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PSSSTTT... Apes
Dolphins do it.
You I too...
What’s the buzz on gossip, and why is it so much fun?
Is it man’s playground and woman’s authority? Nadira Mendis Amarasinghe
digs around
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how me someone who never gossips, and I’ll show you someone who isn’t interested in people.” I don’t know about you, but when I hear that it was Barbara Walters who said that, I’m willing to bet that she knows what she is talking about. From lunch time chats at the office, to cocktail party buzz, to late night Facebook/MSN rendezvous I think it would be safe to say that most of us, if not all, enjoy the delectable pleasure of talking about other people. But where did it all start? Does one sex gossip more than the other? Is there a constructive use for gossip? What do we do with gossip that comes our way? Do we have a preference for the type of gossip we engage in? Allow me to go technical on you for just a moment. The word gossip has as many connotations as the details of a generally juicy session of gossip does. Gossip can be ‘light, informal conversation for social occasions’; it can be ‘a conversation about others that reveal information about their personal or private lives’; or ‘a general report of the behaviour of other people’; and it can also be ‘a way of talking, socially without divulging too much information about oneself.’ Or it can be the name given to an individual who loves to pass on bits of information about other people. Here’s a common thread that runs throughout all the definitions: gossip is talking about people who aren’t present in the ongoing conversation.
What Darwin missed Take a few steps down with me on the lad-
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Even those who do engage in malicious gossip, often do it unconsciously. They place themselves on high moral ground, and see themselves charitably looking down on their slowly sinking victim.
der of evolution. The dolphin has been labelled one of the most intelligent mammals, next to human beings. Just between you and me, I most certainly feel that they are indeed more intelligent than some of the human beings I have met in my life! But here’s a shocker: they gossip! Yes, these cute marine mammals actually talk about others of their kind, in their absence! Makes you wonder about those wide, smiling, innocent-looking dolphin faces we see on Nat Geo now, doesn’t it? In an article titled The Last Days of Gossip, in the Discover Magazine, Bruno Maddox writes, “Each bottlenose individual identifies itself by a unique pattern of whistles and clicks along the lines of woo-woo-wee-wee, or even woo-weewoo-woo-wee-woo. What was not known until a Scottish research, however, is that a pair of dolphins use the name of a third dolphin when that third dolphin isn’t present. In other words, dolphins gossip.” Interesting isn’t it? Research has also shown that apes talk about each other during the time they meet for their daily grooming sessions (If you ever wondered how ‘beauty salon gossip’ came about, well, now you know). So I would say that it’s safe to assume that gossip was not invented by humans in the last century or two, but has actually evolved pretty much in the same way intelligence across species has. Woman Today conducted a mini survey to see how people react to gossip in general. What we discovered ran essentially along the lines of what people generally thought about gossip, with a few exceptions. Both men and women answered the questionnaire on gossip, and on most questions they had pretty much the same
views, but there was a distinct difference in how they answered a key question. “It is said men gossip less, do you agree?” All of the women who answered the questionnaire said they disagreed with that statement, and 100 percent of the men emphatically agreed with it! The question that followed asked them to give reasons for their answer. Women said that men have the same need to satisfy curiosity, that they do gossip but they call it ‘a discussion’ or ‘analysing a situation’, but basically it boiled down to the fact that they do indeed engage in as much gossip as women do. I have to agree. My husband often hovers when I am on the phone and when I wave him away he mumbles something about me getting ‘some juice’ on someone else. But I must say for someone who sounds so put-off by it, he seems very anxious to know the details when I hang up! When I do choose to divulge the contents of my conversation, he soaks it up. Here’s what I can say with certainty in his defence; I rarely hear him passing it on. This however doesn’t mean that he gossips less. It might simply mean that he doesn’t know people who might be interested in knowing about people I know and vice versa! Gender and gossip also has a few evolutionary/biological bases. Looking back at the earliest human civilisations of the
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We build alliances by gossiping. When we share a piece of gossip, we actually send a message to the recipient of the gossip that we have deemed them worthy of receiving this bit of information from us...
hunter/gatherers, it was women who had the chance to talk while moving along with their daily chores. Gathering fruits, berries and vegetables, drawing water from streams and rivers did not require silence, so they would talk as they went about their work making it easier for them to share and spread information about the community. Men, on the other hand, were out hunting, which required prolonged periods of lying quietly in wait for their prey to come by. This didn’t leave much room for so much as a loud cough, let alone the exchanging of neighbourly information of any kind. According to Marianne Bjelland Kartzow in her book Gossip and Gender, an academic study of gender differences in gossip, men felt excluded from the conversations of women, and so would watch these conversations from afar and trivialise it by calling it ‘idle gossip’ and it was this patriarchal notion that led to the stereotype of gossip becoming a group of women engaged in animated conversation.
The devil is in the details Biology has also unwittingly helped stigmatise women as the source of most gossip. The left side of any human’s brain is the verbal, detail -oriented side, and in women this side is more developed than in men. Women, by a large margin, are more verbal about everything (cue for men to roll eyes and agree!), but jokes aside, even by the age of two, girls have used twice
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as many words as boys have. But women using more words and detail to express themselves than men do, doesn’t make men less likely to be interested in, or pass on information about, other people. It’s just that men use less detail and words. A typical female conversation would go something like this – “OMG! Did you hear that X and Y are splitting up? He was having an affair with his secretary and X found out. She is devastated! The poor kids! They’ve sent the kids to her mother’s till it’s sorted out. I hope he agrees to settle out of court and fast, instead of dragging it out! It’s such a shame! They seemed SO happy!” A male conversation about the same subject would go something like this – “Y is getting a divorce.” “Why?” “His 24-yearold secretary!” “Oh! Let’s take him out for a drink after work!” And if anyone thinks that the after work drink did not bring out all the juicy details of the saga (especially details about the 24-year-old secretary), think again. Women will make sure they know all the minute details about the situation because that is simply how women are. We need ALL the details to see the whole picture. Men, on the other hand, may not need as many details (storage for detail might be an issue) but this doesn’t mean they don’t need or want the basic information. So now we’ve basically established that different species gossip, that women and men both gossip, but WHY do they gossip? Does it do anything constructive? In our survey we found that 100 percent of the people admitted to engaging in gossip, and the majority of people, that is exactly 92 percent of them thought gossip was fine as long as it wasn’t harmful, while the rest of them believed that just talking about someone who wasn’t present was wrong (but they did it anyway and felt guilty about it).
A virtual boost The thing with gossip is, it went electronic making it easier than it’s ever been to talk about other people. It’s very hard for anyone to stay aloof of information about others with stuff like Facebook and Twitter going around. You log on to your account and your entire news feed is about other people. Permit me to coin a term here, if you will. Though I agree that everything we hear or see on social media networks doesn’t fall into the category of hard gossip, it can certainly be considered to be ‘soft-gossip’! Here’s what I mean; “Ben is now friends with Nancy” – Really? How do they know each other? “Sonya is now in a relationship” – OMG! Since when? Ahmed just uploaded 12 new pictures to the album title ‘My Family’ – “Awwwww his kids have grown so much since last month’s upload!” Not only do we read all this, we respond in our heads, or actually write a comment, we add our share to the information chain. Having said that I must also say, it is essential to make the distinction between gossip and real, proper information sharing. At the end of the day, the difference between the two boils down to the intention behind the statements we make. When we say, “Mike is no longer in a relationship” we can just convey the information we see as a simple statement, or we can repeat it with the hidden agenda of finding out more information in order to repeat it to someone else. Many people use networks like Facebook and Twitter for official purposes and there are those who don’t. Those who use social networks for official purposes often use it expressly for sharing information. While this doesn’t qualify the information to be called gossip, there can be occasions when the line between the two can also blur. Anyway to get back to the all important question; we update our statuses, we post pictures, we argue with friends on our ‘wall’ all of which is public to at least the 200+ people on our ‘friends list’. Whether it is how ‘hot’ we think someone is, or a new birth in the family, or our baby’s first step we have got into the habit of putting it all out
there! But, why? Gossip has two sides to it. There is that side that gives you the warm fuzzies, when you catch up with a good friend and discuss all that has happened to you and mutual acquaintances since your last catchup session. Then there is the dark side, the nauseating shame and frustration, not to mention the blinding rage you experience when you discover that someone is spreading bad and hurtful news about you. Let’s first look at the bright side. Networking! No it’s not a coverall for mindless gossip. It’s a fact! We share information in order to build and maintain networks. Our social structure is complex and forever changing, and this information helps us stay in touch with what’s happening. When I go back to Sri Lanka on holiday, I meet up with my three closest friends. We have known each other since we were all freshman in college, and thanks to our well organised networking, I don’t feel left out or lost during conversations about the goings-on in their lives or lives of other mutual friends and acquaintances. So call it information or soft gossip or whatever you will, but the fact is that it keeps you connected.
Information is power Here’s another reason we use gossip for: Influence. We use gossip to build influence. When we talk we drop names of people we know, we show how much we know about certain people, and so build ourselves up in the eyes of the person or people we are talking to. Think of the colleague who constantly talks about your biggest client’s family life. They build themselves up as someone who has influence with the client since they seem to be privy to so many personal details that one would not know if they were not emotionally close. As much as men might not want to admit it, this is something they engage in quite often, in order to build or boost their image in the eyes of others. Alliances. We build alliances by gossiping. When we share a piece of gossip, we actually send a message to the recipient of the gossip that we have deemed
them worthy of receiving this bit of information from us, thus building up an alliance with them. Think of the number of times we have said “I’m gonna tell you something, but you can’t breathe a word about it to anyone!” With that statement you build a strong tie between yourself and the other person. In our survey, we found that people heard the best gossip from, and passed on the best gossip to their close friends. I for one am notorious for sudden ‘cropping’ of my friends list on Facebook, and am guilty of making those who remain on it feel like I have just bestowed a great honour on them by letting them stay my friends and being privy to my personal life.
Gossip is a great component of the glue that keeps our society together, and as long as it is not malicious or degrading, it can serve a number of positive purposes.
Tread carefully On the flip side, gossip can be negative if done maliciously and viciously. Let’s say David decides to raise his own status with Nada by telling her something negative about Yousuf. As likely as it is that Nada will see herself as privileged to receive this information from David, she might also walk away wondering how many times David said negative stuff about her to people in the office. Although gossip can strengthen bonds in a community, it can also create a contest between winners and losers. Negative gossip about third parties who have no chance to defend themselves is dangerous and can rebound on the gossiper. To be good at malicious gossip, one needs to build up a high level of subtlety and skill, and thankfully this is frowned upon and thought of as very distasteful by everyone. Even those who do engage in malicious gossip, often do it unconsciously. They place themselves on high moral ground, and see themselves charitably looking down on their slowly sinking victim. This is exactly what we do when we gleefully soak up information about the
latest celebrity gossip. ‘Paris Hilton’s marijuana charges in South Africa’, ‘Gary Coleman’s ex-wife’s right to switch off life support’, or ‘Miley Cyrus’ ex-boyfriend’s nude pictures’, whichever piece of gossip we choose to follow, we place ourselves on higher moral ground and in the process of reading the gossip we judge the victim. However, our survey showed that the older the person was, the less likely they were to be interested in celebrity gossip. But gossip about friends and acquaintances knew no barriers; every age group in both sexes agreed to engaging in gossip about people they knew personally, though no one wanted to share the most interesting piece of gossip they remember hearing. Gossip is inevitable, it is a part of our lives. Actually it is an essential part of our lives and no one, not men, not women, nor children, can say that they are above such idle chatter. When all is said and done, the funny thing about gossip is this; it is strangely a great component of the glue that keeps our society together, and as long as it is not malicious or degrading it can serve a number of positive purposes
(The author is a psychologist and counsellor. She writes for Woman Today and addresses various psychological and emotional issues. If you have questions, you wish answered, write in to wtoday@omsqatar.com)
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mind on my
by shalinee bharadwaj
“Have you heard of Mrs Lockerhead’s latest extra marital? I met her ex at a party and oh boy... he was oozing poison! Quite progressive, isn’t she?”
“Did you see Smita’s style...
Looks like she’s going to be the next Miss Universe?”
I
come across such suggestive sentences – often left open ended, sometimes streaked with assured evidence and almost always laced with definitive sneer, throughout my waking hours. The decisive strength of any social gathering, placing it on the pedestal of success or casting it as outright boring, these delicious moments of ‘friendly’ chitchat are cherished and awaited by all. Call it the devil in us or simply a genetic etiquette; we are all caught in this ever tempting desire to talk about lives and lifestyles of people around us.
The ultimate lure Wondering what makes us lust for a peep into matters not related to us, I decided to surf through the wonder world of Google and out came an interesting result. We may be biologically tuned to it! Evolutionary psychologist Dr Charlotte De Backer says that we’re genetically programmed
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to gossip! Gossip lights up our brain cells in positive ways, literally making us feel good. “It is widely known for humans that chocolate stimulates the release of endorphins, and therefore eating chocolate stimulates feelings of happiness,” says Dr De Backer. “Gossip is also an instant stimulator of endorphins.” Talking about other people releases those feel-good hormones, the reason why gossip feels so inviting. Gossip also plays a role in developing human intelligence and furthering social lives! In the times when humans competed with the beasts for survival, gossiping about the neighbours and surroundings ensured better chances of survival. Today, people who know what’s going on – who’s quitting a job, who’s selling a house, who’s leaving her husband – stand a better chance of finding new jobs, making better real estate deals, and befriending new bachelors. Gossip equips us with information that provides us a lead, an edge above the rest! So, does it mean that gossip is healthy to be engaged in? “We certainly do not deny that gossip behaviour has its drawbacks,” say researchers at the University of Oklahoma. “Still, if there is a positive side of gossip, we believe it is that shared, mild, negative attitudes toward others can create and/or amplify interpersonal intimacy.” Shared gossip over a ‘common enemy’ can befriend strangers, enhancing social bonding. Gossip counters secrecy. It may reveal the personality of men and women. People who gossip reveal enriching information about themselves. But, remember – if someone gossips endlessly about others, he/she may also be gossiping about you!
The fine art of gossiping Much as a fine narrator, to be a true gossiper is an art that polishes with time and experience. While everyone is a gossiper to some extent, the nature and knack varies from person to person. The savvy gossiper: This category includes people who have developed the capability to spread news and views in the
most sophisticated manner. They appear intellectual, indifferent and trustworthy. Almost always their gossip will be close to reality. You will never find them getting caught on the wrong foot. While you can be easy bait to their gossiping, they seldom reveal anything about themselves. The relentless gossiper: Gossiping is their major forte and they make conversations interesting by their spicy talks. Most of the gossips are revealed, created and set ablaze in this category. More often than not, these people are guided by ethics of gossiping and intentionally won’t harm anyone. Such people like to talk about and discuss their own lives as well. Popular, though not always likeable in the social circles, they befriend strangers easily. The loose talkers: This is the category you need to be wary of. Without much experience in healthy gossiping, they tend to reveal secrets that may cause harm to the reputation or prospects of other people. While you can extract gainful information from them; it is highly unadvisable to reveal your status to them. Gossiping requires balance. We don’t trust the tight-lipped, nor do we confide in blabbermouths. It is a sin to distort the truth, but it is also a sin to be boring. Gossip can be a wonderful ally, only if the code of conduct is set and practised. Keep secrets: Although it seems counterintuitive, good gossipers are extremely adept at keeping some information in confidence. Nothing will get you ejected from a social network faster than the knowledge that you’re the community post office. Know your audience: In general, people are most interested in their peers: people of their own age and gender. Men like to hear about money and their bosses; women like to hear about anything and everything. Embellish: “People are more compelled by story than by truth,” says Hollywood publicist Michael Levine. Although outright lying will get you in trouble, colourful storytelling is almost always preferred to drab reality. Never reveal your sources: Artful gossips know how to keep the original
name
source of their dish hidden. This is especially true when they are the original source. Don’t rebuff a disclosure: Resist telling someone to shut up, even if their gossip makes you uncomfortable. Smile, tell a joke and redirect the conversation. “Return their overtures in spirit, but not in content,” says psychologist Sara Wert.
A life without gossip As psychologist Dr Sandi Mann puts it, “A life without gossip is an admirable quest but one that is probably as unlikely as pledging to live a life without telling lies. Put simply, without gossip we run out of things to say-and without things to say, we cannot build relationships!” Blogger Lucy Silag decided to run through the soul cleansing process after many catfights only to find that life is impossible without gossip. In her words, “Of all the self-righteous, self-imposed selfimprovement schemes I’ve ever undertaken, giving up on gossip definitely left me the loneliest. Not to mention the quietest. It was only when I was stripped of the ability to talk freely about other people that I realised how much of my incessant commentary had been gossip rather than real opinions about things that actually matter.” Now at least we can rest assured, free of guile or guilt, to indulge in this old art of creating social relations. While steering clear of the rumour mill, following the path of healthy gossip in today’s highly interactive society may be just your gateway to a prolonged healthy and informed life. Juicy gossip may be a substitute to chocolates in the endorphin release, what parallel alternative can we wish for in our diabetes ensnared lives. And in case you ever got caught-blame it on genetics! Staying true to the spirit and soul of gossip, I therefore pledge to let myself flow with the word of mouth. Despite the negative connotations it invites, I hope I am able to shun some negativities off this unique form of human articulation.I must leave now and check on Lucil. Saw her puffy eyed in the morning...guess she is on with her second divorce...
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ge h y t u ce l s i eb l n a iv ti es zz y by
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hy is it that Demi Moore’s botox-injected non-wrinkled avatar or Madonna’s latest adoption lawsuit is capable of inviting and holding our attention and thought to the extent that it does? What makes us gossip about celebrities? The rich and the famous-the glitterati? Their lives evoke a pleasurable rush, an allure we love to chase. Our lives are stressful and busy – and maybe a little boring sometimes! Knowing that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt disagree about whether or not to spank Zahara or that Lindsay Lohan is in a sticky situation over her legal battle, momentarily liberates us from the boredom and monotony of a routine common man’s life. Celebrity gossip is safer than any other gossip; we can spread rumours, give our opinions, and spend hours speculating about the lives of the glitterati without ramification. It
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The final Hunt
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rom the moment she stepped foot outside, Princess of Wales, Lady Diana had camera lenses and microphones pushed in her face. She was constantly pursued and for this reason, she sometimes had to hide or disguise herself in order to avoid the unyielding persistence and constant harassment of the press. “There was a high price on the head of Diana, Princess of Wales – dead or alive, as it tragically turns out. The amount being paid for any picture of the princess getting to know her first serious beau since her divorce had increased dramatically. Princess Di was used to being the most photographed woman in the world, but her link-up with Dodi Al-Fayed had thrown the scavengers of celebrity into a heightened state of alert.” – Time magazine A graceful, ambitious and competent life lost in a shroud of rumours, she ultimately found her solace in a tragic end.
A
A mistaken identity?
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fter falling prey to painkiller drugs and getting ripped off for allegations of child abuse, the King of Pop was compelled to seek refuge in a rehab. He lived a life full of rumours and scandals. From the changed colour of his skin to gossip about his marriage and children, Michael Jackson’s lifestyle nourished gossip columns incessantly. Even his death left behind a mystery to be solved or maybe not to be resolved so as to continue greasing the continually churning buzz wheel.
instills in us the much-needed feel-good factor.
A dream to chase Celebrity life has continued to provide fodder for the million magazines and websites that command an astonishing reader fellowship. Celebrities serve as public examples of what can happen when one has everything that money can buy along with the freedom to create fabulous relationships. Most of us have limitations on our resources. That pool may be larger for some, but what we share in common is that very few of us have the ability to step off the grid. Celebrities can. In addition to a fleet of Ferraris and Louis Vuitton handbags, their privilege also affords them the mental freedom to take unlimited time off to spend on their dream vacation with a company of their choice. Or to ponder and act upon questions related to happiness and what is life? This gives us a role model, a life we would love to step into. There is something about the financial freedom and the personal liberty that we find enticing. For the few
moments that it takes to read or watch their stories, we’re transported out of our own lives and into theirs. We get to experience what we think it would be like to walk in their shoes.
The other side of the table Much as we find ourselves involved and lost in the tinsel world, the other side of the story is equally compelling and surprising. The celebrity world is full of examples when the entertainment publications and news sites and channels have impacted their lives strongly, even harshly! That is the time when we find the real world being controlled and even dictated by the power of the written word. Distorted facts published as paparazzi scoops have been known to create havoc with the already tumultuous lives of the celebs. In their quest to present a tantalising story, rumours and gossips are followed till the time they are baked up to the level of entertaining scandals. It’s a matter of ‘You scratch my back and I will scratch yours’! The celebrities also take full advantage of the gossip mill,
lashing at their peers or just to keep themselves ‘in the news’. After all, to be on the pedestal, staying famous is more important than being famous! With the blown up gossips, celebrity relationships do feel the stress of damage, in turn producing a litter of more gossips. And by staying in tune with this entire media circus, we in some bizarre way find a release from our own stresses! The truth stays that gossip magazines still sell better than most literary best sellers. Accept it or not, celebrity gossip is an inseparable aspect of our lives and we love it!
Growing-up blues
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iley Ray Cyrus gained fame for her role as Miley Stewart/Hannah Montana on the Disney Channel sitcom Hannah Montana, which began in 2006 and is currently in its final season. Hannah Montana became an instant hit and propelled Miley to teen idol status, according to The Daily Telegraph. With fame comes controversy and when she began her transition from the lovable TV star to an adult actress and singer, she found gossips and rumours spread along her way. Her onstage costumes and dance performances have ignited media criticism all over. Currently entangled in a mesh of bad image, Miley is well set to drop significantly in the popularity charts that once heaved her to the celebrity status.
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The Get a grip on the grapevine
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Being the official teller of tales is not the way to be everybody’s best friend. Frankly, being everybody’s best friend is not possible at all. So choose your gossip buddies with care.
Commandments
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When gossiping about the boss, be extra careful. Chances are one of your colleagues is a snitch.
While gossiping with the boss – yes, you must – be reluctant, very reluctant, to divulge information about colleagues. And only give away information that is known to more than a couple of folks at work. If colleagues get to know you are feeding the boss with juicy stories, you will be ostracised. It’s ok to discuss botched-up presentations (Excel sheets are extra large bedspreads), body odour (deo deficit) and personal hygiene (a messy bathroom in Y’s wake). But don’t cook up stories, and definitely don’t spread malicious gossip that are true only in your vivid imagination.
04 05
Keep gossip to a gentle back and forth on the weird things people do – but don’t elevate it to the not-so-fine art of character assassination.
Don’t intrude on people’s privacy – sneaking into their mail boxes, going through their cabinets, reading their text messages on the sly – to provide fodder for gossip. That’s plain unethical.
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f you are out of the office grapevine, chances are you are out of it altogether. Office gossip has its utility, but like all things tasty, too much of a good thing can land you with a pain in the belly.
Now, before you shake your head in disapproval, answer these questions. l You’ve made a mean joke at a colleague’s expense. l You’ve been part of a gossip session, even if you haven’t contributed to the conversation. l You’ve spread unconfirmed titbits about colleagues. l You felt no glee at your boss’s slips, and did not snicker about it. If you’ve answered ‘Yes’ or ‘Maybe’ to any of these questions, get off your high horse and get tuned into ethical gossiping.
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fix
Employees would rather deal with gossiping co-workers than with colleagues who have poor time management skills, according to Randstad, a leading staffing firm and workforce solutions provider. The company’s new Work Watch survey, conducted by Ipsos Public Affairs among more than 1,000 employed adults in the US, revealed the top three workplace pet peeves to be: people with poor time management skills (43 percent), gossip (36 percent) and messiness in communal spaces (25 percent).
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If you are the boss, don’t initiate a gossip session. Don’t encourage compulsive gossipers. But don’t turn a deaf ear either. You need to be in the know.
08 09
Always question the gossiper’s intention before you accept every word as gospel truth.
If you have friends at work, it’s critical that you not only not gossip about them, but also that you alert them on things that may damage their cred or official position.
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Keep religion and race out of gossip.
The only thing worse than being gossiped about is not to be talked about at all.
Gender Blender
What does it mean to raise gender-neutral children? ral kids? How difficult is it to raise gender-neut Does it benefit the child to be raised gender neutral? Nadira Mendis Amarasinghe explores the stereotypes ildren. we force on our ch It’s a boy!!” or “It’s a girl!!”! From the moment the doctor calls out these words at the time of delivering an infant, the child’s fate is sealed. Forever he or she will be viewed, treated and judged by that label of their sex. In the hospital they will be assigned blue name tags if they are a boy and pink if they are a girl, their rooms at home will be decorated along the same lines, their clothes will be chosen to suit this label and
their given name will fit the label too. But is it possible that as parents we put far too much emphasis on making our children live up to the labels? What then is gender? Does the world push our kids into gender stereotypes? It is essential that as parents we understand clearly the distinction between sex and gender. When we refer to the sex of someone we talk about their biological make-up – hormones and internal and external sex organs. It’s very clean cut and
you really can’t go wrong with it. But when we speak of gender, it is so much more complicated and vague. Gender refers to what a society or culture delineates as masculine or feminine. It has to do with our learning process and our environment, and essentially has more to do with who we are than our biological sex does. So while the concept of sex remains constant globally, gender roles and the corresponding expectations change from culture to culture. Having said this, we must also realise that 2010 August
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