Options Magazine-September 2014

options

September 2014

LGBTQ News, Resources & Events

1st Annual PawSox LGBTQ Night pg. 12

FREE Rhode Island’s LGBTQ community magazine since 1982

options

In This Issue:

LGBTQ News, Resources & Events

Rhode Island’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community news source since 1982 September 2014, Vol. XXXIII, Issue 5

Boston Ironsides Competes in Bingham Cup pg. 18

Kids Seek LGBTQ Adoptive Parents pg. 7

An Interview with Marti Rosenberg pg. 14

4 Letter from the Editor 4 Your Letters 5 Calendar 6 Letter from the Publisher 6 Our Advertisers 7 Adopting an Older Child 8 News Briefs 10 Our Election Expectations 12 Out on the Town 14 On the Shoulders of Giants

18 20 24 25 26 28 29 30 38

Drag Bingo Season Begins pg. 26

Boston Ironsides Rugby RI Bar History: Part 2 AIDS Walk for Life SAGE-RI AIDS Care Ocean State Youth Pride Inc. TGI Network of RI Resources Worth a Look

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Publisher Kyle McKendall kyle@optionsri.org Editor in Chief Jen Stevens editor@optionsri.org Calendar Editor Samuel Simas info@optionsri.org Copy Editors Jodi Glass, Bradford Greer, Steve Kagan, Elizabeth LaRoque, Joseph Morra, Maria Phillips, Myra Shays, Nate Zane Graphic Design Theresa Barzyk Writers Amy Anderson, Christion Battey, Adam Brooks, Ethan Comtois, Christopher Dalpe, Bradford Greer, Sally Ann Hay, Kerri Kanelos, The Lit Chick, D.J. MaGee, Kelly Scafariello, Jen Stevens Photographer Jennifer Bonin Advertising Director Traci Allen advertising@optionsri.org Finance Director Donny McKendall billing@optionsri.org Subscriptions Francis Ryan frank@optionsri.org Intern Bret Jacob bret@optionsri.org General Information info@optionsri.org PO Box 6406 Providence, RI 02940 (401) 724-LGBT www.optionsri.org Cover: Mr. Gay RI Anthony Maselli, Ms. Lesbian RI Betty Lebesian, Miss Gay RI Nadia Starr

Š OPTIONS 2014. Options is published monthly. The opinions expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the governing board, volunteers or staff. Listings are provided as a resource and do not imply endorsement. Submissions to Options must include a phone number or email address. Names may be withheld on request. Submissions, ads, calendar or resource listings for the October issue must be delivered by September 12.

Options | September 2014

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From the Editor Dear Reader,

In 2004, as a barely-out-of-the-closet, barely-out-of-college community organizer, I literally landed my dream job when the politically savvy Marti Rosenberg (interview pg. 14) hired me as the Campaign for Marriage Equality’s first employee. Looking back ten years, I couldn’t have anticipated how my newfound community and the education I was receiving would become so essential to my identity now.

Lobbying legislators and listening through hearings proved that it’s impossible to fight for issues and not care about elections.

When your rights are on the line, those in power had better have your back.

Tireless volunteers, including leaders Frank Ferri and Seth Magaziner, proved that with sincere passion, commitment, and an organized team, things really can change for the better. To

see these two community members become viable statewide candidates one year after Rhode Island’s marriage victory deeply inspires me.

For many gay folks, this is the first election in our state where a candidate’s stance on marriage equality need not dictate our vote. In this issue we ask what gets you to the polls for Rhode Island’s important primary election September 9 (pg.10).

Beyond the election possibilities, our local non-profits present us with some great reasons to celebrate within these pages, and where there’s strife, there’s hope.

In Solidarity, Jen Stevens

Your Letters

I’ve been working on my argument for PrEP a while now. I have heard several people who are opposed to it, and many who are confused by it. While I’m probably not going to dissuade them, I would like to at least support the case.

PrEP stands for “pre-exposure prophylaxis,” and is a single pill called Truvada that HIV-negative people take once a day; it protects them from becoming infected by HIV. It was approved by the FDA in 2012, but a lot of people still don’t know about it.

I am HIV+, undetectable (an extremely low amount of virus in the blood that cannot be detected by the most advanced tests), and healthy. Having HIV today is certainly not like it was 20 years ago. The medications are much safer and easier to take, and lead to an essentially normal life expectancy. However, HIV can still be potentially life threatening if not treated, or if diagnosed late. Had I known about PrEP before I was diagnosed, I definitely would have taken it; and I think that all gay men should at least know about it and have this option.

Now, let’s take for example a heterosexual couple. We’ll call them Elsa and Jack. Let’s say they’ve been together for a few months. They both trust each other enough not to use condoms. However, Elsa, being healthy and having functional lady parts, is capable of having children, which is not something they want in this stage in their relationship, if they want it at all.

Now, do we tell Jack he is doomed to use condoms unless he wants to likely have many children? No. That’s insane. We give them a whole list of options. There’s the pill, intrauterine devices, spermicides, and probably some other things I’m not even aware of because accidentally planting my

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seed in a uterus is not a major source of anxiety for me. In any case, there is still a risk, but this risk is assumed by the two of them in order to be more intimate.

At the risk of sounding like a childhating heterophobe who likens offspring to disease, I do think the same principle here applies to HIV. If my partner “barebacks” me, there is no 100% certainty that he won’t get HIV, just like there’s no 100% certainty that Elsa won’t get pregnant. That’s why sexually active people need to educate themselves and engage in practical dialogue around these issues. When you have open discussion about prevention and strategic risk minimization with your partners, you might find that PrEP is a reasonable option for you.

As ACT UP founder Peter Staley said, “The goal is not condoms on dicks. The goal is fewer HIV infections. So how do we get there? What’s the quickest path?” We need to stop looking at HIV like there’s only one solution.

This is especially true with serodiscordant (or “magnetic,” or “mixed”) couples, where one partner is positive and the other is negative. When positive individuals on medications have an undetectable viral load, the likelihood of transmitting HIV is already quite small, if not nonexistent, as the preliminary findings of the recent CROI Partner Study are revealing.

The problem is that people aren’t always forthcoming about their status. We don’t always ask, and positive individuals aren’t always able to take their medications for a variety of reasons. So why the reluctance to embrace PrEP as a viable alternative?

Are people really that concerned that they’ll be labeled a “whore” if they utilize Truvada as PrEP? Or is it that we, as gay men,

are embarrassed to admit that we enjoy intimate fluid exchanges as much as our heterosexual counterparts?

If these were women (and not men who have sex with men) would we be supportive of using birth control pills? Of course. If there were a vaccine for HIV, would we be lining up for it? Undoubtedly.

We are not bearing children, and we will probably not see a vaccine for at least another decade, if ever. But we still have the right to experience intimacy and healthy forms of pleasure.

We could write a book on the reasons why gay men take sexual risks despite potential consequences -- loneliness, isolation, depression, intoxication, sex for money, fear, stigma, misinformation -- and try to address these societal problems individually. Or we could act now, by utilizing every tool in our HIV-prevention toolkit, including this little blue pill that, when taken as directed, has a higher efficacy rate than condoms, which are more readily found being used as balloons at bachelorette parties than they are on the nightstand of that guy you met on Grindr.

HIV is transmitted one person at a time; we have the options to prevent it one person at a time. For more information about how to access Truvada as PrEP, contact The Miriam Hospital Immunology Center at 1125 North Main Street, Providence. Their walk-in hours for free HIV/STD testing and to discuss PrEP are Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday from 12:30-3:30pm.

- Mr. Gay Rhode Island 2014 Anthony Maselli, Providence

Options | September 2014

Calendar of Events Rhode Island Pride Honors September 7 September Wed. 3 & Thu. 4 Junior Providence Singers auditions, by appointment only (4-8pm). The RI Philharmonic Music School, East Providence. For more info, www.providencesingers.org/JPS or JPS@ providencesingers.org.

Fri. 5 Testing for HIV, STDs, and HCV, 12:30-3:30pm.

The Miriam Hospital’s 1125 North Main Street office.

Testing is offered on a walk-in basis Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday from 12:30-3:30pm. and at other days and times by appointment. Free for those without insurance. For more info, 793-4715.

Sun. 7 RI Pride Honors, annual gala, 7-10pm. Aqua at the Marriott Downtown Providence, 1 Orms Street.

Pyramid of Pride presented to Jack Hartwein-Sanchez, Spirit of Pride presented to Options Magazine, Parade and Volunteer awards given. Cash bar, appetizers. $35 single ticket/$60 couple. For tickets and info, www. prideri.com or info@prideri.com.

Tue. 9 Primary Election Day. Check the Secretary of State’s website to find out where and when to vote.

Sun. 14 RI Prime Timers, 4:30-7pm. Network for gay and bisexual men 50+. Social, dinner, and meeting. For more info, www.riprimetimers.org or call Steve at 996-3010.

Wed. 17 Queer Book Club, 7-9:30pm. Books on the Square, 471 Angell St. Reading: Crackpot by John Waters. Discount if book is purchased at Books on the Square. For more info, email queerbookclub@ gmail.com.

Thu. 18 Drag Bingo, 7pm/6pm doors. Riviera Bingo Palace, 1612 Elmwood Ave. $20. 18+ Fri. 19 - Sun. 21 Stargaze, women’s art, music, and camping festival. Barrington, NH. For more info, www. lesbiannightlife.com/stargaze.

Sat. 20 Life at the Tipping Point, SAGE-RI’s 2014 Annual Meeting and brunch from 11am-1pm, at Chelo’s Hometown Bar & Grille, 2225 Post Road, Warwick. Free for members; a $10 donation from non-members to support Education and Outreach programs is requested; checks should be made payable to SAGE-RI, 235 Promenade Street, Suite 500, Box 18, Providence, RI 02908.

Options | September 2014

AIDS Walk for Life September 27

Sat. 20 37th Annual Rhode Island Heritage Festival & Celebration of Diversity, noon-6pm. Roger Williams National Memorial, North Main Street, Providence.

For more info, mercedes.monteiro@preservation.ri.gov.

Tue. 23 Bisexual Pride Day! Check out www.biresource.net.

Wed. 24 RI Pride Open House, 7-9pm. RI Pride Center, 1005 Main Street #1105, Pawtucket, in the Hope Artiste Village. All are welcome to socialize and discuss what’s happening in the Pride organization and the larger LGBTQ community. For more info, 4672130 or info@prideri.com.

Fri. 26 RI Women’s Association 36th Anniversary Dance, Letter Carrier’s Hall, 174 Mayfield Ave., Cranston. 7pm. $10.

Sat. 27 29th Annual AIDS Walk for Life, 9am registration. Rhode Island State House. Benefits AIDS Project RI, which provides education, prevention, testing, and a range of services for people living with HIV/AIDS in RI. Sun. 28 Options Magazine Release Party, 3-6pm. The Stable, 125 Washington Street, Providence. No cover. www.optionsri.org.

October Fri. 17 Youth Pride Inc.’s Cabaret!, annual awards gala. 5:30-11pm. Crowne Plaza, Warwick. Jacqueline DiMera hosts. For more info, www.youthprideri.org.

Fri. 24 ArtBeat, a fundraiser for AIDS Care Ocean State, 6:30-9:30pm. The Biltmore Hotel, 11 Dorrance Street, Providence. $45 Regularly Scheduled Support Groups: ACOS (youth): Tues. 4pm, (gay males): Wed. 1:30pm Alcoholics Anonymous (LGBT group): Tue. 7pm COLAGE (children of LGBTs): 3rd Sat. 10:30am PFLAG (parents, friends, allies): 1st Wed. 6:45pm TGI Network (trans*): 1st & 3rd Tue. & Sat. 7pm TransFamily New England: 2nd Mon. 6:30pm Youth Pride Inc./Way Out: Tue. 5pm See Resources on page 30 for more info.

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From the Publisher

Advertisers in This Issue

It was midnight and I was walking on Dorrance Street in downtown Providence when a man shouted, “You’re a fucking faggot” at me out of his car window. His words were preceded by a comment about my shorts, which, in full disclosure, were fashionable navy khakis and fell about an inch above the knee.

This story isn’t meant to evoke memories of how things used to be; this event took place a few weeks ago. This was a personal reminder that the road to acceptance is long – a mindset that members of the Options team have always had.

As we work to strengthen this organization, I ask you to consider three ways to contribute to Options:

Spend time with us. A few hours of your time spent distributing, editing, writing, photographing, or discussing your ideas for the magazine would make a huge impact. Options relies on a small, dedicated, mostly volunteer staff to pull the publication together each month and distribute it around the state. There are fundraisers to plan, digital channels to manage, invoices to be sent, and a larger purpose and mission that need defining. Please consider joining the team.

Donate. It costs about $1.75 to print and mail one copy of Options to a subscriber. Mailing 12 times a year to over 2000 subscribers is costly. Consider offsetting this with a contribution. If each subscriber donated $20 this year we would be in great shape.

Advertise. If you own a business please reach out to discuss advertising with us. Your contribution will keep us in print and bring new customers through your doors. Encourage your contacts with advertising needs to support Options.

In this issue we say goodbye to long-time advertiser Linda Handel as she announces her retirement. Linda, a licensed mental health counselor, has supported both Options and her practice by placing a monthly ad in our publication. Linda wrote, “The only place I have ever advertised is Options and have felt the warm arm of everyone involved around me for many years.” Our team is thankful for Linda’s support and wishes her much happiness in retirement.

Options’ presence today is just as important as when we first published in 1982. Its evolution as a safe space for open dialogue about sexual expression and gender identity is one we aim to continue until this type of forum becomes unnecessary, and that day is hard to imagine. I hope that the content within Options influences those outside of our community, fostering thoughtful discussion among people like the man who called me a faggot. It’s exactly this dialogue that will change opinions and prevent hateful actions.

11, 25, 32 & 40 AIDS Care Ocean State 28 AIDS Project Rhode Island 9 Bill Hendrickson, Electrician 22 Blue Cross Blue Shield of Rhode Island 37 City Kitty 31 Family Service of Rhode Island 36 Gregory’s Optical 24 High Rocks Condominiums 17 JDHS Photos 9 Jennifer Minuto, Attorney 19 Jennifer Minuto, Musician 7 John D. DaPonte, Mental Health Counselor 7 Linda Handel, Mental Health Counselor 35 Marjorie L. Roblin, Mental Health Counselor 34 Pell for Governor 17 Plumbing by Paul 17 Quidnessett Country Club 27 Rameaka Law Offices 16 Residential Properties 17 Rhode Island Association of Gay Professionals 2 Rhode Island Pride 19 Rue De L’Espoir 39 The Satin Doll 23 SERVPRO 37 Stephen J. Dennis, Lawyer 33 Town Hall Lanes 27 Yael & Paula, Relationship Coaches 11 Youth Pride Inc.

Onward, Kyle McKendall

Please Support Our Publication!

For over 32 years, Options has provided the LGBTQ community with news, resources, and event listings.

Please consider making a contribution to help support the cost of printing and mailing.

Checks can be made out to Options Magazine and mailed to PO Box 6404, Providence, RI 02940.

Online donations accepted at www.optionsri.org.

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Options | September 2014

ADOPTING

Typically when people think of adoption, they think about infants whose parents feel they cannot care for them, very young children who are removed from their birth parents’ care due to abuse or neglect, or children in other countries who are living in orphanages. But what about the children who are removed from their birth parents when they are older? What about teenagers who come into foster care? Is it too late for them to be adopted?

As an adoption specialist for a program called Wendy’s Wonderful Kids based in Connecticut, my job is to find permanent, committed families for older youth in foster care.

In this world, “older youth” means age eight and above, which is the age at which interest from families looking to adopt begins to decrease. By the time these youth reach adolescence, interest drops even further, as people tend to have the flawed belief that older children are unable to attach to adoptive parents or that they come with too much emotional baggage to ever be successful in a family. While these children have likely been hurt and betrayed many times before, it is all the more reason that they need the support of a forever family that will stand by them as they heal from past trauma.

Some of these children are specifically seeking an LGBT parent or parents. Some are questioning their sexual orientation and/or gender identity, or identify as LGBT, and feel that LGBT parents will be able to offer them the acceptance and guidance they may not find in other families. Some kids have had traumatic experiences with caretakers of a specific gender and become triggered by future caretakers of that gender. Many are simply

Options | September 2014

by Amy Anderson

an Older Child

open to any kind of family that will care for them.

One such child I would like to tell you about is 12-yearold Nitayah (pictured). Nitayah is a kind and bright young lady who loves animals, being outdoors, and expressing her creativity through her vibrant fashion choices. She has run two 5K races, and looks forward to doing more in the future. Nitayah is thoughtful and enjoys doing little things to make the people she cares about feel special. Once she gets comfortable with someone, she will show off her playful side and her witty sense of humor; she may even challenge you to recite one of her favorite tongue twisters. This resilient girl has experienced a lot of hurt and disappointment in families. Despite this, she longs to meet a two-mom, all-female family that will keep her forever. Nitayah will thrive in a family that is calm and very nurturing. She would do well in a family where she can be the only child or the youngest by at least a few years. A family in northwestern Rhode Island, southcentral Massachusetts, or eastern Connecticut will best match her need to stay connected to her support people.

Do you have room in your heart and home for a child as special as Nitayah? Are you interested in learning more about her search for parents who will nurture and care for her? Do you simply want to learn more about adopting an older child?

If so, please contact me, Amy Anderson, Adoption Specialist at Wendy’s Wonderful Kids (Klingberg Family Centers), 860-832-5593 or amya@klingberg.com.

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News Briefs

by Adam Brooks

Equity Action Grants $47,500 to LGBTQ Organizations

GLAD Celebrates One-Year Anniversary of Marriage Equality in RI

This August, we celebrated one year of marriage equality in Rhode Island. To commemorate this victory the Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders (GLAD) held a soirée at Local 121 in Providence with featured speaker Janson Wu to thank supporters for making RI the tenth state to end marriage discrimination. GLAD’s ultimate goal is equal justice for all, and they continue to do big things in our little state.Their focus now is to ensure that no LGBT group is left behind in our strides towards freedom, and that our nondiscrimination laws aren’t hindered by over-reaching religious exemptions.

Uganda Strikes Down Anti-Gay Law

In August, a Ugandan court invalidated an anti-gay law passed earlier this year. The bill, noted by watchdog groups and activists as being excessively severe, provided jail terms of up to life in prison for those convicted of engaging in gay sex. It also allowed jail sentences for individuals found guilty of “attempted homosexuality” or “promotion of homosexuality.” Activists and LGBT allies cheered when the Constitutional Court declared the law illegal because it was passed during a parliamentary session that lacked the necessary quorum. Many activists celebrated cautiously, as this may not be the end of the law.

The state could appeal the ruling in the Supreme Court, and legislators plan to reintroduce different anti-gay measures. In addition to this, Uganda has laws in place that criminalize any sex act deemed “against the order of nature,” which allows for continued arrests of LGBT individuals.

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According to a Rhode Island Foundation press release, the Equity Action Fund awarded $47,500 in grants to nine LGBTQ organizations for two categories of grants: Projects that meet the community’s priority needs through the empowerment of under-represented individuals in LGBTQ communities and capacity-building grants for board development, strategic planning, program development, fundraising, or other activities that build the capacity of organizations that play a vital and unique role in the LGBTQ community. Beneficiaries include SAGE-RI ($7,500), Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders ($8,000) , and Youth Pride Inc. ($10,000). “Our grantees engage in efforts to ensure the health, safety, and fair treatment for all LGBTQ Rhode Islanders,” said Adrian Bonéy, who oversees Equity Action at the Foundation. “Much of this important work is accomplished by strengthening alliances among organizations working to address the most critical needs of the LGBTQ community across the state.

Hate Crime Victim Sentenced for Self-Defense

On August 12, 21-year-old Atlanta native Luke O’Donovan was sentenced to two years of prison and eight years of probation on charges that he assaulted his attackers in an alleged hate crime. On December 31, 2012, five or more men shouted anti-gay slurs at O’Donovan after seeing him dance with multiple men at a New Year’s Eve party and then reportedly attacked him. According to his account, O’Donovan defended himself with a pocketknife and fled the scene. Hours later, police arrested O’Donovan while he was receiving medical attention at the Atlanta Medical Center. He was charged with five counts of felony aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and one charge of attempted murder. Eyewitnesses interviewed by local media outlets had little information to offer, but sources close to O’Donovan are calling this “the epitome of a hate crime.”

Options | September 2014

News Briefs

Third Win for Marriage Equality in Florida Last month Broward County, Florida Judge Dale Cohen ruled on a case in which he affirmed that the denial of marriage equality to same-sex couples in Florida is unconstitutional. The lawsuit was filed by Heather Brassner, who had entered into a civil union in Vermont and is seeking a divorce in Florida in order to remarry. The court could grant the union’s dissolution only if they were to recognize out-of-state same-sex civil unions.

The judge indicated that he “was not prepared to grant the divorce without addressing the constitutionality of the same-sex marriage ban – and the same-sex marriage recognition ban,” according to Nancy Brodzki, Brassner’s attorney. Brodzki then filed a motion for the judge to rule on Florida’s constitutional ban. “Every win in court brings us closer than we’ve ever been to the freedom to marry in Florida,” said Nadine Smith, CEO of Equality Florida. “We look forward to the day when all loving, committed couples and their families enjoy the same protections, opportunities, and responsibilities of marriage under the law.

Every passing day inflicts real hardships on families who are denied the legal protection and dignity that marriage equality provides.”

Former Ex-Gay Movement Members Denounce Conversion Therapy

On July 31, nine former leaders of various “ex-gay” ministries published a joint letter denouncing the practices of conversion therapy and lent their support to the #BornPerfect campaign that aims to end conversion therapy in the next five years. In the emotionally raw letter, the nine leaders recall their struggle with identifying themselves as members of the LGBT community, which led them to found their ex-gay ministries. They chronicle their eventual realization that conversion therapy is not only ineffective and dangerous, but can have lasting harmful effects on young LGBTs. They write: “As former ex-gay leaders, having witnessed the incredible harm done to those who attempted to change their sexual orientation or gender identity, we join together in calling for a ban on conversion therapy. It is our firm belief that it is much more productive to support, counsel, and mentor LGBT individuals to embrace who they are in order to live happy, well-adjusted lives. We fully support the aim of #BornPerfect to bring an end to conversion therapy.” The #BornPerfect campaign was created by the National Center for Lesbian Rights to work with legislators across the nation to protect LGBT youth from the harms caused by attempting to change one’s sexuality.

Jennifer A. Minuto LGBT Legal Advocacy.

Options | September 2014

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Our Election Expectations

by D.J. MaGee

There is no denying that the LGBTQ community has substantial voting power when implementing change through the legislatures. However, after conquering the local marriage equality battle, we are left to wonder what Rhode Island’s next big civil rights accomplishment will be. The community is rightfully basking in the glory from our recent victory.

So have we begun to settle down or does this ignite another fire within us to take on a new challenge? Though we won with the partial strike-down of DOMA last year, there are still many stayed rulings within the federal district as conservatives continue to push back on equality. While keeping that in close consideration, we also have to consider what other national issues Rhode Island LGBTQs can get behind to continue our forward momentum as leaders in change toward social justice.

As conscientious voters we aim to mindfully explore the positions of current candidates, not only to select the proper leader to meet the needs of the LGBTQ community, but also to ensure statewide success. Previous candidates supportive of equality had ample volunteer and monetary support from LGBTQs, so with the elections just around the corner, why not ask members of the community what their major concerns are moving forward.

Let’s start with LGBTQ-specific issues.Emily Douglas,who lives in Coventry and serves as Vice President of RI Pride, stated, “I think we need to work hard to have an open and accepting attitude toward our transgender community, especially the youth. Transgender bathroom access and bullying in schools are still major issues. As long as anyone is not equal, we must continue to fight for change and elect officials who are

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understanding and educated about our community.” Our transgender youth face different obstacles than their peers and special support is needed to overcome one of the more challenging times in their lives. Raising awareness of this issue within our school systems is not only vital to ensuring equality, but also begins a dialogue about how we can find a resolution to the problem.

The Gay and Lesbian Student Education Network (GLSEN), a national organization that addresses bullying and harassment in our schools, could be a major force in educating our youth, who are the future business owners and voters, regarding the transgender inequality gap. Unfortunately, there is little conversation regarding transexuality within our school systems (or generally speaking) We are continuing to find that this is an ongoing issue for many people young and old. Even though Providence received a positive rating of 81 out of 100 in HRC’s 2013 Municipal Equality Index, this does not necessarily represent the quality of life within the community.

It evaluates city laws and policies as an examination of how inclusive city services are of LGBTQ people. The bottom line is youth need support in schools and older transgender individuals will also benefit from public gender-neutral restroom facilities. The hope is that change here in Rhode Island could spark a national trend furthering steps toward greater equality.

Being a taxpaying resident of Providence, one of the major issues I have recently turned my attention to is the crime increase in some neighborhoods that many of us are now witnessing.

Budget shortfalls have caused the capital city and other municipalities to reduce the number of patrol officers in their forces and Rhode Islanders can only

hope government grants will fund the additionally needed salaries. The recent spark in crime on Federal Hill, a prime fine dining and late night entertainment neighborhood for tourists and locals alike, jeopardizes potential economic growth we hope to obtain through this and other gathering spots if safety cannot be maintained. Some candidates advocate the inclusion of more community centers or additional taxes on weapons to help prevent crime in the first place. LGBTQ opinions are likely to vary on this topic, but are those voices being heard?

“Any candidate running a negative campaign loses points with me,” says Brad from Pawtucket, who is also concerned with economic issues and supports “fair business taxes, adequate funding of our infrastructure and social services, and job growth.” RI’s unemployment rating has consistently ranked number one in the nation for almost a year and currently stands at 7.7% according to the July report from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. One job-creating solution offered by former Providence mayoral candidate Brett Smiley would be to embrace our proximity to Boston and initiate a high speed rail service to assist the hard working commuters trekking to the Massachusetts capital daily.This would not only add support for workers in our state but also open up a swifter form of travel for potential tourists and business.

Other plans to increase jobs and revenue involve capitalizing on our coastline by adding more waterfront dining and shopping areas to appeal to new business partners. Theoretically our shores would be more open to commerce by offering more shipping and receiving incentives.

Other members of our community feel environmental protections should be at the forefront of campaigns. Jessie

Options | September 2014

from Providence added, “I’d like to hear from candidates who’ll create incentives for businesses, home owners, and individuals to reduce their carbon footprints. We’ve been hearing for years that investments in public transportation, green jobs, small businesses, and renewable energy can stimulate the local economy in a positive way. We need legislators to make our environment a top priority, and fast.”

It is clear Rhode Island’s LGBT community, for the most part, pays attention to what candidates promise during their campaigns, and we have very high expectations for what they will accomplish once in office. We as a community need to dig deep, awaken the sleeping giant still enjoying the marriage equality triumph, to not only command the poll decisions, but to ensure we are taking greater strides towards equality that will positively bring change to Rhode Island.

Subscribe and receive every issue of Options Magazine in the mail, for free! www.optionsri.org

Options | September 2014

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OUT

PawSox LGBTQ Night GLAD Celebrates 1 Year of Marriage Equality Photos by Jennifer Bonin

On the Town 12

Options Options || September 2014

OUT on the Town

Options | September 2014

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“On the Shoulders of Giants”

An Interview with Marti Rosenberg

by Jen Stevens

events with the click of a button. And credit card donations online changed everything again.

The problem is, sometimes we assume that everyone reads every email we send (they don’t), and we forget to pick up the phone. Grassroots organizing should still be focused on talking to one another and not just thinking we can click for change.

O: What drew you to your first electoral campaign?

M: My first campaign was Liz Morancy for Lt. Governor, in 1988.

Liz is an amazing woman. She was a Sister of Mercy (the same order as the courageous Nuns on the Bus) and a state legislator – until the Providence Catholic Bishop told her she couldn’t be both a nun and an elected official. She chose politics as a way to create change.

Options: Could you explain your political philosophy in ten words or less?

Marti: Get involved. Be strategic, not just tactical. Get others involved!

O: How do you make a living these days?

M: I work at The Providence Plan and serve as the Program Director of our Health Initiative. The Health Initiative has two major projects. First, we work with the Office of the Health Insurance Commissioner to educate and engage small employers on insurance rates.We make sure that employers know how the rates are set and what they can do to have an impact on those rates. And for the past two years I’ve been working very hard to help launch HealthSource RI, Rhode Island’s health benefits exchange. I’ve worked on the communications team and led the outreach efforts that helped get Rhode Islanders enrolled in a health insurance plan to fit their individual or family needs.

O: I worked for you as a community organizer from 2003-06 while you were the executive director of Ocean State Action, a coalition of progressive organizations. How has grassroots organizing changed in ten years?

M: The biggest change has been in the communications tools we have now that we didn’t have before. Grassroots organizing is all about people who want to make change organizing other people who are willing to share their opinions with decisionmakers. When I started in the mid-1980s, we talked on the phone a lot and we made flyers with Letraset press-on letters.

The fax machine was groundbreaking because we didn’t have to hand-deliver press releases when we wanted some media attention. Ten years ago, we were relying on email like it had always been there, and then Facebook allowed us to build

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I had a part-time job at the time and was looking to find another one. A friend who was on Liz’s kitchen cabinet recommended me and I jumped at the chance. I made $100 a week and learned how to work morning to night and all weekend long! I met scores of people on that campaign who I still see today, and I learned a great deal.

O: Who are your heroes, local or well known, who’ve inspired you most in solidifying your convictions?

M: All of the people who have been my heroes have been grassroots activists. Some of them were famous, like Harvey Milk. Others not so much, like some of the election volunteers who have worked with me, coming into our offices day in and day out. I’d say that my most well-known hero right now is Elizabeth Warren. My family and I all helped run a Get Out the Vote effort for her Senate campaign, and I had the opportunity to see her speak twice. She is simply brilliant.

O: Have you ever regretted voting for someone?

M: I thought about this question for a while, and can’t think of anyone for whom I regret voting. Have I been disappointed in politicians? Yes. But I can’t think of anyone where the alternative would have been any better.

By the way, I love voting. I’d do it every year if I could, and I’ve always loved to take my children with me when I vote.

When my daughter registered to vote, I don’t know who was more excited. We were both thrilled.

O: Would you tell us about the moments of both your greatest legislative victory and your greatest legislative defeat?

M: I’m proud to say that I’ve been involved with a pretty long list of legislative victories – especially when I was the executive director of Ocean State Action. We built a lot of effective campaigns that won some great things. Marriage equality is of course the most recent, and whenever I go into a restaurant or a building and see the “No Smoking” signs, I think, “I helped

Options | September 2014

do that!”

But the victory that stands out for me was in the early 2000’s. Earlier, Ocean State Action had won access to RIte Care (Rhode Island’s Medicaid-managed care health insurance) for undocumented children and, as a result, we were the state with the lowest uninsured population in the country. When the state budget got tight again, the legislature threatened to take away this coverage. We fought that budget amendment but we didn’t hold out a lot of hope. The night before the vote I was with my children and I couldn’t stop thinking about what would happen to another mother’s children who got sick in the middle of the night and couldn’t get care because they were uninsured.

The next day, we reached out to some religious leaders and we stayed on the floor of the House until the very last minute, lobbying. Then we sat up in the gallery staring at the leadership. I just couldn’t get that mother out of my mind. After a couple hours, the House leadership announced that they had found a way to keep those kids covered.

My greatest legislative defeats were all of the years that either the gay rights legislation or the marriage equality bill would melt away without getting a vote, or would fail by a slim margin. There were a couple of years where the House would kill the gay rights bill and then the next year the Senate would kill it. We were sure they planned it that way. It was just so frustrating that the legislators could be so cavalier with our community’s civil rights.

O: How has your activism affected your family life, both growing up and with your children?

M: My growing up was filled with music and performing. I played the piano and percussion in bands and orchestras. In college I got involved in student theatre, playing the piano and then producing. That was my training ground as a community organizer. So I didn’t become an activist until after college.

My partners have all shared my values – because I couldn’t be involved with someone who didn’t – and some of them have shared my activist work. And I’m proud of both my children, who have been a fantastic part of my activism, both as my inspiration for making change and as my companions at rallies, door knocks, and mailings. It’s really rewarding to see my daughter, Amelia, choose to spend her time and talent for progressive candidates and causes. She’s spending the summer between her freshman and sophomore year at Brandeis working for Seth Magaziner’s campaign for treasurer.

There are challenges, though – late nights, long days, and weekends that were not spent at the beach or on some great outing. Balance is the key, and I still strive toward that.

O: I recently learned you were once the Director of the Rhode Island Feminist Chorus. Which issues challenge the feminist movement today?

M: First, I think the fact that some of the biggest victories of

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the feminist movement are 30 to 40 years old presents a huge challenge. Not enough people - women or men - remember all that it took to win those changes. As I said before, we can’t just think that we can click a few buttons on a computer and start a social movement. Movements take much more longterm engagement: time, effort, strategy, leadership, money, and passion. We still have many victories to win in the feminist movement – pay equity, the second shift, protecting women’s access to reproductive health care, just to name a few – but we won’t do it if people think we can click our way there.

O: The marriage equality movement in RI, of which you were a tremendous leader, brought together Rhode Islanders from all walks of life – faith leaders, environmentalists, organized labor, women’s advocates, entire families, elected officials, and beyond – to fight for equal rights for all. Even some legislators grappling with religious beliefs or conservative constituencies stuck their necks out in support. Do you believe LGBT community members ought to support other causes or candidates, now that marriage has been won?

M: Yes, absolutely – the LGBT community ought to support other causes. The LGBT movement did not win marriage equality alone; the progressive movement won marriage equality. It took us over 20 years to strengthen that movement in Rhode Island, building relationships among all of the groups that you mentioned. Marriage equality was one of its key victories. Electing Sheldon Whitehouse to the US Senate in 2006 was another.

It’s crucially important that our community recognize all of the people in it – especially the transgender community, which has made amazing strides in visibility over the last couple of years. And we need to recognize our brothers and sisters in other movements, and support their work.

O: Which candidates do you most enthusiastically support this election?

M: The statewide candidate whose race I’m focused on most this year is Frank Ferri, who is running for Lt. Governor. Elizabeth Roberts has been a terrific leader, and Frank will continue her work in critical areas like health care. He’ll also take the office in some new directions, like turning it into a watchdog over wrongdoing in government. Frank and his husband Tony have been together for 33 years and we know them both as heroes for marriage equality. Soon the state will know Frank as the best candidate for Lt. Governor!

I’m also proud to support Seth Magaziner for General Treasurer. He has a tremendous set of ideas for how to use that office to turn around our state’s economy – and he has the intelligence and political acumen to get it done. We need our General Treasurer to move forward, not backward – and so I’m supporting Seth.

For General Assembly races, there are a lot of exciting ones,

15

including the candidacies of community and marriage advocates Maria Cimini, Edie Ajello, Gayle Golden, plus newcomer Aaron Regunberg who is running for State Representative.

My suggestion is to look at the websites for Planned Parenthood Votes!, RIPAC, Clean Water Action, or other key organizations that do endorsements, to find out how the candidates in your neighborhood match up to your positions.

O: Might you ever run for office?

M: I used to be sure that I would run for office. I wanted to be the Chair of the House Corporations Committee, to work on health insurance issues. When [the] Senate seat [in my district] opened up, my son was too young for me to run – and that was fine with me. Josh Miller is my State Senator and does a great job. Sometimes I’d like to grab the microphone on the House floor and give a good speech, but I am just as happy to be a behind-the-scenes strategist.

O: If you could change one thing about politics in Washington, what would it be?

M: Now that’s a hard question. Just one thing? OK, I’d force the Republicans to tell the truth. Not the opinions that they put forth as truth or the Fox News spin, but the actual truth, including scientific facts. And then maybe we could start to have a real dialogue about how to make things better in this country.

O: If you woke up tomorrow and had to choose the next

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President of the United States, who would you choose? Feel free to name a V.P. too.

M: I would love to see Elizabeth Warren be the next President of the United States. However, because she continually says that she’s not running, and we should believe her, then I’m ready for Hillary Clinton. I’ve been watching her speak lately, and I think that we could really use her intelligence in the White House.

And if Elizabeth Warren didn’t want to be her running mate, I think that Sheldon Whitehouse would be a pretty fabulous pick.

O: Why should voters turn out in the primary election on September 9?

M: Put simply, throughout history people have died for the right to vote. In this country, Revolutionary War soldiers, slaves and former slaves, women’s suffrage activists, and civil rights heroes all lost their lives to create and to fully participate in our democracy. And there are men and women all over the world today who risk their lives to get to a polling place, and dip their thumbs in the blue ink that says that they’ve voted. I think that for anyone in this country to ignore that history and to blithely say that it doesn’t make a difference is dangerously uninformed and unpatriotic.

I’ve worked on elections in Rhode Island that were won by nine votes – and been involved in ones that lost by four votes.

So yes, your vote counts!

The primary election is September 9. The general election

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is November 4. It often helps if you make your plan now. What time will you vote? How will you get there? If you need a ride, I know that there are a dozen campaigns that would commit right now to drive you to the polls! Speaking of that, there are a dozen campaigns that would love you to call them up and volunteer right now. So, back to my political philosophy: Get involved!

On the Shoulders of Giants is an ongoing series showcasing those who have dedicated decades to furthering LGBTQ equality in RI and have made major contributions to our community’s shared history and victories. This is the sixth interview in the series.

Options | September 2014

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For more than 32 years, Rhode Islanders have trusted Options Magazine as their primary source for LGBTQ news, resources and event listings.

Readers look to our advertisers before making their purchasing decisions.

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17

BOSTON IRONSIDES

by Kelly Scafariello

Rugby Heads

Down Under

For the Boston Ironsides Rugby Football Club, rugby is more than just a sport. Brotherhood, pride, community, life-changing, solidarity. These words are just a few you will hear when members of the Boston Ironsides Rugby Football Club (BIRFC) describe their teammates and experience with the club.

BIRFC was founded back in 2002 as a “Boston-based gay-friendly rugby club.” Mark Bingham, a noted hero from 9/11, inspired the premise of this club, and other similar clubs founded around that time. An openly gay rugby player, Bingham showed bravery on Flight 93, as he was one of the heroic passengers to try to overtake the hijackers who attempted to fly the plane into the White House. Instead, the plane went down in Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

BIRFC committed to honor Mark’s memory by creating a competitive rugby club. The club is affiliated with the International Rugby Board and sanctioned

by USA Rugby. BIRFC represents not

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only Boston but all of Massachusetts, Connecticut, New Hampshire, and Rhode Island. The club is also a fully accredited member of the International Gay Rugby Association. This organization “promotes rugby as an inclusive, non-discriminatory sport which everyone can play regardless of sexual orientation, race, religion, nationality, ethnic origin, political beliefs, athletic ability, age, physical challenge, mental challenge, or health status.” Coed teams are prohibited, though women can be supporting members and referees, and serve on governing boards. The general rule for a transgender player is that he must have completed at least two years of hormone therapy and undergone a surgical procedure.

The league currently has about 40 members; they play home matches at Moakley Park in South Boston.The season officially started with practices in August.

Matches begin in early September with the season concluding in mid-November.

Ironsides then resumes play in spring

with matches in April through mid-June.

Recruitment and play are really yearround, so reach out at any time to give this exciting sport a try.

In addition to Boston Ironsides’ traditional matches, the club also participates in the biennial international gay and gay-friendly Mark Kendall Bingham Memorial Tournament, otherwise known as the Bingham Cup, which fields teams from 15 countries in various host cities. The club returned to this year’s tournament held in Sydney, Australia from August 24-31.

Marc Gemma, Vice President of Marketing and Sponsorship of the BIRFC said, “24 of us are traveling to Sydney, about half of whom will be experiencing Bingham for the first time. My personal goal is to play hard and do my very best to represent the Ironsides, New England, and the U.S. with pride, and hopefully bring home some hardware.”

The Bingham Cup is more than just

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are. It’s an intensely personal and private ‘Here I am!’ moment amidst this huge swell of community and solidarity.”

Partaking in the Bingham Cup solidifies the club’s commitment to one another and passion for the sport. The Ironsides are also deeply committed to participating in “public outreach programs as well as local and regional charities.”

If you are interested in joining the league or learning more about the Boston Ironsides Rugby Football Club, please visit www.bostonironsides.org. To learn more about the Bingham Cup, please visit www.binghamcup.com.

a bunch of teams out there to play rugby. It celebrates the life of Mark Bingham and his brave act, which inspires players on their respective teams and in this tournament. Former BIRFC athlete Dennis Noonan-Sloan shared, “I have often referred to my Bingham Cup experiences as life-altering. The level of intensity and emotion exhibited by the players on all teams is second to none in any sport. While I only had a few minutes of match time in 2006 (in New York City), I still rank it up there with my marriage and the birth of my two sons as one of the greatest experiences of my life.” Noonan-Sloan, who has stepped away from playing on the pitch, still stays connected by taking pictures and baking brownies. He said, “It’s my thing as the team grandmother.”

To help subsidize the cost of this year’s tournament to Sydney, the Ironsides ran a fundraiser in July at the Harbor Lounge on Commercial Street in Provincetown, MA. This is the second year in a row that the Harbor Lounge has lent support to the club. All money raised helps go toward food and other incidental expenses. Gemma said, “The tournament being in Australia this time makes it extremely expensive for North American players and teams.” The support turned out to be very fruitful for the club. Gemma continued, “We exceeded our goal by just a bit, enabling the team to pay for most meals during the tournament and easing the burden a bit on our players.”

No matter how long or expensive the travel costs are, the commitment to each other, the team, the meaning of the tournament and this sport keeps the Ironsides going biannually.

Gemma said it best about his first cup, which he attended in 2012: “I didn’t realize what an overwhelming and uplifting experience I was soon to have, sharing my love of the sport with fellow ruggers from all over the world – adversaries on the pitch but brothers just the same, all of us being who we

Options | September 2014

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Jennifer Minuto 401 263 6171

19

RI Gay Bar History: Part 2

STEPPING OUT W

here are you? Grindr? Scruff? Growlr? Checking out the stats of Mr. Right Now who may be in the neighborhood or chatting with his friends ten feet away? Maybe you’ve already exchanged information and photos on Match.com? ManHunt? Christian Mingle? You fix your hair one last time, straighten your shirt, check your makeup, puff yourself up, flex, and off you go, ready for your meet and greet.

You already know the vital stats: what she looks like, what she does for a living, maybe even his penis size and how versatile he claims to be in bed. You call his cell phone and let him know you’re here. She tells you what color she’s wearing and where

specifically she is.You smile and introduce yourself - re-introduce yourself because you have already met - just not in person.

The Internet has changed bar business significantly. People don’t have to go to a bar and buy a drink to meet someone.They can do it online from the comfort of their home.

With the advent of societal acceptance we can walk proudly and unashamedly into our establishments. Now we can marry and adopt children. We have Youth Pride, SAGE, book clubs, dating sites, bowling leagues, softball, choruses, international gay film festivals, the Gay Games, and every major city has a Gay Pride Parade. The early bars all helped to pave the way to

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by Bradford Greer

where we are today. We started somewhere over a rainbow and now we’re proud to be born this way.

Last month we explored the origins of the Mirabar as the longest-running gay bar in Rhode Island. People have come forward to say that it was not the first public place homosexual Rhode Islanders congregated. Here are the recollections we have found.

There was a gay speakeasy on Benefit Street during prohibition. Who knew? A brothel existed there at some time where, among the heterosexual activity, some white men went to specifically engage in sex with black men. In fact, at one time in its history, Benefit Street was known as the gay ghetto.

Also during the 20s and 30s, the Dreyfus Hotel (now home to the restaurant Local 121) was a popular place for travelling salesmen and theatre patrons; many gay people hung out there.

It is also rumored that in the 1950s the cocktail lounge was for women only. Earlier Central Falls had two lesbian bars: Marty’s on Railroad Street, which may have been the very first lesbian bar, and Dube’s on Earle Street. Frank Ferri’s father was a bartender and his mother worked in the coatroom of the BNB Nightclub in Johnston, which hosted drag shows.

It is also reputed that in Woonsocket, around 1972, the Blackstone Hotel on Clinton Street (now a senior citizen high rise) and the St. James Hotel were once the site of gambling and “other activities.” Woonsocket also had the 61 East School Street lounge, Kings and Queens beginning in the 80s, and of course the Mirabar beginning in 1947. Woonsocket appears to have quite the history of gay activities. “Drive slow your car?”

Mmm hmmm.

In the early 70s Daisy Buchanan’s was a bar on Dorrance and Weybosset Streets in Providence (now the Johnson and Wales Library), and further up was Fanning’s on Clemence Street. That was also about the time that the Homestead Café and The Cabana opened up for lesbians on Valley Street, where it operated off and on for several decades. In the 1970s, The Gallery was the biggest disco.Then there was the Fife and Drum, which eventually became Night Affair and then the No Name.

In December 1973, pressure groups succeeded in forcing the American Psychiatric Association to remove homosexuality from its list of mental illnesses. Many homosexuals walked out of their closets and slammed the doors like a screen door in a hurricane. The Beatles 1970 hit expressed it best: “Let It Be.”

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If you remember the 80s you remember big hair, big shoulder pads, Jordache jeans, ice cream-colored polo shirts with alligators and collars were UP! We’ll skip over the drugs because no one in Rhode Island was doing any of that. We were too busy watching Cagney and Lacey and Dynasty, and wondering who shot JR. We boogied to Madonna’s “Like a Virgin,” Michael Jackson’s “Bad,” Kool and the Gang’s “Celebration,” and Wham’s “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go.” In 1980, 40 East opened with a sunken dance floor, pool room, and back patio. There was no signage but even with a big cover charge and expensive drinks it was the place to go – until the Mirabar re-opened on Allens Avenue and killed it. Sabastian’s opened on Washington Street in 1982, which expanded in 1987 and became Galaxy until it closed in 1996. Blinky’s Video bar opened on Washington Street, which later became Wheels before it became The Stable. The In Town was a popular piano bar with drag queens on Eddy Street. The Yukon Trading Company was also a very hot place. As the decade spun on, you could drink at Gerardo’s at 1 Franklin Square and Perrier’s

across the street. There was the Fan Club and Rockets had a private gay party every Tuesday night. Generation X opened, then became 228 Promenade and then became Kamp. And for the ladies, there was nothing like DeVille’s: the place to be yourself, meet your community, and rally if there were women in need of support.

Remember Donna Summer? Someone left her cake out in the rain? That’s what downtown Providence looked like around 1990. Peerless, Shepherd’s, The Outlet, movie palaces, and merchants saw their loyal customers go out to the malls.

Many places were boarded up, and X-rated bookstores and “gentlemen’s clubs” moved in. Slade’s and then Skipper’s, hustler bars, sat in the shadow of City Hall.

Then came Buddy Cianci and his liaison to the gay community, businessman Fitzgerald Himmelsbach. Cianci, the man who “never stopped caring about Providence,” began a campaign to revitalize the city. He made it more tourist-friendly and more gay-friendly. During this era Rhode Island police had been using sodomy laws to arrest and harass homosexuals. Buddy was instrumental in softening police pressure and harassment. His administration was very open to helping Gina Bartolumucci with the relocation of DeVille’s during the city’s reconstruction, and he could sometimes be seen attending drag shows.

Courtney’s, which opened at the Providence Journal end of Union Street, was turned into Union Street Station and hosted the first Gay Pride Block Party in 1993. The Eagle opened at the

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other end of Union Street and PJ Fitzgerald’s, a piano and drag queen bar, opened right next door. If you were part of the scene during that decade you were also partying at Mirabar, DeVille’s, The Mirage and Galaxy. The Twelve Caesars bar had strippers and entertainment on Aborn Street. You could go out to The Loft in Smithfield, Images in Pawtucket, Tramps, and Pulse, a big disco near RI Hospital that gave the Mirabar a run for its money for five or six years.

Twenty years after my first panicky gay bar experience, a young 26-year-old flight attendant walked into a gay bar for the first time. It was the early 90s. He spotted someone he knew, panicked, and walked right out, as so many had done before him for so many years. Fortunately Michael Slade walked into Gerardo’s and found his way into a new occupation tending bar on his first night out in a gay bar. He eventually moved to The Alley Cat, worked his way into a managerial position for six years, and left to partner in a new venture when Wheels was stripped and transformed into The Stable in 2010. It was the first contemporary gay bar in Providence to feature a large openplate glass window that looked out onto a main street with a big sign, and had customers sitting in the window for everyone to see. The Stable has been voted The Best Gay Bar in RI four years in a row.

Last year The Dark Lady moved down the street and nestled in with a big dance floor and high drag next door to the Alley Cat, which now has a clear window to the street and outdoor seating as well.

The old Eagle and Union Street Station, formerly PJ Fitzgerald’s, closed when RISD bought the building. The 19-yearold Eagle landed on Snow Street: the gayest street in Providence where the Dark Lady used to be which was where the Yukon Trading Company stood for about 30 years after it was the Homestead Café. There’s a sharp new symbol at the door flanked by leather and bear flags and some outdoor seating.

They kept the two red lights over the entrance reminiscent of the days when that was the only way to know you were in the right place. Mikey gave his patrons a more traditional Eagle décor. His underground renovation look of chain link and studs and his outreach are making The Providence Eagle home to

21

leather men and bears from Boston, Worcester, Maine, New Hampshire, and Connecticut. And it doesn’t matter if you wear a wig, a polo or a harness.

The longest running lesbian dance party, host to hundreds of women every Saturday night, originated as Mermaids at Pulse in 2001 and was promoted

by Pam Padula and Lori Green. Mermaids would change names and locations many times over the decade, but largely held onto its staff and regular crowd of hundreds of lesbians every Saturday night.

Mermaids moved to Kamp in The Foundry building in 2005 and was renamed Splash, but that didn’t last long. It was renamed GirlSpot and settled back in at Pulse until a 2006 Christmas Eve shooting (not during the lesbian night) immediately shut the club down. Without skipping a Saturday, GirlSpot found a home at The Gallery where it remained (though with a brief trial run at Club X), until the club was slated for demolition in 2012. GirlSpot went on hiatus and the brand was sold to

22

Chris Harris shortly after he opened EGO. GirlSpot made a comeback in the latter half of 2013 when Harris opened a club above EGO, but that club shut down due to licensing issues.

GirlSpot is now part of Twerk Fridays at EGO, though the staff and crowd have evolved. Meanwhile, women are anticipating the rumored reopening of DeVille’s or perhaps something new.

Speaking of EGO: Chris Harris is casting a wide net to be sure his new club in Providence is where it’s at and where everyone wants to be, whether they are gay or straight. He’s bringing back the 90s nightclub with a big splash of color and neon, dancing, drag, beer busts, celebrities, hot male dancers, and special guests. He and his team are amping it up in their new venue with something for everyone. He is not alone in his outreach for more sophisticated patrons, although he may be the most ambitious.

As gay nightlife becomes less taboo, many mostly-straight establishments will make overtures welcoming the gay dollar.

Coliseum, the Holiday Inn, and Hotel Providence have hosted numerous events, and we’d be remiss if we didn’t mention The Biltmore, whose staff salaries over the years have been partially paid for by Kitty Litter’s charity events.

Now that the lights are on and homosexuals, bisexuals, transsexuals, and haven’t-made-up-my-mind-still-doingresearchers can come further into the light, isn’t it refreshing that in some clubs we can be ourselves in the same place with those who are straight but not narrow? Not to say that we don’t still need our own playgrounds. Prejudice and narrowmindedness still exist. Safety is still a concern, and everyone needs a place to meet their own.

Options | September 2014

We owe a debt of gratitude to our bars and nightclubs.

They stood up fearlessly in a hostile society and opened their doors when homosexuals were considered beneath contempt. Bartenders and bar backs smiled, served us cocktails, laughed at our jokes, listened to our stories, protected us, and helped us meet other people like ourselves.

And they have grown with us over the years.

Gay community flags wave proudly. The on-street seating and large windows that you can see through are now more common. All types of men, women, and men in drag sashay down the street, and as for discretion: Say WHAAT? They host events, sponsor sports teams, and help us raise money for our causes and for those in need. They have made sex, love, friendship, and community possible and served it up in glassware and with a garnish and a smile. Explore. Patronize. Enjoy.

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To all the bar owners, managers, and bartenders who were not mentioned here whose vision, money, courage, and customer care provided a place where all of us could congregate and celebrate who we are: We at Options salute you.

23

AIDS Project RI

AIDS Walk for Life Led by

HIV/AIDS Care Physician

by Christion Battey

Philip Chan

Philip Chan, grew up in Concord, New Hampshire in the 1980s. During those years, long before he became a physician focusing on HIV/ AIDS, there were no good treatments for the disease.

Otherwise young and healthy people were dying.

Now, medications keep people living long and healthy lives. In fact, the life expectancy for a person diagnosed today and on medications is essentially the same as someone without HIV. However, this has led to complacency about HIV, especially among many younger people who have not witnessed the devastation that HIV initially caused before the medications were available.

Chan. “We have a lot more work to do.”

The AIDS Walk theme this year is “Do It Right: Get Tested for HIV & STDs,” (see doitright.org) reflecting the theme of the state’s HIV/ STD prevention campaign kicked off in June by AIDS Project Rhode Island, the Rhode Island Department of Health, The Miriam Hospital, and the Rhode Island Public Health Institute. The walk benefits AIDS Project Rhode Island, a division of Family Service of Rhode Island, and other AIDS service organizations. “Bring the kids, too,” said AIDS Project RI executive director Thomas Bertrand. “It’s a family-friendly event.” More information is available at www.aidsprojectri.org, by emailing Julie@aidsprojectri.org, or by calling 519-2289.

“The fear of the 1980s and 1990s is gone, which is good,” said 36-year-old Chan. “However, we need to continue educating the younger generation, especially gay, bisexual, and other men who have sex with men. This group is at increased risk for HIV. We encourage everyone to get tested routinely. Yes, there have been medical advancements. No, there is no cure. And yes, it can still cause serious medical complications.”

Dr. Chan is director of the HIV/STD Prevention Clinic at The Miriam Hospital Immunology Center, so he sees the terrible effects of the epidemic on a regular basis, which is why leading the AIDS Walk for Life this year is important to him on a very personal level.

He urges young and old alike to join him and many others at the Rhode Island State House on Saturday, September 27, to walk to raise money for HIV/AIDS prevention and services. Walkers will start gathering at 9am, with a speaking program at 10am and the 2.5-mile walk kicking off shortly after, rain or shine. NBC 10’s Alison Bologna will be the emcee, the Providence Gay Men’s Chorus will perform, and there will be rapid, anonymous HIV testing and other activities.

“Prevention is key if we want to get to the state’s goal of zero new cases of HIV or AIDS in five years,” said Dr. Chan. “When you know your status, your treatment can begin quickly to ensure your best quality of life.You also can take steps to ensure you don’t infect anyone else.”

Chan’s clinic is also offering pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), a new pill to prevent HIV infection. People who don’t have HIV take this once daily pill to prevent HIV infection, a significant advance in the fight against HIV. Is he still scared? “Very much so. We’re seeing an increase in HIV in gay and bisexual men, and communities of color are overrepresented. For example, although Hispanics are about 13% of the state’s population, they’re 30% of all HIV cases in recent years,” said Dr.

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Options | September 2014

SAGE-RI

by Sally Ann Hay

Brunch Time!

Please join us for Life at the Tipping Point, SAGE-RI’s 2014 annual meeting and brunch on Saturday, September 20. We’re looking forward to sharing news, ideas, aspirations, opportunities, and programs. It has been an amazing year! Help us as we begin making plans for the coming year and find out how you can get involved. This gathering will also give us the opportunity to honor Lt. Governor Elizabeth Roberts for her remarkable support and leadership in improving the lives of LGBT people in RI. There will be plenty of time to enjoy brunch and to talk with old and new friends. The event will be from 11am-1pm, at Chelo’s Hometown Bar & Grille, 2225 Post Road, Warwick. A $15 donation to support education and outreach programs is requested. Checks should be made payable to SAGE-RI, 235 Promenade Street, Suite 500, Box 18, Providence, RI 02908.

Tell Us a Story Nothing can compare with a personal story to convey a message. SAGE-RI has data from national and local studies to detail the unique challenges faced by LGBT older people, but what we need is a cache of real life stories from members of RI’s LGBT elder community to bring the facts to life. What has the aging process been like for you? What are some of the highlights? And some of the negative experiences? Is there an illustrative story you are willing to share about your experience with medical professionals? If you live in senior housing, assisted living or a nursing home, what has been your experience with your neighbors? Are you out to your medical providers, your neighbors, others? If you are, how has that gone? If you aren’t, why not?

We would be delighted to hear from you. We would so appreciate your help reaching out to others who may not be likely to read this article. We can promise anonymity. If you are interested and willing to share your story, please check out our contact information below and be in touch. Thank you!

Civics Lesson There are those among us – you know who you are – who question the purpose of a Lt. Governor in RI and who, as a result, don’t think much about that particular campaign. This

Options | September 2014

year will be a little different, as one of our favorite sons happens to be running for the office. But beyond how cool it would be to have an out gay man elected again to state office, we want to make the point that the person who does get elected to the office of Lt. Governor could make a big difference in the lives of all RI LGBT people. Under the leadership of Lt. Governor Elizabeth Roberts, several initiatives are underway that directly affect access to appropriate services for RI’s transgender and older LGBT populations. Work on these initiatives benefits all RI LGBT people and will continue regardless of the outcome of the elections; but the next Lt. Governor will have a significant impact on the rate of progress and the depth of the reforms that can be achieved. The takeaway? Be sure to ask the candidates where they stand on these issues and then make sure you vote – in the September 9 primary and again in the general election on November 4.

SAGE-RI (Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders) addresses issues of concern to LGBT elders and is an organization of diverse people of all ages. For information on programs or to join SAGE-RI, drop us a line at sageriinfo@gmail.com; leave us a message at (401) 528-3259; write to us at 235 Promenade St., Suite 500, Box 18, Providence, RI 02908, or find us on Facebook as SAGE/Rhode Island.

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News from AIDS Care Ocean State

by Chris Dalpe

Drag Yourself to Drag Bingo Get those daubers ready folks because Bingo is back!

Gay Bingo, now going by “Drag Bingo,” returns for the 2014-15 season bigger, louder, and chock-full of amazing giveaways, prizes, and drag queen antics. We’re talking over $2,000 in cash and prizes awarded every month.

Join us as we welcome back our girls: your host, the Drag Diva of Providence, Miss Kitty Litter, and Official Ball Puller and YouTube sensation, Miss Haley Star. You

can also find them on Cox Cable talking about Drag Bingo this season.

Drag Bingo happens on the third Thursday of every month at the Riviera Bingo Palace (1612 Elmwood Ave., Cranston). Doors open at 6pm. Games start at 7pm sharp. It’s $20 and 18+ to play. Every Bingo has a theme, and prizes are awarded for best costumes and to contest winners. The first Bingo on September 18 is the “Dress in Drag” contest and we want to see what you’ve got.

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Here’s our 2014-2015 Bingo schedule: • 9/18: Dress in Drag Contest • 10/16: Halloween Costume Party • 11/20: Pie Eating Contest • 12/18: Martha Stewart Craft Bingo • 1/5: Pajama Party Bingo • 2/9: Heaven & Hell Bingo • 3/19: A Lil’ Bit Country & a Lil’ Bit Rock n’ Roll Bingo • 4/16: Spring Break Beach Party • 5/21: Hillbilly Bingo • 6/18: Gay Pride Bingo Find out why all your friends have been screaming “Lunch!” Don’t miss a Bingo this season. Grab a friend, or grab a whole table of folks, and join us for the most fun you can have with $20. Gay Bingo is a fundraiser for ACOS, so all money raised from the evening goes directly to support HIV/AIDS services. Just by attending, playing, and winning big, you’re supporting individuals and families who are affected by HIV/AIDS in Rhode Island. How cool is that? For more info, visit aidscareos. org/bingo.

Bidding Begins for ArtBeat 2014 Log on to aidscareos.org. Bid early and bid often because you’re not going to want to miss what we’re auctioning off for ArtBeat this year: fabulous, one-ofa-kind art, antiques, vacations, travel packages, jewelry, home goods, and gift certificates galore! Every dollar raised in the online auction goes directly to support AIDS Care Ocean State’s programs and services. So you’re not only bidding to win, you’re also bidding for good.

Hundreds of local Rhode Island-based artists, businesses, and organizations have donated amazing items, products, and services. They’re posted on our website, ready for online bidding to begin. This annual auction has been raising money for HIV/AIDS services for nearly two decades. There are plenty of items featured exclusively online that will not be in the live Options | September 2014

and silent auction at the event October 24. Ready to start bidding? Go to aidscareos.org now and you’ll be directed to our full catalog of items.

We are still accepting donations to ArtBeat 2014.

Learn how to donate items at aidscareos.org/artbeat.

If you’d like to become a sponsor of ArtBeat please feel free to contact Stephen Hartley at stephenh@ aidscareos.org.

Introducing the 2014 ArtBeat Featured Artists On October 24, the live and silent ArtBeat auction will be held at the Biltmore Hotel in downtown Providence. Every year we highlight artists who are doing amazing work in their respected fields and who support our mission. AIDS Care Ocean State is honored to announce that the iconic Rhode Islandbased designer Kent Stetson and the internationally renowned Havi Schanz will be joining us as our 2014 ArtBeat Featured Artists.

Kent Stetson pushes the boundaries of art, design, and fashion by combining traditional craft with technological innovation. Best known for his sexy, sleek, and ultra-modern handbags, Stetson is in high demand and expanding his field. “I believe that a great handbag can engage people the same way as art,” says Stetson.

After studying the sciences at Brown University, Stetson took an interest in new media and hybrid digital/ traditional fine art. In 2003, as a framing experiment, he presented one of his digital paintings as a handbag and has since made bags for collectors throughout the world. His work has sold in over 70 stores and many of the nation’s top juried fine craft shows. Stetson has been featured in RI Monthly, The Providence Journal, Providence Phoenix, and Providence Monthly, and has been a guest on The Rhode Show to discuss his work and vision. For more info, visit kentstetson.com Born in Argentina, Havi Schanz now lives in Miami Beach and has almost 30 years of combined experience as an artist, architect, interior and graphic designer. Havi’s art has been widely exhibited in several solo and group exhibitions in Argentina, Venezuela, Colombia, United Kingdom, Italy, France, Spain, Czech Republic, Germany, Greece, Australia, Mexico, and the United States.

Havi’s background in architecture is distinctly evident in his celebrity portraits, which utilize impressionistic, romantic, and baroque influences, culminating in a unique representation of pop culture iconography.

Philanthropic by nature, Havi has donated his art to benefit such noteworthy charitable organizations as Children’s Autism Foundation, Human Rights Campaign, Lions Club, Make a Wish Foundation, and Unicorn Children’s Foundation. Havi’s work is currently displayed in the homes of celebrities Donald Trump, Pamela Anderson, and Latino pop sensation, Diego Torres. For more info, visit haviart.com.

Options | September 2014

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Youth Pride Inc.

by Kerri Kanelos Donors and Volunteers Needed for Food Drives

Annual Gala October 17 Please join us for our annual fundraiser on Friday, October 17, at the Crowne Plaza in Warwick. This year’s theme is Cabaret! and will include some exciting live performances. A cocktail reception and silent auction will be held from 5:30-7pm and dinner, awards, and dancing will follow until 11pm. This year, we will be celebrating the following Youth Pride Inc. honorees: -

Honorary Chair: Jacqueline DiMera

-

Founders Award: Dr. Lauren Nocera

- Lipsky/Whittaker Award: Providence College’s Feinstein Institute for Public Service -

Luis Pagan Award: Jesus Holguin

For more info or to purchase tickets, please visit our event website at youthprideri.org/event.

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Did you know that Youth Pride Inc. hosts a small food pantry for youth who are in need of assistance? For youth who are struggling to find employment or who are bouncing from house to house, food assistance from our pantry goes a long way. We also provide after-school snacks and a familystyle dinner every Wednesday night for all of our participants.

These services would not be possible without the generosity of volunteers who hold food drives for our pantry and donors who sponsor the purchase of food. Food drives are a great way to get your friends, family, sports teams, co-workers, social groups, book clubs, etc. involved in an easy, feel-good activity.

If you are interested in holding a food drive for Youth Pride Inc. or in making a monetary donation so we can purchase food, please contact us at 421-5626.

Youth Pride Inc. provides support, education, and advocacy for LGBTQQ young people ages 13-23. Our Drop-in Center is at 473 Westminster Street, Providence, RI 02903. Visit www.youthprideri. org, email info@youthprideri.org, or call (401) 421-5626 for more info.

Options | September 2014

New School Year Challenges Trans* Students

by Ethan Comtois, TGI Network As the summer draws can feel like drowning in anxiety, hurt, and anger, and it is just to a close and we prepare one of the many micro-aggressions that shape each school day. for another school year – Those of us who were lucky found ways to navigate the school as parents, teachers, and halls and found friends and allies along the way, but each new students – gender identity school year brought a fresh batch of teachers and challenges to might not be our top concern. weather.

The college students among When I transitioned from female to male, I did so as a us might be most concerned high school teacher, so I speak intimately about schools as with a heavy course load or battlegrounds where identities are forged in painful and the cost of books. Teenagers challenging ways. I have faced difficult moments throughout my might be worried about how transition. I have also seen students and coworkers embrace they’ll juggle work, sports, change. I have seen them open their minds to understanding and homework this fall, or folks who experience the world differently from them. My maybe just what they’ll wear on the first day of school. For experience transitioning in a school made me more aware of those of us who are transgender or gender-variant, the return the nuanced influence of gender over our interactions, as my to school can include all of these worries, excitements, and position within the faculty and the ways my students related to more. For some, it is a yearly event fraught with anxiety. me changed. My greatest discovery in this process, however, has Those in the LGBTQI community certainly don’t need been the chance to see cisgender students and teachers come a reminder from me that schools are not always the safe to recognize this influence, and begin to challenge one another havens we might want them to be. Bullying has been a national to create a safer and more welcoming place for all members of headline for the past few the school community.

When I transitioned from female to years, but it is certainly At the start of this nothing new. Youth have a male, I did so as a high school teacher, school year, I present to you a way of establishing social simple mission: do your part to so I speak intimately about schools order that is incredibly challenge the status quo. Teach as battlegrounds where identities are your children that there is not powerful and is often quite cruel. And gender forged in painful and challenging ways. one way to be a man, woman, nonconformity is a major girl, or boy, and that all people catalyst for harassment. We deserve your respect. Stand up to your peers when they harass know what it was like as young people to be different; or we those whose gender identity or expression does not conform know what that one kid in our class did to be picked on so to society’s expectations. We have come far but we still have a mercilessly. Perhaps he was the shy, quiet boy who was an easy great distance to go to ensure that our students are safe. target in the dodgeball game. Or maybe she was the tomboy And for those who face this school year with trepidation, who dressed differently from the rest of the girls. Cloaked in know you are not alone. We are at a cultural turning point, the guise of homophobia (as words like “fag” and “dyke” were where transgender and gender-variant people are gaining often hurled at these kids), this harassment was based on a lack visibility in the media. I believe that we will see a major shift of conformity to gender roles. They simply weren’t playing the towards acceptance and understanding in the coming years. parts written for them.

Indeed, I have benefited from this shift firsthand. Despite these Dealing with a new school year, however, is not just an advances, schools still remain isolating places for those of us exercise in avoiding bullies. One of the things I dreaded as a who do not fit the mold. child was something that happened almost every day: “All right, TGI Network of Rhode Island is the only statewide organization class, boys line up on the right, girls on the left.” At the time, I providing support, advocacy, and education for the transgender, knew that I was supposed to line up with the girls, but I also gender-variant, and intersex community. Incorporated in 2011, our knew that a new teacher to whom I was a stranger would look mission is to be a resource for TGI people navigating their lives from me to the class roster and back. If she or he thought I was and the medical and legal systems; to serve as a resource for a class clown, I might get publicly shamed, told to follow rules I professionals working with TGI people; and to serve as a liaison was indeed following. If I was lucky, I would be the only one who between the TGI and LGB communities and the community at noticed this little embarrassment, but you can be certain that large. Visit us at www.tginetwork.org.

I would notice. For many transgender boys and girls, this ritual

Options | September 2014

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Resources

Options originated in 1982 as the offical newsletter of the Rhode Island Gay Task Force. Editor Jos Fayette explained, “The RIGTF wants to make the homosexual community aware of their options as gay men and women in Rhode Island. And it’s only because we live, work, love and play in this state that there are such a large number of options available to all of us.” Options has always, and will continue to print LGBTQ resources so that you can, as Fayette went on to say, “Exercise your OPTIONS today to make positive changes in your life tomorrow.”

Help us help you! Email info@optionsri.org if you come across a resource listing that needs updating. Phone numbers are in the 401 area code and addresses are in RI, unless otherwise indicated.

Addiction Support Groups AA Brothers in Sobriety: Saturday 7:30pm. 372 Wayland Avenue, Providence. 751-9328.

Alcohol/Drug Helpline: RI Council on Alcoholism & Drug Dependence. 24hr. (866) 252-3784.

RI LGBT AA Group: Tuesdays 7-8pm. The Wellness Company,132A George M Cohan Blvd., Providence.

All are welcome.

Set Them Free: Narcotics Anonymous open discussion group. Wednesdays 7:30-9pm. Anchor Recovery Community Center, 249 Main Street, Pawtucket. 721-5100. info@anchorrecovery.org. www.anchorrecovery.org.

Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous: 12-step program.

Fridays at 7pm. Providence Presbyterian Church, 500 Hope Street, Providence, side entrance, downstairs to the left. Gay, but all are welcome.

AIDS/Health Resources AFIA Center for Health & Wholeness: Meals, food pantry, HIV support groups, recovery groups, recreational and social activities. Sponsored by AIDS Project RI. Free to clients. Wednesday and Thursday 12-3pm. Mathewson Street Church, 134 Mathewson Street, Providence. Contact Gordon Cooper at 331-1350 ext. 3268. info@uwri. org. www.familyserviceri.org.

AIDS Action Hotline: MA only. (800) 235-2331 www.aac.org.

AIDS Care Ocean State: Confidential HIV & HEP C testing, safer-sex supplies, case management, emergency funds, clinical services, assisted and supportive housing for people living with HIV/AIDS, street outreach, ENCORE, HIV+ support groups. Speaker’s Bureau, 18 Parkis Ave., Providence. 521-3603 (call 781-0665 to schedule an appointment). www.aidscareos.org.

AIDS Project RI: Division of Family Service of RI. Case management, buddies, COBRA and dental services, emergency fund, mental health counseling, nutrition support, assessment and referral, wellness programs, advocacy, strength training, prevention education, HIV testing. 9 Pleasant Street, Providence. 831-5522 www.aidsprojectri.org.

AIDS Quilt RI: Displays local AIDS memorial quilt pan-

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els, panel-making programs including Anna’s Workshop, HIV/AIDS education for young people. PO Box 2591, Newport. 434-4880. admin@aidsquiltri.org.www.aidsquiltri.org.

Brown University AIDS Program: Clinical trials, public policy, research, lectures, conferences, patient and community education. 121 South Main Street, Second Floor, Providence. 863-6790. brunap@brown.edu. brown.edu/ Departments/BRUNAP. Community Care Alliance: Case management, support, personal care items for people living with HIV/AIDS in northern Rhode Island. 245 Main Street, Woonsocket.

235-6092. lcohen@famresri.org.

Comprehensive Community Action Programs: Medical, mental health, dental, social services, LGBT outreach.

311 Doric Avenue, Cranston. Also Coventry, Pawtucket, and Warwick. 467-9610.

Gabriel Care, LLC: Nursing/social worker case management and financial compensation for assistance and supervision for those living with HIV. MassHealth funded for MA residents. 376 South Main Street, Fall River, MA. Contact Jenn. (508) 678-1002.

HIV Antibody Testing: Anonymous. Free or sliding scale. RI Department of Health. Providence, Newport and other locations. 222-2320.

Home and Hospice Care of RI: Medical care management for HIV/AIDS. 24hr nursing staff for treatment.

1085 North Main Street, Providence. Referrals: 782-0725.

Bereavement groups: Contact John Charette. 727-7079.

Main Office: 415-4200 or toll-free 800-338-6555.www. hhcri.org.

House of Compassion: HIV/AIDS housing. 2510 Mendon Road, Cumberland. 658-3992.

LGBT Caregiver Online Support Group: For LGBTs caring for someone with chronic health problems. www. caregiver.org Luis E. Martinez House CHS, Inc.: Supportive, permanent housing for 10 adults living with HIV/AIDS and/ or substance abuse. New Bedford, MA. Contact Joe Taylor.

(508) 984-7514.

Partners in Learning About AIDS: Outreach to miOptions | September 2014

norities, women of color and LGBT community at clubs and other locations. North Providence office provides free condoms and information about STIs and post-exposure prophylaxis for HIV. 1006 Charles Street, Suite 5, North Providence. 484-7523. info@plaidsproject.org. www.plaidsproject.org.

Project Weber: Services for male sex workers. Drop-in center, support groups, HIV and Hep C testing, clean needles. 383-4888. www.projectweber.org.

SSTAR (Stanley Street Treatment & Resources): Counseling, drug treatment, detox, domestic violence programs, free and confidential HIV, HEP C and STD testing, education, case management and support. MA and RI locations. Main location: 386 Stanley Street, Fall River, MA. (508) 679-5222. Project Aware (HIV/HCV).

(508) 324-3561. Family Healthcare Center (508) 675-1054. www.sstar.org.

Steppingstone, Inc.: Welcome Home Medical case management program. One-on-one peer support in Somerset to Wareham area. HIV support groups available. Free and open to any HIV+ person 18+. 5 Dover Street, New Bedford, MA. (508) 9847514. www.steppingstoneinc.org.

Tranquil Mind & Wellness: Counseling, alternative healing, yoga, Pilates, meditation.109 Rhode Island Road, Lakeville, MA. (508) 947-1683. www.tranquilmind.net.

Thundermist Health Center: Provides HIV/AIDS ser-

Options | September 2014

vices including medical care and treatment by an HIV specialist, dental care, behavioral health counseling, nutritional assessment and counseling, pharmacy consultation, free and confidential HIV testing. 450 Clinton Street, Woonsocket. Contact Philip Kane. 767-4100 ext. 3516.

Information/Education The Center for Sexual Pleasure & Health: Education, pleasure, health, advocacy. Thursday-Saturday 12-6pm and by appointment. 250 Main Street, Unit 1, Pawtucket. 4895513. www.thecsph.org.

Fenway Community Center LGBT Helpline: Support, information and referrals. Fenway Community Health Center, Boston. Open daily 6-11pm. (617) 2679001 or 888-340-4528.

GLBT National Help Center Hotline: Local resources nationwide provided by social services agency. 888-8434564. www.glbtnationalhelpcenter.org.

Newport Out: LGBT website for Newport. www.newportout.com.

RILGBT-NEWS: Low-volume email distribution list for LGBT & AIDS news from RI. Not a discussion list. To subscribe:tinawood@cox.net.

United Way of RI Referral Line: 2-1-1 Nightlife The Alley Cat Providence: Downtown neighborhood bar. Monday-Thursday 3pm-1am, Friday 3pm-2am, Saturday 2pm-2am, Sunday 2pm-1am. 17 Snow Street, Providence. 272-6369.

Bobby’s Place: Dancing, pool, video lounge, karaoke.

Sunday-Wednesday 5pm-1am, Thursday-Saturday 5pm2am. 62 Weir Street, Taunton, MA. (508) 824-9997. www.bobbysplacema.com.

Brooklyn Coffee Tea House: Special events space, film screenings and other public and private events. Open mic first and third Saturday 8:30-10:30pm. 209 Douglas Ave, Providence. 521-2095. www.brooklyncoffeeteahouse.com Club Body Center: Gay men’s sauna. Membership required. One-day pass available. Open 24hr. 257 Weybosset Street, Providence. 274-0298. www.clubbodycenter.com.

The Dark Lady: Downtown bar and nightclub. TuesdayThursday 9pm-1am, Friday & Saturday 9pm-3am, Sunday 9pm-1am. 17 Snow Street, Providence. 272-6369.

EGO: Providence’s newest gay nightlife performance/ event space. Sunday and Thursday 9pm-1am, Friday and Saturday 10pm-3am, 73 Richmond St, Providence. 3831208. www.egopvd.com.

KiKi at Lola’s: 18+ lesbian dance party. Sundays 9pm1am, Lola’s Cantina, 525 South Water Street, Providence.

383-0220. www.facebook.com/kiki.lolas.58.

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Mirabar: Downtown bar and nightclub. Monday-Thursday 3pm-1am, Friday and Saturday 3pm-2am, Sunday 3pm-1am. 15 Elbow Street, Providence. 331-6761. www.mirabar.com.

Providence Eagle: Leather, Levi, bear cruise bar. Monday-Thursday 2pm-1am, Friday 2pm-2am, Saturday-Sunday 12pm-2am. 124 Snow Street, Providence. 421-1447.

The Stable: Downtown video bar. No cover. MondayThursday 2pm-1am, Friday 2pm-2am, Saturday 12pm2am, Sunday 12pm-1am. 125 Washington Street, Providence. 272-6950.

Political & Legal Groups American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU): 128 Dorrance Street, Suite 220, Providence. 831-7171. riaclu.org.

Amnesty International OUTfront: Program to campaign globally for LGBTIQ human rights. (212) 807-8400.

Cvohs18904@yahoo.com. www.amnestyusa.org.

Brown University Queer Alliance: Student advocacy and support organization. queer@brown.edu.

Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders (GLAD): LGBT/HIV legal info hotline. Weekdays 1:30-4:30pm. 30 Winter Street, Suite 800, Boston, MA. (617) 436-1350 or (800) 455-GLAD. gladlaw@glad.org www.GLAD.org.

Lambda Legal Defense & Education Fund: 120 Wall Street, Suite 1500, NY. (212) 809-8585. www.lambdalegal.org.

Lawyers for Equality and Diversity (LEAD): Advocates for LGBT causes. lawyersforequality@gmail.com.

The Next Thing (TNT): Political and support group for queer people of color located at Brown University. 8633062. tnt@brown.edu.

RI Commission on Prejudice and Bias: Hate crime awareness training program. www.hatecrimeri.org.

RI Socialist Action: 952-5385, adgagneri@gmail.com Spanish: 351-3514, walsil@cox.net Thanks.

RI Human Rights Commission: Anti-discrimination law enforcement agency with jurisdiction in employment, housing, public accommodations and credit.

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180 Westminster Street, 3rd floor, Providence. 222-2662 TTY: 222-2664, richr.ri.gov.

Servicemembers Legal Defense Network: Serving LGBT military personnel and veterans. PO Box 65301, Washington DC. (202) 328-3244. or (800) 538-7418. sldn@sldn.org. www.sldn.org.

Religious & Spiritual All Saints Memorial Church: 674 Westminster Street, Providence. 751-1747. asmcri@verizon.net. www.allsaintsmemorial.org.

Amicable Congregational Church: UCC. Open & Affirming. Pastor William Sterrett. Sunday 10am. 3736 Main Road, Tiverton. 624-4611. amicablechurch@aol.com, www.amicablechurch.org.

Association of Welcoming & Affirming Baptists: robin@awab.org, www.awab.org.

Barrington Congregational Church: UCC. “The white church.” Sundays 10am 461 County Road, Barrington.

246-0111. office@bccucc.org, www.bccucc.org.

Bell Street Chapel: Unitarian Universalist. A welcoming congregation. Rev. Ann Willever. Sundays 10am. 5 Bell Street, Providence. 273-5678. www.bellstreetchapel.org.

Beneficent Congregational Church: UCC. An Open & Affirming congregation in the heart of Providence.

Co-Pastors Todd & Nicole Yonkman. Sundays 10am.

300 Weybosset Street, Providence. 331-9844. BeneficentChurchUCC@gmail.com, www.beneficentchurch.org.

Berean Baptist Church: A safe and welcoming place for all God’s children. Sunday 10am. 474 Chapel Street, Harrisville. 568-5411.bereanbaptist@verizon.net, www.bereanri.org.

Calvary United Methodist Church of Middletown: LGBTQ early dementia support group. Contact Amy. Sundays 10:30am. 200 Turner Road, Middletown. 847-6181, www.middletownmethodist.com.

Central Congregational Church: UCC. An Opening & Affirming Congregation. Sundays 10:30am. 296 Angell Street, Providence. 331-1960. www.centralchurch.us.

Channing Memorial Church: Unitarian Universalist. A Welcoming Congregation. Sundays 10am. 135 Pelham Street, Newport. 846-0643. administrator@channingchurch.org www.channingchurch.org.

Charter Oak Grove ADF: An Open and Welcoming Congregation of Neo-pagan Druids in CT. charteroakadf@gmail.com, www.charteroakadf.org.

Christ Church in Lonsdale: Episcopal. 1643 Lonsdale Avenue, Lincoln. Services 8am and 10:30am. 725-1920. office@christchurchlincoln.org, www.christchurchlincoln.org.

Church of the Epiphany: A diverse Open & Affirming Episcopal congregation. 1336 Pawtucket Avenue, East Options | September 2014

Providence. 434-5012. info@epiphanyep.org, www.epiphanyep.org.

Church of the Holy Paraclete: Independent Old Catholic. Fr. Jakob Lazarus. Sunday 6pm. 155 Douglas Avenue, Providence. 218-0706. www.holyparaclete.org.

Edgewood Congregational Church: UCC. Open & Affirming. Service 10am. 1788 Broad Street, Cranston.

461-1344. office@edgewoodchurchri.org. www.edgewoodchurchri.org.

Emmanuel Episcopal Church: Sundays 8 and 9:30am.

120 Nate Whipple Highway, Cumberland. 658-1506. office@emmanuelri.org. www.emmanuelri.org.

First Congregational Church in Bristol: An Open and Affirming Congregation. Pastor Dan Randall. 281 High Street, Bristol. 253-7288 www.fccbristol.org.

First Unitarian Church: A welcoming congregation.

Sunday 10:30am. 1 Benevolent Street, Providence.

421-7970. admin@firstunitarianprov.org, www.firstunitarianprov.org.

First Unitarian Church: Service 11am. 71 8th Street, New Bedford, MA. (508) 994-9686. admin@uunewbedford.org, www.uunewbedford.org.

First Universalist Society: UU. Welcoming congregation. Same-gender weddings. 262 Chestnut Street, Franklin, MA. (508) 528-5348. fusf@verizon.net www.fusf.org.

Foxboro Universalist Church: UUA. Service 10am. 6 Bird Street, Foxboro, MA. 508-543-4002. chair@uufoxborough.org, www.uufoxborough.org.

Grace Episcopal Church in Providence: 175 Mathewson Street, Providence. 331-3225. hello@gracechurchprovidence.org, www.gracechurchprovidence.org.

Immanuel Lutheran Church: A Reconciling in Christ congregation. Pastor Sandra Demmler D’Amico. 647 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA. (508) 222-2898. www.immanuellc.org.

Interweave at Channing Memorial UU Church: A membership organization for the spiritual, political and social well-being of LGBTQ persons, and their allies, con-

Options | September 2014

fronting oppression. 135 Pelham Street, Newport.

846-0643.

Mathewson St. Church: United Methodist. 134 Mathewson Street, Providence. 331-8900.

MathewsonStUMC@gmail.com.

Mercy of God Community: Christian, inclusive religious order. mercycomm@yahoo.com, www.mgc.org.

Murray Unitarian Universalist Church: Marriage and commitment ceremonies for all. Rev. Bob McKetchnie.

505 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA. (508) 222-0505 www.murrayuuchurch.org.

Newman Congregational Church: Open & Affirming.

100 Newman Avenue, Rumford. 434-4742. www.newmanucc.org.

Newport Congregational Church: UCC. Open & Affirming. Rev. Hayes and Rev. Baker. 73 Pelham Street, Newport. 849-2238.

Park Place Congregational Church: 71 Park Place, Pawtucket. 726-2800. office@ppucc.necoxmail.com, www.parkplaceucc.com.

The Pub Church: A church that meets in a pub! Open & Affirming. Location may change. Saturday 5pm. The Dugout, 722 Commonwealth Avenue, Boston, MA. thepubchurch@gmail.com.

Pilgrim Lutheran Church: An inclusive congregation.

Sundays 8 and 9:30am. 1817 Warwick Avenue, Warwick.

739-2937. parishasst@pilgrimlutheranri.org, pilgrimlutheranri.jimdo.com.

Pilgrim United Church of Christ: Open and Affirming.

635 Purchase Street, New Bedford, MA. (508)-997-9086.

Riverside Church: UCC.15 Oak Avenue, Riverside. Service 10am. 433-2039. www.rcc-ucc.com.

St. Augustine’s Church and Episcopal Center at URI: 15 Lower College Road, Kingston. 783-2153. Sundays 8am and 10am. StAugustinesChurch@necoxmail.com, www.staugustineuri.org.

St. James Church: Episcopal. 474 Fruit Hill Avenue, North Providence. 353-2079.

St. Martin’s Episcopal Church: Sundays 8 and 10am.

50 Orchard Street, Providence. 751-2141. StMartinsNB. Secretary@gmail.com, www.stmartinsprov.org.

St. Martin’s Episcopal Church: Welcoming Church.

Monthly LGBT Eucharist. 136 Rivet Street, New Bedford, MA. (508)994-8972. stmartins1887@comcast.com, www.stmartinsma.org.

St. Paul’s Episcopal Church: Sundays 9am. 50 Park Place, Pawtucket. 728-4300. office@stpaulspawtucket.org, www.stpaulspawtucket.org.

St. Paul’s Church: A welcoming Episcopal church. Sundays 9am. 2679 East Main Street, Portsmouth. 683-1164. stpaulsportsmouthri.org.

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St. Peter & St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church: 25 Pomona Avenue, Providence. 272-9649. stpanda25@verizon.net, stpeters-standrews.org.

Saint Therese Old Catholic Church: Open & Affirming. Fr. David Martins. Sunday 10:30am. 134 Mathewson Street, Providence. 680-9076. stocc134@gmail.com, www.saintthereseocc.org.

Second Congregational Church of Attleboro: UCC. Open & Affirming. 50 Park Street, Attleboro, MA. Sunday 10am. (508) 222-4677. office2nd@verizon.net, www.attleborosecondchurch.org.

Seekonk Congregational Church: Rev. Joy Utter. Sundays 9am. 600 Fall River Avenue, Seekonk, MA. (508) 3369355. sccucc@verizon.net, www.scc-ucc.com Soka Gakkai: Buddhist association for peace, culture, and education. Contact for weekly meetings in Providence.

930 Commonwealth Avenue, Boston. (617) 264-2000. www.sgi-usa.org.

Temple Agudas Achim: Reconstructionist congregation.

901 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA. (508) 222-2243. office@agudasma.org, www.agudasma.org.

Temple Beth-El: Rabbi Sarah E. Mack. 70 Orchard Avenue, Providence. 331-6070. info@temple-beth-el.org, www.temple-beth-el.org.

Temple Emanu-El: A welcoming conservative congregation. Rabbi Wayne Franklin. 99 Taft Avenue, Providence.

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331-1616. info@teprov.org, www.teprov.org.

Temple Habonim: A warm, welcoming Reform congregation. Rabbi Andrew Klein. 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. 245-6536. office@templehabonim.org, www. templehabonim.org.

Temple Sinai: A welcoming Reform temple. Rabbi Peter Stein, 30 Hagen Avenue, Cranston. 942-8350. webmaster@templesinairi.org, www.templesinairi.org.

Unitarian Church in Fall River: Sunday 10:30am. 309 North Main Street, Fall River, MA. 508-678-9700. office@unitarianchurchfr.org, www.unitarianchurchfr.org.

Unitarian Universalist Society of Fairhaven: Service 10:30am. 102 Green Street, Fairhaven, MA. (508) 992-7081.www.uufairhaven.org.

Unitarian Universalist Congregation of South County: 27 North Road, Peace Dale. 783-4170 or Val 789-7282. uucscri@yahoo.com. www.uusouthcountyri.org.

Westminster Unitarian Universalist Church: A UUA Welcoming Congregation. 119 Kenyon Avenue, East Greenwich. 884-5933. www.westminsteruu.org.

Social Organizations Bear Providence: Monthly social events for the bear community. www.bearprovidence.com.

Bisexual Resource Center: PO Box 170796, Boston, MA. (617) 424-9595. brc@bicresource.net www.biresource.net.

Biversity Boston: Mixed-gender social events for Boston and the surrounding area. (617) 424-9595. biversity-subscribe@biversity.org, www.biversity.org.

Boston Bisexual Women’s Network: Social activities including monthly brunches, coming out groups and quarterly newsletter “Bi Woman Quarterly.” www.biwomenboston.org.

Bears Ocean State (BOS): Informal e-group for gay & bisexual bear-identified and-affiliated men for friendly companionship. All welcome. groups.yahoo.com/group/bearsoceanstate.

Cape and Islands Gay & Straight Youth Alliance (CIGSYA): 56 Barnstable Road, Hyannis, MA. (508) 7787744. info@cisgsya.org, www.cigsya.org.

Communisong: For unity through song. Non-performance monthly singing session. www.communisong.net.

CORISMA: Potluck get-togethers for couples from RI and southeast MA. corismainfo@comcast.net, www.corismagroup.org.

Defenders/Providence: Leather/Levi club. Third Sunday, 6pm. PO Box 41153, Providence.

Imperial Court of RI at Providence: Drag and nondrag performers raise funds for local charities. First Monday. All welcome. RI Pride Office,1005 Main Street #1105, Options | September 2014

Pawtucket. PO Box 6583, Providence. icri.prov@gmail. com. www.icriprov.org.

Mixed Borders Gardening Group: Gardening and more. Monthly meetings, all welcome.

Mixedborders@cox.net. www.MixedBorders.com.

Opera Club: Enjoy hearing and attending. Last Sunday of each month at 1pm. BrettCornellpi4@aol.com.

Providence Gay Men’s Chorus: New season rehearsals begin in January and August. Singers and non-singing volunteers welcome. Monday 7-9:30pm. Beneficent Church, 300 Weybosset Street, Providence. www.provgmc.org.

RI Association of Gay Professionals: Professional networking and philanthropy. riagp.com.

RI Parents Pride: Gay parents socializing together with their children. Contact Melanie. 464-2288. saphicangel120@yahoo.com.

RI Pride: Open house 4th Wednesdays. Festival & Parade 3rd Saturday in June. Mail: PO Box 1082, Providence.

Office: 1005 Main Street #1105 Pawtucket. 467-2130. info@prideri.com, www.prideri.com.

RI Prime Timers: Social and networking group for gay and bisexual men 40 and older. Second Sunday. Contact Steve. 996-3010. www.riprimetimers.org.

RI Skeptics Society: Yearning to talk with someone rational? Refreshing discussion. Fourth Saturday. East Providence restaurant location. www.meetup.com/skeptics-133/.

RI Women’s Association: Lesbian social group. 21+.

Dances & events. www.riwa.net.

SAGE/RI (Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders): Advocacy, education and social events for LGBTQ seniors. 235 Promenade Street, Suite 500, Box 18, Providence. 528-3259. sageriinfo@gmail.com.

SEMASSMEN: Social group for GBQ men of southeastern MA & RI to foster strong friendships.

Semassmen-subscribe@yahoogroups.com. rlevass@yahoo.com.

Yankee Lambda Car Club: Regional club for GLBT vintage & specialty car enthusiasts. www.yankeelcc.com.

Options | September 2014

Sports PrideSports Boston: Network of twenty-plus gay sports leagues/teams in Boston area. www.pridesportsboston.com.

Boston Gay BASKETBALL League: ksg.bgbl@gmail.com, www.bgbl.com.

Big Gay Al’s Duckpin BOWLING League: Proceeds benefit AIDS causes. Tuesday 6:30pm. 1463 Atwood Avenue, Town Hall Lanes, Johnston. Contact Frank Ferri.

831-6940. www.bgalbowling.com. www.townhalllanes.com.

FLAG (For Lesbians and Gays) FOOTBALL: Bostonbased recreational football club. All skill levels are encouraged to participate. Saturday mornings in the fall and spring. www.flagflagfootball.com.

Boston Pride HOCKEY: www.bostonpridehockey.org.

Rondeaus KICKBOXING: 272-5425. www.rondeauskickboxing.com.

Main Street MARTIAL ARTS: Non-profit. Welcoming dojo and community center. 1282 North Main Street, Providence. 274-7672.www.mainstma.org.

Chiltern Mountain Club: OUTDOOR recreation club in New England. events@chiltern.org. www.chiltern.org.

Boston Gay ROWERS: Worldwide online community for gay and lesbian rowers, coxies, coaches, and race officials. www.glrf.org.

Boston Ironsides RUGBY Football Club: www.bostonironsides.org.

Frontrunners Rhode Island RUNNING Group: Running and walking group. Newcomers welcome. Meet at the end of Blackstone Boulevard at Hope Street, Providence. Thursday 6pm. Contact Brian. 751-7643. bripm@cox.net, frontrunnersri@gmail.com Frontrunners Boston RUNNING Group: Morning walk/run along the Charles River. Saturdays,10am. Club Cafe, 209 Columbus Avenue, Boston, MA. www.frontrunnersboston.org.

OutRyders SKIING: New England’s largest gay and lesbian ski and snowboard club. www.outryders.org.

Boston Strikers SOCCER Club: Non-profit social organization to learn and improve soccer skills in a relaxed, congenial environment. www.bostonstrikers.com.

Renaissance City SOFTBALL League: New players and boosters always welcome. www.providencesoftball.org.

Beantown SOFTBALL League: Friendly competition.

27 teams in 4 divisions of play: competitive, intermediate, and two recreational. (617) 297-7490. www.beantownsoftball.com.

LANES (Liquid Assets New England SWIMMING): Fitness and/or competition. (617) 937-5858. www.swim-lanes.org.

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TENNIS-4-All: Boston area tennis organization. www.tennis4all.org.

Cambridge Boston VOLLEYBALL Association: Players of all skill levels welcome. secretary@cbvolleyball.net www.GayVolleyball.net.

Ocean State Pride VOLLEYBALL League: Adult coed indoor league following USVBA rules. No try-outs. Fee applies. Kent County YMCA, 900 Centerville Road, Warwick. ospvolleyball@gmail.com.

East Coast WRESTLING Club: (617)937.5858 x6 ecwc@juno.com. www.eastcoastwrestlingclub.org .

Students & Youth Bristol Community College Gay/Straight Alliance (BCC/GSA): Steven Camara, Advisor. BCC-H202, 777 Elsbree Street, Fall River, MA. (774) 357-2391.

Brown University Queer Alliance: Umbrella organization at Brown University for LGBTQ groups. 863-3062. queer@brown.edu or lgbtq@brown.edu.

CCRI Triangle Alliance: an LGBTQQ student-run group at CCRI, on the Flanagan, Liston, and Knight campuses. www.ccri.edu/triangle/.

COLAGE: Support and social activities for children of LGBT parents. Coordinator Veronica Jutras. Third Saturday 10:30am-12pm. Gordon School, E. Providence. rhodeisland@colage.org www.colage.org/colage-chapter/colage-rhode-island-chapter/.

Peer Listening Line: Youth-staffed hotline for GLBT youth. Support, info and referrals. 5-10pm. Fenway Community Health Center, Boston, MA. (617) 267-9001 or (800) 399-PEER. www.fenwayhealth.org.

Salve Regina University – The Alliance: 100 Ochre Point Avenue, Newport. Contact: Mandy Hart. mandy.hart@salve.edu.

SeaQuel (Southeast Asian Queers United for Empowerment and Leadership): a program of PRYSM. Monthly Sunday meetings. 383-7450. SeaQuel@prysm.us. www.prysm.us.

S.H.E.P.A.R.D. (Stopping Homophobia, Eliminating

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Prejudices and Restoring Dignity): Providence College, 1 Cunningham Square, Providence. 865-1631. shepard@providence.edu.

The Trevor Project: The only nationwide, around-theclock crisis and suicide prevention helpline for LGBT youth. Also offers social networks. (866)4-U-TREVOR (866-488-7386). thetrevorproject.org.

University of RI Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, Queer & Questioning (LGBTIQ2): Alumni association. 874-5808. gsimonelli@uri.edu.

URI Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer Center: A cultural department for students, faculty and staff. Florence Badejo. 874-2894.

Youth Pride Inc./The Way Out: Support, education & advocacy for LGBTQQ young people ages 13-23. Monday-Thursday 12pm-8pm, Friday 4-8pm, Saturday 10am5pm. The Way Out peer support group Tuesday 5pm.

Gender Spectrum support group Tuesday 5:30pm. Ask about 14-and-under day. 743 Westminster Street, Providence. 421-5626. info@youthprideri.org www.youthprideri.org.

Support Groups & Social Services Abuse Victims and Survivors: Support on phone for LGBTQ victims & survivors of partner abuse. Confidential peer-led groups. Hotline: (617) 742-4911. TTY: (617) 227-4911. advocate@tnlr.org.

Adoption Options: Non-sectarian help. Jewish Family Service, 959 North Main Street, Providence. Contact Betsy Alper. 331-5437. www.adoptionoptions.org.

Community Care Alliance: Stipend, assistance, training provided by Family Resources Community Action.

235-6095. www.famresri.org.

Foster parents needed: For newborn to age six.

276-4300. www.childrensfriendri.org.

Family Service RI: Training, stipend, support provided for nurturing families. Family Service of RI. Contact Gregary Wright. 331-1350 ext. 3305. www.familyserviceri.org.

Seven Hills Behavioral Health: HIV Prevention and Screening. 310 South Main Street, Fall River, MA. (508) 235-1012. T.W.I.S.T. (508) 672-0378.

Blackstone Valley Advocacy Center: Offering resources for victims of domestic violence. 723-3057. www.bvadvocacycenter.org.

Compass: FTM trans info, support and social group.

Boston first Thursday 7-9pm. compassftm@gmail.com. www.compassftm.org.

Crossroads RI Hotline: (800) 367-2700.

Day One (Formerly Sexual Assault and Trauma Resource Center of RI): Counseling & legal aid for victims of sexual assault/abuse & incest. 24hr hotline. (800) 494-8100. 421-4100. www.dayoneri.org.

Options | September 2014

Domestic Violence Resource Center of South County: Support, court advocacy, counseling, safe home, info for women and men in abusive or controlling relationships. 24hr free and confidential helpline. 782-3990 or toll free 800-494-8100, www.dvrcsc.org.

Gay Fathers of Greater Boston: Support. 738 Main St. #323, Waltham, MA. (781) 333-8429. info@gayfathersboston.org, www.gayfathersboston.org.

Gay Officers Action League (GOAL)/New England: Law enforcement officers (sworn & civilian), fire, rescue and publicly employed EMS. Confidential. PO Box 587, Boston, MA 02117. (617) 376-3612. info@goalne.org, www.goalne.org.

Gay Share: Coming Out? Gay men’s support group. No fee. Wednesday 7:30pm. Contact Tom or Mike. 369-9448. info@gayshare.org, www.gayshare.org.

GLBTQ Domestic Violence Project: Support, info, shelter. 955 Massachusetts Avenue, Private Message Box 131, Cambridge, MA. (800) 832-1901. www.glbtqdvp.org.

Helpline for LGBT Youth: Trevor Helpline and social networks for crisis and suicide prevention. 24/7.

(866) 4-U-Trevor.

HIV+ Gay Men’s Support Group: Refreshments served.

AIDS Care Ocean State, 18 Parkis Avenue, Providence.

521-3603. New members contact Scott. 640-3108.

Kathys’ Group: Free support group for lesbians with cancer or any life-threatening illness. Partners and caregivers welcome. Meets monthly in Providence. 888-5KATHYS. Mantalk of S.E. Mass: Socializing and discussions for gay, bi and curious men. Confidential. Drug and alcohol-free.

18+. Thursdays in Taunton and first Tuesdays in New Bedford. 7-8:30pm. mantalksouthcoast@yahoo.com.

National Lesbian & Gay Journalists Assoc./New England: Works for fair and accurate media coverage of LGBT issues. info@nlgja.org, www.nlgja.org.

PFLAG (Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians & Gays): Greater Providence chapter, serves all RI and southeastern MA. First Wednesday 6:45pm. Met School, 325 Public Street, Providence. 751-7571.

PFLAGprovidence@gmail.com, www.pflagprovidence.org.

RI Coalition Against Domestic Violence: 24hr helpline: (800) 494-8100. 467-9940.

RI Rainbow Support Group: For people with disabilities who identify as LGBTQ. Last Tuesday. 98 Rolfe Street, Cranston. 6-7:30pm. Contact Ken Renaud. 785-2100.

Samaritans: 24hr hotline for suicidal, lonely, despairing, depressed. (800) 365-4044. 272-4044 (RI only). www.samaritansri.org.

Sexual Health Education & Advocacy Program: HIV, sexual wellness, domestic violence risk reduction. Free, confidential, bilingual (Spanish). No caller ID used. Calls blocked for safety. 861-6191 ext. 121.

Options | September 2014

Sojourner House: Support, shelter, advocacy and information for people in abusive relationships. No caller ID used. Outgoing calls blocked for safety. 24hr helpline 765-3232. 861-6191. www.sojournerri.org Straight Spouses Group: For information on groups and online support. www.straightspouse.org.

TGI Network of RI: Support, advocacy for transgender, transsexual, gender-variant, genderqueer and/or intersex people. Borderlands peer group first and third Tuesday 7-9pm. 441-5058. info@tginetwork.org, www.tginetwork.org.

Trans* Partners New England: Gives romantic partners of transgender people a confidential, safe space to explore the impact of a loved one’s gender identity on their relationships, and to connect with other loved ones of transgender people. First Wednesday 6:30-8:30pm.

Providence. Location unpublished for privacy. partners@tginetwork.org.

Trans* Youth Family Allies: Support for gender-variant and transgender children ages 3-18. info@imatyfa.org, www.imatyfa.org.

Transgender American Veterans Association (TAVA): Growing organization to address the concerns of fair treatment of transgender veterans and active duty service members. www.tavausa.org.

Women’s Resource Center of Newport and Bristol Counties: Offering services to victims of domestic violence. 846-5263.www.wrcnbc.org.

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Worth a Look

by The Lit Chick

To each of us who has continually struggled and failed to fit in as a typical woman or man, writers Ivan Coyote and Rae Spoon pose a question: Is it possible that the idea of being a woman or a man (or even something in between) has failed us?

That question is at the center of their book, Gender Failure, an adaptation of the mixed media, music and spoken-word live show that the pair developed and performed throughout the United States and Europe. The book could almost pass as a multimedia experience; it’s punctuated with song lyrics and tabs, illustrations and photos.

Coyote and Spoon take turns telling deeply personal stories that show the utter failure of gender norms to define not only themselves but also everyone around them.

Coyote’s stories range from the loss of a childhood friend to the struggle to be “man enough” for breast removal surgery. “There is no box to check for not wanting a box at all,” writes Coyote.

“No one knows how to fix that.”

Spoon’s stories highlight a failure to obtain acceptance from any group, starting with a rigid and abusive Pentecostal household, to coming out as a lesbian, to coming out as a man, and finally coming out as none of the above.

“I was not in the wrong body, I was in the wrong world,” writes Spoon. “I am the happiest I’ve ever been in my body, and it has been such a relief to realize that I am no longer living inside the problem.”

Gender Failure succeeds at unexpectedly flipping the expected.

Order a copy online or, better yet, ask your local bookstore to order you a copy.

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I would travel across the pond to hear singer-songwriter Heather Peace sing from her second studio release, The Thin Line.The Briton’s strong, clear voice has a beautiful melancholy and haunting tone reminiscent of Adele or Lana Del Rey, and the songs alternate between piano and guitar-driven melodies, with heavy drumbeat accompaniment.

Fans of the show Lip Service may know Peace as Detective Sam Murray, but this classically trained pianist actually got her start in musical theatre (as Eliza Doolittle in My Fair Lady), and that background can be heard in both her voice and the arrangement of her songs.

The title song is an addictive power ballad, and both “Forever Drowning” and “Dance with the Devil” evoke the push-pull of a relationship infused with personality disorder. I’m a sucker for Peace’s familiar chord progressions, and although I could probably listen to them forever, the introduction of an unexpected power beat or piano-violin combination elevates each to an entirely new level.

A few singles from The Thin Line (and Fairytales, Peace’s first album) are available as free downloads at www. heatherpeace.com, but if you’re a fan of soulful ballads and thoughtful album arrangement, I recommend downloading the album on iTunes.

The queer YouTube series Tough Love elevates awkward silences to an art form. Starring writer/director Steven Bell and Blaire Wendell, the series is focused on two best-friend roommates (conveniently, “Steven” and “Blaire”) who recently moved to Queens (“the thirdbest borough”) to chase their dream of being actors. Mostly, that chasing involves sitting on the couch, watching TV, and playing board games. Says Blaire, “Steven’s my big queer roommate and I’m his number one fag hag.”

The series has found its pace this summer, as Blaire begins to consider her lesbian tendencies and invites others over to watch TV, too. Co-written by Slacktory proprietor Nick Douglas, Tough Love draws out its embarrassing situations with an unassuming charm until they reach a comedic crescendo.

Even though they feel longer, the episodes are only two to four minutes long, perfect for those of you with short attention spans. I was surprised at how much story could be developed in three minutes.

Tough Love is a hilarious take on the everyday struggles of frenemy housemates who struggle to make it within the cruel world of their own four walls. Find Tough Love on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/user/ ToughLoveWebseries.

Options | September 2014

Options | September 2014

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