl

that I met. And I didn’t know a lot about her, it was pretty casual at first. It developed into a very abusive relationship. I would say anything and she would just call me stupid and be like, ‘at least you’re cute.’ I used to think I was smart when I came to college.

I developed an inferiority complex since she was an honors student. I stopped going to class. I was at a really fragile time during the coming out process and questioning my gender.

She spammed [my new girlfriend] on social media, that I was a cheater and my girlfriend was a horrible friend. It developed into a really bad situation. It was a nightmare. It affected all of us, not just the girl I was dating.”

abusive and, like a lot of people in these situations, I was too insecure to get out of it alone. It wasn’t only the abuse that made it toxic, but also my lack of ability to acknowledge it and remove myself from said relationship. It wasn’t until my friends stepped up and helped me understand that what was happening wasn’t good for me – they gave me strength.

AM: “I’ve seen [toxic relationships], I’ve tried to keep an eye on the person who’s the victim of the relationship and I tried to give them information, but there wasn’t much I could do from a bystander point.”

As for on campus, I’ve only had one relationship, and it was toxic for different reasons. We both rushed into it so quickly - it wasn’t organic. I had just started here at Kent and I was looking for some kind of support and comfort. I noticed he had extreme double standards (he wanted me to accept his past mistakes but was unable to accept mine). In the end, he told me it was due to his insecurity. He explained that he was looking for my faults to justify being in a relationship with me. Luckily, at this point in time, I have a sense of self-worth and quickly left the relationship.”

EJ: “I have had my fair share of toxic relationships – the worst of

RL: I was actually in a [toxic] lesbian relationship for 3 years. It

BK: “One of my ex-lovers definitely stalked me. They kept

looking at my Grindr profile and how active I was, my distance.

They were at my dorm waiting for me and just started talking about our hook up in front of everyone.”

it being with someone who tried to manipulate and micromanage my entire life. They were extremely emotionally and verbally

was totally secret. Only her mom and my mom knew. I recently

TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS Story by: Jordin Manning Photo Illustrations by: Alyssa Keown

In the LGBTQ community

41

just got out of that actually, last year.

obviously supported me, though.”

KF: I have experienced toxic relationships in

idea about it. The people I did tell about it were very supportive and helpful. I think within the gay community, before my relationship, I had never heard about two girls being abusive. I feel like there needs to be more dialogue about gay people.”

my past, prior to becoming more self-aware.

It was with a friend of mine who came out to me as bisexual in middle school. She manipulated me emotionally and mentally by basically making me believe the whole world was against me because I wasn’t “black enough” (she was a white-passing person of color). It was mostly done by gaslighting because whenever I called her out for her abusive behavior, she would derail the conversation and make it out to seem like I was the bad guy instead of taking accountability and learning. She used her abusive relationship with her mom as an excuse for “taking everything out on me” and gave half-assed apologies.

“How did the community react?”

KF: “Being a witness to toxic relationships or friendships and seeing the reactions other people have is kind of mind-boggling sometimes. When you’re in a marginalized group, we have this idea that we have to stick together singing ‘Kumbaya’ if we’re going do what we need to do to get basic human rights.

However, that’s extremely problematic because the toxic person isn’t being held accountable for their actions, for the sake of ‘keeping the community together.’

I get that it’s hard for us to get by in our daily lives, especially in today’s trying times, and emotional support is very much needed, but if you’re sowing seeds of toxic behaviors and using your current circumstances as an excuse to treat the people around you badly, what you may sow won’t be pretty.”

EJ: “I have never really been a part of the

community when I lived back home, so there was never really a reaction. Even on campus there wasn’t much reaction from the community. My friends in the community

RL: “Because it was so secretive, they had no

CM: “Everyone kind of gathered around me

and the girl I was dating. They always said, ‘you guys should date.’ They thought we were good together. Our social group was messed up.

Someone Snapchatted a picture of me laying on my girlfriend’s lap to everyone, and that’s how everyone found out that we were together.”

BK: “They were informative and helpful.

The perpetrator was shunned, but they were accepted once everything had calmed down. I had two really good friends who stepped up to the plate for me. They defended me and tried to make sure I was safe. They remind me of my parents.”

From grade school and even into adulthood, everyone wants to fit in. No one wants to feel excluded like in something reminiscent of Heathers, or to appear in something like the “Burn Book” in Mean Girls. While communities can feel welcoming and uplifting, gossip and cliques can be toxic.

“What is your opinion on cliques?”

AM: “Ew! I personally don’t like them. It’s always good to have a close friend, but when it excludes others that’s when it becomes a problem.”

EJ: “I think close knit friend groups are super

important. I think they provide a lot of support to the other people in the group. However, I do think it’s important to keep that group open to letting other people into [it].”

FUSION || Spring 2017

Toxic relationships

RL: “I think they have different connotations. Close knit groups

are comforting. Cliques have a negative connotation. It depends on the group itself. Cliques can be a negative thing, it’s hard to get inside of them.”

KF: “I’ve never really been in a clique, but in all honesty, they’re

really sketchy in my opinion. Mostly because they don’t allow anyone in, but once someone gets out then they do everything they can to make that person look like the bad guy by everybody around them.

A close-knit friend group is something everyone needs.

Sometimes you’ve got to keep your circle small because not everyone is trustworthy or have the intentions they say they do.

It’s a matter of learning the process of weeding people out and

when it’s okay to let people in. You may not get it perfect, but it’s a learning process everyone goes through, no matter which walk of life they’re in.”

Finding one’s niche in a marginalized group like the LGBTQ community can be easier said than done. The community is diverse and widespread. In the long run, the most important thing is that a friend group can be like a family. They can care for and look after you but they can also hurt or abandon you. Being in the LGBTQ community is like having a quilt, and your quilt should be made of fabric that always keeps you warm, even in the harshest, coldest and most unforgiving tempests that you may come across in life.

43

A CONVERSATION WITH AIDS EPIDEMIC SURVIVOR Dan McCune

Story by: MJ Eckhouse Photos by: Sam Verbulecz and MJ Eckhouse

Last year, President Obama ordered flags flown at half-mast to honor the death of former First Lady Nancy Reagan. Remarking on Mrs. Reagan’s time as First Lady, Hillary Clinton claimed, “because of both President and Mrs. Reagan – in particular Mrs. Reagan – we started a national conversation when before nobody would talk about it [HIV/AIDS].” Since many people today aren’t old enough to remember the Reagan administration’s indifference to the AIDS epidemic, former activist and survivor, Dan McCune shares his firsthand experience.

starting up a lot of the AIDS clinics across the country. Rock Hudson dying brought it into someone that everybody knew and then she took over and did a good job. Had Hillary Clinton said “Liz Taylor started a dialogue,” I’d say she knew what she was talking about. She [Taylor] did it from the inside, while ACT UP [AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power] did it from the outside.

When I got diagnosed there were no drugs. [My partner] John and my birthday were the same day, so for our 40th birthday we got diagnosed.

This conversation took place in June and was originally published online.

ME: What year was this?

DM: I used to carry a picture in my wallet, it was a group of 20 or

DM: ‘86.

30 people. They’re all gone, except me. We had parties for people who were going to their doctor to be put to sleep. The doctors did it. When people say that euthanasia and a right to die is a new idea, it’s not. Probably a lot of the AIDS doctors would have gotten in a lot of trouble, so it was quietly done. But it happened.

Ronald Reagan never mentioned it until well into his time. People were dying left and right. But it was a ‘gay cancer,’ so he didn’t much care.

ME: What got anyone to care?

DM: Elizabeth Taylor started the dialogue in terms of high-end people and getting money donated. She was instrumental in

Every plan we made for the future, now there was no future. John and I thought we’d never live to see the year 2000, and he didn’t.

He died 6 months before.

“Gay Cancer” DM: There were drugs and the FDA said they had to go through

all this testing to make sure they’re not going to kill people. We were dying anyway. It was like, ‘fuck you and your regulations.’

They said in 10 years you’ll have the drug, but we didn’t have 10 years. They put us on high doses of AZT [azidothymidine]. It felt like there was a wire wrapped around your head all the time. A

FUSION || Spring 2017

A conversation with AIDS epidemic survivor

few people were fairly healthy, but we had their goodbye party – they couldn’t take the AZT anymore.

I’d go see friends who’d got pneumocystis pneumonia. They’d see ships going by the fifth floor of the hospital because the virus penetrated the membrane around the brain. My biggest fear was that I would lose the ability to think. That scared me more than dying. That’s what scared a lot of people. When they started to hit the mental part, they’d say goodbye.

One day a friend in the hospital asked for a Band Aid. The nurse opened the door, threw the Band Aid in and slammed the door.

The staff didn’t want to take care of us. The ones who took care of us were other gay men. Even when the straight people got it, the people who took care of them were gay men. Call us sissies if you want, we were the ones who had the guts to take care of each other and anyone who got the disease.

We didn’t know how it spread. Then they started talking about the fact that it was through sex. We had just become liberated enough to be able to have sex, then suddenly we’re told we can’t. The gay community denied that ‘gay cancer’ existed as much as Ronald Reagan for a while. But it got to a point when there were too many people dying and we had to step up. Ronald Reagan chose not to step up and that’s when ACT UP came into the picture.

“We Had to Disobey the Laws for the Laws to Change.”

DM: There was a gay pride parade in New York. We were told

that we couldn’t march down Fifth Avenue because ACT UP had gone into St. Patrick’s Cathedral and interrupted the mass. That was because the Catholic Church, to this day, says condoms can’t be used because whatever, so people were dying.

By this point we knew it was sexually transmitted, we knew that condoms work, and they didn’t want anybody to have condoms.

So, we demonstrated against the Catholic church.

The gay pride was after that. ACT UP said ‘fuck you, we’re marching past St. Patrick’s Cathedral again.’ We got to the cathedral and there were cops everywhere.

So, there were two parades: the people who followed the law, and enough people who didn’t that the law was not going to stop us.

ACT UP was why people started to look at it. The FDA started to change their view because ACT UP said we’re dying. We had those shirts, ‘Silence = Death.’ It was. We had to disobey the laws for the laws to change. When people are content with the way things are, that’s what’s required.

Gay Sex, Drugs and Rock & Roll DM: I had sex everywhere I could. Sex was the gay community’s identity. It was sex, drugs, rock and roll. Gay sex was based around drugs, having the right combination.

ME: Once you’ve crossed one line in terms of social

acceptability, do you think it’s easier to cross the next?

DM: I think so. When I grew up, you learned to hate queers

and then you found that you were. Didn’t mean you hated them any less. The cycle was, you felt gay sex was dirty, so you took drugs which allowed you to have sex, which perpetuated unsafe sex. Even when it was known that there was a sexually transmitted disease. The self-hatred that was brought into the gay community played a big part in ‘who gives a fuck, why not die young.’

When I got clean, there was an AIDS housing initiative. One of the guys who lived there came to a [addiction recovery] meeting, so I said I was HIV positive. He said, ‘Why are you bothering getting clean?’ That was 14 years ago.

But there were some good things. Because we thought we weren’t going to live, we traveled, we did stuff I would have never been able to do now. When you’re given what you think is a death diagnosis, you live a little better. John and I enjoyed the hell out of our life.

From AIDS Camps to Preexisting Conditions DM: Towards the end of Reagan’s term, people advocated

camps. Straight men were so afraid of the disease, they were coming up with ideas of how to separate everybody out. Even in California, a [former U.S. Representative] by the name of [William] Dannemeyer, advocated the camps.

We still have some laws, like gay men could not give blood. Still can’t. I think they loosened it, but that was a disqualification.

Even though they have tests to tell.

ME: I think now gay men must be abstinent for a year.

DM: Yeah. People lost jobs, lost insurance. Then you can’t get

it because you have a preexisting condition. Of course, once you started taking [meds] the insurance companies knew. I think confidentiality laws have tightened, but once upon a time if some insurance company found out, you couldn’t get insurance.

45

Canapi an HIV/AIDS resource in Akron

Looking Ahead: Advice for Young LGBTQ Leaders

them. Even members of the gay community said be quiet.

It wasn’t easy. But change comes through visibility more than anything.

ME: What’s the most important thing LGBTQ people should know for today’s struggles?

When people know that their brother or sister or cousin is gay, it makes it harder for them to hate. Not that they change overnight.

DM: On one hand, realize that things can change. Don’t be

ME: Anything else you want to share?

defeatist. Things have changed a lot, I’ve seen it. But also, stand your ground. Things don’t happen just because they should.

Things change, but they won’t unless you make them change. If it wasn’t for ACT UP, some [meds] would probably just be getting to the tunnel now.

When I was 40, I was told I wouldn’t make it to 43. John only made it to 54. When people are dying, you can’t be silent. Things changed because people saw we were there and visible.

ME: Visibility and acceptance are different things.

DM: You have to maintain visibility. You’re not going to get

acceptance right away. People in ACT UP got the shit beat out of

DM: Visibility is key. At first there’s going to be backlash. The fact that people are lashing against you is good because that means they’re scared. That’s the beginning of the change in values. Things are getting better.